#‘so you see iM NOT GONNA LET YOU STOP ME NOOOW’

[buildoblivion]

you know those posts that are like ‘what topic could you make a 5 hour video essay on lol’? yeah that’s me with the caves of androzani part three cliffhanger

[itsjusta]

March 14, 2021

(dis so long i’m sowiiii)

I slept at 12 gabii doeee and it was an okay sleep lang. issa ion like it doe issa morning palang i’m overthinking na about thingsss and i hate it gyd doe when i have no control saako thoughts because i feel so weak doeee and pathetic also :(( i’m like an idiot who keeps on worrying about things na dapat di na gani nako gina think :((( i try so hard doe to block my thoughts but its hard for me gyd doe i’m so weak gyd at controlling my thoughts and it just bothers me doe like di ko mahimutang and my heart feels heavy and it makes me sad and cry :((( huhu issa times like these i question all my decisions doe and i wish i just have no feelings na doeee cos life is unfair gyd doe hahah

this weekend issa not a good one for me doe i just hope the next days will be better because ion like to be so overwhelmed with my overthinking and my worries doeee ion wanna cry doeee 😔 aish i feel so sad for myself why am i like dis uy

i distract myself by watching anime doe but when i stop watching pd issa mubalik napd doe and its making me cry hahah issa i felt better sa hapon doeee but i saw u had a story and i had a gut feeling naman nga kamo gyd nag uban sa overnight doeee so i just viewed it and i was righttt hahah u know, my hands were shaking doeee hahah and i just broke down afteeerrr

just let me rant here pleaseee 🥺 im too shy to talk to u about dis in chat and im shy to talk to others about dis doeee im just holding it all in and dis can help me let it out doeee dont react na pleaseee :( issa times like these i question my decision to stay in ur life doeee times like these ga question gyd ko ngano i choose to not let u go :( becos i see that you’re so happy and inlove doeee hahha im happy to see you so inlove doeee you’re so effort to ur gf now and im happy cos i think you love her just as much as you loved me sauna or even more doeee but at the same time it hurts man gyd doeee it hurts so much :((( everytime i see u inlove it makes me happy and sad gyd doeee but puhon2 seeing you will just make me happy doeee i will also get there! when i see u so happy and inlove it just breaks my heart cos i know i wont ever have a chance with u again doeee 🥺 i envy u so much doeee becos u really are building a great life after our break up pero i cant even move on paaa hahah but aishhh dis not a race doe i know i will also be happy soon. but i also know not getting to talk to you will also hurt me so at times like these, ga ask gyd kog strength nga makaya nako doe. i ask the Lord and myself for strength to endure pa moments like these becos getting to talk to u and seeing u sometimes makes all of the pain worth it doeee and having someone to talk u makes me feel better doe 🥺

i also ask for strength for the next months doe becos i promise i will let go of you na gyd dayon doe. when we begin 4th year (i hope f2f na doe), i promise i’ll let go of you na doe. but please be patient with me if dili tka ma let go diretsooo doeee 🥺🥺 i know it’s gonna hurt so much for the first weeks or months but i’m setting myself free na doe. i’m also setting you free na becos i feel like i’m just affecting you and your relationship. I want you to just give your all to one girl doeee but can i stay sa now just for a few months?? 🥺 and when 4th year comes, i’ll be out of your life na okay? not totally man u still my bff and i’m gonna go to u whenever i need something or if i need a friend hahha and u can still chat me when u need anything doeee and when u need help sa acads huuuh!! when that time comes i’m gonna endure everything doeee im gonna endure all the temptations to talk to u always and i will try my best to not paramdam to u doeee 🥺 sometimes nalang!! hehe bleh u cant get rid of me completely!! i want to still kamusta u and chika2 with u from time to time doeee if das okay 🥺 kabalo jd ko lisod au doeee but i know it will become bearable ra kadugayan. and i always tell u this but pls pls pls take care of urself always and be happy even i’m not in ur life naaa (i’m still here but u know what i mean) issa im also moving on for your happiness doeee so i hope that when i let u go, u will become happier okayyy u don’t have a samok na in ur life hahah u will be free na doee 🥺

but just let me be here for a few more months okaaaay 😔 i’ll let u go na dayon. u sulit da moments that i’m still here huh bleh in 4th year i will move on na and im going away na after college u wont see me na gyd hahah u know that if dili lang gyd lisod and sakit, i will be in ur life forever doeee but we both know its just hard doeee das why i’m just giving myself a few more months of kasakit hahah i’ll still be here man gyd always uyyy but its gonna be different na gyd hahha but aish u still take a grad pic with me and lets travel soon doeee and u go to my despidida okayy and visit me abroad!! let’s still do the plans we have okay!!!! 😡

i realized drama au ko nya what if makig cut off na diay ka even before 4th year pa 💀💀 hahahhaha and i hope i will fulfill dis promise doeee but i think its gonna happen gyd cos so lisod na to commu pag face to face na doe cos u will always be wid ur gf hahaha if not pata f2f naaah mag luya nalang ko doe walay kastorya kada adlaw HAHAHAH

