#♡ ‣ ❝ dash games. › Sometimes I just want to know what it’s like to be you

[moonstruckme]

I love your roomate!james. I was wondering if you could do one where shy!reader is sick and she doesn’t tell james bc she’s used to taking care of herself but he’s adamant about taking care of her. 🥺🖤

Thank you lovely!

cw: implied nausea and vomiting

part 1 │ part 2 │ part 3 │ part 4 │part 5 │ part 6 │ part 7 │ part 8 │ part 9 │ part 10 │ part 11 │ part 12 │ part 13

roommate!James x shy!reader ♡ 1.6k words

James worries he’s scared you off. 

He thought you’d been having a good time the other night, hanging out with his friends and then teasing each other while he battled you for cleanup duties after. He’d certainly had a good time. Watching you smile more readily as you got comfortable, feeling your soft form tucked up against his on the couch, it had made his whole body feel light and fizzy, but now James wonders if the easy, familiar energy of the night had made him too bold. There had been a moment, just before you’d gone to bed, where you’d seemed to stumble, defaulting back to the awkward, self-conscious way of speaking you’d had before you got to know each other. 

James might not have thought anything of it—you still get shy sometimes, he can never figure out what causes it—except you’ve been very obviously avoiding him ever since. That next day, you went to work and then disappeared into your room straight after you got home. He told himself he was being paranoid. But yesterday, you seemingly had the day off, and every time you needed to emerge from your room James heard you dash down the stairs and back up as if your bedroom was the only safe zone in the apartment. 

He hears you doing it again now, the soft click of your door unlatching before quiet footsteps start down the stairs. If Sirius were here, they’d probably make a game out of timing you, but James estimates it’s less than a minute before you start back up again. He wishes he could tell you not to hurry yourself; he has no intent of cornering you in your own home, even if he does want to patch things up. 

Then something falls on the stairs with a loud thud, followed by a sharp gasp just outside James’ room, and all thoughts of giving you your space are quickly abandoned. It was a valiant effort. 

“Shit,” he says as soon as he opens the door. He crouches beside you, taking your elbow in his hand, cushioning it from the cruel edge of the step, “Did you hurt yourself?” 

You must have had a mean fall. You’re completely crumpled on the stairs, one of your legs curled under you and one outstretched behind you as though it’s slipped back. Both of your elbows are braced underneath your body, keeping your face from smacking into the corner of the stair. James is willing to bet that big sound he’d heard was your knee hitting the step below you as you tripped. 

“Fuck,” you whine, pulling an entire loaf of bread from beneath your other elbow. The middle has been completely crushed, smashed between your forearm and the edge of a step. You look genuinely distraught about it. 

“Did you hurt your knee?” James frets, fighting the urge to haul you up off the stairs so he can look you over properly. He does take your other elbow in hand, using a firm grip to encourage rather than haul. You get more or less upright. 

“I’m okay.” You sound a bit odd, though he supposes you could be winded by the fall. “Thanks, sorry.” 

“What are you sorry for?” James can’t help it if a bit of teasing makes its way into his voice. This is something the two of you always do, you overapologizing and him making fun of you for it. “It seems like if anyone ought to be apologizing, it should be the stairs.” 

Your mouth tips up slightly. “Solid point,” you concede. 

The load in James’ chest lightens at your willingness to fall back into a casual repartee. He rubs the point of your elbow distractedly. “Wanna tell me why you’re taking an entire loaf of bread to your room?” he asks, grinning. “Do you have a secret stash of sandwich-making supplies in there?”

He feels goosebumps erupt on the side of your arm, and he does his best to soothe those, too. It must be too cold in here for you. “No,” you say quietly.

“Mm. I thought we were past this, angel. Come downstairs, I’ve still got leftover pasta in the fridge.”  

He starts to lead you down, but before he’s made it two steps you say, “No, thank you.” 

“Oh, come off it.” James shoots you another easy grin, hoping to loosen you up. “Don’t be a martyr. I’m all for carbs, but bread by itself will hardly sustain you.” 

“I don’t have much choice.” You shrug, and your shoulders stay up higher than they had been. You seem embarrassed. He waits, intrigued. “It’s sort of the only thing I can keep down at the moment.” 

It takes a blink for James to understand. “Are you not feeling well?” 

“Not very.” Your voice is softer than soft, swallowed up by the nerves James thought he’d earned an exemption from but nonetheless can’t hold against you in this state. 

He can see it, now. The way you’re holding yourself, like you could curl up on the floor at any given moment. Your complexion is flushed and your eyes slightly unfocused, glazed. 

He presses the back of his hand to your forehead. 

“Oh, sweetheart.” It comes out more caring than he’d ever meant for it to, but James is too worried about you to dwell much upon that. You bat his hand away weakly, but he just moves them both to your cheeks, feeling himself frown. “You’re burning up, love. Why didn’t you say?” 

“Not much to say.” You move away from his touch, backing towards your room. James pursues you, hand hovering near your elbow because you really do look like you could pass out. "It's a stomach bug. It'll pass."

“I could have been helping you if I knew. I just thought you were avoiding me,” he admits. You look so sorry he’s quick to smooth things over with a smile. “Do you need me to get you anything from the store?”

“I already went.” You slump onto your bed before seeming to realize he’s still behind you, your brows coming down. “I’ve got everything I need, but thanks.” 

“You went to the store like this?” James is aghast. “You should be resting! How high is your fever?” 

“Dunno.” You seem to give up uncharacteristically quickly on getting him to leave, sighing and sinking back against a propped-up pillow. “I don’t have a thermometer.” 

“You don’t?” He’s more frazzled by the second, every way in which you’re not being properly taken care of piling onto the last. It seems a miracle you’re still alive. 

You look suspicious. “Do you?” 

Shit. He grins sheepishly. “No...” 

But that doesn’t change the fact that you should, for some reason. People like James are allowed to coast through the world unprepared because responsible ones like you always have the things they need. 

He feels your face again. This time, you let him. Your breath fans warm over his wrist, those fever-glazed eyes drooping slightly. 

“Your hand is cold,” you say through a sigh. 

“I think you’re just hot,” James mutters, but that doesn’t stop him from stroking his thumb over your cheek, just once. Your lashes flutter closed, and his heart does an impressive flip in his chest. 

“Have you had paracetamol?” he asks you. 

You hum. James sweeps his thumb over your cheek again, hoping to rouse you, but it only seems to worsen your drowsiness. Your head actually lolls into his touch. 

“Is that a yes?” 

“Mhm, yeah,” you say without opening your eyes. “You need to stop doing that, m’gonna fall asleep.” 

“You should be sleeping,” he says softly. It’s impossible to keep the fondness from his voice. “I’m gonna get you a cold flannel, okay?” 

Your eyelids crack open. “I don’t need you to take care of me,” you say, voice nearly slurring with sleepiness. “I’ve always done fine, by myself.” 

“You never neglect to remind me.” James slips his hand from beneath your face, going to the bathroom between your bedrooms. “I don’t mind helping, though. You don’t always have to do everything on your own, what are roommates for?” 

You make a quiet, breathy sound he suspects might be a laugh. “None of my other roommates were ever as nice to me as you are. I think you’re taking things beyond the requirements of the job.” 

James thinks so, too. But still. Regardless of the complicated feelings he’s starting to have for you, you’ve always deserved to be treated with care. 

“You mean to tell me,” he says, wringing out the flannel and going back to your room, “that if you were this poorly, none of your previous roommates would have offered to help?” 

Your eyes are open more fully now. You watch him as he lays the flannel on your forehead, smoothing away a couple of baby hairs before they can get trapped underneath, with an odd expression on your face. 

“I handle my own problems,” you say softly. 

James’ thumb is still stroking the baby hairs at your temple. He can’t get it to stop. 

“Maybe your problems could be my problems, too,” he says. The lightness of his tone is automatic, but it serves as no representation of the great and weighty feeling in his chest. He realizes his breathing has synced to yours. Quiet inhales and exhales in your quiet apartment. 

Your eyes slip closed again. “Why?” you murmur. 

James doesn’t have an answer for that. Not one he’s ready to think about. The lines of your face smooth out as you relax. More evidence of frowns than smiles, but he likes to think he’s made progress on the little creases fanning out from the corners of your eyes since he’s moved in. He feels a pang of triumph any time they make an appearance, little rays of sunshine on a wholly lovely face. 

Because he’s your roommate. Because whether you’re ready to admit it or not, he’s your friend. Because he cares about you. 

In the end, James doesn’t have to come up with an answer. You’re already asleep. 

[struwberrii]

I've seen your hq! date night ideas and wonder if I can ask for this; what about their indoor date ideas for maybe when they're too tired from games/works or maybe when they have to raincheck bc of storms, etc.? Any characters of your choices but I'd love kuroo, oikawa, and maybe hinata, please?

