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#❅ (GENERAL) ANONYMOUS // what’s up SPECS?
arkturusz · 6 months
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@cult-of-the-eye here it is, hope you like it :3
MAG[REDACTED] - Blood in the Machine
Anonymous statement, regarding the statement maker's purchase and use of a strange desktop computer. Original statement given 4th of February 2024, recording by Arcturus Walker, head archivist of the Magnus Institute, Budapest. Put to tape on the 21st of March 2024. Statement begins:
I don't want to go into details as to why I came to make this decision. It was an offer too good to be true, just what a struggling university student needed: a cheap PC with great specs and with only 2 years of usage. I know how some sellers put enticing prices on Facebook Marketplace just to drop the real deal in later messages, but that wasn't the case. The owner got his hands on "something better" and saw no use in keeping this one around so he asked for the bare minimum that would still be a deal to him.
I went to pick up the desktop, it was a city away so I drove there. It was a bit weird how creeping closer to the destination all we had were dirt roads. I live in the suburbs, I know not all city councils pay it enough attention, but these weren't those dusty solid roads. These were muddy, the tracks barely visible and overgrown with grass. No, not grass, something more- vibrant.
The roads branched off a few hundred meters from my destination, only one going in its general direction so I followed it. I reached a house, no buildings in its neighborhood, crop fields on one side, a small forest on the other, the kind that always seems way more moist than the weather would allow it and always has that smell of thick mud and insects. I could only *enjoy* that for a moment before I got hit with something else, something fleshier. It was a stench that burnt into my nostrils. I try not to judge a house by the smell, my parents were chainsmokers and I've always been more ashamed to bring friends home than it seemed they were bothered by the odor. Assuming I just met a butcher, or really just someone that keeps their own livestock I headed inside.
It felt like a hallucination, it really did. I stepped into a corridor, my lungs full of the dull yet powerful stench that covered everything. My brain felt foggy and with a headache that felt like pressure on my skull I continued inside. I was hoping to pick up the computer and get going right away, and I did my best to accomplish just that. I lifted the PC which was rather heavy and hurried back the way I came when something caught my attention. As I was putting my shoes on my brain alerted me of movement. From all around. The walls seemed to have this rhythmic pulse to them. If I wasn't at the doorstep I would've fainted, that's for sure, but I made it out to my car, telling myself it's the headache getting to me.
The drive back was nothing out of the ordinary, but that foul smell just wouldn't leave my nose. I parked, opened my boot and to no surprise the aroma oozed out of the case like a thick invisible fog, bringing back that numbing pressure that I felt earlier. I grabbed all the cleaning chemicals and similar that I could find lying around, giving it a thorough rub on the outside. I pride myself on my expertise in software, but the hardware always confused me and I never bothered to learn it. Thus I did not want to open it up, which proved to be a grave mistake.
For 6 months straight there seemed to have been no problem with the PC. It worked as intended, was just as fast as I expected and the smell was only noticeable if you got up close to sniff the case. Which I didn't. But two days ago I didn't need to either. I woke up to a strange smell. It wasn't as strong or numbing as the one I felt at the house but it certainly wasn't pleasant. We had maintenance that night, we were notified that from 10pm we should be expecting a blackout. I didn't mind, but it seemed that whatever was in my computer did not like it. I decided to give it another round of cleaning once I was done with my cup of coffee. I dressed up and went to pull out the cables on the back, but they were a lot harder to unplug than I remembered. I ripped out the one which was most limiting length-wise and I pulled the rest of the case out from under my desk. As I saw the back of the PC I had to stop myself from throwing up.
Now I'm not afraid of gore, I grew up in a generation (and the subcultures) that made it such a commonplace it's usually unamusing. On screen, at least. But I didn't expect to come face to face with a chunk of skin stretching across where my plugs should have been. The cable I ripped out laid on the floor, a dark red liquid dripping from it, staining my carpet. Same thing could be found on the back of the case. Turns out the cable wasn't just stuck, it was *integrated* into the fleshy mess that shouldn't have been there.
That's when I got a screwdriver and ripped the case open. It seemed like the only logical way to deal with whatever infested my computer and I didn't know what else I could do. The case came away like a sticker, the inside melted to a wall of human-like skin, peeling away it left a residue of perspiration on the plastic.
The flesh monster's skin seemed to have formed a block, covering its insides from all angles, pressing against the vents and pushing out through the outlets. The cord I ripped had left a nasty hole that started to scar up, but I wanted to see what I was up against and I *didn't let it*. I scraped away the scar tissue with the screwdriver and pushed it through the wound, detaching the vein that supplied my cable from the wall of skin. The case still hugging it from the outside cast a shadow that made it hard for me to see in, so I turned on my flashlight, stretching at the hole with my tool, trying to take a peek.
I saw veins running across the surface, the inside was humid and *warm*, at least warmer than room temperature but it wasn't the heat of a working human body. It was starting to cool. In the middle of the case I saw something heavy, a huge knot in the middle of the circulatory system which kept beating in a steady rhythm. It was slow, the pulse was invisible from the outside, yet it kept pushing blood through the opening, trying to close it up, but the scarring slowed down significantly from when I first ripped that cable out. It ran on electricity, it had to have been the case, the inside had a greenish tone from what I could make out, meaning that during the blackout it started rotting. The system that somehow ran like a normal computer for months started to decay, which reminded me of the smell my brain ignored from my initial shock that once again sat heavy in my lungs.
I did not reconnect it but I didn't know what to do with it either. Who would have I called? I scoured the internet to find your institute, and I left my PC to you. Past making this statement I wish not to associate myself with this case any longer.
Statement ends. First thing after reading this statement I went down to artifact storage to ask about this curio. Turns out whoever left it to us delivered it too late, the "heart" was not beating and the thing once stretched against the walls of it's case now sat collapsed and rotten in the organic section, making any other follow-up almost impossible. Looking for the flesh house also yielded no results, meaning I will put this case to rest as-is. What does keep me wondering are the intentions of the seller. Why would an avatar of the Flesh sell a piece of itself to an unsuspecting individual? There was no mention of the *flesh block* attempting to leave its case meaning there was no intention of spreading the system either. Maybe they didn't intend the buyer to possess it for so long, maybe they tried to alert us of their vicinity. But they failed. They left us with a cold trail. *sigh* Recording ends
This is episode one of my series I call MAGREDACTED, here are all the episodes out now:
The Vast The Stranger The Dark
New episodes will be posted over on @archivus !
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lurksunderthebed · 10 months
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I remember one yt comment assuming that Ghost both OG and reboot had a family of his own as in wife and kids just because he was throwing around dad jokes with Soap back and forth.
It got me thinking then; how? like sure i guess people could assume it's because he wears a mask to stay anonymous but even then it doesn't add up? He's a nobody essentially, a Ghost, he has nothing, no picture on his file, like NOTHING. It is strongly implied that he's hiding his identity for a much bigger and most likely fucked up reason. Also people in the military or undercover covert ops don't wear masks for the sake of protecting their family/loved ones only, we have to remember that not every of these guys are actually good, and this is further reinforced in the MW and other CoD franchises, so yeah, not exactly a GhostSoap topic but more about Ghost himself. Have any thoughts? Feel free to share with us, i love your analyses and interpretations!
The assumption about Ghost having a wife and kids just because he likes dad jokes is well... It's a take.
The fun thing about these sorts of headcanons is that Ghost is just as likely to have a HUSBAND and kids as well. Again it's one of those things where you can think up all sorts of secret "xyz" that Ghost could be hiding. There's nothing proving it isn't wrong, but there's also no real factual basis behind it.
When it comes to spec ops like 141 is and really any SAS/delta aligned operatives is that there's a general OPSEC on these guys already (if we're gonna use the American terminology for this). Meaning that any general public picture/info of these guys working/in uniform etc is already usually scrubbed.
The fact that Ghost is going out of his way to hide his identity means a lot more I think than just hiding love ones away. I mean there's also nothing stopping Price, Gaz or Soap to be hiding loved ones as well and they even mention it in Alejandro's case. And yet none of these guys wear a mask habitually.
Add in Ghost's obvious trust issues, how much he stands apart from people, his hesitance on being a Team and the implication he got betrayed (by someone close, prob teammates), it all paints something a bit different than just hiding an identity purely because some bad men might hunt down your secret family.
Granted, Ghost might be embroiled in some very horrible shit, so maybe the stakes are higher for him. But I think the same could be said of Price. And Price seems far more likely to have a random family cause he's actually approachable/sociable.
But again who knows.
What I can say is that Ghost cares about his appearance standing out. I agree that him wearing a mask just to stay anon actually doesn't make sense. Ghost is very memorable. If he wanted to be discreet, his get up is 'quite the opposite'. There's a mythos behind him.
His very appearance is well thought out; the guy has the most different outfits/setups out of any of the team. The skull mask is painted and hand sewn on. He accessorizes with SKELETON GLOVES too.
Ghost also had a teammate in the past that also currently wears a skull mask. It's possible that 'Ghost' might actually mean more than hiding himself, but perhaps an identity to be used for intimidation.
Perhaps like Cod: Ghost's there's a unit of Ghosts that all wore 09 ghost balaclavas in the past who were famed for being the John wicks of the codmw reboot universe?
There are so many possibilities with the inclusion of Mace and that one statement we got from the Game Dev.
But eh who knows. I could be very wrong too 🤣.
Thanks again for enjoying my analysis! 💞 And I hope this somewhat answered your question. Questions like this always take me awhile to think it through lol. But I love it 💕😅
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toronto-aces-and-aros · 2 months
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August 2024 stuff
We have a couple events coming up in August-- open to anyone who is under the aro and/or ace umbrella(s) or questioning whether they might be (whether or not you've come to any previous Toronto Aces & Aros events)
A general planning/organising meeting & social -- ASL Confirmed (RSVP suggested to [email protected])
Sunday, August 11th, 2024 (2-4:30pm) 519 Church St., room 304
And if you're interested in giving input (even if you're not planning to attend), please fill out our anonymous planning survey (by Fri. Aug 9th) to help us plan stuff:  https://forms.gle/GrbkKioQJh8GCwjaA
2. Speed-friending at Christie Pitts Park (RSVP required) -- ASL confirmed
Sunday, August 25th, 2024 (4-6:30pm) at Christie Pitts (weather permitting)
Please RSVP by August 23rd to: https://forms.gle/mUmQS53AdaVoCGek8
Full info:
Toronto Aces & Aros general organising/planning meeting & social (ASL interpreters confirmed)
Sunday, August 11, 2024 (2-4:30pm) 519 Church St., room 304
This is the space for you if you'd like to learn more about what goes on "behind the scenes" and get more involved to:
plan & host regular activities or special events
share your thoughts/feedback/input for future activities & events
facilitate workshop or other educational activities
develop educational materials, etc. 
And also finishing up with a social!
Even if you're just interested in knowing what's been going on, please join us! (open to everyone under the aromantic/aro umbrella and/or asexual/ace umbrella and people questioning whether they might be one or both-- people don't have to have attended any previous events to attend!)
To help the ASL interpreters prepare, if possible please RSVP to [email protected] (though you can still show up even if you haven't RSVPd)
And whether or not you plan to attend, please fill out our anonymous planning survey (by Fri. Aug 9th) to share your feedback:  https://forms.gle/GrbkKioQJh8GCwjaA
Accessibility:
the 519 has a large ramp to enter, power doors and elevator inside, accessible all-gender washrooms
near Wellesley station which has an elevator
we ask everyone not communicating by ASL to wear a mask (masks provided if needed)
2) Speed-friending at Christie Pitts Park (RSVP required) -- student volunteer ASL interpreters confirmed
Sunday, August 25th, 2024 (4-6:30pm) (In case of rain, this event will be rescheduled on Sept.15th)
Christie Pits Park, 750 Bloor St West, Toronto more detailed meet-up instructions will be shared closer to the event
Come join us for a structured, in-person speed-friending event to get to know other ace, aro spec, and/or questioning folks in the local community. (Note: this is not a dating event)
While there is not a limit to how many people can attend, we do need to prepare materials in advance.
Please RSVP at the link below before August 23rd. You will receive an email confirmation within a week of completing the form: https://forms.gle/mUmQS53AdaVoCGek8
Accessibility:
ASL interpreters confirmed. Please indicate on the RSVP form if you require ASL interpretation.
We will likely be sitting on the grass but can arrange for some chairs for people who require them. Please indicate on the RSVP form if you need a chair.
Christie Pits Park has accessible washrooms
Closest station is Christie which DOES NOT have an elevator; however, Bathurst station (to the east) does have an elevator.
since this event is outside, masks are optional but are welcome
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willo-carver · 2 months
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Welcome to the Willo Carver's Shop!
This is a blog for the creation of thoughtforms / willomates. A build-a-willo workshop, if you will! My own spin on headmate packs.
Unlike most of these blogs I've seen, this blog is anti-radqueer.
For anyone unfamiliar, here's the pluralpedia page for willobased plurality! Catharigenic plurals are also welcome here, as are other similar experiences (with one exception; see DNI/BYF)
Requests are OPEN!
Promo is always appreciated :)
About me, Request Guide, and BYF/DNI below the cut!
About Me
I'd like to stay mostly anonymous on this blog, but here's some basic information:
I'm keeping my name private, but you can call me Carver here! I'm 18, queer, phys disabled, a traumagenic DID system, a willogenic plural, and a few other things. Use any pronouns excluding 'they' for me!
I'm autistic, and as a result my speech can sometimes be disorganized or confusing. Please don't be afraid to ask for clarification! Somewhat related; do not use tone indicators for me, they aren't helpful and generally make me distrust what you're saying (100% a me problem).
I refer to my (and generally all, but if you don't like it lmk and I won't) Willomates as Willos, and collectively call them a Willo Tree.
How to Request
I can work off of something simple—a few words, a basic idea, an aesthetic—but then you may end up with a Willo that doesn't fully fit what you want/need. Of course, you could simply not create them, but I know some people can't fully decide that for themselves.
What I do is essentially carving out a Willo (the vast majority of the time they'll be added to my own Willo Tree, just bc that makes it so much more genuine) from whatever information you give me, and then I'll give you a detailed rundown so that you can easily create them yourself (or, if they just pop up, cool!)
I won't do factives or introjects from media
I encourage you to give me details, as many as possible! Eventually, I may make a form and list it here.
Generally, I'll include personality, identity, appearance (via a Picrew and a description), and role(s).
Anyone is welcome to use any of the Willos posted here as inspiration, or create them directly. I try to thoroughly tag each post to make finding them easier!
BYF / DNI
I have complicated opinions on syscourse. To put it plainly, I believe that traumagenic systems (those who have or had a CDD) are different from other forms of plurality, and that while there is overlap in the experiences, those differences should be respected. Both can full under the plural umbrella, but I personally use the word system exclusively for traumagenic experiences. I'm saying this as someone with DID who also has willomates! I fully believe it is possible to have both experiences, and don't care at all where your opinion lies. Even if you disagree with me on any of these points, you may interact—but do NOT bring up syscourse to me.
Those who are affiliated with "tulpamancy" are not welcome here. I don't have the right as a white westerner to decide if it's cultural appropriation, but I'd like to stick to the safe side and listen to the voices I've seen speaking out against it.
This blog is anti-radqueer. Those with paraphilias, BIID, etc. are welcome here, but I believe that the radqueer community itself and the majority of the labels it contains are harmful. Radqueers will be blocked on sight.
This blog is pro m-spec monos and other "contradictory" queer identities. I'm a gaybian, myself.
Hate will be deleted/blocked, and not engaged with. Don't bother.
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Since the Senate's Reasonable Transparency Bill was passed into law, a couple of asks have crossed my desk. Someone was curious enough to ask anonymously what my job was today. It got me wondering. What does your typical day look like, or does such a day even exist in the life of an "underling", as you seem to like calling yourself?
This, by the way, is not an official question.
Thank you for your interest, sir.
I'm actually an assistant, but have taken to using the word "underling" because it's a term prior supervisors have favored.
I usually handle tasks that require a low to mid-level security clearance and the ability to make basic analytical decisions, but which also require a sentient's touch. Things you can't give to a droid because you have to make judgment calls that aren't easily captured by an algorithm, or for which it would take longer to compile the specs for the droids to learn a one-off task than it would for a competent person to simply get it done.
Here on Ord Mantell, I initially had no regular assignments for a variety of reasons you're at least partially aware of already. I have enough experience in this sort of office that, while waiting for them to get their nunas in a row, I simply put myself to work straightening out messes that had, seemingly, fallen through the cracks. That was what led to my finding that data leak that caused so much upheaval in the office.
In my last position on Coruscant, I was part of a team that answered to a supervisor and a fluctuating number of her direct reports, in the propaganda department.
In general, we assistants helped keep the clerks on task, while also handling data, problem solving, and/or correspondence related tasks, depending on our individual strengths.
More specifically, I was one of three assistants who cataloged holos, scrubbed data after the droids had taken a pass at it, filed reports, sorted images based on the specifications (and nebulous aesthetics) of the team's artists, and assisted with compiling incoming survey data on existing outreach programs.
On a fairly regular basis, our superiors needed an assistant to accompany them to meetings, or off site, to do things like set up for a presentation (or simply to help them look important enough to have an assistant). And, of course, any assistant worth their wages has caf runs for the managers, and hand delivering files that could have been entrusted to a droid, down to a science. That just comes with the territory.
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friendshapedplant · 2 years
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So I have a liddle site
Made a webbed site for my HTML class over the summer, so I decided to post it! Hosted on everyones favorite old web hosting service neocities :D
Find Your Flag is a site for those wanting an LGBT resource that covers the "basics": common flags, identities, and terms, as well as some history on them! Good for allies and if you're new to the community trying to find a label for yourself!
It is a HUGE fucking mess, I need to do alot of work on it, but if I dont put it up and post about it I'll either never post it or forgot I posted it.
I'm aware of a couple of the things I need/want to change, both grammatically and code-wise, but if anyone wanna leave their findings or suggestions please do comment them. Below the readmore and edits/changes I need to make and things I want to add!
On the rainbow page under Progress pride there is the abomination known as "tabindexhe". Its supposed to be "taking the." This motherfucker has been in that file for like half a year and I didn't notice it for months. How
In the LGBTQIA section under Queer/Quesitoning, "ginned" is supposed to be "designed."
The A-Spec intro needs an "on" added to "someone either the"
In the Genders intro I need to pluralize "everyone."
In the Gender section under Xenogenders I need to change "social media" to "online" and remove the space in "a ssociated."
In the Misc section under Pan I misspelled anonymously and appealing. Cringe.
In the Misc section under Omni I need to add be to "The flag was meant to similar..." and change "it" to "is."
In the Misc section under Leather I need to change "wther" to "whether." (so many spelling errors in the Misc section..........)
The logo at the top takes you to home.html which is what used to be the home page. I shall make it lead to index.html
I wanna add more links to sources of info on flags, there's a few for more obscure flags but I think each flag needs one. Personally I like having sources to my info.
I don't have a source for the demisexual or frayromantic flag.
Add the old Intersex Flag to the Intersex section.
General rewording of certain sections/paragraphs.
I need to standardize my capitaliztion of words (ie I flip flop between capitalizing the first letter of identities and Not doing that)
More use of slideshows for sections with 2 or more flags maybe.
Look more into accessibility options!
I wanna change the "Contact" to "Support this site" or something along those lines to plug my ko-fi (and also have my email/Tumblr for people to submit suggestions to and stuff)
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askanaroace · 2 years
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hey! is there a sexuality (in the asexual to sexual spectrum) that's having periods of feeling your sexuality and periods being completely repulsed by anything and everything sexual? does this experience belong on the a-spec or is it regular allosexual? can it be aceflux or graysexual? I feel like I'm not fully asexual all of the time and don't want to take up space that's not mine -anonymous
I'm not sure if there's one term that encompasses this or if it would take a variety.
Aceflux is certainly one such useful term. Graysexual is another.
