#🌦️🐍.SNAPE

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

oh, so it's a pattern

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

MY HANDFUL OF FOLLOWERS PLEASE VOTE

Circusgoth's Self Ship Grand Slam - Round 1: Romantics, Face-off 5

Reminders: You’re voting for who you'd think would win in a fight (with all their weapons, abilities, and knowledge in tact), each poll will last 24 hours, and on the weekends polls will be posted around every hour between 10am and 10pm my time to the best of my ability.

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

thrill of the night

Ship: Severus Snape x Sirius Black (a/n: I ship them as enemies with benefits)

Word Count: 1586

a/n: holy fuck y'all i've been spinning this concept in the microwave of my brain since i started considering snirius as a ship and i Finally wrote something about it. snape is genderfluid in this fic btw, he just doesn't have the word for it yet, and sirius is bi but he's still registering this whole "severus is kind of hot actually" thing.

Summary: Set post-Hogwarts graduation but pre-death of Lily and James. Sirius discovers Severus has been turning tricks under the guise of being a woman because you don't exactly get paid to be a Death Eater. CWs: Overall sexual themes but no explicit sex or nudity (only because I'm not very confident in writing smut, but if somebody wrote smut inspired by this fic I would cry (positive)), "Snivellus."

It had been a long week for Sirius. Everyone he normally would’ve hung out with seemed to blow him off. Everyone had plans, except for him. So Friday night came, and with it, the frustrations of a lonely, envious young man. Such frustrations led Sirius to the seedier part of muggle London. He never minded being around the non-magical population… sometimes he felt he even preferred it. Still, he couldn’t imagine a life without magic. He’d just left a bar when he spied her. Tall, dark-haired, and glowing in the light of a street lamp. Just by the look of her attire, Sirius knew her profession. She wore a short leather skirt and a tight bra, though her arms and shoulders were hidden beneath a cropped coat; all black. He checked his pockets for cash, then approached, clearing his throat.

“Evening, madam,” he flashed his signature smile. She took a long drag of her cigarette, eyeing Sirius coolly.

“Evening. Are you looking for company?” Her voice was low- low enough to briefly stun Sirius -and she punctuated her question with a suggestive raise of her eyebrow. He nodded.

“I know an inn not far from here,” he gestured down the street. “What do you charge?”

“Thirty pounds, up front, just sex. Fifteen additional for anything… beyond that.”

Sirius frowned. “That’s a bit steep…”

“Take it or leave it. We all have to eat, you know.”

There was something about this woman of the night that intrigued Sirius. He’d done this song and dance before, even charmed his way into discounts. Something told him this one wasn’t the type. “Alright, sweetheart, whatever you say.”

She nodded, causing her bobbed hair to ripple slightly, then dropped her cigarette on the cobblestone and crushed it beneath her heel. Sirius led her to the inn and booked a room. It was only when they were inside that Sirius noticed the pouch tied to the woman’s belt.

“What’s in there?” He asked, curiously indicating it.

“Essentials I need for my job,” she suddenly glared at him as he began to loosen his belt, thrusting forth her hand. “Money first.”

“Right, right, yeah,” he quickly took out his own pouch, grimacing as he observed the contents. He was running low on muggle money. “Er, listen, luv, could I send you some money later? I’m… a bit lighter than expected—”

“Oh, just give it here,” the woman snapped, snatching the pouch from his hands… before retrieving the correct amount in wizarding money. “Are you into any funny stuff?” She kept a guarded hold on the pouch until Sirius answered.

“No! Or, yes, but I… you’re a witch!”

“Don’t act so shocked.” She huffed, handing back the pouch. “Believe me, I am just as surprised to find a wizard here as you are surprised to find me. Now get on the bed.”

Sirius gulped and flushed, a sly smile coming to him. “Isn’t that my line, luv?~”

“Oh, please, as if I’m going to let myself be pushed around by the likes of you.” She untied the pouch from her belt, dropped in the coins, then placed it atop the room’s dresser.

