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raeinyourdreams · 3 months ago

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'call it what you want.' | l.h x reader

pairings: logan howlett x sway!reader

tags: fluff, no established relationship but.. there's something there, mutant!reader (they call her sway due to her mutation.. i love her i wanna talk ab her someone PLEASE ASK AB HER), AFAB reader, she/her pronouns used for reader, no specific petnames for reader (just bub and her hero name.. gets called kid like twice), no use of y/n, written with x1/x2 logan in mind... sigh... save me x2 logan.. anyway, he gives reader his dog tags before a mission in case he.. you know.. so maybe angst? but only til the very end.

wc: 2k!!

a/n: OKAY SO BOOM! this is my first actual work that's not a drabble and i'm so anxious to post AAHHH, i got the inspo from a post i saw a while ago while fried as fuck from someone requesting a fic ab logan giving reader his dog tags, pref fluffy and angsty so i hope i did ur vision justice OP!! tysm for inspo, my reqs are always open 🫶🏻 also i know this is a very burnt card but if something in the wording is off lmk PLEASEE english isn't my first language 😭 anyway enough yapping plz enjoy!! any type of interaction is appreciated

'just know these are yours now.'

you've never seen him without his dog tags, he never took them off, not ever since the first time he came into the mansion. you'd been there the first time, you were a teacher in the school, and you'd seen him occasionally roam the halls and stay by the door, listening in on your class, quietly. but very rarely interacted otherwise, just a simple nod or a 'good morning' that he'd return out of good manners, but he'd mostly keep to himself.

you're a teacher. you're the fun teacher. at least that's what your coworkers seemed to agree upon, seeing how your students appeared to leave your classroom more cheerful than they entered. you'd be lying if you said you didn't use your mutation as an advantage in this situation, being able to read your students' moods every day, how they were feeling and why came insanely handy, especially when it came to giving each student the type of care they needed. which is why you were also a student counselor.

on the days you didn't teach, you'd put that psych degree to work and counsel. in your classroom filled with drawings and fairy lights and stained glass that looked straight from a fairytale, and a door you'd lock for privacy as a student came to confide in you.

obviously despite your title, it wasn't only students who'd come to your office to let a feeling go, teachers too, needed a space to blow off some steam, cry a little sometimes, because they knew you'd soothe them in the end, touch your hand feel the pain dissipate, make it seem as if they'd never felt that way.

up until now, only teachers and students seemed to come to you for help. teachers. and students.

so it did surprise you when the wolverine started showing up in your office after coming back.

"must be tiring. to handle others' emotions like your own all day." he'd say, sitting down on a chair, to which you'd playfully roll your eyes and shake your head. "i don't treat them as my own, i just do what i have to do so they feel better." you'd reply, walking towards the door to lock it out of policy. figured that he was here for counseling as well.

"you treat everyone with so much care it seems like it." he said, which made you stop in your tracks, turning heel to face him, your hair cascading on your shoulders and moving ever so softly as you spun. before you could speak, stunned, he asked again.

"don't you get tired? i mean mentally. it must take a toll on you to be around so many emotions all the time." the way he seemed to read you stunned you, he seemed like a very gruff, cold person from the brief interactions you'd had with him before. truth be told, this was the closest you'd been to logan since he came back to the mansion. it's what other people thought of him, anyway.

but you weren't other people, you were different.

the feeling in your body when you perceive others emotions is strange. you could never put it into words. your mutation was mostly contact based, a small brush of the hand was enough to let you know that person's feelings, the reason behind them, what they needed to feel better and it made it easier to help everyone. you could, however, see and feel the emotions, sometimes even smell them if they were too strong, no need for contact necessary.

with logan, you almost didn't need to be in the same room as him to feel the amount of physical, mental, emotional strain he was constantly under, his superhuman body subconsciously tuning it out, making him oblivious to it. once, after a very dangerous mission, he isolated himself in his room for days, his expression cold and unfazed, but every time you'd walk past an area he was in, the emotions hit you like a truck. so strong you even cried over pain that wasn't yours, a life you hadn't lived.

you looked at him sympathetically, taking a deep breath to concentrate less on the seemingly invisible fog around you two as you sat on the chair, your expression calm and collected. "i'm okay, i promise. thank you, logan."

"like hell you are." "neither are you."

he stays quiet at your retaliation, a weak smile forming on his lips, letting you understand that you were right, not that you needed confirmation.

sometimes, when emotions overpower you, you feel compelled to speak, give words of reassurance, even if you didn't quite know if they'd help or not. "logan, you should let people into your heart, stop living in fear.." you blurted out, unsure of why you were telling him this, but you'd learned to not question it and just speak, because it helped to just hear the words sometimes. it certainly did get you a reaction from logan, as the overbearing feelings you were perceiving faded.. briefly, before they slowly crept back into vision.

it was the faintest of reactions, but a reaction at least.

he nodded, taking in the words silently, as if he were contemplating. you remained stoic, analyzing his demeanor out of pure habit. "did.. you come here for counseling?" you asked, suddenly aware that you were still working, and you weren't even sure if he was here for another reason, or if he did need your help. instead, he shook his head, looking at you as if he were conducting an analysis of his own.

"nah, just came to see you.. sway."

a knock on the door interrupted the brewing tension, a gloomy, childlike presence behind the door, to which you looked at logan apologetically. "i'm sorry logan, i have a student to attend.. but think about what i said." you spoke softly, your warm voice reverberating in his ears like a hug.. something he longed for but couldn't bring himself to ask.

you started seeing him around the classroom more, or rather, he started seeking you out more. in between breaks, before his training, during counseling. it got to a point where your children started greeting him hello and goodbye if he was in the classroom, interacting with him, playing with his hair, always styled like kitty ears. the way he just smiled and let them made something in you bloom, a feeling you couldn't recognize in yourself, but it was pink and warm and fuzzy all over. you couldn't help but wonder if he felt about you this way, too.

slowly, you noticed how, little by little, the gloomy cloud surrounding him would go away when he entered the classroom, how it would be replaced with a pink haze when he looked into your eyes, or made you laugh.. it would quickly fade away, but you'd notice, and noticed how much it resembled that feeling inside you: pink and warm and fuzzy all over.

as time went by, you got used to seeing him around, swinging by your classroom as if it was his haven, a small break from the world he knew, because you were in it. you'd be lying if you said he didn't make you day too, the gloomy atmosphere that once came along with him every time he entered your classroom slowly changing into a lilac haze.

one day, he showed up as the kids were leaving for the day, no colored cloud, but something seemed off. you invited him to sit down as he locked the door after getting in, his expression serene. before you could even speak his hands were on you, pulling you close to him in a hug, and you swore you could feel him shaking slightly. the realization hits you like a bucket of cold water and you just hold him tighter to you, since it feels like the only correct thing to do.

"you're scared."

"no one gets to see me like this, so feel special." said he, almost as if he was confiding a secret in you, which he was.

"oh, trust me, i feel quite special." you replied jokingly, which caused him to let out a chuckle, though it was dull and almost no feeling was tied to it.

you two let go and you asked him what was wrong, and he opened up like it was routine.

"i leave tomorrow. there's a mission out of state and they're asking me to go.. might be off the grid after that for a while." he explained, his voice remained calm but his eyes seemed to reveal to you more of how he was actually feeling.

"i dunno.. thought someone should've known in case.. things go south." your expression changed at that, and logan noticed. "ah, c'mon bub, change that frown, it's just reality. sure, i might be a piece of work to kill but it doesn't mean i can't die."

the silence that fell upon the classroom as you two finished speaking made the words fall with more weight into your heart, it did little to nothing to comfort you as you came to terms with what he said. it shouldn't have been hard - he was just stating a fact -, but it didn't mean that it didn't cut deep for you. you opened your mouth to speak, unsure of what you were even going to say, but he quickly cut you off.

"logan-" "listen, bub, you told me to start letting people into my heart.. i'm letting you in."

slowly, his hands went to unclasp the chain that always dangled on his neck, dog tags adorning his neck with his names, his identities. you looked in awe as he held them out to you. "gimme your hand, kid." and surprisingly, you did as you were told, holding your hand out as he placed the piece on your hand, feeling the cold metal clink softly as it fell and heat up under the temperature of your palm. you looked up at him, unsure of what it meant, of what this changed between you two, but it felt undeniable, even if unspoken.

“now, these.. they’re very special, bub. a reminder of everything that happened that led to here.. and it’s leading me to you right now.” he explained. “feels right for you to have them, i guess.. keep them safe, kid.”

the silence that fell between you two again was more comfortable, filled with a newfound tension that left much to question, but it didn’t feel right to interrupt with all that noise yet. the only sound filling the room was the breathing and a faint humming of the white noise machine you kept in your room, next by the door. you opened up your mouth again, your mind utterly blank and filled with thoughts and questions at the same time, unsure of which one was going to breach through your mind to materialize out in the cold, tense air.

“.. why me? trust me, i’m flattered, but i’m no one special, logan..” you questioned, and it made him frown.

“you are special. you're special to me.” your eyes widened at the confession and you watched as a soft smile settled on his face, one that made your heart flutter with the sheer tenderness he held in his gaze. “call it what you want.. just know these are yours now.” he said it so calmly, you wouldn't have tought he was handing you his heart, placing it in soft, tender hands and pleading you to not break it, not change it, and instead embrace it and accept it as it came, rough around the edges.

with that, he stood up from the chair, took your hand to squeeze it briefly, and walked out of the room, not before looking back at you one last time, the heaviness that he carried as he entered the room seemingly gone, all that you could perceive was a haze, all too familiar, one that left as quick as it came as his eyes met yours.

pink, warm, and fuzzy all over.

additional author's note: BOOM SHAKALAKA I POSTED FINALLY!! i think it's a little rushed BUT!! it's cause i have a (smutty) part 2 planned for this HEHEJEHE i don't like writing (or reading) series bcs i get sad when they end but i just might.... hehehe... anyway pls lmk what u think!! or i kill off logan 🥰🥰 your choice 🥰🥰

taglist: @allen-444

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ellieputellas · 3 months ago

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puppy love | ona batlle x reader

headcanons — Ona Batlle as your first love You and Ona Batlle have been best friends since childhood, always knowing each other better than anyone else. But as the years pass, hidden feelings begin to surface, and what once felt like innocent puppy love starts to bloom into something more.

contains: 10k+ words, firstlove!Ona, artist!reader, fluff, childhood best friends, friends-to-lovers, longterm yearning, some angst... not too much i promise, occasional use of y/n, cursing masterlist | please do not repost or plagiarize this.

firstlove!Ona and you met when you were both 7 years old. She was a new student at your school. At first, she was quiet and reserved, which made you want to take her under your wing; something about her drew you in. So, you would hang out with her during recess and sit beside her during class. It took her some time to open up but you were determined to be her friend.

firstlove!Ona wasn’t sure what to think of you at first. She was used to being alone, content with her own company—until you came along, full of sunshine, with that gummy smile and endless yapping. You were the sunshine she needed in her life. She decided that maybe it wasn’t so bad having a friend.

firstlove!Ona admired everything about you. She loved how you always took charge of class activities, acted so mature and polite to your teachers, and did so well in art class, teaching her different coloring techniques. You were her idol, and she wasn’t shy about letting you know.

firstlove!Ona grew fiercely protective of you. You were sunshine and always full of smiles and giggles. You also loved dressing up to school, with big bows and multicolored clips all over your hair which, for some reason, meant all the lame, insecure boys in your school loved to pick on you. Ona decided that as long as she was around, no one would dull your sparkle.

firstlove!Ona kicked your bully in the nuts after he stole the new pretty, blue ribbon clips out of your hair, calling you lame and girly. He was older than Ona, taller than her too… but that didn’t stop her. She chased him to no end with the most frightening expression an eight-year-old could have.

You watched as the nine-year-old boy keeled over in pain as Ona stood close by, panting after she had run after him. The boy cried out as Ona smirked in satisfaction. "Don't ever mess with her again." She barked at him.

You rushed over to Ona. "Are you okay?" To which she just smiled at you genuinely and said, "Of course, I got your clips back."

firstlove!Ona would draw only two things in art class: you, or you and her together. The teacher would ask everyone to draw dinosaurs. She would draw you two as dinosaurs. Cat? You two riding a giant cat. Her family? Her family… with you inserted there somehow. A rainbow? You two underneath a rainbow.

firstlove!Ona didn't have a concept of a crush or romantic love back then. But all your teachers noticed just how much the little girl admired you.

firstlove!Ona would often insist that you play house with her. Your favorite part of playing house was cooking “food” with her, which was just the two of you mixing soap, coins, and loose beads in a large bowl. But, Ona’s favorite part of playing house was being the husband while you were the wife. She’d brush your hair and hold your hand because, to her, that’s what husbands did. And, whenever other kids tried to tell her that she couldn't be your husband because she was a girl, she'd threaten to kick their balls too.

firstlove!Ona loved your movie dates at her house, especially when you two watched Disney princess movies.

"Ona, you can be Princess Belle and I'll be Princess Ariel!" You said, playing pretend after watching Beauty and the Beast on one of your play dates. Ona frowned. "Ew, I don't want to be Belle!" You frowned back. "Why? She's so pretty, just like you!" You teased. "I don't want to marry a beast," She exclaimed. "And I don't want you to be Ariel 'cause that would mean you'll be a fish and I can't swim that well yet." You laughed. "Then what princesses do you want us to be, then?" "We should just be our own princesses with no fish and no beasts and no princes." She exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air and you looked at her like she was crazy. "No prince?" You frowned. "Can we be princesses with no prince?" "Yeah, duh! It's better to have no prince so we don't have to spend all our time kissing them and we can just play all day!" She exclaimed proudly.

firstlove!Ona was already very competitive at an early age. She was the best at playing tag in the playground, never letting anyone beat her. Well, except you. Even if you were almost twice as slow as she was, she would purposely slow down her pace just so you could catch up and tag her.

"It's so unfair when you two play." One of the kids in the playground said. "Ona always just lets you win." Ona frowned at her. "You're just bitter 'cause you run like a grandma." "Well, we still don't want you to join us anymore." The kid said, crossing her arms. "You're not our friend anymore." "Good! We'll go ahead and find friends who can run faster." Ona shouted.

firstlove!Ona loved to play football. She would move so well with the ball that the parents in the playground would think that she was older than she was. (You weren't as good as she was, but that was fine. You were more than happy being her cheerleader.)

firstlove!Ona hated it when the boys she played football with would say they had a crush on you. The more they said you were cute, the more she was determined to be better than them just so you would focus on only her and not on them.

firstlove!Ona's parents quickly realized how skilled she was in football and decided to enroll her in some basic classes near your school. She was excited but quickly got disappointed when she learned you weren't joining her.

"But why can't she join me?" One complained. Her parents sighed exasperatedly. "Ona, your best friend has other interests; you can't expect her to do everything you want to do." They tried to reason out to the eight-year-old. "And her mom already told me that she isn't interested in football." "But she likes being with me when I play football." She pouted. "She can just sit in the side of the field and watch me play." "Ona, her parents are not going to let her sit around all afternoon at the side of a field to watch you play. Besides, her mom said she's taking some art classes nearby so you can visit her after, okay?" Her mom explained to which Ona just scoffed.

firstlove!Ona started playing with local boy’s leagues in your town since there wasn't a local girl's team. She was starting to get more and more popular in school due to her football skills but she never wanted to hang out with anyone else except you.

firstlove!Ona secretly hated your new friends from art class. She hated how you had inside jokes that she never understood. She hated how you had matchy bracelets with some stupid girl named Carla. She hated how she saw Carla brushing your hair after your art class. She basically hated Carla ever since Carla bid you goodbye with a "Bye, Bestie!" which was off-limits to her. She was your best friend, not this stupid girl.

firstlove!Ona tolerated your art friends just so she could be around you. All the other girls tried to be nice to Ona too but they always did think she was kinda gross for always being covered in grass and mud, and that she was too clingy and possessive of you.

firstlove!Ona was invited to her first group sleepover for your ninth birthday. She hated it; it felt like your art friends were suddenly invading activities you used to do only with each other but since you liked them, she was forced to suck it up. They made you happy, at least.

"Let's play Truth or Dare!" Carla exclaimed. "I'll spin this bottle and if it lands on you, you choose truth or dare." All the girls chuckled and yelped, making Ona roll her eyes. She hated how shrill and loud your friends were. Much to Ona's surprise, the bottle spun to face her. She groaned, unwilling to play with her clueless nemesis Carla. "Truth, I guess." The girls all thought of their question. Your other friend Julia finally asked. "Who is your crush?" Ona looked confused. "My crush?" Julia nodded. "Crush means someone you like." “Oh yeah, I forgot what it meant.” Ona just shrugged. "I guess, then it's Y/N." The girls laughed as you awkwardly looked away from Ona, feeling a little bit shy and embarrassed. You didn't know why but her answer made you a bit flustered. Ona looked confused. "Why are you laughing?" "Crush means like-like, silly. Like someone you wanna marry or someone you wanna kiss." Carla explained. “Not just your best friend.” "Oh," Ona frowned. "Then it's still Y/N." The girls laughed again and you hid your face in your hands as you grew red at your best friend's answer. "It has to be a boy, Ona! You can't have a crush on a girl." Carla exclaimed, still chuckling. The other girls laughed, thinking Ona was stupid. But Ona genuinely met what she was saying. Ona gave her a stank face. "Then I don't have one, I guess."

firstlove!Ona felt shy after the whole Truth or Dare game. She decided to stay silent for the rest of the night, conscious of what she said around your friends. They already looked at her weirdly whenever she hung out with you after your art class with her muddy boots and grass-stained shorts. She didn't like how she felt like she had given them another reason to find her weird.

firstlove!Ona also felt shy about her gift after she had seen all of the drawings and friendship bracelets your friend had made for you. All she was able to prepare was a letter about how much she loved being your friend even if you liked drawing and she liked football. She tried to make it fancy with glitter and stickers but compared to your friend's gifts, it looked so messy.

