#“But it does make his husband some kind of monsterfucker”

[colorlessjay]

Oh my Jack, I’m obsessed with your BTTF AU.

I know it might not quite fit into your AU but I’ve been giggling to myself about the potential hilarious misunderstandings. My fav being s6 Dean attempts to put together all the little clues Cas has dropped about his husband but like comically wrong (plugged-all-the-numbers-into-the-right-formula-and-somehow-got-the-wrong-answer wrong)

Dean in the guest bedroom with sticky notes and red string: ok so he wears flannels and he has an Impala that looks suspiciously like baby and cas mentioned he had hair longer than mine and that he was a hunter and Sam and I knew him and they were friends for a while before anything romantic happened, and I’m clearly not hanging out with cas as much …

Dean (having a panic attack): son of a bitch I know who cas is married to!

Dean (mopey and despondent and slightly horrified the next day and definitely not with puffy eyes): Cas, I, I have to know, your husband, it’s not *gulp*

Cas (visibly worried he’s given too much away and s6 dean is still so repressed that the bi realization is throwing him into despair)

Dean whispering (trying not to vomit): Sam?

Cas (too stunned to hold back his reaction): *hysterical laughter* oh, no, dean! I’m not married to sam.

Dean (nearly passing out from relief): thank god!

Cas (under his breath): this is why my dean asked me to love him anyways when his past self asked an incredibly stupid question

Honestly I fucking love that so much, I think I have a way to shoe horn that into the AU

kinda like this:

It's been two days

It's been two days stuck in the future, and Dean feels frustration bubbling up in him as his brain tries to puzzle piece everything together

It doesn't help that Cas won't tell him shit

Best friend my ass!

Okay, maybe he's being a bit of an asshole saying that. Cas- This Cas has been nothing but a great host. He always has food in the fridge, he has extra clothes he lets Dean borrow, he doesn't get all up in Dean's personal space like his Castiel does

But at the same time, Cas keeps giving him these looks, like he knows something Dean doesn't

which sure, yeah, he knows a whole hell of a lotta things. It's the future. But Cas us smug about it. At least it feels like he's smug about it. It doesn't help that Cas is out of his holy tax accountant get up and dresses like a regular John. Least his taste in band shirts has improved thanks to his husband

Husband

yeah, that still causes a record scratch in Dean's brain every time he thinks about it

And he's got no problems with it! Love is love and all that. Who Cas wants to take home and put a ring on is his own business. It's not like Cas is a guy, he's an angel. A beam of holy light or whatever. So technically, he's not gay (Not that Dean would have a problem with that!). But it does make his husband some kind of monsterfucker

which is also totally fine. Cas is a catch. Good for both of them

So why doesn't Cas say who his husband is?

Is he scared Dean would judge him? Well fuck him for that! Dean's not a homophobe! And Cas is his best friend! He'd be supportive of him and his monsterfucker husband! Rainbow streamers with Cthulhu and all!

Unless Cas is more worried about Dean's reaction to who he's married to...

which is dumb. From what little Cas told him about Mr. Mystery (Cas refuses to tell him his last name), he wears a shit ton of plaid flannels, he cooks a lot with Cas, likes to read (a guess he got from the 'shared library' Cas showed him), is pretty handy around the house, has long stupid hair and loves his dog Miracle...

Holy shit

Dean was on his feet before he even knew what he was doing. He practically kicks down the guest room door and runs around the house looking for that damn Angel/half angel/not angel

He finds Cas in the backyard with Miracle, playing fetch on the wide stretch of land he owns

Cas looks all too comfortable in his loose, light washed jeans and Metallica shirt, his hair wind swept, probably from running around with Miracle while Dean took a nap.

Cas spots Dean approaching and waves at him with a smile, only to drop both as he sees Dean's determined march

Dean can't blame him. He has no idea what he looks like right not but he knows what he feels

like he's gonna explode

"Dean-" Cas starts but never gets to finish as Dean grabs the future version of his best friend by his shoulders and holds him still, grounding himself as he speaks

"Did you marry Sam?"

The question hung in the nice summer air for around two, three beats. Miracle even pausing where she sat with a stick in her mouth, her little head tilted to the side

Cas' usual stoic face breaks into surprise and Dean holds his breath

Only for Cas, Angel of the Lord, to burst out into an explosive laughter that rocks Dean's entire being

Suddenly Dean has no idea how to react, because Cas is... he's got the biggest, gummiest, most hysterical laugh he's ever seen. It completely transforms his face that Dean is questioning if he's still taking nap, and this was all just some weird dream where he thinks Cas is almost...

cute

Get it together, Winchester!

By the time Dean shakes away his shock, Cas is already on the ground, on his back, clutching his sides as he laughs into the sky like Dean just told the joke of the century

"Hey!" Dean snaps, his face feeling warm for reasons he doesn't have time to think about. "Answer the damn question!"

"No! Hahaha!" Cas says in between laughs, Miracle coming to his side to paw and bark at her owner

"Why the fuck not???"

