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mothiir · 3 months ago

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penance

the black templars discover human women. Nothing nsfw, only vaguely lewd, with canon typical violence and religious themes. Possibly will follow up with a smut if the spirit moves me

alternative summary: where is this strumpet so I might detest her with my own eyes

—

Isaiah takes his helm off to inhale the sweet scent of battlefield smoke. The sky is ruddy with dawn, and the last of the heretic cities is nothing more than smouldering rubble, the would-be rebels against the Emperor’s Will either dead or soon to be. Those too young, or too elderly, to have served a meaningful part in the uprising may yet find redemption as Chapter serfs or servitors — after all, there is little point to justice if there is no mercy to go alongside it.

Sweat gilds his high cheekbones, and drips down his nape. Taking a moment away from his brothers to say his private prayer of thanks to the Emperor is one of the small ways Isaiah keeps his sanity during these long campaigns. He would fight and die beside his brethren with pride — and yet if he has to hear one more of Reuben’s jokes, he may consider —

No. No, none of that, not even in the privacy of his own head: he must be grateful, always. Mindful and grateful of the Emperor’s blessings. Reuben is a blessing. A hardship, yes, but so often blessings take the form of hardships; of lessons to learn. Reuben is an excellent soldier, and an exercise in patience.

Perhaps it is the thought of Reuben’s damned puns that drives him further than usual, or the desire to admire the sight of a battle hard-fought. Either way, Isaiah ends up a good five hundred feet from camp before he quite realises it, crunching over charred bones and burned, unrecognisable standards.

Then: a sound. Thin, high, and vaguely organic. At once, he replaces his helmet, Captain Ezra’s words echoing in his memory: boy, there is no point prancing around like the main character in a holo — the enemy does not need to see your pretty face, and nor do I.

Anyway. The noise. His scanners alert him to a life form, hidden behind a pile of corpses. Humanoid. Rabbit-hearted, and trying very hard to remain unseen.

He upholsters his bolter, and stalks forwards: a faceless, merciless instrument of the Emperor’s wrath.

—

The clouds hang thick and red, like they have absorbed all the blood spilt today, and the heat is oppressive. A thunderstorm is coming; you taste it in the air. Soon, the rain will extinguish the last of the flaming rubble on this planet you once called home. It will fill the empty eye sockets of those who died for the delusions of your rulers. It will wash the land clean.

And you doubt you will see it.

As the Templar yanked you from the rubble, your shoulder had popped from its socket with a sick, wet crack; you had only kept yourself from crying out by biting into your tongue. Now your right arm hangs useless by your side, radiating bright veins of sheer agony. You daren’t make a move to cradle it, to ease your discomfort.

“Your world is guilty of the crime of sedition,” intones the Templar, his voice as final as a tombstone falling into place. “Your leaders rebelled against the Divinity of the Emperor, and —“

”And I should die for it,” you manage, through lips gummed together with dried saliva and ash. “Because we let it happen.”

He pauses. The subtle tilt of his helm could be curiousity; could be an invitation to continue; could be nothing at all. But you are not dead. Not yet. Something in your chest is kindled, and you remember when you were little, at a school now nothing but ash, how your teacher would complain: that girl, she always has something to say.

“We let it happen,” you continue, not sure if you are arguing for your life or begging for martyrdom. “We saw the upper echelons turn to Ch — the accursed powers.” Thou shalt not speak the name of the beast, you remember reading somewhere, lest thou invite it in to feast. “And we did not stop them. We worked away, heads bent and faces averted, and we obeyed orders, and the rot spread and ruined our world. I — I thank you, for your cleansing fire, for your — for His mercy. For bringing the Light of the Emperor to this place.”

You cannot curtesy, not in this shape, and so you drop straight to the ground, knees smacking into hard stone. You bare your nape, awaiting judgement, awaiting the blade, your heart singing against your ribs, that desperate song, that too-late plea: oh I want to live. Emperor above, let me live.

—

“That is a woman,” says Reuben, like he has never seen one before.

”Yes, Reuben, that is a woman.”

“In our dormitory.”

”Yes,” Isaiah says. ”She is in our dormitory.”

As this world lacks any proper infrastructure — due to the intensive bombing campaign needed to bring it back to the Emperor’s Grace — the Astartes have retired to their battle barge, as Marshal Ezra Rothenberg plans their next movements.

Isaiah is honoured to consider himself part of the Edessan Crusade. There are more than two thousand of his brothers dedicated to the continued extirpation of Chaos from the Edessan system: a task that was predicted to take ten solar years, and yet is proceeding far ahead of schedule — due, in no small part, to the enthusiastic participation of the new recruits Guilliman so kindly provided them. If Guilliman hoped that the Primaris Marines would take the edge off the Black Templar’s well-known zealotry, he was swiftly disappointed. Within a few days of arriving, the only way to differentiate between the new recruits and their more seasoned brothers was size.

Isaiah shares a barren dorm with Reuben, and three other brothers. They sleep on plain metal bunks, with a rough woollen blanket and a thin pillow. Other Chapters, Isiaiah has heard, are so decadent and spoiled as to have duvets — which are sacks of feathers — and sometimes even something called a mattress? Absurd. He pities his fellow Primaris Marines, shipped out to such degeneracy. He hopes that they can cultivate an appropriate sense of duty and decorum in the older generation. How can anyone value such petty things as comfort when the Emperor’s enemies still draw breath?

You are sitting on Isaiah’s bed, the blanket around your shoulders, your eyes wide. You have not spoken since he brought you here — barely whimpered when he popped your shoulder back into place.

“…what is her purpose here?” Reuben says. He sits on his own bunk, opposite Isaiah, his afternoon reading (a hagiography of one of the more exciting saints) sprawled forgotten on his lap.

“Chapter serf,” says Isaiah.

“Do we need more serfs?”

”Yes. We do. The ones we have are — uh —very devout — “

The pair grimace. The fact that the serfs spend so long in prayer is to be admired, but it doesn’t often leave them much time to perform their duties. Isaiah is sick of doing his own mending because Serf Osric and Serf Jean are once more faint from fasting and all-night vigils to the glory of the Emperor.

“Did the Marshal allocate her to you?”

Isaiah pulls an interesting series of expressions. ”Not…exactly,” he allows, unwilling to lie, and yet not wanting to admit the truth. “But he has been…busy, of late.”

”Yes. Busy. With crusading against the Emperor’s enemies.”

”Too busy to be concerned with this sort of thing,” Isaiah says, hesitantly, dangling the bait before Reuben, waiting for him to take it. Reuben leans forwards to better observe you. Isaiah feels a strange twist of pride when you don’t cringe from his regard, but meet his dark eyes with your own, your chin tipped up, your fingers curling into the blanket. Then you suddenly seem to remember who you are, and where you are, and drop your head in supplication.