You might also look at abrosexual, acespike, ARCflux, and apothisexual/apothiflux.
As for whether your experience is an ace one or an allo one - that's something only you can determine. Do you relate more to your offline peers' experiences (as they are likely majority allosexual) or to asexual experiences? Does allosexual or ace feel more right to you? What do you want to consider yourself? Remember, asexual doesn't mean "never ever ever experiences any sexual feelings ever". It loosely means "low or no sexual attraction" and including folk with a general disinterest in or repulsion to sex/sexual relationships if it's useful to them.
Treat yourself like you would treat a friend. Would you tell a demisexual, who can also feel sexual attraction, that they're not asexual, even though they themselves identify as asexual? If you're here, I believe you wouldn't identity police others - and you shouldn't police yourself either. The only rule to identifying any which way is that you should identify based on how you want based on the criteria important to you. If asexual is a useful term for you, then use it! You don't have anything to prove to any of us.
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eddiebabygirldiaz · 9 months
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💌, 🧿, ☯️
💌 share something with us about an up and coming work (WIP) that has you excited
well im currently writing a sort of s7 spec fic thanks to that damn teaser and while it is buddie it's actually also bathena! this will be the first time im writing something other than buddie and i gotta say, im really enjoying writing in bobby's pov
🧿 what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to
oof jesus im not sure i really have am answer for this asdfghjkl. i definitely can get in the dumps if something ive written hasn't done well or if there's not a lot of engagement but so far ive found the best way to combat that is just taking a step back and realizing that im writing for me first and foremost and then there's my beloved friends that i share my snippets with who always scream at me and encourage me and that makes all the difference
☯️how do you think engaging with each other through tumblr, twitter, comments, kudos, creates healthy fandom experiences? How do you deal with that if you're not a social person/experience social anxiety?
aw shit im not sure how to answer this either lol. i suppose this type of engagement helps in that it gives you other people to share stuff with, whether that's creations or ramblings or theories or whatever it is. it builds this nice lil community and reminds you that you aren't alone. as for the second part, i certainly experience a lot of social anxiety but i think the general anonymity really helped me in the beginning. reaching out to other people definitely made me nervous and made me sweat but after you talk to someone you click with and can go crazy with it just kinda flows from there i guess
fic writer asks
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voidfcllen · 4 years
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FROM THE INBOX / UNPOPULAR OPINION TIME: 🔥 spiderman 
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Spectacular Spid//r-Man was literally NOT THAT GOOD and everyone needs to stop taking out their BUTT-HURT FEELINGS on the shows that came after it. As someone who grew up while Spectacular was airing, and watched EVER subsequent Spidey Show. It just WAS NOT good compared to Ultimate Spid//r-Man and Marvel’s Spid//r-Man, and you’ll never change my mind.
USM is what REALLY got me into Spiderman, and YEAH, that might just be because I was in a really bad place when I started watching it, and the show helped me GET THROUGH that. The FIRST RP BLOG I ever made was for IRON FIST from USM. USM introduced me to a lot of my now favorite marvel characters (Iron Fist, Amadeus Cho, Harry Osborn) and I owe it for that.
MSM is just GENUINELY GOOD, with great characterization, and the bonds between the characters driving the show. It’s one of the FEW Spidey shows that NEVER forgets Peter is a goddamn GENIUS In his own right. The art style is simple, and lends itself well to fights. I think the way it introduces the LARGER CAST of Spider-Characters is REALLY clever too.
OVERALL my ranking for Spidey Cartoons (that I’ve seen) are:
MSM
USM
Spectacular
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Heads up, this is going to sound really dumb and silly.
For several months I’ve started to believe I’m gray-ace/demi and I’ve been having a really hard time accepting it bc I’m hypersexual and heteroromantic. Earlier this week I took a survey and it asked for sexuality and I put asexual. I kinda regret not putting other and specifying but this is the first time I put down and admitted to being ace spec. I feel ridiculous cause it was an anonymous survey and I didn’t even specify what ace I believe I am but clicking the asexual answer was made me so nervous but happy at the same time.
Hey soemtimes dumb and silly things are the best parts of life! I'm glad that it made yo happy, and I'm happy for you in general!
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julian day headcanons 📆
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theme-related
the big concepts: cycles, order, the human need to establish order in a chaotic universe, commemoration, seeking patterns, rituals
according to julian, calendars and cycles allow us to feel some control over the yawning void of time, breaking its enormity into 365 bite-sized pieces.
his favorite cycles are holidays, the 7 days of a week, the 12 months, the seasons, the farming cycle (seeding, harvesting, etc) and like moons with special names and shit, equinoxes, leap years, anniversaries, the lunar cycle, the advent, the zodiac, and saint days
other favorite concepts: birthdays, new years’ resolutions, the origins of holidays, finity (a calendar after all is just one year), memento mori ⌛️
interested as shit in alternative calendars like precolumbian calendars, eastern/lunar, and egyptian
backstory
(canon from long halloween) orphan, exploited by the system and by foster parents
surrendered anonymously by his birth parents on february 12, hence named for St. Julian whose feast day is feb 12
assigned a birthday of february 1 but doesn’t consider this his actual birthday; in his opinion his birthday is unknown which bothers yet intrigues him
was fostered at one point by the wealthy but detached Day family for tax breaks, and they’re the ones who kept him locked up for long stretches before he was eventually returned to the system
the Days were catholic and he would pass the time by reading the book of saints’ feast days he found in their house. also woe religious trauma be upon ye
spent a good few years on the streets as a runaway between homes. eventually ended up in juvenile detention for stealing, where he spent a lot of time in solitary confinement
there was like 10 solid years between when he turned 18 and when he started doing crime where he was alright, struggling financially but getting along
miscellaneous
he/they
6’0”, almost as tall as batman. (i rlly enjoy about him that he’s one of few batman rogues (and characters in general) whose appearance don’t correspond to their theme i.e. riddler is small and wiry and his power is intellectual, scarecrow is gangly and skeletal and his power is spookiness. calendar man is kinda esoteric and conceptual and he’s (in some adaptations) great big for no particular reason. i love how his voice catches you off guard). haven’t decided on a preference for him between buff but sorta toned like he was a skinny kid who decided to work out while he was in arkham, or bulky with a sort of caber-tossing physique of both strength and fat. both are good.
alopecia areata, started losing his hair at around ten and it was gone by 13.
ocd. counts stuff not exactly compulsively but to relax and pass the time, sometimes unconsciously. favorite numbers, naturally, are 4, 7, 12, 28, 30, 31, 52 and 365.
says he isn’t motivated by revenge but by a desire to enlighten people. (lying and/or wrong) (he is motivated by revenge)
more jealous, petty, emotional than he likes to admit to himself or others
he has hobbies other than calendars that aren’t mentioned because they’re not relevant to batman’s journey. he likes film, especially old movies (this is me projecting), botany and paleontology
gay but flirts with women but not in a genuine way; he’s just being polite and debonair. like the guy who’ll kiss an old lady on the hand and ask if the woman who’s clearly her daughter is her sister, that kind of old-world charm. i’ll hear bi as well i’m not picky
ace spec (grey)
likes to take very good care of his appearance. being that he doesn’t have any hair and that he’s often in a uniform, there isn’t that much he can do to impact how he looks in arkham, so he takes what control he can by growing out his nails and then filing them round, and by doin a lil makeup
top 2 most requested items in arkham are calendars and eyeliner
doesn’t generally wear the complimentary arkham assigned grippy socks - being barefoot makes him feel more connected/grounded. plus he read online it’s good for your health
astrology bitch that has everyone’s charts memorized. thinks astrology is ridiculous and made up but this is also his relationship with all holidays and date systems so he still loves astrology. philosophically intriguing to him. especially loves bothering the Staunchly anti astrology rogues with it (riddler.)
bit of a history buff who knows the significant historical events from every date in the year. gotham history and world history
likes quoting ‘thirty days hath september’ but thinks, and readily admits, that it’s a very sloppy rhyme.
one on one, he will small talk. especially if you’re in a hurry and he wants to be annoying. but in a group setting, like a team-up, he’s usually the one who does not talk until he has something important to say.
actively trained himself out of his natural jersey accent because he thought that it, combined with his looks, made him come across as a mook. speaks softly and in a tiny bit of a falsetto to counteract his intimidating build. picked up a bit of a trans atlantic accent from film. difficult to provoke but when he wants to raise his voice he doesn’t, like, shout or change his tone, he just, like, increases the volume of his usual voice
relationships
actively friends with: catwoman, mr freeze (freeze keeps everyone at a distance but CM holds him in high esteem), ivy, harley, ragdoll, toymaker
him and scarecrow are passive aggressive. they are polite and civil but it takes like one sentence to provoke them to physical violence. they squabble over halloween. him and anarky also fight over nov 5. him and music meister don’t fight over anything, they just hate each others’ vibes. him and zsasz can be alopecia buddies but i hesitate to suggest they actually like each other.
he’s worked with joker once or twice but that does not mean he likes him, also has a deep distaste for professor pyg. he has nothing but respect for bane but bane thinks he’s silly.
i love when jokey/forgotten rogues are in a gang. like he should be pals with tally man. square and sharp. there’s one person on here who ships him with eraser and like that’s just fine. me if i had to pick a ship i’d say maybe mr bloom or maybe polka dot man. there’s a couple of riddlers that’d like him for being Stronk but also Intellectual like maybe dano or carrey
he’s in the arkham theater troupe with clayface and babydoll but he does costumes (who wouldn’t want a costume by the guy who made calendar man’s costume shdjdjs)
notes: i love that TLH tried so hard to make calendar man cool and kind of succeeded? like what seemed like an objectively stupid theme can actually be kinda cool depending how you play it. i stuck with the TLH movie for most of my hcs for “my” version of him but versions that are 1) small 2) a disaster (B:TBATB, TLH comic, etc). i just think it’s funny to have calendar man of all people have a tiny bit of class. mix it up
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atlafan · 4 years
Text
Office Neighbors - Part One
a/n: OKAY! this is my new love, professor!Harry x professor!Y/N. This is a slow burn, so buckle up because it’s going to be a longgggg ride. enjoy! (also reblogs/feedback is super helpful) not proofread
warnings:none yet...I suppose some fluff? slight angst?? 
words: 20K
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You were all cozied up in bed, in a cocoon of blankets. Even though it was August, your apartment had central air, and it was glorious. You loved nothing more than practically sleeping in a burrito of blankets year round. It was a new place to go along with your new job.
Y/F/N Y/L/N, Adjunct Professor, Communication Department: that was your new title. You had your master’s degree, and now you could finally move on to get your PhD. Your specialization was social media and the like, but you also had background in rhetoric and film. The few faculty that served on your search committee were quite impressed with the research you had already started conducting. Your main research was about the pros and cons of anonymity online. The school was a perfect fit. You would be teaching a couple of the intro courses for the major, and some special topics courses.
Today was faculty orientation. You would be given yet another tour of the university, go through some technology workshops, and be shown to your office. You were excited because you hadn’t been able to meet all of your faculty yet, and you’d be going to your first faculty meeting towards the end of the day.
You check your phone and see that it’s going to be in the mid 80’s today. You sigh and get up to start your morning routine. Once your face is washed and your teeth are brushed, you rummage through your closet to see what would be the most appropriate thing to wear. A flowy dress, in theory, would be a good idea, but the idea of sweating between your legs didn’t sound all that great. You settle on a pair of emerald green shorts that fall just above your knee, perfectly appropriate length for school. Plus, they were just a cute pair of shorts in general. You pair it with a white short-sleeve blouse, and tuck it into the shorts to show the shape of your body. Next, you needed to tackle your hair. You could leave it down, but sweat and humidity were not your friends. You had gotten into the habit of parting your hair down the middle more, you were twenty-six now it was okay to go with your natural part. You thought it made you look more adult, whatever that meant. So, you part it, and pull up each side to make pig tails, then you create a bun on each side. You looked professional, but fun. Just the vibe you were going for. You only apply a little makeup, in fear of it melting off of you. You slip on a pair of white tennis shoes for comfort, gather your laptop and other things, and head out.
Rolling through Dunkin Donuts, you treat yourself with a vanilla late instead of your usual, it was your first day after all. You’re not feeling too hungry yet, so you don’t get anything to eat. A college habit that just hasn’t died yet: barely eating anything until the late afternoon. You park at the building where your last meeting of the day will be, always thinking ahead. You sip on your coffee and enjoy your stroll across the beautiful campus to your first meeting of the day. There were a few people in the classroom, and you shyly smile and wave as you take a seat.
Policies and procedures are talked about after everyone in the cohort introduces themselves. You notice that you’re the only CM hire, there were three math hires, two for history, one for CS, two for art, and two for CJ. Some seemed to be around your age, and other seemed older. Everyone was friendly enough. You observed everyone’s posture and body language. You couldn’t help it, you were practically trained to read rooms and people.
The campus tour isn’t anything new. This was about the fifth time you had been walked around by some students to show you where things were, but it was nice to get outside for a good walk. You’re given a break for lunch, and you opt to eat outside at one of the open picnic benches. You notice that most people wanted to eat alone. It was a lot of social time, you yourself didn’t mind the break from talking and sharing.
After lunch are the technology workshops, making sure your account was set up and that you knew how to edit your courses in moodle. It wasn’t terribly difficult, but it was something everyone had to do. Luckily, as a first year professor, you wouldn’t be given any advisees. That you were thankful for. You had taught before, of course, and you loved helping students, but you wanted to make sure you had a good handle on the curriculum before telling students what they should be taking for courses.
Around 3PM a student comes to show you to your academic building, and escort you to your new office before your faculty meeting. There’s a bit of chit chat between the two of you before they open the door to the overly hot building. You cough when you first enter from the humidity.
“Don’t worry, it’s only like this for the first couple of weeks.” She says and you nod.
She guides you straight in where the communication lounge was. Wow, an entire lounge, you think to yourself. There were a few couches and three offices on the main level. A flat screen TV projecting student projects across from one of the couches. She takes you down a spiral staircase where there were four other offices, one vacant for you. There were two computer clusters, a projects and screen, and more couches. You already liked that it seemed to be an interactive space for students.
“Looks like you got the one with the window.” She smiles. “Have a nice day.”
“Thank you so much.” You beam at the student that you’ll probably never see again.
The door was open for you, and two sets of keys were sitting on your desk. The office was bare just waiting for your interior design ideas to be splashed all over it. Your desk was L-shaped with two monitors and a laptop plugged into a docking station. At least you didn’t have to wait to be given your school sanctioned computer. You smile when you see that you were given a Mac as requested. You look at your one window and take a picture so you could find curtains for it. You open and close all of drawers just to make sure there was nothing left behind inside the desk. There were two seats on the other side of the desk for what you would assume would be for student meetings. You could get better ones. You also definitely had room for a small couch, a love seat perhaps.
“Well, look at that, I finally got a new neighbor.”
You jump slightly and turn around. There were a couple of reasons that you were slightly started. Whoever it was that was speaking to you had a deep, gravel-like voice, and they had a British accent. Not totally uncommon at a university, but still something you weren’t expecting. You were also started because no one else was downstairs with you. As you turn around, your cheeks flush when you take in the man with the toothy smile before you.
He was wearing a loose pair of jeans with a couple of rips in them, beaten up white sneakers with different color laces, and a light blue t-shirt. You barely have time to take in his tattoos, or the thick rim of his glasses before he speaks again.
“I’m so sorry, did I startle you?”
“Only slightly.” You give him a half smile. “I’m Y/N.” She extends her hand out to him and he takes it, shaking it gently.
“I’m Harry.”
“Ah! Dr. Styles, yeah. You were away when all of my interviews were happening.”
“Yes, I was away at a conference, but I heard great things. And please, just call me Harry. We’re not a very formal group.” He smirks.
“So, your office is the one next to mine?”
“That’s right.” He nods towards it, and you step out to look at his door.
Dr. Harry Styles, PhD was on his door along with a paper with his office hours printed on it.
“You’re lucky you got one with a window right away, I’m surprised no one wanted to snatch it up. The two across from us don’t have windows, but maybe some people don’t really care about that. I happen to enjoy looking out the window to see what’s happening when my eyes need a rest from the screen.”
You nod your head and peep inside his office. He had put his desk in the back corner of the room. So if students were to come see him, his back would be to them and they could easily see whatever he was doing on the computer, but you notice he also has a corner set up with a few chairs and around coffee table. Perhaps he’s able to discuss things easier this way. Many ideas pop into your head about how you might like to set things up.
“There’s a really great consignment shop downtown with quality furniture for cheap. That’s where I got those that table and chairs.”
“Thanks.” You squint at the three diplomas framed one the wall, and a couple of certifications as well. He had a small shelf with a couple of awards too. “What’s your PhD in?”
“At the base level, Media Studies, but my master’s was in Literary Dynamics. I’m a bit of a book worm as you can see.” He points to the bookshelf full of worn books and you smile. “Got my doctorate here, same as you’re doing, and they offered me a tenure position. Been here about six years total now, I love it.”
You think for a moment to try to put together how old he might be. There was a boyishness to his features, but he also had crinkles around his eyes and a few specs of grey in his hair. Then again, so did you. You greyed early, not that anyone would know since you get highlights in your hair.
“I turn thirty-two in February, if that’s what you were wondering.”
“Oh…I wasn’t, um, I-“
“It’s okay.” He chuckles. “Shall we head up to the faculty meeting? They sent me down here to get you.”
“Yeah, let’s get to it.” You quickly grab your laptop and follow him up the spiral staircase, trying not to look at his butt too much.
He leads you down a hall to a room used for meetings. A large table with people sitting around it casually, a few you recognize from your search committee.
“Y/N!” Lisa, the department chair, exclaims. “Glad Harry found you, come in.” Everyone turns their attention towards you and you smile. You sit down, and Harry goes to sit at the other end of the table. “Right, so let’s go round the table to introduce ourselves to Y/N. Let’s tell her what courses we all teach as well. I’m Lisa, obviously, I teach Game Design and Senior Seminar. I used to teach more, but so it goes when you’re the department chair.”
“Hi, Y/N, I’m Andre, I teach Communication Theory, Digital Media in the New Age, and Journalism.”
“I’m Mateo, good to see you again.” He smiles and you nod. “I teach Tech Comm, Intercultural Communication, and Strategic Communication.”
“I’m Sandra, I teach Global Perspectives in the Media, Film and Video Production Techniques, and basically any other film production courses.” She laughs.
“I’m Harry.” He gives you that same toothy smile. “I teach Communication, Media, and Wellness, Media Effects, Analyzing Screen Media, Literature into Film, and The Craft of Screenwriting.”
“I’m Janette, I teach Philosophy of Communication, Advanced Composition, and Interactive Web Communication.”
“Wonderful, thank you everyone. Don’t worry, Y/N, our admin Lucas will email you all of this info if he hasn’t already.”
“That’s alright, thank you.” She smiles.
“Why don’t you tell everyone what courses you’ll be teaching this fall and spring?”
“Well, this fall I’ll be teaching Communication and Media Studies, Media and Cultural Studies, and Social Media: Technology and Culture. Then in the spring I’ll teach the two intro courses, along with Professional Social Media, and Rhetoric and Semiotics.”
“We’re so happy to have you aboard.” Lisa smiles.
Lisa goes on to explain any policy or curriculum changes. Y/N notices how casual the group is, and also how diverse the group is. It was nice to see.
“Now, I know it’s your first day, and you just moved to the area…feel free to say no, but we’re all headed downtown to the pub for dinner if you’d like to join us.” Lisa says at the end of the meeting.
“That would be great! I haven’t gotten the chance to eat downtown much.”
“Oh, you’ll love the pub.” Sandra says. “Best nachos I’ve ever had.”
You smile and stand with everyone. You notice that everyone just simply walks downtown. You run to your car quickly to drop her bag off, and continues the walk. You all go in and grab a table for seven. You slide into the booth and Harry slides in next to you, followed by Janette and Sandra. Lisa, Mateo, and Andre all sit in the chairs across from you. You weren’t sure if you felt comfortable drinking in front of your colleagues just yet, but you order a vodka-tonic anyways just to be social.