"No I mean-" Cas takes a deep breath and wheezes, coughing into his fist as he tries to get himself together

Dean grumbles impatiently, popping a squat just to poke at Cas' arm to get him to answer

Eventually Cas' laughter does die down and Dean finds himself staring at just the biggest, smuggest grin he's ever seen on Cas

"I mean no, I did not marry Sam. And I believe he his reaction to you saying that would be much funnier than you asking me" Cas, for the love of God, giggles.

And it shouldn't be cute. Cas is an old man and he's giggling and Dean shouldn't feel... whatever the fuck it is he's feeling right now that's not frustration

But oddly enough he's not frustrated at all

he's relived

Is it because Sam's not gay or because Cas didn't go barking up his brother?

Why does that matter? It shouldn't. Stop thinking about it

"Dean" Cas starts, his laughing having died off and his smile softer as he stares up at Dean "Why do you ask?"

There's... there's a tone to Cas' question that Dean doesn't like. So, he does the one thing he's good at

He pushes himself up and shakes back into himself

"Well you weren't telling me jack, so I thought I'd throw in wild guesses and hope I predict something" A cool lie slip out but even he can tell Cas doesn't buy it

Damn it. Those eyes always seemed to see through him

Cas doesn't call him on his bullshit, but he knows. Dean knows he knows and it bothers him further

"Yes well. Perhaps if you keep guessing, the truth will come out eventually"

"yeah... eventually"

------------

Anyways. Drabble done. Doot doot

[gabessquishytum]

This is just crack.

It did not take all that long for Eleanor to figure out that there was something strange about Hob. He is a lovely man and she considers herself lucky to call him her husband but some things are just not adding up.

Does finding out he is immortal make her freak out a little bit? Of course. It's the 16th century and she is definitely considering the possibility of Hob being a demon or having sold his soul to one. He doesn't seem like the type for it but who knows?

The crisis blows over fairly quickly because (1) he is an amazing husband (2) if demons are involved she is already damned by now so what's there to lose? and (3) based on what she hears from her friends this is the best sex anyone has ever had so.... fuck it. Literally. She'll fuck a demon if the demon is a good husband who is amazing in bed.

You cannot convince me Eleanor, one of Hob's greatest loves, was not also completely feral and unhinged. They were bisexual monsterfuckers before it was cool.

-🍃

Oh I am CONVINCED that the Gadlens were the most notoriously weird couple to ever live in Tudor England.

A husband??? Who loves his wife??? That’s totally unfashionable and cringey to all the other aristocratic folks. Even worse, he puts actual time and effort into spending time with his son, wtf. When the other lords ask him if he’s not worried that his wife has only given him the one heir he’s all like “oh actually I insisted we try to wait a while before having another one, having Robyn was very hard on her.” WEIRD, SUPER WEIRD.

Eleanor’s lady friends are secretly totally jealous of her. Her husband encourages her to do all kinds of things and doesn’t care if she has hobbies, and he’s super stoked when he finds out that she can read Latin and Greek. Eleanor has also hinted about him doing all kinds of interesting things with his mouth which frankly sound quite sinful but also very very enjoyable.

My favourite 1589 kinky headcanon is that the Gadlens were swingers who regularly took other people to bed. Also, cucking kink from both perspectives, they both loved watching each other get fucked. I just can’t imagine that 1589 Hob didn’t get regularly railed by Marlow. If Dream hadn’t fucked off with Shakespeare he totally could have had a kinky Tudor threesome with Hob and his hot wife :(((

[messenger-of-stupidity]

NAH NAH NAH

Okay. Let's go through the thoughts of this latest update. There's a lot so buckle up buttercup.

1. Kravitas is literally so based. He's willing to spare Albus the suffering of long travel just because he's bored when typically he would enjoy Albus suffering.

2. Only Albus would risk insanity to spite a demon. Ever heard of cutting off your nose to spite your face, Albus? Seriously, these dude shot himself out of a fucking canon to stop Devlin from touching this hella cursed sword, but in typical Albus fashion when it's his safety and emotional welfare at stake common sense flies out the gods be damned window.

4. Is Kravitas really a demon or was his statement last episode about being more than that the truth that Albus just chose to call bullshit on?

5. Kerano, sweetie, if you don't like the sweater you don't gotta be nice to me and lie. Tis okay

6. Dad is back with his video of a casual demon attack. A normal Thursday. You'd think violence could slow enough for Faithful to get some groceries but I guess not.

7. AN ADULT TALK? EXCUSE ME? also yes now shoo child.

8. Guess I'll just go in a bunker and braid some hair or some shit. Whatever.

9. Don't you love it when the father figure of your child is so obsessed with transformers that he turns into a robot? (Yes I know he didn't turn into a robot. It just sounded kind of robotic in my head and it was funny.

10. What's the song called? It was kind of a vibe.

11. Oh my God we're raising a menace, thief, AND a liar. Where did we go wrong? 😭 Also can Faithful read minds? She was able to hear Kerano's mind about a key or something before Kerano had it, and was able to read the thoughts after that.

