#“here's what this would look like if producers were credited as lead artists”
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echoeyee · 7 months ago
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every once in a while a regular ass song with regular human vocals gets enough vocal synth covers to be added to vocadb, and it really puts into perspective just how differently producers are talked about in the vocaloid scene vs 99% of other music. imagine if every song was listed on spotify and shit like this
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seoul-bros · 5 months ago
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Muse - an exploration of love
It now seems clear that Face and Muse were recorded in parallel, overlapping and intertwining. It's a situation which creates a thread of connection between the two albums.
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It's largely the same production team as FACE with Jimin again participating in writing most of the tracks on the album. He has also turned his hand to producing on Rebirth and Interlude: Showtime.
Track 1: Rebirth
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The first track seems connected to and leading on naturally from Set Me Free Part 2. Thinking back to the end of the MV where Jimin's clothes change from black to white, from leather to softer materials and his gaze is at last peaceful and penetrating, it all seeks to communicate release, reemergence and renewal.
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Rebirth therefore is the moment beyond, when Jimin determines to embrace life and love again. It could be a declaration of intent to start telling the story of Muse.
Track 2: Interlude: Showtime
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Which would make Showtime, the first step to embracing that new found freedom. It's an Interlude sure, but I keep getting a very theatrical image in my head, very bold, very Cabaret (if you're in London, I recommend you see the show).
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Track 3: Smeraldo Garden Marching Band (feat. Loco)
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We will get to hear Smeraldo Garden Marching Band in less than a week (aggggghhhhhhhh i'm not ready ......but at the same time so so ready). The track description says it "draws inspiration from a marching band, blending hip-hop elements with the big band sound characterized by a large-scale orchestra, creating an upbeat, lively rhythm and dynamic atmosphere." This gives me a stepping up, stepping out kind of feel.
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Given the focus on The Beatles and St Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band during Face era and the involvement of Nick Lee in Set Me Free Part 2, I'm expecting more big brass and a full sound which Jimin seems to be drawn to - brass and choirs all the way baby.
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I'd also expect to see some choreography here something like On but that might be asking too much.
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South Korean rapper Loco is the featured artist. Looking through his back catalogue one of his most successful songs featured RM's long time collaborator Colde. It'll be interesting to see how their voices and styles combine here.
Track 4: Slow Dance (feat. Sofia Carson)
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With Slow Dance, the seduction really begins. Arcades are Matt Thomson and Max Lynedoch Graham, a British electronic music production duo who we saw in the studio with Jimin in 2022 along with Gabriel Brandes and Alex Karlsson. Now we know what they were doing there.
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Also involved in this one is Like Crazy co-writer BLVSH. Oh yes this bodes very well for this track.
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So we're thinking EDM, maybe with a Latin feel. Sofia Carson has a unique voice which I think will pair well with Jimin and she has also been known to sing in Spanish and we know after SoWooZoo that Jimin is not adverse to that.
Track 5: Be Mine
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Be Mine is still a bit of a mystery to me, given its placement on the album it would suggest that Jimin has found the objective of his affections and wants to solidify the attraction into something more. Will it be a ballad? The production is giving no clues and I haven't seen any credits yet. However, some eagle eyes on TwiX spotted a Be Mine reference from ID: Chaos.
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Track 6: Who
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This is the main track and the production team includes Jon Beillon who worked on last year's summer smash Seven so we can expect some focus on elements for commercial success.
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There are more echos of ID:Chaos with he colour scheme for Who matching that from the Freedom shoot. It would be nice to think that Who reflects that particular sentiment i.e. this is who I am and knowing this has set me free to live and love as I choose.
Track 7: Closer Than This
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We round out with Closer Than This which given its position on the album and the way it was previously released solidifies the message, this is me until we meet again. Our love is strong enough to weather the storm of this enforced separation. It is a message for the fans but also for the BTS members.
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Post Date: 21/06/2024
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roo-bastmoon · 2 years ago
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The Long Game
First, let's acknowledge some major mismanagement by BigHit. Then, let's talk about what I think *might possibly* be their long game.
These are just guesses I have right now--I'm not stating facts and my opinions are subject to change as new info becomes available. But come with me for a few minutes...
In early 2022, Jimin's mail was "omitted" four times by BigHit employees, which lead to late insurance premium payments, which led to an on-paper "seizure" of his apartment. The press sat on that news for three months until the day his With You OST dropped and the scandal overshadowed his release. Jimin went to ground, avoided all social media for months. At this time, Jimin's personal information was leaked on the internet, and that was the last time we saw Jikook hang out alone that we know of.
Now in 2023, since Jimin's album FACE dropped, we already know about the sabotaged sales and streams by Hanteo, Billboard, YouTube, and Spotify. There was the issue with his in-ears not working properly during an encore. On top of all that drama, BigHit didn't get all the physicals shipped in time, they didn't playlist his songs for several days, they never sent his songs to radio (that we can see), they made one tweet to acknowledge Jimin's #1 on Hot100 but nothing else--not even a cake like the other solo albums got, they didn't let him film more than two music videos when they did that for their new groups, the press releases about their stocks going up after Hot100 also credited their new groups, and Jimin only had 9 days of uninterrupted promo between other members' works.
Now I am not a conspiracy theorist. I well understand that the military enlistment compressed schedules, and that each member had say in their creative works and promotions. I'm not a manti. But none of the above is a good look. Add up all those fumbles together, and you could make a solid case for mismanagement.
And now today, we see PD Bang on the cover of Billboard (which, OF COURSE, mentioned Blackpink in the same breath).
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JUST LOOK AT THE WAY THE STORY IS BEING SHAPED FOR AMERICAN READERS. You see what's happening here? You think SM is gonna get a cover story for their side of the corporate shakedown?
And then there's this little gem:
"If your question is about the possibility of creating an artist like BTS again, the answer is no. However, if you were to ask whether there would be a K-pop artist from HYBE that tops the Billboard Hot 100 chart, my answer would be yes. [Jimin became the first BTS member to achieve this as a solo act on April 3 when his single “Like Crazy” debuted at No. 1.] The experience of managing BTS and operating different labels gave us access to powerful networks, infrastructures and experiences. With these, HYBE can repeat its remarkable results with the help of talented artists.
Okay so before everyone starts rioting online, take a moment, pause, reflect, think about what all might be going on here, behind the scenes, in this very political world of the music business.
Do I think Bang PD screwed Jimin over to score points with Billboard? No, I do not. But neither do I think Jimin's solo effort is anyone's priority but Jimin's.
"HYBE is primarily focusing on leveraging its accumulated expertise in managing and producing acts that consist of multiple members, rather than solo artists or mixed-gender groups in K-pop."
I think no one ever expected Jimin to make it to #1 on Hot100 and industry insiders felt pretty sure the West wouldn't let him stay in the top 10 the next week. Why? Well, partially racism. But mostly it's bad for their bottom line.
If your entire business model is that people pay for radio play and that gets them on your private chart and the private chart leads to more advertisers and awards... and then someone comes along and DOESN'T pay to play and gets to the top of your chart? Nobody needs you. So you HAVE to sabotage them. You absolutely have to change your rules. (I'm just sitting here waiting for Jimin to release his other songs so that Billboard can change their rules to say you can't be on Hot100 if your name starts with J- and ends with -imin.)
Now, it might have been satisfying for us as fans to see BigHit come out swinging and put Billboard on blast for his sake and ours. But they have ZERO. LEGAL. RECOURSE.
Billboard is privately owned and they can make whatever rules they want. They are part of a larger media company that has connections to every media outlet; no one is gonna publish an exposé any time soon, I promise you. We got exactly ONE English-speaking website to write about it and that was it. Everyone in the industry knows what is going on, and no one has the power to do anything much about it.
So what does that mean for the future?
Well... Bang PD just recently paid a HUGE mark up of $26 million to buy Trevor Noah's home out in LA.
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And now he's on the cover of Billboard. WHY? Neither of these things will result in any immediate payout for him.
It's a long game.
And frankly, a very old and honored way of doing business. It's how they went up against the big three and it's how they are gonna go up against the West, I feel it in my gut.
Bang PD is getting a home on US soil. He will be paying US taxes. He's making in-roads by being nice with Billboard folks. He's making contacts; he's already had phone calls with Pharrell and Bieber and Grande and Laroi. Some of those are already shaping into collabs. We already know Hybe has set up shop in the US with Scooter at the helm.
Meanwhile, BigHit is adjusting in real time to the new rules around the charts (culling is happening to Yoongi too, so they changed up the check-out process of the BTS US Store). Suddenly there's plenty of focus on promoting via TikTok and other viral social media. They are dipping their toe into AI. They are discussing their own in-house ticketing option. This company is looking toward the future and hedging its bets.
Do I know with any certainty what's up their sleeve?
Absolutely not.
Do I trust any corporation very much?
Nope.
Do I have faith in BTS?
Probably more than anything else in my life, at this point.
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So while I have no insider info, I just feel like the company is making very intentional and methodic footholds into the West. They are not complaining or screaming or suing or threatening anyone. They are not badmouthing competitors or whining about unfair deals. They are laying ground on complicated, political in-roads, one step at a time.
The Expo is in 2030. I'd wager by that time, BTS will have conquered the West and have some radio play.
And I think the company believes that in order to do that, they have to make their new groups profitable while BTS serves. They have to survive for the next two years.
When BTS is back, and their dues have been paid, I think they will be unstoppable. I hope they get to work on solo projects AND group projects. I think they will take over every corner of the world, if managed properly.
They just need to do it in a way that also assuages the Western music industry. The American Powers That Be have a chokehold on music and they will demand their pound of flesh somehow.
I strongly suspect BTS will never pay to play. But they will build relationships and find a way to become so interwoven in the cultural fabric that to deny them a place in Western spaces is to be left behind. And they will do it politely, and gently, and come out smelling like a rose.
So before you go off on social media and scream the walls down about neglect (and there WAS some, in my opinion) and abuse (we don't really know that), just take a moment to consider--if they had no legal recourse against Billboard, how can they beat them at their own game?
The best way to defeat an enemy is to make them a friend.
I'm just guessing here, but I think if fans stay loyal, BTS just might have the last laugh, here. I think they got radio scared as hell.
It sucks that Jimin didn't get fair treatment at this time. He is my bias and I feel it like a knife to my own heart. But he DID make history with his #1 and they can never take it away.
So I say give it time. All the people sniggering at him and BTS right now are going to sing a different tune in the future.
My best guess is that this is a long game, and it will require sacrifices that are totally unfair, but in the end... well, as long as BTS has ARMY, they cannot be denied.
Apobangpo.
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ya-boi-haru · 11 months ago
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Hey SMTO fandom! Amongst my time of cosplaying the characters (which you can watch here if you don't know my stuff) I did also do a genderswap au for a fun thing to continue doing the characters, but that was really it, however I'm about to reveal a project I never got around to working on...
✨️Seduce Me: Band AU✨️
I just recently remembered this, so I'm going to try and remember all the headcannons + add new ones, that I would have done!
James: Pianist, guitar + Band manager/agent, Lead vocal
Erik: Pianist, a little guitar, singer
Sam: Drums, guitar, back up singer
Matthew: base, back up singer, drums
Damien: learning: guitar, base, piano and vocals
Mika (mc): Singer
Diana: solo artist/singer
Saero: Diana's bodyguard
Suzu: Drums
Naomi: piano, harp
Andrew: piano
✨️Now headcannons✨️:
(Disclaimer: I'm not very knowledgeable on music stuffs so...)
• All the boys have tattoos, they all got a matching one of a heart with horns (the horns varying to what theirs look like in the game)
• Tattoos (not including the matching ones)
- James: tribal pattern around his lower torso, music notes
- Erik: Twisted rose vines with sharp thorns with blood drops
- Sam: Dragon on his back, demon circle on his shoulder, tribal patter on his front torso (to match his demon markings)
- Matthew: probably something colourful and kinda cute. A small simon tabby on his calf (he lost a bet)
- Damien: 4 music notes, each one drawn by a brother on his wrist
- Diana: Panther that looks like its coming out of her shoulder, Matching golden rose with Searo
• Piercings:
- James: (1)Earlobe double, helix, eyebrow
- Erik: Ears double, helix double, lip, nose, nipples
- Sam: Ears (double), helix ( double each), nose, tounge, lip (snakebite)
- Matthew: Ears, nose, helix (double)
- Damien: Ears (double), nose
- Diana: Ears, nipples, tounge
- Saero: Lip Dolphin bites, ear, helix
• Whenever Sam needs to vent out his feelings he takes it out on his drums, doing "practice sessions"
• All the brothers are teaching Damien how to play/sing since he wasn't allowed to learn growing up
• They've heard of Diana since their parents tries to get them to make a contract with each other but the brothers left their Fathers publisher name before they could
• While they enjoy playing together, the boys do have their own style as well
• SAM USES GUYLINER
• Mika would sing with Naomi and Suzu and they'd pretend to have big gigs while playing the the garage. Her father would rather she take over the producer company, but thinks its good she's "knowledgeable about the art"
• Erik is in charge of their outfits/costumes
• Matthew organises light/stage work etc
• Damien chills back stage with James when he's not on
• Damien is working on a song
• Sam takes his drumsticks with him everywhere. He has multiple and even a lucky pair
• Sams never been one for writing the songs but he tries to for Mika
• The boys started out at bars and small clubs and just where ever they could get a gig. They also done some shows for charity
• Harold discovered them and let them join his record company
• Mika wanted to be a singer but was supposed to take over her dad for the company and she "couldn't do both"
• Diana met up with Harold before about a job at his company but before papers could be finalised, he passed away
• Damien doesn't want to show his song as he's "still working on it" but if you were listening at the right time, you can hear him humming it, trying to work out a melody and lyrics
• Erik, Mika & Matthew are shower singers (both in the AU and cannon)
• The boys learned how to play Mikas favourite song as a surprise for her birthday
• Mika helps them out with Social Media management
That's all I have for now but hope you enjoy the concept. Feel free to add on or use as inspiration for anything (tho please credit/tag)
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spacenutspod · 8 months ago
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Can Europa’s massive, interior ocean contain the building blocks of life, and even support life as we know it? This question is at the forefront of astrobiology discussions as scientists continue to debate the possibility for habitability on Jupiter’s icy moon. However, a recent study presented at the 55th Lunar and Planetary Science Conference (LPSC) might put a damper in hopes for finding life as a team of researchers investigate how Europa’s seafloor could be lacking in geologic activity, decreasing the likelihood of necessary minerals and nutrients from being recycled that could serve as a catalyst for life. Here, Universe Today speaks with Henry Dawson, who is a PhD student in the Department of Earth, Environmental, and Planetary Sciences at Washington University in St. Louis and lead author of the study, about his motivation behind the study, significant results, follow-up studies, and whether Dawson believes there’s life on Europa. So, what was the motivation behind this study? Dawson tells Universe Today, “A large portion of the community has been looking at the habitability potential of the seafloor, and looking at processes that might occur at seafloor hydrothermal vents, or at water–rock interaction chemistry. However, it was never established that there would actually be any fresh rock exposed at the seafloor, or if the tectonic processes that drive hydrothermal vents would be present. The silicate interior of Europa is a similar size to that of Earth’s Moon, which is largely geologically dead on the surface.” Artist’s cutaway illustration of Europa and its potential geologic activity. (Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech/Michael Carroll) For the study, Dawson and his colleagues examined the likelihood for geologic activity occurring on Europa’s seafloor through analyzing data on Europa’s geophysical characteristics and comparing them with known geologic parameters and processes, including the strength of potential fault lines and fractures within Europa’s rocky interior, how the strength of this rock changes with depth, and how the rock could react to ongoing stresses, commonly known as convection. Using this, they conducted a series of calculations to ascertain whether the seafloor crust could drive geologic activity. Therefore, what were the most significant results from this study? “It looks a lot more difficult to expose fresh rock (which is required to drive the reactions that life would exploit) to the ocean,” Dawson tells Universe Today. “Tidal forces do not seem able to cause motion along faults, like it can on the surface, and so the seafloor is most likely still. All the rock that water is able to interact with through porosity was likely altered hundreds of millions to billions of years ago, and so the ocean and rock are in chemical equilibrium. This means that there is no present day, continuous input of nutrients into the ocean from the rocky core, and so any possible life would likely have to exploit nutrient input from the icy shell above the ocean.” While this study focused on geologic stresses related to fractures and fault lines, Europa’s interior ocean is produced from another type of geologic stress known as tidal heating, which is induced from the constant stretching and compressing as Europa orbits the much more massive Jupiter. This same tidal process occurs between the Earth and its Moon, and we see this in action in the rising and falling of the Earth’s waters around the globe. For Europa, over the course of thousands to millions of years, the stretching and compressing leads to friction in Europa’s inner rocky core, which leads to becoming heated and melting the inner ice into the interior ocean that exists today. It is in this ocean that astrobiologists hypothesize that life could exist, possibly even life as we know it. However, given these study’s unfortunate findings, Dawson and his colleagues give dire implications for the potential habitability on Europa, noting their calculations estimate that geologic activity on Europa’s seafloor is limited enough to indicate habitable conditions within Europa’s interior ocean could be limited, as well. However, the study was quick to note that other geologic processes could be examined to explain the present state of Europa’s seafloor geologic activity, including processes known as serpentinization and thermal expansion anisotropy. “As rock is exposed to water and chemically alters, the new minerals that form may have a different molar volume than the unaltered minerals in the original rock,” Dawson tells Universe Today. “Serpentinization specifically is the process where peridotite, a typical mantle rock, is altered to serpentinite. This reaction has a net volume increase, which introduces new stresses. These stresses might lead to the fracturing of the rock, fresh rock faces exposed, and more alteration, leading to a self-propagating cycle. On the other hand, the new minerals might cement up pre-existing fractures, preventing further exposure, and creating a negative feedback loop. Thermal expansion anisotropy describes the process where different minerals have varying degrees of expansion upon heating. Thus, when a rock is heated or cooled, the mineral grains inside will push against each other, introducing porosity and interior stresses.” Regarding the tidal forces responsible for producing Europa’s interior ocean, this icy moon and the Earth’s Moon are not the only planetary bodies in the solar system that could experience these unique forces. Others include Jupiter’s third Galilean Moon, Ganymede, Saturn’s icy moon, Enceladus, and Saturn’s largest moon, Titan, all of which are currently hypothesized to possess interior oceans from tidal heating. Like Europa, Ganymede exhibits a predominantly crater-free surface, which is indicative of frequent resurfacing, and Enceladus was observed on numerous occasions by NASA’s Cassini spacecraft to have geysers on its south pole region that frequently shoots out water into space. Additionally, Cassini flew through these geysers to obtain data on the ejecta’s composition, discovering organic molecules. For Titan, Cassini data revealed that an interior ocean exists beneath its surface, which is currently hypothesized to contain a combination of ammonia and salts. But regarding this most recent research, what follow-up studies are currently being conducted or planned? Dawson tells Universe Today, “I’m currently using the same model to estimate whether tidal forces are able to cause fracturing on other icy moons in the outer solar system, such as Ganymede, Enceladus, Titan, and the mid-size Uranian moons. Based on my preliminary results that I presented at LPSC, it appears that tidal forces are insufficient on those moons as well. In addition, our collaborator Austin Green is looking at whether seafloor volcanism might occur, based on the forces that volcanic dikes can exert on the rock that they are propagating through. For Europa, the lithosphere is too deep and too strong for magma to reach the seafloor, and so any melt that forms in the mantle stalls out at depth.” Despite being discovered by Galileo Galilei in 1610, the fascination for finding life within Europa’s ocean has only come within the last few decades, thanks largely to the NASA Voyager missions, with Voyager 1 and Voyager 2 flying through the Jupiter system in 1979 and imaged the Galilean Moons up close and in detail for the first time, hinting that Europa was currently geologically active. This is because Europa has almost no visible craters throughout its entire surface, indicating specific processes are responsible for reshaping the small moon and covering up evidence of past impacts. Europa, being the second Galilean Moon, shares these traits with the first and third Galilean Moons, Io and Ganymede, respectively, while the fourth Galilean Moon, Callisto has a surface that is almost entirely covered by craters. The Galilean moons of Jupiter: Io, Europa, Ganymede, and Callisto. (Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech) Thanks to further data obtained from proceeding missions, including NASA’s Galileo spacecraft, Hubble Space Telescope, and Juno, scientists are almost entirely convinced that an interior ocean lies beneath Europa’s icy crust, with some estimates putting the volume of liquid water at double of Earth’s oceans. Therefore, as we see on Earth, liquid water means life, which is why Europa’s interior ocean is a target for astrobiology research. But does Henry Dawson think there’s life on Europa? Dawson tells Universe Today, “I think there’s still a lot more that I would like to understand before I make a yes or no statement on that. While I believe that Europa is one of the most likely candidates to host life, alongside Enceladus, the chance of life remains small, and this research reduces the probability even more.” This study comes as NASA prepares to launch the Europa Clipper spacecraft this October with a planned arrival date of April 2030 and is designed to explore the habitability potential of Europa and its interior ocean. During its 3.5-year mission, Clipper will perform up to 44 close flybys of Europa ranging between 25 and 2,700 kilometers (16 to 1,678 miles) as the spacecraft will perform elongated orbits to keep from staying within Jupiter’s powerful magnetic field for too long. To assess Europa’s habitability potential, Clipper will carry a powerful suite of scientific instruments designed to analyze Europa’s chemistry, surface geology, and interior ocean characteristics. Artist’s rendition of NASA’s Europa Clipper (published in January 2021). (Credit: NASA/JPL-Caltech) Additionally, the European Space Agency’s Jupiter Icy Moons Explorer (JUICE) mission was launched in April 2023 with a planned orbital insertion at Jupiter in July 2031, followed by a departure from Jupiter and an orbital insertion around Ganymede in December 2034. Like Clipper, JUICE is designed to investigate the habitability potential of the icy moon, but will also examine Ganymede and Callisto, as well. “Get excited for the Europa Clipper and JUICE missions! Dawson exclaims to Universe Today. “While it will still be 6 years before they reach Jupiter, once they arrive, we will be able to learn much more about what is going on at Europa. While they will not be able to directly measure the interior, observations of the ice shell, gravity field, and tidal forcing on Europa will help to constrain future models. As well, always be careful about the assumptions you make for other planetary bodies. While Europa may be covered with ice, it is truly a rocky world that happens to have a deep ocean, and the processes occurring at depth may not reflect what we see at Earth’s seafloor.” Is Europa’s seafloor geologically active, and what new insights will Europa Clipper and JUICE make about this astonishing and intriguing icy moon in the coming years and decades? Only time will tell, and this is why we science! As always, keep doing science & keep looking up! The post Europa Might Not Be Able to Support Life in its Oceans appeared first on Universe Today.