“Sandra’s right, they do have the best nachos here.” Lisa says. “Should we just get a couple of orders of that? We could do one with chicken and one without.”
“I can just pick it off, don’t be silly.” Harry says.
“I, uh , don’t eat meat either, and I can also just pick it off.” You speak up.
“Oh, please.” Lisa scoffs. “We can get one with and one without, no problem.”
“You don’t eat meat?” Harry turns to you slightly.
“Um, no.” He was very close to you, and you weren’t sure how you felt about it. You just met him. You take a sip of your drink so your mouth doesn’t feel so dry. “My doctor told me to cut out red meat, and then I got sick of chicken and stuff, so I just cut it all out.” You shrug.
“Things were sort of the same with me, I just didn’t like how it made me feel after eating it. There’s other ways to get protein. I eat a lot of beans and nuts.”
“Right.” You were curious as to why he was being so open with you.
“Course, I feel like I’m starved half the time, don’t know if that happens to you, but I always keep granola bars in my office if you ever need one.”
“Oh! Um, thank you. Are we allowed to bring mini fridges? I’m really into overnight oats right now, so if I could just leave that stuff in there…”
“We are! It can’t be one of those huge ones though, it’s gotta be one of those ones that looks like a cube.” Harry makes a fake outlines of a box with his fingers. The waitress comes over and takes the orders for the nachos. “Excuse me, love, could I also get a separate order of chicken fingers and fries to go?”
The waitress nods and Harry smiles at her. You raise an eyebrow at him.
“Got someone at home who requested it.” He says before turning his attention to the other conversations at the table.
You wondered whom might me home waiting for him. A wife, a girlfriend…boyfriend? Harry wore a lot of rings, and his nails were painted, but a lot of men were doing that these days so you didn’t want to make any assumptions.
“So, Y/N, where’s home for you?” Andre asks.
“Oh, I’m from Boston originally.”
“Wow! And you moved up here to the mountains. Do you miss the hustle and bustle yet?”
“Not yet, I sort of don’t mind the quiet, although, when I first moved I had trouble falling asleep at night. It was almost too quiet.” You laugh. “But I’ve gotten more used to it. I’m in a great little apartment building, nice neighborhood. I think there are some grad students that I’m neighbors with.”
“Do you going hiking at all?” Mateo asks. “There are some great trails around here.”
“I haven’t gone yet, but I’d certainly be willing to give it a go.”
“We usually all go together before the semester starts.” Lisa says. It surprised you at how close everyone seemed. All different people of different ages. “There’s this really easy mountain about twenty minutes from campus with a beautiful view of the lakes region.”
“Well, I’ll certainly give it a go. Just let me know when.” You smile.
Sandra was absolutely right, the nachos were incredible. Lots of layers of chips and cheese, fresh veggies and guacamole, not to mention the sour cream and salsa. Everyone squares up their checks and heads out. Harry grabs his to go order from the bar. The sun was just barely setting, god, you loved August.
“I parked in the same lot as you, mind if I walk back up with you?” Harry asks after you all say goodnight.
“Not at all.” You smile.
“So, how was the first day? Is your brain ready to explode?”
“Only a little. I think if I take in anymore new information today I’ll pop.” Harry chuckles at that.
“I remember my faculty orientation.” He smirks and shakes his head. “I think I wore a suit, if you can believe it.”
“I’m sure you clean up really well.” You say playfully and he rolls his eyes.
“Well, you’re right about that, but it was super embarrassing at the time. No one told me how casual it was.”
“A little initiation ritual perhaps.”
“Maybe.” He looks at her. “I like your little, um, what do you call those.”
“Oh! My buns?”
“Yeah! Didn’t know if you’d still call them that, or poofs, or something.”
“Poof works.” You chuckle. “I wasn’t sure how humid it was going to be so I just did it up like that. They’re nice for keeping pens or pencils in.”
“Brilliant.” He smiles and reaches his car. “Well, I hope you enjoyed your first day. Feel free to email me if you have any questions. I know being new the area and campus can be overwhelming.”
“Thanks, I appreciate that.” You nod and get into your own car. You take a deep breath as you drive away. “I can do this.” You tell yourself. You enjoyed how friendly everyone was, you could definitely see yourself fitting in with everyone.
//
Harry gets home soon after he leaves campus, only living about fifteen minutes away. He owned a quaint ranch-style home.
“Andy, I’m home, bud!” He yells out. “Got your dinner.” He walks into the living room and sees his son playing video games. “Please don’t tell me you played all day…”
“Hey, dad.” He pauses the game and takes the to go box from Harry. “No, I didn’t play all day.” He rolls his eyes. “I went to the skate park at with Brandon, and then we swam in his pool, remember?”
“Right, I’ll have to say thanks to his parents.” Harry sits down on the couch and sighs.
“Tired?” Andy asks with his mouth full.
“Yeah, it was just a day full of meetings, then we all had dinner. Being social is draining.” He laughs. “How’s the chicken, good?”
“Mhm.”
“Let me get you some napkins…water?”
“Yes, please.”
Harry nods to his son. Harry usually got to be with his son all summer, but this year Andy asked to stay for the school year. It was a rather large discussion that Harry had to have with him and Andy’s mother, who Harry wasn’t on bad terms with, but he certainly didn’t live the one on one chat.
“I just feel like he didn’t get this idea on his own.” She whispered to him in the kitchen.
“I swear I didn’t put the idea in his head. He just asked me out of the blue if he could be enrolled at the middle school. He’s going into fifth grade, maybe he wants a fresh start. He has good friends here, Paige.”
“He has good friends at home too…” She sighs. “I just…so what, now I only get to see him on weekends? I’m his mother, Harry.”
“And I’m his father.”
“You get him for the entire summer.”
“You know it’s not enough time with him. I miss him a lot during the school year.” He drums his fingers on the kitchen counter. “Do you think…I mean…your boyfriend moved in with you, right? Do you think he feels uncomfortable with the change?”
“I don’t know, when Noah and I spoke with him about it he said he was fine with it. He was used to him sleeping over anyways. He’s knowing him for two years now, it’s not that weird.”
“I didn’t say it was weird, I’m talking about comfort. Maybe he just doesn’t want to share his space. It’s not just Noah that moved in, he has a daughter too…”
“Andy and Rachel get along really well. She’s only a year younger than he is.” She sighs again. “I don’t want him thinking he’s being replaced, Harry. What if he doesn’t want to come back into my life once he’s with you all the time?”
“I don’t think that could happen, I’ll make sure it doesn’t.”
“And you’d be able to handle him all year long?”
“Sure, I’d have to change when I’m offering my classes so I’m home at a reasonable time, but I can make it work.” He rubs the back of his neck. “I could always send him home to you if I can’t be around anyways, like how you do with me.”
“Right.” She looks into the living room where Andy had his headphones in, and then back to Harry. “That’s my little baby in there. How can I let him go?”
“You’re not letting him go, you’re letting him grow up a bit. Why don’t we tell him we’ll see how this year goes, and then we can talk more seriously about custody and all that?”
“Alright, yeah, that seems fair.”
“You only live thirty minutes away, I could always drop him off for dinner sometimes, or-“
“Yeah.” She nods. “Well, um, let’s go talk with him then.”
That conversation happened after the July 4th holiday. Andy went home every other weekend to his mother’s, and Harry always talked with him about how his time with her was. Andy would always say that had a great time. He really did just like his friends better where Harry lived, and he was getting older. Maybe he just wanted to live with his dad.
“Alright.” Harry hands him the napkins and water. “Shall we watch a movie and then get you ready for bed?”
“I’m not a baby.” He scoffs.
“You are though, you’ll always be my baby.”
“Dad.” Andy groans. “Don’t be gross.”
“Can’t help it, you’re too stinkin’ cute.”
“Please stop before I barf up my chicken.”
Harry laughs and switches the TV to Netflix. Andy looked a lot like Harry in that he had curly hair and green eyes. He had his mother’s button nose and freckles. Andy liked dressing in basketball shorts and t-shirts, but he also like using a scrunchie or bandana to keep his hair off his face the way Harry did. It was cute.
“Am I going to mum’s this weekend?”
“You are, my darling.” Harry sips on a beer while lounging on the couch during the movie. “That alright?”
“Course.” He shrugs. “I actually have a new skate trick to show Rachel.”
“Do you to go boarding together?”
“Sometimes. She’s better on her skates, though.” He munches on some popcorn. “I kinda like going there on Friday nights because her and Noah go to temple on Saturday mornings, so mum and I get up late and make breakfast together.”
“Good, I’m glad you get that quality time together. I hope you’re paying attention to the culture that Rachel and Noah are bringing into your life, though. She’ll probably have a Bat Mitzvah someday and you’ll have this big party to go to.”
“Dad?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you ever…I mean…it’s sort of weird that you like Noah…”
“Is it?” Harry sits up. “I’ve got no problem with him. He’s a nice guy, takes care of your mum.”
“That’s just it, I have friends with divorced parents and they-“
“Well, mum and I aren’t divorced, Andy, you know that. We never got married.”
“Even still…”
“We wanted to do right by you can be good co-parents. I’d be a real brat if I was rude to him.”
“How come you and mum never got married?”
Harry nearly chokes on his drink. He clears his throat and pauses the movie. Andy never really asked questions like this. He never even saw Harry and Paige as a couple, he never knew them together.
“Um…well…we were really young when you were born. I was twenty when we found out about you, and I was twenty-one when you born, I was just barely finishing school when you came along. Your mum was a year ahead of me, so luckily she got her degree before you were born.”
“Were you together then?”
“Yeah.” Harry nods. “Mum and I dated for about two years in undergrad, and then…well…we found out about you, and we were nervous, but excited.”
“But you didn’t want to get married?”
“I asked her, but she said no.”
“Why?”
“She thought I only wanted to marry her because she was pregnant.” He sighs. “Things like that sort of get complicated when you’re older. I also had a lot going on for school, and she didn’t want me to put my career on hold, she already had a full time job and all that. We tried to make things work, but we both realized a relationship shouldn’t be made to work because of…a baby. We both love you very much, Andy, make no mistake about that, but mum and I make better friends than a couple, I can assure you.”
“Oh.”
“Do you wish we were together sometimes?”
“Sometimes.” He nods. “But only because I hate going back and forth.”
“I’m sorry.” He sighs. “We live as close to each other as we can.”
“I know.” He furrows his brows. “I just don’t like when Noah acts like he’s my dad because he’s not, you are.”
“True, but you should still be respectful. Rachel lives there full time too, so-“
“I can’t stand that either, honestly.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know…ugh, she was on the phone with one of her friends and she referred to me as her brother. Not even step-brother, brother! I’m not her brother.” He huffs.
“Andy…come here.” His son gets up and sits next to him. Harry puts an arm around him and holds him close. “You’re going through a lot of change right now, huh?”
“I guess.” He looks up at Harry. “I think Noah’s gonna ask mum to marry her…which I guess is nice for her, but I’d rather just be with you.”
“You are with me.”
“Permanently, though. I’ve felt better just going over on the weekends, it’s plenty.”
“Mum and I said we’d see how this year at school goes, and then we could decide. I want you here, but I have to respect what she wants too.” He smiles down at him. “Poor you, having two parents who just love you so much.” He kisses his forehead.
“Blegh!” He wipes the spit from his forehead away. “What is wrong with you?” He gets up and goes back to his own seat.
“What? A father can’t love on his son anymore just because he’s in the double digits?”
“Exactly, press play.”
Harry laughs and shakes his head as he starts the movie back up.
//
Your semester was off to a great start. You got your office decorated nicely, and you were able to make it a cozy and homey space, which was good because you spent a lot of late nights there. Balancing teaching multiple sections of three different classes while also making time for research was proving to be a little difficult. Sometimes students were hanging out in the lounge while you were working, so you didn’t feel truly alone.
You were on an incredible team. You met bi-weekly with Lisa just for wellness check ins. She knew how overwhelming the first year could be, and she recommended chatting with Harry. He was the last one to go through all of it, so he would have the best tips. Harry was often out of the building by 3PM most days. He held virtual office hours from his home office. You weren’t entirely sure why he always needed to get home so early. Well, you weren’t sure until the answer slapped you in the face.
“And this is my new neighbor, Y/N.” You hear him say as he knocks on your door. “Got a second?”
“Um…sure.” You stand up and see a young boy with Harry.
“Y/N, this is my son, Andy. He had a half day from school today, so he’s hanging out until it’s time to go home.”
“Oh! Hi, Andy. It’s nice to meet you.” You had foolishly assumed the picture of Harry holding a baby on his desk was a nephew or something since he himself looked so young in the photo.
“Nice to meet you too.” He mumbles.
“What grade are you in?”
“Fifth.”
“Oh, so you just started middle school? How’s that going?”
“Okay, I guess.” He shrugs. “Dad, can I go get a snack at the grille?”
“Sure.” Harry fishes for his wallet and hands Andy a ten dollar bill. “Don’t pig out though, I want you to be hungry for dinner.”
“Okay.” He walks away from them and Harry shakes his head with a smile.
“He’s a human disposal right now.”
“I…didn’t know you had a son.” You say awkwardly.
“Yeah! Yikes, have I not mentioned him before now?” You shake your head no. “Guess that means we haven’t spent enough time together then.” You blush slightly and Harry clears his throat, then pushes his glasses up his nose. “He, um, just turned ten in May…sort of had him young.”
“I see.”
“This is his first time being with me during the school year. He wanted to give this school system a try, couldn’t say no to that.”
“Oh…um…so his mom…?” You didn’t want to pry too much. Harry wore a lot of rings so you weren’t sure if he was married or not.
“She lives about thirty minutes away, closer to the lakes. She’s a para at a law office, does well for herself. We were college sweethearts, but it didn’t work out.” He shrugs and you nod. “She’s got a serious boyfriend and he has a daughter a year younger than Andy. I think he felt like his personal space was closing in on him, so he asked to live with me. I usually just get him for the summer when I’m not teaching, it’s been great having him around more.”
“He has your eyes.” You wanted smack your forehead for making such a weird comment.
“He does! One of the first things I noticed about him when they stopped being that weird, dark color babies have when they’re first born.” You simply nod your head. “Well, I’ve taken up a lot of your time…um…let’s plan a lunch or something sometime soon. I’d love to know how your classes are going. I know it can’t be easy teaching the intro courses.”
“I’m doing well with it, actually. I taught a lot of the first-year courses at my previous institution. I’ve just been more bogged down with my research than anything else.”
“I’d like to hear more about that too, if that’s alright. Didn’t get to hear about like everyone else since I was gone during your interviews.”
“Sure, we could do lunch sometime then.” Harry smiles at that.
“Great. You know, we get together to do a monthly game night with the faculty from the English department. It’s in a couple of weeks, I hope you’ll come. A lot of their classes double count within our major, so it would be good for you to meet them.”
“Yeah, just let me know when it is. I enjoyed the hike a couple weeks ago.”
“I was pissed I missed that.” Harry groans. “I had to take Andy-“
“Dad.” Andy comes back, handing Harry his change. He was biting into a BLT.
“Thank you, let’s go into my office, yeah? You’ve got some homework that needs to get done.”
“Fine.” He goes into Harry’s office with a huff.
“Anyways, I’ll let you know when the game night is.”
“Okay, thanks.” You smile at each other and go back to sit down in your office.
He had a kid, a ten-year-old…holy shit. You couldn’t imagine going through your master’s and doctoral program while also raising a child. Good for him, you think.  Andy was a pretty cute kid, a mop of curls, just like his dad.
//
You gave yourself Saturdays off. Saturdays were for sleeping in, doing a quick pilates workout, grocery shopping, laundry and whatever other chores you may have. Saturdays were for curling up on the sofa with a cup of tea and good movie. Saturday nights were for you and Janette, who you have become pretty close with, to go have drinks.
“You need to find someone to bring home with you tonight.” Janette says, as you both begin your second drinks of the evening.
“Oh stop.” You laugh. “I don’t think I have the energy to pretend to be into someone enough to fuck them.” She rolls her eyes at you. “So…what’s this I hear about a game night with the English department?”
“Oh! It’s so much fun. Once a month someone different hosts it. Sometimes we play board games, sometimes it’s card games, one time we even played Heads Up, that was a hoot.” She giggles. “You should definitely come, Lisa’s hosting the next one. Her house is huge and has a beautiful view of the lakes and mountains.”
“I think I might, yeah.”
“Who told you about it? I think Lucas was planning to add you to the email about it.”
“Oh, Harry mentioned it the other day. He said it would be good for me to get to know the other faculty.”
“He’s certainly right about that.”
“I met his son…”
“Andy was in the office! Damn, I try to keep candy in my office for him. He’s so sweet. He was just a little guy when Harry started, can’t believe he’s in middle school.”
“Yeah, he was really polite. Sort of closed off at the same time.”
“Harry seems to think he’s become more self-aware. It’s a big deal for him to want to live with Harry year round.” She sips her drink. “Shouldn’t gossip too much about it though.”
“Right.” You sip your own drink.
“The students seem to like you so far, we’ve all heard good things from our advisees.”
“Really?! That means a lot.”
“Your teaching must speak for itself.”
“Students are always in the downstairs lounge, it’s nice to chat with them sometimes. They always seem to be visiting Harry. Andre and Sandra are down with us too, and they don’t have as many frequent flyers.”
“I know you’re new and all, but I didn’t think you were naïve.” She chuckles.
“What do you mean?”
“Harry perfectly fits the hot teacher trope, Y/N. He’s slightly mysterious with his tattoos and his nail polish, but still totally approachable. He’s dorky, but funny. He’s got a little muscle on him, but he’s not terribly intimidating, plus he’s fucking brilliant. You should sit in on his Literature and Film class.”
“One might think you have a crush on him from the way you speak about him.” You tease her.
“One would have to be straight, my dear.” She winks at you, and you laugh a little too loud. “However, I know an attractive man when I see one. Girls swoon over him all the time. It was really bad when he first started because he was a little closer in age with students, things have calmed down considerably though.”
“He dresses nicely too, I like his style.”
“It’s a little out there, but it works for him.”
“Sometimes I can smell the nail polish remover from my office.” You giggle. “He really hates when they’re chipped, huh?”
“God, you have no idea. Sometimes in the faculty meetings I’ll catch him chipping away at, next time I see him they’re freshly painted again.”
You take an uber home after having four drinks with your friend. You gossiped about some other people, Harry didn’t remain the topic of conversation for long. You get home and strip yourself of your clothes, and wash up before getting into your blanket burrito.
//
Sundays were for getting a head start on the week. Sometimes you worked from your office at home, but today you forgot something at your office at work, so you decide to just grab all your things and work from your office for the day. You were making some progress on your research and you wanted to keep riding the wave you were on.
You had a tie-dye t-shirt on under your coat that had a picture of Goofy on it, and a pair of jeans on. You didn’t need to be super dressed up for some weekend work. No one was usually in the building anyways. You get some up and put some music on while you do some reading and highlighting.
“Hey! Look who it is.”
“Jesus!” You flinch and look up. “Scared the shit out of me, Harry.”
“Sorry about that.” He rubs the back of his neck. “You’re a tad jumpy.”
“Hard not to be when you’re always coming out of nowhere.” You turn your music down and stand up to walk over to him, crossing your arms over your stupid shirt. “What are you doing here?”
“Well, Andy’s with his mum this weekend, and I needed a change of scenery from the home office, so I thought I’d come here.”
“Oh.”
He looks you up and down and smiles.
“Is Goofy your favorite?”
“Huh?”
“Your shirt.” He points to it. “Personally, I’m partial to Mickey Mouse, but Goofy’s fun.”
“This is a really old shirt, I did laundry yesterday so this is what I was left with.”
“Ah…and I suppose you weren’t expecting to bump into your colleague.”
