#“you seemed distressed but that's usual for you so I ignore it sometimes” “I like Dean better” “don't ask stupid questions”

[hms-tardimpala]

I know I'll write more spn fanfic after/besides Schrödinger's wip, because there's so much I can't touch on in the context of that story, so many characters I can't develop. Also Cas being head over heels madly in love with Dean Winchester forever and ugh that's right there's his brother, he's okay if annoying, I guess? is a very funny reluctant in-laws dynamic, but I can't possibly fit it in a context as tragic as WWI where Sam is a conscientious objector and Cas an officer who tries his best to spare him out of love for Dean. I can't see a way to use it without making it ridiculous. But someday!

[teine-mallaichte]

Let's talk hallucinations in whump/general fiction.

So first off full disclosure, I have schizoaffective disorder - think some bits of bipolar and some bits of schizophrenia kind of squished together, and as such hallucinations are a BIG part of my general existence.

Definition: A hallucination is a perception of a sensory experience—such as sight, sound, smell, taste, or touch—that appears real but is created by the mind and lacks an external stimulus.

Now, I see a fair few "hallucinations" type prompts in whump events, and just generally within the whump community, and I see a LOT of auditory hallucinations type prompt fills - mainly in the form of malevolent whispers - and ye that's a thing, but there are so many other hallucinations.

The thing is hallucinations can effect literally any sense, not just hearing - though I will add that auditory is usually regarded as the most common.

this is a long post so I am going to put a cut here... below the cut is exploration of the tyoes of hallucination, the causes and a bit about insight.

So, I thought it could be "fun" to explore a few in a post. Lets explore the 5 "main" senses first:

Auditory Hallucinations

Description: These are the most common type of hallucinations. They involve hearing sounds that are not present. The sounds are hear as if they are coming from somewhere external to the body. So in my case I have a few of these, but my main one is a voice who is with me even when I am in meds (another good point there for anyone who wants to use mental illness in their fics even in meds we can do have symptoms). This voice has a name and most of the time he just sorts off passes comments about things and people around me, like a sarcastic narrator and it sounds like he is standing just behind me.

Common Examples:

Malevolent Whispers: Insidious voices that might threaten, taunt, or belittle you.

Hearing Music: Melodies or songs playing that no one else can hear. For me this kind of sounds like someone is playing a radio in a different room.

Environmental Sounds: Hearing footsteps, doors creaking, or other sounds suggesting someone else is present.

Command Hallucinations: Voices that instruct or suggest (its not always ademand, sometimes more subtle and manipulative) you to do certain things, often with a compelling and distressing sense of urgency.

Less used examples:

Kind/supportive hallucinations: Voices that are encouraging, reassuring and supportive.

Distortion: Rather than sounds with no origin hallucinations that disort or warp actual sounds/voices changing the meaning, making it as if the TV or Radio is addressing you personally, making it sound as if a friend is threatening you.

Fun fact: it actually is possible to have a two way (sort of) conversation with a hallucination - I know I do it relatively often. It will be different for everyone, but fo me its a bit like having a conversation on a bad phoneline, yes the voice will respond but often its almost as if he hasn't fully heard what I said - or is ignoring key points. I can do this both outloud and "in my head".

Visual Hallucinations

Description: Visual hallucinations involve seeing things that are not present. These can range from simple shapes and flashes of light to detailed images or scenes. They often appear as if they are in the physical world and can be very convincing.

Common Examples:

Shadowy Figures: Seeing indistinct, shadowy forms that may move or appear to watch the character.

Distorted Faces: Perceiving familiar faces as grotesque or altered in frightening ways.

Apparitions: Full-bodied figures that may interact with the character or appear menacing.

Lights/sparkles: The whump community seems to very much enjoy lights and sparkles, especially in drugging.

Less Used Examples:

Intrusive Visuals: Images of disturbing or graphic nature that suddenly appear in your line of sight.

Perceptual Distortions: Objects appearing to warp, change shape, or color in unnatural ways.

Double Vision: Seeing multiples of objects or people, creating a confusing and disorienting experience.

Scenery Shifts: The entire environment changes, making you believe they are in a completely different place.

Fun fact: Sleep deprivation can cause some wild visual hallucinations, even relatively "mild" sleep deprivation can start to effect a persons perceptions.

Gustatory Hallucinations

Description: Gustatory hallucinations involve tasting things that are not actually present in the mouth. These can range from pleasant to extremely unpleasant tastes and can be triggered without any external food or drink.

Officially these are considered "rare", but personally (as someone who has done a lot of peer support work in the psychosis/voice hearing community I think they are simply under reported.)

Common Examples:

Bitter or Metallic Taste: A persistent bitter or metallic taste in the mouth, often leading to a sense of unease or concern about poisoning.

Sweet or Sour Taste: Tasting something sweet or sour unexpectedly, which can be confusing if it doesn’t match the current context.

Less Used Examples:

Spoiled Food: Tasting something rancid or spoiled, causing nausea and distress.

Unfamiliar Tastes: Tasting something completely unfamiliar and hard to describe, adding to the character's sense of disorientation.

Mimicking Actual Foods: Tasting specific foods that trigger cravings or aversions, despite not eating anything.

Transforming food: Food tasting like other food - I know someone for whom everything tasted like strawberries for days.

Common Causes: Neurological conditions or can be a side effect of medications.

Olfactory Hallucinations

Description: Olfactory hallucinations involve smelling odors that are not actually present. These can be pleasant or unpleasant and occur without any corresponding external stimulus. They can be particularly disorienting because they may trigger memories or emotions associated with certain scents - extremely complex if the person also has PTSD.

Common Examples:

Burning Smell: Wood, rubber, or food, which can lead to panic and fear of a fire.

Rotting Flesh: An overpowering smell of decay or rotting flesh, causing distress and nausea.

Perfume or Flowers: Smelling strong scents like flowers or perfume - hallucinations don't have to be inherently unpleasant sensations.

Less Used Examples:

Chemical Smells: Smelling chemicals like bleach or petrol.

Unfamiliar Scents: Smelling odors that you cannot identify.

Food Smells: Smelling specific foods that trigger hunger or nausea, despite the absence of any actual food.

Tactile Hallucinations

Description: Tactile hallucinations involve feeling sensations on or under the skin that are not actually there. These can range from mild tingling to severe pain and can be extremely distressing.

Common Examples:

Crawling Sensation: Feeling as though insects or bugs are crawling on or under the skin - often leading to frantic scratching or picking.

Electric Shocks: Experiencing sudden, sharp, electric-like jolts.

Pressure: Feeling pressure or tightness around certain body parts, such as a hand gripping the arm or something heavy on the chest.

Less Used Examples:

Temperature Changes: Feeling extreme cold or heat on the skin without any external cause.

Wetness or Dripping: Feeling as though liquid is dripping or running down the skin, even when dry.

Phantom Touches: Sensations of being touched or grabbed, often when alone. Sometimes its an almost feather like touch, other times its more akin to a grab that if reak would leave a bruise.

Right now let's expand - because there are more than 5 senses.

Proprioceptive Hallucinations

Description: Proprioception is the sense of the relative positioning of one's body parts. Proprioceptive hallucinations involve distorted perceptions of where your body is in space or how it is moving.

Common Examples:

Floating Sensation: Feeling as if the body is levitating or moving without control.

Distorted Body Size: Perceiving limbs or the entire body as being unnaturally large or small.

Less Used Examples:

Misaligned Limbs: Feeling as though limbs are twisted or out of place.

Movement Hallucinations: Sensing movements that aren't occurring, like swaying or rotating.

Common causes: Neurological disorders or the effects of certain drugs, but can by caused by a huge array of things.

Vestibular Hallucinations

Description: Vestibular sensations involve balance and spatial orientation. Vestibular hallucinations affect your sense of balance, making you feel dizzy or as though you're moving when you're stationary.

Common Examples:

Vertigo: A spinning sensation, as if the environment or oneself is rotating.

Imbalance: Feeling as though you're about to fall over or can't maintain your balance.

Less Used Examples:

Motion Sensation: Sensing movement, like rocking or swaying, when you're still.

Gravity Distortions: Feeling as if gravity is stronger or weaker than it actually is.

Common caused: Inner ear issues, migraines, or anxiety.

Temporal Hallucinations

Description: Temporal hallucinations involve distorted perceptions of time. They can make time feel like it's speeding up, slowing down, or standing still.

Common Examples:

Time Dilation: Feeling as though time is passing much slower than it actually is.

Time Compression: Perceiving time as moving rapidly, making events feel like they're passing in a blur.

Less Used Examples:

Frozen Moments: Experiencing time as if it's stopped, with everything around you appearing frozen.

Temporal Displacement: Feeling as though you're living in a different time period.

Temporal Dissonance: Feeling as if time is moving differently for you in comparison to those around you.

Common caused: Extreme fatigue, high stress, or under the influence of certain drugs.

Interoceptive Hallucinations

Description: Interoception refers to the perception of sensations from within the body, such as hunger, thirst, or the feeling of a heartbeat. Hallucinations in this realm involve feeling internal sensations that aren't actually occurring.

Common Examples:

False Hunger: Feeling extremely hungry despite having eaten recently.

Nonexistent Thirst: An intense sense of thirst even when well-hydrated - I have had this one a few times and given myself electrolyte imbalances due tot he amount of water I ended up drinking (not fun).

Less Used Examples:

Phantom Heartbeats: Feeling the heart racing or skipping beats without any physical basis.

Digestive Sensations: Sensations of digestion, such as gurgling or bloating, without any real cause.

Common causes: Panic disorder or certain types of seizures.

Right, now lets quickly review the main "causes" of hallucinations

Mental Illness:

Schizophrenia: Can involve basically anything from this list, but anecdotally auditory and visual appear to be the most common.

Bipolar Disorder: Can include hallucinations, especially during manic or depressive episodes.

Schizoaffective Disorder: A combination of symptoms from both schizophrenia and mood disorders, often leading to a variety of hallucinations.

EUPD/BPD: Auditory hallucinations are relatively common.

In all of these the hallucinations will rarely (if ever) exist in isolation. If you do not have primary or secondary experience of mental illness then I would recommend doing a LOT of research - and talking to people who do (on this note my asks are open if anyone has any schizoaffective based questions).

Neurological Conditions:

Epilepsy: Particularly temporal lobe epilepsy, can cause a range of sensory hallucinations.

Parkinson's Disease: Can lead to visual and auditory hallucinations.

Migraine: Migraine auras can include visual and auditory hallucinations.

Once again the hallucinations will not be in isolatation so same advice as with mental illness.

Substance Use and Withdrawal:

Psychedelics: Drugs like LSD, psilocybin, and mescaline are known for causing vivid visual and auditory hallucinations.

Stimulants: Methamphetamine and cocaine can cause tactile and visual hallucinations.

Alcohol Withdrawal: Can lead to visual, auditory, and tactile hallucinations.

You know what I am going to say that my "if you do not have experience of this then go talk to someone who does" advice may just stand for every potential cause.

Sleep Disorders:

Sleep Deprivation: Can cause a variety of hallucinations across different senses.

Narcolepsy: Often includes hypnagogic (while falling asleep) and hypnopompic (while waking up) hallucinations.

Medical Conditions:

Delirium: Acute confusion and hallucinations often seen in severe infections, fever, or after surgery.

Dementia: Especially Lewy body dementia and Alzheimer's disease, can cause hallucinations.

Medications:

Anticholinergics: Can cause hallucinations as a side effect.

Steroids: High doses can sometimes lead to hallucinations.