Thank you!

haikyuu boys indoor date night headcanons ⋆𐙚₊˚⊹♡

thank you for the request anon!!

i love this as a person who prefers to stay in too (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

characters: hinata, kageyama, bokuto, akaashi, kenma, kuroo, iwaizumi, oikawa

˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚

hinata

movie night date!!

would probably want to just hang out on the couch and eat snacks

probably would want to match an old dad humor comedy, like an adam sandler movie

would also door dash you guys fast food

you guys commentary on the movie make it 10% funnier

probably is so tired he falls asleep half way through the movie

i feel like he knows all the best deserts and you guys would be feasting

LOTS of cuddling the entire time

kageyama

board games!!

i feel like he would NOT play about spoons

also i feel like he’d we oddly good at monopoly

you guys make food, put music on and just play games together

he probably lets you win sometimes bc he thinks it’s cute when you get excited

kisses you on the head as a reward for winning (if you do win)

he gets really into the games though, but your happiness is his priority

bokuto

karaoke date!!

i feel like he’d prefer going out for a date but if you were tired he’d stay in with you

he is SO LOUD

he hits those notes though

he locks in extra hard when a bruno mars song comes on the tv

you guys eat chips and drink soda all night

constantly motivating you to do a duet with him

would probably sing so hard he’d get tired and fall asleep in your living room (·•᷄∩•᷅ )

akaashi

cooking lessons online!!

probably brings you flowers before

would probably look up a video and try to replicate the recipe with you

you guys make dinner and dessert :3

super cute, like he feeds you while you’re cooking and it’s so romantic the whole time

you guys listen to like jazz music

the food actually ends up really good

kenma

video game date!! (boring ik im sorry)

he teaches you how to play his fav games

he’s vv patient too, he tries his best to teach you though even if you kinda suck lol

probably orders you guys fast food too

let’s you win when you guys play fighting games occasionally and if he does beat you he makes sure it’s a very close game

let’s you feed him (so cute)

you guys end up falling asleep to a movie together at the end of the night

kuroo

lego building date!!

or like any model of something lol

would probably get something super nerdy like a star wars ship

makes you guys drinks while you build them

i feel like he wears glasses for some reason like does he? idk am i crazy? i feel like hed be wearing glasses during this

brags if he finishes his section before you even though he gave you a way harder part to build than his lol

helps you after though

every little thing is distracting you guys but you end up finishing by the end of the night and keeping it in your bedroom

iwaizumi

yoga date!!

he would probably talk you into doing it and put a video on the tv for you guys

i feel like even indoors he would still try to stay active and fit

helps you stretch or spots you

the date probably turns into him giving you a massage (if u guys r anything like that youll NEED that massage after a 15 min yoga video)

makes you guys smoothies to drink as a treat for "finishing" even though you never finished the full video

oikawa

reading together!!

i feel like with all the stuff oikawa has going on, a chill quiet night is just what he needs at the end of the day to clear his mind

finds a book you both like and buys 2 copies so you guys can read at the same time

you guys sit cuddled on the couch reading your books under the dim lamp lighting

probably lights candles too

has audible reactions to anything crazy that happens in the book, like he'll gasp or go like "no way" out loud and then ask if you got to that part yet

you guys have a set chapter you stop at

serious discussion about the book afterwards (except its not actually that serious (ᵕ—ᴗ—)

you end up falling asleep in his arms on the couch hehehe

[topzsun]

WHAT A LONG WINTER, WHAT A BAD JOKE

── ♡ RENO ICHIKAWA

you couldn't be the hero reno wanted you to be.

Every time you remember Reno Ichikawa, it’s with flakes of snow clinging to his lashes and bundles of clothing that looked too big on his figure. You had met him in the winter, and it’s that version of him immortalised in your mind. Sometimes, you wonder if he thinks of you this fondly, before realising the answer would be less than favourable.

It starts with his grandmother’s hand on your back, urging you closer in the direction of her grandson. The youngest Ichikawa, unable to meet your eyes, keeps his gaze strictly on the carpeted floor even when his grandmother calls his name gently. You felt pity for the old lady, who had all but pleaded that you’d come to play with her grandson after having just moved into the house next door. While you were reluctant, preferring to choose your own company, your bleeding heart of a mother did not give you any choice on the matter, especially not with a glassy-eyed elder in front of her. You understand her desperation now, Reno was incredibly seclusive.

Seemingly having given up for now, Reno’s grandmother lets you know that she has fresh fruit for you in the kitchen, before exiting for her household chores. Now left alone with no supervision, the silence has become even more unbearable. You realise if you weren’t going to push him, you’d have to come home to your disappointed mother, and so you steel yourself for the uphill battle that is befriending this odd boy.

“Do you wanna play outside? I saw a cool hill earlier, have you seen it before?” When Reno nods his head slowly, you puff out your chest pridefully. “Well, everyone says I’m the best at making up games. The hill is gonna be a lot more fun now that I’m here!”

While he doesn’t protest, you can tell from his furrowed brows and permanent frown that he doesn’t believe you. This doesn’t bring down your confidence, instead sparking your competitive streak as you dash to the front door to tug on your fur-trimmed boots.

“You’ll see, then! I’m gonna race you there.”

Finally, some form of life comes back to the young boy, as he fumbles behind you to put on his shoes lest he falls behind on your head start. Despite your initial advantage, he manages to beat you to the beginning of the snow-painted hill, and you usually this would be your cue to throw a tantrum. However, when you see him finally smile gleefully at his first win, you decide to keep your mouth shut. You were too young to understand the flutter in your stomach.

Maybe it’s life’s cruel joke, to have you grow up under the adoration and dependency of Reno Ichikawa, only to snatch it away at the last second. You’re seated on your bed, white-knuckling your quilt till you are sure you could almost rip it apart. Reno, who stands in front of you, refuses to lower his resolute stare but you can tell he’s growing hesitant, his violet eyes flickering from your shaken expression to your trembling hands. Who could blame you? His news to you could shake the heart of anybody.

He wants to join the Anti-Kaiju Defence Force. He’ll die.

He wants you to join him.

“I can’t,” You manage to croak out, and his face falls.

“It’s okay,” He says softly, a tone he reserves just for you. He looks like he wants to reach over and grasp your hand in his, but restrains himself. “I’ll go.”

“No,” You insist, voice rising and you have little care for your parents who are still sleeping comfortably across the hall, unaware of the living nightmare happening to you. “I can’t do this. Where is this coming from? Why do you want to put yourself in danger for people you don’t even know?”

Why do you want to leave?

He isn’t able to answer you right away, but the stare he gives you is long and heavy. Reno’s affection has always been loud to you, but right now his disappointment is louder. You’re thankful that darkness mostly shrouds your bedroom, you don’t think you can handle visibly seeing Reno’s opinion of you chip away.

“I want to be a hero,” He finally answers, and you know he does. He always wished and prayed on it every Tanabata. Whenever you guys had played games, he had always picked to be the hero. Yet, it was only you who seemed to hope that an unrealistic ambition like that would eventually fizzle away.

“Can’t you do that some other way?” You are unable to bite back your frustration, and he freezes under your harsh tone. However, where you were stubborn, he was worse. He refuses to shrink under your firm gaze, his eyebrows puckering and a deep-set scowl on his lips.

“Why can’t you be supportive?” He snaps back, and you launch to your feet, the whiplash from the sudden movement making your head spin.

“Fine then, I’ll be supportive! Go die at the battlefield, where everybody will forget about who you are, and what you’ve done!” Your heart pounds rapidly against your ribcage, blood swimming in your head. “Go die, and leave granny and I to bury your remains, if the Kaiju feel nice enough to leave any bits of you behind!”

You know you’ve gone too far when you see his face contort, stung by your callous words, and you know it is too late to take them back. You didn’t even think about his family and the cruel losses he suffered under a Kaiju. An apology had already begun to leave your lips, but Reno didn’t wait long enough to hear it. His back is already turned, halfway out of the window he had first used to climb in, and you can only watch desolately as he disappears into the shadow of the night without a second glance back at you. You all but throw yourself at your pillow, sobbing silently into the sheets.

That night, long-forgotten memories of a young Reno haunt your mind.

(“I wish I had a hero,” He mumbles into the sleeves of his jacket, legs tucked to his chest as he twirls a stray leaf. You stop your ruthless onslaught on the piles of dead autumn leaves just to turn in his direction, head tilted as a sign for him to continue.

“It’d be nice,” He continues. “To have somebody always in your corner… knowing no matter what they’ll save you.”

You are not ignorant to the date, having only earlier visited his family grave with him and granny. The concept of death is much too grandiose and far away to your naive mind, but when you see the tears dotting the corner of Reno’s eyes you begin to have an understanding. He is wishing for something that could have spared him the heartache.

You stroll over to the bench he rests on, heaving your small body so you can sit beside him. Absentmindedly, you reach over to brush aside some stray leaves that had fallen in his hair. You miss the red that decorates the corner of his ears at the action.

“Then, I’ll be your hero!” You declare boldly, slapping a palm over your heart as you grin widely at his bewildered expression. “No matter what, I’ll save you!”

You feel relieved when a familiar smile quirks on the corner of his lips, and he’s back to being your beloved, kind-hearted Reno.)

Oh. You broke your promise.

[aisclosed]

Match Found ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ - 8. night night

Synopsis: Jungwon is sick of his friends' constant teasing over his lack of gaming skills. Determined to secretly improve and prove enha wrong, Jungwon sets out to learn to play, except he has no clue where to begin. Luckily for him, y/n is a girl with too much time on her hands, a desperate need for distraction and is more than happy to indulge him. Only, things are never that simple and Jungwon soon finds it difficult to explain exactly what the pair have become.

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smau + (3.3k) written work (srry lol i have no excuse )

warnings: mentions of death and parental neglect. mentions of injury and blood. cursing.

“Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. I gotta go,” Jungwon curses to himself as he hops around the room, pulling on his sneakers and grabbing his hoodie off of his chair. Running his fingers through his hair, Jungwon spins aimlessly in the middle of his room, eyes darting around frantically for a glimpse of his keys and wallet. 

Fucking hell. I don't have time for this. I'll just text someone to let me in tomorrow. Jungwon abandons the seemingly impossible task and bursts out of his room, startling Heeseung who looks up at him through a mouthful of ramen. 

“Hyung, I need your car. I'll bring it back sometime tomorrow. Where are your keys? Jungwon asks, feet tapping impatiently against the floor. 

Heeseung only stares back in wide eyed confusion, swallowing harshly. "Woah Jungwon, you good? Where are you even heading out this late?"

Jungwon groans in exasperation, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Look hyung, I need to get to Y/N's right now. It's important and I'm worried. Can we please save the story time for later? Either give me your keys or I'm just gonna run there."

Heeseung' stare softens at Jungwon's anxious demeanor and he pushes away from the table, standing up. "I'll drive you, it's not safe for you to be on the road when you're this worked up. Come on, let's go" 

Jungwon doesn't wait for Heeseung to finish his sentence, walking briskly out the door without a second glance. Heeseung gives his half eaten bowl of ramen one last doleful look "I'll be back for you baby girl,” sighing as he follows Jungwon out. 

The car ride is tense to say the least. Any attempts of making jokes or small talk are quickly shut down by a sharp glare from the passenger seat.  Jungwon knows he's being irrational, that Heeseung is doing him a favor and he should be grateful and much nicer. But the hammering of his heart against his ribs won’t allow him to act rationally and he knows that Heeseung understands, he always does. So Jungwon vows to thank him and apologize properly later but for now, he allows his mind to be consumed by thoughts of you. 

As the car finally turns down the familiar street of your place, Jungwon's fingers drum insistently against his bouncing thigh. His energy begging to be expended as he resists the urge to just jump out of the car and run up all 42 flights to your side. A gentle pat on his shoulder brings him back to reality, and Jungwon turns to meet his friend's warm gaze.