“Correct.”
“Well, I think it’s proper cute, so no worries, I won’t make fun.” He winks and goes into his own office.
You feel your cheek and it’s considerably warmer than it was from before he got there. You shake your head and return to your seat, opting to put your headphones in to not disturb him. Just as you’re getting going in the zone again, he comes into your office and plops down on one of the reupholstered chairs you had on the other side of your desk.
“Yes?” You ask, taking your headphones out.
“I want you to come observe my wellness class this week.”
“Why?”
“Because I think you could use some time to distress. You don’t teach any 8AM’s, right?”
“No…um…what makes you think I need to distress?”
“You just look like you’re carrying a lot of tension. It’s a great class. We chat, we meditate. Sometimes students fall asleep, but I’ve told them it’s okay. If their bodies are telling them they need sleep, then they should sleep. We do a bit of yoga as well. Plus, I just think it would be good for you to observe me.”
“I was told your literature class would be fun to observe, couldn’t I do that instead?”
“And let you get out of a bit of meditation?” He scoffs. “I don’t think so, sister.” You laugh at that.
“Alright, which day should I come?”
“It’s my Tuesday/Thursday course. You can pick which morning you’d prefer.”
“Anything else?”
“Tell me about your research.”
“Are you just using me to procrastinate?” You raise an eyebrow at him.
“Hey, what happens between me and the stack of papers I need to grade is none of your business.” You laugh at him again. Harry was funny, no doubt about that. “Come on, just a few minutes, tell me what you’re working on.”
“I am researching anonymity online, the pros and cons, how social media is mixed into it, stuff like that. People carry themselves different on the various social media platforms, trying to show specific versions of themselves, but when you’re able to remain anonymous, you somehow are truly able to be yourself without fear of judgement.”
“So, what are the cons then?”
“Oh, there are tons. There’s the fear of someone finding this anonymous version of yourself and being exposed. Then there are the people that forget there’s someone else behind the screen and send nasty messages to other anonymously.”
“That’s my biggest fear with Andy. He’s been begging me for a smart phone, but I just don’t feel comfortable with that yet.” He runs a hand through his hair. “I told him when he was thirteen we could talk about it.”
“It’s funny, I didn’t get my first phone until I was fifteen, and it was one of those ones that slid open and had a keyboard. Literally had to use the family desktop if I wanted to go on Facebook.”
“Do people even use Facebook anymore? Feel like it’s just forty-year-old wine moms and Home Depot dads.” Harry snorts.
“No one uses it anymore because it’s not fun. It may as well be LinkedIn.” You scoff.
“Well, I’ll certainly be looking forward to reading what you whip up when the time comes.” He smiles.
“Thanks.”
“I’ll let you get back to it…um, feel like grabbing a bite later?”
“If you don’t disturb me for the next two hours I’ll consider getting lunch with you.”
“Oh, I love a challenge.” He grins and stands up, leaving your office.
You smile and shake your head. Perhaps your neighbor was becoming a pretty good friend.
//
“You’re coming to Lisa’s tonight, right?” Harry asks you as he slings his bag over his shoulder on Friday afternoon.
“I believe so, six, right?”
“Yup! Do you need directions?”
“I have this thing called a smart phone, and get this…it has an app where if I put in an address, it shows me the route!”
“I really hate it when you’re sarcastic with me.” He rolls his eyes. “Get it enough from my son, you know?”
“Will he be joining the fun as well?”
“Nope, he’s with his mum this weekend. I gotta go get him from school and get him all packed up for her.”
“Does she always pick him up?”
“She picks him up on Fridays, and I pick him up on Sundays.” He shrugs. “It just works for us.”
“Makes sense.”
“Right, well, I’ll see you later.”
“Okay.” You smile and wave him off.
After knuckling at your eyes, you head home around 4PM. You wanted to shower and freshen up before heading to Lisa’s. It was a beautiful, chilly Fall evening, so you opt for a light sweater and black jeans, and a pair of boots. You run your fingers through your hair, reapply some makeup, and grab the bottle of white you had chilling in your fridge. You plug the address into your phone, and get going.
It was about a twenty-five minute drive. Lisa lived in a neighborhood with a lot of beautiful homes. Her driveway was long and winding, and on top of a hill.
“This must be a bitch in the winter.” You say to yourself. Maybe that was why she was hosting the September game night. There were a couple of other cars there, so you didn’t feel totally awkward. You walk up to the door and ring the bell.
“Y/N!” Lisa exclaims and hugs you. “Come on in, so glad you could make it.”
“Thank you for having me. I brought some wine.” You hand the bottle to her as you step inside.
“Oh, thank you, dear.”
“Shoes on or off?”
“On is perfectly fine, it’s all hardwood.” Lisa leads you inside. “I’ll get this open.”
You wait for her to pour you a glass, and then she leads you into the living room. Sandra and Mateo were already there. You wave hello and grab a seat.
“Y/N, this is Dan, the English department chair, Alice, Joe, and Fred.”
“Hi, it’s nice to formally meet you all.” You stand up and shake a few hands.
Everyone mingles and eats the snacks Lisa puts out. Her husband was quite the co-host. Janette shows up next, and you end up sitting with her. Harry’s the last to arrive. Lisa gets him a glass of red right away. He looked handsome. A tan cardigan over a white t-shirt and a pair of light wash jeans.
“Sorry I’m late everyone, Paige was over an hour late picking Andy up. There was an accident on the highway and she got stuck behind it, it was a whole thing.”
Paige, it was the first time Y/N heard Harry actually say the name of Andy’s mother.
“No worries, H.” Andre says. “Relax, we haven’t even decided on the game yet.”
“Thank god.” Harry plops down next to you on the couch. “Janette, did Y/N tell you she observed my wellness class yesterday?”
“She did, she told me she fell asleep the second you turned the lights off.” She snickers.
“Please, keep talking about me like I’m not even here.” You roll your eyes. Harry and Janette both lean over you so they can pretend to speak closer. “Okay, okay.” You push them both away. “That’s enough, thank you.”
“Alright, everyone, I was thinking we could play charades, yeah?” Lisa announces. “It’ll keep us limber.”
“English vs. CM?” Dan asks.
“You know it.” Lisa grins.
You were pretty good at charades so you weren’t worried. The couple of glasses of wine certainly helped boost your confidence. It was fun to let a little loose with your colleagues. It was some much needed bonding. Harry was quite competitive, which surprised you because he was usually so chill about everything. It was down to the final points, Harry needed to guess the name of your film correctly.
You put up two fingers.
“Second word.” You nod and he licks his lips in concentration You pretend to open a book and write it in it. “Uhhh, book…” He furrows his brows. You look up like as if you’re reading something, and then you pretend to write the book some more. “Notes…notebook, oh! The Notebook!” You tap your finger on your nose and your team cheers. “Ha!” Harry stands up and hugs you. He lets you go and looks back at everyone. “That was exhilarating. Better luck next time.” He says to the English team.
“Wasn’t exactly a difficult film to guess.” Alice says playfully.
“I had zero control over the slip of paper I chose out of that hat.” You grin.
You all help clean up before heading out. You slip your coat on and head outside after saying your goodbyes.
“Y/N?” You hear Harry from behind you. “You’re good to drive, right?”
“Yeah, of course. Wouldn’t get behind the wheel if I wasn’t.”
“Alright.” He smiles. “Just wanted to be sure.” He walks with you outside.
“It would be pretty bad if I got so fucked up I couldn’t drive home from our department chair’s house.”
“Lisa would actually get a pretty good kick out of it.” He smirks. You get to your car and press the button to unlock it. “Well…I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend.”
“Same to you, any big plans while Andy’s gone?”
“Not really, I try to save the fun stuff for while he’s with me.”
“Aw, no hot dates.” You wink at him. Okay, maybe some of the wine was still in your system. He blinks at you for a moment and then he bursts out laughing.
“Right, the ladies are really fighting to knock my door down.” He wipes a tear from under his eye. “Can’t remember the last time I went on a proper date to be honest with you. Not exactly a turn on when you bring someone home and they see kid’s toys hanging around.”
“Oh come on, you’ve totally got the hot single dad thing working for you.” You nudge his shoulder. “Janette I usually go out on Saturday nights for drinks, you should come out tomorrow.”
“Um…which, uh, which bar do you go to?”
“Firefly, little more adult. We don’t really see the college kids there.”
“Sure, yeah, I know that place well. Um, what time?”
“Nine?”
“I’ll be there.” He smiles.
“Great! Goodnight, Harry.”
“Night, Y/N.”
He watches as you get into your car and drive away. It wasn’t until you woke up the next morning that you realize that you essentially asked him out, and that you sort of flirted with him. You text Janette immediately and let her know he may show up.
Jan: Yay! Harry’s so much fun to go drinking with, this’ll be great!
Will it? You think to yourself. It was one thing to have a couple of glasses of wine with colleagues, but you usually got pretty drunk with Janette, always taking an uber to and from the bar. You were a nervous wreck all day, and you weren’t sure why. You were hoping all of your Saturday chores would distract you, but they weren’t.
As you get ready, you decide on a blue dress that showed a tasteful amount of cleavage, pairing it with patterned nylons, and boots. Your hair is down and wavy, and your makeup looks cute, for now. You put on your leather jacket and head out. Well, not before doing a quick shot at home. Your leg bounces the entire time in the uber. Janette is already there at your usual table. She waves you over and you sit down.
“I texted Harry earlier.” She says to you. “Just so he really knew he was invited.”
“I don’t have his number, otherwise I would have. Sorry, I feel like I should have asked first. This is sort of like our girl’s night.”
“Are you kidding?! Like I said earlier, Harry is super fun to drink with.”
After you both guzzle down your first drink, Harry arrives. He’s got a black button up on with the first few buttons undone, exposing the birds on his collar bones. He smiles when he sees the both of you.
“H!” Janette says, getting up to hug him and give him a kiss on the cheek.
“Hello, love.” He gives her a squeeze and a returned kiss. He looks at you and you give him a shy smile before giving him a side hug. “Thanks again for the invite, haven’t been to this place in a while.” He slides into the stool.
“Oh, of course!” Janette says. “I was excited when Y/N said you were coming.”
“Apparently I need to do more fun things when Andy’s with his mum.” He nudges you.
“What do you usually do when he’s gone?” You ask him.
“I usually clean up the house, stalk up on food, wash his sheets…dad stuff.” He shrugs with a laugh. The waitress comes over and smiles.
“Can I get you started with anything?”
“Rum and coke would be great, and I’ll start a tab.” He hands her his credit card and she nods.
“Nother round for you two?”
“Please!” Janette says.
“Yes.” You say with a smile.
The waitress nods and smiles. She walks away and looks back at Harry, blushing.
“Oh boy.” Janette grins. “I think you may get lucky tonight, H.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Our waitress did a double take.”
“She’s probably, like, ten years younger than I am or something. Not my style.”
“Fair enough.” She shrugs.
“What about you? Any ladies you’re trying to take home?”
“Well, if I weren’t in a long distance relationship, sure.”
“You and Sadie are still together?” He asks almost in shock.
“Of course we are! You would have known if we broke up.”
“Doesn’t it get difficult?” He frowns.
“I really don’t mind. When we’re able to be together it’s nice, but I like having my own space.” Janette turns to you. “Sadie is a photographer, traveling for National Geographic.”
“That’s incredible!”
The waitress brings all of the dinks over and you clink your glasses.
“Alright, what’s the gossip, ladies? Who are we shitting on?”
“Hmm.” Jaette taps her chin. “Perhaps Dan? He’s obviously still in love with Lisa.”
“Still?” Your jaw drops.
“Back in the day,” Harry starts, “he and Lisa were quite the item. She met Arnold at a conference. He’s a chef.”
“Ah, that’s why the food is so good.”
“Mhm, he’s retired now, but at the time she had to make this big choice between the two of them, and she chose Arnold. Built an entire life with him. Dogs, kids, big house, you name it.” Harry explains.
“And Dan’s been married and divorced twice. Lisa’s the one that got away.” Janette sighs. “Course, Lisa’s incredibly oblivious, or she pretends to be. You’d think they were simply best friends.”
“I wonder what made her choose Arnold over Dan.” You say.
“Good dick.” Janette says. “Simple as that.”
“Oh, come on.” You roll your eyes.
“You come on! Are you going to tell me you’d give up good dick?”
“So you’re telling me she was seeing both of them at the same time, and she chose Arnold because he hit it better?”
“That’s what I’m inferring, yes.” She sips her drink. “Getting to come every time you fuck is worth it, don’t you think?”
Harry nearly chokes on his drink from laughing.
“I forgot how nasty you can be, I love it.” He says and looks at you. “So, Y/N, what’s your answer? Is an orgasm reason enough to choose one guy over another?”
“Well, considering that I dated some real fuck when I was in college just so I could get some good dick, I’d have to say yes.” You say, enjoying the look on both of their faces. “I mean, it’s hard to remember how much you can’t stand someone when they’re railing you to completion.”
“Very true.” Janette agrees. “Also, Arnold is a really sweet man, sort of the whole package for her. I don’t think Lisa liked be challenged, and Dan, I heard, would challenge her on everything.”
“I’m usually up for a debate, but I get that. I don’t need to be in control of everything, but agreeable people are better.” You say.
“I wouldn’t say it’s because he’s agreeable.” Harry says, finishing his drink, and gesturing towards the waitress for another. “Arnold is smitten, not just in love, big difference.”
“How so?” You ask.
“When you’re…oh, thank you.” He smiles at the waitress brings him a new drink. “When you’re smitten, you walk around with rose colored glasses, to some that can be a bad thing, but I think when you’re that in love, you should really adore the person you’re with too. Arnold adores Lisa, Dan doesn’t. You can tell by the way they both look at her.”
It was nice discussing things like this with people who also observed people the way you did. It makes you wonder, though, what they may have picked up on about you.
After a few more drinks, you knew you needed to stop when your vision began to get hazy. Harry only had his two drinks since he drove himself. He drank some water as the night went on.
“H, Y/N lives not too far from you, help her save a couple bucks and drive her home, would you?”
“Jan…” You scold her.
“She’s right, I could give you a lift, if you want?”
“Um…well…sure.”
You both say goodnight to Janette, and Harry helps you into his car. He keeps the music low as he pulls out of the bar.
“So, where am I taking you?”
“To The Ledges, do you know where that is?”
“Sure do.” He chuckles. “Lived there myself when I first moved to the area.”
“Really?! It’s a great size place. I love it.”
“Got any pets or anything?”
“Nope, just me, myself, and I.” You grin.
“And you prefer it that way?”
“Well, after living at home my whole life, and then having various roommates over the years, I’d say that I’m quite enjoying living alone.”
“Good for you. I’m glad you’re liking it here so much. The person you replaced was such a twat.” You burst into laughter. “I’m serious! He never came to any of the outings. It was like he didn’t even care that we were trying to get him to engage. The second he got his PhD he left. Good riddance.” Harry scoffs.
“I really like it. It’s a lot different than being at a college in the city. I wasn’t sure how I’d do working in a college town, but I’m really enjoying it. I feel safe, you know? I didn’t always feel safe in the city.”
“I’m sorry, that had to have been difficult.”
“On the late nights it was. I usually had UPD walk me to my car. I don’t really have to do that here. I feel like I gained a lot of independence back.”
Harry pulls up to the apartment building, and parks. He turns the ignition off and you raise your eyebrows at him.
“What are you doing?”
“I was going to walk you to the door…”
“Oh…you don’t have to.”
“I insist.”
“Really, it’s okay. Um, thank you for the ride, it was really nice of you.”
“Thanks for the invite, I had fun.” He smiles.
“Me too.” You smile back and get out of the car.
You hear the car turn back on, and you know he waits to drive off until you’re inside.
//
“Paige, I get him for Christmas, why are you trying to change things?”
“You usually get him for Christmas because you don’t usually get him for the school year.” She crosses her arms as she stands outside in the frigid early December air.
“But you just got him for Thanksgiving.”
“You don’t celebrate Thanksgiving!”
“I observe!” He takes a deep breath. “His plane ticket is already paid for, he’s coming with me to London like always, and he will be back to you for New Year’s, like always.” He steps closer to her. “He looks forward to seeing my mum and Gem every winter, please don’t take that away from him.”
“It’s just…we’re hosting a Hanukkah party, and Noah really wanted him to be a part of it…”
“Shit.” Harry rubs the back of his neck. “There’s Jewish holidays all the time, couldn’t Andy be a part of the next celebration?”
“Dad! Come on, the Pats game is starting!”
“One second, just saying bye to mum!” He yells to Andy, and looks back at Paige, eyes pleading.
“Alright…he can still go with you.”
“Thank you.” Harry breathes. “His cousins would miss him terribly.”
“I know, I’d feel terrible doing that to him. I’m just trying to balance all of this. I wanna be a good partner to Noah, and somewhat of a mother figure to Rachel, but I don’t want Andy to feel like I’m favoring them over him. He comes first, he always will.”
“I’m sure he knows that.” He puts his hand on her shoulder. “Have a latke for me, yeah?”
“Yeah.” She smiles and gives his hand a squeeze before getting back into her car.
Harry heads inside and sits on the couch while Andy sits in his usual spot on the love seat, entranced by the football game.
“What was that all about? I heard shouting.”
“Could barely hear each other over the wind outside. Nothing to worry about. We were just confirming plans for your holiday break.”
“I’m still going to London, right?”
“Of course! No question about it.”
Andy smiles at Harry before returning his attention to the TV. Harry was usually very honest with Andy, but he didn’t need to worry him with any of the drama.
//
“You survived your first semester, congrats!” Janette says, popping a bottle of champagne as she walks into your office.
“Not over yet, I have finals to grade.”
“Whatever, the kids are gone, that’s something to celebrate.” She nods towards the plastic cups you keep in your office, and you grab two. “Any plans for the holidays? Going home at all?”
“Oh sure. Doing the Hanukkah thing with my folks, and then doing New Year’s in Boston with some friends.”
“Fun!”
“Wait.” Harry says, overhearing, grabbing the bottle for a swig. “You’re Jewish?”
“Yes?” You raise an eyebrow at him and take a sip from your cup.
“Brilliant. Paige’s boyfriend is Jewish, and I think it’s confusing for Andy. He doesn’t much like asking th guy questions, maybe he could talk to you sometime.”
“Sure.” You shrug. “Any plans for the holidays?”
“Yeah, Andy comes home to London for Christmas, and then I send him back for New Year’s with his mum.”
“You send him on the plane alone?”
“I haven’t always, but they let me walk him right to the gate, and he flies first class, so it’s very safe. They let his mum wait at the other gate too. I like to stay home for a few weeks if I can. I’m afraid I’m a bit of a mama’s boy.” He takes another swig of the bottle. “I am not looking forward to grading these papers. I really should just have each class do a presentation, can grade those right on the spot.”
“Tell me about it.” Janette groans. “My Advanced Comp class is going to be the death of me.”
“Well, clearly this champagne is going to keep us all awake enough to get through it.”
The three of you stand there laughing. You were looking forward to the long winter break. It would give you plenty of time to work on your research, and you wouldn’t be disturbed by any students popping in and out of your office, as much as you enjoyed the chats.
//
It was the beginning of January, there you were, working away in your office. You had a long flowy dress on, for some reason, and your door bursts open.
“Y/N! I’ve traveled across the pond for you!”
“Harry! You’re back.”
“That’s right, darling, I’m back.” He pushes everything off your desk, walks around to your and pulls you close to him. He crashes his mouth to yours.
“Oh, Harry.” You moan.
“Oh, Y/N.” He moans back before laying you on your desk. “I’m going to make you feel so good.” He rips your dress of and kneels in front of you, diving his head between your legs.
You wake up in a cold sweat, panting. Your eyes snap open and you grimace. Your legs feel sweaty, so you kick your blankets off.