“I guess we’ll see about that,” Sirius purred, stepping closer. Suddenly, their lips clashed in a struggle to dominate the scene. Sirius’ hands snaked around her hips to grab at her rear, while her hands began trailing under his shirt, exploring his body. As heat and passion were shared between them, Sirius couldn’t help the lingering feeling of familiarity. He had never laid eyes on this woman before, nor had he ever had the honour to touch her, so why did it feel as if they had met before? Why was this attitude he encountered like an echo from the past?

Things came to a halt as he tried to remove her jacket. She held him at arm’s length as she quite seriously announced, “The jacket stays on.”

Sirius regarded her in confusion. “Huh? Why’s that?”

The woman scowled. “None of your business.”

That was the expression that flipped a switch in Sirius’ memory. “Hold on, do I know you from somewhere?”

Blink-and-you’ll-miss-it fear dashed across the woman’s face, but even then she couldn’t hide her embarrassed blush. “What are you talking about?” She stepped toward the dresser, ready to grab her pouch, and presumably her wand, at a moment’s notice.

“When you made that face… it reminded me of someone…” As the memories came to him, Sirius’ feelings began to warp. An odd mixture of lust and contempt was brewing inside of him. “In fact, the more I look at you, I’m sure… perhaps we went to school together?”

Steely silence was the woman’s only response. He cleared his throat. “I’m Sirius, I was in Gryffindor at Hogwarts—”

An unexpected fury took hold of the woman’s pronounced features as she regarded him anew. “How could I not see it?” She seethed, holding her hand in a way to block Sirius’ beard from her vision. She retrieved her wand with the other hand. “Sirius Black. So, your bollocks finally dropped low enough to bring your arsehair up to your chin? Or did you get implants?”

This change in demeanour made Sirius’ eyes widen. He knew in an instant who this was. “Snivellus,” he croaked.

“You seriously didn’t recognise me?” Severus rolled his eyes, “Though I suppose dogs aren’t necessarily known for their sense of sight…”

Sirius was too shocked to spark the flames of his deep-seated hatred for the person before him. With a shaking finger, he pointed at Severus’ soft chest. It wasn’t the biggest by any means, but it wasn’t flat, either. “How…? Are… are you a woman, now?”

Severus blinked at his old schoolyard bully. “It’s a transfiguration spell, you twit. And… it’s none of your business.”

Sirius’ brow creased. “I think it is. I might not like you, but I’m going to respect whoever you are, sexuality-wise…”

Severus’ expression became uncomfortable, his eyes darting away from Sirius. “Then, I suppose… I’m not sure anymore. When you do what I’ve done, the line gets a bit… hazy.” He cleared his throat, then waved his wand sophistically over his body, murmuring an incantation that flattened his chest and, presumably, turned his genitals right side out. The clear pain behind Severus’ eyes as this transformation took place further distracted Sirius, who normally would’ve gotten off on such a thing. It seemed that the brief moment where Sirius saw Severus as desirable had struck him dumb.

Awkwardness made his skin prickle, and he rubbed the backs of his hands accordingly. “Why’re you out here, posing as a… woman?”

Severus clucked his tongue. “You can call me a whore. It’s no worse than anything else you’ve ever called me.” He picked up his pouch and made to push by, but was grabbed by the arm, making him freeze as Sirius pointed his wand in his face.

“Don’t think just because I’m acting like I’ve been stupefied I’m just going to let you go,” he growled. “What are you up to?”

Severus’ expression gave him nothing. “What do you think?” What can a Death Eater gain from selling his body?

“You mean for me to believe this isn't some kind of undercover operation?”

A single heartbeat passed before a short honking sound escaped Severus, and it was only by his body language that Sirius realised he was laughing, though it wasn’t necessarily in mirth. The unfamiliar sound and sight made his insides writhe, his face flooded with embarrassment, though he knew not the exact source.

“Of course you’d think this is something to laugh about, you pervert. I can’t believe I even—”

“Me, a pervert?? When you were about to be caught pants down, balls deep in someone you only acknowledged because you could hurt him? Would you rather have found out who I was by the sounds I made when you hit me?” As Severus spoke the final proposition colour bloomed high in his cheeks.

