#“not bringing you eggs and apples and shit”

[invisiblequeen]

And here's a picture of the Krampus Sim I created showing up at another sim's house with a grocery delivery.

Happy holidays!

[toxictigertonic]

Alright, I've been cursed with new blorbos (don't worry DJ will always be my number one). Outlast trials has me in a chokehold, specifically Franco, but all the prime assets are running around in my brain causing problems. I'm subjecting you to my stupid food headcanons as a result:

COYLE

- This mother fucker drinks hot sauce. Like. Chugs the shit. You can't take him anywhere without him bringing a bottle of Tabasco.

- Takes his coffee black, but will add a little sugar if no one is looking. Can't let people know that he doesn't like plain black coffee.

- He feels like a big breakfast kinda guy, with all the fixings. If you took him to a diner that'd be what he'd get, no matter the time of day.

- Would he disgusted by energy drinks EXCEPT classic redbull. Now imagine this man hyped up on caffeine.

- Would still eat his scrambled eggs if he got shells in them. Would say some shit like "the shells put hair on your chest"

- Trusting this man to bake anything is a fire hazard, it doesn't matter if it's those pre cut cookie rolls, they're catching fire.

- Says he hates desserts then stares down a slice of pecan pie from across the room like it owes him money.

MOTHER GOOSEBERRY

- The only one I trust to cook tbh, and that's not saying much.

- If you took her to get coffee she'd get the sweetest thing on the menu (and Futterman would bitch and moan about it the whole time) or she'd get a chai latte. Futterman would demand a black coffee.

- I would trust her to make me an apple pie and then she'd put the drill in it bc the crust came out wrong.

- She feels like a woman who really likes jam. Maybe I am projecting but jam is cool.

- She will not touch an energy drink bc they taste bad to her, and bc Futterman would throw a fit about how bad they are for your teeth. No caffeine fueled death sprint for her, but based on her singing and the whole angel dust thing I don't think she needs it.

- I would make her pancakes she seems pretty cool.

- Likes the batter for desserts more than the finished products.

FRANCO

- God help us where do I begin

- On one hand I wanna say he makes some bomb ass Italian food. On the other hand I wanna say he burns cereal.

- Speaking of cereal, he's the kinda guy who let's his cereal turn to paste in the bowl before he eats it.

- Considering what we know about the wolf's milk drink, I'm frightened by this man's palette. Genuinely terrified.

- I think he would die if he tasted hot sauce. I think Coyle is aware of this fact and has plans.

- Give him an energy drink if you wanna see him start doing flips. He thinks they're gross but he's also like "fuck yeah pure sugar I love these"

- Likes his cookies so underdone that they're basically raw (me too chief)

- If you cooked him a homemade meal he'd cry while eating it. Then he'd get pissed because you made him cry.

- He's my little skrunkly doo so I'm feeding him wet plaster ❤️

If I'm wrong about anything bc it's actually stated in the lore I do not care tell Red Barrels to get their facts straight (/J I SWEAR)

I haven't had time to look at Gooseberry's or Coyle's lore so I don't know if they have some super important amazing cooking skills that I'm missing out on. Feel free to tell me if you think I'm wrong or have your own ideas about these idiots.

[wileys-russo]

Could you write for maya le tissier please halloween addition where trick or treaters come but maya has nothing for them but reader comes to the rescue

trick or treat II m.le-tissier

"is that yours going?" you glanced up from your textbook at your sister who was frowning at you from her place on the sofa. "no?" you shook your head at the ringing which filled the living room. "well it's not mine! didn't you just change the tone?" mary questioned.

"no? why would i do that?" you scoffed, dropping your gaze back to your textbook to study. "because your little girlfriend said it was the same tone as her alarm!" mary huffed, throwing a cushion in your direction, eyes narrowing as yours widened and you hurried to your feet.

"see! idiot." mary mumbled, attention falling back to her show as you sprinted into the kitchen where your phone was on charge. "i heard that! feel free to go back to your own home mary." you warned, your sister only using you for your prime account which you refused to give her the password to.

"alright alright! no need to be hasty with it." mary held up her hands in surrender. "hello?" you grabbed your phone on the last ring, clutching at your chest, not even having checked who was calling you.

"i need help!" you frowned hearing the panicked voice of your girlfriend. "why what happened? are you hurt? do i need to call an ambulance?" you asked, mary glancing over to you with a concerned frown.

"no! i'm being held hostage in my own home!" maya hissed quietly and you heard a thump. "what! hang on i'm calling the police." you put her on speaker and gestured for mary to hand you her phone.

"what? no i don't need the police! i'm being held hostage by angry children." maya huffed as you scrunched your face up in confusion, waving away an equally confused looking mary who offered you her phone.

"wait did you just go for a run or something? why are you panting? you sound like murphy." maya changed topic swiftly. "may focus! i need a bit of context to this hostage and children situation please." you sighed tiredly at her lack of explanation.

"oh! well obviously i forgot that it's halloween and all these kids keep turning up and i haven't gone shopping so i told them they could have an apple? and now they won't leave till i give em a chocolate or something!" maya rambled and your frown immediately switched to a grin as you bit your lip to stop laughing, covering up your half giggle with a cough.

"babe it's not funny! they won't leave and i heard one of them mention getting eggs." she whined in annoyance. "so you're telling me that you're allowing yourself to be bullied by children? because you offered them apples....on halloween." you repeated slowly, shit eating grin only growing as mary started to laugh loudly from the living room at your word.

"nah stop taking the piss this is serious! i don't want my house or my car egged!" she groaned in annoyance, and you heard a gasp and a few more thumps. "oh my god they're banging on the door again i think its a new group, they're creating alliances and forming a small army help me!" she again hissed as you shook your head.

"and how would you like me to do that my love? come and scare the big bad kiddies away for you?" you mocked sarcastically, pulling yourself up to sit on the counter. "woman i swear to god-" maya began to warn as you heard some movement and rustling.

"go to the shops and bring me some chocolate or something to give them as a peace offering!" she ordered with a huff. "may, baby its halloween there isn't a chance in hell i can get chocolate at....nine fourteen at night. they'll leave eventually i'm sure it's almost past their bedtime!" you teased, moving to rummage through your own cupboards.

"oh my god they threw an egg, babe they threw an egg at my window the little shits!" she scoffed with a gasp. "and you want to reward that with chocolate? call the police to disperse them if you're that worried." you laughed, finding what you were looking for and dropping it in your lap.

"no! i don't want to get the reputation as the cranky old woman who hates children and hates halloween or as the health nut who offers apples. god i would have egged my house too at their age!" she moaned in realization as you unwrapped a twirl, popping it into your mouth.

"are you seriously...did you just open a chocolate?" your girlfriend accused as you hummed happily. "mm, twirl." you answered with a mouthful as again she gasped.

"oh you dickhead! come bring me some fucking chocolate i know you've always got some i've seen the period drawer, hell i fill it up every month for you!" your girlfriend demanded and you couldn't argue that point, the brunette nothing but the biggest sweetheart when it was that time of the month.

"say please and maybe i'll consider it." you wound her up, hearing another thump which you assumed to be yet another egg hauled at the poor girls house, already moving off the counter to gather your supplies as you squished the phone between your shoulder and ear.

"please. but hurry!" she groaned and before you could say another word she'd abruptly hung up. "do i even want to know the details?" your sister grinned as you hung your bag over your shoulder and rolled your eyes with a shake of your head.

"i expect you out of my house by the time i get back." you warned, shoving her head and darting back as the older girl lunged for you. "please! like you'll be coming back." mary chuckled and stretched out more on your sofa, making herself comfortable.

"go home!" you warned again, smacking her in the face with the cushion she'd thrown at you earlier and heading for the door.

"i am half way through this season of real housewives i can't stop now! kicking your own flesh and blood out onto the cold dark sidewalk, you're a disgrace to the earps family name." mary yelled after you with a shake of her head.

"and you're a thirty year old mooching freeloader who won't cough up an extra twelve dollars a month for her own subscription, get out!" you laughed, closing the front door before you could hear her reply, already certain you'd return and she would just be passed out on the lounge as always.

~

under strict instruction from the brunette you'd parked in the street behind her house, letting yourself into her backyard through the back fence, armed with a bag full of lollies and a very amused smile.

you spotted your girlfriend sat on the floor behind her sofa, glancing over the top toward her front door and windows which she'd drawn the curtains over making you roll your eyes.

you knocked suddenly at the back door as you heard claws skidding over toward you and maya jumped about a foot in the air at the noise. though seeing it was only you she hurried to her feet, pushing murphy out of the way with her foot as she slid the door open and hastily pulled you inside.

"trick or treat!" you teased, handing her the bag and leaning in to kiss her only for her to duck around you. "were you seen? followed?" she questioned in a whisper as you rolled your eyes. "no! for god sakes may they're kids, they have to be about ten years old i drove past them." you laughed as she nodded and moved to the kitchen.

"okay, off you go!" she dumped the confectionery into a bowl and held it out to you expectantly. "no! this is your problem to fix baby, i only agreed to bring you supplies." you held your hands up and stepped back as she groaned and smacked the bowl back down on the counter.

"they'll eat me alive after i offered them apples, or they'll egg me. please!" she begged as you firmly shook your head. "and you'd rather they egg me? thanks a bunch." you scoffed.

"no! you're too gorgeous baby, they'll be so dazzled by englands star striker handing them some chocolate they'll take it and be on their merry way!" she smiled charmingly, which normally would work however tonight you held firm.

"rehearsed that little speech before i got here did you?" you sighed, sitting down on the arm of her lounge. "baby! please." she knocked your legs apart and stood between them, the taller girl pouting adorably.

"no! may the more time you spend whining to me the more eggs they're gathering to throw." you smiled making her throw her head back with a groan. "but they haven't met you, and like i said you're just so gorgeous, and kind, and sweet, and funny." tucking her head into your neck you felt her lips start to kiss a trail down the column of your throat with each compliment she threw your way.

"and i'll make it worth your while love, scouts honour." she switched tactics, pushing you back onto the lounge and smiling down at you suggestively.

"you weren't a scout." you teased with a wink as she smacked your leg playfully. "i still know my way around a rope and some knots baby, happy to show you later if you do this teeny little favor for me." she smirked which did have some affect on you as your cheeks flushed bright red.

