#✿ — HOW RARE AND BEAUTIFUL IT TRULY IS THAT WE EXIST ( character parallels. )

[witchcraftt]

tag dump.

[vvizardry-old]

tag dump !

[persephhones-old]

tag dump!

[fdjhskal]

tag dump!

[vvartorn]

tag dump !

[hcckmdaisy]

                   daisy hookum IS leslie knope: a moodboard

daisy: i ate a brownie once. at a party in hogwarts. it was kind of indescribable really. i felt like i was floating. it turns out there wasn’t any marijuana in it, it was just an insanely good brownie.

[shoujoinvestigation]

Our 2020 Drama Recs

What a year 2020 has been - a time of tumultuous change, anxiety and reflection. During this time, dramas have certainly become a safe space for comfort and entertainment. Fortunately, we’ve also seen more and more quality dramas released in 2020!

As we head into 2021, here are our top 2020 dramas picks:

1. Winter Begonia 鬓边不是海棠红 recommended by Admin JY

The story of two seemingly polar opposite characters in 1930s China - a feisty traditionally-trained Beijing opera star and a wealthy Western-educated businessman in a setting where Western influence meets Chinese traditions. Yet when they finally cross paths, their parallels in fact draw them closer to each other. The main characters shine and sparkle both as independent characters with their own depth, flaws and quirks and with their ever-so-natural chemistry interacting with each other, in what could be the most healthy and balanced relationship dynamic I have ever seen between leads.

Winter Begonia presents brilliantly written three-dimensional, human yet relatable characters growing with each other through a time in history of change and uncertainty, in addition to great acting, beautiful costume design, production value and showcase of Beijing opera. If you are looking for a show with drama, history/culture, comedy, family, action (and tragedy), look no further than Winter Begonia for an entertaining yet reflective story of growth filled with all the *feels*.

2. A Murderous Affair in Horizon Tower 摩天大楼 recommended by Admin JL  

What’s your idea of a feminist drama? An ensemble of badass, confident female cast kicking ass and bonding with each other? For Horizon Tower, it is to be concealed in a mystery. Two detectives take us through the life of an attractive cafe owner after her death, retracing it through the eyes of people new to her and old ones who had known her well. They all have various things to say about her - each have a different piece of the full picture. What part of the truth do we trust? How do we, or can we judge her? While women are often expected to be the “perfect victim”, Horizon Tower says, the simple truth is, a victim is a victim, and a crime is a crime, regardless the conduct of the victim.

Horizon Tower is a sophisticated, brilliantly written and directed story. It’s fast-paced, compelling as it plays with multiple facets of the truth. There is no simple dichotomy - of black vs white, of women vs men. Instead, it fundamentally embraces the complexity of human nature - which is what makes it feminist. For me, this drama will stay in my heart as one of the most powerful and brilliant feminist stories to exist. In a time of feminist movements, it feels extra important and meaningful for China to have produced such a drama this year. Thank you for being the voice we all needed, Horizon Tower!

Watch the official episodes, subbed, on Youtube.

3. Hyena recommended by Admin JY

Not quite simply a law drama, nor a “badass” law drama turned into a sweet romance drama - Hyena is great for its culmination of confident writing featuring strong and unique characters that break stereotypes, balanced with a refreshing focus on morally ambiguous law cases.

Just as much as the focus was placed on the well-paced and exciting stakes in  the legal cases featured, the drama always gave space for the characters’ legit explosive chemistry to shine through and be developed further. While KDramas have been attempting to write “badass” female leads, Jang Geum Ja always stayed true to her anti-hero and morally grey character, with her gaudy, loud masculine style, unscrupulousness and shameless ambition to the end - a truly strong and admirable female lead who may not be fully likable. Yoon Hee Jae as the male lead also deserves praise as a more sensitive and softer portrayal of a privileged and powerful male lead, without ever overshadowing others or overstepping his boundaries.

Even as someone who struggles to watch purely-law/detective dramas, there was much to appreciate and enjoy from this drama, with its quality acting, writing and even memorable OST that can only be fully appreciated by watching.

4. The Bad Kids 隐秘的角落 recommended by Admin JL 

This is China’s year of high quality, sophisticated suspense dramas! Alongside Horizon Tower, The Bad Kids is certainly the one which had first carved out that status. Before it was named one of the Best International TV Series of 2020 by Variety, it had already achieved a phenomenal status in China with plenty of good fun memes and incisive meta created.

The success of The Bad Kids, in my opinion, represents creativity and the heart for storytelling triumphing over rigid, spartan censorship. It’s a testament that witty and thoughtful writing is what you need to tell a good story - and even censorship can’t get in the way of this (sometimes). It told a compelling and introspective story threading into moral fallibility while opening up questions to audience about what we perceive and know. This is a rare accomplishment when so many other recent cdrama stories are increasingly sanitised. The auteur-level of directing was vital in shaping the experience as well, down to the quirky selection of music.

So, do you believe in fairytales or reality? :)

5.  Brutally Young 十八年後的終極告白 recommended by Admin JY

How far would you go to hide the secrets from your past to protect your present? - that was the simple but solid foundation that this HK Drama delivered.

A group of high school friends are forced to reunite after 18 years to unravel the mystery of a recently discovered corpse, related to their shared pasts. Through this premise, mystery and suspense unfolds as the characters’ complex motivations and hidden pasts are revealed.

Despite the wide ranging cast, many characters are given good depth and personal arcs for development, and even decent romance feels. The pace of the story is also kept tight and remains consistent and realistic throughout.  Definitely an unexpected dark horse from TVB’s 2020 lineup, worth checking out!

6.  Candle in the Tomb: The Lost Caverns 鬼吹灯之龙岭迷窟 recommended by Admin JL

Okay, after two heavy suspense dramas from me, is there anything more lighthearted to watch? I’m usually not an action/adventure fan, but I’ve been a fan of the remakes of Candle in the Tomb directed by Fei Zhenxiang along with his team, following after the prequel adaptation last year, The Wrath of Time. 

This time, we have Pan Yueming as Hu Bayi, forming the Iron Triangle with Pangzi and Shirley, embarking on a tomb-raiding treasure-hunting adventure. Director Fei makes action digestible and fun to watch, on top of the witty script, great character-writing and performance - true to canon (as far as possible). As far as old fans of the franchise and new ones of the drama know, this is the best remake so far. I’m looking forward to the next instalment, The Worm Valley, likely out early 2021!

Watch the official episodes, subbed, on Youtube.

-

Let us know what your picks for 2020 are!

Written and gifs by Admin JY and Admin JL, unless stated otherwise.

[xbustian]

                CHARACTER PARALLELS    

    Crowley  (  Good Omens   )   ,    Kaz  Brekker   (   Six  of  Crows   )   ,   Faith  Lehane  (  Buffy   )   ,    Roy  Kent  (  Ted Lasso  )    ,   Thomas  Shelby  (   Peaky Blinders   )   ,    Berlin   (   Money Heist  )   ,    Annalise  Keating   (   HTGAWM   )

TIDBITS:

Age   :   20   (  Jan 13   )    

Born    :   Limerick

Father   :   TBD

Mother   :    Azra

Step--Mother    :    TBD

Half-Brother   :   Rodolphus 

SECOND-PERSON HISTORY BITS:

You were born into royalty           the bastard son of a whore, but a Lestrange prince nonetheless, second only to your older half-brother, Rodolphus. Despite the dimpled smile and chubby cheeks, you were nothing but a spare. A safety net. A necessary mistake as your birth mother was sent away with a dark threat lingering over her. Should anyone ask: you were the product of a perfect marriage. You would call the woman who despised you, despised what you reminded her of, MOTHER. 

Despite the circumstances, your father looked upon you with proud features. His chest stuck out and he held his head high as he appraised his two sons like a diamond he would consider buying. But when you burrowed deep within the sheets of your bed, or played those childish games with whatever nanny your mother hired that week, your father was busy appraising other avenues. You didn’t realize this when you were younger, but your father controlled an impressive legacy. He was the captain of a rich and beautiful figurative ship, compared only to the Flying Dutchman. 

He produced fear like a billionaire entrepreneur.

It took a long time for you to realize what exactly your role in the family was. The cavalry, they called you. The warrior who would ride in and save whoever was lost or in danger. You see, as you grew older, and your temper began to surface, your proud parents no longer viewed you as a simple back-up plan. No, you were so much more than that. You were to act as a confidant to your brother          an easy enough task, you thought ignorantly, seeing as you had already taken up the mantle. But the cavalry was a heavy crown to rest upon your head, and you began to feel the weight the more your parents discussed your future. Because even at eleven,  or  thirteen,  or  fifteen,  you could see their definition of  cavalry  change. It adapted the more they viewed your growth. You were too smart, too tough to be thrown in the background. You were made to stand up front with the rest.