"Don't worry Jungwon. Y/N seems like a strong girl. I'm sure she’s fine. And even if she's not, she will be eventually." Heeseung says softly.

Jungwon nods stiffly, willing himself to believe Heeseung's words.You were fine. You had to be.  "You can pull over here hyung, it's that building. Thanks for taking me" he mutters quietly, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"Alright Jungwon, do you want me to wait for you out here? Or go up with you?" Heeseung asks as the car rolls to a stop.

"No. Go home hyung. I'll see you tomorrow." Jungwon says firmly and takes off in a brisk jog.

Knowing he was almost at his destination did nothing to calm the jitters that ran down his spine. If anything, it just spurred him to run even faster, ignoring the curious looks he got as he moved through the familiar lobby, dashing into the waiting elevator.

Come on, come on, come on. Y/N why the fuck do you have to live all the way at the top. The numbers on the elevator ascend at a tortuous pace and Jungwon feels as if he might just lose his mind. The chime of the doors opening finally puts him out of his misery and Jungwon sends up a silent prayer that Chenle was right about your code as he punches it into the keypad. 

A green flash assures Jungwon that his luck hadn’t run out completely and he walks in, blinking as his eyes adjust to the darkness. Your house is eerily silent, only illuminated by the lights of the metropolis outside your windows. 

"Y/N?" Jungwon calls out anxiously, moving towards your room, receiving no answer in return. Jungwon’s ears prick at the faint sobs coming from the opposite direction and he goes to your living room to find you sitting on the floor staring out the large windows. He approaches you cautiously, there's a crunch under the boot of his shoe and Jungwon looks down in confusion to find the marble covered in shards of glass and swirls of red fluid. For a moment, Jungwon’s heart drops to his stomach but he breathes a sigh of relief as the astringent smell hits his nose and he realizes the culprit is wine. 

Your head turns away from the cityscape at the sound of crushed glass, brows knitting in confusion when you find Jungwon staring back at you.

"Jungwon? What are you doing here?" You ask breathily, eyes dilating as you take in his appearance.

He rakes his eyes over your figure, scanning for any trace of injury and for a second Jungwon is at a loss for words. Your eyes are rimmed red, cheeks still streaked with the remnants of tears and yet Jungwon can’t help the way his breath hitches at the sight of you under the moonlight. It’s almost hauntingly beautiful and he’s not sure he’ll ever be able to forget how you look up at him that night. 

"Chenle told me what happened. ,” Jungwon starts carefully, “Your friends said that you weren't answering their calls. I was- We were worried about you,"Jungwon amends. 

Your eyes prick at the reminder of what exactly had gotten you into your current state. You wipe furiously at your eyes, glaring out the window. "He shouldn't have bothered you with this shit. I'm sorry you had to come all this way Jungwon, I was just being stupid and dramatic."

 A mix of shame and anger swirls at the pit of your chest at the realization that once again you had troubled and burdened your friends. You know better, you silently reprimand yourself, chewing on the inside of your cheek. 

You push yourself up to your feet, ignoring Jungwon's warnings in your haste to get up. "I'll message them. You can go home I'm fine-" you wince, your words halting at the feeling of a sharp sting against your palm.

In a flash, Jungwon is by your side, firmly grabbing your wrist. "I told you to be careful. You are not fine. And I am not going to go home." He says firmly, staring into your eyes with a steely gaze. 

Dumbly, you nod back at him and he huffs, looking down and examining the beads of blood that have begun to pool in the crevices of your palm. "It doesn't look that deep but we should still disinfect it and wrap it. Do you have a first aid kit?" 

"In my room," you mutter . And Jungwon hums, promptly picking you up bridal style ignoring the startled gasp that escapes your lips. “There's glass on the floor," Jungwon cuts you off before you can protest, carrying you over to your room. 

He pushes the door open deftly with his shoulder, setting you down on your bed. You look at him with slight amusement, entertained by how seriously Jungwon was taking his job as your caretaker.

He looks at you expectantly and you smile, “The kit’s in my bedside table, second drawer,” you offer helpfully, to which he nods and begins rummaging through your cabinet. 

Unable to resist teasing any longer, you clear your throat and speak up, “You know you could've just gotten me my slippers or something instead of carrying me Jungwon,” you smirk. 

You laugh as he visibly pauses mid search, mumbling a "shut up", his ears glowing a faint red. Jungwon brings the first aid kit over to you, batting your hand away as you try to take it from him.

"I can do it," you offer, pursing your lips as Jungwon deadpans at you, pulling your injured hand into his lap. "Your dominant hand is literally cut and bleeding Y/N. How are you going to disinfect and bandage this big ass gash with only one hand?"

"I’ve seen people do it all the time in movies, it can’t possibly be that hard. I’ll be fine,” you whine, trying to yank your hand away from his grasp. 

Jungwon scoffs, flicking your forehead, "Stop being stubborn and just let me take care of you."

"I don't know if I can trust you to take care of me if you're assaulting your patients like this," you pout, rubbing your forehead. "At least put on a sexy nurse costume or something, it’ll make you look more reliable.” 

Jungwon doesn't dignify your joke with a response, focusing instead on your wound. He carefully wipes away the blood, checking for any stray pieces of glass. With a warning, he gently presses the antiseptic to your cut, whispering an apology when you wince. He diligently bandages your hand, turning it over and tracing the bandage gingerly to make sure it's entirely secure. You watch wordlessly as Jungwon’s fingers graze the curves of your hands and fingers, his touch feather light. 

Looking up at your uncharacteristic silence, Jungwon’s not quite sure what to make of the emotions that pool in your eyes. There’s a foreign intensity behind them and his eyes can't help but flicker down to your lips. The air is stifling and Jungwon wants nothing more than to close the distance, to draw the air he so desperately needs from your lips. 

Instead, he opts to look away, coughing awkwardly. "All done. You should probably change" he gestures to your wine stained dress. You look at him in contemplation, noting the slight flush on the back of his neck, watching as his Adam's apple bobs up and down as he swallows, eyes trained on your wall. 

Taking pity on him, you walk towards your dresser, letting the tension dissipate into the stale air. You rifle through your clothes, pulling out a pair of shorts and an oversized tee that either Chenle or Haechan had left behind during your group sleepovers. 

“Turn around, I’m gonna change,” you warn half-heartedly, waiting for a beat before starting to tug your dress over your head. Jungwon immediately turns, busying himself with his phone. He shoots both Chenle and Heeseung a text, assuring both of them that everything was alright, desperately trying to block out the sounds of rustling fabric behind him. 

Jungwon keeps his head bowed, eyes glued to his screen until he feels the bed dip next to him and a slight tug on the hem of his shirt. “You texted Chenle?” you ask casually, humming when he nods in confirmation. 

You try to feign nonchalance but struggle to meet Jungwon’s eyes as you prepare yourself for the conversation ahead. “So, he told you?”

"Yeah." Jungwon admits quietly. 

"About what happened today? Or everything.”

"Everything."

"Hm, I see.” you fiddle absentmindedly with Jungwon’s shirt, pulling at the stray threads in the frayed ends. 

“I'm sorry that he told me. And I'm sure Chenle's sorry he had to tell me as well. He was just worried about you,” Jungwon prods tentatively, unsure of your reaction. 

“No, I know. I get it. It’s my fault for not responding and putting him in that position in the first place.” you let out a puff of frustration. “ I just wish I could've told you everything on my terms, explained properly. This wasn’t how I wanted you to find out.” 

Jungwon tucks your hair behind your ear, nudging you encouragingly, “Then do it. Explain it to me how you would’ve if today didn’t happen.”

You take a deep breath, instinctively reaching out to play with Jungwon’s fingers for a sense of comfort and give him a wobbly smile. 

“So, like Chenle told you, my mom passed away a few days after giving birth to me. There were some complications during the procedure and she never recovered.

I know that my dad resents me for her death. That if he had the choice he would've chosen her over me. And I can't really blame him. The woman he fell in love with and built a whole life around, gone, and just for a baby he didn't have any attachment to yet.

At first I didn’t really understand the situation, so I did everything I could just to get even a speck of his attention. But as I grew older, I pieced together the truth from the whispers from my nannies and my dad’s staff. And then it became more than just looking for his attention, I felt like I had to prove my worth somehow. I had to prove that I wasn't just useless, that my mom hadn't given up her life for me just to amount to nothing.

I wanted to make him believe that her choice was justified. I don't think I'll ever be able to get my dad to think so. I’ve known that for a long time.” You draw a shaky breath, tears streaming down your cheeks slowly. Jungwon’s heart clenches at the sight and he pulls you into his lap, rubbing your back soothingly as you try to continue. 

“But then something like this happens, he gives me the slightest indication that something might change. And it's like I'm 7 years old all over again. On that stage holding a stupid trophy that's bigger than me. Flashing lights and photographers, searching in a sea of faces for the one person that will never be there.”

“And I'm so, so, tired of being disappointed,” your voice cracks with emotion, “Tired of even having any expectations. It happens every time.”

“ He left. He knew that I was waiting for him and he just left. With nothing but a stupid bottle of wine as a gift. Not a note that said happy birthday, or even goodbye.” you mutter bitterly. 

Your vision blurs with hot, angry tears, “He's never once wished me happy birthday. That's all I ever wanted from him. But he can’t give me that, he thinks spending money will help us both ignore the reality that he can’t stand to be around me. So I’m left with a  bottle of wine that's as old as me and probably costs more than someone’s yearly salary. Another reminder of everything he's given me and everything I will never amount to in his eyes.”

“And I was just so mad, I picked it up and threw it against the wall. I only ended up making a huge mess and getting hurt so I guess my plan backfired,” you laugh sardonically. 

“I probably should've sold it or given it to Chenle, so that was stupid of me but I just couldn't look at it anymore,” your voice dies into a soft whisper. 

Jungwon tilts your face up to meet his gaze, brushing away the stray tears in the corners of your eyes.

"Happy Birthday Y/N . I'm so glad that you're here and that I’m able to be by your side. Even if that means running across the city in the middle of the night" He says, knocking his forehead against yours affectionately. 