"no! just go and get it over it." you declined again, pushing her away with your foot as she moaned dramatically, stomping over and grabbing the bowl with a huff. "will you at least come with me?" she requested to which you nodded and hauled yourself up.

"go on." you nudged her in the back as she hesitated by the door, sighing and yanking it open. "peace offering. you all stop the eggs, i'll make sure i have chocolate next year!" she called out to the small group of children huddled on her lawn.

"correction you all clean up the eggs and then you get the chocolate, and we don't find out who you all are and call your parents about this vandalism." you stepped out and warned more sternly, a few of the older ones sharing a look.

ducking back inside you grabbed some paper towel and multipurpose spray, tossing them onto the grass and fixing those who hadn't run off with a hard look as they hurried to start wiping down your girlfriend's windows.

with that maya left the bowl on her door step, gently pushing you inside and closing the door, making a point to dead lock it after her. "you're gonna be a top mum one day babe." the taller girl grinned, hands moving to grab your hips as you hummed, returning her smile.

"you're welcome baby. now what was that you said about making it worth my while?"

[mllenugget]

Hello I mcyt fandom-ified la Team du Lundi members and wrote a shit ton of text about it

After exhausting myself on trying to catch up on the current QSMP lore I got a sudden craving for a more familiar and fast paced kind of minecraft content and ended up rewatching all the Team du Lundi's SMP best of's I could find

And while doing so with my brain still hazed in fandom brainrot, I started picking up on minor details or info the players casually dropped, and drew parallels to the French speakers' QSMP counterparts This is going to be a long wordy post I don't even know what I am rambling about and for. Three things you need to be aware of about la Team du Lundi before reading :

Baghera, Antoine and Etoiles are the only QSMP players that are part of la Team du Lundi

As far as I remember the only two elements that suggest that la Team du Lundi's SMP could be canon to QSMP are Antoine being pressured into building another Tower of Shit, and Baghera's infamous fountain being mentioned when she was asked if her character remembers anything from her past before the island

La Team du Lundi's SMP was NOT a roleplaying server, it was just a private survival server for a small circle of friends casually playing together. So whenever I quote someone in this specific post, it is the streamer : there is no character other than the persona the streamer is usually showing on stream, but I just thought it would be fun to interpret certain situations while keeping in mind the QSMP lore. And here goes :

Baghera claims that when she was a kid she strongly believed that she could breathe underwater. The others joke about her having fins

Antoine jokingly tells Baghera he doesn’t need oxygen at all

Antoine claims he will still be alive thousands of years forwards

Antoine’s voice shifts when he wants to appear creepy

Baghera built an aquarium at her place, then helped Antoine build one at his tower, then built a giant swimming pool, then a fountain, then a waterslide- do you see a theme ?

Baghera knows that her skin is actually that of a chick and not a duckling, and calls it so here

Chat said that Baghera has a middle child syndrome, justifying that she bullies Angle Droit because Etoiles bullies her in the first place (Etoiles has also called her « little sister » in a derogatory way)

Etoiles has repeatedly asked people to play Valorant with him at least once

Here's a clip of Etoiles getting languaged in french and owing "a gifted sub in the swear jar"

Unrelated random clip of Etoiles because it creates happy hormones in me brain

Etoiles is regularly refered to as "the warrior"

Etoiles guided the whole group during an expedition to the End and he was literally glowing doing so (enchanted arrows effect) Everyone called him "the guide"

Baghera was the one who gave the final blow to the Enderdragon (and died from magic right after)

Etoiles spent most of his time adventuring in order to bring stuff and gear back to everyone for their builds

Etoiles asked Aypierre for help in order to design a redstone door for his cave which could only open upon solving a puzzle (which was egg & arrow related) (Aypierre was not a member of the server)

Etoiles built a nightclub with the walls and ceiling covered in wardenblocks making it look like a starry sky. He also rehomed Allays holding golden apples inside claiming them to be the souls working for him and that they lived there peacefuly

Etoiles jokingly talks about Antoine acting jealous and violent towards him because Etoiles told him he wanted to go and visit Kameto (who also was not a member of the server)

Baghera (along with Horty) had a rivalry with Joueur du Grenier (host of the server with admin powers) after he decided to build a massive parking lot right next to their house. They countered by covering the whole thing with dirt, followed by JDG building a factory and the two parties went back and forth. Baghera argued that it was stupid because they didnt even have cars to begin with (which is a sentence she reused when talking about Forever's roads) Also she tells JDG that he could've built a seaport instead, which makes JDG contemplate the thought of building an airport (and though he ended up never building it, I am side eyeing the French's plane crash)

At some point JDG wonders about what a roleplaying minecraft server would look like (RPZ 2), to which Baghera replies that she has a hard time picturing the thing "We'd all just build things you see ? I don't think we'd create stories, we would all just be like "I'm a builder, ah you too ? Well awesome, builders, cool"" and I find this to be hilariously ironic (fun fact : Baghera had no idea that QSMP was a roleplaying server when she first joined and often claims she would've taken a different approach with her character had she known right off the gate)

As I was finishing to write this down, these fuckers (/lh) decided to host a closure night for the server as they've never really officially did it, everyone just sort of deserted the server after a while. Baghera, Etoiles and Antoine kept referring to QSMP throughout the night, mostly talking about how weird it felt without mods. Among other meta commentary things

They mentionned Cellbit and Bad multiple times as the group was trying to solve enigmas. Antoine talked about "the cultural sharing" between communities as he taught insults to each others with Mike, Roier and Maximus in their respective languages Multiple more players were namedropped (including eggs) while Antoine was talking about how the server functions

Yes, Baghera and Etoiles kept their QSMP skins. Etoiles with his code corrupted purgatory one, and Baghera with her fading pink disheveled hair (with the addition of her cubito wearing Horty's merch)

Baghera admits that going back to this small familiar vanilla server feels like coming back home to your family during the holidays

Team du Lundi's cameos in QSMP :

Though Pomme has never canonically met JDG (even though most of her parents have talked about him to her at least once), she occasionaly breaks the 4th wall to refer to him. She once compared one of BBH's "vacation" flower shirts with his, and when Foolish and Bad asked her to elaborate (obviously not getting the reference) she proceeded to play JDG's music theme with the flute instead (Also I really feel the need to once more point out how mindblowing it is for your average french speaking viewer to have JDG's intro theme being added to the mod they use in the QSMP because of how anchored it is within french internet pop culture. Like this shit has been existing for 14 fucking years, it's part of the childhood of a lot of us, so to find a clip of British hardcore player Philza peacefuly listening to Mexican egg admin Tallulah play this theme on her flute feels like a multiverse fever dream)

Horty has been on Quesadilla Island through cc!Baghera's account, but neither of them really wanted to justify it RP wise. Baghera just wanted to give her best friend a tour of the island. Horty only got to meet Richarlyson who gave her a tour of Cellbit's castle and made her pick a room (she chose Chaos). She also chatted with Etoiles who tagged along for a bit and (this is obviously justified by it being a one-shot out of roleplay filler episode kind of night) they both already knew each other and were on friendly enough terms to bicker with one another Also she was part of the French speakers Quackity reached out to to invite on the server, but she had to decline because she was very busy at that time (and also not interested) Also also she was Baghera's teammate for that Formula 4 event, and Baghera has discussed it and showed pictures to a couple of islanders, including Richas who was very hyped about it

Another player the viewers were hoping to see on Quackity's server is Mynthos. He exists within the server with the picture of him that hangs in Pomme's art gallery, the cursed animation video that used to play in La France, as well as with Aypierre's health potion factory that bears his name

Angle Droit and Zerator are sometimes namedropped when the French speakers talk with their chat. Angle Droit frequently raids Baghera's and Antoine's streams, and though it has never been confirmed, a lot of viewers theorized that she was the +1 player Baghera and Etoiles wanted to invite on the server had they won the elections.

As for Zera, Etoiles went AFK on QSMP a couple of times in order to test some of Zerator's TrackMania maps (which he later discussed with Pac). I also remember a very trivial conversation Etoiles had with Mouse and Aypierre where he laughed about hurting his back very badly after carrying a fellow streamer during a caritative event, said event was hosted by Zerator (he's also the one judging them with concern from his desk)

I'm done.

Bonus alternative design for Angle Droit because at first I thought she was a fox then it turned out she was a corgi but then she changed it again to a fox and woop

[wovenstarlight]

and another rant i have built up over jinjae is their everything around food. the first instance i can remember is the courtesy chocolates SHJ brings HYJ after the Babar dungeon, when he's in the hospital (chapters 80/81), which he says is for HYJ due to the stress he must be feeling over HYH. and then immediately kills any goodwill in the very next sentence by going Wowww you're so useful and i'd love to acquire you etc etc. HYJ's not even the one who accepts them from SHJ, that's BYR, and later HYJ says he only eats them because he has nothing better to do (no other option than SHJ, huh...) and even then the Dokkaebi ends up eating half the box. gift that's barely accepted.

the next instance i can think of is post-human trafficking auction in chapter 127 where SHJ makes him eggs, but. well. literally as he's cooking they have this exchange:

(this got so fucking long i had to put it under a cut. takes your hand come with me on this journey)

[SHJ] “I’d like for you to stay unharmed until I grow bored. Mentally, I mean.” [HYJ] “And my body doesn’t matter?” [SHJ] “If your bulk decreases, you’ll be easier to carry around.”

so "i'm making food for you" but also "i don't care if your health deteriorates and/or you lose weight, as long as you're useful". an interesting combination of messages to send, given that HYJ's also struggling in this scene to figure out what SHJ wants from him, what with seemingly looking out for him and his loved ones by lending Sillekia to BYR for fighting HYH, but also still continuing with this "my item" shit and only looking at him for his usefulness. but this instance IS notable in that it's the first time SHJ cooks for HYJ. a slight turning point in their relationship...?

it does seem so cuz after that... HYJ becoming sick of orange- and apple-flavored mana potions because he chugs them so often, and SHJ responding to this in chapter 185 (birthday arc, before HYJ admitted he stole his memories) by acquiring swiss chocolate-flavored mana potions for him. already he's started with the little treats.