12. Move aside, Faithful is coming through like a badass. Hold the child

13. Oh neat. Both Albus and I have yelling voices in our head. 🥲

14. "I AM THE GREATEST GOOD YOURE EVER GONNA GET" - Faithful 2023

15. IS HE CUTTING OFF HIS HAND?! KERANO LOOK AWAY

16. Are... Are you seriously gonna make me choose between my two husbands right now? WHERES MY POLY OPTION? (Albus and Devlin in strictly familial relationship with each other. No condoning incest here)

-Branch-

Albus Route:

- yeah u tell him Devlin! How dare he try to reject us after saying it was our choice. Bitch

- UH I UH UHM ER

- daddy? Sorry. Daddy? Sorry. Daddy? Sorry

- HOW MANY ROUNDS? Albus let her BREATHE before you fuck her to death omg

- I thought we became a bio mom to half demon children. But nah turns out we became a slutty saint

- YOOOO another thing in common with Albus! We both don't like kids. For different reasons but the point still remains

- Awww. He misses Devlin.

- Kerano is wholesome but I ain't forgiving her for snatching that key

- wait does anyone remember when he said he wouldnt tap faithful with a ten foot pole? Does that mean he tapped her with an eleven foot pole to stay true to his word?

- Devlin Route -

- that's what your brother said to me in an alternate reality when I chose him too.

- Albus back with the orgies. My angsty brain McThinks it's some copium since that's his whole "nothing hurts me!" Mask

- "HES A ROCKIN SPACE AGE BACHELOR MAN" I hope he gets his dream of being a monsterfucker

- Faithful got that holy rizz sheeeeeeesh

- astrology 🥰

- wait nevermind. Just some brotherly love

- you can call me darling any day of the week baby. I am living for it.

- Awww starry kiss. 🥹

Update: I keep forgetting there's a high chance that GBA will see this... BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?! I STAND BY WHAT I SAID (/lh) 😤😤😤

Update #2: for those asking about the third route thoughts, that's a secret that I'm saving for a fic.

[colorfullyminded]

Star Titan Au

So after watching and finishing all of the Owlhouse (which is just an amazing show, please go watch), I kind of started to ship the Collector and King at the end. And at first I was a bit worried that maybe I'd get some complaints, but please hear me out: 1st off-- they're both demons of relatively the same age, who will also outlive most of the people they've come to know. It's kind of a sad fact-- King will outlive Eda and Luz naturally.

However, being immortal, or just ancient beings themselves, the collector and King will probably live the longest together-- either dying close to the same time, or, if they are immortal, living forever. Which, in a world where you will naturally outlive your human/witch friends/family, it's comforting knowing you have someone to stay with you through it all. 2nd: In case anyone's like (you can't ship them, they're entirely different species)-- Owlhouse has already shown multiple interspecies relationships, and literally the boiling isles is filled with diversity so that's just a bullshit excuse. Also, I know some people joke that King is a Dog Demon-- but like, he's still a demon with the ability to communicate and consent-- which does not make this bestiality, so please I don't want to hear that in any arguments. If anything this is Monsterfucker on Monsterfucker. 3rd: It's cute, and both of them have grown throughout the show, and are continuing to grow long after the show. Yes, The Collector has a lot of maturing to do, but again, they have all the time in the world, and with a friend like King, they will probably get there in time. I'm just saying, this doesn't seem like a stretch in relationship, and I really don't want to cause any drama or hate-- or antishipping.

Anyway, now that that's out of the way, what is a Star Titan?

A Star Titan is an au I came up with, where in the future, the collector and King raise 3 children who are basically a mix of both their species. In a way, their designs would be reminiscent of Wolf Children

A mix of both celestial humanoid being, who either has the ears, tail, and markings of a Titan, or can shift into something more Titan like.

Since it's implied that King's species reproduce asexually, he will most likely have the children-- though I still think it will be a mix of both their DNA. The children will be as mischievous as the Collector at his age, and now an older, wiser Collector must deal with the realization that this is what he used to be like when they were young. They have infinite power of both a titan and an archivist.

Their Children are in Order: Selene -She/They: The oldest (Literally named after the titan personification of the moon) Lunaris -They/Them: The Middle child Moon Moon -He/They: The youngest (And yes, that is their canon name, no I don't take criticism. The collector and King both thought it was funny, and Moon Moon loves it. So does Hunter, he also thinks it's hilarious!) I need to come up with designs, but this is sort of the vague idea. King and the Collector love their children, and the Collector has made it known if their siblings try to do anything to their husband or children....they will meet a very painful end. And just the two raising three very powerful beings together, along with the rest of the family (Grandma Eda, Great Aunt Lilith, Auntie Luz and Amity....Hootie), and not only saving King's species, but creating a whole new species together.

So uhm....thoughts?