"Ona, are you still awake?" You asked as you saw the girl standing by her overnight bag instead of beside you and the other girls, who were already drifting to sleep. You walked over to her to see the letter with purple glitter and Hello Kitty stickers all over it. "What's that?" Ona looked down shyly at it. "It's my gift... but I don't know if I want to give it to you. It's so ugly." You frowned. "No, it's not." You pouted. "Well, it's my birthday and you have to obey everything I tell you to do and I want you to give me your gift." Ona hesitated but decided that she wasn't one to go above birthday law so she handed it over. She watched you genuinely smile as she read your letter. It made her feel less insecure about it. You smiled at her, holding the letter to your heart, not caring about the glitter getting on your favorite unicorn pajamas. "Ona, this is my favorite gift ever." Ona beamed in joy. "Really?" "Well, duh! It's so sweet and I like the Hello Kitty stickers, especially this one where she has flowers." You pointed it out. You paused before continuing. "Also, I'm sorry my friends laughed when you said I was your crush. Honestly, I think you're my crush too." Ona felt her face get warm as you said it. "Oh... that's nice." She smiled. "Does that mean you're my girlfriend?" You thought about it, not sure exactly how it would work out. You’ve only heard about girlfriends and crushes from TV shows, and you've only ever seen girlfriends with boyfriends. "Is that allowed?" Ona frowned. "Why would it not be allowed?" You shrugged. You couldn't argue with that top-tier argument. "Okay, I can be your girlfriend."

firstlove!Ona went home after that sleepover, beaming to her parents that you were her girlfriend. Her mom tried to ask if she meant “girl-SPACE-friend” but Ona got mad, insisting that she actually meant girlfriend with no space and that you were going to get married.

firstlove!Ona grew fond of kissing your cheek and holding your hand. She was too giddy over the fact that you were her girlfriend. Even if she had no clue exactly how girlfriends worked, she was just happy because that meant you liked her more than you liked Carla, which was more than enough for her.

firstlove!Ona frowned when you tried to tell her that your parents said you were too young to be girlfriends and to understand what a relationship was.

“That’s stupid,” Ona complained. “We watched Hannah Montana. We saw her have a relationship. We totally get it!” You sighed, shaking your head in disapproval. “Yeah… but my mom said I have to wait until I’m in high school before I even think about dating.” “Fine, just as long as I’ll be your bestest friend, over anyone else.” She pouted, making you promise.

firstlove!Ona was getting so much attention for her football skills. By the time you were 10, there was not a single person in her age group in your town — boys and girls — that was on her level. It didn’t take long until everyone was talking about the tiny girl who played like a beast.

firstlove!Ona learned about different celebrations she could do online. She thought of which creative one she could do just in case she gets a goal. While watching a teen movie, she saw some guy playing basketball wink and blow a kiss at a girl he liked. Ona somehow decided that that was the coolest thing to do. So, she started being greedy with the ball and the goals, just so she could do her little loser-ish celebration and blow you a kiss.

firstlove!Ona naturally caught the attention of La Masia scouts. They would watch her games, taking several notes. Suddenly, football got serious for Ona. She would start training more and there was more pressure for her to perform well. It was more than the twelve-year-old girl could handle.

“What if I just give up?” Ona’s voice was barely a whisper, muffled by the blankets you both huddled under. Her words seemed to hang in the air, heavy and uncertain. You moved closer to her in the bed, resting on your side so that you would be facing her. Ona was resting on her back with her arm resting on her forehead. “I’m scared... I’m scared I’ll disappoint everyone, even if I train all day and barely get any rest. It feels like I’m not enough. Maybe this isn’t meant for me.” You frowned, feeling a knot tighten in your stomach. This wasn’t the Ona you knew; the Ona you knew never doubted herself and was confident almost to the point of cockiness. All the pressure seemed to be getting to her. “Quitting… but you love football? How can you possibly give up on it when you love it more than you love me?” You joked to lighten up the mood but Ona took it seriously and lightly smacked you as if to reprimand you. Ona turned on her side to face you and now you were both face-to-face. “But now… I don’t know. It feels like I’m not enjoying it anymore. I feel insecure.” Her voice shook a bit. It was hard seeing Ona like this. You had never seen her so… small. It was weird because Ona’s energy and passion was never small. Not even quiet, seven-year-old Ona acted like this. It hurt seeing your best friend struggle with something that she did so well. You reached over to gently touch her face. “Ona…” You started. “I know it’s hard… but everyone just has their eyes on you right now because of how good you are. These scouts and coaches from all over… they’re here because you are worth it. They wouldn’t be here if they didn’t believe in you.” ”And… even if they don’t pick you or even if you do decide to quit, I will be there. I’ll still be your number one cheerleader — on and off the pitch.” You smiled at her. “I’m here for you, no matter what.” And for the first time that evening, Ona gave you a small smile. It wasn’t the usual huge grin that was accompanied by a sparkle in her eyes, but it was something. And that was enough.

firstlove!Ona did the best she could in her next games and it showed. She was dynamite on that pitch and everyone just knew then that her future was secured.

firstlove!Ona started training in La Masia just before you two entered high school. She was still studying at your school but she was taking fewer classes and doing more training, which she didn’t mind. She was learning so much and improving exponentially, completely thriving on the pitch. Off the pitch, she was also doing pretty well. She made a bunch of friends from La Masia who she would enthusiastically tell you about whenever you got time together. The only thing Ona hated about being in La Masia was that so much of her life was now occupied by football. She'd wake up early to train, then it was class, then it was more training. She barely got time to be around you.

firstlove!Ona was so busy that she was one of the last people in sophomore year to find out about Pascual.

"Who the fuck is Pascual?" Ona asked your mutual classmate and friend, Julia. "Where did she meet him?" Julia rolled her eyes, realizing quickly that Ona had been busy for a while. "He's our classmate, Ona." She answered. "He's been our classmate since we were 10." Ona frowned. She never paid attention to the other people in class that much. She spent most of her time with you, after all. So, naturally, this Pascual guy was never on her radar. "And now what is it that I'm hearing that he's pursuing her? Who does he think he is?" Ona said loudly, not giving a fuck if anyone in the school hallway could hear. “Bet he’s like some lazy dumbass, just like everyone who has a crush on her.” "He's actually really nice and pretty smart. I know he even volunteers…” Julia went on and on talking about Pascual, seeming to approve of the guy for you. Julia noticed Ona clenching her jaw and frowning, causing her to roll her eyes. “He’s actually great, Ona. You're just too in love with your best friend for you to see that." Ona didn’t bother denying. She just rolled her eyes.

firstlove!Ona always knew she enjoyed being close to you, relishing the time spent together. She always knew she loved you… a lot… as a friend. But when the whole Pascual situation came to light, something shifted in her. She started to see you in a new light. Thoughts of you consumed her more and more, and with them came feelings she hadn’t anticipated—jealousy, possessiveness, clinginess. It was as though her obsession with you, something she’d always brushed off as just what best friends felt, was now much more intense, more undeniable. What once felt natural, and familiar, had become charged with a different kind of energy. It just felt… different.

Ona and you sat side by side, eyes glued to the screen as you both watched the new MTV show your friend had recommended. Ona shifted uncomfortably, clearly awkward about watching a show centered on two childhood best friends who’d started dating, especially with everything running through her mind lately. “Karma’s kinda annoying, not gonna lie,” you said, crunching on a chip. “Like, Amy’s so obviously in love with her, and Karma still doesn’t get it. How can she be that oblivious?” Ona’s gaze flickered toward you for a moment. She bit her lip, her expression thoughtful. “Yeah… so clueless.”

Later that night, Ona and you lay cuddled up in bed, updating each other about each other’s lives. You’d both been pulled in different directions by your hectic schedules, but you always made the most of the time you had together, finding ways to stay close even when things got busy. “And, my friend invited me to volunteer as an art teacher at the orphanage where he volunteers at. So, I might try to do that soon.” You shared, humming thoughtfully. “I’m thinking of doing it soon. He said I’d be really good with the kids.” The words hung in the air, and Ona’s mind immediately went to what Julia had said about Pascual. So, is she hanging out with this guy? Does she like him? “Hmm? Which friend?” Ona asked as she knitted her eyebrows together as she tried to keep her voice casual. You noticed the change in her expression immediately. You two had been friends for so long that you could always tell when something was on her mind. “Pascual, from class,” you replied, keeping your tone light. “You should come too, teach football and stuff. The kids would love it.” Ona nodded, but her gaze remained distant, still thinking about that Pascual guy. You chuckled to lighten the mood before reaching out to touch her arm. “I’m sure the kids would love to be around a future football star.” She rolled her eyes and chuckled, all thoughts of Pascual fading away. “You think too highly of me.” She responded, trying to play it cool but the pink on her cheeks gave her away. “But sure… I’d love to volunteer.” ”Look at us both, a couple of philanthropists.” You joked. “Who would have thought the same Ona that kicked kids in the nutsack would be volunteering?” Ona smiled and sighed. “You know, I have this new friend from La Masia who would be so into volunteering too.” She brought up thoughtfully. “Maybe I should invite her to join us.” “Ooh, is she the girl you said who plays really well?” You asked and Ona’s eyes sparkled. Ona nodded. “Aitana’s like next level on the pitch. She literally plays like Iniesta,” She gushed. “And even outside the sport, she’s so amazing. She’s, like, their class top student and she reads so many books…” You hummed, thinking about how Ona used to gush about you like that before. Now, it was some girl named Aitana. So, now, it was your turn to be jealous.

You lay on your side with your back turned to Ona, trying to drift to sleep. But no matter how much you closed your eyes, your mind was still buzzing with thoughts: the show you’d watched, the conversation about volunteering, the conversation about Ona’s new idol from La Masia, and just... everything. You haven’t done a sleepover with Ona in a while and all these thoughts paired with her proximity were just making your hormones go haywire for no reason. “You awake?” You turned around, surprised to find Ona’s eyes wide open, staring up at the ceiling. She looked over at you, her expression soft but thoughtful. You gave her a small smile. “Yeah…” She hummed, eyes flickering in consideration before she finally spoke. “How about you cuddle up to me? You always said my warmth makes you feel drowsy.” She offered nervously. “I could use some of your warmth too.” Her offer was light and casual but Ona was actually feeling nervous as she said it. Ona’s arms had been craving your presence ever since she got to your house but she was afraid it would be too awkward to just hug you or cuddle with you. She knew she was being ridiculous because you two used to literally live in each other’s hugs. Lately, though, everything felt different. The emotions and feelings swirling inside her were more intense and mixed with the strange rush of puberty, it made her feel shy and unsure. But she still couldn’t resist it; she missed having you pressed against her. You nodded, beaming. “I’d love that.” You shifted closer, resting your head against her chest. Ona wrapped her arm around you, pulling you in, and you instinctively placed your hand on her stomach. It was a simple gesture, but it made her acutely aware of the connection between you both—each touch felt loaded with meaning. Once she had gained enough confidence, she started brushing your hair with her hand, her gentle fingers soft against your scalp. “Remember when we used to be girlfriends…” She asked with a light tone. “We had no clue what we were talking about but I genuinely was so into it.” You laughed at that childhood memory. “Yeah, my mom was so confused when I told her.” You recalled. “She really had to sit me down and explain what the difference between girl friends and girlfriends was.” Ona chuckled at that, the sound warm and relaxed, but then fell quiet for a moment. You could feel her hesitating like she was choosing her words carefully. “Do you think you’d ever have a relationship? Like, with a boyfriend or... a girlfriend?” She asked it so casually, but you could sense the weight behind her question. Especially with the way her voice trailed off towards the end. You’d never really talked about your sexualities, and the last time crush you had, as far as Ona remembered, was on the lion from Lion King from when you were both seven. So, it always left her curious but afraid of asking you about it… afraid that it would make her have to talk about her own sexuality which she never really wanted to think about. ”Hmm, I don’t know. There isn’t really anyone I like.” You responded vaguely. “Why? Do you like someone?” You waited with bated breath. You didn’t know for sure what you wanted to hear but it still made you anxious. Unbeknownst to you, Ona was sharing the same nervous feeling that you felt. She wondered if you could hear her heartbeat against her chest. “Uh…” She started, her voice faltering. “No one.” She sounded unconvincing which you took note of but you didn’t push any further. Huh, could it be that Aitana girl? “But I’m glad you’re my first relationship, even if it wasn’t a real one,” Ona said, going back to your conversation about your childhood memory. “That just means whoever comes next is still the second.” You rolled your eyes, the slight jealousy you felt fizzling out. She was the same, old possessive best friend you had, and somehow, that brought you comfort.

firstlove!Ona felt annoyed whenever she would see you with Pascual. She hasn’t felt that jealous and possessive over you since Carla from your art school. It was obvious to everyone how much Ona hated Pascual, bullying him for seemingly no reason. Well, obvious to everyone but you.

Ona seethed when she saw you sitting with him during lunch. Without a second thought, she stormed over to your table, where you were laughing with Pascual and the rest of your friends. Ignoring everyone, she fixed her gaze on him, her jaw clenched. She tilted her head slightly to the side, gesturing for him to move, as if the space beside you was her birthright. “Move,” She ordered in a low voice. “That’s my seat.” Pascual was used to Ona’s possessiveness. He knew how clingy she could be, and to be honest, he never minded when she wasn’t around—because that meant more time to get to know you. But when Ona was around, he knew he would not have the opportunity to get a word in without Ona basically glaring daggers at him. He sighed, trying to keep his cool. “I got here first.” “Tell it to someone who cares,” Ona shot back. Pascual muttered under his breath, but he gave in, scooting over to the other side of the table with a resigned sigh. Meanwhile, you were oblivious to the silent war playing out just inches away. You smiled at Ona, wrapping your arms around her in a warm hug. “Ona, I missed you,” you murmured, completely unaware of the charged atmosphere. Ona, however, didn’t take her eyes off Pascual. Her lips curled into a small, almost imperceptible smirk as she raised her eyebrows, silently daring him to say something. It was clear she wasn’t just competing for a seat.

On another occasion, Ona leaned uncomfortably close to Pascual as he tried to focus on drawing you. Pascual automatically stiffened up to Ona hovering around him again. She was always like this whenever she was around — too intrusive, too intimidating, too there. What made it worse was that Ona had just come from training, her freshly showered hair still damp, and the droplets were slowly dripping onto Pascual and his sketchbook. Each drop seemed to drive him a little mad, the cold wetness only adding to his growing irritation. Pascual looked up at Ona and gave her an incredulous look. “What, Ona?” “Huh,” Ona said, eyeing the drawing with exaggerated curiosity. “Who is that supposed to be?” Pascual sighed, exasperatedly as he pointed at you who was sitting across the table too focused on your own drawing. “Isn’t it obvious?” Ona huffed, pretending to think. The drawing was pretty decent — better than she could ever do — but she was never going to let him know that. Instead, she narrowed her eyes at the sketch and loudly asked. “Why’d you give her a fivehead? You hate her or something?” You looked up curiously, previously oblivious to the exchange. Ona was giving you an innocent smile while Pascual was trying hard not to snap at your best friend as he muttered. “It’s just the angle.”

The poor guy liked you so much, even though you were completely oblivious to his advances. And despite your best friend making his life a living hell at every opportunity, he still tried—harder than anyone could’ve expected. Ona skipped obnoxiously to where you were sitting in the front of the class, beside Pascual. It didn’t help that he always ended up next to you. That was another reason Ona couldn’t stand him. She was always a little late to class because of her training, so the seats were usually already taken by the time she arrived. And today, of course, you were stuck with him. “Congrats on getting the best grade!” Ona chirped, throwing her arm around your shoulders before plopping herself down in your lap. "You're so smart. I’m so proud to be your best friend.” Pascual couldn’t help but roll his eyes at her usual attempt to rattle him. He was used to it by now, but that didn’t make it any easier. Ona caught the eye roll, and a mischievous spark lit up in her eyes. She glimpsed at the paper on his table, snatching it without his permission. "Huh," she said, examining the grade with exaggerated interest, "87... that's nothing compared to my best friend’s 95." She flashed a knowing smile at him. "Guess she’s too smart for you, huh?" Pascual frowned but grew flustered by the comment. “I distributed the papers and saw you got an 83 so…” He wanted to snap back but it came out softer and meeker than he intended. Ona just smirked, taunting him. “And what about it?” Pascual opened his mouth, ready to fire back, but stopped himself. He could’ve said something—he could’ve retorted—but he didn’t. Instead, he looked at you, your smile more than enough to make him swallow his pride. He knew better than to engage in one of Ona’s little mind games, especially when she was already enjoying herself. He had been working so hard on making his slow courtship of you for a year and there was no way he was going to blow it now.

firstlove!Ona was pretty content with how clueless you were with Pascual. At first, it did anger her whenever he was around, always so desperate for your attention. But now, it brought her happiness whenever she’d go to you and he was around because that meant it was another opportunity to embarrass him in front of you. Although, you never really minded their interactions, chalking it up to just banter, even going as far as to cluelessly think they were starting to be friends.

firstlove!Ona was practically seething when she got to school and saw Pascual hovering over your locker, presenting you with a red rose. She looked at your face with your doe-eyed expression and your cheeks flushed, shocked by a friend’s sudden confession. Ona had to take herself out of the scene, knowing she would react badly if she let herself watch it unfold.

firstlove!Ona finally stopped running from her thoughts, forcing herself to confront the feelings she’d been denying for so long. She’d always laughed off the jokes about her being in love with you. She never really thought too much about it, chalking it up to just banter. But now, seeing the way he looked at you—seeing how she felt when he did—it hit her harder than she expected. She wasn’t just annoyed that some guy liked you. She was hurt. And it wasn’t just about friendship jealousy—it was something deeper, something that made her feel exposed, vulnerable, like a part of her she’d never wanted to face was staring back at her, undeniable.

firstlove!Ona decided that tormenting the guy who liked you wasn’t going to be enough. This time, she actually wanted to show you that she could be better was better than him. She wanted to splurge on a bouquet of flowers but she had already blown her allowance on new football socks. So, instead, she hopped the neighbor's fence just to pick flowers from their large garden. She could get in trouble but she didn't care. She wanted to give you a bouquet of flowers that would put Pascual’s rose to shame.

