#◟◦ ( about ) ･ jesse livingston

[starliiqhts]

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birth name: jesse wade livingston birth date: october 26, 1978  current age: 46 zodiac sign: scorpio sun, virgo moon, aries rising (x) alignment: chaotic neutral  gender: male place of birth: chicago, illinois  ethnicity: english, polish, german, irish education: he graduated from wheeling high school in 1996. occupation: professional wrestler, tattoo artist, tattoo shop owner

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positive traits: outspoken, genuine, witty, protective  negative traits: confrontational, prideful, unapologetic  biggest fears: abandonment, betrayal  what’s more important- sex or intimacy: intimacy thoughts on true love: he was never a romantic until he met his wife, and now, he’s thinking that his original stance was correct.  ever been in love: yes leader or follower: leader. his refusal to follow others’ rules has gotten him in trouble, but he is headstrong in his own beliefs.  dealing with stress looks like: he’s not proud of it, but he can be an asshole when he’s stressed. he can be snippy with people, and it’s best to just avoid him when he’s stressed. he’s gotten better at becoming a calmer person in his older age though.  morning person or night owl: morning person. well - neither, really. he likes to sleep early and wake late, but he feels better about himself when he gets up early and is productive. he also kind of has to be now, he’s a dog father, and also a busy guy on top of that.  spontaneous or always needing a plan: even when he was younger, he liked having a plan. long term and short term, he liked having things to work towards. 

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eye color: hazel hair color: brown height: 6’1 weight: 218 tattoos: he’s lost count of how many tattoos he has, his body is covered in them. he has a variety of different ones with different meanings - some special ones, like his ‘straight edge’ piece on his stomach, the ones dedicated to his loved ones like his sister. he also has sillier ones, like the pepsi logo, just because he likes it.  piercings: ears, lip, tongue, nipples - though he hasn’t worn piercings anywhere other than his ears in quite a few years now. 

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sexual orientation: straight  relationship status: single past relationships: he dated around a bit when he was in his twenties, a couple of long term relationships (three years with another wrestler named iris, two with another named cammy), but it was in his early thirties that he met the woman who would become his first wife - janie. technically they had met before, they’d worked together for a couple years, but they didn’t get close for a little while. they began dating in 2010, and a few months after their third anniversary, they officially tied the knot. when the beginning of the end snuck up on him, he wasn’t prepared for it. he truly didn’t see it coming. discovering her infidelity had shocked him because nothing had seemed off, she seemed so in love still, and he knew he was. they separated legally, but before divorcing, decided to try to work on things one last time. but jesse just couldn’t get past it. they’ve been divorced since 2022, but unfortunately, a relationship like that isn’t easy to move on from. they still see each other every so often, still reach out, still call in late nights. he can’t see himself ever getting back with her, he can’t get past the betrayal of her affair, but getting over her completely has been hard. he’s tried and failed to see other people, but it’s never worked. he’s not ready.  thoughts on marriage + kids: he’s been married before, and doesn’t know if he can see himself doing it again. dating? yes, eventually. but marriage? he doesn’t think so. 

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class status: upper financial status: wealthy home description: spending most of his life on the road, his home base was chicago for the majority of the time. then in 2019, he moved to los angeles with his wife, who had retired from wrestling and was stepping into acting, and he wanted to support her. when the divorce happened, he debated moving back home to chicago, but he’d put roots down in los angeles, and liked it there more than he thought. he moved to a couple new places after the split, but now thinks he’s found a permanent place. he’s been living in the same house since spring of 2024, a three bedroom house in a suburban area. it's just enough space for him and his dog - a living room, kitchen, dining area. he has his bedroom, and a guest room, and two bathrooms. he also has a pool, and the garage has been turned into a home gym. family life: he was born to margie and tyler livingston. tyler is now 72, margie is 70. tyler was unemployed for most of jesse’s young life, making money by dealing, and margie was the same on/off, and also worked a number of different jobs - waiting tables, bartending, etc. jesse’s not sure what either of them are doing now. the couple met as teenagers, living in the same neighborhood, and eventually started hooking up. they didn’t get married until after they had their first child, tommy, who is two years older than jesse. after jesse, they had four more children - kenzie (two years younger), harry (six years younger), vanessa (eight years younger), and mikey (eleven years younger). growing up, due to tommy’s immaturity, jesse felt like the oldest sibling. more than that, he often felt like the parent. his mom tried, but was dealing with her own addictions, and his dad was just unbearable. he used to get physical with all the kids, but none more than jesse, who liked to talk back the most. when he finally left the family, when jesse was sixteen, it was a blessing in disguise. hell, not even in disguise. jesse saw no downside to it. he was relieved. he’s had his issues with his family in their adult lives, but when they were young, all he wanted to do was take care of his siblings. tommy was the first one he fell out with. tommy had always gotten into trouble, but when he got arrested for stealing from their wrestling school at the age of 20, that was it for jesse. he stuck around for his younger siblings the longest he could, but now, he’s only on speaking terms with harry and vanessa. growing up, he was closest to kenzie, so cutting those ties hurt, but she’d fallen into her addiction and begun stealing from him, and he’d done all he could to help and she kept rejecting it. mikey didn’t develop an addiction like their parents, but he went down an alt right pipeline that got a bit too much for jesse and even the rest of the family. while vanessa unfortunately also developed that genetic trait that led her to addiction, she got sober, and jesse was happy to help her through it. she’s been clean for years and, along with harry, is one of his best friends. he hasn’t spoken to his mom since he was in his 20s, his dad since he left even though he has popped up a few times again since, and those weren’t easy choices, but he stands by them. pets: he has one dog, a rescue named tally that he adopted in 2015. he treats tally as his own child and even travels with him. 

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diet: he eats clean and semi-strict, but he doesn’t stress himself about it. he focuses on eating high protein, only having fast food a couple times a month, low carb but not no carbs. he loves food and refuses to torture himself by not eating the things he likes. it’s about moderation, and he balances it out with being active. drinking + drug habits: he is straight edge, proudly. after seeing so many people around him hurt themselves and others due to substance abuse and addiction, he knew from a young age he never wanted to touch the stuff. admittedly, he was more judgemental when he was younger, looking down on people who didn’t abstain, but once he was in his mid twenties, he had gotten off his high horse about it. religion: he is an atheist. health and disorders: other than the injuries he’s gotten over the years that have mostly healed, he’s got a clean bill of health. 

[justagalwhowrites]

Yearling - Ch. 30: Blood

Joel and Tommy run into trouble on patrol. A continuation of Yearling ch. 1-29 found on Tumblr here.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader

Warnings: Canon-typical violence. Plot points from TLOU2. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ Only 

Length: 7.5k

A/N: Hi y’all, I’m stashing this whole chapter below a jump because it’s been brought to my attention that the major event of this chapter is less common knowledge and more of a spoiler than I really realized it was. There is a major plot point for TLOU2 below. I’m sorry I didn’t tag the whole fic that way (going back to update that now) and I apologize if this spoiled things for people who were trying to go in blind. This is the first chapter with any big overlap and if you want to bow out now, I totally understand. My DMs are open if you want to know more without full spoilers and if there’s a way to keep reading without knowing the plot of TLOU2.

AO3 | Chapter One | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

“Dina kissed me.” 

“What!” You yelped and Ellie’s eyes went wide before she clamped a hand over your mouth. 

“Shhhh!” She looked around, her breath rising in front of her. But the only people out right now were inside the stable, a good 50 feet behind you and far enough away that you doubted any of them heard you, even if you were loud. “Jesus, Bambi…” 

She released your mouth and you tried not to giggle. 

“Sorry,” you whispered. “Good for you, kiddo! Told you not to count the girl out because she also fucks men…” 

“There’s no way she meant it,” Ellie rolled her eyes. “Get real.” 

“Why not?” You asked, brows raised. “Why shouldn’t she mean it?” 

“Because she’s Dina,” Ellie said, as though that explained everything. You just looked at her and she rolled her eyes again. “She was just trying to stir shit up because her and Jesse split up…” 

“Uh huh.” 

“And I was convenient,” she finished. “That’s it, that’s all it was…” 

“And you know this because you asked her, I’m sure.” 

“Fuck off,” she snapped. “Look, I didn’t drag you out here to figure that shit out…” 

“You sure about that?” 

“I dragged you out here,” she said, ignoring you, “to try and figure out what the fuck I’m supposed to do now.” 

“Kiss her again,” you shrugged. “That’s what I’d do…” 

“I’m being serious!” She hissed at you. “I have to go on patrol with her in like half an hour, what the fuck am I supposed to do?” 

You sighed and smiled a little, putting your hands in the pockets of the coat Joel had given back to you that morning. He said he hadn’t been wearing it but it had to have been hanging close enough to things he did wear and it smelled a bit like him. 

“First, you need to calm down,” you said gently. She looked like she was going to snap at you but you silenced her with a look. “I know it’s hard but regardless of how you want this to turn out, try not to be in your own head about it, OK? She’s still your friend and I’m guessing you want her to stay your friend, right?” 

“Duh.” 

“So eloquent,” you said and she rolled her eyes. “Look, you have two options. You can pretend it never happened and see if she brings it up or you can be up front about it and ask her.” 

“Is there a way to bring it up without looking like a desperate fucking loser?” She asked, brows raised. 

You shrugged. 

“Tough line to walk but I think you’ve got it in you.” 

“Jesus…” 

“Ellie,” you took her shoulders and made her actually face you. “It will be OK. Might be awkward for a bit but it’s not the end of the world. I promise. You can talk to her. She’s your friend for a reason and it’s because you’re kind and you’re smart and you’re funny. Even without the help of Will Livingston. None of that shit changes just because you kissed. Alright?” 

“Yeah,” she said, dropping her head to your shoulder with a heavy sigh. You put your arms around her and gave her a little squeeze but when she pulled back from you, her eyes were narrowed. “You’re in a weirdly good mood.” 

You frowned. 

“No I’m not.” 

“Uh yeah, you are,” she said, stepping back and looking you up and down as though she she were inspecting you. You just raised your eyebrows at her, expectant, when her mouth dropped open for a moment before she shifting to a shit eating grin. 

“Ellie…” 

“You fucked Joel!” 

“We need to have another conversation about the fact that what happens between my legs is none of your business,” you muttered, turning her around to head back toward the stable. 

“No we don’t,” she said. “This is great, you two have been so depressing the last few months…” 

“We have not!” 

“Please,” she rolled her eyes. “You were basically dead for weeks and Joel barely left the house for who knows how long.” 

“That… was less recent,” you said. “And it’s not your job to worry about us so let’s just…” you stopped just short of the stable doors. “How did you know?” 

“Know what?” 

“About…” you lowered your voice. “Joel. Not that I’m admitting to anything.” 

She smirked. 

“That coat’s been hanging in his front closet since you left.” You looked down at yourself and groaned. Her cocky smile grew. “You wanted the coat again. Bingo.” 

“Well just… keep it to yourself, alright?” You said, heading for the door. “I have no idea how to handle this with Savvy yet so cool it for bit. Please.” 

“I can keep my mouth shut you know,” she said as you opened the door to the stable and she went in. She opened her mouth to keep talking but Dina came up to her, smiling, and she froze instead. 

“Hey Ellie,” she smiled a little bigger before looking at you. “Bambi, good to see you.” 

“You too,” you said, clapping Ellie on the shoulder. “Have fun out there.” 

She glared at you over Dina’s shoulder and you just shrugged and winked at her before taking care of the final things you needed to before getting everyone out the door on patrol. 

You seriously considered, for a moment, taking Joel’s hand and just dragging him back home when he told you that you’d be going out separately. Things with him were so raw and delicate and new again. Neglecting it for two days felt dangerous somehow, a tension setting into your limbs before you and Julie headed out. 

You were always last to leave the stables, always waiting until you knew the rest of the patrol was situated even though you knew Olivia could handle things just fine without you. She smiled - a vaguely amused look on her face - as you went back over everything for the third time. 