[redandblackpoetry]

ur writing is top-tier so no worries there, and it's very writer of u to say u like to break characters and put them back together. fic writers are a different breed istg LMAO

eldritch monsters and their workings being left vague is actually v interesting to me bc what ppl don't know, they fear, so it's actually a good way to write horror stuff i feel like. however the good lil student in me who has taken kind of detailed biology lessons several years ago says that i am very much grateful for and on board with u giving them a nerf in the sense of needing nutrition bc FUCK IT i tried to explain and continue this sentence but after failing to get out what i wanted to say and deleting my words like 4 times, i've come to the conclusion that i'm too lazy to get into its details but. yeah it makes sense. anyway it's insane to read that cthulhu is ghost's nephew from a neutral point of view, i hope u know. i wanna learn more abt this where is my time machine i need to go to a point of time in which this fic is finished and all my questions are answered so that i can come back and bug u abt how much i loved reading it

also this fic made me google lovecraft a bit and. is it just me or does he look a bit like samuel roukin. am i crazy???? simon riley is canonically h. p. lovecraft confirmed????

for the remembering details stuff, idk abt other readers but i am abysmal at it. which is why i actually forgot u've mentioned roach before, i caught that detail at the time but i wait one day and my brain bluescreens so i was like will roach be here? that's why i reread ur entire fic from the start when there's an update so i don't miss anything. anyway 6-story-tall-but-somehow-still-smol!ghost is like actually one of my favorite things now bc considering what he is and how simon's body is like BUILT is hilarious to me. imagining him pulling the 'but i'm tiny' card on some situation and the rest of the 141 going 'the fuck did u say bitch???' is just amazing. also gaz going 'yes u are' and metaphorically squishing his cheeks would be insanely brilliant, so.

oh and simon and ghost are murder bfs btw. that's their duo name. u can thank me for it later. bUT HOLD THE FUCK UP TF DO U MEAN UR CONSIDERING WRITING THE ONE THING I TOLD U I WAS SCARED OF SEEING??? PLS NO (do it it'd be so funny) (by funny i mean i'd have a breakdown and start sobbing uncontrollably) (do it anyway, i wanna see the world burn)

monsterfucker simon is. i approve. i am physically grinning after reading that paragraph, i hope u know. he's like 'fucking monsters up since 2009' *sees ghost* 'my bad, let me correct myself: fucking monsters since 2009' anyway i am very pleased to have gotten u thinking abt naughty soap/ghost/simon bc. i am like !!!! at the idea of reading ur take on that dynamic v much!!!!!!!! pls soap would be so over his head i am. i'm Interested. (making that my motto these days thanks to u)

mermay roach!!!!!! he's!!!! baby!!!!! he deserves the spotlight!!!!!! yes pls!!!!!!!!! my inbox is open and also i am ready to spare my leftover one and a half neurons for this as it is a worthy cause, tyvm

but yeah venom is my hidden obsession. and now that u've mentioned it yeah that plot is v close to it and. i'm. i'll sob. i'll actually sob wait please venom au goes so hard with ur ghost????? i'll cry i can't believe this fic doesn't exist in this very second, i'll sit down and have a temper tantrum like a 5yo right this second bc all these ideas we've talked abt so far aren't existing in like a 100k+ fic form that i can read to sleep tonight bc that's a travesty, how dare the world inconvenience me like this?????

the length of these asks are making me feel like a poor, stranded wife in the 1900s sending letters to her soldier husband who is off to fight in a war btw. come back home mutual, i miss u <3

Fic writers truly are a different breed, its honestly fascinating how popular hurt/comfort fics are, tho I do understand it

I am constantly at war with myself over how much do I explain versus how much do I leave up to the mystery/horror of it. I'm glad you enjoyed my giving them nutrition! Would you believe I'm kinda terrible with biology and several of the squishy sciences? Because I absolutely am, history and literary analysis was always my stronger suits. And yeah its bonkers to say shit like Cthulhu is Ghost's nephew without any context, you're gonna love the next chapter because family tree shits gonna get crazy

If you invent a time machine can you let me know so I can also read my own fic and take notes?

And I did not realize they looked so similar before! Huh!

And you reread my fic when there's a new chapter??? Can you hear by brain bluescreen?

1,000% thats how it would go, Gaz would be like 'absolutely a tiny and adorable (giant) Ghost', Soap would be somewhere between turned on by the size different and baffled swearing about how hes a big motherfucker, Price would be like 'if Ghost is the small one how big are his kind usually?'

Hell yeah murder boyfriends! (And you're in luck because I sometimes like burning the world)

I'm glad you approve of monsterfucker simon lol, glad I made you smile! Soap would definitely be in over his head, but he would definitely enjoy every minute of it, I think he would like being ruined in the best way possible (and I will accept that motto of yours gladly)

Darling, sweet roach! My problem is I love developing characters and worlds but plot, I suck at making a plot. I might consult your askbox in the future for wisdom

I am also upset that these ideas arent 100k fics and given time I'll roll up my sleeves and say if no one else will I'll do it myself, god I love the idea of a venom au

I will gladly accept your letters while I'm off in the War (different time zone), love hearing from you as always. I await your next letter, beloved mutual as I fight in the trenches of poly 141 ideas

[jaskiersbow]

Eskel getting taken down by a tentacle monster and ahem, being made into a very sticky and worn out Witcher who might not be able to walk or talk very well for the next few days. 😉

So I talked to the original requester, and they wanted Letho but I wasn’t sure about writing him.  But I tried anyway!  So have some Letho/Tentacle monster smut under the cut.