The first thing you noticed when Ona came over to your house for your study date was the beautiful array of flowers she had tied together with a ribbon. You gushed at the different flowers — lavenders, marigolds, poppies. They were so stunning. “W-what? These are so stunning! What is this for?” She'd smirk and shrug, nonchalantly as she unconsciously tried to hide the scratch on her arm she got from scraping it on the fence after the neighbor's dog chased her out of the garden. “Just wanted to show my appreciation for you.” The blush on your cheeks grew and you quickly turned around to hide it from Ona. “Let me put this in a vase. Hold on.” You said as you scurried. Ona casually followed you to the kitchen, looking around your house to see if you had a rose displayed anywhere. “So, I heard Pascual gave you a rose the other day.” You paused, feeling odd that she was suddenly bringing it up after she had brought you a bouquet. “Yeah, it was weird.” You said, shivering from the recollection of the awkward interaction.” She practically beamed at your response. “Yeah?” “Yeah, I had no clue he liked me. I genuinely thought he was just around me because he was sad and had no friends.” You responded honestly as you filled a vase with water. “I had to give the rose to Julia just cause I felt weird bringing it home with me.” You sighed. “Anyway, I don’t wanna talk about it. I just feel bad for the poor guy but also… grossed out, y’know.” You said frankly. Ona couldn’t hide her smile, shaking her head. She couldn’t believe how clueless you were with him but she was still happy now that she knew Pascual was finally out of the picture.

firstlove!Ona moved out of your school during your junior year, a decision driven by her desire to focus more on her football career. She was fully immersed in the La Masia system now—training with some of the best, living and breathing the game. At first, it felt like a punch to the gut, not seeing your best friend every day. But you quickly realized it wasn’t all bad. If anything, it meant Ona was on the rise, becoming a bigger deal with each passing day, and that was something to be proud of. Besides, no matter how packed her schedule was, Ona always made time for you. The moment her training sessions ended, she’d sprint to your school, barely taking a breath. firstlove!Ona was slowly becoming a football celebrity in your community. Now, whenever she’d visit school, there were people always hovering around you to get a glimpse of the U17 Spain player. It made you proud. But… you didn’t like how girls were always fawning over her. They would be running to you in school, asking you if Ona was single. Whenever you two were out, there was always someone making eyes at your best friend. It was amusing, at first. Then it got repetitive and annoying, always leaving you feeling uneasy.

“Hi, Ona. My friend is, like, a really big fan.” A girl said to Ona, completely not even acknowledging your presence. She pointed back to their table across the restaurant where a bunch of other girls were giggling. “She was wondering if she could ask for your number.” Ona looked over to the table and saw a pretty girl with long brown hair waving back at her. It was undeniable she was stunning but Ona just... wasn’t that interested. She was here to have dinner with you after all. And to her, there wasn't anyone else more stunning than you. Ona shot a look at you, gauging your reaction. But to you, it read differently. You thought Ona didn’t want to give her number out because you were there. You shrugged awkwardly at her. “Go ahead, Ona. She looks cute.” Ona awkwardly chuckled, not sure how to feel about it. She was honestly kind of disappointed that you even encouraged her to do it. “Oh, uh okay…” She said, causing the girl to smile widely and jump up. You looked down at your salad bowl, suddenly losing interest. "Here, I'll write it down and tell her to text me that she's the girl from the restaurant or whatever."

Ona was driving you home after the dinner. After she gave out her number, you grew quiet, not wanting to talk much about anything anymore. She was confused as to why you were suddenly acting out when you didn’t seem to be affected by it initially. Could she be jealous? Ona looked over to you. You were staring out of the window, silent. But, why would she be jealous? “So…” Ona said cautiously, drumming her fingers on the driver’s wheel. “I assume the salad was bad?” You just hummed out a response, not even bothering to look at her. You sighed. “You should have just let me go ahead,” You said, shifting awkwardly in your seat. "I told you I could have just taken the bus." She frowned. “Why would I let you take the bus?” ”You could have stayed and chatted with those girls.” You muttered under your breath. “That would have made them real happy." To your shock, Ona chuckled. You turned to her and saw the expression on her face. She looked amused. You looked at her questioningly and she just shook her head, smiling. “What?” “Nothing,” She smiled, locking eyes with you. “You’re just being cute right now." You blushed and looked away, feeling your heart thump faster at how she looked at you. Ona chuckled at your reaction and said. "Glad to know I'm not the only jealous, possessive one..." And just like that, you knew that she knew.

firstlove!Ona knew at that moment that you shared the same attraction she had for you. She didn’t know how serious it was on your end but it was just satisfying to know that her feelings (or at least, her attraction) were somehow reciprocated. A year ago, she had finally come to terms with the truth: she had a crush on you. At first, the idea of being in love with her best friend had felt confusing, almost impossible to process. But over time, she stopped fighting it. She had always loved you and that never seemed to get in the way. Why should it now? firstlove!Ona was just pissed off that you have avoided her ever since that night in the car. She didn’t say anything other than you were cute for being jealous but the feeling of being caught was too much for you to confront; you hadn’t even fully accepted the fact that you were down bad for your best friend and she was already figuring out?!

Julia laughed as you told her the story about that night, clearly amused by your confusion. You hadn’t known who else to turn to; you figured your mutual friend of nearly a decade might have some valuable insight. She shook her head, a teasing smile tugging at her lips. “Yeah, we all saw this coming. Honestly, I’m surprised it took you two a decade to figure it out.” She shared. “I was going to push your heads together if it took any longer.” You groaned, frustration creeping into your voice. “What does that even mean? How could you know when I’m not even sure myself if I have a crush on Ona, or if it’s just some weird version of best friend clinginess?” Your friend raised an eyebrow, leaning back on the bed’s headboard. “Did you feel this way about me when I had to spend a semester in Granada with my grandmother?” She challenged your theory. “And were you suddenly jealous when I came back and started dating Carla?” You paused. “No…” “Then obviously, it isn’t just some sort of friendship clinginess.” Your friend explained it to you. “I’ve known you two since we were children and I genuinely think I learned the concept of crushes because of you and Ona.” “What do you mean?” You asked, falling backward on your bed and covering your head with a pillow. Julia’s voice softened, but there was a certain conviction in it. “Ona practically walked around with heart eyes for you. And you—well, you ignored every boy who liked you. You just wanted to be around Ona. All the time.” She smirked, though there was a hint of exasperation in her tone. She reached over to grab the pillow off your head to stare you down, making sure every point she said was heard. “I seriously reached a point where I was fed up with you two. It felt like I was third-wheeling 24/7.” You knit your eyebrows together as you listened to your friend. “But what do I do now? I obviously can’t go to my best friend and tell her I like her? I don’t even know that for sure.” ”Look,” Julia said, looking you straight in the eyes. “You have to realize that there has to be a reason that, after all these years, after all of the boys who courted you, you never seemed interested in any of them. You always just wanted to be around Ona. All the time” You fell quiet, thinking it over. Everything she was saying was true. You never had a crush in your life. You never showed interest in anyone. Whenever someone asked where you’d see yourself years from now, you often would mention still being best friends with Ona. It had to mean something. Julia squeezed your hands gently, her voice earnest. “There’s a reason for that, you know?” You stayed silent for a while before sighing. “But… what if I’m wrong? What if I tell her I like her, and it turns out it’s just some kind of puppy love? What if I lead her on?” Julia sighed, the sound filled with both frustration and understanding. She took your hands in hers, her grip firm. “It would break Ona’s heart, yeah. But honestly…” She paused, looking you dead in the eye. “I think Ona’s always been preparing for that possibility. She knows what’s at stake, and she’d rather give it a chance than keep guessing. I’m sure she doesn’t want to spend another 17 years second-guessing herself.” Your heart ached at the thought of breaking Ona’s heart, but Julia’s words carried a certain truth that you couldn’t ignore. Judging by Julia’s statements, Ona had more to lose in this; you could easily break her heart. But that didn’t mean it was exactly riskless for you. Julia’s gaze softened. “You owe it to both of you to take the chance. You need to allow Ona to love you without that barrier of friendship between you two. If it doesn’t work out, at least you tried, right?” You nodded, making it a silent promise to yourself that you would take your emotions seriously and that you would be honest with Ona once you got the chance. You looked up at your friend. “Julia, promise not to tell her... while I'm not ready yet, at least?" "Ugh, fine but if you two get married, I get to tell everyone how dumb you two were," Julia said with an eye roll.

firstlove!Ona was clueless about your emotions, second-guessing herself after the whole interaction. Did she make a mistake in thinking you were interested in her? Did she completely fumble the bag? She had no clue how to go about it until she realized she could bait you into revealing yourself. firstlove!Ona started sharing more and more photos of her and Aitana, trying to see how you would react. She would post photos of them in training, eating ice cream after school, hugging each other after a game. She’d try so hard to get a reaction but you never seemed to mind. In fact, it felt like you were back to your clueless self, oblivious to what she was trying to do. It was obvious to everyone just what Ona was trying to do, even Aitana called her out on it, saying she was done with being used as bait for her crush. It probably would have worked for someone who wasn’t you. firstlove!Ona didn’t know that it was working but not in the way she wanted to. You did get jealous but instead of thinking that Ona was trying to make you jealous, you thought that she was moving on. You thought she had finally found someone who liked her and wasn’t afraid to admit it just at the very moment that you were gearing up to confess. You started avoiding her, restricting her from all your social media just so that you would see less of her with her new crush. You decided that you would only reach out once you’re ready to talk it out with her. But for now, you had to shut her out. firstlove!Ona got an angry call from Julia as soon as she woke up, one random day.

“Are you and Y/N seriously still not talking?” Julia’s voice blared through the phone, loud enough to make Ona wince. Ona blinked away the sleepiness, squinting at the clock beside her bed. “Julia, it’s three in the morning,” she groaned, rolling over and burying her face in her pillow. “I’ve got training in two hours. Couldn’t this have waited?” Julia groaned back. “Do you even remember what day it is today?” Ona blinked, trying to shake off the fog in her mind. “Uh… Tuesday?” ”ONA BATLLE, IT’S YOUR FRIENDSHIP ANNIVERSARY.” The frustrated girl shouted over the phone, causing Ona’s phone speaker to crackle at the volume. “And you two haven’t said a word to each other in A MONTH!” Ona winced, groaning into the phone. “Great. Thanks for the reminder.” She let out a long sigh, dragging herself upright. “But, how is it exactly my fault? She’s the one who has been dodging my calls? Why should I try to make the first move in greeting her when she hasn’t even reached out to me at all?” Ona rubbed her forehead in frustration, trying to calm herself down. Once she spoke again, her voice was quieter, more defeated. “I’ve tried, Julia. I’ve been trying for years. But… I’m tired now.” “I’m just… trying to adjust with being okay with being just friends again.” Ona continued silently. “I can’t chase after nothing forever, Julia. I don’t have it in me anymore. It’s been ten years. I can’t keep chasing after her anymore. At some point, I have to stop.” Another long pause. Ona thought maybe Julia had hung up, but then, her friend spoke again—quiet, almost reluctant. “I promised not to say anything but obviously, I was stupid for promising that.” Julia muttered, the words heavy with something Ona couldn’t quite place. “But… it’s not nothing, Ona.” Ona furrowed her brows, feeling a pang of confusion. “What are you talking about?” Julia groaned, exasperated. “Ugh, I’m done dealing with both of your oblivious and mopey asses. I’ve done my part and it’s too much already. You two figure it out yourselves.” Before Ona could respond, the line went dead. Julia had hung up.

firstlove!Ona couldn’t get Julia’s words out of her head. It’s not nothing. She had no fucking clue what Julia meant exactly but there was a part of her that couldn’t help but wonder if that meant that you… No, we’re not going through another round of what-ifs, Ona. She said to herself. Focus on training now and berate Julia to be more clear later.

firstlove!Ona couldn’t keep herself focused no matter what. In the morning, she practically missed every instruction her coach said. In class, she spaced out during Spanish lessons that she hadn’t noticed the teacher was already growing red in the face, trying to catch her attention, until Aitana basically kicked the back of her seat. It was so bad that her coach sent her home, refusing to include her in afternoon training until she sorted herself out.

firstlove!Ona headed home that day, feeling defeated. She thought about you the entire day but still couldn’t come to a conclusion as to what Julia meant, and what she wanted to do with your relationship now. Sure, what Julia said gave her hope but that quickly fizzled out every time she would check her phone and there was not a single notification from you. She obviously was misreading the situation yet again. Was this the end of the line for the two of you?

firstlove!Ona stormed into her house, practically stomping in frustration.

“Ona?” Her mother called from the living room as Ona slammed the door behind her. “Why are you home so early?” Ona sighed, already feeling the weight of the day pressing down on her. “Coach sent me home,” she muttered, not bothering with any excuses. “Didn’t do well in training. Couldn’t concentrate.” Her mom looked at her sympathetically. “Aw, my baby.” She started toward Ona, arms open for a hug, but Ona remained rooted to the spot. “Does this have anything to do with—” ”Let’s not talk about her right now, please.” She cut in, her voice low but firm. Her mom pouted, looking at her daughter with careful eyes.“You two are best friends. It’s really sad that you’re not talking anymore, especially when I practically raised her like my own.” She smiled wistfully. “I even know what kind of juice she likes and doesn’t like.” Ona winced at the memories. “I… I don’t wanna think about her for now.” She said with a strained voice. There was a long pause as her mom considered her words. Then, after a beat of awkward silence, she hesitated before speaking again. “Hmmm, well, then you might not want to go upstairs to your room.” Ona’s eyes widened. “Mom… what did you…” Her mother’s eyes softened, but there was a hint of guilt there. “If you don’t want to talk to her right now, I can just send her home, sweetheart.” She offered gently, but her voice carried a subtle note of apology. Ona groaned, rubbing her face with both hands. The last thing she wanted was to confront this right now, but she knew she couldn’t keep avoiding it. She needed to face the situation head-on. “No, it’s fine,” she said, her voice quieter now, resigned. “I’ll… talk to her.” Her mother nodded, her face filled with understanding. “You know I’m here if you need me.” She gave her daughter a soft smile before walking away. Ona stood there for a moment, collecting herself, steeling her nerves for what was coming. She wasn’t ready, but maybe she never would be. She still had to face the situation eventually. Might as well get it over and done with.

firstlove!Ona didn't know how to talk to you. She didn't know how to face you after you two haven't talked in a month, which was basically centuries in best friend time. She didn't know how you'd react to seeing her again. Were you pissed off? Sad? She sighed, knowing she wouldn't find out until she opened that door.

The door creaked open and you nearly jumped off of the edge of Ona's bed. You waited with bated breath for her to enter, feeling yourself grow anxious. You finally see her. You didn't know why but you expected her to look different even if it had only been just a month; she still looked like the same Ona you knew, except maybe a bit tanner. You cleared your throat, feeling uneasy as she entered, closing the door behind her. "Hey…" You said with a soft voice. Ona leaned her back against the door, crossing her arms across her chest. "Hey." She responded with a cold voice, avoiding eye contact. You bit your lip, hesitant about what to say. "I haven't seen you in a while…" You started. "Julia told me you were doing even more training since you're gearing up for some big game." Ona just nodded, keeping her eyes on the floor. Again, you two fell silent, filling the room with words left unsaid. "Ona…" You started again, choosing your words carefully. "I'm really sorry I haven't reached out in a month. I really should have said something instead of just disappearing on you." Still, she didn’t respond. You exhaled shakily and pressed on. “I just… I didn’t know what to do.” Ona’s brow furrowed slightly at your words, but her eyes remained distant. “That night we had dinner…” you hesitated. “Even before that, I’d already been feeling weird... no, not just weird... insecure.” Her gaze finally lifted, confusion evident. “Why?” You rubbed your arm nervously, your words faltering. “I felt like we were drifting apart. You were spending so much time away from me, and then… then you were giving girls your number.” You paused, your throat tightening suddenly. “I know it sounds stupid, but I felt upset. I thought maybe you were going to forget about me when you got famous or that we wouldn't be friends anymore.” Ona’s jaw tightened, and she muttered under her breath, “Bullshit.” “What?” you asked, blinking in surprise. “You can’t even tell me what you’re really feeling,” Ona said, shaking her head. “Besides, I don’t know why it’s such a big deal that I gave someone my number. You told me to do it. And then, when I realized and pointed out that you weren't being genuine about wanting me to give my number, somehow I became the bad guy.” You sighed, feeling the guilt twist in your chest. “I wasn’t upset with you.” “Then why?” She looked at you with an almost pleading look. “I was upset with myself,” you admitted. The words felt heavy. “I hated how I reacted, how I got upset that you had realized what I was feeling... and I hated that I didn’t understand why I did react like that.” Ona tilted her head, her eyes narrowing. “And why did you?” You hesitated, biting your lip. Then, softly, you confessed, “I was jealous. I didn’t even know why at first… I just was.” Her expression shifted, cautious but curious. “And it wasn’t just that,” you continued. “I felt the same way whenever you talked about Aitana. I know how ridiculous it sounds, but I couldn’t help it." You sighed, running a hand through your hair. "When you started posting all those pictures of you two, I felt like I was being replaced. And instead of talking to you, I just… shut down.” Ona sighed, her voice quieter now. “Look, about Aitana—” You cut her off, shaking your head. “No, I got it. Instantly got it." You said. "And, I saw you two playing online last week. She’s amazing. I’m happy for you both." Ona laughed dryly, catching you off guard. “I’m not dating Aitana.” “What?” you asked, completely thrown. She shifted uncomfortably, rubbing her arm. “I only posted those pictures to get your attention. To make you jealous.” Your brows furrowed in disbelief. “Why would you want to make me jealous?” Ona scoffed, her lips curling into a small, bitter smile. There was a moment of silence before she looked at you again, locking eyes. “I think you know why.” Her voice came out low and quiet as if she didn't want you to hear.

