#━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ CRACK ⋮ NOT INTERESTED IN BEING POLITE OR HETEROSEXUAL.

[byanyan]

@skxrbrand replied to your post “ㅤdon't mind them, they're just jotting down a...”:

skar vc: you cant learn by taking notes you gotta put it into practice

tiny defiant mortal vc: you fuckin' volunteering, bud?? i'm not about to sit here and practice on myself :/

[byanyan]

they're holding eye contact, shifting on the balls of their feet and twitching like they've got an itchy trigger finger. if they're quick enough, they can probably splash a decent amount of glitter on him before he can obscure their vision... and it must seem like a fair trade-off, because in the next second they're swinging an arm out, releasing a cloud of sparkling colour into the air between the two of them. he can give them a hard time navigating for a few minutes, but they'll still have the last laugh if they get even a fraction of the glitter caught in his hair and clothes!

he sees the vibrating and the glitter packets, and locks eyes with the teen while pulling something out of his pocket. a metal gas canister (a smoke bomb, not one of his cyanide canisters). his thumb is on the release. which will drop first, glitter or smoke?

[stevieharringtonwifeguy]

Transfem Stevie who figures it out when she goes to a gay bar with Robin (post s3?) and meets another transwoman and has a Huh, you can do that? moment.

i sort of Went Off on this one lmaoo. bc im incapable of not steddifying everything this is now T4T Steddie 2: This Time They're Lesbians- with trans girl eddie cracking stevie's egg

PLEASE NOTE: this is set in the 80s, so they use kind of outdated terminology for trans people. also there's a d slur used in a positive, self-ID way. overall the vibes are good but the language is questionable. do with that what you will lol

When Robin asks Steve to be her ‘emotional support heterosexual’ (her words) for her first visit to an Indianapolis gay club, Steve prepares himself for a night of ‘hey, have you met my friend Robin’, pointedly not hitting on any girls, and politely declining offers of drinks and dances from guys until he’s buzzed enough to admit he’s curious. And so far, that’s exactly what he’s been doing. Robin’s off dancing with a girl after Steve assured her about ten times that he’d be fine on his own. He’s just debating whether or not his inhibitions are lowered enough to go dancing when his thoughts are interrupted by a voice to his right.

“Steeeeeeeve Harrington.”

Steve turns, already cringing. Anyone who says his name with a tone like that is someone who is not going to be thrilled with seeing him in a gay club. The thing is, Steve has no idea who this person is. Can’t even really tell if they’re a guy or a girl. Their features are fairly masculine, all lean muscles and square chin, but they’ve got long, wild hair and heavy eye makeup. The cropped muscle tank with ‘Massive Dyke’ printed in lurid red muddies the waters even further.

“Oh, hey… uh…” Yeah, Steve’s pulling a complete blank. They look kind of familiar? He’s definitely seen them around. Somewhere. 

They roll their eyes. “Not surprised King Steve doesn’t recognise me. Especially looking like this. What are you doing here?”

Steve sighs a little. “I’m here with a friend. She was nervous to come alone so I’m here for moral support and wingmanning.”

“Yeah, sure,” they scoff, and Steve frowns even more.

“Look, I know I was a dick in high school. And I’m genuinely sorry if I was a dick to you. But that was four years ago. I’ve grown up, and I’m here to be a good friend. Can you let me do that?”

The person blinks, and then looks a little sheepish. “Okay, yeah, that’s fair,” they say, before extending a hand. “And it’s Eddie. Eddie Munson.”

Steve smiles and shakes the offered hand. “Oh, yeah! You ran that club my kids went to- dungeons and dragons, right? Cool to see you again, dude!”

Eddie’s face does a complicated little wiggle before- “Uh, not a dude, man.”

“Wait, what?”

“I’m a girl, now. Still Eddie, though, it’s just short for Edith now. Have you heard of transsexuals?”

Steve shakes his head. “I’m pretty new to this. I know, like. Five words.”

“Well, easiest way to put it is that I was born a guy, but I feel more like a girl, so now I’m, like, switching.”

“Switching…” Steve says, trying his best to look genuinely interested and confused. He generally doesn’t struggle too hard to look confused, but he’s a little worried Eddie will think he’s being a dick about it. “You can do that?”

Eddie snorts, gesturing down to herself. “Clearly.”

“Huh,” Steve says. Frankly, this is blowing his mind. “Why doesn’t everyone do that, then? Like, no one likes being a guy.”

“Ye- wait, what?”

“Like, the sexism of being a girl would suck, obviously. But everything else sounds great! Like, you get prettier clothes and you can wear makeup- and girls are so nice to other girls, I've always been kind of jealous of that.”

Eddie looks shocked, but Steve's on a roll now, almost forgetting she's there as he continues thinking aloud. “And like. Girls’ bodies are just. Better, y'know? Like what do guys have, muscles? Girls can have muscles too, but girls are just so… like, everyone wants boobs, right?”

Eddie has a strange look on her face. “I mean, I do. Because I’m transsexual.”

“When you’re transsexual, do you get boobs? Like, do you- wait, is that rude? I feel like I wouldn’t ask another girl about her boobs.”

Eddie’s silent for a moment, looking at Steve in bewilderment, before she seems to collect herself. She takes a swig of her beer and then smiles at him. It looks both welcoming and like she’s in on a secret, and puts Steve at ease. He can see why the kids were so obsessed with her in high school.

“You know what, ordinarily it would be kind of rude, but I have a feeling this conversation is… not what I thought it was gonna be,” she says, and Steve tilts his head a bit in confusion. “So yeah, I do have boobs. You can take estrogen as a little pill, and it basically does puberty for you again. You get boobs, a little extra fat on your hips and thighs, and your skin gets softer. Here, feel.”

And then Eddie takes Steve’s hand and slides it up her shirt. His brain immediately turns off. And yeah, there’s definitely a gentle swell there. They’re small, but Steve can feel the squish of them. Her nipples are pierced. Steve thinks he might die.

“Wow,” he squeaks, about five embarrassing octaves higher than his normal tone. “Cool!”

Eddie grins as she removes his hand from her tit. “Yeah, cool. I’d let you fondle them a little more, sweetheart, but they’re still growing. Kind of sore.”

Steve blushes, rubbing his hand on his thigh and desperately trying to will his boner down. “Man, I wish I could grow boobs,” he sighs, a little wistfully.

“You can, y’know,” Eddie says, with a little chuckle and a soft smile. “What’s stopping you?”

That. Steve hasn’t considered that. A hundred things come to his lips- he’s not like that, he’s not one of those- a hundred things that he knows are absolutely terrible reasons. If Robin were here she’d either be whacking him upside the head or giving him that really sad look she does whenever he’s mean to himself.

“Hey,” Eddie says, speaking softly and laying a gentle hand on Steve’s knee. It shocks him out of his spiral as he looks up into her big brown eyes. “Y’know, I’ve got some makeup in my van. If you wanted to try some things out. No one here will judge you.”

“I- yeah,” Steve is breathless. “I’d like that. Uh- my friend-”

“Oh, is she real? I’ll be honest, I kinda thought you were doing the ‘oh I’m not gay I’m just here for a friend’ thing.”

Laughing, Steve looks out over the crowd. “No, she’s real. Let me just let her know I’ll be gone for a moment- honestly she’s probably halfway to third base with some girl anyway-”

And sure enough, Robin is more than ready to let Steve wander off once he peels her off a pretty girl on the opposite side of the club. He rejoins Eddie, who leads him down the street towards her van and helps him into the back. She takes out her makeup bag, cracking jokes about their wildly different styles while she delicately brushes powder over his face. She generously refrains from threatening to take his eye out with the eyeliner pencil (more than once at least), and apologises for not having anything more ‘babygirl’ than her bright red lipstick. Steve can definitely say this is the most fun he’s ever had in the back of a van.

Finally, masterpiece done, Eddie rummages in her bag for a little compact, presenting it to Steve with a dumb little bow. Steve takes it with a roll of his eyes, and prepares himself with a deep breath.

The person in the mirror is beautiful. Glowing skin, huge doe eyes lined with smokey eyeliner and lashes a mile long, practically sinful lips. Steve almost doesn’t recognise himself, except that he does. He really, really does, in a way he now realises he never really has before. It’s the first time he’s ever looked at his face in the mirror and not wanted to change anything.

“You’re a really pretty girl, Stevie,” Eddie says with a gentle smile.

Steve can’t look away from the mirror. “Yeah,” she says, a red-lipped grin stretching across her face. “I really am.”

[princejackal]

The RO List

This is a long time coming.

This is a list of confirmed ROs in the game. So far I’ve focused on love interests who your MC will meet early on in the game. Love interests from other kingdoms like Assyria, Babylon and one of the Aramean states have yet to be included.

In the game, marriage is about political gain. So your MC is suppose to marry for an alliance and not because they simply love the other person. While most love interests can be romanced by both male and female MCs, a marriage will only be recognised between heterosexual couples. But gay couples can have a private ceremony to affirm their relationship.

DISCLAIMER! Your MC can choose not to marry and be single. They can choose to monogamous to one person. Or they can decide to have numerous nameless concubines to bear children for them. It’s really up to you.

Now on to the list.

The Companions:

The first group of ROs are your three companions you’ll meet shortly after getting out of prison.

Name: Najim/Najima [M/F]

Race: Ghoul

Magic Type: Blood Manipulation, Shapeshifting

Description: Your friendly neighbourhood ghoul. N is the one who helps you out after you escape from prison. He/She sees your potential and is willing to go the extra mile for you. N doesn’t mind cracking a few skulls or eggs in order to secure back your throne. But don’t expect them to open up to you in the beginning. N has a past that they’d like to keep hidden.

Political Power: N doesn’t have a family to help you. In fact, N would be reluctant to marry your MC because it would cause a scandal. Even though N is a jinn, they are a wrong type of jinn. Ghouls are not seen in the best of light in the kingdom. Their shapeshifting ability has given them a bad reputation because shapeshifting is mostly used for espionage and assassination jobs.

Name: Leila [F]

Race: Qarin

Magic: Earth Manipulation

Description: Leila comes from a merchant family. But times have been hard for her family as trade routes have been monopolised in the kingdom and only those politically connected to the elites get good trade routes.

Leila is an excellent negotiator and can sell anything to anyone. Like any good merchant she has detractors who accuse her of being a charlatan and swindler who sells fake jewelry at highly inflated prices. But she never let’s criticism get in her way of securing the bag.

Political Power: Leila has contacts around the kingdom. Even though her family isn’t super rich, their wealthy enough and well-connected enough to assist you in reclaiming your throne. They won’t help you out for free but they expect the MC to pay them back.

Name: Zaki [M]

Race: Marid

Magic: Water Manipulation

Description: Zaki is currently a fisherman. He comes from a family of mercenaries. He spent years fighting for others in foreign lands. But he got sick and tired of the bloodshed. After the death of his younger brother, he decided to return to Jinnestan and live a simple life. But his simple life will become complicated when he helps the MC out and gets embroiled in the conflict between the MC and the vizier.

Political Power: Zaki comes from a good family. His family knows how to fight and can help the MC out in a war situation. The tribe Zaki comes from is known for their bravery. That’s why in the kingdom they’re hired to protect caravan routes from bandits.

The Betrothed:

You’ll first meet these two ROs during your twelfth birthday party. Your father wants to solidify your right to the throne. And has decided a good betrothal will put you in a good position.

The player is not forced to marry the person they’re betrothed to. After the incident that occurred in MC’s birthday party, the player is free to choose whoever they feel will secure them the throne.

Name: Raita [F]

Race: [Depends on MC’s Race Choice]

Magic: [Depends on MC’s First Elemental Power]

Description: Raita is your cousin from your father’s side. She’s known to be reserved and mostly keeps to herself. Raita is an excellent gardener and spends her free time tending to the plants in the palace. Surprisingly, your uncle finds Raita to be so non-threatening that she can go in and out of the royal palace without first seeking permission . But even though she’s quiet, she’s aware of her precarious position in court and tries hard to not arouse attention to herself. Raita however makes sure to keep notes on what goes on in the palace.

Political Power: Raita comes from the MC’s family tribe but is from a different clan than the MC. She’s your second cousin to be specific. A marriage with her would solidify your family’s support of you and de-legitimise the vizier.

