#“ugh I am NOT reading all that” loll

[junosmindpalace]

GEMINI BIRTHDAY BASH!

🎧 it's so sweet, knowing that you love me.

synopsis: celebrating their birthday...w/ the hq gemini men!

pairing(s): timeskip/present!hajime iwaizumi, koshi sugawara, shoyo hinata

content: references to 2024 dates but doesn't need to be strictly speaking (iwa's is more 2021), food (in suga's and hinata's), very short and brief angst(?), otherwise all fluff and fun!

total wc: 3.6k

a/n: it was my birthday a few days ago (june 17th) and i thought i would celebrate by writing for some gemini characters! i know shoyo is a cusp but i wanted to write him too </3 also this was my first time creating a graphic please be nice i am aware its a little plain </33

HAJIME IWAIZUMI: JUNE 10TH

The clock in your living room reads 11:55 in the evening; Hajime’s birthday is five minutes away. 

You both have work in the morning, so you should be in bed sound asleep. Everything has been done as normal; the whole nighttime routine of eating dinner (that you insisted on making) together, showering, brushing your teeth. Except instead of completing the routine by cozying up in bed, you’re cozying up on your living room couch, the light in the kitchen on, and the blue light from the TV keeping your tired eyes in a trance. 

Hajime’s arm is lazily outstretched over your shoulders, your fingers intertwined with the hand that dangles beside your head. His other arm is bent sideways on the couch pillow, head against his fist as he watches through bleary eyes the movie in front of him. Though your eyes are trained on the action on the TV, your ears don’t process the mumbling that pairs with it, too engrossed in your low conversation about each others’ day. 

“—and Hinata wanted something more to do for himself, so I’ll be reviewing his progress and seeing what I can do. Seriously, the guy is a monster at times. Sometimes it’s hard to believe I’m really looking at him, with how far he’s come since his high school days.”

“They all seem to be of another caliber now,” you replied somewhat drowsily, yet no less engaged.

“They’re intense, that’s for sure,” he sighs, bringing his head to rest behind the cushion and leaning closer toward your own. “But they’ve always been like that.” 

He’s completely unaware of the time and date approaching as he drones quietly about the day he’s had. He notices, on occasion, your glances up at the wall where your clock was located, and thought you were anxious to get to sleep.

“Hey,” he nudges your knee with his own. “you wanna head to bed?”

“Hm? No, no, not yet. Keep talking, I wanna hear.” 

Upon your insistence, he obliged reluctantly, resuming his chatter for a little while longer as you hum and nod. 

He feels comfortable like this, with your head against his chest, body snuggled close to his side, the low hum of the TV, the dim light. He, for a moment, finds his eyes gently closing unconsciously. You wait for him to continue his explanation at a pause, but are only met with the quietness of the TV. A slight stir prompts Hajime’s eyes to open immediately, and he shifts a little as he takes in your face, peering up at him through small eyes.

“Haji.”

“Mm?”

“You sleeping?”

“M’not.”

You placed a hand on his chest as you turned your body to look at the clock. It now reads 12:04 in the morning. You rub your eyes and reach for the phone on the coffee table in front of you, and when it blinks to life, it blinds you with the time and the new date.

June 10. 

“Ugh, put that away,” Hajime groaned as he turned away from the straining light on your phone, lolling his head to the other side against the couch cushion. You quickly slid it back onto the table, and then collapsed again against your boyfriend’s chest, hugging his middle tightly and digging your chin into his chest as you looked up at him with a wide smile.

“Happy birthday, Haji.” 

His eyes reopen slightly, and he angles his head toward the clock to view the time for himself: 12:05. 

He tucks his chin in so he meets your gaze and the sweet, tired smile on your face, and finds one of his own, tired yet tender, slowly propping up the apples of his cheeks. So that’s why you had been eyeing the clock, all for him and his silly birthday. Of course it would be you who remembers his birthday before he even does. You were sweet and thoughtful in that way.

“So that’s why you wanted to stay up a little longer, huh?” His tone is a faux annoyance for only a moment before his arm around your shoulders curls a little tighter in endearment, and he knocks his forehead against yours, gently and playfully, as you let out a short giggle at the gesture. “Thank you, baby.”

“What do you wish for?”

“To get some rest,” he yawned as he pulled away, going to sit up from the couch. 

“Why would you say that? Now it won’t come true!”

Your weight on his lap and arms now thrown around his neck anchored him to the couch. He gives you a deadpan look as a hand finds its way rubbing gently up and down your lower back, while the other slowly snakes itself under your legs.

“Oh, I’ll make it come true.” 

You squeal when he sits up and scoops you up in one swift motion, and you throw your head back in quiet laughter as he walks the two of you to your bedroom. 

“Haji, you know, it's your birthday. I should be the one carrying you.”

He snorts, and shakes his head. “ It’s my birthday, right? I get to do what I want.” 

KOSHI SUGAWARA: JUNE 14TH

Sugawara was dejected when he realized he had to work on his birthday.

As if the universe was taunting him, this year it fell right on a Friday, just one day off from the weekend. 

If he were honest, however, it wasn’t too much of a bother. He mentally groaned about it the evening before and morning of, but all in all, his birthday was a fleeting thought in his mind. Work and everyday busyness replaced the thought with lesson plans and mental preparedness to handle a classroom of young children after an exhausting week. 

He hoped, at the very least, however, that you would recognize the oddness of the day, do a little something to acknowledge it. Maybe a small cake or a nice breakfast. Maybe a little present. Hell, just a small, intimate murmur of a happy birthday accompanied with a sweet kiss would elevate his heart. Yet every time he looked on at you, you were preoccupied with preparing yourself for work, just as Suga was. No fancy breakfast was prepared, no gift sat on the table by the door, and the only kiss he was able to snag was a hurried one on the cheek as you wished him a good day, and headed out the door and into your car. 

So Suga’s birthday was not off to a great start. 

But again, it’s only a birthday. He almost feels a little dumb, getting all worked up over it, especially as an adult. So he makes the most out of the day as he always does with his kids and their lively attitudes, plus the wind down time and lack of work reserved for Friday’s brightens his special day from the dejected morning he experienced earlier.

Little did your boyfriend know of the plans you had in store for him.

As humble as Sugawara attempted to be about his birthday, you knew that he liked having it acknowledged. He was appreciative of any and all kind birthday gestures, from simple greetings to thoughtful presents. And you wanted your present for him to be thoughtful. Memorable. Surprising, exciting, and able to convey the sheer amount of affection you hold for him, though you doubted that any gesture could entirely convey such a thing. But your mission this year was to sure try.

You had taken the day off to get everything under way. Pick up a nice cake you ordered a few days before, with Suga’s favorite flavor of icing and batter, along with a neat and heartfelt Happy Birthday written on top in cursive. 

Once the cake was tucked away in your fridge, your next stop was a party store. Perhaps you may have overdone it with the decorations, you had thought to yourself when you examined your two (full) shopping bags as you walked back to your car, but there was just so much to choose from, and you were sure Suga would like it all! Banners, balloons of impressive and wacky sizes and shapes, streamers, confetti, party poppers; you couldn’t pass up a single thing, not when you imagined his enthusiasm over each one. 

Your final stop was for restocking on foods and drinks. Besides the cake, you bought a couple of bottles of fancy alcohol (the one’s he’ll often eye and make fun of how posh they sound), a couple of his favorite snacks and beverages, and the like. 

By the time Suga arrived home from work, he’s exhausted, yet somehow invigorated by the idea of seeing you. He lets himself into the house with his key, letting out a tired I’m home, heart picking up when he spots your shoes neatly organized in the genkan, and joins his own beside them as he pads further into your home toward an alluring smell. 

The light is low in your living room. It’s enveloped in a yellow glow compared to the blinding bright white that startles him awake and strains his tired eyes in the morning. The first thing that comes into his line of sight, besides you, already in comfortable clothing with your back turned and managing something on the table in front of you, is a neat and beautiful cake on the coffee table in front of your couch. 

Your living room is full of more animated color than usual; batches of balloons occupy the corners and a few are scattered, some hovering aimlessly, on your floor. A Happy Birthday banner hangs from above the threshold into the room. Suga, once the initial shock and surprise wore off and was able to fully comprehend that it was all for him, felt that he may burst into tears. 

You hurriedly turned around upon sensing a new presence in the living room, and gasped when it was none other than your boyfriend, briefcase in hand, and staring dumbfounded at you and the sight of your decorated living room.

“Ko! I didn’t expect you to be home this soon!”

“Traffic was sparse.” He managed to get out past the lump in throat, but once he realized how stupid he appeared, he shook his head in an attempt to feign nonchalance. “So! What is, uh…what’s all this?” 

Your brows shot up, and you gave him an exasperated smile before walking over to him. “It was supposed to be a surprise,” you said slyly, wrapping your arms around his neck, with Suga immediately reciprocating with a hand to your back. “I was still setting up some stuff because I was under the impression that I still had some time before you came home.”

“Oh, so you wanted me to get stuck in traffic, is that it?” He teases in a faux annoyed tone, but it’s quickly betrayed by the smile that immediately stretches back over his face. 

“In this instance, yes!” You laughed, grinning yourself when he began to pepper kisses all over your neck and face, curling his arm around your waist to keep you secure against him. You laughed breathlessly through the assault, attempting to push away the ticklish sensation. But Suga’s energy had just been replenished fully, and his heart elevated the highest it ever could. 

“It’s perfect, all of it. Thank you.” he halts his assault to mutter against your skin through his lovesick smile, and it brings a grin to your own lips as you bring him in for one final kiss on his lips, one he immediately attempts to deepen. 

“Okay, okay,” you laugh as you pull away when he whines and chases after your lips. “Now that you’re here, let’s sing!”

He laughs too, letting you drag him further into your living room, abandoning his briefcase by the wall as he sat himself down on your couch, and you came over with the lighter you were previously fiddling with to light the candles on the small cake. 

All he could think about as you sang to him enthusiastically was how giddy he felt, and how lucky he was that he was spending his birthday in such a manner with you. And when he blew out his candles, the wish at the forefront of his mind was to spend many more birthdays with you in this manner

(and maybe a new car). 

Even as you shooed him into the bathroom to change into more comfortable clothes as you cut yourselves slices to enjoy by the TV, and afterward retreated to bed, he muttered, “I’m still mad that you tricked me, by the way.” as the two of you closed your eyes.

Which earned him a swat to the chest. 

SHOYO HINATA: JUNE 21ST

Shoyo absolutely cannot deny the fact that he’s had a great birthday since the moment the sun rose in the sky.

His special day began with an influx of texts and calls from family and friends to wish him a happy birthday, and use the opportunity to catch up with him. Nearly every moment of his morning was taken up by a different phone call that he took as he prepared himself for the training he had that day. When he arrived at the training center, his team immediately pounced on him, greeting him with enthusiastic cheers and a round of singing. 

And while he can almost say his birthday was perfect, with all the texts and calls he received and the thoughtful birthday treatment, his one and only regret was the fact that you weren’t there to celebrate with him.

His birthday this year happened to coincide with travel for upcoming tournaments, which unfortunately meant that you wouldn’t be celebrating alongside him in person. But just because you weren’t there in the flesh to hug him tight and sing loudly in his ear, it didn’t prevent you in the slightest from doing whatever you could virtually to make him feel good on his special day. 

At least, he had hoped it wouldn’t.

He had picked up your call eagerly on the day of his birthday, and grinned from ear to ear as you sang to him loudly and exaggeratedly. When you finished your song and exchanged all your morning pleasantries, to his absolute dejectment, you had informed Shoyo with a guilty tone that you would be unable to call or text for the majority of the day. 

“I’m sorry, Sho, something suddenly came up for work, and I’m going to be swamped. I’ll call you tonight, I promise!”

The disappointment he felt was tremendous, yet he easily covered it up with an understanding nod and reassuring words that he’d stay up to catch your call. It wasn’t like he was really expecting your schedule to be free the entire day so he can call and text whenever. Besides, he was miles away from you; it would be selfish for him to expect that your schedule would be all free for him when his wasn’t. 

So Shoyo made the most out of his birthday without you, and there wasn’t a moment where he wasn’t grinning. Enjoying delicious meals, being on the receiving end of all sorts of enthusiasm,  excitement and birthday traditions from friends, family, colleagues and fans alike; each kind birthday gesture lifted his heart to Cloud 9. 

The day concluded, after practice in the training facility when the sun began to die out in the sky, with Shoyo’s team insisting that they treat him to a celebratory dinner at some nice restaurant with some excellent international cuisine, allowing him to get a small taste of home. And Shoyo’s stomach was starting to churn, and it wasn’t like he was about to pass up a free meal…

The company took cramped spots in a booth inside the restaurant, bringing a few spare chairs to form a full circle around the large, polished wooden table jutting out from the wall. The setting sun meant that there was still some time before the restaurant could anticipate a more busy dining area.

Shoyo was spoiled with trays of meat, bowls of rice, and all sorts of other cuisine that he sampled from the plates of his colleagues. By the time the sun had nearly fully disappeared beneath the horizon, each one of their appetites was satiated, full and content with their meals.

As if Shoyo’s birthday couldn’t get any better so late into the day, it was about to become complete in the most unexpected and perfect way imaginable. Though the team was full, they could spare the appetite for a dessert, the most fitting conclusion for a birthday: because what’s a birthday without a cake? 

Shoyo’s team accompanied him home with eager conversation, yet strange occasional whispers among themselves. Perhaps all the celebration was all a little too much? 

When they arrived in a large group by his front door, Shoyo took notice of poorly hidden sly smiles and eager eyes from the teammates across from him, exchanging them among themselves as he fiddled with his keys. 

He’s the first to step inside the dark room, calling out to nobody in particular an I’m home!, as was routine for him to do. His heart suddenly stops, however, when he hears a voice answer. 

“Welcome back!”

His teammates burst out into chuckles and giggles. “Ah, it looks like our dessert is here!” One of them nodded his head toward the living room. 

When Shoyo makes his way reluctantly further into his apartment, initially confused, his furrowed brows immediately relax when he turns on the overhead light, and he feels as though the breath had been stolen from his lungs and hitched in his throat. 

At first, he thinks that perhaps he’s gotten a little homesick being without you, his special person, on his special day. He’d been thinking of you in intervals at every peak of his day. Surely now his exhaustion is crashing down on him, making him see things?

But your eager grin and short laughter as you took in his shocked expression tells him otherwise. You were here, in the flesh, standing right before him--

He all too suddenly finds himself squeezing you tight in his arms, and you immediately reciprocate with one hand coming around his neck, collective aww’s and teasing ew’s going round at the affectionate sight.

“Hold on there, Shoyo, the cake!” 

He quickly steps away when he suddenly feels an object collide gently with his side, and he only partially lets you go as he steps back to look at a box you were holding in your other hand. You grinned at him. 

“Surprise!”

He doesn’t dare let go of your hand even when you set the cake down and urge him to take a seat on his couch, taking an electronic candle you had bought on your way to his apartment and placing it at the very center. His entire team begins to sing to him once more as they crowd around him on the couch and around the table, this time with you joining in standing beside him, and his smile feels almost painful with the way it doesn’t falter for a second. 

When the song ends, a round of cheers go around the table, and you remove the candle to place it in a napkin. You turn toward each other, and you place a hand on his shoulder as you lean down to give him a kiss on his temple and mumble a more quiet, personal happy birthday. 

And just as he was about to lean over to capture your lips in an enthusiastic kiss, let thank you after thank you fall from his lips for such a grand surprise, all for him, you grabbed hold of his head, turned it back toward the cake, and shoved his face right into the center of it. 

Gasps and cheers alike went around the table, and the rest of his team laughed at the bold and sudden gesture. He could hear your own soft laughter as his face gradually emerged from the cake, and the shrills and hollers from his teammates grew louder as they took in the sight of the icing and chunks of cake sticking to various sides. They continued to bark out laughter as he wiped the chunks away from his eyes, staring at them on his fingertips before turning toward you, hiding a smile behind your hand as you mouthed over it an I'm sorry.

Shoyo rose silently halfway from his seat, leaned over toward you, and before anyone could properly call on what he was about to do, smeared the cake on his hands onto your own face, and a new wave of audible surprise and amusement went around the table.

“Oh, so that’s how it’s gonna be, huh?”

“I hear you, Shoyo,” one of his teammates hovered over his seat as he took a large chunk of the cake with his bare hands, and immediately smeared it onto his colleague beside him. “You look better like this, anyway.”

The table erupted into chaos, with the remainder of the unassualted teammates running away from the assault. 

“Quick, scatter, before they get us too!” 

“Oh, you aren’t escaping that easily!” 

Running, breathless laughter, and shrills of alarm rang out in a chaotic symphony throughout the apartment, but amidst the chaos, only you and Shoyo remained by the couch side by side, hunched over laughing at each other’s ruined faces. Despite the ruined cake, the madness in his home, and the icing running down your faces, Shoyo’s heart thrums with love and happiness, and he steps forward to cup your cool cheeks and halt your giggles by capturing your lips in a deep and (literally) sweet kiss. 

Now, perhaps, Shoyo could say his birthday was perfect.

return to masterlist.

[gay-mooshrooms]

I fear to stain your clothes with blood/Stain them. I don't care

Chapter 1

Look.

Maybe Wilbur didn't love going to camp.

Maybe he would whine, and complain, and annoy the crap out of Phil and Techno on the 3-hour car ride.

But! 

That did not mean he hated it. 

Sure it was far from the most enjoyable experience in the world. 

But sue him, the kids gave him some small shred of hope for humanity that he was oh so desperately lacking. 

It also helped that Tommy adored Camp Essempi. He had practically grown up there, been tagging along every summer since he was 7 after Phil bought the place. 

So now Wilbur found himself in his dad's grey van, listening to The Artic Monkeys at a very unhealthy volume, while he could see Techno gesturing in the seat in front of him. 

