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annavoncleves · 4 years

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the saga of henry the young king

ok so, henry the young king, eldest (living) son of henry ii (he did have an older brother, william, but william died as a baby so in practice henry's oldest) dad's the king of england, lord of wales and ireland, count of anjou and maine and aquitaine, and eventually brittany

lots of titles, lots of sons as well, and rather than the oldest son getting everything like comes in later (unless he's an only child/only has sisters) at this point he has to share with his brothers, though he does get the Best Cut, which in this case is the kingship of england

BUT

kingdoms are a lil different to other realms, in that, whilst counties and duchys can be split whilst dad's still alive, bc those are vassals of the kingdom, the throne can't be split up, obviously

so even though henry is named 'henry the young king' (an attempt at securing the throne, after the absolute clusterfuck that happened to henry ii's mother, empress matilda, whose throne was stolen by her cousin stephen after her father's death, bc she was a) a woman, gasp and b) the lords of england didn't think SWEARING AN OATH TO RECOGNISE HER AS QUEEN BEFORE THEIR KING AND PEERS was BINDING ENOUGH, so that henry's chosen heir would. actually get the throne when he died) he has no actual power

which tbh, looking at his record, is probably a good thing, bc although he thought a lot of himself, he wasn't actually that great a leader of men

he was a very good jouster tho, but that's neither here nor there

SO. henry ii is king. henry the young king is basically the king-in-waiting, whilst all his legitimate* younger brothers get THEIR inheritances (well, richard and geoffrey do, getting aquitaine and brittany. john - later known as bad king john, yes the bad guy in robin hood, he's based off THIS john - is the youngest and doesn't get shit, gaining him the nickname 'lackland')

*henry ii was a bit of a slut, but all kings were, and was actually pretty good to his bastard sons, by the standards of the day, anyway. he made one of them an important bishop and gave the other a position at court. fun fact, when henry ii does eventually die, it's one of his illegitimate sons at his bedside, and none of his legitimate sons

[in the words of the astounding @searchingforserendipity25: “to be the only illegitimate son at that bedside, crowded by all those absences” damn queen, go off]

BUT. henry the young king, king in name, but JUNIOR king, and only titular. younger brothers get their lands. he's pissed.

daaaaad, he whines, i want a go at ruling now

i'm ruling now, wait your turn, henry ii says

no, fuck you, henry the young king says and starts a rebellion

despite being... well, a bit useless, henry the young king is VERY popular (idk, bc he was moderately handsome and good at jousting?? it makes no sense to me why the people liked him as much as they did, he didn't exactly do anything to earn their love or allegiance as far as i can see) and quite a few lords get behind him

also wanting a bigger portion than they've been given, richard and geoffrey join the rebellion, bc they want more of that sweet, sweet land, as does their mother eleanor of aquitaine who fell out with her husband at some point

henry ii, against all expectations, successfully puts down the rebellion and henry the young king et al are in troubleeee, but henry ii can't afford to really punish his ungrateful offspring as much as he'd probably like, so he goes the other way and gives henry the young king a nice big allowance to keep him happy, which works for a little bit

then henry the young king, beautiful imbecile that he is, decides he's gonna rebel again. it ends the same way. he's just not very good at war, is the only conclusion i can come to

SO the second rebellion is in progress (henry the young king is allied with his brother geoffrey again, but not richard, who appears to have learned his lesson... for now. richard does rebel again later, but he waits for the right moment, proving he had some degree of intelligence that the other two... lacked) when henry the young king gets sick

i'm gonna have to copy and paste from wikipedia for this bit to explain what he was sick WITH bc there is no way i can beat this: "[Henry] had just finished pillaging local monasteries to raise money to pay his mercenaries [when] he contracted dysentery at the beginning of June."

you heard that right

he got dysentry whilst PILLAGING CHURCHES

it was a real Bruh moment for karma

anyway, he starts getting sicker and sicker until it becomes clear He Ain't Surviving This, at which point he does what a lot of people do when faced with the reality of their own mortality: say 'oh shit, i fucked up' and try and apologise

he's also pretty out of it so at some point in a presumably feverish stupor 'as a token of his penitence for his war against his father, he prostrated himself naked on the floor before a crucifix'. just stripped off, got on his belly, presumably in one of the few moments he was not shitting himself, and says 'lol my bad'

unfortunately for henry the young king, he's got form for being a tricksy, underhanded bitch. (seriously, why was he so popular?? enquiring minds - mine - would like to know) and when the messenger gets to his dad saying 'welp, i'm dying, i'm real sorry about the wars, come see me on my deathbed?

henry ii takes one look at that and goes: 'he's not really dying, is he?’

the messenger: uh. yeah. really dying.

henry ii: sounds fake

the messenger: no, he's really really sorry and really really dying

henry ii: this is Definitely A Trap

so henry ii isn't gonna be taken to a secondary location to get imprisoned or murdered by his rebellious son, which u can't entirely blame him for, considering henry the young king is currently In The Process Of Attempting To Depose Him when this all goes down, BUT henry ii also figures that if his son really is dying, and he doesn't grant him forgiveness, then he's gonna be haunted by that shit/his son won't find peace/bad things will happen. so he takes one of his rings and gives it to the messenger and says, take this to my son as a token of my forgiveness. the ring couldn't come from anyone else, so henry the young king will know it really comes from his father, and henry ii doesn't get possibly murdered, so everybody wins!

messenger goes back to henry the young king, who we presume has now got some clothes on, or at least a strategically placed sheet, and gives him the ring. as expected, henry the young king dies soon after, get this, holding the ring that his father sent him.

like. i don't think he was a good king. i don't think he would've been a good king. but. he dies holding onto this ring. and he's got a lot of people around him, but his dad isn't there, just this ring.

when henry ii gets the news that henry the young king is really, really dead now, he is meant to have said the absolute soul-crusher of a quote that made me want to tell you this whole saga in the first place: "He cost me much, but I wish he had lived to cost me more."

like??? this kid tried to overthrow his dad. TWICE. he spent all the money his dad gave him and then some, which led to the aforementioned pillaging monasteries, he signed up to go on crusade that his dad specifically told him not to fucking go on (which he died before he could fulfil)... he did EVERYTHING wrong. like. so much.

and his dad just wants his pillaging, disobedient and wasteful son back.

and that is the story of henry the young king, the only junior king england ever had.

#henry the young king #henry ii #the plantagenets #plantagenet era #angevin empire #storytime!#yes i did copy and paste this from my ims with searchingforserendipity25 bc she told me it was good #yes i know it will get no notes #history #british history #english history #we love a dysfunctional family

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combat-wombatus · 4 years

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Anti-Asian Racism (Pt. 2)

so if you haven’t read my (long) post about historical anti-asian racism, you can find it here. i tried my best to put things in chronological order, so you might want to read that before you read this one!

i got really tired writing that one bc it was super long and i only covered up to like...the 1920s?? and so here’s a second part bc i couldn’t fit it all into one post oopsies

WARNING: this contains some graphic descriptions of violence. i don’t want to accidentally trigger anyone, so please read at your own discretion. however, i do feel that it is important to be educated on the parts of history that schools often overlook, so if you can handle this, please read it.

the watsonville riots—january 1930

as US nationals, filipinos had the legal right to work in the US, and employers exploited these workers relentlessly as they assumed the filipinos were unfamiliar with their rights. they were paid the lowest wages among all ethnic laborers. the immigration acts of 1917 and 1924 allowed filipinos to answer the growing demand for labor in the US, and many young filipino men migrated to the US. due to gender bias in immigration & hiring, filipino men courted women outside of their own ethnic community, contributing to mounting racial tensions. white men decried the takeover of jobs and women by filipinos and resorted to vigilantism to deal with the “third Asiatic invasion”, and filipino laborers in public risked being attacked by white men who felt threatened by them. eventually, on january 19, this culminated in 500 white men gathering outside of a filipino dance club—owned by a filipino man—with clubs and weapons intending to take the white women who lived there out and burn the place down. they were turned away by security guards and the armed owners, but returned later to beat dozens of filipino farmworkers. they dragged filipinos from their homes and beat them, threw them off the pajaro river bridge, attacked them at ranches—and at a labor camp, twenty-two filipinos were dragged out and almost beaten to death. the mob fired shots into filipino homes, killing 22-year-old fermin tobera: no one was ever charged for his murder. in stockton, a filipino club was blown up—the blast was blamed on the filipinos themselves.

many filipinos fled the country. filipino immigration plummeted. anti-filipino violence continued in california in the months after the violence ended.

japanese internment camps—1942–1945

established during ww2 by FDR through executive order 9066. shortly after the bombing of pearl harbor, FDR signed the executive order, supposedly to prevent espionage. military zones were created in california, washington, and oregon—states with a large population of japanese americans—and the executive order commanded the relocation of americans of japanese ancestry. it affected the lives of around 117,000 people—the majority of whom were american citizens. canada soon followed, relocating 21,000 of its japanese residents from its west coast. mexico did the same, and eventually 2,264 more people of japanese descent were removed from peru, brazil, and argentina to the camps in the united states.

even before the camps, discrimination ran rampant. just hours after pearl harbor, the FBI rounded up 1,291 japanese community & religious leaders, arresting them without evidence and freezing their assets. a month later, they were transferred to facilities in montana, new mexico, and north dakota, many of them unable to inform their families. most remained incarcerated for the duration of the war. the FBI searched the private homes of thousands of japanese residents, seizing “contraband” (looting).

1/3 of hawaii’s population was of japanese descent. some politicians called for their mass incarceration. 1,500 people were removed from hawaii and sent to camps on the US mainland. japanese-owned fishing boats were impounded.

lieutenant general john dewitt prepared a report filled with proven lies—such as examples of “sabotage” (cattle knocking down power lines)—and suggested the creation of military zones and japanese internment camps. his original plan included italians and germans (because we were at war with them too!) but the idea of rounding-up americans of EUROPEAN descent was not as popular.

california’s state attorney general and governor declared that all japanese should be removed at congressional hearings in february 1942. general francis biddle pleaded with the president that mass evacuation of citizens was not required, pushing for smaller, more targeted security measures. FDR didn’t listen, and signed the order anyways.

around 15,000 japanese americans willingly moved out of prohibited areas. inland states were not keen for new japanese residents, and they were met with racist resistance. ten state governors voiced opposition, fearing the japanese would “never leave”, and demanded they be incarcerated if the states were forced to accept them. eventually, a civilian organization called the “war relocation authority” was set up to administer the plan, but milton eisenhower (from the department of agriculture) resigned his leadership in protest over what he characterized as incarcerating innocent civilians.

no one really cared back then, but we appreciate the sentiment. however, this led to a stricter, military-led incentive to incarcerate the japanese civilians, so you didn’t really win, mr. eisenhower.

army-directed evacuations followed, and people had six days notice to dispose of their belongings other than what they could carry. anyone who was at least 1/16th japanese was interned, including 17,000 children under 10, as well as several thousand elderly and handicapped.

these camps were located in remote areas, the buildings not meant for human habitation—they were reconfigured horse stalls or cow sheds. food shortages and poor sanitation conditions were common. each center was its own town, with schools, post offices, work facilities, and farms—all surrounded by barbed wire and guard towers.

in new mexico, internees were delivered by trains and marched two miles, at night, to reach the camp. anyone who tried to escape was promptly shot and killed, no matter their age.

when riots broke out over the insufficient rations and overcrowding, the police tear-gassed crowds and even killed a japanese-american citizen. three people were shot and killed for “going too close to the perimeter”.

in 1942, fred korematsu was arrested for refusing to relocate to an internment camp. his case made it all the way to the supreme court, where he argued that the executive order violated the fifth amendment. the supreme court ruled against him.

the camps were finally closed in 1945, after mitsuye endo fought her way to the supreme court once again. the government initially offered to free her, but endo refused—she wanted her case to address all of the internment camps. she was successful; the court eventually ruled that the the war relocation authority “has no authority to subject citizens who are concededly loyal to its leave procedure.”

the my lai massacre—march 16, 1968

during the vietnam war, US army soldiers entered a vietnamese hamlet on a search-and-destroy mission. they didn’t encounter any enemy troops; they did, however, proceed to set huts on fire, gang-rape the women, and murder around 500 unarmed civilians—including approximately 50 children under the age of four. army leadership had conspired to sweep this massacre under the carpet—the my lai massacre triggered a cover-up by the army that served to keep the atrocities committed a secret from the american public for 20 months during an election year.

american soldiers stabbed, clubbed, and carved “C [for Charlie] Company” into the chests of their victims (alive); herded them into ditches and blew them to bits with grenades. they cut off victims’ heads and slashed their throats.

this was more than spontaneous barbarism; for years, the army had dehumanized the vietnamese people as “gooks” and depicted women and children as potentially lethal combatants.

army officers who heard eyewitness reports of a massacre were quick to discount them. they issued a press release that informed news coverage—with lies. they claimed that their troops had killed 128 viet cong forces, even though they had been met with no resistance and suffered only one self-inflicted wound.

after word of the massacre reached the general public, more than a dozen military servicemen were eventually charged with crimes, but lieutenant william calley (the leader of the charlie company who was the main perpetrator in the massacre) was the only one who was ever convicted. pres. richard nixon reduced calley’s sentence to a light punishment—three years of house arrest.

three years of house arrest, and for only one person. for slaughtering 500 unarmed civilians. you do the math.

deportations

in 1975, more than 1.2 million refugees from southeast asia fled war and were resettled in the US—the largest resettlement for a refugee group in US history. in 1996, the illegal immigration reform and immigrant responsibility act (IIRIRA) expanded the definition of what types of crimes could result in detention & deportation—this broader definition could be applied retroactively, resulting in more than 16,000 southeast asian americans receiving orders of removal—78% of which were based on old criminal records.

islamophobia (article 2 preview) (article 3)

after the 9/11 attacks, islamophobia was especially prevalent in the western world, although it was also prevalent in other places without large muslim populations. from a small percentage of violence, an “efficient system of government prosecution and media coverage brings muslim-american terrorism suspects to national attention, creating the impression that muslim-american terrorism is more prevalent than it really is”, even though since 9/11, the muslim-american community helped security and law enforcement officials prevent nearly two of every five al qaeda terrorist plots threatening the united states. globally, many muslims report feeling not respected by those in the west, including over half of those who live in the US. in late 2009, the largest party in the swiss parliament put to referendum a ban on minaret (a tower typically built into or adjacent to mosques) construction, and nearly 60% of swiss voters and 22 out of 26 voting districts voted in favor of the ban—even though most swiss say that religious freedom is important for swiss identity. a network of misinformation experts actively promotes islamophobia in america. muslims are more likely than americans of any other major religious groups to have personally experienced racial or religious discrimination in the past year—48%, compared to 31% of mormons, 25% of atheist/agnostics, 21% of jews, 20% of catholics, and 18% of protestants. 1/3 (36%) of americans say that they have an unfavorable opinion about islam (gallup polls).

in the aftermath of 9/11, the US government has increasingly implemented special programs with hopes of “curbing and countering terrorism” and “enemy combatants.” these policies—such as the USA Patriot Act and the National Security Entry-Exit Registration System—have been targeted towards and disproportionately affects arabs, south asians, and muslims in america.

of course, the most lethal terrorist groups active in america are white supremacist groups, but people tend to overlook that because it’s always easier to blame something you have zero understanding of.

the non-profit advocacy organization South Asian Americans Leading Together (SAALT) cataloged 207 incidents of hate violence and xenophobic political rhetoric directed towards south asian, muslim, middle eastern, hindu, sikh, and arab communities between nov. 15, 2015, and nov. 16, 2016. approximately 95% of those instances were animated by anti-muslim sentiment. also, “approximately 1 in 5 of the documented xenophobic statements came from president-elect donald trump.”

that’s who america hired to run our country in 2016. this was way before his misdeeds in office, yet it took us so long—and such a hard fight—to oust him. did it really take that long for everyone to catch on?

police brutality—(christian hall) (angelo quinto) (tommy le)

“CHRISTIAN HALL was a 19-year-old chinese american teen who experienced a mental health emergency on december 30, 2020. pennsylvania state police were called and requested to help de-escalate the crisis. rather than providing aid or assistance, the troopers shot and killed christian. his hands were up in the air as he stood on the SR-33 southbound overpass to I-80, posing no threat to the armed officers.”

they shot him seven times, with his arms up in the air.

“I miss my son so much. I love him so much but if his death is the catalyst for change, then so be it. Let his name be remembered. His name is Christian Hall.” —Fe Hall, Christian’s mother.

a video, shot by his mother, shows ANGELO QUINTO, a 30-year-old Filipino immigrant, unresponsive on the floor after officers subdued him with a knee to the back of his neck. the video shows him bleeding form the mouth after police knelt on his neck when he was experiencing a mental health crisis in his family home. he died three days later in the hospital without waking up. the antioch police had no body camera footage, nor has the department named the officers involved.

“I was just hoping they could de-escalate the situation,” his sister said in an interview. she called 911 when her brother had been experiencing mental health problems and paranoia. she says that she remains conflicted about calling the police that night: “I don’t know if I will not feel bad. If it was the right thing to do they would not have killed my brother.”

“TOMMY LE, a 20-year-old Vietnamese-American student, died hours before he was scheduled to attend his high-school graduation in June 2017. He was shot multiple times by sheriff’s Deputy Cesar Molina after responding to reports of a man armed with a knife. Deputies discovered after the shooting that he was carrying an ink pen, not a knife.

The office reported that Le had lunged at the sheriff’s deputies with a knife and had been threatening residents, shouting he was “the creator.” An autopsy showed that two of the three bullets that struck Le were in his back, and a witness said that Le was shouting he was “Tommy the renter.”

despite the challenges our communities face, AAPI communities receive less than one percent of philanthropic funding.

covid-19

i’ll try to keep this brief. there have been so many instances of violence perpetrated against the asian community during covid-19—not to mention the casual snipes at our culture, the microaggressions we face every day, the verbal and sexual harassment we encounter, sometimes even on the way to the grocery store for a supply run.

VICHA RATANAPAKDEE: a thai-american, he became known as “grandpa” throughout his neighborhood, where he’d made it a ritual to go on morning walks each day. it was during one of those walks on january 28, 2021, when the 84-year-old was forcibly knocked onto the ground. he was transported to the hospital, where he died two days later.

“He never wake up again. He [was] bleeding on his brain,” his daughter said in an interview. “I called him, ‘Dad, wake up.’ I want him to stay alive and wake up and come and see me again, but he never wake up.”

between march and december last year, the organization Stop Asian American and Pacific Islander Hate recorded nearly 3,000 reports of anti-Asian hate incidents nationwide. the new york city police department also reported a 1,900% increase in anti-Asian hate crimes last year.

i think senator tammy duckworth put it very aptly.

“Most people, I don’t think, think of Asians as being the subject of racist attacks, but we have been. And we’re the one community that’s often always seen as the ‘other’. I—to this day—still get asked, ‘So where are you from really?’“

i don’t think i’ve ever related so much to something a senator said.

actor and activist daniel dae kim talked about an encounter he had with a pollster who said asian americans are “statistically insignificant” in polling models in a congressional hearing:

“Statistically insignificant. Now all of you listening to me here, by virtue of your own elections, are more familiar with the intricacies of polling than I am, so undoubtedly, you already know what this means—statistically insignificant literally means that we don’t matter.”

do we matter? are we really “statistically insignificant”? blips in the machine, to be used and then thrown away once we become too “fussy” or demanding?

testimonies from victims showcase the array of xenophobic and racist insults they’ve encountered. i’ll put an (x) next to the ones i’ve personally heard.

“Go back to Wuhan and take the virus with you.” (x)

“You are the reason for the coronavirus.” (x)

“Damn, another Asian riding with me. Hope you don’t have covid.”

*fake coughing* “Chinese b—” *more fake coughing* (x)

now for some really “creative” ones that i’ve personally encountered:

“Cock up my dad’s botton, Chinease cunt”

“You don’t got the kung-flu, do ya?”

“Ever ate a dog?”

Along the same vein, “ever had any bats? Heard they’re delicious.”