You give a watery laugh, eyes welling up at the sincerity in his tone. You lean your forehead onto Jungwon's shoulder "Thanks Yang Jungwon, it means a lot. I'm sorry for getting tears and snot all over your hoodie"

Jungwon snorts in response, smoothing over your hair, “Occupational hazard of being your best friend I guess.”

Best friend. You laugh to yourself at the absurdity of the situation. It was insane how in such a short amount of time Jungwon has carved out a space for himself in your heart. Your smile fades, your mood sobering slightly as doubts begin to creep back into the corners of your mind.

"Hey Jungwon?" you ask hesitantly. 

"Yeah Y/N?"

You’re unable to meet Jungwon’s questioning gaze, resolving to play with the strings of his hoodie instead. “You’ll tell me right if I'm being too much? Before you’re sick of me?” you ask softly. 

Jungwon leans back to look at your face with furrowed brows, “What the fuck are you on about Y/N, I’m not gonna get sick of you.”

You swat at Jungwon’s arm lightly, “You can't say that for sure. Everyone has limits and boundaries and unfortunately I have a tendency of finding those limits and pushing them unknowingly.”

You gesture to yourself with a wave of your hand. “This whole parental trauma, daddy issues thing, it can be a lot. And I have a bad habit of being overly attached and clingy to people. It's suffocating, I know. So just tell me okay? I’d rather know and dial it back than push you away and lose you entirely.”

Jungwon sighs and pulls you closer, placing a chaste kiss on your temple. “You're being ridiculous Y/N that's not gonna happen. I could never get sick of you. If anything you'll be sick of me.”

“Just promise me? Please?”

He rolls his eyes in exasperation, “Fine. If I wake up one day and decide that I’m suddenly sick of you, I promise you’ll be the first to know”.  

“Thanks Wonnie”, you smile in satisfaction, stifling a yawn behind the back of your hand.

"Aww, is my birthday girl tired?” he teases gently, glancing at your clock. 2:14 A.M.

“You should go to sleep now Y/N" Jungwon shifts you so that you’re laying on the bed and you quickly situate yourself under the blankets. Once he’s tucked you into your bed sufficiently, Jungwon stands with a slight stretch, ignoring the way his muscles protest at the movement. 

You cock your head in confusion, tugging him back by the sleeve of his hoodie "You're not staying?”

Jungwon blinks at you blankly, “I am, I'll just take the floor. Or the couch.”

You smile sleepily up at him, "Don't be stupid Jungwon." You scoot over, lifting the blanket and patting the empty space next to you in invitation.  

Jungwon merely gapes at you in response and you snicker at his vacant expression. 

“Jungwon, we literally cuddle in bed all the time, it's no different just because it's nighttime. Look, I'll even stay on my side of the bed okay?” You scoot back further to the edge of your bed, looking at him expectantly. 

Wordlessly Jungwon huffs, kicking off his shoes and shedding his hoodie. He clambers into your bed, exhaling lowly as he turns to face you. 

From the gap across the bed Jungwon watches as you give him a pleased smile, cheek squishing into the pillow and your hair splaying out behind you. He can't look away from the way your eyes shine in moonlight, staring back at him with a fondness that makes his heart stutter. 

“Night night, Wonnie," you whisper playfully, reaching out to lightly pinch at Jungwon's cheek. 

His eyes flutter close at the feeling of the pads of your fingers against his cheek and he groans internally.

Fuck it. Jungwon rolls his eyes in surrender, and pulls you closer to him, tucking you into the crook of his neck, a position that's way too familiar to him at this point. 

And maybe Jungwon really should reevaluate where he's at because the way his hand slides to rest at the small of your back is all too natural. And the feeling of your breath against his neck should really be unsettling but it’s not. 

He really should think about it, but right now it's nearly 3 AM and he doesn't have the energy to question how perfectly you fit against him. How you feel a bit too much like home. 

“What happened to me staying on my side of the bed,” you ask slyly in the most innocent tone you can muster. Jungwon can feel your barely concealed smile against his collarbone and punishes your taunt with a swift tug at your hair, enticing a snicker from your lips. 

"Shut up and go to sleep" he grumbles, and you laugh freely, burrowing comfortably into his arms. Jungwon can’t help but let his lips lift at the sound, and tightens his hold around you, waiting until he hears the faint puffs of your slumber before letting himself succumb to his dreams.  

prev masterlist next

a/n: chenle rlly is jungwon's biggest supporter asjks carrying the y/nwon ship.

my longest chapter yet hhh i hope y'all enjoyed . I kinda cringed but :) lmk ur thoughts n feelings . Jett voice: night night!

taglist: open! send me an ask to be added! <3

@woncloudie @itsactuallylina @ifearjwn @fadedluvv @mangowonyo @xiaoderrrr @shinsou-rii @aki1e @makiswrld @jaehaki @criyiy @ilovewonyo @zeraaax @climbingmandevillas @pkjay @flower-lise @koudnd @beomgyusonlywife

[alyhorse6]

I’ll See You Sunday

AN: I promise I’m working on any requests I have rn, but this hit me and I needed to get it down. This fic was 100% inspired by the fanart above by @lightsintheskye 🫡

AU Context/synopsis: Annette and William are both renowned medical professionals. Annette is a cardiothoracic surgeon, William is a cancer researcher, Wesker is still the captain of S.T.A.R.S. (except he's loyal and doesn't have ill intentions), and Y/n is a S.T.A.R.S. Alpha Team Member. Y/n and Wesker are particularly close. One night Annette & William have a highly honored banquet/award ceremony to attend and need someone to look over little Sherry for the evening. Surely Uncle Albert would be willing to help them out…

Warnings: These characters are nothing like their in-game personalities, but it’s my AU and I do what I want, intense fluff🤧

————————————————————————

It was around 3:30 in the afternoon when Wesker received a text from his stepbrother William asking him if he would be available to watch his niece. He didn’t open the message at first, instead, he panicked and texted one of his closest friends for help.

•*•*•*•

Are you available tonight?: Wesker

Y/n: Yeah… why?

I have an emergency: Wesker

Y/n: What happened?

William asked me to babysit Sherry, but I have no clue what to do with a kid: Wesker

Y/n: Albert Wesker. Are you kidding me.

What??: Wesker

Y/n: You said an emergency!

This is an emergency!: Wesker

Y/n: Whatever. What do you need me for?

I need you to come help me :): Wesker

Y/n: Aye aye, Captain🫡

Don’t mock me😑: Wesker

•*•*•*•

After speaking with Y/n, Wesker agreed to do it. William instructed him to arrive no later than 5:30, giving Wesker only 20 minutes to fly across town from the Police Station to the Birkins’ penthouse. In all honesty, Wesker dreaded this whole experience. It had nothing to do with Sherry, she was an angel, but something told him that it would be a long night.

He made it to the complex at 5:25 pm, relieved that he hadn't encountered any traffic police on his route. To meet his deadline, he drove at 35 miles per hour, which was 10 miles above the speed limit, through the bustling and chaotic streets of Raccoon City. In a hurry, Wesker dashed through the opulent lobby and made a beeline for the elevators, frantically hitting the up button. As soon as the elevator chimed, he strode in, elated to find it empty. He punched the button for the top floor, relaxed his body, and leaned against the back wall. Gradually, the elevator began its smooth ascent to the desired floor. The elevator came to a stop with a low hum, and the number "35" glowed brightly in the top right corner on a small screen. Wesker stepped out of the elevator and found himself in the entry room of the penthouse.

•*•*•*•

When do you think you'll be here?: Wesker

Y/n: I should be at the complex in ten

I'll see you when you get here: Wesker

•*•*•*•

Wesker waltzed up to the elaborate double doors that led into the home. He breathed in and held it as he knocked firmly, desperate to just get in and get his step-brother and his wife out and on their way to their banquet.

William greeted Albert with a warm smile as he answered the door, "Hey there, Albert! It's great to see you again!"

Wesker forced a smile, deeply unappreciative of the use of his first name, “Hey Will.”

Will leaned in to whisper, “Annette has been freaking out over this whole thing. I don't know if she’s more worried about leaving Sherry for this long or the event in general. This will be the longest we've left Sherry since she was born, but it’s been four months, it's gotta happen sometime.”

“I've got this Will, don’t worry. Plus I'll have help.” Wesker smirked

William narrowed his eyes, “Help? Who've you wrangled into helping you this time?”

“This time?? You say it like I never do anything on my own.” Wesker griped

“Just tell me who it is.” William huffed

Wesker rolled his eyes, “I asked Y/n to help me out.”

“Y/n? Is that the chic from S.T.A.R.S. that you’ve got a crush on?” William snickered

Wesker responded, but not without his jaw dropping slightly, “I do not have a crush on her! Crushes are for kids, which I am not.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever you wanna tell yourself,” William smirked

William eventually moved aside and allowed Wesker to enter. As they walked through the front doors, they found themselves in the luxurious living room that could have easily been featured in an exclusive millionaire's catalog. Wesker’s basic apartment looked like a shack compared to this singular room. He'd been here hundreds of times, and yet it never failed to slap him across the face every time he saw it. The room was filled with pretty potted plants, glorious gold detailing, and a coat of the finest beige paint on every wall.

William and Wesker stood around for a few minutes until Annette appeared from the hallway, holding little Sherry in her arms, looking like a munchkin.

“Here she is” Annette greeted with an open-mouthed smile.

Wesker reached a hand out to Sherry, “Hey there! It’s me, Uncle Albert.” The only time Wesker willingly used his first name was with Sherry. She was a weakness.

Sherry cooed a bit and then smiled when she saw her Uncle. Wesker grinned at the little person being so happy to see him. Annette passed the baby to him, and he cradled her softly, swaying back and forth.

“You two better get out of here, your banquet starts at 6:15.” Wesker shooed

William checked his watch and sighed, “I suppose you're right.”

Annette waved Wesker and Sherry goodbye and walked out to the elevator. William quickly turned back around to get one more little jab, “Good luck with your crush Weskie!” He smirked and ran off to join his wife.

Wesker huffed and looked to Sherry, “Don't listen to your silly goose of a father, I do not have a crush.”

Wesker walked toward the living room and sat down before feeling a buzz from his pocket.