If he had to guess, Tech was probably monologuing about some new book he read or what he was planning for the campers or something.

Wilbur didn't really care. 

Tommy was directly next to him, and his head was now resting on his shoulder, where it had been slowly creeping toward for the past hour, in spite of him claiming, "Fuck you Wil! I'm not tired at all bitch!"

They really needed to work on his swearing problem.

But that was for another day. 

Right now Wilbur had to worry about how to stay sane with 2 more hours left on this car trip.

He debated trying to read a book he brought but considering the last time he'd tried reading a book in the car they'd had to pull over so he could throw up, he decided not to risk it. 

Listen to Techno rant? Wilbur thinks he'd rather take the vomit at that point.

He eventually just decides to take the easy way out. 

Turning his music down slightly, he lays his head on top of Tommy's, stretching the blanket he'd been hogging across them both, and letting his eyes shut. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

By the time he woke up, they were only 30 minutes away from camp, and Tommy was still dead to the world. 

Techno had fallen asleep at this point too, his head lolling so his long hair fell over the edge of the car seat.

How he lived with it that long Wilbur would never know. 

He removed one of his earbuds and was met with the soft sound of Here Comes the Sun drifting from the radio, Phil humming along quietly. 

A few seconds later, his dad looked up and saw him awake. 

"Oh Wil!" Phil said, smiling, "Didn't see that you were up. We stopped at McDonald's about 15 minutes ago and got some fries for you, figured you'd be hungry."

Wilbur immediately brightened and maybe grabby hands at his father. 

"Gimme food," he said, with all the eloquence of a toddler. 

Phil chuckled and handed over the brown paper bag. 

"Save some for Tommy, you know he'll be starving when he wakes up, and who knows what that will entail."

Wilbur nodded solemnly, suddenly reminded of the last long car trip they'd taken. 

A few minutes into starting on the fries, he felt Tommy stir beside him. 

"Ugh, do I smell food?" Tommy asked, his voice slightly hoarse. 

"Always hungry never satisfied," said Wilbur, which was not entirely inaccurate. Tommy ate like a fiend. 

"Ey!" Tommy blurted out, his head immediately shooting up and his hands raising. "Just cus you're as small as a twig doesn't mean I have to be. Plus I heard Niki's running some of the sports stuff and I am NOT doing that on an empty stomach."

Wilbur had to give him that, Niki, one of his old camp friends and now first-year counselor, was one of the nicest people he'd ever met, but also incredibly badass. 

She'd been one of Techno's favorite campers, and he, in turn, had been her favorite counselor, which meant she was an expert in most combat-based camp stuff. 

She terrified Wilbur and Tommy alike. 

Techno too, but he would only admit that to her.

"Fine fine gremlin child take your food," huffed Wilbur, handing over the bag.

Tommy grinned evilly up at him and began shoveling the food into his mouth like an animal, a raccoon perhaps. Or maybe a possum. 

Wilbur couldn't help but grimace and turn his attention back towards his older brother and father, who, now that Techno had woken up too, were discussing camp setup. 

"Listen, Phil," one of Techno's quirks, he almost never called Phil dad. "We have more campers this year, we're gonna need to buy some more stuff."

Phil shook his head, "It'll be fine Tech. And if not, we'll go out and get stuff. And anyway, it's not so much supplies I'm worried about but space. I think we'll have to raid some of the unused cabins for cots. The last thing I wanna do is force kids to sleep on the floor, "said Phil, chuckling. 

"It would be good for them, " Wilbur chimed in, "Builds character."

Phil laughed. 

"C'mon Wil, let's not give them scoliosis too early on in the summer."

"As I just stated, character building."

"Wilbur I swear to god."

The last 20 minutes of the drive were spent bickering about random topics or singing along to Hamilton.

The latter was, of course, Wilbur's request. 

But Tommy joined in too. 

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sudden sound of crunching gravel alerted Wilbur to their imminent arrival at Essempi, a sound that bore equal parts joy and pain in his mind. 

It was at this point Tommy began bouncing off the walls, it was honestly a miracle he's lasted this long.

Usually about 2 hours in they had to stop for 15 minutes and just putter around a gas station.

Fortunately, Tommy had stayed up late last night with Wilbur, going over rules and his luggage over and over again to make sure he didn't forget anything. 

But once rested, Tommy's energy made a full recovery, and as soon as they had gotten their luggage out of the car he was full-on sprinting towards their cabin. 

Wilbur however, did not not follow so eagerly. 

Unlike Tommy, car trips didn't make him stir crazy, but rather tired, lethargic, and dead on his feet.

So, grumbling, he hoisted his backpack over his shoulders and grabbed his duffle, before trudging down the path behind his little brother. 

It didn't take long for his dad and Techno to catch up, his older brother giving him a small pat on his shoulder before moving past. 

Phil on the other hand, fell into stride alongside Wilbur and started humming Dear Theodosia, one of his favorites. 

"How are you feeling Wil?"

The words startled him, he hadn't exactly been expecting conversation. 

"Uh, fine?" he said, with a slight question in his tone. 

"I mean, a bit tired but nothing horrible."

Phil nodded, "OK. Just let us know if you need anything."

Wilbur couldn't help the small sigh that escaped him. 

He understood that his dad meant well. That he genuinely cared and wanted to help. But this was not what Wilbur needed. 

He never did well at the whole talking about your feelings thing. That was definitely Phil's department, and something he always encouraged in his kids. But somehow Wilbur never got the hand of that particular skill.

He didn't think any of them did really.

But he didn't say this, or anything remotely similar. 

Instead, he just nodded and said softly, "Alright, thanks dad."

Phil smiled, laid a hand on Wilbur's shoulder, gave a small squeeze, and then he was gone. 

Wilbur paused for a second, looking around at the slowly darkening sky, where the first glimpses of stars were visible.

He glanced at the trees, shaking in the slight breeze that was making him glad he wore a hoodie.

And finally, he looked back down the path, where beams of warm light could now be seen.

Wilbur took a deep inhale, readjusted his bag, and continued walking.

It was gonna be a long couple of months.

[thesweetestdevotion]

https://www.tumblr.com/thesweetestdevotion/761276923476361216/can-u-do-reading-for-2025-is-it-gonna-be-better?source=share

like general collective? like are we gonna get another corona etc? 🫣

i'd love to! thanks for requesting a general reading, its the first one ive done here, youre a lil trailblazer hehe!

2025 General Collective Reading

Dice: Mars, Aries, 6th house

Tarot: Five of Swords, Ace of Cups, Four of Wands, Two of Coins Reversed, Seven of Coins Reversed, Ten of Coins, Queen of Cups Reversed, Five of Wands, Strength, Three of Wands

im getting a lot of downloads right now... like back to back (usually i get a few spread out as i read) im just going to tell it how i see it and feel it, however please be aware that i am not infallible! especially with a big energy like this, im not capable of acessing all of what is going to happen next year, so ill just state what i see right now.

As i was holding the dice in my hand i saw red, literally (my room is entirely blue so...) and then i dropped the dice and got Aries, Mars, and 6th house... guys this is literally war. let me explain, Aries is the 1st sign of the zodiac and is fire, ruled by mars. With aries showing up with mars (planet of war) and 6th house (house of open enemies, the exaltation of mars), im feeling like we might be dealing with conflicts and tensions worldwide. Now this does not signify WW3, dont freak out at all. but im seeing that several countries will make new alliances with each other and we might see the rising of a new world power(powerful country) come on the global stage. This also goes along with the five of wands, im seeing arguments and small conflics here and there that are building tension in the collective energy, this could lead to a war but i just cant see that far out. i felt like spirit smacked me in the head loll maybe im trying to see something much bigger than i can describe here, also protests? i just heard. New trade deals, routes, and more are being discussed. sales of arms, weapons, artillery, these things will be prevalent as the year progresses.

now for the human collective, im seeing that our relationship to labour is coming to front stage. Two of Coins Reversed, Seven of Coins Reversed, Ten of Coins, Queen of Cups Reversed, all these cards speak to how we relate to our work and labour. Im seeing alot of emphasis on proper compensation, labourers rights, work-life balance, surging prices, costs of living, all of these topics have been relevant for a few years now, but im seeing in 2025 things are going to boil over. The sixth house is also the house of daily labour and work, and with mars showing up there, we will see a lot of sentiments about finding meaningful work that is fair and pays well and allows individuals to cover their living expeses without worries. i think the previous mentioned protests could have something to do with this, but maybe not irl protests, but just people's voices being heard and their concerns finally being taken serious. I think the collective is longing for stability (i know im one of them) and next year makes me feel hopeful that we will finally have a change in the right direction, however small it is.

Another thing im seeing is an emphasis on foreign travel. we might see more people migrating out of their countries in search for new opportunities (im not seeing a specific country just a general energy) im also interpreting this as implementing foreign inspired ideas, laws, regulations, etc. like some countries are seeing the succesful laws of overseas and saying lets give this a try. Marriage law?? this just jumped out, which makes sense with the four of wands here.

also something about women is becoming relevant, idk if it is also legislation or maybe a new collective energy being embraced by women. I feel upset rn all of a sudden ugh. something about motherhood, love, emotions, femininity, nurturing, relationships. this energy is so muddled though i cant see thru it as of now.

The overall energy is that of the Strength card, which tells me there is an emphasis on building things, beating enemies, and destroying barriers and limitations. I feel hopeful for 2025 but i dont think itll be an easy year(when has it ever been hehe)

I hope you enjoyed this reading! lets all come back in a year, you can yell at me if i was wrong lol (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

[shivunin]

Hello there! ✨

New prompts? Here we go.

I was talking of Moby Dick yesterday with a friend, so of course it must be number 7, for whomever you'd like to force in the same bed with a soon-to-be LI!

Ooooh this was a really tasty one! Thanks, Arja c: I am really happy with this, and it bridged a gap in the timeline I've been fiddling with for a while.

(But. Arja, I gotta ask: as someone who has not read the book in question, is there an 'only one bed' scene in Moby Dick???)

(Tropes Prompts)

For 7. Muses are forced to share a bed:

Back to Back

(Arianwen Tabris/Zevran | 2,015 Words | CW: Canon-typical references to darkspawn/death/the Blight, alcohol mention)

The three of them stood just inside the doorway, various packs already piled off to the side. The room was comfortably warm, did not smell of dead bodies, offered two beds, and featured a fire burning already in the hearth. By the standards of the rest of the castle, it was the height of luxury. Even so, they hesitated. 

Morrigan spoke first.

“I will not be sharing, in case either of you have fostered any such foolish notions,” she told them acerbically. “‘Tis hardly fair for the Crow to have the whole bed to himself by simple virtue of gender.”

“Did I say anything?” Arianwen asked, arms crossed. When she opened her mouth to go on, the Crow in question spoke. 

“I am not so delicate as I look. Surely I can manage one evening’s sleep on stone, yes? It will still be an improvement on packed earth.”

“No,” Wen said sharply. “You are not a dog.”

Zevran turned and stared pointedly at Wen’s mabari, who’d already slung himself over the foot of the bed in question. His tongue lolled out in canine delight and his fur was clean for once, as she’d given him a cursory bath before sneaking him into Redcliffe’s castle. Wen was probably the only one who could make the hound move, and she had no intention of doing so. The poor fellow deserved a soft bed for once. He worked as hard as any of them.

Morrigan, plainly assured that she need not participate in this conversation, turned and walked away. In Wen’s periphery, she could see the witch beginning to draw some sort of sigil over the stone before the door. Good. These people were dodgy as any she’d seen.

“I will keep my hands and knives to myself if you will,” Tabris told Zevran coolly. “It is no closer quarters than we share in camp, Crow.” 

One of his eyebrows arched, but he inclined his head slightly. 

“As you wish, my lady.”

“Don’t call me that,” she snapped, hunching her shoulders. “Ugh. Warden, if you won’t use my name. You’re not my servant.” 

She was certain she did not imagine the glint of mockery in his eyes when he swept her an elaborate bow. 

“As you wish, my dear Warden.” 

She didn’t like that either, but she suspected further objections would meet with further prodding. Wen ignored him and went to the far side of the bed, where she could at least shed her armor in peace.

“Not a dog, not a servant,” Zevran murmured to himself, unbuckling his armor on the other side of the bed. “I find my employment opportunities sadly diminished so soon.”

“I hear the Crows have an opening,” Wen told him, casting him a sharp look, and he grinned at her. 

“Let us hope, for both our sakes, that they do not know it yet.”

“Hmph,” was all she could muster in response. Her armor slapped the ground when she tossed it down, but the release of its burden was too much of a relief to stay annoyed. Wen sighed and stretched her hands behind her head, rolling her head first one way and then the other. When she glanced up, the assassin was pulling the covers back and climbing beneath them. 

“Ah—did you want this side?” he asked when he saw her looking, one leg on the mattress, the other on the floor. Wen narrowed her eyes at him. 

“No,” she said. “Just don’t take all the blankets.”

He smiled again and opened his mouth, but she held up a hand. 

“I’m not in the mood for jokes,” she told him. “I might still have to kill a child to save this place. Just let me sleep.”

Zevran shut his mouth and nodded, climbing silently beneath the covers. Wen joined him a moment later, thinking poisonous thoughts at the chamberlain who’d stuffed the four of them in this room. It made strategic sense to stay in one room, but…

But the nightmares were not going to be kind to her tonight. Perhaps it would be wise to warn him before…before. 

“Hey,” she said when Zevran rolled over. 

He glanced over his shoulder at her, his hair backlit by the hearth behind him. For a moment, he looked almost gilded with it—a foolish notion. Wen pushed the thought aside with a vague sense of irritation. It was already hard enough to find the right words; it did not help that he was so plainly assured of his own good looks. She certainly wasn’t going to add to it. 

“Yes?” he said, when she didn’t go on. Wen pressed her lips into a hard line and rolled over onto her side. This corner of the room was shadowed, blocked from the light by the broad lines of the bed and their bodies. 

“Nevermind,” she said instead, biting the end of the word off. “Goodnight.”

A pause, sheets rustling behind her, a quiet breath. Morrigan still sat before the door, her legs crossed, her hands palm-up on either knee. Arianwen did not know if she was meditating or taking first watch and she didn’t intend to ask. Morrigan wasn’t going to kill them while Wen slept; that was all she really needed to know right now. 

“Goodnight, Warden.” 

|

Tabris stood in a wide field, surrounded by heaving bodies on either side. They tossed around her like a river of putrid flesh, horrible syllables clawing their way from ruined throats, sick weapons waving in the air. None of them took notice of her, but they did not leave her space to breathe, either. 

If she stayed here for too long, she would surely choke to death on the smell thick in the air. Even as she knew this, she knew, too, that leaving was impossible. 

There was no way out. She was trapped on all sides. She would die here and be carried onward, like a rotting tree branch in a blood-filled stream, until all the bits that made her distinct from anyone else were worn away by the tide. She knew this with a surety she could not question or define, and the knowledge of her own death bound her hands from fighting back. 

In the distance, a beautiful song rose, as cloying and thick in the air as the smell of unwashed bodies and burning flesh. She was drawn to it even as it repulsed her, caught in the inevitability of the sound and everything that it meant. The archdemon was calling her. She had no choice but to follow, hands bound and feet heavy with the sound. She had no choice. She had—

Wen sat up, gasping for air. 

One hand dragged at the neck of her tunic, loosening the ties even as she clawed her own skin. Something shifted beside her and she flinched away, knocking her head against the carving on the headboard. 

“It is only me,” Zevran said in the darkness beside her. Tabris relaxed slightly, though she still panted for air. 

The fire had died sometime in the night, leaving darkness and a chill in its wake. She could not see him, but she could hear him, could feel the shift in the bed when he moved again. After a moment, something soft brushed her hand. 

“Wine,” he told her. “It will help.” 

Wen abruptly remembered something Morrigan had said to her when Wen had brought him back to camp. She’d said something about him poisoning them all one day and killing them in their sleep, or words to that effect. Tabris unstoppered the wineskin anyway and took a sip, letting it clear some of the thickness from her throat. She took a longer pull a moment later, then passed it back to the left. Zevran took it from her silently, his hand never once brushing hers, and she could hear him drinking, too. 

“Nightmares?” he asked. 

Wen, whose breath had finally begun to slow again, nodded before remembering he couldn’t see her. 

“Yes.”

“Hmm,” he said. “I thought that might have been you several evenings ago.”

“Yes,” she said again. Her screaming had woken the whole camp. She was not proud of it and did not appreciate him mentioning it again now. But—he had given her his wine. That allowed him some leeway, she supposed. 

“All Wardens have them,” she added, touching the marks she’d made at her neck. Some of them stung, but she didn’t feel blood. That was good, she supposed. “Alistair is used to them, he said. They are still new to me.”

Zevran made a noise of acknowledgement, then swallowed again. 

“More?” he asked. 

Wen hesitated. She could feel the wine burning in her stomach, too much on an empty stomach. She hadn’t been interested in the castle’s offer of food, but she regretted it now. 

“Yes,” she said, and took the wineskin from him when it brushed against her hand.

“Every night?” he asked. 

“Most nights.”

The wine was red, sharp, faintly bitter at the end. Wen rolled it over her tongue before swallowing, tasting each note as intensely as she could. They chased the last of the nightmares from her mind, to her relief. The wineskin was mostly empty when she passed it back. 

“I’ll buy more wine on the way out of town,” she told him, the closest she would come to an apology. Zevran moved—perhaps he shrugged—but he, too, must have remembered that she could not see him. 

“There is no need,” he said. 

Wen snorted and slid back under the sheets, flicking her braid out of her way as she went. No need, he said, but she knew how this worked. She would buy him wine and she would not owe him for this. She was no fool. 

“Sometimes, in Antiva, I would…feel for a bedmate or a weapon,” he said carefully, “when I woke and I did not know where I was. It helped, I think.”