“Yes,” Reuben says, slowly. “Far too busy to be concerned with this. Don’t want to bother him.”

Isaiah utters a fervent prayer of thanks to the Emperor, feeling only a little guilty at thanking Him for his brother’s aid in deceiving their Marshal. But it wasn’t really deception, was it? They weren’t lying to him at all — they just weren’t telling him! Completely different.

“Exactly! It’s beneath his concern.”

”She’s beneath his concern!”

In total accord, both Templars grin at each other, before hurriedly smoothing their faces into expressions of solemn piety.

“Yes, brother. I am glad that the Emperor has seen fit to deliver unto us a — hang on, can you sew?” Reuben says, addressing you directly. You glance up at Isaiah, then stammer:

“Y-yes my lord —“

“Excellent.”

Reuben kicks up and off his bunk, rummages in the steel box that contains all his worldly possessions, then throws a wad of fabric at you. It unfurls into a dozen pairs of socks that look very much worse for wear.

“Start with those. Then my tunic needs restitching — the Emperor’s Most Holy Iconography is starting to get a bit tattered. Then —“

”Brother Reuben, you cannot hog the new serf —“

”I am offering her the chance to redeem the sins of her forefathers and mothers with holy labour.“

“Well, yes,” Isaiah protests. “But the holy labour cannot just be confined to your menial tasks—“

”Why — do you have menial tasks that need attending to?”

”Yes!” Isaiah says, thinking of his own increasing pile of ragged undergarments. “You can mend Brother Reuben’s socks, and then you must attend to my laundry —“

”And then she can mend my tunic —“

”No, then she must pray,” Isaiah says, belatedly remembering the importance of even the most lowly baselines in adding their voices to the Emperor’s endless praises. “And attend chapel —“

”Where Marshal Ezra may behold her?” Brother Reuben says. “The serf that we do not strictly speaking have, as she has not been allocated to us?”

Ah. Yes. He had forgotten about that.

”She must pray while she works,” Isiaih amends. “And abase herself before the Emperor’s mercy.”

”Yes. But pray quietly.”

”Do you know the appropriate psalms to recite while conducting your redemptive labour?” Isaiah says. You chew your lip.

“The correct litanies while uh…mending the socks of the Emperor’s chosen may have not been included in my education,” you say. Isaiah sighs. Truly, you came from a blighted world.

“You will learn them,” he says. “The Emperor will guide your tongue. If you fail to learn them then it is a sign that you have not received His Grace, and in that case fear not — we will deliver unto you the Emperor’s Mercy.”

“She will learn them,” Brother Reuben says, with a fervent and touching belief in humanity’s dedication to the Emperor.

Or, perhaps, a fervent desire to have socks without holes in them.

—

And so it goes. The Emperor sees fit to decree that the brothers that share Reuben and Isaiah’s quarters remain on the planet to build a chapter monastery there, taking advantage of the natural resources that are now free for use. No new brothers are installed in the dormitory — a great shame, of course, but it does have the benefit of ensuring that Brother Reuben and Isiaiah do not have to face awkward questions about your presence.

Isiaiah has never been in close contact with baseline humans before, save the serfs aboard the fleet, and he knows that it is his duty to ensure that you are free of Chaos’s taint, and suitably devoted to the God Emperor. As such, he ensures that you have the appropriate reading material, and tests you to ensure that you can recite the benedictions. The first time you stumbled over an incorrect word, he had sighed deeply and sorrowfully, reaching for his bolter. Brother Reuben had dragged him to the side and explained — in hurried whispers — that humans do not have the same eidetic memory as Astartes, and the misstep was not indicative of a lapse in faith but simply a sign of your humanity.

Fascinating.

There are other baseline issues that surprise both brothers. They sleep perfectly well on their hard metal bed frames, and their serfs often deliberately braid thistles into their blankets in order to better scourge their flesh for the sin of being mortal. You, however, suffer greatly for the first few days. You end up with deep purple shadows beneath your eyes, and you wince when performing even the simplest of tasks.

“I am sorry my lords,” you stammer, when Isaiah confronts you on your constant yawning. “It is just — I am cursed to be a woman, and thus I do not have the fortitude that you have, and my body is frail and weak and cannot find rest in the blessed conditions that you enjoy.”

Reuben magnanimously permits you the use of a blanket and two of the pillows left by his brothers. Isaiah thinks that pandering to your body’s frailty could well be slowing your path to redemption, but he bows to his brother’s greater knowledge.

He is perturbed by how much you rest — as much as six hours a night, if you are permitted to sleep continuously. Once again, Reuben explains that this is normal for the baselines. Besides, if Isaiah wants devout serfs, he is more than welcome to once more entrust his care to Osric and Jean.

Isaiah stops questioning your rest hours swiftly. He does not want to go back to the days of having to convince a flagellant to polish his pauldrons. Without the brothers seeking them out, the old serfs seem happy to spend most of their time in the chapel, or wandering the halls while caning themselves and loudly declaring the Emperor’s benevolence to all.

Yes, Isaiah wants to say, we know He is very benevolent and very merciful. He also wants you to do your damn jobs.

The first real challenge occurs ten days into your time aboard the barge. You drop to your knees before Isaiah, assuming the penitential crouch you always take on when you address either of them. The sight of you prostrate at his feet — spine a neat curve, head bowed, hands clasped — always makes Isaiah’s stomach warm and twist. He enjoys seeing you so keen to atone, so eager to please the Emperor, and to receive His mercy.

“My lords, I humbly beg your permission to take a moment to clean myself — I have not managed to do so since leaving my accursed planet, and I fear that I dishonour your presence by performing my duties while unwashed.”

”You have washed yourself,” Isaiah says, frowning. He’s seen you wipe your face and underarms with a wet rag, and you wash your hands every time you go to the bathroom (a sensitive experience for all concerned, given that one of them has to escort you to the nearest convenience, and the other has to stand watch to ensure no one sees you).

”Yes, but — a shower, my lords, that is what I am asking for.”

Isaiah sniffs the air thoughtfully. True, you do smell a little sourer than you did previously, but he has lived with far more odiferous people; Brother Reuben during his ‘bathing too frequently is decadent and an offence to the Emperor’ phase for one.

(That particular penitence had been ended when Marshal Ezra had thrown Reuben bodily into the icy plunge pool and announced to all that the Emperor suffered enough on His golden throne — the Templars did not need to add their stench to the tribulations He endured.)