i hope nothing will change after u read dis doeee huhu im kulbaan to post dis cos ion want things to change nooow 🥺 i wrote the paragraphs above when i was still emotional doe now that i’ve calmed down i have less courage to do my promise to let u go 🤣 omg but i’ll do that doeee!!! i’ll stay strong when that time comes and u also okaaay i know you’re strong u will be fine without me and i think if wala nako you will feel better doeee hehe u have a lot of people with u but u know that i’ll always be ur bff!!! ❤️

also dont worry about me doe i cried everything out kanina na and i drank my meds cos nag labad ako head doeee hehe i feel lighter now but i hope i wont cry again later when i sleep or tomorrow 🤦🏻‍♀️ i hope the next days are going to be better doeee heheh

i’m happy for you, okaaay?? and i’m super superrr proud of youuu for chasing your dreams and for having new friends and for being with the people u love 🥺 right now i cant say im happy gyd doe and i know u want me to be happy but its so hard now doeee that’s why im excited for the future!!! so please just continue to be happy doeee i know letting go of you will be the hardest thing for me to do and it may take me a long time but i will do my best doe 🥺 but bleh im still gonna samok2 u erday for the next months!!!! u not gonna get rid of me pa now!!

[spacecatlvr]

Chapter 3: Take me Away or on a Date?

It's Thursday afternoon, im doing work and she's cooking dinner which is by the way our own little date in the kitchen table later. She'll be pissed when she finds out i haven't prepared the table for later. She wants to do those shitty aesthetic date pictures later but i know she'll never post it because she don't really post those type of things since it's too 'intimate' and private.

She walks up to our bedroom, i hear her slippers stomping loudly on the floor. She aggressively bust the door because she's dramatic as fuck which startled stelle and hissed at her going out in the bedroom. "You still haven't sort the shit were gonna use later." She said plainly with an annoyed tone in her voice. "Sorry im just thinking for a whilee" "About what?" "Dunno actually i was staring at the window thinking about what im supposed to write about" "Well, get up we're gonna have a fancy and nice dinner in our kitchen,baby" "Yeah yeah gimme a kiss first" "Nah you'll get it when you finish the shit you're supposed to be doing right now." "Fine,arsehole" "Mwa" she teased the kiss sound as she walks back to the kitchen.

I stood up to get the things ready to the table and set it up nicely because i know she'll be really fumming if i ever mess the table cloth. "I'm gonna get dressed. Don't come to the bedroom, 'kay." "I wanna watch." "Perv, but no it's a surprise." "You'll probably just wear another tight black dress babe" "Shudup, im not. I'm gonna wear pastel." I scoffed playfully after that and she hit me with the pillow "Ah my beloved mother earth, please don't let this be the ending yet." "Fuck you." She rolled her eyes and went to the bedroom to change.

She doesn't really wear colored clothes unless it's necessary. Though, it's not like she dresses like emo girl or something, she just really likes neutral colors because for her, it's the ones that fits her better. Of course for me, everything suits her because she's literally perfect in my eyes. I hope everyone could see what i see when i look at her. A perfect, beautiful and kind woman I've ever known. She's gonna blush and heat up like a fresh tomato if she ever hear me say this out loud. She's very cute Everytime she reacts like that.

"Baeee, you done yet? I'm starving and i know you're gonna take lots of pictures before we eat so come out nooow." I shout from the kitchen to the bedroom because she's literally taking up too many time just to prepare. "I'm gay!" She shouted back at me. I laughed loudly at that. The joke never gets old. "As if i don't already know. I have you on your-" Then she opened the door aggressively before i could finish my sentence. "Fuckin' stop im done now but please close your eyes first. I want us to see each other dressed up nicely at the same time." "Ugh okay." Then i closed my eyes but i hear her footsteps that sounds like she's wearing a stiletto. "Why the fuck are ya wearing heels, we're not even gonna go out,babe" "None of your business and you're not sure yet if we're not gonna go outside." "You're full of surprises huh?" "Always." Then she pushed me inside the bedroom but kissed me in my cheeks first.

I totally don't know what im gonna wear. She's probably wearing a nice dress or something so i don't wanna dissapoint her by wearing sleeves. Well the only option i have is to wear a blazer so im gonna wear my checkered blazer, a white polo top, a bleached jeans and a beige wedge shoes. I put on some light make up to make my face presentable and all that shit. And curled my hair a little bit.

"Love, can i come out now? I'm ready." I asked her closely to the bedroom door. "You're gay baby we both already know." She answered, i can see a smile forming on her lips. This girl i swear. "I will change again to my sweatpants i swear to god." "Don't ya dare. Come out now before bust that door open." I lightly laughed and opened the door. I saw her, sitting on the dinning room chair, swiping at her phone. She's wearing a plaid skirt that matches her blazer, a black turtleneck that i bought her last Christmas, paired with a locket necklace and a brown boots. She looks flawlessly beautiful. How the hell can she sit in there, in front of the candle lit table and the dishes she cooked, scrolling her phone and look effortlessly gorgeous?.