•*•*•*•

Y/n: I'm in the lobby coming towards the elevator, make sure I can get in😘

Don’t you worry your pretty head: Wesker

Y/n: Awe you think I’m pretty?🥺

Definitely not.: Wesker

Y/n: And here I was thinking I’d get a date😪

•*•*•*•

About 10 minutes passed before a few soft knocks passed through the door. Wesker got up and opened it greeting Y/n with a kind smile, always unable to help but to smile with her around. Y/n smiled back and waved gently to the man, before giving a little wave and a grin to the adorable baby in his arms.

“Hello there Sherry! I’m Y/n, your Uncle’s friend!” She spoke softly

The infant giggled and smiled at the young woman in front of her. Y/n looked up to Wesker, “Has she ever laughed?? I don’t wanna steal that from her parents!”

“She has don’t worry. She was an early giggler.” Wesker soothed with a small smile. His favorite woman as caring as ever.

The two walked into the penthouse and sat down on the sofa side by side. Wesker would be a lying man if he failed to admit that being with Y/n in this type of setting made his face feel warmer, it was such a rare occasion for him to see Y/n outside of work or a work group. He wanted more of this.

The two sat and talked for a while, Sherry occasionally making sounds from Wesker’s arms, before eventually slowly starting to cry.

“Oh sweetie what’s the matter?!” Y/n fretted

Wesker handed her over to the woman. She didn’t smell, she didn’t seem sleepy, must be hungry. “Hey Wesk, could you heat up a bottle for her?” Y/n asked doe-eyed with worry

“Got it!” Already making his way to the fridge

Y/n followed behind him to the kitchen, delicately bouncing the little one on her hip. Both of the girls watched as Wesker tapped his finger on the counter waiting for the bottle warmer to ding. By now Sherry’s cries had died down some, but she still sniffled and shook in infant distress. Finally, the ding sounded through the room and Wesker removed the bottle, then tested the temperature on his hand. It passed the test so he handed it off to Y/n. She walked back over to the sofa and laid Sherry back in her arms, tipping the nub of the bottle to the baby’s mouth. Wesker joined the two and watched as Sherry started eating. Once she seemed content both Wesker and Y/n relaxed back into the cushions. Y/n faintly grinned at Sherry, while behind her Wesker happily grinned at the sight of her and his niece. Sherry stared brightly at Y/n’s face and grasped at her top, satisfied with her bottle.

Some time passed before Sherry finished. Afterward, Y/n burped her and then passed her back over to her Uncle. Wesker let her lay in his arms while the pair talked for a bit. At some point along the way Sherry got a little squirmy in his arms, so Y/n came up with an idea.

Y/n smirked mischievously at Wesker before asking, “Do they have something to play music on?”

“Yeah- why?” He eyed the young woman

“Can you turn on some Disney songs?”

Y/n asked, batting her eyelashes

Wesker handed Sherry back over to Y/n and got up to silently do as he was asked. He couldn’t bring himself to say no to any request Y/n asked of him. The music started, ‘Un Poco Loco’ from the movie Coco playing throughout the room. Y/n stood from her seat and started to bounce and slowly spin around the room while Sherry giggled. Wesker leaned on the counter and watched the two, giggling softly when Sherry slightly kicked her sock-clad feet. Y/n laughed while they danced to the music.

‘A Whole New World’ from Aladdin came on and Y/n looked over to Wesker, “Come dance with us.” A sweet smile on her face

Wesker couldn’t argue. He walked over to the pair and they swayed back and forth. Sherry stared up into her Uncle’s eyes and smiled. He smiled back at her and held her small hand as they swayed. Y/n admired Wesker as he watched his little niece. She couldn’t deny the crush that had formed on her Captain over the years working with him. He was always so kind to her, listening to her every word when they conversed, making her coffee throughout the day, and always greeting her with a smile. She couldn’t help but fall for the handsome young man when he was just so kind to her.

The song has long since changed, but the swaying continued. Over time Sherry grew sleepy, her blinking becoming slow and heavy. The two decided it was time to call it a night for the little one, carrying her to her nursery. Y/n changed Sherry’s diaper and clothes before swaddling her slowly. Wesker watched every step from over Y/n’s shoulder. It might’ve sounded weird to other people, but Wesker wanted something like this with Y/n. He wanted to spend each evening like this. He’d known the young woman for around 5 years now, and although he’d never admitted his feelings or made any moves on her, he liked her a lot. Maybe all the jokes about him crushing were true. He knew he felt differently about her, he just didn’t want to call it a crush and allow it to seem like some childish flit of life. He wanted so desperately to invite Y/n out to dinner, or the movies, or maybe even to stargaze on the outskirts of the city, but he got nervous anytime he thought about it.

Y/n slowly lowered Sherry into her crib, brushing some stray hairs out of her face once she relaxed into the mattress. She stepped out of the way and allowed Wesker to give her a small kiss on her forehead before they left the room. The two walked down the hall back out to the living room, opting to sit out on the roof to enjoy the warm evening air. They sat next to each other in the cushioned chairs and talked. They talked about work, their personal lives, anything. Eventually, it started to get a bit too windy to sit outside anymore, so they went back into the living room. They watched whatever random movie was on, but eventually, Y/n got sleepy too, her head slowly slipping down onto Wesker’s shoulder. He noticed as soon as it happened, looking down and smiling at the tired woman next to him.

They stayed like that for a good while. Peaceful, Sherry sleeping soundly in her room. Somewhere around 12:30, the hushed sound of the front door being unlocked could be heard. Annette and William quietly walked in, not wanting to wake their daughter. Annette immediately went to check on her baby girl, while William just silently smirked at his stepbrother. Wesker waved him off, and he left the two to join his wife in the nursery. Wesker sighed lowly, dreading the thought of waking Y/n up and this moment with her ending. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head softly, before quietly calling her name to wake her. The woman stirred lightly, slowly opening her eyes and looking around.

She came back to the present when she spotted Weaker and smiled gently, “Hi”

“Hi” he whispered back with a small grin

Y/n sat up slowly, stretching her arms and yawning along the way. She looked back over to Wesker, dreading the idea of getting up.

“I'll walk you to your car,” he murmured

Y/n hummed lowly, “Yes, please.”

The two stood from the sofa and walked out to the elevator. The ride down to the lobby was slow. Wesker chewed on the inside of his cheek, debating on whether he should ask Y/n out to dinner. The elevator dinged, signaling their arrival to the lobby. They walked over to the garage elevator and descended to their cars. Wesker walked Y/n to her car, he could tell she was still kind of sleepy.

“Do want me to just give you a ride home? You're sleepy and I want you to be safe,” he offered

Y/n looked over at him and blushed, “I'll be okay, thank you though.”

“Well… could I at least maybe take you to dinner? Just you and me,” he mumbled sheepishly

A smile spread on Y/n’s face as her blush grew, “I'd like that a lot”

Wesker smiled giddily, “Sunday… pick you up at 5:30?”

“It's a date!” Y/n cheered, turning to face the man next to her as they reached her car door

“It’s a date” Wesker mirrored

The two smiled at each other for a minute. Y/n speaking up first, “I suppose I better go home and get to bed…”

“You get your rest Y/n, sleep well.” Wesker agreed

Y/n smiled up at him, “You sleep too Wesk. I need you rested for our date”

Wesker grinned back at the young woman in front of him, “Bye my dear, I’ll see you Sunday.”

“Bye Wesk, I’ll see you Sunday.”

————————————————————————

AN: Should I continue this AU? And if so, if any of you guys have any name suggestions for the AU either comment them or send them in my ask box. Bye Angels!🤍

[clairedaring]

tag game ✨

huge thank you to the lovely zey @thasorns for thinking of me. i love you too (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

1. why did you choose your url?

no one remembers her but claire dearing from jurassic world will always hold a special place in my heart.

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.

poomphuripan - the bl sideblog that i started just because my main got deactivated for a bit but i guess for now, it's mostly uppoom and msi-focused. in december, it'll probably be torjj and spare me your mercy-focused. i think i'll probably just be using these for the ql series i have a crazy hyperfixation about.

huiyanan - a pentagon yanan/hui focus sideblog

coryjeacoma - my musical theatre sideblog for random audio bootlegs and sometimes musical gifs

ryuvachirawich - my unused (mostly lakorn) gifs blog for extra gifs i make but that doesn't make it into any main or sideblogs. at first i was trying to keep this sideblog lowkey but then i needed to tag the gifs w my gif tag anyway so i could search for them so disclosing is fine 🤣

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

2014... what do you mean it's been a decade since i started using tumblr.... time isn't real

4. do you have a queue tag?

i tried but i've given up on queue-ing in general so i don't. my tumblr is constantly in two modes: super active or going months without a single post lmaoooo.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

i wanted to be where all the gifmakers are but i have too much interests so this shall remains a multi-fandom blog or more like a "whatever media claire is consuming atm" blog 

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

dirk gently is the single most perfect holistic detective in existence. sometimes i'm too attached to my url and my icon, i don't think i can ever change them. headers i can but i haven't changed my url/icon for 3-4 years i think.

7. why did you choose your header?

i feel you linger in the air is THAT series for me. dethroned almost every other thai series on my all time fave list (i say almost because bad genius series is still holding its crown well)

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

i just checked and apparently it's my first and only merlin gifset 😅

9. how many mutuals do you have?

i have no idea but i love all my mutuals （づ￣3￣）づ╭❤️～

10. how many followers do you have?

i hit 1k recently. crazy to me because i've left this tumblr empty for months before starting being active again last october???

11. how many people do you follow?

4000+ but that's only because i'm too lazy to unfollow people. so yea i rarely see things on my dash. i just end up scrolling through my fave gifmakers tags to find things they make.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

i don't think so????? i mean the closest is probably me saying super random things on this tag.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

it used to be once a week... but these days it's really a daily routine lmao. although i'm pretty sure i'll leave my tumblr dusting once my stand-in ends... who knows... we'll see...

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

how can i? i'm so non-confrontational, i reblog things in private to argue with op 😭 lmao (arguments that op will never see lmao, i'm saving them and me both the trouble really). just enfp things.