”Humans require more maintenance than Astartes,” Reuben allows. “It cannot hurt to permit her to bathe.”

Still, they do not want to risk taking you to one of the communal showers, nor do they want to send you off to the serf quarters. Several of their brothers are already suspicious of their suddenly-improved attire, and the last thing either of them want is to face questions about your presence — or, worse still, a request to share. So Isaiah fetches a large copper tub used by the medicae for those too unwell to stand upright to bathe, and fills it with water, and Brother Reuben donates one of his scraps of yellow soap.

“Th-thank you my lords,” you say, from your usual prostrate position; then you stand, a little unsure, eyeing them almost expectantly. The tub is set in the middle of the dormitory; Reuben is reading one of his favourite scriptures, while Isiaiah tends to his bolter. ”Uh — is it okay if I —“

You gesture at your smock. Isiaiah blinks at you.

“Are you asking permission to bathe? I have said that you may — do not waste my time with needless questions.”

He turns back to his bolter, wiping the sacred oils onto the stock, murmuring the appropriate incantations to appease the machine spirit within. A flurry of fabric; a splash; a pained squeal.

“This water is ice,” you yell, and Isaiah, startled, looks up.

His hand remains looped around the bolter, polishing up and down, up and down — but he finds he cannot tear his gaze from you. The water comes up to your waist, but the rest of you is bare, your flesh goosepimpled from the cold, your arms clutching your torso. Your elbows press under your breasts, pushing them up, where they glisten under the harsh dorm lighting. As you shiver, one nipple flashes.

Brother Reuben stares as well.

“Emperor preserve me,” he mutters, and Isaiah comes to his senses, turning his eyes aside.

“Woman!” he says, sounding only a little strangled. “Cover yourself!”

Another splash. When Isaiah peeks up — just to check that you have ceased to offend the Emperor with your naked bosom — he is gratified to see that you are neck deep in water.

”S-sorry my lords,” you say, teeth chattering.

”You are a Chapter Serf of the Black Templars,” Isiaha says hotly, his grasp tightening on the bolter, his strokes growing surer and stronger, seeking solace in the familiar rhythm. “You must act in a way that is fitting for your station! Do not flaunt yourself so! You must conduct yourself with - with decorum, and modesty. Be demure! Mindful!”

Isaiah, a little breathless after his holy vitriol, looks to Brother Reuben for moral support. Reuben is looking fixedly at his book.

“I saw nothing,” says the other Templar. “I am blind to that which does not beatify the Emperor Himself. The nudity of a serf has no bearing on my day’s prayer. It is as insignificant as the passage of a beetle along the floor.”

”Is that why you are reading your scripture upside down?”

Reuben does not look up, even as he turns the book the right way around.

“Brother Isaiah, if you polish that gun any harder it is liable to blast a hole in the wall.”

”It is not loaded, Brother Reuben,” Isaiah snaps. “I am conducting my daily worship to the Machine Spirit.”

”Is that what you call it?” Reuben mutters, and Isaiah elects to ignore him.

—

“Where did you obtain the uniform for her?” Isaiah says, the next day, his voice hushed. It is just after morning prayer-drills, and the pair are walking back to their dormitory to change, before their lunchtime prayer-drills.

”I — just from the other serf’s laundry,” says Reuben, casting a quick look around. The halls of the battle barge are more akin to that of a cathedral than a space-ship, with huge domed ceilings, and statues placed at regular intervals in well-lit alcoves. Isaiah normally takes great comfort in the stern regard of his immortalised forebears, but for some reason today he feels their gaze like a brand, like he is a neophyte and they are watching him commit some secret and terrible sin.

“They do not fit her,” Isaiah says. Reuben frowns.

“What do you mean?”

”I mean — “ Isaiah pauses for a moment, struggling to find the words. Emperor grant him Reuben’s lack of observational skills — truly, his brother is a sterling example of blind faith. “I mean…this morning. When she bent over to pick up the scripture. Her skirt. It — moved in a way that displayed her rump in a way that is most unbecoming to a serf.”

Reuben exhales, his jaw ticking minutely. “Oh? I did not notice. I do not make a habit of looking at the serf’s rear end.”

”I was not looking at her rear end!” Isaiah whisper-shouts. “It was…just there. Wiggling.”

”Wiggling?”

”Yes, wiggling.”

”Is our serf distracting you from your duties, Brother Isaiah?” Reuben says, in a tone of concern so genuine it feels like mockery.

“No! I just — it would bring shame upon our crusade if our serfs are not modestly attired.”

”I quite agree. However, I would argue that our serf is very well attired. Covered up almost to the throat.”

”Almost,” Isaiah says. “When she bends over to wash her face in the morning, if you stand at the incorrect place in the dormitory, and you have the misfortune to be looking for a book on the other side of the room, and then you find yourself looking downwards at the incorrect moment so you may observe the flagstones, you will be cursed with a view straight down her sleeping smock — and you will see both her breasts, exposed quite fully! It is revolting. A blight upon the Emperor.”

”How hideous! We must of course remedy this at once.”

”At once.”

”However,” says Reuben, as they round a corner, approaching their dormitory. “In order for me to avoid benighting mine eyes with such a distasteful view, I would much appreciate it if next time the serf washes her face you were to demonstrate the precise angle that I should avoid standing at. For I only wish to see what is pure and just in the eyes of the Emperor, and in order to do so we must have a full understanding of where to avoid looking.”

Isaiah pauses for a moment. After all, is it not his duty to guide his brothers when they seek to avoid sin? “Yes,” he says. “I will ensure that I show you most where you must not stand, and where to avoid casting your eyes. And — if I may make a suggestion?”

”Of course, brother Isaiah.”

”Perhaps it is not the uniform. Perhaps it is the way the serf has learned to stand and bend. Coming as she does from such a depraved world, riddled with heresy, it is natural that she does not know the right and proper way for a servant of the Emperor to move. Perhaps we should ask her to bend over a few times for us, and thus we can best advise her on how to avoid unnecessary…wiggling.”

Reuben grins at the thought of guiding a sinner onto the path of the righteous. “Yes, brother Isaiah. I do believe we should.”