“Wouldn’t want ya to pet my dog. Ya might steal it and cook it for dinner!” *hyena laugh*

a little personal anecdote

i debated whether or not to wear a mask to school in early march. my aunt lives in china, and she’s a first-responder (trained paramedic & contact tracer) and we knew how bad the virus was going to be in late february when we facetimed her, quarantined in her apartment. her toddler was staying with her husband at her parents’ house because she was afraid of infecting them. she didn’t see them in person for four months, working 14-hour shifts in the back of an ambulance decked out in a hazmat suit.

my mom cried when she facetimed us the second week of her grueling shift. i couldn’t stop thinking about her when i went to school that day. my mom sent me another picture during art class, and i just couldn’t control myself. i started crying during class.

i asked my mom whether or not i should wear a mask to school, and she said that if i did, i would be singling myself out. i wouldn’t be protecting myself—far from it. if i wore a mask to school, people would think that i had the virus, not that i was trying to protect myself from it.

gossip spreads like wildfire, and the next day, everyone knew i had relatives in china. most of my friends were sympathetic, but they were wholly removed from the situation. it was early march, and they never believed that the coronavirus would spread here. they were firmly rooted in their opinion that it was an easy situation, grossly mishandled by the chinese government, and that we’d do much better if it ever washed up on our shores.

i do hate the chinese government, and back then, i didn’t think too much of their antagonism. yes, the situation was mishandled. it was like a repeat of the SARS outbreak in 2003—first a cover-up by the local government, then a cover-up by the national government, and finally, a realization that no, in fact, they could not handle it in secret. yes, the media had to get involved. no, dead bodies were not piling up in the hallways while they waited for doctors to triage care. yes, we have capacity! look at these documentary mini-videos, forcing doctors and patients to leave a wing of the hospital empty and operate below maximum capacity so they could shoot propaganda videos for the lunar new year, boasting about how well they’re handling it!

i won’t argue that in the beginning, this was mishandled. i will argue, however, against the idea that asian countries are incompetent. that western approaches are oh-so-much-better.

in wuhan, they built a makeshift hospital spanning three soccer fields in the span of a week, with properly-functioning utilities, hospital beds, decontamination, and security. people rallied together and donated everything from money and supplies to food and ventilators, from all across the country. doctors and medical staff shaved their heads so they could better wear masks and volunteered to go to wuhan, where the situation was much more dire than in other areas. thousands of medical students from shanghai were transported to wuhan to fill the personnel shortages.

china reopened in june.

what did we do?

we didn’t ask the asian countries for experience. china, japan, and korea had handled the 2003 SARS outbreak and knew what kinds of things needed to be done. from the beginning, they wore masks. they halted travel, they did routine testing, performed contact tracing, set up programs for bringing food to the immunocompromised, elderly, and disabled, and worked as a cohesive community.

on the other hand, we resorted to childish infighting, political games, shunning masks and blaming it on asians, when we could’ve learned from them instead. we didn’t do contact-tracing. our testing systems were sorely inadequate. borders were closed with china, yes, but the majority of the cases in the US arrived from italy and other european countries who had already been infected. banning travel between the US and china was nothing more than a political gimmick.

states fought each other for basic medical supplies. there was no national unity. we were fractured in two, and COVID became more fuel for the fire dividing the two parties, when it could’ve been something that unified us.

and instead of blaming china, we would’ve been better off recognizing our own failures.

you can say that the virus caught china by surprise.

it shouldn’t have done the same to us.

we knew it was coming. but we still botched it.

blaming the virus on asian communities is a sign of immaturity and a lack of accountability. own up to your failures.

anyways, my mom was right. whenever we wore a mask in public, people really did think that we were “dirty, foreign chinese.” we stocked up on groceries so we wouldn’t have to go out, because every time my mom did, people would look at her weirdly. they didn’t wear masks.

one time, she was accosted by a blonde woman when we were at a supermarket. i’d gone with her that time because it was right after practice, and i was in the car anyways. the lady came up to us (without a mask: this was in may) and said, “excuse me, you don’t have the virus, do you?” with a pointed look at my mom (who was masked up).

my mom, being the polite person she is, simply responded “no, i don’t.”

the woman didn’t let us go after that. she pushed even more. “well, you see, i was just making sure...with this chinese virus going around, it’s scary, you know?”

i wanted to ask her why she wasn’t wearing a mask if it was “so scary”, but i couldn’t get a word in before she asked another question.

“by the way, y’all aren’t chinese, right?”

yes i am. yes we are. why does it fucking matter. we’re wearing masks, you’re not, get the hell out of my face.

honestly, i don’t know how my mom does it. she has the patience of a saint. she said “mhm”, grabbed a gallon of milk, and walked to the self-checkout area. the lady looked at me and raised her eyebrow, and i said “so what if we are?”

she looked like she’d been slapped in the face. i turned and followed my mom, but she said “now hold on young lady!” i ignored her and kept walking.

i don’t owe her anything. why do people think it’s okay to talk to others like that? we’re human beings too. we’re allowed our basic dignity. basic respect. we’re not something for you to joke at, to laugh at, to fetishize or bully into submission. i don’t understand why it’s so hard for people to realize that. i don’t understand why it’s so hard for people to treat others like human beings.

to people like that lady in kroger:

why do you feel the need to do it? is your opinion of yourself really that high to think that you’re superior to others who are different from you? are you really that conceited to think that you’re the perfect image of a perfect human, and anyone not like you is unworthy, considered lesser? or is your opinion of yourself really that low, to think that whatever you say, it doesn’t really matter anyways? why do you find derogatory jokes and demeaning comments funny? why do you think it’s okay to harass a stranger just going about their day? is your life really that boring, and you have nothing else to do with your time? why? would it be okay if i came up to you and asked if you ate rotten shark meat, then laughed it off and said “oh, i thought you were from iceland”? is that okay? can i ask if you eat cockroaches? how would you respond if i asked “where are you from?”? you would say america, right? and if i asked again? europe? where in europe? oh, you don’t know? are you illegal? was your mother a prostitute? are you a communist? why are your eyes so big? do you speak europeanese? crut iveroij aeish poient. oh, those aren’t words? well i think they sound like european words. what’s your name? je-re-mi-ah? like jeeryyy-miiiaaaccchh? oh, that’s not right? sorry, my tongue just won’t bend that way. your names are so weird! why would your parents name you that? oh, it means something? well, i don’t know the language, so don’t expect me to say it right. have you ever eaten haggis? oh, that’s scottish? oh, you’re not scottish? sorry, you all look the same to me. scots and italians are just so similar, you know? what’s your name? your last name is anderson? i know an anderson! she lived in texas. are you related to her? oh, you don’t know her? sorry, i thought you were all related. yeah, like i said before, you all just look so much alike, you know? are you lazy? oh, nothing, i just heard from my dad that all french people are lazy. oh, you’re not french? well, you still look lazy. are you good at english? oh, nothing, i just assumed that all white people were english. i know you like to assume that we’re good at math. oh, you got an A in english? isn’t that normal? i can’t help it, you’re just smarter. you probably don’t even study. oh, you do? well, you’re smart anyways, so it doesn’t matter. you’re so good at math for an american! oh no, nothing, i just assumed that all americans were bad at math. *starts playing with her hair* oh, that’s making you uncomfortable? but your hair’s so silky, and it’s so smooth. what kind of hair products do you use? i want to learn how to make my hair look exotic like that. oh, you’re not exotic? but you’re foreign. of course you’re exotic. you know, *leans in and whispers* men like you this way, yeah? they just looveeee exotic ladies. *winks*

can you see how this is demeaning? can you see how this diminishes our culture, our hard work, our accomplishments?

racism isn’t funny. it’s not cool, it’s not a joke, and it’s hurtful. it makes us question our capabilities, forces us to have unrealistic expectations of ourselves, makes us feel unworthy and “other”. just stop? stop making hurtful comments. stop stepping on other people to feel better about yourselves.

#racism #anti-asian hate #anti-asian racism #asian #asian racism #politics #covid #covid-19 #i'm so sick of it

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lokigodofaces · 3 years

Text

list of variants/timelines i want to believe exist (and probably canonically do now)

this got long so i'm putting in a cut

a world where all of the events that happened in the Framework are real

bonus if the Framework world has their own version of the Framework that is like the real world in aos

Steve fell off the train, not Bucky. bc of the crap Zola did to Bucky, he survives in ice and well, and everything happens the same but Steve and Bucky's roles are reversed

Coulson doesn't bother to keep it a secret that he's alive, and the mcu is mainly just aos but with all the main characters as well (in other words, there's mainly good writing)

also in that world Steve and Bucky love Lola

Steve doesn't go back in time to live with Peggy

to all the people claiming aos isn't canon: Sylvie just made everything canon y'all. aos absolutely happened, and while i will argue that it happened in the main timeline, if you don't want to believe that it still happened in a timeline

Bucky didn't remember Steve soon enough, not until he killed Steve

Steve killed the Winter Soldier and didn't know who it was until he removed the mask

Hydra didn't hunt down Jiaying and by extent Daisy, so Daisy was raised by Jiaying and Cal who are not crazy bc they didn't have the same experiences they did in the main timeline

Thor never takes the others to Jotunheim, so Loki never learns he is Jotun

Fitz didn't survive almost drowning

Ward wasn't recruited by Garrett, but by literally any non-Hydra agent so he is a good guy

Coulson and May listened to the agent telling them to not send May in at Bahrain, heaven knows what happens there

the government gives the Avengers more than a week to go through the Accords, so they all get to the enhanced-people-have-to-wear-trackers, giant-underwater-prison, enhanced-operatives-can't-investigate-politicians, no-trial-for-enhanced, no-investigation-for-enhanced, etc sections so they all decide to not sign and just don't care what the government says

this is random, but i feel like Bucky as Ghost Rider would be a cool aesthetic.

the Avengers meet Robbie bc he keeps assassinating their targets bc they're targets of Ghost Rider's

Daisy dies instead of Lincoln

Daisy kills Lash before he can save her

Loki never "dies," so he is sent back to Asgardian prison after tdw

Radcliffe never reads the Darkhold, he just gave it to AIDA, so most of s4 doesn't happen

Dreykov comes after Natasha between Avengers and CACW, leading to the Avengers beating his *ss (like Yelena said, the god from space doesn't need an ibuprofen after a fight)

everything's the same but no Joss Whedon going on and on about Natasha not being able to have kids

whatever ship scenario you have is canon now

Loki gets all panicky after the Hulk beats him to a pulp, having now realized what he's done. Thor believes him, and this leads to Thanos being killed in 2012-13

Deadpool sits in the back of everything, shouting comments like "Yay! Superhero landing! But don't do that, it's bad for your knees!"

Peter Parker's parents never die

the Cavalry is an Avenger

Yondu brings Peter Quill to Ego, causing the universe's destruction

Gamora and Nebula get along their entire lives

Gamora and Nebula switch roles (Gamora becomes the cyborg, Nebula the guardian and Thanos's favorite daughter)

Heimdall actually bothers to look for Loki, seeing if they can find his body for a funeral, to find that he is being tortured by Thanos. Odin refuses to send anyone to save him, making Thor realize just how awful he is. Thor, Sif, and Warriors 3 go with the help of Heimdall to save Loki

Odin and Frigga are actually good parents, creating the most iconic trio ever

tw suicide for the next bullet point

Bucky commits suicide between TWS and CACW (Sebastian said in an interview once that Bucky was suicidal)

Loki keeps coming back as DB Cooper for fun or bc he keeps losing bets

the Eternals did interfere

the shrapnel kills Tony

this one thing i made about Mr Rogers adopting Loki

Robbie is part of the Avengers in 2012, but when he sees Loki he immediately says that Loki isn't the issue and goes off to fight Thanos single handedly (and wins)

for whatever reason Coulson and May do legally adopt all the Bus Kids

Hunter and Bobbi both go to break Fitz out of prison, and they stick around for the rest of the season

Fitz and Jemma never meet (saddest of sad days)

Loki for some reason is in FFH and he sees Mysterio's illusions and just laughs bc he's such an amateur

everything's the same, everyone's just obsessed with classical music and it's constantly playing so i get happy watching it

Asgardians are like the elves in LOTR (books, not the movies), so they're constantly singing and dancing and all

Loki is shown playing a Norse flute-like instrument (we know they exist, we've found them, they're different than your typical flute and we don't really know how they sound but i want Loki to be a flautist and no i'm not not projecting (note the double negative) and yes i headcanon Loki to be a flautist i don't care what anyone says)

everyone gets therapy

someone (Monica or Jimmy) hits Hayward on the head, knocking him out (the same way Gandalf knocked out Denethor in ROTK when Denethor told everyone to flee) and the rest of SWORD works with them because clearly Hayward has issues

Stephen commits to not texting and driving

somehow Luis becomes He Who Remains just for one timeline so the entire story is told like how he tells his flashbacks

Coulson doesn't help Fury and Carol escape

T'Challa does not survive and M'Baku becomes Black Panther

the suit in Iron Man 3 is not garbage the entire movie

Tony doesn't find a way to save himself in time

Ross dies in Incredible Hulk

Loki has a pet flerken he just always carries around

by the same logic, Bucky has a kitten he meets between TWS and CACW that he always carries around. said kitten attacks people when they attack Bucky

Bucky becomes Captain America instead of Sam

when Thor goes back to 2013 Asgard, he drags Loki with him back to 2023

Clint tests the time travel by going to Sokovia and drags Pietro back with him

Steve comes back an old man, but they use Bruce's attempt at time travel to turn him back into the 30 something Steve he was

literally anything happens other than Thanos killing Loki bc Loki only used knives when he isn't even tall enough to reach Thanos's neck

Sam and Bucky straight up kill Walker

Daisy never goes through terrigenesis

Loki somehow ends up a tutor for Daisy

Bucky joins the aos team after they find him on the run from Hydra

Bucky plays baritone saxophone bc bari saxes are awesome and it adds nothing to the plot but he spends at least half an hour in each movie playing bari sax

everything's the same but John Williams is the composer

S.H.I.E.L.D. uses GH-325 to revive a bunch of composers (Mozart, Dvorak, Beethoven, Bach, Bizet, Holst, y'know, all my guys) because they for whatever reason have their bodies because of some wack mission. and now they have a bunch of classical composers alive who insist on writing more music. and what are you going to do, tell Bach to stop composing?

by that same logic, someone working at the Guest House decides to steal Freddie Mercury's body so that they can revive him bc he just loves Queen that much

Thor realizes how awful Odin is and makes it his goal to get revenge for what Odin did to his little brother

Thor meets a bunch of Loki variants (most notably gator Loki) and just decides to stop questioning anything ever

Mobius teaches Loki how to ride a jet ski

Loki arrives at S.H.I.E.L.D. and informs everyone he wants to go to school and learn about politics and run for president and S.H.I.E.L.D. is like "okay whatever just don't tell anyone you're a literal god" but have no way to stop Loki from telling anyone

y'know the "shot heard 'round the world" thing from the Battle of Lexington (first battle in American revolution, if you don't know what it is, we have no clue who made the first shot & both sides were telling their troops to not fire. once that shot was fired the battle broke out)? yeah well that was Loki i'm pretty sure

Loki comes to Earth and becomes an Avenger and all but only ever introduces himself as DB Cooper. Thor doesn't ever come to Earth, so everyone just thinks DB Cooper found the secret to not age and just showed up to save people. he disappears for stretches of time & everyone stops being confused bc he was in hiding for decades of course no one's gonna find him (he is actually on Asgard)

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simpingforthisonedeer · 4 years

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who are your top ten black clover characters and ships? talk about them! -tat!

Tat? I just woke up and I don’t know who you are so please forgive me tat if I already know you but if I actually don’t, then nice to meetcha! Thank you for this interesting ask! I didn’t know people were interested in my thoughts or what I had to say sakjdhksj

I don’t have too many ships because Black Clover is mainly action so it is focused on that. I don’t ship any of the underage characters because they are all children who are busy saving the world and the adult characters such as the Captains(except Yami and Charlotte) and the Wizard King are all too busy with work and saving their kingdom and the world. They have no time for romance as of now. But, BC is going to be as long or even longer than One Piece according to Tabata so there is hope for everyone ;)

I’ve ordered this list from the bottom to the top so I hope you don’t mind 👹

10. William Vangeance

Look, if I was in the BC universe, what he did would be unforgivable to me. Instead of not enabling his most dearest friend to commit genocide, he leaves it up to him and the person he respects the most to fight to the death so he wouldn’t have to decide. Like who in their right minds would stand aside if their closest friend wanted to commit genocide for something that happened 500 years ago?

I was initially really upset with William but after a while, I started liking his character. Usually when people are like “I like this so-and-so character because they are flawed,” I would be like please🙄 but William is the first character I have ever truly liked for being flawed. Like this man loved Patri so much that he was willing to let people die. Not that it’s a good thing but you get what I mean. But at the same time, just as much he loved, he knew it was wrong so it was an impossible choice for him and I absolutely love that about him. But keep in mind, if he was an actual person I knew, my opinion would be waaaaaay different.

9. Zara Ideale

This man is badass as all hell like cmon. First commoner to become a magic knight??? That’s freaking amazing😎😎😎 and the way he kept a smile on his face despite everyone underestimating him and beating him down? Very respectable😎 The way he was an amazing, single father and a role model to Zora? That’s hot 😎 And the way he inspired my man Julius? Freaking iconic😎

8. Mereoleona Vermillion

She is simply a hot woman with a rough side, an OP character and an amazing leader. What more can I say 🙈🙈🙈

7. Finral Roulacase

I love his character because he is trying so hard to get better for Finnese’s sake. I mean he isn’t doing too good of a job but he is first gaining confidence in himself and I could clearly see a realistic difference in him. I personally don’t ship him with Finesse unless I see them bond more tbh but this is going to be a looooong story so there may be space for development there.

6. Grey x Gauche

Look, I don’t like Gauche because of his sister complex. It’s played off as a joke way too many times and I find it icky but the teased ship between him and Grey seems realistic and nice to me. Like he could help Grey build up her confidence and Grey could teach him what it is to love another person. Ships that build each other up make me go uwu asjkdhakjsd

5. Klaus Lunettes

I absolutely adore Klaus because this man is the prime example of hope for the next generation. He is a noble who was initially derisive of Asta and Yuno because they were peasants but now he actually loves and respects them. This is how the next generation should be. Nobles shouldn’t only learn to tolerate commoners and peasants but actually respect and even love them as well.

I especially like for his Klaus’s love and concern for Asta and find it incredibly wholesome and endearing. He is an amazing friend and actually voices his concerns if any of them are about to do something stupid unlike someone askjdaks

4. Charlotte Roselei

Charlotte is a badass woman and with the way she is written, just because she is in love, didn’t mean that she was any less than her position as Magic Knight Captain. What I mean is that she wasn’t reduced to a woman in love with Yami and actually has her moments where she gets to shine and im not going to spoil anything but she’s doing amazing in the manga and I’m cheering for her 😎

3. Fuegoleon Vermillion

Ok, I know I don’t talk about him as much but I really love his character because he inspires other people like Asta and Noelle and is a great magic knight captain. His character and the way he holds himself also reminds me of Erwin from AoT asdhakdkfsjk. Him and his fire magic and salamander are badass as hell and he also makes for an amazing leader. I genuinely like seeing him being all authoritative and it’s a nice contrast from Julius’ passive attitude. If Julius wasn’t Wizard King, it would be him.

2. Yami Sukehiro

Who in their right minds don’t like Yami Sukehiro? Like he is such a freaking dad to the rest of the squad and he has such amazing fight scenes and his spell, “Dimension Slash?” Freaking amazing like when he got trapped in the Dream World, I knew he was going to use that spell and it was so freaking cool. Not only that, he pushes everyone around him to be better and to surpass their limits. I like his constant presence and he makes for some really funny moments with his dry humor XD

1. Julius Novachrono

IM LITERALLY JULIUS NOVACHRONO BRAINROT AHGDKJSHDJKSFJKSH ITS IN MY NAME I SIMP FOR THIS MAN AND THIS MAN ONLY SO FREAKING MUCH AHSKAJSNJKA

Ok, so besides the fact that this man is HOT AS FUCK He’s also very sweet and when he nerds about magic it’s the most adorable thing in the world. In the beginning, I thought he may be a villain because he was too good to be true. But that was up until when he obliterated the Midnight Sun at their hideout I just went🥵🥵🥵 look I thought he was a passive character BUT GAH DAYUM the way he looked at patri like boi whatchu doin🤨 he was so bored during that fight like LAWD HAVE MERCY

I’m so sorry anon but you should’ve expected this from my hoe ass

I also love OP characters and I also happened to like time a lot. Like I am a massive Doctor Who fan and I’m a whole physics nerd and I’ve always been fascinated by Time, Gravity and Space among other things so of course I love Julius🥰🥰

I like how there are small details for his time spells like the fact that his Chronostasis spell only brings time to a near stop because completely stopping time would stop the movement of particles and instantly freeze and kill the person. AJSDJLKASJD I’ll stop nerding now(never👹)

Oh god, when I get to True Time Magic in my fic😩 light, time and gravity in the backdrop of magic got me shaking

He’s very charming and has good morals which is a big point in his favor but he’s also such a dad?? He takes Yami and William and basically raises them in their crucial years(teenage is pretty crucial right? I think so🤔) I don’t have daddy issues but GAH DAYUM HE FINE

I know he’s a kid and all that now but knowing Tabata, it’s because if he actually died, things would all go to shit real fast and I believe he would age up in some way or maybe actually grow up gradually and not die again(fingers crossed TvT) and actually contribute to the plot more😩 give me the grown up Julius, Tabata 👹👹👹

I mean if Tabata made the right decisions with his story, he would show Julius become less and less of a centrist in the name of character development and let him lose👀👀

#Black Clover #long post #Anshi's thoughts on tings #william vangeance #zara ideale #mereoleona vermillion #black clover mereoleona #finral roulacase #black clover grey #gauche adlai #klaus lunettes #charlotte roselei #fuegoleon vermillion #yami sukehiro #julius novachrono #tat!anon #thx for whispering 🥰

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xazz · 4 years

Photo

Moth Wings 5

Pairing: AltMal, Altair+Desmond Rating: Explicit Tags: vampires, romance, servant AU, music AU, fluff, angst, flangst Status: WIP

Double update bc it’s a spooky story for a spooky period of time :,)

Also now tumblr has access to the first full chapter of Moth Wings that Patreon has already enjoyed for a while now. If you wanna get ahead it’s all available on Patreon which you can find on my main blog.

The next day Altair only played the violin quietly. He didn’t want Malik to hear and Desmond liked the music. Malik didn’t bother him that day, or the next, thankfully.

His hand strength was increasing now. And he was starting to develop callouses on his fingers again. Thankfully. It made playing easier.

It didn’t get him any closer to getting Desmond to talk. When Desmond wanted music he mimed playing the violin. That wouldn’t do. He needed to get Desmond to start talking. He needed to show progress to the mistress and master. That he was doing right by them. That he wasn’t fucking up their son. Of course he also bitterly thought if they were really worried about the state of their son’s development they should be the one raising him!

Altair had taken to playing the lullaby each night now to Desmond. He sat on the bed with the violin as Desmond lay under the covers. He mimed playing. “No,” Altair said. “If you want me to play you ask, with words.” Desmond frowned. “I know you understand me, Des. If you want me to play you a lullaby you need to ask me.”

Desmond scowled at him and mimed again that he wanted Altair to play. “I’m not going to play unless you use words, Desmond.”

Desmond scowled and rolled onto his side, pouting. Altair didn’t leave yet. “Just ask me to play, and I’ll play all night if you want,” he stroked the boy’s hair gently.