You began to feel separated from yourself. People would discuss you, in front of you, and you would think they were bragging about some stranger you never met. You even found yourself thinking, God, this bastard sounds like a total fucking tool. Though you couldn’t exactly blame them. It was your fault, too. Your mind was too curious, too far reaching to listen and merely agree. You read Machiavelli’s The Prince and found power to be something earned rather than inherited.  Were you truly a Lestrange man if you sat back and let royalty wash over you? Or were you nothing but a figurehead without the brains to control them?

While most settled for flattery when it came to life, you settled for fear, because it was always safer than love. To care about someone was to owe them something in return, and you refused to owe anyone. Not your father, not your mother, and certainly not your brother (or so you liked to think). You were a machine: alone and angry, pulling at strings to unravel whatever bullshit people would throw your way. You acted like a proletariat sometimes, wishing your life wasn’t so luxurious and stiff. You wished your parents weren’t so perfect because then you would have a reason to slouch. It was all incredibly moronic. The crown was getting much too heavy and soon, you were drowning.

But then she gave you air to breathe. Harper Macmillan: the exception to every one of your rules. 

You never told her this, but the first time you noticed her was when you were fourteen years old. Sure, you watched her as she was placed in Hufflepuff, mentally noting how cute you thought she was - but it wasn’t until three months into your Charms lesson that she truly embedded herself within the recesses of your mind. Finally succeeding with her charm, she let out a contagious laugh and you couldn’t help but compare the shine of her smile to the stars above.

Harper was as tantalizing as she was beautiful, and you despised the way her surname left a bitter taste in your mouth. The Macmillan family were blood traitors and you could remember every shallow and disgusting thing your parents and their friends have said about them. They are trash, and we would rather them lay dead on the floor than have them so much as look our way, his parents snapped.  

So you were fourteen and you ignored her. You were fifteen and you ignored her. You were sixteen and you ignored her. You were seventeen and your palms began to bleed because Thomas Peak, the stupid mudblood, asked her out. You clenched your fists so hard you barely noticed the way your fingernails dug into your skin. You couldn’t remember feeling so angry. So murderous. 

Your jealousy continued to brew as you noticed how she and her blood traitor friends rarely ever parted. How come she could associate herself with someone so low, and you couldn’t? You complain to yourself, but you know, deep down, that you are held to a much higher standard. But still, the curiosity got the better of you, and when you were seventeen you approached her friend with a question about class, subtly looking over at Harper before saying hello. You pretended not to care. You pretended to acknowledge her with such little interest that you might as well have been speaking to a wall. And when she said hi back? You shrugged. Uncaring. But your heart practically ripped itself out of your chest right then and there, forcing you to rush off the moment her friend finished her answer.

One word. Just one fucking word. Harper Macmillan uttered one word to you and you were convinced she belonged to you. Like a possession. Like the gems your mother would polish, or the money your father would practically swim in. She was yours. Eventually you could look at nothing else, your eyes always washing over her lithe form whenever she walked into a room. She was the most beautiful thing you had ever seen, and you felt no desire to torture yourself by staying away. People swarmed you, treated you like a god, and yet you kept looking only at her. 

And one day  …   she looked back.

No one knew of your relationship - or so you told yourself. You were smart enough to know when to be careful, smart enough to never mention her name. And sure, your anger got the better of you from time to time, resulting in a bloodied mess of any stupid fool who thought it smart to flirt with your girl - the same girl who appeared single to anyone curious enough to look. 

It was your own fault, and you bloody knew it too.

Feeling this way was changing you and you didn’t like it. You felt more open to discussion, often keeping an eye out for Rodolphus simply to ask how he was doing. While a part of you always cared, despite your objections to the matter, you were never so open about it - once having been caught like a deer in headlights when claiming you were proud. A simple scoff and chuckle later and the matter was resolved. You were joking, of course. But you knew, deep down, if you didn’t get control of the matter, you wouldn’t be able to hide it much longer. Over the years, the blonde was slowly erasing what your parents so forcefully cast upon you: your inability to be a human fucking being.

To make matters worse, or better depending on who you asked, you have been secretly in contact with your birth mother. Having given up on ever knowing her, it was a surprise when an owl flew your way, dropping off a letter from the woman you thought was long gone. She never forgot about you - and unlike your other family members, she took a keen interest in your interests. She wanted to know everything about you. Naturally you kept out a lot, inwardly terrified she would be as disgusted with you as you were of yourself. But just like Harper, she was your connection to something safer. Something happier. And the greedy bastard in you won’t let her go. 

Your family can never know. 

PERSONALITY

The man is infamous and rightly so. But despite his reputation, Rab has been known to isolate himself more often than not. Reasonably eschewing human interaction, he uses this time to reflect on himself, his body and its warnings. This is called interoception, and Rab requires this level of perception in order to control his anger and shift it into something more positive. Helpful. With this understanding he is able to exercise full consciousness, therefore limiting the times he allows his temper to roam free.  Furthering this point, this helps guide him when understanding others emotionally. When he is able to better understand his enemies, he is able to view their hopes and aspirations. To know them is to know how to defeat them. 

He is constantly at odds with himself. He prides control over mostly everything and yet he struggles with intense anger issues. He becomes malicious and vindictive, almost blind to the world around him. When Rab sees red, no consequences exist. This is, once again, why he tries his best to remain isolated - until his services are needed, of course. Then he wears a twisted smirk and dances along the line that separates sanity and insanity. Switching back and forth is tiring, and he often disappears for long periods of time following an intense change. People are unaware of where he goes, and they don’t try to find him. 

Even the most feared of students know to give him his space. 

While this may be difficult to see, Rabastan is a family man. Despite the endless deception and bullshit, he continues to side with his immediate relatives. They are his connection to ethos. His reminder that he is human and worthy of being loved. This can be seen as his ultimate weakness. For instance, his father threatened his mother and blackmailed her, and yet he still stands beside his father and shows a form of loyalty that could not be matched. He would die for his family - something they would be all too quick to accept. His devotion to the Lestrange family has nothing to do with their legacy or their name, but rather their blood relations. He has made the mistake of trusting them time and time again only to be disappointed in the end. 

Rab expects disappointment and therefore always has a back-up plan. He can bounce back to an almost pathological degree, wiping figurative (or sometimes literal) blood from his face with nonchalance painted across his features.  He uses his disappointments as a way to empower himself. His limits are constantly being challenged and he has repeatedly come out on top, showing a tenacity that is difficult, if not impossible to duplicate. 

[gffa]

