#“colder than a witches tittie”

[thebearer]

ok i saw your england accent imagine and i raise you a southern reader. i’m from north carolina and my family is DEEP south so how would carmy be around the readers accent? also how would richie react?

I love the “how would richie react” because SAME lol. I too have a southern accent and I feel richie would be the worst.

carmen would think it’s cute. really what drew him to you because ya know you don’t hear that as much in chicago. I think he’d pick up on your “sayings” but say them in his very chicago accent.

“colder than a fuckin’ witches titty out here.”

“a fuckin’ what? what the fuck did you just say?” richie is FLOORED.

there’s times when you’ll say something and richie will just blink bc he has no clue. “cousin, translate.”

[carnivorousyandeere]

“Goddamn, it’s colder’n a witch’s titty out here,” you grumble.

Colder than a…? Mika’s brain screeches to a halt… then takes off at a mile a minute. Do I… is this flirting? Should I ask for help warming them up…? No, I can’t, that would be so weird… what does that even mean? I mean… I don’t wear bras but I am wearing a sweater so they’re not that cold but I could pretend they are—

“Mika? Mikaaaaa?” Your gloved hand waves in front of their face. “Earth to Mika…? ………..Gaia to Mika….?”

[casper-nova]

Part 13

Sam: It's colder than a witch’s titties in a brass bra.

Angel: You are built like a rectangle.

Hush: can't beat them, better eat them.

Damien: Whore

Freelancer: Cunt ass bitch

Huxley: Damn

Milo: How do I smell

Sweetheart: *smells* you smell nice

Asher: *hard sniff*

David: You better watch your short ass before I beat it

Milo: That's if you could reach it.

Doc: Imagine for a seculant

Hush: Seculant?

Doc: *manic laughter*

Damien: The food is touching itself

Freelancer: Of course the food is touching itself Gavin is in the room

Damien to Huxley: Eat it before it gets on you. You know I hate it when you're a mess.

David: He does have a collar?

Milo: No, that's how he got out.

[iusedtobemeanmrmustard]

Tomorrow is Day One of 4 years of WTF

And it's gonna be colder than a witch's tittie around here.

[bhaalsdeepbat]

The universe aligned in such a way that the weather is colder than a witch's titty, which means I can wear a Ghostface mask and I am going to be performing a burlesque number with it and a knife that is also a whip. Super sexy, but so many notes.

[spill-to-t]

Growing up in the Deep South of the U.S., my two favorite ways to describe weather are:“colder than a witch’s titty” and “hotter than the devil’s taint”

English is so silly billy

I’m learning this freaking language from you guys😵‍💫 Thank you very much

[minejakey]

pressing her icy cold hands to the back of poor jake's neck:

❛ hoo-wee! it's colder than a witch's titty out there, ma honey. ❜ / HHHDJFH SHE IS SO WRONG FOR THIS !!

jake jolted upright with a yelp , nearly spilling the book he’d been reading onto the floor . shoulders scrunched up as the cold shot through his spine , and he twisted his head to glare at sadie , though there wasn’t a lick of real anger in his eyes—just startled indignation .

'' sadie , darlin' , what in the hell— ! '' he shuddered , reaching back to pry her hands off his neck . '' you tryna send me to an early grave ? ''

despite his protest , there was already a fond little smile tugging at the corners of his lips . he turned around to face her properly , taking in the sight of her .

with a sigh , he shook his head and set his book down on the nearby table . '' you est get over here before you turn into an icicle , '' he muttered , already reaching out to pull her in . jake was warm , always warm , like a living furnace .

[tireironmybeloved]

[[gonna get started on making some potato soup at the request of my youngest, bc its colder than a witch's titty, so say my titties, and then I'm gonna try to be around, so feel free to send memes or anything else my way <3]]

[artcalledwind]

I heard

Colder than a witches titty in a brass bra

Now I understand

Cannon balls in copper surrounding form

Fuckin colder than an Ice Dagger from any fantas

Turn picture to see MM up

It’s in side wood

[ariatwang]

IT'S COLDER THAN A WITCH'S TITTY IN A BRASS BRA

[spiderxbatty]

"Damn,it's colder than a witches titty up in this bitch! I maybe undead..but I still feel the cold. Looks like I'm taking out my thicker dresses today. Be safe out there,everyone."