Wen said nothing and she did not move. Zevran drank again, then moved on his side of the bed. His foot brushed against her calf when he rolled over, but neither of them acknowledged it. 

“Goodnight, Warden.”

“Goodnight,” she hesitated. “Zevran. And—thank you.”

“It was my pleasure.”

Wen grimaced at that. She rolled onto her side and held herself still for a moment, thinking. At last, she sighed and shifted backward until her back brushed against his. 

“Warden?” 

His voice was wary. Wen frowned, ready to move again. 

“You were awake, too,” she said sharply. “So—here. If you have another nightmare.”

His back was tense against hers. She wasn’t sure how to interpret that. 

“Nevermind—” she began, but he was already speaking. 

“I—thank you, I did not mean—”

“I’ll move if you—”

“No, there is no need; I was not asking you for—”

“Fine, then, shut up and go to sleep. It doesn’t have to be a whole—a whole—thing.”

Ser Grr snored loudly at the foot of the bed, startling them both. When she finally recognized the sound, Tabris snorted and tucked an arm under her head. If this was the caliber of pillow the people in castles used, she supposed she was happy enough with the rolled-up blanket she’d left in the camp. How glad she would be when they saw the last of this place. 

“This makes us even,” she said after a moment. “For the wine.” 

At last, Zevran relaxed back against her. The next breath he took pressed his spine to hers. It was an odd sensation, and not one she was entirely sure she enjoyed. Wen waited. 

“I said there was no need.”

“You did.” 

“But—very well. We are even. Save the life debt, of course.”

“Of course,” she said, though the idea of him owing her a life debt still made her deeply uncomfortable. She wedged the pillow between her arm and head and tried to make herself comfortable again. 

The last thing she remembered before she fell asleep was the sound of his breathing, quiet and even behind her, and the soft pressure of his back against hers. She did not wake again until morning.

[lorelune]

im too shy to come off anon atm but tysm for the 2nd part after scrap metal. i quite literally screamed (internally, since i was with someone when i saw it) and after reading it, im well fed but just as starved for more OTL

idek where to begin w my thoughts, ugh, you write blade so well. SO WELL. like maybe ppl can write unhinged characters fine, but you. YOU. are so different with that. ill probably find the words in the future to describe what im feeling about this series(??bc it technically can be standalone) but all i can say is that im with the mind to print your writing out and eat it. like, chew it with my molars and swallow it, and then print another one to eat some more, maybe put some slices on my next meal LOLLL. idk, i want to consume it and have it in my veins.

i for real cannot come up with the words to describe this,,,,but i promise im not crazy !! (debatable tbh) i just really like WORDS and WRITING and this just made me just as insane as blade's probably feeling. it's beyond just being giddy bc one of my fav authors wrote for one of my fav charas and it happened to be a reader insert -- there is a fundamental nutrient being provided by your writing and it could have been for any fandom/show, and i probably wouldve had a similar reaction.

your writing has always been wonderful and captivating, but there is smth about the way you wrote blade's pov (brOTHER there is so much ART in the way consciousness was expressed, im frothing at the mouth--) in this and scrap metal that i think really showcased how well you write. like i said, this piece could have been for any other fandom (and i'd still read it bc you wrote it <3) and i know it wouldve hit me like a truck all the same.

this got super long bc it's late where i am but i really wanted to let you know how much i appreciate your work and the talent you have with writing, and this blade series made it so that i couldnt keep these thoughts to myself !!

ik this is only my 2nd ask but since idk when ill come off anon (bc im shyyy) i hope you dont mind me calling myself "slightly feral anon" LOLL (or if you have a better name it's up to you!!)

anon anon ANON (slightly feral anon = sfa anon FOR SHORT!!) thank you for the ask!!! and for reading and enjoying scrap metal and braised!!! 💕✨!!!! i am glad i could provide some fundamental nutrient rich chewable good brain feeling writing 🫡💓

TRULLLY blades pov is fascinating. it's what inspired me to write scrap metal to begin with!! i was thinking abt blade pov in present day game timeline and was like "damn he'd be fucking crazy :3c". i had such immediate brain worms and had to play around with it!!! the whole idea really grabbed me!! the prose hit too so hard like. this guy is not gonna think or feel in a way that is linear and its been SO indulgent and fun to write!!!

not to mention :3c i am excited to write more of these dynamics :3ccccc miss kafka does thing to me on a soul deep level and the relationship between her and blade and her and reader is so twisted and wretched and its so sexy of her. i'm excited for more of the yan olympics

SFA ANON!! thank you for this ask it has brought me much joy 🙏!! thank you once again for the kindness and for reading and sharing your thoughts, your feedback is very appreciated!!!!

[taco-night-frenzy]

Luigi and the Shy Guy Mystery

Here's a WIP I wrote at 3 AM when I should have been writing my Vivian story. I don't know when I will ever complete this, but have fun ---------

Knock knock knock! Bang bang bang–knock knock knock! Like, oh my god, knock knock!!

“Yeah?” Daisy groaned from the sofa, leg dangling over its arm lazily. Some secretary…

“Customer!!” a nasally voice shouted from behind the door. It didn’t take a mediocre detective like me to tell that whoever it was, they were in a rush. I don’t like dealing with people in a rush.

As if reading my mind, Daisy shouted back, “Can you chill, maybe? The detective doesn’t like it when people rush him.”

It sounded very sweet to the unaware reader, but she still did not move from her languid lazing like an ancient member of royalty. In fact, her screaming back only made the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end more!

“Uhhh, like, not really??” the voice responded, still pounding on the door. “It’s not really a chill moment, okay?? Can you, like, just see me now?”

Daisy yawned. I felt like the knocking was coming from inside my skull at this point. “Yeah, not really liking your vibe at the moment? Don’t think we’ll be taking your case, sorry.”

I would like to make it very clear that this did not help with my stress. Guilt coursed through my veins with a heaping helping of ‘There’s-A-Chain-Chomp-About-To-Bite-Me!’ anxiety on the side. My mind reeled with potential ways to get out of this situation or ways to fix it or… ah, I couldn’t think with all the noise! What was the right thing to do!?

“Oh my GOD, are you, like, serious right now??” the voice shouted a pitch higher. This couldn’t possibly be anyone I knew, couldn’t possibly be anyone that even my brother knew. She was her own original character for sure. “I am, like, sooooo FREAKING in trouble, you don’t even KNOW, and you’re just, like, gonna totally leave me to rot out here without even listening to me?! You know, I didn’t, like, think anyone could be worse than John, but you guys are like, even LAMER!”

Daisy’s leg twitched, but she remained in her God-of-Decandancy mode, albeit very stubbornly. She mumbled to herself, “Lame? I’m not lame, I’m like… the least lame one…”

“Ugh!” the voice outside cried. “Ugh!” Its cries began to pick up in tempo. “Ugh! Ugh! This is SO lame, oh my GOD. I would have never thought that Mario of all people would leave someone, like, totally hanging like this when they’re in distress!”

“Mario’s not here!” Daisy shouted back, with more thoughtfulness for me than I realized she was capable of. I very much expected her to word that worse.

But she was right.

Mario was not here. Mario was never going to be here. It would only ever be me. Luigi. I couldn’t be expected to fill in his shoes, I shouldn’t be expected to do everything he would do.

Something cold, like a chilled pillow, brushed against my hand.Red lit up the gloom of my office as the Polterpuppy’s collar bounced and jingled by my chair’s side. He gave me an encouraging lick and wagged his ghostly tail, tongue lolling with excitement as the loud noises continued.

Ah. Encouragement. To do the right thing? The forgiveness to let me turn someone down? Or just…

Encouragement.

Plain and simple encouragement. 

Do whatever makes you happy, Luigi.

“I’ll-a-see-a-them,” I said meekly, my voice barely breaking above the shouting, stutters and all.

Daisy actually shot up at that. She turned her head to me, eyebrow raised. “You sure?”

I nodded. I wasn’t sure. I wasn’t sure of anything. But I figured this would only give me more grief if I kept trying to ignore it.

Daisy shrugged. As if she wasn’t just the laziest girl in the world a moment ago, she shot up to her feet without so much as a stumble. She unlocked the door and slammed the door open, jumping to the side as if to say, ‘I’ve done all I can do here!’ before flopping down onto the sofa again with a gymnast's grace.

The Shy Guy came barrelling in like a Twister, red robes disheveled and little nubs swinging. Was he coming to attack me?! He looked like any other Shy Guy!

“Oh my GOD–FINALLY!” With a hop, the Shy Guy planted himself firmly on the chair before my desk, shoes kicking in the gloomy wind. Polterpuppy yipped and barked at our new guest but knew (mostly) to give them space.

Just who was this Guy…? Why would what appeared to be a completely normal Shy Guy be in need of my services so badly?

“Valley Guy,” Daisy mumbled.

Huh?

She waved a wallet lazily in the air. “ID says Valley Guy’s his name.”

Agh! How many times do I have to tell her, no stealing from a potential client?! Even if it looks ‘really cool!’

Valley Guy snatched his wallet back with an angry huff before plopping down on the chair before me again. His mask barely even saw over my desk. Charlie and Marissa (my Fire Flowers) completely overshadowed his little red hood.

Valley Guy… hm… I’ve never heard that name before and never seen it mentioned in Mario’s notes either. Certainly a new person, but something felt wrong…

It wasn’t a pun. It didn’t even seem to match a theme!

No, no, something wasn’t right…

“That’s because, like, something totally isn’t right about my ID!” Valley Guy said. 

Oops. Looks like I had been mumbling my thoughts again.

“My name’s Valley Girl! I’m a Shy Girl! Not a Guy!”

Oh my Star Goddess! How rude of me! How cruel of me! I apologized profusely. I have a friend who would feel horrible if I misgendered her like that…

“Oooohh,” Daisy mumbled through my apologies, completely denying her own. “I get it! Valley Girl! Now the name makes sense.”

“Right???” Valley Girl said, excitement filling her voice. “Listen, I’m not, like, mad or anything?? I just think you look kind of, REALLY stupid for not knowing I’m a Girl?? Like, hello?? Look at my rockin’ bod? Listen to my beautiful voice? If I’m not the HEIGHT of femininity, then I, like, totally don’t know what is??”

I would just like to be extremely clear here, journal. From my perspective, Valley Girl looks like a completely ordinary Shy Guy. No bow, no pink, no suddenly long-beautiful locks peaking out of her mask, no makeup… and her voice sounded just like any other Shy Guy’s. Not that I am denying that she was a Girl! I just think that maybe I’m not that stupid.

“It kinda was obvious, Luigi…” Daisy chimed in, shaking her head. “You do look a little stupid…”

Daisy was the one who said she was a Guy! Her misinformation is the entire reas–

“Listen, can we, like, both agree that this green guy should be a lot smarter for a detective and move on?” Valley Girl said.

Daisy nodded solemnly. “Preach it, Girl.”

I just–! But–!

“Your clearly sub-par perceptive skills aside, like, we should prooooobably hurry this up?” Valley Girl interrupted my stutters, quieting me with ease.

I sighed. There was no point in arguing this. I knew better with Daisy.

I asked Valley Girl what brought her in today.

“Oh!” Valley Girl said brightly, as if she had somehow forgotten and wasn’t sure how to answer. “Hee-hee! Murder!”

M-m-murder?!

“Yah!” Valley Girl continued, throwing a cute little nub into the air. “Not, like, my murder of course! Just, like, there’s been a murder.”

Goodness! Shouldn’t she have called the police before coming to me?!

“Oh, like, that’s just the thing!” Valley Girl said, waving around her little nub as she spoke. “The police totally know about it already.”

Sirens blared outside my window, Red and blue lights bled inside my office, flicking across the walls, the ceiling, the floor. My anxiety was picking up…

“Because, like, I totally escaped from jail!”

Oh goodness.

I heard boots stomping through the entryway on the floor below.

“Dude!!!” Daisy cried out, sitting back up. “Nice one, Girl! That is Awesome!” 

Valley Girl giggled and waved her nub at Daisy. She turned back to me and must have seen a look of horror on my face.

“Oh my god, relax! I didn’t do it!” Valley Girl said. “I’m just, like, the number one suspect is all! Like, convicted of the crime or whatever? IDK. But again, like, I didn’t do it.”

But… she did break out of jail…?

“Oh yah, I totally did that.” Valley Girl held her nub out bashfully and Daisy gave it a high-five. “Anyway, looks like they’re gonna, like, totally be lame and throw me back in there? Could you, like, prove I’m innocent?”

Wait, what?! But I know literally nothing about the murder! Or the case! Could I at least get some details?!

“FREEZE!” the N.D.P.D. (New Donk Police Department) screamed as they busted through the door, Ice Flowers at the ready. A Drybones and Toad in uniform kept their plants steady, aimed at Valley Girl. “You’re under arrest. Again!”

“Booooooooo!” Daisy shouted from her seat, giving them a thumbs down. “Boooooo!”

“Yah, well, looks like I totally can’t really do that?” Valley Girl said as a pair of handcuffs clinked around her nubs. “Think you could just like, IDK, figure it out or whatever? You’re, like, the detective?? Hello??”

Umm!! Uhh!! I�� I guess?!

“Cool! Like, thanks so much!” Valley Girl shouted as the police officers walked her out of my office.

My door flopped off the frame and onto the carpet with a thud!

“Door’s broken again, Luigi,” Daisy said, pointing at it like I couldn’t see it.

Thanks.

[alollinglaughingcat]

I posted 18 times in 2022

7 posts created (39%)

11 posts reblogged (61%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@stealmeawish

@leafpool-loves-ashfur

@atreyu-art

@firealder2005

@mumblesplash

I tagged 18 of my posts in 2022

#rb - 7 posts

#reblog - 7 posts

#burning thistles - 5 posts

#my art - 4 posts

#burning thistles au - 4 posts

#warrior cats - 4 posts

#warrior cats au - 3 posts

#random - 3 posts

#cats - 3 posts

#warriors - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 136 characters

#like yessss love ur evil girlfriend and her dad so much that they do good but only for you. everyone else can die but they'd protect you

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

From a Chinese Reader

Hello Lolling,

  My name is Tong. I am a Chinese reader of "Warriors". I love your "Burning Thistles" so much that I want to let all other Chinese readers read it!

  However, Many Chinese readers don't have the ability to visit foreign websites because of Chinese policies. Also, it is difficult for them to read English articles. Therefore, I would like to ask if you could allow me to repost and translate "Burning Thistles" on Lofter and Tieba, two of the most prominent Chinese websites where Chinese readers post fan fiction.  I will indicate the original author with the article. I'm look forward to receiving your early reply. Thank you!

Tong

-----------response-----------

of course you may @tongkitten !!! please make sure to credit myself AND @firealder2005 , my co-author, as well!!

8 notes - Posted May 12, 2022

#4

im too proud of this to NOT post it here dream smp songs and statistics babey

DSMP Songs Playlist Organized by Character Link

as of 8/12/2022, the playlist has 473 songs, ~443 of which are directly songs about or based on the Dream SMP and its characters/players

The characters with the most songs about them are as follows: #1 Wilbur: 85  #2 Tommy: 60 #3 Techno: 55 #4 Tubbo: 40 #5 Dream: 35 (+1 if including DreamXD) #6 Ranboo: 34 #7 Niki: 22 #8 Quackity: 22 #9 Karl: 21 #10 Philza: 20 (+2 if including Mumza)

(Niki is placed higher than Quackity on account of the unaccounted L’Manburg anthem/L’Manburg-based songs which indirectly or semi-directly include her)

The order and entire count for the DSMP songs is as follows: L'Manburg (27)  Miscellaneous Dream SMP (25) Sleepy Bois Incorporated (6) TommyInnit (22) Tommy & Wilbur Duets (8) Tommy & Dream Duets (4) Dream (23) Dream & Techno Duets (6) DreamXD (1*+1^) WilburSoot (L'Manbur (8) - Vilbur (18) - Ghostbur (20) - Revivebur (15)) (61) Technoblade (29) Techno & Tommy Duets (4) The Syndicate (6) Ranboo & Dream Duets (1) Ranboo (18) Ranboo & Tommy Duets (1) Ranboo & Tubbo Duets (5) Tubbo (21) Tubbo & Tommy Duets (7) Jschlatt (7) Schlatt & Wilbur Duets (3) Schlatt & Quackity Duets (1) Quackity (11) / Las Nevadas (4) (15) Quackity & Wilbur Duets (3) Charlie Slimecicle (3) Philza (10) / Mumza (2) (12) Karl Jacobs (15) Karlnapity (1) The Tales of the SMP (5)  CaptainPuffy (5) BadBoyHalo (2) / & Skeppy (2) (4*) The Eggpire (5) / Red Banquet (2) (7*) (**11) Awesamedude (6) / Sam Nook (1) (7) Eret (9) Niki Nihachu (13) Niki & Jack Duets (1)  Fundy (9)  GeorgeNotFound (13) George & Sapnap Duets (1) Sapnap (6) Sapnap & Tubbo Duets (1) Hannahxxrose (3) FoolishGamers (6) Purpled (2) Purpled & Punz Duets (1) Other Characters (Punz, Ponk, Jack Manifold, ConnorEatsPants, Aimsey, BoomerNA, etc.) (6) Musicals (4) / Albums (2) (6) Origins SMP (4) Additional/Related Songs (MCC, Manhunt, Lovejoy, GNF OF, etc.) (26)

31 notes - Posted August 12, 2022

#3

fuck you *warrior cat-ifies ur gay lego monkies*

i dont know why they were so easy to turn into warrior cats. truly it should not have been this easy. and yet... i already have an entire fucking plotline in my brain, ugh

blame this line: “Have you been running around with OTHER MENTORS?!” (vid linked)

yep! it’s Lego Monkie Kid but as Warrior Cats! i feel like their warrior names are pretty self explanatory lmao (Monkey King + Sun Wukong; shadow monkey + Six-Eared Macaque). but wait, you scream, MKpaw???? thats not a warrior name!!!