Name: Qaus [M] (*NB: I’ve yet to change his name currently in demo)

Race: Half-Jinn, Half-Nephilim

Magic: Levitation

Description: Qaus is the second eldest son of the king of Edom. He believes he’s better than his brother and therefore should rule Edom. But his father has other plans. So most of the time his bored and spends reading scrolls from scholars. He longs for adventure and a chance to prove himself to his father.

Political Power: Qaus is a prince. A marriage with him would create an alliance between two kingdoms. Such an alliance would be beneficial for the MC. But it also poses a risk as Edom frequently comes into conflict with Israel and could drag Jinnestan into it if the MC is not careful.

High Risk, High Reward:

So this marriage would be very controversial and has many pitfalls for the MC. But if MC plays their cards right, you can end up on top. So here are two siblings from the second powerful tribe in the kingdom.

Name: Suhail [M]

Race: Hinn

Magic: Wind Manipulation

Description: Suhail is known to be carefree. He loves going out and partying hard. Coming from a very rich and powerful family, he organises a party every week in his house. Most people don’t take him seriously. He’s seen as a goofball, a guy who likes cracking jokes at inappropriate times. And Suhail prefers having people think he’s not a serious threat.

Political Power: Suhail belongs to the second most powerful tribe in the kingdom. During the war of unification, Suhail’s tribe opposed MC’s father and allied themselves with other tribes who didn’t want Arabia to be united. But at the final battle against your father, Suhail’s tribe switched sides in the middle of fighting. They betrayed their allies and launched a surprise attack from the rear against their former allies.

This would hand a total victory to your father. And MC’s father decided to reward Suhail’s tribe for switching sides. Over time, the tribe became more powerful and richer. They’re pretty much distrusted by most people in the kingdom for their dishonorable act. But a marriage with them will give you a powerful ally. So powerful that they could consume the MC in their web if the player is not careful.

Name: Samar [F]

Race: Hinn

Magic: Wind Manipulation

Description: Unlike her brother, Suhail, who enjoys partying all the time, Samar tries to get people to take her seriously. She spends her free time writing and publishing poems and stories. She organises poetry competitions at her home and provides financial support for young artists in the capital. Samar uses most of her income for charitable ventures like building orphanages and giving aid to poor widows.

She’s trying hard to repair her family reputation the best she can. But she can be vindictive. She’ll use her power and influence to crush anyone who mocks or speaks ill of her family.

Political Power: Again just like her brother, she belongs to a powerful tribe. A tribe that could help MC instead of supporting the vizier.

And that's it for now. The re-write is chugging along well

[shxtodxroki]

Hello, are matchups still open? If they are, can I request one?

Here's my info:

Gender - Female

Sexuality - Heterosexual

Age - 18

MBTI - ISTJ

Appearance:

My height is 4'9" and I have round, brown eyes.

I have long, straight black hair and tan skin.

My face is round and small.

There are birthmarks (moles) on my legs; one on each leg.

Personality:

I would describe myself as funny, patient, sensitive.

I'm reserved and a hopeless romantic. Sometimes, I overthink or feel insecure.

To strangers, I seem cold or aloof.

My friends think I'm kind, smart, trustworthy.

Hobbies: drawing, playing video games, writing, listening to music, graphics design

Interests: books, art, music, poetry, folklore

Love language: acts of service

Few facts about me:

• Plushies are comfort objects to me.

• I have family problems with my parents.

Hi hi, thank you for sending in a match-up request! I’m sorry it took me a while to get to, but I hope you enjoy your match-up and thank you for being so polite and kind in his request! :D

I’d Match You With: 

Mirio Togata! :)

Reasoning:

From your description of yourself, I feel like Mirio’s the kind of boyfriend who would fit perfectly into your life, the kind who would make your days brighter and be the kind of boyfriend you need by your side :)

Headcanons About Your Relationship:

- Mirio’s the perfect boyfriend for you if you consider yourself a hopeless romantic, because he’s huge on romantic gestures and displays of affection. He’s constantly trying to woo you and show you exactly how much he loves you no matter how long you’ve been dating, and he always makes sure you feel totally and utterly loved by him every second of the day <3

- Mirio loves playing video games with you! He’s not like, a pro or anything, but he likes gaming in his free time and he’s pretty decent at it! Whether he’s just watching you play, you’re watching him play because you’re too tired to join in, or you’re playing a co-op game together he’s happy, always cuddling into your side even when you’re playing together because he’s clingy like that lol

- Mirio knows that you like poetry, so on big days like your birthday or anniversary, he’ll write cute little poems for you detailing how much he loves you and how thankful he is to have you in his life <3 They’re not super scholarly or eloquent or anything like that, but they perfectly convey the way he feels about you and he puts his absolute heart and soul into each and every one of them in order to make sure you feel cared for and appreciated :)

- Mirio actually quite likes stuffed animals too, and he totally buys them for you all the time! You have a few that you keep at his place to cuddle with when you spend the night with him, and he even likes to buy matching plushies for the two of you, so you can think of him whenever you’re cuddling your plushies at home even if he’s not physically with you at the moment 

- Once Mirio figures out your love language is acts of service, then he’s always taking care of you and doing small things to show you he cares. He’ll make you lunch in the mornings before you head off to school/work (and he always includes a cute little note), get some chores done for you if you tell him you’re exhausted and had a particularly rough day, and he’ll run a nice bubble bath for you and carefully wash your long hair for you once you get home from school/work in the evening <3

- He’ll never, ever push you to talk about your issues with your parents if you don’t feel comfortable discussing them, but he does make sure that he’s always there to listen if you need to vent to him. He supports you completely and hates how upset you can get when issues arise with your parents, and he’s happy to wrap you in his arms and comfort you whenever they make you upset

- He also thinks you’re hilarious, he really adopted Nighteye’s mindset that laughter is essential to a good life so he’s always cracking up at your jokes :) He literally makes you feel like the funniest person in the world, he always makes sure to tell you how funny a joke was or how hilarious the story you told him was

- Mirio’s kind of a sucker for kissing your birthmarks :) Whenever he sees them he immediately leans in to press a kiss to each one without hesitation, he just finds them really cute and happily takes any chance to kiss you :)

Song For Your Relationship:

Labyrinth by Taylor Swift!

[moonshrouded]

character tags.

✦ ╱ canon div. — ❛ hell’s empty，the devils are all here.

✦ ╱ hc. — ❛ we’re all going to die，i intend to deserve it.

✦ ╱ aes. — ❛ not yet corpses，still we rot.

✦ ╱ musings. — ❛ a heart full of midnight thoughts.

✦ ╱ ic. — ❛ i’m meaner than my demons.

✦ ╱ character study. — ❛ hollow is our chest.

✦ ╱ visage. — ❛ darkness lives in me.

✦ ╱ tartarus. — ❛ the gang goes to hell.

✦ ╱ behavior. — ❛ business in the front，knife in the back.

✦ ╱ meta. — ❛ destruction is a form of creation.

✦ ╱ text. — ❛ not interested in being polite or heterosexual.

✦ ╱ crack. — ❛ in memory of when i gave a shit.

✦ ╱ solomon. — ❛ tba.

✦ ╱ risa. — ❛ tba.

[byanyan]

grimesucker​.

dox, watching byan pick on carter : you’re the top favorite brat this week.

byan, incredulous:  i’m not the favourite every week???

[writtenfate]

tag drop ooc

[silriven]

The Vow Eternal

This is an edit of my compiled thoughts and favorite quotes originally posted in a readthrough on Twitter about The Vow Eternal, the new short story that features Wrathion.

*sighs, rolls up sleeves, cracks knuckles*

Alright.  Let's see what we've got.

First off, I love the cover art.  After 2+ years of low key dreading that when Wrathion made his post-BfA return, it would be as a villain or antagonist, it's been pretty nice to see him depicted heroically, even enveloped in a golden glow.  We've really been spoiled with good art for him this expansion, which hasn't even come out yet.

No. I must not look up. But no sooner did he think it than he began to twist and shriek. Metal plating spread over him, containing him as he contorted into a form less of solid flesh than of liquid fire.  When the horrifying transformation was complete, the monster he had become, fueled by hatred and rage, opened its massive iron jaws. “There is no Wrathion!” the thing of metal and magma cried. The voice was dreadful, heart-stopping, and . . . familiar.  “There is only I, Deathwing—now and always,” Wrathion found himself hissing. But it was not his mouth. He watched, helpless, as the Aspects swooped to attack him, as the black dragons doubled back to blast him, their old enemy made anew . . .  All they saw was Deathwing.

...ok, to start, I am pleasantly surprised that we're kicking off with the implications that Wrathion regularly has Deathwing body horror nightmares, a type of Wrathion angst that is very near and dear to my heart.  Good, strong start.  

Short story: 1

Silriven's dignity: 0

Wrathion composing himself after shouting out in his sleep is a nice touch.   It's also interesting to note that Wrathion drinks a lot of wine...or at least has been recently.  Also, he's spending time at the Horde inn at the Shrine of Two Moons, rather than the Alliance inn.  Maybe he’s also giving The Tavern in the Mists a wide birth because he hasn’t reconciled with Tong, though I’d like to think that the Black Prince, not unlike the Lannisters, always repays his debts...eventually.

Wrathion scoffed. The pleasure of your company. Ha! This wedding was a monumental event in Azeroth’s history—the joining of two powerful leaders—and yet he knew he had been invited only as a courtesy. No one in Azeroth really wanted a black dragon—especially him—at any sort of grand occasion. It was good political theater to trot out someone so instrumental in defeating the old god N’Zoth and saving the world, but neither the couple nor their high-profile guests would deem being in his company a pleasure.

So far I think I'm on board with Wrathion being self conscious about attending a social event like this, it makes sense.  Credit where credit's due, I have to say it's also nice seeing attention drawn to his role in N'zoth's defeat instead of dwelling on War Crimes/WoD.

Wrathion crumpled the scroll with unnecessary vigor and flung it into a corner. Weddings were notoriously sappy affairs, and this one was likely to be especially so. According to the reports of his Black Talon operatives, it was a true love match, one that had blazed to a flame during a poetry competition, of all things. There would be other giggling, happy pairs; families with their giddy children; old friends reuniting.

Positively stomach-churning.

This is how I also feel about Lor'themar & Thalyssra's great big heterosexual wedding getting center stage so no complaints here.

There was High Chieftain Baine Bloodhoof, who, Wrathion observed with a sly grin, came with Mayla Highmountain.

Jesus, and people make fun of shippers for pairing two people who have just stood next to each other.  Sorry, I really would be enjoying this a little more if it was like, Shaw and Flynn's wedding or something.  Joking aside, I like the implication that Wrathion keeps up with Horde gossip, or maybe this comes from Ebyssian passing on Highmountain gossip to his brother.

In the past, Wrathion had sought to protect Azeroth by pitting Horde and Alliance against one another, in order to determine which side was the mightier. Now he understood that the fate of the world hung not on conquest but on collaboration.

Character growth, we love to see it.  I think this is one thing that most WoW players don’t understand is that the betrayal is a feature of Wrathion x Anduin, not a bug.

Anduin, the king of Stormwind who had been absent from that role over the past few years, had always believed permanent peace was possible between the two factions. He had worked toward that goal with a quiet tenacity that Wrathion had admired. After the Fourth War, Anduin’s hope had become a cautious reality.

There's something kind of poignant about the Horde and the Alliance finally gathering together in peace and Anduin, someone who's fought hard for this, being absent and unable to experience it.

At this point, overall, I'm surprised by how much I don't hate this.  Roguish Wrathion deciding to utilize the party to listen for "tidbits" of interesting conversation is good, Taelia being awed to meet him is good, Kalec being happy to see him is also good.  Fairshaw cameo is...better than nothing I suppose.

Taelia’s eyes widened, and she took a step toward him. “I am honored to meet you. I hear the world owes you great thanks.”

Seriously, Taelia x Wrathion shippers come get your JUICE 😍

Wrathion spread out his arms as he strode toward them. “Magni!” he cried, genuinely glad to have spotted him, for the two had worked together to defeat N’Zoth.