Silence stretched between you, thick with unspoken feelings. “I mean,” you stammered, trying to piece your thoughts together. You were just stumbling with your words. “If you had started dating, I would’ve congratulated you. Aitana seems like a great person, and you two would—” “Are you trying to push me toward someone else again?” Ona interrupted, shaking her head as she looked down with a dry laugh. You raised your hands defensively. “Sorry, sorry. I’m just… I’m still figuring all of this out.” You sighed, running a hand through your hair. “I’ve thought about us a lot over the past month—how I feel about you, about us.” Her eyes softened, but her guard didn’t drop. “Then, why didn’t you answer any of my calls?” “Because I was scared,” you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. Her stare was making you nervous. “I thought if I talked to you, I’d lose focus. I wouldn’t be able to sort out my feelings and I'd just fuck up. But I'm glad I took my time...” “And what now?” Ona asked, her voice cautious. “I realized that I like you,” you said, the weight of the confession lifting slightly from your chest. "I like you beyond just as friends." Ona’s eyes widened, but she stayed silent, waiting for you to continue. You took a deep breath, letting the words spill out. “I feel so stupid for not realizing sooner. You’ve been so obvious about it, but I was clueless. And worse, I didn’t even know my own feelings.” You laughed bitterly. “I’ve always liked you, Ona. But I never thought of it as a crush because… well, we’ve always been so close. It felt like we were already together. I never thought I’d have to say it out loud.” You swallowed the lump forming in your throat before continuing. "And, I was scared that if I had said something, it would do more bad than good." You confessed, being completely vulnerable. "We already were there for each other all these years. I was scared that if I had said anything before, it would drive you away and I would lose you. And I didn't want to lose you." Ona stepped closer, her expression unreadable. “And now? What are you trying to say?” Your lips trembled as you laughed nervously, tears stinging your eyes. “I’m asking if you still want to be my best friend, even after everything I said." Ona’s face fell, disappointment flashing in her eyes. “Oh.” “But—” You reached for her hand with some hesitation. “I also want you to know that I think I might be in love with you." Her lips parted in surprise, her breath catching. Slowly, Ona stepped closer, her eyes searching yours. A smile grew on her face as she took your face in her hand. Without another word, she leaned in, her lips confidently capturing yours. It felt firm and sure as if answering you without using words. Just like that, your insecurities melted away. Suddenly, everything was back to before. No, it's even better than before. It was what you've always wanted, even back when you didn't know that you wanted it yet. When she pulled away, her lips curled into a small, teasing smile. She looked at both your eyes and you gazed into hers, taking in the moment between you. Ona chuckled. “Took you long enough.”

a/n: my first fluff fic <3 please be nice. i appreciate reblogs, comments, likes and messages or requests! i'm open to following this fic up if i get enough inspiration later on <3 taglist: @allaboutnayeli @shayepe @tsaynsp @acrypa24 @iliketozoneout @yapileon @kelseyaparker19 @wosocity @pitchsidestories @micaluvssoccer @lenorelovesgirls @marialife03 @jana22188

#Spotify #ona batlle fanfics #ona batlle fics #ona batlle fanfic #ona batlle x reader #ona batlle fluff #ona batlle x y/n

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reneesghostinthelivingroom · 10 months ago

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glad someone is doing Heathers the fandom has been starved. Could you do Heather Chandler x Fem!reader. Could be like strangers to lovers, idc the fandom needs more lol.

Tipsy Hook Ups||

|| Heather Chandler x fem!reader

|| Warnings: swearing, house party, underage drinking mentions, characters get drunk, heather hooks up with reader while drunk (nothing overly detailed)

|| Summary: Reader gets spotted by Heather M and the two become fast friends, resulting in reader joining the Heathers & Veronica. Heather M invites Reader to a house party where drunk!Heather Chandler hooks up with drunk!Reader.

Requests open!

Started: April 19th

Finished: April 21st

~~~

You and Heather Chandler couldn't be any further from different. While she was popular and hot, you were more artsy and "weird". At least, that's probably how she would look at you. You spent most of your time either in the library or art room, places you were sure Heather Chandler would avoid.

And it worked. For a while.

She had no idea who you were.

Until one day she noticed you. That annoying Monday morning where you had decided to situate yourself just below your school locker. Seated on the ground, sketch book in hand. You weren't giving much thought to what you were drawing: just basic anatomy figure sketches. Nothing that was overly detailed or required a lot of thought. You loved art like that. The stuff you could just effortlessly create.

The Heathers walked by your locker, you did your best not to look up and give eye contact to either of them but of course you were noticed anyways. Just not by the Red Devil.

Heather McNamara noticed you. She took one glance at your art and was immediately sitting down next to you with a smile on her face.

"Oh my God! You're amazing at that! What're you drawing?" She asks, leaning over your shoulder. You flinch at her sudden appearance next to you and her energy, glancing at her and then at the others. Heather Duke had her arms folded across her chest, watching you and Heather McNamara with an intense glare while Heather Chandler took one glance at you. Seemed to stop for a moment before she kept walking. You second guessed and thought maybe you had imagined her stopping.

Your eyes shifted from them to Heather McNamara, feeling a little awkward with the blonde next to you," Oh... um... just-"

You're cut off by Heather Duke, though you're almost relieved by that." Heather, let's go!" She makes a 'get up' hand gesture.

"Okay, okay! Just a second!" Heather McNamara replies, looking to you again after looking over at Heather Duke. "Can you teach me how to draw like that sometime? My art score is low and I could use a tutor."

"Sure..?" You raise an eyebrow slightly. That was the last thing you expected to have happen.

"Great! Thanks! Oh! What's your name?" She asks you just as she was about to get up.

"Y/N." You respond, she smiles at you and gives you a quick (awkward) hug.

"Nice meeting you, Y/N! Library after school today?"

"Okay.."

"Great!" Heather gets up and leaves, Heather Duke scoffs and glares at you before they both scramble after Heather Chandler who was a good distance ahead.

That's how you and Heather McNamara became friends. Something you never thought would happen. From what you've gathered, she's much nicer than the other Heathers.

~~~

It's been three weeks now of you tutoring Heather in art, you thought she was getting better at it. On top of it, you both were close friends now. She was just so easy to talk to and genuinely pretty funny once you got to know her.

It was after school, you and Heather M were in the school library. Working on an art project the two of you had been paired together for. You guys didn't have the same art class, but the art teacher was trying this thing where she paired students from different class periods on projects. You weren't sure why, you thought maybe it was her way of getting students to connect with people they normally wouldn't.

"Y/N, I was wondering. Are you busy this Friday night?" She asked you, you looked up from the references you'd been flipping through in a book and shook your head.

"No, why?"

Her smile widened and you immediately regretted not coming up with a lie. You knew that look.

"Kurt and Ram are hosting a house party. I'll have Heather come to yours when she picks the rest of us up!"

Great. Now you're going to a house party. You'd done so well at avoiding those.

"Alright.. but could you come to mine after school first? I have no idea what to wear to a house party." You admit.