"What happened to 'im gonna wear pastel'?" "Think this one's better so.."She said while standing up to twirl a little bit. "Wow, we're matching." I said out loud after i head to toe stare at her. She sighs and said "Of course we're matching even though we didn't plan on this." "Guess this what soulmates do.." "Mhm, come 'ere" I walked slowly towards her and she pulled me by my waist and kissed me. I heard stelle purr in the corner. And i feel her lip forming a smile while kissing me. I will never get tired of her and this. Not in a billion years. "Let's take a photograph, babe" she said after pulling out from my grip to get our camera. "I decided to take a picture of us everytime we do something not familiar with us." "We dated others before, this isn't new.." "I meant by us together,idiot." "Just taking a piss baby." She rolled her eyes again. She's gonna make her eyes go on 360 degrees if she keep on doing that but it's cute. I sat on the chair, motioning her to sit on my lap. "How are we gonna take a picture then?" "You in my lap." "Ugh that's too sappy." "It's called sweet." "Whatever you say, girlfriend." "My god please call me that every second of our life." I seriously felt my heart pump faster than normal when she said that. My ears are honestly blessed. My whole body, my soul is.

She sat on my lap and positioned the camera on the table and set a timer. I hold her closer and smelled her hair. Smells like vanilla and cream. Then i kissed her back bone and she giggled. Ah, the music in my ears. "Okay stop sniffing and kissing me, we have to take a picture now. The food's gonna get cold." "Mkay girlfriend." I could feel her blush in the nickname. She clicked the camera at it beeped the timer. We're both smiling in the first picture. The second one was me kissing her neck and her laughing. And the third one involves an annoyed green eyed black cat named, stelle. We're all facing the camera, both of us smiling widely and stelle keeping her fierce face, nothing new. She's probably annoye that we're gonna ignore her for the rest of the night.

She stood up from sitting on my lap, her butt was warm, she's probably comfortable in the position haha. "Let's eat now, im gonna take you out in a couple of hours." "Stelle's not gonna like that." "Stelle doesn't like anything other than sleeping and us." I smiled and opened a bottle of red wine and poured a glass for both of us. I handed her, her glass and raised mine to make a toast or whatever you call it. "To a nice, fancy dinner date with the best woman in my life" I clinked our glasses together while she smiles. "And to my best friend figuring out where im gonna take them later." "Cheers to that, you're full of surprises." She stood up again to play folklore by Taylor Swift in our phonograph.

We ate in comfortable silence, making small talks and singing along to the songs. Happy. That's what we're both feeling tonight. We finished our dinner and took some minute before cleaning up the table and taking more and more pictures. The camera probably needs another film refill. She once said that pictures are the best thing ever invented because it's like framing a beautiful moment for a long time even if colors fade, the memories behind the picture doesn't. Even if the person in it or the ones who took it doesn't remember. It was part of their life.

"You ready to get the hell outta here and let your wonderful girlfriend surprise you once more?" She blurted after us taking a break. "Fuck you're gonna make me crazy and weak." I breathlessly tell her,adding "And to answer your question or offer, yes my lady." I turned off the background music and gathered both our things in our bag and made sure stelle has water in her bowl before going out in the house. She looks happy. Very happy. We held hands while she lead the way to wherever the hell she's gonna take me. She kept on giggling while we walk, it's the cutest thing on earth. Besides baby bears. "Close your eyes, we're almost there." She said while swinging our hands together. "If i close my eyes, you won't leave me alone in the street to make me look like a fool, do ya?" "Since when the hell did you not trust me!" She faked offended. "Swear meee" "I swear baby." I slowly closed my eye and tightened my grip to her hand. She guides me in front of the place.. "Open ya beautiful eyes now." I slowly opened my eyes and saw an ice cream store. I smiled widely and pecked her cheeks and then her lips.

I motioned for us to come inside. There's no more people inside other than the worker. An old lady with a smile plastered on her face. I looked at the flavor choices. She spoke to order, i think she already knows what i want. She always orders so.. "Hello madames" the worker named Jenny greeted us both, i smiled. "Hello, we'd like to have one matcha ice cream and one mint chocolate ice cream." She ordered while i stood beside her like a little kid. She then held my hand after saying our order and paying the bill. We sat on one of the chairs and waited for our order. "I knew you'd get me that flavor." "I know you like the back of my hand,baby." I chuckled at that. She really does. "I still don't know why you love matcha, it taste like grass." "Oi, i don't tolerate any matcha slander in this relationship. Take it or Leave it." She then winked. "Okay but it's true." Then there she goes. She hit me lightly in my arms. I laughed at her, she looks like a child. Jenny then came out with our orders. "You two look good together, are you guys.." Jenny asked, followed with "Don't worry, i love gay people. I'm even gay myself." "Phew, thought you were homophobic but i kinda sensed you aren't because you gave us the warmest smile when we came in." I answered. "And uh yeah, we're together. We're on a date right now and she surprised me with this." I said then licked my ice cream because it'll probably melt if i don't eat it now. "Have a nice night you two." Jenny said and gave us one last warm smile then head inside.