“I promise, it’s all good,” she said eventually. “Please go focus on killing infected and staying safe and leave managing the horses to me.” 

On the way out of town, you stopped by where the working dogs were kept and asked if you could bring Gatling along, Julie looking a little skeptical as the dog jumped on Renaissance and settled between your legs, her head draped over your bicep. 

“Used to ride like this with her all the time,” you said, kissing the top of the dog’s head. Gatling licked her lips once and curved her body into yours as you sat back in the saddle to make sure she had room. “I’ll let her down once we’re good and underway, she’ll keep up. She’s great at spotting infected and I’m guessing she could be a great patrol dog once we get her adjusted to working with more than just me…” 

“She definitely looks like she can hold her own,” Julie said, watching as Gatling started scanning the horizon, her ears perked and listening, ready to jump off your horse and run down any apparent threat. “What kind of dog is she, anyway?” 

“She’s a Belgian Malinois,” you said, giving her a scratch behind the ears. “They were police and military dogs before. She saved my ass from infected more than once and she kept my girl alive when I couldn’t…” You kissed her head again and she turned to lick your cheek before going back to watching for threats. “She’s a good girl.” 

“Good to know I’ve got someone out here who can really watch my back,” Julie teased lightly. “Not sure I trust you to do it…” 

“Why not?” You asked, gaping at her. “I’m a great shot, keep you alive no problem…” 

“You forget I saw you trying to show Ellie and Savvy how to shoot a basketball that one time,” she smiled a cocky smile. “You barely hit the backboard…” 

“OK shooting a basketball is a completely different animal,” you waved her off. “Where it counts, my aim is solid. Saved Tommy once.” 

“Bullshit.” 

“It’s true,” you said, nudging Renaissance a little faster. “Ask Joel…” 

“Joel, hm?” She brought her horse alongside yours. “Things happening there?” 

You tried to hide your smile but felt the edges of your mouth curve up, anyway. 

“Good for you!” Julie said. “Both because you’re my friend and I want you to be happy but also because I like being right and goddammit, if I’m going to get shot down for a man of all people at least it’s a man I was right about.” 

You laughed a little before you remembered you had things weren’t just magically fixed with Joel yet.

“Do me a favor and don’t mention it to anyone?” You said, looking down at Gatling. “I need to tell Savvy…” 

The dog looked up to you at the mention of her name and you gave her a small scratch. 

“Oh, right,” Julie winced a bit. “Yeah, that might be rough.” 

“Yeah,” you sighed heavily. “I need to figure out a way to do this without losing both of them. I can’t do that again, I just… I can’t.” 

“You’ll figure it out,” she said gently. “It will be OK. Just have to believe it, it’ll happen.” 

“I’ll do my best,” you smiled a little at her. “How’s shit with Karen, by the way?” 

“Oh God,” she laughed. “I’m not sure how much I should tell you…” 

The patrol was easy enough until the snow started flying. It was still, the two of you talking, Gatling sometimes running ahead and acting more like a puppy than you remembered her being before, making you smile. It felt like if she could be like this - young and free and more than what survival had made her - so could Savvy. She would get there someday. You could get her back and make her understand once she was ready. 

Once the snow picked up, you and Julie decided to hunker down instead of pressing on to what was meant to be your final spot for the day. Though you were pretty sure you were only an hour or so shy of it if the weather weren’t working against you. 

“OK this is bullshit is what this is,” Julie said as she stomped snow off her boots and shook it out of her hair. You laughed a little as you got a fire going in the fireplace of the old house you’d reached for the night. It was just at the edge of a small subdivision, a spot you’d ridden past before but never spent much time in. The two of you had gotten the horses settled in the garage and Julie had done a quick walk around the immediate area to make sure there were no threats before coming in to settle for the night. “White, fluffy bullshit.” 

“Not getting you in the holiday spirit?” You teased. “Thanksgiving is coming up, Christmas right after that…” 

“Yeah, I’m already counting down until spring,” she said, shucking her coat and joining you by the fire. “I can only live with this for so long.” 

“I kinda like it,” you said as the fire caught the larger log and you watched it start to go up. “I like that seasons actually change here. It definitely made it easier to mark the passage of time when I didn’t have a calendar.” 

“Well I guess when you put it that way,” she sighed dramatically and you laughed. “But now that you’re in Jackson, we’ll keep you straight on the passage of time. The snow can go.” 

Julie had brought a bottle of whiskey from the Bison - “A perk of the job,” she said - and you were reminded of sleepovers when you were in high school when you and your friends would swipe booze from your parents’ liquor cabinets and get drunk around a bonfire. 

“I feel like we’re going to regret this in the morning,” you said, snug in your sleeping bag on the floor as the fire dimmed, head fuzzy and limbs tingling from the alcohol. Gatling’s head rested on your stomach.

“We can just sleep in a bit,” she scoffed and you heard her adjust on the couch. “What are they gonna do, fire us from patrol for running late? Doubt it.”

You laughed a little. 

“Guess there’s not much to contend with out there right now, anyway,” you said, closing your eyes. “Been quiet as hell all day. Doubt it’ll change overnight.” 

“It’d better not,” she said, sounding sleepy. “Better not be more snow, either.” 

You laughed once. 

“Better snow than infected,” you said. “Or raiders.” 

She didn’t respond and the room was quiet for a moment before you heard a soft snore coming from the couch. 

You laughed and then sighed, pulling a hand from the sleeping bag to scratch Gatling behind the ears. She sighed and curled up tighter to you. 

“It’s gonna be different when we go back,” you whispered to her, absently stroking one of her soft ears. “You can still come home with me, though. Maybe sleep with Savvy instead for a bit. I’m sure you miss her.” 

You tried to think about how to tell Savvy about Joel. It would have been a hard conversation under any circumstance, you thought. Not one you’d ever thought you’d need to have when you’d started caring for her. The idea of being with anyone long term then had been so foreign it hadn’t even crossed your mind. After Marisa, you’d given up on that. Just the occasional lover when there was a woman around who was interested as she was passing through had been enough. 

But Jackson was different. Joel was different. You had safety and security in Jackson and you loved Joel in a way you’d never thought you’d find, especially not after spending so long alone. But how could you tell Savvy something that you knew would hurt her? How could you tell her anything at all when she hadn’t spoken to you in weeks? 

“She’s gonna come around, right?” You whispered to Gatling. You felt her lick her lips and sigh against you. You closed your eyes but left your hand on the dog. “I’ll get her to trust me again. I will.” 

When the pounding on the front door woke you up, you were barely even aware you’d been asleep. But it was daylight outside and Gatling was standing near the front door, crouched low and snarling. 

“Wha…” Julie lifted her head, a groggy look on her face. 

“I got it,” you said, head spinning as you shoved your way out of your sleeping bag. “You stay put.”

“Thank fuck,” she groaned, dropping her head back on the couch and draping her arm over her eyes. You laughed and shook your head, going for the door. 

“Gatling.” The dog looked up at you, ready to obey. “Heel.” 

She fell back from the door and went to your leg, still tight against you, as you opened the door. 

“Glad I found you,” Gene, Jesse’s patrol partner said, pushing past you into the house without waiting for an invitation. “It’s a mess out there…” 

“That’s why we stopped here for the night,” you said, leaving the door open and nodding to Gatling, who immediately ran outside to pee. You waited by the door and let her back in, the dog sticking to your side again. 

“We can’t be that late getting out of here,” Julie grumbled, sitting up and pinching the bridge of her nose. “Not that it’s not just a blast to see you, Gene…” 

“We’re missin’ people,” he said, more to you than Julie. 

“What?” You frowned, crossing your arms over your chest, the after effects of the alcohol suddenly fading fast. “What do you mean we’re missing people, who are we missing?” 

“Joel and Tommy,” he said. “They never made it where they were supposed to last night and we can’t find ‘em….” 

“They probably stopped for the night like we did,” Julie waved him off. “Did you not see the weather last night? It was a shit show…” 

“Probably,” Gene nodded. “But they’d have made it there by now and we didn’t see them comin’ back down, either. No sign of ‘em. Ellie and Dina weren’t where they were supposed to be, either, but we at least found a fuckin’ trail for them, sent Jesse on to get them back in one piece…” 

You were already moving to put your boots on, heart pounding, Gatling giving you a small whine. You put a handful of jerky on the ground for her and refilled her water dish before you started packing up your sleeping bag. 

“I’m sure they’re fine…” Julie said, actually sitting up in the sleeping bag now, her legs pulled into her chest and watching you closely. 

“We should split up,” you said, pulling on your coat. “Cover more ground…”  

“Don’t know if that’s smart…” Gene began but you cut him off. 

“I can handle myself,” you said, harsher than you’d really meant to. “I’ve got Gatling, I’ve got my guns, I’ve got my axe. That’s all I had for 20 damn years and I made it just fine then. If you’re worried, you and Julie can stick together but I’m not gonna sit here and talk about how to minimize risk when they’re out there dealing with who knows what…” 

“Bambi,” Julie said gently, getting off the couch and taking you by the shoulders. “It’s OK.” 

“No,” you shook your head. “It’ll be OK when I find him in one piece, then it’ll be OK, I’m not…” 

“Gene and I will go one way,” she cut you off. “You and Gatling go the other. We’ll cover more ground. OK?” 

Gene sighed, looking between the two of you. 

“You got a death wish, don’t make me stop you,” he said gruffly. “Gonna go get my horse some water, we can head out.” 

You watched him go, a nervous energy coursing through your body. 

“Hey,” Julie said, taking your face carefully in her hands and making you look at her. “It is OK. It’s Joel and Tommy. They’re very, very good at this. They’re OK.” 

There was a pinch of tears at the back of your throat that you had to fight to swallow past. She took your hands, giving them a squeeze. 

“I can’t lose him now,” your voice was thick. “I just got him back, I can’t…” 

“I know,” she said softly, a sad smile on her face and you were struck, for a moment, by just how pretty she was. She pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, her lips lingering on your skin for a second, before she pulled back. “We’ll find him. We will.” 

“Thank you,” you nodded and took a deep breath, one tear slipping free, before looking down at your dog who was watching, ready and waiting. 

“Gatling, heel.” 

She moved to be immediately with you and you went to the garage, quickly saddling your horse and mounting up. You called Gatling up and she settled at the front of your saddle, already watching for incoming threats with her ears perked as you set off. 

You pushed Renaissance harder than you should have through the deep snow, trying to reach some part of Joel and Tommy’s patrol path so you could find some sense of where they might have gone. 

It wasn’t long before you found the path cut by a group of infected. A large one, judging by the footprints in the snow. You didn’t see a sign of Joel or Tommy but the swath of disturbed snow and brush from the hoard as so thorough you doubted you’d be able to tell if two horses had come that way, too. And, knowing Tommy and Joel, they’d have tracked the infected…

You looked higher for a moment, above where people would disturb branches and realized some branches on trees were clean of snow - too high for a person to bump on their own but just the height a tall man on horseback would hit. 

“Goddammit,” you muttered, steering Renaissance in that direction and pushing her on. 

The horse was breathing hard and heavy when you reached a mansion outside the normal patrol area, fully gated with piles of dead infected outside. You looked through your binoculars and saw tracks from the horses leading inside. But something about it set you on edge. Something wasn’t right. 

You commanded Gatling down and tied Renaissance to a tree that provided at least some shelter. 

“Back soon,” you said quietly, giving her a scratch and offering her an apple from your pack. You made sure your weapons were loaded, rifle at the ready, handgun and knife at your hip, axe across your back. Gatling looked at you, licking her lips once, waiting for a command. 

“Gatling, heel,” you said. “Hunt.” 

She latched onto your side like glue, crouched lower and keeping her mouth closed and you moved as quickly as you could for the gates of the mansion. 

There was no one guarding the place that you could see but you closed the gate behind you. If that had been enough to keep infected out before, you weren’t about to argue with it now. There were signs of plenty of people here, footprints of various sizes all heading for shelter inside. You tried not to think about the fact that you might have to torture information out of someone who left those footprints. If they had taken Joel and Tommy’s horses, you’d have to work quick to find what they knew so you could get to them. Torture could be the best option and, if it meant saving their lives, it was a price you were happy to pay. Because they had to still be alive, they had to be. 