"Oh my Gosh! Totally! Ee, this is going to be awesome!" She squeals, throwing her hands into the air. Her excited look made it worth it.

~~~

Friday night rolls around, Heather M had helped you get into a nice outfit (whatever you want to imagine) and Heather Chandler had gotten all five of you to the party. The five being you, Veronica, the Heathers.

You weren't sure what to expect. Sure you could guess but all those guesses made you nervous. Luckily, you had Heather M and Veronica keeping an eye on you. In the time you had known Heather M Veronica had become friends with you too.

It was well into the party now, you had a few drinks. Nothing too insane, but you were definitely a little tipsy. Not as bad as the other Heathers and Veronica, who you were surprised to see as drunk as she was.

You were leaned up against the counter top in the kitchen, watching as Heather M poured each of you another drink. Heather Chandler walked over to you with a smirk.

"Hey, nerd. Come over here for a second." She demanded, you glanced at her in confusion but listened.

Without warning, she kissed you. Heather D & M and Veronica stared at the both of you with wide eyes and confusion. Veronica cheered though.

"Yeah! Get it, Y/N!" She's drunk, leave her be.

You blushed heavily and pulled away after a moment, staring into Heather's eyes. You couldn't read her. You didn't want to admit it, but you had been crushing on her as you got closer with the group. Did she pick up on that? What did this mean?

"Come on." Heather C muttered, grabbing you by your hand; dragging you somewhere upstairs and into one of the bedrooms.

You weren't sure whose but you didn't care enough to figure it out. You just simply followed Heather.

When she got you into the room, she had pushed you against the closed door with a bit of force. Kissing at your neck which got a gasp out of you, you moved her off you so you could gather your thoughts.

"What the hell?" You asked, breathless. She smirked again at that and her hand trailed down your side.

"This is what you've wanted, isn't it?" Fuck.

She knew.

You gulped and didn't answer, which confirmed everything for her," Just relax and let it happen. You're hot, let me fucking kiss you." Heather whispered against your lips.

Part of you knew this was wrong. You were both drunk. Her more than you. You were sure both of you would regret this in the morning. But right now? You didn't care about any of that.

Little did you know neither of you would regret it and that it would turn into something more.

#x reader #fem reader #canon x reader #fanfic #wlw fiction #heathers #heathers x reader #heather chandler #heather chandler x reader #heather chandler x fem!reader

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biapascal · 2 months ago

Text

Childood Besties.

Request: hi! how are you? if you're taking requests i would love one with paul mescal <3 him and reader were childhood friends and always had feelings, but they stop seeing each other because life, collegue happens (the usual) and when the both are adults the meet again during the holidays and it's so cute, pleasee!!! thanks, have a lovely day <3

Hi love! 🤎🫧 Hope you like this!

Summary: reader name is Millie. Childood best friends. Fluff fluff fluff 🪶

Warnings: loss of a parent.

You met him at the playground. Your hands were covered in dirt and he was playing with toy cars next to you. You didn't even bother to ask him to join you: you were building your fort and didn't want any unwanted visitors.

"It's going to fall" he said. "What?" You tilted your head and he pointed to your construction. "It's going to fall." You found it annoying. "No, it's not" you replied. He smiled softly. "All right then, can my cars come by, they need gas."

"Yes, I have gasoline in there."

🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧

You didn't want to get this tattoo. You hated the idea of the ink taking root in your skin, you would have felt damaged. You spent the night before scrolling through Pinterest looking for inspiration. You chose the seahorse because it reminded you of the days you spent with him at the beach. You didn't even like it that much, but you were tired of searching. Your father died and you felt the need to get a tattoo. You thought it was stupid, but you felt it was the right thing to do. They had just opened a tattoo parlor in your own city. A friend recommended it, and you didn't have the time or inclination to look elsewhere. Gia got a tattoo there: A small gerbil on the collar bone. It was cute, and that was enough for you to understand the skills of the tattoo artist. You arrived with the picture ready to be shown, and seeing Paul was unexpected. The two of you were childhood buddies until eighth grade: he started playing soccer and you didn't care about his hobbies anymore, so you found other friends. You didn't leave him with hatred, but over the years you wondered what your teenage years would have been like around him. You even had an innocent crush on him during seventh grade, but you never told him because you felt he already knew and didn't say anything so as not to break your heart. After high school he disappeared from your sight. You followed him on social media and saw that he got a girlfriend. She was hot and he seemed happy. You weren't jealous, but you couldn't help but wonder what he would be like as a boyfriend.

When you saw him that day, he was single and in great shape. "Mills!" He greeted you. "Damn, I didn't expect to see you” you chuckled. "Yeah, me neither." He was cleaning a table and seemed relaxed and happy to see you. You'd be lying if you said he wasn't a fine man. "How are you??"

Shitty: Your father just died and you got a college degree in marine biology while working at Starbucks. You managed to smile despite the horrible feeling inside you. "Well" you didn't even want to lie. "My father just died..." his eyes widened in shock. "Jez Mills, I'm so sorry” you nodded, used to those words. "I was actually going to get a tattoo for him, it's stupid and clichéd I know..."

“Well, I don't judge. If you feel it's something you want to do to remember him, that's fine.” He said. He was always good at drawing and for years he had to choose between following his soccer career or an artistic path.

The seahorse was perfect.

You smiled. "Thanks, it's really cute" he got up from his seat. "I know I shouldn't ask, but why a seahorse? Did your dad introduce you to marine biology?" you shook your head. "I actually picked a seahorse yesterday” you admitted, blushing a little. He smiled amused. "Really?" you nodded. "I was thinking about my memories with him, and I remembered him teaching me how to swim, and then, you know... I just picked a sea creature". You were about to put on your jacket and leave when he stopped you. From the look on his face, you could tell he wasn't sure what he was going to say, and you felt strange. "Look, I know it's been a while..." he began. "More than a while, we were kids then" you added. "Yeah, but I just got here, my old buddies don't live here anymore, the town has changed. Wouldn't you like to have lunch together, talk a little and get to know our grown-up versions of ourselves together?" It was an interesting way to ask someone out. "Yes" you nodded with a warm feeling in your chest. "Sure. Monday is okay?"

You didn't know if this was a date, but you still had to look nice. During the holidays, the city embraced your Christmas spirit with comfort and cute decorations on the streets. You waited for him outside the pub, and when you saw him, you couldn't help but feel attracted and wished this was a date.

Christmas music was playing in the background, but the atmosphere was gone. Paul must have noticed your discomfort and asked you if you were okay. "Yeah, yeah, it's just” you looked around. "It's loud" he nodded. "We can go somewhere else if you want” you shook your head. "No, I really want a beer” he chuckled. "Okay, okay."

He has always been caring since he was a child. He seemed genuinely interested in how you felt. So when he started asking you about your family, work, and friends, you knew he wanted to know that everything was really okay.

"Yes, Mom got better and now I can say that the awful feeling of grief is slowly becoming less painful, but please, I want to know about your life” he felt uncomfortable and you wrinkled your eyebrows. "Sorry," he blushed. "It's just... I dropped out of college. Soccer was stressing me out and I was looking for a job" there was nothing to be ashamed of. "Hey, you have your own tattoo studio" he took a sip of his beer. "Why are you ashamed?" he sighed. "Well, all my friends went to college, even you..." you rolled your eyes. "Who cares, I have a degree and I work at Starbucks.” You raised your eyebrows. "Nothing against Starbucks, but after all those years of studying, it's not exactly what I wanted."

The lunch was great. It gave you a warm feeling. You felt comfortable around him and now you really wanted to get that tattoo.

When you arrived at the studio, he asked you where you wanted it. You blushed because you weren't sure. "Uh, how about the wrist?" he suggested. You nodded. "Is that a nice spot?" you asked. "Yes, it would look cute on you."

It was painful as hell, and when you got to the end and had the seahorse on your skin, you sighed in relief. He was there the whole time, working carefully and asking you about your pain. You wanted to stay in that chair with him for a little while longer, even if you didn't want to have another pain session. he noticed, and you both blushed. "How was it?" He asked. "Terrible, but the drawing is adorable," he smiled softly. "Glad you liked it."

You started to date shortly after. The first time he asked you out, he went to Starbucks and you felt embarrassed, but were happy to serve him and say yes. You have met several times. One day you were walking through the park and noticed that the playground had disappeared. "That's sad” he looked at you confused. You pointed to the place where you and him used to spent your childhood together. "The playground...they got rid of it" he looked surprised. "Oh" he started to walk and you followed him. You both tried to remember where the objects of your past were, pretending to see them. You were on the "swing" when he suddenly stopped and stared at you seriously. "Hey, what's going on?" He remained serious for a few seconds and then smiled, giving you a warm feeling in your stomach. "Nothing, just thinking” you scowled. "About what?" He chuckled. "Nothing, it's just... this place reminded me of when you had a crush on me" he admitted. You blushed and looked down. "Oh, so you knew then..." he nodded. "I was waiting for you to tell me" you widened your eyes in surprise. "Too bad you didn't and I was too cowardly to say anything myself". "So you... you had a crush on me?" he chuckled, obviously embarrassed. "Yeah." You both remained silent. "But I don't want to be a coward now, too” your eyes brightened. "Do you have a crush on me?" You asked. He nodded. "Yes, Mills, I like you and I'd like to kiss you if I that’s okay”you took his hand, colder than yours, but when your lips melted together you realized that the warmth was the same.

#paul mescal #paul mescal x reader #paul mescal x y/n #paul mescal fanfic #fluff

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pinkthrone445 · 1 year ago

Text

-The most wonderful time of the year?-

Pairing:Melissa Schemmenti x Reader

Gender: hurt, hurt.

Warnings : (+18) strong words, fights.

Summary:Melissa makes the worst mistake of her life by letting you go when things don't go the way you wanted them to.

Hello! I hope you had a great Christmas! I'll continue with the requests but I wanted to write something painful too between all the horniness hahaha

*I didn't had much time to check for spelling errors, sorry.

Another year, another Christmas at the Schemmenti family's house, there were too many guests, and every room was filled with conversations and laughter, some room was heard with shouts of argument that quickly turned into laughter and hugs as everyone was too drunk to have a serious fight or remember why they were fighting.

You really enjoyed Christmas like that, full of people, food, happiness and the magic that children believed in about Santa. Living away from your family was difficult, but spending it with Mel's family helped alleviate some of the homesickness. Everyone treated you like one of the family, the kids loved you to come to the house, and they stole you most of the night to play with them. Melissa's mother loved you and always made you your favorite dessert. Everything was perfect, being among such a big and loving family, made you want your own family with your girlfriend.

Everyone stayed at Mel's mother's house to feast together in the evening and open presents the next morning all together around the big tree.

After dinner, one of Mel's nephews, Polo, asked you to sit on the couch so you could read him a story, which you happily did. The little boy was curled up on your chest as he sucked on his finger while you read the story they had chosen. Mel was watching you read to him and caress his little head while she drank wine with her sister at the table, when the little boy was almost asleep, she got up from the table and sat by your side hugging you with one arm on your shoulders, the little boy smiled at his aunt and closed his eyes again, falling fast asleep on you as small snores came out of his mouth. Carefully you kissed his forehead and snuggled him closer with the blanket and then looked at your girlfriend

-"Mel... I want one"-you whispered and she laughed looking at you

-"If you want, we can come and see him more often, he loves being with you"-She responded whispering so the little one sleeping in your arms didn't wake

-"I'd like to, but I was talking about a baby of ours... I know how much you love big families and so do I, I would love to have a baby together... Can you imagine him running and playing around the house, filling every corner with drawings and laughter"-You whispered and excitement began to be heard in your voice-"Taking him to school together, watching him grow, teaching him to live and love... Can you imagine all that? Our little family?..."-you smiled looking at her, but she didn't smiled

-"Honestly, no... I never thought about a family bigger than what it's with you and me..." -she answered truthfully

-"Never?"-You asked disappointedly-"I've thought about it many times, especially when I see you interacting with children... Or when you hug me and caress my stomach... Can't you imagine it growing, letting our love grow more making us bring it one more life as a result of that love we have for each other? It would be beautiful..."-You smiled again hoping to get her excited, but she just laughed

-"Our life is beautiful and perfect just the way it is, we don't need a child for that... What are you going to do when I'm older? Change the diapers of both of us? Please hon, don't talk nonsenses"-She joked trying to make you see how ridiculous the situation was, but that only made you feel sad

-"Yes, you're right, it's silly"-you replied and got up from the couch coming out of the red-haired woman's embrace-"I'll go take Polo to his room to sleep"- you whispered before leaving your girlfriend alone in the living room.

You and Mel had been together for almost 5 years, it wasn't the first time you mentioned to her about starting a family, before she said maybe later, but now was the first time she told you that the idea was silly and that hurt more than the other times she said she would think about it later.

When you left little Polo on his bed, he smiled and snuggled up with his teddy bear, for a few seconds you looked at his pajamas and how it matched yours since Mel's mother gave everyone pajamas to match... Polo was the son of one of Mel's cousins, one who was almost the same age as her and yet decided to adopt to have a child... You knew that Melissa would use the excuse she always used when she didn't want something, that she was too old for that, that changes were difficult for her, that at her age people would make fun of her and all that stuff she always said, she always had an excuse to say no to the things you wanted to do and she didn't. And it's not just talking about an important topic like having children, it was about everything, even going out dancing with you... But you did compromise what you liked to do things she wanted instead of looking for a stupid excuse every time you didn't like something she picked to do.

Sadness was turning into anger the more you thought things through. Passing through the bedroom door and seeing that Mel was settling in for sleep, you decided to turn around and go to the living room again, sitting quietly and thinking as you watched the campfire slowly burn away. You sighed and hugged your legs trying to get the sadness out somehow, while you loved being with Mel's family, you also missed yours, right now you needed to talk to your sisters or someone to see if wanting kids while she didn't want to was being selfish.

Without noticing, a few tears escaped your eyes as you stared at the campfire and every sock hung on the fireplace, the children had been put on smaller, very cute socks. Everyone was already asleep and lying down, the silence wasn't helping your mood much.

You were startled when you felt someone hugging you from behind the couch, when you felt your girlfriend's perfume you recognized her, but that didn't change how you felt

-"Are you okay?... Why don't you come to bed? Why are you crying?"-she asked softly so as not to scare you

-"I'm fine... I just... I guess I miss my family more than I thought..."-You whispered and tried to get away a little but she wouldn't let you

-"Oh baby... We can go with them the next holidays if you want to... Let's go to bed, it's cold and tomorrow we have to get up early to open the presents..."-She insisted and you sighed

-"I just want to stay here a little longer..."-You answered and she kissed your forehead

-"Please, you know how hard it is for me to sleep if you are not by my side... If you want tomorrow we'll call your family so you see them but let's sleep now..."-She insisted and you turned to look her in the eye

-"Mel... Why you don't want to have children?..."-You asked with real interest, maybe it wasn't just her age, maybe there was another reason and you just wanted to know

-"Please, again with this?... Does Christmas make you so nostalgic that you feel like that emptiness is only filled if you have a children?" - she asked in a harsher way than she wanted, her choice of words hadn't been the best-"Look hon... Before, when I was with my ex husband, I did want children, but not anymore, not after him and the divorce, not after so many years already passed. The more and more time passed, the less I wanted to have children, they just make things more complicated... It is not true that a child helps to improve a relationship, they only occupy your time and take you further away from your partner, I have seen it a thousand times in my family. I know it seems like a nice thought to enlarge the family, but it's not. It's not something I want in my life, and you have to respect that... I know I told you before that maybe in the future but the truth is that I was waiting for you to lose your hope... But now I'll be honest with you, I don't want children and I'm not going to want them at any point of my life"-The redhead spoke firmly, crossing her arms and making you feel small

-"And what about what I want?"-Your voice came out weaker than you wanted, but you felt weak and your voice showed it, so did your teary eyes-"Why what I want can never come true?... When I proposed to you, you said no... And now with the kids... Even when I asked if we could adopt a pet you said no using a stupid excuse. If I'd known before that you didn't want to do this..."-Your voice broke out because you got a lump in your throat and Melissa became more serious than she already was, seeing your weak form

-"If you had known before that I didn't want children what? What would have been different?"-She asked with annoyance in her voice and you sighed, why she was the one who was angry if you were the one who was being denied what you wanted?

-"Maybe if I'd known before that we didn't have the same goals, I wouldn't have let myself fallen for you this hard... Maybe I wouldn't be so in love with you, Maybe I would have looked for someone who would be happy to commit to me and start a family with me or marry me... -You whispered, avoiding her gaze. She stared at you, surprised by your confession. Standing there with her felt painful at the time, so you walked past her and upstairs crying leaving her there.

When you got to the room you saw the redhead's things on the bedside table next to her side and sighed, you decided to leave the bed for her to sleep well and you took your pillow and blanket and went to sleep in the children's room on the carpet.

That night you barely slept and very early in the morning the children woke you up to open the presents. Practically pushing you to go down with them.

When you got downstairs Mel was already there with two cups of coffee, hers loaded black and yours with marshmallows, but you didn't drink it, not because you were angry, but because you didn't have an appetite. The children made you sit between them and Mel sat at the other end, which did not go unnoticed by her mother who was used to Melissa being on top of you hugging you. As the children and everyone opened their presents, you forced a smile when you opened your presents or the children showed you theirs. At all times you avoided your girlfriend's eyes, even when she opened the gift you had given her, even when you had to explain to her that if she shined the flashlight on her cell phone through the necklace it would project a picture of you two surrounded by I love you in different languages. Now it hurt to say I love you, not because you didn't feel it, but because after last night's conversation, something felt different even though you couldn't know what it was.

Later in the day, everyone went out to play in the snow and you went out specially to take care of the kids that were enjoying their new presents, you were surprised to see when your girlfriend approached you and asked to speak privately.

Before you could say anything, she started to speak

-"I was thinking all night... I don't think it's fair for me to keep you from the things you want to do... I think I'm being very selfish, that's why I'm letting you go, so you can find someone who wants to do the same things as you"-She spoke hurriedly, afraid that her voice would betray her

-"What? What are you saying Melissa?... Are you breaking up with me?"-You asked in disbelief

-"Yes, so you can find someone who wants to have kids, pets, to marry and all that stuff that you want and I don't..."-She replied earnestly, and you laughed without happiness, your eyes were watery

-"Really? Would you rather break up with me than commit to finding a solution that works for both of us? To compromise something so we could both be happy? You're unbelievable Melissa"-You responded angrily before walking past her crashing her shoulder on purpose before entering the house to get your stuff.

Mel thought she was doing the right thing, that this was what you wanted, letting you go so you could go looking for someone else to accomplish the things you wanted. What Melissa didn't understand was that you wanted those things but with her, not with someone else.

Crying, you packed your suitcase and left the house, taking advantage of the fact that everyone was playing outside so as not to make a big fuss and have to explain to everyone that Melissa had just broken up with you, none other than at Christmas when you were away from your family and didn't know who else to turn to .

That was the last time the redhead heard from you, when she got home your things were gone, all traces that you lived there were gone, you had only left the void behind you and the photos of the two of you hanging on the wall, the only proof that had been left that you had been there.

Melissa's mother had given her a big reprimand when she found out what had happened and how stupid her daughter had been to let you go, but by the time she tried to call you, you had already changed your number. She also tried to contact your family to find out where you were, the only thing they told her was that you had moved in again with them and that you didn't want to hear from her anymore.

Melissa spent months, years regretting everything she had done, she lost everything because she didn't want to give up a little for you.

5 Christmases Later

The last day of school before Christmas brake, Melissa walked into Barbara's classroom to see if her fried was ready to go.

-"Barbara, do you want me to warm up the car?"-The redhead asked and her friend looked at her with a little boy about three years old sitting on her lap

-"I have to wait a few minutes, his mother called me and said she was running late because her work shift at the hospital was a little longer, we are waiting for her to arrive..."-The brunette explained, holding the little boy sitting on her lap, who was painting with crayons on the teacher's desk. The redhead smiled tenderly seeing the concentration of the little boy, there was something about him that generated a lot of affection for him-"It will only be a few minutes, she it's coming"-Barbara begged to wait for her with a smile

-"Mama it's coming"-The little babble while still painting, the redhead smiled as she heard his sweet voice

-"Mama it's here!"-You said agitated seeing Barbara with your child-"I'm so sorry miss Barbara, I tried to get out earlier but when it's Christmas a lot of fireworks accidents happen and they held me longer... Thank you for taking care of him"-you said sincerely, approaching the desk and smiling as you saw how your little one ran into your arms

-"Mama! I missed you!"-Your little one screamed running with his short legs and hugging you tightly.

-"Please sweetie, it's not a bother, he's very well behaved"-Barbara responded, and you breathed a sigh of relief.

On the other hand, Melissa, who was behind the door you had entered through and therefore you had not noticed her presence, could not believe that you were there. Your face had changed a little, you looked older, more experienced, but your smile was the same, it just got brighter when you hugged your little one.

Your son took off the hospital cap you were still wearing, forgetting to take it off in the hurry with which you had left, and put it on his little head making you laugh.

-"Thank you once again Barbara, it's been hard to adapt again since I came back... Thank you for your patience... Merry Christmas, say Merry Christmas to your teacher baby" - You told your son and he smiled at Barbara with his eyes half covered by the bonnet

-"Medy Chistmas Baba(Barbara), the dawing I was making it's fo youuuu, byee" - Your little one spoke excitedly to be with you and you smiled as you turned around to leave, but your blood ran cold at the sight of your ex-girlfriend in front of you. You sighed and walked past her whispering a Merry Christmas to her too before exiting the classroom. The redhead was just lost and confused to see you again that she couldn't say anything to answer or move to go after you.