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts

huh why do i never get them on my dash (⊙x⊙;)

16. do you like tag games?

sometimes i forget but i love being tagged in them because i get to know about all the great mutuals i have on here, especially music tags because i always get incredible new music recommendations

17. do you like ask games?

apparently i had my asks closed without knowing for quite some time so i haven't received asks for so long. maybe one day i'll do them but i have bad records of answering asks so ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

i'm not sure if being THE certified way apologist/way gifmaker qualifies her as tumblr famous but maybe sasa @zhouxiangs is the most famous mutual i have

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

let's call this mutuals whose editing skills i wanna steal (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)

lana @sherrymagic whenever you see me reblogging lana's joe sets every week, you'll see me gushing about the consistency in her coloring and that's because that's something i'm obsessed with, especially considering my stand-in's grim/dark cinematographic coloring. also i don't know how lana chooses the perfect lines from each eps to do her recap sets because most of the times i can't even choose between which scenes to gif.

eva @alienwlw eva makes the most beautiful lyrics set and is willing to do my most niche requests and i'm always looking forward to seeing her gifs because it's always so warm and grainy and crisp and i'm just like wahhhh *heart eyes emoji* every time

20. tags?

no pressure tagging anyone today ヾ(⌐■_■)ノ♪

[shmowder]

SO I was about to say that we never spoke on your BG3 blog, but I actually found one question by me, asking if you were playing the original Pathologic or P2 😂 By the time I found that blog you'd already pretty much moved on to this one (which is fine!). But I rb'd a couple fics to my sideblog. Certainly never imagined myself reading about a giant half-spider woman but here we are ♡ The thing about Minthara is that I adore her but I don't know anything about the rest of the game and it's too expensive for me to commit to right now - and I'm always hearing about her romance being bugged anyway.

Yuria <333 And Sister Friede but more importantly, Yuria! I love that you love her too! I confess that I never got past the Abyss Watchers but tbh I'm amazed I got that far. And at least my Ashen One got to meet Yuria (and heard her best line "And I, of course, am also thine" hehe). Good for you for getting through it! Bloodborne is the one Fromsoft game I've beaten and it was rough getting used to the Dark Souls combat, so I watched a walkthrough of the rest. And I've also watched a ~90 hour walkthrough of Elden Ring, which did put me to sleep occasionally lmao but I just don't have the willpower to play huge open world games anymore.

I almost finished a NG+ playthrough of Bloodborne recently, until I started the DLC and promptly got my ass handed to me and I was like hmmmm actually now is the perfect time to start a new SDV farm 🤔

But, I'm taking a little break because I've indeed started Patho 2 again!! It's the beginning of day 5, I'm using super easy settings again and I found my old notes of where the Dead Item Shop is every day and which items to save for upgrades etc. Despite that, I seem to be missing more than ever. I may have focused a little too much on trading and collecting herbs and caches. Forgot the bell rang on Day 3 and didn't gather the Apple Basket Gang rip :( (I noticed that Lara and Artemy both have dialogue about not being 30 yet, so there's that question out of the way) But on the bright side I have more eggs than I could ever need (maybe…) and I'm on my 3rd inventory upgrade.

Haha, based on that anecdote I'd say you know more Russian than I do. I know a lot of people listen to other things when playing games but I've never tried that except when hatching Pokemon eggs. I love hearing the in-game sounds and music. Victor and Yulia have the same theme playing in their houses!

Yes of course we can be friends! Requesting from writing blogs is what originally got me interacting with others, so, kind of like you, just the other way around 😅 Then I discovered it can be nice just to talk sometimes. It seems like you're having a good time on this blog! Chill is good. Part of me is still flabbergasted that there's a Pathologic x reader blog that exists and it's run by a great writer who obviously has so much love for the characters which is a huge plus <3 But I like the memes too :) I can't speak for other anons, but I always check my entire dash until I'm completely caught up.

Moving on… WHEN I TRANSLATED THE TITLE OF THE VICTOR X READER FIC!! Hooo boy, I'm a simple girl and the "You're good, my little dove, you're good. Despite it all, you're good" quote is one of my favorites. It's like you read my mind with the description - SOFT, TENDER, and UNSTABLE? Three of my favorite things 😇

So!! I am the human embodiment of this emoji while reading 🤭🤭🤭 Honestly so galaxy brained of you make it into a fic, I could never be upset about that. There's such an atmosphere to this from the very beginning, I don't know how to describe it but I want to bite it. Playing house with slightly off vibes, "Like handling a stray cat" OUGH. (I agree that'd he'd want to play at domesticity.) The way he notices everything, his solicitousness. Reader as sacrificial lamb imagery. "He takes and takes like you're the cure for his morose soul."

The immortality vs mortality thing! That's when I really got why this works so well as a fic instead of hcs. I love that it feels like a character study as much as a smut fic (and ofc I appreciate all the little details about time). TOP TIER SMUT ALSO. His endless patience while also being in emotional/spiritual/physical agony, him praising the reader's patience, he does seem like the type to draw it out a while - "He'll hide you from the world and everything dangerous outside" 😳

And the end!! What a beautiful, brilliant mind, what a sensitive fragile heart, what a lovely soul. My goodness. Just - [keysmash] [disintegrates]

That was AMAZING and you should be proud. Thank you for taking my request and running with it <333

If my overzealous reaction to the froggy chair birthday pic never made it through, thank you for that too! It's delightful.

Happy birthday!! 🧁🎉 I hope you enjoy the day.

🐿️ anon

You remembered my birthday! I love you!

God I was refreshing my notes waiting for your reaction over the fic. I'm so happy you liked it <33 Especially how you qouted your favourite lines and your reaction to them, that's literally the highest of praise I could receive. You understand the underlying themes, the whole playing house but something seems off, Victor's inner fits of monologue occasionally completely going off-rails and showing how lost in his head he tends to get. How his brain switches focus between topics constantly before snapping back to reality and vice versa.

Conflicted in everything. At times, he appears as if he's pleading with you, below you as loyal as a guard dog. At others he appears above you, pulling your strings with sheer authority and nothing else.

The whole turmoil of deciding to let Reader die a natural death, to be selfish and never allow them into the Kains grand scheme of immortality, to know you'll only exist by his side before your soul is lost to the cosmos forever.

I avoided bringing Nina by name but her presence is heavy in each line of the story. How much he would let you hurt him and others as much as you want like she used to do, how he lets your sins slide and sweeps your wrongs under the rug. How he clings to your mortality because part of his resents humanity for taking his wife away, for stealing his own life and future away.

The whole wings and feather symbolism. Immortality is the wings the Kains are sewing together one thread at a time, each feather plucked being a brilliant person's soul. That eventually, maybe they too will ascend past the larva stage and be able to live freely with no fear of death much like Icarus flew above the seas without regards to his father's words. They're flying straight into the sun and they mistake its blazing fire for the heavens above.

His little dove petname fitting perfectly with the Icarus symbolism, with you being a beautiful bird he wants to keep caged in the mortal real out of selfishness, out of the desire to finally call someone his own. All his life he has give for the future of humanity, both his wife and two kids turned into chess pieces to be sacrificed in times of need.

And that's fine that's okay. He can handle it. His family may belong to the future, they may belong to mankind and the utopia they're slowly shaping. He is strong and pragmatic, he can more than understand why heavy costs and live with the consequences. He will carry that burden of guilt indefinitely.

But you, oh you.... He won't allow it. You have to slip away from their clutches, from his own sharp claws. You won't belong to the future, you will belong to the present forever with him, forever to him.

I enjoyed writing it so much. I started as Headcanons but the words piled up and the sentences started weaving themselves on their own. It was so beautiful, I didn't have the heart to trim the growth and force it back into the headcanons mould, so i let it blossom into a full story even if it meant more work.

Headcanons are usually effortless, stories are not. I had several open tabs by the end of writing it searching for various idoms, symbolism and word synonyms. Looking through Victor's qoute then remembering the latin endearment term for dove.

I really wanted to paint the picture of how he makes loving you a form of self-flagellation, but I had to keep the message subtle so it shows how well he hides it. How on the surface you can easily mistake his infatuation for any adoring partner, but deep down he's completely unstable behind the calculated hardened face. I'd argue that he was as crazy as Nina if not even more. He just happened to be better at hiding it. It was an elaborate plan for him to play the role of the reliable soft-hearted self-sacrificing leader to win people's favour, to paint the Kains in an angelic light so their women may be as cruel as their hearts desire.

Again, thank you for leaving such a sweet message afterwards. People rarely do, you get accustomed to fulfilling requests then throwing your writing into the ocean after posting it. The reblogs and likes are good and all but I just want to hear another human's words at times you know? Another soul's opinion, something that proves that this exists and was read by an actual person rather than a number counter going up.

Although oh my god you read THAT Minthara fic?? A beautiful webbing?? IT'S ONE OF MY MOST PROUD WORKS! One of my most ambitious too! The descriptive scenery in that fic took a lifetime out of me, so much blood and tears poured onto the layout of the garden, of the sussur tree and blood rose. Writing it felt like my magnum opus at the time, although now I'd say Lingum Vitea holds the spot for the amount of Latin I had to research for that Burakhovsky fic.

I'm so glad you liked that fic! They're my favourite children <333 I like the rest too but sometimes I write things purely out of passion and they shine brighter than the rest in my eyes.

You've already started your P2 playthrough hell yeah! I hope it goes well and it's fun! I actually missed the apple basket gang meeting too in my playthrough- I thought it was scripted to be missed because it directly coincident with the Bachelor calling people to town hall and proclaiming quarantine so I thought oh, it must be cancelled duh! I didn't realise you could still walk to it ah-

You can never have too much eggs, trust me.

Being a trader hoarder is good! you'll eventually learn which people overpay for which items and look out for them. Usually trading is rng depent on which npc you meet on the road to your current mission because straying from the path means losing precious time.

Good for beating bloodborne and going on ng+! Hell yeah! I've never played it but it seems hard bc of the parries and no shield. I miss my shield in ds3 :( During the end of the game, my brother was watching me play and he tricked me into going to the end boss unprepared. He claimed it was just another npc for a quest and I didn't know it was the end boss bc I didn't watch anything about dark souls before playing it- I just walked to the soul of cinder all like "omfg hiii bestiee :3 " then got stabbed.

BUT I FUCKING BEAT HIM IN ONE TRY! EVEN WHEN I WAS TRICKED AND ALMOST DIED. I managed to clutch with my trustyyyy shieellldd.

But also I died to that weird balls tree 90+

I am not exaggerating, I genuinely couldn't handle that lame mini boss tree. I killee the abyss watchers in two tries and the soul of cinder in one but a fucking tree is responsible for 70% of my deaths through all of the game.