Explicit. Warnings: tentacles, monsterfucking, non con

Letho left his horse in town, because the bay where the supposed monster was attacking people was a short walk from town. He doesn't entirely buy that there actually is a problem, because the monster apparently attacked two young maidens who told their fathers that they were inappropriately assaulted. It almost sounds like unmarried women appeasing their parents by coming up with a reason why their husband shouldn't expect a virgin in their wedding bed. But, coin is coin, and people are willing to pay for him to investigate.

The beach is clear, and there's no sign of anything moving in the water. Letho looks around, but there are no tracks in the sand, and there's no strange scents in the air. He figures he should at least check the water before telling the townspeople they're confused, so he tugs off his boots and wades in.

There's nothing along the shore, but as he walks along the beach, he stumbles upon a little cove. The water is clear, and there's nothing monstrous looking, just a few fish and a bunch of coral and seaweed. There's a crystal clear view down to the bottom, and it's not even worth the killer whale he downed on the way to the beach. The water looks to be about twice his height deep, so he can easily swim down to investigate.

There's no point in getting his armor soaked for this, so he climbs up on one of the large rocks surrounding the cove. After studying the water for a moment, he decides a dagger should be enough protection since there isn't actually anything in there. He unstraps all his gear and then strips down to his smalls. Dagger in hand, he slips back into the water and dives under.

The water is nice and cool, and the visibility is amazing. Letho swims down, scanning for anything out of the ordinary. Nothing calls to him, and he's about to write this off as daughters lying to their fathers, but then something catches his eye. There is a large clump of some odd looking seaweed tucked along the rocks to one side. He swims closer and can see that it's not seaweed at all, but he's not sure exactly what it is either.

Whatever it is doesn't seem sentient. It's a mass of what look like octopus tentacles, just kind of clumped together in a bush? A weird plant to be sure, but it doesn't seem like the kind of monster the village sent him here for. He reaches out with his dagger to poke the plant and suddenly a thick tentacle wraps around his wrist. He's shocked but holds on to the dagger and tries to swipe at the thing, but another tentacle comes up and slaps the weapon from his hand.

All of a sudden, it's like the plant grew five times in size. Though he's seriously starting to believe it's not actually a plant. His bestiary doesn't have anything in it like this shit, because he for sure would have remembered it. He tries to fight his way to the surface, but this thing is strong. Letho wedges his fingers under the tentacle wrapped around his wrist, but even with all the strength he has, it's not coming loose.

He's so focused on the one around his wrist, that he almost misses the tentacle climbing up his thigh. It wraps around his thick thigh, not letting go even as he swats at it. Quickly deciding that it's way more important to get to the surface before his potion wears off than to get free, he starts swimming upwards. It's almost as if the creature knows Letho needs air, because it moves with him, letting him make his way past the water's surface and take a deep breath.

Once his head is above water, Letho is able to shake the water out of his eyes and look closer. The thing he thought was a plant is most definitely not. The tentacles holding him are lined with tiny suckers, and they're stuck to him pretty good right now. He tugs at the one wrapped around his wrist one last time, but nothing moves. His sword sits abandoned on the rock across the cove, doing him no good right now.

In a last ditch effort, he starts thrashing around, but all that gets him is water in his face and the tentacles tighten around his limbs. More start creeping up his legs, spreading them wider. Letho pales, wondering if there was more to the woman's story than he anticipated. Growling, he does his best to glare at the creature, but he can't find a head or face to look at, just a growing mass of tentacles that are quickly overtaking him.

The beach and little cove are empty, so there's no point in shouting, but he does anyway. It's not everyday an angry bundle of tentacles gets the best of you, and Letho is fucking pissed. Even though it doesn't do much, it makes him feel a little better. That is until a thin tentacle creeps up his throat and pushes past his open lips.

Letho tries to spit it out, but the tentacle pushes deeper, almost touching the back of his throat. He breathes through his nose and tries to figure a way out of this. Then the damn thing starts flooding his mouth with something sweet and sugary. There's no way to avoid swallowing it, and it feels warm on the way down.

All of a sudden he's burning up, his skin too hot and tight. He feels his prick harden in his smalls and growls down at it. Of course the damn thing has aphrodisiac slime. This is just getting better and better. He's held still at this point, unable to move anything as the creature has its way with him. At least he's covered.

He spoke too soon, because the next two tentacles slide under his smalls and rip them to shreds. He should be fighting more, but whatever is trickling down his throat has him too messed up to make much of a racket. It's like his body is just going along with it, his cock fully hard even in the cold water, and he's burning up and aching to feel more.

Somehow it spreads his legs wider, and he can feel the strain in his thighs. Then there's a teasing press at his hole, the thin tip of a smaller tentacle rubbing against him. It feels slick, and he realizes the creature must have more of whatever if pouring down his throat right now. He knows he should fight more, but it feels so fucking good at his entrance and he can't help moaning around the tentacle in his mouth.