#melissa schemmenti x you #melissa schemmenti fanfic #melissa schemmenti x reader #melissa schemmenti #Melissa schemmenti hurt #melissa schemmenti abott elementary #abott elementary fanfic #abott elementary

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cursedkeyboard · 1 year ago

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Babies shouldn't grow up ☆ Jason Todd & GN!Reader (PT.3)

What does Jason do after feeding and giving a home to the brat he stole from the slums of Gotham? Raise the kid lovingly like he wished he'd been raised, of course. [PART ONE ♤ PART TWO ♤ PART THREE ♤ PART FOUR ♤ PART FIVE ♤ PART SIX]

Pairings: Platonic Jason Todd & Child GN!Reader

In the beginning, living together wasn't very smooth

Despite your shared pasts, the immediate fondness from Jason, your eagerness for affection and love, you two were still very much strangers

You were hesitant and skittish, often sticking to the guest room Jason said it was yours, since for your entire life you mostly lived by yourself

Jason didn't actually know how to deal with a vulnerable and traumatized child, he wasn't Dick, he didn't have an innate charm that allowed you to be drawn to him easily

But that didn't stop him from trying

Every day, Jason made sure to get you out of your room to eat

Breakfast, lunch, and dinner

Eating was non-negotiable, even if you were used to only a bite or two a day, he wanted you to eat what you could

You felt sick for the first few days, your body unused to so much water and nutrients, causing it to think something was wrong

Jason almost went insane with worry, rubbing your back, carrying you around, and even refusing to go out when you told him you were fine

From your vomiting, you were anything but

Despite his fear and anxiety, Jason sat down to google all your symptoms and treatments when you finally fell asleep after throwing up again

Pushing the multiple deadly diseases and cancers aside, he learned that your body was just a little overwhelmed and all you two had to do was increase your meals little by little instead of shoving food down your throat

Though he still insisted on you drinking at least five cups of water every day

Then, maybe a week or two later once you two were a little more comfortable around each other

You not feeling like a bother anymore and Jason not eating himself with anxiety

The two of you started spend more time together

Jason cut some of his vigilante work, told Bruce to fuck off when he was questioned, and made sure to take you out to buy a year's worth of clothing using the old man's credit card

You started clinging a bit to him, asking him to teach you how to read and write, seeking validation when you managed to understand a whole page without needing help, asking about his life and past

And Jason always made sure to be honest with you, about the good and the bad because he wanted you to trust him

From experience, he knew that keeping things from you would only cause problems down the line

He'd tell you about his days in the slums while preparing a meal, you at his hip helping him put things in the pot

He'd talk about being a Robin with both fondness and bitterness while he helped with your hair, having done so much research to make sure he treated your type of hair correctly

He'd confess about what happened with the Joker, keeping it slightly less gory than it was

About his mother and Batman

About his death, hell, the pit, the after

He'd tell you everything as the days went on

And you'd sit by his side, cuddling with him, hugging him close when his voice trembled

Jason's hold would often tighten around you when he talked about something that made him sick to his stomach

Especially when it was a story about almost losing someone

Like he thought you'd disappear even in his arms

Like that, the trust between the two of you only grew as weeks turned into months and soon enough those months turned into a year

Jason had returned to his normal patrol hours once you were finally caught up with your studies and managed to put you in middle school

You were so damn excited and Jason knew exactly why

For a kid who was deprived of seemingly boring things since forever, school is a place filled with knowledge and wonder

The very first thing you did when you got home was show him a drawing of your hero the art teacher asked your class to make

Jason cried when he saw a poorly sketched version of Red Hood

He put it up in the fridge after printing it twice

You two definitely started matching, by the way

Jackets, shirts, shorts, hats, even phone cases

Jason never thought he'd be so lame as to buy stuff like that but once the two of you wore the exact same ugly christmas sweater, it was over for him

It was a little embarrassing, especially for you

But when you two went out with the same jackets and an elderly couple complimented the father and kiddo duo, you couldn't help but love it too

It was jarring for Jason, for sure

He didn't really consider himself your father, maybe your guardian or your older brother, but... it wasn't too bad

No, in fact, he kind of liked it

You are his kid

God, the restaurant dates

He'd take you to every food place in Gotham

From the ones that made you two throw up for the entire weekend

To the ones that made Bruce call him after spending eight hundred dollars on golden lobsters

It would be no surprise if you ended up liking burgers the most though

Like kid, like father

If you had any problem in school, Jason wouldn't try to hide away

He got himself a fake identity for the sole purpose of making himself your guardian through more than illegal terms

Doesn't even matter if he was in the middle of a meeting with other rogues, heroes or even his family

Jason would drop everything for you

Especially when you punched the fuck out of little Timmy for saying something bigoted

The dean and the teacher would probably try to make him scold you, telling the two of to you that this violent behavior is unacceptable and should not be rewarded

And Jason would look at them, at little Timmy's infuriated mother, and tell them that if Timmy didn't want to get his shit rocked, he should've kept his mouth shut

Of course, he also threatened them saying he'd let all of Gotham know that they protected and encouraged bigoted behavior from ten year olds

Needless to say, little Timmy didn't bother you after that day

And you also got ice cream after getting a two day suspension

"Did he make a noise?"

"Squealed like a fucking pig."

"That's my fucking kid."

Jason wouldn't let you act spoiled

Sure, he'd spoil you rotten, give you everything he wanted as a kid and what you want

But he knows the important of humility

That doesn't mean he'll let anyone ever try to bully you, though

To be continued...

#jason todd #red hood #red hood x you #jason todd x gn!reader #platonic jason todd x reader #jason todd x gender neutral reader #platonic red hood x reader #red hood x gender neutral reader #platonic #jason todd x y/n

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serpentface · 4 months ago

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Faiza: how did you come to believe your philosophy on your religion?

"I was introduced to the concept by my tutor. Shiyabi Erunara? You may have heard of him? He was one of the founders of the royal Couyinnacame* in Godsmouth. Disgraced himself in a scandal with one of his co-founders' wives, haha, sooo... Wound up on the opposite side of the empire, tutoring us little Haidamane brats and being exceptionally overqualified for it. And he absolutely knew it.

So he would expect a lot from us, you know? When he tested you, you wouldn't just let you give answers by rote, you had to explain in detail how you got to your answer. You can't just say 'because I know', he wanted to know exactly how you knew. He wanted you to justify it. Even if you had the right answer- any flaws in your reasoning? Nope. Mister Erunara wouldn't have it. You had to go over it again and again until you could explain it inside and out. It made lessons very, very long. I always thought he was just milking the hours for pay, haha. Probably was, but-. His convictions were sincere enough. I think.

So of course, when he'd teach religious studies, he'd make you work through that too. You couldn't just explain a rite to him, you'd have to explain the theory of the rite, the underlying logic of what makes every little minuscule step work. I mean, from personal experience, the average PRIEST doesn't even really think about that- like, we know, but we don't really have to know. We just do.

And there was this one time he was working through a lesson with me. We were discussing the rites of expelling dagi from the body of a child with the red fever. And I had it all down, I could explain every little detail, all the theoretical angles, everything. And I finish and he says, "Correct. And then it doesn't work. The child dies. Why?"

And I was at a loss. Because that happens of course, yeah? Sometimes you do everything PERFECTLY, immaculate, and it just- doesn't work. So I work through every step again in my head, and I'm drawing a blank. I don't have an answer besides, 'well, sometimes people just die'? And he's not going to take that. And I'm frustrated, and just want to get this over with so I can go play with the dogs, so I finally just throw my hands up and say "I don't know!". And he just- just kind of laughs and pats me on the shoulder. And then moves right on to the home economics lesson.

So, you know. I was a kid, I just thought this guy was an annoying, pedantic hardass, and that was about it. I was inducted not long after that, so the rest of my schooling was at the temple. I didn't see him again for a long time. But that stuck with me, you know? Why DOES it go wrong when you do every single thing right? And you can just say, "hey, this discussion is in a theoretical space, in real life conditions are imperfect. Your actions were right, but something was just a little off, and so the child dies". But it just nagged at me, it felt deeper than that. It was more like something was missing. Something about the theory itself was wrong.

I got in contact with him again after I was fully initiated. I wanted to keep pursuing my studies, get a little fresh air from the temple atmosphere, he seemed like a good option. So we started writing letters back and forth, just here and there. He'd send me old books now and then. Trade me for stuff I stole out of the temple library- Uh. Don't tell anyone. It'll be bad for you. Haha. And one year, he came back into town for the dry season festival, so. We met up.

And we were just chatting, you know? Nothing serious, just what our lives are like now, what we've been up to since he was my tutor. And I offhandedly mention the red fever lesson to him, how much it stuck with me. And I had always assumed he'd been messing with me back then, you know? I was champing at the bit to be done, so he made his lesson as meandering and frustrating as he possibly could. So I'm trying to laugh with him about it, how he was so successful at tormenting girlchild me that I still think about it- what IS missing? Haha. But he just looks me in the eye and says "You're trying to treat body with spirit. Body can only interact with body."

So we started talking about it very seriously. That's where I was introduced to the concept. And I mean, it's not that I'd never heard of the idea. I was mostly interested in political philosophy, but I'd heard of it in the abstract. Arguments that the cycling of God's spirit is false, coming from pseudo intellectuals with their heads so far up their own asses that they can't recognize the sun. But when we talked about it, it was just like, Oh. This isn't just - edgy philosophical masturbation, this is a theory. This could be what's missing.

I didn't come around to the notion immediately, of course. We said our goodbyes and I went right back to being a priestess. But that kind of only made me more convinced, you know? Doing the same sets of rites, over and over and over again. Sometimes they seem to work, yeah, and most of the time I have no way of knowing. But then sometimes-. I give Odomache's blessing to a pregnant woman, yeah, the strength to fight through her woman's war, and I do so impeccably. The sacrifice takes, the signs are good. Every little detail is right. My actions are unimpeachable. And then a month later I find out she and her child both died in labor. I bless a man and his sword, and that very night a robber takes it off him and sticks it in his gut. He drags half of his innards out before he manages to die. And I could just say, "Well, that's not really supposed to happen when you bless someone. Something must have gone wrong. I don't know!" and move on. But it kept nagging at me. It wasn't that something went wrong, it was more like the rites themselves were wrong, they were incapable of the material effect they intend.

So I thought about it a lot over the years. Did a lot of reading. Wrote to Erunara now and then, until he died. And it's just- with everything I've seen, everything I know, this is the only model that makes sense. Only body can interact with body. The nature of cause and effect is physical. Dagi must enter the body for disease to take hold. Rain must soak the ground for plants to grow. The realm of spirit- thought, willpower, belief- it has nothing to do with it. I can't make a barren field sprout by pretending to be the rain. And isn't that all that most rites are, when it comes down to it? Demanding for spirit to interact with body, and then throwing our hands up and saying "I don't know!" when it doesn't work?"

---

*Couyinnacame is the word for Wardi institutions of philosophy and academia, existing as physical meeting places. The Couy- root is the same as the name Couya and comes from an antiquated word for mind/spirit. -Yinnacame is an adoption of the Burri word for schools (Yiñacami), carried by a lot of Imperial Bur era institutions and their descendants

---

A little more elaboration- Burri-Wardi (proto)materialism generally acknowledges that both Body (matter) and Spirit (the soul, thought, willpower) Exist, but denies the notion that Spirit has any capacity to influence Body. This extends to God- God's physical corpse exists and can be interacted with in the form of the world, but Its spirit (the aspect that the Wardi Faith is BASED upon interacting with) is severed from the body in death and is thus noninteractive. (Some schools closer to actual materialism deny the existence of the soul/spirit itself, but these are Very niche (like on the level of a few singular philosophers on the very peripheries of the scene)).

This school includes like a proto-proto theory of the atom, positing that there is are fundamental, invisible states of Body that give different types of matter their properties- this is explanatory for plainly material effects that have no obvious material source (wind is an example), or questions as to how, if the Spirit is noninteractive, the Body of a living being is animated.

Common Wardi belief includes evil spirits called dagi that are the cause of disease, which are tiny and both spiritually and physically enter the body. This meshes very well with the materialist outlook, which would describe dagi as the Body of disease. Some variants posit that the fundamental Body that animates living beings can exist and act on other matter aside from living beings. This is also what allows for someone fully following this philosophy to believe in interactive evil spirits and even ghosts- just that these are ultimately composed of material Body rather than immaterial Spirit.

#Faiza would not be this open about it with pretty much anyone but this is in-character for the theoretical circumstances she would be #faiza haidamane #ask meme

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alekthefox · 8 months ago

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Headcanons about professor Aventurine and Professor Ratio AU!

Veritas mainly teaches one subject (i cannot decide which one) but substitutes for any of the other seven subjects he has PhDs in. He's in charge of the chess club.

Aventurine is happily in charge of the theatre club and teaches social studies. By Ratio's continued insistence he also became a licensed psychologist though he doesn't work in the field currently.

Reputation. Among colleagues Ratio is well respected and as for Aventurine... Sometimes people wonder how he got so far from his demeanor and leniency with students yet his results make people shut their mouths. Once, there was an important figure coming to the college by surprise and one of the higher-ups was sent to notify everyone currently working in order to make the college look good. Shock when Aventurine was on his phone, not lecturing, while the class did anything but study. Literally doing hair and nails, playing cards(and gambling secretly which Ave turned a blind eye to), drawing, chatting loudly, etc. After that Ave's students' results of the past year were checked over again more closely because it was unbelievable how relaxed and chaotic class time was with such good results. They were dumbfounded when it was all legit. Not ONE of the students used AI, or cheated in any way. NOT. ONE. That is how much they respect Aventurine and his subject. He made sure to spoil them more after that.

Aventurine is loved by all students. Extremely rare exceptions. Ratio though... Freshmen absolutely hate him to the bone marrow. He's extremely strict and not lenient at all with test scores. But with time things become clearer, usually taking a year or two to see he does actually care. One instance being how when a chronically ill student was on the verge of failing he compiled the entire year's lectures into a more succinct paper and sent it to them. (The student passed.) Another being how when one of his students was barely scraping by and finally got a score they were happy with Ratio praised them the same way he does to all other students who get a good score. And he never compares them or praises the one who used to struggle any more than the rest. Another being how he would buy textbooks for his students who couldn't afford them or get them through the school. (He did get into trouble for that but kept doing it. They couldn't do much to stop him.) But each year he would face the same pain.

Aventurine noticed each time. He sent his students to spread word and positive rumours about Dr. Ratio to anyone who would listen. Soon enough each year as soon as the first day—it had become a tradition—older students would warn freshmen of Ratio's demeanor being demanding and cold but assured them he had a gold heart and told of his many shiny moments.

Veritas was deeply confused by this. He didn't know how or why it was happening. There was also no good way to investigate, besides it did soothe his pain. One day Ratio wanted to speak with Ave about one thing or another but when he entered he was surprised to hear him telling his students to do exactly that. To praise him to anyone who would be willing to hear it. In exchange this damned man offered that the students vote on what play they want to perform and he'll convince the principal to let it happen.

Veritas leaned on the doorframe with crossed arms and fondness in his eyes. Aventurine noticed everyone was looking behind him and looked startled that he'd been caught, as if Veritas would be mad about it. This was the very first time Ratio had kissed him in public, and in front of students at that.

They would always spend lunch together. You cannot convince me otherwise. These two are glued to each other(sometimes begrudgingly).

Whenever students would ask Aventurine about family life(they still don't dare ask Ratio) he would openly derail everything on schedule for the class and gush about Veritas. He was careful not to reveal his identity though. Most students don't believe the 'rumours' of their kiss. It seems completely beyond reason and belief to them which Ave finds absolutely hilarious. One day a student asks what his boyfriend does for a job. Aventurine smiles and says: "Why do you ask when you already know?" It confused everyone in the room so he continued. "He is in the same line of work as me, and same college." Ave was so incredibly smug about it as they tried to figure out who it was. It took about four minutes of distressed chatter(Aventurine watched in delight) until someone mentioned the 'they got caught kissing' rumour. (Of course time will twist the tale.) When Aventurine smiled wider at that mention... you can imagine the reaction.

Aventurine actively advocates against the dress code(within reason). A dress code is a good idea until it turns into sexism. If he sees a shoulder... No, he didn't.

#I LOVE THEM SO MUCH #honkai star rail #hsr aventurine #dr ratio #hsr veritas #hsr au #college au #Hsr college au #aventio #ratiorine #golden ratio #Professor Aventurine #Professor Ratio

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bqstqnbruin · 6 months ago

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Mat Barzal Teacher AU

@nicohischier listen I will crtl f if I want to but I didn't do it for this one

But this is the 9th one I've written and posted since Monday so that's gotta be something, right?

Teacher AU Series

Warnings: swearing

WC: 813

______________________________

“What are you doing?” Thea asks, walking into Orla’s room.

“Looking at my glassware.”

“Is it nice to look at?”

Orla sighs, closing her cabinets. “I have to replace like half of what I bought brand new last year because the students broke everything.”

“Oh, shit.”

“Yeah, oh, shit.”

Orla gets her computer out of her bag, where it had been sitting since she arrived in her classroom for the first time since the last school year ended, pulling up the Flinn website and praying that they had some sort of sale going on. Not that it was likely for the stuff she needed, but she could still have hope. “How much will it cost you?”

“The smallest beakers I need are five dollars, the largest are twenty three.”

“Each?”

“Each,” she groans, drawing the end of the word out.

“Oh, shit.”

Orla laughs. “I think we found our new catchphrase for the year.”

“A downgrade from last years, ‘oh, fuck,’ if I do say so,” Thea laughs.

Orla stares at the screen, adding everything she needed to buy new into the cart and watching the total cost increase by the second. “Why don’t we work at a school that pays for everything?”

“Because I don’t think those schools exist.” The two of them sit there for a second, Orla staring at her computer trying to figure out how she was going to pay for everything she needed for the school year. “Oh, do you know who your new humanities partner is?”

Orla shrugs. “Whoever that new French teacher is, I haven’t met him yet.”

Thea sighs. “I got paired with Richard,” she grimaces. “Why do we have to do this again?”

Orla sits up straight, folding her hands in front of her on her desk and tilting her head back so her nose was pointed into the air. Thea burst out laughing, knowing that she was imitating the vice principal they both hated. “To ensure that we are providing the most extensive cross-curricular education to our students.”

“More like to ensure that we have more busy work we don’t want to do. I mean, what cross-curriculum stuff can we do between biology and English?”

Thea looks at her friend as she puts her feet up on the top of the desk she had commandeered. “You teach AP Bio.”

“And?”

“Don’t they have to read and comprehend long passages just to write essays about them?”

“And?”

“Babe, that’s English. Richard is the perfect person to pair you with.”

“He’s a dick.”

“In more ways than one.”

Thea laughs, getting up to head back to her classroom to do some work before they had to head to the auditorium for their first week back meetings. She turns back to Orla “Don’t you know French?”

“Not really, no.”

Thea, with her hand on the door, stares out the window in the center. “One of your ex’s did, though, right?”

“Two; blue eyes and nostril boy.”

Thea nods, a smirk on her face that told Orla she wasn’t going to like whatever her friend was about to do next.

Orla sat back in her chair as Thea finally left, the door closing behind her. Why would she mention Orla’s exes? It wasn’t like either of them would be a teacher. Blue eyes moved away a while ago, Orla losing track of him after he ended up somewhere in Canada. Nostrils, however, was still somewhere on the island, which she knew because she ran into him way too often for her liking. They broke up because Orla thought he was way too self-involved; stopping just short of an actual temper tantrum when he didn’t get his way.

Granted, they were younger and much more immature when they dated, but it was still enough that Orla knew she didn’t want that.

She shrugs it off, going back to the Flinn website to see if she could pull any of their free resources that could be useful in order to make her feel better about the nearly one thousand dollar glassware purchase she was about to make.

She’s interrupted by a knock at her door while she’s reading about a nuclear decay inquiry lab, not looking up to see who walks in when she calls for them to enter.

“Orla?” she hears a familiar voice, her head snapping from her computer to see the one person she didn’t want in her classroom.

“Mat?”

“What are you doing here?”

“I teach here,” she says, hoping he can’t hear the shaking in her voice. Having a short conversation with him when they randomly happened to see each other was fine, but this? “What are you doing here?”

“I work here.”

The realization of what Thea’s facial expression meant finally dawned on her. You could see who was coming into the building from the hallway outside Orla’s classroom thanks to the weird design of the building. Thea had to have seen Mat coming in. “You’re the new French teacher.”

“You’re my curriculum partner.”

“Oh, shit.”

#mat barzal #mat barzal fic #mat barzal au #nhl #nhl fic #nhl au #hockey #hockey fic #hockey au #new york islanders au #new york islanders fic #islanders #islanders au #islanders fic #teacher au

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spottheantisemitism · 5 months ago

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"what if the X-men were black?" is a racist, antisemitic and anti-intersectional screed that 2013 tumblr fell in love with

Published in 2013 this made rounds of OG tumblr and made Bobby of Pencilscratchins draw all her Jewish X-men characters as brown.

Erik because he has Romani heritage (which is realistic and based and accurate to some comics).

Anon go kick rocks with your colorism! YOU read holocaust testimonies!

Also fun fact Nazi Germany did not understand black and brown the way Americans do so it was based on ethnicity and not color, a brown Jew and a pale white passing Jew were seen as one and the same to the Nazis

Guess which article she linked

It's this one!

But said Kitty was Latine because "the quintessential X-girl of the 70s shouldn't be white"

Kitty already is a queer woman of color because she's Jewish. Jews are POC. Bobby what the hell? Are you implying she's only coded non-white because she's Jewish or Mutant? what the hell?!