Sirius stared at him, angry and frenzied and pent-up all at once. His wand remained trained on Severus’ face, though he could think of no spells to cast. He glanced down only for a moment and sucked in a quick breath as his vision was graced once more with those leather pleats clinging to the front of Severus’ thighs, hiding little. “Fuuuck…” He growled as he stowed away his wand and absently rubbed at his nose.

Severus quickly composed himself, lowering his voice further, “Let us part ways and forget this ever happened, lest the moment get uglier than it already is. In fact, if it would ease your mind, Black, allow me to Obliviate this specific memory for you and send you on your way.”

“And let you make off with my money like a bandit, Snivellus? Fat chance. I want to get my worth out of this, transfigure yourself again.” Sirius went back to loosening his belt, tongue lecherously swiping his teeth as Severus took his time to flush, the rosiness spreading down from his cheeks to his neck. Sirius fingered his pants button, continuing, “Well, you can either do that, or you can fork over the cash. Your choice, mate.”

Severus’ eyes narrowed at Sirius before he waved his wand and once more went through that tedious process of shifting from one end of the spectrum to the other. “Once again, I am the couch you hump…” He lamented aloud through gritted teeth, “at least I’m getting paid this time.”

Sirius winked. “That’s the spirit, Sevvy.”

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

Severus: Oh Merlin, it's my ex. 😒

Minerva: You dated Bellatrix??

Severus: What?? No... him.

Lucius: 😉✨️

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

my immediate headcanon for snape will always be demiromantic bisexual cis man, but i love everybody who headcanons them as a transwoman and i absolutely am willing to explore the themes of transfeminity in their character

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

Severus: Remember to hydrate and look after your needs.

Harry: You drink spiked tea on exam days and you haven’t had a proper rest in Merlin knows how long.

Severus, pouring a shot of vodka: Do as I say, not as I do.

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

snape ships i think about ranked by how much i think about them

snily (severus/lily) 💚❤️: the og snape ship, i wish things could've worked out for them but i also like the tragedy of their relationship. to me, lily represented everything severus didn't have as a little boy and that's largely what drew his interest in her, along with her personality and looks. maybe if he realized his mistakes and repented sooner (and james owned up to the fact he was also a massive git), they could've at least been friends.

snirius (severus/sirius) 🦇🐕: tied with snily in my head and basically the opposite side of the coin, my favourite hateship hevahevhve. "you want to fuck me so bad it makes you look stupid" energy. i want to write a "there was only one bed" fic between them. a purely sexual relationship but i think there is potential for the briefest of tender moments between them from time to time.

snucius (severus/lucius) 🖤🤍: they are exes to me. but i also like the idea of lucius actually being able to provide what severus craved from lily, because this man has wealth that is just collecting dust honestly. also they were canonically friends so it's like the second most realistic relationship after snily.

neverus (severus/narcissa) 🌨💎: i'm mostly including this because severus is a bi king and i wanted another m/f ship to consider that isn’t gross and illegal (you know what i'm alluding to here), but i also could see the potential. they're both neglected, albeit in different ways, and she put so much trust in him to protect her son.

snupin (severus/remus) 🌕🧪: i have very little thoughts on this ship but i understand the appeal, remus is the only marauder to be practically decent toward severus when they cross paths again.

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

this is such a severitus song it's not even funny

YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN YOUR FATHER'S SON YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN WHAT I'VE BECOME

YOU REMIND ME OF WHO I COULD'VE BEEN HAD I BEEN STRONGER AND BRAVER WAY BACK THEN

YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE THAN THE WARS YOU'VE WON

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

Severus: You're always wearing such restrictive clothing... I'd quite enjoy seeing you try slipping into something long and flowing for once. Severus: Like the Thames. Sirius: Sirius: Get in the Thames... you get in the Thames!