simpletons. in this AU, the legendary clans are distant history, long forgotten tales told to kits. so then why do they have warrior names? because Wukong (Monkeysun) and Macaque (Shadowear) were both born into the clans, and remain one of the few survivors of it. MK is a kittypet (or stray cat) who is enraptured by the tales of clancats that his friend-slash-father-figure Tang tells him. said stories involve a certain “long-tailed cat” named Monkeysun, the warrior who “stole the stars” and “lived forever.”

yep! Monkeysun stole the stars. Literally. Because in LMK everything is literal. Well, literal-ish. By stars, I mean the powers of StarClan granting lives. That’s how Monkeysun gained immortality in this AU - instead of stealing peaches, wine, and pills, he broke the Moonpool and granted himself a million lives. of course, this meant leaders could no longer gain their nine lives, and, understandably, many cats were upset, so of course, using what power they had left, the leader of StarClan (the Jade Emperor) buried Monkeypaw (he was an apprentice at the time) underneath the earth, in the tunnels, where he would roam and starve forever until all of his lives were gone.

course, that didnt happen, and Monkeypaw was freed to journey alongside the monk Tripitaki, who would be like a guardian cat or Sisters equivalent I suppose, and he and the other gang would partake in a journey to the west/sundrown place to find Buddha (a Rock or Midnight equivalent figure). why do the take the journey in this AU? honestly idk lmao.

anyway! what about Shadowear?? well, Monkeysun (who earns that name from Tripitaki) kills him when Shadowear attempts to kill Tripitaki, but! Even tho the power of the stars are gone, the Dark Forest still lurks, and the Lady Bone Demon (prob called Bonestar, formerly Bonelily or smthn) uses her powers to give Shadowear a life, resurrecting him, so long as he follows her rules...

similarly, the Mayor is able to possess cats like Ashfur, and wants to grant the power to his Lady but he needs to free her first, which is Shadowear’s purpose (it’ll have something to do with the Moonpool probably)

so flash forward to the present and MK finds Monkeysun’s stick (bcus of COURSE its a stick in this au lmao) and becomes his apprentice, training in the way of the warriors. Mei, ofc, joins him, and Pigsy is against it, while Tang is in awe. And Sandy’s supportive but wary with his own dark history (coughgangcatcoughBloodClancough). also yep Pigsy, Tang, and Sandy are still reincarnations, and Mei has the “dragon” ancestry still (the Samadhi fire stuff i dont have figured out yet, though it might be some magic Moonpool stuff instead maybe - oh also Nezha is the guardian of the Moonpool now, and maybe Chang’e is the guardian of the Moonstone? and DBK lives in the mountains and therefore guards the Tribe’s magic cave thing?)

also here’s some warrior names that wouldnt technically be canon to this au:

Pigsy -> Pigflower (why flower? because he cooks, and flowers are like herbs)

Pigsy’s first life/Zhu Bajie -> Boarbelly (bcus he eats people)

Sandy -> Bluesand (do i need to explain this one? not sure what JTTW Sandy/Sha Wujing’s name would be tho)

Tang -> Goldenshine or Brightshine or similar (once again not sure what his OG/Tripitaki’s name would be - maybe Goldensun to parallel Monkeysun?)

Mei -> Dragonblaze (”but Dragon isn’t-” FINE, Lizardblaze)

Ao Lie/White Horse Dragon -> ...Whitehorse? or Whiteflash

Demon Bull King -> Bullfang

Princess Iron Fan -> Windstorm, Windstream, Windbreeze, Breezestorm, etc.

Red Son -> Redflame

Nezha -> Ringfire, Lotusfire or Lotusheart

34 notes - Posted July 8, 2022

#2

See the full post

46 notes - Posted February 7, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

i fucking love Terry and i will fistfight anyone who looks at him mean

465 notes - Posted November 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[vivisviolets]

First of all I want to say that I can literally see how gifted and talented you are, you guessed many of our placements even to the point that I was shocked 😅 Also, you guessed that I have a young guide/s omg I got that in a lot of Pacs 👏😯

Now, there's nothing wrong with the way you read cards but tbh that's not I wanted to hear, indeed. I am tired of my guides playing with my feels sending me signs and then this ? and I do not want to be "besties" with someone that does not respect my dream and mentally 'destroying' me and because of that I go backwards instead of forward. And you know what? before I read your reading they sent me tons of signs about my desired person the one with "not good" energy and very explicit ones at once, so not my fault that they're literally pushing me into his arms and they're succeeding in it because my soul is literally craving for him. As for my future partner, it sounds very nice and what I got in pick a card too, but if my guides truly know me they would know that I cannot accept someone that loves cats because my father literally hates them and I care a lot about my father. Plus I'm into men that love dogs, since I was a kid they complete me tbh. So, my guides actually don't care about me even if they think to do things for me, they do not and I can imagine them laughing. If they know me, they should know that I'm going to refuse any man coming to me but my current desired person or else he won't be my desired person, even if I don't ask for a "forever" and I do not think he has bad intentions, intuitively I feel that he's so kind and plus he's at a big age that he doesn't play games.

Sorry if this sounds harsh or like a rant, but it doesn't take anything from your talent and how much you're gifted!!! Don't worry about the delay, you did a great job and you're the cutest and most talented reader I've ever encountered!! 💗

ok wow TEA 🍵 THAT IS TEAAA🍵 honeyyy

listen i read and hear out what spirit is telling me, but there are ALWAYS themes of me interpreting what i get told, through my own *experiences*- and honey do i KNOW how our spirit guides can feel like they are f@ ckin with us 😭😭🌹- like they wanted my hopes sky high and then it turned out to be a karmic- loll but thats in the past and was meant to happen- umANYWAYS- listennnn whatever you feel to be what your truth is, go after it. ok? shine onnnn 🌟. and if you were able to find the signs and messages that *you* needed from my reading then fantastic!! (maybe i was reading and picking up messages from your desired person instead of some other future partner- maybe??👀👀maybe) and don't even worry about that i adore feedback. and THANK YOU SO MUCH i am uuugghhghggughguhgugh so flattered ugh thank you ughh💕💗💗💗💗. go off with your bad self we love you for it ✨

[sammyluvr]

yes yes you can tag me as ♡ anon 🥺🥺

ohmygod i love henna so much but im allergic (i still apply it for some festivals)

i am excited to read all of the fics.i miss sam so much

and ily more, yapping you is actually helping my mental health a little

hope you have a kickass week at uni.

♡

ugh henna is the prettiest that's so unfortunate that you're allergic to it omg T_T

ugh i'm actively writing sam fics and i miss him too LOLL but i hope you'll enjoy everything when you get the chance to read them!!

ahhh i'm so very glad to hear that my love <33 you can yap to me about anything at all any time my sweets <333 thank you!! i hope your weeks goes as beautifully as it can, you got this!! <3

[discotenny]

Ohhh I wish you luck with your assignments 💗💗💗

I thought it was just a little cold but I am amazed by the power!!! I have been blowing my nose for 8 hours and it is still going 🥲

another moment of being a little mad Jakurai is not making himself real right now I want to be pampered until this is over 😮‍💨💕

Thank you as alwags for your kind words 💗 I look forward to reading your next works as usual!

Aaa I understand the struggle anon ;_;

Whenever I get sick I push through the early days so I can still feel productive then I’m hit like a truck and am stuck in bed for days 😭😭😭 make sure you don’t get a rash on your nose !! Blowing with tissues too much starts to get the skin dry and it hurts all the more TwT

I think Jakurai would be really good at taking care of you when you’re sick 🙈🙈🙈 Being a doctor and all LOLL. Id imagine he’d have some difficulty drawing the line between caring for you like a doctor would and caring for you like a boyfriend would- but pulling him down and giving him a big old smooch on the cheek will fix his attitude right smh smh.

With all that doctor money he’d probably be able to buy the good tissues- the ones with the lotion built in 🫣🫣🫣. His hands r probably so gentle too like can you imagine anon ugh !!! He’d be so soft and treat you more soft that he usually already does :(((. Maybe he doesn’t have time to cook at home but he definitely makes the time to cook you a warm meal that’ll be sure to have you feeling better in no time !! (Or he just asks Hifu to make something and he picks it up ehe)

Thank you for your compliments anon >,< I hope whatever I have in store lives up to it ehehe. Feel better once again !!

[pierofilm]

O.M.G. YUAN YUAN! 😚 i was blushing so hard when i was reading all the asks! 🤭 to answer ur question, i kinda want 2000's ish clothes? very feminine and possibly whimsical-goth style? that would be cool ! 😋

also yuan i am so so so annoyed that tumblr does stuff like that. 😒onetime i edited on tumblr and it did the same thing it did to u! i was so mad! and my fic was only 2K so i cant even begin to understand how ure feeling. take breaks and release it whenever you feel comfortable, we are here 4 u! <3🥰🥰🥰

ANYWAY thank u so much for the compliments on the poem, i cried too! 🥹i am just blushing so hard and so thankful that you and other annonies enjoyed it LOLOL. it's my favorite piece ever! i even made my teacher cry when he read it LOLL. 🤭 

im so happy that i get to be the "intellectual backbone" of this family HAHA.😤😁💪 i will share some of my brain cells w u guys :> lets all be smart together LOL 🩷

wishing u da best!

-🧠 ANAWN!

OMG WOW- feminine and whimsical-goth style?? I LOVE IT!! i wish i could see u wearing it hehe- but nvm cuz I CAN JUST IMAGINE IT <3 YOU DAMN WELL GONNA LOOK SO GORGEOUS IN IT I JUST KNEW IT :)) also ngl this is giving me extra ideas hehe.

AND NO TUMBLR IS BULLYING U TOO?? >:(( 'ONLY'?? DONT SAY THAT. 2K IS ALOT OF HARDWORK NO EXCUSE, IM SO SORRY THAT HAPPENS TO U TOO KEZ 😭😭 it just there's nothing we can do but to keep trying and to copy it constantly so u won't lose it. tho it takes alot of effort. i am so much in pain for your 2k fic </3 they're still a whole precious gem ..

and about the poem!! you so fr deserved it, you deserve every compliments, praises, and tears <333 even a millionth rereads aren't enough cuz i have to understand them better. reading them r just so ugh, so damn fascinating 😭😭 AND YES HAHA LETS ALL BE SMART TOGETHER <3 BRAIN SOUP TEAM 😭😭

[roosterbruiser]

just read the new chapter of VV!! I loved it! The angst ugh I could cry. honestly I’m personally not the biggest fan of jake (love him but this version hurts my heart sm) the way he’s unintentionally sort of leading cherry down a certain path even though it’s sort of inevitable and as we all know she makes her own choices brings out so many emotions in me. I love rooster and the relationship he has with cherry. You write them so beautifully. I’m so excited to see where this goes and I PRAY that all ends well and roosters endgame. Love this story sm your writing is so special. 🫶🏻💕 P.S as I was reading on A03 I kept tapping it to like it thinking it was tumblr loll can’t wait till you get your blog back to normal!

thank you so much for reading!! and thank you for sharing your thoughts!!

totally understand not being the biggest fan of Jake rn!! I am definitely making him a nuanced character!!

Cherry and Rooster might be my favorite couple I've ever written....there's just something so sexy and sad about them. DELICIOUS!! Cherry and Rooster ARE endgame!!

also I do that all the time with AO3!! I can't thank you enough for being flexible and switching platforms during my trying time in horny jail!! this ask is SO sweet and I can't thank you enough!!

[zepskies]

LOL yeah I figured that gif would be a bit of a fake out, but still applicable. 🤣🤣

But I'm so glad you could hear Ames' voice in your head when you were reading that line!! I did my best to get his cadence right as well.

Also, poor Alec, finding out the news she was planning to tell him this way. I love how you have Alec, Max, Logan, and Joshua working together to find her.

Ugh I know, so heartbreaking, right? 😭😭 I'm glad though that you liked how the crew got brought in to save her!

Logan eventually calls Alec to tell him about a lab within a mile of the scheduled rendezvous point.

Good old Logan, he always comes through for them!

I liked being able to get Logan in the story here and there! He really comes through in a pinch loll.

Great, comes Alec’s sardonic thought. Hopefully the ghosts of whoever was tortured here won’t cause them any problems.

Ah, a little supernatural Easter egg... I love it!

Hahaa thank you for picking up my breadcrumbs!! I hoped someone would catch that. 😂

Alec is especially brutal and efficient with the federal security guards. Max watches him out of the corner of her eye, but she doesn’t yet warn him to pull his punches. The stakes are high, and she understands his anger and stress.

Just as I imagine, he would be in a situation like this, like the glimpses of this we got in The Berrisford Agenda. It's also very Max-like to be watching ready to step in and pull him back if she needed to.

Yes that's exactly what I was going for! I thought he would act much in the same way as he did in the Berrisford house while looking for Rachel, but perhaps even more so here, considering the stakes. And I thought that would be on brand for Max too, supportive but watching him closely.

I'm so pleased Joshua went with them because I know he would want to help Alec, and he would be especially motivated to do so if he knew Ames White was threatening 'Alecs mate'.

Absolutely on both fronts!! That's exactly why I wanted to include Joshua in this part. 🥺

“You go. Find her. Leave him with me,” Joshua says. His blue eyes are sharp with predatory anger at the man who killed Annie Fisher.

White is in serious trouble here. Joshua’s about to get his revenge for Annie! Part of me really wanted him to get it in the big showdown in 'Freak Nation' although I completely understood why Max stopped him. I felt so bad for Joshua after White did that to Annie, so it seems fitting that Joshua got to take him out, and Max protected him (and the other transgenics) by hiding the fact.

He really is!! Oh my God I feel the same way about the S2 finale. I think it made sense for the story to keep Ames alive in that scene, like you said, but I think it was also because they were holding out hope for a season 3. 🙃 (I gotta find those books that apparently continue from where the show left off.)

“Alec,” is all you manage to say. You still have some trouble moving your heavy body, but you grab a fistful of his shirt and wince as you pull yourself up, just enough to bury your face into his chest. Your body shakes with the force of your sobs. 

Clinging to him... perfect! All the looks the others all share as well really helped create the atmosphere... felt like I could have been watching a scene from the show.

Aww thank you for shouting that out! Even though Alec and the reader are the focal point in the scene, I think during the scene it's important to shade in what's happening around them, like how you would watch it on a screen. It helps me visualize it as a writer, and hopefully you as a reader. 💜

Her reaction to the news that her boyfriend and friend are really transgenics was a relief, I was a little worried earlier on how she would take that news. It felt realistic, though, and because she knew them, even though it was a bit of a shock, she was ok with it. And she met Joshua!! I love Joshua ❤️

I love him too!! He's such a great character. And I think it's understandable for her to be shocked lol (especially with Joshua), but she cares about Alec -- and Max -- too much to let it deter her (and maybe deep down, she already knew he was different somehow).

Also, I'm so glad Joshua sounded and felt authentic! I tried my best to get his voice right as well. I rewatched a few episodes to try and figure out how to write his voice. He can be very simplistic at times, but also poignant in others.

I also really enjoyed how their thoughts...

Whatever you are, you're mine.

You’re mine, instinct tells him. And this time, he just can’t fight it. 

Mirror each other (and Alec has had this realisation).

This is one of the many reasons why I enjoy hearing from you! Thank you for shouting this out, as it was intentional. 💓💓

You gasp, laughing, and you shove against his chest. You twist away from the cage of his arms, but he laughs and doesn’t let you so easily escape. You realize then how truly strong he is when he rolls you under him on the bed. 

Oh yes, there is some serious strength there, and also, what a position to be manhandled into 😉

Lmaooo ikr?? Oh what I would give...

Their talk 😍😍

“But I’m not letting you do this alone. I… I love you,” he admits. “Sorry it took me so long to figure it out.”

I just love this ❤️

Thank you, friend!! I really loved writing that end scene. I'm a sucker for a nice fluffy ending, and it felt like some nice closure for his character as well -- being able to be honest and vulnerable with someone he loves.

I have thoroughly enjoyed this series. Thank you, friend, for this fantastic Alec story 😘

I'm so very glad to hear that!! It's been a pleasure to write this little series. I was hooked by the character and this world pretty much immediately, so it was very fun to explore him in Being Human. 😘💞💞

Being Human - Part 4 (Finale)

Pairing: Alec McDowell x F. Reader

Summary: Your life made sense before Alec slipped his way in. He unravels your threads without even trying. He frustrates you as easily as he weasels back into your good graces. But you soon realize that this man is worth the challenge.

AN: (I decided to release this a bit early.) Here we are, friends! The final chapter...

Chapter Summary: Ames White captures you, forcing Alec to his knees.

Word Count: 4,300

Tags/Warnings: Peril and violence, angst, major hurt/comfort, but also major fluff...

💜 Series Masterlist

Part 4: Reckoning

Terminal City is a region on the edge of the city. The chemical and biohazardous waste that was dumped there after the Pulse makes ordinary humans sick, but for the immune transgenics, it’s the perfect spot to carve out a sanctuary.

Alec has been visiting the sector frequently, working with Max, Joshua, and other Manticore escapees to build up its infrastructure. Joshua lives here full-time now, as it’s safer for the half-canine transgenic and others like him, who don’t “look” human.

Today, Alec’s working with Mole and Joshua on ammunitions. Regardless of what any of them look like, they are all soldiers, in one way or another built and trained for warfare.

As much as Alec doesn’t want to see it, the tensions between “ordinaries” and transgenics are mounting, especially in Seattle. 

He checks his watch and realizes that he’s late to meet you. 

“Shit. I gotta go,” he says.

“Where’re you going?” Max asks. She has a perceptive eye, but Alec doesn’t reveal anything.  He revs up his motorcycle and dons his helmet.