Desmond sat up. His mouth worked and then in a very bad way went, “Altear plaw.”

Altair’s eyes widened. “Play? You want me to play?”

“Plaw,” Desmond said and mimed using the bow. “Plaw, plaw.”

“Okay. I’ll play,” and he tucked Desmond back into bed. “Thank you for using your words,” he said, holding onto the hem of the blanket. “Using our words gets things we want, see?”

“Yeas,” Desmond said. “Plaw.”

“I will. You’re such a good boy,” and he kissed Desmond on the forehead. Then he sat up and took up the violin and started to play the lullaby. Even just the few days his hands were more deft and sure than they had been the first time he played. He closed his eyes, enjoying the sound of the song washing over him, reminding him of being a child himself. In his bed Desmond yawned and Altair kept playing. He played it a few times and at the end of the last bar hung onto the last note, letting it fade slowly into the air around them and opened his eyes. Desmond was sound asleep, curled up under the covers.

Altair got up and put the violin away. He always took it back to his closet room with him every night. He liked having it near. It reminded him of his father. Of his life outside the castle.

He closed the door softly and when he turned around his heart was in his throat. Malik was leaning against the wall just next to the door. “Ah, sir, did you need anything?” Altair stammered stupidly, looking down at his chest and not his face but at least not looking at the ground.

He flinched when Malik put a finger under his chin, making him look up. “Just a bit higher,” he said nicely.

Altair swallowed, “Can I do something for you?”

“Yes,” Malik stood up properly and Altair really wished he’d just leave him alone. “Come with me.” Altair did follow and was glad Malik had turned away so he could avert his eyes. He didn’t lead Altair to his room but to another room. A bigger room. A ballroom perhaps? Altair had never been in here. A small couch had been brought into the middle of the ballroom. Malik went and sat on it and Altair was destined to stand before him. He started to get nervous, his hands trembling. “Play for me,” he said.

“What?” Altair choked.

“Play for me. I’ve heard you practicing. Let’s hear you now,” Malik reclined into the back of the couch.

“Ah- alright,” he put the violin case down and pulled the instrument out, retightening the loose bow. He swallowed and put the violin under his chin. He needed to think of something. He closed his eyes to try and think of some music. Anything. Something came after a few seconds, piercing through the panic. It was an up beat song but not very quick so he could keep up with the tempo. He used to play it a lot during festival days with other string players. It was a song for spring and reminded Altair of flittering butterflies.

The sound filled the ballroom, the high ceilings and marble floor creating perfect acoustics for the sound. It made it sound like there were five players in the room and not just Altair. He opened his eyes to look around the room he’d never been, his hands knowing the song well enough to not need his supervision. It was a high vaulted room with beautifully painted walls and a place to sit along the sides. And while spectacular wasn’t really of interest to Altair. The dining room was as magnificent and he saw that every day.

His eyes eventually rested on Malik sitting in the sofa and he was watching intently. It made him faulter and Altair lost tempo, his fingers scattering across the neck awkwardly. He blushed, looked away, and pulled himself together. He looked back at Malik and Malik was just enraptured by the playing. He wasn’t anywhere as good as he used to be but Malik didn’t know that. To him this was the height of how you played this instrument.

Finally the song ended and Altair lowered the bow. Malik clapped, smiling widely. “That was marvelous. Absolutely fantastic,” he said brightly.

“Thank you,” Altair said humbly.

“What’s your name?”

Altair wasn’t sure why he was surprised Malik didn’t know his name but he was. He supposed it would have appeared beneath him to ask the masters the name of their human nanny. “Altair,” he said, “Altair Luthier.”

“Such a name hardly belongs here in the mountains like this,” Malik said. “Is your family from here?”

“Yes, sir,” he nodded. “Five generations.”

“And before that?”

“I... I don’t know,” he admitted.

“You look different from the other humans in the town,” Malik remarked.

“Yes. My family and some others in the valley are darker skinned,” he admitted.

“Do you know who I am?”

“Apologies,” Altair bowed, “Your driver named you when you first arrived but I forgot most of it. I know you’re the master’s guest, Malik,” he apologized.

Malik chuckled. “It is a mouthful for you so far north, I don’t blame you for forgetting. I am a member of the Sunfaire coven far to the south. William and I are... well friend is such a strong word among our kind. He and I have an understanding. I am visiting for a time.”

Altair wasn’t sure why he was being told this. But the vampire wanted to converse with him. How odd. “Is there a reason? If he’s not your friend then why would you come here? Especially as it will be winter soon and the winters are frigid here.”

Malik smiled slightly. “Yes. I have heard. But there is unrest in my homeland. I disagree with the direction of my coven and how they are dealing with the unrest. So I took myself out of the picture until it is over.”

“Oh. How long will that be?”

“Who knows? A year? Five years? A generation? Humans have such a hard time letting go of their petty squabbles. Now play something else for me.”

“Alright,” Altair said slowly. He brought the violin back up, thought about what to play and decided to just do the lullaby with some flourish. The lullaby made him feel better as much as Desmond. But he added a bit more to it. A pitch change, a tempo shift, the rearrangement of some notes. The familiar song made him feel more at ease even with Malik watching him so closely.

Malik didn’t stop him and he just kept playing. Eventually leaving the lullaby melody for something else. Just something his fingers did without much thought. But he didn’t let it get sad like he had a few days ago. The music soothed him and even though he was the one playing it he felt himself being lulled to sleep by the music. He was also very tired. Playing with Desmond and practicing all day made him so tired. He hadn’t gotten a good night’s sleep in years it felt like.

A hand grabbed his wrist and he realized he was about to fall over. “Oh— uh—“ he felt very foolish at Malik holding his wrist. “Apologies. I uh— I almost nodded off there,” he flushed in embarrassment.

Malik didn’t scold him or even seem upset. “I suppose it is well past sunrise.” He delicately took the bow out of Altair’s hand, loosened it, and put it in the case. He took the violin as well and closed it in its soft lined case. Then he picked the case up but didn’t offer it to Altair. “I will carry it for you,” he said and motioned for Altair to go. He was mortified. A vampire? Carrying his violin?

“N-no, I can do it,” he tried to reach for it.

Malik just put a hand on his chest. “You’ve provided me with beautiful music tonight. It is the least I can do is carry a bit of weight before you go to bed.”

Altair didn’t know what to do and felt trapped. Eventually he just nodded and headed for his closet. Malik followed behind. “You play so well. Does the coven know you play?”

“I don’t think so,” Altair said.

“A pity,” Malik scoffed. “Or maybe for the better. I get to enjoy it all on my own without their racket,” he chuckled. “Well, of course, me and Desmond.”

Altair just laughed awkwardly. “I can take it now,” he said outside his door and held his hand out for the case.

“This is where you sleep?” Malik’s brow furrowed even as he surrendered the case. The door wasn’t like the other doors in the castle to everyone else’s rooms.

“Ah, yes. Thank you,” he bowed. He waited for Malik to leave but the vampire didn’t. “Uh?” he looked up and Malik was just standing there. “Aren’t you also going to go to sleep, Malik?”

“I’m a polite guest. It’s rude to leave before someone you walk home has gone inside,” Malik said. Altair looked at him, shrugged, and opened his door. He was surprised when Malik put his hand on the door before he could close it. “This is where you sleep?” Malik asked again, sharper this time.

“Ah? Yes?” Altair said, swallowing, trying not to cower.

Malik said something in another language, he sounded very annoyed. He looked down upon Altair’s little cot shoved into the corner and the tiny stool and water jug and basin. Then he looked at Altair. “No wonder you’re asleep on your feet.”

“I was very busy today,” Altair said.

“You’re sleeping on a board with a furred rug over it and no pillow,” Malik said it out loud and Altair looked down, humiliated. He didn’t like to think of it like that. “I don’t know how William and Kaley expect you to look after their son in a state like this.” He seemed genuinely angry about it. “In my coven we’d never allow the humans to stay in such a place. Oh I am having words with them,” he growled.

“No, please don’t,” Altair grabbed his arm. “The mistress already treats me so coldly, please don’t speak to her of this.”

Malik’s black eyes were narrowed. “You deserve better than this, even if you are a human,” Malik said. “Even the cattle are more well off.”

That rattled in Altair’s skull. “What?” he asked softly.

“Have you ever been to the cellar?”

“No. I’m not allowed down there,” Altair said just above a whisper.

“They have beds, and chairs, and places to sit comfortably in their confinement. Hell they even have space for things, personal items and entertainment. They haven’t even graced you with a shelf,” he motioned angrily to the closet. “What have they told you it was like down there?” Altair repeated the words the Matron had told him often. “Hah. Hardly. This coven hasn’t hunted fresh food in decades because they take good care of their livestock. They keep them well fed and fat. I’ve seen what you eat. Cold food you bring from the town. I’m sure they wonder why you even go there when they bring hot food up here every day to the outer cellar door for the humans. Mocking them like the food they bring isn’t good enough?

“No. I will certainly be speaking with William and Kaley of this because this is unacceptable. Even my servants have their own shared rooms thrice as big as this and only two people sleep in it,” he motioned to the room angrily again.

Altair was about to have a break down. He let go of Malik and was just sitting on his cot, staring at him. He’d suffered this place for three years, taking care of that horrible pulsating chrysalis and then their little son and they acted like a closet and providing him a small amount of money to buy his own food was a kindness. First he’d been forced to leave his home, his life, his livlihood, and now this came to light? He put a hand over his face and cried.

Malik stepped into the closet and knelt by him. “Altair?”

“Please sir, just go away,” he said thickly.

“Yes but-

“I wish to be alone. Please. Allow me that,” he looked at Malik with tearful eyes.

Malik looked stricken. He didn’t even react when Malik reached up to wipe away his tears. “I think you’ve been alone enough,” he said nicely. “And I don’t want to leave you here. You don’t deserve to sleep here another night.”

“Where else would I go?” Altair asked with a mad smile. “The garden? I’ll just sleep under the rose bushes huh?”

“Not quite what I had in mind, no,” Malik said. “But there is an extra bed in my chambers.”

“Wh-what? No. No I couldn’t,” Altair said quickly.

“I insist.”

“But-

“Altair,” he said with some impatience. “I know William has told you to obey any vampire in this castle, yes?” He nodded. “Well, I am one. So you will obey,” he said sternly.

“I don’t wish to intrude-

“Get up,” Malik stood. Altair hesitated but did stand. Malik pushed him out of the closet and stalked him down the hall back to the hall where his and Desmond’s quarters were. Altair wrung his hands the entire time nervously, nearly wringing the skin clean off. Malik opened the door and bullied him inside. “You can sleep here,” he said, showing Altair to the bedroom.

“W-what? No. I couldn’t. That’s your bed. I couldn’t push you out of that.”

“You can,” Malik said. “I have my slab,” he pointed to the sarcophagus in the corner of the room. “It’s really quite comfortable. You won’t be putting me out.”

“Yes but-

“Altair,” he spoke over his nervous prattling. “When was the last time you slept?”

“Last night,” Altair said dumbly.

“Really slept. Slept well? Got an honest to goodness real night sleep where you didn’t wake up as exhausted the night before? Hmm?”

Altair didn’t answer at first. But they both knew the answer. “Since I came here,” he said softly.

“I thought as much. Now please. You do a hard, thankless, task, you deserve a good’s night sleep. Now I am insisting you take my bed for the night.”

Altair still hesitated. But Malik didn’t seem a bad sort. And he seemed genuinely angry about the closet. He was being genuine. “Alright,” he finally said.

“Good,” and Malik put a hand on his shoulder. “I’m sorry your only interaction with vampires has been this coven,” he growled. “I assure you, we aren’t all like this. Most of us appreciate our human workers. This is why William and I have an understanding, but he is not my friend.”

“Oh. Thank you,” he bowed because he didn’t know what else to do. “You’ve been... very kind to me.”

“Only what you deserve,” Malik grunted. Then he released Altair and went to the sarcophagus. He removed his night coat and stretched out his arms and his glass-like strangely insectoid wings unfurled from his spine to also stretch out, straining to their full length. Altair had only ever seen Desmond’s tiny, useless wings. He’d never seen an adult vampire’s full wings. They were colored on the back like a moth or butterfly. Then they curled back up against Malik’s back and he climbed into the sarcophagus, closing the lid without another word.

That just left Altair in the bedroom of a vampire. He swallowed and took off some of his clothes. Just so he wasn’t sleeping fully dressed but more dressed than he’d usually sleep. Then he carefully sat on the bed, watching the sarcophagus like Malik would climb back out and call him a fool for believing such things and throw him out. But Malik didn’t. Altair inched his way further onto the bed and under the covers. They were the softest, most luxurious sheets he’d ever felt in his life. Even with the comforter he felt cool under them. And the pillows were great and plush, cradling his head gently.

Altair sank into the softness with a content sigh, eyes closing. He opened them enough to turn the lamp on the bedside table off before he closed his eyes. He slept better than he had in years.

#Assassin's Creed #AltMal #Altair #Malik al-Sayf #Desmond Miles #Moth Wings

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captainfangirlll · 5 years

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SHOW ARYA STARK VS BOOK ARYA STARK

Book Arya: She is frequently compared with Lyanna Stark, Ned said Arya in first book that she rides horses as a northern lady, like Lyanna used to do and that she looks like her and acts like her.

Show Arya: Lyanna and Arya resemblances is never mentioned but the actress who played Lyanna looks like Maisie a Lot

Show: Arya was in love with Gendry in S2-S3 (according to Maisie Williams) but they didn’t show us signs of this, just the scene when Gendry is shirtless in Harrenhal.

Book: We don’t know if Arya is in love with Gendry in books but she is confused about he feelings for him because she is too young to understand it, but we can read in books how she looks at Gendry in that way:

"She climbed to the roof and peeked down. Gendry was beating out a breastplate. When he worked, nothing existed for him but metal, bellows, fire. The hammer was like part of his arm. She watched the play of muscles in his chest and listened to the steel music he made. He’s strong, she thought.”

And she is jealous about Gendry:

Then maybe I’ll go find that black-haired girl and ring her bell for her.”

“But…”

“I said, go away. M’lady.”

Arya whirled and left him there. A stupid bullheaded bastard boy, that’s all he is. He could ring all the bells he wanted, it was nothing to her.

And later in another chapter he remember him about that:

"My father had honor," she said angrily. "And we weren’t talking to you anyway. Why don't you go back to Stoney Sept and ring that girl's stupid bells?"

Yep she thinked about that a lot apparently

She also thinks in a romantic way about Gendry. She said in a chapter think about Gendry like that is something Sansa would dream in her songs wich are romantic songs:

..she could ride with Gendry and be an outlaw, like Wenda the White Fawn in the songs. But that was just stupid, like something Sansa might dream

Show: Arya loves Jon Snow more than anyone but we can only see that in season 1, 5 (when she didn’t throw needle to the water) and little season 8

Book: Arya thinks in Jon every time, he is the one she looks for After her father’s death:

Jon wouldn’t care who I killed or whether I brushed my hair . . . “Jon looks like me, even though he’s bastard-born. He used to muss my hair and call me ‘little sister.’” Arya missed Jon most of all. Just saying his name made her sad.

She would have given anything if Jon had been here to call her “little sister” and muss her hair.

She yearned to see her mother again, and Robb and Bran and Rickon . . . but it was Jon Snow she thought of most. She wished somehow they could come to the Wall before Winterfell, so Jon might muss up her hair and call her “little sister.” She’d tell him, “I missed you,” and he’d say it too at the very same moment, the way they always used to say things together.

She even compare Gendry to him and that’s why she trust Gendry immediately

“NO!” Arya and Gendry both said, at the exact same instant. Hot Pie quailed a little. Arya gave Gendry a sideways look. He said it with me, like Jon used to do, back in Winterfell. She missed Jon Snow the most of all her brothers.

Show: Arya serves as a cupbearer to Tywin Lannister after he saves her and Gendry, wich is a great change actually in show.

Book: Boltons mens take Harrenhal from Lannister, Lord Roose Bolton arrives to take charge of the castle. Arya, now calls herself "Nymeria", or "Nan" for short, and is named Roose's cupbearer for her role in the freeing of the prisoners. She inadvertently meets Elmar Frey, the squire she would have to marry under Robb's agreement with the Freys, though they remain unknown to each other.

Show: The Brotherhood finds Arya, Gendry and Hotpie and their plan is let her immediately with her mother and brother.

Book: In books TB takes more time before takes Arya with her family, they even stop in hostals and brothels, and they make Arya wear a dress that’s why Gendry mess with Arya saying her she looks like propped girl and a lady.

Show: In tv show Melissandre captured Gendry first and then The Hound kidnnaped Arya.

Books: In books Arya have a little fight with Gendry and then she runs away from him in that moment The Hound captures Arya and the last thing she heard is Gendry screaming her name.

Show: Arya never saw Catelyn’s body after red wedding, only Robbs.

Book: Arya sees her mom and Robbs bodies after red wedding, but Catelyn’s no as her own, Arya is a warg in books like Brann and she wargs into Nymeria to take out of the river Catelyns body, then Beric Dondarrion finds Catelyn and resurrected her with a kiss.

Show: In books Arya meets Brienne of Tarth and she have a fight with The Hound for Arya.

Books: Arya never meets Brienne in books.

Show: Arya reunites with Jaquen in the House of black and white

Book: Arya never see Jaqen again, she trains with other faceless man in braavos known as Kindly Man and the Waif, who accept her in.

Show: Arya kills Ser Meryn Trant in braavos, she also pass herself as an oyster saleswoman and trains hard with the waif.

Book: Arya learns to lie from the waif, she also pass her self as “Cat of the canals” a street urchin, to learn secrets and report them to the kindly man. She also begins learning the art of lying from the waif. During this time, she kills a deserter from the Night's Watch named Dareon, and she briefly meets Samwell Tarly, a friend of her half brother Jon Snow, though they do not introduce themselves to each other. After these incidents, she accepts milk meant for "Arya". When she wakes the next morning, she is blind.

Show: Arya gets blind and stay in the street as a homeless girl, she also trains with the waif and is repeatedly abbused and punched by her, she receives her sigth again after she drinks waters from the water well Jaqen gives her.

Book: Arya remains blind and in the service of the House of Black and White in Braavos. The blindness is induced by the milk she drinks every night. She continues to dream through the eyes of her direwolf, Nymeria, but speaks of it to no one. She still struggles with leaving her identity as Arya Stark behind. While she is blind, Arya wears the guise of "Beth", a beggar girl. She wanders the streets of Braavos, begging for money and listening for bits and pieces of information. She becomes better at lying and detecting the lies of others.

Arya receives her sight again after she is able to identify the kindly man and hit him with a stick when he sneaks up on her. It is implied, however, that she does not simply sense his presence (as he assumes) but sees him through the eyes of a cat hiding in the rafters.

Show: We don’t know what Arya does in her freetime in braavos we only see her training and training.

Books: In books we can know more about Arya, she pass her time warging cats also with the company of braavos courtesans the most seductive woman in Essos, so Arya learns a lot from them, the last chapter we read about her she seduced a man so we start to see Arya’s grow.

Show: Sansa is the one who marries Ramsay Bolton.

Books: In books is Jeyne Poole the one who marriea Ramsay, but they said all the north the girl is Arya Stark, that’s why Jon is murdered in booka because he break his votes to rescue “Arya”.

Arya is gonna comeback to Westeros like in the books, the last we know from her is that she killed a man who was not ordered by the god of death so is possible we would see same as the show, the waif trying to kill her, she kills the waif and come back to Westeros.

Arya is very different in books than show, I think we are gonna see an Arya really different than the girl she used to be but not as cold as the show, Arya in books is still a social girl, she also learns a lot with braavos people and talks braavosi.

Theories:

She is gonna meet again Lady Stonehert because she is the one who help in her resurrection, I think at first she is gonna team up with her to kill the freys and also meet Gendry again (bc he is with LS) but then she will have to kill her, because she’s gonna realize she is cruel and only live for revenge (that’s gonna help in her arc about revenge and how bad it is) so she’s gonna save her mom from that misery.

Shes gonna go to north with the brotherhood and Gendry to look for Jon, after she heard “Arya Stark married Ramsay Bolton”

And I don’t know guys the history in books is so different idk what’s gonna happen, im very sure we are gonna see a romance between Arya and Gendry, a reunion with Lady Stoneheart and she fighting in the long night, I don’t think she kills the Knight King theres also no NK in books, so we are all Jon Snow, we don’t know nothing.

#game of thrones #arya stark #gendrya #gendry baratheon #got #maisie williams #jon snow #joe dempsie #gendry #lady stoneheart #catelyn stark #ramsay bolton #asoiaf #sansa stark #brienne of tarth #sandor clegane #the hound

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mainly-kpop · 5 years

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You’re Invited

Word count: 6,759 Warnings: bloodsuckers, smut, small anxiety attack? Talks of killing, Yoongi is slightly stalkerish... summary: A small halloween party to cure your boredom... what could go wrong? Vampires, that’s what could go wrong.

Ft, my sketchy drawing bc i had a vision god damn it! also, happy halloween ;)

p.s Ofc, as always, my ask box is open come talk to me or request stuff, i love to hear from yall <3

Vampires, you scoffed, who actually believed in that shit now? After twilight plummeted in sales, and that generation grew up, wasn’t it a thing no one talked about? Sparkling vampires and lightning baseball matches, it was all heavily fiction, vampires. as if.

Sighing you turned the television off, sinking into the odd brown plush cushions of the couch. Staring up at the ceiling, making random noises with your mouth, and tapping your fingers on the couch. GOD, why were you so bored? It’s not like you had nothing to do. Honestly you had plenty you should be doing. Maybe work for a start? or the house needed a damn good clean. You could call your mother, see if she wanted to have lunch tomorrow. Instead, you eyeballed the Halloween invite to your left, the black and orange piece of paper making you grimace. How tacky and childish, who celebrates Halloween at this age? Were you just boring? Behind on things people actually took interest in now? Swearing under your breath, you grabbed the invitation reading it over.