“What the fuck?” You say to yourself as you sit up. Harry was attractive, but you never once fantasized about him. You reach between your legs and gasp. “Did I just fucking have a wet dream?!” You lick at your sticky fingers and shake your head in disbelief. “Shower, go shower Y/N.” You were talking to yourself, yes, but it was needed to help you calm down.
You were incredibly embarrassed. Harry was your friend, not someone you wanted to fuck, and certainly not on your desk in your office at work. Most people would be turned off, but doing it in a professional place was a big turn off for you. The idea of getting caught was also not a turn on for you. If you were ever caught you could be fired, and it just wasn’t worth it. Neither was dating a colleague. It wasn’t against the rules or anything, nor was it frowned upon, but dating in the workplace could lead to a lot of problems. You had a PhD on the line. Maybe it was time to just suck it up and go for a one night stand.
//
You had forgotten all about your dream by the time the January faculty meeting hit. That is, until Harry was the last to walk in. Your face flushes immediately. His hair was a little longer, and he had a bit of scruff that he normally wouldn’t have. He smiles and says hello to a couple of people, and then sits down right next to you.
“Hi.” He whispers with a smile.
“Hello.” You swallow and don’t look at him.
“How was your-“
“Can we get started?” Lisa addresses the group. “Much to go over, we need to start talking about the fall schedule.”
You were grateful for the distraction of the discussion, but you felt Harry’s eyes burn into you every few moments. He had to have known you were acting weird, you wouldn’t fucking look at him. Even if you thought to try, you just couldn’t. Two hours later, and the meeting finally ends. You gather your things quickly and head out, and down to your office. Just as you’re able to take a deep breath, you look up and see Harry standing in your doorway, hands in his pockets, squinting at you.
“Are we good?” He asks.
“Um.” You focus on the space behind him. “Yes, why wouldn’t we be?”
“Because you refuse to look at me. Even now, you’re not really looking at me.” He shifts his weight so he’s stand up normally. “Are you mad because I didn’t reach out over break?”
“What? No! I could care less about that, it wasn’t like I reached out to you.”
“So…what is it then? You make eye contact all the time, it’s not like you to not.”
“I…” You suck both of your lips into your mouth. “It’s nothing, it’s stupid, I’m being stupid.”
“If it’s stupid then just tell me.” He comes in and sits down on your loveseat.
“Harry, please.” You shake your head and sit down in your desk chair.
“Come on, Y/N. Clearly something’s bothering you.”
“Ugh.” You groan and get up to close your door. You sit on the edge of your desk. “I…had a rather odd dream a week or so ago…”
“Okay?”
“And you were in it.” You whisper.
“What was I doing in your dream?” He whispers back.
“That’s just it, I don’t know.” You rest your chin in your palm as you cross your arms over your chest.
“Well I must have done something to make you not even look at me. Did I hurt you, do something scary?”
“No…I suppose I wouldn’t call it scary, but I was certainly disturbed when I woke up.”
“What then?” A smirk grows on his face. “Don’t tell me you had a sex dream or something.” When your face stays the way it is his smile fades. “You had a sex dream about me?” You nod yes. “Where were we?”
“Here.”
“In your office?!”
“Shh!” You swat your hands in his direction. “Do you want the building to hear?”
“You had a dream that we fucked in your office?”
“Well, it wasn’t fucking per say…you sort of…I don’t know…it doesn’t matter.”
“No tell me, let’s talk this through.”
“You wiped everything off my desk, ripped my clothes off, sat me on top, and then…” You wince slightly. “You sort of…got your head between my legs, and then I woke up.” You say the rest of it quickly. “And I was utterly concerned when I woke up because I swear I don’t see you that way, Harry. You’re my friend, just my friend. I forgot all about it, and then I saw you and got all embarrassed again.”
He stands up from his seat and gives you a shy smile.
“It was just a dream, you don’t need to be embarrassed. We’re adults, yeah? Let’s act like it.”
“I just don’t want you thinking I’m some…sex maniac or something.”
“I don’t.”
“Okay…I’m sorry if I worried you during the meeting. It really is good to see you, I’m glad you’re back. We could have lunch soon, I’d love to hear about London.”
“Yeah, maybe.” He smiles, but you can tell it’s fake.
He heads out and goes into his own office, closing the door behind him. For whatever reason, your words hurt him. Just my friend rang through his mind. It wasn’t as though it were a lie, you were just friends, but you made it clear you didn’t want him to be the one between your legs in a dream. At first he was flattered, but now…well, now he just felt sad. Was he not good enough to be the one to get you off? Even if in a dream? He hears a knock on the door.
“Yes?”
You open it slowly.
“I hurt your feelings…”
“A little.” He admits. “Not sure why, though.”
“I just didn’t want you to think I was objectifying you.”
“It was a dream, Y/N, you have zero control over it.”
“But I must have been thinking of you subconsciously, right? Isn��t that how that works?”
“Okay, so maybe you were thinking of me and maybe that got mixed in with…whatever else.”
“I just don’t want you thinking I want to fuck you, that’s all.”
“That doesn’t make me feel better.” He mumbles.
“You want me to want to fuck you?!”
“Now who’d being loud?!”
“Sorry…”
“It’s just, well, how would you feel if I told you I didn’t want to fuck you, you probably wouldn’t feel too great about yourself.”
“It’s not that you’re not attractive, Harry-“
“This is making it worse.” He runs his hands over his face and looks at you. “It was just a dream, nothing to worry about, okay?”
“Things won’t be weird between us?”
“No.”
“You promise?”
“I promise.”
“I’m really sorry. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did in that meeting, then we wouldn’t have needed to talk about it.”
“Did you tell Janette?”
“I resent that, just because I’m close with her doesn’t mean she knows every bit of my business.”
“I just didn’t know if I should be expecting some teasing from her.”
“No, none, and you better not tease me either.”
“I won’t.” He smiles. “London was good by the way…”
“Good, I’m glad.” You smile at him. “Talk later?”
“Yeah.”
//
“Not that I’m not happy to be out with the two of you, but why are the three of us out to dinner?” Andy asks.
“Mum and I thought it would be nice to see what you wanted to do for your February vacation. Usually you come see me and we go skiing, but mum knows how to ski too-“
“You’re canceling our trip?!”
“No! We were just thinking mum could take you this year.”
“But it’s your cabin.”
“And I don’t mind sharing.”
“Andy…I thought it would be nice for the four of us to go together. Noah knows how to snowboard, and Rachel wants to take a skiing lesson.”
“Great, so now this going to be a huge family trip? I don’t wanna do that, Mum.” Andy groans.
“Andy.” Harry sighs. “I think Mum and I have been very accommodating to you this year. Could you please just try to help us out a little? Do you know how many kids would kill to have their parents take them on a ski trip for their breaks?”
“I’m not trying to be ungrateful, I’m sorry.” He looks down at his plate and then back up to Harry. “Can’t you still come? The house is big enough.”
“It’s not a bad idea, Har.” Paige says to him and his eyes widen.
“Would Noah and Rachel feel comfortable with that? I wouldn’t want to overstep…”
“I’ll talk to them, I can’t see either of them feeling weird about it. She refers to you as Uncle Harry as it is, and it’s your cabin, I don’t think Noah would care.”
“Would you be alright with it?”
“Sure.” She shrugs. “There’s that spare room on the other end of the house, so you could have your own space and the kids could stay in the bunk room.”
“Wait, so this is happening?” Andy perks up. “You’d really come, Dad?”
“Yeah, if it’s not weird for anyone, I’m in.”
Andy gets up from the table and moves to hug both Harry and Paige, both of them looking at each other surprised. They give each other mental high fives for being able to figure things out.
“I’m really excited now.” Andy says as he sits back down.
“Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way…” Paige grins and looks back at one of the waitresses, giving her a nod. Happy birthday starts being sung throughout the restaurant.
“Oh my god.” Harry closes his eyes and groans. “This dinner wasn’t about me…”
“Nonsense.” She chuckles. “How often do we all get to celebrate together?”
A small cake with candles is brought over in front of Harry. The singing continues and he feels thoroughly embarrassed.
“Wanna help me blow ‘em out?” He asks Andy.
“Yeah!” He leans over and blows out the candles and the restaurant claps.
Harry looks at Paige and shakes his head. She laughs and thanks the waitresses.
“Andy, go get in Dad’s lap, I’ll take your picture together. I’ve got your gift for him in the car too, I’ll go get it.” Andy crawls into Harry’s lap, and Paige uses Harry’s phone to snap the photo. She beams when she looks at it. “You should get this one printed, it’s adorable.” She gets up and leaves to go get the gifts.
“Did you know about all this?” He says to Andy giving him a squeeze before letting him go.
“She just told me we were meeting you for dinner instead of going straight to your place.” He shrugs.
Paige returns shortly with a few cards and bags.
“Alright, this is from Rachel and Noah.”
“They didn’t have to get me anything…”
“They insisted!”
Harry takes the card out and smiles. Rachel had clearly drawn him a picture, it was cute. His smile grows wider when he takes a nail kit out of the small bag.
“I was due for one of these, I’ll have to text Noah a thank you.” Harry opens the next bag and sees a card from Andy that he also drew. In the bag was a new set of pocket squares for his suits, that he desperately needed, some bandanas, scrunchies, and a gift card to his favorite clothing store. “Went all out son, thank you.”
“Thought your…what was the word you used, Mum?”
“Wardrobe.” She chuckles.
“Yeah! Thought your wardrobe could use an update.”
“Should I be offended?” He says, raising an eyebrow.
“I think you should be happy your son has your keen eye for fashion.” She slides another card over. “That one’s from me.”
“You’ve done enough.” He says before leaning over to kiss the top of Andy’s head.
“Just open it.”
Harry rolls his eyes and opens the card. He starts laughing. There was some joke about being close co-parents, and a gift card to one of his favorite restaurants.
“Thank you.”
“More than welcome.”
Andy hugs Paige goodbye in the parking lot before hopping in the backseat of Harry’s car.
“Were you surprised, Dad?”
“Very! Thank you again for the gifts, it was very thoughtful of you.”
“I’m more excited about going skiing now.”
“Sorry if we scared you. I just wanna make sure Mum gets to see you.”
“I know.” He sighs. “Hey, Dad?”
“Yeah?”
“How come Mum has Noah, but you don’t have anyone?”
“I have you.”
“You know what I mean.”
“I just…I don’t know, I don’t have much time for dating.”
“What do you do on the weekends when I’m not with you?”
“Sometimes I see friends, or I catch up on some grading, I clean up too. You’re gonna start doing more chores, that would be the ultimate birthday gift.”
“It’s okay if you wanna date, you know…”
“I don’t exactly need your permission.” He chuckles.
“I know…but I want you to know I’m okay with it.”
“Well, I appreciate that, thanks.”
//
When Harry walks into his office Monday morning he’s surprised to see a vase full of flowers. There’s a small card with it:
Happy Birthday, H!
-        Y/N
Harry smiles to himself and smells the flowers, he couldn’t believe you remembered. He only mentioned it once when his birthday was. Thirty-two was off to a great start. He hangs his jacket up and gets his computer set up. His first class wasn’t until 9AM, so he had some time to prep and wake up a bit more before heading to the lecture hall. He sees you walk by on your way to your office.
“Oh! You’re here!” You had two coffees in your hands. “My gift wasn’t complete yet.” You walk in and hand him his coffee. “Black coffee.” You smile.
“Thank you, the flowers are lovely.”
“Not that I thought you needed more plants in here.” You joke. Harry had a fuck ton of plants in his office windowsill.
“Well excuse me for enjoying nature.” He scoffs, and takes a sip of his coffee. You sit down on the couch in his office.
“Did you have a good weekend?”
“I did, Paige and I took Andy out to dinner to talk about his February break, and it turned into a little surprise birthday thing, it was nice. Can’t remember the last time we did something like that as a family. I mean, we have shared birthday parties for him and stuff, but I think he enjoys when it’s just the three of us.”
“If you don’t mind me asking…did he ever know the two of you as a couple?”
“No.” Harry sighs. “I think he was almost two when she and I called it quits. Now look at us, we’re all going on a ski trip together, including her boyfriend and his daughter.”
“That won’t be weird?”
“Not really, I’ve known Noah a while.”
“How long have they been together?”
“Well, they’ve been a couple for almost three years, but they were friends beforehand. He’s one of the lawyers at the office she works at. He came on, like, a year after she and I split, they were friends for a while, and I think once he knew she and I weren’t getting back together he made his move.” Harry shrugs. “No skin off my nose, I just wanted her to be happy. His daughter Rachel is as cute as a button too.” He takes another sip of his coffee. “Poor thing, her mum died in a car accident when she was really little. Paige is a great mum, so it was a good fit for everyone I think. The only thing I don’t love is that Noah is, like, almost forty.”
“How old is Paige?”
“Almost thirty-four, so it’s not super weird, but…I think that’s another reason why he waited to ask her out, you know?”
“I’m surprised he doesn’t have his own cabin to take her too.”
“Nope, just a massive house on the lake.” Harry chuckles and looks at his flowers again. “Thank you again for these, it was a nice surprise.”
“Oh, don’t mention it.” She sips her own coffee and gets up to go to her own office.
“How’d you know I’d like these?”
“Everyone likes getting flowers, Harry.” She smiles and leaves.
//
Harry had cancelled his classes during the week of Andy’s February break like he always did. He had forum posts for them to work in in his absence. Going to the cabin wasn’t ask awkward as he thought, and it was good bonding for Rachel and Andy. Harry, Noah, and Paige could hear the two of them giggling as they watched movies at night, it was sweet. Harry mostly stuck with skiing with Andy during the day, and he and Paige took him for a run or two as well. As Andy got older co-parenting got easier, for whatever reason. Any lingering feelings between Harry and Paige had simply fizzled into a normal friendship. There was no malice between them which was good for Andy to see.
“Uncle Harry?” Rachel asks one night at dinner.
“Yes, love?”
“How come you have an accent, but Andy doesn’t?”
“Because Andy wasn’t born and raised in a country where people sound like me. Although sometimes you sound like me when you’ve been around me a lot.” Harry looks at Andy.
“My friends tease me for how I say pasta sometimes.” He chuckles. “I say that like you.”
“It’s true! You say taco like Dad too. It’s pretty funny.”
“Well, those are my two favorite foods so it makes sense.”
“How come you have so many tattoos?” Rachel asks.
“Honey, tattoos can be really personal.” Noah explains.
“It’s alright, I got a lot of them when I was younger. Think my last one was when Andy was born, got his initials my forearm.” He extends his arm out.
“Harry.” Paige clears her throat, nodding towards his mermaid tattoo and shakes her head no.
“Oop! Sorry.” He blushes. “Sometimes I forget she’s there.” He chuckles.
“Can we paint nails after dinner, Uncle Harry?” Rachel pleads.
“Sure! Brought that nail kit you and Dad so nicely got for me.”
“Yay! It’s okay, right, Daddy?”
“Of course, princess.” Noah says lovingly towards his daughter.
After dinner, Harry sits with Rachel at the kitchen table, to not make a mess, while Paige, Noah, and Andy sit in the living room watching TV. On the outside looking in the scene may be odd, but this was working well for all of them. Andy was having a good time and that was all Harry cared about.
//
It was a Thursday night, you both swiped right, and you met him at a bar. After a few drinks you climbed into the backseat of his car and before you knew it you were bouncing up and down on his dick while he pressed hot kisses to your neck. His name was Gabriel, and he was just what you needed right now. Or he would have been if he had been able to last a moment longer. You were so close, and he came into the condom before you had a chance to have your own release. He didn’t even ask if you got yours, he just kissed your cheek and lifted you off him.
“Care to take this back to my place?” He says.
“Think I’ve had enough for one night, thanks.” You say as you button your pants back up.
“Let me at least drive you home.”
“No, that’s okay, I can take an uber.” You get out of his car and slam the door shut. He gets out and looks at you, you turn around and look at him.
“Another time?”
“No, I don’t think so.” You say bluntly and his face falls.
“Thought we just had a nice time.”
“You had a nice time because you got to finish.” You huff as you fix your jacket. You take your phone out and order your ride.
“Thought you did, my bad.”
“Right.” The car pulls up, and you get in.
This is why you hated doing things like this. Men on these dating apps just wanted to get theirs. They just wanted a place to stick it and they didn’t care if you were left satisfied or not. You take a nice, long shower when you get back, scrubbing the smell of Gabriel away from you. You grimace when you see the kiss mark he left on your collar bone. Luckily a shirt and scarf would cover it, and it didn’t look like it would last longer than a couple of days anyways.
//
“Well, were you being vocal about what you needed?” Janette asks you as she sits on the edge of your desk Monday morning.
“I said things like right there or like that…he didn’t even warn me that he was coming, he just did. Then he wanted me to come back to his place with him…”
“Maybe he would have put on a better show for you.”
“The previews certainly didn’t leave me wanting to see more.”
“Preview for what.” Harry says, peeping his head in. He had a slight tan from skiing, and it was sort of cute.
“Y/N saw a really bad preview for this movie about this loser, that’s all.” Janette says. “How was your week away?”
“Actually, not too bad. I think it was good for us to all do something together. Andy had a great time, that’s all I cared about. He even agreed to be with his mum for the entire April vacation.”
“Oh? What’s she going to take him to do?” You ask.
“They’re gonna go to New York to see some shows, I thought it was a great idea. It’ll be good for him to get some real culture.”
“And that’s not a trip you wanted to join in on?” Janette smirks.
“Hmm, large cabin where I have my own space or cramped hotel room?” He weighs his option. “I’ll take the bitter cold and the cabin, thanks.”
“What do you think you’ll do while he’s away?” You ask.
“No idea, I’ve got time to figure it out. Honestly, it’s perfect timing because that’s right during advising weeks so I’ll actually be able to help my students without him sitting in the corner complaining that he’s bored.” He rolls his eyes. “I don’t what’s gonna turn my hair grey first, him or the college students.”
“Oh please.” Janette groans. “Men look so much better with a little grey, makes you look distinguished, it’s us who look like old crones when we let our greys out. I don’t wanna hear it.” She shakes her head and looks at her watch. “Gotta get ready for my next class, so you later.”
“Is it true?”
“What?”
“Do men look better with a little grey.” He runs a hand through his hair.
“Depends on the guy, I think. I mean, I’m twenty-six so a little grey wouldn’t scare me away, but I’m not exactly looking for a silver fox.” You laugh and so does he.
“I missed your sense of humor last week. As good of a time it was, I felt like I had to be very careful about the jokes I cracked.”
“Well, no need for a filter here.”
Harry nods and goes into his own office. He thinks for a moment and then peeps his head back into yours.
“So, what movie preview did you see that you didn’t like?”
“What?”
“When I first came in, you and Jan were talking about-“
“Oh! Um, it was so bad I don’t even remember the name.” You tug slightly at your scarf out of nerves.
“Too bad, I could’ve searched it and had a good laugh.” He shrugs and leaves again.
Sometimes you wondered what Harry’s dating life was like, not that it was any of your business. He had mentioned a couple of times he didn’t make a lot of time for it, but what about one night stands? Did he make sure women got theirs when he was with them?
//
“I’m going to look like a fucking idiot compared to all of you.” You pout as you get your robe and hood on.
“You will not. Sort of miss the master’s robe, honestly, they’ve basically got pockets. You’ll have your doctoral one soon enough.” Harry says, putting on his own robes.
“I can never get this thing right, could you help me?”
“Of course.” He steps behind you and adjusts the blue hood for you.
“Do I need the cap? It’s just an honor’s ceremony.”
“You certainly do, and get used to it. This is one of three times a year you’ll need to put this on.”
“Three?”
“Grad commencement and undergrad commencement are separate ceremonies.”
“And we have to go to both?”
“We do.” He sighs. “You’re also not the only professor on this campus that isn’t a PhD yet, so don’t get down on yourself, yeah? You’re working towards it.” You turn towards him and his hands place gently on your shoulders.
“Thanks, Har.”