“Just going to meet someone,” he says, purposely vague. He doesn’t want another lecture from her. 

The truth is, he’s dreading this. He knows when he sees you, it’ll be damn near impossible to maintain his distance. He should’ve just met you at your apartment, but surrounded by your things, your familiar scent etched into every fiber of your place…it would buckle his resolve. 

So he heads back on his motorcycle all the way home. 

Something’s off.

He instinctively knows after he climbs up the stairs to his apartment. He tests the door, and it opens without him having to unlock it.

You would know better than to leave the door open.

He pushes inside the apartment, and he’s greeted to a scene that drops his heart into his stomach. 

His apartment is empty, but a table near the kitchen is knocked over. Glass liters the ground where it’s overturned, and on further inspection, he finds drying bloodstains on the glass and on the floor.

His heart beats faster as he takes in everything with wide eyes. He doesn’t smell gunpowder, or find anything else that would tell him what happened here. 

He does find your purse, tossed by the couch in the living room. 

Alec whips out his phone and calls your cell.

“Hello, 494.” A man’s voice—one that Alec would know anywhere. It prickles his skin with unease and makes his blood boil all at once.

“Ames White.” Alec’s teeth grind. “What game are you playing now?”

“This isn’t a game. It’s business,” White claims. “I have something you want. How much are you willing to pay to make sure she stays alive?”

Alec forces himself to calm down, even though his pulse is racing.

“What do you want?”

“You. And 452. With no bullshit on your end,” the agent replies. “Or this girl is going to pay that price for you.”

Alec’s breath becomes unsteady. “And if I comply, you’ll let her go. I’m supposed to believe that?”

“Oh, I won’t lie to you. She’s on her way to the lab as we speak. You see, they’re gonna want to analyze that abomination she’s carrying,” White says. 

That steals the breath from Alec’s lungs.

His eyes grow wide as he puts together what the man is saying. 

“But if you do comply,” he says, “I’ll make sure they let her deliver to term, at least.”

Alec’s throat tightens. Oh, God… 

“You let her go, you son of a bitch!” he grinds out. His white-knuckle grip pops a few springs in the couch. He releases it and covers his face, pressing hard between his eyes. “She’s not part of this!” 

“It seems she is, 494. I’ll send you the time and the place. Be there with 452.”

The line clicks. Alec’s breathing is harsh. He grips his phone so hard it nearly shatters, but he tosses it onto the couch and pushes his palms against the burn in his eyes. His jaw locks with the strain of clenched teeth. No, no, no, NO! 

His phone chimes with a voicemail message. Alec grabs the phone and listens. It details coordinates and a meeting time: tonight, at midnight.

Alec makes another call with what remains of his phone.

“Max,” he says shakily. “I need your help.”  

Alec barely resists pacing throughout Logan’s apartment while the latter types away, researching the coordinates Ames White provided for the meeting point. Their forced surrender. 

Max perches on the corner of the couch with her arms crossed. She’s concerned for you as well, but she gazes at him with sympathy.

“We’ll find her, Alec,” she says. 

Alec shakes his head.

“He could have her anywhere,” he gestures widely. “He could’ve already handed her off to whatever shady government agency he works for. Or with that damn cult, that in case you’ve forgotten, hates us. Like everyone else in this city.”

“Not everyone,” Max reminds him pointedly. 

“Yeah, and look where we are now,” Alec retorts. “I told you this would happen!”

“Do you want to be right, or do you want to save her?” Max shoots back. “Now think. We’ve found bases of White’s operations before. Both for the agency, and the breeding cult.”

“I’m cross-referencing old locations,” Logan says. He’s been typing away at his computer for several minutes. “I can ask Asha and her people to join the search. And I can do an Eyes Only broadcast, encourage people to keep an eye out.” 

Alec nods, but any outcomes of those plans will take time. Time you might not have. 

They’ve been following anonymous tips for hours. Joshua and a few X5s and X6s joined the search for Ames White, and more importantly, for you. 

Alec and Max have been working together without stopping even for a breath throughout the night. They only have one hour before they’re meant to be at the agreed meeting point: an abandoned building near the edge of the city. No doubt for their easy extraction. 

Logan eventually calls Alec to tell him about a lab within a mile of the scheduled rendezvous point. There have been reports of late-night transports—locals calling in about strange noises, and in one case, what someone thought was a muffled gunshot.

Alec and Max agree to check it out, but they’re going to cut it close with the meeting time.

“Josh. Where are you, buddy?” Alec asks after calling his friend’s cell.

“I’m here.”

“Where’s here?”

“Here,” Joshua replies. He’s turned the corner and found his friends on the crossing of Avalon St. and Broadway, via his elite sense of smell.

“Good,” Alec smiles in relief. He pats his taller friend’s arm. “You’ve been a big help so far, but I need you for this. Wanna be part of the rescue party?”

“Yes,” Joshua nods, but his tone suggests he’s offended that Alec has to ask. “Help save your mate.”

Alec’s smile weakens. He doubts you’ll ever want to be that with him, ever again. But he’ll be damned if the government, or some damn breeding cult, is going to lay a hand on you.

Logan agrees to meet them there in his van for backup, while Josh hitches a ride on the back of Alec’s motorcycle. The three of them haul ass to the location of the suspected lab.

They approach a large, three-story dilapidated building. According to Logan, it used to be a mental health asylum. When the government bought it out, the facility was turned into a private lab.

Great, comes Alec’s sardonic thought. Hopefully the ghosts of whoever was tortured here won’t cause them any problems.

He and Max communicate silently through the militaristic hand motions they learned in their training to scope the place’s security, its entry points, and the best way for them to infiltrate the building. Although Manticore made Joshua, he hasn’t gone through the same training as most transgenics have.

He’s fortunate for it, but it means that Max has to direct him more carefully. He covers her and Alec as they approach the back entrance, which seems to be where they most often transport both cargo and people. Right now, there’s a large van waiting on standby.

Alec rips out the driver first, while Max and Joshua take on the other guards who start shooting. Alec comes around the back of the van, and when the first guard opens the back door, Alec tears the gun out of his hands and yanks him out. Alec uses the man’s body like a Kevlar vest as his two companies unload a clip or two. He punches them both out hard enough to hear the crack of bone.

The van inside is empty, but he sees a cot and several machines already ready and waiting to transport someone. He grits his teeth and slams the door shut on his way out.  

“She’s not in there,” he tells Max. “If she’s here, she’s gotta be inside.”

Max and Joshua have taken out the outside guards, no problem, but he’s sure there’ll be more where that came from.

The three of them enter the building and race through the long hallways, slipping by lab technicians, doctors, and other staff. Anyone who attempts to stop them soon regrets it.

Alec is especially brutal and efficient with the federal security guards. Max watches him out of the corner of her eye, but she doesn’t yet warn him to pull his punches. The stakes are high, and she understands his anger and stress.

“There’s a file room,” Alec points to a door that’s labeled: RECORDS.

“I doubt they’ll have a file on her yet, especially if White’s trying to keep this under wraps,” Max says.

Joshua looks around and points across the hall. “Cameras?”

The other two look in the direction he’s pointing to, and they see what he sees—a room labeled: SECURITY.

Alec slaps a companionable hand on Joshua’s back, and they head for the security room. The guards are dealt with swiftly, being knocked out and piled against the back wall. While Joshua keeps a lookout, Max and Alec scan the many different camera feeds: focused on various hallways and lab subjects.

Alec scans each of them rapidly. He’s always been good with TV.

He finds you on one of the camera feeds and he points to it. “There she is! Room 204.”

You’re in a small, cell-like room, sleeping on what almost looks like a hospital bed. Except there’s a breathing mask held over your face, probably keeping you unconscious, and you’re attached to several monitors. It makes his heart sink and his spine tighten with rage, simultaneously.

“Let’s go,” Max says, but it’s not necessary. Alec is already halfway out the door.

They’re stopped at a four-way crossroads in the hall. In the center is Ames White.

“You’re smart, I’ll give you that,” he grants with an incline of his head. He takes a radio clipped to his belt and clicks it on, speaking into it. “Transport the girl. Make sure she’s sedated.”

Alec seethes. Before he can sprint headlong into a fight, Joshua stops him. Alec looks up at him in askance.

“You go. Find her. Leave him with me,” Joshua says. His blue eyes are sharp with predatory anger at the man who killed Annie Fisher.

Alec softens a fraction and nods in understanding. He shoots Max a look.

“Go, I’ll catch up with you,” she says.

Alec nods and races on ahead. He dodges bullets with the help of superior speed and crashes into each guard, taking them out with brutal force. He steals a gun off of one of them, and that saves him a lot of time and energy. He tries not to kill anyone, but he can’t think about holding back. He just needs to get to you.

He reaches the second floor, and finally to Room 204.

Two men are already in the room. He doesn’t want to open fire—the room is too small, the risk of ricochet too high. He grabs a knife from his belt and hurls it at the first man, who was poised to inject something into your arm. The second guard turns with his gun, but Alec is already moving too fast for human eyes to follow.

He breaks the man’s arm, followed by a swift uppercut. He takes the gun and hurls the man into the far wall, knocking him clean out as he slumps to the floor.

Alec breathes hard in the aftermath, but he begins to soften after his attention turns to you. He sets down the gun and takes in the sight of you, still dressed in jeans and a blood-stained shirt.

You’re heavily sedated and restrained by your wrists and ankles. You have a bandage wrapped around your forearm, along with brain and heart monitors attached to your forehead and chest, and an IV drip in your other arm. 

Alec takes a breath, and he starts with the wires, removing the small suction cups from your body and disconnecting all the monitors. He takes off the mask and unclips the leather restraints. 

The fury builds back up inside him at what they’ve already done to you. He doesn’t want to think any more on what they’d planned to do.

You must’ve been terrified, he thinks. He touches your cheek tenderly. His free hand hesitates, before it rests gently on your belly. He calls your name. 

You don’t stir just yet. Your body is still under the effects of the sedation. So he carefully lifts you into his arms. He hears Max approach, and she’s there in the doorway by the time he turns around. 

“Let’s go,” Alec says. His face is hard and angry while he carries you out. 

They regroup with Joshua in the lobby, though even Alec stops short when he sees the carnage. Ames White’s body lays on the floor with unseeing eyes. His throat is torn out. 

Joshua has blood in his teeth. He wipes at his face with the back of his arm, his eyes veering away from Max and Alec. Max blinks through her shock and tries to keep her mouth from falling open.

“Time to go,” Joshua says. His voice is heavy, but matter of fact.

“We’ll need to take his body, get rid of it later,” Max says, when she recovers. “We can’t let the police find him.”

They’ll blame us, is understood by them all. The police won’t have the full story, but it won’t matter. Appearances are everything. 

Max finds a black body bag in a nearby storage closet and Joshua collects White, later hefting the full body bag over his shoulder.

They make their escape out the back of the building, where Logan is waiting with his van. Joshua deposits the body in the back, where he also climbs in. Max takes the front passenger seat while Alec carries you into the middle seat bed. 

Nothing else feels right but to hold you in his arms. To stroke your cheek and wait, both desperate for, and yet dreading the moment you’ll open your eyes. 

Because when you do, there’s a good chance that he’ll find your fear. Or worse. 

“She’s going to be okay,” Max says to him, quietly. She’s twisted towards him in her seat.

“Maybe physically,” Alec counters. “I don’t know, Max. How did being held up in a lab affect your mental health?” 

Her lips purse. “One step at a time, okay?”

Alec shakes his head and looks down at you. He tries to commit your peaceful face to memory, because he doubts that he’ll ever see it again after tonight. 

Slowly, you start to wake.

At first, all you see is shadows and shapes of someone looming over you. Unconsciously you whimper and push at whatever holds you down, but the hold is gentle, the voice soothing. 

“Shh, it’s okay. Sweetheart, it’s me,” he says. 

Your eyes clear and focus as you blink…though they soon flood with tears. Relief takes over your fear. You see his concerned, handsome face, and your lower lip trembles. 

“Alec,” is all you manage to say. You still have some trouble moving your heavy body, but you grab a fistful of his shirt and wince as you pull yourself up, just enough to bury your face into his chest. Your body shakes with the force of your sobs. 

Alec gathers you up against him and shushes you gently, even as his heart clenches. He soothes a hand over your hair and your back. 

“I’ve gotcha. It’s okay, you’re safe,” he says in your ear. He meets Max’s concerned gaze, then Joshua’s in the shrouded end of the car. Even Logan glances back through the rearview mirror as he drives. 

Alec tries to block them out and focus on you. He holds you and comforts you for as long as you let him.

Eventually, you pull away to look at his face. You still have tears in your eyes, but now, it’s with a hue of uncertainty. 

“The man…the agent who took me. He was looking for you,” you say. Your voice is weak and a bit coarse. You try to clear it.

Alec wishes he had some water for you.

“He’s gone. You don’t have to worry about him,” he says. 

You let out a shaky breath, but you meet his gaze. “He said that you’re not…Alec, are you…”

He sighs; he understands the question you’re trying to ask. 

“Yeah. Those freaks you hear people talking about on the news?” he says. “I’m one of ‘em.”

Your eyes widen as your breathing becomes more labored.

“I was made in a lab,” Alec confesses. “At Manticore, bred and trained to be a soldier.”

A transgenic.

Your hand falls away from his chest, and you take that in with an unblinking stare. He can see you trying to process all this.

You glance over at Max, who had been facing the front to give you and Alec the semblance of privacy. Feeling your gaze on her, she turns around and gives you a half-hearted smile. 

“Hey, girl,” she greets. “Glad you’re okay.”

“You’re like him too?” you ask. Max nods.

Suddenly, everything makes so much sense. Why she and Alec have always seemed to share history and bickered like siblings. Why Max was friendly, but never truly your family. Why Alec had been so much of a mystery to you. Why he’d broken your heart. 

“Joshua too,” says a deep voice from the back. 

You turn your head and gasp as your eyes fly open wide again. Alec gives his friend a look over your head, but he tries to reassure you with a warm hand on your lower back. He hopes you can’t see the dried blood on Joshua’s snout. 

Joshua breaks into a sheepish smile. 

“Sorry,” he says, gesturing to his wolf-like face. “Bit of dog in my cocktail.”

You shake your head slowly. Your mouth opens and closes, but you try your best to get through your shock (and a lance of fear). Your head tilts as you consider his kind, very human blue eyes.

“You, um, your name is Joshua?” you say at last.

“Yes, Joshua,” he nods. “Rescue party.”

You blink at that. “You…helped get me out of there?”

He nods again, with a smile that flashes a few canine pointed teeth. You rest a hand over your wildly beating heart. 

“Thank…you,” you manage. 

Joshua bobs his head. “No problem. Saved Alec’s mate.”

If possible, your eyes widen further at that one. You turn back to Alec with raised brows. He offers a wan smile and a nervous chuckle. You notice, however, that he hasn’t let go of you. You’re also still sitting across his lap. 

“This is what you were hiding from me,” you say, perhaps stating the obvious. Your heart clenches with pain. “Why you…”

He brushes his hand along your arm. 

“I was trying to protect you,” Alec says. His brows furrow as his green-eyed gaze veers away from your face, with shame. “But I failed, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. None of this was supposed to happen—”

Some instinct has you reaching out to sooth your hand along his cheek, stopping his lips with your thumb. You stare up into his eyes, and they’re no longer guarded or distant. They’re the eyes you remember. 

Whatever you are, you’re mine.

You lean up and press your lips to his.

After a beat, Alec’s eyes close, and he answers you in kind. His fingers sink into your knotted hair. You grip his shirt by the collar, and he wraps his arm securely around you. 

With each new kiss, you feel more relieved. You don’t realize you’re trembling until he clasps your shaking hand against his cheek, to steady you. 

Alec gives you one more searing kiss before he pulls you into his arms. It’s a hug you both need.

His eyes shut tight as he buries his face in your neck, inhaling your scent. His lips find the mark he’d left weeks ago on your skin. It’s faint by now, but it’s still there. He takes deep breaths to calm himself, and you rub his back through it. 

He realizes you’re comforting him now; a fact that makes him smile.

You’re mine, instinct tells him. And this time, he just can’t fight it. 

Logan houses you and Alec for the night (or the morning, since dawn breaks by the time you all get back). 

You’re exhausted, but you still force yourself to shower. You’ll have to remind yourself to thank Logan for the spare clothing, though you don’t bother with the sweatpants just opt for the large shirt as you roll into bed. 

Alec isn’t far behind after he takes a quick shower. You force yourself to stay awake, waiting for him to come out of the bathroom. His skin glistens when he eventually leaves the bathroom, and you watch him cross the bedroom with just a towel low on his hips. He shoots you a smile before he starts getting dressed.

“Logan says he’s help us find a new place to live,” he says. 

You slowly smile at that. “Us?”

“Well, you know, both of our apartments are compromised.”

“Yeah, I get that,” you reply. When he slides into bed next to you, you swim through the covers and inch closer to him. “I’m just glad it’s a together thing.”

Alec gives you an amused look, but there’s warmth in his eyes. He thumbs at your lower lip. Soon, his smile begins to fall.

“I didn’t want to get you caught up in this. In my crazy fucked up life,” he says. 

“I know,” you sigh. “But I’m in it now. I’m in this with you. You realize that, right?”

He nods, though he doesn’t think he deserves it. Or you, for that matter. 

He slips his arm around you, just the same. You rest your head against his shoulder and tap his chin. 

“Alec, I don’t care what you are,” you say. “Transgenic or not, you’re the man I’ve always known.”

He lets out a subtle breath at that, chuckling. 

“For better or worse, right?” he asks.

You smile. “I have something to tell you…though I’m pretty sure you already know.”

Despite a tremor of nerves, a slow grin spreads across his face. 

“Tell me anyway,” he says. “I love surprises where I know the answer.”

You giggle. “You sure about that?”