and then. sorry i'm feeling the 216 feelings. 1 minute. Okay normal. and then. yes once again it's chapter 216, when SHJ first starts making readably genuine attempts at kindness towards HYJ, starting the entire interaction by making him a drink that "looked like it was just juice, but it was actually sweet. Tasty." normal behavior from SHJ to rent out the entire rooftop pool and bar to show off his bartending skills to HYJ btw.

then the VR dungeon arc, where SHJ can't see HYJ until he installs the first disc, but the moment he does he starts being absolutely unbearable, the relevant part being when HYJ's reached Achates and is stressed out over HYH's treatment to the point of losing his appetite, at which point SHJ sends him the "Must Eat Well" quest to coax him into eating, rewarding him with chocolate-flavored mana potions, which HYJ himself admits remind him of SHJ:

‘But why are they chocolate-flavored?’ It made me think of that person. It had tasted good.

we're told in chapter 249 that SHJ needs to expend tremendous effort to give HYJ quest rewards and that whatever he gives usually gets cut down (he's talking about point conversions there but i suspect it applies to other rewards as well). so to specifically seek out two potions, especially ones he knows HYJ will prefer more than the common fruit-flavored ones... [puts on my large jinjae-shaped sunglasses like that shit they sell for new years]

and ok i jumped ahead to 249 for the rewards thing but come back to 245 with me and look at that series of cooking quests SHJ sent HYJ to guide him through cooking dinner for himself and HYH. copying over my discord messages from when this chapter dropped for this part of the analysis:

ALSO SPEAKING OF SHJ that chain of quests at the end. he is driving me crazy but yes the cooking quests. like. okay. I mentioned before [...] that I considered this a jinjae scene chapter because. the layers of it all right. he sees hyj wants to cook for his brother but can't decide what to make/how to make it cuz the decision paralysis is hitting after the longass day he's had. so he goes ahead and picks a meal and gives him step by step instructions. overly specific so hyj doesn't hit some dumb roadblock like "idk where the spatula is" and lose it for real. it took multiple quests to give the instructions it might've been easier to give him a prepared meal from whatever store he's picking these rewards from but he spent that time anyway because I'm pretty sure going through the process soothed hyj. normality after the Everything of it all. and then at the end of it because he Knows hyj is prone to not eating when he gets stressed he baits him into eating with rewards. like. Bro. Bro like. OUGH. he cares. he cares.... AND ALSO THAT LAST FUCKING QUEST "made with a spoonful of your partner's love" IS NOT SOMETHING THE SYSTEM WOULD SAY SHJ I KNOW YOURE LEANING INTO "OH NO THE SYSTEMS ALTERING MY MESSAGES DW" AND LETTING YOUR FEELINGS SHOW. YOUR PAPER THIN MASK overemotional over cooking. god. god and even after the cooking thing knowing that hyj would freak upon waking up and not seeing hyh and so keeping an eye on hyh and sending him a quest to tell him where he is.... like fuck dude. FUCK!

ok that's enough of that excerpt this is starting to derail from food analysis. wait hold on actually 249's point about the cost of sending quests and rewards makes the cooking quest series even more impactful because how much did SHJ spend to go to that level of detail and care for HYJ!!!

anyway back to food analysis. 256 where HYJ dies to the inscription process and SHJ purposely serves him bitter tea and sweet cookies to point out that he shouldn't take rewards that come at great costs. SHJ you really love communicating things to people through food, huh? but the fact that the second he's understood SHJ takes away the bitter tea and replaces it with something less bitter and more savory. the fact that when the scout finds him, the last thing SHJ does, even after draping his coat over HYJ to protect him from the shards of falling sky, is refill his teacup. the fact that HYJ drinks it and thinks about how it's warm.

GOD!!! do you see my vision. do you see. SHJ and HYJ and cooking and eating as an act of caring. an act of love.

[mickstart]

Do you have any more inconsequential headcanons for Ratiorine/them individually? Like favorite food, color, ect. Just stuff that doesn't really matter but is fun to think about lol

Oogh okay. Well. Consider Aventurine's favourite food being a really simple stew he can vaguely recall his sister making that's kind of been Lost with the loss of the avgin culture. Until Ratio goes on an intense research deep dive and puts his cooking skills and his historical skills together to figure out what it was and how to make it. I don't think I can do justice to how aventurine feels eating it again - how it's both melancholic and happy, how it sends him back to simple but hard days, how both Ratio and his sister loved him enough to make this for him despite barriers and that makes it taste the same all these years later.

Ratio's favourite food is probably something pretty lavish I think. An indulgence like his baths. He pampers himself a Lot and he's a crazy good chef. It's still probably some sort of roast where the only "unhealthy" indulgent part is the amount of oil he uses but the taste is Rich. I don't think he's too big on sweet stuff (except bakklava?) but aventurine LOVES them and pesters him to bake for him.

God now I'm thinking about them grocery shopping ... Aventurine has never really had to Do It. First he wasn't in a position to and then he kind of went straight to having everything delivered to him by the IPC, but ratio cooks for himself and is picky about his ingredients. So he takes him through proper full on farmers markets, hand in hand, examining all the fruit and veg carefully... Both of them getting to experience normal domesticity, checking eggs and picking out the best apples... Aventurine overloads their bags because he sees something he wants it he buys it. Ratio has a strict shopping list that aventurine is ignoring the hell out of. Ratio gives a butcher extremely specific directions for what cut of meat he wants and aventurine is in the fishmongers like "that looks DISGUSTING. How much?"

Aventurine keeps making them stop to buy snacks / try free samples... Ratio rolls his eyes but he's never done any of this either usually he just slams his bust on to cancel out the noise gets his shit and leaves. Now he's eating "artisan waffles" with ice cream and bringing home tacky art pieces because aventurine LOVES tacky and just! AGH! Aventurine getting to experience domestic stuff that has been kept from him! Aventurine discovering the sense of control you get from grocery shopping yourself. Ratio having someone who likes being around him so much they can have fun just going to get groceries!!!!

[hauntedhowlett-writes]

title: a million moments

pairing: pre-outbreak!joel miller/female reader

rating: explicit (18+ MDNI)

chapters: 1/1

summary: a slice of a happy life with joel miller.

read on ao3 | masterlist

author’s note: this fluffy fic is based off of this gif set by @serenaxpedro , this ask, and this one! requests are open if you’ve got something you’re itching to read, and please consider leaving a lil comment if you enjoyed this fic! 💕

contents warnings/additional tags: explicit sexual content (18+ MDNI), no use of y/n, fluff!!!!, happy and soft pre-outbreak joel as the lord intended, established relationship, domestic as hell!!!!, discussions of marriage, pet names, dirty talk, oral sex (f receiving), unprotected p in v, minor breeding kink. let me know if any are missing!

You’re finishing up breakfast, talking with Sarah as she tells you about a test she has coming up, when Joel shuffles into the kitchen, yawning widely as he scrubs a hand through his hair.

“My favorite girls,” he says, pressing a kiss first to Sarah’s cheek before wrapping his arms around your middle and leaning his head against your shoulder blade, eyes falling closed again. “Smells good.”

“I made eggs. Yours are cold because you kept hitting the snooze button,” you tease. You can feel his lips spread into a smile against your back. “Sit. Eat. I need to make lunches.”

He brings a palm up to turn your face to his, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips over your shoulder. The kiss is followed by three squeezes to your hip before he reaches past you to grab the plate you made for him, popping it in the microwave.

With the two Millers chatting behind you, you assemble their lunches. Sarah always requests a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while Joel prefers to bring two ham and cheese sandwiches to work. They each get apple slices and a bag of chips, and you slip a Twinkie into Joel’s box as well, knowing he has a sweet tooth.

Which reminds you…

“Joel, don’t forget you have a dentist appointment at two,” you tell him.

“Shit. I mean, shoot,” he replies.

“Swear jar,” you and Sarah say in unison. The teen giggles as Joel grumbles under his breath, digging his wallet from his pants. He checks his watch. “Finish up, baby girl, we gotta get goin’.”

You watch as Sarah shoves the last of her toast into her mouth. Joel stands, sticking his plate in the sink and pressing a kiss to your cheek before he leaves the kitchen in search of his work boots.

“Babe! Have you seen—“

“On the porch!” You call, cutting him off.

You zip up Sarah’s lunch box, handing it to her as she flies through the kitchen.

“Thank you!” She calls, blowing you a kiss as she heads for the front door. You wave to her, watching through the bay window as Joel gets into the truck, waving through the windshield as he backs out.

You’re smiling to yourself as you clean up the sink, humming a vague tune as you stick the breakfast dishes in the dishwasher. Your mind drifts back to the night you met Joel Miller, about a year ago.

“Please tell me you’re not about to rent that,” a masculine voice asks from beside you, making you jump, nearly losing your hold on the DVD case you were reading, a copy of The Lord of the Rings that was sitting in the new release section.

The man eyeing the DVD case is tall and broad shouldered, with biceps straining the material of his t-shirt. He has curly dark hair and kind brown eyes that are looking at you expectantly.

“Oh, uh, I was thinking about it. Is it bad?” You ask. He runs a hand through his hair.

“No, no, it’s a great choice it’s just…my daughter just finished the book this week and I told her I’d rent her the movie when she did,” he admits.

“Oh! You go ahead and rent it, then,” you tell him, holding the case out to him.

“Are you sure?” He asks, reaching for it. His fingertips brush against yours, the slight touch enough to leave you craving more as you return his bright smile. “I’m Joel, by the way.”

After returning his introduction with your own, he lingers for a moment. You’re just staring at each other with goofy smiles on your faces.

“Could I…make it up to you? With dinner?” He finally asks.

“I’d like that, Joel.”

You finish the dishes and grab a rag to wipe down the counters when you notice the lunch box still sitting there. You can’t help the little laugh that escapes you.

Checking the time, you head back to the bedroom to get ready for your shift at the hair salon, resolving to bring Joel his lunch during your break.

________

Joel sees your car pull up at the work site and his face splits in a grin. He tugs his work gloves off and goes to meet you.

“Well, hello there, gorgeous,” he calls. God, he loves the way your cheeks turn the prettiest shade of pink just for him. “What’s the occasion?”

“The occasion, Joel Miller, is that you forgot your lunch at home,” you say, shaking the lunch box in your hand. He laughs.