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mywifeleftme · 1 year ago
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83: The Family // The Family
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The Family The Family 1985, Paisley Park
Prince wrote songs like newspaper cartoonists churn out comics, an untamed profligacy that would eventually bring him into open warfare with his own label and exile him to the pop wilderness. In his halcyon mid-‘80s days though, he channeled his productivity into a network of puppet acts for whom he would pseudonymously write and produce. This isn’t so different from, say, Smokey Robinson being simultaneously a top performer at Motown and a major songwriter for other artists, except that the Purple One was such an idiosyncratic weirdo that you can always tell right away who’s behind the curtain. Prince treated his protégés more like costumes to wear than collaborators. With Vanity and (to a lesser extent) Sheila E. we got Prince as a Woman; through Morris Day, the racially and sexually ambiguous Artist released his most decidedly Black, hetero music; and with The Family’s lead singer St. Paul we got White Prince. Look at this guy!
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Lookit him!
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Anyway, the Family were scraped together from the remains of the Time after Morris Day had tired of Prince’s domineering control, with bassist Paul Peterson promoted to lead vocal duties and joined by Prince’s sometime-girlfriend Susannah Melvoin as a secondary singer. The idea was to present the group as an independent project (Prince is only credited on the packaging for some incidental photography), but the result is Minneapolis Sound (almost literally) by numbers. While Day and Sheila E. were Prince’s peers (or elders) and had their own charisma, the younger St. Paul and his collaborators are completely subsumed by their mentor. It’s not St. Paul’s fault; I doubt he was given much choice other than to do the bargain Prince impression he trots out here. But these machines are built for one driver, and St. Paul lacks the shrieking charisma to make them go. It’s impossible to listen to a song like “High Fashion,” with its big-spending shit talk (“She had the nerve to ask what kinda car I had / I said, ‘Honey, I’m ridin’ in back of a Rolls Royce limo / Custom-painted PLAID!’”) and not wish the man had just taken it for a spin himself.
Still, this is Prince at the height of his powers, and he’s doing the kind of immediately pleasurable pop-funk things that were in increasingly short supply on his own albums of the period. You can easily throw on side one at a party and it’ll keep things moving. Yet the minimal, synthy ballads tucked away on side two represent a better use of the Family’s powers. The sublime “Nothing Compares 2 U” makes its first appearance here, and despite being essentially thrown away (though Prince was wise enough to specifically retain the publishing on it), it is several orders of magnitude greater than anything else here. This rendition is even more austere than Prince’s demo or Sinead O’Connor’s later hit: the arrangement is reminiscent of the intro to “Let’s Go Crazy,” only this time we stay in the futuristic cathedral, with St. Paul and Melvoin harmonizing over dream sequence keys and piercing blasts of sax. Though it will never be considered the definitive version of the song, it stands on its own as an intriguing oddity and a fine example of the deconstructed forms Prince experimented with throughout his career.
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As a post-script, it won’t be too long before Prince Beefology is as accepted an academic specialization as the feuds of Alexander Pope. Nearly all of Prince’s proteges eventually fell out with him, and the Artist’s petty reactions have the flavour of a restaurant owner freaking out because no one wants to work for minimum wage. You can hear him hissing disses at Morris Day low in the mix on “Mutiny”; when St. Paul himself split in 1985, Prince added the song to his tour setlist and led audience chants of “St. Paul, punk of the month” (Thirty years later, Peterson has at least found a way to have fun with it). I don’t know how well he ever really understood other people, which may’ve been why when he wrote for them it almost never left them in a position to enjoy their own success without his continued involvement.
The Family has only once been officially issued on CD and was never repressed on vinyl, so if you’re hunting for a copy you’ll have to score a vintage one. Fortunately, it’s common enough that you shouldn’t have to spend a mint on it. In the realm of Prince rarities, it could be a lot worse.
83/365
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7goodangel · 3 years ago
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FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions) / Guidelines
~ 2021 Edition ~
Last Updated: 03/20/2021
(Note - This is also on dA - but the format on that version is not correct due to site changes)
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Any updated portion will be indicated by double asterisks (**) leading and ending section.
[TL;DR - Please at least read the answers to questions 6, 7, 9, 11 and 12]
This post is split to three separate sections:
Guidelines - Questions for permissions on character(s) and limits on said permissions.
General FAQ - Questions centered on 7goodangel.
Character Specific FAQ - Questions on individual characters.
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GUIDELINES
1.Q: Can I draw your character(s)?
A: Yes. Please credit myself in the description when you post it (and/or tag me if you post it to a platform I'm also on). Also refer to question 6.
2.Q: Can I write fan-fiction with your character(s)?
A: Yes. Please credit myself in the notes/description when you post it (and/or tag me if you post it to a platform I'm also on). Also refer to question 6.
3.Q: Can I have your permission to make an alternate version of your character?
A: Yes. Please take the time to read the full FAQ / Guidelines prior to creating your variation. And have fun!
4.Q: Can I voice act as [character] for comics / stories / etc?
A: Yes. Please refer to questions 5, 6 and 8 prior to publishing works.
5.Q: Can I be the official voice for [character]?
A: There will not be any official voices for characters I have made.
6.Q: Can I write / draw NSFW (Not Safe For Work) of character(s)?
A: No. Please do not post any variation of sexual NSFW including character(s) online. Do not show in detail on any acts that would require a 'fade to black' treatment. This includes but not limited to in$est, v0re, and r@pe. General violence - i.e. battles / fights - is allowed, however, please contact me for any additional questions regarding to this topic.
7.Q: I found NSFW art / story on [website / app] with your character(s) - what should I do?
A: If the website does not allow NSFW in any aspect, report the piece using the correct filter. If the website does allow, then please ignore the item. Do not report art / stories on my or any artist's behalf (i.e. saying you represent the original artist).
8.Q: Can we include a character(s) of yours in a project?
A: Yes, as long as there is no monetization. (Refer to question 9)
9.Q: Can I sell products / commissions / etc. with [character(s)] in it?
A: Depends - Please look at the list below for clarification. 1) One Time Products / Commissions: If a product is only created one time - i.e. a digital/traditional art commission or a one time custom plush - and is not sold in mass production, that is okay. There cannot be a dedicated page for a product with a character of mine - even if the item is labeled "Made to Order" or "Custom Plush [Character Name]" or similar variations. Refer to question 6 as well. 2) Mass Produced / Factory Made Products: No. Do not sell anything with any characters I've created that is massed produced. This includes but not limited to: TShirts produced on websites like RedBubble, Amazon, etc; Mass producing plushies either via factory or by hand (having many created prior to selling); Charms / Buttons / Stickers created in a factory to be sold. 3) Monetization of Videos / Patreon Support for Project / Kickstarter of Project: No. Do not include my character(s) in a project that is monetized. This includes but not limited to: dubbing comics / images / stories that I have created; dubbing comics / images / stories that include character(s) that are not fully distinguished from originals; creating a Patreon specifically around the project including character(s).
10.Q: Can I use [character(s)] as my icon?
A: Yes. Credit appropriately within your header / description (i.e. character by 7goodangel, art by [artist]).
11.Q: Can I repost your artwork to [website / app]?
A: No. Do not repost my artwork to other websites or apps.
12.Q: Can I do the lineart / color for a picture you've done traditionally / digitally sketched?
A: Please send me an ask on Tumblr or message me on dA if you plan to do this.
13.Q: Can I translate asks / facts about character(s) / etc to [language]?
A: Yes. Please give proper credit and links to original question.
14.Q: Can I create an ask/RP account for [character(s)]?
A: No. The only exception to this is if the version is a variation / alternate you've created or had permission for.
15.Q: Can I RP as [character(s)] in other ways?
A: You can RP as [character(s)] within private servers / chat rooms with prior noting that variation will not line up with original.
16.Q: Can we RP with [character(s)] in NSFW situations?
A: Refer to question 6.
GENERAL FAQ
17.Q: Where are you from?
A: Earth.
18.Q: Can we become friends?
A: There are no guarantees.
19.Q: How long have you been drawing?
A: Most of my life - but started to focus into current style in 2006.
20.Q: What programs / tools do you use for your drawings?
A: In the past, programs I used were Photoshop CS5 and Illustrator CS5. Currently, I use Clip Studio Paint. Traditional is mostly typical printer paper and mechanical pencils.
21.Q: Can you draw [character(s)]?
A: Not likely. If opened to suggestions - I may draw them if there is time. Please do not expect all suggestions to be fulfilled.
22.Q: What about pairings / ships?
A: I'm pretty neutral with most ships, except for dynamics like in$est, abusive or [adult x minor] (whether actual ages or coded like that). (Note: Exceptions can/is more than listed.). Though I typically ship in more of a friendship way verses romantic.
23.Q: Are you okay with the ship FreshPaper / PaperFresh / Fresh x Paper Jam?
A: I am fine with others shipping this. I have my own interpretations for this ship that are different from most. Refer to question 22.
CHARACTER SPECIFIC FAQ
24.Q: Is Paper Jam / Blue Screen a Sans?
A: No.
25.Q: Is there a biography for Paper Jam?
A: Yes. You can find here: https://www.deviantart.com/7goodangel/art/Paper-Jam-Bio-779347877
26.Q: Can we still use old design of Paper Jam?
A: Yes.
Note: Additional items can be added to this post, as well as edits.
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thoughts-on-bangtan · 3 years ago
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Let’s talk: Serendipity with a side of 4 O’Clock and other guest appearances
by Admin 1 and 2
We’ve been meaning to write a analysis/theory/discussion on Serendipity for the longest time, especially after I once mentioned in a previous post how I think the song can be interpreted in a way that works for both vmin and namjin. So, while I’ll add my thoughts in regard to the latter, the vmin portion is more based on conclusions and thoughts Admin 2 arrived at. I think their idea presents a perspective I haven’t really seen anywhere else before yet, so I think it’ll hopefully be interesting.
As with any song analysis/discussion/theories, this only represents some of our interpretations which don’t have to be right and no one is meant to take this as gospel. Art is subjective and while we all listen to the same song, read the same lyrics, our understanding and thoughts may/will vary, so you might not agree with any of what we say and you are not obliged to do so. This is just meant as a discussion, some pondering, and perhaps we can discover something along the way that we haven’t considered yet.
With that being said, let’s get into it.
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Additional preface: this post will work off of the assumption that both vmin and namjin have romantic feelings for each other and/or are together. If this isn’t an angel you’re interested in reading about, this likely isn’t the post for you. Furthermore, if you’d prefer to put on your delulu hat for the duration of this post, please take a moment to put it on now. Enjoy!
All lyric translations are from doolset.
Serendipity is the opening song on Love Yourself: Her, the first album of the Love Yourself trilogy, and was released September 18th 2017. Of all the members, Namjoon is the only one credited as lyricist on it along with four other people (two outsiders, Slow Rabbit and Bang PD). Based on that we can say that Namjoon definitely had a big influence of the content of the lyrics and the story they tell so analyzing the song in the context of Namjoon makes sense. But at the same time the song is Jimin’s solo so I don’t think it is that farfetched to think that he kept Jimin in mind when writing the lyrics, and judging by how attached vmin, and especially Tae, seem to be to this song, thinking that there might be more to it than just the fact that it’s Jimin’s solo, again, seems like a sensible conclusion to arrive at. In 2020 Tae even used a moment where he recommended Serendipity (as part of the digital Map of the Soul ON:E Exhibition which, by the way, opened on Jimin’s birthday) in order to wish Jimin a happy birthday.
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Serendipity /ˌsɛr(ə)nˈdɪpɪti/ as: the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.
Looking at the meaning of the title and the big focus on the concept of destiny displayed in the lyrics, I think it makes a lot of sense in the context of Bangtan. The members themselves have spoken about how it was meant to be them, these seven men, and just think about how many different factors had to work in their favor for them to end up not only as trainees for BigHit but also as members of BTS. If Seokjin hadn’t gotten on that specific bus and gotten off on that station the BigHit staff might’ve never seen him and approached him, if Tae hadn’t gone with his friend to the audition and hadn’t gotten talked into auditioning himself, he wouldn't even be an idol at all, and if Jimin’s dance teacher hadn’t encouraged him to audition he wouldn’t have come as trainee to Seoul either. And if one of the BigHit producers hadn’t seen Namjoon, hadn’t shown him to Bang PD, BTS wouldn’t have been created at all. As the lyrics themselves say:
이 모든 건 우연이 아냐 All this is not a coincidence
Timeline wise we think Serendipity is about two different moments in time depending if you look at vmin or namjin. For the latter I’d say it’s about the beginning of their relationship which, if namjinists are right in our thoughts and theories, would put this sometime 2013. Meanwhile for vmin, Admin 2 actually thinks it would be 2016, more specifically the time of the dumpling incident, so before FIRE was released. This also leads us to the main idea that Admin 2 arrived at and thought of, being that Serendipity and 4 O’Clock tell two sides to the same story, as in Tae in 4 O’Clock is the one waiting for the other person, who describes the moment in time and the feelings he had when that person came to meet him. Meanwhile Jimin is the one who came to meet him, who asks him to love him, who cried because of his feelings and who’s telling him about those feelings and thoughts (as displayed by the sentiments of Serendipity). Namjoon also wrote both, and he knew as many details of the incident as Tae was willing to share with him which, seeing how filled with emotion and deep the lyrics to 4 O’Clock are, I’m sure were rather extensive. How else would he has been able to write such beautiful lyrics?
Actually, to sidetrack for a moment, Admin 2 thinks that it’s not a coincidence that Namjoon isn’t just on 4 O’Clock was writer but also as artist, that in a way he also verbalizes his own pain/troubles through his verse even though, as far as we know, namjin never had anything that would be like the dumpling incident, but in this sense it’s more about what the incident represents rather that the literal event. As in, for vmin this was the big fight they had, a majorly significant moment that brought about a change in their dynamic and bond, and according to them it was their last big fight in general. Like a moment that was destined to happen in order to allow for them to later down the line grow into what they are today in connection to each other, but we think it was also a moment in which, while they might’ve realized and opened up to each other about their feelings, it was also when they had to realize that despite there being more to their feelings, it wasn’t the time for it.
As the lyrics in Serendipity say:
설레는 만큼 많이 두려워 As much as my heart flutters, I’m afraid
운명이 우릴 자꾸 질투해서 because the destiny keeps getting jealous of us
너만큼 나도 많이 무서워 As much scared as you are, I’m, too, scared
When you see me When you touch me
Destiny in this case represents their career and them being idols, being part of a group destined to become the phenomenon and the superstars they are today, meaning that this destiny stood in the way of their bond in a romantic sense. They had to prioritize this destiny over their feelings, over wanting to be with each other, because they were afraid of the repercussions that could otherwise bring upon them (as well as the other members). Besides, they could also look at namjin who, in a way, came before them. If theories are right and namjin were together sometimes starting in 2013, they had to eventually split romantically for the greater good of the band, so if their relationship had to take the back seat, so to speak, destiny having gotten in their way (gotten jealous of them), how could vmin know it wouldn’t be the same for them? Besides they already had so much going on with Jimin’s feelings of jealousy due to Tae’s Hwarang hyungs, Tae’s work on the drama keeping him away from the band and exhausting him even more, and the sad things still to come which they couldn’t know at that time just yet.
From Sweet Night we know that they had a first chance that Tae didn’t take, that he couldn’t have known that one day he would wake up and feel more for his best friend, as in Jimin, even though, deep down he realized that he’d long reached the shore already. So, in that park that night the conclusion they arrived at was that while they couldn’t move forward with their feelings (because perhaps Tae didn’t even know just yet the extent of his own), he realized that Jimin is an angel after he told him that he at least wants to be his source of strength which subsequently unleashed arrows of pent up emotions from his heart. So while it was a positive event in sense of it bringing clarity, to a certain degree, about their feelings for each other, it was also one of sadness because they knew they couldn’t follow those feelings. Remember how when performing 4 O’Clock Tae cried in the end? If it were a song just reminiscing about two friends making up at the park after a fight over them being stubborn about dumplings, would he really feel saddened enough to cry, to get to that level of emotionality?
Later in the song the lyrics say:
이젠 곁에 와줘 Now, please be by my side
우리가 되어줘 Please be us
I don’t wanna let go no
그냥 맡기면 되는 거야 We can just leave it to fate
말 안 해도 느껴지잖아 We can feel it even if we don’t talk
Here the important part would be the line about how they can leave things up to fate, which can be interpreted as even if things might not be what we want them to be right now or anytime soon, they will happen eventually because that’s how it’s meant to be. The lyrics generally make a lot of mention of how their love is destined, how their happiness together has been destined since the universe was first created. So it shows a sense of trust that regardless of what will happened, or might’ve happened in the past, they will find their way back together eventually (in a romantic sense). Like, again, in Sweet Night where Tae didn’t use his first chance but hopes he’ll get a second one and, judging by the hopeful tone of the song and everything that we know currently, it looks like he got it and it worked out in their favor. The same, I think, can also be said about namjin.