#Black templars/reader #moth writes #my writing

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moth--blood · 1 year ago

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Obey Me × MC with chronic migraines

[ ft. the 7 brothers (seperate), Diavolo, Barbatos ]

cws: fluff mostly, brief nsfw ref with Asmo

Lucifer

the most consistent of the brothers with getting your meds and not panicking, more importantly

he tends to get small headaches from overworking, so he offers his meatheads to make you feel better if you don't have any practical ones ("no, im not letting you chug a gallon of chocolate milk thats not going to help. ..what do you MEAN thats worked before???")

insists on you laying down and resting in his room until you feel better. doesn't matter how often it is, he always makes you stop whatever you're doing to go rest

will play his softer records while you sleep in hopes it'll help the migraine go away faster

Mammon

panics, first and foremost.

are you broken? dying? humans are fragile MC don't laugh at him he's WORRIED

especially worried if you describe the pain as stabbing. for a second he genuinely thinks you're being stabbed by some Witch's voodoo doll of you. that concern never fully leaves

his worry turns to pampering when he's realized you're not, in fact, being stabbed through a doll, and now he's full of questions

will suggest anything and everything he can think of to help you, from the lights to kisses. doesn't matter he WILL try it

Levi

in awe you came to him about being in pain before anything else

awkwardly offers to let you sleep in his tub, and to get you meds or something else you might ask for

if the lights in Henry's tank bother you he'll put blankets over the tub so you don't have to look at them so directly

if physical contact helps and you ask him to lay with you he will lose his fucking mind. he'll do it but he'll be stiff as shit for several minutes before finally relaxing

offers to read his/your favorite manga to you if the noise wont be a bother

surprisingly really fucking clingy when you're so reliant on him. it makes him feel special

will play the lofi or quiet anime music that helps him sleep if the noise won't bother you. he figures if it helps him sleep it might help you not be in pain :)

Satan

also in awe you chose to come to him with this, especially if it's NB!Satan. he takes less time to process than Levi though

makes a big show of tucking you into his bed to rest, offers to get you tea and to read to you if the noise isn't an issue

if lights are a trigger dont even worry about it his room is dark as fuck!

he pampers you a bit less than Mammon does, but he still insists on getting you things and doing stuff for you.

takes very quick notice of your triggers, and does his best to help you avoid them!

zero hesitation will yell at the others for possibly accidentally causing another attack he gets protective quick.

Asmo

immediate pampering he doesn't need to be told twice

"oh, you don't feel good? here let me take care of EVERYTHING today don't even worry about it"

if scents are a trigger and his soaps or perfumes/colognes get a migraine going he will not stop apologizing. he feels AWFUL

dims all his lights and does his best to neutralize all the smells in his room, insisting you stay and let him take care of you

will also try everything he can think of, or at least suggest it

he's not the biggest fan of the idea of doing stuff to you while you're in pain but if that helps you he'll try it. but you gotta tell him the second it starts getting worse because the pampering will continue exactly where it left off

Beel

he's so worried :(

also lowkey thinks you're dying so he's extra careful with you.

will do anything you ask bro is at your beck and call when you don't feel good

akin to everyone else he'll bring up anything he can think of that might help

more than willing to cuddle you into feeling better if you ask.

gets Lucifer to bring you meds because he doesn't wanna leave you alone, and if you're not the biggest fan of taking them he'll stare at you with the biggest puppy eyes until you do

Belphie

pulls you upstairs to the attic and insists on you sleeping it off, even if that doesn't always work

a big cuddler so he doesn't mind holding you if physical contact helps

goes and gets you medicine and a drink without even being asked, and if you question or tease him about it he'll just mutter something about wanting to sleep in peace without you complaining about your head

he's just worried don't let him fool you again

very observant with your triggers and when you're around bright lights or loud noises, for example, too long he'll pull you aside and quietly ask if you're still feeling okay. if it's a yes he'll pretend he never asked and if it's a no, he'll pull you back to the attic pft

Diavolo

also thinks you're dying at first. i mean, for all he knew you were! Solomon hardly counts as human so imagine his absolute panic when his first actual human starts complaining of excessive brain pain. several times.

after you've been around a while though, he's super calm about it

words cannot express how quickly he goes "oh okay! here, drugs"

does keep your medicine on him basically constantly, just in case!

takes you to his room or to an unused room in RAD so you can rest for a little bit, and if it's bad enough at RAD he'll just fucking leave to take you home lmao

doesn't fully understand still, but he's doing his best! it's the thought that counts even if he's unknowingly making it just a little worse </3

Barbatos

also keeps your medicine on his person after a while.

memorizes your list of triggers and things that help as soon as he realizes you get migraines at all. he uses his power to find when you mention said lists and if you ask, he'll just smile and tell you not to worry about it

also tends to pull you aside when you're around your triggers for a while to make sure you're alright. regardless of answer he reminds you he has your meds if you need them

if warm drinks or comfort foods help, he figures out how to make them and when pretty fast. he likes being efficient at getting your pain to go away as soon as possible

#obey me #obey me nightbringer #moth hcs #lucifer obey me #obey me mammon #levi obey me #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beel #obey me belphie #obey me belphegor #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me headcanons #chronic migraine #obey me x reader #moth writes

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thishazeleyeddemon · 6 months ago

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Magic wars leave behind bodies, and occasionally, spells. Cast but not detonated, you can find them glowing softly at the bottom of streams that run through old battlefields.

You can’t just swim down and get them, though – touch will have them go off in your hands, and then who knows what will happen to you. One of the spellminers I worked with touched one carelessly once – not even with his hands, with the end of a pickaxe – and it was me who had to carry what was left back to his family, afterwards. You don’t go through something like that and not learn how to be careful, let’s put it that way.

----

Hey I wrote a fantasy short story (based on a prompt by @deepwaterwritingprompts) and I put it on Ko-fi! It's free or pay what you want! Please read it and tell me what you think!

#moth writes #spellminers #writers on tumblr #creative writing #writeblr #writers of tumblr #dark fantasy #fantasy

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marcos-scorpion · 2 years ago

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Do I look good, Mr Armstrong? - Marcus Armstrong x Reader

hihihi! So turns out quite a few people were interested in this when i posted to ask, so here it is ! This was just gonna be mega fluff announcing your relationship, but apparently I’m incapable of writing just fluff, so this is angst with a happy ending. Defo not my best work, but I love this sm so i hope you do to. Also! Requests are open for f1/f2/motorsports now i guess! Xoxo moth

Warnings- angst to fluff. Relationship doubts (that are wrong). Secret relationship.

Word count- 1.8k

——

Watching James and Clem pose for the silly TikTok that Marcus was making, you let out a little chuckle, as a stupid plan began to form in your head, mind whirring as you tried to figure out what your boyfriend’s opinion on the matter would be. Snapping out of your little daydream of Marcus’ possible responses to your dumb scheme, you ducked your head off his shoulder just in time for him to flip the camera to himself to end the TikTok.

No one knew about your relationship with the beautiful boy seated beside you, not even his close friends and podcast co-hosts sat across from the pair of you. To the world, you were Marcus’ close childhood friend, the only person that could keep his life on track. His team saw you as his personal assistant, the rest of his friends jokingly calling you his slave. In reality, you took the job to work for him to ensure you could be close to him, to travel the world with the love of your life at your side, watching him do what he loves.