“What would I do without you?” He asks, wrapping his arms around your shoulders. Your head tips back to look at him and presses a kiss to your lips. “Stay to eat with me?”

“Sure. Let me grab my lunch. I’ll meet you at your truck,” you say, squeezing his hip three times as you pull away. He tugs you back for another kiss, swallowing your giggles. “Joel, let me go.”

“Never, darlin’.”

________

You’re sitting between Joel’s legs, your back pressed to his chest, in the bed of the truck. He’s parked beneath a large tree, the shade a relief from the Texas heat as you both enjoy your sandwiches.

“What are your thoughts on marriage?” Joel asks, apropos of nothing. You blink.

“In general? They’re positive ones. Why?”

You feel him shrug beneath you. “Just been thinkin’ about it lately.”

Your smile makes your cheeks ache.

________

Joel stops at the store on the way home, a spring in his step from a good day. He scrutinizes the flower selection, hands on his hips as he tries to pick out a bouquet. His eyes land on a bouquet of bursting pink peonies.

Perfect.

On the drive home, he hums along to the classic rock radio, fingers drumming in the steering wheel, flowers settled on the passenger seat with care. His mind drifts back to the conversation at lunch, and how you’d grinned at him when he mentioned he’d been thinking about marriage lately.

And it’s the truth, he’d been thinking about it a lot. Every time he turned over in bed and slipped an arm around your waist, tugging you closer. Or when he’d come into the kitchen and find you bent over Sarah’s math homework with a furrow in your brow as you tried to help her, despite math being your weakest subject. Or finding the little notes left in his lunch box, scribbled I love yous on colorful paper that he keeps in his glove box for safekeeping.

He thinks about it every time he opens his wallet and sees the folded photo strip of you, him, and Sarah, squeezed into a photo booth at a carnival as you make silly faces at the camera. Or when you’re getting ready in the morning, slicking lip gloss onto your pretty lips and he wants to kiss it all away.

There are a million moments that he thinks about marrying you.

Joel walks in on one such moment this evening. You’re alone in the kitchen, humming as you stir something in the pot on the stove. He steps up behind you, wrapping an arm around your waist and pressing a kiss to your neck.

“Hey, baby,” he murmurs between kisses.

“Hey, handsome,” you reply, turning to face him. Your eyes light up when you see the flowers in his hand. “Those for me?”

“For my one and only,” he confirms, letting you take them from him. You press your nose to the blooms, inhaling deeply.

“They’re amazing,” you gush, moving around the kitchen to find a vase to fill with water. You hand them back to Joel and he removes the wrapping paper, using the kitchen shears to cut the ends off the stems.

You set a glass vase of water on the kitchen table and Joel tips the flowers into them, watching with a small smile as you arrange them to look their best.

“I love them,” you tell him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders.

“I love you,” he says.

________

Joel kisses you breathless, right there in the kitchen. His tongue slides against yours, his hands smoothing down your waist until they grip your hips and tug you closer.

“Gross,” Sarah comments from the doorway. Joel pulls back abruptly. He squeezes your hips three times before letting go, crossing to the doorway to pull Sarah into a hug.

“Set the table,” he tells her, ruffling a hand through her curly hair. She groans, batting at his hand and ducking away from him to grab the silverware.

The three of you enjoy dinner, followed by Joel starting up a movie that Sarah’s been begging to watch.

“Don’t fall asleep,” Joel tells her.

“I won’t!” Sarah insists.

She’s out cold twenty minutes later. Joel laughs silently.

“I’ll get her in bed,” he says, shifting out from beneath her and picking her up from the couch. “Meet you in the bedroom?”

You nod, turning the TV off and putting away the blanket the three of you had been sharing. You head upstairs to your shared bedroom, changing into one of Joel’s well loved t-shirts before climbing into bed, turning the bedside lamp on.

“Never gets old,” Joel says when he comes in a moment later. He reaches behind his head, tugging his shirt up and off.

“What’s that?” You ask.

“You, in my bed. In my clothes,” he says, shoving his jeans down his thighs and kicking them away. You raise an eyebrow at him. “I’ll put them in the hamper later, I swear, let me just hold you.”

He crawls into bed, flopping beside you with a groan and shimmying around until he’s pulled you into his body, tugging your leg over his hip and pressing his head to your chest with a sigh. You run your fingers through his soft curly hair.

“Love you,” he says into your chest.

“You sayin’ that to me or my boobs?” You ask, teasing lilt to your voice.

“Both, definitely both,” he confirms, lifting his head. He brings a hand to the back of your neck to drag your lips to his. The kiss is slow and syrupy, no rush and all the time in the world to enjoy each other.

Joel’s mouth opens against yours, tongue exploring at his leisure. His hand slides down your back until he grips a handful of your ass, tugging you closer until your pussy drags against his hardening cock.

You whine against his lips, and he repeats the action. “You feelin’ a little needy, baby?”

You nod, and he shifts forward, pressing your back to the mattress and hovering over you. His mouth trails across your jaw and down your neck, wet hot kisses marking you like a tattoo, his love seeping beneath your skin.

His calloused fingers drag your shirt up, bunching it up beneath your armpits to expose your breasts to the cool bedroom air. You squirm beneath him as he kisses your sternum before taking one pert nipple between his lips with little preamble.

His tongue swirls around your hard nipple before he draws back with a nip of teeth that makes you gasp. You can feel his grin against your skin as he moves to give your other breast the same treatment.

Joel slips a hand into your panties, finger sliding through your wet folds and he groans. “God, this pussy, baby. Always so fuckin’ wet for me.”

A finger dips into your entrance and you keen, pressing your head back against the pillow. He shushes you as he kisses your tummy. He withdraws his hand to your whine of displeasure.

Joel tugs your underwear over your hips, dragging them down your legs before he tosses them to the side. His hands press your legs apart so that he can position himself on his belly between them, face close to where you crave him most. He kisses your inner thighs, teasing you mercilessly.

“Joel,” you whine. Your fingers tangle in his hair.

He chuckles. “You want my mouth, sweetheart?”

“Yes,” you groan.

“Ask nicely.”

“Please, put your mouth on me, baby.”

He licks through your folds, swirling his tongue deftly over your sensitive clit. The sudden stimulation makes your hips buck against his face and he throws an arm over you to keep you still.

Joel is a man on a mission, pulling out all the moves he knows drive you wild. Circling your clit before sucking it between his lips, dipping down to your entrance to drive his tongue against you to drink up your essence. His teeth graze the bundle of nerves and you bite back a shout, hips fighting against his hold.

His free hand presses a finger to your hole, slipping inside you wet heat. He groans against you, the vibration of it making you whine. One finger becomes two that he curls against your front wall, grazing a spot inside of you that makes you see stars.

He looks up at you from between your legs, brown eyes shaded with lust as he works you until you shatter, your release dripping down his wrist as he slows his hand and draws out the swipes of his tongue in broad strokes.

You sink into the mattress, a boneless heap in the aftermath. Joel sits up with a smug smile, crawling over your body until his face hovers above yours.

“You wanna taste?” He murmurs, voice a low rumble you feel through all your nerve endings. You nod and he presses his fingertips to your lips, urging them to part. You lick the taste of yourself from his skin, tongue sliding over the digits reverently.

He presses against your tongue slightly before withdrawing, replacing his fingers with his lips and tongue in a deep and dirty kiss. You reach a hand into his boxers, gripping his length and pumping it leisurely. He hisses, hips flexing into your hold.

“Want your cock, baby,” you whisper, your thumb circling the head and smearing the drop of precum gathered at the slit around the crown. “Please?”

Joel shoves his boxers down in a hurry and you giggle at the display of desperation. He takes himself in hand, sliding himself through your wetness, bumping your still sensitive clit. He notches himself to your entrance, pressing forward in a slow slide until he’s pressed so deep and close you don’t know where you start and he ends.

His body is a welcome weight against yours as he flexes his hips, drawing back before snapping them forward in a harsh thrust. You gasp.

“That’s right, baby,” he says, teeth gritted. “This pretty cunt is all mine, huh?”

“Yours,” you agree, nails scraping against his shoulders. “Wan’ you to fill me up, Joel.”

His hips stutter. “Yeah? You want me drippin’ out of this pretty little pussy?”

“Yes, yes, yes,” you chant back. He bites at your neck before sitting up on his heels, your legs held up against one shoulder as he uses a rough grip on your thighs to slam into you over and over and over.

You have to slap a palm over your mouth to keep the noises you’re making at manageable volume. His grin is near feral.

“Can’t help yourself, huh, darlin’? Wanna scream so bad over how my cock’s making you feel,” he growls. Your eyes flutter shut as you let him command your body how he desires.

You can feel your second orgasm creeping up on you as your belly starts to tighten, like all your nerves are gearing up to shatter in unison.

“Come on, baby, wanna feel you cum on my cock,” he tells you, his thrusts sloppy as he chases his own release. “Make that pussy milk me.”

It’s his dirty words that send you over the edge, forcing you to bite your lip to the point of pain. He lets your legs fall to his hips as he presses deeply into you, his cock pulsing his warm release as he slams his lips to yours, swallowing your noises and mixing them with his own.

His hips slow until he’s just pressed inside of you, his kisses turning into soft pecks to your lips. He lifts his head to look at you, smoothing your hair back from your sweaty forehead with a tender hand.

You smile, turning your head to press a kiss to his open palm.

“I love you, Joel.”

________

As Joel looks down at you, his heart squeezes in his chest. There was a time, around when Sarah’s mom left them both without warning, that he thought love was a hoax. That no one actually found it for themselves.

But looking into your eyes, he finds he was wrong. All that pain was just meant to lead him to you. He wants a million of these moments with you.

“I love you, too, sweetheart,” he murmurs.

Joel Miller tag list: @huffle-punk @johnwatsn @hopelessromantic727 @whereasport @pedr0swh0r3 @yellingloudly @dragon-of-winterfell @thedeadsingwithdirtintheirmouths @mydailyhyperfixations @liati2000 @ghostofjoharvelle @cutesyscreenname @morgaussy @letsgroovetonighttt @endlessthxxghts @fake-bleach @brilliantopposite187 @mattmurdock1021 @str84pedro

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[mediumgayitalian]

previous chapter

———

The sunlight disorients him.