NEIGHBOUR!

I wish to invite you to our super spoopy Halloween party! I will be heavily disappointed if you don’t dress up, but if you give me a shot of something wicked, I’ll let it pass...

Hope to see you here!

Taehyung.

You knew of the boy, he lived with his friends. It seemed like some weird frat house, but some of them were far too old to be in a frat... Who were you to judge though. Puffing air loudly through parted lips, you trudged to your room to find something to wear. Eyeballing the Halloween outfit from three years ago, you shrugged.

‘Let’s hope this fucking fits...’ you spoke to yourself, squeezing into the sexy Alice in Wonderland costume. It was snug, but it still looked half decent. Grabbing the invite off the kitchen counter, you headed out to the party.

He didn’t leave an address, but the people screaming, the heavy base and the cars leading to the scene usually pointed out where to go. Shuffling past already drunk people on the doorstep, you slipped through the door. A boy pounced at you the second you stepped in, as if he had been waiting for your appearance.

‘I’m so glad you made it!! And you dressed up how cute!’ You tilted her head, frown etched onto your features. Cute wasn’t really what you were going for, but go off chief. You smiled awkwardly at the boy dressed as a vampire.

‘Yep.’ An awkward reply if he ever heard one, but he shrugged it off quickly. He grabbed your arm dragging you to the kitchen, placing a strange concoction in your hand. Looking into the cup, you shrugged, taking a gulp. If anything, at least it would cure your boredom.

‘Is she here?’ Jungkook spoke, interest piquing as Taehyung re-joined the group. Yoongi rolled his eyes, smacking the other on his muscular arm.

‘Of course she’s here you idiot, can’t you smell her?’ He questioned, a little sceptical about the talents of the younger boy. True he was newer than the rest of them, it was going to take some time for his skills to warm up, but he should smell you. The younger just shrugged, taking a sip of the drink in his hand.

‘Also, why did we all have to dress like vampires. It’s fucking lame.’ Yoongi sulked, taking the fake fangs out of his mouth, throwing them onto the table in front of him.

‘It’s funny, hyung! It’s dramatic irony!’ Taehyung moaned, Yoongi just rolled his eyes standing up.

‘Dramatic irony my ass, it hurts my non beating heart. Why couldn’t we be zombies, now THAT would have been funny.’ Jimin giggled at the elder boys outburst, thinking about them dressed as zombies. Honestly dressing up for this season annoyed him in general. They only ever play along because Taehyung and Jin love it so much.

You wandered about the party, eyeballing everyone dressed up. Was there a vampire theme tonight or? Did you miss the memo? You looked at the little paper invite in your hand, scanning it for any mention of vampires. Seeing nothing, you shrug, placing it down on an end table and walking away. Maybe vampires were still a big classic for people, huh, who knew! Downing the liquid in your cup, you grimaced. Whatever that boy gave you was not normal.

‘Did you just down that in one? You’re supposed to sip it!’ He looked astounded to say the least, the tall vampire with big doe eyes.

‘Pfft, who sips alcohol. What do you think I am? A child?’ You sassed, looking him up and down, he was hella attractive, all these ‘frat boys’ seemed to be.

‘No I’m serious, that’s enough alcohol for like 5 or 6 rounds. You’ve just downed 6 rounds in one glass...’ You just laughed at him. Although, your head did feel fuzzy, maybe he was right.

‘Ah, who cares, you think, you think I can’t handle alcohol?! I’m big girl! I can do it all little man!’ Jungkook groaned, god he hated humans at these stupid parties... You clung onto his arm, hiccupping.

‘Hey! Where are you taking me?’ You gasped, he stopped to look down at Your fragile frame. You stood on your tip-toes to whisper in his ear. ‘Are we going to a bedroom? No offence but you’re a little young for me...’ He scoffed, now THAT was genuinely hilarious.

‘Listen peach, I’m one hundred percent sure, I’m older than you. And no, we aren’t going to a bedroom.’ He groaned, lugging your dead weight around.

‘Yoongi, help me please.’ He grumbled, practically throwing your drunken body onto his friends lap. Yoongi looked you up and down, smirking at your cute little costume. Your hair in little pigtails, dried fake blood on the dress. He could tell you didn’t make much of an effort for this, that you really could have done without being here in the first place.

‘Hello, you have pretty eyes.’ You hiccupped, poking lightly at his cheeks. He laughed at you, his fangs sitting between his lips.

‘Hey, those look so real!’ You marveled, before he could stop you, you pushed your pointer finger to the bottom of his fang, splitting your skin. You pulled back instantly, sucking the finger into your mouth, whimpering at the shock. ‘Ouchie.’ You cried out, not noticing the eyes on you.

‘Hey, little boy, stop looking at me like that!’ You grumble, pointing your other hand at him. Jungkook snaps out of his trance instantly, sighing at you.

‘I’m not a little boy you child! I’m AT LEAST 60 years older than your stupid ass!’ He complained, making you burst out laughing. He tensed at the sound, hands clenched into annoyed fists by his sides.

‘If you’re 60 years older than me, then you’re using really good face creams. This kid doesn’t even know how old he is!’ You marvel, whispering to Yoongi before getting distracted by the fangs again. he focused on putting them away before you could endanger yourself again. You seemed like the type to try again regardless of getting hurt. He wrapped an arm around your waist, trying to sit you up on the couch, rather than having your weight lounged across him.

‘You’re like really pretty…’ You whispered, the boys around you laughed, trying to fall into their own conversations, or find their own women to deal with tonight. Yoongi always wanted you, you didn’t know him, but by god did he want you. You smelt so sweet, looked so tempting. Yoongi basically knew your whole schedule at this point, knew when you went for a jog or went out to work. Knew where you shopped for your groceries, and your favourite song. Most of these things he found out by chance, and saying it out loud seemed creepy. He was shopping the same day you were, he found that day and that place was usual for you. You jogged past their house on the regular, Yoongi naturally woke up one morning to close the blinds that incessantly plunged light into his room. Despite popular belief, he could go into the light, he just rather wouldn’t. It burnt his eyes, he hated sunlight when he was alive, he was not shocked to see it hadn't changed in death. Every morning after that he stood at the window, happy to see it wasn’t just luck when he saw you the first time. One time you looked up, saw him at the window, he closed the curtains quickly though, not really wanting to see your reaction. You might have thought he was a creep, or a stalker, either way you had frowned at the window, carrying on running. The song thing was purely by chance, he walked past your home a lot at night, his ridiculously good hearing made him hear things he didn’t want to from people’s houses. Every second house, someone was fucking. He once heard your elderly neighbours screaming daddy, that really scared him. He still couldn’t look Mr and Mrs Williams in the eye. Despite that, walking past yours was his favourite, it was always the same pop song blasting through your speakers, he could hear the neighbours ranting about it but he would just laugh. He found himself singing it regularly, not able to place it until he heard it from you again. That’s when he knew he was screwed. I mean enjoying a person is one thing, but he basically knew things about you he shouldn’t, he felt more like a stalker every day, it was getting dangerous.

The others could see it too, but it wasn’t something they could really help with, maybe he just needed to fuck you to get you out of his system, that was the plan of course. The second you got that invitation, it wasn’t a coincidence. It was meant to drop through your letterbox, bright and colourful to catch your eye. Taehyung had remembered humans were tempted by bright things. Jin had insisted on glitter too, mentioning shiny objects, Yoongi just rolled his eyes, promising you weren’t that kind of person. Now here you sat, basically on his lap, drunk as Jungkook used to get before he was turned. ‘White girl wasted’ if you will.

‘You said that already angel.’ He laughed, trying still to sit you up. You wrapped your arms around his neck, falling more into him. His hands flew into the air, not actually sure what to do. I mean, yeah, he had a taste of you, you tasted better than he could ever imagine, but you were drunk. He could practically taste the alcohol in your blood. He wanted you, but he wasn’t a monster, despite, well, being a monster. He wasn’t going to take advantage of you, not tonight, not in the foreseeable future.

‘No, I said you had pretty eyes. Stupid boys, you never listen!’ You sighed, throwing yourself backwards, luckily no one was sitting behind you. You lounged over him and the couch, the only problem being your VERY short dress. Yoongi’s eyes popped out his skull, picking you back up into a sitting position. He wrapped a blanket around your legs, slinging you over his shoulder. You frowned, thumping on his back. To him it felt like a strange type of massage, to you it was clearly meant to hurt him. The thing that annoyed you most, even in your drunken state, was the fact he had the NERVE to laugh.

‘Hey, pretty boy! Put me DOWN!’ You squealed, being carried to a quiet room. He threw you down on the bed. Walking to the dresser, he rummaged through drawers.

‘Listen buddy, if you’re trynna smash right now I ain’t down.’ You protest, trying to get up off the bed, before you can even register it, he’s by your side. Wait, wasn’t he on the other side of the room?

‘I ain’t trying to smash you, idiot. Here put these on.’ He speaks, handing you some clothes. You were staring at the items in your hands, quirking an eyebrow at him.

‘What? Do you not like my outfit? The tea boy said I looked cute!’ You pout, crossing your arms over your chest. This would be endearing if your tits weren’t already falling out the dress. He groaned, frustrated in so many different ways.

‘Please, angel, just put the clothes on.’ He whined, you frowned, poking his chest with your finger. He looked mildly confused before smirking at you.

‘My name is not angel pretty boy, it’s Y/N.’ You grumble, grabbing your hand to pull you to your feet, he stood chest to chest with you. Your breath hitched in your throat, if he told you right now, to get on your knees you would. Fuck being drunk, fuck saying you didn’t want it, you did. Fuck you really did.

‘My name isn’t pretty boy Y/N, it’s Yoongi.’ He whispered, testing your name and his name together on his tongue. His fingers slipped to the zip of your dress, pulling it down painfully slowly. His lips met your ear, grazing across the lobe as he spoke. ‘But you can call me whatever the fuck you want.’ He whispered, watching the goosebumps appear on your skin, listening to your heart rate skyrocket. He tried to control himself, pulling away from your body watching the dress fall to the floor. You didn’t try to cover up, too busy trying to figure out what his next move was. Gently he grabbed the clothes out of your hands, slipping the shirt over your head, covering your exposed breasts.

‘Are you really not going to try something?’ You whisper, puppy eyes staring up at him. He smiled down at you, letting the boxers he picked out for you fall beside your dress, pooled around your ankles.

‘As much as I would love to ravish you darling, you’re drunk.’ he smiled, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear, softly holding your cheeks. You pushed your forehead against his, closing your eyes.

‘What if I want it?’ You whispered, chest heaving, despite being drunk this was taking a lot of confidence. He could hear your heart thrumming in your chest, the blood pumping through your veins. You were turned on, you wanted this. He had control, little to none, but some. He was mustering all the control now, to continue turning you down, but the more you begged, the more he wanted to give in.

`If you keep teasing me like that, I won't go easy on you when you wake up.’ He growled, forcing you to look at him. However, your faces were close, him pushing your face up like this had your lips ghosting on his. Both your eyes widening in shock, he relaxed quicker than you did, slamming his lips on yours. He needed a taste, one little taste to sedate himself, to tide himself over. He pushed you down to the bed, the kiss quickly heating up. You nibbled his lips, moaning into his mouth.

‘We need to stop.’ He groaned, practically ripping himself away from you. You whimper at the loss of him, making grabby hands.

‘If you won’t have sex with me, can you at least cuddle with me?’ You whine, climbing under the sheets, pouting dramatically. He laughed at you, nodding in agreeance. He changed out of the awful halloween costume, settling for just his boxers. It was a warm night, he didn’t need much more.

Waking up the next morning, your head pounded. You let out a loud groan, burying your face into the pillow below you. You didn’t recognise the scent filling your nose, realising you must have gone home with someone. Real smart girl. You chaste yourself, wondering what you even had to drink. Only remembering drinking one drink, you frown. Drugs? A light snore came from beside you, making you shoot your head over, if he drugged you, he was about to get a fucking earful. He roofied the wrong bitch.

‘HEY YOU!’ You screamed, smacking a hard slap down on his chest. He coughed and spluttered, doubling over in pain.

‘WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT FOR?!’ He screamed through coughs, trying to get the air back into his lungs. You sat upright in his bed, arms crossed scowling at him.

‘Did you drug me?!’ You shout at him, ready to kill him. Ready to hurt, maim and kill the man in front of you. He looked confused, squinting at you trying to figure out what the FUCK you were talking about.

‘Somehow, I drink one drink, remember nothing and now I’m in your bed, with nothing but my panties and YOUR SHIRT. Did you drug me?’ He couldn’t help but laugh, couldn’t help but be weirdly amused by you. Glaring at him harder, you punched his arm full force. You may look like a prissy little girl, but you worked out god damn it, you were tough!

‘CAN YOU STOP HITTING ME?!’

‘IF YOU STOP LAUGHING AND ANSWER MY FUCKING QUESTIONS YEAH I MIGHT.’ You yell back, he huffed, sitting up to face you.

‘Hi, my name is Yoongi, and no I didn’t drug you. The punch we make for these parties isn’t well, it isn’t for your kind. It’s strong. You, being an idiot, drank it like a fucking shot. Impressive that you didn’t vomit though…’ He explains, but there was only one thing you picked up on.

‘What do you mean my kind? You being sexist? Because I’m female I can’t handle alcohol? Listen “Yoongi” I bet I could drink your little ass under the table.’ You sass, Yoongi rolled his eyes. Before you knew it, you were pinned to the wall across the room, hands beside your head, Yoongi’s face inches away from yours.

‘I meant human darling. Not fucking female.’ He growled, fangs sticking through, making him unable to close his mouth. Fear rushed through your body, kicking your fight or flight reflexes into action. You did both, kicking him as hard as you could in his crotch, running as fast as you could. Realistically, at the speed he threw you into the wall he could catch up with you in seconds, kill you in a heartbeat. Regardless, you made it to your home, safe and sound. Yoongi stood in his bedroom, slamming his head off the wall repeating ‘Stupid!’ Like a mantra.

‘I know you are but can you keep it down?’ Came a sarky voice from the door. Yoongi turned with eyes glazed over in anger. The boy cowered, running down the hall.

‘Jungkook!’ He screamed after him, gaining the boys attention. He turned slowly, waiting to hear what the older boy wanted.

‘Call a house meeting.’ He requested quickly. five minutes later all the boys were gathered in the living room, watching Yoongi pace the floor. Namjoon bit his lip nervously, not really sure what he was sitting here for.

‘Yoongi, why are we here?’ He sighed, leaning back on the couch. He let his eyes filter around the room, the aftermath of the Halloween party staring him in the face. The mess was a kick in the gut, but not as bad as the next few words to tumble out of Yoongi’s mouth.

‘She knows. She knows what I am.’ He spoke clearly, not fumbling over his words for a second. He looked at all of their faces one at a time, each displaying variations of fear and anger.

‘What do you mean, she knows. What the fuck did you do Yoongi?!’ Jin yelled, slamming his hand on the table. Yoongi told them an account of the night, letting the information sink in. There was a long silence, longer than he could bare. No one spoke for what seemed like a lifetime, and he would know.

‘She has to die.’ Namjoon spoke, saying what everyone was thinking. Despite it being on everyone’s mind, even his own, they still protested.

‘Namjoon that’s too fair.’ Hoseok spoke, sorrow in his eyes for his friend.

‘We can’t just kill her.’ Jimin pouted, actually kind of enjoying having a pretty face in the neighbourhood.

‘You can’t just say things like that.’ Jungkook spoke, despite how you treated him last night, he knew you didn’t deserve to die.

‘It’s Yoongi’s mistake, he needs to fix it.’ Namjoon spoke plainly, standing up from the couch. He placed a comforting hand on his shoulder, smiling sadly at him. It’s not like Namjoon wanted to be the one to say it, but they all seemed to look up to him, maybe because he’s been “dead” the longest. Either way, he became a leader, he wasn’t about to let them all die for one girl. They all had to do it at some point, all had to kill someone who found out, this was nothing new, so why was Yoongi so devastated at the outcome?

You stood in your home, pacing the floor, the nails you had prided yourself on, now bitten down to stubs. Four years of growing, four years of no biting and now here you are, down to the skin. The floor you paced on was probably worn now, the squeaks of the floorboards definitely seemed louder. You should call a friend, or a co-worker, stay somewhere else until he’s forgotten you. He can’t kill you if you’ve disappeared right? You had a feeling that wasn’t his intention, you were drunk, black out drunk. He could have killed you, but he didn’t. Why? You knew he didn’t want you dead, but that didn’t stop your overactive mind thinking of different scenarios of your early demise. Fuck, you know you shouldn’t have gone to that stupid fucking party. Looking around for your phone, you couldn’t find it. Searching high and low, your entire house, nowhere in sight. You scream into the fucking void because OF COURSE IT’S AT HIS HOUSE. There was no way in hell you were going back for it. Nope, not a chance, no fucking way.

‘Y/N?’ He muttered in disbelief, staring at you, hand still in the air from going to knock on the door. It swung open before you had a second to even knock. For a second you debated running, but again, it opened before you could even move your feet. Why were you here? You could just buy a new fucking phone, forget it ever happened, who needs it? Not you.

‘This was a mistake, I have to go.’ You spoke, stepping backwards, keeping your eyes on him, you did not trust him, not one bit. Your foot landed on a bottle, making you lose your balance, maybe walking backwards wasn’t a good idea? Who fucking knew.

Before you could hit the floor, arms wrapped around you, pulling you upward. You didn’t have a second to protest before you were in the house, door closed behind you.

‘Why are you here?’ He questioned, concern and confusion lacing his voice. Clearly you were crazy or just plain stupid for coming back.

‘I left my phone, I wanted it back but I can just buy a new one.’ You rushed out, trying to get to the door, the more you tried, the more his body crowded around yours. He trapped you against the wall, unable to flee like your instincts needed you to.

‘Please, hear me out.’ He begs, not even above a whisper.

‘Hear you out about what? It was a normal party, I got too drunk, you took care of me I left that morning. Nothing strange, nothing out of the ordinary, just people dressed as-’ You stop, the word “vampire” on the tip of your tongue. The thought made your blood run cold, the hair on your arms standing on end. Yoongi sighed, bowing his head in disappointment.

‘Don’t tell anyone, please. No one is going to hurt you, just please don’t tell anyone.’ He begged, at this your face softened. Seeing someone so powerful, so fast, so strong beg and plead was sort of strange. You tilted your head at him, furrowing your eyebrows until you caught the face peeking around the corner. His eyes narrowed in on you, glaring at you.

‘You might not hurt me, but the little CHILD back there might!’ You growled, suddenly having a lot of confidence for someone standing in a fucking vampire cave. The boy scoffed, stepping out from behind the wall.

‘I’m not a CHILD, how many damn times do I have to tell you?’ He sarked back, hands on his hips, you snorted at the baby faced man in front of you, pushing Yoongi to the side. Man this kid was getting on your nerves.

‘You’re a child, you literally look fifteen, fight me baby boy.’ You smirked, assuming he wouldn’t do anything. In that second your back was pressed against the wall again, his face so close his heavy breaths hitting your face.

‘I’m a vampire too baby, so call me baby boy one more time.’ He growled, Yoongi just glared at him, crossing his arms with a sigh. He knew the youngest wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, he would fucking kill him if he did. You had lost the bite of your tongue, trying to think of something to say. His face was too close, his breath smelt too sweet, his cologne too strong. Every sense you had was clouded, by him. ‘What? Nothing to say baby girl?’ He teased, trailing his fangs over your neck. To your surprise, you didn’t flinch nor did your mind go blank. You let him carry on trying to scare you. When he pulled back, gazing into your eyes, you rolled yours.

‘Are you done? I just came back for my phone.’ You replied lazily, trying to seem brave, you were sure he could hear your heartbeat. The way he looked down to your chest solidified the idea in your mind.

‘You got a brave one here Yoongi, how tempting…’ He spoke to the man beside you, eyes still trained on you. Within a second he was gone, your body collapsing to the floor. Yoongi rushed to your side instantly, checking you over. Nothing was wrong, your legs must have just given out at the shock.

‘I won’t tell anyone, can I just leave.’ You whimper, trying to hold back the tears. You weren’t scared of him weirdly enough, but Jungkook sent a chill through your spine. You were sure he was a nice kid, and you were sure everyone else was just as sweet. Stepping even onto the property today, all you sensed was hostility and anger, that wasn’t a friendly vibe nor one you wanted to be entangled with. Yoongi sighed again, helping you off the floor, leading you to the stairs.

‘Where are we going?’ You panicked, stopping dead in your tracks. he soothingly rubbed your back, making you look at him.

‘Your phone is in my room, I can leave you here if you want, but I don’t think you want to meet the others right now.’ He guessed. He was correct, you forced your legs to walk again, following him up to the room. He couldn’t help but smile, you were still wearing his shirt. Granted, you probably didn’t think changing was important, you were probably just as stressed and scared as him. He sat down on his bed, handing you the small device that was left on his bedside table. You grabbed it out his hand, awkwardly standing in the middle of the room. Quickly you are reminded of being thrown out of the bed, pressed to the wall, then you kicking him in the balls… You wince at the thought, letting a little snort slip out. He looked up quickly to you, seeing the smile on your face. He quirked an eyebrow, silently asking what was so funny, especially in this situation. He was one loose lip confession away from endangering the whole group, and you were one confession away from dead.

‘I’m sorry for kicking you in the balls earlier, wait. Do you still have balls? Okay, I mean, you have balls, but do you still FEEL it you know?’ You question, blabbering out the words. You really needed to get this whole word vomit thing under control. He looked at you for a second before laughing, almost clutching his stomach at the speed it ripped through him.

‘Yes, I can still feel my balls. Also, it hurt like a bitch, where did you learn to kick like that?’ He winced, recalling the memory of this morning, him smashing his head on the wall over and over again.