The mansion was dark and almost eerily still. It reminded you of some of the places you’d visited when dropping of horses you’d trained to be trail animals for rich assholes before the outbreak, the trappings of extreme wealth couched in some idyllic, fictional version of the wild west. People who in places like this couldn’t handle the real thing. Real wildness would chew them up and spit them out. 

You crept through the house, looking for some sign of people, too afraid to call for Joel and Tommy and potentially bring down who knows how many people on you when you heard it, an agonized cry in a voice you knew, one you knew better than almost anyone else. 

“Joel,” you breathed, and you were running, Gatling at your heels. 

You knew that you should stop, assess, try to form a plan but he screamed again and you plowed ahead. A plan didn’t matter, all that mattered was one thing: getting to Joel. 

You had to get to him. 

He had to be OK. 

He had to be. 

*** 

Joel knew what it was like to die. 

He’d come close enough enough times over the years. Even before the apocalypse began he had a few near shaves. A fall off a ladder at a job site and the thought of “this is it” as he crashed down, the contemplation of what would happen with his daughter if he was gone, if he’d done enough to make it that she would be OK. A car accident that knocked him out and disoriented him enough that, for a moment in the hospital, he thought he was dead. 

The times since had been different, more acute. For a while, it felt like dying would have been a mercy. There was some innate biology that kept his body pushing to survive when his mind saw death as a welcome outcome when he got stabbed or shot when he was taking what he needed to survive or getting the shit kicked out of him when he got overrun smuggling. 

This, though, was something else. He didn’t want to die anymore, not really. He had you and Ellie and even Savvy. He had a reason to live now - live, not just survive - and he wanted it, wanted that life that was hanging there, so tantalizingly close on the horizon as heat of his blood pooled around him. 

He still wasn’t entirely sure what happened, how he’d ended up here like this. He’d reached the girl he’d seen through the binoculars as she damn near got bit, he’d shot the infected and pulled her up just as its teeth were getting close to her neck. 

“We gotta move!” Tommy yelled, shooting another infected. 

Joel gave the girl a once over as quick as he could. 

“You bit?” He asked. She was panting for breath but shook her head. “Got a gun?” She nodded. “Good, let’s go.” 

He tucked her behind him and led the way, trying to find a way through and out. There were dozens of infected, riled up and searching for something to sink their teeth into, desperate for someone to turn. 

“Shouldn’t be this damn many!” Tommy yelled as they scrambled back toward the horses. “Why are there this damn many?” 

“Worry about that later!” Joel snapped, dragging the girl along behind him. She stopped and shot two that were getting too close for comfort and, even in that moment, Joel could appreciate that she was a good shot. “We have to get the fuck away from here, try and lose ‘em…” 

“Think we can get all the way back to town?” Tommy asked, reloading his gun. 

“Hell no,” Joel shook his head. “Need to find somewhere else to hole up…” 

“My friends,” the girl said, looking between the two of them. “We’ve been staying at a mansion, not far from here. It’s got a fence around it, we’ve got the perimeter secure, if we can get there we’ll have help…” 

Joel and Tommy looked at each other. It was unlikely a girl this young would be running with raiders, more likely a group just passing through as they headed for the coast from a QZ. Tommy shrugged and Joel looked back to her. 

“Right,” he said. “We’ll head there, we got horses outside, you can ride with me and just tell us where to go. I’m Joel, that’s my brother Tommy, we’re from a settlement a few hours from here…” 

“Joel,” she said, something shifting in her eyes when she said it. 

“Right,” Joel said, not paying much attention. That seemed stupid, now. But he’d been so worried about Ellie, about you, about getting out of there to make sure you both were OK. “What’s your name, kiddo?” 

“Abby,” she said, an odd twinge in her voice. “My… I’m Abby.” 

They made it to the horses by the skin of their damn teeth, infected at their heels the whole way. 

The kid was right, at least. The mansion was secure, her friends clearing the area with molotov cocktails, infected burning just outside the gates. 

“Jesus Christ that was close,” Tommy laughed, clapping Joel on the shoulder. “Fuck, ain’t come that close in a while…” 

“Couldn’t get a good look at ‘em,” Joel said, looking back at the burning bodies. “See any bullet holes? Any sign they might have run into the girls?” 

Tommy’s giddy smile over surviving faded and he gave Joel’s shoulder a squeeze. 

“I’m sure they’re alright, Joel,” he said. “Shit, Bambi’s a deadeye. And you taught Ellie everything you know. They probably didn’t even come across these fuckers and if they did, they’re fine. They’re fine, both have made it through worse than a few infected…” 

“We should get inside,” Abby said, looking more at one of her friends than at Joel. “Now.” 

Things seemed normal then. Tommy was trying to get the group to come back to Jackson, Joel was worrying about you and Ellie. 

And then they introduced themselves to the group and it shifted. Just like it had with Abby, the change sudden and sharp. 

“Y’all act like you’ve heard of us or somethin’,” Joel said, thinking it was a joke. His mind was still elsewhere, still on you, still on Ellie, still on making sure you both were OK. He wanted to be back in Jackson, back in his quiet house, back in bed with you, pillows actually brought up from the living room and you close enough that he could trace little patterns over your soft skin. 

“Because they have.” 

He didn’t even see the shot coming, didn’t have a chance to warn Tommy to run, his brother on the ground - unconscious? Dead? He wasn’t sure - before he could even think. Joel screamed as the bullet tore through his leg and he went down, straining to get to Tommy through the pain but they swarmed him, these kids his brother had just been trying to talk into coming back to Jackson. They held him down, his back to a wall as Abby knelt in front of him, her face twisted into a snarl. She looked so different than she had when he’d first spotted her, alone and afraid and cornered the way he was now. 

“Joel Miller,” her teeth were gritted, the rifle tight in her grip. 

“Who are you?” He managed, pulling against the people at his arms, people who looked like kids, fucking kids. 

“Guess.” 

“Look,” he grunted and gave his arms a yank but they thrust him back against the glass. “Don’t know what I did to ya but I know I didn’t do it on purpose. Done a lot of shit in my time but I don’t hurt kids and you’re a bunch of kids…” 

“You kill my dad on purpose?” She pressed the barrel of the gun to his chin. “You slaughter a whole hospital of people who were just trying to save humanity on purpose?”

Joel’s stomach dropped. Of course. Of course saving Ellie would come back for him. Of course now that he finally had a life that was worth living it was getting ripped away for the one thing he couldn’t regret. 

“I did what I had to do,” he said, trying to free himself again, even though he knew it was futile. “But it was just me. Do what you need to do, make whatever speech you got saved up, but leave my brother out of it.” 

She squared her jaw, a look of disgust on her face as she got to her feet. She shoved her gun into the hands of the man - barely a man, almost still a boy, Joel thought - beside her. 

“Tourniquet his leg,” she snapped. The others looked around, hesitating. “Do it!” 

She stalked off as another girl obeyed, Joel trying not to scream through the pain as she tightened the belt around his leg. His head was still spinning when she came back into view, a golf club in her hands. 

“You don’t get to ask me for a damn thing,” she looked at him with so much rage, so much hate that, for a moment, he pitied her. That someone so young was so angry and in so much pain, that her father had cast his lot in with a bunch of child killers and paid with his life, leaving her alone, was tragic. “And you don’t get to rush this.” 

She jerked her head toward the people holding him in place and they looked at each other for a moment before stepping back. He tried to move but his leg was fucking useless and Abby swung the club, catching him in the arm before she forced him all the way to the floor with a pained cry. 

He wasn’t sure how long he’d been here now. Consciousness was hazy. So was the feeling in his limbs. At times, it was like he was floating, far outside his body and somewhere far softer and warmer and kinder than here. Part of him was back in his living room, almost a year ago now, on Christmas Eve when it was just you and him and he buried himself inside the hot clutch of your body by the glow of the holiday lights. He was lost in the feel of you, so soft and warm below him. He wasn’t sure he’d ever felt closer to another person in his life, lacing his fingers with yours and looking into your eyes as you came. He’d promised to take care of you then and he’d meant it, he’d meant it so far beyond that moment inside of you, he’d meant it for the rest of his life he’d take care of you. 

He just hadn’t thought it would be so soon. 

At least, he thought, he’d made things right with you. At least he’d gotten to tell you that he loved you again, at least he wasn’t dying wondering if you could ever have forgiven him. At least things were right with Ellie, at least she’d loved him again and she’d let him love her the way she deserved to be loved. At least she had you and Savvy now, people who would love her that way, too, and make sure she was OK. She was going to need someone to make sure she was OK when he was gone, she was so stubborn and she tried to be so much stronger than she needed to be. She needed someone. So did you. 

At least he’d get to be with Sarah again. She was so much closer now than she’d been before, barely out of reach now, somewhere quiet and safe and peaceful. Just far enough away that what was happening now couldn’t reach her. At least she wasn’t seeing this. At least you and Ellie weren’t seeing this.

Something shifted in the room, the club not landing on Joel’s body again, chaos drawing him back into his body again. 

Everything hurt, like he’d been put through a meat grinder. He wasn’t sure he’d ever hurt this much, at least not physically. Every breath was pain. He’d been lying here long enough that some of the blood pooling around his legs had gone cold. 

There was a vicious snarl, the crack of a gunshot and he realized, suddenly, what happened. 

“Gatling!” He could barely adjust his head enough to see where you were. Your rifle was on the ground but so was the only other gun Joel remembered seeing in the room. Your axe was tight in your hands as you threw one of the men back with a roar. You kicked the guns at your feet behind you and pointed to Joel and snapped your fingers. “Guard!” 

The dog ran to him and crouched around his body, hunched low, snarling and barking. You screamed and Joel struggled to see what was happening, tried to get up but he was only able to make it a few inches off the ground before he collapsed back down, his body too broken to properly obey. You were so close, you were in trouble and he tried to focus on it. He had to get you out of here, he had to take care of you, he’d promised to take care of you. He was supposed to protect you, that’s what he was built to do and he was failing. 

“Gatling, bite!” Your command was more of a shriek, sharp and fearful.

The dog shot away from him for a moment, a snarl followed by a pained wail and Joel could see enough to make out that the animal had tackled someone near you as you scrambled to your feet, more of them coming for you. Joel tried again to move but his injured leg gave out that time, collapsing below him before he could put even half his weight on it. 

“Gatling, release!” The screaming stopped and he heard another snap. “Guard!” 

The dog went back to him, snarling and snapping and 

“Bambi!” 

Joel turned his head too quick to the door, his neck screaming in pain, to see Ellie standing there, her eyes wide.

“Ellie!” He yelled through gritted teeth. 

“Go!” You screamed at her, bringing your axe around, swinging wide on another person coming for you, just catching their arm. “Get help, get Jesse! Go!” 

You circled toward the door, axe up, daring any of them to try to follow her. 

“You’re not a part of this!” Abby prowled toward you. “Don’t make me kill you, too.” 

“He’s a part of this so I am, too,” you panted. “If you wanna try and kill me, you better do it quick and you better be damn sure you do it right because the second I’m down, that dog will rip your throats out one by fucking one. She’s done it before, I’ve seen it. You’ll have to kill me - which she won’t take lyin’ down - and get to the guns behind me to take her down. She works quick, hell of a lot quicker than me. If you’re fightin’ both of us, you don’t stand a chance. You that confident? I am. So is she.” 

Gatling snarled as if on cue. 

“Other option is to get the fuck out of here,” you said. Joel could just see you around the dog, blood dripping from your side, lip split open. “We got backup comin’, we’re from a settlement of hundreds and we’ve fought off raiders and infected for fuckin’ years, think we can handle a band of fucking children without much trouble. This worth dyin’ for? Right now, I got your death warrant. Up to you if I sign it.” 