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

Every time I see an art piece depicting Snape genuinely smiling and happy I ascend a little

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

I completely forgot about the concept of enemies with benefits. That's the Snirius dynamic to me

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

it doesn't make sense canonically but to soothe my aching heart i will always believe severus survived being attacked by nagini by keeping an antidote to her venom on hand 💔😔

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

SORRY THIS IS CRACKING ME UP WHY IS HE HOLDING IT LIKE THAT

fuckin "quieres?"😂😂

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

i don’t miss you, i miss the misery

Ship: Werewolf!Severus Snape x Sirius Black (Hateship)

Word Count: 1372

Summary: To explain the AU a bit, James didn't save Severus from following Remus into the Shrieking Shack and Remus attacked him, but Severus managed to survive the ordeal. Dumbledore provided Severus with a safehouse after he graduated while Remus was carted off to Azkaban sometime after, and James and Sirius walk free. This fic takes place between graduating from Hogwarts and Severus returning to Hogwarts as a teacher, basically pre-James & Lily's deaths. Sirius appears on Severus' doorstep to announce Remus' capture and to seemingly apologize for treating him so horribly... one can imagine how that turns out.

🗡️NO TERFS NO BIGOTS NO PROSHITTERS🗡️

It was late autumn in the Scotland woodlands, on the cusp of winter, a thin layer of frost covering every dead leaf and frozen trail. The cold crept into Severus Snape’s cabin, even when he kept it as hot as he could stand it without burning the place down. Even upon contracting lycanthropy, his blood continued to run cold. Still, that was the only thing he felt remained the same, besides the solitude. That night in the Shrieking Shack back in Hogsmeade had upheaved his life beyond words. He didn’t know what had happened to those involved that night, and he preferred to keep it that way. Dumbledore had found him his safehouse, and he was convinced that was where he would stay for the rest of his days. It seemed not even the Death Eaters could reach him here, though he swore he had seen Lucius combing the woods some evenings.

Buried in three sweaters, his cloak, heavy pants, thermal underwear, a lengthy scarf, and two pairs of fingerless gloves, Severus tended to his fire, poking at the logs and feeling the warmth on his pale face. His muscles stilled, hair standing on end, ears prickling as he thought he heard a knock at the door- he knew he heard a knock at the door. He could smell them, too. Sweat and musk and oils on their skin, the dirt under their nails, but stronger yet, plain soap and… pomade. He was torn between throwing the door open and thrusting his wand forcefully at who he knew was out there, and simply ignoring it altogether. Unfortunately, the knocker wasn’t patient, and pounded on the door a second time, shaking it in its frame. Severus could make out a muffled yell.

“I’m knocking because I’m trying to be polite- don’t make me blast down the door, because I will, Snivellus!”

Full of rage in the blink of an eye, Severus rose from where he crouched before the fireplace and whipped his wand out of his pocket, yanking open the door. “How did you find me?” He growled.

Before him stood Sirius Black, tall, well-built, and horribly, deceitfully handsome. “I asked Dumbledore. They locked up Remus.”

Chest still heaving, Severus blinked, realizing how tired and lost Sirius looked. He kept his wand pointed at his chest, hand steady.

“Azkaban,” Severus said it aloud to confirm it for himself. “If anyone should be locked away it should be you and James Potter!”

“I know.” There was a hard glint in Sirius’ eyes and his jaw locked slightly as he admitted this. “May I come in?”

Colour rose in Severus’ face as he began to splutter in disbelief. “You- you really- after- what- who do you- Come? In??” He spat, his wand hand jerking forward almost of its own accord and angry sparks flying from the tip, missing the hem of Sirius’ travelling cloak by inches.

“May I please come in?” Sirius pleaded through gritted teeth before holding up his hands and wiggling his fingers. “It’s getting a bit nippy out now that the sun’s gone down, Snape, and I forgot my gloves.”

“The gall of the Black family knows no bounds,” Severus hissed as he reluctantly stepped aside, his eyes not wavering from Sirius for a second. “What?! What could be so important, besides telling me your so-called friend received what should’ve been your downfall, that you need to violate my home with your presence on tonight of all nights?!”

Sirius entered the cabin and closed the door behind him, pinching the bridge of his nose and muttering something… something that almost sounded apologetic. It was such an odd noise to come from the man before him that Severus faltered, lowering his wand slightly.