The tentacle shoves inside of him, eased by its slick. It's thicker than two fingers, but he opens easily for it, and he wonders what the fuck he's drinking right now. Letho's a big man, but his body is so lethargic and docile right now. All he can do is float there and let the creature stretch him open.

His cock is throbbing, and he wishes he could get a hand on it. If he's going to be fucked, he should at least get off. Thankfully the beast must read minds, because a tiny tentacle slinks up his thigh and curls around the base of his cock. It starts twisting as it moves from base to tip, pulling him off quickly.

He's so hard, so close to coming, and he lets out another moan as he struggles to choke down more of the sweet substance flowing into his mouth. The one pushing into his ass retreats, and he thinks there's going to be a break, but another - much thicker - one lines up and presses at his rim, taunting him before it slowly slides inside of him. His scream is muffled by the tentacle in his mouth, but his eyes water at the thick stretch in his hole.

The burn quickly turns into pleasure as he's fucked harder than he has been in ages. It's so thick and he's full to the brim, he bets if he looked down he would see it pushing his belly out. Only he can't move right now, can barely think as the tentacles work him over. He feels his orgasm building at the base of his spine, and he knows it won't last long. Only then the small tentacle jerking him off moves higher and presses inside the tip of his cock. He screams as it shoves inside of him, effectively cutting him off. There's no way he can come like this.

Letho starts going fuzzy, his mind not able to keep up with everything that's happening. He can feel the sucker-covered tentacles winding around him, curling around his thighs and arms and circling his chest. He writhes the best he can when they slide over his nipples, brushing him and coating his chest with more slick. He's used to being in charge, used to using his size and training to take over a situation, but he simply can't do that here.

The tentacle in his ass starts throbbing, and he's so full he aches with it. It feels like something is building up, like the creature is getting close to whatever the goal here is, but Letho is too strung out to focus on anything but the stretch and the slide of the tentacles across his skin. The one in his mouth slides out suddenly, and he screams, throat raw.

It takes way too long to realize that he's crying, sobbing silently as the creature has its way with him. The tiny tentacle inside his prick withdraws slowly, tugging at him from the inside as it moves. It curls around him again, pumps him once, twice, and then he's shooting off, coming so hard his vision goes white.

As his ass clenches, he can feel the creature filling him with something, his body expanding even more to take in the thick liquid. In the back of his mind, he knows it's seed, that he's being pumped full of the beast's spend, but he's too wrecked to make much sense of it.

All at once, the tentacles start to leave. He goes from being full to empty and gaping. It's nice enough to lift him onto the rocks at the side of the cove, setting him down next to his gear. He watches with heavy eyes as a tentacle comes up and gently strokes his cheek. His last thought before passing out is "fuck."

[khiroptera]

Do you have any fic recs? Smut preferably? If not it cool

this anon asked so long ago but i took forever bc i had to finish reading stuff! i feel like a librarian (in a good way). which speaking of librarians, have you pals checked out @aziraphales-library bc they got lots of fic recs over there too! never go a day without some peer-reviewed gomens fics LMAO

anyway, smutty fics ahead! heavy sexual content!! under a cut this time bc there’s quite a few in here.

first, some links to carsextober fics because they were fun as fuck and i want to make sure everyone reads them! they’re all different flavors of sex in the bentley:

I’ll Be Wrapped Around Your Finger by @soft-october-night​ – fluffy, humorous take, established relationship, outsider POV, implied sex, everyone in soho ships them

and in this way their love rewrites the universe by @letmetemptyou – fluffy, established relationship, very romantic, lots of cute build-up, explicit sex, i’m dead they’re so in love

as certain dark things by @drawlight – lots of pining and desperate longing, quiet sexual tension, first time, explicit sex, switching, killed me with yearning omfg

you hit the spot by @weatheredlaw – oops they got stuck in the car, established relationship, seriously filthy, marathon sex, no refractory period, this poor bentley lol

and then some other very good, non-thematic fics (all explicit)!

tar was dripping from his brush by @chrononautintraining – crowley and aziraphale hold hands on a park bench for three days straight when aziraphale realizes “oh he might be willing to have sex with me.” it’s a first time fic but they’re both really playful and comfortable with themselves and each other! i like a little giggly happiness with my smut, A+

blame it on my juice, baby! by @areyougonnabe – it’s a fake love potion fic (the tag ”fun with the placebo effect” should tell you everything lol). these fools fall for a little prank and end up revealing everything to each other. emotionally, and physically. omg they’re such soft fools…. i love them so much 😭

until you say it out loud by @areyougonnabe – yeah ANOTHER one of theirs, because hhhhhhfhfhf. this one, oh my god. this is a very wound up, nervous kind of crowley, and an aziraphale who does such a good job of taking care of him and showing him he’s loved. with sex, of course. 😘