I opened the door for her and motioned her to go out and then i followed. We walk while holding her hand in my right hands and holding my ice cream on my left. "Is this the end of our date night,love?" I asked. "What time is it?" "It's 11:30." "Still early so..we might go to this place." She said then continued to eat her ice cream and swinging our hands in the air. There's not so many people out anymore, probably because it's late but there's still noises coming from cars.. then i saw a wishing well. "Can we go there and wish for something?" I asked her with a pouty face, i know she's gonna say yes but i still did it anyways. I probably look like a fool but. "Ugh the puppy eyes. You know I'm gonna say yes even if you don't do that." "I know but i wanna see your fake annoyed face." "You're the worst." "Hm, but you love me." She sighs dramatically. We went closer to the wishing well and i searched for a penny. Throwing one away and wished for something. She threw one as well and wished for something. "What did ya wish for?" "I'm gonna jinx it if i say it so no." 'mkay fine" It's now my turn to roll my eyes so i did. We continued to walk until we stopped by the sea side. "Is this where you're gonna take me?" I asked and she hugged me sideways and felt her nod and hum. I looked at her and i fell in love all over again.

"You know.." i said slowly. "Hm what?" She answered. "I love you. Always." Then i wrapped one of my arms to her back. She held me more tightly. "I love you too, very very much so." She stated rather than answered. We sat by the sea side and let the cool breeze hit our bodies. I feel like she's getting colder when the air blows harder so i stood up and picked her up in my back. "Hmpf, why" she grumpily said. "Let's go home. It's getting colder you know." "You're warm enough." "Yes but im gonna freeze my ass out if i keep you warm, though i'd do that if needed but still." "Okay but put me down." "No i like carrying you." "It's a long way homee, you're gonna feel like an old lady tomorrow and be grumpy again and make me make you soup and feel guilty." "We're not gonna walk back home, let's get a cab". She then nuzzled her face in my neck as i book a cab. The cab arrived 5 minutes later. We both sat at the back and i think she's tired so i let her place her head in my lap. "I'm not sleepy" she says, i just hummed in approval though i know she's tired. I played with her hair and traced some shaped on her shoulders then she's asleep.

I woke her up when we arrived. I payed and thanked the driver when we got out. She's still a little drowsy when she opened her eyes. "We're not home baby." She realized after lightly rubbing her eyes. "Yeah, one more thing to do before we end the night." I said then Locked our hands again.

We stopped by the nearest flower shop near the flat. I made her sit outside the shop. She placed her head on the cold table. She's real tired haha. I went inside the store and asked the owner their best daisy. Daisies are her favorite flower. I also noticed there are small stuffed toys they sell and i picked out a small hand sized star with a smiley face in color light blue. I payed then went out to wake her up.

"Baby let's go home for real now." Tapping her to wake up. She made a grumbly noise. Cute motherfucker. "Home's with you and stelle you know." She sheepishly smiled. I blushed at that. "You're blushing oh my god it's the first time, we gotta celebrate." Her senses then was active. "We're gonna celebrate by taking a rest at home." "Boringg." "Stelle's gonna be mad at us you know." I still have the flowers in my back. "What'd ya get for me lover?" Then i showed her the bouquet of daisies. She light up like a thousand of stars sparkling. Then she sniffed the flowers and stoop up to kiss me. She seriously kissed me and held me in my neck tight. "My favorites! Thank you baby." "It's only fair. You surprised me in many ways as possible today." I smiled at her. Oh and the stuffed star. I then handed it to her. "Stelle's gonna love this." She said "it's for you, not for her." "That's the reason why she loves me more than you." "Okay that's rude." She laughed loudly. Then held my hand tight again. I think it's gonna form a bruise later but i don't really care. "Let's go home to stella." She said.

We walked back home, which is close to the shop. Before we could go inside the flat. We saw a cat in our doorway sitting. It looks like stelle when i first saw her. It mewls when we get close to the door. While she finds the keys, i stepped closely to the cat and pets her head. God i don't think this one has a home. "You gonna come in or what?" She asks "Babe.." "Ah here we go again." "Please it looks so cute and so.." "Get it inside." I smiled widely at her and gently picked up the cat. Surprisingly it didn't get away from me so.. We went inside the house and i place the cat on the couch and i take off my blazer. Stelle came closer to us. " 'd ya think the cat have a owner? Or is it a stray." She asks, I checked what the gender of the cat is. It's a girl. "I dunno, we should go check if there's a microchip in her later morning." I said as i follow my gaze to her going inside our bedroom. She's probably gonna charge to her pj's. I stroked stelle's ears while she looks at the cat confusingly but she doesn't attack it. Neithe does the other cat.

