#🐡 / ic // still warming up sir

[sclepurpose]

PARKS AND RECREATION SENTENCE STARTER

@eievuimultimuse // “I like saying no. It lowers their enthusiasm.” (from 07 SF while he’s still a crime boss lol)

" You sound a lot like my boss. " He can't help the comment that slips out, but c'mon -- Minion has to admit, it DOES sound a LOT like something Megamind would say, and that amuses the fish immensely. " I think you two would get along. "

[sclepurpose]

@eievuimultimuse // “You need to rest.” (from megs <3)

My muse is sick, and won’t admit it. Send “You need to rest.” for their reaction.

" Sir, please -- " Despite both the raspiness in his voice and nausea from coughing, Minion tries his damnedest to protest, even still trying to stand up. " I'm just fine. Don't worry about me, go do whatever it was you had planned. "

[sclepurpose]

@eievuimultimuse // cont.

THOSE DAMN HUMANS. Minion couldn't help the pure rage that washed over his expression when he'd watched it happen through the school window prior that day, and as much as he'd wanted to jump out of his tank and take a chunk out of every single one of those kids, he refrained, knowing that he needed to be by his best friend's side.

It hadn't been until they'd gotten back to the prison, in the privacy of their cell, when Minion had spoken ; a promise that he very much intended to keep. Already, the fish's little mind was racing, swarming with all sorts of thoughts and plans.

His Sir's voice rings out again, forcing Minion out of his thoughts, and he turns back to him. A smile finally crosses his expression, and he moves closer to the edge of the tank, resting his head against the glass where Megamind's hand rested.

" I'll do anything for you, Sir. You're my best friend. " More like ONLY friend, but he doesn't need to know that, it makes it sound less special.

Megamind's smile fades, and Minion's expression falls with it, brow furrowing in worry. " ...they should. What's there not to like about you, Sir ? You're intelligent, kind...I think they're all JEALOUS of how amazing you are. " Their tiny pea-brains can't comprehend anything different, he bites back.

[sclepurpose]

@eievuimultimuse // S.C. ( 4 finta -- fish friends !! )

" So, that crab on your head... " There isn't a hint of disgust or judgement in his tone, moreso curiosity. " Is he NEUROLOGICALLY LINKED to you ? I've never seen two living beings be linked like that, though I am linked to my suit like that, so I was just, y'know, WONDERING. "

[sclepurpose]

Now, Minion had two different avenues he could take: he could tell Bernard exactly how he felt, that he was simply at the wrong place at the wrong time, and that he was lucky he was dead just for even THREATENING Megamind ; or, he could go the BETTER route, and try to calm the situation more. Either way, though, he knew he was going to have to up the Lair's security and keep an eye on his boss from here on out.

" The intent wasn't to fuck up your life. " He decided on, finally, after a strong internal battle. " You were in the wrong place at the wrong time, the closest one. Megamind explained everything to me -- you were just Lucky Contestant Number 1. Trust me, if Sir had a choice, he probably would've chosen literally anyone else. " Also, to be fair, Megamind had mentioned Bernard accused him of wearing a tacky costume...so Minion had a feeling maybe that had...played a part in it. Somewhat. Maybe. A little bit.

" Saying you're not going to kill them then destroying donuts of him doesn't give off very GOOD VIBES. " It was more of an observational comment than anything else. " But I'll be sure to pass on the WARNING. " And hopefully tell Megamind to avoid the museum rrom here on out.

" You wouldn't be able to kill him in that office, anyways. Much too small for an actual battle. You'd probably fare better at a STREET FIGHT. "

Bernard raises a brow as Minion begins speaking, not sure what to make of his disjointed ramblings, or being likened to a dog for that matter. It was a little strange that Minion was putting so much effort into smoothing things over, though maybe it was true that he and Megamind had turned over a new leaf unironically. It was clear however that his initial suspicions were correct, in that Minion wasn't exactly keen on letting Bernard anywhere near his superior.

He huffed and regarded Minion with frustration.

"So that's how it is? You just get to screw up someone's life and get away with it because you've got the muscle?" he accused dryly. It wasn't much of a surprise that villain justice was a harsh reality, but he would find absolution one way or another. Still, it looked like Minion was in the middle of something judging by the way he had suspiciously hidden his cargo from view. No wonder it seemed like Minion was trying a little hard to ward him away.