‘I take lessons at the gym, got to learn to defend myself you know? Don’t know who or what is out there.’ You joke, watching him roll his eyes.

‘What now you can make jokes?’ He teased, getting up from the bed to walk towards you. You shrug your shoulders in response.

‘Well, now I know I can hurt you, it gives me a bit of confidence.’ You reply, stepping back a pace.

‘I’m still faster than you angel, still smarter, stronger.’ You roll your eyes, back against the wall again.

‘I get that, also my name isn’t angel, it’s-’

‘Y/N, I know you told me last night.’ He teased cockily, putting his hands on either side of your head. Trapping you again, why do you let yourself into these situations?

‘You know, you teased me so bad last night. Practically begged for me, then you ran this morning before I could keep my promise.’ Your heart raced, but not from fear. Call it curiosity.

‘What promise would that be?’ You question, voice shaking slightly. Okay, maybe you were still slightly scared.

‘Tell me when to stop.’ He whispered before pressing his lips to yours, but he meant it. If this was too much for you, then he would stop, would let you leave right now, but there was no protest. Just a gasp when he first did it, but seconds later you relaxed. Broken memories flashed in your mind from last night. ‘pretty boy’ and ‘Darling’, along with a very fuzzy make out session.

‘Yoongi.’ You whispered through kisses, making him pull away. His eyes bore into yours, making you throw all caution to the wind. ‘Fuck it.’ You mutter, slamming your lips onto his once again, chasing his scent and taste, the feel of him. You wanted it all, and you would beg in seconds if you were asked.

‘You don’t know what you did to me last night darling.’ He whispered, picking you up with little to no effort, walking to the bed and throwing you down. Your body bounced for a second, his shirt riding up your stomach.

‘Oh? Was I naughty?’ You tease, smirk on your mouth. He growled back at you, falling to his knees in front of you, pulling your crotch closer to his face. Yoongi was wasting no time today. You were sober, had full control over this situation right now, and he would keep it like that, but man did he fucking want you. He planted kisses along your thighs, making little whimpers escape your mouth.

‘You were so fucking naughty. I had more than just a taste of your lips, and let me tell you, it was fantastic. You know, vampires don’t have much self control, but I pulled every ounce I had not to fuck you senseless last night.’ He groaned, already smelling how wet you were. He pulled your panties down painfully slowly, just savouring the way they trailed over your thighs. You weren’t a self conscious person but the way he was looking at your right now had you wanting to close your legs, or smack him in the face. Somewhere balanced perfectly between.

‘You should have just done it.’ You whimper, feeling his breath hit your core, showing you how painfully wet you really were. He laughed before licking a strip up from your entrance to clit, making you arch your back at the contact. It had been a while okay?

‘Really baby? What do you remember from last night?’ He teased, still giving gentle licks to your clit. You thought for a second, trying to think back to last night. ‘Tell me from the start baby, give me the whole story, and don’t stop.’ He smirked, licking one strip with slightly more pressure making you whimper. You knew he was doing it to be a dick, but you might as well join in right?

‘I remember the invitation. Stupid fucking invite. Who designed that by the way? It was a-awful!’ You began, whimpering. The more you talked, the faster and harder he swirled his tongue, having you squirming in his grasp. ‘Anyway, I remember digging through my wardrobe to find a-a costume- fuck. I didn’t want to ah- bring my alcohol over to fuck- you guys, it’s mine.’ You cried, arching your back, tugging on his hair as it tickled the inside of your thighs. ‘I came to the party, the happy looking boy greeted me and shoved a- holy christ- drink in my hand.’ He shoved two fingers inside you wiggling them around to throw you off. ‘Oh my god, you’re so fucking good at this.’ You praised, getting slightly off track. He stopped his tongue movements, fingers still scissoring inside of you.

‘That’s not part of the story now is it darling?’ He teased, darting his tongue out once more, you throw your head back at the fact he gets it RIGHT on your clit. He smirked at the way you responded, enjoying the way you curl for him.

‘You’re right okay. I don’t remember much after- ah-ah-after that. I remember you, I remember fangs. They could have been fa-a-ake though. Everyone was dressed like a fucking vampire. Which reminds me, That memo wasn’t-FUCK- wasn’t on the invite!’ You gasped out, free hand running through your hair brushing it out of your face. He delivered a gentle suck to your clit to test how you would react when you groaned in satisfaction, he did it again. ‘Okay shit, I remember you calling me darling, I remember you taking my dress off, giving me close, I mean clothes, dressing me- fuck Yoongi i’m gonna cum!’ You scream, arching your back, waves rippling through your body as you soak the bed below you, legs snapping shut as you curl in on yourself, waves still rushing over and over your body.

‘Holy shit.’He groaned, pulling his shirt off instantly, wiping his face and hands on it, throwing it lazily to the side. He crawled on top of you, lying you back onto your back, kissing you hard and fast, not caring if you were still going through the aftermath of your orgasm.

‘Was that all you remember?’ He whispers, brushing his nose against yours. It was an unusually soft moment for what was happening, making your heart pitter-patter happily in your chest.

‘I remember you kissing me, saying we had to stop. I remember grabbing for you, wanting you to just fuck me. So do it Yoongi, fuck me.’ You beg, pulling his lips back to yours, revelling in the whimper that slips through his own. He unbuckled his belt with one hand, then his jeans, pulling himself out of his pants.

‘Shouldn’t we use a condom?’ You mumble, thrusting your hips towards him regardless, he laughs at the juxtaposition of your actions and words.

‘I’m dead baby, i’m immune but clean, and I can’t get you pregnant.’ He replied, pushing himself into you, savouring the way your walls clench around him, your pulse spiking.

‘Holy shit.’ Laughing at the way you both spoke the words in unison. You shift your hips to let him know he could move. Sighing, he lifted himself up, slamming into you hard, but not taking a fast pace. He kept it slow, letting you feel every stroke and ridge. You hadn’t fucked without a condom before, but feeling every part of him felt so fucking good, you question why you never asked these questions before. Why you never even wanted to try?

‘You know, there was one thing you forgot, last- fuck- last night.’ Yoongi spoke through grunts, pushing his hips into you, speeding up slightly. Your head was tilted back, and all he could think of was your pulsing artery.

‘What’s that?’ You whine, wrapping your legs around his hips, forcing him in further, squeezing around him as he buried deep inside of you, he groaned at the feeling, wanting to push his hips in further, wanting to fucking ravish you.

‘You stabbed your finger on my fang baby, I’ve had a taste and I’m trying so hard not to take more.’ He growled, showing you his face. His eyes were wide, cast over in lust and hunger, fangs poking out, the last shred of self control diminishing. This morning, the sight made you want to throw up in fear, made you curl in on yourself and flee, but now, it turned you on all the more. You whimpered at the thought of his fangs in your neck, letting your back arch. He wrapped a hand around your throat, covering the artery from his sight.

‘I’m not fucking joking darling, I will bite you.’ He growled, fucking you harder now than before, as if he was fucking some kind of frustration out. He punctuated every word with a thrust, reaching places you didn’t even know someone could.

‘Then do it. Fucking bite me, fuck- claim me Yoongi.’ You moan, numbly grabbing his back as you feel your next orgasm shooting through you. One hand trailed down to your clit as his fangs grazed your neck.

‘Are you sure?’ He whispered, waiting for you to pull away, to take it back, but you didn’t. You laced the blunt nails that did drag down his back, through his hair, pulling as his teeth sank into your neck. He growled at your taste, the liquid coating his tongue as he swallowed. Wrapping his arms under your back, he lifted you up, fucking you sensless as he drew your blood. You were light headed, not sure what sensation you were enjoying more. Your orgasm rushed through you, but you were too tired to cry out, too tired to react other than little whimpers. He sucked until your body became limp in his hands, finishing inside of you at that moment. Ripping his teeth out of your neck, he licked over the area, sealing it up, lying your knocked out frame down on the bed, he ran to the bathroom, grabbing a facecloth. He cleaned you up, slipping a shirt gently back over your head, covering your lower half in a pair of boxers. He lay beside you, waiting for you to wake up. You were still alive, he could tell from the way your chest steadily rises and falls.

‘What happened?’ You whine, peeling your eyes open slowly trying not to wince at the light. Yoongi was by your side in seconds, which you wish you could say you were surprised by. He sat you up, pushing a glass of water into your hands.

‘I took a little too much blood, I’m really sorry…’ He pouted, looking down at the sheet covering you. You laughed at him, sipping the water he had given you.

‘I noticed you dressed me again.’ You teased, letting a comfortable silence settle over you.

‘Are you going to tell, like who we are?’ He questions, hoping to god you say no, hoping with his whole unbeating heart, that you say no.

‘I think, I’ll keep it to myself, that is, if this is a regular occurrence?’ You motion, hoping he understands you mean the sex, he smirks, to which you assume he understood.

‘I think that could be arranged.’ He teases, removing the water from your hand, crawling back on top of your body. You giggle happily before a knock sounds at the door. Yoongi shouts a “Yeah?” towards the door. A voice came through the wood, not wanting to come into the room.

‘I’ll have you know, I was proud of that damn invitation you dicks.’ The happy boys voice sounds from behind the door, not sounding so happy now. You cover your mouth with a giggle, watching Yoongi as he sighed, how did he forget the whole house had supernatural hearing?

#bts #bts one shot #bts smut #min yoongi #bts yoongi #yoongi x reader #vampire yoongi #park jimin #kim taehyung #kim namjoon #kim soekjin #jung hoesok #jeon jungkook #jeongguk

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whatshockey · 5 years

Text

one for the road - a.m.

in which two people who were committed to hating each other find an activity much less draining. or at least emotionally.

word count: 3,921

warnings: mentions of alcohol, drugs, cursing. and smut! the whole shebang.

a/n: i really hate this man. like really hate him. i’m so obsessed with him, it’s disgusting. so i attempted to write something to make me feel better. and let’s face it - the only reason we find auston attractive is bc he plays hockey. i said what i said.

She strutted into hell in heels so high they could be used as weapons, carrying her demons on both shoulders and her head held high. Bodies were strewn, one with another, in every corner of the room, attacking each other’s lips in some fatal attempt to feel alive in the exchange of body heat. It was so warm that the apartment itself could snap a cigarette awake, and she could feel her skin burn with every sip of poison she continued to take. He was no criminal, that much she knew. But the way he looked at his next victim, with mocha tinted eyes soaking every crevice of her skin and bones, should’ve been considered a crime itself. And she couldn’t take her eyes off of him no matter how hard she tried.

Her friend noticed rather quickly, chuckling as he picked out her scowl that grew by the minute. His smile shone brightly in the dimly lit space, and he had to crouch over her shoulder to reach her ear, gently moving a lock of hair behind.

“Careful,” he warned, his velvet voice soothing the dull ache in her head. “If he catches your stare, he might turn to stone.”

She was quick to shove him off with a scoff, rolling her eyes at his remark to the Greek mythological character, and in turn took an audible gulp of the drink that caused her face to tighten up as it rolled down her throat.

“Fuck off, Freddie.”

The wallflowers hadn’t moved much the whole night, finding refuge in the corner of the kitchen of his teammate’s apartment rather than finding another to occupy their time. Had it been any other night, she could be spotted with her back pressed against a stranger of the opposite gender, and sometimes, if you’re lucky of course, one of the same connected to her front, lips dancing dangerously closer as their bodies tangled. The dane next to her, however, always watched the scenes unfold around him, and at times she wondered what sins his gaze held.

The two became good friends over their shared love for the tainted drink they both held at the moment, meeting each other at a bar amongst mutual friends while the rest of his teammates worried about buying drinks for women they’d spotted there. Admittedly, that had been his original intention, but the two laugh about it now. She’d actually been the one who insisted to pay for his drink, pretending she hadn’t known who he was as she bid goodbye with a sultry “congratulations” for the team’s win of the night. And it was safe to say she’d occupied his thoughts for the rest of the week, so much that he found himself revisiting the place they had met just a week later, spotting her at the same spot, and this time alone. He hadn’t missed a beat to acknowledge her, and invited her to sit with the rest of the team, a rosy grin to match his hair dawning on his face as he recognized the younger woman who made him feel as youthful as the rest of his teammates he had come with.

They had all quickly welcomed her into their exclusive group, warm smiles stretching across their features and jokes uttered around. The young professional was well known around the Toronto area, recognizing a few of the players from past events she’d attended. One of the players, however, held an arrogant smirk alongside his outstretched calloused hand, engulfing her contrasting soft small ones. His eyes took her in, from her bare legs to her blackened eyelashes and tousled hair as one of his dropped down into a sly wink. And she was quick to drop his hand within the same second, watching him for the rest of the night from in between two of his teammates, both taking turns in inquiring with questions about her work life and interests, to which she put on her most dazzling smile and answered with her well versed responses, ignoring the feeling creeping up her stomach when she saw the player across the bar with an arm hung loosely around the waist of a woman surely meant to be seen on a magazine cover.

She had been doing the same now, finding refuge with her closest friend of the bunch as she refilled her glass for a second time now. It was now nearing the end of the season, and the lot celebrated the victory of reaching the playoffs, knowing as the pressure picks up, this could be very well be one of the last celebrations for a while. The atmosphere felt oddly similar to that of the first night they all had met each other, which had been followed by their first home win of the season just months ago. Except this time, they had all been packed into a penthouse, expensive booze flowing through their systems and eyes red in exhaustion from a tough season, and no doubt a few drugs passed through some that were not apart of the team. She, however, stayed put, ignoring the few men who had approached her, possessing no professional association with the sport itself, and instead engaged in casual conversations with the few friends she had there, all while attempting to ignore the one man who managed to get under her skin.

He’d seen her now as she leaned elegantly against the stone countertop in a statue-like pose, and lethargically raised the hand that contained his drink towards her direction, a mocking gaze spreading across his features as he toasted to her, the reason why only he’d known.

“What a fucking asshole.”

Her friend’s deep laugh vibrated into her chest, and perhaps she would’ve found the situation amusing as well had it been between a different person. However, the man who’d taunted her from across the forest of legs in between them had proven to be everything she despised in a person, and couldn’t blame this on small interactions that prohibited a deeper connection. In fact, the two happened to spend a large amount of their free time together, with their entire friend group implementing traditions of dinners and drinks at least once a week. While all seemed to get along and truly enjoy their time together, he used his voice to boast about his latest sexual endeavor or to spit an unnecessary and borderline rude remark towards her direction, to which she just rolled her eyes and attempted to avoid confrontation about it all. It was only a matter of time, however, that the others began to notice the tension between the two personalities, both of which they had adored and desired their presences at their plans. But the shift in air would never be brought up.

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you’re a lot more similar than you’d think,” Freddie sighed, taking a final swig of his drink and pushed it onto the counter behind them, holding his hand out in place as he motioned over to the surprisingly empty pool table. “You want to play?”

The two engaged in friendly competition, playing in pairs against Tyler Ennis and Morgan Rielly, the remaining members of the infamous single boys club she had spent so many evenings along with. They played two, maybe three rounds, and it was enough to place a smile and laugh in her throat as one of them scratched and the other sunk a ball into a pocket. Soon the rules had been replaced with their own, and the quartet hadn’t noticed the gathering of a few onlookers who shared a laugh in the chaos as well, each betting on which team would win and deciding what the losing pair would have to do as a consequence.

That hadn’t been explored, however, as the voice of the man she had long forgotten about rang through her ears, causing her partner to turn around at his presence.

“Hey, man,” he clapped the giant on his back, squeezing his shoulder as he slid by. “Mind if I take over?”

She made eye contact with the model that, just a minute ago, was draped across his shoulder. Her piercing eyes sliced through her chest, holding a threat that pooled around her irises, and she began violently shaking her head in response at the exact moment.

“I’m actually kind of tired. You guys go ahead.”

What appeared to be a frown flashed across his features, tracing the edges of the maroon worsted cloth that lay on top of the wooden table as he took the pool stick from Freddie’s hand who’d offered it immediately.

“You’re on a role,” William called from a little ways away, an arm around his girlfriend that was perched on his lap who immediately began nodding in agreement.

“Yeah, don’t worry,” Freddie insisted, smiling as he took in her pleading, and increasingly angered expression. “I’ll take the next round.”

She internally cursed for having such a gentleman as a friend. His charm and patience went unmatched amongst the younger bodies in the room, and the way he leaned against the wall as a new game began made her stomach lurch. If it weren’t for the extra set of eyes taking in her reaction, she would’ve grabbed his bulky arms and begged him to stay, or followed him like a puppy afterwards. And she could almost hear him laughing at her.

Chalking the tip of her stick as she began setting the table up once again, she could feel his presence behind her as she leaned over the table to reach into the pockets for the remaining balls, defeatedly setting the table into a new game. The pair won yet another round, and that had gone to no shock against the arrogance of her new partner.

“No surprise there, eh boys?” he’d laugh, and as thrilled as she should’ve been for winning, his voice caused her to roll her eyes.

He had yet to say anything directly to her the entire night, but as she moved to leave the area, a large hand moved to grasp her own dainty wrist.

“One on one?” he offered, a devilish smirk gracing his plump lips, squeezing as he waited for an answer.

Her body recoiled, disgusted that he would even have the nerve to touch her, and her cheeks burned in fury. The opposing pair had eventually forfeited, having lost yet another round prior against her new partner, one she didn’t want to spend a waking moment of her life with. But as her eyes casted over the rest of the apartment and she noticed her friends that she had arrived with were nowhere in sight, she let out a sigh and finally lifted her gaze to meet his, shuddering at how soft they actually appeared to be up close.

“I’m heading out,” she sneered, pushing away his hand and trying to get around his frame blocking her.

“So am I,” he replied, stepping closer to her as she crossed her arms in defense. Her heart was beating faster, and she didn’t waste her time wondering why.

Looking over his shoulder, she saw no one paying any attention to the two enemies. Even the glare of a pair of perfectly lined eyes and darkened lids appeared to be missing.

“Where’s your girl?” she asked, moving her feet impatiently

“My girl?” he began to laugh, shrugging with a smile that refused to falter even as she glared at his reaction. “Told her to go home.”

She looked at him with an eyebrow raised, expecting him to continue and explain why he sent the dime away.

“She got a little boring.”

“Oh of course,” she started to laugh, faking her realization as she attempted not to roll her eyes. “You need to be entertained at all times like a child.”

He grabbed her waist this time, tattoos flexing across his forearm as he turned her around,pushing her into the edge of the pool table with arms on either side of her short frame.

“You’re the only one here who has a problem with me.”

“Well, we can’t all be your mom.”

His face twisted, clearly upset with the jab she took at his close relationship with his family member. And had she had any lower of an ego herself, she’d apologize, and instead voice how endearing their close relationship was.

“Why are you always such a fucking bitch?”

“I don’t have a reason to like you.” She jabbed a finger at his chest, growing more upset and far too claustrophobic for her liking by the minute.

“You treat women like absolutely shit as if you’re the most attractive player on the team, which we both know you’re not. And the only reason why you do so is to make up for the fact that you’re insecure.” She stared up into his eyes, and if she truly was Medusa like her friend had said, the snakes she’d have for hair would undoubtedly hiss in threat. “So I’m not going to waste my time trying to tolerate a little boy who parades around in designer clothes like he has a big dick, when it holds absolutely no comparison in size to his inflated ego.”

He laughs, and as beautiful as his voice was, it sounded soulless and lonely, cracking as he bit his bottom lip in narcissism and hunger.

“You’re one to talk, babe. How many blokes have you had in your bed, huh? Probably enough to get you ghosted, and that’s why you’re always so pissed.” He chuckled, taking in her low cut top that threatened to spill over any time she bent over the table before. “Or maybe that’s just it. You need someone to fuck you senseless, to let off steam or something.”

Her palms moved against his chest, attempting to push him away. But he continued, refusing to budge.

“Yknow, it’s a shame you won’t ever shut up,” his eyes flickered to her lips, bringing a thumb to her bottom one and pulled it from from her top teeth. “Such pretty lips that could be used for so much more.”

“If you come any closer, I’ll bite you.”

He raised an eyebrow, stifling a laugh. “Oh, so you play like that, huh?”

It was then that she noticed how exhausted he truly looked, small bags drawn under his eyes and his otherwise youthful face held no color. He’d looked more lifeless than he ever had, in fact most of the players did reaching so far into the season, and yet she could honestly say he also never looked more handsome. But she’d never dare to say that out loud.

“The Uber is three minutes away,” he began, daring to edge even closer to her, breath fanning over his face as their noses touches. “I’ll tell them to wait for two, and if you’re not in the backseat with me after one, I promise to leave you alone until the day we die.”

Her eyes narrowed, skin burning under his touch that he had yet to remove on her waist.

“And how do I know you won’t break your promise?”

He smiled, bright and perfectly carved teeth that could blind her vision traced her ear as he dipped down to whisper.

“How do I know you don’t want me to?”

And with a final wink, he turned his back to her and left, never turning around to send her his infamous smirk or remotely any confirmation that she had heard him correctly.

Her feet moved before her mind did, and suddenly she was tripping over he own heels to catch him on his way down on the elevator, her foot coming in contact with the two doors about to close. She could barely manage a “thank you for having us” to the host before she found herself sharing a brief gaze with the man who stood waiting, and within a split second she was backed against the mirrored walls of the elevator just seconds later, legs hiked up against either side of his waist as the throbbing in between her thighs grew. His lips attacked her neck, bruising her on every inch of skin that was left uncovered and accessible, and she could see her reflection over his shoulder with a hand cradling his head to her collarbone, lips parted in a dangerous pout, vulnerable to allowing any noise to slip past.

He groaned against her throat as the elevator dinged, signaling that the two had reached the bottom floor in what felt way faster than the speed an elevator normally ran at. His hand moved from under her thighs to her own, setting her back down onto the ground and dragging her body out of the doors behind his own, opening the door to the car waiting outside and motioned for her to climb in. Before she could get properly settled, she felt his mouth back on her neck, this time dipping lower to trace the curve of her breast as he pulled the sleeves of her top down her shoulder.