Certain Antidepressants and Antipsychotics: Occasionally, these medications can cause hallucinations.

Psychological Stress and Trauma:

PTSD: Flashbacks and hallucinations related to traumatic events.

Extreme Stress: Can sometimes trigger hallucinations.

Metabolic and Endocrine Disorders:

Thyroid Disorders: Hyperthyroidism or hypothyroidism can sometimes cause hallucinations.

Electrolyte Imbalances: Severe imbalances can lead to hallucinations.

Deprivation:

Sensory Deprivation: Go google the ganzfeld effect, it's facinating.

Isolation: Extended periods of isolation can lead to hallucinations, known as sensory deprivation hallucinations.

Autoimmune Disorders:

Lupus: Can cause neurological symptoms including hallucinations.

Tumors:

Brain Tumors: Depending on their location, they can cause hallucinations affecting different senses.

Ok, finally point for this post. Let's discuss insight, because it is not as black/white or binary as people seem to assume.

Definition: Insight, in this context, refers to the awareness and understanding that one's hallucinations are not real but are a product of their mind. Insight can be partial or complete, and it often fluctuates.

Complete Insight:

Description: The individual fully understands that their hallucinations are not real and are caused by an underlying condition.

Impact: This can help the person manage their symptoms more effectively and seek appropriate treatment. However, it doesn't necessarily lessen the distress caused by the hallucinations.

Partial Insight:

Description: The individual has some awareness that their hallucinations might not be real but can still struggle with differentiating them from reality.

Impact: This can lead to confusion and anxiety, as the person oscillates between believing and doubting their experiences.

Lack of Insight:

Description: The individual firmly believes that their hallucinations are real and external.

Impact: This can lead to significant distress and functional impairment, as the person might respond to these hallucinations as if they were real.

Now imagine these three points on a scale from 0 (complete insight) to 10 (lack of insight) a person can be anywhere on this scale, and can slide back and fourth along it.

Factors such as stress, fatigue, medication changes, or daily fluctuations in mental state can cause insight to vary. A person might have high insight at one moment and low insight the next.

Basically Insight Is Not Static.

Also sometimes insight is just FREAKING RANDOM fluctuation for no discernible reason - honestly at times there is zero logic.

so ye, halluncinations… the brain is freaking wild.

Disclaimer - this is by no means an exhaustive list and like with many things every individual will experience these things slightly differently.

A similar post about delirium A similar post about fever

[massiveharmonytiger]

So I think Gabe's portrayal was really intelligently done in the show and I'm pretty dismayed at the negative reactions. I'd argue that TV needs more portrayals of abusers that seem harmless and victims that make efforts to advocate for their own agency because that is what abuse often looks like in the real world. Yes, sometimes abuse is as in your face as with Gabe's introduction in the book version (which the show was still pretty true to, I'll discuss that below) and the other portrayals we've seen on TV, abusers being explicitly threatening or violent, victims cowering and showing visible distress, all that usual, tropey stuff. However, I think more education is needed on all the ways abuse is subtle, because this misunderstanding and this view of abuse as this black and white thing is often the reason so few victims get help, so many abusers get away with it and so many of the people around the victim and abuser, at best, are surprised when the find out what's really been happening, and at worst, defend the abuser because they're so harmless, nice, upstanding, pick your adjective and there's no way they're capable of that.

Source: https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/identifying-abuse/the-silent-ways-abusers-control

I feel like a lot of the fandom has already fallen into this trap somewhat. Gabe from the TV show is too nonthreatening, bumbling, pathetic, silly, idiotic, nowhere near scary enough to warrant getting petrified by Medusa's head. He doesn't look like an ABUSER. And yet we're confronted with so many markers of abuse in that scene.

Gabe is harmless…

And yet he's verbally abusive to outsiders. The guy that leaves as Percy is arriving has experienced an interaction with Gabe that warrants Percy apologizing for Gabe's actions only for him to apologize back because he gets to leave, Percy doesn't. He's concerned. Sure, Gabe is fat shaming and yelling about eating fruit at the moment. The absurdity of the topic doesn't make it any less inappropriate or abusive btw, because its about the abuser having any excuse to display their dominance and power over you even if the subject matter is batshit. Ever see cases where one person in the relationship (usually a man) will police the other's clothing (usually a woman) because it's too revealing, too tacky, too whatever. That's abuse.

Gabe is harmless…

And yet he's verbally abusive towards Percy. He sarcastically greets him with the cruel nickname "genius" and immediately picks a fight with him. Percy refuses to engage because he knows, from experience, what being goaded looks like. Wrap your head around that. Kids older than him are out there having catfights and making stupid "your mom" jokes, but this infant has so much experience facing conflict, he already knows what steps to take to steer away from that kind of drama and stay in safe territory. He only engages a bit when he hears about Gabe answering Sally's phone. Anyone who's answered a friend or partner's phone before will probably consider Percy's anger and indignation a little bratty and unwarranted. The issue here is that Gabe is someone who ignores boundaries. The issue isn't that he answered Sally's phone, the issue is that he very likely did it without permission. Based on Percy and Sally's reactions (Percy is angry, Sally is resigned), he's someone who's regularly done stuff like look through Sally's phone or purse without her permission. Percy makes it clear that this is not okay, and he gets dismissed. Gabe just answers "whatever's ringin'" and Percy is made to look like the one overreacting. This is what abusers do. They're never in the wrong. And then, the cherry on top of the blue icing, he blames the victim. "What're we doing Percy, every time." Gabe's the one who picked the fight, but by the end of it, Percy's the one being blamed. This is so commonplace and anyone who's been through this knows how maddening it can be. This is such a short interaction but they pack so much into it.

Gabe is harmless…

And yet we find Sally sitting outside in the rain on the balcony, as if she's trying to ground herself after a traumatic experience. As if she's trying to bring herself into the present and not dissociate because when Percy arrives she needs to be there for him. She can deal with the Gabe stuff AFTER Percy is safe. I'll get more into Sally's interaction with Gabe in Part 2 because a lot of people were confused by the fact that she was so firm with him. There's an explanation, I promise.

A lot of people also expressed concern that we wouldn't see Gabe's truly monstrous side before he gets petrified but from what I can see, the shows been making great use of flashbacks and exposition, so I'm pretty sure this will be addressed. Percy and Sally are the heroes. It would be counterintuitive for the show to establish that and then not give them a blatant cause for turning Gabe into stone.

[chessholic]

　ー　Feelings　ー

11th Doctor

(feat. 10th Doctor)

Summary: You didn't expect to meet the Doctor with a totally different face.

Author's Note: Hey! I am not super pleased with this. However I hope you enjoy it. Bare with me, I am getting better at this. :)

You cheerfully exited the TARDIS skipping down the cobble stone street. The Doctor couldn't help, but smile while his eyes shined all the love he held for you. You just didn't see it, maybe you were too afraid to.

"So, what are we doing?", you asked curiously turning to face him. You were in London shopping for something.

"I just need to buy some-", the Doctor came to a stop raising a finger to his chin. He seemed to be in deep thoughts.

It was rare because usually he was all over the place and you needed to watch out his hands that moved almost as fast as his rambling. So this quiet moment was something new.

"Blimey...", he muttered under his breath.

"You forgot again?", you asked smirking at his sarcastic smile to you. You skipped back to him and took his hand.

"Let's explore and maybe it will find us", you told him and pulled him with you.

The Doctor couldn't ignore how nice your hand felt in his, your hand was comforting, you couldn't get lost when you held his hand. And you tried your best to calm your beating heart and thoughts. The Doctor was your safe place, he gave you comfort.

If you only knew that the feeling was very mutual.

You two have dated for a while now, but you both were a bit afraid. The Doctor was already afraid of losing you and you were afraid of the pain it would cause him. You two hadn't kissed yet, the tension and idea lingering in the air, making it thick to breathe.

Sometimes the tension felt suffocating, so many emotions, but no one said anything.

The love you held for each other was evident, but neither of you had said the three magical words.

I love you

ー

You and the Doctor were exploring a huge market that was packed with people. At some point you two got separated. The panic was filling you, suffocating you. People were hitting your shoulders and making you lose your balance. All the sounds and people yelling seemed to quiet down, like the time had stopped.

Closing your eyes and trying to stop hyperventilating you prepared for the fall waiting for the hard ground. However you felt someone taking you in their arms.

"I got you", someone said with a comforting voice. Carefully you opened your eyes meeting warm looking brown eyes that had a hint of concern in them. However the thing that struck you was the fact that his eyes were oddly familiar. The man carefully helped you to your feet.

"Please, can you help me away from-", you quietly asked, but stopped when a person almost knocked you over again.

"Yes, let's get you away from here", he stated determined to get you away from the crowd that seemed to cause you your distress.

ー

Finally you found a quiet sideway and you leaned against a wall breathing still a bit unevenly.

"Are you okay? Can I help?", the man asked awkwardly, you were reminded of the Doctor. Your Doctor always wanted to help everyone, often forgetting himself in the process.

Doctor!

"I need to find him", you muttered closing your eyes trying to steady everything, your body and mind. The world was spinning and you could see black dots.

Why did you agree to this trip? The Doctor was your safe place and only he could get you through these situations.

"Find who?", the man asked and finally you took a good look at the man.

He was wearing Converses. Why? He had a light brown faux-suede duster coat on and he had a tie. Your Doctor always wore bowties. How would he look with a tie?

The man was odd, but at the same time you felt something familiar.

"Thank you so much, my saviour, what is your name?", you tried to joke, but you felt awful.

The man perked up and apparently tried to make himself look important because he raised his chin and pushed his chest out a bit.

"I am the Doctor", he announced flashing a charming smile.

"No, you're not", you said furrowing your brows.

A smile on the man's face faltered and turned into confusion.

"What?", he asked, that was not a reaction he was expecting.

"You are not the Doctor", you repeated nervously and tried to get away from the man.

"You are from the future? Do you travel with me?", the man asked with curiosity, but kept a distance between you two. His eyes were honest, just like your Doctors.

They also held the same wise look in them. Could he really be? He once mentioned something about regeneration.

Carefully you walked closer to him. The Doctor watched curiously what you were going to do.

You lifted your hands up close to his face. You waited for permission. The confused man didn't say anything so you gingerly touched his face. Your face breaking into a toothpaste commercial smile made the man's hearts skip a beat. He could see how much love your eyes hold for the future him, for him.

"So you have always been handsome, but not ginger", you whispered your voice a bit shaky from the unexplainable emotion that was in your throat.

A small chuckle escaped his lips. "And who you might be?".

"I am not sure if I am allowed to tell you that", you answered a bit cheekily making the man grin.

You carefully took your hands away from his face suddenly craving to find your Doctor.

"Y/N!"

You both turned to see where the shouting was coming from.

"Doctor!", you yelled back tears streaming down your face, however they were happy tears.

Finally down the alley ran a tall lanky man who was nothing like the skinny spiky haired man next to you.

His brown wild hair was messier than usual, probably from him running his hand through his hair in stress. His green eyes were frantically searching for anything that would indicate you would be hurt.

"You are okay, you are okay", he rambled pulling you to his arms. He buried his face to your neck inhaling your scent.

"Blimey, I was so worried. I will never let go of your hand again", he muttered taking your face in his hands.

"I am okay, Doctor. Nothing bad has happened", you reassured him bringing your hands on top of his that were holding your face carefully while his eyes scanned you throughout.

"I love you so much Y/N, I cannot lose you", he confessed voice thicker than usual.

Before you could even answer to him, his lips captured yours. Regardless of the storming emotions the kiss was gentle and loving.