Looking at the lyrics of Serendipity, the idea of them being fated even though their meeting was serendipitous, Namjoon is basically telling us that here, too, he believes that his connection to Seokjin, if we are correct in the interpretation that Seokjin is the lover hinted at throughout different songs on the Love Yourself albums, was also meant to be and that it will remain as such even if they had to step away from each other romantically, that while they used to be scared back in the day to be together, to open up to each other about their feelings, it still was destiny and that it would work out in the end. Looking at how much they’ve influenced each other, how Namjoon even went as far as saying that Seokjin is his muse/inspiration in a way, would such conclusion really be all that farfetched?
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The first line of the quoted verse also reminds me of the same sentiment that Jimin wrote about three years later for Friends in which he wrote:
언젠가 이 함성 멎을 때 stay hey Someday, when these cheers die down, stay hey
내 옆에 함께 있어줘 Stay with me by my side
영원히 계속 이곳에 stay hey Forever, keep staying here, hey
We know that forever/eternity is a big thing when it comes to Jimin and Tae which we’ve seen as early as 2014 with the picture of their intertwined hands that Tae posted on twt with the wish of them keeping going together for a long time and then with Jimin’s addition of saying forever. Later during Bon Voyage 4 he also said that again, how he wants to live with his lovely Taehyungie forever, and years before that how he wants them to be together until they’re grandpas.
So, in a way, it isn’t just destiny they trust that will be in their favor, but it’s also their active wish and “work” in that direction, that it’s not just something a higher force has foreseen for them but it’s also something they consciously want for themselves as well. All because of that serendipitous fact that they ended up as trainees and members of BTS.
넌 내 푸른 곰팡이 You’re my blue mold (penicillin)
날 구원해 준 that saved me
나의 천사 나의 세상 My angel, my world
Here is where we can draw two connection directly to Tae and Jimin, one because of something Jimin said about Tae years prior and the other due to the fact that as recently as the second half as 2020 (DICON Magazine) Tae said he had Jimin saved on his phone as Penicillin. We also know that after the song came out, Tae made a phone case for Jimin with the word penicillin on it which Jimin proudly used and showed off. 
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Furthermore penicillin itself is something that can save you, and while we might not know from what, exactly, Jimin needed to be saved, he did say that Tae is more than just his close friend, he is also his savior.
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As for Namjoon, there was certainly a time where he would’ve needed someone to save him, from himself and his dark, less than life positive, thoughts (as displayed by the lyrics in Always) but also the world around them back in 2015/16 where he was seen as the worst of the worst for things he’d said that had been purposefully misconstrued and misunderstood, as well as lyrics he’d written which, again, where taken to mean things much different from what he actually tried to say. While there is nothing I can use or base any assumptions on that Seokjin would be the one/was the one who saved him, contextually, I don’t think it would be farfetched that he did help him and was there for him during that time, much the way the other members surely were too. Based on what we know about Abyss and the background of that song, we know Namjoon helped Seokjin in some ways with it, so if Seokjin came to him and spoke to him about the hard time he was having in 2020, it isn’t that out there to think that Namjoon might’ve done the same back in 2015/16, and during other times between when they first met until Namjoon wrote these lyrics, right?
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난 네 삼색 고양이 I’m your calico cat
널 만나러 온 that came to meet you
Love me now touch me now
Calico cats are very rare, and usually you’ll only find female calico cats, meaning that male ones are even more rare than that. Looking at Namjoon as a person, I’d say he is a very rare type of person as well, I mean, how many teenage underground rappers turned idol group leaders who might also be queer and is also a literal genius do you know off the top of your head? Furthermore calico cats are seen as lucky cats in many cultures and places so in this sense Namjoon/Jimin would represent something lucky/positive that came to their partner which, if we again look at things that were said over the years, Jimin did say that Tae is the happiest when he’s with Jimin.
As for Namjoon and Seokjin, this could be connected to the fact that Seokjin was thankful that Namjoon is on their team, their ally, instead of someone from another group, thus seeing it as luck that they are together (Rolling Paper FESTA 2020), like he is their good luck charm that played a major role in them getting to where they are, so to speak. And yes I’m aware that he said that three years after the song was released but it wasn’t the first or only time he ever voiced such sentiment. Seokjin has underlined how much he admires Namjoon’s abilities as leader and lyricist many, many times over the years.
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“Our leader, RM. This guy is amazing. There are 2 more older guys than him, yet he is great as leader. I want to thank our leader personally.” -- Seokjin as a concert which, judging by their hairstyles (and the use of Namjoon’s old artist name) must’ve been some time around Dark & Wild perhaps?
As a side note, the mention of calico cats reminds me of a picture Seokjin posted for Namjoon’s birthday in 2019 (so two years after Serendipity had already come out) in which Namjoon is seen asleep while sitting and hugging a calico cat plushy. You’ll recognize both the plushy and the ARMY B*mb hat as part of the VCRs for 4th Muster in 2018. So I’m mentioning this as more of a cute thing rather than some kind of definitive sign of any sort really. By the way, that same cat plushy can also be seen when Tae lies sleeping and Jimin sits next to him singing the calico cat line and places the plushy on Tae.
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But, what I think is, for me at least, the biggest hint toward Serendipity being, to a degree at least, about/inspired by vmin is the fact that early in 2017, February more specifically, Jimin and Tae both called each other their soulmates during one of their fansigns. And what are soulmates if not two people destined to meet and be with each other, two people quite literally meant for each other? And here Jimin is singing a song about how his love for this person and his happiness with them was fated, that destiny had this planned for them regardless how scared they may be and how destiny (outside factors) might be jealous of them (keep getting in their way).
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Furthermore, isn’t it curious how this song, specifically, is written as gender neutral instead of with female pronouns like their songs in the past or even Outro: Her off the same album? Yes, Namjoon explained in their interview with Billoard that this decision was one he made because these rare moments and special things in life are something that transcend genders, cultures and barriers between people, and love is also something that doesn’t care about genders, in this case love and destiny don’t care about the fact that they are all the same gender because they are fated anyway, they are soulmates, each others fated person, and their happiness is meant to be in one way or another. Together.
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KAORU PERSONAL INTERVIEW SPECIAL HEADBANG VOL.27 TRANSLATION 2/2
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The ideal figure that the guitarist who leads the band as a leader got while struggling, and the reason for his unstoppable pursuit. “Without ‘BLUE BLOOD’ I wouldn’t really be who I am now” “After all, I’ve always liked dark and hopeless stuff, that kind of things” “I’m the type of person who wants to be affected by cd jackets and lyrics” "Sometimes I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere"
Notes before reading: This is the second part of the personal interview of Kaoru from the magazine Headbang Vol.27 released on 18th August 2020.  The interview is 11 pages long and this part covers the last 5 pages.  As Toshiya and Die’s interviews, 2nd part is focused on his roots as a guitarist.
You can get the magazine at Amazon Japan or CDJapan. Read Toshiya’s interview here Read Die’s interview here
Feel free to correct me if you spot any mistake or any confusing. Links or credits to this post when the content is reposted or captured in other SNS is appreciated :) ----- Text by: Yohsuke Hayakawa (First part here) “Without “BLUE BLOOD” I wouldn’t really be who I am now” -Then, the topic of the talk changes from here.  I would like to ask you about the story behind the 20 albums that you selected regardless of era or reasons but, you chose 10 albums from Japan and 10 foreign albums.
K: Is that true? (laughs). It's a coincidence, but it was very difficult to narrow down when it came to choose again. So, I chose mainly the ones I listened to a lot before I started the band and when I started doing it. They are just albums that influenced me. -I have the impression that Japanese music was a kids who read WeROCK’s thing. K:  Hahaha. Yes (laughs). -First of all…. COLOR's mini album "FOOLS! GET LUCKY !!" (1989) is also included. I have to ask about why you picked this one. K: Well, I really love it (laughs). Even though it was "X in the east, COLOR in the west"*, I was really into it, so I went to see their live performance. I like their punkish songs and they have many fast songs. At that time, if a song wasn’t  fast, it was a “no” for me. I also liked ROSE ROSE. *(This makes reference to X Japan being from the Kanto region (East) and COLOR being from Kansai (West) as both band emerged around the same time.) -Then D'ERLANGER. DIR EN GREY participated in D'ERLANGER's tribute (announced in 2017 ‘D'ERLANGER TRIBUTE ALBUM  ~ Stairway to Heaven~ "). Was the album "LA VIE EN ROSE" (1989) a shock for you?
K: That’s right, “LA VIE EN ROSE” too but also CIPHER (G) himself. Well, I think it was at ”BURNN! JAPAN”, CIPHER appeared in a solo photo on one page in colour.
-Oh, it’s a shot in which you can see him standing with a flashy Les Paul guitar. It was before kyo (D’ERLANGER vocalist) became a member. K: That’s right.  I though “What on earth is this person?” After that, they were releasing a CD ("LA VIE EN ROSE") , so I made a I made a reservation right away.
-Also, a band you can't miss from those times is DEAD END. It never gets old because it’s respected across generations. K: I chose "Shambara" (1988), well, it's a masterpiece. Just listening to the opening song "EMBRYO BURNING" made me sick. When I first started listening to metal music, I was a bit reluctant but with DEAD END, the melody that MORRIE sung got me very quickly, I got into them without any resistance. I didn’t have the impression that DEAD END was so-called “metal”. Since I started playing in bands, I was overwhelmed by the seriousness of YOU’s guitar technique. - Next is ZI: KILL is "ROCKET" (1993). Initially, the dark positive punk style was strong but with that last album, their musicality expanded dramatically and there are even piano jazz songs. K: It’s an album that feels like something has been reached. I got into ZI:KILL since the early albums and after making their major debut, I got the impression that their albums got milder. However, when I listened to "ROCKET", it seemed like an insanely cool album. I still listen to it. -Including a horn in their arrangements was ground-breaking. K: Yes, at first I hated it! But somehow, I didn’t care about it at all. Still, TUSK (Vo) lyrics and the songs were addictive. It made a deep impression on me, that’s why I read ZI:KILL lyrics carefully as well.
-Do you care about the lyrics when it comes to Japanese artists? K: I check the booklets properly. After all, the lyrics reach my ears at the point in which the words make you feel something.
- And, needless to say, you also chose X's "BLUE BLOOD" (1989). At the Vol. 20 of this magazine, you chose it as a “metal album that changed your life”. So, as expected, if you choose an album from X japan, would be this one? K: Without this album, I wouldn't really be who I am now.
-You were influenced by everything, both the music and the guitar play….is that so? K: The guitar too, right? Well, it’s not at that level anymore.
-Ah, that’s not the level (laughs) K: I was just listening to it earnestly and thinking “amazing!”, it just something that I like, there is no particular reason (laughs).
“Western music  (I listened to) was also greatly influenced by HIDE. That’s why everything it’s related to HIDE (laughs)”
- On the other hand, Tsuyoshi Nagabuchi and Cocco are also included. K: I've always liked Nagabuchi. Like "Tonbo" (1988), there was a tv drama about that. *(”Tonbo” (Dragonfly) was also a tv drama  in which Tsuyoshi Nagabuchi played a member of a yakuza gang  who is trapped in a violent existence.)
- Oh, after that was "Shabontama" (1991). K: I also like the movie "Orgel" (1989), I was really into Nagabuchi at that time. The "Showa" (1989) album I chose this time is the album that got me hooked. The masterpiece "Gekiai" which is my favourite song was recorded around that time.
-You liked Nagabuchi’s drama series. K: Yes, they are rather dark series. I don’t know much about the brighter/cheerful ones.
-The ones like "Family Game" (1983)? K: That's right. Those are not the ones that I prefer. After all, I’ve always liked dark and hopeless stuff, that kind of things. -(Laughs) However, the radical portrayal of Nagabuchi’s drama shocked your heart as a young boy. Probably such a drama couldn’t be made in this era. K: Yes, you can’t. There isn’t even a rebroadcast of these ones.
-Certainly.  Also, I remember that Cocco was around in the scene at the same time than HIDE (g). K: Yes. When I listened to her album, it didn’t feel like I was listening to a Japanese cd. I felt like it was a western heavy band, so I got into it with that kind of image.
-I feel that foreign music, the alternative vibe is overall stronger, but do you like that? K: After all, HIDE’s influence in foreign music (I listened to) is huge. At that time, I was buying various magazines and looking for some more, I checked the names that appeared in HIDE’s articles and I’ve been listening to the ones I liked all the time.
- I have the impression that HIDE had a great influence on you listening to bands like Jane's Addiction at that time. What about Vanessa Paradis and Japan ( English new wave band)? K: That was also due to the influence of HIDE. That’s why almost everything is related to HIDE (laughs). Also, this album of hers (released in 1992, “Vanessa Paradis”) was produced by Lenny Kravitz, who liked to go to her lives.  She's still good, but I especially like her early days, I'm attracted to that voice.
“I’m the type of person who wants to be affected by cd jackets and lyrics”
- So that's it. The only work related to HIDE that you chose was with X Japan but, what about his solo works? K: Well, of course I like his solo, but in my case, I like HIDE in X Japan the most.
-Other than that, I can tell that you like strong sounds, heavy riffs and industrial. K: That’s right. As I was always seeking fierce things, I came to like strong riffs such as Pantera and Ministry.
-What about the so-called European German metal? K: Especially at that time, it wasn’t my cup of tea (laughs) - Then, some of the foreign music you chose…. "Psalm 69: The Way To Succeed And The Way To Suck Eggs" (1992) by Ministry. This album was already mentioned in this magazine before as an important metal album for you. K:  At that time, there was a foreign-related CD shop called WAVE at  Umeda Loft in Osaka. I think that I found it there and listened to it. I was like “what the hell?”, so I bought it right away. I listened to it at home again. That night I went to a acquaintance’s house and I said “Listen to this!”, and I forced him to listen (laughs). -I can tell your excitement (laughs) K: Then I listened to all the other albums. Above all, I like this one the most.  -And you also mentioned Nine Inch Nails. K: The first thing I heard from them was a single or something. At that time, I thought, "Wow, that's amazing," but when I listened to the songs on that album, I felt like I was listening to something I had never heard before. It's dark, but it sounds very aggressive. But it’s not like european music dark feeling.At that time, I wasn't sure if  they were a band or not (laughs).  -You wondered if it was a one-person band. K: That’s right. I was like “Is the same person doing everything?”, “Is he playing drums too?”. Everything was a mystery. Information was not available as soon as it does now, so I was wondering “Who is this person?”. I also wondered if the cd jacket had something to grasp, like it was a cd jacket that I didn’t really understand. Like the logo. It was all mysterious and addictive. I myself am the type who wants to be influenced/affected by cd jackets and lyrics, so I look at every corner. Everything up to the back of the wrapping. Then, when I looked at the back, I thought, "Isn't there anything attached?" (Laughs).  -(Laughs)There are many things that are totally attractive, including elaborate art books.  K: Yes. Especially for Nine Inch Nails, I went looking for some place that sell T-shirts of them.  "Sometimes I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere"  -Among these works, isn't there any in particular that has an easy-to-understand influence on the songs that you make with DIR EN GREY? K: Well, I don't know that .  - Some of the works you chose this time have a strong melody…. For example, on a 2017 tour focused in “MACABRE" (2000), you played “Taijou no ao” for the first time in a while. I mentioned in this magazine before that "If you change the arrangement of a song to your current style, you can still play it ", but is there a desire to make a song with that kind of melody now? K: I don’t have a particular desire to do it. I think that it feels like something from that time, it’s an image that doesn’t make me feel excited now.  -By the way, do you usually listen to music with melodies like that? K: I do, I do.  Rather, I’ve been listening to pop music all the time lately.  I am not listening noisy bands at all.  -Noisy ones (laughs). K: Hahaha. -However, it's a little hard to think that you are going to make songs like that. K: Yeah, it doesn't happen very often sometimes, but there are times when I can do it. A song with a very pop and bright atmosphere. So, when I tried to start to work on songs, one turns out like “this is what I have done”. But maybe then I think that it’s a little different from what I do with DIR EN GREY, so I have to mess with it, fix it or just store it. - Eh! Do you make that kind of songs? I would like to hear a song like that from you now. That’s why the melody of “Taijou no Ao” that I mentioned as an example is not only pop but also suffocating. Faintly scented lyrics. I wonder if that it’s your true self. K: That's right.The first thing that influenced me was  the New Wave*. Pet Shop Boys and so, I liked that kinds of thing. That’s why there is a bit of that “kind of atmosphere” sometimes. It's not just pop. *(New wave is a broad music genre that encompasses numerous pop-oriented styles from the late 1970s and the 1980s) -There is also a sorrowful side. K: So, if I had to pick one, Europe is better in that than America. Well, when it comes to the songs I make, I’d like to make them more interesting, but I don’t feel like doing something that is off the point/wrong.  -I have to ask you about the melody part now. K: If you have any concerns, I will answer them…  - What if there is something clear for you like, “this song has this kind of image”? K: After that, Kyo has several ways to sing so I will combine them in my own way and propose new melodies. Like “I think in this way would be cool”.   -Oh, that’s how you do it. In any case, now I'm looking forward to the day when I can listen to a new song again. Will the album be completed in 2021? K: That's right.  -By the way, Kaoru-san's hard disk has already material for the new album…. K: Well, there's something for the album……there is, but it’s still not the whole thing at all (laughs).
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world-of-puppets · 4 years ago
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Puppetry Lost Media
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In honour of reaching 50 followers last week (now 55 followers, as of writing this) I decided to cover two subjects of great interest to me: puppetry (of course) and lost media.
Everybody online loves a good old bit of lost media. Whether it be being a part of the many searches for the media in question, or watching documentaries about them on sites like YouTube. I’ve been mildly addicted to the latter kind of content for a while. From what I’ve seen, though, there aren’t many videos or articles out there specifically covering lost puppetry. So, in no particular order, here are a couple of pieces of lost puppetry I found while scrolling through the lost media wiki.
銀河少年隊 - Ginga shounen-tai AKA Galaxy Boy Troop (1963 - 1965)
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Osamu Tezuka is one of the most pioneering figures in Japanese art and animation. Starting as a manga artist in the 1940s inspired by the animated works of American studios such as Walt Disney and the Fliecer Brothers, he adapted and simplified many of the stylistic techniques of both artists to create his own signature style of big shiny eyes, physics defying hair and limited animation. A style that would go on to heavily influence the world of anime and manga as a whole.
But animation and graphic art were not the only mediums Tezuka would dabble in. Ginga Shounen-Tai, or Galaxy Boy Troop in english, was a television series that aired on the public broadcast channel NHK from April 7th, 1963 to April 1st, 1965. Running for 2 seasons with a total of 92 episodes.
The series was a mixture of marionette characters that utilised the Supermarionation marionette technique, popularised by Jerry Anderson’s Thunderbirds, and limited traditional animation. The story revolves around a child genius named Roy who leads a rag-tag group of heros around the galaxy in a rocket ship in order to revive the earth’s sun and later protect it from alien invaders.
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Out of the 92 episodes that aired, only episode 67 still exists in its entirety with French subtitles, and the full episode can be found on YouTube with English subtitles uploaded by user Rare TezukaVids. According to user F-Man on the Tezuka in English forums, footage of episode 28 exists but with no audio, and episode 87’s animated segments exist without the marionette segments. F-Man also claims the reason for Galaxy Boy Troop’s disappearance is due to Tezuka not being proud of the series and having all episodes of it destroyed.