“Abby,” one of the men said. “Let’s go.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” She snapped. “You want to just go? Now? Let him live?” 

Gatling snarled again. 

“You’re runnin’ short on time!” You growled, teeth clenched tight. “Now or never!” 

“You lost control of the situation,” the man hissed. “We’re not all dying for your fucking revenge mission.” 

She turned toward Joel and he watched the hatred and the rage move through her. He watched her think about bringing the club down one more time, just to see if she could land a final, killing blow before the dog struck hers. She moved a fraction of an inch toward him and Gatling adjusted, a vicious bark and a snarl ripping from her. 

“He wouldn’t want you to die for this,” the man said quietly, so low Joel doubted you could hear. “And Miller probably won’t survive this, anyway. It’s done. Let’s go.” 

“Fine,” she bit out, throwing the club aside. Joel tried his best to follow her with his eyes, praying that she wouldn’t go for you. Once the people had moved away from him toward you and the door, you called Gatling to you, the dog standing between you and the aggressors, snarling and threatening. They left, watching you closely, without a word.

The door closed and you dropped the axe, grabbing a gun from behind you on the ground and limping for Joel, blood dripping down your leg. 

“Joel,” you fell to your knees beside him. He tried to say something but all that left him was a pained moan. “You’re OK, I’ve got you, you’re alright…” 

“Tommy,” he managed, panting for breath. “Check… Tommy….” 

“OK,” you said softly, brushing his hair back from his forehead. “Gatling, guard.” 

You snapped your fingers and pointed to Joel again. The dog obediently came and positioned herself between him and the door, body like a coiled spring ready to attack. You went to Tommy and checked his pulse before adjusting him. Joel heard him groan and you said something he couldn’t quite make out before you were back to him, a bag with you this time. 

“They’ve gotta have something in here,” you said, ripping through the contents. 

“Baby…” 

“Tommy’s alright,” you said, glancing at Joel before going back to the bag. “He’s comin’ around. Ellie will be back soon, she’s bringing help, it’s going to be OK Joel, it is…” 

“Baby.” 

“Hush.” 

You found what you were looking for, a bag with some medical stuff inside. You set it nearby and looked over Joel’s back, wincing as you did. 

“Need to look at the front of you, too,” you said. “I’m going to roll you over, alright?” 

“Baby…” 

“Shut up, Joel.” 

Your hands shook and he cried out in pain as you moved him onto his back, flinching when you saw his leg.

“Jesus,” you whispered. “What’d they do to you?” 

“Baby,” he said again, managing to lift a hand enough to almost reach your face. You took it, gently guiding his bloody palm the rest of the way to your cheek as you leaned down into it. “You’re bleedin’.” 

“Oh,” you looked down at yourself. “It’s fine, I’ll be fine…” 

“Need to take care,” he had to stop for a second, grinding his teeth through the pain as it wracked his body. It took him a moment to catch his breath. “Care of yourself. I’m… I can’t make it back, not like this…” 

“Shut up, Joel.” 

“Promised to protect you,” he said, brushing his thumb over your cheekbone. “Lemme do it.” 

“Protect me later,” you said, setting his hand down and ripping the bag of medical gear open with your teeth. “Going to put bandages on your leg, see if we can let the tourniquet off, save the leg…” 

“Baby.”

“Shut UP, Joel!” 

He watched you work for a moment and you felt farther and farther away with every breath. He could feel himself fading and he wished you’d just stop, that you’d take care of yourself and just hold him while he could still feel you. 

“Need you to look after Ellie,” he said as you wound bandages around his thigh. “She’s gonna act like she doesn’t need anyone but she does and…”

“And she has you,” you cut him off with a glare. “So it doesn’t matter.” 

You released the tourniquet on his leg and it was more of a relief than he’d expected it to be, the pain of it fading to a dull enough roar that he’d forgotten it was there until the weight of it was lifted. 

“Gotta get this spot at your side, too…” you adjusted his shirt and leaned over him and he got a better look at your own side, a bright red splotch growing on your shirt, a long gash going from your ribs down toward your stomach. 

“You’re bleedin’, sweetheart.” 

“I know,” you said. “Getting you fixed up first…” 

“Baby.” 

“Joel, I swear…” 

“Need to get you and Tommy back,” he needed to stop for a second to catch his breath, the rise and fall of his chest straining his ribs. “Can’t… can’t die knowin’…” 

“You’re not dying here,” you snapped, your voice thick. “I just got you back, you’re not dying here, you’re coming home and you’re going to be OK and…” 

You sat back, looking at the spot on his side that you’d just bandaged, wiping your nose on the back of your wrist as you did. 

“Gotta take care of yours now,” he said, eyes tracing the spot at your side. But you shook your head. 

“Outta gauze.” 

“Baby…” 

“It’s not that bad,” you sniffed. “I’ll just… hold pressure until Ellie gets back. It’s OK, you’re gonna be OK, I can’t….” 

“Here,” he ground his teeth, breathing through another wave of pain. “Lay… lay with me. Cut side up, keep the blood from flowin’ too easy.” 

You looked at him for a moment before nodding and lying delicately next to him. He adjusted as best he could so he could see you, touch you. You’d been hit in the face at least twice, one of your eyes swelling shut and your lip split open. But you were still beautiful, so damn beautiful. 

“I’m so sorry baby,” he said softly. 

“Joel…” 

“Wanted… wanted so much more time with you and the girls,” he said quietly. Your skin was soft, so soft it seemed like the sensation of it might be the only thing holding him to the earth. “I’m so sorry we’re not gettin’ that…” 

“Stop talking like that,” you were crying now, not making any attempt to stop it. 

“It’ll be OK sweetheart,” he said. “You’ll… you’ll be alright. Ellie’s gonna need you, keep an eye on her for me. Keep her outta trouble. Savvy, too. She loves you… she’ll… she’ll come around…” 

“Joel,” you whispered, reaching out to cup his face, your fingers in his curls, one of the only places on his body he wasn’t bleeding. 

“I’m so happy we made things right,” he said, his eyes searching yours. He wondered, if he watched you closely enough, if he could bring the precise color of them with him wherever he was going. “I love you so damn much, sweetheart. Need you to know that, OK? I love you.” 

“I love you too,” you breathed. Your skin was so soft and your breath was warm on his skin. “I love you. I love you.” 

You said it again and again. It was the last thing Joel heard before he passed out. 

Next Chapter

A/N: Hi y'all ❤��

Again, begging for you to trust me, OK? OK.

I do love you but... feel free to yell at me in the comments or in my asks or DMs. I'll be responding to asks about the last chapter soon now that this one is up.

Thanks for going on this crazy ride with me!! It truly means the world.

Taglist: @ashleymsnodgrass@planet-marz1@kalea-bane @juneswonderlust@ilovepedro @h-annahayy @starstruckmusiciansartghost@beccerjune@mumma-moonchild@netonetoneto@mellymbee@purplelye@n7cje@flugazi@evyiione@randomhoex@aliengirl99@orcasoul@reds-ramblings@pedropascalsbbg @fupoola @tinypotatothing @knopes-waffles @lilmizmoz @ayamenimthiriel@jenispunk@panda-pascal@sarap-77@flugazi@your-slutty-gf@daniegraceg@partyofone3413@cumberpegg@noisynightmarepoetry.@fifia-writes@grumpygrumperton @srmacaroni @txlady37 @bigboiseason123@ashleyfilm

[missingpolinseason]

As a huge Penelope fan who's also an absolutely fangirl of Julia Quinn's work and most of all Romancing Mister Bridgerton, watch Pen compete with Cressida for a suitor AND be completely alone while her best friend/sister/soulmate befriends a version of Cressida the show tryed to redime broke my heart.

It seemed unfair to Penelope as a character and a terrible decision. Almost as if the writers didn't respect Pen nor couldn't at lest try to understand how she'd feel, how society and her family treated her. And it made it even worst when I realised how much the actor who plays - very well, this is not a critic to her tallent nor her as a person -, Jessics Madisen, looks so much with new showrunner Jess Brownell.

So, for 2 seasons we had the mean girl Cressida from Julia's books. The one who gossip's about other debutantes, throw her drink at Pen's (sort of) favorite dress, would have told society about Daphmon's garden enconter. But sudenly, in Polin's season, she is misunderstood and only acts the way she does because of her home/family situation, as if the script is justifing and making escuses from her behavior.

There's even a new mean girl character named Lady Clara Livingston, who is the one who tells society about Colin helping Pen to find a husband so Cressida doesn't have to do it. (When it would've been so logical for Cressida's character to do it, but they wanted to develope her friendship with El).

There's also the case of Polin's engagement party. While in the book Colin invites her so "she can watch Pen's sucess", in the show she invites herself AND claims to be Lady Whistledown - wich in the book she does in a random ball - while no one questions it. Cressida even gets her own cover song moment when she enters the Mondrich's ball. Yess, 'Confident' was there for Cressida.

I can tell you who picks the songs and when they're gonna play - I believe some times they may be picked by the director - but Brownell told in an interview she was the one to choose "Give Me Everything (Tonight)" and that it Pittbull made the carriage scene so there's that.

In the end, not only Cressida got her sort of rediming arc but also her mother got to be the "fake Whistledown" - a total show plot since in the books no one ever attempts to write it. And they give her yet another change by making Colin try to dissuade her of her blackmail instead of embarass in front of the whole ton by revealing his wife is the real and only Whistledown. Yeah, the writing made Colin, the lead man, fail in help his wife to favor Cressida. It was so bad some fans actually believe she's be Sophie, wich we'll never known since season 4 scripits were most likely revisited in between filming but her mother (the fake Whistledown) was named Araminta.

We also know that scene in wich Colin talks to Cressida was reshot because of the wig.

[jules-has-notes]

Aca Top 10: Sitcom Themes — VoicePlay music video

Since the emergence of TV sitcoms in the mid-20th century, part of their enduring charm has been the catchy songs that accompany the opening credits. There's something reassuring about a familiar tune that indicates whatever problems the quippy characters might face will be resolved in less than 30 minutes, and probably end with a hug. While VoicePlay can't provide a physical embrace for every listener, this medley is just as fun and entertaining as an episode of your favorite comfort show in a fraction of the time.

Details:

title: Aca Top 10 – Sitcom Themes

original songs / performers: "I'll Be There For You" by The Rembrandts from Friends; [0:20] Saved by the Bell theme by Michael Damian; [0:36] "Hey Beautiful" by The Solids for How I Met Your Mother; [0:45] The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme by DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince; [1:05] Seinfeld theme by Jonathan Wolff; [1:18] "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" by Gary Portnoy from Cheers; [1:45] "As Days Go By" by Jesse Frederick for Family Matters; [2:08] "Thank You for Being a Friend" by Cynthia Fee for Golden Girls; [2:30] Mister Ed theme by Jay Livingston; [2:45] Unbreakable Kimmy Shmidt theme by The Gregory Brothers; [2:54] "Movin’ On Up" by Ja'Net DuBois for The Jeffersons

written by: "I'll Be There For You" by Michael Skloff, David Crane, Marta Kauffman, Allee Willis, Phil Sōlem, & Danny Wilde; Saved by the Bell theme by Scott Gale; "Hey Beautiful" by Carter Bays, Craig Thomas, Patrick Butler, & C.C. DePhil; The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air theme by Jeffrey "DJ Jazzy Jeff" Townes & Will "The Fresh Prince" Smith; Seinfeld theme by Jonathan Wolff; "Where Everybody Knows Your Name" by Gary Portnoy & Judy Hart-Angelo; "As Days Go By" by Jesse Frederick & Bennett Salvay; "Thank You for Being a Friend" by Andrew Gold; "Mister Ed" by Jay Livingston & Ray Evans; Unbreakable Kimmy Shmidt theme by Jeff Richmond, Michael Gregory, & Evan Gregory; "Movin’ On Up" by Ja'Net DuBois

arranged by: Layne Stein & Earl Elkins Jr.

release date: 19 July 2019

My favorite bits:

that iconic twangy air guitar and the requisite 👏👏👏👏

the fantastic bus "vroom" that was honed through years of "Road Trip" performances 🚌💨

Eli and Earl's squicked out reaction to Geoff's deep "moist" 💧

the light, popping percussion Layne gives to to "Fresh Prince"

Geoff's descending run in the transition into "Seinfeld"

Earl pretending he's going to smack Eli while he's helping with the "Seinfeld" percussion

that lovely four-part harmony for ♫ "get awaaay" ♫

J.None's quick transformation into a pitch-perfect Steve Urkel 🤓

their absolutely joyful tone as they sing the Golden Girls theme

the back row mounting pretend horses during Mr. Ed

animated carrot shenanigans 🥕

Geoff grooving away on that walking bass line in "Movin’ On Up"

Eli and J's gospel hands on that final "oooh!" harmony

Earl's fantastic belt for the end of "Movin’ On Up"

how long they manage to hold on to the ending silence before they burst out laughing

Trivia:

○ Once again, the decision process for this entry in their "Aca Top 10" series was quite contentious. The guys are clearly very passionate about their entertainment preferences.