I'm celebrating my birthday today. it's not going well but at least I have a lot of cake and will buy myself flowers in an hour after the shops open. I got cheesecake! I love cheesecake! I think Yulia would like cheesecake or is she more of a dark chocolate person? I still have your request for her nsfw hc so don't worry it wasn't swallowed by tumblr.

Honestly I can't believe I'm the only pathologic x reader blog- Seems almost blasphemous tbh. I hope more pop up in the future, this fandom is surprisingly chill and nice. Especially for such a hardcore game.

I hope your day is amazing <3

Oh and I did receive your froggy chair submission! I just wasn't sure whether to reply to it publicly or not in case you wanted to stay anonymous to others on this blog. I'm glad you liked the meme I threw together and my other memes on this blog hehe. I like making them, it's like visual storytelling.

[dxsole]

—MUNDAY DASH GAME

———  BASICS! ♡

NAME! ♡ -     Dex!

PRONOUNS! ♡ -     she/her!

ZODIAC SIGN! ♡ -     taurus! strong like bull!!!

TAKEN OR SINGLE! ♡ -     single!!

———  THREE  FACTS! ♡

1! ♡ - i collect converse shoes! :3 not for like,,,a real real collection but i just have a whole lot of em,,,my pride n joys are three limited edition Gorillaz ones,,,,bless

2! ♡ - uh oh god i never know what to put here uhhh i collect rocks??? i’m trying to teach myself how to classify them?? i’ve got some gems n minerals and such,,,nice variety of pretty rocks,,,love em

3! ♡ - my current hyperfixation is my flight rising dragons,,,,i got lore babes,,,,they’re adorable,,,pls ask me about them i’ve been bursting at the seams to talk about em i’m begging

———  EXPERIENCE! ♡

PLATFORMS USED! ♡ -    i’ve only ever rped on Tumblr and sometimes on Discord but idk why i don’t vibe well on discord?? it feels too personal...i want everyone to see what i’m doing,,,i guess???

———  MUSE  PREFERENCE! ♡

FEMALE, MALE OR NONBINARY! ♡ -     i do make a lot of dudes, don’t i??? not sure why???? but didi’s my main bitch so??? idk mate

MULTI OR SINGLE! ♡ -   [me but i’m vogueing] MULTI ALL THE WAY! [does the splits] I CAN ONLY HANDLE LOGGING INTO ONE BLOG AND THAT’S IT BABEY

FLUFF / ANGST / SMUT! ♡ -     uhhh i do??? silly dialogue and murder buddies and subtle horror and deep convos and domestic living and smooches. and yeah there’s the Fuckin’™ too.

PLOT / MEMES! ♡ -    I do better with memes tbh! i have no problem with plotting but real talk,,,i wing it,,,,i raw dog,,,,i’m just vibing sweetcheeks

TAGGED BY! ♡ -  @ofgentleresolve @ @alxnetxgether // thankies~!!

TAGGING! ♡ -  i love u all, pls steal if u wanna do this and tag me!!!

[barzzal]

about and navigation

hi here’s a mobile about/navi you can look thru in case you’re new to my blog and wanted to gtk me ♡

name: ally

age: 20+

pronouns: she/her

sign: virgo

mbti: entj

teams:

main: islanders, penguins, avalanche

i live blog so you might want to filter the ff just in case bc we tend to clog up the dash during game night: #isles lb, #avs lb, #pens lb

important links:

→ find me at: solaange

→ blog inbox

→ writings and gif sets

→ writing guidelines

this is only a side blog. meaning, i don’t follow and like thru this blog at all. my main is at solaange so if you see that user lurkin’, don’t fret cos that’s me!

tagging system:

my stuff (writings/creations)

→ edits, op, gif sets, interviews

→ imagines, blurbs, headcanons

→ barzzal: fic recommendations

personal posts

→ text posts

→ ask box

→ queued posts

→ about me posts

→ tag games

→ feedbacks

→ mentions

everything hockey related

→ general

→ videos

→ shitposts

a few things to know about me:

— living the barzal and crosby life -ˋˏ religiously  ˊ-

— i write imagines and make gifs! / do not repost and or steal any of my work + gifs (no matter how bad they are) on other platforms ie. twitter, instagram, inc. tumblr

— the realest hockey quote is still the one where joey said “hockey was a big mistake” bc hun, it is. i dove head first and never came back up

— i love mat when he’s speaking french cos he kinda looks like a smol bèbè. however, tito speaking french? don’t ask me about it i have a weakass pussy

— i’m an adult poc so pls pls lmk if you’re a minor before you interact with me. i don’t mind chatting with yalls but i tend to say things that would for sure get me to jail and i don’t think i’ve watched enough prison break for me to escape that shit

— i have a soft spot for captains ang goalies but i’ve never wanted anything else than to be dicked down by a d man. (ryan graves, i’m talking to u)

— forwards are cute too but they do be sloppy sometimes,, mathew i’m looking straight at you don’t you dare look away

— my ass is pretty much owned/legally allowed to be railed by mat barzal, sidney crosby, tyson jost, andre burakovsky, and sebastian aho only.

players and teams you’ll often see on my blog:

in alphabetical order / (*) main hockeys

carolina hurricanes

andrei svechnikov* | xxxvii

sebastian aho* | xx

colorado avalanche

andre burakovsky* | xcv

cale makar | viii

mikko rantanen* | xcvi

nathan mackinnon | xxix

tyson barrie (i know i know. but for the sake of my sanity, let him stay here)

tyson jost* | xvii (simply can’t deal w this rn)

the whole roster actually

dallas stars

braden holtby

dennis gurianov*

jake oettinger

jason dickinson

roope hintz

tyler seguin | xci

montreal canadiens

carey price | xxxi

new jersey devils

nico hischier

ryan graves* | xxvii

pk subban

new york islanders

anders lee

casey cizikas

anthony beauvillier* | xviii

ilya sorokin*

jean gabriel pageau

mathew barzal* | xiii

matt martin

noah dobson

oliver wahlstrom | xxvi

pittsburgh penguins

evgeni malkin

kris letang

pierre-olivier joseph* | lxxiii

tristan jarry

sidney crosby* | lxxxvii

philadelphia flyers

philippe myers | v

travis konecny* | xi

vancouver canucks

elias pettersson* | xl

zack macewen

seattle kraken

jordan eberle

st. louis blues

colton parayko

tampa bay lightning

mathieu joseph* | vii

toronto maple leafs

mitch marner* | xvi

travis dermott | xxiii

what in the fucking fuck is this fuckery

marc andre fleury

disclaimer: for obvious reasons, players that have openly or have been exposed of their bigotry, oppressive and privileged tendencies, esp. those that have faced issues concerning assault/abuse, are off this blog. this is a safe space for all, so if you support men that are racists, bigots, abusers, and/or oppressors of any kind, please do not interact with me nor hit the follow button.

[rubberbandballqueen]

tagged by @seren-dippy-tea~~ :D :D 

♡ what do you prefer to be called name wise? these days i go a lot more by hua online!! if you scroll far back enough into my blog to find more of these tag games you’ll probably find my real name

♡ when is your birthday? april 26

♡ where do you live? california

♡ three things you are doing right now? impulse making a picarto.tv account so that i can stream myself writing fanfiction, petting my stuffed animals bc they’re soft, and restraining myself from obsessively checking ao3 for comments and kudos

♡ four fandoms that have piqued your interest right now? i’ve been in bnha hell for 2.5 years now and that hasn’t changed. every day i wonder how much longer i will be in bnha hell. other than anime i never talk about on this blog, i’ve been sloooowly getting through taz!! i finished balance back in march or april, and i’ve decided to skip over amnesty rn and jump into graduation bc that’s what’s fresh on my dash. i like the firbolg best but i’m on episode five rn so maybe that will change. i’m being drawn back into winx club lately, but mostly to just watch the show and complain about its bad writing. hhhh  can’t think of a fourth one

♡ hows the pandemic treating you? i stay indoors all day, writing fanfiction and playing minecraft with my friends on the server i host that gets really laggy if more than four people join at once. we have a hidden gay bar dedicated to lil nas x hidden behind my giant map of the world and a server-mandatory texture pack that changes all the armor into maid outfits it’s great. 

♡ a song you can’t stop listening to right now? been hit by another one of those two birds by regina spektor moods, but in like, a good way

♡ recommend a movie? my mind went from spiderverse (last movie i saw in theaters) to the matrix (last movie i saw) fight club (another classic r rated movie) to to all the boys i loved before (???) and i’m gonna just leave it off at that station. treat yourself to a good romcom.

♡ how old are you? 19

♡ school, university, occupation, other? chem major just finished first year going into teaching and will probably be chucked into a classroom for my fourth year and the prospect of its soonness floors me every time

♡ do you prefer hot or cold? when you live in a valley you enjoy the dry heat. SPECIFICALLY the DRY heat because my college is by the beach where it’s HUMID and i’m constantly just @ the locals because it’s 76F outside why am i sweating?? i shouldn’t be sweating until it hits at least 90F!!! fuck you!!!!!

♡ name one fact others may not know about you? on this blog i don’t think most of you know i almost had a fake boyfriend december 2018 as an elaborate revenge scheme/apology plan on my ex-middle-school-crush-turned-chem-rival. i always have to say almost because he backed out at the last minute and i let him.

♡ are you shy? yes. if i send you an ask off anon it means i already know you love me and feel secure talking to you.

♡ do you have any preferred pronouns? she/her mostly? saying that doesn’t feel 100% right if i think about it too hard, so sometimes i’ll use they/them too. if i don’t think about it then she/her works

♡ any pet peeves? hhhhh when kids spend more than one sentence explaining their answer. please i’m begging you do not derive the density formula for me please--

♡ whats your favorite “dere” type? i’m a certified and licensed tsundere

♡ rate your life 1-10. adhd gives me zero sense of scale so i can’t feasibly answer this

♡ what’s your main blog? this one

♡ list your side blogs and what they are used for. i have. an anime sideblog. where i’ll occasionally tell them about this blog but if my Cool Mutuals (which is all of them) find out how much of my brain is dedicated to wanting to see two specific fictional characters kiss via scrolling through that blog i will die.