Personally, I think it’s a shame that pretty much all of this series is gone. From what I’ve seen in episode 67, it looks really charming. Tezuka’s signature character design style was adapted suprisingly well to marionettes, and the puppetry itself isn’t that bad either. I love the little face mechanisms like the blinking eyes, flapping mouths and others. It gives the puppets a lot of personality and charm. Like, just look at this old mans eyebrow mechanism and tell me you wouldn’t want to watch 92 episodes of this show;
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Tinseltown (2007)
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Tinseltown was a 15 minute sitcom pilot created by the Jim Henson company under thier Henson Alternative banner. The pilot was commissioned by the Logo Network and aired as part of the Alien Boot Camp programming block in 2007.
The pilot (and likely the series, had it been picked up by the logo network) features a cast of both puppets and live actors as characters. The premise revolves around Samson Kight, an anthropomorphic bull preformed by Brian Henson and drew Massey, and his partner Bobby Vegan, an anthropomorphic pig prefomed by Bill Barretta and Michelan Sisti, as they attempt to balance thier lives working in Hollywood with life as parents to thier sullen 12-year-old foster son, Foster, played by Paul Butcher. Other human characters included Mia Sara as Samson’s ex-wife Lena and Francesco Quinn as the family’s manservant Arturo.
The Tinseltown pilot used to be available on the Logo Network’s YouTube channel, but was later removed for unknown reason. Since then, the pilot has not been made available online. However the characters Samson and Bobby have made appearances in other Henson related works, such as the improv stage show Stuffed and Unstrung, where they played the role as the shows producers, and in a 2011 video on the Jim Henson Company YouTube channel celebrating Jim Hensons 75th birthday.
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I find Tinseltown pretty interesting as I feel like it should be more noateable or known, considering that this is (as far as my knowledge goes) the first Jim Henson Company project featureing openly lgbtq characters as its leads, and would have been the first Henson show to do so had it been picked up. As someone who’s interested in lgbtq+ representation in creative media such as animation, I realised that there’s not many examples of canon lgbt characters in puppetry. The only ones aside from Samson and Bobby I could think off the top of my head would be Deet’s Dads from The Dark Crystal: Age of Resistance and Rod from Avenue Q. Though, obviously, there could be more I’m not currently aware of. I don’t think the Tinseltown pilot was a masterpiece or anything. After all, there’s probably a couple of good reasons Logo didn’t pick it up for a full series. But I think it be cool if either Henson co. or Logo made this available online again, if just so we could appericate it as an interesting little footnote in the history of lgbtq rep in puppetry.
With that said, considering the pilot’s obscurity and the fact that it’s main couple haven’t been used in any Henson Related projects in almost ten years, as well as the possibility that there may be legalities preventing the Henson company from releasing it such as Logo still owning the rights, it’s unlikely we’ll see the Tinseltown pilot anytime soon.
Sonic Live in Sydney (1997 - 2000)
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Sonic the Hedgehog is a fictional character no stranger to multiple interpretations of him and his universe across a diverse range of media. From the more light-hearted and comedic stylings of The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog and Cartoon Networks Sonic Boom cartoon series, to more serious faire such as the Sonic SatAM cartoon and the Sonic Adventure videogame duology. One of the more obscure and stranger adaptations of the character came in the form of Sonic Live in Sydney, a one an a half hour live show hosted at the former Sega World Sydney amusement park in Darling Harbor, Sydney, Australia. Originally beginning as a live show with actors in meet-and-greet style costumes, the show eventually was replaced with a puppet show during its last two years.
The shows plot was set in an alternate timeline whos continuity was a mix of the SatAM cartoon and Sonic the Hedgehog 3, where Doctor Robotnik’s Death Egg crash lands in Sydney, Australia instead of Angel Island and attempts to take over before being foiled by sonic and friends. According to Phillip Einfeld of Phillip Einfeld Puppetoons, the company that made the puppets, Sega felt the costumed actor version of the show wasn’t dynamic enough, and wished to replace it with a version featuring live puppets with animatronics. Both versions of the shows plot are identical.
While Sonic Live in Sydney’s soundtrack is available on YouTube, and some photos of the show are available on the Lost Media Wiki, no footage of either the costumed actors version or the puppet show version have resurfaced. The show was closed down in 1999, possibly due to cost, shortly before the Sega World park as a whole in 2000. So unless there is someone out there who viseted the show between 1998 or 1999 who recorded the show via a handheld camera, footage of both incarnations of the show are likely forever lost to time.
On a personal note, I don’t have much to say on this one other than how gloriously peek gaudy 90s Sonic the set/puppet design is. I have no doubt finding footage of these puppets in action would truly be a silly delight to behold...
Legend of Mary (year unknown)
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This one is a little different from the other entries on this list as while the film itself in its entiraty is available on YouTube for anyone to view, the information surrounding Legend of Mary, specifically its year of release, remains a mystery as of writing this.
I have mentioned the film before on this blog so I’ll keep it brief here: in summary, Legend of Mary is a short film retelling of the Nativity featuring the Rod puppets of Austrian puppeteer Richard Teschner. the video was uploaded to YouTube by user canada 150 archive. I looked up the people credited in the film and was able to find most of them, but didn’t find Legend of Mary listed in thier credits, and was unable to find the film on sites like IMDB, tMDB or Letterboxd. I reached out to Canada 150 archive asking if they had any info regarding the Legend of Mary’s release date, and after a coupe of months, they replied saying they didn’t know.
And that’s as far as I got on my search for answers, if anyone of you guys has any information regarding Legend of Mary, then it be of huge help in finding the release date.
Sam and friends (1955 - 1961)
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Sam and friends was the very first puppetry television series created by Jim Henson alongside his colabarator and future wife Jane Nebel. filmed in Washington, D.C. and airing twice daily on WRC-TV and the NBC affiliate in Washington, D.C. from May 9, 1955, to December 15, Sam and Friends would mark the first apperence of Kermit (though not yet as a frog) and paved the way for Henson’s iconic and revered legacy in the realm of puppetry on film and television.
With the impact this show had in mind, it may come as a shock to some that almost half of Sam and Friends, specifically, 42 of the 86 episodes, are considered lost. With 16 existing, 8 documented, 9 known from memory, plus 8 existing Esskay commercials and 1 memory-known Esskay commercial. Some taped episodes have been shown at venues such as the museum of the moving image while others have been erased. It’s unknown if copies of these erased episodes still exist.
This post would become far to long if I were too list every episode missing from Sam and Freinds, but if your curious, the lost media wiki article has a comprehensive list of all lost episodes.
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Annnd that about it for this post. This type of content is pretty different from the stuff I usually post. So I’m egar to see what you guys think about it. If you enjoyed this article, want to see more like it or have ideas for what puppetry-related topics I should cover in the future. And again, thank you all so much for helping me reach 55 followers. Your support really does mean a lot to me, and I hope you enjoyed this as a follower milestone gift.
Anyways, hope you enjoyed this dip into lost puppetry, and have a happy holiday season!
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death-selfie · 3 years ago
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Put Your Head On My Shoulder
Chapter 3: Just a Kiss Goodnight
For the rest of the night, Gerard and I walked the streets of Belleville. We took a walk into town and pretended to window shop like it was midday. We even looked over the closed flower shop and maybe stole a flower or two. Outside of town, we skipped down a trail together, hand in hand. Our little journey ended at the Passaic River. Across the water, we could see the lights of Arlington. About a mile to our left was the bascule bridge. We could have gone there, but it was late and I'm sure Gerard didn't have the energy to go climb up a bridge with me.
We sat in the tall grass together on a small hill overlooking the river. Most of our chatter has been replaced by a comfortable silence by now. Exhaustion has got the best of us.
"Thank you for tonight, Frankie," Gerard murmured. This broke our silence. I shifted my gaze over to him. This exact moment brought me back to when I first met this man. The moonlight softly highlighted every sharp feature from his browline to his chin. I think I'm falling in love again.
"Of course," I replied. Oh, before I forget... I dug into the pocket of my jacket and produced the second corsage I purchased for Gerard. I took his hand so that I could slide on the corsage. It fit pretty well to my surprise.
"Oh, you-- you bought one!" He seemed genuinely surprised. He lifted his wrist slightly to view it better. I hope he noticed the flower I picked.
"I picked out the pansy," I explained. "It was the flower you liked, right?"
I never got an answer. Gerard was moved to tears at this point, but why? Was the gesture too nice?
"Gerard?"
Still no answer. Instead, I received a tiny cry.
"No one has ever been this nice to me."
Those words struck my heart. No one? I moved closer to him and took his hand into mine. As I laced our fingers together, he brought his gaze onto me. "I've lived the cliche unpopular high school life. I wasn't like the other guys, you know? I liked art, I liked music, I liked fashion. To this old-school town, I was just some weird kid, some outsider. I never felt like I belonged. On top of that, I could never find any friends. My only friend was my brother. He's younger than me, about 3 years. Only he understood me and liked the things I liked. And since I never had friends, I never got a girlfriend. I had thought girls never liked me, so maybe...maybe boys did. That was a mistake on my part," He frowned now and looked away. "Those idiotic jocks...you don't want to know what they did." His brows knit together. Whatever they did, it must've been an awful experience. I squeezed Gerard's hand. "It's why I dropped out early and became the mess I am today. I mean...look at me—" He gestured over himself with a disgusted look. "I'm wearing a skirt! Only girls wear skirts."
As soon as those words left his mouth, I shook my head. "We can wear skirts too," I said calmly. "Besides, I think it fits you. You look stunning." Gerard looked me in the eye again. This time something completely new was on his face. Was that love?
"I can't possibly look great," He muttered. Oh, what will it take to get through his thick skull? I was done with the "attempts" and the questioning. I wanted to feel something new. I'm sick of the doubt and worry that always held me back. This time I'm going all in. I gave Gerard's hand another squeeze as I leaned over to plant a soft kiss on those lips I had always stared at.
Kissing another man was different than I'd imagine. I always thought it would be the same as kissing a woman, but boy was I wrong. It almost felt as if I were kissing myself. Gerard wasn't just any normal man though. His lips felt soft yet a little on the wetter side. It's like they've never seen a chapped day. The only strange part about this was that it felt completely natural. I thought that if I gave in, the Heavens would open above us and the angels would smite us for a homosexual act. However, that never happened.
I parted our kiss now, and as I sat back, I noticed Gerard has been moved to tears. He was happy though. He wore a thin, curved smile at me, and it felt genuine. At that moment, I felt as if my feelings have finally been reciprocated.
"Where have you been my entire life?" He whispered. "I wish I knew you before..."
"Me too." My answer surprised me. For some reason, I did wish I had met Gerard before all of this. Though tonight was magical, I wished we had more time together.
Gerard let my hand go so that he could cup the side of my face. He still wore that thin smile. His eyes glanced over every feature of me. "You're always saying I'm beautiful, but I think you're the beautiful one, Frankie. You don't give yourself enough credit."
"Neither do you."
He laughed softly. "Oh, there's nothing to like about me," He said. Now his eyes focused on mine. "If only I could draw you right now. I think you'd see how beautiful you are then."
How I wish we could stay in this moment forever. I would be happy to escape the daily hustle and bustle of my everyday life to live a more carefree life with Gerard.
"Do you have a place?"
"Of course I do!" Gerard laughed at my question. "Do you think I just roam the streets like a homeless person?"
I blushed, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you." Gerard waved me off as if to dismiss my apology. He stood up now, but our hands were still holding one another. Not a word escaped his lips as he led me back into the heart of Belleville. We took all sorts of twists and turns on the streets before coming across a small, rundown neighborhood. Although its appearance wasn't the best, it also wasn't the worst neighborhood in Belleville. It was livable, and that was all that could be said about this part of town.
Alas, we reached the place Gerard has been leading me too. Appearance-wise, I could tell it was in a much better condition than the other homes we passed. It had a new coat of paint on its siding and front porch. The roof looked reshingled as well. I took notice that the lawn was freshly mowed too. At least some people had some decency.
I followed Gerard up to the porch. Before we stepped inside though, I took a hold of Gerard's arm. "Is anyone else staying here?" I needed to ask in case I had to introduce myself.
"Yeah, just my brother," He assured. "I'm sure he's just sleeping right now though." With those words hanging in the air now, he stepped into the house and led me through the hallway to his room. Once inside, I closed the door behind me as softly as I could. Near the bed, Gerard shimmied off his skirt and grabbed a pair of raggedy jeans off his bed. There was an assortment of different clothes scattered on his bed. Something about it was more artistic than messy.
"Sorry for the mess," Gerard said quietly. "I'm not really tidy."
"Me neither," I smiled. An effort to reassure him. I took a seat next to him on the bed and took a glance around the room. His room isn't really that bad. I think it's comfortable. Of course, it could use some cleaning. I rested my gaze on Gerard now and gave him a smile again. 
"Did you wanna sleep?" He blushed, his head ducking slightly. I could tell he felt awkward, and honestly, I did too. "Sure," I said. "I can sleep on the floor if you want."
"No, it's fine," He blurted. "I mean, my bed's big enough anyway." He got himself situated underneath the bed covers. His eyes met mine afterward, and he raised a brow. Taking the cue, I shrugged off my jacket and untied my tie. When I felt I was comfortable enough, I crawled over to the other side of the bed and laid down. We were both turned on our sides to where we were looking at each other. There was silence for about a good minute until he spoke up.
"I wonder how Mikey's gonna react to you," He said with a growing smile. 
I shrugged my shoulder and I gave him a slight smile. "I don't know, maybe he'll like me."
"Heh, well, he's shy, so talk carefully." 
I nodded. We fell into another silence but it was more comfortable than awkward. I wasn't sure when I dozed off...
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soundsof71 · 4 years ago
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Hey! Album: 'Fleetwood Mac' (1975) - Fleetwood Mac
Hey! Great to hear from you! You (and your previous blog) were my original inspiration for trying to raise my tumblr game to something intentionally curated, and more than that, personally creative. Sorry to have let you down. LOL
What a pleasure to talk about this one, though, an album I think is -- strangely enough -- one of the most underrated albums in the classic rock pantheon!
What’s that you say? An album with “Rhiannon” and “Landslide” underrated?!?! Well it’s true, seriously underrated, at least partly because those two stellar, nay, legendary songs are the first ones that most people think of. There's so much more! It's definitely my favorite Fleetwood Mac album!
My perspective is a little different than the standard rap that Fleetwood Mac didn't properly begin until those two California kids joined the band in 1975, because to me, they started taking off when their first American joined the band, Bob Welch in 1971 for Future Games, which I wrote about at some length here. 
(For the record, Future Games is my second favorite Fleetwood Mac album. Anyone who hasn't checked it out really needs to.)
I’ll leave it at that for now, except to observe that to most of my music nerd friends at the time, I was a latecomer to Fleetwood Mac the band, having completely missed their earlier, bluesier lineups. Indeed, the 1971 lineup was their 8th! And they'd come to #9 in 1972, before landing on lineup #10 in 1975.
They had a bunch of hits on the five albums in this 71-74 range (”Hypnotized” is one that still slays me) that I think hold up as among their best ever. While the album before Fleetwood Mac, Heroes Are Hard to Find didn’t have a hit single, it rose to #34 on the US charts, and got plenty of attention. 
My point is that Fleetwood Mac didn’t spring into existence out of nowhere in 1975. Nor was 1975 necessarily ground zero for the millions of people who bought the album Fleetwood Mac. It came out in the summer of ‘75, but took 15 months to hit #1 in the US! (It peaked at #11 in the UK.) This was a far bigger album in 1976 when all the singles came out, and the band was touring like crazy to support it.
They basically dragged the album to the top of the charts kicking and screaming by the end of THAT year with relentless touring, setting the stage for their true commercial breakthrough with Rumours in 1977, but artistically? I prefer everything about 1975′s Fleetwood Mac.
btw, the music nerds know that Fleetwood Mac was recorded at Sound City Studios, which makes all the difference in the telling of the tale. In 1974, the band had located to Los Angeles, and following the departure of Bob Welch in December, Mick Fleetwood went looking for both a recording studio and a guitarist. 
While getting to know producer Keith Olsen at Sound City (a studio legendary for its drum sound, among other things), Keith played Mick some tracks from an album he’d recorded here a couple of years earlier with a local guitarist and his girlfriend singer, both of whom were also songwriters.
Mick said, I’ll book the studio to record my next album, I’ll book you to produce, and I’ll hire the guitarist....who famously informed Mick that he and his girlfriend were a package deal. All of this happened because of Sound City Studios.
(Here's Mick recording this very album in this very studio.)
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Your friend and mine Dave Grohl directed a FANTASTIC documentary about Sound City Studios, a kind of a dump to be honest, but where tons of phenomenal records were made, from After The Gold Rush to Caribou, Damn The Torpedoes, Nevermind, Rage Against The Machine, and most recently, Phoebe Bridgers’ Punisher. Lots and lots of stories about the making of Fleetwood Mac in this movie, and much more. 
Here’s the trailer. The whole movie is available on YT, too! And Amazon Prime, and a bunch of other places. HIGHLY recommended!
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So here we go taking directly about Fleetwood Mac.....
the first song from the album i heard: "Over My Head". This was the first single released in the US, remarkably, four months after the album was released! I dunno, did the label not want to sell any albums? Or did they just not get how catchy these tunes were? I have no idea.
And ironically, the band didn't like the choice of "Over My Head" at all, ranking it dead-last in their own considerations of likely singles! I think that this is evidence that they were using heavy drugs much earlier than we thought. LOL
"Over My Head" peaked at #20 in the US, their highest to date by far, although, in some defense of the band's reservations, didn't chart at all in the UK. Saying that it rose to "only" 20 in the charts doesn't begin to describe how heavily it was played, though. A LOT.
do i own the album: Did then, Spotify now. The answer for most of the albums in this round of Asks. :-)
my favorite song: "Over My Head". Look, I admit that this is insane when Fleetwood Mac also includes "Landslide" and "Rhiannon." "Landslide" in particular is maybe one of the greatest songs anyone has ever written, and every single person reading this knows somebody named Rhiannon because of that song. (I've met two.) And hey, "Say You Love Me" was a MUCH bigger hit at the time too... but I'm tellin' ya, "Over My Head" fucks. 
It's the single version that fucks hardest, though, no doubt about it. I was disappointed when I finally bought the album that the version there fades in (NO! THIS IS WRONG) and has a wide mix that diffuses the impact. The radio version is so tight that it's practically mono, and it punches you right upside the head. 
One of my favorite things about listening to "Over My Head" in the past couple of weeks for this Ask is that it's Old School Fleetwood Mac. Chris on piano, Mick on drums, and John McVie with what might be the best bassline that anyone stroked out in 1975. My god, it's a fucking monster, and it just gets hotter as the song progresses. By the end, it's on fire, and you hear it so much better in this tight single mix.
The new guy adds a nice little solo on top of a nice rhythm lick, and he and Stevie add background vocals, but they're not front and center. "Over My Head" is really Christine McVie's showcase, although Fleetwood and Mac really shine too. This would have been a monster hit without the new kids, as indeed it pretty much was. You could say the same thing about "Say You Love Me", which is also all about Christine's songcraft, and a voice like no other, then or now.
Here's my edit of a lovely Mick Putland photo of Christine McVie from a couple of years earlier.
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I guarantee that it's been way too long since you heard the in-your-face single version of "Over My Head". On Spotify, you can find it on the couple of Deluxe Editions of Fleetwood Mac (here's one), and it's also on the anthology, The Very Best of Fleetwood Mac, which I've embedded here. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gw-lIt1ILzk
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least favorite song: "I'm So Afraid." I'm so afraid not. LOL
a song I didn’t like at first, but now do: Hmm, I might put "Sugar Daddy" in that category, but honestly, the main thing I don't like about this song is the title. LOL But it's the 4th best Christine McVie song on an album where the best three of hers were all released as singles, so I guess it all works out.
a song I used to like, but now don’t: Anything by the new guy. I'm not going to go into detail here because what I love about this album, I still love. At the time, I dug two of his songs here (you can guess which two, surely), but I started to really despise this guy a few years later. Now, I can't listen to anything where he's prominent at all, on any Fleetwood Mac records.