○ Some of the shows are represented on their shirts, regardless of whether they made the final cut.

Eli — Gilligan from Gilligan's Island (1964–67)

Earl — portraits of the Golden Girls (1985–92) with "squad" above

J.None — Fresh Prince of Bel Air (1990–96) title graphic baseball jersey

Geoff — Joey Tribiani's catchphrase "How you doin'?" from Friends (1994–2004) in the show's title font

Layne — Kelly Kapowski from Saved By the Bell (1989–92)

○ The guys had already recorded a version of "Everywhere You Look" from Full House (1987–95) and Fuller House (2016–20) as the second entry in their PartWork series three years earlier. Earl and Layne covered all five vocal parts for that one.

○ Revisiting some of the memorable shows of their youth got Earl and Layne in a bit of a nostalgic mood, so they gave a shoutout to a favorite after-school snack on social media.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by VoicePlay (@thevoiceplay)

[agent-oo-z]

HAPPY WORLD AFRICAN PAINTED DOG DAY!!!!!!

For those who don’t know me, I’m autistic and my main/biggest/central special interest is African painted dogs! So today(August 26th) I’m gonna make a little informational post about my favorite creature on our planet.

Unless otherwise specified, all pictures/videos are my own!

GENERAL CONTENT WARNING:

This post contains images of carcass feedings. This means there will be photos of animal carcasses in various stages of being consumed. If seeing this type of thing will upset you, do not click on the read more!

To start off(and to make sure anyone who accidentally clicked the read more has a chance to leave before the carcass feedings) here’s my collection of African painted dog plushes!

First up is the group photo, then the individual photos. The name of each plush will be listed above the corresponding individual photo.

Cantillë(which is a very rough translation of four toes based on I think DND 5e elvish) is the only plush NOT named after a painted dog who lives/has lived at the Denver Zoo Conservation Alliance.

Jesse!

Tilly!

Cheza!

Cholula!

Teddy(AKA Theodore Roosevelt)!

Livingstone!

Nigel!

Nigel in particular is super interesting. The real life Nigel only has three legs! He was born with severe hip dysplasia and actually had to undergo an amputation surgery when he was younger as the impacted leg was causing health issues. But his pack mates treat him extremely well and actively look out for his well-being!

This isn’t just because they live in human care either. African painted dogs are one of the few species of predatory mammals that intentionally care for sick, injured, elderly, and/or disabled pack members rather than chasing them away or letting them die off. There are even examples of three legged painted dogs in the wild remaining pack leaders after their injuries!

Painted dogs are also one of the most successful mammalian land predators out there, with their advanced communication and pack hunting techniques leading to an average 80% success rate. Compare that to another African predator, the lion, which has about a 30% success rate!

Painted dogs are often characterized as vicious and cruel because they begin to consume their prey as soon as possible, which can mean the prey animal is still alive. One possible reason for this behavior is that painted dogs often have their prey stolen by other carnivores(lions, hyenas, etc).

African painted dogs also participate in social regurgitation! This means that pack members will regurgitate food to share with each other as a form of bonding.

They are the only extant(opposite of extinct) member of the genus Lycaon!

Painted dogs are crepuscular, meaning they’re most active at dawn and dusk.

[jerzwriter]

Meet my OC: Jessica Phillips

I'd like to introduce you to Jessica Phillips. I've introduced her in a couple fanfics and edits in the past, but I am putting the finishing touches on some WIPs and wanted to flesh her character out a bit.

Book: Open Heart. (Prequel - when Casey is in Med School)

LI: Casey MacTavish (OH F!MC)

Face Claim: Madelaine Petsch

Age: 23 (meets Casey)/24 (starts dating)/33 (2023)

Hometown: Lakewood, Colorado

Family: James and Rebecca Phillips. Her father is a pastor and a bank manager, and her mother is a part-time librarian. She is the youngest of three. Her sister, Bethany, is six years older, and her brother, Troy, is two years older.

College: Temple University, Philadelphia, PA BS - Biology

Med School: UPenn - Perelman School of Medicine

Occupation: Pediatric Cardiologist

General Information: Jessica grew up in a happy but conservative family. She knew she was a lesbian from the time she was in middle school, but never let anyone know because she felt she would be disowned. When the time came to go to college, she only applied to schools in liberal areas where she knew she'd be able to live openly.

She had one serious relationship before Casey. Her name was Ammarah Ryan, and she was a fellow student at Temple University. Ammarah and Jessica applied to many grad schools, but the plan was to remain in Philadelphia if they could. They were both accepted to UPenn, and Jess assumed they were both going there. But Ammarah had been accepted to Oxford, and he told Jess of her plans to attend there just a month before graduation.

She returned to her home state of Colorado for her residency but was not happy. She became an attending in Seattle and eventually in New York City.

Jessica only came out to her family when she was an attending, and they were not accepting. When Jessica married her wife, Audrey Livingston, a pediatric oncologist, her parents would not attend, but her siblings were supportive. Casey had remained friends with Jessica, and she attended her wedding along with her parents, who always treated Jessica like she was their own.

Jessica and Audrey did not have children of their own, choosing to focus on their careers and each other, but they had several furbabies.

For more information about Casey & Jessica's relationship during med school, see here.

Casey x Jessica Masterlist

@choicesficwriterscreations

[thekindergartenclass]

Don't Drop the Ball (Short Film)

An amazing short film about shapeshifting.

Director: The Kindergarten Class

Actors: Jesse Is Heavyweight, Mike Pitchum, Darren Livingston, Samuel Williams II

Voiceover Actors: Splash Wilder, Ice, Parks, Adam 22

Screenwriter: Jesse Is Heavyweight

Cinematographer: Swami

Art Direction: The Kindergarten Class

Colorist: The Kindergarten Class

Graphic Art: Positronics Dept

Editor: The Kindergarten Class

Music: courtesy of Heavyweight Unlimited

Producer: Ryan K. Smith

Executive Producer: Alon

Distributor: Apple Music

Runtime: 4:57, Rated PG - 13, Sci Fi

[sunnydaleherald]

The Sunnydale Herald Newsletter, Saturday, October 14th

CORDELIA: I feel a little guilty. ANGEL: Don't. - I mean, nineteen dollars for a - sashimi couscous appetizer is money well spent. How was it anyway? Pretty good? I mean, it ought to be pretty... CORDELIA: It's delicious but that's not what I feel guilty about. ANGEL: Oh. (Sees Wesley looking at him) I'm not cheap, I-I'm just old. (Slipping into a slight Irish accent) I-I remember when a few bob got you a good meal, a bottle *and* a tavern wench. - You were saying?

~~Belonging~~

[Drabbles & Short Fiction]

Warm Me Up (It's Cold Inside) by Rivana (Xander/Devon, E)

Friday the 13th at the Farmer's Market by watcherless (Buffy/Faith, T)

Before the Break of Dawn by AidenFlame (Dawn, T)

Untitled by blue-moon21 (Darla & Drusilla, not rated)

After by MillennialCryBaby (Buffy/Spike, R)

[Chaptered Fiction]

Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Shadowed Suspicion, Chapter 396 by madimpossibledreamer (Ensemble, Jojo's Bizarre Adventure crossover, T)

Fate Plans and We Laugh, Chapter 18 by Hermione2be (Dawn/Bruce Wayne, multiple crossovers, T)

Charming Sunnydale, Chapter 21 by QuillBard (Buffy/Faith, M)

House of Slayer: The Slayer, The Witch, & The Key, Chapter 16 by BrennaLynn (Buffy & Dawn, Harry Potter crossover, T)

You Are Worth Saving, Chapter 9 by Kittenwritings (Spike/Fred, Cordelia/Wesley, Buffy/Faith, M)

To Be Hers, Chapter 16 by faefawn (Buffy/Spike, not rated)

Her Old Fashioned Boy, Chapter 8 by Bobbie23 (Giles/Jenny, T)

We Don't Know What's Around the Corner, Chapter 6 by the_widow_twankey (Angel/Spike, M)

Lavender Haze, Chapter 5 by Sera (Buffy/Jax Teller, Sons of Anarchy crossover, M)

Kinktober 2023, Chapter 14 by Skyson (Buffy/Giles, E)

Narnia: Interlude, Chapter 4 by BrennaLynn (Buffy/Faith, Chronicles of Narnia crossover, T)

Chosen One 2: Welcome to the Hellmouth, Chapter 8 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, R)

A Marriage of Inconvenience, Chapter 16 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, R)

Dead End Plots, Chapter 5 by Melme1325 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Surviving Together, Chapter 4 by ionlylikebadboys (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only)

Where Clocks Don't Tick, Chapter 2 by Willow91 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Back to the Light, Chapter 4 by MountainKing (Buffy, Torchwood/Doctor Who crossover, FR18)

A Place in the Sun, Chapter 32 by honeygirl51885 (Buffy/Spike, NC-17)

Chosen One 2: Welcome to the Hellmouth, Chapter 8 by all_choseny (Buffy/Spike, R)

What the Drabble? Chapter 26 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, R)

Out For A Walk... Bitch, Chapter 3 by MaggieLaFey (Buffy/Spike, Adult Only)

Autumnal Shorts, Chapter 14 by VeroNyxK84 (Buffy/Spike, R)

[Images, Audio & Video]

Artwork: domestic Spuffy getting ready by underxstars (worksafe)

Artwork: Buffy and William Pratt by Lia Livingstone (worksafe)

Artwork: Spike in 6.03 After Life by Lia Livingstone (worksafe)

Artwork: J.C Leyendecker inspired Spike portrait by vampyrwaltz (worksafe)

Artwork: Willow by mistyintherivers (worksafe)

Artwork: happy fuck him on the floor friday buffyverse fans by indulgetheother (Angel/Spike, Darla & Drusilla, NOT worksafe)

Artwork: Buffy by Superfandomcorp (worksafe)

Cartoon: Dawn & Buffy by Paul Gadzikowski's The Hero of Three Faces (Fringe crossover, worksafe)

Manip: Spike/Cordelia by pass-the-dyanmite (worksafe)

Gifset: "Iris" by Goo Goo Dolls by andremichaux (Buffy/Spike, worksafe)

Artwork: Buffy card I made for a friend’s birthday! by Lady-of-Letters (worksafe)

Fanvid: Buffy Summers | what was I made for? by Lauren Faulkner

Fanvid: Buffy The Vampire Slayer - Music Montage / Hit me with your best shot Pat Benatar by Johnny Lwrence

Fanvid: Buffy&Angel - All about us by Othania

Fanvid: Buffy & Angel || Wishful Thinking by Alice

Fanvid: Angel After the fall Episode 1 opening by Buffynatural / Smallville Season 11

Video: Angel Season 6 episode 1- After the Fall (Canon comic continuation) by Buffynatural / Smallville Season 11

Fanvid: Wesley Wyndam-Pryce | Buffyverse | Always Dreaming by Jess Wilson

Vidlet: Buffy The Vampire Slayer Season 7 Edit by Buffy The Vampire Slayer

[Reviews & Recaps]