I practically read through the entirety of the STAR WARS Rare Pair 2018 Exchange and, jeez, this fandom just has its hooks in me so hard, I love these characters and this world and the wonderful creativity of the fandom! I may often go back to the same tropes that I always love, but there’s also always something new and interesting, some new corner to explore, some new character or relationship to give focus to, some new AU to help fix things. And fandom is really great about giving me the things I want to read a hundred times over and finding cool new things! So, here, have some both! STAR WARS FIC RECS: TIME TRAVEL RECS: ✦ Asajj Ventress and Her Tiny Time-Travelling Conscience by shadowsong26, asajj & luke & cast, 2.4k wip    We all love time travel fics, right? Here’s one with Luke. Tiny, precious, ten-year-old Luke. Who accidentally travels back in time to the last year/year and a half of the Clone Wars. And lands on Ventress. PREQUELS RECS: ✦ Red Sky at Morning by darth_vaporwave, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka & yoda & plo & quinlan & luminara & cast, 16.8k    Master Ahsoka’s off on a short mission without Obi-Wan, which suits Anakin just fine. There’s something up with Obi-Wan. That last mission he went on by himself, where he got hurt, really took something out of him, and Anakin’s going to figure out what it is. But first, he’s got to figure out why their filing project went so wrong… ✦ untitled by stonefreeak, mace & cast, ~1k    Mace scrubs a hand across his face, trying to keep a clear head even as the council meeting drags on. ✦ Punch-Drunk by bell (belldreams), obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, ~1k    “Am I the only one who’s not gone punch-drunk over fruit?!” Anakin explodes. ✦ Precipice by shadowsong26, anakin & padme & obi-wan & luke & leia & bail & ahsoka & rex & cast, 165.3k wip    An AU in which Anakin Skywalker does not follow Mace Windu and the others to Palpatine’s office after they leave to arrest the Chancellor. As a result, he doesn’t get that final push over the edge, and doesn’t Fall. ✦ Dance Softly Through by Lady_Katana4544, ahsoka/barriss & cast, 3.3k    She’s still reeling from the parasite in her mind and confused about her feelings towards Ahsoka. Barriss hasn’t known the other Padawan long, but she wants to get to know Ahsoka more if they ever have a chance. ✦ Leitmotif by FireflyFish, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, 2.2k    Anakin can hear music that no one else can. Some of it is beautiful. Some of it haunting. But his music? His music is terrifying. ✦ Chosen, not assigned by Lysore, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, 2.2k    “It looks like our problems are solved. Fresh troops, new supplies, and perhaps they brought my new Padawan with them,” Obi-Wan had said. Though there seemed to be a misunderstanding regarding the identity of the Master of said Padawan. ✦ The Last Jedi by FireflyFish, obi-wan & palpatine & cast, 2.3k    “The dark is generous and it is patient and it always wins – but in the heart of its strength lies its weakness: one lone candle is enough to hold it back.” - Revenge of the Sith ✦ To Traverse the Center of Your Heart by JumpingJill, mon/padme & obi-wan & bail & cast, 6.1k    Padmé survives giving birth to the twins. Mon has a front row seat to the fall of the Republic and the rise of the Empire. Somehow, they continue. ✦ Hearing by Bythoseburningembers, obi-wan & anakin & ahsoka, 11.4k wip    Takes place immediately after Crisis on Naboo, and follows Anakin and Obi-wan as they try to heal a broken friendship in the face of lies and a never-ending war. ✦ Every hand’s a winner by MirandaTam, adi & han & qi'ra, 1.6k    Corellia has more than its fair share of troubles. Adi Gallia has more than her fair share of headaches. ✦ Raising Up Hope by dreamiflame, obi-wan/padme, 1.5k    Family is what you make of it. Padmé, Obi-Wan and the twins are trying to make it work. ✦ Stitches and Time by ladyarcherfan3, obi-wan & anakin & qui-gon & ocs, 4k    Alara Nel is a seamstress who keeps getting an unusually large number of orders for Jedi robes from an Obi-Wan Kenobi. Over the years, she learns why and gets to know the Jedi a little bit better. ✦ Balance Point by Vinyarie, anakin & ahsoka, 6.3k wip    Ahsoka wakes up trapped beneath the rubble of the Sith temple on Malachor with the man currently known as Darth Vader. He’s a Sith lord who has done some truly awful things, but she’s certain that some part of him is still Anakin Skywalker, and she’s going to convince him of that. No matter how many times he tries to kill her for it. ✦ Refuge by Ljparis, rainydayadvocate, obi-wan/padme, 2k    On Mustafar, Padmé takes matters into her own hands. Obi-Wan is there for her when the dust settles. ✦ The Pleasures of Life by AngelQueen, obi-wan/padme, NSFW, 6.2k    During her early months as a Senator, an irritating soirée takes an interesting, unexpected turn for Padmé. ✦ Along Our Twisted Path by ambiguously, anakin/ahsoka & cast, nsfw, 12.5k    Ahsoka steps out of the World Between Worlds, but not into the galaxy she remembers. ✦ Difference in Degrees by maebmad, obi-wan/anakin/padme (pre-relationship?) & ahsoka & rex & cast, 8.6k wip    An anthology of stories in a universe that is both better and worse than the one we know, in various ways. It is difficult to sort each part into good and bad, after all, when everything is so often both. Evil is not created overnight. Empires are not built in a day. Good intentions don’t guarantee righteous acts. ✦ he will tear your city down by collegefangirl3791, obi-wan & cast, 11.8k wip    Obi-Wan planned to keep a low profile on Tatooine, after Order 66. He was there to protect Luke, and that was all. ✦ Getting to Know You by ambiguously, thrawn/padme, 2.8k    Padmé has agreed to this. That doesn’t mean she’s happy about it. ✦ Let My Second Love Be Kind by nichestars, obi-wan/padme & cast, 3.1k    When Padmé holds her children in her arms for the first time, she thinks: This is the fewest number of beings with which I have been entrusted since I was twelve years old. ✦ Wedding Braids by skatzaa, bail/breha, 1.7k    Breha meets her reflection’s gaze. She was right: the glow from her pulmonodes turns her dress from pink fabric into a living sunset. But she hadn’t anticipated the way the light would catch on the loops and curls of her wedding braids as they cascade over her shoulders. ✦ Warm me up by Ljparis, bail/breha, 3.1k    After enjoying a brisk winter hike in the mountains of Alderaan, Bail and Breha get trapped at the Antilles’ family cabin during a snowstorm. ✦ The Very Best of Acquaintances by Skyberrie (LyaStark), bail/breha, 1.5k    It wasn’t love at first, second, or even twentieth sight for Bail and Breha. But they managed to get there just the same. OBI-WAN/ANAKIN RECS: ✦ Each Day Is Your Last by Nisa, obi-wan/anakin & mace & dex, NSFW, 15.4k    I have always wanted to write what really happened after the Poster Boy scene in ROTS. ✦ Don’t Let This End by SoftlyFocused, obi-wan/anakin & cast, NSFW, 4.9k    Anakin is frustrated by how devastatingly handsome Obi-Wan looks at one of Padmé’s political parties, he gets drunk to cope. Obi-Wan is frustrated with how needy and demanding Anakin has been, he gets drunk to punish him. Both of them really need to release some tension after this seemingly endless war. ✦ Miasma by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin & rex & cody & fives & kix & cast, sith!obi-wan, 12.6k wip    Obi-Wan never believed his best friend and lover Anakin would die first. But he has. ✦ Nice to Meet You Again by darlingamidala, obi-wan/anakin/padme, soul mates, 3.3k    A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, three people met, and fell into a love so deep that it bound their very souls together for all eternity. ✦ To Be Found by darlingargents, obi-wan/anakin/padme, 7.1k    When Anakin and Obi-Wan are caught during a battle and imprisoned alone for weeks, it leads to some revelations. From Coruscant, Padmé, with the help of Ahsoka, is tracking them down – and coming to some realizations of her own. ✦ A Gift for the Hurting by by Petralice, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 1.9k    I’m not even gonna try to be fancy here; this is self-indulgent Obikin smut. They’re banging, folks. ✦ Bedroom Hymns by JediMistress, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, spanking, bondage, bdsm, d/s, 10.9k wip    Anakin Skywalker is a young student with some kinky interests, and his search for a Dom leads him to Obi-Wan, a former professional. Obi-Wan has retired, but their purely professional kinky relationship changes the lives of both men. How long can they keep it professional? And what happens when they start falling for each other? ✦ 36 Questions by thelivingcontradiction, obi-wan/anakin, 24.9k wip    In a study by psychologist Arthur Aron, they found that strangers would fall in love when asked to answer 36 questions together. ✦ Exile Vilify by nessa_j, obi-wan/anakin, nsfw, 1.4k    Anakin struggles with the horrors of war, Obi-Wan tries to offer comfort. ✦ feening by mexicanfood420, obi-wan/anakin & padme & cast, 15k wip    Anakin Skywalker, an angsty mess of hormones and resentment, is thrust elegantly into the hands of temptation, and is expected to turn down every little thing he’s ever desired. ✦ The Blessed by lilyconrad, obi-wan/anakin/padme, soul mates, 1.4k    Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker can see something few others can, a special gift the Force gives only to those with a soulmate: color. ✦ Saber’s Hilt by lovelykenobi, obi-wan/anakin, NSFW, 2.3k    Anakin’s a boy with a mouth and a sassy attitude. Obi-Wan reacts accordingly. ORIGINAL TRILOGY RECS: ✦ whatever a sun will always sing is you by victoria_p (musesfool), luke & leia & cast, 2.2k    Leia has a lot of things to do, but first, she needs to speak with Luke. ✦ Edges of the World by glompcat, leia & luke & anakin & padme & han & ahsoka & ventress & sana & bail & breha & obi-wan & cast, 228.4k wip    Leia Organa finds herself stuck in a strange alternate/parallel universe where the Empire never came to exist. Meanwhile, trying to navigate a galaxy ruled by the Sith weren’t exactly the Jedi Trials Leia Skywalker had expected. ✦ If That Mockingbird Won’t Sing by ambiguously, obi-wan/beru, 3.1k    Obi-Wan brings Luke to the Lars homestead only to discover Owen Lars isn’t there any more. ✦ Gingerbread Cottage All Covered in Sweets by ambiguously, luke/leia & anakin, NSFW, dark themes, 7.1k    Luke will do anything for Leia, even if it means seducing her to the Dark Side. ✦ Bedtime Stories by kurage_hime, obi-wan & leia & cast, 1.1k    Prompt: Leia being so madly in love with tales of Obi-Wan Kenobi and crushin’ so hard on him IS MY JAM. Doesn’t have to be requited, or happen irl (I don’t mind if it does). ✦ Only In Memory by rainydayadvocate, han/qi'ra & han/leia (sort of implied) & cast, 2.4k    Han, Leia, Luke, and Chewie are on sent on a fuel supply run, and Han suspects the supplier is someone from his past, someone that probably belongs there. ✦ Contentment by WritLarge, obi-wan/owen/beru & luke, ~1k    Both Owen and Beru had harangued him once they’d determined that he was harmless, relatively speaking. When tempting him with kindness and physical comfort hadn’t worked, Beru had begun guilting Ben. ✦ Truth by ambiguously, obi-wan/beru/owen & cast, 4.2k    Kenobi brings Beru and Owen a child to raise. ✦ Midnight by lilyconrad, obi-wan/luke, 1.1k    A gentle moment between two twined in the Force, set just before A New Hope begins. ✦ φοῖνιξ by ambiguously, luke/leia, 1.8k    Everything in Luke’s life has burned to ash. REBELS RECS: ✦ Four Doors by veritascara, hera & mon & cast, 10.8k    Hera and the Ghost crew return to Yavin IV, where she must confront tough decisions about what her future will look like. ✦ Speculation by Nana, zeb/kallus & ap-5, 1k    “AP-5,” Kallus said, “are you under the impression that Captain Orrelios and I are involved, romantically?” “It is common knowledge at the base, sir. You don’t have to deny it just because I am a droid.” ✦ roisters by spookykingdomstarlight, zeb/kallus, 1.8k    For once, he is willing to put aside his thoughts and act. “Garazeb,” he says, because he is the only one who calls Zeb by his full name and because he’s noticed the way Zeb’s fur ripples in pleasure after he says it and somewhere in the back of his mind he knows that means something. “A word?” SEQUELS RECS: ✦ We Met in Blood and Dust by lucymonster, leia/amilyn, 1.5k    Life is only ever a borrowed possession. Amilyn has borrowed twice now. ✦ never gonna get too close to you (even if it hurts) by bittersnake, luke/sana & finn & hux & cast, 2k    Sometimes death brings second chances. ✦ The storms are raging on a rolling sea by ambiguously, rey/phasma, nsfw, 5.2k    Rey is searching for an old Jedi temple and finds someone she was never expecting to see again. ✦ The Warm Sunlight by tspofnutmeg, rey, 1.5k    A Jedi knight, that’s what Rey is now. Well, she has been for a while, but she was hesitant to take on the title. FULL DETAILS + RECS HERE!