Fortunately there are more than enough Christine and Stevie songs, and Mick and John's playing, plus all those earlier albums like Future Games, to keep Fleetwood Mac in the rock good pantheon. I'd have fired the new guy 30 years earlier than he was. 
favorite lyric:
Mirror in the sky
What is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changin' ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?
Well, I've been afraid of changin'
'Cause I've built my life around you
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm getting older too
Like I said, the two Stevie Nicks tracks on Fleetwood Mac deserve every bit of the love they've gotten over the years. You can also see with just a quick glance around my blog that she's one of my most-posted artists. Please don't take me repping Christine as any disrespect for Stevie!
Do I like "Landslide" a little more than I otherwise might because it's specifically about outgrowing the aforementioned new guy? Maybe.  Or do I like it a little less than I otherwise might because I can't hear it without thinking of him? Maybe that too.
overall rating out of 10: Then: 9.4. Now: 9. The new guy went 2-for-4 for my money at the time, and the two that he whiffed on are genuinely terrible...but as bad as those two clunkers were, the rest of the album seemed perfect to me. Certainly among my most-played mainstream rock records into the early 80s. I was perfectly fine skipping one song on each side.
Even though nowadays I can't stand any of the songs he sings lead on, you take those off, and you STILL have "Landslide", "Rhiannon", "Say You Love Me", "Over My Head", and "Warm Ways". No album with ALL THOSE on them gets less than an 8.5, right?
I'm adding a few tenths each for how tightly Fleetwood and Mac are locked into each other and these songs on rythm (easily the most underrated duo of the era, sez me), and Keith Olsen's immaculate production. The score of 9 is therefore objectively correct and mathematically unassailable. LOL
I'm going to end where I began, by talking about Christine McVie. Instead of listening to this first and foremost as an album with a couple of giant Stevie Nicks songs, listen again to Fleetwood Mac as Christine McVie really lighting things up. She deserves so much more credit for the band's success than she gets, and seriously, "Over My Head" fucks. 
Now looky here, @aluacrescente . I know that YOU have strong feelings about this record, so spill! And the rest of you, too! I don't intend to have the last word on the albums in any of these Asks! Just the first one. :-) So lemme know what YOU think!
PS. Apologies for any formatting weirdness! I started this on desktop, where I do all my writing, saved the first few paragraphs to come back to later, only to be told by tumblr that I'd stated this on the app (DID NOT) and could only edit there. Grrr. Not cool, @staff. I've spent another day just tweaking to make it somewhat readable and wondering how these people can be so bad at their jobs. LOL
My crackpot opinions and wobbly writing are my own of course, and I'm aware that they have a larger negative impact on readability than tumblr's incompetence by far. LOL
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putschki1969 · 4 years ago
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KEIKO SPICE Interview ~ English Translation
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Note: Once again this is a very long and icredibly insightful interview, so please enjoy it! As always, take everything you read with a grain of salt, my Japanese is by no means perfect. If you want to use this translation or parts of it, be sure to CREDIT me and LINK to this post.
KEIKO ~ Looking beyond Kalafina and finding her music as a solo newcomer, “With everyone’s help I will be able to know what kind of music I seek”
Former Kalafina member KEIKO has released her first solo album "Lantana" on December 2nd. With this work you can fully enjoy high-quality pop-music and additionally it is packed to the brink with KEIKO’s ideas and thoughts in her role as solo vocalist. KEIKO has taken the first step into her future career as a solo artist, we have asked her to share what kind of thoughts went into the making of her album. Here are her insights accompanied by some exclusive stills from the interview.
Everything that has happened this year inspired the lyrics I wrote for “Nanairo no Finale”, the song which Kajiura-san composed for me
―― On the occasion of your 1st album "Lantana" having been released on December 2nd,  I would like to ask you a few questions. 
Please go ahead. 
―― First of all, the album title "Lantana" is the name of a flower, right? May I ask why you chose this particular title? 
This album took about a year to produce, we worked without having a concept, I just chose the songs based on whether I liked them and wanted to give them a try. Additionally I received many suggestions during discussions with my staff members. So rather than focussing on the overall concept of the album we would like everyone to pay attention to the individual tracks. In Japanese the name of the flower "Lantana" literally means "Seven Changes". As the name suggests, this album represents many changes. So on the one hand the title reflects those changes and on the other hand, I just really like flowers so the name seemed fitting. Also, I wonder if we chose the name  because it has a pleasant ring to it? These are pretty much the reasons why "Lantana" became our album title, it was a very quick decision actually. 
―― I thought that there was a connection between all the songs of the album, the flow felt really beautiful but now that you have explained all of this to me I find the album even more interesting because there is truly so much variety, each song is completely different. is. In addition to the songs you picked to include in the album, were there many other pieces you liked among all the options you got to choose from?
Well ... This year, partly because of coronavirus, the album production was quite flexible. After it was decided that we would be doing a live-stream concert, we reconsidered a few things since we thought it might be better to increase the number of up-beat songs suitable for a live performance. Since the album production and the live performance were happening pretty much simultaneously, we made some big changes to the album to accommodate our needs for the live performance. As a result, I think it became a very well-balanced album. 
―― During the MC of the live stream you mentioned something like "ff it weren't for Corona, it might have been an album with a lot of darker songs" *laughs*. 
"Dark" is maybe a bit misleading *laughs*. I guess a little “more mature” is the word I was looking for? 
―― But with a darker vibe? 
Yeah, that’s what I had in mind but it turned into something completely different. 
―― Considering all of that, has your approach to and understanding of music changed at all due to coronavirus? 
I think the biggest change for me was that I could no longer sing my songs live in front of everyone ... I can't meet my fans. Not being able to meet the fans...it’s not only difficult for the fans but also for all the artists, after all this connection is very motivating and inspiring. So to have all the fans waiting but not being able to go out there and perform for them is very discouraging, you are just cut off...that was definitely the biggest change.  
―― But you did get the opportunity to do a live stream. How was it? There were a few fans at the venue, right? 
It was a lot of fun! When I first heard that there was a limited capacity of around 72 people due to coronavirus, I was wondering what kind of live concert it would be, but I was very happy to have at least a few people there because the feeling is completely different if you have someone actually there right in front of you listening to your singing. When I was in my early twenties I would sometimes perform in front of Cinema ROSA in Ikebukuro, back then we had like 5 fans coming to see us. I was reminded of  that feeling. 
―― Was there something burning inside of you, yearning to be released? 
Yes ... At the day of the live I realised how many strong feelings I had suppressed before, when I was finally standing in front of the audience, all those feelings were overflowing. I truly experienced a welling up of feelings and sensation on that day. I felt excited and inspired from the early morning onwards. 
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―― Returning to our original topic, your album, as you said, there is a lot of variety.  You once mentioned, "it's like ... like a box of my favourite chocolates." 
Hahaha, that's right, I said that *laughs*. 
―― I think there were many challenges in terms of song variety, but are there any songs that were particularly challenging for you? 
I saw all of it as a big challenge for me. That's why I was so adamant to try as many new things as possible. With all songs I felt like I wanted to try and sing them and then later I was deciding how to use my voice in each song. 
―― Did you have any difficulties regarding your singing technique? 
I think the most difficult must have been “Nanairo no Finale”, I don’t even know how many takes I did until the final result. After all, this is Kajiura-san's song. It's only natural that it would feel completely different to me compared to all the other songs. 
―― Well ... yes. 
I have been singing Kajiura-san's songs consistently for about 12 years now, ever since I got to sing “Kaze no Machi he” for her as solo singer FictionJunction KEIKO  I have been determined to do my very best, I felt like I had to give even more than before, I wanted to provide the best singing possible, I guess I was just very frustrated.  “Please let me try and sing it again?” I was really stubborn like that when it came to “Nanairo no Finale”. 
―― You know, I was really surprised to see “Nanairo no Finale” as the second track on the album. 
Oh *laughs*. Really? 
―― Didn’t you sing it as an ecore during your live performance? 
Oh, that's right. 
―― When I listened to the album without paying too much attention to the track order, I thought that having “Inochi no Hana” at the end was quite fitting. But to have “Nanairo no FInale” as the second track?! What? I was completely taken aback by that, it had a really strong impact on me in that particular position. 
Hooray! I am happy to hear that *laughs*. 
―― Regarding the song order, you mentioned earlier that you didn’t make this album with a particular concept in mind, the flow wasn’t as important to you, instead you wanted people to listen carefully to each individual song. 
But I do think there is a flow when it comes to the track order. I came up with a draft first and then consulted with everyone else. Everyone agreed that we would start with "Be Yourself" but we wondered how to continue. 
―― Indeed, "Be Yourself" definitely feels right as the leading track. 
I had this idea of putting a very uplifting song right in the beginning, I wanted everyone to feel positive energy right from the get-go. I chose these three songs up till "Hajimari wa" as an introduction to my album because I thought they would make the listeners feel a sense of lightness and brightness. 
――  “Nanairo no Finale” was composed by Kajiura-san and written by you, it has a very strong Kajiura-feel to it, even a sort of Kalafina vibe if you listen closely but it’s also very reminiscent of many of the up-tempo FictionJunction songs. It really seems to have been custom-made for you. How was it to write the lyrics for this song? 
At first, I was a little surprised when I was told that I should be writing the lyrics. 
―― Was that a suggestion from Kajiura-san? 
Yes, the suggestion came from her. This song was a team effort, first of all I discussed it with my producer Yoda-san, then it was eventually decided that Kajiura-san would be in charge of the composition and she suggested that it would be interesting if the arrangements and lyrics were done by someone else. When I first heard of that idea I was quite shocked. 
―― The pressure was intense? 
Yes, definitely. When she told me I was like, “eh?” and literally froze. 
―― So did she send you the song and then you wrote the lyrics for it? 
Pretty much, yes. To start with, Kajiura-san sent me a song sample, at that point nothing much had been set into stone yet, the key and such still had to be decided but I really wanted to sing it as soon as possible. So I tried all kinds of singing and then suggested a few arrangement ideas to the arranger Nobuyuki Shimizu, we really thought carefully about every little detail. The arrangement changed steadily, the final result is very different from the song I originally received from Kajiura-san at the beginning, we changed the tempo and key quite a bit. 
―― I see. 
It was a challenge indeed but Kajiura-san told me it was very interesting to see the changes this song had gone through. As we kept changing the arrangement, the lyrics naturally changed a bit too. However, when I initially received the song from Kajiura-san I was immediately envisioning the protagonist looking ahead at a very positive and bright future, so that aspect of the lyrics hasn't changed at all. From the beginning, I had that particular image in mind, I hoped to write lyrics that would portray a positive outlook towards the future.
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―― When I listened to this song live, I felt like so many things were put into motion. It's a song that feels bright but it’s also filled with determination. 
That’s to be expected since the Olympics influenced me strongly. I wrote this song in the summer when coronavirus was ever present. Seeing all those athletes in the media made me very emotional. They are all so very determined to strive for next year’s Olympics even though it is still uncertain if they will even take place. I wrote my lyrics with the hope of providing a positive message for those who are working hard right now. 
―― It really touches the heart. 
If it hadn’t been for all those things happening this year, I don’t think these lyrics would have been written.
―― They really reflect the state our world is in right now. 
Yes. Our current situation is something that cannot be ignored, it's hard to write a song that’s all fun and “yay” in times like this *laughs*. You hesitate to make something too lighthearted. But I also didn't want it to be too negative, so I wrote hopeful lyrics like this. 
―― Starting to write your own lyrics with a song like that, putting all those feelings into words, I guess one could say you created something that can be left to posterity? 
Yes, I felt very grateful for that opportunity.
During my time in Kalafina, my role was very clear
―― You also wrote the lyrics for the song “Yugao” in this album so I would like to hear what you have to say about this. 
This is the last song we recorded. At the beginning of the album production, I knew I wanted to include something short, a minimalistic song, like a short story but then we had the live performance to think about and all of a sudden the entire tracklist had already been decided ... But I still chose this song because I was adamant about having something like this on the album. 
―― I see. 
For the most part the songs on my album have a pretty nice standard melody, nothing out of the ordinary so I felt like singing a sad and transient melody. It was an obvious choice that felt natural because that sort of music resonates with me. I looked at all kinds of songs for this album and in particular I wanted something calm, something you could fall asleep to while listening to the melody, vocals and lyrics. 
―― Since it is in the latter half of the album, before "End Roll" and "Change The World's Color", I thought it was a very beautiful sort of overture. It’s a nice transition to two up-beat songs. Absorbing energy in a relaxed manner right before speeding up. 
I thought it would be nice little surprise to have “Yugao” lead right into  "End Roll" *laughs*. 
―― As for "End Roll" and "Change The World's Color", I feel like your infamous strong physical presence is back with these two songs *laughs*. 
Everyone, get up! *Laughs* Yes, you really feel a sense of waking-up. 
―― In the middle part of the album there is a section of songs with beautiful melodies such as "Akane", "Tameiki no Kieru Machi" and "Ray". I got the impression that you really challenged yourself with quieter songs like this.
I agree. That may be the case. 
―― Is that reflected in all of your music? 
Yes. I have faced many challenges because this was my 1st album, I just wanted to try a lot of things. I'm sure in the future I will have a clearer vision of what I want to do. But this particular album is filled with all the things I am currently capable of doing. 
―― Do you feel like you are experimenting? 
Yes. I won’t know what kind of things I like and what I'm looking for without piling up experiences ... I've been doing Kalafina for 10 years, and I've been doing FictionJunction for about 12 years so I am confident in myself when it comes to these activities but as a solo artist I am basically a first-grader *laughs*. 
―― So it’s like you are starting from scratch learning the alphabet all over again? 
Yes exactly.  But of course technically speaking I am not a newcomer when it comes to singing and being a vocalist. As for the kind of music I want to sing in the future, first and foremost this album was about trying new things and finding out how everyone around me reacts to it, ultimately I would like to make something that makes everyone happy.
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―― You have obviously had a big career so far. So of course the image from that time is still in people’s minds even now that you are a solo artist. Without trying to make it sound bad but  I think there are many fans out there who look at things from a biased point of view, they have these preconceived notions of what exactly the solo careers of each Kalafina member should look like. 
That's right. 
―― I guess there are two types of ways to handle these sorts of expectations, either you are the type that just goes ahead in a determined manner regardless of what everyone else thinks, along the lines of, “I am going to do exactly this and that. Period!” Or one can find a different approach along the lines of, “I want to try various things, how do you feel about this?" Before you went solo I actually had the impression that you would be the first type, thinking, "okay, this is the music I made and because I made it everyone should listen to it!" However, I was surprised to find out  that you are actually more like the second type.  
Yes. I am definitely the second type. I have zero idea what I want and I am not at all scared to admit that. I think it’s best to ask everyone around me for assistance to work through all the things that I do not know at this point in time. 
―― It's simple, isn't it? 
Yes it is. During my time in Kalafina, my role and my duties were very clear, we had wishes and aspirations lined up, once we had reached a certain goal and seen the results we just moved to the next step. But right now I am at a starting point and I have not seen any results yet so I think it's natural for me to go take this route. 
―― I see. 
Going around and asking everyone for their opinion is something we also did in the early days of Kalafina. So I thought I would start at that point once again . It's different from Kalafina though. That's why it's interesting, and the feeling of creating something together is a lot of fun. Creating sounds, creating harmonies. 
―― Harmonies? 
As in chorus arrangement. You can enhance the chorus pretty flexibly on the spot if you want. While working on my singing I consulted a lot with my producer Yoda-san and my assistant Asami-chan, together we added a lot more oomph to many of the choruses, I sang some parts and we also tried mixing and subtracting...I was really absorbed in the whole process of creating something together.  
―― It seems to be very interesting to make so many changes on the spot. 
I felt a strong desire to create spontaneous music like that. If everyone involved feels inspired while working together, then I think it’s best to go with the ideas that are born during these sessions. 
―― And you will wait till the very end to share your opinion. 
Yes, I am the last one. I am literally just watching everyone all the time wondering about how we should do all of this  *laughs*.
I will approach the challenge of a big venue at a slow pace
―― Hearing you talk about all of this, it seems like you are having fun with your solo activities. 
It is a lot of fun. 
―― We as fans are also incredibly happy to see you enjoying yourself while making music. So your album contains a total of 10 songs, and at the end there is a bonus track, an acoustic version of "Akane". May I ask you why you decided to include this? 
During the production, I listened to a take with just my voice and the guitar. At one point, Yoda-san had edited "Akane" in such a way that all rhythmic sections were gone. I suggested that it would be nice to hear an arrangement with only the strings, since I thought it would be very calming. Then Kosuke Oshima, who composed the strings part, dramatically changed the melody of the strings so that's why I wanted to include this version as well. 
―― So once again this idea was born spontaneously in the midst of production rather than having been planned from the get-go. 
Yes. We just all agreed that the melody of “Akane” was beautiful with a simple arrangement like that and the strings are perfectly complementing it. 
―― When you compare the two versions, the acoustic one definitely sounds more dramatic. 
The strings are pretty intense and the melody lines are dramatic so I really like it! I love the final result! 
―― That’s really amazing. You pretty much did that song on a whim. A song born out of a spontaneous session.
I think we have created an album that feels like a real team effort. 
―― I think you had a similar working environment during your activities as Kalafina but it's the first time for you as a solo artist to bring up ideas such as, "why don’t we try to include this song?" 
No, not at all. We didn’t really have that with Kalafina. This is truly the first time for me because during our time in Kalafina we only ever received a finished song which we were then asked to bring to life. But we were never involved in the recording of musical instruments or anything like that.
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―― To celebrate the release of “Lantana” a live performance is scheduled for December 16 at Zepp DiverCity TOKYO. How hyped are you about that? 
To say I am not hyped at all would be a lie *laughs*. But I am honestly not that hyped. However, it is an opportunity to meet everyone which is a great thing so I want to do my very best performing live. Everyone has worked really hard this year, it’s been a tough year for sure so I want to convey all those feelings through my singing.
―― It's that time of the year where everyone is busy and needs to get all of their work done. 
Instead of being super hyped or nervous I want my audience at the venue and all the live stream viewers to feel a sense of relief, “ah yes, the year is almost over”. My fans should be able to relax and detox, hopefully my live will be a source of energy for them to survive the last few remaining days of 2020, I guess I just want everyone to try and escape from busy reality. Hopefully I can make everyone laugh *laughs*. 
―― Sounds great. 
Since I am doing my live so soon after the album release I thought it would be fitting to use a hugelive house like Zepp as my venue, I wanted to invite as many people as possible and have them sprinkled all across the hall to keep everyone safe.
―― You are pretty much standing alone and separated from everyone else. The same was done for your previous live. Of course you have the band members on stage but still... During your Kalafina days you always had the other two members next to you and in FictionJunction you stand on stage as one singer among many. How is it to stand in the middle of the stage all by yourself? 
Even before Kalafina I was part of a unit so this is truly the first time for me being all alone on stage. But I always feel like I am making music together with all the musicians, so I never really felt lonely. 
―― Yes of course, the band members. 
If I just had a backing track. Or if I hadn’t known the musicians behind me on stage, then yes, I might have felt alone. But we all worked together during my first live to create my solo music with as much care as possible. It was like having a session with my musician, so I really didn't feel alone. 
―― I think you may try to perform at bigger venues in the future. 
I think it’s okay to go step by step, slowly *laughs*. It’s totally fine to take very small steps. 