Really enjoyed listening to the “Buffy” Audible series “Slayers”!!! by Buffyfan145

I read the Angel book "Shakedown..." by oveliagirlhaditright

Episodes 10, 11, and 12 “Nightmares”, “Out of Sight, Out of Mind” and “Prophecy Girl” and Season 2 episode 1, “When She Was Bad” by mothmans-wedding-photographer

Thoughts on the audio book...(SPOILERS) by ross1251

Video: The BTVS Twisted Guide S01 S11: Out of Sight Out of Mind by Twisted View

Video: Forever-Slayer Sunday by Jane Talks Buffy

Video: Fred reacts to Angel S2 Ep19 by kawaiiconcept

Video: Fred Reacts to Angel S2 Ep20 by kawaiiconcept

Video: Fred reacts to Angel s2 ep 21 by kawaiiconcept

Video: Fred reacts to Angel s5 ep 22 by kawaiiconcept

[Recs]

Fic rec: Gamble on Destiny by leni (Buffy/Angel, T) by I Will Remember You Marathon

[Fandom Discussions]

We should have had an Oz/Cordelia friendship arc by 5bi5

the entire concept of ben & glory in buffy season 5 is so wild… by imunbreakabledude

Jesse and Cordelia in the “Slayers” verse [spoilers] by oveliagirlhaditright

[Thoughts on a possible sequel of "Slayers"; spoilers] by oveliagirlhaditright

I do wonder what the rest of the gang was up to in Slayers [spoilers] by oveliagirlhaditright

[Love triangles in "Slayers"; spoilers] by oveliagirlhaditright

I just realised Buffy is wearing the cross Angel gave her when she kills him by bluestarsandclouds

Part of the reason why buffy is such a well respected character by Glossyfruitloops

who was the best for willow? by the vampslayerr

Slayers: A Buffyverse Story releases all episodes today - thoughts? continued by multiple posters

Reacting to Reactions! BtVS Season 5 [The Normies reaction to Out of My Mind] by multiple posters

So WTF was with the robot ninja in [AtS] S5? by suikofan80

horny angel annoying [in AtS Season 1] by valiwagg

7x22 - smh [why weren't Anya, Andrew, Xander, Dawn, Giles and Wood outside the high school for the final battle] by Individual-Task-4586

The invisible girl by Tsole96

Buffy’s cheerleading tryout by Manoodless

Something that has always bugged me… [Spike never had a funeral] by AlabasterPuffin

Did the initiative really not know about the Slayer? by danielelington

Why are only some potential Slayers trained before hand? by lovemeonwednesdays

Buffy TV vs. Angel TV by caldude1985

What if buffy never went to the master? by Tsole96

Robin Sachs appreciation thread by kittyflaps

Graham was the unsung hero of The Initiative by dabzandjabz

Why would giles or buffy go to the master at all? by Tsole96

The state of Sunnydale (Slayers) [spoilers] by ChrisWithGlasses

Harmony, a lot like soulless Spike? by WhatName230

Slayers ending! for those who have finished [spoilers] by Andrew_belfast

Just experienced "I will remember you" for the first time... by Sourpatchmoms

One of the worst parts of watching seasons 5 & 6 (haven't seen 7 yet) is how they turned Buffy into a mom by SafiraAshai

Thoughts/Theories on the Audible-Verse (Slayers spoilers) by primal_slayer

Buffy's money problems in season 6 by Groundbreaking_Ad613

Question about Cordy's ascension to higher being by Typical-Owl9521

Video: The Buffy Tag🧛‍♂️🎃 by David's Book Reviews

[Articles, Interviews, and Other News]

Video: 'Slayers: A Buffyverse Story’ Official Trailer by Audible

Submit a link to be included in the newsletter!

Join the editor team :)

[ardenrosegarden]

While the martial exploits of the Capetian kings and Angevin counts may be quite familiar, such operatic drama seems to have been limited to only the highest reaches of aristocratic society. The charters reveal that most noble born couples experienced marriage in the following way: Women married in their late teens to men who were roughly their contemporaries and most marriages lasted until one of the spouses died. At that point, husbands and wives would often remarry. Some marriages were very long lived indeed. William II Gouet and his wife Eustachia were married for about half a century and the marriage of Agnes of Montigny and Odo of Vallières lasted approximately thirty years. Even in those cases where nobles remarried, it was not after a short or expedient alliance, rather it was often after at least a decade of marriage. Mahild of Alluyes was married to her first husband, William I Gouet, for at least fifteen years when he died. She remarried a few years later to Geoffrey of Mayenne and, in spite of allegations of his marital infidelity, they stayed married for over twenty years. This evidence suggests that once married, the lords and ladies of this region tended to stay married. Such long lasting marriages promoted a sense of dedication and commitment, which often resulted in affection and caring. The charters of the region are full of references to beloved spouses, as well as gifts made out of affection or concern for a husband or wife. In his romance of Érec et Énide, Chrétien de Troyes presented marriage as affectionate and between equals. Other literature of this period celebrated love between spouses as well, causing one scholar to remark that “with the possible exception of Perceval’s peculiar solution, all the male heroes are apparently satisfied both with their brides and with the institution of marriage”. The marriage patterns of the aristocracy of the lands of the Loire suggest they felt much the same about their own marital experiences. Unfortunately, this collective experience of marriage has been overshadowed by the dramatic exploits of troubled marriages.

-Amy Livingstone, Climbing the Tree of Jesse : Aristocratic Marriage in the Lands of the Loire, 1050-1150

[minipliny]

For the end of year book asks: 11, 17, 25 please and thank?

11 A book that was most out of your comfort zone

Probably Idol by Louise O'Neill! I don't usually read books that are set right in the present day, or thrillers, or books about social media/the Internet, but I am glad I read it. It's about an Instagram influencer promoting spirituality, self confession, and feminist healing who is herself accused of sexual assault by a childhood friend, so, major content warnings for discussion and depiction of sexual violence. I thought it was quite a compelling take on the kind of parasocial relationships gone wrong of the Internet era and how the idea of the first person confessional tell all can sometimes not be about truth but about crafting a certain type of story. I often wince at stories which are meant to capture ~the zeitgeist~ but this felt like a specific story about a specific situation that stuck its landing rather than like reading an op Ed.

17 Top 5 books of the year

Petina Gappah, out of Darkness, Shining Light which I am instantly and personally recommending to you because it is the story of Dr livingstone's African servants transporting his body to the coast from their perspective and Gappah creates an incredible transformative text and set of characters I'm still thinking about, it 2as brilliant

Piranesi, Susanna Clarke. This was absolutely fantastic, also impossible to pigeonhole into any known genre or situation. It's still swirling around in my mind and i just love how completely perfectly realised and also deeply ambiguous the House is. It's not a metaphor, it just is.

The Shadow King, Maaza Mengiste. Made me cry very hard for the last 100 pages which is hard to do. A proper modern war epic, that somehow summons up all the honour and glory of the characters facing down the Italians with all the terrible ugliness and gendered violence and hierarchies and contradictions of their lives and societies at once.

Afterparties, Anthony Veasna So. A set of short stories set in California in the Cambofian diaspora which contains the most fantastic story about trying to teach Moby Dick in the Bay Area and what Moby Dick even means and what being a professor and being expected to represent anything in writing even means and which is just like layer upon geological layer of meaning as well as really, deeply funny and well observed.

Transcendent Kingdom, Yaa Gyasi. On a lot of people's lists, and I gave in and read it, and it is that good. I love a book about doing neuroscientific experiments on rats with cocaine, and I love about faith without being about faith in any obvious way. But what put this on my top 5 is that there is so much hope in its narrative in the bittersweetness of it, and I felt like I really needed that when I read it.

25 Did you discover any new authors?

Yes! Jess Kidd, The Night Ship, which is an amazing retelling of the Batavia sinking and mutiny which I almost put in my top 5, Petina Gappah whose second book I'm now reading, Margaret Drabble (not new as in now, but new to me) after reading the Seven Sisters, Mavis Gallant whose short stories blew my mind, Elizabeth Strout, Julie Otsuka, Moris Farhi, Darragh Martin....

[devoutpriest]

I think I might buy fried fish and chips at seafood stall, probably before or after I go to coles, soon. With chicken salt, as I like how it tastes. One of the times I went there, I walking there with using TripView, a moment that stuck out to me was I asking for that kind of salt on my chips, and I said it pretty softly, and they were a bit annoyed, yet i then said it louder.

I discovered a lot of new music this year, it blurring a bit in taste the year before / and before that. it is surprising skin of a saint is the first one on my spotif.y wrapp.ed, even though he with the butterfly on his nose was interesting, as it showed up on my app. I thought Livingston would be, as Athelstan era. *shrugs* Oh I love Sebastian Schub so much atm!

i am thankful for the nice reception athelstan received in the vikings community, he means a lot to me. I found him really interesting, I watching Vikings initially because of George Blagden, yet I found his journey interesting, I found his visions and his belief of Christ and Norse interesting.

I am thankful I found the Catholic Youth bible that eluded me in 2015 (when I first wrote him — so, my tangent of memory from living life especially in high school & what I felt from the show & looking at bible verses online), my high school bible that I learned a lot about Jesus.

I liked the bible, when I was in high school, yet okay, I quite hated Religion Class, ironically. -laughs- I liked watching Prince of Egypt in class. For Year 11 & 12, it ended up being life skills for me and Juliette. No HSC for that, just for English, which was gr9. <3 I heard bad stories about HSC, during my time at school, because students are so stressed they.. y’know. there literally is a bridge I walk across to go to school, stretching over the road. Hmm, well, Year 7 - 10 was stressful as it is.

I could understand about The Gospel of St John, and the Letters, in its beautiful papyrus smell in an olden day-esque backing, which I understand Athelstan had at the time, when he was painting at the monastery. So I touched a bit upon what his mind was like with that belief rememberance, as well as when he sub-consciously remembers other excerpts from religiously reading throughout his time living there. And of course, when he is with Ecbert at England.

I am glad I decided to have miles heizer here as a modern athelstan, as he was living on my multimuse. modern and historical lives in me, though, and I am mainly on here & sansa, as a clear window, of understanding where I am on my personal living discord. so with my phone note discord, I can talk either ic or ooc on sansa and athelstan in some colours of brilliance, which I outlined a bit in clear chronological, which watching TV / YT / Spotify / just natural air helps. Oh also, I could sometimes pop in on actual discord too, ( yet that is less predictable as I needed that for so long, just to know myself & reality ) as it is one clear space (well, more than one space, but still just one app) to centre me. I am just invisible now, so even if i am actually on there or not, I am okay with knowing what it is, as well as it being in the background at times in my life. So grey area, crow fluttering.

i could continue stories on S & A, referencing from when I felt at peace with them living on my mumu ( they would originally stay as they are ). another reason, well, that I need miles here as a visual remember as I live my life in the present, is that alex standall is struggling to just live life in this modern world ( he is ‘nice’ with his soft voice and jess says he is quiet yet I see his anger ), and I also see in general that shy sensitive boys remind me of athelstan. for example, singers like alec benjamin sing in a high sweet ballad voice & is hurting yet then I literally just see him in a car and eating a sandwich and singing to people on the street.

I talked to my friend luuk, who does asmr. I watched the glasses one all the way through again on my iPhone 8 Plus, it a bit weird of his whispering. He’s cool.