[elli-oatt]

Reasons why Voltron Season 8 was the best season in my opinion *spoilers*

Episode 1:

-This was the cutest thing I've ever seen.

-We got to see Allura reveal some insecurities she has.

-Look at that animation by that tree man.

-For people who are upset about Lance's "I love you," he himself said he knew it was rushed, but it had the scene with Hunk before this to show that this was seriously the only time he could say this to her. Not only that, but I felt the "I love you," although obviously a bit romantic, was for the most part meant to be him telling her that he loves her as a person and as family like everyone else in their group. He wanted to counter her insecurities he show her that they all do care about her and that she means so much to them all.

Episode 2:

-Baby Lotor.

-Got justifications behind why Lotor's personality was the way it was.

-Got to see Honerva's back story again but this time was given more moment when she was Haggar and was unaware of her existence. We got to see how she was literally forced to watch her husband abuse her son without even knowing it. As a mother, she still feels a connection to her son, so after realizing all of this she has a great right to be pissed at the universe.

-The show had been building her up as the main villain all along without making it known to the viewer until we finally realize it. The flashbacks allow us to go back and see that there really had been one villain they had been building up throughout the whole show.

Episode 6:

-I really liked this episode and the live camera filming. It showed how much crap they have to go through in one day as a part of this mission.

Episode 7:

-Lance wanting to win Allura that blue lion stuffed animal was the cutest thing ever and I wish we would have been able to see him give it to her.

-Lance calling Allura his girlfriend, so cute.

-All the paladins random adventures in the park were amusing, while it was being contrasted heavily with the dark manipulation Allura was being put through at the same time.

-I was excited to see that they brought back the same entity thing that was the original first entity that Honerva took out of the rift. It drew a parallel between when Honerva first got possessed by the darkness of the entity and how Allura does as well, despite them both being basically the strongest Alteans in the universe.

Episodes 8 and 9:

-This philosophical stuff is my favorite.

-They made it so deep and forced the viewer to think hard, but they could still understand in the end what was happening at least on a base level. The creators didn't give the viewer an easy way to understand and didn't give a full explanation at all times because it forced the viewer to fill in whatever they thought and it also illustrated the complexities of the human mind.

-Alfor giving Lance his blessing.

-All of the paladins fighting together.

-Brought back Zarkon to reveal once again that he is also just a human (I mean not exactly, but you know what I mean) that has been corrupted by the dark urges of what it means to be human. Bringing him back helped to wrap up the series even more since he was the first supposed villain.

Episode 13:

-Each of Allura's goodbyes to the paladins had so much feeling and depth behind them that encompassed her whole interactions with each of them throughout the whole show.

-They didn't have Allura return Lance's "I love you" until this scene which made it so much more powerful.

-Lance got Altean markings to symbolically represent how Allura's spirit will always be a part of him because she had such an impact on his life. He didn't become Altean, he just got the markings.

-Allura is one of my favorite characters so I'm obviously sad she died, but her death was done so beautifully. Also, her entire character throughout the show had always been about self-sacrifice, beginning with the Balmera (which they brought back the Balmera's at the end, bringing the show beautifully full circle). Her death wasn't merely the killing off of a character, it was a personal sacrifice to save trillions of lives across the universe. Her death shouldn't be treated as an act of weak writing, but rather an illustration of how strong of a character she was.

-It was almost necessary Allura die, as her entire character was about self-sacrifice and without a single death of a main character, the show wouldn't have truly been able to illustrate the sacrifice that comes with war. They had this giant war where the stakes were high, but without a main character’s death, the stakes would have never felt as high all along.

-Allura and Honerva joining hands.

-Seeing Allura move onto death with joining her family and Honerva joining hers.

-A lot of people are upset that Lance became a farmer, but he was done with being a pilot at that point. He had experienced a multitude of stress of being a pilot of voltron and he experienced his fair share. He kept on expressing how he just wanted to be with his family again, which he got in the end.

-People also express concern with the fact that they believe Lance will never move on from Allura. It's true that I think he will love her forever, but that doesn't mean a person can't move on and find happiness with another person. The last image with him shows him with the Altean flower. It isn't that he can't or won't be able to move on, but he will always love her as a person, a friend, and romantically. He looks at the flower bittersweetly as he remembers her.

-Shiro getting a husband and kissing on screen. A lot of people are upset because he didn't have a buildup in the show with his husband, but they did not have time in the show to do this, and his husband was actually in every episode in the Atlas. A lot of people complained that they thought Allura and Lance didn't have a lot of development (even though I've seen it from the start, especially when Lance gave Blue to Allura I really saw their relationship kick off). I being LGBT myself, I love the inclusion of LGBT representation that isn't necessarily flashy and drawn out. It presents it as if it is just a normal occurrence, which is what we need, to be seen as normal.

Additional moments:

-The two intimate moments between Keith and Lance were so beautiful. For one, these moments illustrated how much each of them had matured throughout the series as they did not bicker and reminisced on how they use to act at the beginning. A lot of people are upset who shipped Klance, but I even shipped Klance a bit at the beginning of the series and I loved these scenes for what they were. We were finally able to be shown an intimate scene between two men that doesn't have to be romantic. Everyone in society always forces men to not be able to have an intimate relationship with a man without it being seen as sexual or romantic, so it's rare to see it happen. I love their close friendship that the series built up that they are allowed to share their deep feelings and intimacy without it having to be romantic.

[thekazumakuwabara]

Just out of curiosity, but what about Kuwabara and Mukuro?

[ Send me a ship and I’ll give you my (brutally) honest opinion on it: Any Kuwabara Ship Edition ]

I am trying not to laugh, because last month, half as a joke and half seriously, I wrote a thing with them. It’s technically part of an ot3, but still. (I was discussing with my friends rarepairs and polyships and my friend randomly suggested an OT3 with Mukuro and Kazuma in it. Of course, we laughed, but then I stumbled upon something while looking at Japanese twitter and then an idea bit me in the ass without me wanting to, and well, here we are. XD)

On one hand, for me to try to understand them, at first she might be a bit confused or she might actually…underestimate him. Until she did he research on him. Highly powerful, skilled human fighter. Powerful psychic abilities. The one who ended up being the one who helped breached the barrier and set into motion the current state of affairs of all the three worlds. 

And then, of course, she has to reconcile that in juxtaposition to the kind of character (like moral and such) and personality he has. He has had hints of training (hello Kurama) but he’s definitely new and unrefined at it all, in comparison to someone like herself, but… there’s something about him. It may not be a romantic attraction right away but she’d still want to keep tabs regardless. She does like knowing her opponents after all.

It would be fascinating to read, that’s for sure, hahahaha.

And because I actually still enjoy the bits I wrote for it, you can read some now, XD. It’s somewhat lengthy so I put the story under the cut.

Pretty sure you can guess what the ot3 is once you read it (or if you read tags lmao).

These bits don’t follow sequentially, just a heads up. You’ll see what I mean.

The view outside of Mukuro’s fortress is only memorable because of its location: in the Demon World. It’s as rocky and hilly as any other place Kazuma is from and there’s nothing extraordinary about it, other than the vast, sprawling forests and the purple skies.