After almost three years as a secret couple, and over fifteen years as inseparable best friends, seeing you two close in public wasn’t rare. No one questioned you leaning against him, plenty of childhood photos had circulated the Internet to prove that it wasn’t a new development. When photos of this meal inevitably ended up plastered across the twitter trending page, they would be compared to those childhood photos, as they are every time a photo of the pair of you is posted online. The difference now, is no one could see your ankle looped with Marcus’, his hand placed firmly on your upper thigh.

Marcus’ desperation to keep your relationship hidden was a sore spot in your lives. Between his obvious following, and the collection of fans you had amassed across different social media, both with and without his help, there would be a small meltdown at the reveal of your relationship, especially after being hidden for so long. Marcus claimed it was to keep you safe, but you can’t help but feel that he’s ashamed of you, no matter how much he argues against it.

You were no stranger to the hate that comes from even being associated with people in careers like Marcus, let alone the hate that came from your own career in social media. You knew you could handle petty people telling you Marcus deserved better from behind a screen. It was an ongoing point of contempt in your relationship, with the most recent argument about the topic leaving an iciness over the two of you even now.

In public, very little had changed, but in private, the quiet of his drivers room and hotel suites bigger than your flat, empty garages long after his engineers had left, not a word was shared between you. It stung, his disbelief that you could handle a little hate, that you could handle yourself. You hadn’t voiced the fears that he refused to go public because he was ashamed of you. The answer you believe you will receive from Marcus scaring you before the words could even begin to formulate in his mind.

The most recent argument, the one still lingering now, had been the worst around the topic. In the most recent Screaming Meals podcast, a feminine laugh could be heard behind the scenes when Clem made a joke, and the way Marcus’ eyes shined when he looked to the person behind the camera had the comments speculating who she was, and who she was to him.

This speculation had been less than pleasant. The comments were ripping apart this girl, calling her ugly despite not seeing her face, calling her a cheat for laughing at Clement’s joke despite them believing her to be Marcus’ girl, saying she was an attention whore for distracting the boys, for having to be involved despite not being on camera.

It was easy to detach yourself from these comments, for you at least. Marcus struggled more, clearly taking many of the words to heart and believing you did too. Hate was hate to you, it didn’t have to affect your relationship unless you let it. Unfortunately, Marcus let it.

“You shouldn’t have to go through all this shit just to be seen with me!” Marcus had his hand on the door handle to your shared suite, “It’s been me and you, always. There’s no fucking need to change that now. No one else needs to know as long as we do.”

Those had been his final words of the argument just a few days before, as he left you in the unnecessarily plush hotel. They stung. The fact he seemed so ashamed to admit he loved you, that, yeah it had always been you and him, but it was different now. And you wanted people to know. Clearly, he didn’t see it the same way.

That night was the first in three years that the other bed in the suite had been used, even though he didn’t come back until the next morning.

——

A few days after the TikTok the boys had been making was posted to the Screaming Meals page, you and Marcus seemed to be back to somewhat normal. Well, you were exchanging small, meaningless conversations and sleeping in the same bed. Deciding you couldn’t hide this anymore, you decided to break this tentative peace, bringing back the topic he seemed so adamant to avoid.

You were trying to build up the courage as Marcus made his way out of the en-suite, smiling at you as you tried to get your eyeliner even in the mirror. Despite the tension, he had insisted that your date night went ahead. He had picked the fanciest restaurant that was within walking distance of your hotel, meaning a beautiful outfit was in order.

Meeting his eyes in the mirror as he sat on the end of the bed, shirtless but in smart dress pants, you gave him a shy smile, dragging as much confidence as you could to get your next words out.

“Marcus, we need to talk.” His face fell, but he nodded slightly, “I can't do this anymore. I can't be the hidden girlfriend, from your friends, your team, everyone. You keep saying it's because of the hate I would receive. But you’ve seen the hate I receive almost daily, just for existing on social media, and in your world. You know I can handle it. I feel like, at this point, you won't say anything because you’re-“

You broke into a sob, not even realising tears had been pooling at your lash line, desperately fanning your face so as to not smudge your makeup as all your worst fears bubbled to the surface.

“Because I’m what, love? Have I done something?” He looked panicked now, moving to stand behind you, warm palms on your bare arms.

“Well, yes, but no. Marcus.” Letting out a deep sigh, you prepared yourself for the rest of this conversation, “To me, you won’t post me because you’re ashamed for people to know I’m your girlfriend.” The last part of the sentence came out whispered and rushed. You wouldn’t have even known he heard you, had his hands not stopped ghosting across your shoulders.

With a deep sigh of his own, Marcus spun the chair you were sitting in, kneeling to face you as you desperately tried to hide behind your hair. Gently lifting your chin, he forced you to meet his eyes. The tears that had been pooling earlier had begun running down your face, gentle tracks in your otherwise pristine foundation.

“Oh sweetheart.” He whispered, tightly pulling you against him, face buried in the crook of his neck. “I promise you, the last thing I could ever be is ashamed of you. You are the love of my life, and have been since we were nine and you punched that girl for making me upset.” You let out a wet snort at the memory, but your tears continue to flow, dripping onto Marcus’ collarbone. “I truly thought I was protecting you by not announcing anything. I should have shown you off to everyone as soon as I had the chance. And I am beyond sorry I didn’t. Nothing in my life matters without you there by my side.”

You were fully sobbing now, but you had raised your head to look in your boyfriend’s eyes, surprised to find them lined with thick tears. Reaching up to cup his cheek, you lightly shook your head.

“It’s ok. Well, it isn’t. But we can fix it.” And with a watery smile, you pecked his forehead.

“Do you want me to post something? I could do a instagram photo dump, you know I have enough photos? Or we’re recording Screaming Meals tomorrow, could I say something on the podcast?” Chuckling at the panicked look in your boyfriend’s eyes, you grinned slightly, your usual glint returning to your eyes.

“Well, I had an idea the other day, but if you’re not comfortable with it, we can do something else.”

——

That’s how, when you had finished fixing your makeup, you and Marcus were standing in front of the full length mirror, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist as you brought up the TikTok sound, purposely keeping the camera angled to the side so Marcus wouldn’t be seen.

“I’m sorry, I just need one minute to make sure I look good.”

Gently running one of his fingers under your lip to wipe an imaginary smudge of lipstick away as you mouthed along to the words, watching as you tilted your head to the side as you continued.

“Do you think I look good, Mr Armstrong?”