I am thankful my friend invited me to a certain discord, as I needed that medication supplement. I spoke a little there, that helping with the ❌ in my brain. people are nice. I know a certain person has been really cruel for a long time ( yet okay - I needed a perspective email window ), mocking me as I try and try to be good, as I try and try to live my life, as I see specific rule guides that come into mind, they were haunting me, like billing / card & signature guideline. I was coughing really bad, and my brain felt like it was splitting / trying to not make me, well, die. I felt hot and cold sensation, I needing to touch the bathroom wall when I was showering, to steady me. I felt this dull indignancy of my body, which I needed to watch youtube on my 8 plus, like GOT7. I felt a bad chronic emptiness, as well as violent car crash dreams and people shooting me. I felt I was barely holding on in the world, I would be gone in the next second. okay, im describing different moments in time here, but you know. I know that was only one person at specific times in my life, yet the ensnarement was bad, affecting me and my judgement. It is also fucking evil how my surroundings treated me badly in its external validation / gaslighting / relatable stories, as I gasp for breath and my brain whirring to understand, while treating me like an anonymous insect fly, I feeling like my brain is like sour worms, with its scattered disarray. Yet I have user-run windows / could have one, now too, so that helps me breathe, to communicate better, even just a little to literally anyone in my vicinity, so the relational comm is not as bad. i need my natural surroundings to stay, okay, yet I have my tools for knowing my reality with that, so… -sighs- HMmm, I see you say I am a leftist, I fought to build my house with community building tools, and acknowledged / am so kind and nice to them too. So, I see on a site that explains quite clearly about catfi.shing, and speaking specifically about posts and messages in which one generally tries to live their life with hobbies. So for example, someone might receive a message or post they see on some site I’m trying to express myself in and post in their little clique in its context as it is + as well as surrounding links, as I noted in my little things observations ( stemming a lot on my mumu & fb initially ) as I was literally in fairytale television land / not understanding reality / drowning in terror of my whole life especially && I just…am known as that simply now ; yet just I hopefully calmer regaining my balance in the world. Just know, I say to myself, the little things observations article does portray by itself how scared and knowing I was of that very real conspiracy.

I also touched upon my very long disjointed jigsaw phone bookmarks that were the in the moment / aftermath of a site’s uprising ( I panicking and not understanding the settlement of my body of just really being with community after overworking for so long in silence ) in internal and external operation of my personal discord, as well as just mentioning their alreadied presence.

[whit0912]

About Me

Name: Whitney (Whit for short) Age: 32 Birthday: May 24 Hobbies: Gaming, Music, Writing, Reading

I'm a stay-at-home mom of one very adventurous two year old. I became a stay-at-home mom in May of 2024 because of a shoulder injury. We found out I have tendinitis in my rotatory cuff, which is going to cause a tear at some point in my life. The job I had involved some very heavy lifting and pushing parts on a hoist, which was worsening my condition. Therefore, my husband and I made the choice to have me stay home.

I enjoy playing video games on PC, Switch, and Xbox...if you want to be friends on any of those, let me know. I play The Sims 2, The Sims 3, The Sims 4, Harvest Moon Light of Hope, Story of Seasons A Wonderful Life, Animal Crossing New Horizons, Animal Crossing Pocket Camp Complete, Pokemon Scarlet, Pokemon Violet, Pokemon Sword, Pokemon Shield, Pokemon Let's Go Eevee, Pokemon Go, Destiny 2, Dragon Age The Veilguard, Hogwarts Legacy, Harry Potter Quidditch World Champion, Spiritfarer, Minecraft, and so many more games I can't list off the top of my head. But this kind of shows that I'm all over the place with games I like.

I also enjoy listening to music...like Backstreet Boys, BTS, Livingston, Tom MacDonald, Lydia the Bard, XEED, Sail North, Nick Carter, Aaron Carter, AJ McLean, Howie D, Cooper Alan, Baylee Littrell, Nsync, Black Gryph0n, Dove Cameron, Sofia Carson, Descendants soundtrack (and tons of other Disney stuff), Dream Street, Jesse McCartney, and so much more that I don't want to bore y'all with the full list. I also listen to Morbid: A True Crime Podcast...and all of this on Spotify.

I also write fanfictions, albeit I'm not the best and it's been a long time since I have written anything. But if you want to request things for me to write, feel free too! I can write for all of the following:

Twilight Saga Harry Potter (not the newer series coming out, the movies with Daniel Radcliffe) Ouran High School Host Club Fruits Basket Narnia (old school movie) Naruto Yu Yu Hakusho Yu-Gi-Oh (old school original stuff) Power Rangers (probably not the newer stuff without research)

There's probably more, but honestly I can't remember it all. So feel free to request one-shots or actual stories and I can write them out for you. Thank you for reading this if you did. Enjoy your day!

[bookeysnewsletter]

Reminiscences of a Stock Operator: Key Insights and Lessons

Chapter 1 What's Reminiscences of a Stock Operator by Edwin Lefèvre, Roger Lowenstein, Rick Rohan

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator," written by Edwin Lefèvre and often associated with figures like Roger Lowenstein and Rick Rohan, is a fictionalized biography of Jesse Livermore, one of the most famous stock traders in history. First published in 1923, the book chronicles Livermore’s trading techniques, philosophies, and psychological challenges in the stock market. It offers insights into market dynamics, speculation, and the emotional rollercoaster that traders face. Through the narrative, readers witness Livermore’s journey from a young boy working in a brokerage firm to becoming a legendary trader known for his immense wealth and equally profound losses. The book remains a classic in finance literature due to its timeless lessons about market behavior, human psychology, and the importance of discipline in trading.

Chapter 2 Reminiscences of a Stock Operator by Edwin Lefèvre, Roger Lowenstein, Rick Rohan Summary

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" is a classic book written by Edwin Lefèvre, based on the life of the legendary stock trader Jesse Livermore. Published in 1923, the book offers insights into Livermore's trading strategies, psychology, and the stock market.

 Summary:

Plot Overview:

The book follows the fictional character Larry Livingston, who parallels Jesse Livermore's life as he navigates the ups and downs of stock trading. Livingston shares his experiences, reflecting on the lessons he learned along the way, offering a unique perspective on the behavior of the market and traders.

Key Themes:

1. Market Psychology:

- The book emphasizes the importance of understanding market sentiment and the psychology behind trading. Livermore notes that fear and greed are powerful forces that influence investor behavior.

2. Trading Discipline:

- Successful trading requires discipline and the ability to stick to a strategy. Livermore discusses the importance of cutting losses quickly and letting profits run.

3. Risk Management:

- Livermore highlights that recognizing and managing risk is crucial for long-term success in trading. He advises traders to be aware of their position sizes and market conditions.

4. Learning from Experience:

- The narrative stresses the necessity of learning from both successes and failures. Livermore recounts his own missteps and the wisdom gained from them.

5. Speculation vs. Investment:

- Livermore makes a distinction between investing and speculating, suggesting that speculation involves shorter time frames and a more active approach to trading, whereas investing is typically more long-term.

 Influence and Legacy:

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" has been revered by traders and investors for its timeless insights into the nature of financial markets. Many consider it essential reading for those looking to understand the art and science of trading, and its lessons remain relevant even in today's market environment.

The book's narrative style makes it enjoyable to read, while its themes resonate with anyone interested in the challenges and strategies involved in the world of stock trading.

Chapter 3 Reminiscences of a Stock Operator Author

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" is primarily attributed to Edwin Lefèvre, although it is often thought of as somewhat autobiographical, as it chronicles the experiences of the fictional character Larry Livingston, who is based on the real-life trader Jesse Livermore.

 Edwin Lefèvre

- Biography: Edwin Lefèvre (1871–1943) was an American author and journalist known for his works on finance and trading. He was a financial journalist and wrote several books, but he is best known for "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator," which was published in 1923.

- Other Works: Lefèvre authored several other books, including:

- "The Market Bazaar" (1925)

- "The Man Who Sold America" (1928)

- "The Sacred Tree" (1930)

 Roger Lowenstein

- Contribution: Roger Lowenstein is a financial journalist and author best known for his books on financial markets and notable figures in investing. While he did not write "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator," he has written introductions and analyses related to the book and its themes. Some of his notable works include:

- "When Genius Failed: The Rise and Fall of Long-Term Capital Management" (2000)

- "Buffett: The Making of an American Capitalist" (1995)

 Rick Rohan

- Role: There may be some confusion regarding Rick Rohan, as he is not widely recognized as a key figure associated with "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator." If you have specific contextual information about him in relation to the book, that would help in providing a clearer picture.

 Best Editions of Reminiscences of a Stock Operator

- Editions: Many editions of "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" have been published since its original release. The best editions often include additional commentary, analysis, or introductions.

- Some recommended editions:

- The 1994 edition by John Wiley & Sons, which includes commentary by financial professionals and contextual analysis.

- The leather-bound editions or those published by collectible presses that offer a high-quality print experience for collectors and serious readers.

Overall, "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" is highly regarded within financial literature and continues to be a recommended read for those interested in stock trading and market psychology.

Chapter 4 Reminiscences of a Stock Operator Meaning & Theme

Reminiscences of a Stock Operator Meaning

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" is a classic book published in 1923, written by Edwin Lefèvre. It is often regarded as one of the most insightful accounts of trading and investing in the stock market, and it is presented as a fictionalized biography of Jesse Livermore, a famous stock trader of the early 20th century. The book captures the inner workings of trading, the psychology behind market moves, and the experiences of a trader over the years.

 Key Themes and Meanings:

1. Psychology of Trading: The book emphasizes the importance of psychological factors in trading. It illustrates how traders’ emotions can influence their decisions, often leading to mistakes. Understanding one's own psychology is critical for success in the stock market.

2. Market Cycles: Lefèvre details the cyclical nature of markets, showing how trends shift and how important it is for traders to adapt their strategies as conditions change.

3. Risk Management: The narrative stresses the importance of money management and risk control. Livermore's experiences serve as a reminder of the necessity of having a plan and managing risk appropriately to survive in the volatile environment of stock trading.

4. Experience and Learning: The protagonist’s journey of making mistakes, learning from them, and ultimately gaining wisdom echoes the idea that experience is a vital teacher in the world of trading.

5. Speculation vs. Investment: The book distinguishes between speculative trading and long-term investing. Livermore's strategies largely revolve around speculation, and a significant part of the narrative is about his ability to read market trends and changes.

 Contributions by Roger Lowenstein and Rick Rohan:

Roger Lowenstein is known for writing about finance and investing, and he has penned a preface for some editions of "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" that contextualizes the work within the history of finance and its relevance to modern markets. His insights help readers understand the timeless nature of the lessons in the book.

Rick Rohan may refer to additional commentary or analysis about the book, discussing its impact on traders and its status as a seminal work about the dynamics of buying and selling stocks.

 Conclusion:

Overall, "Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" remains a highly influential work in the field of trading literature, offering timeless wisdom about the markets, trading psychology, and the mindset needed to navigate the complexities of stock trading. Its teachings are applicable not only in the context of the early 20th century but continue to resonate with traders and investors today.

Reminiscences of a Stock Operator Theme

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" by Edwin Lefèvre is a classic work in the realm of financial literature, often considered a semi-autobiographical account of the life and experiences of the famous stock trader Jesse Livermore. The novel captures numerous themes that resonate throughout the world of trading and investment.

Here are some of the central themes of the book:

1. Market Psychology: The book delves into the emotional and psychological aspects of trading. Lefèvre highlights how fear, greed, and market sentiment can influence investor behavior and market trends. Understanding psychology is portrayed as a crucial skill for a successful trader.

2. Speculation vs. Investment: A clear distinction is made between speculation and investment. The protagonist emphasizes that trading often involves short-term strategies and the ability to read market movements rather than long-term investment strategies based on fundamental analysis.

3. Discipline and Strategy: The importance of discipline in trading is a recurrent theme. The protagonist learns that following a well-thought-out strategy and sticking to it, even in the face of emotional reactions or market volatility, is vital for sustained success.

4. Learning from Mistakes: The narrative illustrates the inevitable setbacks and failures that come with trading. It emphasizes the importance of learning from one's mistakes, adapting strategies, and using past experiences to inform future decisions.

5. The Role of Information and Rumors: The significance of information—both accurate and misleading—is a crucial theme. The protagonist often navigates a landscape filled with rumors and market gossip, highlighting the need for discernment and critical analysis in trading.

6. Self-Reflection and Personal Growth: The journey of the protagonist is also one of self-discovery. Throughout the story, he reflects on his motivations, flaws, and the impact of his actions, indicating that personal growth is as essential as financial success.