"Baeee" my girlfriend calls me in the bedroom. So i took the white cat with me in our bedroom. I placed the cat beside her. She plays with the cat as i change into my normal clothes. After that i plopped on the bed while stelle climbs up on our side.

"I hope this cat doesn't have any owner." She said as she slowly blinks and stare at the white cat. Stelle is now sleeping on her bed. The white cat is laying on her back, probably sleeping now. "Yeah..you want her?" I asked "Hm." She's gonna doze off any minute now. I took the cat and placed her on stelle's crater so she could sleep much better. It has a bed inside so it's comfy. Then i layed in our bed and cuddled my girlfriend closer. She released a breath. "Thank you for our date today." I whispered slowly. "Mhm, we both made an effort so it's even." She mumbled. "Good night Mon Soleil" I kissed her one last time then pulled the blanket closer to us. "Goodnight love, je t'aime." She slowly says then scoots closer and i feel our breathing even out.

It was a good fancy date night with the best woman in my life.

X, cosmic ray (10/19/21)

[taiey]

The continuing adventures of “taiey writes liveblogs that probably only make sense with a transcript of the movie to line it up with”.

no peter please don't go after him

he really does get the most dramatic lines—ooh, green reflection in the window!

wow, that's. She really does ask for validation a lot of times

:((( this whole goblin kit thing is really elaborate? like, i thought you would've failed science. there is mechanical engineering. and chemical. for bombs.

That's a really, really stable spider web that is also flexible enough to support them without clinging, at that angle

[obligatory evil meteor mention]

Surprisingly evil-looking mail delivery guy! Uuunless you're her dad and you live here or. Oh, okay.

Oh, May.

But, like, no pressure or anything.

!!! her ring.

ahh evil evil scooter. of evil.

Harry this is not a good way to have an honest conversation. Stop punching your friend. No, I don't care that you're in costume, he's not, that makes it—DON'T STAB HIM!

I guess by the time your friend is yelling at you about his father, while wearing his green goblin costume and standing on his green goblin scooty-fly, it is acceptable to tell your friend his father was the green goblin, despite said father's dying request.

Dude! Attempts at vengeance on your best friend for murder of your father are NOT an excuse for massive property damage! I hope you pay for the repairs OH AND ALSO did no one get hurt by that massive shower of bricks onto a busy street??

"I'm still here! And now I have a lightsaber!"

oh no what if your new superpowers don't cover falling from heights? (I'm sure they do, I know he dies at the end of the movie.)

I wonder, again, if Peter took him out of the goblin costume first. like. awkward.

Wait, what? I thought when that guy jumped/fell out a window he died.

There's marshland in New York? With a terribly ill-secured particle physics laboratory?

OH MY GOODNESS YOU GUYS, YOU'RE TERRIBLE! you can't even check how much mass is in the reactor? How many birds with superpowers does New York have now?

Also awkward: imagine if those cops had gotten there slightly differently and fallen into the spinny thing toooo...

Go. See. Him. and hope maybe he doesn't remember you're spiderman if he doesn't remember you saved his liiiffffe  (oh, good.)

Hey, Peter, you maybe want to. idk. Tell MJ. Some relevant facts, about her friends and his father and.

yikes that's some horrifying sand movement. like. yeeesh no.

Oh... your hand cannot pick up your daughter's locket. :( —yes! go hand, reformed hand! Woohoo! :D

Hey, nice green-ing, sand. Good job. Stripy and everything.

Yeah dude no. Don't start talking about spidey now. The other stuff was kinda okay but not, well.

Okay so when there's a large metal beam swinging about nearby your window... maybe... not? with the walking towards it?

Man, what is wrong with this crane?

you did not pick a good guy to insult peter parker to, whatsyaname. eddy. Ed. idk.

“YOU TELL MY WIFE thank you.” heh. Slight, teeny, tiny, character development, I love.

He didn't see you there, I didn't see you with a camera. Where'd you get the camera from, Pete?

Ed. Shut up. He's paying you $50 for a front page shot, he does not value anything about you.

Like, that could be a conflict for Peter, ‘i could stage that and get a steady job’ buut I already know the plot of this movie and can kinda guess how Edward gets that shot.

That is an excellent Stan Lee cameo.

...how much... exactly... has harry lost of his memory... if he doesn't know he has money...

SUPER EVIL REFLEXES!!

...oh, Mary Jane.

...oh no don't you be jealous.

This'd be a really awkward parade thing if he decided to not in faaact show up oh no. Oh, no. Oh, man.

Wow, that sure is a conveniently placed "Sand & Stone" truck. Where'd you get that shovel?

Wow, bullets work surprisingly well considering he's made. of sand.

[obligatory note of happiness about the MJ&Harry bit. and. honesty.]

dude put yer mask back on

ehhhh look the thing about the humble never-asks-to-be-thanked thing is that it doesn't work when. this.

Oh my goodness he asks her? He suggests it?? Peter, no!

"No, Spider Man, no!" I relate to this kid.

like, i've seen gifs ofit, that shekissed him but i did not realise he aSKS HER TO

Yeah, same, Mary Jane!

haha but maybe this time mary jane won't be kidnapped

The sand is now driving a truck. Poorly.