“Yes,” he nods with a smirk. “Just tell me, woman.”

Your hand drifts down to rest against his chest, and you tilt up your face so you can meet his dancing eyes. The fact that he seems genuine gives you enough courage to just…say it.

“Alec, I’m pregnant,” you tell him.

His smile grows.

“…Really?” he teases. “You sure it’s mine?”

You gasp, laughing, and you shove against his chest. You twist away from the cage of his arms, but he laughs and doesn’t let you so easily escape. You realize then how truly strong he is when he rolls you under him on the bed. 

He dips down and claims you with a kiss. He shakes his head, because he never thought this would be his life. His hand sneaks under the sheets to rest over your lower belly, through the shirt. In turn, you cover his hand. You bite your lip with slight anxiety.  

“You’re really okay with this?” you ask. “Even after everything we…this is a lot for us. Really soon.”

Alec gradually sobers, and he acknowledges that with a nod.

“Yeah,” he agrees. “Honestly, I didn’t see this coming.”

You have to laugh a little at that. His lips tug at the corners, but as he squeezes your hand back, he stares directly into your eyes.  

“But I’m not letting you do this alone. I… I love you,” he admits. “Sorry it took me so long to figure it out.”

Tears burn in your eyes, but only one finds its way down your cheek. You take in a tremulous breath and nod. 

“I love you too,” you reply. Though you can’t hide a different uncertainty when you look at him. “But if you leave me again…Alec, I can’t.”

He looks more vehement than you’ve ever seen him when he shakes his head, meeting your gaze. 

“That’s not happening. I promise,” he says. “You’re stuck with me, baby. So much that you might just get sick of me.”

You utter a laugh through your tears, and you nod in acceptance. Alec smiles and wipes your cheek dry before he gathers you tighter into his arms, and presses a kiss to your forehead. 

You relax against his chest with a sigh. His heartbeat thrums steadily under your cheek.

And you finally rest.

AN: And there we have it. 🥹 I truly hope you enjoyed Being Human.

I might come back to add bonus one-shots to this, if you guys are interested in seeing more of their story. 💜 But I hope you'll let me know what you think about how it all shook out here!

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[ptergwen]

tom or peter reading about the 5 love languages a person can have and throughout the day he tries and incorporate all of them but make it super obvious that readers can tell? if that makes sense 😭

to be loved, to be in love

w/c: 2,082

warnings: literally one swear

a/n: ugh this is such an adorable concept thank you for sending it in :,) i haven’t written for tom in a minute so i hope i did him justice ahhhh but without further ado enjoy my loves <3

-

tom is browsing his feed when he comes across an article about love languages. he’s familiar with some of them, but he admittedly doesn’t have much knowledge of the topic. interested in learning more, he decides to read through the article.

he starts to wonder which love language yours is as he reads. it’s important to him that you feel heard and appreciated in your relationship, and catering to it would be a way of doing that. with valentine’s day around the corner, he figures now is the perfect time to start.

he’s got a few ideas as to how he’ll go about it.

❥ acts of service

you wake to the smell of pancakes and a kiss on your cheek. cracking an eye open, you find tom knelt beside your shared bed. he sets a plate down on your night table, next to a mug of coffee made just the way you like it.

“what’s all this?” you wonder, a grin pulling at your lips. tom smiles back. “g’morning, darling. i made you a little breakfast in bed,” he explains. “hope you’re hungry, hm?” he pecks your lips, you giggling. “i am. thank you, baby. ‘s sweet of you,” you beam at him, now sitting up. tom hands you your coffee.

“you’re welcome, darling. enjoy it.”

you sip the drink he so graciously prepared for you, tom joining you on the bed. he adjusts the covers so they’re around your frame and loops an arm around your middle, fingers running up and down your side. you decide to trade your coffee for the pancakes.

“ooh, let me,” he offers, retrieving the plate from you to cut your food. you watch him do so with your eyes narrowed curiously. “alright, what’s going on? what’s the occasion?” you finally question. “occasion? what’re you on about, y/n?“ tom cocks his head to the side.

he returns your breakfast to you, ready to eat.

“it’s not every day chef holland is in the kitchen. you’re up to something,” you point out, shoving a forkful of pancake in your month nevertheless. “but i’ll allow it ‘cuz these are really good,” you speak between bites.

tom chuckles, using his thumb to wipe some syrup off your upper lip.

“yeah? you like them?” he takes note.

could acts of service be your love language?

“mhm,” you mumble and bite into another piece. “where have you been hiding these culinary skills of yours?” a smirk graces tom’s features, hand shooing at you playfully. “stop it, you’re making me blush,” he jokes. you poke one of his freckled cheeks. “seriously! you should try some,” you hold out your plate to him.

“no, no. you enjoy them,” tom repeats, patting your thigh gently. “i wanted do something nice for you.”

you lean over and capture his lips in a kiss that you each smile into. tom licks the taste of maple syrup off when you pull away, humming in satisfaction.

one down, four to go.

❥ words of affirmation

“hey, love,” tom announces his presence. he’s standing in the doorway of the room designated as both of your offices. “what’re you working on?”

your fingers fly fast across your keyboard, a lengthy document displayed on your laptop screen.

“english paper. i’m trying to get ahead on assignments so i have valentine’s free,” you clarify, frowning at tom from your desk. “uni is kicking my ass, tom.”

you look like you could use a pep talk.

tom comes to stand behind you. his hands settle on your shoulders, beginning to rub them soothingly.

“i know, love. you’re doing wonderfully, though,” tom coos. “just stick with it. you can bang this out in no time.”

he peppers a couple of kisses to the back of your neck while his fingers continue to relax your tense shoulders. your head lolls back against your chair, gaze shifting up to tom.

“you think so?” you flash your best puppy eyes. “for sure. you’re a stellar student, y/n/n. i’m so proud of you,” tom praises you, kissing the top of your head. “it’s not easy, what you’re doing here. i understand there’s a lot of pressure,” he acknowledges. you nod, your head heavy.

“i mean, i never even made it to university,” tom adds to lighten the mood. “give yourself some credit, won’t you?”

his sentiment earns a laugh from you, which he considers to be a success. perhaps words of affirmation do it for you instead.

“thanks, tom. you always know just what to say,” you sigh out, placing one of your hands atop his. you bring your connected hands to your lips and kiss the back of his. “i really needed that extra motivation.” tom interlocks his pinkie with yours, his signet ring brushing your skin. “anytime, darling. i’ve got you,” he assures you.

“well, i should probably get back to work,” you complain, grip on tom’s hand tightening. “will you keep me company?”

tom grins down at you.

“absolutely.”

❥ quality time

it’s later that day when you emerge from your office. tom ventured off to the kitchen a while ago to fix you a snack, which is where you find him. he’s humming softly as he rummages through the fridge.

he sneaks tessa a piece of cheese and scratches behind her ears while she devours it.

“there we are, tess. you like that, don’t you?”

her tail wags back and forth in response, you snickering at the encounter.

tom hears this and turns around to face you, brows raised. tessa trots over to you. you squat to the floor so you can pet her, stroking at her belly.

“i was just on my way back,” tom tells you with a box in hand. “i got these chocolates you like, if you fancy them.” you scrunch your nose when tessa begins to sniff your face, tom breathing out a laugh. “sounds good. i think i’m gonna take a break, by the way,” you announce.

“mm, you’ve earned it,” tom pads over to you and tessa. “been cooped up at that desk all day.”

you rest your head on his shoulder, tom snaking an arm around your waist.

he recalls reading about another love language that’s centered around one-on-one time with your partner. now, he has an opportunity to test that out.

“how about we go for a walk?” tom suggests. “the weather’s quite nice, and some fresh air would do you good.” a tired smile appears on your lips. “sure, that would be refreshing. let’s bring tess,” you agree. his lips press to the side of your head. “i’ll grab her leash. wait right here,” tom mumbles against you.

he’s such a god send.

you munch on the chocolates and give tess more pets while tom gathers her leash. he hooks it to her collar, then the two of you throw on your coats. you’re out the door soon after.

your arm is linked in tom’s as you stroll through your neighborhood, tessa leading you both. it’s not often you’re able to share moments like this one, with your busy lives to live. you’ve missed this.

“i appreciate how much you do for me, T,” you speak quietly, nuzzling your face in tom’s neck. “i really do. you’ve been so lovely to me today, and every day. can’t thank you enough.”

you two stop on the sidewalk, tessa wanting to explore a patch of grass. tom hugs you with the hand that isn’t holding her leash.

“aw, y/n/n. you don’t have to thank me. i love you so much, you know?” tom murmurs. “i know. i love you, T,” you peck a spot on his jawline.

you continue on your walk, staying close to tom’s side.

“so, tell me more about your paper,” tom prompts you. “how’s it coming along?”

❥ gifts

“darling? have you seen my ring?” tom calls from the bedroom. he’s searching random drawers, huffing and puffing. “whereabouts is it?” he mutters under his breath.

you’ve finished your english paper at last, so your schedule is cleared for the day. you come into the room to help tom look.

“did you check your finger?” you tease, tom dramatically rolling his eyes. “haha, very funny. but i’m serious. i’ve no clue where it’s gone,” he whines. you rub his back to comfort him. “the signet ring, right?” you wonder. “that’s the one,” tom confirms, closing the drawer he had been going through.

“not again. what happened to your vow to never take it off after last time?” you shake your head. “i have my reasons!” tom defends. “just, let me…”

the ring suddenly catches his eye. lo and behold, it’s on his pinkie where it normally resides.

“never mind,” tom wiggles his fingers to show you. “oh, you div!” you gasp, pushing at his back lightly. “what did you need it for, anyway?”

tom slips the signet ring off his pinkie, shooting you a wide grin.

“actually, i wanted you to have it,” he reveals, reaching for your hand. your eyes go wide. “wait, what?”

tom read that with gifts, they should convey thoughtfulness and gratitude for your partner. it’s only fitting he gives you his signet ring. it’s special to him, and so are you.

“yeah,” tom shrugs like it’s nothing, sliding the ring onto your pinkie now. you ogle at it, your hand in his. “tom, baby. i… i can’t,” you almost whisper. “of course you can, darling,” he insists. “why couldn’t you?”

“because it belongs to your family. you should keep it,” your eyebrows knit together. “it’s yours, tom.” he grabs your other hand, bringing both to his heart. “you are family, y/n/n. it’s yours, too,” he corrects you. “it would mean a lot to me if you had it. i really do want you to.”

you meet tom’s eyes to be sure. he nods, urging you on.

the gesture is so beyond kind of him, but so out of the blue.

“okay,” you concede with a small smile. “i’ll take good care of it.”

tom places a kiss to your forehead, an arm winding around you.

“never had a doubt in my mind you would.”

❥ touch

you and tom are snuggled on the couch for a rom com marathon to end the night, in honor of valentine’s day being soon.

he’s tried out every love language to see which you respond the most to, although you seemed to have responded to all of them. there’s only one more he hasn’t yet attempted; physical touch.

“love?” tom gets your attention. “hm?” you shift your gaze from the tv to him. he spreads his legs, doing grabby hands for you. “c’mere. wanna hold you,” he requests with a dopey smile.

you giggle and climb into his lap, legs straddling him. tom cuddles your waist, letting his hands travel under the hoodie you borrowed from him. his warm palms knead at the bare flesh of your lower back. you exhale as your eyes flutter closed.

“you’ve got quite a few knots down here, love,” tom observes. “does this hurt at all?” you curl your arms around his torso. “no, feels so much better. keep going,” you encourage him.

tom carefully massages your back and kisses both your cheeks, his thumbs caressing your hipbones simultaneously. you let out noises of content, burying your face in tom’s chest. your hand moves up to his bicep and squeezes.

the reflection of the tv glints from the signet ring on your pinkie, tom biting back a smile.

“i love you,” you say against his chest. “i love you, too,” tom breathes.

that’s when it clicks.

“guess this is the one, then,” he speaks to himself. “huh?” you pop your head up, squinting at him. “what’re you talking about?” tom’s hands still in their movements, his lips pursed. “your love language. it’s physical touch, i believe,” he elaborates.

“i guess it is,” you echo. your elbow rests on tom’s shoulder, chin propped in your hand. “since when do you know about love languages?” you scoff. “since today,” tom deadpans. “i’ve been trying to figure out which one yours is. now i know.”

“i knew you were up to something!” your mouth drops open. “that’s honestly really cute, though. you’re too good to me.” you kiss tom’s shoulder. he clicks his tongue, fully enveloping you in his embrace. “come on, you deserve it.”

you feel so at home in tom’s arms, relaxing into him. his fingers glide around to your back once again.

“where were we?”

[anapotatowriter]

The Flowering Quince - Part 2

Edmund Pevensie x Reader

A/N: PART 2! ASKDSFSA, I LIKE THIS ONE! And the next part will be our ball ;)

Summary: Edmund Pevensie and Y/N L/N have been enemies ever since they met. Can a bet set aside their differences?

Contains: Enemies to lovers, Battles, fighting, Playboy!Edmund, Golden Age AU... I don’t think anything else is there, but feel free to mention it if there are any more-

Requested: No

Edmund rolled his eyes at my comment as we walked into the room, frustrated at not being able to give me a retort. I snorted and said, "Yeah, keep rolling those eyes, and you might find a brain back there." It had been three days since I had started annoying Edmund, but the lack of replies to my sarcasm was quickly beginning to bore me. "Ugh, it's no fun to bother you unless you give me a reply back," I groaned as I free-fell onto his bed. "Believe me, it's no fun for me to listen to you and not be able to reply either. It physically pains me to hold back my sarcastic comments," groaned Edmund, crashing onto the couch in the room. "Wanna play some chess," asked Edmund, making me sigh and turn around to stuff my face into the bed. "Chess is so boring. I hate it and will never play it. Let's go practice some fighting instead?" "No," stated the boy bluntly. "What do we do then? Cause I am sticking around to bother you as much as possible," I said, placing my chin on my hand and facing the brunette king. "Why can't you just leave?" asked the boy, his head lolling back, eyes closed in aggravation. "Cause the week is gonna be over in 4 days, and I'm not losing this opportunity. I would be a fool to do that," I shrugged. "Come on then, let's go to the library," said Edmund, standing up and offering his hand to me. "Finally, a good suggestion! You pick out the books, I'll get the coffee," I said, taking his hand and standing up, brushing off my pants before going to the kitchens. During our time together, the two of us discovered 2 things we had in common. Our love for reading and black coffee. I finally found someone to talk to about all the books I read. Most of the soldiers I worked with spent too much time training to bother with activities like reading. However, the extra time I spent with Edmund led to us discovering some common ground between us. 

"The usual," I commanded as soon as I walked into the kitchen, taking up my persona of the Head Guard. Two cups of black coffee were ready five minutes later. I picked them up along with the chocolate chip cookies and walked out towards the library. "Here," said Edmund without looking up from his own book, holding out another book. "Thanks, here," I said, trading the book for the steaming cup of coffee. I started reading the lovely tale of a creature, called a Hobbit, which had to carry a ring to "Mount Doom." Soon, the coffee was over along with the biscuits, the only noise being the rustling of pages. That was before the doors of the library slammed open, making me stand up immediately to unsheathe my dagger from one of the scret pockets and point it at the imposter. "Oh, Susan! Sorry," I said when I recognized the young woman, sheathing my dagger again. "Why is it that whenever someone wields a weapon towards me, it's you?" joked Susan, making me give her a gentle smile. 

"Edmund wasn't being annoying for once," I said, pointing my thumb at Edmund, who looked up for a second before glancing back down at the pages. "Nice to see that you both are becoming friends," said Susan. I grimaced and said, "Ew, no, I despise him," just as Edmund said something similar about me. "Ok then... Anyway, Edmund, we need some help with Tashban," said Susan, turning to Edmund as I sat back down and picked up my book. Edmund turned towards me, a questioning looks in his eyes. "Oh, please, go. I wanna get rid of you anyway," I said, turning to the book. "Bye, weirdo," said Edmund as he stood up and left the library. "Bye, badger's ass," I replied, looking into the book again. "Hey Y/N," sighed Susan as she collapsed onto the chair Edmund had occupied a few hours earlier. "You know, you are royalty. You shouldn't be spending this much time with a guard," I said, flipping to the last page of the book. "Please, you are so much more... real... than all the other ladies of the court. I would choose to be with you over the royalty any day," said Susan, her fingers pinching the pinch of her nose in exhaustion. "Oh, also, I forgot to mention. We are holding the Summer's Ball in a month," said Susan. "Oh! Ok, I will be there to stand guard, and I'll start preparing the rest of the soldiers to protect you during the Ball. I'll also get the positions of the soldiers into place. It's been ages since we changed them," I started rambling, the protection of the royal family a priority in my mind as Head Guard.

"Y/N," said Susan, placing her hand on my arm and making me stop talking. "I mentioned it because I was hoping that you would join us at the Ball," she explained. "Ok? I kind of have to be there to protect the royal family," I shrugged, making plans in my mind. "Y/N, you misunderstand me. I want you to be there as a party goer and friend, not as a guard," clarified Susan, making my eyes widen. "But Susan, I don't dance," I exclaimed, immediately protesting her suggestion. "Nonsense, you danced so well with Peter on our coronation night!" "But that was a ball with only Narnians! Now, people from Calormen, Galma, Terebinthina, and even the Lone Islands will be coming! Specifically royalty," I protested, my hands moving around wildly."Y/N, you'll be coming as my guest, don't worry about it!" "What if people attack us during the ball, and I am too busy prancing around in a dress to protect you and your siblings?" I asked, getting more frazzled by the minute. "Y/N, I want to see you in a dress, first of all. You always wear pants and a tunic. Second of all, it's one night! What's the worst that could happen? Third of all, I, as your High Queen, command you to attend the Ball," cajoled Susan. "Fine, I guess! If the High Queen commands it," I mocked, standing up and bowing. "I'll go arrange the system of the guards during the Ball now," I said, waving goodbye and leaving.