They were being so reckless, and the awkward cough from the driver omitted no less. He had forced a moan out from the back of her throat without a care in the world, groaning just as he heard her voice in a state of such desperation, and he didn’t give her enough time to feel embarrassed before ghosting a hand over her clothed core.

Her eyes flew open, and she hadn’t even realized that they were closed before, making immediate eye contact with the driver in the rearview mirror that left her feeling both nervous and extremely turned on. She attempted to shake him off, or at least before they earned a low Uber rating, but instead pushed her deeper into the cramped back seats, sucking and biting harsher against her jaw and throat. And it was certainly not the first time she caught the driver watching them after.

Not long after, or what could’ve been a long time she had no clue whatsoever, the car eventually slowed down, and the back door on his side had flown open before it came to a full stop. He jumped out, muttering a quick thanks to the driver with a strong grip on her hand.

“Hey, you’re Auston Matthews right?” the driver called after him, but half came off muffled as she climbed and held her back to him.

“Nope, never heard of him.”

He slammed the door shut, stifling the laugh that left her mouth with his own, teeth pulling her bottom lip into his.

The two practically ran into his place, and her feet ached that she began wishing he’d been the type to massage her after they’d messed around enough to satisfy each other. Instead, he kicked the door closed behind her, pressing her against the door which caused to wince as the doorknob dug into the bottom of her spine, pushing her chest into his.

He led the two towards his bedroom, throwing her clothes off to the side and expertly unlatching her bra to connect his lips to her breasts. She began kneeling, mouth watering and eyes desperate for her thirst to be quenched as she fondled with his belt buckle to feel a strong grip in the back of her hair, balling it into his fist as he tilted her face up to look at his own.

“As much as I’d love that, we’re not wasting any time tonight, beautiful. Turn around.”

She pouted, but he had given no option as he swiftly picked her up and twisted her body so that she face the wall behind the headboard, soft sheets rubbing against her hardened nipples and knuckles gripping the expensive material in anticipation.

“God, you have no idea how long I’ve wanted you like this,” he choked out slightly out of breath, taking her in as he rubbed slow circles along her dampened core that ached for his own.

“If you’re going to talk this much, at least say something worthwhile.”

A harsh sting came across her ass, sending sparks of electricity and desire racing through her veins as she said something other than his name followed by a few moans in the past hour.

His fingers threaded through her hair again, catching in knots and tangles as he pulled her back against his chest.

“The only time you’re allowed to talk is to ask for permission.”

She would’ve bit back with another snarky remark had he not slid in so easily, forcing her to catch herself from asking for permission to cum right then and there. It was almost embarrassing how wet he managed to get her by barely touching her, that the only plausible theory would be that he’d somehow left her turned on from every encounter they ever had. Except this time around, he had her fully stretched around him, hugging and squeezing his length in every way imaginable. She’d never felt so full and so good with a man before, and she couldn’t remember how to fake an orgasm even if she had tried.

Stumbling forward, she pressed her face against the sheets as tears clouded over her eyes, the only sounds that could be heard in the room were her cries and his groans at the sound of their skin slapping against each other’s. His large palms engulfed her thighs and hips, twisting her body so that he could still see her face in pure bliss

“So this is what you wanted all along? To get properly fucked, huh?” he pushed into her at an incredible force. “Well, sweetheart, all you had to do was ask.”

“Auston,” she begged, hands cramping as her grip on the sheets tightened. “Please.”

It had only taken a few more strokes before he reached a hand down in between them where their bodies connected, collapsing on top of her as she cried out at the added pressure and groaning into her neck for a final time that night as he pulled out to finish on her stomach. And if she had any bit of logic left in her system, she would’ve slapped him for it. But she had been in so much pleasure that it almost hurt, and instead she focused on calming her own heart race, struggling to open her eyes to face reality.

A muscular arm wrapped itself around her torso as she began to get up, this time gently and almost needy. She found it amusing that although he would never voice it, he was in fact encouraging her to stay. And she was allowing herself to fall for it.

“Oh, so you cuddle now?” she teased, falling back into his embrace as his breathing began to already slow down.

“It’s apart of the special we have going on.”

She snorted, rolling into his chest as his arms wrapped tighter around her. She could still feel him still half hard against her thighs tangled with his own, but the two had been too exhausted to continue. There had been so many thoughts beginning to race through her mind. Had anyone seen them leave together? Did she have work tomorrow? What day even was it? She decided to relax for now, finding little care as her body remained buzzing from the work out she had just put it through.

And the guy next to her whom she claimed to absolutely loath? She’d deal with that in the morning.

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blurglesmurfklaine · 5 years

Text

The Chair

Prompt/Summary: “I walked into this restaurant and you thought i was your blind date and i just kind of went with it because i don’t want to eat alone”, as well as based off of George Strait’s “The Chair”

Klaine; AU Alternate Meeting; ~1800 words

A/N: This is like two weeks late bc in case y'all have forgotten I'm the slowest writer in the world lmaooooooo

I hope you don’t mind but I changed it up a little, and this is what happened!

Written for @somefeministtheatrepls ‘s birthday! She’s literally one of the best people I’ve ever met (or.. Not technically met but you get the gist) the best beta a girl could ever ask for and the memeiest meme queen you’ve ever met in your life! Thank you for literally making my day every time I open up my messages and for reminding me of the little things that make life worth living :)

I’m so lucky to have so many supportive and amazing friends in this fandom!

Enjoy!

Read on AO3

Three times.

That made three fucking times, including tonight, that Cooper cancelled on Blaine. All he wanted was a night out with Cooper to catch up, but instead he’s angrily huffing his way out of the restroom after yet another argument with his notoriously flaky older brother.

But of course, of course, Cooper cancelled on him without giving any heads up first. And now Blaine had to go back to that bar and finish his drink (he paid eight dollars for it and he’ll be damned if he lets it go to waste) and look like that one pitiful person every bar has that drinks alone and—

His racing thoughts came to an abrupt halt as he was greeted with the sight of a pale man with perfectly sculpted hair, nodding and smiling politely at the bartender as she takes his order.

The only thing he could think was How the hell am I going to get him to talk to me?

Before he knew what he was even doing, Blaine walked right up to the man and said, “Excuse me, I think you’ve got my chair.”

The stranger turned and looked at him with wide eyes, likely horrified at his apparent rudeness. “Oh-oh my god, I’m so sorry, I didn’t—“ he got up to leave but Blaine stopped him.

“No, no!” He exclaimed, gesturing to the empty seat next to him. “That one’s not taken, so I don’t mind if you sit here, really.”

“Are you sure?” He asked, concern lining his face.

Blaine chuckled lightly. “Yes, I’m sure. It’s usually packed here on Friday nights, and I’d hate for you to have to stand all by your lonesome.”

“Thank you. I’d hate to wait for this blind date all alone.”

“Blind date?” Blaine asked, trying to hide the disappointment in his voice.

“Yeah, my roommate set me up with this guy she barely even knows from her Diction class. She said he’d be here, waiting at the end of the bar—” His eyes went suddenly wide, as if coming to a realization. He looked down at his chair, finally noting that he had the end seat, then looked back up at Blaine. “Oh, my God, I’m an idiot. You’re my blind date!”

Now, Blaine wasn’t particularly proud of what he did next, but he really just couldn’t help himself. The man sitting next to him may have just been a stranger, but he was the type of stranger that he could see himself having a life with. Right now he was just somebody, but Blaine felt that if he got to know the man better, he could be somebody to him. It sounded ridiculous, but Blaine felt a connection as soon as he saw him, and he wasn’t about to let this opportunity pass.

“Yup! That’s me. Can I drink you a buy?” Blaine fumbled clumsily over the words before wincing at them. Nice going. “Sorry,” He continued, rubbing the back of his neck. “What I mean is can I buy you a drink? Anything you please, really.”

“Anything I please?” He teased. “Such a gentleman. Thank you.”

Blaine chuckled sheepishly, deeply hoping that the man couldn’t see his heart beating through his chest. “You’re welcome… I uh, don’t think I caught your name.”

“Kurt,” he smiled. “Kurt Hummel. And it just occurred to me that you must be Aaron.”

Blaine froze for a moment before figuring out how to get himself out of the hole he dug himself into. “It’s uh, Blaine, actually. But it’s fine, I’ve been told my name is kind of out there.”

Kurt rolled his eyes. “It is not okay, Rachel is just terrible with names. If you’re not a fan or a casting director, she’ll forget it as soon as you walk away.”

Well, that’s convenient.

“She sounds lovely,” Blaine joked. “But I’d really love to hear more about you, Kurt. What do you do?”

“Well, right now I’m interning at Vogue.com headquarters with Isabelle Wright when I’m not at school. Over at NYU.”

“Wait a second, you go to NYU?” Blaine asked in astonishment. “Me too!”

“Really? What are you studying?”

“Music Education with a concentration in voice, minor in musical theatre performance.”

“Wow, that’s an impressive mouthful—and course load, I’m sure. I’m in fashion merchandising, but I was actually thinking of adding a Musical Theatre minor, too.” Kurt took a sip of his drink and smiled at him through the straw. “Any advice before I audition for the program?”

Blaine leaned in towards Kurt. “Well, Dr. Williams has terrible taste—and he’s sexist, but that’s besides the point right now—so try to avoid audition dates where he’s on your panel. You’ll get points for Sondheim just because of the difficulty level, so if you have anything of his in your back pocket, I’d go with that. Or, you know, one of those classical killing my baby Arias would probably work too.”

His heart fluttered when Kurt let out a snort, bringing a hand to cover his face. Whatever you’re doing, Blaine, keep it up.

They talked for several more minutes, each glad to be finding out more and more about the other. As time ticked on, Blaine talked about every subject from his annoying older brother Cooper to his opinions on the lack of administrative support for performing arts. In turn, Kurt told Blaine about his family and how life changing his experience in vogue had been.

“Who’s playing tonight?” Kurt asked after the conversation came to a natural lull.

“I don’t know, but they’re pretty good, aren’t they.” Blaine replied. He sat still for a moment, watching Kurt as he nodded his head along to the beat and mouthed the words. Blaine smiled and got up from his chair to extend a hand to Kurt. “Would you like to dance?”

Kurt smiled and nodded, making Blaine’s heart flutter. “I would love to.”

Kurt took Blaine’s hand and lead him to the dance floor where other couples were gently swaying along to the song played by the band.

You look so good in love You want him, it’s easy to see You look so good in love I wish you still wanted me

“You like this song?” He asked with a light giggle, acknowledging the fact that Kurt was lowly singing all the words against his ear.

Kurt chuckled. “I uh, yeah. My mom went through a pretty big George Strait phase before she passed and I used to listen to him when I missed her.”

Blaine furrowed his brows sympathetically. “I’m so sorry to hear that.”

“Thanks… there was this one song that I would listen to when I was really missing her, but I can’t remember the name.” He frowned and twisted his face in thought. “It’s something about West Virginia to Tennessee? And all I have is this beat up leather bag…”

Blaine’s eyes lit up in recognition. “I know that song!” He exclaimed. “We did a Pure Country themed party a few years ago for my best friend's birthday and that song was part of the soundtrack. I’ll be right back.”

Much to Kurt’s dismay, Blaine released him from his comforting grip and made his way through the sea of people towards the stage where the band was playing. He gently noted that his arms felt much too cold without the man he just met in them.

He was suddenly interrupted by a buzzing noise in his pocket.

New Message: From: Rachel ⭐️ Hey, Kurt, sorry this is such late notice I just got out of rehearsal for the spring show but Aaron (Adrian? God, I don’t remember his name) texted me like an hour ago that he wasn’t going to be able to make it tonight.

Kurt furrowed his eyebrows in mild confusion before typing out a response.

New Message: To: Rachel ⭐️ His name is *Blaine* first of all

Secondly, what do you mean? He showed up before I even got here.

No? Send a pic, make sure we’re talking about the same Aaron/Adrien(?)

Kurt glanced warily around the bar, feeling a little weird about Rachel’s demand, but nonetheless quickly snapped a picture of the curly haired man and sent a picture her way.

Cute, but not Anton (I think Anton IS the right name, though)

Wait, so this date I’ve had has been with a complete stranger?

Oooooh, mysterious!

RACHEL

Well… is he a total creep?

Kurt glances up back at Blaine, waiting patiently by the stage to request the song Kurt told him about, looking dreamy as ever with his seemingly permanent yet genuine smile and toned arms and olive skin and...

No…

He’s actually kind of perfect.

In that case, you’re welcome. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth.

Kurt was about to respond that the only he wanted to do with this gift horse was kiss him on the mouth before the lead singer of the band spoke up into the mic.

“This one goes out to Kurt Hummel.”

Blaine happily made his way back to the paler man, extending his hand out to him. “I believe this is your song, Mr. Hummel.”

Kurt slipped his phone back into his pocket before taking Blaine’s hand and heading back out onto the dance floor.

'Cause I'm carrying your love with me West Virginia down to Tennessee I'll be moving with the good Lord's speed Carrying your love with me It's my strength, for holding on Every minute that I have to be gone I'll have everything I'll ever need Carrying your love with me

Blaine felt Kurt wrap his arms around him a little tighter at the chorus. “Is everything alright?” He asked.

“Yeah,” Kurt nodded. “I just… that was really sweet of you to request this song for me.” He admitted, feeling oddly vulnerable about admitting such strong feelings for the stranger in front of him. “I know we just met but… I really like you, Blaine. More than I’ve liked anybody in a long time.”

“I really like you, too…” Blaine trailed off and gnawed on the inside of his lip nervously. “But to tell you the truth… that wasn’t my chair after all.”

Kurt narrowed his eyes playfully and let a smile break loose. “I know.”

Blaine drew his head back in confusion. “Y-you do?”

“Yeah,” Kurt ducked his head shyly and laughed. “Rachel, my roommate texted me about halfway through our date that my blind date wouldn’t be coming.”

“Oh…” Blaine felt color rise to his face. “Look, Kurt, if you want me to go,” he jabbed his thumb behind him. “I get it. I promise I’m not some random weirdo, but I totally get if it freaks you out.”

Kurt responded by pulling Blaine closer. “It doesn’t. In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever been so grateful to have been stood up.”

Blaine let out a sigh of relief. “Me, too.” He further explained at Kurt’s confused expression. “My brother was supposed to meet me here to catch up, and this is like, the third time that he’s bailed on our plans.”

Kurt hummed in mock thoughtfulness. “I suppose that means you know better than anyone that the third time’s the charm.”

“I suppose I do,” is all Blaine said before finally leaning in and pressing their lips together.

#klaine #glee #wow look at me im writing!#somefeministtheatrepls #SORRY THIS IS SO LATE AND SO SHITTY #I PROMISE TO MAKE YOU A BETTER CHRISTMAS ONE

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noramachwitz · 5 years

Text

i wrote a giant review post and i thought i’d keep the momentum going so here’s a giant review on skam nl under a read more

okay so i have to say i loved s1 and i think nl did one of (maybe even the) best versions of s1 i love isa so much and i loved the girl squad and i was super exicted to see their version of s2 since noah/liv were the only version that i didn’t dislike in s1 and i hate to say it but ... i find s2 pretty underwhelming. and i have for a while. i’m still keeping up with it but honestly i’m having some (kinda big) problems with the way it’s written

(and needless to say these are all my opinions and you can disagree it’s fine etc.)

what it boils down to are these points:

1) plot driven - this season is SO plot driven it drives me mad. somehow the entire plot just happens /to/ liv (and i’m not talking about the SA here of course but everything that happens before that) and somehow almost every decision she does make and where they’d finally show her having some agency is off screen?? i keep feeling like everything that happens happens because it’s the next step in the story and there’s little transition imo?? i feel like i always see plot point a then plot point b but a lot of the times i don’t know what actually happened to lead from one to the other for example i still don’t freaking know why liv actually went on a date with him?? or noah saying his brother can’t be trusted but then still believing him. i just feel like liv and noah both as characters just don’t fit into the way they’re going about this story

2) noah - i think noah as a character had a ton of potential to be really insteresting and different but ... NL changed the vibes around him completely and you have this artsy painter dude who seems quite charming and doesn’t take himself too seriously (which monk portrays perfectly ngl) but they just completely failed to adjust the story so it fits his character better. instead noah (in my opinion i’m very sorry lmao) actually behaves more like OG william than most other williams. he acts the same way, he justifies his actions the same way, he even says a lot of the exact same lines and ... why?? why not fully embrance those vibes and actually change the story as a consequence?? i remember soo many people in the fandom saying they can’t see noah beating up someone and it’s true i agreed but then it happened anyway and these moments just KEPT HAPPENING where i couldn’t see him doing something but he did anyway and i just don’t understand why.

so instead of changing things that were easy to change and would make noah better than william they change things that are unnecessary which leads me to one of the biggest plot devices i’ve ever seen: the death of noah’s mum. when i first realised that noah’s mum dies during this season i was actually pretty excited bc i thought they’d use that to explore him as a character more but!! no it was just a two week plot device to guilt trip liv?? and almost every clip we got during that time was just liv feeling guilty and guiltier and her staring at her phone constantly until she ends up at the wake and we find out actually noah wasn’t even close with her and it didn’t really affect him?? and it hasn’t been mentioned since either??? WHY!! instead of giving noah and liv a solid base for a relationship and use that time to idk get to know each other more and like just to talk it just feels to me like they took the easy way out writing wise

also it’s literally the penultimate episode and noah has had ZERO character development and we still know very little about him but we’re still supposed to be rooting for him and liv?? how am i supposed to do that when he’s so underwritten?? this is all such a shame goddamn it

3) time management/pacing - i have no idea if it’s because i binged s1 or not but you can tell so hard with s2 that they’re on a time limit and it always confuses me what they end up coosing to spend time on. prime example: the sleepover clip. we spend 3 whole minutes (yes i checked) with liv going around that wake having that weird conversation that literally adds nothing to anything and then she finally sees noah we see them sit next to each other and listen to a record and ... then liv talks to ralph on the phone and it just cuts to them getting ready for bed like why spend so much time on unnecessary stuff in the beginning and then when there are finally opportunities for development they’ve got no more time left!!!

in general when there finally is a moment of tension or conflict the clip usually ends and we have to wait a whole day or even 2 for another clip and it just really makes me wish we’d get less of these quiet moments (and while they’re definitely necessary too i just feel like nl actually has way too many of them) and just give us more plot movement instead so we can actually get somewhere. this is less of a problem if you only watch whole eps but since this is skam and real time narrative it just doesn’t work for me.

4) conversations - the lack of converstions REAL conversations between noah and liv is sooo frustrating to me. they’ve basically only had ONE real conversation so far and that was when liv broke up with him. that was the first time they actually /talk/ to each other and ... okay i know everybody keeps saying NL is prioritising liv since it’s her own season and that it’s about her and not her realtionship with noah but i mean that relationship is a big part of her story?? and i still don’t know why liv actually likes noah, i don’t know how she realised that she loves him and we haven’t actually like ... seen them bond??

the conversation i did actually really like was the one between liv and esra when she asks if esra has ever been in love but i was just kinda like where did that come from?? they’d made out twice at that point and that was it?? i guess this ties in with the fact that it’s just plot driven which means i don’t necessarily get a character’s motivations since they explore the plot and not the characters themselves. the other actual conversation was the one liv had with engel but there for me it was another case of Where Did That Come From you know? like engel gives liv this whole thing about how she’s scared of chaos which is true but from a storytelling point of view there was nothing to like ... trigger that realisation? i mean of course theoretically i know that the girls are all close friends and just know each other well but when you tell a story (even if it’s skam that’s based in realism and believability) you need buildup to things and i feel like that something that really lacks in skam nl

5) in general - to me personally it just feels a lot like nl shies away from proper conflict a lot because resolving it would take time which they don’t have but that means they don’t build proper tension that drives the plot forward. and i actually have the same problem with s2 in the OG as well don’t get me wrong but i feel like that’s something they could change but haven’t because nl just?? idk seems scared of changing too much?? they change the characters but not the plot but why? who knows, i sure don’t and it’s not they way i enjoy a story being told

okay to end this whole thing on a more positive note lmao here’s some thing i actually do like about this season:

soundtrack is a+ as always nl is good at that

the cinematography and general aesthetic is just ... so pretty (but ngl i feel like that sometimes comes at a cost of substance)

the girl squad! although i can’t say it’s the best as many other people do because i never would have thought iman missing would be this noticeable but for me it throws off the entire dynamic?? anyway but i do like them

esra!! she’s so great

i just love isa

okay that’s all

#1 #2 #3 #4 #5 #skam nl #this got long i did not realise i had this much to say

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anichibicore · 5 years

Text

I made a playlist for Luke Fon Fabre!

I got bored! so! playlist for one of my favorite JRPG protags! here it is! I’m making this post bc I wanna share why I put each song and just bc I like rambling about my favorite tales game haha. I’ll leave all that under the cut tho to keep this from being super long on dashes and stuff. Well, away we go!

Track 1: Bored to Death by Blink 182 At the beginning of the game, Luke makes it clear he’s bored of being trapped inside his family’s manor and wants nothing more than to leave. I can’t point to any lyrics in particular for this choice, but I feel it fits his situation nonetheless. Track 2: Disturbia by Rihanna Luke's just killed a person for the first time ever, and he's torn up about it. His mind doesn't want to leave that fact alone. So he beats himself up over it. Once again, I can't really point to any specific lyrics for this choice, and I'm honestly starting to rethink my choices. Track 3: Field of Innocence by Evanescence Akzeriuth is destroyed. Luke feels awful. His innocence is gone, and all that's left is guilt. He just wants to go back to how things used to be. But he can't, and he's devastated. This is one of the lowest points in his life, and he doesn't know what to do. He's lost.