“Och! Wrathion! Come here, laddie, an’ let me introduce ye to my family. Me brothers, Muradin and Brann, and me dear daughter, Moira.”

“I of course know all your names,” Wrathion said with a dashing wink. It was true. “And what a pleasure to finally meet you,” he added, taking in the lively bunch.

“Oh, we know about you too!” Moira said. “Me da here willna shut up!”

Wrathion was caught off guard. Such a warm welcome almost undid him. The feeling was . . . contagious.

So this section right here, where Magni and his family give Wrathion a warm welcome like this and Wrathion is taken back by it?  This is the moment where my stone cold heart defrosted.  I still think Wrathion’s familial connection to Blackrock Mountain and the Dark Iron dwarves would be a great thing for World of Warcraft to explore.

Wrathion understood not having many friends—or any friends. He’d never truly been a child; he had grown so swiftly and been driven by so dark a purpose that there had been no time for play. Of course, a childhood disrupted by wars and conflicts didn’t help. Meeting Anduin in Pandaria had been both a gift and a curse. A gift, because Wrathion had learned that someone, anyone, might deem him worth caring for. A curse, because Wrathion had chosen to exploit Anduin’s trust in an ill-conceived attempt to protect Azeroth. They had met again years later, and that encounter had been . . . Well, suffice it to say Anduin had a much better right cross than Wrathion had given him credit for. He hoped they could reconcile once Anduin returned from . . . wherever he was.

Wrathion drained his glass, and the strange ache in his chest returned.

This is the really interesting bit, the part where Wrathion addresses Anduin directly.  I think hell has frozen over or I'm reading something incorrectly because this reads like confirmation that Anduin cared for Wrathion and that Wrathion feels heartache when he thinks about that.  It’s unexpected and...honestly, pleasant.

Kurog kept going, scrutinizing him. “How were you made, Wrathion? Cobbled together out of pieces of corpses? You and your depraved kin . . . You are the very symbol of all that has gone wrong in this world.” While most onlookers murmured in shock at Kurog’s words, Wrathion heard a voice from deep in the crowd cheering the tauren on.

A chill ran through Wrathion, but not from the voice of dissent in the crowd. Rather, from the peculiarity that a shaman would know this bit of awfully specific information. He wondered if he was the reason the tauren had decided to show up . . .

This part was also interesting, too, I wonder how the shaman found out this information or if it will come up again.  I kind of respected and liked how blunt this was, if they were going to keep Wrathion’s strange origins as is, it was a good way to utilize that information during this tense scene.  I think it also made for a good lead-in to the part where Wrathion looses his temper.  Something like this, so personal and said in public, in front of high ranking members of both the Horde and the Alliance, would make him loose his temper.

“You’re very kind, but I should have realized that my presence here would be . . . provocative . . . to some. I hope this did not tarnish your memories of this most joyful occasion. I must depart, and I wish you both nothing but happiness for all your days.”

They did not protest.

“I owe you my thanks,” Baine chimed in. “Kurog is a powerful shaman. He—”

Wrathion held up a hand, flashing a charming smile. “No need for thanks.” The black dragon bowed, straightened his shoulders, and strode off without another word.

Ouch 💔

“Kalecgos! What do you wish of me?”

The blue dragon lifted a bottle of arcwine and two glasses. “Some help in drinking this fine vintage.”

Kalec comforting Wrathion is sweet, so is Wrathion returning the favor.  I don’t ship the two but I cheer it on enthusiastically from the sidelines.  At least you don’t get the jokes about Anduin being a domestic abuser over there.

So at this point I started getting worknight tired and was a little distracted by figuring out that the mechanics/metaphor of the heartache that Wrathion has been feeling throughout the story are a literal affliction, the pull of the Dragon Isles on all of dragonkind to come home.  I didn’t really appreciate the weight of the next part until I read the short story a second time the following day.  I thought that Wrathion’s pain was going to be explained as him not recognizing what perfectly ordinary heartache is, but then Kalecgos is revealed to have the same feeling in addition to other dragons who have congregated at Wyrmrest.

Alexstrasza stepped forward and, as if there was not and never had been mistrust or resentment between them, gently placed a hand on his face. To his own surprise, he allowed it, comprehending that the significance of this moment transcended any quarrels.

“Young one,” the Dragon Queen said, exchanging a sage look with Nozdormu, “you have heard the call . . . and you have answered.”

Wrathion did not understand. “The call?”

“Yes, the call,” she said, speaking to all of those standing closely around her. “One long awaited. All of us—here, below, anywhere in the world—we have all been called, and we have heard it with our hearts. The Dragon Isles are awaiting our return.”

“But . . .” Wrathion shook his head, still not comprehending.

“Wrathion,” she said softly, “you are homesick.”

The ache. The desperate longing for something he had never had.

“Homesick?”

The Dragon Isles had never been denied to him. They were only waiting. For him, and for every other dragon in Azeroth. His people. Wrathion had not been excluded.

He was being welcomed.

He belonged.

This?  This bit is nice.  Wrathion being accepted and welcomed by the dragons, especially their queen, truly, for lack of a better phrase, sparks joy.  The one-two punch of Wrathion realizing that he is homesick for a home he never had and then feeling welcomed by other dragons as a part of the family does land emotionally, at least for me.  My one quibble is I wish Ebyssian was included in this moment, being the first dragon that Wrathion sees as family.  Ebyssian is curiously absent in this short story, though it juggles so many characters as it is.

I think this also reframes the later questline in Dragonflight proper where Sabellian is questioning Wrathion's right to seek the title of Aspect, knowing that Alexstrasza and other dragons of Azeroth, like Kalecgos, do accept him as he is and as one of their own.  It softens how harsh this interaction is, when you take into consideration that Wrathion’s mother was forced to breed by the Red Dragonflight and her whelps, including Wrathion, were experimented on with the end goal of curing the Black Dragonflight of the Old Gods’ corruption.  This is the one obscure lore fact that I keep hammering on, sorry, I know it gets old but

[ “Everything not saved will be lost. - Quit screen message, Nintendo ]

I don't think we were going to get a satisfying resolution to the old conflicts between the Red and the Black Dragonflights, one that addressed the experiments done to Nyxondra's children for example, so in my opinion this isn't a bad way to start fresh.  I kind of don’t want this game to touch the subject of forced dragon breeding again.  The way this MMORPG approaches its story doesn’t lend the kind of nuance and gravitas you need to tackle a story like that in good taste.  Let's have a new narrative.

Overall I really liked this short story.  I think this is better characterization than the snippets I’ve seen from the so far from the Obsidian Citadel questline in the alpha/beta, or at least complements it better.  I’m also a little self conscious because, to be honest, after Shadowlands, my expectations for Dragonflight have been practically on the floor.  World of Warcraft can be hard to talk about, too, because content comes out at such a slow drip feed, there's a lot of excitement when things drop.  I've been looking forward to the possibility of a Wrathion short story for a while so I'm also trying not to get too swept away in the hype.  Still, Wrathion enduring both a wedding and its guests is a fun ride.

tldr; Wrathion needs more gentle touches to his face, I can get behind this short story.

[thehollowprince]

"Pretty girl, pretty boy, and boom, instant couple." fandom and shipping culture has just completely warped our brains hasn't it? As if it isn't still important to see interracial couples in media, the fact that they are (presumably) heterosexual doesn't make it any less groundbreaking. Same with Scott and Kira, because how often does a popular show feature an interracial couple where neither party is white?

Oh, you are preaching to the choir!

Fandom has gotten to the point where it's so far removed from its source material that they might as well be two entirely separate entities.

For example, I saw a post recently that really hit the nail on the head.

Squid Game.

I can't tell you how many memes I saw making light of the show's incredibly heavy and dark subject matter. Or the fanarts that sexualized the guys in the red jumpsuits and geometric masks. Hell, I even saw celebrities that were having Squid Game themed parties, where they dressed up in costumes from the show. Fandom looked at this show about the exploitation of the poor by the wealthy for their entertainment, and said "it's all about the aesthetics".

It gets worse when you add shipping into the mix.

I have said it before and I'll say it again: shipping is the death of fandom.

Too many people are concerned with making their coffee shop AUs or their Soulmate AUs (or whatever) and not the actual text they're supposed to be basing everything on.

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate a good AU as much as the next person, but I base my opinions on characters and ships on what actually happened "on screen".

What is truly baffling about the whole thing, particularly in fandoms like Teen Wolf, is how shipping not only completely dominates the fandom, but attempts to rewrite canon as well.

When I started to get involved in the fandom, season three was airing. I had only just finished season one, and so you can imagine my confusion when I saw that Sterek was such a big part of that fandom. At first I thought that maybe something had happened in the second season that I hadn't gotten to yet, but once I watched it, I was even more confused. There is literally nothing behind that ship except two pretty faces. Their entire relationship throughout the actual show was either sarcastic barbs or being outright antagonistic to each other. To make matters worse, they then rewrite the entire show to make the ship seem plausible to them and others, so that everything that created these characters and the story itself is now meaningless, because they've moved completely into an AU.

But then, when you criticize said ship, you get either harassed by A, or accused of being a homophobe. With the latter, I got a lot of messages back in the day, because I was more interested in Danny... y'know, the actual gay character on the show. But no, fandom chose to focus on a crack ship composed of two characters that had never been described as anything other than heterosexual.

But like you said, interracial relationships are important, and yet sadly incredibly rare, especially those where both parties aren't white. Sadly, that brings us back to the racism that permeates fandom. It's neither surprising nor unexpected, though maybe a little startling in its ferocity, but no, never a surprise. After all, racism is built into every aspect of our society, from our infrastructure to our politics to our educational system. Of course it'll be in our entertainment as well.

Racism and heteronormativity are the cornerstones that our society is built on. And you may be asking yourself, what does the latter have to do with a slash ship. Well, after looking at it for years, I can tell you that Sterek is a slash ship written for (and by) straight people. It's one of a number.

[wyvernscales]

Here’s my chapter by chapter analysis of Asunder. Technically spoilers but also not at all.

Ch 1: This one’s sparing no detail on Templar abuse. The way she would rather be killed than call for help is... well.

Ch 2: The intent of this chapter was to position the mages as adversaries of the Templars despite the fact that they are not on even ground. Classic Bioware.

Ch 3: So the Templars took away the only tools for peaceful change and use the violent means of change they resort to as a way to crack down on the mages? How realistic.

Ch 4: Nothing more embarrassing than getting caught hurling lightning balls at nothing in the ancient bowels of the Tower

Ch 5: MOMMY RESPECTABILITY POLITICS?

Ch 6: Lord Seeker Lambert really busted into Evangeline’s room while she was changing because he thought he saw a ghost? kgbdfefd

Ch 7: The ‘mages have it better in the tower’ chapter

Ch 8: Who would’ve guessed that venturing out alone in the middle of the night in a place teeming with darkspawn might be dangerous? Not Rhys apparently.

Ch 9: Adamant Fortress? Non-binary legend ShALE??

Ch 10: EWW.

Ch 11: You know, I remember the Archdemon battle being a lot tougher than that Wynne

Ch 12: The power of funky little spirits I guess

Ch 13: You know what that is? It’s beginning the healing process.

Ch 14: Imshael would love this chapter, which is fortunate since he’s just out roaming Orlais by now

Ch 15: Now here’s the Cole we know and love

Ch 16: intricate rituals, subtle manipulations, and machinations my beloved < 3

Ch 17: good and bad apples, neoliberal complacence, and slippery slope fallacies my beloathed </3 

Ch 18: FUCK THE DIVINE DJFJFCHZSDKSDKLHE

Ch 19: So the Seekers of Truth framed a mage for several murders in an attempt to maintain Templar control over the mages? Certainly explains why the Templars don’t like them because they think the Seekers are a check on Templar control huh.

Ch 20: Very sexy of Evangeline and Wynne to destroy all of the Phylacteries I must say

Ch 21: Well not all the Phylacteries I suppose. Poor Cole though

Ch 22: SO HE JUST BECOMES AN AEQUETARIAN AFTER ALL THAT????

Epilogue: aha bitch

tl;dr: This book details the beginning of the Mage-Templar War that the Inquisitor resolves in Dragon Age Inquisition. It starts with the discovery that the Rite of Tranquility can be reversed, and is not due to Anders’ actions.