Smiling lightly as you move your phone so that Marcus was visible, with his arms wrapped tightly around you, his head resting against yours, he grabbed your jaw to pull you into a kiss as the audio switched to the music and the TikTok ended.

After watching it back, along with a burst of laughter at how Clem and James would react, especially after he wasn’t excited to use the sound with them, you hit post, quickly followed by Marcus saving it and posting it on his instagram.

Within minutes, both of your phones were flooded with notifications that were ignored as someone started banging on your suite door. James and Clem fell through the door as soon as you swung it open, babbling about how they knew it, how Clem owed James money because he didn’t think Marcus would have the guts to say something. Giggling as your boyfriend tried to calm his friends, also cracking into laughter himself as he returned to your side to wrap his arms around you again.

He grinned down at you as you reached out for Clem, who was currently trying to escape James, he was honestly upset he hadn't done this sooner.

#marcus armstrong x reader #marcus armstrong #f1 #f2 #f2 x reader #moth writes

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hucowboyification · 6 months ago

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Hello I am here to be a Bucktommy menace :) I don't have something super specific but the vibe of "god it's too hot to wear clothes right now"?

(Sorry this is Very short and not particularly smutty- when i say warm up mini fills, i mean mini bfjcbdjc.)

They're only inside for a matter of minutes before Tommy's shirt comes off, then his belt; but before he can pull his pants down, Buck damn near throws himself at Tommy, hands clutching at his sides while he presses himself against his boyfriend as firmly as he possibly can.

"Hey, hey!" Tommy protests between kisses before finally managing to settle his hands on Buck's shoulders, pushing him back slightly. "God, Evan. You know people can be naked for reasons other than sex, right?" Tommy laughs,

Buck stands there for a moment, looking like a puppy whose bone was stolen, before sitting down on the other end of the couch and fiddling with the remote control.

"Sorry, did you, uh-" he mumbles, flipping quickly between different shows. "Uh- cooking show?"

Tommy nods, raising a hand to his mouth to keep from laughing. Buck is just... so good. And so sincere. It's impossible not to tease him.

They get ten minutes into a show (Tommy has no clue what it is, really- he's been too busy trying to pretend to not watch Buck trying to pretend to watch the show) before he finally decides to stop teasing.

In one smooth movement, he grabs Buck's arm, yanking him over so he's half laying on Tommy.

Buck looks so surprised that he just has to laugh, which causes Buck to make a somewhat ridiculously pathetic face that Tommy can't resist kissing.

"Come on, Evan- I was messing with you," he says, hands cupping Buck's face. "Just wanted to see what you'd do."

Then Buck is kissing him again, even more eager for having been denied, however briefly, and their show is forgotten; not, of course, that either of them had paid any attention to it in the first place.

Feel free to send any Tarlos or BuckTommy prompts my way!

#bucktommy #nsft #mothcow #moth writes

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arcade-chaos · 1 year ago

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Day 3: Chill

Subnautica au! Mer sun and Moon, they/them for insert, cuddles

I've been reading not enough subnautica aus, so i went a little feral. you know what thing where someone puts their cold feet or hands on their partner? Ya thats Moon. Anywhos

The base was frozen. That was the only explanation that came to mind as they groggily slipped into awareness, some logical part in the back of their brain knew they should get up and find whatever faulty wire had let the temperature drop so low, but they would be damned if they crawled out of the warm bubble of their blankets. Groggily they poked their head out, snatching up their datapad before diving back under to ignore the freeze that nipped their ears.

It didn’t give them anything helpful, chiming off that they needed to conserve heat while looking through the paneling with their scanner. That sounded like an activity for someone not in their undersuit, preferably one with thick slippers. And maybe a hat.

With what could only be described as the world's most tortured groan they rose, stumbling towards their wetsuit as they clung to the blankets last bit of warmth. Their feet were already frozen by the time they slipped it on, going as far as to wear the flippers to avoid frostbite.

“I knew I should’ve stayed in the shallows.” They grumbled halfheartedly. They knew they needed to get deeper, and the rocky cliff they were clinging to was the easiest way down to the river, but hell if they didn’t miss the warm waters of the shallows. Something distant splashed up in the moonpool, a quiet rumble soothing their concerns. They frowned and shivered as they scanned the bedroom, moving down the hall to meet Moon who was, as usual, tracking water through the base.

“Rude.” They grumbled, ignoring his purr that turned into a little coo. He shuffled in front of their scanner as it buzzed, looming up to stare at their face. “Ya stinker?” He frowned and stuck out his tongue, though it didn’t last long. Instead he placed his hand over their head, which made them pull back from the chill of the water that clung to his skin.

“Hurt?” He whined, beginning to nose under their blanket cape for a wound.

“No, not hurt. Just cold.” He frowned, clicking over the word a few times as he circled them. “Cold, like not warm. Shallows are warm, down here is cold.” He chuffed, his tail wetly slapping the floor as he stared at them. “You’re also cold.”

“Cold… Bad?” He frowned.

“Not necessarily. It’s only bad if it's too cold.” They gestured to the room, scanning the wall again. “I gotta find whatevers making my base cold and fix it.” Moon hummed, following them for a bit before piping back up.

“I’ll be back. Get Sun.” They hummed a goodbye, sighing as the scan came up clean yet again. It wasn’t life threatening by any means, they were dry enough, but the combination of flippers and blanket cape made getting around the space difficult. They managed to get through the green house, after fretting over all the plants, and into the moonpool by the time their companions came back. Sun skittered towards them immediately, stopped only by Moon tugging his tail back.

“Wet.” He chided, pulling up to the opposite wall to shake off.

“Oh NOW you respect my wishes.” They snorted, teeth chattering as they shook. It was even worse in here. The scan relieved their greatest worries, the insulation in the left wall was soaked. They pulled off their blanket and prepared to dive in to patch the hull, stopped by Sunny’s warm hands on their neck.

“Cold??” He fretted, purring as they leaned into his hands. Despite the dampness they could feel the heat coming back to his skin.

“Ya, I gotta fix the outside before it’ll warm up again.” They hummed, content to just stay there in Sun’s grasp to soak up the heat. Sun seemed pretty content with that plan too, pulling them back as Moon snatched up their scanner.

“I'll fix.” He grumbled, clicking the button repeatedly and staring at the little laser grid it lit on the floor.

“You don’t know how.” He rolled his eyes.

“Get rock, point, fix.” Okay, maybe he did know. Props to Alterra for making tech so easy they supposed.