Where has my heart gone? An uneven trade for the real world Oh I, I want to go back to Believing in everything and knowing nothing at all

Track 4: Afraid by The Neighbourhood This song is the one that inspired this playlist, partly thanks to this post. Luke’s seeing through Asch’s eyes, he now knows he’s a replica, and he’s scared that the others will want to replace him with Asch. Especially as they make their emotions clear about Luke and his actions. But, Luke doesn’t want to be replaced. He’s hoping to get back the trust he lost. But he doesn’t know how. You're too mean, I don't like you, fuck you anyway You make me wanna scream at the top of my lungs It hurts but I won't fight you You suck anyway You make me wanna die, right when I... When I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place When I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place When I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might take my place When I wake up I'm afraid, somebody else might end up being me Track 5: Ghost Rule by DECO*27 This is kind of a personal choice, and this is also going by Rachie’s English lyrics. I can’t point to any specific moment in Luke’s arc where this goes, but I still felt it fit him. Maybe his feelings about being a replica and feeling like his whole life is a lie. A couple of lyrics could be used to refer to his tendency to hide his feelings. Another line could be used to show his guilt over destroying Akzeriuth. I could pick this one apart for days.

I only know how to lie, I guess I really can’t dodge it this time No law to pardon my crime, no clemency for this evil of mine Things don’t look better today, the mask I wear is crumbling away Lapsing in depravity, I didn’t see what was happening to me Track 6: No One by Aly & AJ Luke’s woken up. He’s starting to think about how he’s been and decides he wants to change. He cuts his hair and promises Tear that he’s changing himself to be a better person. He still feels broken, but he’s working to fix himself. One piece at a time.

I am moving through the crowd Trying to find myself I feel like a guitar that's never played Will someone strum away? And I ask myself Who do I want to be? Do I want to throw away the key And invent a whole new me And I tell myself No one No one Don't want to be no one But me Track 7: Brave by Sara Bareilles Luke meets with Guy. His life long friend tells him that there’s only one Luke in his eyes. I feel like this song’s more Guy to Luke, hoping to motivate him to speak his mind and lift his spirits. He wants Luke to be brave. Innocence, your history of silence Won't do you any good Did you think it would? Let your words be anything but empty Why don't you tell them the truth? Say what you wanna say And let the words fall out Honestly, I wanna see you be brave Track 8: This is Me by Kealla Settle (from The Greatest Showman)

Luke nearly died but he came back, and he feels better than ever. He feels alive. It’s funny how finding out you’re slowly dying makes you appreciate the life you have. Still, Luke feels like he can take on anything. And he’s not going to let any of his emotional baggage slow him down now. When the sharpest words wanna cut me down I'm gonna send a flood, gonna drown them out I am brave, I am bruised I am who I'm meant to be, this is me Look out 'cause here I come And I'm marching on to the beat I drum I'm not scared to be seen I make no apologies, this is me Track 9: Fight Song by Rachel Platten This ties into the previous track a bit, with Luke’s feeling of strength, like he can take on anything. He’s got a lot left in him, and like hell he’ll go down without a fight. This is my fight song Take back my life song Prove I'm alright song My power's turned on Starting right now I'll be strong I'll play my fight song And I don't really care if nobody else believes 'Cause I've still got a lot of fight left in me Track 10: She’s So Gone by Naomi Scott (from Lemonade Mouth) Luke’s facing Asch in Eldrant for the final time, and he’s going to prove to Asch that he’s a different person now. He’s his own person, and the fact he’s a replica won’t change that. This fight likely means more to Luke than to Asch. Luke’s going to prove Asch is wrong about him. One way or another. Insecure In her skin Like a puppet, a girl on a string Broke away Learned to fly If you want her back gotta let her shine So it looks like the joke's on you 'Cause the girl that you thought you knew She's so gone That's so over now She's so gone You won't find her around You can look but you won't see The girl I used to be 'Cause she's She's so gone Track 11: This Life is Mine by Jeff Williams and Casey Lee Williams (from RWBY) This song could be any point after Van betrays Luke, tells him he was using him, discards him, anything really. Luke looks back on how Van controlled him, had him essentially wrapped around his finger, and swears he’s going to make him pay and put an end to all he’s been planning for all these years.

Amazing how you conquered me Chained me in servility And made me see The world the way you told me to But I was young and didn't have a Way to know the truth Born to live your legacy Existing just to fill your needs A casualty of this so-called "family" That you have turned into a travesty But I don't intend to suffer any longer Here's where your dominion falls apart I'm shattering the mirror That kept me split in pieces That stood between my mind and my heart This is where I'll start I'm not your pet Not another thing you own I was not born guilty of your crimes Your riches and your influence Can't hold me anymore I won't be possessed Burdened by your royal test I will not surrender This life is mine! Track 12: Angel With a Shotgun by The Cab The battle against Van has begun. Luke and Tear work together to take down the man they had been so close to for years, and while each second is painful for them, they know there’s no other choice. Luke will free Lorelei once all is said and done and that will be the end of it. Nothing else matters to him right now. I'm an angel with a shotgun Fighting til' the wars won I don't care if heaven won't take me back

Track 13: Home by Daughtry Luke’s freed Lorelei, he and Asch have joined with Lorelei, and the world is saved. His friends all miss him, and on his coming of age ceremony, Tear is singing alone in Tataroo Valley. The rest of Luke’s friends join her, and as they mourn their lost friend, a figure appears in the distance. A figure that resembles Luke. He’s come home. I'm going home Back to the place where I belong And where your love has always been enough for me I'm not running from No, I think you got me all wrong I don't regret this life I chose for me But these places and these faces are getting old So I'm going home Well, I'm going home

Track 14: Shape My Heart by Eyeshine

I didn’t add this one until after I made this post (I’m editing this post to include it) but this is another general one and not one i added bc the singer of this band was johnny yong bosch i swear. It’s the party to Luke because he unintentionally helped some of them change the way they view the world, even if it was only a little bit. His presence made things just a little bit better.

You take our pain away

You make our world okay

You shape our hearts so we can feel what love is

You take our hate away

#Tales of the Abyss #tales of series #character playlist #tota spoilers #luke fon fabre #long post #aniposts

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alexanderpearce · 5 years

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Your favourite books? Or favourite classic literature books? I trust you have great taste and I hope it’s okay asking for some recommendations 🖤

Oh God Oh Fuck !!!! I'm v flattered!!

first of all i made a post w book recs like a While Back, but i still stand by what i said there so u can check that out !! (pls yeah check that out bc i LOVE all of the books on there a Lot and i won't rly talk abut them here)

my fave book Ever is the secret history by donna tartt pls check that shit out i already talked about it in the post linked above but will i ever shut up about it? no.

anyway. some of my favourite classic lit books are,

the picture of dorian gray by oscar wilde; obv one of my favourite books for Gay Reasons, but also just a gorgeously written book w some really interesting ideas. if u don't know its about a man who has a portrait painted of him that ages and shows all his sins while he stays young and beautiful

brideshead revisited by evelyn waugh; (also mentioned in the other post) also a Gay Subtext Book, full of beautiful imagery, follows a man called Charles and his relationship with the Flyte Family™; he has romantic relationships with (subtextually) sebastian flyte and (explicitly) his sister julia. a very emotional book.

and the hippos were boiled in their tanks by jack kerouac and william s burroughs; infinitely more niche than the two above, and also a whole lot more polarising, this book gives a fictionalised account of the 1944 murder of david kammerer. the prose in this one is really different to anything I've ever read, and i can't help but recommend it even though a lot of people might not like it. if fact, tons of people (critics, average reviewers on goodreads, even the book’s own authors) kinda hate it. but i love it! It somehow spun this really exquisitely vivid image of 1940s sunbaked new york. if you don't know anything about that murder or the beat generation in general (first of all id say read allen ginsberg’s poetry, and on the road by jack kerouac, but i haven't even read any other beat prose fiction, so i can't talk) id say watch the movie kill your darlings, and then come back to this book if you find yourself interested!

playing beatie bow by ruth park; not really a classic, as it was published in 1980, but def an aussie contemporary classic! if ur australian and u haven't read this, read it, and if ur not australian, read it. its about a girl called abigail who accidentally travels back in time to victorian era sydney. its one of my childhood favourites and is just,. such a good and nice book.

also i Love frankenstein by mary shelley, the great gatsby by f scott fitzgerald, and julius caesar by william shakespeare

also got to list some Classics classics for the sake of myself.

the works of catullus literally on god pick up a copy of this as soon as u can if ur interested (or read ‘em online ofc). absolute MAD LAD catullus talks about sex and sparrows (though not at the same time?) and oh That Metre Though. try to find a translation done like. in the past 30 years? cause tons of the old ones are super censored, but I'm not much of an authority on catullus translations (yet!)

the works of sappho also pick up this as soon as u can if u haven't read them yet ! I've just reread all her stuff recently and i can't believe i forgot how beautiful all her poems are... (the book searching for sappho by philip freeman is a really really good book About Sappho, and i also really like freeman’s translations of her poems)

can't go wrong with the iliad and the odyssey by homer (oh I'm a fake fan i haven't read the odyssey yet), and metamorphoses by ovid (get those sweet sweet classical myths, and in a sexy metre!)

medea and orestes by euripides suck and are bad bc of like. le epic woman hate, but also i love a sexy little greek tragedy.. they are so short and homoerotic.

misc books i legally have to recommend

the conspiracy of catiline by sallust

and catilina’s riddle by steven saylor

tipping the velvet by sarah waters (wlw 1890s england time!)

just read n for narcissus by chris hunt (mlm 1890s england time!) and i think that it and the first in the series, street lavender, are out of print, but they're pretty damn good!

interview with the vampire by anne rice

the book of martyrdom + artifice by allen ginsberg (also really only for beat megafans like (reluctantly) myself. its allen ginsberg’s early journals and let me tell u this bloke was fucking Off It 24/7 and this book has kept me so amused, its super super interesting)

boy this sure fucking turned out really long

#sorry anon im real big idiot rambler.#asks #anon #book recs #recommendations

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archiveofolives · 5 years

Text

tagged by @captainmrvels, tyvm!! here's the funny thing tho: i don't watch tv shows anymore :D sometime between 2014 and now, i decided it was no use pretending and completely stopped trying to catch up with the episodes i'd missed so i'm just going to sort of retrofit this questionnaire to make it applicable to me! i hope that's ok ❤️❤️❤️

Pick 5 shows fandoms, then answer the following questions (don’t cheat!)

marvel (oh i just realized the avengers have a cartoon series!)

ff7 (errr movie and oav?)

ace attorney (it has an anime! does that count)

star wars (eh)

his dark materials (hey this one at least has a tv show coming out soon)

1. Who is your favorite character in 2?

it's this guy cloud strife, you may have heard of him from my blog lmao

2. Who is your favorite in 1?

WE ARE LOKI ON MAIN FOR A REASON, BABY

3. What’s your favorite episode of 4?

HA this one worked like a charm. ummm probably episode 7 bc that made me feel Things and i loved rewatching it as compared to the others. altho if we bring in every other movie in-between, it's obviously rogue one. BUT i DO have a special place in my heart for episode 1! i've been a star wars fan since i was a kid thanks to my dad but i was obsessed with episode 1, it really pushed all the right buttons for me. like i wouldn't call it a solid movie next to episode 7 but man is it a classic!

4. what’s your favorite season of 5?

i think i will love every season when they do come out but book-wise, i think you can't beat the level of wonder of northern lights/golden compass, depending on which edition your bookstores sold. my REAL absolute favorite tho has got to be once upon a time in the north bc the leads are basc my two favorite characters lmao

5. Who’s your favorite couple in 3?

OH MAN mia fey and godot! i'm such a trash for tragic relationships and i think they looked very handsome together!

6. Who’s your favorite couple in 2?

cloud and aerith—my home ship since 20 years ago and the reason, i think, a lot of my ships tend to be on the tragic side >.>;; but i just love the tropes they're hitting, you know? and then how their colors and characters complement each other, i think they're a very attractive couple

7. Least favorite episode movie of 1?

movie bc it's easier than the comics lmao. but probably dr strange? icn say it's civil war bc it has spider-man, black panther and ant-man which for me are the only things really worth seeing in there but dr strange doesn't really even have that much of a hook for me to begin with. i wouldn't have gone and seen it if not bc of my team who wanted to see it for our team building excursion lol

8. Favorite episode of 5?

find me anything with lee scoresby in it baby!!!

9. Favorite season installment of 2?

i think i will forever be devoted to the classic polygon game, the one that started it all, y'know? but i'm really excited for the remake and i really enjoyed ff7ac/c! i also have not played the other games in the compilation bc money and time lmao (says the woman who just spent 12 hours on the game yesterday like some high schooler >.>;;; i just got aerith's great gospel and i already miss her ;_;)

10. How long have you watched 1?

i have been a clown since 2012

11. How did you become interested in 3?

we got a ds lite!! and then everyone kept raving about the phoenix wright game so my sister got it for us and then one day, i just decided to watch and help her play the third case and now, it's part of how we bond. we've always solved cases together ever since, they're much easier and less creepier that way

12. Favorite actor in 4?

oh wow, another lucky hit! ummm ewan mcgregor? i was a huge fan of his obi-wan kenobi like, icn remember calling other characters my favorite after his obi-wan anymore. so i'm really excited he's going to reprise the role, finally!!

13. Which do you prefer, 1, 2, or 5?

oh god, probably 2?? bc between the three of them, ff7 has had the biggest influence in my life. like seriously, the reason i'm in my job rn is bc of it—i went to college to take up computer science bc i wanted to make games like ff7 lmao but that didn't work out bc calculus is the worst. STILL it pushed me to the right direction of being in stem!

14. Which have you seen more episodes new releases of, 1 or 3?

i'm gonna have to say 1 for the obvious reason that they've released more movies than 3 has released games bc they're the products of an entertainment tycoon, you know? while with 3, there's still a part of it that still feels like a passion project and i haven't seen the anime yet lmao.

15. If you could be anyone from 4 who would you be?

i'd be a rebel. when i was a kid, i wanted to be a jedi, tho, lol

16. Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work?

ACE ATTORNEY IN SPACE. SPACE ATTORNEY AHAHAHAHAHA. i mean WHY NOT, you've got coruscant, you've got imperial sympathizers sowing discontent to lead to the first order (i think), you've got other separatists while we're at it, smuggling, bounty hunting, the fall of the jedi order. especially after rotj, i can imagine how active the courtrooms were with the war criminals and the petty ones taking advantage of the shift of government. the feys are obviously of the force, the von karmas could be a family linked to sympathizers, maybe nick is even attuned to the force which is why mia singled him out! it's easy to work out the whole thing ❤️

17. Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely ok couple.

but marvel is already doing that job for me lmao. ummmm jane and roz solomon? but it's not unlikely bc they ARE friends and roz was the first person jane confided to about being thor. really icn think of anything off the top of my head, i'm not a shippy kind of person unless the canon lays it out before me and i get convinced. which, in itself, is rare.

18. Overall which show franchise has a better storyline, 1 or 3?

3, hands down. i'd much rather miss more movies of 1 than new releases of 3. it's in the quality of the storytelling, y'know? which isn't to say i loved all games lol i mean honestly, if you ask me? i'd tell you apollo justice is a huge au.

19. Which has better theme music, 2 or 4?

OH THIS IS A GOOD QUESTION. you're asking me who did it better, john williams or nobuo uematsu??? damn, they're both solid composers with amazingly timeless pieces but from my biased point of view, you can't beat nobuo uematsu. his work on final fantasy as compared to williams' work on star wars is more varied and he freaking makes MIDI sound like an orchestra!! and, he was the fucking soundtrack of my childhood. i was SO lucky to have been raised in a generation where he still did the music to all final fantasy games.

tagging: OH NO I DON'T KNOW WHO TO TAG DDDD: ummm @summoneryuna watches lots of shows, right??? @egregiousderp but with anime?? @safarikalamari just bc???? lmao idfk

#memes #tumblr #liv is typing

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thedeaditeslayer · 6 years

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Q&A with Bruce Campbell: He’ll host his ‘Last Fan Standing’ at ECON on Saturday.

Here’s an interview from last week that we here at TDS recommend to Bruce Campbell and Evil Dead fans.

The fourth-ever EUCON: Eugene Comic Con is just around the corner, and this year it’s going to be bigger than ever, full of fresh programming and infused with new direction and energy, says artistic director Zachary Davis.

The pop-culture convention is under new management from Davis and his team at Imagination International, Inc., and they’ve wrangled a host of local, indie and big-name artists and celebrities, including actor, writer and director Bruce Campbell and his traveling game show, “Last Fan Standing.” Campbell is best known for his character Ash Williams in Sam Raimi’s “The Evil Dead” movie series, which thrust him onto the Hollywood scene in 1981.

“I want to see what Eugene’s all about as far as comic cons go. It’ll be a whole new experience,” Campbell told The Register-Guard. “I’ve only done Portland. Comic cons are the new rage now.”

Ash and “The Evil Dead” have garnered a cult following, and Campbell’s lengthy career has taken him from B-horror movies and Syfy channel movies, to recurring roles in popular ’90s TV series such as “Hercules: The Legendary Journey” and “Xena: Warrior Princess,” to roles in all three of Raimi’s blockbuster “Spiderman” movies, and a co-starring role in USA’s seven-season TV show, “Burn Notice.” He’s authored three books and is now hosting a pop-culture trivia game show, which will be played on Saturday at EUCON.

The Register-Guard interviewed Campbell by phone Tuesday from his home in Jacksonville about life in the Oregon countryside, finally laying to rest his Ash character with the cancellation of TV series “Ash v. Evil Dead,” and his pursuits as a writer, a game show host and actor. The interview has been edited for clarity and length.

Bruce Campbell: Twenty years this year. My primary residence has been Oregon for 20 years — not that I was here that much, but when I’m home this is it.

RG: Why did you choose Oregon?

B.C.: A lot of reasons. My mother dabbled in real estate in this area — she sort of retired with her husband in this area, and so I came up to visit and she faxed me some places to look around — back in the day of faxes — and this is about the third, fourth place we saw out in the country, and just the hair on the back of my neck stood on end.

It’s mountain scenery and isolation and quiet. You don’t get that when you live in Los Angeles, you know. You go to work, everything’s crazy and noisy, and then you come back to L.A. everything’s crazy and noisy — there was no break. When I look out my window here, there’s nothing. There’s no lights on the mountain. There’s no noise, there’s no traffic.

We’ve been invaded by the pot growers now. We’ve gone from beer and meth as the local standbys, to weed and wine. So we’re stepping up. People with weed and wine have cash, and they tend to stimulate the local economy more than people who drink beer and do meth, with all due respect to our meth heads. Stoners don’t tend to go out and beat people up.

RG: Do you have any weird or strange stories to share about living in the country?

BC: Of course. The best reference I can tell you is my third book, “Hail to the Chin, the Further Confessions.” There’s chapters all about moving from L.A. to here — there’s all kinds of car crashes and drama and serving on jury duty. It’s a lot of simple pleasures.

’Cause my daughter is a California kid — born in Michigan, but raised in California — she came up here to visit. We did some errands, and we park at the bank, right in the lot. Go inside, there’s two guys in line — hey Joe, hey Ken — saying hi to the tellers, no ghetto glass — go outside, you gotta go to ... a place that’s usually busy, park right out front, go in, get our stuff and leave. She’s like, “So is that how it works in this town — you just sort of do stuff, and it happens?” It’s like “Yeah,” because when you’re not completely and utterly overcrowded, this is what life can be like. It’s kinda nice.

So I’ll actually never go back to civilization. Because my idea of civilization is the 24-hour available little toilets in my little town of Jacksonville. That’s how you know your town is livable. When they trust their citizens enough to have (those public bathrooms). Jacksonville is my last stop before I head out into the country, and sometimes those bathrooms are really handy. You know, lousy weather and strange times of night, you stop in there, heated, that tells me that the town trusts me enough to not totally destroy it every time I use.

But now Portland, I don’t think they have those.

RG: Now that “Ash v. Evil Dead” is officially cancelled, how do you feel about finally letting Ash go?

BC: Good. I’ve retired him. I’ve officially retired from playing that role — never done that with a character before. It feels great because it’s time to move on. I physically kind of got to the point where I can’t do that guy anymore. Hamstrings tear and they stretch, your eyes go your hearing goes, everything goes eventually. So I think it’s time to do game shows, you know? Time to put the chainsaw down — I’m a 60 year old man.

RG: Can you tell me a little bit about your game show?

BC: It is “Last Fan Standing” It is a game show for geeks. We’re going to ask how much does Thor’s hammer weigh? It’s not about history or geography, you don’t have to add a “what is” to the beginning of your answer. You just answer. And everybody plays. Everybody who walks in that door can take it on because they’re each given a voting device. (There’s) about 15 early questions ... and they vote. At the end we tally who’s got the best scores, we pick that clicker number and they’re up and running. We do two rounds of that, cook it down to two winners of each round, and then we do a seven question sort of battle to the death and somebody walks out of there with an amazing gift, which I can’t reveal. It’s too amazing.

RG: Why do you like being the host? Is it fun for you? Is it work? Is it both?

BC: No, I like tormenting people! You find out where they’re from, what these people do. We’ve had school teachers, students, college professors, tattoo artists. It’s really anybody from any walk of life, men, women, we’ve had some younger folks, so it’s been really fun taking it around to conventions and testing it out. So what we started doing this year was booking it in an actual theater like a performance arts venue, 400 or 500 seats and just doing it that way, like it’s an evening show. It’s a two-hour evening show, people realize they can have a lot of fun they can interact they can shout and holler because if our panelist can’t get the question — you’d be surprised how often they can’t even though they got up there — we throw ’em out to the audience, and I give out autographed “Bruce Bucks,” that’s fake dollar bills. Fake hundreds. So they still play, everybody plays. We’ve had some people come up, they got in the second round too. So it’s kinda crazy.