Usually, he wakes to a blaring alarm. If he has no alarm set, nothing planned for the day, he wakes when he cannot physically stand the taste of his own breath anymore, stumbling out of bed and ambling like a zombie for the nearest toothbrush. (On rare, rare occasions, he wakes to humming – low, drawling, lilting, floating around his darkened room, brightening it. He dreams about those mornings.)

He cannot remember the last time he woke to gentle sun.

Stretching, he takes a minute to catalogue the space as he wakes up, noticing the light curtains over wide windows, small TV tucked in between two double beds, and a desk, larger than he would have expected, taking up the far right corner.

Will is nowhere to be found.

“Jogging, mebbe,” Nico mumbles to himself; tiny, forgotten accent slipping out before he can stop it. Gingerly, he peels off the blankets and pads to the bathroom. Will’s blue-capped toothbrush sits next to the sink, quelling Nico’s ridiculous anxiety that Will, actually, has never been here at all, and Nico dreamed this whole thing up. He smiles slightly at the dorky stickers plastered all over the handle, colour mostly worn away, and the watch forgotten next to the soap dispenser. 

He hears a heavy door open and shut, pausing to make out quiet footsteps over the running water. Quickly rinsing the suds off his face, he towels off and steps back out into the hotel room, watching his friend.

Will has his back turned, hunched over the desk. He wears a hoodie, blue with big white clouds all over it – his favourite – and, of course, horrible cargo shorts. Nico counts seven pockets, and that’s just what he can see from the back. There is a book shoved in two of them, keys hanging out of a third, and an apple bulging from the pocket near his hip.

“Morning.”

Will jumps, whirling around. 

“You scared the shit outta me!”

“Sorry,” Nico says, not sorry. He’s grinning. “Were you out for a run?”

“I was out for a run hours ago, yes. It’s, like, ten-thirty, dude. You’ve been sleeping for eight hundred years.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever.” They’ve had this argument more times than he can physically count, he refuses to have it again when he doesn’t have the upper hand. He’ll bring it up again when Will’s sleepy again at nine o’clock. “Where were you?”

Will steps to the side, revealing three separate heaping plates of food on the desk, piled high with eggs, toast, a muffin, bacon, and, of course, an entire plate devoted to fruit. Nico descends upon it like a swarm of seagulls upon a terrorized child’s ice cream cone – with fury, insatiable hunger, and endless hubris. He makes sure to ignore the fruit.

Five minutes later, he’s satiated enough to turn a percentage of his attention away from the food. He spins the desk chair halfway to face Will, instead, curled up on the bed with one knee pulled to his chest, watching him fondly.

“How many times did you almost drop this on the way up?” he asks around a mouthful of bacon.

Will’s smile drops, eyes narrowing. “Shut up.”

“Four floors, and there’s a good chance you took the stairs to keep the elevators for ‘someone who needs them more’, so –”

“I hate you.”

“– I’m guessing one time per flight of stairs? Oh, wait, there are three plates, definitely more –”

“I’m never doing anything nice for you ever again.”

“– and you have a new band-aid on your knee, so you definitely tripped and dropped it at least once.” He pops the last of the bacon in his mouth, smiling wickedly. “Twice? Three times? If you don’t tell me I’m going to assume six and move on.”

Will’s glare intensifies. He mumbles something.

“Hm?”

He mumbles again. Nico doesn’t even pretend not to be delighted. He knows the smile on his face is wide enough to make him look deranged, he simply doesn’t care. Opportunities to press Will’s buttons this beautiful do not show up every day. He must treasure them.

“Didn’t catch that.”

“Hadtogoback.”

“Gonna have to speak up, bud.”

“I had to go back!” Will explodes, hands thrown in the air. “I fuckin’ – I dropped the stupid plates, the first time, so I had to fuckin’ – clean it up and – two stupid trips, you jerk, you better appreciate this –”

Nico almost bites through his lip. “You dropped it?”

“I didn’t mean to!” Will says defensively. “I was concentrating really hard but –”

Nico loses it.

“– my shoe got caught on the last step and I didn’t have any hands to catch myself.” He scowls. “Three people saw.”

He can’t breathe. There are genuine, actual tears streaming down his face, burn in his eyes almost as bad as the burn in his lungs, the ache in his belly. He wraps his shaking arms around himself in an attempt to hold himself together, laughing so hard he feels like his muscles might actually rip themselves off his bones. Every time he tries to calm down, he pictures Will, in his dorky flip-flops, egg in his hair, half a muffin crushed on his cheek, bright red, sprawled on the ground, food everywhere. If he could think of literally anything else, he’d be worried about his heart straight-up failing. 

“I hate you. Actually.”

“I’m – oh my God,” he wheezes. He manages, finally, to get an actual breath in, desperately trying to think of literally anything else to calm down. Fucking – bumper to bumper traffic. Bedbugs. His father’s frowning face. That always works. “Holy shit, Will.”

“I should’ve just woken your ungrateful ass up.”

“Probably.” He flicks a grape at him, smiling. Will catches it in his mouth, rolling his eyes but smiling back. “Glad you didn’t.”

“Whatever.”

Nico finishes the rest of his breakfast in relative peace, managing to turn away if his mouth threatens to betray the tentative truce they’ve negotiated. He even eats one entire peach when Will starts pelting him with tiny hotel soap bottles and listing side effects of cholesterol-induced heart disease.

The second he finishes the last bite, Will orders him to clear off the desk. Nico mutters about bossiness and how Will is most definitely not in charge of him, doing as he asks. When he comes back – took him a hot second to shove the paper plates into a small enough ball to fit in the garbage can – Will has dragged the desk over to the bed, sitting criss-cross next to it, examining one of the many papers he has covering it.

“So,” he says, gesturing next to him. Nico dutifully sits, peering at the various maps and markings. “We gotta plan part two.”

“Didn’t we already do this?” Nico asks. “Back at Dunkin’s?”

“Not this far. I wanted to Preserve the Spontaneous Road Trip Spirit.” Nico can hear the capitalization.

“So, planning, then.”

“Yes, exactly.”

Nico smiles. “Brief me, captain.”

Will jumps right in, pointing and gesturing and every once and a while catching Nico’s eye to ask, right? Sound good?

Nico just watches him. 

The midday sun shines directly in his face, catching and reflecting on his pale eyelashes, making his eyes go squinty. His excitement is obvious, in his chattering, his waving hands, his bouncing curls; every part of him moving. Even his stupid cargo shorts look endearing, every other pocket bulging, filled absentmindedly with slips of paper or pens or bandaids or granola bars. Nico watches him and feels he might burst.

“You’re not listening,” Will accuses.

Nico jumps back into focus. “Yes I am.”

“What’d I just say?”

“‘You’re not listening’.”

WIll cracks a smile. “You’re not funny.”

“Run over that again,” Nico answers, and grins devilishly when Will does. Not funny his ass.

He listens, though, through Will’s second explanation. It’s not too hard – Will’s always been organised. The wide penciled circle around their location in Atlanta, outlining the area they can drive before their next fuel stop, is pretty wide. But the options are limited, in Nico’s opinion – while he’s sure there is indeed something to do in South Carolina, there’s nothing to do for him, specifically. He’s cool with skipping it.

“There is one place we can go,” Will says. His voice has gone oddly quiet, and after at minute he glances over at Nico, like he’s waiting for his permission.

“Your road trip, dude,” he murmurs, nudging their shoulders together. “I’ll even go to South Carolina if you want to, but no promises that I won’t complain about it.”

That, thankfully, draws a huff out of him, some of the tenseness fading from his frame. 

“South Carolina is beautiful, you know.”

“Says the boy who is currently visiting his third state ever.”

“...Touché.” He taps his pencil on the map, pink eraser thunking somewhere in the Bermuda triangle. “I was thinking – we could try Nashville? Music Row, or Broadway?”

Nico groans. “Oh, of course you wanna go hang out with all the goddamn hillbillies, you fuckin’ country boy –”

“It’s good music!”

Nico groans louder. Secretly, though, he watches his friend out of the corner of his eye, watches as his shoulders slump, relieved, and he knows he’ll spend as long as he needs in lasso-slingin’ Tennessee, following Will in and out of – barns and ranches and cowboy boot shops, probably. Are saloons still a thing?

He has a feeling that there is more to Will’s hesitance than a fear about being judged for his Marty Robbins obsession. If Tennessee is where he’s gonna get answers – well. He’ll brave the goddamn sea of cowboy hats.

A knock at the door startles them both. A voice calls hesitantly through the door: “Mr. di Angelo?”

“Wrong door, probably,” Will whispers after a moment. He looks to Nico. “Right?”

There’s another knock. “Mr. di Angelo?” 

“Yeah.” Nico rolls of the bed, landing on the floor with a grunt. “Another room with a Mr. di Angelo.”

He creeps towards the door, keeping low as if whoever’s outside can see him. After a moment, the bed creaks, and Will’s quiet footsteps pad behind him. 

“You think it’s room service?” Will whispers, plastered to the opposite side of the door. Even ducking, his hair brushes the edge of the peephole. 

Nico shoves his head down, pinching him when he squawks. “Be quiet, tall person, I need to see.”

“Get a stepstool then, jerk! Stop using my neck as a lever!”

“What part of be quiet are you missing! God!”

“Mr. di Angelo, please open the door.”

The voice on the other side of the door sounds amused. Face flaming, Nico shoves Will somewhere behind him, still bitching, and swings open the door. 

“Good afternoon,” says the man in the hallway. He’s dressed very smartly in a tailored black suit, nametag reading Eric. “Are you Mr. di Angelo?”

Nico clears his throat, trying to stand taller. “That’s me.”

“Good. I’m with Hotel Administration. We received a fax for you this morning?” He hands Nico a manilla folder. “First page says confidential, so we put it in the envelope. We tried to call this morning but didn’t get any response.”

Vaguely, Nico remembers a ringing phone. He also remembers yanking the plug out of the wall in sleep-deprived rage.

Oops.

Ignoring Will’s snickering, Nico thanks the man, closing the door and sitting on the nearest bed. Will scooches over to make room for him, tossing and catching a pillow. Nico leans back against the headboard, crossing his leg over Will’s.

“What’s in the envelope?”