♡ is there anything you think people need to know about you before being friends with you? i'm not gonna message you first unless you’ve messaged ME first at LEAST five times but if i follow you or i see you in my notifs ily

tagging @stardust-make-a-wish and @500tabsopenatonce-500tabso-pen!!

[cyberlife-three]

get  to  know  the  mun!                                                   repost,  don’t  reblog.

———  BASICS  !  ♡

(PEN)NAME  :  Screeny!

PRONOUNS  :  they/them

ZODIAC  SIGN  :  libra sun, leo moon, aquarius rising

TAKEN  OR  SINGLE  :  single

———  THREE  FACTS  ! ♡

I have eight cats! If you’re ever feeling down, hit me up for some cat content!

I’m a jack of all trades when it comes to art/hobbies! Embroidery, soap making, sculpting, painting.. You name it, I’ve probably at least tried it! Though I mainly work with pixel art, sculpting, and miniatures usually!

I’m currently in the process of making a farming witch game right now! If you’d like to see the progress I’m doing, i have an account called @witches-of-starfall​ where

———  EXPERIENCE  !  ♡

I’ve been roleplaying since about 12, so about eight or nine years of experience? I’m 20 years old now! I’ve roleplayed on omegle text, msparp, paigeeworld, discord, and tumblr! If you wish to rp privately in a personal discord server just let me know!

———  MUSE  PREFERENCE  !  ♡

I don’t really have preferences! I do have ADHD and sometimes certain rps are more attractive to my brain and I will hyperfixate on one or two rps, but I try to respond in a timely manner. Don’t ever hesitate to come up with new ideas with canon or ocs!

———  FLUFF  /  ANGST  /  SMUT  !  ♡    

FLUFF  :  I love fluff! If it easily gets stale for you, then I understand, but my muses are softies at heart! They’ve got all the love to give!

ANGST  : I am,,, a baby when it comes to angst lmao. With the type of ADHD I have, I tend to feel emotions a lot stronger than normal and can easily end up crying from too serious of angst. Death is also a trigger for me and can make me spiral, so main character deaths are normally off the table unless it’s an android who can be revived. Otherwise I can try to provide some angst, but I definitely would prefer hurt/comfort rather than pure angst.

SMUT  : i am very easy going with smut! If you have a guilty pleasure kink you’ve been wanting to rp but just can’t find any interest for it, 9 times out of 10 I’m there to provide! My muses tend to be more submissive, but they can be dominating if need be! Just hit me up because there’s a select few kinks that are a hard no for me. Otherwise you can just send an ask and see where it goes if you don’t care for plotting!

PLOT  /  MEMES  : i’m fine with either! I’m very good with spontaneous asks and can make general answers that can be turned into plots if the sender prefers it! Though I know some people like to plot, so just let me know what you prefer!

tagged by: From the dash/general tag of @rt-600s !

tagging: Anyone who’d like to!

[redemptioninterlude]

🖐️ bonus non muse: jet for faye! (not my muse but who said i cant)

5 times touched meme ( accepting ) + @cosmicstrength // jet

ended up being so fucking long soooo cutting for the dash ♡ just saying, but tiff really chose violence on this day 

001. kitchen mishaps ;  Faye’s never really learned how to cook - she doesn’t know why. Wakes up knowing nothing about it, finds that the world doesn’t even really have the ingredients that she can vaguely remember. In 70-some odd years, the foods that she might have found comfort in have long gone extinct, no lobster, no kobe beef, no sushi...! It’s all made anew, with, mutations and changes to it all having come along the way, and, with her newfound life of absconding from responsibility and vagrancy, cooking comes near last what she cares to learn about.

But on the Bebop, that doesn’t always fly. Jet loves to cook (the frilly apron gives it away, an odd dash of peony pink against his otherwise drab uniform), and, Faye, well... it’s hard to keep her out of any place where she’s told not to be, and the kitchen is his domain. And so, WHY NOT WATCH from time to time, a chair spun backwards, leaning into its back while she watches his as he cooks. He makes the most out of nothing - and they never really thank him for it, do they. They should. The words are on the tip of her tongue, fizzle, die, grave.

“Can you show me how you do it?” it’s for survival, she tells herself. God knows she’s been in this position often enough, nothing but takeaway food and empty packets, she could go so much longer if she knew how to do this, even if part of her SNEERS at the idea of it. Traditional roles never really felt right to her, but she leans in to take the wooden spoon from his grasp, her arm against his as she physically leans in on his space. The wok in front of her, her features scrunched as she contemplates the movements that he’d made, showcasing it in smaller motions for him to provide his own encouragement - “Like this?”

002. weapons grade ; They all have their own signature piece. Faye’s is an Austria .45 that she picks up in a game of poker on one of the moons of Saturn, the first time that she’s really out on her own and trying to figure out what the fuck she’s going to do next. It’s her playing wait staff while being paid cash until some drunk customer tells her that he wants something pretty at the table and they ask her to play. MAKE HER, is more like it, but she likes to pretend there was an element of choice behind it. She was lousy with cards back then, but he was worse, and there’s truth to the fact that the house always wins, isn’t there?

She tells him this story as the pieces are pulled apart with rhythmic ease, the two of them crowded around that shitty coffee table that looks as if it’s on the last legs of its life. For such a sad story, she keeps it in PRISTINE CONDITION, the two of them making idle chatter while she does, palms stained, unlike herself, in places with black and gunpowder. “I always wondered what it’d be like to shoot a gun. At first it felt so hard. But the less you saw the target as a person, the easier it became. Then I realized what kind of trade off you had to make. How sad that was. But hunger doesn’t really care for sadness, does it.”

A hand closes over hers. Jet doesn’t even have human warmth from there, metal hand, a strange reminder of a former life. Faye doesn’t shrug him off angrily the way she might have in another moment, lets it linger because, she knows he’s just trying to be kind in the only way that he knows how to be. THEY’RE EMOTIONALLY CONSTIPATED on this ship, but at least they can do small things like this, sometimes, to ground themselves when everything else feels free-floating.

003. aces wild ; “Charlie Parker, Charlie Parker. You always talk about CHARLIE PARKER, but take it from me, Charlie Parker wasn’t some mythic presence at the gambling tables.” she’s the dealer this round - and she wins, every time. Jet, despite the get up he wore when they first met, is hardly the kind of high roller that one might expect him to be, though she supposes for someone who doesn’t chat, he’s doing pretty alright. But his excuses to play or not play are far too rooted in superstition and habit, and it’s far too easy to read - maybe she feels sorry about it, but she’s trying to pick it all apart, slow. Make sure he doesn’t lose his shirt next time they face off against one another.

Plucks another card, deals it to him on the table. He reaches for it, but her fingers haven’t moved from the surface of it, a harder stare and narrowed eyes. “No. I don’t even need to look to know you’re already 1 from 21. This isn’t the right kind of choice. If you’re trying to think about this logically, you’ll fail. Telling me you think you’ll win because of some dream about Charlie Parker isn’t going to CHANGE THAT. You need a better winning strategy than this, Jet, if you’re ever going to graduate from the kiddy tables.”

But he takes it, anyways, stubborn as always, Faye sighing as she leans back, arms cradled behind her head. Doesn’t miss the way his eyes light up though, as he thrusts the card in her face to prove the point. The ace of spades. WELL WHAT DID YOU KNOW? Maybe Charlie Parker wasn’t so far off... not that she says anything - just a sound of disgust, a rolling of eyes, showy. Still. He collects the chips, and she collects his chores. Amen.

004. childcare duties ;  Ed’s locked in the bathroom - that’s what Jet says at least, when he comes knocking down her door. Doesn’t know what to say but he asks, or stutters, over asking her to check in, as if realizing for the first time that the kid’s a little girl still, and maybe hopes that Faye might be able to SUMMON UP some kind of maternal instinct to help them ply or bribe her back out. There’s water coming from underneath the door, he says. Means that he thinks that it’s pretty dire. He’ll take on her cooking duties then? Alright then. A deal is made.

Faye talks to Ed beneath the crack of the door, coded things, not that it’s anything is ever understandable out of that girl’s mouth. But eventually the door opens, and Faye slips inside - the sound of the water as it turns off, the flow no longer mop and bucket worthy, or at least for now. The hushed sounds, a quiet as Faye seems to EXPLAIN SOMETHING to the other girl... 5 minutes later, the door opens, and Ed bursts out, arms out at each end as she makes airplane noises and zooms off down a hall, Faye within it still, checking out her hair as water pools about her shoes.

Jet still stands outside, as if confused, Faye slipping into the narrow confines of the hall as her hand taps at the man’s arm, gravely. “She’s A WOMAN now.” the look on his face, fixed in confusion until something slow begins to dawn. That temporary unsureness - then that low grade horror that seems to sink deeper as it all begins to click into place. “She’s fine. But I’m gonna need to take off for a bit with some cash. Someone’s gotta buy her supplies and uh... no offence. But I can’t imagine you or Spike volunteering.”

005. repair mission ; Spike is going to die. She knows it when the gun goes off and he keeps walking, determined, to find his death at the hands of the past that cradled him unto his grave. Perhaps she could have come back sooner, she would have, if she knew what was coming, what to BRACE FOR. Maybe the ship wouldn’t have been damaged like this if she was, maybe they would have done better if Ed was still on board, she’s filled with what ifs, she’s choking on regret. But from sobbing, slumped, she needs purpose, she needs something to hold onto.

So she stands, and she finds herself in the main rest area where, Jet is nursing a bullet wound of his own. Asks him what happened, and it’s the same grim story, the both of them with downcast eyes, the pain that’s there for realizing how SMALL AND TEMPORARY their time together has been. What’s left? Can they carry on? They’re carried their own lifetimes of disappointment between them, something they rarely talk about, don’t know how to address. Still though, she bends, picking up the cotton swabs and the alcohol, soaking one with the other before handling him the bottle.

Takes to the task of cleaning him up. She’s better at it than people give her credit, maybe from her own needs to have to keep herself alive, again and again despite the way that she’s like, always on the run. You only have so many emergency doctors along the way when things GO BAD. Bandage this. Hold your tongue. They’re still alive, aren’t they? And they have the strength to continue on. “Think you can hold it together?” Faye doesn’t even glance up, there’s a hardness within her stare. “... he’s only got us to save him. We have to at least try.”