The occasional winds that blow past Kazuma’s face do nothing to clear the thoughts inside. There’s a faint odor that wafts up into his nose but it clears out as fast as it comes. There’s something familiar in it but what that is, Kazuma can’t pin it down.

Footsteps echo behind him but stop before it can get any closer.

He doesn’t react to his companion, the woman who owns all this…splendor.

Nothing but the wind whistles between them for a while and Kazuma wonders what Mukuro has on her mind. For all that he knows of her, he can’t imagine she would have any pressing thoughts now. She’s a lot like Shizuru that way – dealing with the issues that come when it happens and making quick decisions on what to do after having a full assessment. Now, Kazuma just relies on his gut tempered with intelligence these days.

He doesn’t turn to look at her.

“Why are you afraid of it?” She asks, clear.

There’s a twist in her voice that Kazuma can’t understand but he really doesn’t want to.

Her voice returns, with an edge, perhaps, wanting Kazuma to answer. “Afraid of the darkness. You clearly are no stranger to it; too well acquainted with it.”

His mouth presses hard, containing in himself the kind of heat that boils in his belly that he refuses to release.

“Your exploits into our world are well known – and really, we have you to thank for the breach allowing us the freedom between worlds. You think I wouldn’t have done my research on you?”

Kazuma is met with her knowing smirk on her face and he’s struck with how much she reminds him of Hiei and his sister at the same time. The urge to laugh is real if his eyes weren’t as wide as plates.

Her hand barely presses into his shoulder. It is more like her hand is hovering but still connected to him, somehow, feels like the suction of a vacuum drawing something out of him. Her eyes dance with some kind of revelation, the line of her mouth soft yet intimidating. Maybe it’s the curve of her lips, not sharp, but enough of a bite to it to set Kazuma on edge.

He just watches, as her palm moves from the top of his shoulder to the base of his neck. His pulse is racing but steady, remembering some of Kurama’s long forgotten techniques he taught him for his very first tournament.

“I see why he chose you,” Mukuro simply states and it’s the penetrative power of her good eye that makes Kazuma want to fall to his knees. It’s like she’s seen through his mind but he knows that’s not true.

Her fingertips spread out and touch the bottoms of his ears, the nape of his hair. He swallows but stands his ground, not too rigid but not inattentive. Despite the power she holds in her hands (in her entire body, really) his gut doesn’t scream out at him. He is her guest but more than that… There’s more there, behind the piercing gaze. Part curiosity but–

Amusement? Pride? Maybe even…

She takes a long, deep breath and her eyes start to close. Her face relaxes, and that look, while stunningly beautiful amidst the ugly scars given to her, makes the hair on Kazuma’s body rise and he breaks himself from her grasp.

Alarm runs through his veins but he doesn’t brandish his sword, not yet.

“What–what was that?” He asks, forcing his arms to stay down.

Her hand is still in the air from where it was connected to Kazuma’s body. Her eyes open, unfocused until she blinks, opening and closing her fist. Then, her arm falls, mirroring his stance.

“You really do not know, do you?” She says. The astonishment in her voice shocks him out of his defensive mindset. Kazuma, truly, doesn’t understand.

The question is on his tongue but he doesn’t want to say it. Fears what the answer may be.

But, a man doesn’t hide from the truth and a man certainly doesn’t run away when fear wants to take control.

No, a man takes fear into its place and faces to meet the truth head on, regardless of the consequences.

Mukuro looks at her palm, as if reading, perhaps, remembering something as her fingers move. Her eyes meet his own, her mouth parted just a crack, though she may not realize it is open. She drops her arm and her gaze changes.

“Your energy,” she begins, shaking her head in correction, “No, your entire being… It’s unlike anything I’ve experienced.”

Kazuma swallows again, reminded that this woman, no, this demon has eaten humans before. Maybe not in recent years but could probably remember the taste of flesh. He feels like he could be consumed at this very moment and he would be powerless to stop it.

“You’re strong, and the beat of darkness has touched you, but it’s wrapped so tightly it cannot escape, take control. Your energy radiates this strength, but also a peace I have only known once.”

Kazuma blinks, surprise in his eyes. The look she gives him is as if she could grab a hold of him and take whatever is inside but can’t. And Kazuma doesn’t understand how he, just a human, could have something she covets so much, especially having lived for thousands of years. She has power, respect, her autonomy, a place to live freely. He cannot truly understand and why that has anything to do with Hiei.

“Do you know how rare that is?” Mukuro asks him.

No, he thinks, in the shaking of his head. What does being a good person have to do with rarity? Good people exist with power. Unless she meant being himself, being self-assured in who he is. That may be rarer but still not priceless like a fabled entity.

She steps toward him with a hand extended. Kazuma steps back, his eyes darting between her palm and her face.

She stops, and asks again, softer than he has ever heard her speak, “May I?”

He hasn’t taken his eye off her hand. “Do what?”

Mukuro’s palm lays flat, all the lines and creases staring at him, revealing she has nothing in it that will harm him. “If you let me,” she begins again, “I will show you.”

Kazuma takes one step forward. Not close, but enough that the tips of her fingers could touch his chest.

“Show me what?” He says, his question heavy with the decision that will change everything.

Both arms rise and her hands are parallel to his chest.

Her answer is simple.

She only states, “Everything.”

Kazuma raises an eyebrow, disbelief written on his face. His body feels a heavy pull as if he wants to finish the connection, but everything in his being is yelling at him to not leap head first.

“Everything?”

She repeats herself. “Everything.”

Her palms are angled, almost as if she were willing to embrace him.

“Only if you step forward,” she clarifies for him. “Step forward and I will show you.”

No matter what his beating heart says, thumping madly and hard in his ears, louder than his thoughts, no matter what his gut says, asking for caution, Kazuma knows the only way out is through, and the only way to get the truth is to seek it.

And he always takes it.

If you liked what you read, let me know! 

If you want to read my other fandom works or my non-Kuwabara YYH writing, you can go here. If you want to check out my Kuwabara-centric written works, you can look at it here. If you’re feeling extra generous, you can consider supporting me through ko-fi. (Each ko-fi is the amount of a small cup of coffee.) 

[all-is-v-57]

Sherlock - All is Vanity

This is a portion taken out of an old post I made, wanted to get rid of any other clutter in the original post and refresh it!

This is an observation of the different Shakespeare sonnet references that appear in Sherlock, along with some painting and quote analyzation. “The wheel turns, nothing is new under the sun”

“Being your slave, what should I do but tend Upon the hours and times of your desire? I have no precious time at all to spend, Nor services to do, till you require. Nor dare I chide the world-without-end hour Whilst I, my sovereign, watch the clock for you, Nor think the bitterness of absence sour When you have bid your servant once adieu; Nor dare I question with my jealous thought Where you may be, or your affairs suppose, But, like a sad slave, stay and think of nought Save, where you are how happy you make those.    So true a fool is love that in your will,    Though you do any thing, he thinks no ill.” 

Modernized verison: 

“Since I’m your slave, what else should I do but wait on the hours, and for the times when you’ll want me? I don’t have any valuable time to spend, or any services to do, until you need me. Nor do I dare complain about how agonizingly long the hours are while I watch the clock for you, my king, or how bitter your absence is after you’ve said goodbye to your servant. Nor do I dare ask jealous questions about where you might be, or speculate about your affairs, but like a sad slave I sit still and think about nothing except how happy you’re making whomever you’re with. Love makes a person such a faithful fool that no matter what you do to satisfy your desires, he doesn’t think you’ve done anything wrong.”

Sonnet 58:

“That god forbid, that made me first your slave, I should in thought control your times of pleasure, Or at your hand th’ account of hours to crave, Being your vassal bound to stay your leisure.

O let me suffer, being at your beck, Th’ imprisoned absence of your liberty; And patience tame to sufferance bide each check, Without accusing you of injury.

 Be where you list, your charter is so strong That you yourself may privilege your time To what you will; to you it doth belong Yourself to pardon of self-doing crime.

 I am to wait, though waiting so be hell, Not blame your pleasure, be it ill or well.”

“Sonnet 57 is one of 154 sonnets written by the English playwright and poet William Shakespeare. It is a member of the Fair Youth sequence, in which the poet expresses his love towards a young man. Sonnet 57 is connected with Sonnet 58 which pursues the theme of the poet as a slave of the beloved.” - Wikipedia

Modernized version: 

”Whatever god decided to make me your slave, may he never allow me to so much as think about having any control over when you see me, or asking you to account for how you’ve been passing the hours. I’m your slave, after all, and forced to wait until you have time for me. Oh, while I wait for your summons, let me suffer patiently the prison of this lengthy absence from you as you do whatever you want. And let me control my impatience and quietly endure each disappointment without accusing you of hurting me. Go wherever you want—you’re so privileged that you may decide to do whatever you like. You have the right to pardon yourself for any crime you commit. And I have to wait, even if it feels like hell, and not blame you for following your desire, whether it’s for good or bad.“

Sonnet 59:

Mary has called John 59 times in The Six Thatchers because she’s going into labor.