“Checking now.”

The envelope is the cheap kind you get in a box of fifty; speckled brown, thin, machine-cut. It’s not sealed and so Nico flips it open easily, sliding out a small stack of papers. The first is a huge CONFIDENTIAL, printed diagonally across otherwise blank paper. The second is a bank statement. 

Nico shoots upright.

“What? Nico, what’s –”

“Mr. di Angelo, we regret to lose your business,’” Nico recites in a shaking voice, “‘but appreciate your time with us and wish you all the best with your future banking.’”

Frantically, he scans the document again. Successful cancellation. Expedited closure date. Transferred affairs to –

– parent account. 

“–co? Nico? Can you please tell me what’s going on?”

The air pushes out of Nico’s lungs like a crushed balloon. “Fuck.”

“Nico.” Warm hands press on his bloodless cheeks, fingers sliding in his hair. “Nico, look at me.”

He gasps. Will squeezes gently, eyes dark and stern and kind, thumbs callus-rough and dragging across his cheekbones.

“Good. Again. There you go, you got it.” 

Nico grabs his wrists when he tries to pull away. Will takes the hint, sliding his hands under Nico’s free one and knocking their shoulders together.

“What’s wrong, Nico?” 

Instead of answering, Nico sets the papers on the bed between them. Will squints, and for a second Nico prays that he’s wrong, that he’s mixed up the words. That it doesn’t say what it knows it does.

Then Will inhales, quick and sharp, and the hope is dashed.

“Your card…”

“Next page,” Nico says softly.

Niccolò,

The papers rustle as Will flips them, and this one he takes much longer to read. 

Vorrei sapere che ho fermato un caso di frode alla radice.

After a minute, he holds it out, shaking his head.

Un criminale ha rubato la tua carta di credito, e l’ha usata per comprare una stanza d’albergo in Georgia. Qualche spacciatore, non ci sono dubbi.

“It’s a little formal, I can’t –”

Ho disattivato la carta, naturalmente. Ti darò quella nuova appena ti vedrò.

Nico takes the scanned letter. Vaguely, he registers Will’s hands brushing up his arms as they move two wrap around his face again, this time forcing his jaw to unclench.

“Power play,” Nico snarls. His clenched fingers wrinkle the pulpy paper.  “He knows exactly where I am. If he wanted to drag me home, he could drag me by the fucking –”

“But instead he’s forcing you to call him,” Will says softly. “Oh, Nico, I’m so sorry.”

The hands drop from his face again. It knocks the cloudiness right out of Nico’s head, and he snaps up, frowning at Will’s crooking fingers, the bitten lips. He won’t meet Nico’s eyes.

“Why are you sorry my father’s being a haughty jackass who suddenly cares what I do with my time?”

“And his money.” Will picks up the bank statement, reading over it again, and again, like it might change. Like Nico’s credit card will magically become un-cancelled, like they will suddenly become un-stranded. “This whole stupid thing is my fault. I never should have dragged you into it, Neeks, I’m so –”

“If you apologise again I’m going to push you off the bed.”

“– sorry.” 

“Will.” Nico snatches back the statement, shaking his head. He waits until blue eyes meet his then smiles, as reassuringly as he can with such a pit in his stomach. “My father is –” He sighs. “It’s not about the money. You know he doesn’t care about the money.”

Will shrugs. It’s true – Nico has made dumber purchases. When he was twelve, he bought a trampoline, just to see if his father would say anything. Fifteen, marble statue. Sixteen, a car.

Then he stopped trying.

“How far can we go, on the gas we have? How many miles?”

Will shrugs. “Three and a half hours? Four, if we push it?”

“And on a full tank of gas?”

“Almost six.”

“And then we’re stuck.”

“And then we’re stuck, yeah. Unless you got Greyhound money hidden somewhere.”

Nico sighs, dragging a hand down his face. “That’s what he wants, Will. He doesn’t care about the – about the stupid money. He wants me. He wants me to ask, rather, to pick up a phone and beg him to come get us ‘cause we have no other options. He wants me to admit I need his help.”

The first time he ran away, he’d had to avoid every cop car. He knew he was being looked for, he saw his own face plastered on news screens. It had only been a matter of time. The second attempt was – easier. Much easier. He’d hardly even had to hide his face. By the third time, he’d waited a week, waited almost a month, before he was cold and hungry and walked to the nearest social services building himself. The car ride home, the humiliation so potent he could taste the bitterness of it, had made the cold, rainy nights with nothing but the same ratty hoodie he’d worn when he left worth it. He swore he’d never subject himself to that again. 

And yet here he is. 

Out of options. 

“You know what? No.��� In a swift, unstoppable movement, Will snatches the stack of papers, ripping them into four pieces faster than Nico can reach an arm out to stop him. “We’re not doing this.”

“Will – what –”

He throws himself off the bed, stomping over to his backpack. A folded pair of socks goes flying over his shoulder, a book hits the ground with a heavy thunk. His muttering grows louder, cursing interspersed between every word.

“What are you –”

“We are not dealing with this right now.” With a frustrated finally, Will yanks a bag of something out of his backpack, stomping back towards the bed. He throws a Ziploc bag onto the duvet, and it bounces once, twice, three times before splitting open and spilling quarters everywhere.

“What the hell is –”

“You already payed for the room, right?”

Nico snaps his jaw shut. “Yes.”

“And it’s Saturday.”

“I – it is, yeah.”

“Not a business day.”

“No.”

“Well.” Will nods. “Bank’s closed. Hotel can’t process anything, and they have no reason to suspect your card, which worked just fine last night, is gonna bounce. We’ve got a day of breathing room, at least, and I don’t want to think about it.”

He holds up a hand when Nico starts to argue, grim set to his mouth giving way to something a little sharper, a little more dangerous. 

“We might not be old enough to gamble, but when you’re in Atlanta, you do as the Atlantians do.” He meets Nico’s eye, grinning. “You still any good Street Fighters?”

———

next chapter

[krirebr]

the softest thought 🥺💕 ransom doing his best to make you bread pudding despite his first attempt resulting milky bread and scrambled eggs 😭 and he brings it to you on a little wooden tray with a fancy spoon and everything bc he's practically turning into a high strung housewife the longer he's with you

bone apple teeth!! jk im sure he speaks french

Uggggggggghhhhhhhhhh, Brandy!!! The feelings!!

And he knows how hard everything's been lately, so when he brings it to where you're zoned out on the couch, you immediately burst into tears.

"Fuck," he says. "Is it that bad??" And he's clearly starting to close off, even as you're looking at him, shaking your head.

"No," you say, emphatically through your tears. "It's my favorite! And you made it for me! Because you love me!" And everything comes out garbled because you're crying so hard, and he's staring at you like you've grown an extra head. "And I love you so much!" you continue, making grabby hands at him until he sits down next to you. "Because you do shit like this!"

He settles into the couch, and you press yourself into his soft sweater, still crying, but now you're eating too. "Ok," he says slowly, still clearly confused. "So the bread pudding is good? You like it??"

[fandomworld9728]

The Life of the Morningstars - Chapter 12:

"Dad! It's time to get up!" Knocking on the door, Charlie was starting to get worried. He hadn't answered any of her calls or texts to come join them for breakfast. She even made their favorite type of pancakes as a nice little welcome treat. "Dad? I'm coming in!" 

Taking out her master key, the princess let herself in and quickly covered her nose at the strong smell that had filled the room. The smell of overripe and sour apples along with burnt honey so strong it gagged her. Quickly closing and locking the door, Charlie went to open the window to air it out only to stop. What if the smell drew people to the hotel to try and find out who it was coming from?

No. She wasn't going to mess up again. What did she do or let happen that cause this sort of reaction from her dad? And how was she going to air this place out safely?

Sitting up in bed, Lucifer looked around the room trying to wake up and focus. "Charlie...?

"Oh, thank fuck!" Rushing over to him, she sat on the edge of the bed before pushing some hair out of his face. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I think... I think I was wrong. A scent set me off. Luckily, it didn't trigger my heat. I'm sorry I made you worry. I thought for sure..." He was usually more careful than this. Now his gross and soured scent was probably leaking out of the room. This is why he preferred to live alone. So that he couldn't fuck up like this and bring trouble to his darling daughter.

"No! No, I'm sorry. I should have put my foot down and paid better attention. I-I... I'm not as good of an alpha as I thought..."

"Charlotte Annette Morningstar! Don't you ever say that about yourself again. I am so proud of the alpha you have grown into. You just haven't had a proper teacher seeing as your mother didn't want to teach you and left us... and as much as we love Beel and Ozzie, and their nontraditional view on second genders, that didn't really work in your favor for the basics of omega care."

Lucifer felt like he failed her as a parent. There weren't many omegas here in Hell. Not even among the Hellborn. Not to mention, as far as he knew, Lucifer himself had been the only omega angel in Heaven. That could have changed while he was gone but that meant he also wasn't taught about his own biological make up. The ones who would have the most information on this would be the sinners.

"Okay, here's what we're going to do. You head on down to breakfast while I air out my room. I'll come down and join you when I'm done. After, you will find a proper alpha teacher. I recommend a sinner you trust."

~

Lucifer hadn't expected this kind of reaction. After he had used his wings and a portal to air out his bedroom, he came down to join everyone for breakfast only to find everyone but Charlie looking like they were either high or drunk. When asking his darling daughter about it, she was just as surprised as he was but figured it had to do with his scent rushing out when she had opened his door earlier.

Since she grew up around it, it didn't affect her unless she was emotionally distressed. Even Alastor, the creepy bastard, was relaxed in his chair. Lucifer wasn't sure if he should be flattered or uncomfortable.

"Hey there toots~ What uh... what is that amazing smell?" Angel asked, laying boneless on the floor. "I ain't never felt this good before."

"Oh! Uh... w-well..."

"Yeah. Don't keep it a secret. I feel like I got buzzed off the best high shelf shit in all of Hell." Husk had his upper body draped over the bar, looking like he was on the verge of passing out. Unlike Vaggie who actually was passed out. At least she looked comfortable. The egg bois of Sir Pentious' were huddled around her.

Speaking of the snake. He didn't seem to be here. Though, the sounds coming from the kitchen gave away his location. Did... did Lucifer's scent make him hungry? That was a new one.