[howlgrowlsnarl]

Attention All Witches: My upbringing suggests that it is indeed colder outside than your titties in a brass bra. Let me remind all of you that "Steampunk" cosplay, brass bras included, was banned during the Great Parkour War of 2007. Many Hot Topic Asst. Managers gave their lives that day. Some went on to become Goodreads horror book reviewers. Others became community glory holes for narcissistic subgenre's & Mad Lib's prose pirates. Keep those nipples warm, ladies. For all our sakes...

[ultimatedemonsimp]

I know I was complaining about heat-fics, so here's a new version. (Also, I ship Simeon x Solomon, with Luke is their son, but I mention it jokingly, here.)

Instead of animal-like heat, it's litterally just them feeling unbearable heat. Not sexual, just smoldering hot, because I think the Devildom is usually colder than a witches titty.

Lucifer's talks all big about bearing it, but he has to move all of his work and shit into his room so his brothers won't walk in on him filling out papers half naked with 4 air conditioners and 20 fans running on high.

Mammon is exclusively whining about it, nothing else. He's not doing anything to help himself, just sitting in his room and complaining.

Levi surprisingly has the easiest time. His DDD and all of his consoles and computers are extra Devildom waterproof, so he'll just hop into his demon form and cool off in freezing water.

Satan is not staying inside so he can be interrupted by the bitching of his brothers, he's taking an entire bookshelf worth of books and hauling them up somewhere with lots of wind. His heat is the lightest so it doesn't take much more than a breezy mountain top for him.

Asmo has turned his private bathroom into a cold sauna for the time being.

Beel is the one who's still gonna work out. He's gonna eat thrice the time he usually does, but still, he's dedicated to the grind.

Belphie living his best life, he can sleep where ever he wants without needing a blanket... is what he first thought. Now he suffers in silence. Had Beel install two air conditioners in the attic.

Diavolo is actually living the dream during heat seasons, all the servants install extra air conditioners in the palace, so he's good. While he's inside, at least.

Barbatos is also alright, given the fact that he still needs to follow him around.

Angels have "chill seasons," which are the same as "heat seasons," but they get cold instead of hot, because think the Celestial realm is hot as balls, both seasons start to occur between 6-10 y/o in their respective worlds' time.

Simeon is huddled up in his wings and blankets on blankets, still shivering. Michael takes a little bit to visit and bring a few things to help.

Luke has it worse considering he's young, our poor son in bundled up in his bed shaking like a leaf and almost crying when Michael visits. Eats warm food in his insulated igloo of blankets.

Solomon just stays in purgatory hall helping his husband and son while silently laughing at them.

I made this because I, personally, don't think that demon or angels actually need to procreate, and, therefore, would not need an actual heat season.

I'm pretty sure either they are created by the overall representative of their world (Angels are created by the bros' father/god, Demons are made by the Demon King/Dia's father) or they come from dead humans. Both of which would lead to, humans being the only race to be actually born (which would make sense with Luke because why would you let your son, who has somewhere between a hatred for and a fear of demons, go to the Devildom, knowing he could very easily get hurt, especially with the way he talks), similarly that Demons are the only race who make pacts, and Angels being the only ones to give blessings (but IDK about that, I still have a ways to go in the story).

I went off on a tangent there, sorry, I hope you guys liked this and I also hope you've drank you water today.

[ambercast]

Declan grinned, grabbing his coat and gloves happily, more than willing to hang out with G. “I never want to bother you with the radio. I mean, you might be in the middle of getting laid and I don’t want to be a cockblock.” He pulled on his coat as he stepped outside with G. “Do you want to go to that ice skating party at the lake? It could be fun. I don’t know why it’s called colder than a witch’s tit by the way. Wouldn’t a witch have warm titties just like everyone else?”

Declan glanced around as he heard someone call out his name. He broke into a grin when he saw G outside, and jogged over, clapping the guard at the door on the shoulder. "It's okay! That's just G. My best friend! Hi G!" He gestured for his friend to enter the Commune. "We don't have to stay here. We can go for a walk. I wanna catch up! I miss you." He pulled a face. "You're always off kissing your girlfriend. Which, I get it. She's really hot! But I want G-time too."

[annikasafternoonread]

In the description, “the room was colder than ten witches’ tits,” would that be the tits of ten witches (so presumably twenty titties) or ten tits belonging to presumably five witches?

This is the kind of important question you follow me for. 

[cactfold]

Bro it's fucking colder than a witch's titty in this goddamn house I'm in