Bernard crosses his arms and sighs somewhat angrily.

"If you're intent on skittering away, you tell your boss to come see me when he finally gets the nerve-- he knows where I work, obviously."

The scrawny bastard would have to eventually, as the museum was being renovated to accommodate the city's new hero.

"I'm not going to kill him in my office if it makes you feel any better... but in principle, he can't be a hero and a coward. Our city just got rid of disingenuous idiot of a hero, we don't need another." Bernard emphasized his words with a scowl. "Now if you'll excuse me... I've got some Megamind-shaped donuts to chew on."

God, he needed some coffee and quick.

[sclepurpose]

@xeversayfishxace // S.C.

Minion had NEVER met another talking fish before -- for the longest time, he'd always tried to make friends with the dish Megamind would put in his tank for him, but usually, nothing ever really came out of it, and those fish wound up being eaten in the end. But who knew, all he needed to do was go to another city for something for his Sir, and finally. There it was.

Staring the other robotic fish down, Minion's brow lifted in confusion, and he hesitantly offered a little wave.

" H...hello- man, if I knew there was another robo-fish out there, I would've come here sooner, heh-heh. "

[sclepurpose]

" It's not my arms that will fail me...

But this world takes more STRENGTH than it gave me. "

[sclepurpose]

Send me 🌻 and I'll tell you whatever the fuck I want.

@championofdarkland // 🌻

" I used to be AFRAID of cats, y'know, when I was a kid. Couldn't help it -- I was a little fish in a round sphere, I didn't exactly have anywhere to run or any way to fight back besides biting them, but who knew if my venom would work on them or not ? Luckily, eventually, Megamind worked on making me my suit, and once I had it, I had a way to fight back against them, so the fear eventually went away. "

He pauses, fingers curling. " Of course, now I'm purr-fectly content with cats. They're actually very sweet...if you find the right ones. "

[sclepurpose]

MINION HAD TO stop for a moment to ponder -- after all, the question had come out of seemingly nowhere ( at least, to him of course, provided he'd been distracted by cleaning off a countertop. ) But he grinned as he answered her questions, setting his rag down.

" WELL -- WE DON'T have an exact estimate since our planet's days were a little longer than here on Earth, a few hours' difference...but we guessed around December 15th, if I recall correctly. I've thrown him a couple of little celebrations with just me and the Brainbots, and the Doom Syndicate also threw that giant cake at him once...but that's about it. Why do you ask, are you planning something ? I'd LOVE to help ! "

@sculpurpose gets a roxanne

"You know when Megamind's birthday is right? Has he ever had a birthday party?" She's plotting certainly-- but in the best way. Megamind was someone truly dear to her, she wanted to show him the joys being good had to offer.

[sclepurpose]

Send me a🌻 and I'll tell you whatever the fuck I want.

@eievuimultimuse // 🌻

" I don't form crushes as easily as other people think -- I mean, I'm not aromantic personally, I know that for a fact, but I've just been...more focused on other things more than socializing enough to form crushes on people. There's a word for that, I think, I just don't know it off the top of my head.

But, I've had a few crushes. Celebrities, mostly. Like Ryan Gosling. He's hot. Uh...Halle Berry, especially in Catwoman. Y'know. Normal crushes that, like, everyone has.

Though...there is someone in the city that I may or may not...have a thing for. No one but me knows, so. Keep that a secret. " And he giggles like a fucking schoolgirl.

[sclepurpose]

Send me a🌻 and I'll tell you whatever the fuck I want.

@peachiiihearts // 🌻

" I hated school. Like...a LOT. The socialization aspect, at least. All these fake ass people with their fake ass hierarchies and cliques...not to mention all the bullying. It got so bad that Sir and I would play hooky or skip class so much we got detention every day for a month. I told so many teachers and counselors but none of them ever did anything about it...a couple even joined in.