―― So you are not eager to perform in bigger venues? 
No. If anything, I want to have fun, this is my highest priority at the moment. How do I best enjoy music with my audience? This is what I feel strongly about. 
―― I think that’s great. 
Rather than thinking about producing a big live I just want to create a simple place where everyone can enjoy music together.
―― When I was listening to you album I got a strong jazz vibe from your song “Tameiki no Kieru Machi”. 
Oh yes, it definitely has that sort of vibe. 
―― Listening to you explaining all of your ideas, this song immediately came to mind when you mentioned  the “session feeling”. You kept saying in this interview how very much you enjoyed the exchange between yourself and everyone around you, how everything has become some sort of team project, was everything like that? 
Before recording my songs, especially in the early days before I had recorded "Hajimari wa" and "Ray", I wasn't used to recording with a new singing style so I was incredibly scared ... I vividly remember that feeling *laughs*. 
―― So there were some terrifying parts as well? 
To be honest, I was really scared. It was my first time using such a voice. It was unlike anything I had done in the past.  Rather than just blindly providing my vocals we created my voice together, I would constantly be asking, “should I sing like this or maybe like that?” 
―― I feel like it is very worthwhile to listen to this album, no matter how many times you listen you will always experience a new special flavour. Last but not least I would like you to say a few words to everyone who has been supporting you for a long time.
I've been working as a vocalist for Kalafina for 10 years but this time for the very first time I have created an album that’s made up of songs that I really wanted to sing. I would be happy if I could touch your hearts and find a way to connect with everyone through this album. Let’s end this year with a live concert! There is also a live stream available so please, let's spend some time together, I will be awaiting you ♪ Thank you for reading this interview.
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sinceileftyoublog · 3 years ago
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Pitchfork Music Festival 2021 Preview: 15 Can’t-miss Acts
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black midi; Photo by YIS KID
BY JORDAN MAINZER
While yours truly won’t be attending Pitchfork Music Festival this year, SILY contributor Daniel Palella will be covering the actual fest. If I was attending, though, these would be the acts I’d make sure to see. 5 from each day, no overlaps, so you could conceivably see everyone listed.
FRIDAY
Armand Hammer, 1:00 PM, Green Stage
Earlier this year, New York hip hop duo Armand Hammer released their 5th album Haram (BackwoodzStudioz) in collaboration with on-fire producer The Alchemist. It was the duo’s (ELUCID and Billy Woods) first time working with a singular producer on a record (though Earl Sweatshirt produced a track), and likewise, The Alchemist actually tailored his beats towards the two MCs. Haram is the exact kind of hip hop that succeeds early in the day at a festival, verbose and complex rhymes over languid, cloudy, sample-heavy beats, when attendees are more likely to want to sit and listen than dance. And you’re going to want to listen to Armand Hammer, whose MCs’ experiential words frame the eerie hues of the production. “Dreams is dangerous, linger like angel dust,” Woods raps on opener “Sir Benni Miles”, never looking back as he and Elucid’s stream-of-consciousness rhymes cover everything from colonization to Black bodily autonomy and the dangers of satisfaction disguised as optimism. (“We let BLM be the new FUBU,” raps Quelle Chris on “Chicharrones”; “Iridescent blackness / Is this performative or praxis?” ponders Woods on “Black Sunlight”.)  There are moments of levity on Haram, like KAYANA’s vocal turn on “Black Sunlight” and the “what the hell sound is this?” type sampling that dominates warped, looped tracks like “Peppertree” and “Indian Summer”, built around sounds of horns and twirling flute lines. For the most part, Haram is an album of empathetic realism. “Hurt people hurt people,” raps Elucid on “Falling Out of the Sky”, a stunning encapsulation of Armand Hammer’s world where humanism exists side-by-side with traumatic death and feelings of revenge.
You can also catch Armand Hammer doing a live set on the Vans Channel 66 livestream at 12 PM on Saturday.
Dogleg, 1:45 PM, Red Stage
It feels like we’ve been waiting years to see this set, and actually, we have! The four-piece punk band from Michigan was supposed to play last year’s cancelled fest in support of their searing debut Melee (Triple Crown), and a year-plus of pent up energy is sure to make songs like “Bueno”, “Fox”, and “Kawasaki Backflip” all the more raging. Remember: This is a band whose reputation was solidified live before they were signed to Triple Crown and released their breakout album. Seeing them is the closest thing to a no-brainer that this year’s lineup offers.
Revisit our interview with Dogleg from last year, and catch them at an aftershow on Saturday at Subterranean with fellow Pitchfork performer Oso Oso and Retirement Party.
Hop Along, 3:20 PM, Red Stage
Though lead singer Frances Quinlan released a very good solo album last year, it’s been three years since their incredible band Hop Along dropped an album and two years since they’ve toured. 2018′s Bark Your Head Off, Dog (Saddle Creek), one of our favorite albums of that year, should comprise the majority of their setlist, but maybe they have some new songs?
Catch them at an aftershow on Saturday at Metro with Varsity and Slow Mass.
black midi, 4:15 PM, Green Stage
The band who had the finest debut of 2019 and gave the best set of that year at Pitchfork is back. Cavalcade (Rough Trade) is black midi’s sophomore album, methodical in its approach in contrast with the improvisational absurdism of Schlagenheim. Stop-start, violin-laden lead single and album opener “John L”, a song about a cult leader whose members turn on him, is as good a summary as ever of the dark, funky eclecticism of black midi, who on Cavalcade saw band members leave and new ones enter, their ever shapeshifting sound the only consistent thing about them. A song like the jazzy “Diamond Stuff” is likely impossible to replicate live--its credits list everything from 19th century instruments to household kitchen items used for percussion--but is key to experiencing their instrumental adventurousness. On two-and-a-half-minute barn burner “Hogwash and Balderdash,” they for the first time fully lean into their fried Primus influences, telling a tale of two escaped prisoners, “two chickens from the pen.” At the same time, this band is still black midi, with moments that call back to Schlagenheim, the churning, metallic power chords via jittery, slapping funk of “Chondromalacia Patella” representative of their quintessential tempo changes. And as on songs like Schlagenheim’s “Western”, black midi find room for beauty here, too, empathizing with the pains of Marlene Dietrich on a bossa nova tune named after her, Geordie Greep’s unmistakable warble cooing sorrowful lines like, “Fills the hall tight / And pulls at our hearts / And puts in her place / The girl she once was.” Expect to hear plenty from Cavalcade but also some new songs; after all, this is a band that road tests and experiments with material before recording it.
Catch them doing a 2 PM DJ set on Vans Channel 66 on Saturday and at an aftershow on Monday at Sleeping Village.
Yaeji, 7:45 PM, Blue Stage
What We Drew (XL), the debut mixtape from Brooklyn-based DJ Yaeji, was one of many dance records that came out after lockdown that we all wished we could experience in a crowd as opposed to at home alone. Now's our chance to bask in all of its glory under a setting sun. Maybe she’ll spin her masterful remix of Dua Lipa’s “Don’t Start Now” from the Club Future Nostalgia remix album, or her 2021 single “PAC-TIVE”, her and DiAN’s collaboration with Pac-Man company Namco.
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Angel Olsen; Photo by Dana Trippe
SATURDAY
Bartees Strange, 1:45 PM, Red Stage
One of our favorite albums of last year was Live Forever (Memory Music), the debut from singer-songwriter and The National fanatic Bartees Strange, one that contributor Lauren Lederman called “a declaration of an artist’s arrival.” He’s certainly past arrived when you take into account his busy 2021, releasing a new song with Lorenzo Wolff and offering his remix services to a number of artists, including illuminati hotties and fellow Pitchfork performer (and tour mate) Phoebe Bridgers. Expect to hear lots of Live Forever during his Pitchfork set, one of many sets at the fest featuring exciting young guitar-based (!) bands.
Catch him at a free (!!) aftershow on Monday at Empty Bottle with Ganser.
Faye Webster, 4:00 PM, Blue Stage
Since we previewed Faye Webster’s Noonchorus livestream in October, she’s released the long-awaited follow-up to Atlanta Millionaires Club, the cheekily titled I Know I’m Funny haha (Secretly Canadian). At that time, she had dropped “Better Distractions”, “In A Good Way”, and “Both All The Time”, and the rest of the album more than follows the promise of these three dreamy country, folk rock, and R&B-inspired tunes. Webster continues to be a master of tone and mood, lovelorn on “Sometimes”, sarcastic on the title track, and head-in-the-clouds on “A Dream with a Baseball Player”. All the while, she and her backing band provide stellar, languorous instrumentation, keys and slide guitar on the bossa nova “Kind Of”, her overdriven guitar sludge on “Cheers”, cinematic strings on the melancholic “A Stranger”, stark acoustic guitar on heartbreaking closer “Half of Me”. And the ultimate irony of Webster’s whip-smart lyricism is that a line like, “And today I get upset over this song that I heard / And I guess was just upset because why didn't I think of it first,” is that I can guarantee a million songwriters feel the same way about her music, timely in context and timeless in sound and feeling.
Catch her at an aftershow on Saturday at Sleeping Village with Danger Incorporated.
Georgia Anne Muldrow, 5:15 PM, Blue Stage
The queen of beats takes the stage during the hottest part of the day, perfect for some sweaty dancing. VWETO III (FORESEEN + Epistrophik Peach Sound), the third album in Muldrow’s beats record series, was put together with “calls to action” in mind, each single leading up to the album’s release to be paired with crowdsourced submissions via Instagram from singers, visual artists, dancers, and turntablists. Moreover, many of the album’s tracks are inspired by very specific eras of Black music, from Boom Bap and G-funk to free jazz, and through it all, Muldrow provides a platform for musical education just as much as funky earworms.
Revisit our interview with Muldrow from earlier this year.
Angel Olsen, 7:25 PM, Red Stage
It’s been a busy past two years for Angel Olsen. She revealed Whole New Mess (Jagjaguwar) in August 2020, stripped down arrangements of many of the songs on 2019′s amazing All Mirrors. In May, she came out with a box set called Song of the Lark and Other Far Memories (Jagjaguwar), which contained both All Mirrors and Whole New Mess and a bonus LP of remixes, covers, alternate takes, and bonus tracks. She shortly and out of nowhere dropped a song of the year candidate in old school country rock high and lonesome Sharon Van Etten duet “Like I Used To”. And just last month, she released Aisles, an 80′s covers EP out on her Jagjaguwar imprint somethingscosmic. She turns Laura Branigan’s disco jam “Gloria” and Men Without Hats’ “Safety Dance” into woozy, echoing, slowed-down beds of synth haze and echoing drum machine. On Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark’s “If You Leave”, her voice occupies different registers between the soft high notes of the bridge and autotuned solemnity of the chorus. Sure, other covers are more recognizable in their tempo and arrangement, like Billy Idol’s Rebel Yell ballad “Eyes Without a Face” and Alphaville’s “Forever Young”, but Aisles is exemplary of Olsen’s ability to not just reinvent herself but classics.
At Pitchfork, I’d bet on a set heavy on All Mirrors and Whole New Mess, but as with the unexpectedness of Aisles, you never know!
St. Vincent, 8:30 PM, Green Stage
Annie Clark again consciously shifts personas and eras with her new St. Vincent album Daddy’s Home (Loma Vista), inspired by 70′s funk rock and guitar-driven psychedelia. While much of the album’s rollout centered around its backstory--Clark’s father’s time in prison for white collar crimes--the album is a thoughtful treatise on honesty and identity, the first St. Vincent album to really stare Clark’s life in the face. 
Many of its songs saw their live debut during a Moment House stream, which we previewed last month.
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The Weather Station; Photo by Jeff Bierk
SUNDAY
Tomberlin, 1:00 PM, Green Stage
While the LA-via-Louisville singer-songwriter hasn’t yet offered a proper follow-up LP to her 2018 debut At Weddings, she did last year release an EP called Projections (Saddle Creek), which expands upon At Weddings’ shadowy palate. Songs like “Hours” and “Wasted” are comparatively clattering and up-tempo. Yet, all four of the original tracks are increasingly self-reflexive, Tomberlin exploring and redefining herself on her terms, whether singing about love or queerness, all while maintaining her sense of humor. (“When you go you take the sun and all my flowers die / So I wait by the window and write some shit / And hope that you'll reply,” she shrugs over acoustic strums and wincing electric guitars.) The album ends with a stark grey cover of Casiotone for the Painfully Alone’s “Natural Light”; Tomberlin finds a kindred spirit in the maudlin musings of Owen Ashworth.
Get there early on Sunday to hear select tracks from At Weddings and Projections but also likely some new songs.
oso oso, 2:45 PM, Blue Stage
Basking in the Glow (Triple Crown), the third album from Long Beach singer-songwriter Jade Lilitri as Oso Oso, was one of our favorite records of 2019, and we’d relish the opportunity to see them performed to a crowd in the sun. Expect to hear lots of it; hopefully we’re treated to new oso oso material some time soon.
Catch them at an aftershow on Saturday at Subterranean with fellow Pitchfork performer Dogleg and Retirement Party.
The Weather Station, 4:00 PM, Blue Stage
The Toronto band led by singer-songwriter Tamara Lindeman released one of the best albums of the year back in February with Ignorance (Fat Possum), songs inspired by climate change-addled anxiety. While the record is filled with affecting, reflective lines about loss and trying to find happiness in the face of dread, in a live setting, I imagine the instrumentation will be a highlight, from the fluttering tension of “Robber” to the glistening disco of “Parking Lot”.
Revisit our preview of their Pitchfork Instagram performance from earlier this year. Catch them at an aftershow on Friday at Schubas with Ulna.
Danny Brown, 6:15 PM, Green Stage
The Detroit rapper’s last full-length record was the Q-Tip executive produced uknowhatimsayin¿ (Warp), though he’s popped up a few times since then, on remixes, a Brockhampton album, and TV62, a Bruiser Brigade Records compilation from earlier this year. (He’s also claimed in Twitch streams that his new album Quaranta is almost done.) His sets--especially Pitchfork sets--are always high-energy, as he’s got so many classic albums and tracks under his belt at this point, so expect to hear a mix of those.
Erykah Badu, 8:30 PM, Green Stage
What more can I say? This is the headliner Pitchfork has been trying to get for years, responsible for some of the greatest neo soul albums of all time. There’s not much else to say about Erykah Badu other than she’s the number one must-see at the festival.
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taexual · 5 years ago
Text
HOLIC - 50 | jb x reader
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pairing: Im Jaebum x Reader
genre: enemies to lovers au | roommate au
warnings: fluff
words: 3.1k
disclaimer: i do not own the gif, please let me know if it belongs to you, so i can give proper credit
the final chapter is up, let’s get it!
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To say that it was raining cats and dogs would have been akin to saying nothing at all because the precipitation that night resembled a whole downpour of whales much more accurately. You have, of course, experienced rain before and you never really appreciated it much, but as you exited the car outside of the building, you welcomed every drop with a smile on your face. It seemed as though there used to be so many things in life that you’d hated, but tonight, as you texted Jaebum, announcing your arrival at the party, each of those silent moments of hatred seemed to lose all meaning.
The waiter took your coat after you entered the empty loft that you and Jackson had picked out for tonight’s event. Giving him a grateful nod and brushing the wet hair away from your face, you grabbed a glass of champagne by the door and headed for the party. With each step that you took inside of the packed venue – full of people, waiting to hear and to congratulate Jaebum on his debut EP – you watched the white walls of the building come alive with the pictures you’ve taken of Jaebum in Jackson’s studio that very first time you were there.
You wanted to take partial credit for the planning of this event, but really, it had been Jackson’s idea. As soon as you and him started to work together, he didn’t see a point to host your exhibition on a separate night from Jaebum’s release party because the two instances were connected so closely to one another. Jaebum had used you for inspiration when he worked on the songs he’ll be putting out for the world to hear and, similarly, the only pictures you wanted to exhibit for all to see were the ones that featured Jaebum.
Now, smiling as your eyes searched for the live-version of the man in the pictures on the walls, you welcomed the warm memories of all the days leading up to this moment. All the fights and the make-ups. All the kisses and inside jokes. All your shared friends – who were all here, eager to congratulate you and Jaebum both – and all of your shared nights.
The title piece for both, your exhibition and Jaebum’s EP, greeted you in the center of the room, reading in bold letters, “HOLIC. indicating a person’s abnormal desire for something.” Another memory sparked in your mind – you’ve only settled on the title a few nights ago, lying awake next to Jaebum who was tracing symbols on the sensitive skin of your neck—symbols, that were only visible to him—with the tip of his finger.
“I’ve never needed anyone this much before,” he had whispered to you then, “so much that it feels like an illness without a cure.”
You had responded to him with endless confessions of love, lasting all throughout the night and well into the morning, and all was decided.
Admittedly, out of all the memories that the pictures on the walls brought back, the memories of the last few nights before this party were your most favorite ones. Even if thinking about them made you much dizzier – and hotter – than the champagne that was being served here.
“Hey!” Jackson’s shrill voice distracted you and you turned your head to see him and a group of executives you thought you’ve seen around his studio a few times before. “Where’s the boyfriend? We should get some pictures taken of you two together.”
“Oh,” you looked around again. “I thought you were with him. Isn’t he in the back?”
“I don’t know,” Jackson glanced towards the hallway at the end of the room – it lead to a storage room that Jaebum had planned to use to rehearse, “he was waiting for you to arrive.”
“I’ll go find him,” you said and, with a quick nod at the people in Jackson’s entourage, excused yourself.
You didn’t even reach the hallway before you saw the door open at the far end as Jaebum stepped out of the storage room, his shoulders hunched and chest heavy with anxiety. He closed the door, stopping short as soon as he saw you.
“You’re here,” he said and, even though it was too dark to see him, you could hear the smile in his voice. “You look beautiful. Maybe you shouldn’t come closer or else we might miss the entire event.”
You laughed, crossing the hallway anyway, because you haven’t seen him today yet – he’d left early for a soundcheck and refused to bring you along with him, not wanting you to hear his songs early – and that was too long of a time. Jaebum, feeling exactly the same way, had his arms wrapped around you as soon as you stopped close enough for him to reach.
Every kiss you’ve shared since reuniting that night in the lounge room felt so important and special that you both refused to pull away first as if this was the last kiss you’d ever share and neither of you wanted to be responsible for its ending. You didn’t mind losing yourself in him completely whenever your lips touched but, this time, you two were about to start the biggest night of your lives to date and, despite everything, you had to pull away.
“Jackson is looking for us,” you said, reluctantly breaking the kiss—and then regretting it right away because of how alluring he looked from up close. “He said something about getting our picture taken.”
“Ah, that’s right,” Jaebum groaned. He’d already talked about how little wish he had to participate in the promotional aspect of making music – he just wanted to create and to sing – but he knew he wouldn’t get out of it. “Let’s go.”
“Don’t look so sad,” you said, taking his hand into yours as the two of you headed towards the party. “It’s your big night.”
“It’s our big night,” he corrected, pressing a quick, chaste kiss to your cheek just as the two of you emerged from the hallway. The few photographers Jackson had hired for tonight immediately found the two of you, their flashes going off so suddenly and with such vehemence that nearly everyone at the party turned to look. “God, I feel awkward.”
Smiling, you turned to look at him and – not daring to kiss him now that there were cameras on you – chose to fix his tie for him instead. “Don’t. You look great.”
Jaebum watched you as you tightened his tie, his eyes providing the much-needed warmth on this rainy day – the photographers were having a field day and they didn’t even have to try – and then leaned in to whisper into your ear, “I’m so grateful to have you next to me tonight.”
“I love you,” you replied, his hand clutching yours tighter. “I never thought we’d make it this far.”
“I love you,” he echoed, “I never had doubts about this.”