John says this number, ‘59.‘

If there be nothing new, but that which is Hath been before, how are our brains beguil’d, Which, labouring for invention, bear amiss The second burthen of a former child! O, that record could with a backward look, Even of five hundred courses of the sun, Show me your image in some antique book, Since mind at first in character was done! That I might see what the old world could say To this composed wonder of your frame; Whether we are mended, or whe'r better they, Or whether revolution be the same. O! sure I am, the wits of former days To subjects worse have given admiring praise.

Modernized version: “If it’s true that there’s nothing new and everything that now exists existed in the past, 

then we are really fooling ourselves when we struggle to write something new, winding up, after much exhausting, painful labor, with a tired imitation of an imitation! 

If only I could look back into the records, even as far as five hundred years ago, and find a description of you in some old book, 

written when people were just beginning to put their thoughts in writing, so I could see what the old world would say about your amazingly beautiful body. 

Then I could see whether we’ve gotten better at writing or worse, or whether things have stayed the same as the world revolves. 

Oh, I’m sure the witty writers of the past have devoted praise and admiration to worse subjects than you.“

Sherlock in The Six Thatchers, explains to Mary that he knows 58 possible ways of diminishing variables and calculating the steps she would take. (despite the fact that he did not truly use this tactic to find her location after she fled to lure Ajay away. Used a tracking device.) This mention of 58 comes after the mention of 59, which is  mentioned in The Six Thatchers episode. Mary calls 59 times when going into labor, John doesn’t notice until later.

Sonnet 59 is also connected to a picture seen in The Abominable Bride. The skull painting, of the modern Sherlock world, is blue.

In Sherlock’s mind palace, the painting is more warm in color. It also becomes a Victorian painting called All is Vanity. (The fabulous @cyntrix-gm helped me find this painting’s name)

Both the painting, and sonnet 59 refer to verses in the bible from the same book of Ecclesiastes. 

The painting also resembles this official Sherlock Holmes illustration:

(The chemical bottles/science being Sherlock’s version of vanity. Retreating into his mind, rather than the mirror. This parallels with the [presumed] perfume bottles and mirror, which in turn creates a skull of death. Sherlock’s skull is a continuously looming symbol.)

(Sonnet 59) If there be nothing new: Ecclesiastes 1.9: “The thing that hath been is that which shall be; and that which hath been done is that which shall be done; and there is no new thing under the sun.”

In Scandal in Belgravia, Sherlock says, “The wheel turns, nothing is ever new.“ and Mycroft in The Sign of Three in Sherlock’s mind palace reminds, “What do we say about coincidence?” Sherlock responds “The universe is rarely so lazy.”

All is Vanity: Ecclesiastes 1:2 “Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity.“

John’s Chinese fortune cookie, as stated on his blog  says “There is nothing new under the sun. It has all been done before.” (credited post for noticing fortune cookie, by @teaandforeshadowing)

May edit later.

[bichhebetalkin]

I wanna chat about V from mystic messenger and his love for Rika.

I want to preface this with a few things. 1) I don’t think Unconditional love exists. 2) I have not played another story because im too lazy to save up the hourglasses but also too cheap to buy them so… i may be a little lacking in info.

I don’t get too graphic, but there is discussions of an abusive relationship and religion.

1535 words 

If you press me to say why I loved him, I can say no more than it was because he was he, and I was I

–Michel de Montaigne

The primary thing I want to discuss with V is his love for Rika. This is probably his most notable feature. It’s definitely played up as a flaw, although Love and Devotion are typically seen as positive traits. 

There is a problem of love. In the way we define it and the way we use it. There are endless kinds of love; anyone would tell you that the love of a parent and the love of a spouse are two very different things. Can all types of love be recognized as love, or are they mislabeled? What distinguishes love from obsession? Is there a difference? Can there be love without devotion? These are all… huge questions. 

I honestly can’t truly define what it is to love. People (myself included) constantly talk about what “true love” really is. We all see things and think “oh yeah, that is love.” It seems like we understand it, but it’s usually way more complicated than that. At the end of the day, though, there is something that you just cannot touch. Love does not have to be justified, it can’t really be chosen, and it cannot truly be defined.

Despite this… I don’t think unconditional love exists. There is some extreme thing that a loved one could do that would take away your love. I won’t make a graphic example (I’m sure you can come up with your own), but there is some unjustifiable wrong-doing that someone would do that would be just too far. All love has at least some conditions. That is part of the frustration with V, and part of what makes him an unrelatable character (1). Rika does a number of horrible awful things. All of which directly affect V. She blinds him for one. Despite all this he rarely (if ever) turns on her in any way.

V loves her unconditionally. This is presented in the story. At first I chalked it up to something akin to Stockholm syndrome. Being in a terrible, chaotic, and abusive relationship can make you feel and do some pretty irrational things. (I know what it is like.) Even with this idea of having more fear than love, It really reads as actual Love that he feels. He loves all that Rika is and what she stands for, even if he doesn’t agree with her actions. Rika talks about how people are motivated by fear in the first secret ending. But in the same episode she says that in, V shows that he is not fearing her. 

“I think my eyes are at their end. But…. I liked it because you’re the one who gave me this pain”

That quote sums up a lot of what V feels for Rika. Certainly not healthy, but also very much not fear. V’s unconditional Love makes him do a lot of things that can make his character insufferable. He takes all of the blame for everything, which, alone does not make him bad (just sad). The part that makes him unlikable to many people is that he lies (or hides the truth) even when people are in danger. This is something that frustrated me the most. Even when the story would get to a point where I would thing “surely, he won’t lie. surely he will see the err of his ways,” but I am stuck with… what we get. 

His love for her is very similar to the way Kierkegaard(2) talks about Faith. The religious imagery is not hidden from the player at all. It’s all right there. Rika is God and V is the ever so faithful and devout follower. Faith is a bit like love in a few ways. For most people, both faith and love require devotion. You must promise…something for it to be faith/love. For Kierkegaard it goes even farther. Faith and Love must be unconditional. Not only that, but to ask anything (of God/the person you Love) it stops being faith/love. This is pretty intense for casual living, but these ideas are prevalent in how V regards Rika. There are several instances where he asks things of her(3), but the things he asks for are practically never for his benefit. Continuing with the faith/love parallel is the fact that he believes she will be better one day and that she is a kind person(4). This is a huge contradiction with her actions. This is similar to another thing Kierkegaard talks about– True faith requires an acceptance of Contradictions. In the old testament, there is The Binding of Isaac. As a short plot summary– 

Abraham is promised by god that His wife will have a son that goes on to lead nations (or some shit. I’m going by memory here. refer to footnote 2).His wife and him are uhhhh old as shit. So if he has another kid it’s likely his last. Lo, his wife is pregnant and so becomes Issac. A good little dude. Well liked an assertive, and definitely a boy that could fulfill God’s promise. However, God tells Abraham that he must kill his son. It is here that a contradiction arises. How can God promise that Abraham’s son will do great things if he also wants Isaac to be dead? Abraham accepts this anyway and takes Issac to be killed. He binds Issac to an altar and literally draws his knife and is about to kill Isaac before A messenger of God stops him. Abraham sacrifices a ram instead of Issac.

There are a few things that are important to consider. 1) In the old testament, Abraham does not consider that Isaac will be spared in any way. If he did then it would be a meaningless sacrifice. No, the thing that is impressive about the binding of Issac is not that Abraham was willing to sacrifice his son, it was that Abraham was willing to accept the contradiction in God’s promises. It was absolute faith. 2. He could not tell anyone about this because, similar to the idea of unconditional love, it cannot be explained to anyone. If he tried to tell his wife about the sacrifice of Issac, it would be as if he was speaking in tongues. 

In that, faith is just… irrational and inexplicable to anyone who isn’t Abraham. It is beautiful in its own way. A true and unwavering Devotion–similar to what we see in V. 

V accepted a lot of contradictions. Plenty of people say they want to be their lover’s “everything” but man, V meant that shit. No one in the game could relate to his love for Rika. It is similar to how Abraham could not possibly tell his wife about God’s demand for Issac’s sacrifice. V hid the truth because he knew that to anyone else it would be irrational. V always has the chance to do the right thing and turn against Rika but he is stopped by his unquestionable loyalty to her (5).

There’s a lot to unpack. I’ve discussed a lot but certainly not everything. There is the big question– Does Rika love V too? That’s a discussion for another time, but if she does love him, its clearly not the same love he has for her. And if it is decided that she doesn’t feel love, then why not? how can we decide? long topic lol. If V is the devout and the faithful, does that make faith a bad thing? Is it faith really faith if we say that you act in faith and love but with some conditions? Making V the devout makes everyone else without faith. Even Saeran, who was brainwashed, loses his faith over time. If faith can be broken, was it ever really there to begin with? Is it love without devotion? can you be devoted without love? 

idk rly. 