Yeeeesh no, stop, no, ~sheriff~? You’re not.

tbh what if you just. Let him take the money. So much property damage going on here. So very much.

WHAT IF YOU DIDN'T KISS SOMEONE. WHILE PREPARING TO PROPOSE TO SOMEONE ELSE. WHAT. IF.

This guy... is gonna end up bringing you that ring at the worst possible moment during your inevitable argument. Isn't he. Isn't he, Peter.

You could also try telling him you got fired, MJ. He knows that feeling! Kind of.

...not that you should say that, Peter. 'cause it's kind of only kinda.

how have you not noticed how terribly your spider man/actress analogies go over. every single time.

Like in a literary sense it's kinda cool, there are parallels between their experiences, kinda... BUT NOT RIGHT nooow

shhuuuttt uppp (this is all like 5 seconds, i just keep. pausing.)

Hey, what could make Mary Jane feel worse right now? ENTER GWEN STACY.

ENTER GWEN STACY TALKING ABOUT HOW SHE KISSED SPIDERMAN

“Who kisses Spiderman?? :D” "Me. Most days. When I'm not mad at him for beiNG TERRIBLE."

I. I'm not sure. like. what the point of that question is. There is no good answer.

No. He did not, MJ. He had idea how it would make you feel, because BOY I DUNNO.

um. usher guy. no. SHE JUST LEFT, WHY WOULD YOU SEND THE CHAMpagne in anyway, whyy

Beep!

Oh, hey! I was right! That other guy did die, probably ...aand it wasn't your fault. technically.

We chased down the wrong guy?

Pfff.

Yeah so I think so far he really hasn't killed anyone. Not counting Norman or Ock on technicalities.

Does he feel guilty? About you or about... okay, don't say "I don't need you" to Mary Jane Watson. That's a bad idea.

The evil ooze has been hanging out in your bedroom for ?? weeks and it's only now that it attacks you? infects. thing.

"Hey, this was a lot quicker than last time I made a new costume."

Spiderman is just, like, an accepted traffic hazard by now, right?

Oh, I'm so glad he's being suspicious of the black goop.

...you're not a biologist, but you can recognise a symbiote on a molecular level in minutes when it's AN ALIEN.

dude please realise you look super evil now. even to —haha like you shouldn't smash people's cameras but also haha

"Little did Spiderman know, I have TWO cameras!"

OK I'll admit the black is legitimately good for hiding on dark ceilings

TRAIN ASSISTED WEB KICK!

oh gosh the body horror from this sand thing—hope that pipe wasn't important--ooh, water works.

...also hope this large tank of pressurised water isn't important and won't flood annnything else.

EVIL HAIR-PULLING-DOWN

...that's... kinda a valid point? but. I mean sure, he should fix the door, probably, just not being polite

Hey, Peter, you made a good decision! Nice! AND STAY OFF.

Aunt May isn't having any of this "murder can be good" stuff.

revenge == the symbiote ??

Waitress/Singer is a job? ...also maybe you should tell your boyfriend about thi—Harry paints? Cool!

(Does Harry know that MJ's dating Peter?)

Yell at people and they offer you oranges?

Hee Ursula! :D

He also cooks! And they dance!

M. J. Do not. Noooooo whyy

oh no. noo. different no. :((( no. Please, Harry. Keep your eyes off 'the ball' and ahhh—hey, there's that scene that wasn't in the VHS version.

Harry?? This is like 20% of the reason you wear a mask, dude!

whiiiplaaash oh my goodness ahh poor Mary Jane.

:((( see this is the kind of quality anguish you can get when you don't just discriminately kidnap, other supervillains take note

pete. pete. pe ter par ker. "I'm breaking up with you" is not. in fact. a good segue to "Let's get married"

Took them three movies but they finally made acting plot relevant. It's not! that hard!

AND THEN. YOU GO BACK TO PETER. AND PRETEND TO BE HIS AMNESIAC BEST FRIEND oh my goodness and then you use her omitive lie about the shoW AND THEN WE GO FULL SM1

“but. but she broke up with *you*, because she was in love with *me*. !!”

what. Why are. you winking?

Bright green coffee sign!

nooo. emotional anguish---->TERRIBLE LIFE CHOICES

Right, Harry, overall—because I mean high marks for ingenuity and not-kidnapping, but—you're really lacking on the follow through here, like for keeping up the act. And wow that is a lot alcohol in front of you.

Harry please notice the ominous black spidey suit. Please. Soon.

harry im not sure you've noticed but you have blades. on. ur arm.

Takes symbiote!Pete to point out the obvious: that Norman.didn't.deserve you.

Kinda funny how after all that the picture in question is not, in fact, of Peter actually doing anything wrong.

OH MY GOODNESS, IT'S PHOTOSHOPPED? IT'S not even actually symby-spidey?