In the morning, I walked to Edmund's chambers. I wanted to wake him up for our sword-fighting session. I saw one of the kitchen maids scurry out of the general area. I rolled my eyes at the deeds that the youngest King had been up to the night before. "Edmund, practice, ten minutes," I yelled through the door before going to the training field. As I walked to the training field, I stopped at the bush of Flowering Quince. I sighed softly, brushing my fingers through the petals, careful of the thorns. I plucked one of the flowers and brought it to my nose, breathing in the scent that reminded me of home. I dropped the flower and went to the training area, picking up my swords. I experimentally swung my swords around, the emerald hilts sparkling in the light from the rising sun. "Morning," I called as soon as I heard the distant sounds of footsteps. "How? I literally haven't even walked in," complained Edmund as he opened the door. "Battle trains you to see and hear everything and react accordingly," I shrugged, twirling my sords around in my hands. "Have you always been fighting?" he asked as he picked up his own swords. "Ever since I was... seven, I think," I replied as I got into a fighting stance. "That's very young... You were my age when we met, around 12, right?" he asked as he started fighting, his swords clashing against both of mine. "Yep," I responded as I swung my sword at his legs, which he blocked quickly. "Why did you start fighting so young?" he said as he struck his other sword towards my neck, which I easily dodged. "Stop talking and start fighting. Your stance is horrible," I commented, avoiding the question. Soon enough, the fighting session ended. "You still didn't answer my question," he huffed, swiping strands of his hair off of his face as he placed his swords back in their place. "It is none of your business, Edmund. Stop bothering with it," I said, not wanting to talk about it. "Fine... Sorry if I intruded," he said as he walked towards the door. "Library?" I asked as he stood at the door, making him turn, smile, and say, "7 in the evening. You bring the coffee."

I walked down the narrow corridor, my eyes squinting in the windowless path. My eyes were buried in the plans of the castle so that I could arrange the guards when I collided with someone. "Fucking hell," I muttered as the papers scattered everywhere. "Sorry, Y/N," muttered Peter as he helped me pick up the pages. "You didn't have to do that, Peter. You're the High King," I said as he handed me all the papers. "Nonsense, Y/N. You're my friend," he said, flashing me a smile. "Peter, I was wondering if we can have a meeting tomorrow regarding the plans for the Summer Ball. Guard wise, you know?" I asked. "Tomorrow at breakfast then," he said before smiling and walking away. 

At 7, I reached the library and worldlessly handed Edmund his coffee as he handed me another book. We read in complete silence, reading out a few choice chapters from our book every now and then. "Done," Edmund and I called out at the same time, placing our book down on the table in unison. "Good night Ed," I muttered as I walked towards the library door sleepily. "Ed, huh?" he asked, making me realize what I said. "Don't worry, I like it," he interrupted quickly. "You know, you're not as bad as I always thought," I said before leaving. "Neither are you," I heard his voice yell, making me giggle. Wait, why the fuck did I giggle- Whatever, I must just be very sleepy. 

"Good morning Susan, Peter, Lucy," I said, bowing to each one of them. "Please, no need for formalities, Y/N! We're friends," smiled Susan, pointing at a seat next to her. "So, regarding the Summer Ball, all the main entryways to the castle will be protected by at least 12 guards. The secret entrance will have two, so we don't attract any attention. Then there will be 24 guards in the ballroom if there is an ambush. All doors in the ballroom will also be guarded," I started as the three royal members ate breakfast. "Y/N, just please make sure that they don't look off-place with the decorations for the Ball," fretted Susan, who was in charge of the decor. "It's fine, Su, I'll handle it! Y/N needs to handle the protection of the people," said Lucy, making me smile gratefully at her. "Now, there will also be guards placed at the-," I was interrupted by the door to the dining room slamming open. "Do you guys wanna see a butterfly," yelled Edmund excitedly, panting. "Sure," said Lucy excitedly, eyes flickering around the room for the butterfly. "No Edmund-," Peter and Susan said in unison as Edmund picked up the brick of butter and threw it violently. "Ethereal," I said, hiding my laughter. "Thank you," said Edmund, leaving again. "Bye idiots and Y/N," he said as he left the room. "Bye Ed," I called out, chuckling a bit at his "butterfly." 

I missed Peter and Susan's confused glances at each other. "Now, as I was saying," I continued, explaining all the plans I had for the Ball. "Thank you, Y/N. It's nice knowing how hard you are working to protect us," said Peter when I finished. "It's my duty, Peter," I said, bowing my head a little. "And remember, you will need to wear a gown for the Ball," Susan said excitedly, making me shake my head wearily. "I would not be going, but you are forcing me. I need to be protecting you," I said agitatedly. "Please Y/N," whined Lucy, pouting a bit. "I don't really have a choice, do I, High Queen," I said, mock bowing as I got up. "You do not. Bye Y/N," said Susan, laughing at my resistance. "Bye," I said, leaving the room. 

"And done!" I exclaimed as I put the pizza in the oven. "Finally... let's clean up now," said Edmund, starting to gather all the ingredients that were still out. "I guess I'll stop bothering you from now on. It's our last day," I said, plastering a smile on my face. His face fell a bit as he nodded. "You're not half-bad, Y/N. I wouldn't mind reading some more with you in the library," said Edmund sincerely as he picked up the capsicum. My heart fluttered at his words, though I didn't understand why. Maybe I was excited about the pizza? "Shit," I laughed as flour flew into my face. "How did you even manage to do that, Y/N/N? Like, half the ingredients for our pizza or on you," said Edmund, a grin playing on his lips."Oh really? Really? Take that," I yelled, throwing flour at his face. "You did not just do that," laughed Edmund before throwing mushrooms at me. Soon, there were pizza ingredients all over us and the kitchen floors. "Oof," sighed Edmund when he ran out of food, plopping down onto the ground. "Tell me about it," I said, sitting down next to him. As we caught our breath, an odd smell filled the room. "Is something... burning?" I asked Edmund, who sat up and smelled the room. "THE PIZZA," we yelled in unison, running to the oven. When we opened it, smoke billowed out of there."What's happening," called out a voice through the dark smoke, making me squint and cough as Edmund put out the fire. "What the-," said another voice, which broke off into a coughing fit. As the smoke slowly cleared, I made out the faint silhouette of the last people I wanted to see. "Peter, Susan," I gulped, making Edmund turn around and freeze. "What... the... HELL HAPPENED IN HERE," shrieked Susan, making me wince. "We left our pizza in the oven," said Edmund, shrugging. "That bitch burnt as fuck," I continued, grimacing. 

"Go to bed," said Peter firmly, making Edmund and me glance at each other sadly.  "Good night Ed," I said sadly, brushing off some of the flour from my pants. "Good night Y/N/N," he said just as sadly, waving at me. "Tomorrow, library, 8 in the night," I said, and he nodded. My heart thrummed in my chest as I walked to my room. What was happening? Was I falling sick? I sighed, confused by these feelings. "Whatever," I sighed, changing and climbing into bed. 

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[embrassemoi]

Surrounded by the Moon and Stars ✷ 29

Pairings: Sirius B, F!Reader, Remus L Warnings: Language, angst, insecurities, blood, darkish thoughts (self-hatred), fighting, violence Author's Note: heavy chap. if you’re having a bad day, take a moment, be kind to yourself and put off reading this until you feel better 💜

【 Masterlist | Previous Chapter | Playlist 】

Chapter 29: That Pet You Just Couldn't Keep

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Remus woke up to a bright, white light. He squinted, head lolling to the side of his lumpy pillow. The chair near his bedside was empty, saved from a pitcher of water along with a few potions Madam Pomfrey must’ve left for him, were placed on the stand beside his bed.

Something wasn’t right. Peter or one of the other Marauders were always there waiting for him after his transformations.

Too hot for a blanket in June, he ripped off his covers and noticed the bumpy, large material hiding beneath his nightgown. He licked his lips, letting air whistle down his dry throat while a sharp, burning sensation flooded his abdomen. Remus winched, groaning out while stretching to drink the potions and water. Although, as he brought the glass vials to his lips, he noticed that his arm was littered with scratches and bruises. Curious, he lifted the slit of the gown to see a large wrapping across his lower stomach and bruises in the shape of lopsided circles and rectangles travelling across his body.

Remus felt his face scrunch. Ever since the Marauders had become animaguses, he hardly sustained any injuries aside from the occasional limp or flimsy scratch. There was usually an absence of pain nowadays, not an overload of it.

What caught his attention was the scent of human blood. His senses were always heightened the week leading up to the full moon and the week following, so it was particularly strong. It caused his head to spin like planets performing a celestial dance.

Preoccupied with the scent, Remus didn’t notice someone slipping into the room.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” A fuzzy Peter came into view. He went to sit on the edge of his bed sporting a nervous look.

“Was wondering where you were.” Remus relaxed at his appearance.

“Yeah… Erm — been busy.”

Soon enough, another sharp pain stabbed at his abdomen again. “Fuck — what happened last night?”

Wormtail sucked in sharply as he wiggled in his seat uncomfortably. “I… something terrible happened. Bollocks, Moons — I’m sorry...”

Remus felt his spine prickle with needles. “What?”

“We should wait until Dumbledore or James comes back.”

“Dumbledore?!”

Ghostly pale, Peter was on the verge of fainting. Remus took another deep inhale. This time, he smelt blood, but it was coming off of Peter and a few other foreign scents lingered on him. Was that… Y/N? And… Snape? Remus scanned Peter, noticing the droplet of red on his shoes.

“Pete,” his voice dropped to an icy whisper, “Whose blood is that?”

He remained quiet.

Remus moved to prop himself up on the bed. “What happened?”

As Peter spoke, every word made Remus recline into himself and he was left unsure of how to feel. The overload of information put him into a state of complete shock. His vision faded in and out, suddenly feeling very cold and dizzy compared to the hot weather.

He distantly heard Peter trying to gain his attention but stared blankly at the metal bed frame.

“Say something,” his friend tried, sounding desperate. He didn’t even know how long he’d been quiet for.

Remus worked through the betrayal in nine steps. It helped make sense of his emotions. To categorize them — making it easier to file away.

1. Shock & denial

“No,” he said, barely moving a muscle in his face. “That's impossible! Padfoot would never…”

Peter watched him pitifully. Remus’ eyes blinked rapidly, heart pounding. “I’m sorry.”

2. Process what happened (or try to)

“He… told… Snape?” He asked despite Peter repeating the story multiple times.

“Sirius was mad at Sniv — Snape, and he was provoked by —”

“I didn’t hurt him, did I? I didn’t hurt anyone?”

“He’s fine.”

“Then why won’t you tell me what happened to me? Why was I bleeding?”

He refused to look him in the eyes and Remus felt terror ebb it's way through his skin. “Answer me!”

“As I said, L/N and Snape got into a row… she heard Sirius tell him and she went to save him…”

“Don’t you dare lie to me.”

Wormtail took a deep breath. “You… nicked her a bit and James’ antler broke off in you because… he was trying to get you off of her…”

Remus was rooted in place. What Peter just said was unreal. His stomach twisted painfully. He blinked. “Y/N’s hurt? I hurt her?”

“Yes — no! That was Snape —” “Is she here? Did I bite her?”

“You didn’t and yeah but —” “Move out of my way.” He pushed himself up wobbly.

“You lot a lot of blood, sit —”

“Get out of my way!” He threatened. Remus pushed Peter to the side, clambered to his feet. Remus gripped the bed tightly and felt a few seams rip open and blood began to faintly seep through his white bandages.

He staggered around, ripping back the curtains until he saw Y/N. Limping up to her bed, Remus almost burst into tears when he saw her. She looked so tiny, curled up and engulfed in blankets and pillows. Her ankle was propped up, head bandage and skin dull.

It felt like Peter had poured a bucket of freezing cold water on him.

He hurt her. Almost got her and Snape killed or infected. Could have hurt Prongs and Wormtail…

He was a fucking monster.

He should be put down.

From how loud he was, running around the wing, Y/N’s eyes fluttered open. She attempted to stretch, groaning out in pain. But then, her eyes flickered up to him and she froze. Her hand shot up protectively to her chest and face as instinctively went for her wand but stopped. Genuine fear flashed through her, making Remus instantly want to cry. It felt like an eternity passed as she gripped her sheets and opened her mouth.

She was going to scream — to take him away — call him a monster — to cry or yell for Madam Pomfrey or —

But Y/N’s body relaxed. A tried smile twisted and gaze dissipated with fear, replaced with nothing but understanding and softness; she even went as far to touch his hand but Remus wrenched it back.

“Ta-da!” She croaked. “I lived.”

Remus didn’t smile, only staring horrified.

“Yeah, that was a hit or miss...” Peter interjected. He stood behind him, ensuring that if he fell, he’d be there to catch Remus. He continued to stare like she grew another set of eyes.

“What?” Her grin deflated. “Am I that irresistible?”

That pulled a breathy laugh from Remus as he shook his head. Why wasn’t she disgusted with him?

“Thank Merlin, you’re both awake.” All their heads turned to James’s floating head before he pulled off the invisibility cloak.

James moved to pull Remus into a large hug, whispering an ‘I’m sorry’ into his ear. He held him for a while before breaking off, going to embrace Y/N who wheezed.

“Ouch.”

“My bad, my bad!” He pulled back and slipped into bed with her. Peter forced Remus to sit on the edge of her bed while he stood.

A million thoughts ran through his head. He wanted to get away, to run — not even be in the same room as her. Remus wanted to think, to make any sense of what happened.

What the fuck happened? He couldn’t even process it.

She remembered everything, right? Surely she wouldn’t be this calm had she.

“Oh, wait — Lupin, are you alright? I swear a deer came at you last night.”

James chuckled out loud, breaking Remus out of his thoughts as he looked at him and Peter. “I guess there’s no point for secrets anymore.”

Y/N looked at them questioningly, her eyes squinting from the bright light before Peter went to close the blinds shut. James got off the bed, smiling widely at Remus and Peter got onto the bed instead.

“Ugh — Pete? James? What —”

A loud gasp ripped from her mouth as she jerked away from James who turned into a very large stag and Peter into a fat brown rat.

Remus could almost cry at how comical her face looked.

James was so large that he had to take a few steps back to prevent his antlers from poking one of their eyes out and Remus noticed that one was gone.

He felt sick again. A hand drifted to his stomach.

“Holy shit! Oh my god!” Y/N went to graze a finger on Peter’s fur before turning to James with shaky hands to touch one of his antlers and patting him on the head. She was speechless as her mouth open several times before forcing out, “You're really Bambi!”

James turned back, taking his glasses off to clean. “I wanted to be a lion — for Gryffindor, y’know.”

“You can’t choose, I wouldn’t be a rat.” Peter grimaced.

“They’re highly intelligent. Nothing to worry about.” James reassured and ruffled his hair.

“When did you guys learn to do this?”

“We’ve been at it for three years now. We finally were able to do it in August before school started.”

She shook her head, staring in awe.

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Dumbledore came to speak to everyone later that day.

Remus had been dreading it once he came into the wing and began speaking to Y/N, a buzzing sound filling his ear. All Remus was left to do was twiddle his thumbs, waiting and completely disoriented.

When he finally approached him, Dumbledore lost his usual twinkle in his eyes. He made sure to close the long vertical blinds and again, the room filled with a low buzzing sound.

“How are you doing?” He asked. Remus, had he been in the right mindset, would have prevented the scoff escaping him. Dumbledore didn’t react but continued. “Miss L/N is recovering well and Mr. Snape didn’t receive any injuries. Just a fright.”

Remus nodded, that was good, but he remained quiet.

“Snape’s been persuaded to act accordingly for the best interest of his fellow pupils and L/N gave her word.”

Remus choked back a laugh. Snape was going to, no matter what, let his secret slip somehow.

“You’re also exempt from the Transfiguration exams, both you and Miss L/N. You’ve both sustained a degree of varying head injuries and you’ll be graded on a cumulative from McGonagall.”

Dumbledore was forcing Remus to the edge as he bit down on his inner cheek. It was useless to listen to him. “Are you expelling me?”

“No. You should not bear any blame.”

“Dumbledore, no offence, but are you mental?” Remus sputtered adding, “I endangered four students last night.”

“Yes but —” “The next time we won’t be so lucky. I’m a monster, sir. I should be.”

The headmaster sighed. “Remus, give yourself a bit of credit. Think highly of yourself.”

Remus gave a dry laugh, almost baffled at how Dumbledore was acting. Did he just gloss over the fact he could have gotten students infected? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself had he. “How can I?”

“Well Y/N seemed to think very highly of you. She made you a very compelling case along with your friends, Potter, Pettigrew and Black.”

“Black’s not my friend,” Remus countered. He didn’t care about how rude he was being.

“Remus —”

“Is he expelled?”

“No.” The answer had Remus wheeling, anger spiking. “He’s not.”

“Why not? If it isn’t my fault, that I’m not to blame then why isn’t he? He told them how to find me.”

“I understand that this is a very difficult situation and rest assured, Sirius will be punished. I can promise you. But expulsion isn’t the answer.”

Remus refused to look at Dumbledore and he must've realized he was getting nowhere with him. He stood but before leaving, he gave a pitiful look.

“I have done terrible deeds, indulged in foolish pranks that I have lived to regret, but each has been a valuable learning experience. It’s a pity that it came to this. Learn in your heart to forgive, Remus. The world is already filled with too much hate.”

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June 16th, 1976

3. Sadness & pain

Remus had been avoiding the Marauder’s dorm. He’d gone as far as begging Madam Pomfrey (who’d taken pity because she knew what happened) to let him stay another two nights before getting kicked out. Remus always healed physically faster and his wounds were already healed by the third day. Pathetically, he’d been sleeping in dingy passageways or the prefects’ bathroom before relocating after being harassed by the ghosts.