The only one who didn't seem effected by it at all was Niffty. Which made sense seeing as she was a beta. Seems like she might end up being Lucifer's saving grace when he couldn't control his scent, as much as that freaked him out. Maybe he shouldn't have brought up saving graces... every time he did, the world had to screw him over. Case in point, Alastor opening his mouth and making it so he had to go and change pants.

"Yes, Charlie. What is that smell? It is utterly delicious."

Oh. Lucifer was so screwed. Maybe he needed a vacation to the Lust or Greed Ring. Hell, he'll even visit Wrath at this point!

< Previous

Next >

[phen397]

Sonic adventure 2 but told through notes I took while playing part2 electric Boogaloo

OK here we go again

Tails in the Chao garden is too cute

Love the way his tails sway and flop on the ground

Feed the children all the tubes

Only one though

He will be the most drugged up Chao at the races

OK

Time to leave

Sonic in jail

Amy from the sky

Have no fear Amy rose is here

How did she get that key card

"That black hedgehog"? Amy please come see me after class

Marry me if I tell?

Did sonic write the stuff in the walls

Nah he too dumb for all that math

Who built these ramps and loops in the middle of the ocean?

Guess gun did since their name is on everything

Thanks omachao I didn't know how to do a homing attack

Cuccked by a bot phasing put of existence

Can I just not hit ghost bot?

No omachao I haven't tried using the light dash I don't even have that yet

Oh hey light dash shoes

Go fast on rings

Lots of peacocks in this level

The seal is so cute look at him

Rocket time

Bigger rocket

I gotta ride it!?

Oh snap

To space baby

Oh God he jumped

Where did this stuff come from

Snowboard down tube to goal

Sonic seems to like taking panels off of gun's stuff

I am sure they aren't important

New gate in Chao space

The kindergarten

I am going to go get apple sauce and have a nap

Oh it seems to be empty

Little drawings of chaos on the walls

Wonder if these where drawn by fans

Chao bulletin board

What browser?

Different doors for things

Can't do anything cause I didn't bring a Chao

I am a teen just wandering around a kindergarten

Not weird at all

Let me talk to the principal

Lots to say

Now how do I get my Chao here?

Poor all the animals and tubes into one Chao

What could go wrong?

Maybe if I pick up a Chao and leave I can take him to the kindergarten

Nope

Next level time

In the forest

So far so good

Hi shadow I mean faker

Not even good enough to be my fake

"I'LL MAKE YOU EAT THOSE WORDS" damn sonic let the man finish

Time to fight shadow

Did he just say he is the coolest?

Shit I fell

Wait for him to land after his attack then hit him

Do you even know who I am

Green forest

Yes

Yes it is

Close your mouth shadow please

Island gonna blow up

Soundtrack picking up for this epic race against death

Oh yea Amy and tails are here too I guess

8 minutes till boom

Epic vine swings

Love my naturally growing springs

Level done

More tubes for the child

Let's see how the child has grown

Race time

Mushroom forest this time round

Look at my child go

Not dead last so doing good

Ha some tripped

Cheer em on

3rd place thanks to a trip right at the end

Try again?!

So I need to win huh?

Fine I will be back

Island blowing up cutscene

Plane flies away

Pumpkin hill

Getting jiggy with it

Place feels haunted

Knuckles time

Shovel claws

I can dig now

I can dig up Graves

Ghosts not happy

This place feels familiar

How train why train?

Found all 3

Eggman psa

Creepy child

Eggman empire

Egg face in space

The ark

Laser beam

NOT THE MOON

24 hours

Gang saw it all

How did he get all that energy

Chaos emerald

Talis has one just cause

I am sure you saying something important tails but I can't hear you over the sound of your theme song blasting my eardrums out

Oh shoot the popo

Yes Amy you are an accomplis now

No backing out now

Ah yes mission Street

Right next to objective lane

If you hit side quest ally you went to far

Tails level

Gonna get so many tubes

Boosters

Fly high?

More like hover mid

Okay

Okay

Okay

Okay

Okay

Thanks tails

More tubes for the child

All for now But next time I don't know maybe the child attends class or smth idfk

[isa-ghost]

Not a question but bringing up the Golden Apple addiction in your fic is so based of you!! That shit is soooo interesting to me, it’s rarely brought up, and it works unbelievably well with Philza and the Enderking!

If you have any details to add about that, I’d be happy to hear.

Dude it wasn't originally intended and then I got to a point in my plan and was like ....OH MY GOD??

Because like

And I think I said this somewhere already but idr

Phil's body may be immortal, but it's not built to house a god. Especially not for long periods of time. And bro is gonna be possessed for like a whole ass week.

Ender King, an entity that generally doesn't need to eat, is gonna start pounding down gapples like his life depends on it purely to keep Phil's body functioning the bare minimum bc the longer he's possessing it, the more it's gonna be falling apart. He only needs it temporarily for his plan, so he's gotta put at least a shred of effort in keeping his vessel going while he still needs it. =)

And the polycule, Bagi, AND the eggs will see what horrid condition Phil's body will be in at one point or another. <3

[mishafletcher]

i wrote a book called cooking is terrible, which you can buy on amazon, or at any of the retailers here, or pretty much anywhere you can buy books.

the main post was getting pretty long, and the faq was also pretty long, but people often ask what kinds of recipes are in it, so here are some example recipes!

butter bean salad

Rinse and drain a tin of butter beans. Add crumbled feta and capers. Dress with lemon juice, olive oil, and a little bit of mustard.

Variations: Add quartered marinated artichoke hearts. Add chopped red onion. Add fresh chopped parsley, or fresh or dried thyme. Add sumac to the dressing. (If you do all these things, you have a main course salad that is fancy enough to serve at a party, or to grudgingly take to the work potluck.)

Keeps in the fridge for three to five days.

shitty soup

This soup isn’t actually shitty—it’s actually nice, and I eat it a lot—but we started calling it shitty soup, and the name’s stuck.

Bring enough stock for one person to a boil.

Add about 2 Tbsp of pastina. When the pasta is nearly done (which is only like, two minutes), crack in an egg and turn the pot to a simmer. After about two minutes of simmering, add some sort of veggie—shredded carrots, fresh or frozen spinach, frozen peas—and let it cook for another minute or two. Tada! You’ve made soup.

You can change this up, and don’t have to include all three bits—pasta and a few veggies, or just an egg boiled in stock, is great, and totally a meal. I give all three components mainly so there’s a note about timing. There are a million variations on this—add tomato paste or sesame oil, add other veggies, cook the egg to different degrees of doneness, etc. You can add a little cheese at the end, or a handful of (rinsed) tinned beans, or shreds of previously cooked meat. But at its most basic, broth + something else = soup, which is a meal that you can totally manage to make for yourself in under ten minutes, and then you can smugly tell the internet that you’re sure that what they’re having is nice and all, but you’re having homemade soup. And let’s be honest—most nights, this soup is not good enough to justify that, but who cares. Sometimes you gotta take what you can get.

things you can put on top of cottage cheese or yogurt to make them feel more like an interesting meal

this is just a list of ideas. the things in parentheses are optional extras, though you can use—or not use—whatever you'd like.

Peach or pineapple chunks

Jam

Pumpkin or apple butter

Berries

Cantaloupe/rockmelon

Granola or muesli

Apples, cinnamon, and honey

Literally just honey

Cinnamon sugar

Sunflower seeds + raisins + shredded cheese

Chili powder + black beans + avocado

Chopped tomatoes + garlic (+ spinach) (+ steak seasoning)

Cut-up spinach and chopped green onions (+ tomatoes)

Sundried tomatoes and olives

Chopped cucumber and olives (+ za’atar)

Salsa or hot sauce

Chopped radish, ready cooked beets, or cucumber + dill (+ garlic)

Mix in a bunch of Milo, Nesquick, or other sweetened chocolate powder. (You might want to add a splash of milk.)

Mangos + cardamom (+ honey or other sweetener) (+ pistachios)

Balsamic vinegar (+ strawberries if you wanna get fancy)

Basically any fresh herbs you have + salt

A spoonful of nut butter (+ chocolate)

Dried meat (like pork or mushroom floss, or that weird shredded jerky) + green onion

if you think all this sounds terrible, that's cool—this is not the cookbook for you.

if you're like, 'oh shit, i could make that soup in less than fifteen minutes,' maybe pick up a copy.

[tiredly101]

Cute villain

Pairing: Wally Darling x Villain!Male reader

Illustrated Au, this post was adopted from another account because they are deleting it soo I adopted it with permission of the original author, I did make some changes to adapt it to my writing style! Picture belongs to @eechytooru

In all fairness, having the Wally Darling steal M/n's heart was definitely not part of his plan to cause mayhem in the sweet neighbourhood. It was supposed to be a perfect plan, down to the very last step everything had been thought and analysed on how you were going to make a mess of the bright and cheery village. He'd change directions of sign posts sending people to the wrong places, swap envelopes so people would get the wrong mail, put snail on their plants and replace the stores fruit with fake fruit.

At first it was going well, Barnaby was wondering around completely lost wondering why the sign to the shop ended up pointing him toward the complete other side of the village or why Julie was getting bug magazines and not hair ones in her mail and why Poppys beautiful flower beds were being devoured by hungry snails.

This was all so amusing for M/n until he felt a tap on his shoulder from behind him in his little hiding spot in the trees. Because M/n was busted he jumped a little, letting out a little squeak when he turned to see none other than Wally Darling staring into his eyes with a unrecognisable look.

Only once he held out one of M/n's fake apples with a giant gap of it missing you realised he bit into one, well sort of? Maybe he blinked into one? He eats with his eyes, which although was kinda weird to M/n he also found it kinda cool but the it dawned on him that Wally wasn’t very happy about his apples being tampered with.

Although this was M/n's plan all along he can’t help but feel guilty but suddenly guilt is the last thing he feel when Wally tips his head up and stares into M/n's eyes which made him melt in Wally's hands. For a split second it makes M/n uncomfortable, did he make Wally that mad? But then Wally lets out a smile and his grin widens which manages to confuse M/n completely.

“You’re so so silly M/n, I do enjoy watching you do your little pranks but next time please leave my apples out of it," Wally said softly and then he chuckles softly when you tumble over your apology and he pulls you into a tight hug.