(BTW Bobby left Tumblr around Covid but if you send her hate asks because of this essay you'll end up on spot-the-antisemitism blocklist for harrasment)

Where did she get this "Jews are white and should be race lifted?" stuff? Why from Orion!

Top paragraph is fine!

antisemitism is written the gentile way that supports a racist eugenicist, off to a bad start.

Sexism is not covered? OH explain Storm's arcs of misogynoir or Jean's and Maddy's arc of going insane because she has the power of a god but is forced to be housewife and marry her sweetheart and have kids

Ableism is not explored? I'm sorry what about XAVIER'S ENTIRE ARC OF ABLIEST SELF HATRED AND OVERCOMING IT IN THE PREQUELS? The first class all being rich talented codedly disabled kids going to a prep school for the gifted. Disabled people really liking non human passing characters like Nightcrawler (and hating Xavier since he's too assimilationist to many). I'm sorry why do people fall for such blatant lies? the mentor of the X-men is literally canonically disabled and Orion has the GALL to claim ableism is not explored.

_ Genosha is half fall of south Africa Apartheid and half the establishment of the state of Israel hence why the metaphor is so messy and problematic

_ Yes that number is deliberately "like the holocaust but worse" because Morrison likes their holocaust appopriation

_ Why didn't you mention it's an allegory for Gay conversion therapy torture because Bryan Singer is gay?

_ Yes Legacy Virus is Mutant Aids good job on your media literacy finally kicking in Orion

It's racism AND antisemitism but your "antisemtism doesn't exist in america" ass doesn't get that

I do hate "mutie" as slur and the way Kitty thinks it's comparable to antisemtic and anti-black slurs and USES them to make a point, so yeah something Orion and I agree on.

The sequence used is of Stevie Hunter the human ally character who like Xavier started teaching after she became disabled. She IS used as prop here to say Kitty is right in calling her the n-word (Claremont is racist sometimes).

But Orion can't tell her apart from Storm. Buddy if you can't tell the ONLY two black women in this comic apart, you're the racist.

OK they're both props but it proves you never actually read the comics or you can't tell fictional black women apart neither of which is a good look

(Cole also points out the Kitty and Magneto are not White but Jewish he is dogpiled and called a fake fan for this (see below))

Keep Shyminksy out of your mouth you racist fake fan

OH NO! I hate this!

So you decided to go with the colorist idea that the man is darker and the innocent girl in need of protecting is lighter. Gross colorism worthy of a Hollywood action movie where the black guy dies

"Local black man can't related to white disabled teens facing ableism and makes it about racism so he can relate to it" is giving gamergate chud energy to me

If you can't see why a Russian man is almost killed by a mob of xenophobic red blooded Americans and HAVE to make this about anti-black racism that's on you and your misunderstanding of the way Russians were hated during the cold war.

Oh you are race swapping x-men while shitting on Psylocke who the result of basically the same idea? How hypocritical

Dwayne McDuffe does have a point but your quote does not utilize his point in any way.

Then DON'T raceswap Wolverine if he becomes the angry black man. Think before you can X-men racism and tokenism WORSE with your race-swapping

NO THEY DON'T strawman rejected

Ah yes! Magneto, famously a very white man whose childhood was full of white privilege/ Sarcasm

One of the co-authors of the website has the gall to double down on calling Magneto white:

"as a REAL fan you're fake fan, antisemitism doesn't exist and Holocaust survivor Jews are white" - this racist defending his token black friend's racist screed because some guy called Cole DARED call Orion on his bullshit

*"I didn't like that the X-men were about white passing and invislbe disability so I made about anti black racism" also "judiasm is just a religion" canard

**Again leave Shyminksy and Morrison's good takes alone

***Yeah you get Luke Cage, that's how you get the racism of bad Luke Cage comics. You ain't inventing the racist wheel here

Orion I hate your take, I hate your misunderstanding of antisemitism and ableism that makes the two main factions tick, I hate your self centerness, I hate your racist and antisemitic co-writer making excuses for you and I REALLY hate that this did to the 2013 X-fandom what Lily Orchard did to the 2019 Steven Universe fandom and we can still see people using your bullshit arguments today

Oh and Cole? thank you for your service you're the real hero of this story, hated and feared for daring to call out the establishment

#racism #colorism #jews are not white #antisemitism #intersecitionality fail #leftist hypocrisy #leftist brainrot #holocaust appropriation #weekly essay

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chaoticbeanz · 1 year ago

Text

Hellfire's Girl

Summary- A new girl moves to Hawkins and has already made an impression.

Pairing- Eddie Munson x Fem!oc

Warnings- friends to lovers, slow burn, she/her pronouns, cursing, mainly nickname will be used,

Notes- This is my first Eddie fic. Also, I will be straying from the storyline. Please don't forget to comment. I'd love to hear feedback.

Masterlist

Part 2 Part 3

~Lena~

Moving to Hawkins wasn't as bad as I had originally thought. Sure it sucks that I had to leave, but knowing I was only about 3 hours away from my friends made me feel better about it.

Starting my senior year in a new high school on the other hand… blows.

Well, it would have if I cared about fitting in. Back home no one judged. But here? Oh boy did they. I had to keep some of my hobbies on the down low, for now at least. Apparently, Dungeons and Dragons was considered “Devil worshipping”. So much for me trying to find people to teach me how to play. Or so I thought. Barely one week in Hawkins High is all it took for me to make a friend. Or a few.

~English class~

I was sitting in the back because I couldn't pay attention today. I was a passing student so I wasn't worried.

As I tuned out the teacher, I started doodling on what should've been my notes. The only thing on my mind was smoking my last joint that was tucked away in my car. I was unconsciously drawing clouds around the leaf I had made on my paper.

“Hey, New girl.” I heard whispers next to me. Turning my head to see a boy wearing a shirt with the words “Hellfire Club”. Maybe it was a new band?

“Do you partake or just like drawing?”

This felt like a trick question. Was he trying to get me caught or being friendly? I've learned quickly not to trust anyone yet. The jocks and the cheerleaders are the royalty in the ranks. Any lower on the food chain and you're a target no matter what.

He felt my hesitation to the question so he continued, “I only ask because if you need “flower”- he points to my picture- I know a guy.”

That sounds even more suspicious! I lean in slightly whispering, “You do realize how that sounds like a total set up right? Why should I trust you?”

The boy puts his hands up in defense.“That's fair. But wouldn't me asking you just be me outing myself? Why would I rat both of us out?”

“Touche.”

“I’m Gareth by the way.”

“Lena. And hypothetically if I were to say I had “flower”. Would you partake?”

“Uh Duh.” We both laughed silently.

“You seem pretty cool Gareth.” I could tell that took him by surprise but he tried to cover it up.

“Uh, thanks. So do you.” he paused for a second “Would you wanna come sit with me and my friends during lunch? I can't guarantee that you'll think they'll be as cool as me but…” I giggled.

“I’d love to. And trust me if they're like you I'll like them way better than the “royalty”.”

With that said the bell had rung, dismissing everyone for lunch. I put my notebook in my bag seeing Gareth standing in the corner of my eye. Like he's waiting for me. How sweet.

“I have to put some stuff in my locker. You can go ahead and I'll find you.” I smiled at him. He nodded his head but looked unsure. Like he thought I was lying about sitting with them. Nonetheless, he walks out of the room towards the lunch room while I head to my locker.

~3rd Person~

As Gareth walked to the lunch room, he thought about Lena. Was she being serious about sitting with them? Regardless he would have to mention her to his friends. Even if she didn't sit with them she was one of the good ones.

As he walks through the doors, a roar of multiple conversations bounces off the walls. He grabs his lunch and then heads to his table with his dungeon master and best friend seated at the head of the table.

The kiddies arrived just as he sat down. Now was his chance.

“Hey guys, I invited the new girl to sit with us.”

Everyone at the table paused as if processing what Gareth had said. Then a chorus of laughs erupted from the group. “I’m serious!”

Eddie wipes a fake tear from his eye. “Good one Gare.”

“Yeah like a girl is gonna sit with us.”Jeff rolls his eyes.

“You're delusional man!”

With Gareth trying to defend himself and the group in denial, they had not noticed Lena approaching their table.

~Lena~

I rushed to my locker to dump whatever I didn't need for my next classes. Then into the bathroom to make sure I didn't look crazy. I wanted to make a good first impression on Gareth's friends. It’d be nice to have real people to hang out with who are not snobby rich fakers.

When I got to the cafeteria I scanned the room to find Gareth while going through the line to just get some fruit. Surprised that they had peaches I grabbed two then spotted Gareth after I paid.

As I was heading to the table, a blonde cheerleader I met earlier stopped me. I think her name was Chrissy.

“Hey, would you like to sit with me and the girls?” she smiled sweetly.

“Oh thanks but I've got a seat already.” offering her a smile back. I didn't want to hurt her feelings because she seemed like the only genuine popular girl I'd met.

“Oh, that's okay! Maybe next time.” she then walked away to her table.

I started walking again and as I approached the table it seemed like they were arguing about something. Before you could catch what was going on they all fell quiet when you stood in front of their table. Looking at the boy standing at the opposite side of the table.

~3rd Person~

Eddie was not buying it for one second as soon as the sentence left Gareth's mouth. A new girl sitting with them? The freaks of Hawkins High? Yeah right. But alas Eddie believed that Gareth was committed to the bit til he had enough. He stood from his chair and slammed his hands on the table.

“For fucks sake! Why would she…”

He never finished his sentence. Once he saw her walking and stop right in front of his table he was speechless. No one ever makes Eddie Munson speechless.

The boys turned to see why he shut up and were equally astonished, besides Gareth of course. He wore a smug smile, crossing his arms and leaning back into his chair.

“Uh hi. Gareth said I could sit with you guys.”

Silence from the whole table. They just couldn't believe that Gareth was telling the truth. With no response, she tried again.

~Lena~

“Is that okay?” I asked as I looked at the boy directly across from me. He seemed like the leader of the pack so I awaited his response. But nothing. They all just stared at me like they had never seen a girl before. I don't know if I should be flattered or concerned. Before I could feel embarrassed and think this was a bad idea, Gareth spoke up.

“Here, you can sit next to me.” He scooted the chair next to him out for me to sit.

I sat down hesitantly, eyeing everyone as they still didn't speak. Lingering a little longer on the curly long-haired boy. He was cute no doubt. I toss that thought immediately away. Friends Lena. You're making friends. It was too soon to be having a crush on someone.

“Don't mind them. They didn't believe me when I said you were sitting with us.”

Gareth went around the table, introducing everyone to me. Next to him was Jeff. Across from me was Mike, and to his right was Dustin and Doug. Lastly, at the head of the table was Eddie. “Guys, this is Lena.”

I gave them all a smile and waved. Also noticed that they all wore the same shirt. I made a mental note to ask about it.

Dustin seemed to be the first of the group to come to his senses. “So, where are you from?”

“Harrison. It's about a half hour outside of Cincinnati.”

“What made you come to Hawkins?” Mike asked with a confused face.

“Uh, well my dad overlooks construction jobs. The company he works for has a new location. So he decided to move closer since he’ll be running that place.”

Everyone seemed to become more comfortable as I answered their questions. Seemingly deciding that I wasn't a threat. As I talked I subconsciously worked on opening my peach. It was what I always did to them. Slightly crack open the top, and run my finger all the way around. Now and then lick my finger to stop the juice from running down my hand then twist until it splits in half. Once opened I took a bite and noticed they all were staring again.

“What?” I said wiping the corner of my mouth.

“How in the hell did you just do that?” Jeff asked.

I couldn't help but giggle. “It’s my party trick.” I took another bite.

~3rd Person~

“Is that okay?”

The way she looked at Eddie stirred something inside of him. Genuinely asking for permission. His permission to sit with them. He was so dumbfounded to speak. Just taking her in. From her pretty brown eyes to the Queen t-shirt and jeans she wore that hugged her curves in all the right places to her ring-adorned hands holding peaches. She looked godsent. Well, at least that's what Eddie was thinking. He got a weird feeling as he saw you take the seat next to Gareth. Jealousy? What? No way he was already crushing on the new girl?! He barely even spoke a word to her, just listened to her answer any questions the guys had.

He watched her as she absentmindedly moved her fingers through the peach. His mind started creating naughty thoughts he couldn't shake away. The way she licked her fingers, completely oblivious to what she was doing to him. The juice of the peach slipped out the corner of her mouth as she took a bite. All he wanted to do was lick it off her. Oh, how he was already done for.

Jeff was the first to express his bewilderedness. Man, hearing her giggle? Eddie wanted to bottle it up and keep it forever.

“It’s how I've always eaten peaches. They're my favorite,” she says like it is the most obvious answer in the world. Before anyone could ask about the side with the pit, she does the same trick to split it again in half and then pop the clean pit out. She holds out a slice offering it up to anyone. Before Eddie could act, Dustin took the offering.

“Well in that case should we be calling you Peaches then?” Gareth joked.

She pondered the thought and then shrugged with a smile. “I wouldn't mind that.” Right at that moment, Hellfire as a collective decided that from now on they would only call her Peaches.

Tagged: @luv4peterba1lard @arlxtarts @midnyghtsolstice

Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it.

If you would like to be tagged or share your thoughts please leave a comment. It would be greatly appreciated.

part 2 underway

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majycka · 8 months ago

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hi quick random question, do you think Kyoto students and utahime especially her dynamic with Gojo could have been utilised a bit better in shibuya because they have potential if they were fleshed out.

what are your thoughts i just feel there could have been potential.

There certainly was a potential anon!

Reading this linkspooky anon ask, she said that the mechamuru traitor plot line could've been fleshed out more to point out the flaws of the school system(which gege isn't really interested in exploring) thus also allowing us to explore the differences between teacher Gojo and Utahime plus their kids. I agree with what the anon and she had to say so imma try to explain it further.

I know canon told us that Utahime was able to figure out the mole via process of elimination but if we were to really to draw out the traitor plot line, I can imagine Utahime, the investigator, digging deeper into the motive on why possible Mechamaru even considered doing it. She's an attentive teacher afterall so I wouldn't doubt she probably cares about why her kid ends up like that. In this way, we get to see the differences between how Gojo and Utahime treat their kids as well as how the school system using these kids as child soldiers affects them. Through this way, we get to see Gojo and Utahime interact more. I’d dare say that Utahime will probably call out the way how absent and “sink-or-swim” Gojo’s ways of teaching are. I mean, it does work for his students, but sometimes he ignores a crucial and obvious part that they are STILL kids.

That’s the whole point of Nanami’s care for Yuuji who’s originally under Gojo’s wing, and how Yuuji expressed that it’s Nanami underestimating his skills when in fact, Yuuji is STILL a child, and Nanami, as the adult, has to protect him.

Gojo is not too aware of this fact that they ARE still child soldiers because he is raised in the same system afterall. However, with Utahime’s caring, and doesn’t-take-any-bullshit-from-Gojo personality, there’s no doubt she’ll call the fuck out of him.

Moving on to the actual students themselves, I actually like how Gege kept the Kyoto kids lowkey in this arc and when they showed up, they were a team (even Todo included with his help with Yuuji). I'd like it more if we were shown how the Kyoto kids navigated the culling game arc because the game could have forced Kyoto plus Tokyo to cooperate with each other. Maybe even under Utahime's wing because most of the adults got nerfed in Shibuya. Also, Kyoto kids offer the weaker pov things in the series, and I'm all out for underdog characters. There’s just lots of inner conflict going on when you’re in a world who favors the strong while the weak gets hammered down.

Moreover, another thematic potential I can think for the kyoto-tokyo dynamic is sharing comradery on entering adulthood. This is somehow shown with Kamo & Maki vs Naoya fight, and imo, this fight is a good CANON example that "at the very verryyy least" fulfilled the potential of the Kyoto-Tokyo dynamic.

More yapping under the cut cuz this is actually one of my fav fights in CG arc >.<

The goodwill event shows the battling philosophies of the schools, however it also shows how complementary they are..Kyoto wants to be understood in a lashing out way but Tokyo merely responded with callousness to it and has the "who cares what others think" mindset.

Nobara and Momo fight on misogyny

Mechamaru expressing his disability with panda

Megumi vs Kamo "We are the same"

Maki and Mai "why didn't you left the Zenin clan"

I mean Tokyo ain't wrong about their individualistic mindset but at the same time, it just sounded unsympathetic especially when all those kids are all in the SAME boat being child soldiers under the jjk ruthless system. Kyoto kids unhealthily lashes out but they aren't wrong about it either cuz it's a reality that they suffer a lot from this system. These openness of Kyoto Tech however did make them closer like mutamiwa and kyoto girls (mai, miwa, momo).

Overall, Tokyo needed the Kyoto comrade nature while at the same time Kyoto needed the independence of Tokyo kids and in that kamo-maki vs Naoya fight, it showed us how these philosophies made a great working teamwork for them...

Recap to that fight, Naoya shows up as a cursed spirit and boom maki has to deal with it now luckily Kamo is there to help. With the help of Kamo's teamwork, Maki was bought some time to recover (deal with those samurai and sumo duo) and boom defeat him.

Kamo sympathised with Maki’s situation after the fight. Even back in the fight with Megumi, Kamo seems to be one trying to seek understanding from kids under the big clans because he kinda understands the pressure they are under. Despite barely interacting on screen, it's no wonder 100% Kamo backed up Maki. Moreover, what makes this fight pair up fulfilling is the parallels they have despite being different ends of the spectrum. They even opened up about their family problems, and this is coming from Maki who tends to keep to herself.

"Don’t fall in the same rut."

Maki opens up and give advice in communicating more to their family because Maki regretted not doing the same for their mom, and we cut to throwback of the Kamo’s mom was that she named him Noritoshi just to spite the Kamo clan.

I've seen criticism about this part. It's pretty shitty the mom named her kid practically Hitler, abandoned the same kid, and expects the kid himself to come back, and I agree with the criticism. However, looking at it from a different angle, it's shown at the same time that jjk is a coming of age series, kids growing into adulthood aka shouldering the shit that adults have failed to do...

Adults can be shit at doing their job to their kids like what Kamo's mom did to Noritoshi. Like c'mon mom! you could have done your job as an adult and be the one to approach your kid or pull him out of the clan situation but no. Sometimes the Reality is fully accepting that parents are shitty sometimes and the kid of the situation has to push themselves to be mature and take over the adult's work, and as for Kamo, that is having to be the one to find his mother to find closure and from then on, he will be the one to decide what will be next.

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mindful-of-ideas · 1 year ago

Text

Preference: Peaky Blinders

- Being the youngest Shelby sibling

Characters : Arthur, Thomas, John, Ada and Finn

A/N: Based on this request here, by anon. I'm sorry it took so long!!

Arthur:

When you were a baby, your mom always made a point that all the boys were to help take care of you. She understood that the age gap between you and them was big, but she wanted to make sure that you had a relationship with your brothers

So, every now and then, Arthur would help by babysitting you. He would tell everyone he hated doing it, but the truth was that he loved it. There was something about you that calmed him. Maybe it was how tiny you were, how fragile you looked, but every time he held you, he felt much more calmer. Even as you got older, that feeling stayed. Every time you would be alone together, he would be more calm and gentle. When he stayed overnight to look after you, you didn’t have to be scared of the monsters under your bed, because you would fall asleep in his arms before even getting to bed.

As you grew up, however, you started to notice how violent Arthur could be towards others, and that scared you. So you drifted away from him slowly. You knew he would never hurt you, but his strength was still enough to scare little ten-year-old you.

However, one day, you came back from school with a black eye. Some guy had been teasing you and you finally had enough. The thing was, when you punch people, they tend to punch you back, hence the black eye. Upon seeing your face, Arthur went completely mad, but you tried to calm him down.

“You should see his face, this is nothing,” you said pointing to your eye.

“Still…” he grumbled, “let me take care of him.”

And after that day, Arthur decided he was going to teach you how to fight. This was something you have secretly always wished for since on one hand you wanted to be like your brothers and train, and on the other, you wanted Arthur to teach you again. Again, yes, because when you were younger and he was still babysitting you, he had taken the time to teach you how to draw. Everyone kind of knew he used to draw when your mother was still alive, but we were almost certain you were the only one who knew he still did it. Now, you were no master painter, so you would usually take out a book or study while he would draw, trying to furtively glance at what he was doing.

Even if he wasn’t babysitting you per se, you kept this up until you were finished with your secretarial studies. He would sometimes stay overnight on Tommy’s request, to keep an eye over you. For a period of time, it was the only way you could see him. You had decided to keep up with your studies, as your mother (and Tommy) would’ve wanted. Secretary sounded like an easy way out of Birmingham and a life away from crime. But as you got more and more educated, Arthur became more and more distant. You never truly understood it. How did learning about shorthand and typing meant that you didn't need your older brother anymore? When you moved out to work in London, you almost lost all contact with him.

After a few months of being a secretary, you got bored, bored and exasperated. You couldn’t stand the weird creepy men that were constantly flirting with you and the endless paper job that always had to be done for the next day but was almost never even used or looked at then. If it was only up to you, you would revisit the way the whole company worked, but it wasn’t. So, one day, you made a show of yourself and finally snapped. You screamed at everyone and left, going back home, going back to Birmingham. News travelled fast, and since Tommy had been the one to recommend you to that company, everyone knew what had happened before you even set foot in town. Arthur, he was overjoyed. Why? Because you just proved that you COULD be a little like him. But his joy just made you feel worse. You wanted to cry. You had lost your only way out of crime. You locked yourself in your rooms for days before someone could finally reach out to you, and it was Arthur. He didn’t say much, mumbled some kind of apology. But he sat by your side and waited. He waited until you rested your head on his chest and wrapped your arms around him. Then, he hugged you, held you close, just like when you were younger.

Tommy:

Tommy never really showed interest in you when you were younger. The age gap was big enough that you understood why he didn’t really care. And, truth be told, you didn’t mind that much either. Just because he didn’t show any particular interest, it didn’t mean that he didn’t care. Because he did. He cared deeply. After your mom died, he made sure you were never missing anything. He’s the one who decided that you and Finn should be raised by Polly. And he meant it when he said raised. He trusted her to make you into the best version of yourself and to make sure you could, if you wanted, live a life away from crime. He loved you enough to know that he wasn’t the best person to raise you.

When you were younger, he never babysat you. However, Polly always made sure to ask your brothers first when she needed help with you and Finn. She would also ask them when she didn’t need help. If it was only up to her, you would’ve grown up in the same house as your brothers, or in a house where they would always be in and out of, the way it would’ve been if your mother was still alive. But she knew this was impossible. Still, Tommy would sometimes come over to dinner or watch over you for the evening. Sometimes Polly proved to be convincing and Tommy would babysit you all day or all night. These were your favourite times. Maybe it was because you didn’t see him much or maybe it was because he was the only one to never baby you. He talked to you almost as if you were an adult and was always real with you. He would also answer all of your questions, even the craziest ones.