Thoughts: I disliked all but one character in this entire book and he ended up dead by the end of it. Wynne is also very dead in my canon worldstate. The plot itself was interesting enough for me to blast through the entire book in three days however. That being said, I’d say that if you only read one book in the series, make it Asunder because the plot is just so important to the games.

The start of the Mage-Templar war is so more complicated than the game implies, and it’s a shame that the game does so poor a job at explaining it. The games do love lowering the stakes of the books however, and this is not the first time that’s happened. Gaider has once again shoved in a weird and lukewarm heterosexual romance in the book that no one wanted, so that’s there. Idk. The characters were all weird I don’t know what to say. Also this book was in need of some serious trimming. There were so many erroneous scenes that weren’t even close to being important. Like Wynne’s super special evil staff that got broken in 30 seconds because she tried to kill Cole.

[byanyan]

@xaallo replied to your post “local punkass teen stands in ur way fight ...”:

sit on them like a really big dog

​

[theepisceswriter]

300 MILESTONE WRITING EVENT. (CLOSED, BUT REGULAR REQUESTS ARE OPEN)

OMG HI BESTIES, I recently gained 300 besties and I can’t even begin to tell y’all how thankful I am for all the love and support all of you have given me in this short amount of time that I’ve owned my blog. I thought I was going to be a flop lowkey but you all proved me wrong LMAO. So to show my appreciation for you all, I decided to finally do a milestone event like I was supposed to do a long time ago but shhhhh, don’t be shy to send in a request bestie! I promise I don’t bite unless you know you’re into that kind of stuff 🙈 

MASTERLIST (tba once the first requests is complete or I get a couple of requests) 

 HOW THIS EVENT WILL WORK 

♡ listed below underneath the readmore cut are 90 prompts  for you to choose from that are broken into categories (fluff, smut, angst, & crack) 

♡ You can send in one prompt or mix and match them together along with a character of your choice, two characters for a ménage a trois situation if you want to be extra, or a character x character request 

♡ You can be as descriptive or as vague as you want with your request. 

♡ For example: “prompt number 13 (or the prompt by itself) + prompt 31 for Jean & scout!reader after he thinks you’ve died while in a battle but the two of you reunite later on” or just “Prompt 19 for Shigure Sohma” and even request who you want to say the prompt!

♡ In return I’ll write you a drabble based off the request that varies from 500-1k words. 

Requests specifically for this milestone event are open until 04/25/21 or until I say they close because I’m lowkey terrible at putting a time restriction on things. 

 WHAT FANDOMS THIS EVENT IS OPEN TO 

♡ ATTACK ON TITAN 

♡ JUJUTSU KAISEN 

♡ BLEACH 

♡  FRUITS BASKET 

♡  DEVILS LINE 

♡  FIRE FORCE 

♡  DEATH NOTE 

♡  JOJO’S BIZARRE ADVENTURE 

And any other animes/mangas mentioned in my rules post, even the ones in my currently reading/watching list, but the ones listed up above are the main ones.

PROMPTS LIST 

 FLUFF 

1. " hey, so... i know you haven't been feeling great, so i picked up a few of your favorite snacks, drinks... "

2.“ wait , did you just say you love me? “

3." it's okay. i promise you, i will be here when you wake up. "

4." wow... you look... you look amazing. "

5." you're shivering. here, take my jacket. "

6. “ i love you. “

7. “ what? ME have a crush on YOU? whaaaaaat?! haha! what? pfft … shut up! “

8.“ jealous?! i’m not jealous! “

9.“ wow … your smile is breathtaking. “

10.“I want to be more than friends. “

11.“ let me take you out on a date. “

12. “   it  seems  that  you  get  impossibly  more  beautiful  every  single  day .   ”

13.“ so … do i get a goodnight kiss? “

14. “   i  notice  that  you  keep  looking  at  my  lips .   you’re  criminally  unsubtle .   ”

15. “   i  think  the  kids  are  awake  …   ”

16. “   i  ran  you  a  bath .   get  in  it .   ”

17. “   there’s  no  greater  blessing  than  looking  at  my  child   &   seeing  your  eyes .   ”

18. “   let’s  just  get  in  the  car   &   drive  somewhere .   anywhere .   ”

19. “   i  just  can’t  believe  that  you’re  mine ,   now .   ”

20. “   no ,   you’re  not  going  anywhere .   you  have  a  fever .   ”

21. “   every  time  i  wake  up   &   you’re  there  next  to  me ,   i  wonder  if  i’m  still  dreaming .   ”

22. “  i think i might be in love with you.  ”

23. “ i love you, every part of you. even the parts you don’t like. ”

24. “  you know, if you moved in we wouldn’t keep having to say goodbye like this.  ”

25.“Come watch the sunset with me.”

 SMUT 

26. “i’ve been waiting all day…”

27. “can i come yet? Please let me cum.”

28. “you have to be quiet if you want to cum.”

29.“ wow … you’re hot when you’re angry. “

30. “i want you to touch yourself for me.”

31. “just shut up and fuck me.”

32. “i’m gonna fuck you until you beg me to stop.”

33. “i want you to forget everything and everyone else but me.”

34. “make me.”

35. “they’re gonna catch us—”

36. “You’re beautiful when you’re all flushed and wanting.”

37. “You can be rough with me, I won’t break.”

38. “Did you touch yourself, thinking of me?”

39. “Please, please, touch me.”

40. “I want to bury my face between your thighs.”

41. “You can beg better than that, I think.”

42. “Ride me. Slowly, that’s it.”

43. “Come taste yourself on my fingers.”

44. “are you gonna be good for me?”

45. “did you just yawn?”

46. “how much do you want to cum?”

47. “you sound so pretty when you moan”

48. “tell me you’re mine”

49. “I’m going to put a baby in you tonight.”

50. “Is this your first time doing anything?”

ANGST 

51.“ please just … leave me alone. “

52. “ i don’t love you. “

53.“  you don’t have to talk, we can just sit together.  ” 

54. “ stop trying to fix me.  ”

55. “  you’re right, you are a monster.  ”

56. “  loving you is killing me. ”

57.  “ you’re bleeding! ”

58. “  why can’t i be enough? ”

59. “  just stay still. let me hold you. ”

60. “  if you’re so intent on going down this path, then i’m coming with you. ”

61. “  i miss the way you used to smile at me. ”

62. “  i need to know that you’ll be okay. if something happens to me… ”

63. “  why won’t you just let me go? i’m not worth it. ”

64. “  please don’t go. ”

65. “There are more lives at stake here than the ones you care about! What gives you the right to decide that one person’s life weighs more than countless others?”

66. “I miss the old you.”

67.“I wish we knew each other sooner.”

68. “  even when you smile, your eyes are still sad.  ”

69. “Promise me you’ll find me in our next lifetime.”

70. “ don’t do that— don’t shut down on me. let me in.  ”

71. “ why aren’t you scared of me?  ”  

72. “ would you kill for me?  ”

73. “  i don’t like the way they look at you. perhaps i’ll cut their eyes out.  ”

74. “  yes. i killed them— but i did it for you.  ”

75. “I think I’m pregnant.”

 CRACK

76." what in the actual fuckily duckily. "

77." how do they know an animal is extinct like?? you looked everywhere?? "

78." why is it called creepypasta and not fettucine afraido? "

79." no offense to myself but what the fuck am i actually doing. "

80.“ … why does this card say ‘ happy 3rd birthday ‘? “

81." ted just be letting anyone talk. "

82." i wonder when the bermuda triangle stopped working. not a lot of drama there anymore. "

83." no wonder the ice caps are melting, i'm fucking HOT! "

84. “crying is very punk,  trust me,  i do it all the time  and i am a punk.  ”

85. “your inability to learn complicated handshakes is tearing this friendship apart.  ”

86. “  what do you mean a thesaurus isn’t a dinosaur? ”

87. “  i’m not interested in being polite or heterosexual.  ”

88.“It’s probably the Illuminati anyways.”

89. “ you’re lucky you’re cute. ”

90. “ Might just headbutt the wall and knock myself the fuck out.”

91. “You deserves the world but all i can give you is my anxiety and depression.”

[arcticdementor]

An unlikely thing happened to me on my two weeks’ off. I watched an HBO Max miniseries that mocked some aspects of wokeness.

Mike White’s “The White Lotus” is a tragicomic exposé of our current moneyed elites and the psychological dysfunction they labor so mightily under. There’s a blithe, unthinking finance jock, with a worked-out bod, an uneasy new wife, and a shitload of money, who can muster misery at the slightest ruffle in perfection. There’s the beta male, married to the mega-rich corporate CEO wife, worried about the condition his balls. There’s the super-uptight gay manager, hanging on to sobriety, as he performs for his clients; the mega-wealthy, overweight lost soul, played by Jennifer Coolidge, whose life is a pampered abyss of emotional desolation; and an aspiring young journalist who reconciles herself to money and indolence over a mindless career of clickbait snark.

…

And the most repellent characters are two elite-college sophomores, Olivia and Paula, packed to the gills with the fathomlessly entitled smugness that is beginning to typify the first generation re-programmed by critical theory fanatics. You watch as they casually abuse and denigrate their brother — a young man consumed by living online; you see how they mock anyone who doesn’t meet their exacting standards of youth or beauty; you watch them betray and lie to each other; you see them condescend to someone still struggling to pay back student loans (see the clip above); and you witness the co-ed of color, Paula, act out her antiracist principles, with disastrous real world results for a Hawaiian she thinks she is saving from oppression. She leaves her wreckage behind, gliding away, with impunity, to another semester of battling racism.

At one point, in a memorable scene, as the white daughter expounds about the evil of white straight men, her mother points out that she is actually talking about her brother, sitting at the same table. An individual person. Right next to her. Someone she might even love, if such a thing were within her capacity. Someone who cannot be reduced to a demonized version of his unchosen race and heterosexuality. And the only character one can bond with, and root for, is indeed this young white American male, awkward but genuine, whose story ends with a new bond with his dad, an escape from online addiction, and a newly revitalized human life.

“The White Lotus” is not an anti-woke jeremiad. It’s much subtler than that. Even the sophomores seem more naïve and callow than actively sexist and racist. The miniseries doesn’t look away from the staggering social inequality we now live in; and gives us a classic white, straight, male, rich narcissist in the finance jock. But it’s humane. It sees the unique drama of the individual and how that can never be reduced to categories or classes or identities.

And this step toward humaneness is what interests me. Because if we can’t intellectually engage people on how critical theory is palpably wrong in its view of the world, we can sure show how brutal and callous it is — and must definitionally be — toward individual human beings in the pursuit of utopia. “The White Lotus” is thereby a liberal work of complexity and art.

…

Applebaum’s Atlantic piece is a good sign from a magazine that hired and quickly purged a writer for wrong think, and once held a town meeting auto-da-fé to decide which writers they would permanently anathematize as moral lepers.

Similarly, it was quite a shock to read in The New Yorker a fair and empathetic profile of an academic geneticist, Kathryn Paige Harden, who acknowledges a role for genetics in social outcomes. It helps that Harden is, like Freddie DeBoer, on the left; and the piece is strewn with insinuations that other writers on genetics, like Charles Murray, deny that the environment plays a part in outcomes as well (when it is clear to anyone who can read that this is grotesquely untrue). But if the readers of The New Yorker need to be fed distortions about some on the right in order for them to consider the unavoidable emergence of “polygenic scores” for humans, with their vast political and ethical implications, then that’s a step forward.

…

And then, in the better-late-than-never category, The Economist, the bible for the corporate elite, has just come out unapologetically against the Successor Ideology, and in favor of liberalism. This matters, it seems to me, because among the most zealous of the new Puritans are the boards and HR departments of major corporations, which are dedicated right now to enforcing the largest intentional program of systemic race and sex discrimination in living memory. Money quote: “Progressives replace the liberal emphasis on tolerance and choice with a focus on compulsion and power. Classical liberals conceded that your freedom to swing your fist stops where my nose begins. Today’s progressives argue that your freedom to express your opinions stops where my feelings begin.”