This essay is not perfect and is was written all in one sitting during an hour when I should have been working on finals work, forgive me for my errors. I would love it if people would like to respond to this and discuss it further, but please try to avoid spoiling Another Story for me. I would like to play it sometime

1. read: unrelatable does not mean bad here. He has plenty of relatable qualities, but his love for Rika is not one of them. I also am super glad he has this unrelatable quality since it means I can write this

2. won’t lie– I’m not super well read on Kierkegaard and not super read on the Bible. I could defo be fudging some things. Correct me if you see mistakes, but I’ll do my best. 

3. Please go to therapy, please don’t start a cult, please stop exploiting this very abused child, etc etc

4. V that is not valid at all. 

5. This a very similar theme to Whistles: The Starlight Calliope. Whistles the clown could turn against the Ringmaster but he never does because of his unwavering Devotion. 

[lostinnebuloustime]

Han Yujoo, The Impossible Fairy Tale

The Impossible Fairy Tale by Han Yujoo is that rare thing: a book that glows with a genuine weirdness. It is not “weird fiction” in any conventional sense of the term—especially not in the sense of “weird” as genre product, presenting a mainstream and palatable worldview dressed up with a few secondhand surreal flourishes. I mean this book is truly and deeply alien on the most fundamental level—weird in its very bones. The inflections of its language, the rhythms of its sentences, the words themselves, are weird. If that sounds like your cup of tea, do yourself a favor and pick this one up stat, because it is easily one of the more interesting works of contemporary fiction I have read in a long while. I applaud Graywolf Press for publishing it in English—Janet Hong deserves showers of accolades for the heroic achievement of translating it—and I hope more of Han Yujoo’s work is on the way soon, because on the basis of this book, she is the real deal—a writer whose talent nearly matches her dizzying ambitions.

The book is divided into two parts; the first part concerns two elementary school girls, one named Mia and the other referred to only as The Child. Mia, we are told, is “lucky,” while The Child is “luckless.” Mia leads a carefree existence; her mother indulges her; she receives expensive gifts from her “two fathers,” neither of whom seems to live with her (the exact nature of her family situation is left deliberately vague). The Child is initially presented as a kind of inverse of Mia: a victim of parental abuse, she haunts the school like a shadow, unnoticed by her classmates, anonymous, venting her private anguish in increasingly disturbing ways. A chain of events brings Mia and The Child together, and the story builds like an off-kilter thriller toward a harrowing climax.

This is perhaps not, in and of itself, remarkable subject matter for a novel. What makes the book memorable is the distorting lens of Han Yujoo’s prose. Though her language is simple, the effect of her style is sophisticated and disorienting; rich in wordplay and paradox, weighty with mysterious repetitions, dense with unexpected convolutions of logic, she imbues the most ordinary details with a fresh and vivid life. This style is the essence of the book, and it is almost impossible to describe, so here’s a sample passage from near the beginning:

“Mia, who more or less has everything, who was always told she could have anything she wanted, thinks she could construct her world exactly the way it is with seventy-two colors, that she could fill in the shadows of already existing objects, each with its own shade, that she could erase even the shadows, that she could perhaps kill a person. If she has the power to kill, she equally has the power to save. Therefore, nothing is impossible. Mia, who has everything, or could have everything, thinks she is able to do anything. [...] She remembers seeing on television a reenactment of how space came to be; the Big Bang, that beautiful, round thing like a wreath. She tried to draw the scene with seventy-two color pencils, but no matter how many lines she drew, there were always two colors missing and she, who had no concept of the colors she lacked, proudly showed her drawing to her fathers, and perhaps even to her mother, and one father thought Mia had drawn a flower bouquet and the other thought she had drawn the entrails of a beast.”

There’s a unique intelligence governing this passage, animating it, but trying to define this intelligence, to describe what makes it brilliant, is difficult. Is it the parallelism of the sentences? “Mia, who more or less has everything...” followed three sentences later by “Mia, who has everything, or could have everything...”? Is it the jarring progression from “she could erase even the shadows” to “she could perhaps kill a person”? Is it the way the set of seventy-two colored pencils functions as a metaphor for the narrowness of Mia’s childhood perspective, as well as for the inability of language to define reality? The mystery of the “two colors” missing from Mia’s drawing of the Big Bang?

Anyway. Then Part II comes along, and whatever you thought you knew about Part I is abruptly called into question. If the book contains flaws and overindulgences, these are mostly concentrated in the second part, which lacks some of the narrative urgency of the first; there’s a looser character to the writing, which, given that the prose is rather experimental to begin with, allows for some precarious swerving toward self-parody. There are a number of fairly inscrutable passages like the following:

“There is frost on the glass. I must go back. But my hands have frozen onto the steering wheel. Every time I move, ice scales burrow delicately, sharply, into my body. I can’t tell whether the scene I see is the foreground or the background. Probably neither. I must go back. But the scene grows distant. I can no loner recall the names that point to objects smaller than fingernails. A part of a fingernail, a part of a part of a fingernail, a part of a part of a part of a fingernail. From that place in the distance and beyond, countless snowflakes are in bloom. The snowflakes take over. White petals are in full bloom. The scene begins to crack. The cracks spread, and the scene spills over onto the scene. The scene overflows. I am nowhere to be found. Ice scales burrow into my entire body. I glance down at myself. I vaporize. Without vapor. Without vapor.”

Some readers will inevitably be put off by this kind of thing; my patience was tested in a few places, and I have a reasonably high tolerance for the avant-garde. Let’s just say that if you’re fond of dismissing art as “pretentious,” this may not be the book for you. Certainly there are times when the author seems to be using an awful lot of words to say very little that makes much sense. But just when you think she’s vanished inside a solipsistic maze, she spirals back around to her story, and you realize that, although its form is highly unusual (perhaps even “impossible”), there is indeed a story here, one that Han Yujoo is deeply committed to telling in her own way, which is, in the end, the only way it could be told, because this is not a story about “what happens,” but about the telling of stories. Far from a postmodern trickster playing games with her readers, she is a writer who worries obsessively over her questions. Sometimes this worrying becomes a bit of a nervous tic, a compulsive rather than a meaningful gesture, but even when the results are overwrought, her engagement with the questions at the heart of her book is never less than sincere.

Not much is clear by the end of The Impossible Fairy Tale, including how much, if any, of the story has actually happened—indeed, the validity of a phrase like “actually happened” is left in doubt. But there is little doubt about the book’s unsettling power, or its author’s remarkable mind.

[hannahdolphinportfolio]