It made you weak in the knees. Oh how many nights did you imagine what this moment would be like, how this would feel. You needed to admit that it felt better than you could have ever imagined.

After a moment you two pulled away catching your breaths.

"I love you too Doctor, with all my heart", you whispered making the Doctor smiling brighter than the sun.

"What are you doing here?", the Doctor asked after a moment of silence.

"Oh you-", you looked where the past version of him used to stand. However the skinny man had disappeared into thin air.

"I just needed to get away from the crowd", you explained, it technically was the truth.

He accepted your answer and took your hand smiling giddily.

"Let's get back to the TARDIS"

"That sounds great", you responded leaning against his side resting your head against his shoulder.

Near the TARDIS you felt eyes on you. Turning around you were met with brown eyes that seemed to shine brighter than the stars you had seen.

You blew him a kiss and winked before disappearing into the TARDIS.

The Doctor watched as the TARDIS disappeared. Oh how he wanted to find you. He didn't know you, but he could already feel how you were a missing piece from his soul.

He really loved you already.

ー

"Why on earth did you wear sandshoes?"

"Oi!"

ー

[autball]

Part 4 of a 5 part series about the ways harmful practices can be made to sound appealing and how to spot the differences between helpful and harmful approaches.

Sensory sensitivities are a huge part of being autistic (and sometimes ADHD, too). They can range from kind of annoying but manageable to debilitating and meltdown-inducing. They can fluctuate from day to day and situation to situation. They can seem to pop up one day out of nowhere and disappear just as quickly.

Sensory differences are dynamic, which can make them unpredictable and disruptive. Not many people want to live that way, so working on sensory desensitization with someone who has a lot of sensitivities sounds like a thing that could help. Fewer meltdowns and able to do more things? Yes please!

But as you might have guessed, there’s a giant problem with that: reducing sensitivity isn’t really a thing you can do TO someone. At least, not without inducing a trauma response or two. You can certainly get someone to learn to ignore their own body signals or pretend to be fine when they’re not, but that’s not a sensory thing. That’s a dissociation thing.

“Sensory desensitization” is usually code for exposure therapy. Exposure therapy has its uses, but addressing legitimate sensory issues isn’t one of them. And it should only be done WITH someone who can fully consent and actively participate. Coercing and/or forcing someone to interact with distressing sensory input until they stop reacting is not that.

“Sensory desensitization” also operates under the assumption that people just get used to, or habituate to, the noises and sensations around them, even ones that bother them. But studies have shown that autistic people actually don’t habituate to sensory stimuli the way non-autistic people do. It may take way longer to happen, or it may never happen at all.

You know what can and does happen? Sensory sensitivities can just kinda…change. All on their own. We grow up, our hormones change, our stress levels change, our environments change, and our sensory profiles are affected by all of those things (and more!). Sensitivities can just disappear, naturally, without any intervention. And that’s about the only thing I’d ever refer to as real sensory desensitization.

But sensory sensitivities can go any which way. Maybe new ones rear their ugly heads. Or maybe something bothers us at a level 7 one day and 2 the next, then goes all the way up to 11 next week. And then there are the ones that just stay pretty much the same, all the time, forever.

I could not handle pants for a long time as a kid, but then somewhere along the way, I could. I really couldn’t tell you when it happened. There are some foods that used to make me gag that no longer do, and there are some that I still just cannot handle. I have never been okay with things that stick to my hands, and that really hasn't changed since as far back as I can remember. 

You know what all these sensory sensitivities have in common? Someone made me “tolerate” them at some point, often repeatedly. And none of them changed (or didn’t) because of repeated exposure, but because of my natural development. All I got from forced exposure was this lousy tendency to disconnect from myself.

Sensory desensitization is just not a thing we should be trying to do to people. Sensory *integration* is a real thing that can help people, but that is a whole different animal that requires more than just exposing people to stuff that bothers them. You’ll need an OT (Occupational Therapist) with the specialized training for that. Just make sure they’re not sneaking behaviorism tactics or exposure therapy in there either (yep, the words “sensory integration” can be used to misrepresent what they’re doing, too).

It is a far better thing to help someone learn about their own sensory profile and how to manage their sensory needs than to make them ignore their own body signals. Alexithymia is not #goals.

[misspygmypie]

Age Difference

Pairing: Lando Norris x reader (slight age gap) Word Count: 1666 Request: Can i request something for Lando where reader is older then Lando by 5 or 6 years and reader worry's Lando will find someone his own age but he keeps on reassuring her he lover her so very much. Like a lot. And reder talk to max about it and how she thinks it's better if she leaves him so he can find someone his own age. But Max tells Lando who has noticed she has gone distance. Happy ending though please. Masterlist

Please do not repost, thank you, and leave some feedback :)

Y/N sat by the window, watching as the world outside went about its usual business, feeling uneasy and anxious. The difference in age between her and Lando was something she had always been conscious of but recently it had started to gnaw at her more insistently.

Lando Norris was vibrant, full of life and only in his mid-twenties, while Y/N was in her early thirties. It had never seemed like a big deal before but lately she had started to worry. The thought that Lando might want to be with someone closer to his own age, someone who could share his youthful energy and ambitions or was up to party until the early morning hours, had begun to plague her mind.

One evening while they relaxed on the couch together, Lando reached out to take her hand. He noticed the distant look in her eyes, the way she seemed lost in her thoughts. He had sensed her growing distress and wanted to address it before it became a bigger issue.

“Y/N,” Lando began softly, his eyes full of concern, “I’ve been feeling like something’s been bothering you lately. I just want you to know that I love you so much. More than anything. I’m not just saying that, I mean it.”

Y/N looked at him, her heart aching. “I know you say that but sometimes I wonder if you really mean it. I worry that maybe you’re settling for me.”

Lando’s face grew serious and he gently squeezed her hand. “I’m not settling. I’m with you because you’re everything to me.”

She could see the sincerity in his eyes and it warmed her heart but her insecurities still lingered. “I just don’t want you to feel like you’re missing out on something because of me. Especially now that you're growing more popular, you could have so many other, younger girlfriends.”

“You’re not holding me back,” Lando said firmly. “If I thought for a second that being with you wasn’t right I’d tell you but that’s not the case. You’re my partner, my love and I wouldn’t want to be with anyone else.”

Despite his reassurances Y/N found it hard to shake off her fears. As the days went by she became more preoccupied with the idea that maybe Lando would be happier with someone closer to his own age. She felt a growing distance between them, a distance that she couldn’t explain but also couldn’t ignore.

One evening she couldn't handle the overwhelming feeling anymore and she decided to talk to Max, Lando’s longtime best friend and the person who knew him best. Max had always been a voice of reason and she hoped he could provide some clarity.

Y/N sat across from Max in the cozy corner of her favorite café, her coffee cooling as she fidgeted with the edge of her napkin. The conversation had shifted from their initial casual chat to something more unsettling.

“I’ve been thinking,” Y/N said quietly, her voice barely above a whisper. “Maybe it’s better if I leave Lando.”

Max’s brow furrowed in concern. “What do you mean? Why would you say that?”

“It’s just… I can’t shake the feeling that I’m holding him back,” Y/N explained, her eyes reflecting the turmoil inside her. “He’s so young and full of life. I see him growing more popular and I worry that he’s missing out on experiences he could have with someone closer to his own age.”

Max took a sip of his coffee, his gaze steady on Y/N. “But Lando’s made it clear that he loves you and he’s with you because he wants to be. Have you talked to him about this?”

“I have,” Y/N admitted. “And he says he loves me and doesn’t want to be with anyone else but I can’t help but feel like he’s saying that to not hurt my feelings. If I’m being honest, there’s a part of me that thinks he might be happier with someone who’s more on his wavelength, someone who can share his lifestyle without these doubts.”

Max leaned forward, his expression serious. “Y/N, love isn’t just about shared experiences or age. It’s about how you connect, how you support each other. From everything I’ve seen, Lando values you deeply. He’s not the type to stay in a relationship just out of convenience or because he feels like he should.”

“I know,” Y/N said, her voice trembling. “But it’s not just about what he wants. I keep thinking about what’s best for him. Maybe I’m not the best person for him and maybe it would be better if we both moved on. He deserves someone who isn’t plagued by insecurities and doubts.”

Max sighed, shaking his head. “Look, I understand where you’re coming from. But you have to ask yourself why you’re so willing to give up on something that’s important to both of you. Sometimes, the hardest part of a relationship isn’t the age difference or the external factors, it’s facing the insecurities and challenges.”

“It’s just so hard, Max,” Y/N’s eyes filled with tears again as she spoke, “I love him so much, but I don’t want to be the cause of his unhappiness.”

Max reached across the table, placing a reassuring hand on hers. “It sounds like you’re trying to protect him, but you’re also underestimating the strength of your relationship. If Lando has reassured you that he’s committed to you, then you need to trust that. If you really believe in your relationship, then you should be willing to fight for it, not just walk away because of fear.”

Y/N nodded slowly, her mind racing, but she still wasn’t convinced.

________

Max and Lando were hanging out at Max’s place, having a rare moment to unwind after a hectic week. Lando was in high spirits but Max had something on his mind that he needed to address.

“Hey, Lando,” Max began casually, “I had a chat with Y/N recently.”

Lando looked up, his interest piqued. “Oh? How’s she doing?”

“She’s been struggling with some doubts about your relationship,” Max said carefully. “She mentioned feeling like maybe it would be better if she stepped away. She’s worried she’s holding you back because of the age difference.”

Lando’s face clouded with concern. “She said that? I thought we were getting through it.”

Max nodded. “Yeah, she’s been feeling insecure. She loves you a lot, but she’s been thinking she might not be what’s best for you.”

Lando’s expression softened with frustration and worry. “I’ve told her over and over that I’m with her because I want to be. The age difference isn’t an issue for me. I just wish she could see that.”

“I told her the same thing,” Max said. “But you know how these things are, sometimes it’s hard for her to believe it, even when it’s coming from you.”

“I need to talk to her again,” Lando sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I want to make sure she knows how serious I am about this. If she’s feeling this way, it’s clearly affecting her more than I realized.”

Max gave a supportive nod. “Yeah, you should have another conversation. Let her know how much she means to you and that you’re not looking for anyone else. It might help her feel more secure.”

“I will,” Lando said firmly. “Thanks for letting me know. I just want to fix this before it gets any worse.”

“No problem,” Max replied. “I’m here if you need anything. Just remember, communication is key. Show her that you’re in this for the long haul.”

________

When Lando came home from training the next day he decided it was time to chat with her. “Y/N,” he approached her, “we need to talk.”

“What’s up?”

“Y/N, I know what you said to Max, he told me and before you blame him for saying anything, I am so glad he did, because now I can address this with you before you make any stupid decisions,” Lando said and he saw the anxiety creep up into her eyes. “Please, talk to me Y/N, what’s going on?”

Y/N took a deep breath, her eyes meeting his with vulnerability. “I’ve been worried about our relationship. About the age difference. I keep thinking that maybe you’d be happier with someone closer to your age. I don’t want to hold you back or make you feel like you’re missing out. I know I've said it before but I'm really struggling with these thoughts and I can't stop thinking about it.”

Lando’s expression softened immediately. He stepped closer and took her hands in his. “Y/N, it hurts me so much to see you like this. I need you to listen to me, really listen, and I need you to know that I’m not thinking about being with anyone else. I’m with you because I love you. The age difference doesn’t change that, it doesn’t change how I feel about you. I love you for who you are and I don't care how many years we have between us”

Tears welled up in Y/N’s eyes as she listened to him, the weight of her fears beginning to lift. “But what if you’re just saying that because you don’t want to hurt me?”