Remus had a plan, avoid them; skip classes, get longer prefect duties, never staying in one spot for too long. He wouldn’t know what would happen if Snape saw him. Although, whatever Dumbledore told him, it kept Snape quite so far. But tonight, he got tired of Moaning Myrtle sobbing.

Before curfew, Remus made it a habit of visiting Y/N, who was still stuck in the wing; both out of guilt and because she was his friend, but he couldn't stay for long — seeing her like that made him wallow in guilt.

Similar to him, Lily had visited, along with the other girls, every day. Today, Lily stayed a little longer, bleeding into the time Remus usually dropped by. He watched as Lily whisper into her ear, causing Y/N to laugh and Lily blush madly as she sat snug by her side. Not wanting to ruin their moment, Remus went to leave before they had the chance to see him.

Remus had another pressing matter anyway.

He entered one of the nearest bathrooms to give himself some sort of pep talk and stared at the mirror.

You can do this. A voice echoed in his head.

Typically, memories from the full moon came back to Remus a few days or even weeks later, his brain usually too foggy a couple of hours after and even then, he would never fully remember everything. He vaguely remembered seeing a flash of Snape’s face and Prongs but Y/N’s screams were one of the clearer memories from that night.

“REMUS! PLEASE REMUS! STOP!”

Remus looked to stare at himself in the mirror. He observed the scar on the bridge of his nose, feeling bile rush up his throat at the sight.

He was a freak, littered with scars covering himself.

He was disgusting.

Ugly.

Pathetic.

Dangerous.

A monster!

4. Anger

Sirius Black had always been loyal, so what changed that night?

He needed to leave. It was no good staying here anymore.

Remus was shaking with rage, twinged with hurt. He paced outside of the common room door and had a few options running through him. Either start a huge fight with Sirius or just… ignore it.

Avoidance.

Maybe he could ignore Sirius forever? Impossible, surely. Sirius would get bored, anxious within a couple of weeks — that was too generous — a few days sounded right.

With his mind made up, Remus crept up to his room. He could hear the faint shouts of James and pondered about just sleeping in the common room or prefects’ bathroom. Even if he did have to listen to Moaning Myrtle.

Maybe because his senses were still coming down from its peak or James was just brash, but Remus didn’t even have to press his ear on the door.

“— done ENOUGH! — hear me? You better — why are YOU crying? You bloody — understand? Understand?! You will not talk — him — best friends my —”

The only person he's told he was coming back was Wormtail and it sounded like he told Prongs.

Remus didn’t care to listen anymore as he pushed open the door. Pete was sitting on his bed, eyes wide at Remus’ presence surrounded by unwrapped wrappers. He always tended to eat while stressed.

Sirius was looking down at the floor as James stood in front of him, scolding him like a child. But, his head shot up once he walked through the door. Out of his peripheral vision, he could see his eyes bloodshot, puffy and circles dark. He didn’t dare look at him.

Remus didn’t acknowledge them, instead moving robotically to the bathroom, changing into his holey yet comfortable clothes before scurrying off to bed, swinging his curtains shut before casting a silencing spell around.

He’d plan to adhere to his avoidance strategy. It worked so far.

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June 18th, 1976 | 1:29 am

“Psst… Moony.”

Remus turned over to face him. “What do you want Peter?”

“Just wanted to check up. You okay?”

“What do you think? Please, leave me alone.” And then closed his bed drapes.

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June 19th, 1976 | 11:37 pm

Peter had crept up to his bed again as Remus laid there awake, thoughts swarming him.

“I’m not in the mood. I’m tired.” He moved to turn over and forced his eyes closed.

Peter had been nothing but amazing. Always thinking about him and his needs but what Remus wanted most was to be alone and Peter's pity and worried features did nothing but make Remus feel like shit.

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June 21st, 1976

In life, there are few things that are certain. Getting older, death, taxes… No matter how hard we try, no matter how good our morals are or our intentions, we all will eventually make mistakes. It’s either as small as burning your food or writing the wrong answer down on a test, but you’re also going to fuck up pretty bad and hurt people. Say something — do something you don’t mean and it’ll end up with both sides hurt. If you want forgiveness, there’s multiple solutions to gain that back, but the two words — obvious, there, waving in front of your face — can be the hardest words to say.

“I’m sorry.” Black muttered for the hundredth time that night. His voice was pushing Remus to the edge as he kept his face straight. Dead. Not once taking Sirius’ shitty apology baits. He continued to stare down at his book, reading silently in his dorm. His teeth hurt from how hard he was clenching his jaw.

Remus was right, of course, he was fucking right. Black had grown anxious as he ignored him.

“I’m sorry.”

Remus never really considered himself violent. Sure, he’s gotten into rows that ended with a punch or hex here or there, but Remus didn’t have violent thoughts. If anything, he prided himself on not being a bonehead like Black and Prongs. But, it took every ounce not to beat the shit out of Black right there and then.

Bastard. Scumbag. You mother fucking betrayer.

Remus never liked not being in control. Not having it scared him too much, feeling more animal than man. He did everything to avoid being violent, the wolf was already violent enough and had too much control and Remus refused to let it dictate human him. There was already too much violence, he never wanted to contribute more.

He did everything not to be a monster. But it's like the wolf roared from deep within, scratching and begging to let him pounce.

Remus wasn’t violent — anyone who met him would vouch for that. Fuck, if he saw a spider, he would open a nearby window and release it. But now, he wanted to slam Sirius against a wall and wrap his hands around his neck and squeeze.

You piece of shit. Wanker. Twat. I want you to feel as much pain as I do.

“Moony, please let me explain —”

All the words suddenly blurred before Remus slammed his book shut, causing to become still and quiet.

Sirius trying to explain — excuse his actions — pushed him over the edge. Remus sent a venomous glare at Sirius, waiting for him to talk. His quietness made everyone uneasy.

Selfish bastard.

Any sympathy Remus held for him this past year, along with any logic, evaporated to the point where he felt a rabid thump spread through him. There was a desperation to relieve himself of it — lash out, scream, cry —

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it,” the rest of the Marauders watched the scene, knowing not to get involved. “It was a mistake and —“

“A mistake?”

Sirius perked up at this. That was the only word he’d spoken to him since the incident. “Honest. I did it because —” “Shut the fuck up.” Remus stood, tall and loomed over Sirius. He could almost smell the fear off him.

He had never been so mad before.

“I — I… I,” stutters Remus. But instead of it being out of shyness or nerves, it was out of pure wrath that he wasn’t able to articulate his emotions properly. He took a deep breath in, attempting to regain control over his emotions but failed as he burned with deep, seething hatred. “I am the monster that mothers tell their children to keep them in at night.”

“Moony —”

“Don’t call me that!” His voice boomed so loud that everyone in the room had to take a step back and shrink down. Remus was always so reserved, only ever lashing out in annoyance close to the full moon but nothing more.

“Living up to your name, aren’t you?” There’s a sarcastic, bitter humour lilt to his voice.

Someone so in control of his emotions, someone with an unbreakable exterior, the only glimpses they’d ever seen of Remus losing control was him snapping at someone close to the full moon but would later apologize within mere seconds. But to see him like that… it was an intrusion, something the Marauders hadn’t ever seen or wanted to before.

“Please, just calm down so we can talk.”

Remus paces around the room. “You — y’know I’ve never understood why everyone lets you get around treating others like shit. First, it was Marlene, James, me, Peter, Lily and Y/N — we all let you get away with it. Outburst after outburst, we all sat back because you were going through shit. But I can’t? I’m not allowed to get angry?!”

Sirius wouldn’t look at him.

“Look at me.” Remus kept his voice low throughout the ordeal, only ever raising if Black interjected. “You coward, look at me!”

5. A lot of anger

He couldn’t meet his eyes so he settled to stare at the scar across his nose. It only angered him more as Remus picked Sirius up and pushed him against the wall as he fisted his shirt.

“I’m sorry.”

Sorry is nothing but a word to you. I gave you my most trusted secrets. I confided in you. I was there for you when you needed it. I loved and cared for you like my own brother but I was nothing more than a pet that you discarded when you got bored. You’re only guilty because of the repercussions you’re facing. Your guilt isn’t nearly enough. Bastard. I trusted you. You’re a Marauder. My best friend. I would’ve done anything for you. You fucking ruined it.

“You did this! You did!”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

He laughs, mocking and loud, void of any emotion. “No, you aren’t. You’re never fucking sorry!”

Stupid fucking selfish arsehole.

“For years you’ve told me that you accepted me — cared for me — loved me like your own brother! That what I am — a-a monster — that it didn’t matter!”

“It didn’t mean anything, I promise! It was a shitty, fucked up prank —”

“A prank?! You used me as a weapon! A toy because how could anyone ever love a werewolf?” Remus’ voice was so low. “You’ve never respected me. If you had any, you wouldn’t have — you - wouldn’t....”

Everything came crashing on Remus at once.

6. The realization settles in

And after nine days, Remus Lupin had finally realized what Sirius Black had done. Before, everything he felt had been true but he hadn’t fully realized the gravity of what happened, as silly as it sounds.

Sirius turned his worst fear into a living nightmare.

In the background, one of James’ Quidditch posters, encased in glass exploded, shattering into millions of pieces from the amount of pure magic radiating off Remus. He didn’t even flinch at the sound.

James finally interjected, placing a hand on Remus’ shoulder. “Lay off him… He isn’t worth it.”

Remus eased off Black instantly. “You had no right… no right…” He pointed. Remus turned his face down as he felt tears build up.

“I trusted you,” he whispers. “Every bit.”

Remus stormed out of the dorm, going to sleep in the common room.

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June 22nd, 1976

7. Depression

When Remus finally let himself cry, he didn’t make a move to leave his bed. Even skipping meal times, leaving James or Pete to bring him food.

Everything felt suffocating, a gnawing feeling that made every part of him ache. Remus couldn’t handle anymore pain or emotions from ‘the prank’ as he felt himself slip into a temporary void.

He hugged his pillow tighter and closed his eyes once more.

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June 23rd, 1976 | 11: 37 pm

Remus had gone straight to bed again, effectively shutting up the rest of the dorm. James was ignoring Black, leaving Remus surprised that he hadn’t made a move to defend his actions. Nonetheless, he was appreciative still. Peter had been trying to appease everyone, not taking sides but still must’ve thought Sirius was in the wrong because he hadn’t talked to him much.

He didn’t ask James to choose between him or Black. Remus was never one for ultimatums but even then, it seemed like James picked him. He was beyond furious, seemingly more than Remus at this point who pathetically wallowed in his depression. He wouldn’t spare Black a second glance, wouldn’t talk to him, shut him down if he tried to speak to him. Hell, he’d even gone as far as to make it very clear to the entirety of Hogwarts that they were no longer friends, making sure to not sit with him, ever. Always choosing to sit by Remus.

They chose his side and a part of Remus felt elated to know they had his back.

This left Black alone, looking at them through tearful gazes. Remus had been ignoring all of them and they seemed to be understanding, avoiding crossing the wordless boundary Remus set in stone.

But, both James and Peter had been checking up on him nightly, always there and he could tell they were getting impatient.

When the lights went out, he heard James crept out of bed. Usually, Remus would find some sort of comfort in knowing who was approaching him, but now, it only left him feeling uneasy.

And then he felt the bed dip and James muttered out a spell.

“Hey, Moony.”

Remus didn’t face him. “Prongs?”

“Hey,” there was a loud sigh, “Do you need anything?”

What was he supposed to say? A hug? To talk? He’d much rather use his avoidance strategy, although he realized it left him alone with too many thoughts and nobody to confide in.

“M’good.” He felt James place a hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll always be there for you. That’s what Marau - that’s what friends are for, no?”

Remus didn’t answer and felt James move to leave. But before he had the chance to slip out, Remus peeked his head from the drapes, announcing just loud enough for Sirius to hear.

“Thanks for saving all of us, James. You’re a true friend.”

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June 24th, 1976

People had their poisons.

Alcohol can make you forget. It blocks out everything and makes the rest of the world fade away until you can’t remember. People gambled to feel a rush, only to realize they dug themself into irreversible debt. Shopping, food, the high from risky behaviour…

But how we manage our poisons is up to the person.

People love to deny that they have addictions. They deny they’re hooked, they deny that they can’t put it down, they deny that they’re scared or want to stop. People only see what they want to see, believe what they want to believe.

And then the truth becomes muddled with lies that it’s hard to recognize the poisons sitting right in front of us. And all we want is more.

For Remus, his poison, his bright red self-destruction button, was smoking.

Granted, he never was a big smoker, typically only smoking when stressed or bored. But he still did it, filling his lungs with poison. But maybe he was wired like that. Besides, what werewolf lives past thirty? Might as well die revelling in the poison that brought him ease…

Remus conjured a ball of bright fire from his hand; fishing out a pack of cigarettes, slipped it past his lips and lit it. He inhaled, feeling the familiar, comforting feeling before dragging it from his lips, blowing out the thick cloud of smoke that left him wanting more.

He’d been sticking to his avoidance tactic strictly now. The Marauders were hovering over him, worry evident on their faces. A few times, Lily and James both invited him to sit. They never fought anymore, or at least in front of him, and it probably was his doing — a group effort into getting him to talk.

So even Lily knew something was wrong… Snape probably told her…

The door clicked open and Remus didn’t have to turn around to know how it was.

“Leave me alone. I’m not ready to talk.”

“Wasn’t gonna make you.”

He spun around, that wasn’t James or Peter. His face softened.

“Well… I’m not,” Y/N said simply, “But the others are about to.”

Remus groaned at that but Y/N smiled and turned around, ushering him over with a little wave. In one hand, she raised the Marauder’s map. “C’mon, I know a place and that they won’t be able to find.”

Remus was intrigued. He stepped out the butt of the cigarette, flicked it into the trash and followed her. Surely he’d already been there but being with Y/N seemed ten folds better than being around the other Marauders.

He followed wordlessly, passageways flying through his head but she never stopped by them. Instead, she climbed onto a ledge, slipping into an area under a large curtain. He followed, eyes lighting up in awe. He’s definitely never been there before.

“Get comfortable,” she said, flinging him a pillow and lighting a few candles.

They sat opposed to each other in complete silence. Y/N flicked back and forth, watching James and Peter scrabble around the castle looking for him. A few times, they passed by, each time leaving Y/N amused.

Remus tapped his leg anxiously. The question remained: Why wasn’t she disgusted with him? Why was she helping him? Why wasn’t she afraid?

Now alone together, those questions dangled on his tongue.

“Why aren’t you afraid of me?”

She looked up at him, finally putting down the map. “Because you’re Remus.” She said, like it was the most obvious answer. “You’re not scary.”

8. Hold onto doubt

The answer irritated him. Another memory unfolded then and he blurted it out. “Why didn’t you cast any spells at me?”

Her brows rose, “I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“I’m dangerous.” His voice was bleak and cold. “Why can't you grasp that?”

She stays quiet for a long time, her head turning to look out the large window. Y/N watched the owls and labyrinth of ancient trees of the forbidden forest and Remus was painfully aware of time slipping by.

“Do you remember that night on the astronomy tower on Halloween? I said that there’s bound to be someone looking at the moon at the same time?”

It takes Remus a moment to remember, but he does. “Yeah. You said that it’s like you’re not alone.”

Y/N turns around to face him. “Exactly. You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He looked away, deliberating. “It’s one thing for me to be alone but then drag you and others down with me.”

“Remus, I’m not going to lie and say I wasn’t scared. I was terrified. I thought that was it.” He gulped. “But I could never be scared of you. The real you - the you right now. I don’t care about what you are. You are more than just a werewolf. I feel safe with you.”

The dark shadows surrounded them as she reiterated herself. “You don’t have to be alone in this.”

He soaks in her words for a while. This time, peering out the window as he breathes in deeply.

Okay. He decided.

“Do you want to know how I got —” he pointed at a scar on his upper forearm. “— this?”

She nodded her head.

“When James turned into his animagus form to show me for the first time, his antlers pierced my skin. I had to lie to Pomfrey and say I fell while playing Quidditch.”

Any invisible barrier between them crashed instantly as she smiled brightly and laughed. So infectious, Remus couldn't help but flash a real grin.

He never realized how beautiful her smile was.

“Oh, and if you ever tell anyone about this place, I’ll skin you.”

“I would never.”

Remus scouted over to her, pressing his back against the cool stone as they sat together in a comfortable stillness. But then she shifted, opening her arms wide. He lent in without hesitation and her arms flung around his neck, pulling him into a tight embrace.

He felt salty tears stinging in the corners of his eyes and let himself soak in her warm.

He really needed that.

Over her shoulder, he returned to watch the stars.

9. Acceptance

Remus learned from a young age that it was better to keep people at an arm's length. Get too close, they’ll dig, find out his condition, fear him and run.

He hates to say it, but he’s not surprised that his secret slipped out. He got too comfortable, got too close... It’s just that the Sirius component was surprising.

But maybe it wasn’t surprising. Ever since the beginning of the year, especially since winter break, Sirius had been reckless more and more lately, and he probably should have seen it coming. He was wild as a result of being freed from the confines of his rigid upbringing.

Sirius Black was unpredictable.

Sirius Black was dangerous when it came to secrets.

Sirius Black was one of his best friends.

Sometimes betrayal is so profound that there’s no way to fix what was lost. The damage is done, irreplaceable, unfixable.

If Remus was sure of anything by the end of that week was that,

a) James Potter and Peter Pettigrew were still his best friends,

b) He almost killed Severus Snape and Y/N L/N,

c) Y/N knew his secret and despite everything, continued to talk to him, support him, be there for him — she accepted him,

d) His walls went up a higher, became stronger and insecurities ran deeper,

e) Lastly, Remus Lupin would never, ever forgive Sirius Black for what he did. Never.

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【 Next Chapter 】

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