Thankfully, Jackson proved to be not just a great friend and a talented artist – or perhaps a producer? A photographer? A model? The man clearly hated labels – but also a fantastic party host. Another few moments later, when you and Jaebum were already risking permanent eye damage from the camera flashes, Jackson shuffled closer to you, waving his hand around in a manner so authoritative, the photographers ceased their rapid flash fire immediately.
“Let’s get started, yeah?” Jackson asked and, after getting affirmative nods from both of you, he proceeded to walk Jaebum to the platform in the far corner of the room.
A microphone and a stool was already prepared for Jaebum on the platform, the audio engineers giving him a thumbs-up from across the room. Slowly, the background music that had played through the speakers since the party started faded out, and the room prepared to finally hear what they’d come here to hear.
“Thank you for coming,” Jaebum said into the microphone as soon as he climbed on the platform. His voice sounded so sheepish, you could tell that the few elderly ladies behind you had started to giggle because they were falling in love with him, too. “It’s a very special night tonight and I’m happy to get to share it with all of you.”
You wished for nothing more than to stand silently in the opposite corner of the room where you could hear Jaebum’s clear voice but, as soon as he finished his thank-you speech and introduced the first song, you learned that that was absolutely not going to happen.
Your friends were the first ones who approached you, trying to keep their excitement to a minimum but still distracting you from Jaebum’s music. You didn’t mind – it felt so touching to hear their words of support – and you didn’t really mind the people from Jaebum’s agency who approached you next, either, because, for one, you felt like you had to leave a good impression on them, but also, they were unexpectedly supportive as well. Apparently, this was the first acoustic-showcase-turned-photography-exhibition for any artist signed with their label and that was, according to them, a great start for any career.
You got to hear Jaebum finish the first song – and saw how lost in the music he seemed to be on that platform; he looked like he was exploring a different world, far away from the party and the people here – and applauded as loud as every other person in the room before, just as he started to introduce the next song, you were forced to return to the position of co-host and carry on with your own performance.
Apparently, the people who had come tonight weren’t just friends and acquaintances, but complete strangers as well. They had simply gotten curious about an event in their neighborhood and decided to show up. You learned of this when Jaebum’s second song of the night unleashed a chain of people you’ve never met – all of them were curious about purchasing the artwork. Your artwork.
Truthfully, you hadn’t even planned on selling any of your pictures, so, flushed and disheveled, you left them waiting while you scanned the party for Jackson.
“I got this,” he reassured you as soon as you found him – he was chatting up the three elderly ladies from before – and explained the situation. “You go to the front, yeah? He needs to see you.”
“Y-yeah,” you nodded, overwhelmed by so many things happening at the same time. “Thank you!”
Jackson nodded and headed in the direction you had pointed in, while you made your way closer to Jaebum’s platform. For the first few moments, you couldn’t concentrate on the sound of his voice for too long. You kept turning around to check on Jackson who was showing your pictures and bargaining with anyone who was interested. But, before long, Jaebum’s songs ended up captivating you after all. It was simply impossible not to feel yourself wander into the realms he’d created with his soulful music.
Watching him was an all-consuming experience. Jaebum kept his eyes closed for most of the songs but whenever he did allow himself to look at the audience, his eyes always found you by default. That alone was enough to make your heart race but every time he smiled when he looked at you – as if he wasn’t expecting to see you standing at the front, completely transfixed by him – sent you right into a dizzy spell and you were worried you’d conclude this night by passing out before hearing his entire set.
“The last song,” Jaebum announced right when your cheeks were starting to hurt from smiling so much, “is easily the most meaningful one in the EP. It’s about someone who’s really important to me. The most important, actually. Uh, we met under unusual circumstances, to be honest. I caused a lot of damage in this person’s life – I broke furniture, even,” he had to pause until the audience stopped laughing, “I was generally a very big asshole. But this person and I went through a lot a-and I hope we go through a lot more together.”
When Jaebum looked at you before the first chords started to play, you were afraid you looked like a deer caught in the headlights. Your heart was struggling to keep beating as the time around you seemed to come to a stop.
“You and I, who met by accident,” he started the song, the richness of his voice so much more prominent when he was singing live than it was on the record, “you never even thought about us, but my head is completely filled with thoughts of you. I think about you every moment of the day.”
You tried to focus on your breathing because focusing on the words he was singing – the words he might have written about you – was making your hands shake and your eyes water. This could have been the very song Jackson had mentioned when he confronted you at the exhibition you’d attended with Jiho.
“Without missing a single day, no matter where I am, I want to be with you,” he sang and you perked up, recognizing the last line. This was the same song—the same melody, the similar lyrics!—that you’d overheard Jaebum sing to himself in the shower at the motel all of those weeks ago. “I don’t want to be apart, not for one moment. Let’s make a promise, the two of us.”
You’d have promised him anything in that moment—and any moment that followed—as you listened to him sing, your entire body coming alive with each chord. You could feel your pulse throb in your veins, your temples, and your throat all at the same time.
“Each gesture of yours is picturesque. Even when you wake up in the morning, you sparkle,” Jaebum’s voice continued, his eyes catching yours in a loving—and absolutely unyielding—gaze. “It wouldn’t matter if you were shabby, you’re already inside of my heart. Even if someone else comes along, no one compares to you.”
Your throat was dry but your eyes were the complete opposite. You felt the first tears slip out of your control and slide down your cheeks -- just like the raindrops had, outside of the loft -- as soon as Jaebum gripped the mic stand tighter, starting the chorus of the song.
“I can’t stop thinking ‘bout you,” he harmonised, his eyes closing but his heart remaining open as words spilled out from the deepest cavities of his chest, “I am spiraling out of control. All I wanna do is love you, the spot next to me naturally belongs to you.”
You flinched, startled by an unexpected hand that had landed on your shoulder just as the chorus drew to a close. Tearing your eyes away from Jaebum, you saw Jackson next to you – a proud, almost fatherly, smile on his face. He didn’t say anything but the nod of his head confirmed what little doubts you may have had left – this was the song for you. The song about you.
“When I think about it now, it still makes no sense,” Jaebum continued, the feeling of you finally hearing these words so relieving, he couldn’t help the small smile that had crept up to his lips as he asked, “how did I fall for you in such a short time? Even when I close my eyes, I’m thinking about you. I can’t fall asleep, what’s the matter?”
You knew you were going through the most powerful whirlpool of emotions of your life as you felt the tears on your cheeks but couldn’t resist mirroring Jaebum’s smile.
“I don’t know if I’m me, sometimes I get surprised. My image, even if it’s the same, is a little awkward,” he sang, each and every word full of the feelings he’d grasped and pulled out of his heart to put them into the song. “But I think it’s okay – this isn’t so bad, either. As long as I’m next to you, whoever I am, it’s all good.”
You felt so much love for him, you thought you were going to explode. And, in spite of finding the song simply mesmerizing and utterly unforgettable, you suddenly couldn’t wait for it to end because even though he was singing it on a platform a mere few feet away from you, he still felt too far.
“I can’t stop thinking ‘bout you,” he admitted again in the second chorus. When asked later, you’d never be able to tell if he was singing this song at his release party in front of dozens of people, or if he had pulled you away from the crowd to sing to you about all the things he’d insisted he was so bad at saying out loud.
Bowing to deafening applause when the song ended, Jaebum thanked everyone once again, his speech directed at those who came and those who didn’t. He thanked his friends individually. He thanked his label and everyone involved in the creation process. He thanked his family. And he thanked you – but you were already crying too much to make sense of anything he was saying.
As soon as he was finished, he wasted no time before climbing off the platform and, with a smile brighter than the brightest star in the night sky, he made his way towards you. The people were still applauding him when he reached you but he was now focused on something else entirely.
“You didn’t like the song?” he asked with a smile as his hands carefully wiped the tears away from your face.
You laughed at the absurd question, wrapping your arms around him and leaning your head against his shoulder as you whispered, “I loved it. I love you.”
“I love you, too,” he said and the room erupted into a yet another round of applause as he hugged you back, laughing in the same ethereal way that made your heart dance and the rain outside stop, so the whole world could listen.
With the people around you still on a high brought on by Jaebum’s music and with the applause still ringing in your ears, Jaebum took you back into the world he’d created for you and him only -- a world that seemed to be miles away from anyone else and lightyears away from real life. No one wanted to approach you and interrupt. No one dared.
Kissing your temple, Jaebum pulled away slightly to push a stray strand of your hair away from your face and ask, “do you still have doubts if we’ll make it?”
“No,” you answered, your eyes glittering with life and with love. “I think we’ve already made it.”
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mybiasisexo · 4 years ago
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Bet
Genre: angst | roommate!au | exlovers!au
Pairing: Lay x You
Length: 6.9k
Warning: Unfinished | Language | Adult Themes
Summary: Having a roommate isn’t a strange concept, but when that roommate is your ex? Things can get a bit complicated, especially if said roommate isn’t completely over you....
Author’s Note: For some reason, Yixing brings out the angst in me? I feel everything I ever try to write for him it’s highkey angsty like Jesus!! But this one ended fluffy. I just felt like, idk, it got boring? It got to cliche? I just didn’t like the way it was turning out and instead of trying to change the ending, I just scrapped the whole thing lmao. Really like the first half though, like I really did something there, huh? haha
MASTERLIST
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It was late evening and you were spending the time unwinding from a long day at work. A glass of wine at your side, you sat comfortably on the couch reading peacefully to yourself.
That was until the sound of a key unlocking the front door shattered the calm atmosphere.
Peeking over the rim of your gold reading glasses, you take in the intruder’s form. After stepping out of his shoes, his head swiveled around to meet your gaze, probably from sensing your stare. He nodded in greeting before dashing down the hall towards his bedroom, his door closing with a soft click.
It wasn’t always his room.
The mood you were in before he got there was now tarnished, as if you’d lost your appetite. With a sigh, you gently shut your book before leaning over to snatch ahold of the fragile neck of the glass holding the wine you had been sipping on. You downed every last drop of the blood red liquid, grimacing as it uncomfortably sat in your belly. Once that task was done, you leave to your bedroom—a room you once shared with the man currently inhabiting the one across the hall.
It’s safe to say that your life had gotten rather challenging lately. 
After another particularly draining day at work, you dragged one of your fellow coworkers, Kim Jongin, back to your condo for dinner. It wasn’t anything romantic. The two of you formed an instant bond after realizing you were the youngest people at the office you worked, thus leading to you getting closer, especially as of late. You usually would have dinner out or at his place, but made the impromptu decision to hold it at yours since he was whining the whole day about never being invited.
As you both crossed the threshold, his eyes widened in awe. “And I thought the outside was nice. I knew you were rich.”
Rolling your eyes, you led him deeper into the building. “My roommate makes a lot more money than I do, but we manage to live comfortably.”
“’Comfortably’.” Jongin scoffed, still taking in your home with a dazed expression.
After giving him a tour, you both settled on the couch in your living room, ordering takeout from three different places and putting a movie on. Once the food arrived, the two of you chatted and ate until you felt like puking and hung out like regular friends did.
About a couple hours in, you heard that dreaded sound of a key opening your front door. You stiffened anxiously, but Jongin didn’t sense your drastic change of mood, as he was too busy laughing violently—there really is no other way to describe the way he laughs—at the scene unfolding on the television screen. He did the whole bit: stomped his feet, slapped the pillow in his lap, and tumbled onto your own.
That was the position you were found in.
The clearing of a throat jolted Jongin upright. It was silent as he caught his bearings, wiping the tears that had fell down his cheeks as he regained his breath. Once he was composed, he blinked up at whoever made the sound.
Zhang Yixing stood beside the couch; scrutinizing your visitor who had sobered up completely with the dark look aimed his way.
“Um….” You scratched the back of your head awkwardly, not knowing where to start and hyper aware of the fact you were sat between both men.
“I see you have a guest,” Yixing finally spoke lowly. He pulled his gaze away from Jongin long enough to pin them on you. You gulped. His eyebrow lifted accusingly and, for some reason, shame overwhelmed you, as if you got caught in the act of something sinful. It caused you to slump into the couch and stare at your hands that were resting on your thighs. “Well, don’t let me intrude. Continue on.”
His words were friendly enough, but the tone revealed otherwise. He bid you both a farewell before taking off into his side of the flat.
Awkwardness flooded the area like a bad smell as Jongin and you shared a glance.
“Your roommate, I take it,” he said, throwing you a knowing look that didn’t go unnoticed.
You confirmed his statement with a simple nod.
“He seemed…like more than a roommate?”
You winced at his assessment, turning the other way in an attempt to hide your reaction. He sensed your reluctance to reveal anything and called your name, beckoning you to spill your secrets. With a groan, you gave in and spun around to face him.
“Fine! He just so happens to be my ex-boyfriend! Happy now?” You snapped. You had been hoping to avoid this conversation, aware of how bizarre your current living situation was. Not wanting to explain yourself was the main reason you hadn’t brought Jongin over in the first place.
The gears in his head started turning and you watched him process the information. With an almost audible click, he gasped dramatically as the truth dawned on him. Going as far as dropping his jaw and covering his mouth with his hand in shock. He pointed a shaky finger at you accusingly. “He…. You’re roommates with your ex-boyfriend?”
You brought your knees up to your chin, wrapping your arms around your legs, letting out a breathy, “yeah.”
“How, if I may ask, did that happen?” Now that he was aware of what was going on, he seemed more apathetic towards you.
“Oh boy.” You leaned your head against the back of the couch, staring up at your ceiling as if it held all the answers to life’s problems. “Yixing and I had been together for four years. Funny enough, we met the day of our college graduation. Went to the same college and didn’t even know until it was over. Anyways, as we grew closer and started our lives together, we, as most adults do, got super busy with our jobs. He’s really passionate about producing. He makes beats and instrumentals and sends them to huge entertainment companies. It wasn’t until he decided to send his lyrics in as well that he started getting picked up. In the past year, he’s kind of become a huge deal. He writes and composes songs for all kinds of major artists on this side of the world. You might’ve heard of him, his artist name is Lay.”
It took another moment, but then Jongin’s face fell into another one of shock. “I thought he looked familiar!”
“Yeah, he hangs out with all the famous people and has actually been preparing to debut as an artist himself.”
“So, is that why you broke up?”
You shrugged. “In a way. I got this new editing job and am starting to make connections myself. We both had been so busy trying to build our careers; we rarely had time to build on our relationship. One day he came home and I told him I wanted to break up. It’s not that I didn’t love him anymore; it was more like I loved him enough to realize I was hindering him, holding him back from becoming something great. Music is his main priority, the one thing he loves more than anything, loving me took some of that away.”
Jongin said your name softly, caressing your shoulder comfortingly.
“It’s fine,” you assured before continuing. “He took it very well. Almost too well. It stung a bit, I mean, he agreed almost faster than I could get it out! But it happened and the real issue arose: who kept the condo? Neither of us wanted to move. This place was our home, our sanctuary. The first real adult purchase we made together and it was filled with precious memories I didn’t want to move on from just yet. We argued over it for two days, until finally deciding it would probably just be easier for us to both stay. I mean, both our names are on the lease; it’s too expensive to live in alone and forget trying to find another roommate! This house is as much his as mine, so he just simply moved down the hall, into the old guest room he was using as a studio anyways, so it wasn’t like it was a drastic change for him. It’s been around ten months now and we’re amicable. I mean, the only thing we share is this living room and the kitchen and we rarely run into each other. It’s nice, I guess, all things considered….”
The past ten months replayed in your mind. The first two months were uncomfortable, to say the least. The shift from being lovers to simply roommates wasn’t as easy a transition than you led Jongin to believe. Seeing your ex-boyfriend everyday while cradling a wounded heart was beyond difficult, but you somehow managed. Threw yourself deeper into your work, hung out with both old and new friends, and joined a yoga class to keep yourself preoccupied. Before you knew it, the harsh sting of loss faded into a healing bruise that only hurt once pressure was applied. Seeing Yixing, as little as you did, wasn’t as bad anymore.
“Are you sure he doesn’t have any more feelings for you?” Jongin questioned hesitantly. “He didn’t seem too happy to see me here.”
Yixing’s deadly glare from earlier swam back to the forefront of your mind and you wondered briefly if he did still love you, but you immediately shook the thought away with a laugh.
“No. I highly doubt it. We’ve both had time to move on.”
“You sure?” Jongin asked again.
You nodded confidently. “Oh yeah. We’re just roommates.”
Jongin left soon after that conversation, not completely sold on Yixing not having feelings for you. Once he left, you got ready for bed. Yixing found you in the kitchen a little later, pouring a glass of water for your bedside table. You didn’t see or hear him enter, he’s always been a silent mover, constantly startling you with his sudden appearances.
Once you turned and saw him a mere breath away you flinched with a yelp.
“Yixing!” You scolded, clutching your chest to quiet down your speeding heart.
“Ah, sorry,” he said, scratching his head. He was also cladded in his pajamas like he would be retiring to bed soon.
You reassured him it was okay before digging in the freezer for some chocolate—a late night snack. He was still hovering around the counter, not attempting to get anything and it confused you. When you glanced at him, he was staring at you intently.
“Do you…need something?” You asked.
“Yeah,” he began with a start. “I was just curious to know, well, since when did you start bringing other men into our home?”
The question left you flabbergasted. He said it casually, but you could see the restraint in his neck. He was holding in his anger.
You narrowed your eyes at him. “It’s really none of your business, being you and I aren’t together anymore.”
“We may not be in a relationship, but this is my house just as much yours and I would like to know who is in it—especially when I’m not here.”
“It that the problem?” You questioned, remembering Jongin’s questions from earlier. “Would I still be interrogated like this if I had brought a girl over instead?”
“I—It—” He stumbled over his words and you rolled your eyes. That seemed to set him off. “We were together for four years! Yet it only took you a few months to move on to somebody else? Right in front of me?”
His words were biting, and had the same effect on you that yours had on him. “I’m not! As I said before, it really is none of your business, but if you must know, Jongin is just a coworker and he has a girlfriend! I didn’t know I wasn’t allowed to have male friends, especially since you didn’t have a problem with it when we were together.”
“Of course I’d have a problem with it now,” he snarled like it was an obvious fact. When Yixing was angry, he didn’t get loud, he got quiet, and it was terrifying. “And if you can’t understand the reasoning, you’re blinder than I thought.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” You asked.
“You know what? It’s nothing. Forget I said anything.” He started backing up until he had exited the kitchen. He stormed back to the confines of his room, hollering as he went, “invite whoever you want! Have an orgy for all I care! It doesn’t matter how I feel about it. It never does!”
His door slammed shut behind him, causing you to jump again.
What the hell was his problem?
~*~
The following week was filled with stiffness. You hadn’t thought much about the conversation had with Yixing until you woke up the next day restless and unsettled. You couldn’t even bare to look at the man you lived with.
It had been the first time you both had a real conversation since the break up and it was riddled with things left unsaid. What had Yixing meant when he said you were blind? Why was he so angry at the thought of you bringing home another man? You understood if he felt uncomfortable having strangers in his house without his approval, but it didn’t seem like a good enough reason to garner such a reaction. Would it? It appeared deeper than that—his hurt. Yet, as much as you racked your brain, you couldn’t figure out why.
Deep down you knew, but were too petrified at the implications to humor it.
Instead you did what you do best and ignored the whole situation. You also ignored the strange empty feeling in your chest every time you thought of Yixing.
Saturday came and as soon as the elevator opened to your floor, you felt the bass of music vibrating throughout the hall. Your neighbor must be throwing a party. Great! Just what you needed after a long day of work.
As you got closer, you realized the music was not coming from next door, but in fact, your place.
Your mind goes into overdrive as your steps slow. Yixing hadn’t mentioned anything about a party. Sure, you weren’t exactly on speaking terms at the moment, but you had a right to know if he was going to be doing something like this.