There’s come-from-behind wins the way it’s structured. My partner Steve Sellery, he’s the guy that first introduced me to this format, but ... he was doing it for military bases, it was all military trivia. I went to host a show for him so I said, “Hey, this format could work in my world.” It was really fun, these soldiers were all shouting at each other, and it was very competitive. I thought, “Man, you could do the same thing.” Three years ago, Steve called me up to see if I would host this charity show for the troops at the Fort Sam Houston base in San Antonio, Texas. And it was great. We had 600 soldiers, forced attendance, all in uniform. And this game just blew the doors off — these guys were acting like regular civilians by the end.

So we experimented there and I thought it could be taken elsewhere, and so we’ve been shopping it around, and eventually I’m going to try to get it made as an actual real TV show.

RG: So we might actually see it on air someday?

BC: That’s my goal. We’ve been honing it and refining it and tweaking it so we’re going to finish this run of performances. I’ve got three or four other cities to go, and then we’re done.

RG: So Eugeneans will have the chance to come out and see this before it really gets started?

BC: That’s right. Play it now while you still can!

RG: I heard that you consider yourself selectively retired, is that true?

BC: Selective — that’s a good way to put it. I’m not retired, it just takes more to get me off the mountaintop now.

RG: What kind of projects besides this game show project are you working on?

BC: “Lodge 49,” a new show for AMC, I just did that for their first season. I just did three episodes of that, and they’re back for another season. I’m not sure about my character, he’s mostly dead by the end of it. But you know, I’m looking for quality stuff. Paul Giamatti, he’s one of the producers, the writing was great, they just had really good people working on this show, and that’s kind of what I’m looking for. I’m not really looking for more movies for the Syfy channel.

RG: No more of those, huh?

BC: I think I’m good. I think I’ve done with my last “Alien Apocalypse.”

RG: What are some of the things you actually pay attention to and are interested in as far as pop culture, since we’re going to be at comic con. What are some things that grab your attention?

BC: Not much. I’m an entertainer. My job is to entertain. I don’t have to know what the answers to these questions are, and I don’t. I don’t know the answers to them. I watched very mainstream stuff as a kid. My buddy Sam Raimi actually read “Spiderman” comics. I read a comic called “Sad Sack.” The guy was a loser grunt in WWII. He was always peeling potatoes. That’s what I was more interested in, the stories of the average schmoe, which is why Ash appealed to me, because he had no special skills. He was just his guy who worked at S-Mart.

That’s what appealed to me, playing real characters and, you know, acting in modern day movies is a very special skill, it’s very technical, and I got tired of looking at tennis balls on sticks. There’s the monster! Now it’s over here — OK 3-2-1 — shake the camera and blow the thing and hit the blood! You know, none of it is just letting a scene play out. Whenever you have any kind of monster fighting or special effects, you go shot by shot, not scene by scene, and it can be very disconcerting. You don’t know where you are in the piece of this big puzzle. It gets a little boring.

RG: One of my favorite films I think I’ve seen you in is “Bubba Ho-Tep.”

BC: Yeah it’s a cool little movie.

RG: What is one of your favorite roles acting?

BC: Well that’s more for the pundits but Bubba was top five, “Evil Dead” movies top 5, like the Hercules and Xena character, Autolycus, King of Thieves... a lot of kids spent their Saturdays watching those shows. “The Adventures of Brisco County Jr.” was a very brief one-off but really cool, ahead of its time, kind of steampunk western, so there’s been some fun stuff.

The longer you hang around, good stuff shows up. And you learn what not to look for anymore. And you learn the warning signs of trouble. Like when you make a couple of bad movies, you log in the back of your mind, why they were so bad, even yourself included, and you say to yourself, “OK, how do we avoid that?” But as a young actor you just say yes to everything. So it’s just a matter of being pickier now. Way pickier.

RG: What is the worst movie experience you’ve had?

BC: Well, it’s no fun pointing those out, but I would just say that it’s usually a combination... I’ll give you one example where I said no and I’m glad I did. Sci-fi script comes in. Tons of effects. Tons of action. You know, this, that and the other thing. So I say to myself, “OK yeah, you’re going to really need a journeyman director, that’s a lot of moving parts, to pull this off.” OK, who’s directing? It’s a first-time guy who wrote the script. Right there the bells go off. And you go, “First-time guy, who’s going to handle this...?” As my own director, I go, this would be challenging to someone with experience. And writers generally, in my opinion, make terrible directors because they have no sense of how a set works and they’re not great communicators because they sit in front of a frickin’ monitor all day long. ... Then I go, “OK, First-Time Guy, I get it. How long is this shoot?” And I know from knowing production what is a long shoot, what is a medium shoot and what is a short shoot, and they go, “Three weeks.” I’m like, “I’m out.” ... Because the producers now, now I blame the producers, they need to give this guy the most amount of time he possibly has. So that combo platter right there, I went “Pass. Just pass. Not interested.” So that’s what you learn. Years ago I’d say yes and then you go, “Geez what a ... fight that was,” you know what I mean?

RG: Do you think Ash’s ‘everyman’ qualities have maintained the popularity of the “Evil Dead” series?

BC: Yeah. Because people are shouting at the screen “You idiot, what are you doing?” You know he makes horrible mistakes because it’s not his job, he’s not a superhero, wasn’t born to it even though, in some ancient books, his picture is in it. So, it was fun to play the normal guy but then know that there were spiritual undertones, which is kind of cool. Because he is there to save the world. He’s been foretold as ‘The Guy.’ We were glad to be able to go back and revisit it with more experience, because the irony of my life is that I’m best known for the role of Ash in the first “Evil Dead” movie where I had no experience. So it’s nice to go back and go, “OK ... it’s 25 years later, I got some skills now. Now let’s take on this character and try and blow him into a three-dimensional character out of a two-dimensional situation.” So that’s what it was fun about it. But it was difficult because we’re older. Things tear.

RG: Well, it’s a very high-action TV show.

BC: Very much so, I had the hardest-working stuntman in show business, Raicho Vasilev.

RG: And you got to work with Lucy Lawless, how was that?

BC: Well it’s always great, always has been, for 20 years I’ve worked with her. She’s one of the good ones, as they say. Lee Majors as my dad? Who can top that? Frickin’ Bionic Man is my dad.

RG: What is it like having this celebrity status attributed to you as one of the most popular B-movie actors, what do you think about that?

BC: It’s impossible for me to quantify it. It’s not for me to say. It’s always nice to not wallow in obscurity — I didn’t get into the business to do that. But you don’t know where it’s going to go. That’s why you’ve got to be mellow about the whole thing. I have no idea what’s going to happen tomorrow in this industry, and it’s changing all the time: the way they make movies, the way they deliver them, the types of movies they’re making. I think I’m just going to enter into the game show phase of my career and see where it goes.

RG: What do you think it is about you that has built such a loyal fanbase, especially with the “Evil Dead?”

BC: Just relatable characters. You’ve got to have a character people will relate to. There’s some actors who will remain nameless who — they don’t let you in. Their performance won’t let you into their world. They’re putting up a sheen. And I think it’s all fine and pretty to look at, but you know, you got to have more. There’s got to be more to it, even an idiot like Ash. You’ve got to have more to it. That’s why we introduced Ash’s daughter. We meet his family, we start to play on a little bit bigger reason why he’s here, what his purpose is. When you look at someone on screen I think you want to go, “Wow, God, I’d love to have a beer with that guy,” or if it’s a woman, “Man, what a great girlfriend she would be.” Stuff like that. It’s just a personal thing too, and every actor evolves into whoever they are by a certain set of circumstances. Some good, some bad.

RG: In the latest phase of your career you’ve turned to writing books. Why become a writer? What is it about writing that you like?

BC: I love books because there’s no shifts. You make a movie, and especially a high-price movie, there’s a lot of people with opinions who are very bossy all the time. And they will hound you about the smallest little things, little changes, and they have to justify their positions as assistant this or executive this or sub-pseudo-quasi this. And when you write a book, you know, I get on the phone with my editor, and they go, “Hey this one chapter, you sound a little pissed off, was that what you want?” I go, “Yeah, I can tone that down.” And I’d tone it down, it’d take about 20 minutes and then I’m done and we never have another word.

I spent more time with my lawyer than my editor because of the (crap) that they care about. But the process is really great, it’s really rewarding creatively, and financially they don’t (mess) around. They know how to add and subtract in publishing. For some reason in movies they’ve forgotten the ability to add and subtract. It’s a much more straightforward — you call someone in publishing, they call you back. You call someone in movies, you know it’s like their assistant will get back to you a week later, and they’ll run by three dates of where they could have a conversation. You know, just call me back. So I like the old-school nature of publishing. It’s getting pretty modern, but the people involved are very straightforward. They’re in it for the literature, not for the limousines....

RG: So do you write at your Oregon home?

BC: Yes. I have an office that’s just about completed. I’m so excited it’s just about impossible to be patient. It’s a brand-new setup where I can get busy in 2019. There’s going to be a lot of writing in 2019.

RG: What can we look forward to?

BC: New book. I’m going to tour in 2020, it’s a book of essays, it’ll be something a little different. If you want to be a real writer you can’t just talk about the wacky times you got dumped with blood on a film set.

RG: Well that was probably a pretty good starting point, they say write what you know about.

BC: Now I’m going to write what I don’t know about.

#Bruce Campbell #Last Fan Standing #Ash vs Evil Dead #Ash vs. Evil Dead #Evil Dead

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racingtoaredlight · 3 years

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THE DEGENERATE’S GUIDE TO COLLEGE FOOTBALL TV WATCH ‘EM UPS 2021: WEEK ONE, TIME FOR THE GOOD STUFF

This is by far the best “opening” slate of games we’ve had in at least a couple of decades. The great thing about having a bunch of cross-country, inter-conference, top 25 matchups in the first week of the season is that we’ll all have a clear expectation of every team involved and will mostly have those ideas flipped over by the end of the month. Answers to questions but wrong, you know?

That’s ok because, really, the whole college football season is that same cycle over and over. And we love it, don’t we folks? We love it more than dying unfulfilled and for no reason with nothing at all to show for it in the larger scheme of the world. College football is a metaphor for life which is just an elaborate metaphor for college football.

Blah, blah eastern times and websites. There have already been approximately one million games played this week with a few FCS over FBS upsets and, upsettingly enough, Kansas was not one of the losers. Whooooooooo! Let’s get it on!

Saturday, September 4

Fordham at Nebraska 12:00pm BTN

Fordham +46.5 might be the safest bet you can make this week.

ULM at Kentucky 12:00pm SECN

What can you say about Kentucky being favored by 31 over anybody except that it seems incredibly overconfident. They aren’t ranked in the top 10 so I assume they either skip Bama this year or don’t play them until October.

Temple at Rutgers 12:00pm BTN

In real time the scheduling is fine but these first handful of games feel like a punishment for me crowing about the general quality of this week’s matchups.

Tulane at 2 Oklahoma 12:00pm ABC

These are the games that come back to win Heisman trophies for Oklahoma QBs later in the year. If the Sooners don’t beat the spread (-31.5) they probably shouldn’t keep their ranking next week.

Holy Cross at UConn 12:00pm CBSSN

If you can still get UConn -4 anywhere don’t. Holy hell that’s bleak. 4-points at home against Holy Cross. It’s getting real close to time to turn the lights off on the Huskies football program.

Colgate at Boston College 12:00pm ACCN

If the Toothpastes can just score more than 7 they will have outperformed expectations. If they score more than 7 and hold BC under 60 they will likely have beaten the spread. Chomp ‘Em, Colgate! (I don’t think that’s really their motto but it should be.)

Western Michigan at Michigan 12:00pm ESPN

I could’ve sworn Michigan played last week and lost but maybe I’m just used to that.

Stanford vs. Kansas State (in Arlington, TX) 12:00pm FS1

There have been times over the last 25 years where this would be a matchup befitting of a premium neutral site but this is not even close to being one of those years. Definitely not in week one, at least.

19 Penn State at 12 Wisconsin 12:00pm FOX

Nobody will ever make it make sense that Penn State still has a football program, let alone a football program that puts some of the best athletes into the NFL year after year in a post-Sandusky world.

Army at Georgia State 12:00pm ESPNU

I can’t be the only one that thinks if the troops put together a football team with the best training and facilities available they’d still get their asses handed to them week after week like they do in illegal wars of aggression.

Fresno State at 11 Oregon 2:00pm P12N

Kayvon Thibideaux didn’t make the list of “freaks” this year in the Athletic and I can’t tell if I’m just wildly overrating his abilities or if there was some weird oversight due to him announcing that he’ll be playing more standing up on the outside than with a hand in the dirt. Anyway, he’s fun to watch when he’s just pinning his ears back and rushing the QB and Fresno State throws a lot so this could be worth a few minutes of entertainment in this weird in-between time slot. Though, be warned, early kickoff Pac-12 games do tend to suck.

Lafayette at Air Force 2:00pm Stadium

Air Force favored by 42.5. You don’t see that often.

Rice at Arkansas 2:00pm ESPN+/SECN+

A beautiful reminder of the old SWC. Nothing else. And that’s probably not enough reason to watch this. Arkansas is probably pretty bad but I have trouble believing Rice is going to keep it within 20 of anybody on the road.

17 Indiana at 18 Iowa 3:30pm BTN

B1G’s plan is to prime the polls early so their teams seem better later on. I’m not falling for it. These are two shit teams that will only look good within the context of the B1G.

14 Miami (FL) vs. 1 Alabama (in Atlanta, GA) 3:30pm ABC

Miami’s starters are about as old as an average NFL team’s and they’re still gonna get run over by the Bammers. The Canes do actually have a decent stock of pro prospects right now but a lot of these guys were on the field against UNC last year watching as the Tar Heels put up 3,492 rushing yards. So it’s a bunch of middle aged mid-round prospects against a shiny new crop of future stars. Bama should just get an auto-bid for the playoffs at this point until they prove they don’t belong anymore. I’m calling it now: it’s fine, I had a bunch of chores to do around the house anyway.

Marshall at Navy 3:30pm CBSSN

Ah, the AAC. So dear to my heart. I hated everything Navy did last year but last year was a mulligan anyway. This year might be, too, in the end but for now we can pretend it’ll go off without a hitch.

Miami (Ohio) at 8 Cincinnati 3:30pm ESPN+

The Bearcats are the darling of mainstream coverage if you’re looking for a playoff Cinderella. Which usually means they’ll lose three games in the regular season and won’t even make it to their conference championship.

West Virginia at Maryland 3:30pm ESPN

Wait, is this a conference game now? A future conference game? I won’t be paying close attention to realignment. This should be a rivalry of some sort but I can’t quite put myself at ease with WFV in the ACC and Maryland will never belong anywhere but the ACC.

UMass at Pitt 4:00pm ACCN

Pitt being favored by 35.5 feels like a trap.

Louisiana Tech at Mississippi State 4:00pm ESPNU

LaTech must be sliding backwards as a program judging by the +23 line. I got nothing else here.

Montana State at Wyoming 4:00pm ESPN+

I’m intrigued by the screaming amateurism that this game projects. I won’t actually watch it but the way it will look like a 4k remaster of a game from the 60s is appealing on a spiritual level.

Central Michigan at Missouri 4:00pm SECN

Fuck Missouri.

23 Louisiana at 21 Texas 4:30pm FOX

The line has moved heavily towards the Ragin Cajuns since it opened. Texas is still a solid favorite but there is something here that I have not been paying attention to so if you want to dig a little you might find some relatively easy money.

Northern Iowa at 7 Iowa State 4:30pm ESPN+

Iowa State, #7 in the preseason. What a weird fucking time we live in.

San Jose State at 15 USC 5:00pm P12N

Clay Helton is still the coach at USC. That’s crazy. This program has been sleepwalking through the last decade and they’re still able to pull a #15 ranking because they only have one or two teams on their schedule with a relatively equal talent level.

Gardner-Webb at Georgia Southern 6:00pm ESPN3

Campbell at Liberty 6:00pm ESPN3

Liberty’s QB is this year’s unheard of draft prospect that every self-styled draft expert/prognosticator on god’s green twitter is touting as a first round pick. I don’t have an opinion on him because I generally feel gross watching Liberty do anything.

Nicholls at Memphis 7:00pm ESPN+

Go, Tigers, go. I don’t actually have any expectations calibrated for this year’s Memphis squad. I saw Kenneth Gainwell made a 53-man roster for the Eagles and couldn’t remember him being anything other than a freshman. Time is cruel.

Missouri State at Oklahoma State 7:00pm ESPN+

If Oklahoma State can’t hit for at least 60 in this game they aren’t real and I hate them.

Monmouth at Middle Tennessee 7:00pm ESPN3

Ah, Monmouth, Monmouth! These chips are too spicy!

Texas Tech vs. Houston (in Houston, TX) 7:00pm ESPN

The future of the Big 12 is the SWC, as it always should have been. Well, I mean, aside from the SWC’s tentpole programs. Ah, fuck, it’s so weird and stupid.

Syracuse at Ohio 7:00pm CBSSN

I still love CBSSN but no thank you.

Southern at Troy 7:00pm ESPN3

Fading fast.

Oregon State at Purdue 7:00pm FS1

Fading faster.

Norfolk State at Toledo 7:00pm ESPN3

I’m evaporating.

Central Arkansas at Arkansas State 7:00pm ESPN3

Eyes are closing.

Eastern Illinois at South Carolina 7:00pm ESPN+/SECN+

Snoring softly.

Baylor at Texas State 7:00pm ESPN+

Snapping to just to talk about how evil Baylor is in general, aside from the horrifically cursed athletics department.

Akron at Auburn 7:00pm ESPN+/SECN+

Back to sleep.

Abilene Christian at SMU 7:00pm ESPN+

Snoring loudly.

5 Georgia vs. 3 Clemson (in Charlotte, NC) 7:30pm ABC

Ah, shit, here we go! It is party time! On paper this is an insanely good “opening” week matchup. But this is also the game that I most had in mind when I wrote about how kind of useless this week’s games are for the season going forward. Clemson is in the DJ Uiagalelei era now and even if he’s better long term than I suspect him of being, he’s still bound to be raw against a Georgia team that might actually have more overall talent than Clemson right now. But if he shows out he’ll be an immediate Heisman darling until he starts throwing lawn darts for a few weeks in a row. It’s fun but meaningless.

NIU at Georgia Tech 7:30pm ACCN

Trash.

Northwestern State at North Texas 7:30pm ESPN3

Crap.

UTSA at Illinois 7:30pm BTN

Garbage.

William & Mary at Virginia 7:30pm RSN/ESPN3

Funny if William & Mary wins but probably just miserable all around.

Florida Atlantic at 13 Florida 7:30pm SECN

I don’t often fall into the trap of daydreaming about mascots fighting but an owl fighting an alligator is too good to pass up. There are owls of some sort pretty much everywhere in the world so they have to cross paths in nature with a gator every so often. If you have any videos of an owl winning these fights, please share them.

Southern Miss at South Alabama 8:00pm ESPN+

Hell, yes. I can’t fully explain why this shitbox gets me a little bit excited but it does.

Kent State at 6 Texas A&M 8:00pm ESPNU

Always root against Jimbo. Don’t always bet against him but definitely always root against him.

Montana at 20 Washington 8:00pm P12N

Now this is interesting brand building to me. I don’t think there’s much here for UDub other than an expected win but Montana has been a pretty good team in I-AA over the years. If they can run closer than the +24 they’ve been given it could boost their profile quite a bit.

Duquesne at TCU 8:00pm ESPN+

I’m not falling for this one.

ETSU at Vanderbilt 8:00pm ESPN+/SECN+

Vanderbilt is a 21-point favorite and I am telling you, gentle reader, that is a mistake.

16 LSU at UCLA 8:30pm FOX

UCLA hasn’t been a top talent draw on the West Coast in the last 20 years for whatever reason. This is what I meant by USC sleepwalking. It feels like, to me, going to school in Westwood and playing home games in the Rose Bowl would be a bigger draw than University Village and the Coliseum. But maybe being able to walk to games is important to recruits. Whatever, LSU is going to fuck the Bruins up right there in the Rose Bowl so that’s not gonna help anything.

Bethune-Cookman at UTEP 9:00pm ESPN3

This is as close to a bodybag game as UTEP can get, at least where they’re the favorites, but I will say this for BCU: their uniforms are usually pretty cool.

New Mexico State at San Diego State 10:30pm CBSSN

This is that real MWC shit. Lovely to me for reasons I have not been and never will be able to articulate.

Arizona vs. BYU (in Las Vegas, NV) 10:30pm ESPN

This game is Mormon as hell. If you know any Mormon football fans then they probably have an interest in this game. Bless ‘em, nobody else will have an interest but readers of Moroni sure as hell will.

Nevada at California 10:30pm FS1

Hmm. Maybe. I doubt I can sink much time into it but I do like the overload of different dark shades of blue threads involved here if nothing else.

Utah State at Washington State 11:00pm P12N

And here we have a ton of red, depending on alternates and whatnot.

Portland State at Hawaii 11:59pm Spectrum PPV

A historic showcase for the run & shoot but I don’t know what either offense is supposed to be right now.

Sunday, September 5

9 Notre Dame at Florida State 7:30pm ABC

Notre Dame is only favored by 7. Did FSU get a huge influx of talent that I totally missed or is the line just something nice in honor of Bobby Bowden? From what I know of these two programs from last year, the Irish should be at least a 3 TD overdog. Was Ian Book really all that great? I thought he was a good QB but I am thoroughly confused by what’s driving the odds on this one.

Monday, September 6

Louisville vs. Mississippi (in Atlanta, GA) 8:00pm ESPN

Yehaw. What a weird way to close things out. Why aren’t the UGas and the Cocaine Tigers playing in this slot? The racist south is favored by 10 but, off the top of my head, I don’t think they’re actually any better than Louisville. Whatever, there’s close to a zero percent chance I even remember this game is happening.

#football #college football #Tv watch em ups #gambling #rtarl watches tv

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