“But how come the trains can manage the curves, the wheels look too straight to handle that?”

“How about I take you to see them someday?”

“You would?”

“Of course.”

When he stayed the night, you would do everything to stay up as late as possible. But as it got darker and darker, you would get more and more scared. You could hear weird noises coming from outside, or was it from under your bed? Tommy, however, knew you could be reasoned with. You didn’t have to be afraid of the monsters under the bed because he could convince you, even for just one night, that they weren’t real.

Growing up, you stayed close to him. As unpredictable as he could be you knew you could always rely on him. He would help you no matter what. When you landed your first job, he sent you flowers but never came to congratulate you face to face. He knew how hard you were trying to appear as strong, tough and independent and he didn’t want to mess that up for you. Whenever he was in London, he would make sure to have dinner with you, paying for everything, of course. And you never asked where the money came from. As much as he tried to keep those dinners casual, he would always end up asking you too many questions about your work, your ambitions, your future.

He wasn’t disappointed when you lost your job, saying however how amazed he was that you lasted so long. He took you out to dinner that night, to celebrate “standing up to assholes and staying true to yourself”. He didn’t ask if you needed help to find a new job but left a flyer for a job in a science lab at your flat that night. It also mentioned that there were opportunities to go up the ladder by taking classes that they would pay for. You had always been a quick learner and weren’t too bad at science and math at school.

You got the job and invited him to dinner straight away.

“Of course you did!”

“You know what’s funny?”

“Umh…”

“At my old job, they were always saying how I need to have more chemistry with my boss, guess that won’t be an issue now.”

He snorted and started laughing.

It was one of the few times you had managed to make him laugh.

John:

John was already a teenager when you were born and he just had no time to give to a baby. That’s when he told his friends anyway. And to the girls, once he figured out they found it cute, he would say he was taking care of you. In reality, he did take care of you. Unlike Arthur and Tommy, he was home most of the time and had to help around a bit so that your mother wasn’t overwhelmed. He would mostly run errands but much preferred to stay home and take care of you. Once your mother died, he stayed around. In his mind, there was no reason for him to stop being there for you. Even if Polly thought he was more foolish than his brothers, more prone to make mistakes, she knew she could trust him when it came to taking care of you. She had no problem leaving Finn and you with him for days if she needed some time to herself.

Being around John always made you feel happier. There was something to him that just lifted your spirit, and made you want to laugh even when you were sad. He couldn’t quite bear seeing you unhappy or scared either. If you were afraid of the monsters under your bed, he would hunt them down for you, creating magical weapons with anything he could find just to see you smile before you fell asleep.

If you ever had problems, or just needed someone to listen to you really, you would go to him first. He would never judge you, of course, but as you got older he would sometimes scold you. Maybe it came with having kids of his own, you weren’t quite sure.

“Polly told me about the boy.”

“What, how did she know. That’s what I came here to talk about!”

“Y/N, you can’t just go around punching people.”

“He tried to… do… stuff to me.”

“Alright, where’s the bastard then!”

“Arthur is already on the case.”

“You told him all that?”

“No, he just saw the bruises and asked for a name, I gave it to him.”

“You okay though?”

“Yeah… I’m okay…”

He knew that if you wanted to talk more about what happened you would be back. And you were. It took you some time but you eventually told him everything. There wasn’t much he could actually do, but he listened and that was enough.

To everyone's surprise, he was the one who helped you the most when you moved to London. You wanted so badly to prove to everyone that you could make it on your own, but the truth was that you knew nothing, nothing at all. It took weeks before your apartment started to resemble somewhat like home. You were surviving of canned food and still hadn’t figured out how to do your laundry.

“Y/N, you know you can buy something else than canned food, right?”

“I know…”

“You know but…”

“But how do I cook it… what do I do with it?”

He laughed.

“Come on, we’ll buy some stuff and I show you.”

“While you’re here, how do I know when my laundry is clean? How long do I have to let it soak? Do I really need to split the white and the colours?”

And he had the answer to all your questions. With his own experience as a father and all the times he helped your mother as a teenager, it felt like he knew everything.

To him, you were always going to be the best aunt to his children. It was maybe the one thing that stressed you out, him having such high expectations about something you couldn’t really control. One day, Katie told you she hated you out of pure 5-year-old rage. You left the house that day crying, thinking you had failed as the coolest aunt. When he learned about what happened, John laughed before comforting you. He explained to you how Katie didn’t really mean that and that she actually probably already forgot about the whole thing. As he said that, the little girl came waltzing into the room and, as she saw you, her face lit up and she rushed over to hug you.

Ada:

When you were younger, she was all over you. She would dress you up, put makeup on you, take you out to do all the girly things. She was maybe the only one of your siblings to not shy away from showing you love. She would hug you and cover you with kisses whenever she could. She also made sure that you felt empowered, which was really important for her. Never did you feel like you were less just because you were a girl. You never had to be afraid of the monsters under the bed because they were too scared to go after a strong little girl like you.

Things took a turn once you got accepted into the typing program. You couldn’t tell if it was jealousy or not but she abruptly stopped making time for you. She wasn’t particularly rude or anything, just less present. One day, she came by to talk to Polly but found you, sobbing, instead. To your surprise, she didn’t hesitate and rushed to your side, trying to comfort you as best as she could. It was like the last few months of coldness never happened.

“What happened? Talk to me Y/N, I’m listening”

“It’s that stupid Beatrice and her stupid mom!”

“Who?” she asked, knowing you wouldn’t answer.

“She keeps making trouble in class, messing with everyone,” you said between sobs, “and she blames everything on me!”

Ada brushed your hair away from your face.

“And her fucking mom is the teacher, so of course she never believes me! And they talked of kicking me out… and… and… oh Ada, I’ve missed you!” you said hugging her tightly

Once you stopped crying and explained everything properly, she told you how to deal with Beatrice, in true Shelby fashion.

“And if that bitch messes with you again, I’ll handle it myself,” she added smiling.

After that, you had a lot of catching up to do. She explained how at first she had been jealous of you for finding an easy way out of Birmingham, but in the end, realized that it wasn’t such an easy way out in reality and that she could never do what you were doing. She respected your choice and told you how she admired your strength. It made you feel weird yet weirdly happy to know that the person you had looked up to all your childhood as a strong empowered role model was now looking up to you.

Once you moved to London, things got better. Even if you were younger, she was your best friend. And her little boy loved you! You were still not the best with children but you would do anything for that boy, just like you would do anything for John’s kids. When you got your first job, she took you shopping just like when you were younger. She was so happy for you.

And once you lost your first job, she didn’t say anything or taunt you. She took you out shopping again, to keep your mind off of things and let you hang out at her apartment as much as you needed. She was the first person you told about your new job at the science lab and she was even more happy for you than before. Once the classes started, she even helped you study and she was quite good at it. She could remember more of the stuff than you could, often finding weird but effective mnemotechnic tricks. You told her that she should apply herself, pushed her to do so, but she kept refusing. You were scared that by pushing her you might anger her again. This time, however, you took the time to talk to her before things got worse. She told you how, even though she was good at remembering the stuff, she didn’t have any interest in it. Not like you did. She didn’t take offence at you trying to help her find a job outside of the family business but it just wasn’t for her. You respected her choice and since then have been the best of friends.

Finn:

He has always been your best friend. Yes, you were younger than him but it wasn’t by much and it never really mattered. Unlike your older siblings, you barely had any memories of your mother and, when you were young, you couldn’t really see why they hated your father so much since you almost never heard of him. This shared lack of memories made you bond with Finn. Maybe you couldn’t remember your mom teaching you the alphabet, but you could remember the tone of her voice when she sang to you at night. You remembered her sweet and flowery smell when you would hug her and the coldness of her hands every time she went to pick you up from the couch to put you in bed. These things seemed too abstract to share with anyone else but Finn. He was the only one who could understand. He had this sensitive side to him that he would only reveal to you. The way you could both just lay on the floor and reminisce at such futile things war always a comfort to you.

When Polly took you in, there was no going back. You became inseparable. You shared a bedroom, tucked away at the end of a dark hallway. You weren’t afraid of the dark or monsters under the bed, you were too old for that now, but the eeriness of that hallway always made you both jumpy and left you on edge. Finn and you would then come up with the funniest stories to try and calm yourselves before going to bed. It almost always involved killing the obviously not-real monsters, just in case. You didn’t have to be afraid of the monsters under the bed because you would team up and invent the most successful monster repellent.

School was always a bit hard for you. A girl, a Shelby girl, trying to stay quiet and just do what they were told looked weird, out of place. You would literally be quiet and stay out of everyone’s way but still get picked on. It was like people wanted to get a reaction out of you, just to then shove in your face the fact that you were indeed just another Shelby. You were grateful for Finn and his friends. As soon as he took notice that you were being picked on, he made sure that his friends and he would hang out close to you. You had a few friends yourself, but they tended to scatter when bullies approached while Finn and his friends would always step in. He was also close to a few girls from his class and if they found you just reading alone outside, they would sit around you, playing with your hair, not letting anyone get too close. You weren’t scared of the bullies, you truly believed you could punch them in the face and win, but you hated the attention. You just wanted to go to school, learn, have fun and be left alone.

As Finn got older, he started ditching school more and more often. That was why he wasn’t there when you had to defend yourself.

“You managed?” he asked.

“I did.”

“I knew you would.”

“Right…”

“I’ll be there next time, I promise. But come here. I bet everyone told you they would beat up the guy but no one took the time to look at your eye?”

He was one of the only one of your siblings to actually know how to handle cuts, and bruises, and burns. Even the flu stood no chance in front of Finn. You were glad he was skipping less and less classes just to make sure you were okay. Maybe he couldn’t do math to save himself but he had a natural talent in understanding the human body. And its mind. You truly believed that if he stopped sleeping in English classes, he would get something better than average. He had such a wild imagination and such a great empathy, an understanding of human nature.

“That’s actually decent,” he once said picking up one of your essays.

“Thanks, I learned from the best,” you said pointing at your copy of Hamlet.

“Ahh Shakespeare…”

“No, you! Idiot. It’s your copy, and there are notes all over it!”

He was a bit bumped when you moved to London, mostly because he felt like he was trapped in Birmingham. He thought it was too late for him to deviate from the Peaky way. He had doomed himself and had to live with the consequences of his own decisions. You didn’t believe that, obviously, and made sure to let him know that, whenever he would realize it too, your door was open.

And he came. He was knocking at your door before you even learned that Tommy had kicked him out. You helped him as best as you could, but money was tight and, if you wanted Tommy to keep giving you your allowance, you had to hide the fact that Finn was staying with you. You didn’t agree with Tommy’s decision. Family was family. Kicking him out of the business was one thing, leaving him to fend for himself after promising him everything was another. Tommy knew that Finn had nothing apart from the Peaky Blinders. What he did was unfair. You hoped that with time, Tommy would come around and change his mind. Meanwhile, you had to get this boy a job and he was in luck. Your friend at The Daily Herald had just told you they had been looking for young boys to help around with the printing presses.

#mindful-of-ideas #peaky blinders preference #requested #peaky blinders #arthur shelby #thomas shelby #john shelby #ada shelby #finn shelby #arthur shelby preference #thomas shelby preference #john shelby preference #ada shelby preference #finn shelby preference #tommy shelby #tommy shelby preference

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dragondemoness · 1 year ago

Text

Broken Brush - Toko Fukawa x Ultimate Artist Reader

Description: Toko falls in love with a talented artist, but they're unable to continue their talent after breaking their hand.

Type: Oneshot

Genre: Angst

Fandom: Danganronpa (Trigger Happy Havoc)

Toko never cared that much for art. It was fine and all, but it just wasn't for her. She never understood the appeal of going to museums to stare at mindless pieces when she could just stay home and be productive with her writing instead.

But that changed when she met you.

She had heard your name around Hope's Peak, and she had passed by you in the hallways once or twice. You were known as the Ultimate Artist, and of course, Toko wasn't remotely interested in anything you did. But as she strolled through the hallway one day, she stopped.

You had set up an art stand outside of one of the classrooms on the third floor, and students were lining up in front. You had your art set up for them to buy, and you even had prices for commissions, so they could pay for custom art if they wanted to. And surprisingly, the art caught Toko's eye.

Your pieces weren't like those mindless paintings from museums; the ones that made no sense to Toko, and honestly looked like they were painted by five-year olds.

No. Your art was stylized, and it looked simpler than museum pieces, but that was exactly what appealed to Toko. Nothing was abstract or all over the place, and she could comprehend it even if she took her glasses off.

For once, she actually understood why people were willing to pay for art. She ignored the ringing bell and lingered around the hallway until the line died down, and she walked up and approached your stand. You were friendly and polite as you greeted her and asked what she wanted to buy.

The second you asked that, she drew a blank. She felt like her brain was suddenly on autopilot when she approached your stand, and she couldn't figure out what to say. Should she compliment your art? Should she buy something?

After stressing and working up a sweat as the silent pressure started to get to her, she suddenly pointed at one of your pieces and blurted out, "Th-That one!"

You looked surprised and mildly confused, but packaged up the piece before giving her the price. It was surprisingly reasonable, almost too cheap for what she was paying for. But she paid for the piece and left after stuttering out a "thank you."

After that, she started spending more time around you. She started with buying commissions of some of her book characters, then she recruited you to work as the artist for her books. It was a lovely partnership, and over time, it developed into something more. Not only did you teach Toko the value and appeal of art, but you taught her the meaning of genuine love.

Things were perfect for the two of you, but after some time, you ran into a casualty. You decided to expand your talent of drawing and painting to sculpting, and as you were helping your client carry an incredibly heavy piece, your grip slipped and the clay piece fell down and crushed your hand.

You forced a pained and awkward smile and played it off to your worried client before rushing to the school nurse, who then proceeded to call the hospital. Your hand was set and wrapped in a cast, and the doctor gave you an estimate of 5-6 weeks to heal, but advised you not to use that hand for any activity.

After hearing that, your heart sank, and the pain in your hand was somehow washed away by dread. It didn't help that the broken hand was your dominant hand, meaning that you couldn't draw with it. You couldn't take commissions, and the ones you were already working on had to be put on hold.

You were already imagining how your clients would react. Angry, disappointed, constantly blowing up your social media asking for updates. The thought of seeing their disappointed faces after you told them crushed you.

Toko rushed into the office with a fearful expression, and after telling her about your worries, her reaction wasn't the most supportive.

"Y-You broke your hand, and you're w-worried about drawing?! F-Forget the stupid art, that's not wh-what's important right now!"

She was only acting out of worry, though she couldn't imagine how she would feel if she was unable to write. Seeing tears in your eyes, she let out a sigh before sitting down next to you and taking your good hand in hers. "S-Sorry. I know it's d-difficult, but you'll be fine. Once your h-hand heals up, you'll b-be able to get back to your j-job in no time."

You hoped she was right. The day after that was the beginning of the longest and most agonizing weeks of your life. You bit the bullet and told your clients about your hiatus, and they were understanding and wished for you to get better, though you were still worried about disappointing them.

You also spoke to the headmaster and he gave you a pass from uploading your art onto the Hope's Peak website as your hand was healing, since it was required to prove the legitimacy of your Ultimate Talent.

Alongside your stress about your commissions, you were also restless. You were growing antsy without something to do with your hands, and even though Toko tried to lift your spirits by talking about her new characters and even taking you to a museum, all it did was fill you with inspiration that you couldn't act on.

Out of desperation, you tried learning to draw with your other hand, and you were even tempted to draw with your broken hand anyway, even though Toko sternly dissuaded you from that. Nothing worked, and all you could do was keep your patience.

Once the day came to get the cast removed, you were ecstatic. Finally, you would be able to resume your passion, and you couldn't stop thinking of all the drawing exercises you would do to make up for lost time, and in case you had gotten rusty. But you were discouraged from drawing for at least a few days to not strain your hand too much, which was somewhat disappointing, but you were at least grateful to have it back to normal, or so you thought.

Unfortunately, that wasn't the case. Even after you could use your hand again, it gave you horrible cramps. The doctor had warned you that it was possible, considering the way the bones were injured, but the pain was so unbearable that you couldn't even focus.

You got a wrist brace for your hand, and you even tried physical therapy to help it move, but nothing seemed to work. You talked to the headmaster and received another extension of two weeks from uploading your art, and you did everything you could think of to fix your hand. But after a week and a half passed, you were called to the headmaster's office.

You were nervous as you dragged your feet up the stairs to meet him. The extension wasn't over yet, so you were confused about why he wanted to see you. Did he just want to check on you? Was there an issue with the website? Did he maybe even want to make the extension longer?

Soon, you walked in and sat down in front of Headmaster Kirigiri's desk. He greeted you with a curt nod as he fixed you with a serious expression. "Hello, Mr./Miss (Name). So, how is your hand doing?"

You hesitated to answer, and looked down to avoid his searing gaze. Your first indistinct was to lie and say that it was great, but if he asked why you hadn't uploaded any new art, you would be in trouble.

"Well, um... It still cramps up whenever I use it." Your voice was small as you forced yourself to meet his gaze, and he simply blinked in response.

"Are you still able to create art?" You winced as you felt the pressure growing, and you looked down again as you gave your answer.

"Um, no, not at the moment... But sir, the extension isn't--"

"I decided to call it off early. Unless you're confident that you'll be able to continue making art in the four days you have remaining."

You looked back at him in shock. "Early? I don't understand..."

"I'm going to be frank with you. We recently scouted another talented artist from another school. If you're unable to perform, you will be relinquished from your status as the Ultimate Artist and it will be passed to them."

You felt your eyes well up with tears as you processed this. "Another artist? Who is it?"

"I won't be naming names, but if you aren't able to continue making art at the end of the four days, I'll be forced to strip you of your Ultimate Talent. Do you think you can do it?"

You looked away without an answer as the tears began to stream down your cheeks. As much as you wanted to say that you could, and beg Headmaster Kirigiri to give you another extension, you already knew that your time as the Ultimate Artist was over.

Taking your silence as confirmation, Kirigiri continued. "Listen. I think that you're a talented artist, and you still have the potential to succeed. But you must understand, Hope's Peak Academy is not just an average high school. It's designed for the most elite and gifted of students, and I'm afraid that if you're unqualified, there just isn't a place for you. Whenever a tool breaks, you don't use it anymore, right? Or in this, a paintbrush, I suppose. You simply find another. Do you understand?"

You shakily nodded without a word, and you were soon given the resignation forms to sign, signalling that you were officially forfeiting your Ultimate Talent, your dorm, and your place at Hope's Peak Academy.

You soon returned to your dorm to spend your final night at the school, and the next morning, you began packing up your things. Soon, there was a knock on the door, and Toko walked in. After seeing what you were doing, she looked at you in confusion.

"Wh-What the heck are you doing?" You turned to her with a dull expression. "I'm packing all my things. I'm leaving the school."

"Why?!" You turned away in response, doing your best to hold back tears. "Mr. Kirigiri is kicking me out. If I can't make art anymore, then I can't stay."

Toko stared at you in shock before clenching her jaw in anger as her hands started to shake." Wh-What?! Th-That's ridiculous! You still have f-four days left on the extension, c-counting today!"

You continued to pack up your things, still doing your best to keep your composure. "It's not enough time, Toko. Even if my hand is capable of healing all the way, I'm useless if I can't do anything. So they're giving the talent to someone else."

"D-Don't say that, dummy! You're not useless! And wh-why are you just a-accepting it?! Why are you j-just giving up your t-talent to some rando out there?!"

You paused and slowly turned to look at her, and at that point, your tears finally released from your eyes. "When a paintbrush breaks, I don't use it anymore. I just get another one and keep working like nothing happened. It's the same thing for me. If I can't draw, I can't be here. That's all there is to it. There's nothing I can do."

Toko fell silent as she stared at you in surprise, and she looked away with a look of sorrow in her eyes before muttering that she would visit you after school. Soon, you got all your things together, and left the dorm without another word.

Toko did keep her promise, and came to visit you after school every night. Sometimes, you even spent the night together, though she still returned to the dorm to avoid going to her own house.

Even though Toko did her best, you knew the arrangement would decline. You knew that she would be busy with her writing and schoolwork, and wouldn't always have the time to visit every night. Kirigiri did give you permission to visit school grounds, but you weren't allowed to stay during the evening.

It was just as difficult for Toko, too. She missed visiting you in your lab every day, working together with you on her books. She missed seeing the bright smile on your face as you advertised your art in the halls. The new Ultimate Artist had a pleasant and sunny attitude, but Toko wanted nothing to do with her. No one could ever replace you, and she despised the headmaster for what he did.

You still continued physical therapy, and continued doing hand exercises, though it made very little progress. In the end, you knew that nothing would be the same after the injury, but you could only hope that it would change for the better as time passed.

#danganronpa #danganronpa x reader #danganronpa trigger happy havoc #toko fukawa x reader

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