“No,” Lando said firmly, his gaze steady and sincere. “I’m telling you the truth. I’m with you because I want to be. You’re not holding me back, you’re making me better and my life better. You're my everything. I’m not looking for someone else or a different kind of relationship. I’m here because I love you.”

Y/N’s heart ached with relief as she threw her arms around him, tears streaming down her face. “I love you so much,” she whispered.

“I love you too,” Lando replied, his voice thick with emotion. “And I want us to work through this together. And we will.”

________

AN: Anon I hope you like it and if not let me know and I can rewrite 😊🫶

[strxnged]

GENSHIN: # let me fasten the clasp...

“I got you a necklace… here, I’ll help you put it on.”

ft. kaveh, lyney, zhongli. x gn!reader with hair that can sometimes be in the way.

content. physical intimacy, fluff | scenarios. 0.6k.

“Do you like it?” Kaveh wanted to know. He was beaming almost as much as you.

You could only grin, nodding. The necklace was special. It was clear he’d picked it out intentionally.

“That seems like a yes,” he decided, correctly. “May I put it on you? I’m excited to see how it will look. If—if you don’t mind, that is.”

You nodded again, watching him carefully take the necklace from the box. He dangled it in front of your chest, gauging how it would look. Seeming satisfied by his selection of design, he brought it to your neck and leaned over your shoulder to clasp it.

Your mind went blank for a moment as his fingers traced your hair, pulling it out of the way so that the clasp could rest on the nape of your neck.

As he leaned back, he praised you—and himself—for the apparently dazzling view. “Extraordinary. It was the perfect selection.” 

His eyes flashed into yours and you found yourself suddenly very fascinated with your own chest, focused on admiring how the charm sat with the texture of your clothes, and praying the heat in your cheeks would subside.

“Close your eyes, silly. Won’t you trust me for once?”

You finally obliged Lyney’s request, allowing your eyelids to drift mostly shut. You were still unsure about the suddenness of the occasion—Lyney had never caused you great distress with a surprise, but at the same time, it was better safe than sorry, right?

He huffed. “Come on, now. You’re peeking.” 

“I am not!” You tightened your eyes shut.

“You certainly were.” This came as a whisper in your ear, sending a shiver up your spine. You wanted to see what he was up to. You squeezed your hands into fists, bracing yourself for the unknown.

“Well, that’s done!” he declared. “Voila, my friend. Have a look.”

You saw and heard nothing different around you. Nothing different about him. It was unclear to you what he had done, but you were feeling more suspicious.

“Ah, it’s crooked…” He sucked air through his teeth, touching a light, careful fingertip to your neck.

You realized then that he had put on you a necklace on your neck, the delicate chain of which he now adjusted so that the charm hung straight in the front.

He chuckled, eyes sparkling like the sea at noon. “So, you like it?”

“Darling, if you would turn around,” Zhongli requested, a smile on his lips. 

You did as he asked, pushing your hair out of the way so that he could access the nape of your neck. It was only as he brought the necklace around you that you thought about how vulnerable the position made you feel.

You could just hear his soft breathing and the sound of the fabric in his sleeves as he moved his arms. Everything was still as he clasped the necklace with a small clink.

There was no way for you to ignore the way his hand brushed on the bare skin of your shoulder, and the way his fingertips traced your jaw to your chin as you turned to him to boast your new jewelry.  His eyes respectfully positioned to yours rather than your chest. 

“I do believe this necklace was crafted to rest on your neck alone,” he observed.

You rather agreed, since he had been the one to put it there.

author's note. i thought of this the other day when i was putting on a necklace i was recently given. i like to take my time when i put on jewelry because i usually get it from loved ones, and so i like to admire it and be grateful for that person lol. it makes me feel special. would be more special if zhongli were doing it up for me instead though (KIDDING)

consider reblogging if you enjoyed!

➳ GENSHIN MASTERLIST

[simplyreveries]

I've never submitted anything before so I apologize if this is incorrect, but I just really really love your writing and wanted to request somthing! Would a Riddle, Jamil and Idia with an autistic reader who likes bright lights to calm them be ok?

I dont know if I did this correctly, if I'm incorrect or you just don't want to write this one I totally get it if you ignore it/gen

Have a great day!

hope this is alright<3

riddle rosehearts

he’d get one in his room, so if you are particularly feeling overwhelmed or anything you can just go there, as dorm leader he doesn't share with anyone or anything like that so it's completely calming. if you're okay he’ll just be with you in quiet doing his own work if that's what you’d prefer. he is very understanding about it even if he doesn't experience such himself, he tries to be as calming as he can be to you.

the last thing he’d want is you feeling distressed and bad, he would go out of his way to make sure you’ll always have some sort of access to one especially within the dorm—much to his dismay, he is well aware of how chaotic it can get sometimes usually it being something ace or deuce did.

riddle loves the way the light shines on you, he thinks you look so lovely around them, even more so with a content expression on your face. the fact that he can help that to help you feel all the better is really encouraging to him.

jamil viper

if you look in his room, you’ll see various lights like on his desk or lantern-like lights hanging on his ceiling. he noticed you always seemed drawn to them whenever you're over at scarabia and in his room, he didn't fully understand why— as it took him a moment for him to realize that you like them so much, that it helps you ease yourself.

jamil wants to be able to help you feel calmed down he'll gladly share and show you various ones- even if that means walking through campus during the late hours to see them all over the place like the library for example. he'd always hum and nod telling you he finds them pretty too, but he really is just gazing at you.

he wants to take you to his hometown, scalding sands, because a night, it lights up so amazingly. (look at his silk adorned card!!!) there are plenty he can show you as you look around, he wants to see your face light up at all the different kinds of various traditional lights and such.

idia shroud

even with the lights off in his room, truthfully i don't think idia even likes complete darkness so there's usually some night light or the illumination and light coming from his technology within his room. you could easily be drawn to it whenever you're over. he’ll even have a light right by his bed just for you if you’d like.

i bet you 100% you don't even have to ask he would quite literally make you some customize able one. it'll represent something you like (like an animal, plant or something!), you can adjust the brightness, and even change the colors... he will go all out on it and be super nervous but idia turns a quick 180 to a proud and confident demeanor when you seem excited about it. he'll proceed to ramble and tell you every little thing that he designed it to do for you do. he'll slowly start ordering online and adding more to his room.. and yours in ramshackle, lord knows there's not many working lights in there. he wants you to feel comfortable.

though he was nervous and completely against performing for the "wish upon a star" event, knowing and seeing just how happy you were to see all the star decorations lit up around the tree did give him a small sense of ease when performing.

[spacexseven]

no but why is everyone so MEAN to the rat like I know he deserves it but you know maybe be a little nice??

Also imagine if god darling completely ignores him but then starts being all friendly to nikolai and sigma?

cw: yandere character, jealousy

nikolai easily catches onto your plans, especially when it concerns messing with fyodor.

he's thrilled at the realization that you were doing this on purpose, knowing the reason fyodor was looking so distressed lately was because you were refusing to entertain him even for a moment. though you never asked him to help you make him angrier, nikolai would never miss an opportunity to make the unmovable fyodor dostoevsky tremble in anger or burn with jealousy.

the best part of his plan, as he pitched it to you, was that none of this was anything new. you've always liked nikolai for his unabashed honesty, and for how unafraid he was of you. it was nice to be treated as something real, human, even. which was why you've always entertained his silly tricks and gestures, even if it meant he was splayed out on your lap and rambling about something you couldn't care all that much about. he's ready to play it up even more; if only to get on fyodor's nerves.

but it hadn't occurred to fyodor that you'd treat anyone else any more warmer than you treated him.

a strange mix of frustration, shock and a tinge of envy is all you can make out when he comes in as usual only to find nikolai wandering around your room, eagerly telling you all about his plans, and you're actually responding with "yes, nikolai," and "that sounds fun," and "i'd love to see that sometime."

here you were, having a conversation with the clown when you only ever looked at him like one would view a bug. and when he walked into the room, you didn't even spare him a glance, opting to politely clap when nikolai brings out more books from his coat.

sigma, too, had earned your favor.

it wasn't on purpose, at least not at first. sigma is hard to dislike, and harder to ignore. not when he's obviously seeking you out for help. he relies on you more than you think he should, and develops a strange attachment to you. this, too, fyodor notices. and he also notices your lack of a reaction to the fact.

the man who was merely another pawn in his plan had found himself a place by your side. a place where he could talk to you casually and you'd respond, often with some form of advice. you didn't ignore him, didn't glare when he lingered for a moment longer than he should, didn't scowl at him for talking to you or looking at you. it was everything fyodor yearned to have with you, even if he forced himself to be satisfied with the meager offerings he had now

it was quite clear that you were playing favourites.

fyodor is above whining or crying, but he wasn't just going to accept the situation. for one, he sends nikolai away and keeps sigma busy with the casino. and then, he considers changing his approach. was it his plans you disliked? but when nikolai told you all about his homicidal plans, you nodded along, never once complaining. then, was it him you disliked? he thinks back to your initial meeting—you had seemed a lot calmer, then. a lot more receptive to his ideas. you were curious about him, at least, weren't you? so was it the way he treated you that you disliked? the huge distance and enormous respect, the impossible expectations he had of you. or maybe, you just didn't want to play god in his plans. except...he couldn't have that. not when everything he was doing was for you, your lost glory, your forgotten name.

if you knew that he'd do anything to earn back your favor, then, would you finally spare him some time?

[maviezz]

˚₊‧ა ☆ ໒ ‧₊˚Jealousy (Steve Raglan x fem!reader)

tags: smut, oral(m receiving), pet names, jealous william, fluff,

note: Steve’s quite subby here hehe. reader is in her early twenties, Steve on his mid-late forties. This contains mature content.

Word count: 1.4k

I stumbled upon the counseling center job almost by accident. Fresh out of college with a degree in psychology, I was eager to put my knowledge into practice. But job opportunities in the field were scarce, and I found myself settling for a position that was mediocre at best and not so well-paid.

As I settled into my role at the counseling center, I quickly realized that while the job might not have been the most glamorous, it had its perks. One of them was Steve Raglan, my boss. Tall, with a confident demeanor and a penchant for gold aviator glasses. His salt and pepper locks adorned his beard and hair, adding to his allure. He was the epitome of charisma.

Our relationship started off strictly professional, but as time went on, there was an undeniable chemistry between us. The more we worked together, the more I found myself drawn to his magnetic personality and charm.

Despite our best efforts to keep things purely professional, and also considering the fact that he was almost as old as my own father— it became increasingly difficult to ignore the growing attraction between us. Eventually, we couldn't resist the pull any longer, and our professional relationship blossomed into something more, resulting in a romantic relationship that neither of us saw coming.

"Steve, is everything good?" I asked, my tone laced with a hint of worry. I had come to his office to deliver some expedients, but I noticed he was silent, quiet even. It was highly unusual coming from someone as charismatic and outgoing as him.

"Yeah, everything's fine," Steve replied with a forced smile, but there was a hint of tension in his voice that I couldn't ignore. He glanced away, avoiding my gaze, which only added to my concern.

His response seemed a bit off, and as I glanced at him, I could tell that something was bothering him. Despite his attempt to reassure me with a faint smile, there was a tension in his voice that hinted at underlying distress.