Yeah, no, Ed. I can forgive a lot of things. But reposts with the watermarks edited out? Not that.

hahahah

Symby-Pete likes Ursula's food?   . . .ah

*hair flick*

water doesn't kill him forever. :o

OH MAN PETER NO.

symbiote-Pete spends money recklessly.

Oh man, Gwen is so nice.

...alien meteor ooze teaches you to play jazz piano? ...and dance?

blonde hair and the black headband and their clothes and his hair and her earrings... it's a Look.

GWEN STACY IS SO NICE! ("That was all for her? I'm so sorry.")

NO.

get. out.

geddoouutt

"Who are you?" "Well, Mary Jane, I reckon I'm the exact feeling of a church spire silhouetted against the storm clouds, as lightning crashes in the background."

okay so eddy, brocky, rock boy. don't pray to God to kill people. Don't... don't do that.

How. Exactly. Do you recognise the face of a guy you barely know, four floors up, while he's tearing an alien ooze suit off his skin.

oh no his hair's still black

Continuing adventures of That Awful Door.

I hope Aunt May knows he's Spider man, because otherwise there is just waaay too much backstory to explain here.

I think she also wants him to keep the ring so she doesn't have to wear it.

“Spiderman... didn't have those teeth last time... right?”

Maybe not? with the watching her through her window? Also considering last time your saw her in person you hit her maybe not do that first part in person, perhaps.

"On Broad-way."

...you also locked the normal one away? Or, no, that was earlier this night. You just were using the evil one, and stowed that away. ok. gotcha.

Harry! Harry, you could do. a good. ...oh no. peter don't come also what happened to his face??

:(((

OH MAN. BERNARD! i don't think this is gonna work. but. thank you. for. saying that. [it worked!:D]

what happened to your face do you still have superpowers if you're not healing.

It's the real spiderman! He stopped in front of an american flag for a sec!

this reporter overuses the word 'seemed'

Brick!

you're stiiilll fallling

Listen MJ most of the webbing is really strong, you can actually move along it and even if you fall through one level you've got a decent chance of catching the next.

this reporter is so alarmist. and that one.

Goblin bomb!

"I'm not here for you~"

Burn it & smash it! :D

That kid is awesome! ("Film's extra.")

or. you could. shoot web. and not. jump. And maybe get her down somehow? Ground level would be... safer... lotta floors, elevators proabably not working...

why did that work?

ohh. noise.

oh... kay...

[tragic backstories make everything better]

i f o r g i v e y o u .. ..

i like to think he becomes also a superhero. subtler. smaller. never quite noticed, but. bit by bit.

why in the world is gwen at harry's funeral

(mj you do in fact have a job. and. a song to finish singing. um. but anyway)

"Girl at the final battle" yes. Her. Excellent.

The credit songs this time are so... gentle...

(Balance of probabilities Harry died intestate but maybe he drew up a will at some point when he liked Peter and didn’t revoke it and then they can go help Marko’s daughter, perhaps? Maybe.)

[qtlitoang3l]

2018 .

another year down .. it went by very fast didnt it ? time is going by even faster .

2017 was a year full of roller coasters .. a lot of ups , but equally as many downs . i usually reflect my year in Dec/Jan so here it goes . January: I started school again . BIG step , considering i was out for 2 years before then . i remember how excited yet nervous i was . im so glad i did it . It was also the month that my good friend from high school , Brandon , told me that he was getting deployed (he’s in the army) in Feb . i was scared , but all i could do was pray for him to come back home alive . he came back home last month (Dec 2017) safe and sound . i thanked God for watching over him . unfortunately , a few days later , my dad got a heart attack .. now THAT was the scariest moment of my life . i still remember that day very clearly . it haunts me every time . ill never forget the sight of my dad holding his chest , sliding down the couch , and grabbed my hand for his life , grasping for breathe . after 3 days being in the hospital , he was discharged with meds and a new plan for his diet . my mom was by herself at work so my siblings and i had to go out to help while my dad was in the hospital . i knew how scared she gets when shes by herself . my dad and i werent on good terms for a year until this moment happened . i guess we both realized that life is so short and that anything could happen in a second . more importantly , im so glad he’s okay til this day . On a happier note , that was also the month that i purchased my first firearm ! so bad ass right ? The beginning of the year was rough , but it got better ! February: Had dinner with Brandon and Aimee b4 he got deployed . Again , i prayed for his safety . I went to a concert (william singe and alex aiono) , which was so fun . Not much happened that month . Had a valentine’s day dinner with the girls and with an old friend . 

March: this month was important because thats when i found that my sister was having a boy!! amazing news right ? and i could finally be an aunt ! I also watched the Lion King on broadway . i think thats a pretty cool thing to mention , right ? it was such a good show !

April: Finals month ... ugh . also my bday month .. didnt do anything cuz all my finals were on the week of my bday . Got my car fixed that month too after that bad car accident . ugh . May: went to a friend’s dowry , did my first 5K bubble run , went to a house warming party , picked up my mom from her 2 week vacation . she deserved it . Did i mention it was the first semester that i start a nursing course ? nerve-wracking!! 