The need to get answers spurred you into action, ripping the door open in record time. The cacophony of party noises nearly blew you back. Every surface was covered in drinks and food and you had never seen so many bodies in your home. After the shock wore off, you pressed on, diving head first into the sea of people.
As you searched for that one familiar face, you were stricken by how many other faces you recognized. Was that Dean in your house? You paused to get a closer look before recalling your mission. Determination overtook you and with a new sense of purpose, you continued squeezing through the crowd.
Yixing was nowhere to be found.
After checking the most congested areas twice, fear started blooming within your gut. Did he leave? Was this party done without either one of your knowledge? Before panic could properly set in, you saw someone who could probably help you out.
“Byun Baekhyun!” You roared over the music, causing the smaller man to visibly shake. He took you in with wide eyes before stuttering your name nervously.
Oh, he was in trouble.
“Would you mind telling me what the fuck is going on?” You said, closing in on him. He had been leaning against a kitchen counter, red cup in hand.
“I…. Yixing didn’t tell you?”
“Does it look like he did?” You asked, fuming.
“It’s a team party.” He didn’t waste anymore time stalling. He also wasn’t slurring his words and his face wasn’t as red as the cup in his hand, both tell tale signs of his intoxication, meaning he was sober. “Since Yixing is the founder of Zhang Studios, he took it upon himself to hold the event at his place. I’m surprised he didn’t tell you, it had been planned months ago….”
“Speaking of Yixing, where is he?” You continued interrogating the poor man.
Baekhyun did a weak scan of the area before shrugging. “Room maybe?”
Letting out an annoyed groan, you left Baekhyun and decided to give up for now. This time, when you saw Dean again you caught his eye and nodded in greeting, silently fangirling when he smiled and bowed slightly in return. Wow, he was beautiful. Relief flooded you upon realizing your room hadn’t been touched. You took a brisk shower to wash away the day and then made yourself as comfortable in your bed as you could. There was no way sleep was going to come, not with the way the walls were reverberating from the bass intermingling with the sounds of drunk people outside your room. That wouldn’t stop you from at least trying. As you lay there, you imagined all the pieces of your mind you were going to give Yixing once you finally saw him.
Somehow, between all the scenarios playing in your mind, you dozed off, only made aware of the fact when you were jerked awake by the door colliding into your wall, the chaos from outside pouring in. You sprang upright, catching the man of the hour stumbling in. He caught the door and slammed it shut, leaning against it tiredly.
You cursed yourself for forgetting to lock the door. 
Yixing soon noticed you on the bed, straightening up at the sight of you.
“What are you doing here?” You asked, voice croaking from lack of use.
“I…it was too loud out there and my room is currently occupied.” The way he said that had you guessing whoever was in there was making good use of his mattress.
“So my room was the best choice, Lay?” You questioned, growing irritated the longer you looked at him. “It’s your party, just tell everyone to leave.”
“Oh, so I’m Lay now?” He questioned, ignoring the second part of your statement. He shook his head before making his way over to the foot of your mattress, gingerly sitting on the end with his back facing you.
This was the closest you had been to him in months.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were throwing a party?” You asked.
“The same reason you didn’t tell me you were inviting men into our home,” he shot back instantly. 
You scoffed. “You’re really still hung up on that? I already told you it’s not like that between Jongin and me.”
“Of course I’m still ‘hung up’ on that.” He sounded tired, as if he were exhausted with having to explain himself. He took a deep breath before suddenly turning around so that he was facing you. “I…I miss you.”
Your eyebrows shot up to your hairline before you laughed dismissively. “You must be drunk.”
“No, I’m not. I’m being serious. I miss you.”
It was your turn to shake your head. “You see me pretty much every day.”
“That’s not what I mean.” He licked his lips before crawling closer until he was directly in front of you, knees pressing against yours through the comforter. “I miss your laugh and your lame jokes. I miss your cooking and the way you always hum when you’re really focused or nervous. I miss your friendship and your warmth. I miss you.”
“Yixing….” His confession was overwhelming and that odd sense of emptiness you had been feeling all week in the pit of your stomach was back in full force.
He closed his eyes and hummed appreciatively. “I miss the way you say my name also.”
When they reopened, they were alight, practically glowing in the darkness of your room.
“I---this…. Where is this coming from?” You questioned, nearly speechless from his words.
His features softened as he stared at you as if you held his world. It was a look you hadn’t received in months—if not over a year. Your throat tightened as he lifted a hand to rest his fingertips against your cheek, his thumb rubbing the soft flesh gently. He grinned and your heart stuttered.
“I’ve been holding back for a while because I didn’t want to make things weird, but I don’t know how much longer I can refrain myself.”
“Yixing, you’re drunk,” you repeated. “You’re not in your right state of mind. You can’t possibly mean any of this.”
“Do I look drunk?” He asked. The only thing he looked was offended. “Do I sound drunk? You know how I get when I’m intoxicated, I would have been sleeping in a corner somewhere hours ago if I were.”
“How can I possibly believe any of this when you agreed to break up?”
“I did it because I thought that’s what you wanted,” he informed. “I always put you first. If you were unhappy in this relationship, I wasn’t going to hold you back, no matter how I felt.”
“So, you didn’t want to break up?” You asked, tears starting to blur your vision.
“Of course not,” he whispered brokenly. “You have always been the most important thing in my life. You still are.”
“I just don’t know.”
He moved even closer, his nose barely brushing yours as he slightly tightened his grip on your face. “Let me prove it.”
And with that, he kissed you.
The first contact of your lips was just a whisper, him testing the waters. When you didn’t protest, he went in again, latching onto your upper lip with added force. His scent of pine and sweat and something that was solely him traveled up your nostrils, bringing you back to simpler times. His presence comforted you, allowing you to fall into his embrace. Your hands went up to cup his face and return the kiss with more fervor, prompting him to deepen the kiss. God, you missed him too, more than you would ever allow yourself to believe. He was everything you ever wanted, everything you ever needed, and right now proved that. His hands wandered up and down your sides and you shivered at his touch, starved from it for too long.
He pulled you mouth open with his, moaning slightly as he nudged your tongue with his own and the action seemed to break the spell you had been under.
You yanked his head back and your lips made an audible pop as they separated. It took him a second to grasp what happened and then he was gazing down at you with a hot yet dazed expression that made you want to kiss him again, but you held on. His dark hair was sticking up at all angles from the force of your ravaging fingers and his lips were starting to swell slightly. He looked a mess.
He looked delicious.
“Get out,” you murmured, glaring at your legs.
“What?” Shock was evident in his voice.
“I said ‘get out’!” You yelled, angry with yourself as tears formed in your eyes.
“But I thought—”
“Well, you thought wrong. Please,” you begged. It was silent for a long moment, but then he was moving. He quietly shuffled off your bed and walked to the door, hesitating for a second to peek at you before leaving with a heavy sigh, the door clicking lightly behind him.
With his presence gone, you were able to move, diving into your covers and burying your head into your pillows to muffle the screams before trying to calm down.
The music from outside died abruptly, the silence helping you swiftly fall asleep.
~*~
You wake up before your alarm the next day and head to work hours before your shift actually began. The last thing you wanted to do so early in the morning was be caught in the same area as him.
Jongin was pleased to know his suspicions were correct when it came to Yixing and tried to talk you into just going for it when it was obvious you still felt something for the man, but you declined.
Yixing was in the past.
It was for the best—your separation. At least, that’s what you had been telling yourself.
When you got home, you were met with a spotless place. All evidence of the party was gone, leaving you wondering if you had dreamt the whole thing. Making your way further into the house, you run upon Yixing with a Swiffer in his hands, mopping the dining room floor. He straightened up with a sigh, stilling at the sight of you.
You bounced on the balls of your feet, a nervous habit, under his scrutiny. His expression was unreadable, but that was as much an answer as any.
“Hey,” you let out in a breath after the silence had drawn on for too long.
“Hey,” he replied, voice reserved.
“You cleaned—”
“Look, I’m—”
You both stopped abruptly as you spoke over each other, another silence filled the air as you hesitated.
“You go first.” He finally urged gently.
“You, uh, you cleaned up.” You pointed out the obvious, gesturing around you to the shimmering house.
“Yeah, I—I wanted to apologize for last night,” he revealed, running a hand through his hair. “It was wrong of me to throw a party without talking to you first. Not to mention, what happened after….”
You cleared your throat awkwardly at the fresh memory.
“It wasn’t my intention to hurt or make you uncomfortable. I’m sorry for that. I was out of line and I really don’t have an excuse….”
His eyebrows furrowed as he continued rambling nervously. He appeared worried at first; leading you to believe maybe he was scared at the thought you were planning on kicking him out.
His sentence faltered, but you knew he wasn’t finished, so you didn’t say anything. The fear that once coated his voice was nowhere to be found when he opened his mouth again. 
“That being said,” he began. His tone was lower and his eyes were a few shades darker than before as he examined you with a steady gaze. The whole shift of his demeanor sent chills down your spine. “I had a lot of time to think and I’ve come to this conclusion.”
He set the mop aside and approached you until he was an arm’s length away. “I want you back.”
You eyes widened in shock, though in the back of your mind you should have known this was coming. 
“Being with you last night,” he continued. “I meant what I said about missing you. We work better together and I can’t believe I’ve allowed this to go on for so long.” 
“Yixing, what are you going on about?”
“I want to be with you again! This ‘arrangement’ we have going on is pure torture! Having to see you everyday, but not being able to touch you. Hell, nowadays it’s like I’m not even allowed to look at you! I just… don’t know for how much longer I can do this.”
“We both decided it was for the best to be separated for the moment,” you said, taking a safe step back.
“Yeah, but the moment’s past. I can’t keep living like this. Being with you, but not with you! Especially in this place where we built a life together.”
“That’s too bad!” You said, voice rising slightly with irritation. “I don’t think I want to change what we are now!”
“I knew you’d say that,” he revealed. “So, I came up with a plan.”
You lifted an eyebrow quizzically.
He took a deep breath. “Tomorrow is the first. Give me one month to win you back and, if by the end you still honestly believe you don’t want to be with me anymore, I’ll leave.”
“Leave?” You asked, voice scratchy.
He nodded in confirmation. “Yeah. I’ll move out and you won’t ever have to see me again.”
“Why?” You felt like the room was spinning and the urge to sit was strong.
“I already told you,” he said gently. “I can’t live in this house with you just as a roommate. Not when I’m still in love with you.”
You opened your mouth to speak, but found no words would come out.
He smiled sadly before closing the space between you, leaning in to leave a lingering kiss on you forehead. You gasped at the gesture. He pulled away and leaned his forehead on the spot he just kissed. “One month. That’s all I’m asking. Just one.”
The way your heart pounded against your chest felt like a weakness and, if there was one thing you hated most, it was feeling weak.
“Fine.” You agreed, shoving him away so that you could actually breathe and focus properly. “One month. And if by the end your plan doesn’t work—which I’m sure it won’t—you’re out of here.”
He smiled, a wide joyous thing and pointed at you. “I’m going to win you back!”
“Whatever,” you mumbled, rubbing your temples as you retreated to your room.
~*~
Yixing wasted no time in his scheme of seduction.
The following morning, you were awoken by the beautiful sent of breakfast cooking. You stumbled out of bed; eyes still sealed shut from crust as you made your way to the kitchen only to be met with Yixing.
Shirtless.
If that wasn’t enough to wake you up, you didn’t know what was.
“Morning.” He grinned once he spotted you, taking the pan from the stove and shoveling eggs onto two stacked plates. “I made breakfast.”
“I see.” You slid onto a stool by the dining room bar as he stood across from you, setting a plate before you. It was loaded with the works and your stomach growled. You wasted no time stuffing your face, having to hide a moan of pleasure. You missed his cooking. “You haven’t cooked for me in a while.”
“I know. I thought now would be the perfect time to.”
You gathered what he was saying between the lines and chose to ignore it, just like you were ignoring the fact that he was still shirtless. He wandered about, taking a bite of food before cleaning the dishes and putting things away. When his attention was diverted, you peeked up at his lithe frame, taking in all the taunt muscle wrapped around his torso. It looked just as firm and strong as you remembered it and now your mouth was watering from something else besides the food. His six-pack was still visible despite him being in the middle of eating and how come his abs were directly in front of you?
He cleared his throat and you coughed, choking on your food a little. Once you sipped on some water you built the nerve to meet his gaze. He was studying you with a knowing smirk. 
“You should put a shirt on,” you grumbled, attention back on your nearly empty plate.
“But I thought you were enjoying the view?”
“Shut up.”
His chuckles echoed as he went back to his room to fulfill your request.
So, this was how he was going to play?
The following three weeks were more or less the same. Yixing would come up with ways to get you to fall for him once again. Cooking meals, asking you about your day, massaging your back after a long day of work. Jongin’s eyebrows blended with his hairline the day you came to work with a ginormous bouquet of flowers on your desk sent by a Zhang Yixing. He questioned you for the rest of the week, with you only pushing the subject away.
As much as you wanted to deny it, Yixing was creeping back into your heart. You were beginning to remember all the reasons you fell in love with him in the first place and he was right when he said you worked better together.
But, at the same time, you were too stubborn to give in.
The last day of the month approached faster than you thought possible and you were kind of disappointed. You liked having Yixing’s attention again, liked the feeling of being wanted by him. But, after today, he would be moving out and once he was gone, there was no way you would be able to afford it, so you would have to move out also and this chapter in your life would be over for good.
It was bittersweet.
You tried not to be in your feelings as you opened the door after work. As you entered, you froze as you took in your surroundings.
All the lights were off except one lamp and the dim lighting cast a romantic glow over the red rose petals that laid on the floor.
“Welcome back.” You heard from the darkness, catching Yixing off to the side.
“What’s all this?” You asked.
He shrugged, taking a few hesitant steps towards you. “It’s the last day.”
You felt a pang in your chest from his words, but tried to hide the pain from him. “So what do you have planned today?”
Wordlessly, he took your hand, leading you down the hall that lead to your bedroom. He paused just outside of your door, where the small square above the ceiling was open, a ladder leading up into the attic.
“After you,” he murmured, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
You threw him a skeptical glance, but climbed ahead, knowing exactly where he was taking you. Once inside the dusty attic, you went to the small triangular window, pushing it open to the roof. 
You’re left breathless at the sight in front of you.
Yixing had already been here, coating the small area in the roses that lay below you as well. There were a couple small lanterns illuminating a purple plush blanket with pillows thrown haphazardly over it. In the center was a basket that you knew had your favorite dishes in it, being you could smell them. Ahead of you, the twinkling lights of downtown glittered like stars.
This used to be your spot.
“Do you like it?” Hands are on your shoulders as Yixing climbed in from behind you, his breath tickling the hairs on your neck and you gulped.
“It’s beautiful,” you revealed, eyes watering slightly from his efforts.
“Come.” He grabbed your hand again, dragging you over to the little picnic dinner he had made. Once you two were seated, he opened the basket, revealing that he had in fact brought your favorites.
You just stared at him in awe, blown away by the amount of effort he put in so far.
“Stop staring at me,” he said with a laugh, handing you a plate. “Eat.”
“I can’t help it,” you said after taking a bite. It was delicious. “I just can’t believe you’ve done all this.”
“Why is that so hard to believe?” He asked.
You shrugged. “It’s been a while since we’ve done something like this.”
He’s quiet for a moment, chewing thoughtfully. The way the light from the lanterns bounced off his features made him appear way more beautiful than you remembered.
Once he swallowed, he gave you his undivided attention. “I wanted to take us back to the times when we first moved in. When we first found this little spot. I thought that maybe you would remember what it felt like….”
“What what felt like?” You asked.
He rubbed his neck nervously before meeting your gaze. “What it felt like to be in love with me too.”
And as you both watched each other, you thought you were beginning to.
He cleared his throat. “Anyway, finish your meal before it gets cold.”
You do as he orders, smiling contently as you watched the view and listened to the hustle and bustle of the city below. A bottle of wine somehow made its way out, and before you knew it, you were a little tipsy.
“I wanted to show you something.” Yixing said after all the food was gone. He pulled a corner of the blanket back, revealing his favorite guitar. “I’ve been writing.”
He tuned it quietly before taking a deep breath and brushing his fingers against the chords, a beautiful melody transforming from his hands. It was amazing, slow and romantic, making you picture Spain or some other magically romantic location. He was so passionate when he played; it was something you hadn’t seen in him for so long, not until this bet happened. He began humming along, slowly building his sound until he began singing.
You missed his voice so much; you forgot just how beautiful it was. Goosebumps raised on your arms; more growing once you heard what he was saying. He sang about a forgotten love, a one sided love. Yearning to turn back the clock, to go to how things once were. It was obvious what he was singing about, who in particular he wrote it for. And the pain he had been suffering through was evident to the point where you could feel it in your heart. 
He got to the bridge of the song, lamenting about the past, hitting a high note that made you shiver before changing notes swiftly, to a song that rang more familiar.
He was now singing your song.
The one he wrote for you on your first year anniversary. The one he always sang to you whenever you were alone.
“Who am I without my melody? Just a hopeful song, lyrics to sing along to….”
Suddenly it was three years ago, when he first sang it to you. You knew at that moment that he was the One. The one you were going to spend the rest of your life with. How optimistic of you? How sad.
The last chord rang into the night, being carried away with the breeze and then you were on top of him. He froze for a second uncomprehendingly, but then you heard the clang of his guitar hit the cement ground and he was kissing you back with fervor so intense it felt palpable. All that could be heard was gasping and lips smacking and it was nearly dirty--your want for him in that moment.
His hands slid under your shirt, pulling buttons open with his wrists until they rested right below your chest, his thumb brushing against your swollen flesh teasingly.
“Bedroom,” you growled between kisses and he wasted no time hiking you up so that you were able to wind your legs around his waist, pressing yourself as close to him as possible so that you could feel his hard torso through his shirt.
It was a struggle, but he was somehow able to get you both back into your house without you ever having to get off, the only thing being you had to kiss other parts of him besides his lips, but neither one of you seemed to mind.
You felt the sheets underneath you as he gently placed you on the bed before resuming what was started. He was everywhere around you, overwhelming all of your senses, leaving your body on high alert with every touch of his fingers, even his breath left you shaking with need.
“I love you,” he whispered into the skin of your stomach. “I love you so much.”
As a reply, you pulled at his hair, dragging him over you so that you could look him in the eyes. “Show me.”
~*~
Pressure on your face brought you back to reality the next day. You heard chuckling as you opened your eyes to the brightness of the day.
“Morning, Love.” You heard Yixing’s voice and glanced up to see him smiling down at you. How much wine did you drink? You could barely remember what happened the night before, but your body was sore and oh no….
You ran your hand over the sheets to check that you were indeed naked and bit your lip. How did you allow yourself to break like this?
“I was just about to jump in the shower…” Yixing said, lifting his eyebrows suggestively. “Would you like to join me?”
“Um….” You took a deep breath. “I’m okay. You go first.”
He pouted dejectedly, but got up. You tried not to stare at his bare ass as he left.
Boy, oh boy, were you in trouble!
You swiftly got up, yanking the first articles of clothing you could find and groaning once you realized the shirt was Yixing’s. Needing a distraction, you found yourself flipping pancakes in the kitchen. But, it had the opposite effect because your mind was open. You had no idea what you felt for Yixing anymore. Of course there was always affection, you were together for four years, of course there’s affection. 
As you turned the tenth one you made, you felt hands on your waist and lips on your head.
“You made breakfast.”
You spun around, taking in Yixing as he wore only basketball shorts and a towel around his shoulders and gulp. “Yeah….”
He made a plate, sitting in the same spot you had the first day of the bet. “So, when should I move my stuff back into the bedroom? 
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