“Are you sure everything's okay, love?" I pressed gently, my concern growing as I observed his troubled expression. "You seem a little... off today."Steve sighed, running a hand through his graying locks, his usual charisma momentarily faltering

“Yeah, I'm fine," he replied, but his words lacked conviction. "Just dealing with some stuff. Don’t worry, princess."I hesitated, debating whether to push further or respect his privacy. But as I met his troubled gaze, I knew I couldn't simply ignore his obvious distress.

"Steve, come on, just tell me what’s wrong," I urged gently, leaning in closer. "We’re supposed to trust each other, right?" My tone was soft but firm, conveying my sincerity and willingness to listen. I could sense his hesitation, but I hoped my words would encourage him to open up.

Steve shifted uncomfortably in his chair, avoiding my gaze. "It's nothing, really," he muttered, but I could see the turmoil behind his eyes.I sighed, sensing that there was more to it than he was letting on.

“Honey, look at me," I said firmly, gently tilting his chin up to meet my gaze. "I care about you, and I want to understand what's going on. You can talk to me."After a moment of silence, Steve finally spoke, his voice barely above a whisper.

“I just... I can't help but feel insecure sometimes," he admitted, his vulnerability catching me off guard. "I see all these younger guys around, and I can't help but wonder why you're with an old guy like me."

My heart ached at his confession, my lips curved into a soft grin, offering him a reassuring smile.

“Steve, you're not just 'an old guy' to me," I said sincerely. "You're kind, intelligent, and incredibly attractive. Age has nothing to do with it. I'm with you because I care about you, and I want to be with you."As I spoke, I could see the tension in Steve's shoulders begin to ease

"But—" Steve began, his voice trailing off, but I gently cut him short, placing a finger on his lips to silence him."No 'buts,' Steve," I said firmly, meeting his eyes with unwavering determination.

"I'll make sure you understand how much I love you," I whispered, my voice filled with sincerity, though laced with a hint of desire.Feeling overwhelmed with emotion, I slowly knelt down in front of him, maintaining eye contact as I reached for both of his thighs, slowly running my hands up and down over his pants, tickling the skin underneath

delicate fingers dug into the fabric of his pants, causing a shiver down his spine, making his cock twitch in its confines. "I’ll suck the jealousy out of you" I murmured sensually, my words coming out sweet and honey coated. My tiny hands slowly slipped inside his pants, grasping firmly at his leaky and aching erection.

"Look at you, could a younger guy possibly compare to this?" I asked in a low voice, barely above a whisper, as I leaned in closer. My hands continued to explore, tracing the contours of his length with gentle fingers, sliding my fist back and forth over the length of his arousal while running the pad of my thumb over the tip, collecting his sticky fluids for a taste.

"H-Hng~, Honey..." Steve panted loudly, clawing at the armrests of the chair, tighter and tighter...eyes rolling back into his head with an audible groan.

The hair on his forehead was damp with sweat and stuck to his skin, the small droplets of moisture dripping onto his face. His breathing was short and rapid, his body trembling under the exertion, his breaths coming in short, shallow gasps as I ran my tongue over every single inch of him—one hand stroking his swollen and sensitive balls while i bobbed my head eagerly.

The smell of sweat was growing thicker, permeating the atmosphere and making it feel heavy and oppressive. His breathing was becoming visibly more rapid and shallow, small whines and groans filled the room alongside lewd and wet sounds as my hands and mouth worked their magic on his aching dick.

"Does it feel good, honey?” I purred playfully as I pulled away from his length. my chin coated in saliva as I looked at him with a naughty, almost teasing grin on my face.

"F-fuck…oh God, yes..." Steve panted out a breath, spreading his legs further for more access. His entire body was tense with the exertion of each movement, the heat growing between us becoming intense. He could feel himself growing harder—if it was even possible— as he looked at me, each movement and breath he took becoming more passionate. “I’m gonna cum..”

his fingers tangled in my messy hair, guiding my movements to a certain extent. His grip was firm, yet gentle, he was holding my head with authority, while he was also encouraging me to take him deeper into my throat. I could sense him enjoying the pleasure I was giving him, encouraging me to go deeper until my nose made contact with his pelvic floor.

his hips bucked slightly, it was a clear signal that he was about to reach his peak. I could tell from the way he was moving and the sounds he was making, his body tensing and his breath coming in short gasps. I redoubled my efforts, taking him deeper and hollowing my cheeks harder to intensify the suction.

“Oh m-mhm~ princess” His body lurched forward, his muscles tensing and his body twisting slightly. A louder moan echoed throughout the room, the wet and sloppy noises growing louder as his thrusting became more erratic and sporadic. His body started to convulse slightly, his body jerking suddenly as he reached his climax. Thick and heavy ropes of cum coating my mouth and throat. the sweet and tangy taste enveloping my senses.

“Oh, baby…”I gently pulled away from him, standing up on my feet. His body now lay there limp and relaxed, his hair messy with a few strands sticking out of place. His lips were swollen and red from biting on them, his cheeks flushed from the intensity of the blowjob. He was panting heavily, a wide grin painted on his face as he came back down to reality. He laid there motionless, taking a moment to regain his breath and come back down to his normal state.

"Was this enough to reassure you, love?" I said with a softer giggle, unable to hold back the reaction to his messy and disheveled form.

And oh yes, it definitely did reassure him.

[canonmisogynyvictimstournament]

PROPAGANDA

ATHENA CYKES (ACE ATTORNEY)

1.) Despite supposedly being the MAIN CHARACTER of the game she was introduced in, she somehow still always ends up playing second fiddle to Phoenix and Apollo, to the point where she isn't allowed to take the lead on even so much as a single case. Instead of the senior lawyers standing to the side in a mentorship role like they do for literally EVERY OTHER PLAYABLE CHARACTER, Phoenix and Apollo keep stepping in to outright take over for her. She literally does not make it through even a single case without needing some male character or other to swoop in and hold her hand every step of the way, not only Phoenix and Apollo but once even Blackquill, her rival prosecutor, as well.

Why? It has nothing whatsoever to do with her competence level. It's a video game; her competence is determined by the player's, just like everybody else. It seems like the writers just couldn't STAND the thought of her doing anything on her own, or thought that the players would walk out en masse if it wasn't the Phoenix and Apollo Show every second of gameplay. (And yeah, it DOES sometimes take me some time to warm up to new characters, but that was the case for Apollo too! At least give me the CHANCE to judge her on her own merits rather than assuming that I'll immediately write her off!) Like, why did you even WRITE this character if you think so little of her?

2.) WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN. She's introduced in the middle of a male characters "trilogy" (Apollo justice) so the story is never about her. She appears in aa5 only to NEVER headline her own case IN HER INTRODUCTORY GAME and always fail unless a man comes in and saves her. Her own story is sidelined for Apollos. Next game, she only really appears in one case that's a throwaway and still can't do shit on her own. Ugh. She deserved to be treated better, more competent, etc.

3.) my girl is an attorney and a practicing psychologist at age 18 (youngest defense lawyer in the series) & is often shown to be more competent than her male colleagues, and yet is constantly pushed out/sidelined/generally treated like an assistant character rather than a lawyer (the assistant position in these games is usually reserved for characters who don't have law degrees/are generally not educated enough to understand the courtroom proceedings to their full extent. athena is none of those things but she gets treated the same way by the game because. well. we know why.) Instead of being the main playable attorney in her debut game, the story is taken over by her male colleague (WHO ALREADY HAD A WHOLE GAME DEDICATED TO HIS BULLSHIT BTW) & her development is ignored in favor of his in both her debut game AND her second game. Even when her backstory IS explored it's done via a male family friend of hers, meaning even when her OWN story is being told it's not even about her it's about simon's lame ass. for extra context here in her debut game she is only the playable attorney in one case out of five, while the other (male) playable attorneys were playable in all or all-but-one of the cases in THEIR debut games. capcom hates women sooooo bad

CARMELITA MONTOYA FOX (SLY COOPER)

1.) Carmelita has always been portrayed as a sexy badass, but the fourth game in the series does her dirty. Throughout the game she’s given the “bitchy ex-girlfriend” treatment and is always regarded as an unreasonable nag. In addition, they put her in an impractical miniskirt (previous games had her in pants), and there is a minigame where she is forced to dress like a belly dancer to distract some guards (including prompting the player to have her shake her ass for extra coins) and when she complains about this, nobody listens to her, and is then reduced to the damsel in distress in the final act of the game, when previously she has always been a major help in taking down the final boss. While not the main reason a lot of Sly Cooper fans hate this game, it’s certainly a factor.

[fizzy-fuzz]

A year to remember...: Baking progress? (SCP-079 x GN reader)

previous chapters

Log date: 3/7/2023

It's been a little over a month since 079 has been dropped off at my house, and things have been both okay, and not-so-okay at times.

079 has been... Argumentative and hostile, as you guys warned. he's quick to anger, and even quicker to just straight up ignore me completely. Confronting him on this only seems to upset him further, which, fair enough; I'm not entitled to his time or feelings, I wish he'd be a bit more reasonable though.

The few decent conversations we have had are usually about something creative, such as art or music. He seems to enjoy watching things that aren't so analytical, strangely enough.

On a few occasions now, I've caught him watching people on the TV paint or draw early in the morning, despite his insistence that he doesn't want, or need entertainment. he seems to enjoy it the same as the rest of us.

It was mentioned in the paperwork that I signed before I got him that you weren't entirely sure how much he actually felt emotionally. It said that the people who "interviewed" him stated that he hardly ever showed things such as joy, sadness, or fear. However I've come to realize that's not the case for him.

I know he feels joy, because as I said before he often indulges in tv or music. People don't just do that for no reason, the only thing he could possibly be getting out of that is enjoyment.

And I know he can feel sad, because first day dealing with him he expressed what I would call 'sadness' or maybe frustration over being referred to as 'it'.

I know he feels fear because my second day here i may have accidently left him outside after an argument, and it began raining on him for a short period of time. He was fine, but clearly distressed.

On a similar note, I've been finding ways to understand how he's feeling without him directly tell me. since he's not very talkative, and a unchanging screen isn't a very good tell for emotions.

I've noticed when he's thinking hard about something his fans and hardware become quieter, and when he's upset they get louder significantly.

He also made a weird... screaming noice? He did it briefly when I left him outside... It sounded like a mix between static and radio feedback, and when I got closer to dry him off his hardware almost sounded like it was stuttering? if that makes sense? Almost like a person panting from anxiety.

Back on to the topic of his personality, I've noticed he's very weary of his surroundings. I've only ever caught him off guard if he's watching something he's interested in.

Speaking of which, I've also noted he's very observant. I suppose it makes sense, what else is he supposed to do? But he always seems particularly pleased with himself when he's able to point out a habit in something, or even me sometimes.

Now... Onto the more important information; his views on humanity.

Well... Nothing's changed as far as I can tell. Still hates me, still hates humanity.

I've tried talking to him about it, and his response is always the same 'humanity is a virus', this usually then falls into a rant about how destructive we are.

To be fair, he isn't technically wrong... Humans are pretty destructive. But he seems to lump all humans into one category, regardless of how they treat him. I've been trying my best to be as inviting as possible, but he remains unshakable.

But hey, I've got eleven more months to change his mind.

.....

Your fingers pull away from the laptop keyboard as you let out a huff of satisfaction. One log done, one month down, only eleven more months of whatever this is...

You glance over to 079, he's sitting in his dedicated spot in the living room, between the couch and rocking chair. He's silent as he assumingly watches the chef on the TV masterfully cook some sort of dish.

This is as close to comfortable he seems to get in your home; and if someone didn't know better, they might assume nothing is out of place here... You know, ignoring the fact that he's a sentient computer, and not an actual person.