“Only because you’re so nice.” They taunted, trying to tighten their jaw to keep their teeth from clacking. Sun quickly scooped them and the blanket up, carrying them deeper into the base as Moon sank below the water. They didn’t protest when he removed their flippers, wrapping them both in the blanket to lay on the bed. They could feel his heartbeat under his scales, coursing warmth through his limbs as he rubbed little circles on their back.

“Better?” They sighed, snuggling a bit closer to warm their nose.

“Mmhm…” They mumbled, suddenly much sleepier. Their datapad beeped as Moon resurfaced, clamoring into the room with a wet shake.

“Fix. When warm?”

“Mm…” They squinted at the pad. “An hour or two.” Moon seemed annoyed with the answer, Sun chose to snuggle closer instead.

“I'm warm.” He purred, seemingly pleased with the situation at hand.

“Yep, very warm.” They snorted, giggling as Moon whined at the foot of the bed. “Why are you pouting?” They taunted, pulling away to get a better look. Moon growled softly, his lure wagging.

“... Cold.” He mumbled, eyeing the bed and Sun with clear jealousy. Sun clicked something and pulled them a little tighter, eyeing his still damp skin.

“You can come warm up if you dry off-” They didn’t get to finish their request before he was scampering off and rubbing himself on the towels. He returned even quicker, leaping into bed rough enough to make it bounce. They were glad they opted for the two person size, even then it was squished with two mers around them. At least the blanket stopped Moon’s chill from leaching their heat. Moon purred quietly, curling his tail around their form and over Sun’s back, wiggling down into the blankets quickly.

“Cold!!” Sun squeaked, pressing even closer to the human sandwich in the middle as Moon cackled.

“Warm.”

#fnaf sun x reader #fnaf moon x reader #fnaf dca #fnaf sun #fnaf moon #promptober #fnaf mer au #subnautica au #mermaid au #moth writes #moth skitters #sun x reader #moon x reader #dca moon #sun/moon au #dca sun

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mothknight42 · 8 months ago

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lesbians? under my moon goddess' light? more likely than you'd think

#moth writes #bg3 #bg3 fic #isobel/aylin #aylin x isobel #isobel thorm #dame aylin #YES i am back with another fic. the premise of this one is kinda funny. to me. i love them your honor #my fic

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silverwings22 · 11 days ago

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Help Moth Make a Decision

So I very much want to participate in ClonexOC Week. I had a ton of fun with my Arttober project and I really think that towards the end the daily practice was starting to improve my digital art skills. (I am bullied by my own lack of knowledge, having done only traditional art for 30 years, but I wanna learn.) My problem is: Picking an OC to focus on feels like trying to pick a favorite child. I've narrowed it down specifically to the Bad Batch OC's at least. For context here, Face of Blood and Ink will at least be partially posted by February. Doctor's Orders will not be. Caught in the Crosshairs and Song of the Sea are finished.

#original character #clone x oc #fanfic #the bad batch #star wars #caught in the crosshairs #song of the sea #faces of blood and ink #Doctor's orders #oc miria halcyon #oc vayryn vale #oc shiani illumai #oc tyleia symphona #moth writes

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hotmothsummer · 6 months ago

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Hi! i rewrote some bits of the episode with starscream and hashtag bc i love them oh so very much and i feel as though the ep didnt hit the tonal beats i wanted. Check it out if u wanted more hashtag and Starscream bonding or more exploration of Megatron’s abuse

#moth writes #maccadams #transformers earthspark #tf earthspark #hashtag malto #starscream #megatron #moths fics

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help-i-lost-my-sock · 9 months ago

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A Penny for Your Thoughts (Ace x Reader)

A/N: While I love cocky, confident Ace, I felt like the softer, more damaged side of him deserved some love too <3

Summary: Ace has been feeling a bit low lately, and has been isolating from Reader, and the crew. Reader goes to talk to him, and a rather emotional interaction ensues. Please see warnings.

Warnings: Ace is having an emotional, and vulnerable moment. Ace struggling with his self-worth. Mentions of alcohol usage.

Writing prompt:

"Did you just kiss me?"

"Was I not supposed to?"

"I don't know... But can you do it again?"

Tags: Ace x Reader, angst & comfort, Ace dealing with self-worth issues

Word count: 2900

~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~

You and Ace had been close friends for quite some time now. Very close, actually. Not quite as close as you’d have liked to be, but that did not matter much, as long as you had his friendship. Yes, if nothing else, his friendship was enough.

Lately though, your friendship seemed to have been somewhat shaken. For some reason, Ace had been distancing from you, and all others lately. Sure, he’d still act fine when people talked to him. But that was not quite the way it used to be… The Ace you’d known so far was a bit of a chatter box - that is, when he was not fast asleep on the deck, or with his face in a plate of food. He loved to socialise with the crew, and was always offering to help wherever he felt he could be of any use. He’d often be engaged in some conversation or another, swapping tips and tops, cracking jokes, or regaling his men with tales. Now, however, he’d rather lean over the railing, gazing at the sea, lost in thought, or sit alone, isolated, than engage with others. He’d slip out during group conversations, or spend hours shut in the study, haunched over maps, and documents, working his way through endless stacks of paperwork - a task he’d always dreaded more than any other. It was not quite the same, no.

It would be a lie to say it did not worry you. Ace was your best friend, and, if you were being honest with yourself, he was a bit more than that. It was only natural for you to notice, to miss him, and to worry. You couldn’t bring this up around others - it was clear it was not something he’d want broadcast in front of a crowd. So, you decided to speak to him as soon as you’d catch him alone. It shouldn’t be too hard. Afterall, he tended to seclude himself every chance he got those days. So, you waited. Ace had spent most of the day in the study. At lunch, there was not enough privacy to speak to him, so you let it slide. Afterwards, he disappeared, and you had no idea where.

Eventually, night had fallen, and the Whitebeards were having a party on the main deck. It seemed like your plan would have to wait another day. The crowd grew and grew, as the music played, and the booze flowed. It was not unusual for pirates to party, and the parties on the Moby Dick never disappointed. Or at least, they never had, until this point. For, as expected, you could not find Ace anywhere in the crowd, and a party without him simply felt incomplete.

You spent some of the night gliding through the crowds, slipping from clique to clique, from conversation to conversation, eventually setting camp up by yourself by the refreshments table. You sighed as you scanned the swaying masses, as they sang, and danced, and chatted… as if they hadn’t even noticed.

“Hey,” came a voice from behind you, as a hand gently grasped your shoulder. You turned around to find Marco, and Thatch. Thatch had a compassionate smile on his face, and, while Marco didn’t show it on his lips, the same compassion, and understanding could be read in his eyes as he looked down at you, secluded as you were, camping alone by the booze.

“We know,” Marco says softly. You tilt your head sideways, questioning him with a silent look.