The Sharper Edge by @spockazilla – aziraphale appreciates crowley’s more demonic traits. very short and sweet and cute with just a bit of smut tbh, but i had to put it on here because (despite being a monsterfucker myself) i’m not always into the husbands having like, eldritch appearances. this is just some light stuff, like crowley getting some claws, and i like it a lot! ❤

to steal light from dawn by @focusfixated – crowley wants aziraphale to decide when he gets to finish, as it were. problem is, crowley wasn’t exactly clear about what he wants. i won’t lie, this gets feelsy and kind of sad thanks to miscommunication issues, but they work it out beautifully by the end and it’s very very satisfying, emotionally. also satisfying in other ways too, bc the porn is real nice!! 👌👌👌

When in Rome by @reserve – i read this a good few months ago and it stuck with me. the husbands are both present at an orgy and they get handsy with each other. very sexy, with hints of pining and crowley very obviously being in love already. not gonna lie, the end is kinda sad but it’s mostly to keep the story canon-compliant – it does take place in rome, so there’s still 2000 years for them (mostly aziraphale) to get their shit together 😏

These Captive Stars by @darlingred1 – i didn’t think i was into thigh-fucking. turns out i am into thigh-fucking, at least as far as this story is concerned. so yeah it’s pretty hot, but also very loving and sweet from aziraphale’s POV, how much he wants crowley to know he loves and trusts him 😭 11/10 i love it

[thefloatingstone]

In 2012 I did not think I’d be able to make this list as I was convinced anime was on a permanent decline towards nothing but trash, but I am so happy that has changed! And so I give you a quick list of;

Favourite Anime made in the last 4 years!

Mob Psycho 100 (2016)

A no brainer, really. With a 2nd Season having JUST premiered earlier this week, MP100 is easily one of not only best LOOKING animes in a very very long time, but also one with an extremely strong empathetic message that’s completely opposite to most shounen anime. The theme of “having outrageous powers doesn’t make you any more or less special and important than any other human being” and how all the villains in the show are people, either super powered or not, who believe themselves “more important” than others is at the heart of its story. And our protagonist who is a person with horrifically strong powers, but who is trying to develop as a human being, and finds himself to be a rather emotionally brittle person who relies very heavily on others for emotional support. As well as focusing on the people willing to grant him that. It’s got some strong influential roots in the Earthbound and Mother 3 games and despite never saying anything along those lines, I can bet you anything the original Mangaka, ONE, drew heavy inspiration from their tone and presentation, as well as emotional core despite the oftentimes wacky setting.

The anime should also not be overlooked for its incredible Sakuga sequences, as well as using mixed media in its animation from pencil drawings, to paint of glass, to charcoal to sand, cementing it as easily one of the most visually interesting and ambitious shows in the last decade or so

Made in Abyss (2017)

An anime that understands concepts of Scope and Scale and manages to bring what is normally reserved for feature films to an episodic storyline. Made in Abyss’ entire theme and story is that of exploration of the unknown and everything in this anime’s power is honed to bring across that feeling. Its art direction headed by Osamu Masuyama whose previous work include working on the background art for both Spirited Away and Howl’s Moving Castle, is painstakingly rendered to bring as much gravitas to the setting as possible, aided by the soundtrack written by Kevin Penkin which is just as much atmospheric as it is musical in nature. Every ounce of talent is focused on making Made in Abyss’ world, culture and characters feel solid and real. And unlike other anime with cutesy art styles but dark subject matter, Made in Abyss’ darker tone is established right in the first episode and gradually builds to its first season’s climax, rather than blindside its audience out of nowhere.

I sincerely cannot sing this show’s praises enough.

It also doesn’t hurt that the animation itself is fluid and lively.

Re:Creators (2017)

When I gave this to an animator friend of mine, one who is NOT as big a weeb as I am, he referred to it as “if Ready Player One actually knew what it was doing.” Re:Creators is one of a trend of some anime where the narrative is extremely meta in nature, but rather than use this as a form of parody, Re:Creators instead focuses itself on using its meta storytelling to shine a light on Japanese popular media as a whole, both from the side of the creators who MAKE such things, as well as the side of the fans and not only their response to media, but their interpretation and addition to popular media. And unlike the more critical approach several horror anime have taken in the past, Re:Creators also shows the positive effect stories in the form of anime, video games, manga etc both on those who read it as well as those who create it. And show how fan creations and their responses and reaction to media are just as important and enriching to works like this as the very people who create them.

It’s also one of the first shows from any country that correctly portrays what online fan culture is like. Both good AND bad.

Erased (2016)

HOO BOY. The Big Guns. Most mainstream anime set in a modern setting inevitably seem to involve high school or at least characters who are high school aged. Erased, however, deals with a protagonist who is 28 years old. Due to time travel shenanigans, he is transported back to 1989 when he was 11 years old growing up in Hokaido. So already, this anime is complete skewing the generic setting for stories of its type, further hammered in by the fact that the show has no romantic subplot in it. There might be a smidge of something like “preteen romantic feelings” among the children but as far as “female hero the protag is going to fall in love with at the end” goes? Yeah there’s none of that.