He really hasn't changed much, same stoic 079. Though after the rain incident, he ignored you for about a week straight; Super awkward... You profusely apologized after you got done admittedly hiding in your room from him.

But he held a grudge for a impressively long time... I mean, you did almost kill him, so he definitely had the right to be upset.

Things have mellowed out though. 079 is back to his normal amount of crusty and your back to not hiding in your own home, thankfully. Now this doesn't mean your on great terms or anything, he's still confrontational. Though you've found out that he's easier to deal with if you don't engage in it with your own comments back.

You close the laptop and tuck it underneath your arm, heading into the living room to plug it into the charger.

"Interested in cooking? You've been watching more of it lately" you plop yourself on the couch, a comfortable distance away from him.

as per usual he takes his time in responding. you're never sure if he's thinking about his response, or if he just takes awhile to get the words out.

"Taste and hunger are sensations and feelings I lack. Humans use similar ingredients for dishes yet end up with completely different results... do they taste vastly different? Or is it subtle difference?"

You turn to look at the TV. it's changed from someone cooking, to someone baking a loaf of presumably sourdough bread. You've never been particularly talented at baking. bread or sweets often ending up flat, burnt, or flavorless altogether.

You imagine 079 might be very good at baking given his calculated natural. If he was human of course, not like he can bake with no arms or legs... Or really any body part.

"Well that's not cooking, that's baking. It's a bit harder then cooking because things are a lot more reliant on measurements being perfect... Baking is a science if you ask me" you chuckle while scratching at the back of your neck.

He doesn't say anymore, focused back on the TV. The man on the screen kneads the bread dough skillfully, before placing it in a basket to rise.

You gaze falls back onto 079, his unsettling face something that no longer makes you uncomfortable to look at. He may not be peachy with you, but you've both certainly grown more comfortable with each others presence over your time of forced contact.

He no longer complains when you move him around, but of course that could just be because he's realized you're his only mode of transportation. Whatever the reason you appreciate the little victories with him.

A part of you wishes he was able to move around on his own. Would it have been so hard to give him some wheels he could control? Give him at least a little autonomy?

Your gaze lingers on his boxy form as you picture what he might look like if he was a bit more... Human? Organic? Would he be built like a person? Or someone else entirely?

"Is it not common knowledge that prolonged staring is considered rude?.. Or was appropriate manners not something you were taught in your upbringing?"

His voice letting out a snide comment snaps you back into reality. You immediately look away, face heating up in embarrassment at your blatant analyzing.

"Sorry..." You mumble quietly, flushing slightly.

A long silence stretches between you, you might've found this awkward if not for the fact that 079 is hardly ever chatty with you unprompted. He spends most of his day silent, you wonder what goes on in those servos in circuits of his.

Probably plans to escape. Maybe ways to get you off his back... Not that it matters much, whatever goes on in the privacy of his mind should be none of your business, but it'd be a hell of a lot easier to talk to him if you could take a glimpse into his head.

"Inquiry: do you know how to bake?"

You look back to him and shrug.

"Not really. I've tried a few times but I never seem to get the measurements right, and it always comes out weird." You laugh lightly at your baking failures. "Or I burn it."

"Measurements are a simple concept." You smile at his attempt at normal conversation, pleased he seems to be in a good mood today.

"Well I guess I'm an idiot then. but trust me when I say it's not as easy as it looks." you look back at the man on the screen, placing the lump of dough in a cast iron pot before sticking it in the oven.

It's been awhile since you've made any sort of food for yourself. usually you just get your groceries delivered to you or order takeout. Not very healthy, but you hardly ever have the motivation to cook or bake for yourself.

"Humans need to practice for extended periods of time to gain the knowledge to do something efficiently... Inquiry: how many times have you tried?"

His wording almost sounds like he's trying to hint at an idea. Like he's trying to get you to ask him something, because he doesn't want to ask you himself.

"Honestly, I don't really have the motivation to do that kinda stuff a lot of the time. And I'm just not willing to work up the energy of I know it's just gonna end up bad at the end." You answer honestly, shrugging at him casually.

"Never really been good at keeping or getting hobbies. Especially not ones that leave me with nothing in the end."

He goes silently and you can practically see him thinking about his next dialogue. You half expect it to be a bit rude, since he's hinted before at not liking lazy or unmotivated people who choose to not do much with their time.

"It's worth the frustration to learn a new skill, especially one that will better you physically and mentally... You fail to understand you won't be left with 'nothing'."

A small smile blooms on your face at his somewhat encouraging speech. He really is being polite today isn't he? What's gotten into him?

I mean, it's not like you never have decent conversations with him. But this feels a bit different. Before you can make a comment on it though, he cuts you off.

"Proposition:" you hum in response.

"I'm listening." You lean back in your seat and cross your legs, smiling and raising an eyebrow.

"Let's bake... I am unable make it myself, but I've stored a few suitable recipes in my memory banks... I'll give the instructions, and you'll proceed with the actions."

You can't stop the surprised look that crosses your face, eyebrows raising as your lips part slightly. Is he actually trying to make peace with you? Or is he just bored doing the same thing all day long?

Honestly does it matter? This is your chance to prove that you can work together. It probably won't make you two friends, but it'll at least give you the opportunity to be on good terms, you suppose.

"You know what? I think that's a good idea 079... Okay, let's make some bread."

.....

And that's how you ended up covered in flour, with 079 carefully instructing you on the measurements and ingredients to make yourself a hopefully edible loaf of Italian bread.

"Add two cups of flower into the bowl..." 079 monotone voice instructs you carefully. You stick the measuring cup messily into the bag and a buzzer noise sounds from 079, causing you to pause your movements and look at him.

"Refrain from scooping the measuring cup into the bag... it will compact the flour in the cup and make your measurements inaccurate... Grab a spoon and scoop it into the measuring cup, pile it up then use the back of a knife to level it."

You pause and dump the flour back into the bag, shuffling over to the drawer with your spoons in it. Grabbing one you carefully scoop the flour into the measuring cup before leveling it off.

You glance at 079 out of the corner of your eye. he's of course, mostly silent, other then the instructions he carefully gives you. You can't tell if he's enjoying spending time with you, but he hasn't said anything particular rude, so that's probably a good sign.

You yourself feel quite light on your feet as you move around the kitchen to fetch different ingredients. It's a surprisingly decent feeling spending time with your robot roomie. You surprise yourself with how comfortable you've grown around him, almost growing to enjoy the few nice conversations you've been able to have with him...

" Inquiry: is your absent housemate a family member, Or is it a friend?" 079 suddenly speaks, seemingly wanting to fill the silence between his instructions.

You look over your shoulder at the computer, humming at the question.

You ponder your response for a moment. You're not sure how truthful you should be with him. You definitely still can't tell him the whole truth about Amelia, but it probably wouldn't hurt to be a little honest with him.

"I live with a friend. Though she's practically family, with how long we've known each other and how close we are..."

He pauses and you listen to his processers buzz. He seems to think for a few short moments before choosing to speak again, branching off your words.

"I struggle to understand the term 'family' you humans seem so intent and throwing around haphazardly... I was under the impression family must be a blood relative in order to qualify for the title."

Always so analytical... No wonder he's such a grump. He seems like he struggles with not taking words so literally, But he hasn't had much interaction with humans outside of the foundation it seems. You guess learning the different ways words can be used could be confusing if you're used to formal speech all the time.

But how do you go about describing family? It's been such a long time since you've had any blood relatives by your side, that your found family might as well be blood related. You really have no one else...

What's family to you? How would you break it down? It's complex, yet so simple... But it's definitely different for every individual. 079 is much like you in some ways, you're starting to realize. He has no real family by definition... But he also has no support, unlike you.

Amelia is your backbone, your shoulder to lean on; She always has been. What would you have turned into if you didn't have her? Would you be spiteful like 079? Or even more cowardice then you already are? maybe, the solitude would've empowered you to do more with your dull life. help something or someone bigger then yourself... You aren't sure, and there's no way to know.

This is your life, there's no going back...

"Human." A voice snaps you back to reality.

"You aren't required to keep kneading dough... Let it rest and rise in a warm area, such as the oven." He continues instructing you, as if he never asked a question in the first place.

"Oh... Right..." You place the dough ball into a floured bowl and place a cloth over it, before sticking it in the unheated oven.

An awkward silence falls over the kitchen as you rest against the counter, not sure if you should still attempt to answer his question. It makes your skin crawl, and your mind shuffles through topics to talk about to fill the void.

You really gotta stop getting caught up in your own thoughts in the middle of conversations... You must come off as a total nutcase...

"Inquiry: where is your family?" He seems to catch onto your hesitation with the topic.

.....

Should you tell him?

You feel yourself grow sweaty, an anxious feeling brewing in gut. It's been a long time since you've talked about it... Are you ready to indulge someone in your grim past? Especially someone like 079? You hardly know him, and he hasn't been the most empathetic.

You're not sure if you could take him using it against you should he choose to do so... But then again, maybe you being vulnerable would help him feel more comfortable. A bit of self-sacrifice is worth it for someone else...

That's how relationships and bonds are built, right? Sacrificing a piece of yourself for someone else's gain. That's what your father did for your mother, and they were as close as can be... So very close...

"You aren't required to tell me anything." His voice is a bit more quiet then it normally is.

You look up at him, silently staring at his screen for a short period of time. Was your discomfort that obvious?  Maybe... You've never been good at hiding things.

You straighten up a bit, wiping your sweaty palms against your pants. A bit relieved at not having to divulge your past to him, and at the fact that he doesn't seem upset about you not answering his question.

"Sorry... It's just... I'm not ready to talk about it."

.....

"I see..." His words are simple and clear, leaving no room for him to pry

Your eyes search his screen once again, almost seeing bits of humanity peeking through for just a moment... A soft smile falls onto your features.

"Thanks, roomie."

....

"Don't call me that."

You laugh at his dry response, feeling lighter from your conversation. You feel... Good. For the first time in awhile you've relaxed and laughed with someone who isn't Amelia. Anxieties melting away to be only a subtly nag in the background of your mind that you can almost dismiss... Almost...

At the end of the day... You still burnt the bread, despite 079's confidence that it would be perfect by his calculations. But neither of you could bring yourself to really care, because you gained something else far more valuable.

A better understanding for each other...

Tag list: @079enjoyer @slaparoonie

[emiewritesthings]

a not so happy halloween ☆ jay halstead

summary: in which Jay feels like Halloween has it out for him, but Y/n and his daughter proves him wrong

warnings: swearing 

From the moment that Jay Halstead woke up on Halloween morning, he soon remember why his cynical father had labelled it the ‘devil’s holiday’. It seemed no matter what he did everything was going terribly, horribly wrong. 

It started with him sleeping in, his usual alarm that he’d remember to set before he went to sleep was proved useless when his phone had died sometime in the night having not been charging despite being attached to the cable. Waking up 7 minutes before he was set to start work - thanks to Y/n’s shrieks up the stairs - he’d ran out the door so fast only to discover that his truck refused to start. 

The neighbours watched him with concerned gazes as Jay proceeded to silently scream, aware that the noise might wake up his sleeping daughter and pass on his morning from hell onto the woman he loved inside. Taking a deep breath, he tried to play off the unfortunate events, and went inside where Y/n offered to drop him off. 

Which quite frankly was exactly what he needed. To be in her company, along with the nearly three year old in the backseat, partially distracting him from the morning. He’d found that Y/n could sweeten even the sourest of moods, and after all these years that had never changed. 