“Haha! Look at you, your as red as a apple! Maybe I should eat you instead to make up for this one,” M/n was going back and forth from flustered to being confused and the a tad scared. Could he actually eat him tho? He technically would just have to blink, it wouldn’t be hard in M/n's perspective. Wally sees M/n's panicked expression and so he pats his head softly and gives M/n a friendly smile.

“Bye bye neighbour, I hope to see you around more," said Wally before walking off back to Home leaving the fake apple in your hand. Sort of dazed M/n just stand there for a little. M/n was supposed to bring chaos and not suffer it chaos himself.

What left M/n a blushing mess was how just a few little words from Wally and he made could make steam blast out his ears. M/n was sure his face was so warm that it could fry a egg and yet he started to feel bad. Wally was always so nice and kind to M/n no matter what cunning tricks or prank M/n played on him.

He felt guilty, he denied it tho because that little village being all cheerful and bright annoys him beyond explanation and that includes Wally which means he can't be an exception…

And yet, Wally Darling... he was so warm and kind, he reminded M/n of the pleasant soft sun of a evening, not to harsh and intense but just enough to be perfect.

"Aw shit," said M/n softly admitting to himself that he couldn't deny it anymore, he was absolutely smitten over Wally which was embarrassing in his perspective, there’s no way on earth he could face the guy again.

Unknown to M/n's very obvious subtle gay panic, the village people are huddled in tight trying to figure out how to stop his antics.

“This has gone on long enough! The mayhem he is causing is not ment for Welcome Home," exclaimed Frank while frowning.

“He’s right, it’s just unacceptable... We have to kick him out of the neighbour,” Poppy said anxiously while grasping a bunch of half eaten flowers.

As this discussion continued didn't input a word. He himself was thinking about how cute M/n looked when he caught him red handed, all on edge like a little bunny perked up when the sound of someone being near. Personally he knew your pranks would go to far sometimes but couldn’t bring himself to care, it was always a excuse to see him! So this discussion meant little to him until he heard something he didn't like.

“Well! We’ll need to set a date to be rid of him! Perhaps tomorrow or the day after...,” Sally exclaimed while everyone nodded in approval. "A date? A date… yes, yes! That’s what he’ll do," was what Wally thought before getting up happily catching everyone's attention.

“A date.. yes, your right Sally. I’ll ask him on a date!,” Wally said happily and the way the villagers heads turned so quick, he could almost hear the wind from the force of it.

“Wait- Wait, Wally not THAT kind of date! I think your confused?,” Barnaby tried to explain before Wally interrupted with a cherry smile and soft blush.

“No no, I’m sure of it. I must ask him on a date!,” said Wally and without another second he was dashing off back to Home leaving not a single explanation to the other villagers to write a love letter.

After spending hours rewording what to say and adding cute little drawings Home finally shoved Wally out, forcing him to confess by locking him out and this lead to him walking around swiftly, full of excitement until he found M/n resting so peacefully under a tree. He wasn’t sure if he had the heart to wake you since you looked so cute but he knew he couldn’t back down now, mostly because if he did it would end with him leaving on the streets for at least a week.

Carefully sitting beside M/n he gently nudged him until he showed signs of waking up, M/n's sleepy expression made it hard for Wally to not squeeze M/n's cute cheeks and pepper his face with little kisses but now was not the time.

“Good morning M/n,” said Wally softly while looking how M/n tried to adjust his eyes to the light.

“Oh! Uh Wally, good morning? What are you doing here?," Asked M/n shyly while looking at Wally thorough half lidded eyes. If M/n wasn't so disoriented from just waking he would probably scream of embarrassment. Waiting for Wally reply ended with him grasping you hand and placed the letter in it, encouraging him to read it now.

He could see M/n's beautiful eyes dart across the page re-reading it over and over again the same word just making sure that he wasn't dreaming. Until Wally touched M/n softly which made him jump a little. M/n looked at him with a shocked and flushed face which made Wally wish he could keep this moment forever ingrained in his mind, maybe he would paint it to keep the memory but snapping out of his thoughts he realised M/n was yet to reply.

M/n was simply in awe and just didn’t quite believe it until Wallys yellow cheeks started to turn light pink realizing that he was blushing. M/n didn’t even know he could do that... it was a very cute sight and without thinking he held Wally pink dusted cheek in his hand. Wally quickly melted into M/n's touch while placing his soft hand on his that was positioned on his face, and he just stared at M/n and admired him.

Any fear of rejection melted away as he watched M/n fighting to hide back a huge grin and almost jumped into him incasing him into a big hug.

“Does this mean you feel the same way?,” Wally questioned while he chuckled, hugging you back after going limp for a couple seconds.

“Oh Wally, all that and more,” M/n said, nuzzling deeper into Wally's welcoming embrace. Maybe, just maybe he could hold fire on the pranks for now, after all it looks as if M/n has more important things in his schedule for now...

"Better said a more important someone"

[loderlied]

i think with my recent mosquito debacle (one of the first bite(s) i have gotten in literal years because i am extremely careful btw lol) and general hypochondria i’m being more open about having on here you can really tell that while gortash/gortash & zeke is like. the main thing in this regard, i truly do often write what i’m terrified of with characters like oleander ‘apple bringing sin and evil to mankind personified turning a dignified crusader army into a band of sick violent monsters in a few years and who has so many maggots living in a wound somewhere on his body at any given time & secretly feeds those armies fucked up parasite eggs/other shit of that nature & his own and others flesh’ pathfinder wrath of the righteous too lmao. like the top 3 blorbos ranked on how fast i’d kill myself if i had to be around them are:

gortash

oleander

zeke

[imlivinginyourtrashcan]

Hi hello im a dirty American heres some friendsgiving headcannons for the sp character

Cartman:

That man aint bringing shit

Only there for the food

The type of mf to steal ingrediants while youre cooking something

Dives RIGHT for the pumpkin pie

Nobody is happy

He denies it but its do obvious hes stealing shit 🤬

Does not wait for a toast

Bro just dives in

Getting seconds, thirds, fourths

When hes done theres no left overs

If he were to bring something id be pie

His moms recipe

BUT THIS LITTLE FUCK EATS IT IN THE CAR

Kyle:

Sometimes hosts the friendsgiving at his house

Brings the sparkling grape juice/apple juice

And also the Kosher things

Only has one helping, tries to get leftovers for the family or for kenny

Helps his mom cook when hes hosting

Setting the table always

Tries to toast but ends up yelling at Cartman for eating before hes done

Helps Ike pack for those little kindergarten thanksgivings?

Yknow when you dressed as a pilgrim and ate food?

Was I the only one who did that??

Stan:

He panicks and brings what he can find

"Hey dude! What you bring?"

"Uhhh... leftover mash potatos?"

Hes TRYING

Downing the sparkling juices like no tomorrow

The eggnog too

Cartman encourages it

"CHUG CHUG CHUG"

Watching the football game

RESTRAINS himself when it comes to food

Like, he wants it but knows Kyles gonna be pissed

Plays catch with everyone else

Or pingpong

Doesnt give a fuck about the Macys parade

Kenny:

Brings canned stuff he got from the food drive

Like cranberry sauce

Sneaking leftovers for his family

Plays catch with the boys

Died from a football lodged in his eye

Oh and from the

"Macys parade"

Incident

You dont want to know

Butters:

Brings the sweet potatos

Suggest christmas music/movies be played

Cartman called him gay immediately

So that got shut down

Brings the extra pies and everything since Cartman eats his

Lover of cranberry sauce and other things most people hate on thanksgiving

"Oh that was good! Could I have more please?"

"Butters what the fuck who likes CRANBERRY SAUCE???"

"I do!"

Doer of the toast

Often gets hit in the face when they play catch and cries

Can't stay for long cuz his parents are strict but hes there on video call rest of the time

Craig:

The type of mf when you ask what he brought he says

"My presence"

MF-

No!!!

You need to bring FOOD

They have to kick him out

He comes back with bread rolls or crackers, cheese and olives

So hes aloud back in

Doesnt care abt the parades or catch or anything

Just kinda there for Tweek

If someone asks him to do sonething he'll do it though

Hes limited by meals thanks to his braces

He doesnt care

Thats future craigs problem

Flips someone off if they beat him in a sport

Or flips off the tv when someone does something stupid in football

Has restraint when it comes to food

Bro will just wait

Wait

Wait

Wait

And then devour his plate in seconds

Tweek:

Brings homemade cider or pumpkin spice

Panicked the whole time

Hiding upstairs half the time

At least until food

He looks like a sopping wet cat

Doesnt really eat that much

Convinced the food is poison

Dont try to reassure him either he doesnt trust you

Has to check a million times though

"Is this poison???"

"No???"

"GAHH!! I dont believe you!!"

Leaves after feasting

He can only handle so much

Arrives super late too which is ironic

Jimmy:

Brings the food over and makes a puns

Like puts devil horns on eggs

"Jimmy what is that?"

"D-d-d-deviled Eggs"

Bro is telling thanksgiving jokes every second

Does the toast some years

Its like a stand up comedy routine tho

He lets you eat during that

Sneaking food

Mischievous little bastard

Puts on family fued when he realizes the boys are too pissed at football

Also has brace limits

But does he follow them ever? Nope

Drinks sparkling juice from a wine glass

Able to keep the party going for a WHILE he has ENERGY

Card playing KING

Winning at Crazy 8s left and RRRRIGHTTTTTT

Clyde:

Brought mac and cheese

Either that or bread

Food sneaker

Thinks hes good at sports

Hes not

He gets hit in the face so often

And cries

Tried Tweeks coffee

Started coughing and gagging immediately

Hes a picky eater im calling it now

Like will not eat if he doesnt think he'll like it

Me too Clyde i get it

Likes the Macys parade

Fucking weirdass

Arrives a bit before Tweek but is still late

The mf to get seconds

Wont eat before the event either

Saving his stomach for yum yums

Tolkien:

Also hosts

Helps his parents with food

Makes the dinner table look like a whole buffet

When hes not hosting he brings stuffing or some expensive good food

Or like

Homemade dip?

Casserole?

Idk

Seems like itd change every year

Great at sports

Helps clean up too

Toasts sometimes

Very generic toast

Doesnt seem like someone who has much to say