What artist/designer influences you? Essay

As an artist and designer I am often inspired to create from sources outside of traditional art such as film, news and popular culture. Most significant is the influence I feel music has on my practice. Even the smallest section of music can inspire an entire project for me and I feel listening to and exploring music is a key part of my creative process. Due to this I aim to explore a wide range of music styles to find new and interesting sounds and lyrics that could spark thoughts and ideas. A key music artist I have found is Claire Boucher, known better by her stage name Grime. Boucher is a 28 year old Canadian singer, songwriter, music producer, music video director and artist as well as modelling for fashion brands/ magazines such as Vogue, DAZED and InStyle. I feel she influences me not just through the interesting an unique sounds she creates with her music but also with her own creative process and her views of what it means to her to be a women and artist.   Grimes is a character or persona with her own narrative created by Boucher as if creating a brand. In an interview for HUNGER she explains “I guess I engineered a pop star but I used myself… I created a brand which is Grimes. It was totally DIY.” Not feeling she could express herself fully as Claire she built this new character that could perform in front of an audience something she felt uncomfortable doing as herself. In many ways I feel this parallels with artists and designers. We create our work building our own artistic personas through our practice without having to let the world know us as an individual if we wish. We are able to use our work to speak for us in a way we couldn’t as just ourselves. In an interview with The Guardian she states “In my life, I’m a lot weirder than this,” she explains. “Grimes is more palatable for humans” She continues “I try to make it digestible to a degree… That’s what I’m interested in seeing. I create a thing that I wish existed in the world, versus my own full unabashed creative expression.” Again an idea that I feel would resonate with many artists. We create things we wish to see or communicate to the world and to do so must craft our work carefully to realise our intentions. This narrative of Grimes has developed over the years and grown into to further personas named the Art Angels which she explores in her latest album of the same name. In a documentary for FADER Boucher states "At first, I guess, there was just Grimes … I don't technically have control of her narrative anymore—she very much exists in pop culture now. Grimes as one person cannot represent more than a couple of ideas. That's why I started developing some of the other characters, like really abstract from who I am and how I am." This way of creating is interesting to me, exploring different areas you perhaps couldn’t as yourself allowing for her work to become more abstracted from her original personal style developing it over the years. This way of creating is one we don’t see within the music industry and is one of the many reasons I feel she has been such a success within pop culture. Boucher has made a conscious effort to create every aspect of the Grimes world herself from the music itself to directing and producing her music videos, illustrating her album art work etc. Despite her prolific list of titles that have grown out of her career as Grimes she never intended to be a musician growing up and instead found her love for creating music later on in life at the age of 22 stating in an interview at Coachella “It’s really weird that this is my job” . She then began rising in popularity over the course of a year for her unique style in music, art and fashion. Her music has a creative and experimental electro pop style that takes inspiration from an array of music styles such as R&B, Hip Hop, Electronica, Pop etc. I feel having such as wide range of sources to inspire her has been the key to her success allowing her to take inspiration from so many different areas and applying that to her own ideas to create new and interesting sounds that break the boundaries of pop. When creating her work Boucher states in her FADER documentary ”process is just as important as the final product” in which she discusses how other music producers will offer to create songs for her in which she always declines saying “It’s like me saying to you guys hey can I film this interview for you… you know just people offering to do your job all the time” She then goes on to explain how this is infuriating stating “I don’t just wanna be the face of this thing that’s been built, I wanna be the person who built it” This view is refreshing I feel showing her true passion for what she does as an artist not just as a performer in an industry which tends to push for fame over creativity in my opinion.  Her passion and work ethic is a huge inspiration to me as a designer and is an example to me of what a true artist should be.   She describes how she creates her work in an interview for ABC News explaining “ I care about texture, I care about trying different production techniques, I care about referencing songs that are not usually referenced in pop music” This process can be applied in art and design as well. I feel experimenting with different techniques and exploring new process is a key to the creative process further showing how Grimes is not just a performer but an artist. To create each song she creates and explores a concept through her music for example ‘Oblivion’ was created “using the ideas of masculine physical power and building something beautiful with that and sort of me(Grimes) being some sort of voyeuristic figure within this sort of world” again paralleling the process of an artist/designer and showing how her songs aren’t just a collection of well put together sounds or a catchy beat in order to gain fame and money but is an exploration of ideas that culminate in a piece that communicate these concepts and ideas to an audience. When creating her 2013 album ‘Visions’ Boucher was given a strict deadline to work to which resulted in her creating the majority of the album in isolation for three consecutive weeks. During this time she had a period of nine days without food, sleep or company with Boucher also blacking out her windows as she felt it more difficult to create music in day light. She describe the experience as "equally enjoyable and tortuous" and explained ” After nine days you have no stimulation, so your subconscious starts filling in the blanks ... I started to feel like I was channelling spirits. I was convinced my music was a gift from God. It was like I knew exactly what to do next, as if my songs were already written.” This extreme way of creating led to an album that won the Electronic Album of the Year award from Juno awards and shows how her dedication and passion for what she does has resulted in her success within the industry. Her latest album Art Angels has been described as “one of the most innovative and interesting records of the decade so far” by  The Guradian and has allowed her to achieve the 2016 Bazaar Women of the Year Award for Musician Of The Year 2016. Creating essentially every part of her latest album Art Angels was a decisions made in response to the “treatment she receives in the male-dominated world of recording studios”. Her role as a women working within her industry is another reason I find her so inspiring. In an interview with The Guardian she explains “It’s of interest that we never hear anything where no men were involved but we hear things where no women were involved. [My album] was mixed and mastered by a man. There’s one mastering engineer who is a female, Emily Lazar. I don’t know any female mixers,” she says. “The whole record was produced, engineered, written, performed by a woman, which is pretty rare. I don’t know if I ever heard a record like that, fully, with vocals on and stuff.” Grimes is paving the way for women in music and showing that it isn’t just the men that can produce and use such elaborate technology. In her interview with HUNGER she discusses her experiences stating “It was difficult to buy a microphone ‘cause the guy at the store was laughing at me and wouldn’t take me seriously … people just seem to assume that I’m really an airhead” her determination to continue to create despite the industry she is part of suggesting it isn’t her place is truly inspiring and is one of the many reasons she is such a key artist within the music industry. There are many reasons I take inspiration from Grimes and I intend to continue to do so throughout my time as an artist/designer as well as continuing to explore music as a source of inspiration for my work as I feel taking inspiration from varying sources is an integral part of being successful within the art industry.

[realreader-blog1]

First and foremost, I must try my best to convey to you the truly hypnotic sense of this novel. It’s unbelievably difficult to explain, but this book is so astoundingly complex and atmospheric that I can’t help but think about it all the time, even after I’ve finished it. It’s slightly bittersweet, though, because nothing else I read even comes close to The Secret History. More often than not I struggle to put into words why this book is so unique to me. So here is what some others have come up with which I feel do a decent job of describing such a fascinating book: “A huge, mesmerizing, galloping read, pleasurably devoured... Gorgeously written, relentlessly erudite.” -The Times (London) “I adore the slow, building tension and the sense that I, as a reader, was being skillfully manipulated.” -Maggie Stiefvater “...the novel certainly hit me hard, hard enough that I found myself on Google at 4:30AM searching for articles, comments and others enchanted by this wonderful work of art.” - Micheal Cater Essentially, this book is about Richard Papen, a young man from a small suburb in California who, with much financial aid, is able to attend Hampden College in Vermont. Richard finds his entire life to be rather pathetic, and upon moving across the country, begins to build a new identity for himself. Particularly through his acceptance into a very exclusive, cult-like Greek class with 5 extremely pretentious students and one enigmatic professor called Julian, Richard creates an entirely new life for himself. Even more interestingly, in the very first page of the prologue, two things are revealed: One of the members of the group has been murdered, and the rest of the group is responsible for his death. Donna Tartt tells you exactly who kills who in the first page. The story becomes not a whodunnit, but a whydunnit. Interestingly enough, it makes the novel incredibly more suspenseful. Richard begins telling the story starting from when he met the rest of the group, taking us through all the events which lead up to the murder, and then the second half, Book II, follows the aftermath of the killing. To my surprise, this approach was so much more powerful than any other mystery I’ve come across. As we follow Richard through his first months at Hampden, he becomes absolutely infatuated with everything around him, simply because it is so different from his lackluster upbringing. From the Greek lectures to his new group of peers to the college campus itself, Richard’s narration almost seems as if he observes everything through a rose-tinted lens. He even admits that his recollections are blurred in this way: “It is only here that the stilted mannequins of my initial acquaintance begin to yawn and stretch and come to life. It was months before the gloss and mystery of newness... would finally wear off.” Each description is borderline dreamlike, and yet there is an ever-present foreboding feeling constantly looming in the back of the mind, because Richard and the readers know that one of them ends up dead. Donna Tartt’s decision to name the murderer and murdered on the first page, I think, gives the same powerful anticipation like that of The Iliad and The Odyssey, which tell exactly what is going to happen before it even does. This, along with potentially many other allusions which I am not well-read enough to catch, parallels the characters’ obsession with Greek and the Classics, making The Secret History somewhat of a Greek tragedy in itself. The ending in particular is especially dramatic, and shows how this group was so obsessed with tragedy, that they turned their lives into one. The opening sentences of Chapter 1, on a basic level, sum up much of the book very well: “Does such a thing as ‘the fatal flaw,’ that showy dark crack running down the middle of a life, exist outside literature? I used to think it didn’t. Now I think it does. And I think that mine is this: a morbid longing for the picturesque at all costs.” This exact idea is seen in countless ways throughout the book. It is in the groups’ fascination with dramatic tragedy, in Julian’s decision to have an extremely small and selective class, even in Richard’s descriptions of Camilla’s ‘glowing’ beauty. The students’ obsession with aesthetic and beauty at all costs is seen even in their iconic physical appearances: the twins who often wear white, Henry with dark English suits and permanently carrying an umbrella like an accessory, Francis with French cuffs and fancy neckties. Their obsession naturally carries into their rather sophisticated behaviors as well, and it seems as though these characters are practically living in the wrong century. All of them, save Richard, have more money than they know what to do with, and are extremely privileged, living in their own little bubbles filled with ancient philosophy. Henry, at one point, is incredulous to hear that a man had actually walked on the moon, proving these characters’ extensive and voluntary isolation to reality. It is understandable why some may find the characters intolerably pretentious, however to me, that is all the more reason to admire the book. The characters are not superficially likable in the slightest, and are rarely, if ever, relatable. But they are also pretty despicable human beings, and you aren’t supposed to like these people. They’re murderers for crying out loud. But above all, they’re realistic. Through their actions, they prove the lengths people are willing to go in order to save themselves. This book contains an unprecedented level of complexity, paired with masterful writing to create a true work of art. My words can never do justice to what experiencing the novel is truly like, and I could never have enough time to go in depth on every detail which inspired thought. This is one of those books you can’t stop thinking about once you’ve finished. For the first time in my remembered life, I can confidently say I have one favorite book.