The Economist also pinpoints the core tenets of CRT in language easy to understand: “a belief that any disparities between racial groups are evidence of structural racism; that the norms of free speech, individualism and universalism which pretend to be progressive are really camouflage for this discrimination; and that injustice will persist until systems of language and privilege are dismantled.” These “systems of language and privilege” are — surprise! — freedom of speech and economic liberty. If major corporations begin to understand that, they may reconsider their adoption of a half-baked racialized Marxism as good management. Maybe that might persuade Google not to mandate indoctrination in ideas such as the notion being silent on questions of race is “covert white supremacy,” a few notches below lynching.

…

And then there’s a purely anecdotal reflection, to be taken for no more than that: all summer, I’ve been struck by how many people, mostly complete strangers, have come up to me and told me some horror story of an unjust firing, a workplace they’re afraid to speak in, a colleague who has used antiracism for purely vindictive or careerist purposes, or a hiring policy so crudely racist it beggars belief. The toll is mounting. And the anger is growing. The fury at CRT in high schools continues to roil school board meetings across the country. Some Americans are not taking this new illiberalism on the chin.

This isn’t much, I know. Read Peter Boghossian’s resignation letter from Portland State University to see how deep the rot has gotten. But it’s something. It’s a sign that there is now some distance from the moral panic of mid-2020 and the start of reflection upon the most zealous aspects of this new illiberalism.

[chcnce]

guess the TWENTY FOUR YEAR OLD OCTOBER baby just arrived to dallyeog! it makes sense, because HWA YOHAN / CHANCE HWA  is just as CRISP as the month of OCTOBER. wait, why do they remind me of BANG CHAN? beyond that, they seemed RELIABLE AND PASSIONATE upon first glance. i heard someone say they’re sort of SELF-CONSCIOUS AND CAUTIOUS though. i hope they get acquainted here in COMPLEX # 4 / APARTMENT # 1 / FLOOR # 2 ; HE seem(s) to have a lot going on with HIS job as STREAMER.

hi! i’m lu and i’m really happy to present to you to my mess of a son. he’s certainly a hard pill to swallow but he’s not as bad once you get to interact with him. chance is his real english name, but also the persona he’s crafted to remain popular and relevant to the masses. he’s blunt and brutally honest, but mostly when he’s streaming. all in all: a whole ass mess, i insist.

without further ado, here are his basic stats, a trivia and wanted connections under the cut. however you can find his background and plots linked accordingly ( i’ll add other pages eventually ). i’m really fine with talking either here or discord, so whichever works fine for you, works fine for me too! i’ll be reaching to everyone go gives this a like soon enough <3

basic information

― full name: hwa yohan / chance hwa ― nicknames: yohwa ― age: twenty four ― date of birth: october 3rd, 1996 ― birthplace: cheonan, south korea. ― hometown: sydney, australia ― current location: seoul, south korea ― living arrangements: dallyeog / complex # 4 / apartment # 1 / floor # 2 ― ethnicity: korean ― nationality: dual, korean (natural born) and australian (naturalized) ― gender: cis male ― pronouns: he / him ― orientation: demiromantic, heterosexual. ― religion: atheist ― occupation: streamer ― language(s) spoken: korean (fluent), english (fluent) ― accent: heavy australian accent

physical appearance

― faceclaim: bang chan / christopher bang of stray kids. ― hair: naturally brown, though he often dyes to a variety of colors, mostly black and blue. right now, it’s a purple color that’s already fading. ― eye colour: coffee brown ― height: 171cm ― weight: 56kg ― tattoos: none at the moment. ― piercings: lobe and upper lobe on both ears. anti-tragus, orbital and rook on the left one. double helix on the right one. ― clothing style: regularly techwear when he goes out and athleisure at home.

personality

― label: the cynical ― positive traits: attentive, dependable, reliable, passionate, brave, energetic, honest, humorous, clever, versatile, truthful, affectionate, sociable ― negative traits: self-conscious, cautious, opinionated, arrogant, detached, critical, tactless, stubborn, loud, quick-tempered, harsh, unfiltered, cynical, restless, ambitious, ― hobbies: baking, collecting enamel pins and funkos, jigsaw puzzles, skateboarding, reading, listening to music, curating playlists when he has time, learning origami. ― habits: obsessively organising, borrowing books and rarely ever returning them (he forgets who they belong to ok), really bad road rage, awful at keeping track of time, people watching, always wears a black ring on his left index finger, always hugs something when sleeping, gets easily impressed by things, quotes movies and shows in regular conversations, knuckle cracking, snacking between meals, eye rolling without noticing, squinting when concentrated, crossing his arms over his chest, running hands through his hair, slouching, rolling his shoulders. ― zodiac sign: sun libra, moon gemini, ascendant libra. ― mbti: infp-t “the mediator” ― enneagram: 8w7 “the nonconformist”. ― temperament: melancholic ― hogwarts house: ravenclaw ― moral alignment: chaotic neutral ― primary vice: greed ― primary virtue: diligence ― element: air

trivia:

― he’s played all kind of games and his twitch channel was created 9 years ago (whew) and it currently has over 5 million subscribers. currently, he streams mostly genshin impact, valorant, league of legends, overwatch, spider-man: miles morales, cyberpunk 2077 and the witcher iii. every now and then he makes charity streams. he also makes special lives with other gamers and figures where they play games like among us, minecraft, fortnite (though he absolutely hates it), party animals, fall guys and other party games. ― despite the rumours around him and his parents, he’s never talked about them to the media. it’s not like chance hides the information, after all it’s online, but he swerves questions about them and pretty much decides to not say anything about them just to avoid controversy. his parents didn’t mind until last year the company they worked at offered him a sponsorship and yohan turned it down. it’s safe to say they were pretty hurt over this and they haven’t talked much recently. ― yohan is, in his words, the biggest fan of spiderman (not really) but he’s his favorite heroe of all times and he collects everything and anything that has him in it. his biggest collection is funko pops with over 30+ figurines. he collects funkos of various other interests of him as well as enamel pins. ― lowkey a weeb. he likes watching anime in his spare time and if he likes it too much, he’d buy the manga and read it as well. his latest obsessions are kimetsu no yaiba, boku no hero academia, haikyu and jujutsu kaisen. ― won’t ever admit this out loud, but almost every ghibli movie makes him cry his eyes out, even when he’s watched the same one over and over again. he prefers to watch these on his own. his favorite one is grave of the fireflies. ― it took him a while to get used to korean culture, a part of him is still trying to. luckily, his family would speak in korean in their household most of the time and this helped him not struggle as much when it came to the language. his streams are most of the time in english to cater to a bigger audience, but recently he’s got himself a small team of an editor and a translator that’s helped him add subtitles to the videos he uploads in youtube. ― his current setup is completely sponsored except for a few extra things he’s bought himself and he has minimal experience when it comes to builds, though he’s really interested in learning and has recently researched more about the whole topic, hoping to get his first custom build by the end of the year. ― has terrible road rage and this is the reason why he doesn’t own a car or a driving license, even being in the backseat makes him anxious and would much rather prefer to use the bus, a bike or his skateboard to commute between places. taxis and other rides are his last option, if he’s quite honest. ― as a neighbour, he’s polite and tries to be mindful just to avoid needless problems. the first thing he did was soundproof his office in order to not disrupt others, but sometimes this doesn’t work as well due to how loud he can be. chance will try to greet every neighbour he encounters either with a wave or a simple nod. ― loves dogs but doesn’t feel he’s responsible enough to take care of one yet, though he will certainly volunteer to pet-sit his friends’ dogs.

wanted connections:

― life in seoul: he’s been wanting to start a podcast that has nothing to do with his main channel, aka a podcast about the culture in seoul from different perspectives, he wants to know about other people’s experiences. can be people that have lived all their life here or foreigners that, like himself, are pretty much new or can’t get enough of the city. it’d be a pretty chill podcast and anyone can participate! ― people that know about him and lowkey follow his streams (or just play them in the background while doing other stuff) ― or people that know about him but dislike him because he’s said stuff before about other public figures you’re a fan of. or he just simply rubs you the wrong way. ― people who absolutely hates when he streams late at night and he’s full on screaming at the screen (he tried to soundproof his streaming room but someone he can be way too loud, sorry) ― he’s always up for a good collaboration regardless of the topic: food, art, random tags and challenges. even if it's not up to his alley, he's likely to always say yes just for the laughs. ― the group of friends yohan met in different ways. they're not all strictly gamers, streamers or anything of the sort, but whenever they get together to play some games, it's a total chaos. and he wouldn't change it at all. ― the one person that always gets his packages delivered by mistake to your place instead of his. or the other way around. ― more: friends, enemies, a penpal, a platonic soulmate, workout buddies, etc.

[dontasktheradiodemon]

Tide Pools (1/6/2021)

Click here if you’re like “What the heck is this about?”

Alastor and Angel Dust @sluttyspiderpolkacock (and the same adorable baby featured here) hang out around a tide pool. Angel shares (with some coaxing) some of his worries re: Valentino following this little incident, and Alastor brainstorms with Angel possible ways to keep him safe—from adjusting his contract with Valentino to fleeing Pentagram City to getting an effective weapon that could take Valentino down a peg.

And the baby eats a crab.

(This is also where Angel gets access to the holy water that he uses here.)

Alastor

At long last, Alastor had finally gotten antsy enough to pull out his bathing suit and meander down to the beach to explore it properly. He’d found a little path right next to the ocean in the shade of the estate, and it had some tide pools he’d been examining with interest.

Unfortunately, being in the shade like this and having his arms and legs exposed to the breeze for the first time in decades meant he was chillier than he’d planned on. Detached from Hell as he currently was, he didn’t want to waste his energy warming himself. He wished he’d foregone the bathing suit and kept his coat...

Something billowy covered him up from above.

He jumped up and flipped it off with a startled trumpet sound effect, identified it as a coat, looked around, looked up, and looked back at the coat. Sure, that’d do.

He pulled it on, folded up the cuffs so they didn’t dangle over his hands, tied the two spare sleeves around his waist like a sash, and crouched down to study the tide pool again.

Angel

As the damned thing flew out of his sight, Angel gradually felt the ability to breathe return to his control. Deep breaths now. He could stay with Seapup a little longer. Gently, he threaded those chubby limbs through his spindly claws and pulled him to his fluff to warm him. Happy thoughts now... little sleepy Veci burbles... waves crashing against the rocks - - -

**And a loud, sudden TRUMPET.**

Pelagios started to stir. Then, mouth scrunched up before all four eyes popped open, he began to cry.

" _OHNONONOOO!_ " Angel cooed with a gather of the orange ball into his arms, " It's ok! I'm here! I'm SORRY, MIO BAM_BINO!_ Back ta sleep? Can ya sleep? Fa me? C'mon, let's go back to sleep. " He then rolled to his side and got up to pace the room, lightly bouncing and swaying the baby Veci to try and get him to calm. " Water? Ya wanna see the water, Baby? Yeah? Ok, let's go see what the jazz band's all about, ok? "

Smiling and making faces, Angel made his way to the balcony and perched himself over the edge to give Pelagios a taste of the sea air. With a little swaying and some light humming, it seemed to work long enough for Angel to let himself peruse the view. Sea... sands... sunlight like glitter over the waves... tidepools...

" ... Alastor? " Catching sight of a figure wearing Valentino's coat almost gave him a HEART ATTACK, but piecing together the features of his local Radio Demon pulled the biggest sigh of relief from deepest recesses of his lungs. " What'cha doin' down there in... that? "

Alastor

Alastor looked up. "Oh, hello! I thought I remembered this coat! I think the better is question is what is *this* doing down here with *me*?" He straightened up. Check out that snazzy 1920s swimsuit. Complete with skirt. "I appreciate that it didn't have *you* in it this time, but how many times do you plan to assault me with this coat?"

Angel

" _As many times as it takes fa ya t' learn ya lesson,_ " he teased darkly before laughing and shaking his head, " They were both accidents! Like this one! _Say ' hi ' to Uncle Alastor ~_ " Angel then tilted little Pelagios towards him. Too sleepy to do much more than yawn, Angel wagged a finger beneath his paw to mimic a wave. " I was just, uh, swingin' around. Practicin' m'coat flingin'. Y'know, job stuff! And got a lil' carried away! "

His ability to lie was getting worse and worse. He couldn't even look him in the eye and instead smiled off into the sky.