He smiles at the nickname and lets go of you. You and the other CM professors head over to the CM Honors Inductee Ceremony. It was a nice event for the honors students within the major. As soon as it ends you rip your cap off. You didn’t enjoy wearing it at all. You mingle with a few parents and take pictures with some of the students that wanted you in their photos.
“Y/N?” One of your students, Kayla, says.
“Yes?”
“I was wondering…for our final assignment, instead of writing you a paper about signs, could I make you a video instead?” She was in your Rhetoric and Semiotics class.
“Hmm, I think that could be really interesting. What would a video entail?”
“Well, I thought I could go to the grocery store and show unwritten rules, like how someone will put a divider down on the belt without having to be asked, or how when you go up to the deli you just grab a ticket, how branding works, stuff like that.”
“As long as you still send me a references page I think that could be fine. Of course, I’d have to show it to the rest of the class.”
“Deal.” She smiles. “Thanks.” You nod and then she walks away.
You head back to your office to hang your robe and hood up in your closet. You grab your back and smack right into your Harry.
“Jesus.” You say and back away. “I’m sorry, I didn’t even see you.”
“No, that was me, I was walking too fast.” He unzips his robe and hangs it up same as you in his own closet.
“Why were you in such a hurry?”
“Single mum at the ceremony got a little too liberal with the hugging, had to get out of there.” He chuckles. “You hungry?”
“I could eat.”
“Wanna go down to the pub? I don’t have Andy’s still in New York…”
“Sure! That sounds great, actually. Let me just drop all this off in my car.” He nods and you both walk down to the parking lot before walking the rest of the way to the pub.
You both sit down at the bar and order drinks. You both end up getting Mediterranean wraps, not feeling quite hungry enough for nachos this time around.
“Any summer plans yet? I know it’s early, but-“
“Paige and I need to sit down with Andy to figure all that out. He got to stay with me all year, so it would be make sense for him to be with her for the summer, but I have a feeling he won’t like that. School gets out in June for him so I’ve got some time…but I have a feeling it’s not going to be easy.”
“Why do you think he wants to be with you so much more?”
“I just think he’s at an age where maybe he feels more comfortable being with me. He’ll be eleven soon, changes are starting to happen.” He chuckles. “Maybe Paige and I could split up the summer or something.”
“How have his grades been? Wasn’t that part of the deal?”
“His marks have been great, he’s doing well. He has some great friends and he loves his teachers. He really enjoyed playing basketball this winter in the town league too.”
“Not that I’m an expert on custody agreements, but couldn’t you do what you’re doing now? Wednesdays and every other weekend with Paige, and the rest of the time with you?”
“He hates the back and forth in the summer, that’s why we agreed on summers with me. I mean, she still sees him in the summer, obviously, but he usually doesn’t have to go every other weekend. We’ll see.” He sighs. “We try to give him what he wants to not make waves, but at the end of the day we’re the parents and he’s the child and what we say goes.” He finishes off his drink and asks for another. “Need a refill?”
“Sure, I could probably handle two.” You shrug.
Two turned into three, then, four, and finally five. The sun had gone down and it was dark outside. You two had split a chocolate lava cake. The bar was starting to fill with college students.
“Holy shit, it’s almost ten!” You say. “Should probably go before some of these kids try to buy me a drink for a passing grade.” Harry laughs at that and agrees. You split the bill, and nearly lose your balance as you hop off the bar stool, clutching as his bicep.
“Wanna split an uber? I can’t drive, and I don’t think you can either.” He chuckles.
“Yeah, good idea. I’ll order it.”
“No, I’ve got it.” He takes his phone out as you both head outside. The car pulls up after a couple of minutes and you both get in. “We’ll drop you off first.”
“Alright.” You smile. “This was fun tonight. I like when we get to hang out.”
“Me too.” He smiles at you. “Can’t believe your first year is almost done.”
“I know, it’s really flown by.” You crane your neck from side to side and sigh. “Maybe now that I know the area better I’ll feel more comfortable trying to really meet someone.”
“Meet someone for what?” You look up at him, making a face as if the answer is obvious. “Oh! That’s cute you think you have time for a relationship.” He laughs.
“Excuse me?”
“Y/N, you spend all your free time on your research.”
“I just spent some free time with you, didn’t I? Janette and I go out, and-“
“Janette travels with Sadie in the summers.”
“Guess that leaves me stuck with you then.” You nudge him. “Actually, I’m hoping to go to Boston for a bit, visit friends and family. I’m hoping to get to the beach too. I love summer.”
“You should come hiking with me. Despite the black flies, May is great because it’s not humid yet.”
“Might have to take you up on that, I really enjoyed it this fall.” The car pulls up in front of your house. “Have a good night, Harry.”
“You too.” You both reach over and hug each other. “See you Monday.”
“See you Monday.” You smile and get out.
//
Once the school year was over, you sat with Lisa and went over your course evaluations. Overall you did really well, and she reaffirmed how happy she was that she hired you. She wishes you a happy summer, and that’s about it. You ask if you’re allowed to use your office in the summer, and she says yes but it gets really hot so it’s not as great as you may think.
Saturday night as you’re having your last girl’s night with Janette you get a text.
Harry: Hey! Know it’s last minute, but I’m taking Andy up Rattlesnake tomorrow morning, care to join?
Y/N: sure! As long as he doesn’t mind…
Harry: got his permission already, we’re all set ;)
You bite your bottom lip and smile, and Janette peaks over your shoulder to see what you could be smiling at.
“God, what a gift it would be if I come back in the fall and you two are dating.”
“Oh, stop.” You nudge her. “We’re friends.”  
“Would it be bad to be more?”
“I don’t really think it’s a good idea to go out with someone you work with…”
“Good luck finding anyone else who’s decent around here then.”
“I could meet someone in Boston, do the long distance thing.”
“That gets old.”
“You’re doing it!”
“Yeah, but I’m more of a free spirit. Sadie and I don’t care about marriage or kids or a house in the hills. You, my sweet friend, would like all of those things.”
“True…” You finish your drink. “Well, if I don’t want to puke on this hike tomorrow I should probably get going.” You both stand and hug and kiss and wish each other fantastic summers.
You get a restful night’s sleep, and get yourself ready in the morning. You had invested in a pair of hiking boots in the fall, so you were feeling prepared. You put on a pair of spandex shorts, and put on some mesh shorts over those. You opt for a sweat resistant short sleeve shirt, and pull your ponytail through a baseball cap. You get everything in your small pack that you’ll need: sunglasses, sunscreen, water bottle, granola bar, rag, and bug spray. You drive out to the trail and park, lathering your arms and legs with sunscreen. You see Harry’s car pull up, and Andy hops out, bandana and clip keeping his hair back, just like Harry’s. Harry had a sleeveless shirt on and you could really see the definition in his shoulder muscles. You put your sunglasses on and head over to them.
“Morning, boys.” You smile.
“Morning.” Harry smiles back.
“Hi, Y/N.” Andy mumbles shyly.
“Hi, Andy. Dad told me you’re doing well in school. Bet you’re about ready to be done, huh?”
“Yeah, only a few more weeks.”
“Can’t believe he’s going into sixth grade. Makin’ me feel old.”
“You are old.” Andy giggles.
“Mhm, thanks.” Harry rolls his eyes. “Let’s get going, shall we?”
Andy walks a few paces ahead of you and Harry.
“His birthday is soon, yeah?”
“Yeah, next weekend, actually…um…Paige is hosting his party this year.” Andy looks back at Harry making a face, and Harry makes a face back at him.
“That’ll be fun.” You say, not noticing the exchange as you look at the various trees surrounding you.
“Yeah…it will be. Um…it’s Saturday afternoon…”
“Weather looking good?”
“Yeah.”
“That’s great. Probably still cold to swim at the lake, though, right?”
“Yeah, but the kids will still have a water balloon fight.”
“Dad, just ask her!” Andy groans as he turns around again.
“Ask me what?”
“He wants you to go with him to the party.”
“Andy!” Harry snaps at him. “Keep walking.”
Andy rolls his eyes and continues to walk ahead of you.
“Is that true, you want me to come?”
“Is that weird?”
“Not really.” You shrug. “Although, I’d only know you and Andy.” You chuckle.
“See…it’s just…Paige’s parents will be there, and that’s fine, but Noah’s parents are coming too, and it would be nice to have a buffer other than my son. He’ll be off playing games and eating junk good, I don’t want him to think he needs to babysit me…”
“I totally get it. I don’t think I have plans, I could go for a little while.”
“Really? I’m not asking too much?”
“Not at all, what are friends for?” You smile and he smiles back.
You walk a few paces ahead of Harry, but still behind Andy, giving Harry the perfect view of your bum in your shorts. He wasn’t staring, but he certainly wasn’t not looking. When you get up to the top your jaw drops. The view of the mountains and the lakes were even better in the late spring. You snap a few photos, taking one of Harry and Andy, Harry taking one of you looking out, and then you all sit down for some water and snacks.
“Andy, do you enjoy hiking with your Dad?”
“Yeah, it’s a lot of fun. We go a lot over the summer.”
“Andy’s hiked two of the 4,000 footers, hoping to get a couple more done this summer.”
“Wow! That’s incredible.”
“You should come with us, Y/N. We’re going to camp overnight at one of them.”
“Oh, you don’t wanna go camping with me, I’m a real snob. I need running water and indoor plumbing.”
“It has that.” Harry says, taking a sip of his water. “There’s bathroom, no shower or anything, but working toilets. You bring all your own camping gear. It’s pretty cool.”
“I’ll consider it. Think I should probably go on hikes that are longer than a mile up.” You laugh.
“You guys can do during the week now that school’s over, right?” Andy says.
“I wouldn’t want to exclude you, Andy.” You smile.
“Don’t worry about me.” He crunches down on his granola bar. He shares another look with Harry, but again it goes unnoticed by you, too busy looking out at the beauty of the mountains and lakes.
You all hike down the mountain in not time and say your goodbyes. Harry tells you he’ll text you with more details about the party later in the week.
“I told you she’d say yes.” Andy says from the backseat of the car.
“I wish you had let me work up to it a little more.”
“You were taking too long. Sometimes you just need to pull the trigger, Dad.”
“Is that so?” Harry laughs. “Things are a little more complicated at my age. Sort of awkward asking a colleague out on a date.”
“If you two are friends does that make it a date?”
“Well, she’ll be attending with me, so that makes her my date.”
“Does that mean you’ll kiss her goodnight?”
“Andy!” Harry looks back for a moment and then gets his eyes back on the road. “No, I’m not going to kiss her. You heard her, what are friends for, that’s all she sees me as.” He sighs to himself.
“That’s why you need to step up your game.”
“Son, do me a favor?”
“Yeah?”
“Just, shut up for the rest of the drive home.”
Andy bursts out laughing, but does as Harry asks, knowing he’s being a bit annoying.
//
It was a beautiful day on Saturday, but you were worried about being cold out by the water, so you opt for a pair of high-waist jean capris that flare a bit at the bottom. You find a sleeveless white blouse and pair it with a blue cardigan. You put your hair up in your two buns, and throw on a pair of wedges.
Harry: I’m outside
“Shit.” You say, just finishing your makeup. You run around, grabbing your purse, and the box you had wrapped for Andy’s gift, and head out.
You open the passenger seat and get settled, smiling at Harry.
“You didn’t have to get him anything.”
“I know, it’s just a new basketball. I saw it at WalMart when I was picking up a card. I hate showing up to these things empty handed. What did you get him?”
“A new bike.” He grins. “It’s in his mum’s garage already.”
“Oh! He’ll be so excited. He skateboard too right?”
“Yeah, I really don’t know where he gets his coordination from. Other than skiing I’m pretty clumsy.”
“Don’t you go to a boxing gym?”
“Yeah, and I look like a proper oaf.” He laughs and looks at you. “You look nice by the way. Your outfits are always so put together.”
“Oh, um, thanks.” You blush slightly. You wanted to tell him that you did your hair the way you did because you know he sort of likes it, but you thought that might be a weird thing to say. “Does, um, Paige know you’re bringing me?”
“She does.” Harry nods. “You’re not, like, nervous to meet her are you?”
“No.” You scoff. “Why would I be?”
“I don’t know.” You shrug. “What did you say to her about me?”
“Well, before I got a chance to say anything last night when she picked Andy up, he spilled the beans.” He rolls his eyes. “So I told her you’re a friend from work…is that okay?”
“Yeah, that’s what I am so it makes sense.” You drum your fingers on top of the box to the beat of the music. “None of your family will be there?”
“They’re going to FaceTime in for it. They came for his tenth birthday since it’s a bit more sentimental.”
“Do you miss them?”
“Oh sure, but I love here too much to go back permanently. I like going during winter break, that’s enough.”
“You don’t go during the summer?”
“Sometimes I do and sometimes I don’t. Sometimes they come to visit here during the summer too. My sister has two kids of her own so it’s not always easy to travel.” You nod your head. “You know, I’ve known you almost a year and I don’t know a thing about your family.”
“What’s there to know? My parents are still together, somehow, I’ve got an older brother who’s a sous chef at a restaurant in Boston. He’s not married, but he has a partner and he’s just lovely. I usually stay with them if I go home for a visit.”
“That’s great! How much older is he?”
“He’s around your age, actually, so not a huge age difference.”
“And when’s your birthday?”
“Beginning of August.” You grin.
“Wow, so you had just turned twenty-six when you came to us.”
“Pretty much, got hired at twenty-five, not too shabby.”
“Not at all.”
The conversation went on for the entire drive. That’s how it always was with you two, always a lot to talk about. When you get out of the car you’re able to get a good look at Harry’s outfit. His outfits were usually well crafted, you’d call his style dad-chic. He was in a pair of tan slacks that he had cuffed at the bottom, a pair of white loafers to go with them, a white tank top tucked in with a floral open short-sleeve button up. Very handsome. You smile at each other and then he leads you around back to where the party was. You weren’t the first people there, but you weren’t the last either.
“Dad!” Andy exclaims and runs over to you both. Harry picks him up and swings him around before setting him down.
“Happy birthday, kiddo.”
“Thanks! Look, all my friends from school came.” He points over to them. Harry recognizes Brandon and his father out of the bunch.
“That’s great, bud, let us come in and say hi to everyone, can you say hi to Y/N?”
“Hi, thanks for coming.” He gives you a surprising hug.
“Oh! You’re welcome, Andy. Happy birthday.”
He runs back over to his friends and you walk further into the backyard. It was stunning. Grass that led to sand that led to the lake water. A boat parked further down by the docks, and just gorgeous views for miles. The house itself was huge, you couldn’t believe it.
“Harry!” A woman, who you would assume is Paige, comes waking over. She was beautiful. Shoulder length blonde hair, sort of thin, but not quite a stick. She was wearing a yellow sundress. Her and Harry share a slight hug. “He’s eleven.” She pouts.
“He’s eleven.” Harry agrees with a sigh. “Oh, this is Y/N. Y/N this is Paige, Andy’s mum.”
“It’s so nice to meet you.” She says to you. “Let me take that for you, thank you for bringing him something. I’ll put this with the others.” She takes the box from you. “There’s wine and beer for the adults if you like, but we also have soda and water if you’re not up for drinking. I certainly had a glass after my folks showed up.”
“Did your mother put her white glove on and see if there was any dust?” Harry teases her.
“She may as well have.” Paige rolls her eyes.
Harry puts his hand on the small of your back and leads you closer into the party.
“This is a lovely home.”
“Oh, thank you. I sort of inherited it. It’s was my grandparents’.” She sets your gift on the table with the others. “There’s snacks inside and outside. Feel free to hangout wherever.”
“Where exactly are your parents?” Harry asks.
“Up on the deck.” Paige points up towards it. “Feel free to avoid them as long as you like. They’re speaking with Noah’s parents at the moment. My sister should be here soon.” She looks at her watch. “I’m gonna go check on some things.”
“Alright, love, thanks.” They smile at each other. You get a bad taste in your mouth hearing him call her love, for whatever reason. “Wanna meet some of the parents. I know that guy, Ed, the best. He’s Brandon’s dad, Andy’s best friend.”
“Sure.” You nod and Harry leads you over. “I never quite understood why some parents stay at kids parties.”
“Well…look around you, wouldn’t you wanna hang for a bit?”
“Got me there.”
“Harry, hi.” Ed shakes Harry’s hand.
“Good to see you, this is my friend Y/N, we work together at the university.”
“Hi.” You shake his hand.
“Great to meet you. Brandon was so excited when he got the invite. He and Andy get along so well.” The three of you watch them and the other kids playing tag.
“Born to be friends I’d say.” Harry says.
“Uncle Harry!” A young girl comes running over to Harry and he picks her up, kissing her check, and then setting her down.
“Hi, Rachel, can you say hello to my friend Y/N?”
“Hello.” She beams up at you, a couple of teeth missing. “My grammy and grampy are here.”
“Are they?” Harry says.
“Mhm, I love them a lot.”
“I’m sure they love you too, sweetheart. Are you having a good time for Andy’s birthday?”
“Yeah! We’re going to have a water balloon toss soon.”
“Oh, that’ll be fun!”
“Daddy said he’d be on my team for it.”
“Well, that’s good.”
She smiles again and then runs off.
“Your ex’s boyfriend’s daughter calls you Uncle Harry?” You ask.
“Yeah…she sort of started doing that on her own. She knows I’m Andy’s dad, but I don’t think it quite registers with her yet how we’re all mixed together.” He runs a hand through his hair. “Can I get you anything to drink?”
“A glass of white would be great, thank you.” Harry nods and leaves you standing with Ed.
“So, how long have you and H known each other?”
“Well, I started working at the university last August, so less than a year. We’re office neighbors.”
“Ah, how nice. He’s a really great guy, isn’t he? I coach the boys’ basketball team and he was the first to sign up for snack duty.”
“He’s definitely always thinking of others.”
“How long have you been seeing each other?”
“Oh, um, we’re not.” You shake your head. “He just asked me to come with him, ex in laws, you know?”
“Shit, I’m sorry for just assuming.”
“It’s alright.” You assure him. Harry comes over with a glass of wine for you and a bottle of beer for him.
“Sorry that took a moment, I ran into Noah inside and had to do the hellos. Still managed to not bump into Paige’s parents though, so that’s good.” He chuckles, taking a sip from his drink.
“Bad blood?” You ask.
“Even though things between Paige and I are perfectly fine, in their eyes, I’m always going to be the guy that got her pregnant and didn’t make an honest woman out of her.”
“That’s annoying.”
“Very.”
An hour or so passes and then Paige announces that the balloon toss will be beginning soon.
“Dad, be my partner?”
“You got it, buddy. Mind holding my drink?” He says to you.
“Not at all, have fun.” You smile.
More people had come down off the deck so they could watch. Some parents partnered with their kids, and other kids just partnered with kids. Everyone starts about a foot apart. This should be fun, you think, knowing Harry’s competitive nature.
“Would you look at Harry, he looks like an old man from Florida.” You hear a woman scoff.
“Notice how he’s been avoiding us, always a child.” You hear a man say, and this makes you turn towards them. They must be Paige’s parents.
Everyone playing was further apart now, some balloons had popped, but Harry and Andy were still in the game. The balloon pops at Rachel’s feet and she giggles loudly. There were only a few people now. You watch as Harry lobs the balloon perfectly to Andy, and Andy catches it with ease. It was Brandon and his dad vs. Harry and Andy now. Brandon overthrows it, causing the balloon to pop on the sand.
“We won!” Andy shouts running towards Harry.
“Great job.” Harry jostle’s Andy’s hair. Everyone cheers for them.
“What do you say, honey, cake and gifts now?” Paige asks Andy.
“Yeah.” He smiles.
All of the kids sit around a large glass table while Paige goes inside to get the cake. Harry walks back towards you and you hand him his beer.
“What were you saying about you have no coordination?”
“I had to win, it’s his birthday.” He laughs and then stops when he sees Paige’s parents. “Lydia, Nathan, how are you?”