7. The Cycle of Market Trends: The book discusses the cyclical nature of markets—booms and busts, trends and reversals. Understanding market cycles is presented as integral to making informed trading decisions.

8. Isolation and Pressure: The life of a trader can be isolating, and the pressure to succeed can be overwhelming. The book explores how these factors affect the protagonist’s personal relationships and mental well-being.

These themes combine to create a rich narrative that not only recounts the experiences of a trader but also serves as a broader commentary on the nature of financial markets and human behavior. Overall, Lefèvre's work remains relevant today, providing timeless insights into the art and craft of trading.

Chapter 5 Quotes of Reminiscences of a Stock Operator

Reminiscences of a Stock Operator quotes as follows:

"Reminiscences of a Stock Operator" by Edwin Lefèvre is a classic book that provides insights into the stock market through the fictionalized memoir of Jesse Livermore, a famous stock trader. The book offers many valuable lessons and reflections on trading, psychology, and market behavior. Here are ten notable quotes from or inspired by the themes in the book:

1. "The stock market is never obvious. It is designed to fool most of the people, most of the time."

2. "It is not whether you are right or wrong that is important, but how much money you make when you're right and how much you lose when you're wrong."

3. "Successful traders always follow the trend, even when they don’t like where it’s heading."

4. "In the end, the market is a game of survival; it's not about the money, but about staying in the game."

5. "The ability to focus and make decisions despite uncertainty is the cornerstone of success in trading."

6. "A man’s character is his fate, and it is especially true for traders. Your habits and practices will shape your trading success."

7. "It takes a lot of courage to realize that you may be wrong, but the true test is what you do once that realization comes."

8. "Keep your losses small and let your profits run; that is the essence of successful trading."

9. "One of the best things a trader can do is to keep a journal of their trades; it helps to learn from both successes and mistakes."

10. "Market fluctuations offer opportunities; only the prepared mind can seize them."

These quotes reflect the core principles of trading, mindset, and risk management that Lefèvre highlights throughout the book. They continue to resonate with traders and investors today.

Chapter 6 Similar Books Like Reminiscences of a Stock Operator

Certainly! Here’s a list of five engaging books that delve into the world of finance, trading, and investment, providing insights into market psychology, strategy, and the experiences of traders and investors.

 1. "Market Wizards" by Jack D. Schwager

This classic series of interviews with some of the most successful traders in the world offers profound insights into their philosophies and strategies. Schwager dives deep into the minds of these market wizards, exploring their techniques and the psychological challenges they faced, making it a must-read for anyone looking to enhance their trading mindset.

 2. "The Intelligent Investor" by Benjamin Graham

Often referred to as the bible of value investing, this book offers sound investment principles and advice that stand the test of time. Graham’s approach focuses on risk management and long-term strategy, providing readers with the philosophy necessary to navigate the complexities of the stock market. A great read for both beginners and seasoned investors.

 3. "Flash Boys" by Michael Lewis

In this gripping narrative, Michael Lewis exposes the rise of high-frequency trading (HFT) and its implications for the stock market. The story centers around a group of traders who aim to expose the unfair advantages of HFT firms. It's an eye-opening account of how technology has influenced trading, revealing the inner workings of Wall Street in an engaging and accessible way.

 4. "A Random Walk Down Wall Street" by Burton G. Malkiel

This seminal book presents the efficient market hypothesis and outlines the concept of a random walk in stock prices. Malkiel discusses various investment strategies, including index funds and long-term investing, making it an excellent guide for both new investors and those looking to refine their understanding of market dynamics.

 5. "The Little Book of Common Sense Investing" by John C. Bogle

Written by the founder of Vanguard Group, this concise book champions the benefits of low-cost index fund investing. Bogle emphasizes a long-term investment approach based on sound principles rather than market timing. It is a refreshing reminder of the power of patience and disciplined investment, perfect for anyone seeking to build wealth over time.

These five books collectively offer a wealth of knowledge about trading and investing, blending personal stories, financial theory, and practical advice. Whether you’re a novice or an experienced trader, these reads will provide you with valuable insights to enhance your financial journey.

Book https://www.bookey.app/book/reminiscences-of-a-stock-operator

Quotes https://www.bookey.app/quote-book/reminiscences-of-a-stock-operator

Flash Boys https://www.bookey.app/book/flash-boys

YouTube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-PkfwoYgimU

Amazom  https://www.amazon.com/Reminiscences-Stock-Operator-Edwin-Lef%C3%A8vre/dp/0471770884

Goodreads https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/100779.Reminiscences_of_a_Stock_Operator

[ramrodd]

Restoring America's Soul and Sanity: With Dr. Phil

COMMENTARY:

Dr, Phil, the Johnathan Livingston Seagull of the Jerry Springer Cage Match Reality Shoo.

This is the whole thing about the Family Values element of Supply Side economics, to dismantle the social structures of the community family structures depend upon for logistical integrity, Haiti is an example of what that looks like in the extreme, Haiti is result John Galt creates in Atlas Shrugged, The object of the Family Values trope is to shift the tax base for sustaining those social infrastructure mechanics entirely on families generating $50,000/tear or less and completely off people like Betsy DeVos, Elon Musk and Jeff Bezos . Family structures are too fragile to sustain that capital burden, All this homeschooling bullshit is all about eliminating any property taxes going to public schools and shifting the tax avoidance to paying the enrollment in anti-DEI Christian Academies. It is all white supremacist bullshit that is forcing the inefficient tribalism of Moses in the Wilderness. In this regards, Dr. Phil and David Brooks "Not David Broch) EW AGENTS OF THE Family Values agenda of the January 6 agenda for the hostile take over of America. David Brooks (not David Broch) is a career Fascist activist, Barack Obama's favority Fascist sociologists. Valarie Jarrett was the Obama gate keeper defending the University of Chicago business model Barack, Michelle and Hillary, Hillary's vote on Bankruptcy Reform was pure Supply Side economics, Nazification is insidious, It is like an evil enchantment that has the spiritual effect of carbon monoxide, You don't know it's killing you until the paramedic comes into focus above your race, January 6 should have been one of those permanent wake up calls for Party of Lincoln Republicans of the Jack Kemp persuasion. David Brooks  (not David Broch)  began his activist career being paid to prove Hillary Clinton was a lesbian as an agent of the anti-DEI agenda of white supremacists. Anti-DEI politics is anti-Family Structures politics, The Jack kemp Republicans in the Nixon White House were committed to a DEI future, Pat Buchanan and the Plumbers were the leading edge of the Elon Musk anti-DEI lobby with Dilbert as their brand. The neo-Nazis are complaining about the emerging coalition of Democrats and Republicans who are  tired of the cultural warfare of January 6 Conservatives committed to the hostile takeover of America by Trump's treason who voted to expel George Santos. The irony, of course, is that the January 6 agenda is trying to prevent Biden from fully implementing Reagan's New Federalism that completes Stage 2  of Eisenhower's 1956 Presidential Platform and launching the final paradigm shift of Stage 3 morphing into the Star Wars economics of 2001: A Space Odyssey, Jack Kemp's playbook for Affirmative Action as a Republican legacy of the Party of Lincoln is organically DEI.  The core ideals of the Declaration of Independence is DEI. Colin Powell was a direct consequence of DEI as a force multiplier for Esprit de Corps and the constant refreshing of the Tree of Liberty by the Army ROTC programs at HBCU like Hampton University, There is nothing more DEI than Eisenhower's 1956 Presidential Platform of the Indiana University School of Business,, if Mark Cuban is any example, If Mark Cuban is a Conservative, he's like Jesse Helms, who was more woke than Rev Al Sharpton, back in the day,: he's my kind of Conservative. Like Mitt Romney, Dr. Phil, like David Brooks (not David Brock) are shills for the right wing Father Knows Best paternalism of  Big Brother Fascism displayed at any Trump rally, By the 2026 mid terms, they will be as irrelevant as Jon Steward and Jerry Seinfeld,   Without relentless Nazification by white supremacists, David Brooks (not David Brock) wouldn't be a featured talking head on PBS but, given the moral confusion of the New York Times since the Pentagon Papers, he might still be  featured opinion writer,, Restoring the Party of Lincoln coalition of the GOP to dominance of the RNC will restore the soul and sanity of the Republican Par

[purpleplaid17]

Jess Watches // Mon 4 Mar // Day 161 Synopses & Favourite Scenes & Poll

Constellation (with B) 1x04 The Left Hand of God

Jo's life back home is not how she remembers it, and growing tension with Magnus adds to her feelings of alienation.

We thought we were just about following the breadcrumb trail they were leading us down but then the last 5 seconds had us listing all the different words for confusion. Bewildered. Befuddled. Puzzled. Flabbergasted. Dumbfounded. (We watched half this ep last week but my mate had to go help a ewe who was lambing. 🐑)

Ugly Betty (rw with mum) 3x17 Sugar Daddy

The Suarez family are threatened by eviction and have to buy the house to be able to stay. Meanwhile, Daniel and Wilhelmina apply for a government bailout to save Mode.

I remembered when Betty got the cheque that Matt was secretly wealthy but I don't really remember him in it much so I don't think that bodes well for them, or could be my memory tbf. And I want more scenes between Wilhelmina and Claire. The two sharpest rich bitches in all of New York.

Loudermilk (with mum) 1x01 A Girl in Trouble is a Temporary Thing

Under threat of losing his weekly meeting space, surly substance abuse counselor Sam Loudermilk (Ron Livingston) must try to make a connection with a young addict.

I first thought the flatmate was gonna be the ghost of an old friend, not really there. But multiple people interacted with him so that's out. He was a stereotypical asshole that will hopefully become more well-rounded as we watch. (sister recommended)

Eureka (rw) 2x13 A Night in Global Dynamics (s2 Finale)

A flesh eating virus has infected Global Dynamics, and the building goes into a security protocol that endangers everyone's lives.

I didn't remember Henry being evil but was still relieved that he wasn't helping Beverly and was using her to protect Kevin. Carter and Stark being reluctant besties was sweet. And ofc Jo saved the day because for a town full of geniuses, very few of them have any common sense lol.

[jmreyes9]

Photos from the Internet

 APRIL FOOLS CAME 13 DAYS LATE

By Jesse Reyes 

As I peered through my window, I could not believe my eyes.  I tried to pinch myself to make sure this was not just a dream.  I think I pinched myself too hard, because I hollered “ouch” when I did it!

What? It’s snowing? Don’t they know it’s the middle of April? They must have messed up the computer that determines the weather.  These thoughts came to my mind as I tried to shake my body, hoping what I was seeing wasn’t real.  Unfortunately it didn’t change.  And the snow continued to fall, albeit only in small flakes.

Snow in April in Chicago is almost unheard of, although Johnny Mathis must have seen snow in April because he mentions it in his song “The Twelfth of Never” where there are lines that go:

“Hold me close, never let me go,

Hold me close, melt my heart like April snow.”

 “The Twelfth of Never” which was written by Jerry Livingston, was one of my favorites when I was in high school and college in the Philippines. I would listen to the “cool” voice of Johnny Mathis as he sang, “Melt my heart like April snow”.

We never had snow in the Philippines, although there may have been some in the high mountains.  I never dreamed that the words April snow would come true when I came to live in Chicago.

So today, the 14th of April, I again saw my backyard blanketed with the “celestial confetti” and the leafless branches of the trees in my backyard which I had named after the three stooges—Curly, Larry and Moe—were draped with snow.  The tulips which had started to bloom, wilted and were sorry they had bloomed so early.  The temperatures hovered in the low 30’s.  A total accumulation of about 2 inches fell the whole day.  

The snow did not stick in my driveway, though.  So there was nothing to shovel or use the snow blower with. But even if it was necessary, my snow blower was ready and it still had enough gas for yet one more journey.

Written in Chicago, IL. in 2019. Published in Cyberlink April 2019 edited by Edna Domingo.  Posted on FB May 2023.