" Suits ya, though! Just ya color an' e'rythin'. Go ahead an' keep an eye on it so it doesn't get the better a ya again, yeah? "

Alastor

"Unfortunately for us all, I'm utterly incorrigible! You'll have to spent the whole trip pelting me with clothing."

*Uncle Alastor.* He wasn't sure he liked the sound of that when it was in reference to some stranger's baby. But he endured it with grace and dignity.

"Coat flinging. Really." Do you hear his skepticism. "I suppose there's a precise technique to it, is it. Minute differences in the wrist flick that communicate different forms of sexual desirability."

Angel

" Yeah! Totally! Look. " Perfectly balanced upon the railing, Angel extended a limp wrist and an immaculately straight leg in a striking pose. " _Queer..._ " He then shifted into bent arms and legs. Reek that raw masculinity. " _Drinks nothin' but beer!_ "

In a fit of laughter, he drew his knees back together and tossed his chin to the sky. Pelagios didn't seem to find it worth acknowledging, but Angel thought he was hilarious and doing an _exceptional_ job.

" Dunno what I was goin' for, but it did _somethin'_, didn' it? Look at'cha, all cozy ~ " He then leaned over his knees with the sincerest espression since the start of the conversation. " So ya just out explorin' ? "

Alastor

Uh-huh. Alastor kept giving Angel a skeptical look. "And I suppose you do many shows where you're called upon to strip while acting as aggressively heterosexual as possible."

He perked up at the question. "Yes! I found crabs!" He pointed at the tide pool. "They look *exactly* like Earth crabs."

Angel

" I used t' be a HIT at bachelorette parties, MIND YA! " he insisted snarkily before swiveling his hips off the balcony and dropping down, a slumbering Seapup still in tow. He then walked up to the pools and copped a curious squat.

" Oh shit, y'ain't kiddin'... " Angel mused with a lean almost too far. Perhaps the scent of fresh food riled him, as Pelagios _immediately_ bounded off his chest and dove straight for a crab. Eyes blew wide and multiple sets of arms flailed in a panic to keep him from falling in and dampening his fluff.

Alastor

An announcer’s recorded voice rang out, “*And they’re off!*” Ding ding ding! A crowd roared in excitement! Alastor leaned in to watch the seapup go after the crabs. Angel can look after himself, this is way more interesting.

Angel

Angel scanned the contents of the pool with hawk - like precision. Nothing seemed too nefarious, especially not up against Pelagios happily burbling on fresh crab guts, triumphantly circling the pool on his back like an otter. He exhaled his held breath and fell back.

" Jesus fucking christ... " he wheezed, " He was OUT COLD all but TWO SECONDS AGO! " Oh he is _BEAT._

Alastor

“Look at him taking his victory lap! What a champion!” Alastor leaned forward to grin down at the seapup. “You’re a vicious little killer, aren’t you? Well done!” If he had been worried for Pelagios’s safety, he sure wasn’t showing it.

Angel

A big, grinning face! The little veci copied it as best as his his little jaws could and propelled his tail towards Alastor's perch. He knew praise when he heard it and was beginning to learn that sharing was caring. So he offered a couple legs, waving them both in his chubby paws like flags.

Alastor

"Is that for me!" He plucked the legs out of seapup's hands. "Why, thank you very much! Quite hospitable of you." He offered one to Angel and crunched down straight on the other, like some kind of freak who eats crab shells, Alastor what's wrong with you. "I hope these aren't toxic! Want one?"

Angel

Angel peered over his fluff and sat up just as Pelagios turned tail to playfully harass another crustacean of some sort. " The fuck're you - ? " He rose a brow but nonetheless took the crab leg and started taking it apart. " Ya... supposed t' eat the fuckin' SHELL? It'd be a lil easier to think you can chomp on, uh, GRASS, but crab shells?? Ya can TAKE THAT?  "

Alastor

“You’re not *supposed* to, no. But it’s very satisfying!” Crunch, crunch, crunch. Enrichment. “... I probably shouldn’t swallow it, though.” Don’t mind him as he spits the pieces back out. Never take this man to a fancy restaurant.

Angel

He laughed out loud. " Yeah? Ya THINK? " he responded through giggles, half teasing, half validating. He then pulled the meat and returned the shell so Alastor could have his fun, " Don't choke, ok? Wouldn't wanna be givin' ya ribs another poundin' so soon. "

Alastor

“Don’t lie, you’re just waiting for another excuse!” Crunch. ... Crunch. All right, it stopped being satisfying. Once the novelty and shock value wore off, it didn’t really have much to offer. He tossed the rest of the leg into the tide pool.

Angel

" Now ya just bein' ridiculous ~ " he said dramatically with a fish through the tidepool, " I can deal a beatin' whenever I want, AND get paid t' do it. I don't NEED to be settin' anythin' up fa YOU. "

He then pulled something out. A sponge. A big one. _Definitely wider than Alastor's throat._ And a big, mischievous grin to go with it. " Bet'cha can't swallow this whole ~ " he joked with a crack of his neck as if to ready himself for the pounce.

Alastor

“Sure, but it wouldn’t be a beating for *me,* would it? It wouldn’t be half as satisfying for you!”

He eyed the sponge critically. “Hm... No, probably not!” Bait not taken. That thing didn’t look the *least* bit edible.

Angel

" Kiddin'! I was KIDDIN'! " he assured with a toss of the sponge back into the pool, " Ya really thought I was gonna shove this salty thin' down ya - ? "

And Pelagios volleyed it back, saturated with sea water. It deflated flatly against the side of his head and emptied enough water to drench him with. Hello, karma.

Alastor

The studio audience laughed obnoxiously.

Smiling politely and totally ignoring Angel's plight, he said, "No, I didn't—but I'm not putting it past you to hope I'd shove it down my *own* throat."

Angel

Angel raked his wet bangs off his face and rolled his eyes. It probably wasn't very noticible, but all eight went. " Tsk, even if ya DID call my bluff, I wouldn't 'ave LET YA. I wouldn't do ya like THAT! I wouldn' even let ya SELF, _do ya like that._ "

Alastor

“I’d like to see you try to stop me!” As a reward for misbehavior, Alastor plucked another tiny crab out of the pool and offered it to the seapup. Here, kid, you earned it.

“So! I’ve been just *dying* to find out—why the delayed arrival? Didn’t you have work?”

Angel

" That was the whole joke! " Angel exclaimed with a wringing of his hair as Pelagios happily crunched the crab and started playing with the legs.

A rich, sea breeze coursed over the pools and followed the shiver down his spine. " I did, " he said simply, " Then changed my mind. Big V didn' stop me. " Basically the truth, omitting the fact that he'd _tried_ to stop him.

Alastor

“Really? The kind of taskmaster who has his employees working on Christmas?” Alastor quirked an eyebrow. “Didn’t stop you, or didn’t have an opportunity to stop you?”

Angel

He leaned back on his hands and crossed his legs, eyes narrow and subtly flickering in his direction from the sides. " ... _Yeah - !_ " The reply came in a curt exhale. " He could'a stopped me if he wan'ed to. Ya really think I could ever get the better of a brass like 'im if he 'ad anythin' t' say about it? "

Alastor

“Now, that’s a careful question. Do I think you could get the better of him if he had something to say about it? No. Do I think you could get the better of him *without* giving him a chance to say something about it and then decide what to do when you get back? Possibly.” Alastor had been wondering about the abruptness of Angel’s arrival. And he didn’t know a lot about Valentino—had never *cared* to learn much about him—but he suspected Valentino kept a tight leash on Angel’s diet, even more strongly suspected Valentino took more than his fair share of Angel’s earnings, and didn’t-even-have-to-suspect at least a couple of the gross indignities Valentino put his own business partner/lover through.

Maybe aside from a little obsession over nutrition and garden-variety unjust wages, everything was aboveboard; but it was enough to make Alastor suspicious of the idea that Valentino would willingly let his star employee go at the last minute during an extermination.

Angel

" WELL! Ain't YOU a SMA'T COOKIE! " he growled, " If ya think ya got me all figured out already, what's the poin' a askin', huh? Like hearin' yaself TALK? Get some sorta, OFF from makin' me out t' be some BITCH? " He'd twisted in Alastor's direction and raked a claw through the natural rock they were perched upon. A deep snarl twitched over the precious metal in his mouth. It was the most direct he'd been with him since arriving. And sudden, as if Alastor had abruptly shown in a secret, sacred place of his and made him scream.

" Well I ain't - ! " And he SNEEZED over his shoulder. Cold breeze, wet fur, and his high body temperature started giving him the shakes, making his beligerence anything but threatening. Brows scrunching in annoyance, he held up a finger in pause, sneezed a couple more times, and stared blankly. " ... Fuck was I? " Train of thought? _Derailed._

Alastor

Oh, hit a nerve, had he? Very sweetly, Alastor said, “I believe you were in the process of lambasting me for implying you were someone’s b[*BEEP*].” Isn’t he helpful. “Which isn’t what I meant to imply at all! Only that the fact that you *took* a liberty doesn’t necessarily imply he willingly *gave* it!”

Alastor stood, untied his sleeve-sash, and shrugged off the coat so he could offer it back to Angel. He was wet and sneezing, he needed it more than Alastor. “I don’t think I’ve figured out anything! All I know is that you plummeted out of the ceiling and that three out of the scant four facts I know about your boss are synonyms for ‘he’s a control freak.’ The rest, I can only learn from you. I didn’t want to be so *direct* with my insinuations, but I was starting to worry that if we got much more *in*direct, I’d never solve this mystery.”

Angel

Eyes glued to the rock, Angel took the coat and threw it over his entire person like a tent. " Fine. I left wit'out permission. Ok? " he muffled from beneath the thick velvet mass, " I couldn' do another night, 'specially not that one. 'Aight? Ya satisfied wit' 'at? Ya mystery solved, Prancy Drew? "

The bump started to shrink as he drew in his knees and curled into himself. He wasn't lying when he said he thought Alastor was smart, but it started to _worry_ him how _transparent_ he really was while he strived to draw an iron curtain around his occupational ( personal ) life.

Alastor

“Really? Prancy Drew? I would have gone for Sherlock Hooves, personally!” A light laugh. Ahhh, he shoulda been a comedian.

“That covers act one!” He crouched down again. “What worries me more is act two. What happens when we go back?”

Angel

" Not buppidy enough, " he replied monotonously before falling silent a few beats, " ... ... ... I dunno. I... didn' plan it. I don't even... " ~~Know if I CAN go back.~~ " I dunno. I'll... figure it out later - "

The mass grew a couple inches. " The fuck are _you_ worried about? This ain' got nothin' t' be doin' wit' you. "

Alastor

“You dare accuse *me* of being *worried*?” He planted a hand on his chest, scandalized. “Anyway, I could have asked you the same after you hauled me from the bar to your room! You owe me this one! Or I owe you one, whichever direction this thing goes.”

And Alastor was worried it *might* have something to do with him. If Valentino decided he needed to come confront his wayward worker—and if Charlie expected Alastor to be the one blocking the front door.

Angel

" They was ya exact words! " the bump exclaimed comically with a visible lean towards him, " I told ya, it didn' FEEL RIGHT t' leave ya in the middle a the hotel like a bump on a log, yeah? That's just _decency_ where I'm from. You don't gotta... "

Angel swallowed thickly as he tried to wrap his head around _whichever direction._ Was he looking to pay it forward? Simply get even in the transactional sense? The latter sounded more like him. The notion that he wanted the satisfaction in turn for doing someone a favor felt like it was _completely_ off the table, so they likely weren't going _there..._

_And his head started to spin._ " ... Ya don't gotta worry about m'boss... or my job... Ya already bought me some hours... That's... good... " _**SNIFFLE.**_

Alastor

A pause. “You’re right! *I* accused me of being worried! I don’t know how I’ll recover from this betrayal.”

Oh, no, was Angel about to get emotional? Alastor hoped that sniffle was from the damp. “Oh... don’t give me the credit, you bought yourself these hours.” He attempted an awkward shoulder pat. “Unless you mean back on Christmas, sure, although I don’t think that has much to do with this situation—” His eyes brightened. “Say now, how’s that for an idea? Go back and claim that at the last minute you got paid better to be somewhere else, give him his cut, do you think that would make all this blow over? You’d have to tell me, I don’t know him.”