“Oh, are you speaking with us now?” Lydia says playfully, giving him a hug. Harry shakes Nathan’s hand.
“You know how it is when you first get to a party, lots of excitement. I’d find you eventually.” He clears his throat. “This is Y/N, we work together at the university.”
“Hello.” You smile and they both look you up and down.
“How nice for you to bring a friend.” Nathan says, his tone laced with sarcasm.
“I’m gonna go see if she needs help with the cake.” Harry says to all of you, and you also decide to move away from the rude people you were standing with.
Paige and Harry stand on either side of Andy’s chair as everyone sings happy birthday. After cake the gifts come out. Noah takes Harry into the garage to grab the bike.
“Alright…this one is from…Y/N!” Paige says brightly as she hands the gift to Andy. He tears the wrapping paper off and gasps.
“Alright! A new basketball, thank you!” Andy says looking in your direction and you nod with a smile.
“Okay, Andy, Dad and I got you something really special.” Paige says pointing over to Harry who was wheeling the bike over. Andy’s jaw drops.
“Are you serious?!” He stand up and walks over to the bike.
“Know you’ve been wanting it for a while, and your grades have just been so good this year, we just had to do it. Mum’s got a new helmet, elbow and knee pads for you in the house.”
“Thank you so much!” He hugs Harry and then he hugs Paige.
“You’re more than welcome, baby doll.” Paige says to him and then he squirms away from her.
“Mum.” He huffs.
“Right, sorry, not in front of your friends.”
Paige’s sister helps her clean up the remains of the cake while the kids continue to play yard games. You find yourself sitting in a lawn chair when a man you have yet to meet takes the chair next to you, but you recognize him as Rachel’s father.
“We haven’t gotten to meet yet, I’m Noah.” He shakes your hand.
“I’m Y/N, nice to meet you.”
“Likewise.” He smiles. “I was happy to hear Harry was bringing someone with him. Takes a bit of the pressure off.”
“Exactly.” You nod.
“How’d you meet?”
“We’re office neighbors, I started working at the university less than a year ago.”
“Oh! Right, you went hiking with them last weekend.” He says in understanding. “Andy told us. He’s quite the gossip.”
You observe Noah as he speaks. His hair has turned to salt and pepper, definitely had crow’s feet, also wore glasses, but he had a warm and inviting smile, similar to his daughter’s.
“He certainly speaks his mind.” You chuckle. “He’s very sweet though, I have to say.”
“Very sweet. He’s a good kid. It’s nice for Rach to have someone to grow up with a little She adores him, definitely sees him as a big brother.”
“That’s good. I’ve always found blended families to be interesting. You all are doing it well.”
“Took us a while to get to this point, but it’s all been worth it.”
“Y/N?” You both turn to look at Harry. “Party’s starting to dissipate a bit, are you about ready to head out?”
“Sure!” You stand up. “It was nice talking to you.”
“Same here.” Noah stands up and gives Harry a thumbs up without you seeing.
You both say your goodbyes, Andy gives you another hug and says thank you again for the gift. Harry tells him he’ll see him Sunday night, and then you head to his car.
“Hope you didn’t mind when I had to leave to chat a couple of times.”
“Oh, it was fine. I enjoyed just hanging out. It was a beautiful day.” The sun was just starting to set.
“Yeah, I’m glad the weather was nice. I think it’s supposed to rain tomorrow.” He looks at you and then gets his attention back on the road. “You really did look nice today.”
“Thank you, Harry.” You smile and give his shoulder a squeeze.
“Am I…taking you straight home?”
You blink a couple of times before looking at him.
“Where else would we go?”
“Well, I’ve got a back deck of my own. We could sit out, enjoy the sunset…if you want.”
“That sounds nice, actually. Yeah, let’s do that.” You smile.
“Great.”
You notice his jaw and shoulders relax. Were you making him tense? You both listen to the music on the radio as he drives you to his home. You smile as he pulls up. It was a decent size ranch. Cream color paneling and red shutters, very cute.
“Here were are.” He says awkwardly as you both get out.
“Do I get a tour?”
“Of course!”
He unlocks the front door and leads you inside. There was an open concept kitchen and living area. The house smelled like fresh coffee. He noticed you taking a whiff.
“I have an automatic air freshener.” He says and you nod.
“I like it, should get one for my place.”
“There’s a full bath down the hall, Andy uses that, and then I have my own bathroom. Three bedrooms totally, and then you can see I technically have two levels, that’s what I use for my office.”
“It’s a huge loft.”
“Yeah, it’s partially why I bought the place. I didn’t feel cramped. Basement’s partially finished which will be great for Andy when he’s over if he wants to have parties or whatever. Uh, and then the deck is this way. Can I get you anything…I only have red wine, I know you like white…”
“Red’s fine, maybe just put an ice cube in it for me?”
“Can do, make yourself comfortable outside.” He smiles.
You slide the glass door open and smile. It was a decent sized deck. There was a small glass round table with chairs, a grill, and some Adirondack chairs as well. You sit in one of those after taking a glance at the flowers and plants he had in pots. You also notice the various flower beds he had in the yard.
“Here you go.” He says, sitting down next to you, handing you the glass of wine.
“Thank you.” You smile and take a sip. You cross your cardigan over yourself.
“Are you cold? I can get a blanket.”
“Oh, no I’m fine, thanks. It’s beautiful out here.”
“Thanks, took me a while to get it landscaped the way I like.” He lights the citronella candle on the small table between you to help keep any bugs away. “I’ve been thinking of getting an above ground pool for Andy, he loves to swim, but it’s a lot maintenance, and his mum as the lake right there.”
“That house is incredible.”
“Noah’s helped her revamp it quite a bit, and the boat’s his.” He takes a sip of his drink and looks at you. “Thanks again for coming today.”
“Of course, I had a really good time.” You smile.
“You’re not just saying that?”
“Not at all. It was nice to finally meet the people you’ve told me so much about.”
“Are you hungry or anything? I could bring some-“
“Harry.” You put your hand over his that was resting on the arm of the chair. “Relax, yeah? I’m all set, thank you.”
“Alright.” He blushes and looks straight ahead. You notice him check an app on his phone. “Are you free Tuesday morning?”
“I think so, why?”
“Weather’s looking good, how about we go on one of those longer hikes?”
“I’d like that.” You smile. “Anything special I’d need to back.”
“Just a lunch, maybe some T.P.”
“You’re funny if think I’m going to take a piss in the woods.”
“Everyone does it.” He shrugs. “Don’t worry, I’d keep lookout for you.”
“You men have it so easy, you can just whip your things out, go quick, and you’re all set. Me, I’d have to roll my pants down, squat, hope none of it got on my shoes, wipe, and then get dressed again.”
“I’ve had to do that before, sometimes you just need to take a shit in the woods.” You burst out laughing at that. “Course that only happened because I went out drinking the night before.”
“Good to know.” You wipe a tear from your eye. “But seriously, I’d love to go hiking with you Tuesday.”
“I know it was more so Andy that invited you on our little camping trip, but you’re welcome to join in on that if you feel comfortable.”
“I would just feel like I’m intruding on your quality time.”
“You wouldn’t be, he likes you…um…I like you.” Your head snaps in his direction and your eyebrows shoot up. “I mean, like, I like hanging out with you, is all.” He was internally cringing at himself.
“I like hanging out with you too.” You swallow. “I’m glad we’ve gotten to know each other so well. You’ve been a great help with my classes. You’re so progressive, not always using the same syllabus and being willing to make things work for the students. It’s refreshing.”
“Please, go on, the narcissist within me is loving it.” He smirks and you roll your eyes. “Don’t sell yourself short, you’re doing really well. I enjoyed observing your rhetoric class. It was a nice refresher. I hope you won’t work yourself to much this summer. I know it’s more time for research and writing, but it’s also time for you to clear your head.”
“Thanks, I’ll try to keep that in mind.” You finish off your wine just as the sun it setting, the light from the candle being the only thing to keep things bright enough to see.
“I can, uh, bring you home now if you want.”
“I could just get an uber so you don’t have to go out again.”
“Don’t be silly, it’s no trouble.”
Harry drives you home, and you find yourself lingering in the car.
“So…Tuesday?”
“Tuesday.” He smiles. “Bright and early.”
“How early?” You raise an eyebrow.”
“How’s six sound? I’ll come pick you up, we’ll get to the trailhead by 6:30. It’s always better to summit earlier in the day.”
“You’re the expert.” You shrug. “Works for me.”
You both lean across the console to give each other a hug a goodbye, like you normally would, only this time…you press your lips to his cheek before getting out of the car. His gaze stays fixed on you, and it’s not until you’re inside your building where he lightly presses his fingers to his cheek to feel where you kissed him.
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royalwhumpness · 3 years
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This is a very long post I wrote in celebration of Ace Week and me finding a new label. I'll put it all under the cut, thank you if you take the time to read it <3.
We are nearing the end of Ace Week and during this time I’ve been thinking a lot about my sexuality. Of course, I think about it almost all the time. It’s always been something I’ve never felt completely grounded in. I’m sure there are plenty of others that feel this way. Some people reject labels for this very reason; it seems to keep you separate from all the other labels you might feel describe you. There is also this stigma that you must only choose one label as well, which can further alienate you from labels in general.
Ace Week has been fantastic. I’ve learned a lot about the ace spectrum and have been introduced to a lot of new terminologies. The people in the ace community are so genuine, welcoming, warm, inviting, and understanding. Unfortunately, as with most communities, people can get territorial, hostile, and make someone feel outcasted. In the LGBTQ+ community, this happens to more people than we’d like to admit. I will get into this a bit more here in a minute. But, out of every group, I’ve never felt so cared for like I have when I talk to my ace friends. They bring you in from the cold, set you by their fireplace, stick a cup of warm hot tea or coffee (so accommodating!) in your hands, and put on some comforting music. They ask if you’d like to see their dog or cat or whatever reptile child they have, and they make sure you feel warm, safe, and welcomed. If you’re questioning that you might be ace, they never sneer. They simply bring out their chalkboard full of information and go over all of it with you so YOU can make the distinction, and they never judge you based on your outcome. This sort of hospitality is rare when it comes to labels and self-identification. I’ve never understood the mindset that each label is a closed club, that you’ll have to match rules and guidelines specifically in order to join. With so many gatekeepers, it’s easy to be dissuaded.
Earlier I mentioned the issue with the LGBTQ+ community being a little closed-minded when it comes to different aspects of sexuality and gender identity and whether their acronyms belong. I don’t want to get into that fight, but it’s no secret that it exists. Unfortunately, bisexuals, pansexuals, trans people, ace spec people, and more, all fall under that umbrella of outcasts. I used to identify as Pansexual, I don’t anymore because of the arguments that fall around using that term. When I did use it, I was told multiple times, to my face, that I wasn’t real. I’ve also been called biphobic for using pan. So, in the end, I felt shunned from describing myself as pan. Not to mention the term “Pansexual” never really sat well with me anyway, it was just what I knew existed at the time that explained me a little better than other labels.
Anyway, fast forward some years and I’ve just resulted to calling myself fluid. Even then, fluid never seemed to fit either. It didn’t feel stable, it didn’t feel like a label. And who cares about labels anyway right? Well, I thought I didn’t, until this week. I anonymously asked someone here a question about some aspects of myself and is there a term on the ace spectrum that could fit me. You know what happened? They were extremely respectful, informative, and they gave me a few terms to look up. If it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t have found something that I finally feel explains me.
It’s so hard to move through the world without something to explain yourself with. If you don’t have the words, it’s frustrating, isn’t it? Words are powerful. That’s why labels are important, and I’ve finally figured it out. When you’re traveling for so long not understanding yourself, not knowing if anyone around you could understand you, and you're trying so desperately to grasp onto this label and that label just to feel as though you belong somewhere; but then being cast out because you don’t belong “enough”... it’s disorienting, disheartening, and lonely. FRUSTRATING.
When I found this label, let me tell you, I nearly cried. It felt like I was finally understood! I’ve never heard this term before, I never knew it existed, but I’m glad it does. I’m glad I’m not the only one and I’m glad I can be a part of something.
Abrosexual.
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I’ll link below some information on Abrosexuality.
lgbt wiki web MD MGB Relationships Definition Dictionary.com
It is on the ace spectrum and I gotta say, I’m extremely proud of that. Now does this mean I can’t adopt other labels? No. If you have one label or many labels, you’re no less valid than anyone else. (I found out that there is also Abrogender, and OH MY GOD if that isn’t EXACTLY what I feel like… I wanted to keep this topic on the sexuality aspect which is why I won’t go too far into it.)(Also I'm abroromantic, so basically, I'm all over Abro and I'm in love with that.)
Thank you ace community for being so helpful and kind. I hope you all had a very exciting Ace Week, and that you felt validated, and loved, and welcomed, as you should be. There is so much to the Ace community that I highly recommend EVERYONE do their research and learn the different terminologies. (Like aesthetic attraction, what a good term!!!!) Thank you whump community too. A lot of whumpers here are ace and I just LOVE it. It’s the best two communities (if I do say so myself) combined to make one ultimately amazing community.
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Nominations are LIVE!
Time to get to nominating this year’s delicious rare pairs!
When nominating, please fill in “Mass Effect – All Media Types” in the fandom box.
As a reminder, both gen (&) and romantic (/) relationship tags are allowed for this exchange. Any relationship that fulfils the criteria below is eligible! If you have any questions, please don’t hesitate to ask the mods!
ELIGIBILITY RULES:
A pairing must have 200 or less works when viewed with completed works OR
NEW: A pairing may have over 200 works, but when viewed with completed works and otp:true parameters, the amount of remaining works is both under 200 and less than 1/3rd of the total number of works. 
For Example:
* If Adrian Victus/Steve Cortez has 138 works, then it will be accepted as it has less than 200 works. No further filtering is needed.
* If Volus God (Self-Declared)/Liara’s Hanar Half-Sister has over 200 works, but when searched with the above parameters, only has 5 works, it would be allowed as it would have met the under the 1:3rd ratio rule.
* If Brooks/Krogan Wondering About Fish on the Citadel has over 200 works, but when searched with OTP: true and completed works parameters, has 100 works, then it would not be allowed, as the ratio between the completed works and completed works with just the pairing (otp:true) would be too high to qualify. This new rule is meant to help pairings that are commonly used as “side pairings” but rarely are featured in works where they are the focus.
If you have any questions on those rules or you just want to hang out and talk Mass Effect pairs beyond the most popular ones, consider joining us at Our Discord server. It’s a great place to hang out and talk rare pairs.
If this is your first year or you just want a  guide to find out how to do nominations, please read below:
1) Go to the Ao3 Tagset Page for Spectre Requisitions while logged into Ao3. A tagset is what most Ao3 fan exchanges use to determine what relationships (in Spec Rec’s case) or other criteria are used for an exchange.
If a pairing is not nominated, it will not be able to be used for sign-ups, regardless of whether it would have been eligible otherwise. (Example: Suvi/Chakwas, while certainly being eligible as far as total works go, won’t be an option to ask for if it’s not nominated.)  
If you don’t have an Ao3 account, contact the mods, we’ll be happy to help you get one with an invite link!
If you do have an AO3 account and you’re logged in, you should see this button in the corner that says “Nominate”:
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2) Click the Nominate Button.
You should wind up with a page that looks like this, with 1 fandom tag and lots of relationship fields to fill out:
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3) Fill out the Nominations Sheet.
For fandom, please use “Mass Effect - All Media Types”. We only use Mass Effect - All Media Types because it gives us the highest chance of getting that sweet, sweet Mass Effect content in there regardless of potentially sticky couples (for example: crossovers between a book and a game, or between the Mass Effect Trilogy and Andromeda, or crossovers between other media and Mass Effect) and because Ao3 frankly doesn’t like it when we have couples wandering through different fandoms in the tagset. For Relationships, any pairing/threesome/moresome that meets the eligibility rules. For most pairings, Ao3 should help autocomplete it for you -- but if you come up with a very original pairing (or AO3 is feeling unhelpful), it may require you to type in the full thing. If it does not auto-complete, don’t worry - you can still submit it! Pairings should be in alphabetical order of names. One pairing per line, please!
4) Submit your Nominations! Just click the button on the bottom, and you should be off off and away!
FAQ:
How can I tell what is under 200 completed fics? I’m not a mind reader, C-sec officer!
You can search AO3′s tags here to find pairings for a given character (canonical only gives you pairings big enough that Ao3 has declared them canonical categories). It should look something like this:
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If you see a number under 200 here, you’re golden! Submit away. If it’s over 200 here, however, don’t despair - check the completed works. For example, let’s look at this couple, Garrus/Tali:
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Doesn’t look eligible if you just do a tag search. However, if you click the tag and then do a search for completed works only and you might be surprised!
To do this search for completed works, look at the “Sort and Filter” sidebar and scroll down until you reach the “More Options” field and under “All Works”:
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Click complete works only. And in this case, you’d find this couple is, in fact, eligible!
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However, let’s say you look at the couple and find they are still over 200, as in the example below?
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Well, there is one last thing to check:
Go back to the sidebar, then down to More Options and scroll down to “Search within results”:
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OTP: True will show you ONLY the works that are tagged with JUST the target couple. When you sort and filter, you will see a total. In this example’s case, that number is 30:
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What this means is that off the 204 works in Garrus/Tali right now, only 30 only focus on Garrus/Tali as a couple. As a result, the ratio of otp:true works to completed works is less than 1/3rd of the total, and the couple would be allowed to participate.
What if I accidentally nominate something that’s not eligible? Will I get in trouble?
Nah. You might wind up with it being rejected, but we assume most people operate in good faith in their nominations. If we reject a couple, we will always put it in the spreadsheet for the year linked on the sidebar with a reason why.
How many things can I nominate?
10 pairings - so choose carefully what you’d like to see and write. That covers both Andromeda and Trilogy, and all the novels, comics, etc.
Can I nominate, even if I’m not sure I’ll sign up or don’t plan on signing up?
Of course! Nominating isn’t a binding process - you’re only voting for what you’d like to see. You don’t have to sign up after nominating things - in fact, nominations are anonymous, so we can’t tell what you’ve nominated.
Are there any special rules/restrictions on what I can/can’t nominate?
Only the eligibility rules.
Can I nominate Original Characters?
Yes - ish. We allow original characters who are defined enough to give the person who matches on the original character something to go on, but not so much so they have to do an exhaustive amount of research on a fanon character. For example:
Allowable OC nominations:
Female Asari Spectre/Female Cerberus Agent - both these roles are defined in terms of what category of pairing they want (f/f), and the two roles give someone an idea of who these people are without being excessively limiting.
Not-so-allowable:
Communications Officer/Male Original Character: both of these are too vague. We’re not sure whether this person wants a male, female, nonbinary, or other gender for the Communication’s Officer; Male Original Character is so nebulously defined that we’re not sure just who that might be.
Female Shepard/Batarian(s) - We don’t know who these batarians are, or how many of them there are. “Five Male Batarian Pilots” tells us a lot more.
Male Shepard/Legion/Ebony Raven Darkmayne (My OC) - While we encourage you to add details about your Shepards or other OCs, it’s very hard to write for original characters someone else has formed. Please nominate your OC in more generic terms (ex Male Shepard/Legion/Female Original Goffic Hogwarts Student).  You can add in names and descriptions in optional details in your sign up, but this way the writer or artist has more wiggle room for what will suit their fic or art, and you have more options of matching more people since you aren’t limited to one interpretation of a concept.
A good rule of thumb is if you can sum up an OC in five non-name nouns, it’s probably a valid nomination.
Can I nominate crossovers?
Yes! Crossovers between different Mass Effect properties are welcome and and are crossovers between ! Just please, if the character you’re crossing over doesn’t hail from a Mass Effect canon, add in the canon next to the character name, eg “Darth Vader (Star Wars)/Garrus Vakarian.”