Erased is an extremely dark anime, but not in the way Made in Abyss is dark. Whereas Abyss’ dark tone comes from things like getting eaten by monsters and body horror caused by the Abyss’ curse, the dark theme of Erased on the other hand is much more horrifying as it comes from “reality”. And it’s because of this I WILL have to warn people about its plot points because it WILL and DOES get uncomfortable.

The plot of Erased is our 28 year old protagonist gets hurled back in time to when he was 11 years old in Hokaido, as I said. In the winter of 1989 there were a string of child abductions and murders, and it’s up to our main character, again in his 11 year old body, to solve these crimes to prevent a tragedy in modern day. Not only does the show deal with the very uncomfortable topic of child abduction and murder, but a MASSIVE part of the plot revolves around the would be murder victim, Hinazaki Kayo, who is living with her physically abusive mother. And unlike shows like “Magical Girl SITE”, the abuse is not shown as “suffer porn” and blown up to be so over the top in how bad it is, ut is instead extremely grounded and feels waaaay to real to the point of being very upsetting. However, the abuse is not there to make the audience sad. The abuse is in the plot to further press upon the audience the borderline helpless state our main character is in. As a child, he has to rely on his experience and ability to think like an adult to try and prevent the serial murders, as WELL as try and get Hanazaki out of her abusive situation. It also serves as a learning experience for our main character, and him figuring out how he hasn’t changed at all since he really was a child, and how his own stagnation in life itself needs to change and be redirected. The show is bursting with tension and every episode exists to turn the stakes up just a little bit higher.

I’ve heard some people are extreme disappointed by the show’s ending which I will not spoil, but personally going into it completely blind, I didn’t find any of it to be a let down and its very quickly become one of my favourite anime of all time.

The Ancient Magus Bride (2017)

(I actually don’t like the intro to Ancient Magus Bride so it only gets a link since I can only embed 5 videos)

https://youtu.be/KuZbmLLv1vM

Based on a manga by Kore Yamazaki, who has stated that her reason for writing the story was out of frustration that in “Beauty and the Beast” type stories, the beast always turns back into a human at the end. However this anime is far more than just a monsterfucker’s romance novel (although it... DOES follow a LOT of those tropes but hear me out.)

Set in the English countryside (although our female MC, Rise, is herself Japanese) the show makes heavy use of english folklore. Faeries are a constant presence throughout the show, and these are not the “nice” kind of faeries you’d see in Disney. Despite theyr good nature and honest want to help, these are the kinds of faeries that will kidnap you to their realm if you so much as let your guard down. We also have excellent portrayals of Titania, the queen of the faeries, and her heated relationship with her husband Oberon. Several other creatures from folklore make an appearance too, as well as old traditions such as faerie rings, seeing stones and the magical properties of herbs and flowers.

But beyond all of that, and even beyond the romance tropes or monster protector who is also a threat and powerful lead female who also needs protecting, the core theme of the show is on life. Or more specifically, death. Rise is a girl who is suicidal. And despite her not making any kind of suicide attempt in the show, this is a fact. The majority of the show is focused on Rise learning to “be alive” again, as well as process what life is, as well as what death is in its many forms. The show is a slow build of Rise reclaiming her will to live, not because of a romantic partner, but for herself. Reclaiming her own importance as a person removed from who she could be useful towards, and a slow coming to terms with a truly terrible event in her past and letting go of a traumatic past.

The show has some pacing issues here and there, but I still qualify it as one of the better modern anime shows to have come out in years, and can only praise its life-affirming message it’s trying to tell.

Osomatsu-San (2015)

I am.... not entirely sure how to explain Osomatsu-San.

Based on a manga published in the 1960s by Doraemon Creator Fujio Fujiko about 6 identical sextuplet brothers and their friends... the current and newest anime adaptation has borderline nothing to do with its original incarnation which was more your typical Showa era “hi-jinx” type gag manga. I think the very first episode of Osomatsu-San (which is not available for official purchase last I checked due to copyright issues) sets up the entire show perfectly, as the 6 boys and their friends learn they have a new anime adaptation coming up and realise that nobody in the modern age will want or even understand Showa era manga. So, instead, in an effort to be like “a real anime” they go about parodying literally every popular trope and show that’s out at the time. From yaoi-incest baiting to Jpop boy band to Attack on Titan to Sailor Moon, they keep cranking up the “modern anime” aesthetic until it literally explodes and collapses in on itself. And after realising they don’t have what it takes to compete in a modern anime word, the characters resign themselves to being losers who will never achieve anything in life.... and that’s where the show starts.

I can only refer to the show as “Millennial humour: the anime.”. 90% of it is just comedy with our 6 main characters who are, at their core, pretty terrible people. However, their issues and struggles of trying to be adults make them some of the most relateable anime characters out there. The show bounces from parodying popular culture both in anime as well as in movies to outlining the problems of trying to be a late 20-something year old in modern society to actual hard hitting drama that actually makes you angry because how DARE this stupid show actually make you FEEL things???

It’s borderline impossible to try and explain this show because, just like its 6 protagonists, it doesn’t seem to have any direction in its life. Which is exactly the point.