Angel

Angel gasped with a violent flinch upon contact, frantically drawing the coat from over him as if he were drowning. Not being able to see Alastor coming was a mistake, but through a shot of wide eyes, Angel insisted nothing untoward happened. He clenched the bundled material in his lap and anchored his sights to it, shaking his head solemnly.

" His call tops e'rythin'. He wants me somewhere, I don't get t' tell 'im I got a better idea. It don't - ... it doesn't work like that. N - ... _no amoun' a cash's gonna fix what I did._ "

Alastor

Alastor pulled his hand back and raised them both up, palms out. Okay, no touching.

So he was more power-hungry than money-hungry. Pity. But something about Angel's reply rubbed Alastor wrong. *Fix what I did.* That sounded less like a fear caused by what Valentino was like and more like a fear cause by what Angel had done—and that made Alastor wonder whether what he'd done was something worse than simply skipping out on a shift. "And... what *is* it that you did, exactly?"

Angel

He didn't know why, but seeing both Alastor's hands up made him deal a double high - five. _See? Touch is fine! I can TOTALLY do it JUST FINE! HUZZAH!_

But his eyes stayed low, corners of his mouth twitching. It was hard to tell if he was about to burst out laughing or crying. Claws closed over his cheek and he turned his head towards the sea, as if the words he were about to say were the ashes of his soul to be put to rest.

He mumbled, " I broke outta the top story window, let the angels in, crashed 'ere. 'Splains the glass. "

Alastor

Alastor actually laughed at the double high-five. Okay! Unexpected, but entertainingly so!

And then let out another sharp bark of a laugh at the confession, less out of amusement and more out of surprise. “Well! You know how to make an exit, don’t you! Maybe you’ll get lucky and the angels will take care of the problem for you, eh? But I wouldn’t bet money on it.”

Angel

His cheeks rose in a weak smile that reached his eyes and not much else. " No... the angels wouldn' get 'im... He'd throw all of us to 'em first. Bet all our lives b'fore we even get a chance t' take a count. " ~~_Basically what *I* did..._~~ Angel winced at the realization.

Alastor

“Oh, keep your fingers crossed—who knows, maybe he had fifty meat shields and the exterminator that gets in will have a quota of fifty-one sinners to meet!” But there are no lucky breaks in Hell.

“Do you know what you’re going to do when you get back?”

Angel

" Don't matter i got _six_ to cross... he's still gonna be there, for sure... Waitin' fa me... " He pawed at the mass of hearts in his lap, raking through them, attempting to disrupt their pattern but they remained.

" ... Lookin' fa me. I don't - ... I don't KNOW. I _can't_ go back, but... What 'appens to a Sinner outta Hell too long? You're a magic man. Ya can pick up shit runnin' through Heaven, yeah?? What's it look like? " By this point, he'd crawled over the coat and put a tentative hand on the rock beside his hoof, pleading at him for an answer that'd lead to his least painful existence.

Alastor

His smile turned sad, without his noticing. “I can detect signals from Heaven. I’ve never been able to figure out how to understand them.” He sighed. “But, I do know what happens to sinners outside of Hell: same thing that happens to any soul in the mortal realm. You’d be a ghost. For now, you’ve got enough energy from Hell to sustain a visible, physical form—but over time, it will run low. Once you’re out, you’ll be another intangible spirit, detectable by the average human only as a shadow or an eerie feeling unless you find a source of energy to leech off of and study how to channel it. Maybe it would be different here instead of Earth, with so much more magic around that’s easier to absorb, but that remains to be seen.”

A vague shrug. He could ask Alexander, once he got the hang of drawing power through his radio, whether he collected power more easily here than Earth; and when Sir Pentious started living here for longer periods of time, if he ever got up to weeks, months away from Hell, Alastor could ask about his energy and whether he had to do anything to sustain it; but right now there was too much unknown.

“But visitors to Earth, angelic and demonic alike, are always on the lookout for fugitives. Usually, they’re just souls who didn’t pass over. They’re hauled in to their respective afterlives and that’s the end of it. I don’t know what they’d do with escapees.”

Angel

Angel swallowed thickly. " _I couldn' do that..._ " he whispered lowly, " _I'm too fuckin'... STUPID t' read through all that technical... spiritual... SHIT...!_ " Surely that wasn't the reason, despite how unintuitive it'd be for him. It was moreso his own frustration talking. His lack of tact. His inability to fully consider the consequences of his actions. Not to mention, REALIZE what he was doing until he'd already DONE IT. His instincts had protected his immediate future, but DOOMED him in the long haul.

" So I'd just... go back... no matter what... I can't just be ghostin' fo'ever... "

He melted into the ground, two sets of claws masking his face and wrenching through his hair. If he couldn't escape any kind of persecution, he'd take his chances with the angels... " No one... who's rumbled with the angels ever came back, huh...? " If Extermination Day was going to be his LAST, there's so MUCH he would've done ( most of which included hunting down all the people he already wanted to KILL, but nonetheLESS... )

" So that's it. Hide out 'ere until the angels find me. Take me back. Do whatever they're gonna do t' me. That's all I can do not to 'ave ta... _face 'im._ "

Alastor

“If it helps, I don’t think ghosts are given a how-to manual, and most of them get the hang of it.” But what did he know, he’d never been a ghost.

Alastor grimaced at that. “Well. No one who’s ever been executed by an angel has ever been *un*-executed. But people have survived close calls.”

He settled himself more comfortably, they were going to be here a while. “The way I see it, you have several options. One—“ ding, “—hide on Earth as a ghost. Some ghosts get away with it for centuries. Again, I don’t know if escapees are given higher priority than souls that have never left the mortal realm—but I’ve never met an imp who was *enthusiastic* about hauling in wayward souls.

“Two—“ ding, “—hide *here* as a ghost. Unless the powers that be *try* to hunt escapees on Okkylk—and if they were going to, we probably would have found out when Sir Pentious started spending nights here instead of Hell—angels and demons might never visit this planet. Why would they? It’s possible you could hide here indefinitely.

“Three—“ ding, “—hide in another ring of Hell. I have connections that can sneak sinners out of Pride. But being a sinner on the lam in another ring has its own perils, as you could imagine. I’ve turned back mid-trip if going forward meant putting myself in a position where I couldn’t walk back to Pride on my own two feet if I had to—I doubt you’d have that luxury.

“Four—“ ding, “—throw yourself on the mercy of somebody stronger than Valentino. If you happen to know any dukes who like to blow thousands on you and would be moved to tears by your terrible plight, now’s the time to dial them.

“Five—“ ding, “dye your fur, learn a new accent, change your identity, and go under cover.

“*Six—*” ding, “erase him before he can get his hands on you.

“And any of those could be combined to *great* effect with faking your own extermination. If you have any limbs you’re not fond of, all you’d have to do is toss one in a little pile of gore near where you were last seen!”

Angel

" I ain't gonna be taken by no fuckin' _IMP,_ " he grumbled, but seemed to relax some beneath the comforts of someone thinking for him when he had such shortened foresight. Slowly but surely, he started to remember who he was. " I ain't gonna _hide_ fo'ever either. I worked too fuckin' hard makin' m'name. If it'd all be fa nothin', I'd rather fuck off into extermination. "

Yet, the sternness of his words contradicted the shuddering, the fading pink of his bodily markings into the faintest grey.

" I know... some demons... but they're all either frien's a Big V's , or ain't gonna wanna make beef wit' 'im fa anythin'. Or care to if it's gonna mean they're losin' all the rest a his business. An' I'd be... in the same spot... caterin' to their e'erythin' an' if I don't - "

He stopped himself and curled up on his side.

" Madame... could... an' would, but she's got a deal wit' 'im I can't fuck with. I got a lot goin', but wit'out 'im I ain't got much t' bargain. He owns... ALL I got under contract. Everythin' but m'soul. "

Alastor

Everything but his soul. Alastor was silent a moment as he contemplated that, staring out over the ocean. Finally, he said, “Greedy. You wanted to have everything and you wanted it as fast as possible, didn’t you?” His tone wasn’t scolding.

“What are the terms of your contract? Any buy-back provisions, any terms under which it would immediately become void?”

Angel

" No... it was... slow... " he responded with an evasive weakness, " Yeah, I've always wanted t' be a star. Since I was human. But when I first dropped 'ere, I was... _fine._ Doin' what I was doin'. Workin' bars, streets, weapons. Until he showed me I could be more. An' I believed 'im when he said we was gonna be a _team._ "

He trailed off.

" I trusted 'im. Wit' everythin'. _And he wrung me the FUCK OUT fa E'ERYTHIN' I got._ There's... no way out. He 'ad me agreein' t' shit I shouldn't've. The way he talks an' the things he does... It's what he does. He can get ya agreein' t' anythin' he wants wit' just, a flick of his DAMN WRIST until he's covered all 'is bases. An' ya can't fight 'im anymore. Ya _belong_ to 'im, whether ya want to or not. 'Cause at the time he had ya noddin', everythin' just sounded... good. No fine print. It's ya whole _ass_ in bold. "

Alastor

“And who could pass up such a temptation.” It was damn foolish to trust anyone like that in Hell. But everyone had a bit of a damn fool somewhere deep inside of them, and the cleverest manipulators only needed to find the right angle from which to pry that fool into the light. “Do you have a written copy of your contract? Or was it all verbal?”

Angel

" Not me... " He picked himself up just enough to be eye - level with him. " Not... you, " he dared with an implicit confession before sitting back. " He has it. " Of _course_ he does. " I haven't even seen the damn thing in decades. "

Alastor

He didn’t react to the implicit accusation—but he didn’t deny it.

A sigh. “And I’m sure so much as *asking* to see it will raise suspicions. Not, of course, that you could ask even if you wanted to, if you can’t go back.” Damn. Alastor was sure the thing must have loopholes—*everything* had loopholes—but he wasn’t going to figure out what if he couldn’t see the thing. “What about your soul? Why *haven’t* you sold it? Does your contract stipulate anything about what happens if you do?”

Angel

" I... I don't... r'member... I don't think he thinks I got the guts. It was the one thin' he let me keep t' keep me thinkin' I stood a chance. I don't even fuckin'... know what HAPPENS or what it feels like t' not 'ave ya soul. He got me this twisted up wit'out it. Givin' it away would do me worse, wouldn' it? "

Alastor

"It would depend entirely on who you give it away *to!* And, say, whether they might let you buy it back. Mind, most 'sell your soul now, buy it back later' deals are designed to make getting out of debt practically impossible, *but.* Infernal law favors dealmakers who work in souls. In most cases, selling one's soul trumps any prior ownership claims over any other part of one's person. But you'd know better than I whether Valentino drafted your contract with a clause ensuring he'd maintain his holdings even if you sold your soul."

Every word of it was the truth—but consider the source when considering whether this was actually good advice.

Angel

He almost zoned out. It made much more intuitive sense to just KILL the bastard in place of reading between any lines. Which was what he was working UP TO before he blew it.

A grimace. " I doubt it, but then again, I don't know. Guess I'd... gotta get it from 'im if I really wanna fin' out. " He was nearly stark white. He had to keep going no matter how much harder he ended up making it on himself. Hiding would only be prolonging the inevitable. If he was going to end up going down, at the very least he had to take Valentino with him, or strongarm _some_ sort of upper hand... somehow.

Alastor

"Which brings us right back to the problem of your having to face him, doesn't it?" And even if he could get out of his contract that way, that wasn't going to do a thing to stop Valentino from coming after Angel if he was mad his prisoner was getting away. It addressed a long-term problem but not the immediate one.

Angel

He couldn't speak, only shudder. Angel had _nothing_ over Valentino. He was near certain he carried his contract on his person at all times. It was really seeming like there _was_ no way around it. Just a nod. A bitten lip and raking claws over his forearms.

" Can ya... hear what they're broadcastin' about? "

Alastor

Alastor hesitated, then shook his head. "Not without somebody opening a portal to Hell. I picked up a little trick recently that might be able to boost my power enough to listen across planes like that, but I'm reluctant to test it out in the middle of an extermination and risk broadcasting our location."