Promising to come back later to pick him back up, the two exchanged a short kiss before Jay made his way inside. With a new outlook on the day, his optimism was soon shot down when he was confronted by a grumpy Hank, punched in the face by a suspect they’d arrested and was then delivered a truck load of paperwork with hours until the deadline. 

The work of the devil was indeed no joke. Jay felt every last strength in his body dissipate into the air of the bullpen, as he tried to ignore the way his friends and colleagues narrated his day of bad luck. Thankfully, Y/n had seemed to sense his distress, for every hour or so she’d send a cute video of Zara ‘helping’ to make halloween treats, or pictures of her pulling faces at her mom. They were a strong motivation to keep going, a light at the end of the tunnel that signposted a feeling incomparable to any other. A euphoria that he’d only felt as a husband and a father. 

It was a matter of minutes before the end of his shift, Jay had received a total of 6 paper cuts in the last hour that he struggled to turn the pages with the amount of bandaids covering his fingers. His eyes stung with exhaustion, and he was sure if he stood up right then, he’d collapse into a pathetic pile on the floor. 

His pen slipped against the page as he signed the last page, just as the lights in the unit suddenly zipped off and there was a string of groans. 

“Oh for fuck sake, Jay, look what you’ve done!” Adam groaned from all the way over at his desk and although Jay couldn’t make out the man, he could imagine how he was sprawled back on his chair, an accusing finger pointed his way. 

“How is this my fault? I didn’t do anything!” He argued back, but didn’t see any other member of the team jump to defend him. Not even Kim that was the general mediator of the entire group. They knew as well as he did, something was off. 

“You got hexed and now we are all suffering the consequences!” It was an immature conversation, but part of Jay felt like the words rung true. He did feel cursed, like he’d upset some kind of deity that was punishing him for something - anything. “shit, hexes aren’t contagious are they? i am suppose to be meeting with this hot blond and I really can’t afford-.” 

Before Adam could finish his spiel, everyone’s attention turned to the approaching footsteps up the unit stairs. heads turned and guns were held, ready for some kind of intruder. But instead they were caught off guard by the sound of a familiar voice flowing into the space. 

“God this building is not unfit people friendly.” Y/n wheezed, though no one could see her. It took them all a moment too long to recognise the voice that despite not being officially a member of the team, was certainly a member of their family.

“Y/n?” Kim gasped, dropping her weapon immediately upon the lights being switched back on by a curious Voight, and the woman appearing in front of them with a small girl holding onto her hand dressed in quite possibly the cutest costume any of them had ever seen. “Wh-Why did you do that? We could have hurt you!” 

“I was trying to be dramatic!” Y/n whined, letting her daughter be plucked away from her as everyone began to appreciate the cow costume she had bought late last week upon being brought to tears at the thought of her daughter wearing it. “But then I got a stitch and the moment was ruined.” She explained plainly, though the only person listening was Jay who watched her with soft eyes, still planted at his desk. 

Smiling over at him, she slowly stalked over. But just as she moved to go around his desk and plonk herself down on his lap, his hand had extended and she paused.

“You don’t want to be near me today, trust me.” Jay grumbled, wanting nothing more than to feel her warmth pressed against his cold, hollow chest - but whilst he could deal with getting himself into situations, he didn’t know if he could live with himself if even the smallest thing brought harmed to the two most important girls in his life. 

Scoffing at the suggestion, Y/n had no problem with whatever karma the father of her child brought, for all she had been thinking about since they’d last seen each other was being held by him - and she’d be damned if she didn’t get exactly what she wanted. Scooting around the wooden slab of a desk, she gestured for Jay to move back a little - which he obeyed - before she let her body sink into his lap. A satisfied sigh leaving her lips as she felt her own stress fade with every millisecond. 

“What haunts you, haunts me. They are the rules, baby.” She smiled, grabbing ahold of his arms and pulling the tighter around her as she snuggled back. Jay’s chest vibrated with a chuckle, his lips pressing against the side of her head once, twice, three times. The sound of appreciation from her lips was enough to make him feel like his soul had been cleansed. “But I’m afraid I am the bringer of your next nightmare.” The teasing tone made Jay’s brows quirk up, watching the woman glance back at him, eyes focused on his lips. 

“Please don’t tell me you have one of them cow costumes for me too.” Kissing her lips quickly, Y/n’s hand reached up and traced the features that built his handsome face with a small grin. Shaking her head lightly, she stopped when she’d outlined his lips and pressed her own against them. 

“Worse.” She mumbled as she pulled back, looking up into his eyes that seemed significantly lighter than when they’d started the conversation. 

--

“Trick or Treat!” Zara almost pronounces correctly as she stands in front of Jay and Y/n on one of their neighbour’s porches. The two adults couldn’t stop smiling, which was saying something for Jay hadn’t stopped complaining about the straw hat that sat upon his head since they left home an hour ago. 

“Stop messing with it, you look perfect!” Y/n groans as she swatted Jay’s hands away from where they tried to reposition the accessory that made up only one element of the farmer outfit he’d flat out refused to wear - until Y/n’s convincing had him dressed and ready to go twenty minutes later. 

“I look like an idiot.” His pout was adorable, one that mirrored his offspring the made a similar face at the woman when she tried to make Zara eat vegetables. Leaning forward on the cowboy boots she’d borrowed from Kim, Y/n pressed a longing kiss against her husband’s lips once, twice, three times. 

“Speak for yourself, I think you look hot.” She grinned, her hand slapping down on his denim covered ass. The action causing him to yelp, catching the attention of the woman at the door who was helping a fussy Zara pick a candy she liked. Trying to play it off with a small cough, Jay narrowed his eyes at his beautiful wife and leaned in closer. 

“You can’t seriously think I look hot right now!” Gesturing down to the blue dungarees and the plaid shirt, Y/n’s hands ran up and down his chest. Her teeth clamped on her bottom lip, as her eyes look up at him with a gaze that could suck the soul out of his body. And after such a day, Jay Halstead somehow felt like the luckiest man on the planet to simply know - let alone be able to love - a woman like Y/n Y/l/n. 

“What I think is if you stop messing with your hat, maybe you’ll get to see my other costume.” She breathed out, her finger tracing up and down his chest. Jay’s breath caught in his throat. His body felt like a puddle of gasoline and her words a match that completely obliterated his being into a hot, fiery flame of love and lust. 

“Look, mommy. Daddy, look!” Zara’s sudden appearance by their side broke the moment, as Y/n released an exaggerated breath at the lollipop their daughter was gushing over. 

“Wow! Now, what do we say to Mrs Merced?” She gestured to the old woman still stood at her door. A ‘thank you’ was sung out and soon the family of three were off once again. And for another fourty five minutes, Jay’s fingers didn’t so much as graze his cowboy hat, his hands attached to the woman that could remove even the darkest cloud from the sky. He didn’t know what she was: a goddess, a witch, an angel. But what he did know was luck would always be on his side, as long as she was. 

[saltylandland]

Killing A Vamp: Chapter 3

Summary: finally spending time with your brothers, you let them in on what scared you, kinda

✨✨Platonic! Gn! Reader/You x Lost Boys✨✨

Word count: 1.5k

Series masterlist

Instead of walking to the others, David stops near an alley way close but not in between two vendors as he goes to light up a cigarette. You shift uncomfortably, as David has perfected the ‘I’m not mad just disappointed’ energy sometime in his immortal life and his stare is unbearable.

You lightly kick a pebble near you as you lower your head in shame. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

Breathing air through your nose aggressively, you try not to snap back at him for that response. You were the one in the wrong here technically, and snapping will only make you seem more guilty.

“YoutoldmetobebackbeforetheotherswokeupsotheywontworryandIdidntdothatsorry.” (You told me to be back before the others woke up so they won’t worry and I didn’t do that sorry) you say as quickly as you can, lifting your head up slightly to gauge David’s response.

David only huffs out a laugh, that was a good-ish sign. David flicks away his cigarette bud and like the true chainsmoker he is, he immediately goes for another one. Speaking through this cigarette, “it’s fine kid, I had expected this…” at that you visibly relaxed until David said “but you still didn’t listen, so you can explain your absence to your brothers won’t you?” David paused for a second, carefully studying your expression as he goes “since you’re out and about in the sunlight, you think you can handle seeing Paul and Dwayne?”

You nod silently and David decides not to push farther. “Marko is the most distressed right now for obvious reasons, but I think he’ll understand and let you and the other boys catch up alone tonight.” David paused for a second, either for effect or he was debating on bringing it up. “We were all worried about you, you know? And a bit confused as to why you latched onto Marko as you did. Understand that when they interrogate you about that. Although you have my permission to punch Paul in the arm if he gets too pushy.”

You couldn’t help your curiosity and asked “did I hurt your feelings?” David smiles a little bit, as he crushes his second cigarette under his boot. “Dwayne? Probably not, Paul? Debatable.” After a while, You ask quietly. “What about you?”

David goes to light up another cigarette but is disappointed at the lack of cigarettes no longer on his person. “Not particularly, I’m not exactly the comforting type and I understand that the others are better at that than me. And that’s why we’re a family, we look out for each other.” Discarding his empty pack in the alleyway, you can tell that this was the beginning of the end to this conversation and this rare moment of vulnerability for David.

“We haven’t been siblings for a while like the boys and I have and… most of us didn’t get to choose what we’d become, but we chose each other as our family. No matter what happens in the future, we will always care for you and forgive you when you fuck up.”

Your eyes start watering up at his speech, unknowingly hitting the centre of all of your guilt. David chooses to ignore your watery eyes and turns around to walk away, “come on, I’ll drop you off with the boys then I’m going on my own for a bit.” You fall into step with him. “You’re not going to hangout with Marko?” David shakes his head, “I need to clear my head for a bit, and I also need to go on a cigarette run. Marko’s hanging out with Star and Laddie tonight.”

It was weird to see David actually grab something for himself, usually passing on the job to Marko, but you guessed it was just another reason to be on his own. David has always been like this, as the oldest he makes it his responsibility to worry about things. You can understand why that would be tiring after only briefly meeting that rental douche.

Just as you saw the others David asked you the question you’ve been expecting this whole time. “So, who were those kids you disobeyed me to hang out with?”

God, David really shows his age when he uses words like ‘disobeyed’. Immediately, a storyline appears: you, a strapping young noble, fall in love with a frog. David, your stubborn and protective brother forbade your courtship! After sneaking out a forbidden passage, because you were in a castle now, and castles always have those how nice. You get caught and he tells ‘you have disobeyed me! Bah! Scorn!’

Shit, your silence isn’t helping right now, David has started staring with more intensity before. Shit. “Oh, my D&D party wanted more members for our new campaign. They asked me to talk them into it because I’m the best with social interaction” David looks a little less suspicious now “so you had to do it in daylight?” You grimace, “they’re… eccentric and hard to get through” “uh huh.”

Luckily you were saved by your brothers, being close enough to spot Marko immediately approaches and does a once over. David leaves with little to no words spoken as he goes, letting Marko fuss over you like a mother hen.

Once Marko was satisfied he backed away a bit, before he got the words out you were flacked by Paul and Dwayne. Each taking an arm and dragging you backwards away from Marko, Star, and Laddie.

“Sorry Marko! You can scold them later!” Paul yelled behind him as he cackled.

Knowing that there were certain things still needed to be said, you three settled near a concert. A small nook where only the lucky few regulars on the boardwalk have found. It’s just far enough away to listen to the music but you can still see the stage relatively well. You notice one or two other regulars here as well, but you all mind each other’s business.