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theterrorzine · 4 years
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About the Project
Love in the Time of Scurvy is a full-colour physical anthology of fanworks inspired by AMC’s The Terror (2018), to be released in the fall of 2021. The main theme of the project focuses on relationships between the characters, platonic or romantic, during the show’s canon era. The works will encompass illustrations, short comics, prose, and more. The goal of the project is to create a physical fanbook of at least 100 pages that will be publicly available for purchase and distribution. If the zine does not generate enough interest during the pre-order stage, it will be distributed digitally as a PDF.
Our main zine will be a physical book with a maximum T-rating. We will also have a bonus PDF featuring NSFW content (title TBD) which will be available as an add-on to different tiers.
Pre-orders for the zine are expected to go live in July 2021. Any profit we make (minus production, shipping costs, and contributor compensation) will go to charity. At this stage we are researching potential choices within environmental and climate change focused institutions working within the Arctic regions. If you have any suggestions as to what charity we could donate to, please do let us know.
General FAQ:
What is a zine? A zine is a printed & bound magazine or fanbook created by fans for fans. It’s full of art, prose, and other fanworks. Physical zines can come with assorted merchandise items available for purchase, such as charms or stickers.
Who is behind this zine? The list of our mods can be found here.
What is the schedule for this project? Our detailed schedule can be found here.
What types of content are you looking for? We are looking for illustrations, short comics (1-4 pages), prose (between 1,500 and 2,500 words), and other fanworks. The latter can include, but are not limited to, knitting patterns, poetry, recipes, etc.
What do you mean, “relationships” ? With the title of the zine as guiding inspiration, we’re looking for any and all works that center on love between Terror characters. Friendship, romance, family, crushes, OT3s+ are all fair game.
Is this a canon-compliant zine? Will modern AUs be allowed? We are looking for works that take place during the Terror’s canon historical era, HOWEVER we are absolutely open to (and in fact encourage) canon-divergent AUs/rescue AUs/fix-its.
Will there be any sort of extras/additional merchandise? We are aiming to have a selection of different types of merchandise available alongside the zine, including (but hopefully not limited to) stickers, postcards, and keychains.
Can I contribute if I am under 18?
We will only be accepting submissions from creators who are 18 or older.
Can international creators participate, and will books be shipped internationally? Yes to both! We will have two distribution centres for the zine, one in the US and one in the UK, to cover most of the world for shipping at as low a cost as possible.
Can I contribute to Love in the Time of Scurvy anonymously or under a pseudonym? Yes! We are happy to accommodate people who would like to remain anonymous with the works they submit to the project.
Are traditional works okay? Yes! As long as you can scan them or take a photograph that will fit the technical specifications of the zine, you are welcome to submit traditional works.
How many contributor spots are you looking to fill? We don’t have a number set in stone yet, but we are looking at somewhere around 40-50 in total.
What is the selection criteria for contributors?
We will base our selection on the following factors:
Quality of provided sample works
Uniqueness of the proposed ideas for zine pieces
Proportion of each relationship within the zine
Balance between types of work (illustration/writing/other)
What does this mean? It means that first we will look at the skill level of the applicant, then at the scene/scenario(s) they are proposing, followed by how many similar ideas are being pitched, and whether they are for art or fic or other types of work. We expect that in many cases the decision will be based on the quality of provided samples and balancing relationships represented within the zine. If you have any questions regarding this, please let us know!
Will zine contributors be compensated? Yes, the goal is to provide all contributors with free copies of the zine, as well as merch. If our profits end up significantly lower than expected, contributors will be allowed to purchase at a discount instead of receiving the goods for free.
How will you be sending communications to creators? The primary point of contact will be via email, although we will be cross-posting all announcements to a contributor-specific Discord server.
What will be the final size/file specs for the physical zine? We are aiming for a B5 or A5 sized book. All art files must be delivered at 300dpi in CMYK, and submitted in either .jpeg or .psd file format. All artists will be provided with a template to work from. All prose works must be delivered in .txt, .docx, or .pdf file format. All text formatting for the zine will be handled by the zine mods to achieve uniform appearance throughout the book.
All of this sounds great, I want to contribute! Where can I sign up?
You can sign up here! :)
For other questions people have sent us, check out our #FAQ tag, or feel free to send any questions via ask or email us at [email protected]!
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moved-attre · 4 years
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Here is my review of Cyberpunk 2077! It is a bullet point list of what I liked, and did not like about the game. I mean no offense in my writing, and am, of course, willing to be educated if I am wrong about anything! But please do not send me anonymous hate. I know many fans and haters of this game can be very, uh... So take it all with a grain of salt, and form your own opinions.
This is very long and likely boring so if you manage to make it to the end, I will be very impressed! Also, I may ramble or repeat myself, sorry. There’s more bad points than good, since the game is very glitchy and I couldn’t not mention the glitches I have experienced.
Obviously, this contains major spoilers! 👁👄👁
I’ll start off by saying, this is a game where you will likely not get what you expected. If you expected Cyberpunk 2077 to be a game filled with features that were never before seen, to revolutionise the gaming industry as we know it and become the most iconic video game ever made... You will not get that. If you expected it to be the worst, most irredeemable video game ever created that you’ll hate... You will not get that, either. If you expected a game that is a fairly standard RPG with some impressive graphics when played on a high spec PC, albeit with some bad glitches and a wonky story with lots of potential, then you’ve got it!
Pros:
The majority of the voice acting, such as in V, Johnny and Viktor, was very good and emotional. Viktor in particular made me tear up! And the way V manages to sound almost like Johnny with the subtle accent change was amazing!
The character’s such as Takemura, Jackie, the LIs, Johnny, Viktor, Misty (I could go on) and even many random NPCs were interesting! I wanted to know them and loved their relevant missions. The best ones were unromanceable, of course, but that’s what imagination is for.
THE ALDECALDOS! I love them! A found family, and I wish there was more to do with them other than Panam’s missions and a few side missions. I love found family, and I’m disappointed V couldn’t form their own, so I’ll take what I can get and love the Aldecaldos, even if V can’t join them until the very end. Panam had the best missions of all the LI’s, even if the last one felt very abrupt. (At least, on her friendship route.)
Night City felt alive. There was always plenty going on, it felt like a real city, and it could be beautiful.
Jackie and Corpo V’s friendship was lovely. I loved their “To this!” inside joke, and I loved how Jackie roasted V but would jump to their defence in a second. It didn’t feel forced at all.
There’s lots of environmental storytelling. The atmosphere of a city choking to death under it’s own pollution/corruption was very apparent in the areas not lived in by the rich. Lots of homeless characters, violence, drugs, absolute poverty, trash (The dump! I felt sick just looking at it, and I couldn’t even smell it! Poor V, though.) and general apathy from a lot of the residents really sold the concept.
Johnny and V’s dynamic was the best part of the story! I hated him at first, but slowly came to enjoy his commentary and advice. His interactions with V were very funny at times, and thoughtful at other times. He was an interesting perspective for the player to consider, while still being an asshole you could dislike for much of the story. He has some really emotional scenes and I played a V that viewed him as a friend, so it was really nice hearing him call V the closest person he’d ever had. They became so devoted to each other! CDPR did good with this element, but I can’t help wishing for more. The dynamic had so much more to give, and a romance/happy ending could have worked.
And to add on, the mission where Johnny takes over V’s body to go on a bender was great! I loved all the moments to play as Johnny in V’s body. All the symbolism between them was so good. Every mission matters, and you can replay to look closer at details! He also comments on other side missions with no personal relevance to him, which was neat.
All the enemies had unique names. A minor detail, but it made me feel some guilt over killing them. 🤣 I think all character’s had unique names, which is such a nice detail.
The soundtrack was incredible, I loved every original piece and radio song. I have several saved on Spotify, which is big praise coming from me! I very rarely listen to video game soundtracks.
V can adopt a cat! 🐈‍⬛ It was adorable, and Johnny’s interaction with it made me tear up!
The size of the map was good, not too big or too small. I got about 100 hours of play in by exploring, which is pretty good to me! I got lost a few times, but always found something interesting to do in the meanwhile. I loved the Badlands especially. 
Some of the side missions, particularly the more mysterious ones involving investigating deaths and the cyberpsychos, were very enjoyable! I’m a big slut for mystery, and there were some interesting cases to figure out. I wish we could’ve done missions like that with River, though, especially once he becomes a PI.
I was complaining about the lack of aliens in CP2077, but I suppose we did get a couple space themed missions which was pretty fun. I still want to go experience going into orbit, though. 👽 Or the moon!
Separating voice and body in the CC was a good idea, even if it was handled a little strangely. I’ll talk about this more in the ‘Cons’ section below!
Act 2 was my favorite part of the game, but it blended weirdly with Act 3 and that put me off. I am nostalgic for Act 1, but not eager to replay it because it felt so slow... I’m not sure on this point! I liked Act 2 because the story picked up and I was excited for more, but the more I got wasn’t as I expected. So, yes, Act 2 was good.
The scenery is very beautiful, and sometimes the outside lighting is absolutely perfect. The Arasaka parade mission was lovely to look at. I always stop the car and watch the sunrise/sunset, and I like going out to the Badlands to look at the stars!
An addition to that, is the lighting in some main quest missions. Very noir! It made for some beautiful screenshots. (Of which I sadly can’t share because my game doesn’t record well on medium settings. 😳)
The motorcycles are fun to drive! Mainly because I can zoom in between cars and Jackie’s motorcycle has a lot of sentimental value, as well as other vehicles like Johnny’s Porsche and Jake’s car. You can open the trunk to dump bodies in, which was a cool detail., and each one drives differently!
There could be amazing attention to detail, such as making Jackie look like his mother. I expected his mother to be a randomly generated NPC, but she was completely unique. It’s the minor things like that which stood out to me the most.
The scanner was a fun tool and very useful! I liked being able to find alternative ways to do a mission, it felt more realistic than the standard “massacre everybody, pick up an item and get out” fetch quests normally seen in RPGs. I could sneak in a tunnel or a side door! Perhaps irritating and unnecessary to some, but I liked it. I love utilising every possible option.
The interface color changes if you have Johnny controlling V’s body. Another small but good detail! The game is good with the minor details.
The sex scenes were not... awful. I expected much, much worse! I expected fully animated first person porn. Instead, I thought they were fairly realistic and intended to be romantic. Still very awkward, though, and unnecessary.
When they didn’t glitch, the animations were very good. Not as impressive as I hoped, probably because of glitches, but in line with other AAA games like Horizon Zero Dawn, I suppose? I noticed Judy’s animations in particular as being good, and Johnny had lots of unique ones too!
The clothing options are very fun, I like the holographic items and “Bitch” clothes, hehe. Also including Hijabs! 🧕 Great idea, and more games should do that.
The diversity of the NPCs was welcome. I enjoyed seeing Native American, Asian, Black and Latinx NPCs who weren’t there just to suffer! They would occupy important roles in the story, such as Fixers or friends/romance options for V, so they were pretty much unavoidable! It felt very natural, and they helped Night City feel more realistic.
Adding to that, the different cultures included were interesting too! I liked the Haitian characters in Pacifica.
The photo mode is pretty good. Not as good as I expected, the camera angle presets were useful but the filters weren’t very good. I liked that the photo mode could be used in cutscenes, though! It was standard, and I hope more bits will be added in for it.
A lot of the glitches are hilarious, but I recognise not all will share that opinion so I’m just adding this down here. The T-Posing NPCs are a highlight for me. Call that the Skyrim effect.
Cons:
No NB gender options/No pronoun options. Would they/them have been so difficult to implement?
No body or height sliders. There’s so many fat character’s in the game! Why can I not make my V fat? Or muscular?
Gender restrictive hairstyles and clothes. Come on, guys, it’s 2020/2077! Aren’t we beyond gender restrictive appearance options?
No tattoo parlours, no plastic surgeons and no hairstylists for V to change their appearance. I don’t understand why a CC was included at all, since we spent the majority of the game in first person. It reminded me of Far Cry.
The main story started off strong, albeit slow, picked up in Act 2, then felt very rushed in Act 3. The point of no return was very abrupt! 
The celebrity cameos felt very gimmicky. The one exception to this is Keanu Reeves, who did a very good job as Johnny. Genuinely brought tears to my eyes at times... but Grimes was just embarrassing! Why was she there! A talented VA could have done Lizzy Wizzy much better, giving her actual emotions instead of just monotone “boredom”.
I don’t know what the point of owning apartments is. You can only sleep in V’s bed, what is the point of looking in the mirror? V has no use for their terminal in their apartment, they never get any messages after the first time they meet Johnny. It was so unnecessary, especially when there’s several across the map. I can access the stash of weapons and clothes from my car! Why would I ever need to go home? Judy gives me her apartment and I’m like, girl, I’m never visiting unless you have a mission to give me.
Also, there are no penalties for not showering or sleeping. I wanted character’s to comment on that! Call me stinky or tell me I look exhausted!
V doing side missions makes no sense, and no explanation is given for why we can do them. Why would V, who is dying and has precious few days left to live, be driving for hours on end to deliver packages and shoot random criminals? When they could be figuring out how to survive the biochip! Who the hell would care about a some extra money or buying every available car for sale, when they’re dying of something that could be preventable?
Some side missions were either very poorly done or obviously majorly glitched, since it felt like they skipped important parts and I was often very confused at the end of them! For example, the Corpo V side mission was so short! I expected to be able to hunt down Abernathy and get revenge for V and Jenkins, but instead, I shoot some random assistant I don’t even remember? And that’s it? Done in 2 minutes! If that! What is the point of that? I didn’t even have fun! Also, what happened to Garry? I wanted to save him but V just never follows up on it.
And, I wish we got closure with T-Bug. The fact that V never bothers to find her body and give her a proper burial was just poor form. 
The endings were not... good. There are technically 6 different endings, all wrapped up into 3 parts. In my opinion, the best ending is the one where V kills themselves and has a very “Arthur Morgan watching his last sunset” vibe. It made me cry. Another good ending is having Johnny take over V’s body forever, as you can really see how much Johnny has changed as a person thanks to V’s influence. But they still felt very... eh and the story just never got that boost it needed, ending before it could take off. In the “best” ending, the Nomand ending with Panam, V ”survives” but has only another few months to live. So they die off screen. Satisfying? Uh, no. Not at all. There’s no possible ending where V has any hope of survival, but I much preferred being there with V until the very end. I disagree with the people calling Johnny’s ending the “bad” ending, because it really isn’t! I ignore all of this of course, and my V is living happily ever after.
I kind of hate that CP2077 has this illusion of options when some are clearly intended to be chosen more than others. Judy and Panam have the best endings in term of romance. Why bother with River and Kerry? Kerry is more of a fling than an actual romance, and is met very late in the game at a point where you can ignore him completely and just end the game, and River’s romance is so glitched that many people can’t even do it fully, and in every ending he dumps you, so it feels like none of it mattered to him despite him being the most “domestic” of the possible LI’s...
Takemura’s ending! He died in my playthrough, because the game didn’t tell me I could save him. That really annoyed me. Also, I recognise that V is in no place to lecture him, and there is some wisdom to his quote: “You speak against corporations yet offer no valid alternative.” But, Goro, bro... anything is better than fascist mega corporations keeping most of the city in absolute poverty, while waging devastating wars against other mega corporations? I wish we could have opened his eyes a little. There’s a good, even ground between Takemura believing Corps to be doing the best for humanity and Johnny being willing to kill 12k people for a revolution. This game went a little “capitalism is bad, but the alternative is worse!” at times, in my opinion. I wish more could have been done against the corporations, instead they just kind of... exist... in the background. And I know, “Realism! “ because we live with massive corporations like Amazon in our lives and can do fuck all about them but we’re not V. V is an absolute unit who survives death multiple times... I wish there had been two paths, like do Johnny’s path and work against the system or do Takemura’s path and work with the system? Sort of like The Witcher 2?
You know how in Saints Row, The Boss has homies they can call on for help? I wanted V to have homies to help them out in fights. It felt pointless building trust with the Fixers only to not have them help out at all with fights against the NCPD/Militech/Arasaka in their territories. 
The stealth mechanics are not good. They are funny! But not very good. Often, It’s better to just attack and save yourself the trouble of sneaking only to get caught by a guard who can see through the back of his head.
The fact that you cannot get arrested and have someone bust you out of jail. Maybe RDR2 set my expectations too high, but I thought this would have been included.
I’ve read about the cut content, and I’m really disappointed they weren’t included in the game. Wall running would have been amazing! And the police hiring mercs to hunt V down? I would have loved to see it! 😔
Driving cars is terrible. Just awful. Sometimes, you crash. Other times you’re flung up into the air and break through the sky into the void, spinning for all eternity.
River’s glitched romance deserves a special mention. The relationship just drops off suddenly and you cannot interact with him properly again. It does not affect the main story at all, so you wonder, what was the point? The text messages also glitch and V will sent messages that you can’t control, leading to disappointing dialogue, like with Joss.
The romances in general were just not all that impressive. I was expecting something great, considering there was only 4 and thought they’d really affect the main story, but I’d only recommend Panam and Judy. I would have played the game just as well without romances, and they felt very unnecessary but I wanted to do one to get the most possible story content. I think we should all leave romances in RPG’s as the exception, not the norm. Some studio’s can do them well, other’s cannot. CDPR cannot, in my opinion...
Obviously the many glitches and bugs, several of which are game breaking. I usually have to reload a save at least once an hour, because an NPC won’t talk to me or I can’t move the mouse to select different dialogue options! Or my gun won’t equip, so I die.
The AI in general is very bad. Sometimes cars will stop in the middle of junctions for no reason, causing you to crash or mount the sidewalk to get past, meaning you’ll likely run someone down and get a police warrant. NPCs just walk from one end of the road and back again, over and over on a loop. It’s very creepy!
The lighting, mostly inside buildings. Everything is pitch black! Why does V not own a flashlight? The amount of enemies I’ve barrelled into and alerted because I couldn’t see is too much.
The lack of dialogue choice, it was less interactive than what I’d been told to expect. There was only two or three options, with one only ever rarely being unique to one of V’s three possible background choices and most will yield the same results with a few exceptions, like avoiding combat.
V’s personality is already decided by the game, and is not really customisable. Do not expect full control over your V’s personality, as they are very much a canon character and exist outside of your (limited) choices. I didn’t expect Baldur's Gate 3 levels of customisation, but I did expect something more like Dragon Age 2’s dialogue wheel? Nice, Sarcasm and Angry? You know?
Obviously, the seizure inducing scenes were very dangerous. I get a headache whenever I have to do a braindance, and I wish it was skippable!
Accessibility as a whole is very much an afterthought in this game, I think. The subtitles are in “speaking English”, so instead of: Hey, how are you? It’s: Heyyy, how’re ya? It is often difficult to understand, and sometimes I just couldn’t work out what was being said.
It’s nitpicky but I wanted to do a pacifist route and I realised you can’t, you need to kill certain character’s... 
The main “villains” such as Yorinobu and Adam Smasher were very forgettable, and V had no personal stake in taking them out. I honestly forgot all about them. Takemura was talking about revenge and I’m like, who? Who are you talking about? Why are we kidnapping Hanako Arasaka, again? Johnny, why would I bother killing Adam Smasher? If they’d personally murdered Jackie, then yeah, I’d understand! But all V needs is to remove the chip and I don’t know... I just didn’t feel anything.
So, to summarise: I think CDPR were out of their depth. The long, very long, troubled development process was an indication of this before the game was even released, and the story I’ve experienced in the game is proof enough. I don’t think they knew what they wanted from this game, and as a result, we have a game that is honestly very confusing and frustrating with a story that always got close to gripping, but never quite makes it. All in all, I found this game to be pretty average. When the bugs are ironed out, I will think better of it. But as it stands, if I had to score it, I would give it a 6.5/10 or maybe 7/10. Good concept, somewhat misguided execution. The best part of the game was the Johnny/V dynamic, but I wasn’t satisfied with how it ended. They needed more time together! Anyway, it will be interesting to see what happens next. 
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