Angel

" ... Ok, wouldn' want that... " Angel replied meekly before staggering a shaky reach into the pool to pluck Pelagios from a pile of coral he was rearranging. " Later... could ya tell me? " He then sank his face into the seapup's head, clutching him dearly as he replied with vaguely confused burbles.

Alastor

"As soon as I can." He smiled wanly. "You're not the only one eager for news out of Hell."

He was cold again. He summoned up a big beach towel from indoors, and offered a second one to Angel.

Angel

" Thanks... " First things first, he could stand to feel more like himself. Angel let Pelagios down into his crossed legs and started drying his hair. So long as he was stuck, getting his mind off the situation was the best he could do, for now. Diligently he dried and out of his line of sight, Pelagios had escaped him to chew on a corner of Alastor's towel.

Alastor

He could restrain the urge to chatter for a moment. Let Angel have a second to recover.

He looked at the seapup gnawing on the towel Alastor had draped over his shoulders. And then, slowly, without looking away from seapup, Alastor stuck the opposite corner in his mouth and started chewing it.

Angel

" If I could get my hands on my contract, would ya help me figure out a way t' - " Angel slipped the towel off his head, hair a weird, frizzy mess and snorted at the sight. " Sorry, Schnookums! Took ya outta the water before you were ready, huh? " he said as he reached for Pelagios and attempted to gently ease the towel from his mouth.

To no avail. It seemed he made his choice. A tidepool rich with toys and potential snacks was second to gnawing on cotton and staring down the Radio Demon with the biggest, most impish smile he could muster.

Alastor

Ah, so it was to be a battle, was it? Alastor leaned away from Pelagios, tugging lightly on the towel as he did.

"If you get it, I can look it over." Somehow, chomping on a towel did nothing to hamper his ability to speak clearly. "I can't guarantee that I'll find a way to help—it depends on just how airtight Valentino's made his contract—but I know a thing or two about Infernal law and I have fiends in high places."

Angel

The little orange veci hopped forward, easily tugged but no less determined to win... whatever the object of this battle was to be. He was rested from his food coma and had a wake - up snack. All that was left was energy to burn. A nefarious glint in his eye, Pelagios dug in on all fours and started crab - walking to the side to tighten the towel around Alastor's neck. _Ruthless._

Angel clamped a claw to his mouth to stifle a laugh. " Thanks, I... I 'ave no idea how I'm gonna pull it off, but... " He thought a little bit as Pelagios playfully death - rolled like an alligator. " I'll get it, and uh - " A loud pulse echoed in his eardrums. He was running on sheer force of will at this point. " - worse comes to worse. Which AIN'T gonna happen. But if it DOES, er... "

Nifty and Husk didn't seem to have it all that bad. Of course, they were vastly different demons and if anyone knew how severely false pretenses could be it'd be him, but he still couldn't finish the sentence. Angel still wasn't sure if bartering his soul would be something worth resorting to.

" ... I double die. End of story. Fat Nuggets is gonna be goin' to Kyxs. "

Alastor

Alastor patiently allowed seapup to strangle him—goodness, what an inventive tike. He was going to be dangerous if he ever faced anybody who actually needed to breathe.

But his gaze remained on Angel, waiting for him to finish that sentence—*knowing* what it would be. They'd danced around the topic of strategic soul-selling already, after all.

When Angel chickened out before he could offer his soul up, Alastor was relieved. Alastor couldn't save face if he turned down the offer—but accepting it would be tantamount to directly challenging Valentino for ownership of Angel. Even if Alastor could legally finagle the transfer, there would be nothing stopping Valentino—and his allies—from going after Alastor.

There were friends he would risk his existence for. Angel *was* a friend, Alastor would concede that, but he wasn't yet on the VIP list. Alastor didn't want to have to tell him *no, I can't go that far for you.*

He placed his hand to his heart. "You have my solemn word that Fat Nuggets will not be made into bacon." His hand was immediately bound against his chest by the towel. "Oh, clever boy."

Angel

" Thanks. 'Cause if ya don't... " Angel, visage all but a void, crawled forward and gently swept Pelagios before he could make a full predatory circle around Alastor. It was clear enough to him that he didn't _mind_ being wrapped and was... perhaps a bit _entertained._ But he needed something to do with his hands. And he had to make some preparations. " ... It ain't like there'd be anythin' I COULD DO ABOUT IT. "

A knead - like rub between the fins of his head, and the Seapup started up a series of contented burbling followed by a slack jaw. " I gotta... go talk to 'em, " he said with a swipe of his things as he stood, " Ya... want any company, or should I take the lil' fella with me? " With a spare pair of arms, he dusted out Valentino's coat and wrapped the towel around his waist. " I could... leave ya with this, too... if ya liked wearin' it. It's pretty cold back 'ere and would be better to have that towel to sit on instead of the rocks, ah? "

Alastor

“Very true! The best guarantee you could get is sticking around to keep me on the straight and narrow! But that’s never entirely in our control, is it?” A wink. “Still! You should do the best you can.” The closest Alastor is going to get to saying *I’d like you not to get erased.*

“Take him, you’d get far more out of his company than I would. But I’d appreciate the coat! I was starting to get attached to it!” He stood as well, it didn’t seem appropriate to keep talking while seated. Especially since he had something a little more serious to share. “Before you go, I’ve got something else you might find useful.”

Angel

Angel rose a brow, not the least bit in the mood for some empty pep talk. Nonetheless, he gave a small smile and floated the coat over Alastor's shoulders. " Knock y'self out. Nevermindin' the extra arms, it suits ya better than me. _Nice 'n red -_ "

He cut his sing - song and canted his head. " Yeah? Ontop a some contract literacy? " His upper arms dropped to his hips as Pelagios cradled into his stomach. " What'cha got? "

Alastor

“They make for a lovely sash!” He tugged the coat back on and wrapped the extra arms around his waist again.

Once he tied them on, he turned his full attention on Angel. In what for him passed as a low voice, he said, “Now, I’m trusting you to keep this information to yourself. I’m not a dealer in contraband and I’m not looking for customers, I just happen to have a private collection. *But*, I happen to have in my possession two barrels’ worth of holy water—and I can increase that amount exponentially at a moment’s notice. If adding that to your arsenal would help you solve any of your problems... consider it at your disposal.”

Angel

He matched his drop in volume. " _Ya shittin' me._ " Though Angel knew he wasn't kidding in the slightest. Rejecting any semblence of good news was simply just a hard habit to break. " Angel weapons ain't exactly standard issue. How the _fuck_ did'ja get ya han's on _**holy** water?_ It really work like that? It really...? " A dark glint circled his eyes. " _Burn_ like acid? _Permanently?_ "

Alastor

"Would you believe *Valera?* They passed me a little kit of magical ingredients they happened to have been given but didn't have any use for. All the usual little herbs and spices, but *guess* what I found in the back and have been multiplying ever since!"

He leaned closer with a malicious grin. "I can't speak *directly* to its efficacy on sinners, because I morally object to experimenting with torture methods on humans test subjects—unless I happen to have someone on hand who deserves it, of course." Hand over heart. What a saint. "But every once in a while I'll scoop out a glass of the stuff and dunk a small demonic critter in to make sure it's still potent! And oh, yes, it burns like acid. It burns like napalm. Exactly as advertised. A little different for each creature, but never pretty."

Angel

Of _course_ he believed Valera. He believed Alastor, too. Who would've _thought_ that holy water was such a common commodity outside of Hell? ~~On second thought, that probably made a LOT of sense.~~

Angel bent an equal amount backwards. ( _The grin, the coat, the stature... a VAST difference compared to the image that flashed his mind and nearly sent him COWERING again, but nonetheless one he wasn't quite ready for._ ) A stiff exhale of his held breath and he quickly straightened up. ( _He could get used to this. He DESERVED to get used to this._ )

" Morally object t' torture experimen's on people? Never would've thought the big bad _Radio Demon_ cleaner than the _Outfit,_ " he teased with a matching lean forward, arms crossed and Pelagios thinking he's about to be handed off. _Look at those chubby little orange paws reaching for Alastor._ Angel's voice then dropped into a demonic growl. " So, ya think a couple gallons could fit a ten foot moth overlord's head? An' ya just gonna... give it t' me? "

Alastor

Oh, no getting in Angel's personal space today, all right. "The Outfit is evil for profit! I'm evil for fun! I think that puts me on slightly higher moral ground, don't you?" Studio laughter.

Baby reaching for him. Alastor automatically offered Pelagios a couple of claws to grasp on to. "Let's see, a couple of gallons is..." He conjured up two spectral red outlines of spooky floating milk jugs to hover next to Angel's head. "Should be plenty!" The milk jugs vanished. "Why shouldn't I? Once you know how to replicate it, the stuff's basically infinite!"

Angel

" _Touché ~ !_ No wonder I didn' fit in! " Pelagios let out a small SQUEAL of delight before grabbing both claws. Those four eyes sure are HUGE and soul - consumingly CUTE, but Angel playfully pouted at the comparison between his head, Valentino's, and milk jugs. " Buh - BUH! " He waved his arms through the projections and failed to stifle a snicker. " Not MY head! More like YOUR head! "

Angel then extended a hand to playfully ruffle Alastor's hair before drawing back. " Sorry, I mean, KIDDIN'! Thanks fa... the help... " he said sheepishly before drawing all four arms around Pelagios instead, just to find him very much attached. He gave him a little wiggle, but the seapup just took it as a means to wiggle Alastor's fingers. _So helpful._

Alastor

Seapup grabbed on. Alastor had a dull little burst of happiness that was quickly rolled over by a wave of old longing for a whole generation of young cousins who had once automatically latched onto Alastor’s fingers just like this and who by now were probably all dead of old age.

“It’s close enough! Most heads are about the same size!” And Angel’s was the only one available to hold phantom milk jugs next to.

Alastor automatically jerked his head back from the touch—before Angel aborted the effort himself. Alastor considered Angel’s withdrawn posture, and then the fact that they were probably going to be stuck with each other courtesy of Pelagios for at least a few moments longer; and then sighed melodramatically, tilted his head permissively, and said, “Oh, all right, go on. Just don’t spread the news or everyone will think they can get away with it.” He’d distract himself by wiggling his fingers right back, puppeting Pelagios’s arms in a little dance.

Angel

" N-no... I wouldn' wanna be doin' THAT to ya. I know how t' keep ya shit under wraps... " he said meekly before hesitantly reaching out. His hand didn't fall heavily, but light as a feather as he gingerly pushed his claws through the strands and reassured himself. _See?_ Sure was _Alastor's_ head, alright. Solid. With hair. Red hair with fading brown dye. A certain other Overlord - level demon wouldn't be caught dead with that level of inattention to his appearance. Antlers, not antennae. Ears. _Ya can stop bein' STUPID, now!_ With a ragged exhale, the last of his nerves ceased his shivering as he combed Alastor' s bangs back into place with the drop of his hand. A single, efficient movement.

Angel then stayed silent for a moment before being startled by Pelagios's jubilant squealing and animated dancing. " Ya _sure_ you don' wanna keep 'im fa a little bit? " he asked again with a gentle rub between the seapup's head fins. _Usually,_ that eased him up enough to release whatever death grip or lockjaw he had going on. " I'll come back an' get 'im from ya after I go talk to Kyxs, or ya can hand 'im off t' Valera if you see 'em. Whatever happens first. "

Alastor

His ears automatically flicked under Angel’s touch, but aside from that and his wiggling fingers he held perfectly still beneath the examination. There. Not so bad, was it? And maybe it would help Angel to relax a little.

“No no, that’s quite alright! I enjoy gently harassing small children, but I’m not terribly interested in babysitting one. You keep the kid and I’ll keep the coat.”

Angel

" Ok, say _bye - bye,_ Pelagios ~ " The seapup relaxed in Angel's hands and relented to being cupped over his shoulder with a turn towards the estate.

" _Blu - blu !!_ " he burbled with a double wave of his chubby citrine claws, lightly bouncing along with Angel's gait.

Alastor

"And a blu-blu to you, too!" He wiggled his fingers in a farewell wave at Pelagios.

Alastor made a mental note to make some discreet inquiries about how Valentino wrote up his contracts; and then he crouched down again to continue studying his tide pool.