“What?”

“I said I’mf… sfrrfymf…” Sirius mumbled, trailing off again and refusing to look him in the eye. Severus opened the door again.

“If you’ve nothing to say, get. Out.”

“Severus, I’m sorry I goaded you into going after Remus!” Sirius barked, still not looking him in the face. A shiver ran through Severus’ body as he slowly closed the door again. His eye twitched as he stared ahead.

“You’re lying to my face.”

“I’m not! I was stupid, it was stupid, I didn’t understand--”

“You understood full well that I would be maimed if I went into that house. If I had died, my blood would’ve been on all of your hands. James and you and Remus, the whole damned lot of you.”

“I should’ve taken Remus more seriously!”

“That you should’ve, Black. You were a terrible friend amongst terrible friends.” Severus sneered, relishing in the fact he could insult Sirius in this state, yet he still did not trust that the man was entirely remorseful. It had not been that long ago that this all had happened, after all, and Sirius seemed very set in his path. So desperate to shake off the name “Black” that he did not care who he hurt along the way.

“I know,” Sirius wrung his hands. “I haven’t slept since I saw it in the papers… Remus’ sentence, I mean.”

“Did it take his wrongful imprisonment to shock you into reality, Black?” Feeling more powerful than he ever had while being in the same room as one of his tormentors, he couldn’t help himself. With a passionate thought and a subtle twitch of his wand, Sirius suddenly flew into the air, hung upside down by his ankle by an invisible force. He yelped in fear while Severus’ breathing quickened in excitement. “Do you see how it feels, now?”

Sirius struggled in the air, red in the face. “Put me down Sni- Snape! I’m trying to be nice, please, give me some credit!”

“Nice? Don’t kid yourself…” Severus spoke disgustedly as he settled into his armchair, bemusedly eying Sirius’ floating body. “You haven’t a nice bone in your entire body.”

“I could say the same for you.” Sirius’ face grew dark as he glared down at him. Suddenly, Severus was back on his feet.

“Only because you and your friends exacerbated what problems I already had! You didn’t give me a chance to be ‘nice!’ Even Lily…” He froze, choking on his own breath, eyes bulging. Silence, aside from the crackling fire, descended upon the cabin like a wake of buzzards upon a carcass as Sirius and Severus shared a long stare. For the first time that evening, Severus’ hands began to shake, and his sense of power began to diminish.

“You’re not wrong, you know,” Sirius finally spoke after a moment or two. “But really, whose fault was it that the two of you fell apart? She tried to show you kindness, expecting the same in return, but you couldn’t even handle that.”

Severus settled back down into his chair, still silent.

“Maybe we’ve both been daft this whole time.”

“Watch your head.”

“What--?”

Suddenly, Sirius came crashing back to the floor, landing on his back and knocking the air out of his lungs. Severus watched him lazily as he slowly resumed a standing position.

“I don’t accept your apology. I don’t trust you. And I certainly don’t feel like ‘bonding’ over mental instability, Black.” Severus stood once more. “In fact, I believe you’ve only come here because they carted off your boyfriend and now you’re looking for another emotional support werewolf to fill the void and, forgive the expression, lick your wounds.”

Subtly, Sirius swallowed as Severus continued. “I now ask you, as kindly as I can, to fuck off and never bother me again.”

“I suppose I can tell you then that it was Lily’s idea for me to visit you in the first place.”

Severus’ eyes blazed with fury and a loud bang filled the room, along with a flash of light and a wooshing sound that passed within seconds. When the light cleared, Sirius Black was nowhere to be seen, having clearly apparated from the scene. Instead, there was now a large, black scorch mark on the opposite wall, where Severus’ hex had missed.

“Blast it all…!” He snarled and kicked out angrily before swearing as his foot connected with his coffee table, gripping it and hopping up and down for a moment. How I hate that man.

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

"At least we now know your mouth is good for something, Black."

[that-transsexual-slytherin]

Thinking about if Snape's s/o learned or knew about how he felt about Lily and tried to change themself to be more like she was, and the flurry of emotions that would cause :0[