June: My sister’s baby shower . SO FUN ! i decorated everything and bought this beautiful cake . everything was obviously blue :) i also remember having A LOT of exams back to back . not fun at all .

July: My nephew was born .. it was the best day ever . it changed my life . i am an auntie !! he made everyone so happy and everyone was so happy to see him . it was nice to see my whole family together and happy . I also went to a really fun wedding that month . 

August: After a brutal semester and final , I WENT TO LA !! its been forever since ive been on vacation !! i prefer to go with friends , but i went with my siblings . ups and down on that trip and wouldnt wanna travel again with them unless my parents were there . lesson learned and long story . still have pictures that i havent posted from that trip !

September: went to birthday dinners , a wedding , apartment warmings , a “bachelor” party (lol) and started school again . This was also the month that one of the doctors at DH passed away from breast cancer . it was a very gloomy time for my coworkers . i wasnt at work when everyone found out , but ive heard about it . everyone didnt want to work . the atmosphere completely changed . I went to her funeral , but only the beginning part . instead of being sad , we celebrated her life as a doctor and her passion for her career . it was a sad time and the world lost such a talented person . RIP Dr. Stanfield. at the end of the month my friend dan got married at city hall , which was everything he wanted . didnt have to spend a lot of money at all ! October: My friend threw a huge house party for his birthday . parties are not like they use to be . but because most of the ppl there were older , there wasnt much drinking or playing games , which was the sucky part . no one really wanted to do anything . not sure why , but it is what it is . Also did a photoshoot that month , which i havent done in a long time . forgot how much fun it was .

November: Ughhhh drama month out of all the other months , only because this girl is totally obsessed with her ex and hes literally the only thing she talks about . basically we went to the club and she KNEW he was gonna be there yet she decided to come with us . okay . she sees him , starts freaking out , gets all dramatic like “OMG he totally saw me” type of dramatic . it actually went as far as “i could get him kicked out RIGHT NOW if i wanted . i KNOW the bouncers here , dont test me” yeup .. DRAMA . it was entertaining at the same time . my mistake was that she could handle herself . no , she was totally sloppy and even fell.. in front of her ex .. nbd -.- GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER . i stopped hanging out with her .. i couldnt handle it the negative vibes . she came to the thanksgiving party the week after and of course she brought that weekend back and started venting about how she saw her ex and shit . i honestly didnt care . Anyways , thanksgiving with the sister’s in laws was alright . there was some questionable food that i had no idea what the mom was cooking though .. it was some weird things .

December: went to a holiday party , met and saw some friends . it was a good time ! that was also the month that i thought i was gonna fail but ended up passing in the end . THANK GOD . the whole week after the final , i literally went out every day to go drink . you can tell how much stress i was under . lol . i noticed that i was getting a cough , so i cooled down on the drinking after that week . figured i should take care of myself right ? i watched a cirque du soleil show . fantastic as usual . My friend duy asked me to part of this pageant because there was not enough girls .. hmm ... well i didnt wanna just compete because there werent a lot of girls .. so he sat me down and literally gave me a power point show as to why i should join . LOL . i appreciated the time and effort , so id do it for a friend in need . it’ll be fun ! maybe not intense as miss massachusetts but it’ll be a good experience . a big accomplishment that month was when i went snowboarding for the first time in my life !! omg it was so much more fun that i thought it was ! i was hesitant to go because my student that passed away from a snowboarding accident (RIP) , but i couldnt be afraid forever .. it was for him :)

And nooow .. we are in January !! crazy how much has happened in a year .. my resolution this year , besides spending time with my brother , is be more carefree and not care what other ppl think . i think i need to focus on being happy instead of trying to please others . i was told by someone .. that i should be myself more and ppl will see how fun/funny i am . haha , maybe i should ! i will def try . ive kept my guard up for a long time around a lot of ppl and i know ill regret it 50 years from now when im old . im gonna wish i was myself more .

as for you .. yes you .. you know exactly who you are .. i left a section specifically for you . its been a while .. a long while actually . you may or may not still read my .. “journal” .. i might just be writing this for no one to read and now one will ever see , but i guess ill never know . and its okay . even though youre not here anymore and you may not ever be anymore , im living my life the best way that i can , going through life like i never knew you . has it been hard ? yes . am i forgetting our memories ? .. i might have .. i mightve even forgotten what you look like . i dont go on your social media and you are prob doing the same . i think of you from time and time , but not in the way that you think . in a way that i hope you are doing well and only sending you positive vibes . i still pray for you and ask you to be watched over . anyways . i know youre mad .. and i understand . you’ll always have a hold of me .. but eventually .. i have to let that go .. or at least i have to learn how to . i miss our friendship , but i guess if i care about you that much .. i cant be selfish anymore . and i promise that after this , i wont be writing about you anymore .. it’ll all just disappear eventually .. my wish to you is to find happiness . i hope you can promise me that .. take care of yourself .