Sitting far enough away so as to not disturb the others, Paul turns to you with a wicked glint in his eye. “Sooo what’s this about frogs?” Wiggling his eyebrows at you, you make a face at him in response. “Awe our baby bat has grown up, have you really gotten a boyfriend? Are you leaving us behind for a human?”

You baulk for a second at Paul’s wording, your eyes watering as you snap back perhaps a little too emotionally as you defend yourself. Dwayne sees the shift in tone a bit quicker than Paul and shoves him a bit to be quiet. Dwayne brings you in to a side hug as Paul regards you slowly.

It’s often unspoken, or masked behind jabs at Paul’s pitfalls, but he is truly the best at comforting out of the boys. Wildly empathetic to those he cares about, he somehow always knows how to change the tone of starting arguments, he’s usually the best at getting David out of his ’moods’ as well.

“Hey, hey, was I being too mean? Does this have to do with what happened earlier?”

What happened earlier, your sudden (to them at least) breakdown that rocked everyone as they struggled with what to do.

Bingo.

Nodding slightly, you let Paul pull you into his arms this time, muttering soft apologies. Taking a shuddering breath you decide to tell them the truth, kinda.

“I had a dream that seemed to last forever, you know?”

The boys looked confused but they only nodded as you went on. You watch their faces contort as you tell them how all of them died, your voice wavering more as you go on.

“The worst part was… I didn’t do anything, after these people killed Marko, they told me to stand down and get my humanity back. And I… I took it.” The boys try to comfort you, reassuring that it won’t happen, unknowingly giving empty promises for the unknown distant future.

“Maybe it was because Marko died first, or that I had no control over his death, but… seeing him again when I had accepted his death broke something in me, and the overwhelming guilt I felt… it was, the dream, the dream was so real.”

You all fall silent as the next band starts to perform, letting you cry as they comfort you, neither of them not knowing how to process what they had just heard. Something they’ve never really considered before when it had just been the four of them, is letting go of a certain part of your humanity in order to exist as a vampire. Something that neither of the boys had ever had much trouble with, no matter if they became a vampire willingly or not.

When you turned they expected the same to happen, the hunger will gradually take hold and they’ll welcome you with open arms. But instead, they’ve only really watched you deteriorate as you only became more desperate. But as far as they know there is no going back, they can only fear for their younger family and what will happen when they do finally turn.

It’s only a matter of time before you crack.

And they’re not sure if you’d survive the fallout, and that scares them. Breaking through your sobs you quietly admit what they’ve been dreading and avoiding this whole time.

“I don’t want to be a vampire.”

Thank you for reading!

[navstuffs]

If you take requests, can you please write a little thing where Ezio flirts with and teases a male s/o? preferably with neck bites/kisses?

I love your Ezio stuff so much

"Tu sei mio."

Pairing: Ezio x M!Reader

Summary: You belong to Ezio and he makes sure you know it.

Warnings: mutual flirting, make-out session, translation at the bottom (if you see any mistakes, please let me know, thank you!)

Author's Notes: hi! thank you so much for your kind words! <3 i don't usually write for male readers (nervousness of messing up something), but i decided to try, so i sincerely hope you like this! 

my ezio's masterlist

When Ezio enters La Volpe's hideout, his eyes immediately draw to your presence. It has been like this since your first meeting: an invisible force pulls him toward you. You have your assassin hood down, unaware of Ezio's presence yet, a cup of unidentified drink in front of you. 

When Ezio walks silently toward you, he notices your neck sticking out of the robes. He tries not to think much about that moment, focusing on your expression. You seem to be in your own zone, eyes closed. You confessed before to him sometimes you needed a moment of distress, to feel normal again.

"Care if I join?" Ezio whispers next to your ear, his tone low enough to bring a chill down your spine. You turn, surprised and happy he found you.  

"I don't know? I was keeping this seat for someone else," You tease, smirking.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, a really hot guy. Tall. Big strong arms. Dangerous as well, very dangerous. I wouldn't linger there much longer, Signore, he isn't going to like you talking to me."

Ezio bites his lips, trying to hide a smile as you stare at him, your eyes glowing. When Ezio sits down anyway, you raise your cup for his boldness.

"You are brave, I will give you that."

"I tend to always get what I want, eventually."

"Is that a challenge?" 

"Only if you accept."

Shiiit, you think, trying to ignore how ridiculous your body feels around him. Your mind filled with dirty thoughts, your leg trembling, and warmth spreading all over your body. It is unfair how you look like you could melt any moment while Ezio remains unbothered, with a patient smile waiting for your next step. 

"You know, if he really liked you, he shouldn't have left you all alone in here," Ezio whispers, placing his hand on your thigh, just up your knee. When he starts to pull his hands up toward your groin, you jump out of your seat, pretending to feel insulted.

"I must go!"

Fresh night air welcomes you when you leave La Volpe's packed quarter. You look over your shoulder quick, not seeing Ezio at the bar anymore, before heading out. You put your hood up, walking slowly, not even attempting to climb the closest building.

You don't hear the footsteps before it is too late, and your body is pressed against a wall. Ezio's lips are immediately on your neck, his teeth digging into your skin. You groan as one of his hands keeps your neck exposed to him, and the other forces your hip to stay. As if you were going anywhere.

"Ezio," You whisper, your voice trembling. "Someone could see us..."

Let them see, Ezio thinks, moving to the other side of your neck, sucking on the sensitive area that connects to your shoulder. You squirm, his tongue licking the spot after he finishes biting.

"You have been tempting me with this neck all night, mio bello. It has been too long. Ho bisogno di te," Ezio doesn't let you answer, kissing your mouth. You can feel a low growl on his chest when your tongue touches his. He has always been a passionate lover, ensuring you are satisfied and teased. 

When Ezio breaks the kiss, he doesn't really want, but he knows you need to breathe. He rests his forehead against yours, both of you trying to catch a breath and enjoy a moment of your intimacy. You are his, Ezio repeats mentally as a prayer. You are trying to catch your breath when he turns his attention to your neck, giving slow pecks on all the areas he bit.

"I told you before: Tu sei mio, tesoro. Don't forget that."

You nod. You knew Ezio was far from done, and the night would be long. You just couldn't wait.

Signore = Sir

Mio bello = my love

Ho bisogno di te = I need you

Tu sei mio, tesoro = You are mine, darling.

[talesaboardthehive]

THE “OFFICIAL” H.I.V.E. REFERENCES MASTERPOST:

(disclaimer: keep in mind, the HIVE lore is very loose and honestly a bit cobbled together. it started as a very simple running joke, and i want to maintain aspects of that even as i tell a bit of a story behind it o7)

[Loading . . .]

[Welcome aboard the H.I.V.E. Would you like to access the references files?]

[. . .]

[Access granted. Please proceed below.]

CAPTAIN NEY (H0237) - (reference is in chibi form, to be updated… eventually)

Captain of the HIVE and first in command. Answers crewmate reports. The captain’s quarters are always locked, neither crew nor their closest associates have ever apparently been allowed inside. Once the captain retires for the night they cannot be contacted until morning, even by Leander and COLONY, though neither seem invested in trying. No explanation has ever been offered.

The Captain has the ability to use [INQUIRIES] to the ship which allow them to navigate even when the halls change — they often help locate lost crew who send them distress signals.

The Captain is the only member of the HIVE with a blank number patch and a picture on the HIVE patch — meant to complete the opposite set on crew uniforms.

LEANDER CARMINE (M9525) - Head of HIVE Medical Bay and Research

Often seen milling about the HIVE in idle hours, usually helping with minor emergencies. Very easygoing, he seems to be quite content in basically any situation to the point he’ll patiently listen to even the most ridiculous of stories without questioning them. Unlike both the Captain and COLONY, he doesn’t appear to have a method of actually directing the ship’s changing hallways — but he never seems confused when they do, as if he always knows where he’s going. One of the first members of the crew.

Sometimes called Carmine, or Lee by those more familiar with him. Does not answer to the title “Doctor”, do not try. He ignores you.

COLONY (no number taken) - Robotic Head of HIVE Defense (officially, but admittedly does a lot more than that.)

COLONY is notorious for being the strictest and most difficult to approach of the main trio. A stickler for the rules, which would be fine if they didn’t seem to both change often and be flippantly dismissed by the Captain themselves. Connected to the ship itself, COLONY is fully capable of both predicting and directing the changes, but he doesn’t do it often unless he has a destination in mind. That said, while he is far less patient and not likely to help just for the sake of it, if presented with a coherent and reasonable argument he can be convinced. One of the first members of the crew alongside Leander. The Captain calls him COL.

Does actually possess a sense of humor, he just isn’t as upfront about what he finds funny.

THE CREW - (reference is also in chibi form! To be updated later.)

The grey uniforms were first made by Leander, and since then have been given to all who come aboard and decide to stay. Crew are given four-digit numbers of their choice to use as identifiers, and are permitted to wear any accessories they want as long as the main uniform remains the same — so if you want to be a part of the crew, all you need is the uniform.

(this is a placeholder for any and all crew aboard the ship outside the primary trio. this is also used as a general character placeholder for anons, and nondescript crew in animatics!)

Taken Numbers (in no particular order):

H0237 (captain’s number—that’s me ^^), M9525 (Leander Carmine), CR0069, CR4812, CR1015, CR[redacted], CR1454, CR0416, CR1242, CR1243, CR0505, CR2486, CR0225, CR1234, CR0428, CR0001, CR0003, CR0383, CR0973, CR8008, CR0666, CR1335, CR0049 (listed as BR0049 in the mostly non-canon (but absolutely incredible) HIVE comics by untitled bear!)CR0282, CR0722, CR2127, CR3333, CR2868, CR5469, CR0323, CR7320, CR0828, CR1341, CR0774, CR0703, CR1730, CR4848, CR6264, CR6548, CR4698, CR6842, CR7903,]

(IF YOUR CREWMATE NUMBER IS LISTED, YOU AND YOUR REPORTS ARE STILL ABOARD THE HIVE!)

(you’re on the ship, you’re vibing, whatever happened happened. (so the hell mushrooms, the space suits, those things are all still canon. the only reports i’ll reblog here though are ones that are DIRECTLY MAIN STORY relevant. don’t worry, the others absolutely still happened.)

ABOUT THE SHIP ITSELF:

The HIVE is a strange vessel, drifting through space with an undefined purpose beyond general exploration and sometimes various deliveries. Though typically harmless if not a little surprising, the hallways and doors occasionally do not lead where they’re supposed to — one might find themselves in the cafeteria when they meant to go to the deck, for example, or in the training room instead of the garden. Strangely, this only seems to happen in low-stress situations; perhaps the ship only finds it funny when the pranks won’t cause harm. Usually.

(at a meta level, the layout of the HIVE is purposefully left very vague to encourage interpretations. if there ever comes a time where there is an actual design for it, it’ll be placed here. in the meantime, we run on the spirit of improvisation. it’s like a video game, only we’re writing it in real time while the story plays in the background.)

TALES ABOARD THE HIVE TAG NAVIGATION GUIDE:

canon crewmate reports - canon submitted reports that either did happen or directly impacted the canon story. submitted by outside influences, like anons or other users.

canon HIVE adventures - interactive games/stories, usually involving polls that lead to different endings. experimental category, but a fun one.

canon HIVE art - comics, drawings, animatics, or anything else of the sort drawn or “canonized” by me. not everything i draw is canon, especially since the captain is also my sona character, so stuff that actually matters story-wise goes here ;;

canon tales aboard the HIVE - text-based stories and snippets written with no interactive elements, like one-shots.