I, uh...definetly had a hatred of humans for a long while because of it. I've learned not all people are like that, but...I swear to the sunset, I see some of these people on the street and they wave hi to me and Sir like nothing ever happened and sometimes I wanna sock 'em in the face. I never would, but the thought is...there. "

[sclepurpose]

Send me a🌻 and I'll tell you whatever the fuck I want.

@eyeknowmayhem // 🌻

" So, I never really told Megamind this, but I remember a lot from our planet -- at least, a lot more than he does. I was born a few years before him, around five Earth years, if I recall correctly.

From birth, I was pretty much taught how to be a caretaker. His species and my species were like humans and dogs -- although, we could communicate with each other very well, but that's beside the point.

One of my earliest memories is being about...two or three. Sir's mom, she was just pregnant with him. See, their species had a longer gestation period than humans, being around two years. My mother was her caretaker, and my father had been Sir's father's caretaker. Our families had been connected for quite a long time.

Sir's mother entered the room, and I was in my enclosure, a giant spherical tank of water. We had sand at the bottom -- though, it was a lot thicker than Earth sand, but it behaved quite the same. I was playing around in it, making it cloud up the water. She laughed when I said, in that obnoxious little toddler voice, ' I like sand, it's messy. ' She came up to the glass and summoned me over, lifting her shirt a bit and letting me see the baby in her belly -- at least, the bump. I saw it move, and man, I was the happiest fish on the planet at that point.

I told her I couldn't wait to meet my new best friend, and she said it would only be a little while longer. Of course, I didn't get to meet Sir officially until I was ready, she reminded me, and I only had a few years to go... "

He pauses, falling silent, suddenly listless eyes staring at a spot on the floor...before he shakes his thoughts clear. His eyes almost light back up.

" By the time I had a little bit left to go, the black hole showed up. And Megamind and I were put on the little craft his parents made, and that was the day I got to meet him...when everything else around us fell. "

[sclepurpose]

Me out here genuinely contemplating: "Obviously the Megamind gang are villains in a meta-sense but have Megamind and Minion ever actually killed or even physically hurt someone? Outside of thinking they killed Metroman of course."

All this to say I'm a Mutual who put Minion on the nice list after thinking long and hard over it. lol

" HEHE...LOOKS LIKE the charges aren't gonna stick after all ! "

[sclepurpose]

@stolencrownsofplenty / “Are you okay?”

Send “Are you okay?” for my muse to have a mental breakdown in front of yours.

" YES -- I AM !! " He practically yelled, but his hands went to his mouth in shock and he quickly shook his head, waving his hands. " I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-- I'm alright. I just...

UGH...STARS ABOVE, I need a break... "

[sclepurpose]

@stolencrownsofplenty / 🙈

Send 🙈 for a thread where my muse is (temporarily?) blind.

" ACK -- SHIT !! " HE hissed as he bumped into the wall, carefully trying to navigate his way through the Lair -- of course, being suddenly robbed of one's sight is enough to make even the simplest movements and path nearly impossible, especially with how much shit Megamind would leave lying around sometimes. As annoying as it was, it had never been a hazard because Minion had been able to see it before. Now, though...well, he tripped over a wrench in the hallway. A wrench that should have been in the cabinet...not that he was able to tell what the hell it was, though.

INSTEAD, HE JUST saw nothingness. Not quite blackness, but it was just all...fuzzy. Blurry, things blending with each other that never typically blended together...it sucked. He couldn't even see what was what anymore.

LETTING OUT A defeated sigh, the fishape sat up ( at least, as far as he could tell, he was sitting up. In actuality, though, it looked more like he was half slumped against the wall, half trying to take a nap on the floor, ) and he called out.

" SIR ? MISS RITCHI ? Princess Solis ? Brainbots ? ...anyone ? "

[sclepurpose]

@stolencrownsofplenty / "If you're gonna keep working, do you at least want some coffee?" ((this is coming from a lamb god who does not sleep at all and is probably making this fish's sleep habits worse))

for muses who don't understand the meaning of the phrase ' take a break ' … sentence starters

" IT'S PROBABLY FOR the better if I don't have any -- coffee makes me SLEEPY. No clue why, it just does. I appreciate the offer though, thank you. " He waved a dismissive hand, going back to his previous mopping. This fish has not slept in days, someone make him sleep-