“You must be thinking we hadn’t noticed how Ace has been drawing himself back lately,” he starts, as he takes his hand off your shoulder, and turns to look at the merry-makers. “How can the crew party as if they don’t even notice? But we do notice. We all do.” Now that he mentioned it, it dawned on you that Ace’s presence was not the only absence here tonight - a certain carefreeness seemed to escape many that night, and certainly those close to Ace - you, the commanders, Pops, and the men of his division. Now that you were aware of it, you saw it nearly everywhere - in their eyes, as they, too, scanned the crowd; on their lips, curled in half-smiles; on the very countenance of their bodies. They could all tell something - or rather, someone - was missing that night.

“We were hoping a party might draw him out,” joined Thatch. “The plan was to get some booze in him, and hope it’ll loosen him up enough to tell us what’s wrong - how we can help. But, as you can see…”

“He didn’t show,” finished Marco.

“He never showed up,” you said simultaneously.

“Yup…But!” he added with excitement, and you saw a smile creep on Marco’s face as he turned to look at you once more.

“We got one more thing we’d like to try.”

“Ah, and that is where I come in, I presume?” You turned to look at them, swirling your drink, as you waited for them to continue.

“Yep,” they confirmed in unison, before Marco proceeded to explain. “See, we found him sulking alone on the quarterdeck. Seems he came out for the booze, but didn’t stick around for the company.”

“Ouch! Well, that’s flattering,” you remarked jokingly, knowing full well it was nothing personal.

“Yeah, well, he won’t talk to us,” explained Thatch.

“Yep, we’re clearly part of the ‘company’ he seems to be avoiding… Which brings us to your part.”

“Ah, I get it. You want me to go up there, and see if I fare any better than you two.”

Thatch was smiling, while Marco chuckled at your deduction, giving you a small smirk.

“No,” he answered, “we know you’ll fare better than us.” The small, lopsided grin on Marco’s face made you cock an eyebrow for an instant, but you quickly brushed it off, as Thatch joined in once more.

“Yeah, we know you two are close. Hell, no one’s closer to him than you, except maybe his brothers,” added Thatch, matter-of-factly.

“So, what we want from you is to go up there and bring him back to Earth.”

You looked at them - they clearly cared about him, and were now resting their hopes on you, giving you a chance to help. They were giving you a chance to speak to him alone about whatever it is that’s been bothering him, just the way you’d told yourself you’d do. You glanced at your drink, swirling it around some more. Thatch’s words about how close you and Ace were made you feel warm inside. Maybe there was hope for you yet… But now was not the time for that. Snapping out of your thoughts, you looked up at your fellow conspirators.

“Leave it to me!” you declared, shooting them a grin.

“I knew we could count on you,” cheered Thatch, with a big smile, while Marco kept on his usual lazy smirk, giving you a small nod. They refilled your drink, and shoved a beer for Ace in your hands, before ushering you to the quarterdeck.

You took a deep breath trying to calm your nerves, before you strutted off, shouting over your shoulder “Wish me luck!”

“Good luck!” the guys responded, as you disappeared behind a corner.

It was a warm night, and the skies were clear, revealing a veritable sea of stars above your head, complete with a bright full moon, and with nary a cloud in sight. The music from the party was fading as you walked further and further away, towards the quarterdeck; its spritely rhythms now barely enough to muffle the clicking sound of your footsteps on the wooden planks.

Indeed, way in the back, hidden out of sight, was Ace. Slumped on the deck, with his back resting against a wall, a couple of empty beers around him, and one bottle hanging by the neck in his hand. His head tilted upwards, his eyes fixed on the stars above him. He seemed so calm, so quiet, and yet, not serene in the slightest. It was as if the silent sorrow in his soul crept its way towards you, and took you by the hand, when his eyes suddenly turned to you. A smile made its way onto his lips, but failed to reach his tired eyes. ‘Had he been crying?’

“Hey, Y/N! What are you doing here?” Ace tried to act cheerful, and play pretend; he tried to hide his expression by finishing his drink, but you knew him far too well for that, and saw right through his act.

“I heard you were out here,” you confessed as you went to sit down by his side, handing him the beer. “I haven’t seen you in a while,” you continued, as Ace took the bottle from your hand, “and I missed you. We’ve all been missing you.” You spoke softly, your voice barely above the sounds surrounding you - the music, the clamour from the main deck, with the clanging of beer-filled mugs, and the familiar sounds of waves splashing rhythmically against the sides of the ship. Ace averted his gaze from you, lest you saw the truth in his eyes. But you already knew. You’ve seen it the moment he looked your way.

Shuffling around a bit, you shifted position, and made yourself more comfortable against the wall, by his side. You allowed a moment to pass in silence, not intending to come off too forcefully, as you both watched the stars twinkling above your heads. You took a sip of your drink. The sloshing of liquid punctuated the silence before you spoke.

“Care you tell me what’s got you so down? Hm?” you questioned, as gently as you could. Slowly, you turned your head towards him, giving him a side-look, and a soft, half-hearted smile as you waited for his response.

Ace pulled his knees up to his chest, and wrapped his arms around them; the bottle you’d given him still hanging in his hand. He thought he hid it better than that, even from you. But he should have known you’d see right through, and if he were being honest with himself, deep down, he was glad you did. He needed you to pull him out of the spiralling nightmares that had become his thoughts. But that didn’t make it any easier to get the words out.

Ace rested his chin on his arms, staring straight ahead, at nothing in particular, as his mind scampered to string words together. Though his mouth was hidden behind one of his arms, you could see he was working on an answer by the frown that weighed on his brow. A few moments passed in silence before you placed your hand on his shoulder blade, gently rubbing his back. His eyes darted up to yours, his mouth hanging ever so slightly open, before closing it again, and averting his gaze once more. The warmth of your hand on his skin was comforting, safe, inviting; inviting him to tell you of his woes.

“I’m sorry,” he says quietly, his voice barely above a whisper, barely audible over the commotion of the party on the main deck.

“What for?”

“For making you worry… You, and Marco, and Thatch, and Izou, and Pops, and all the others…I’m sorry for shutting you all out these past few days… weeks. I’m just…” Ace paused for a moment, as he turned his head away from you again, and fixed his eyes on the swaying waves before him. “I… haven’t been myself lately, is all.”

“Ace, it’s alright. We’ve all got our darker days. It’s - “

Ace draws a shaky breath, before cutting you off. “I know it’s not fit for a commander - t’ give in like that, and shut you all out. I should have done better… You all deserve better…”

The hand that was rubbing his back froze in place, as you stared at him in shock - eyes wide, and slack jawed - struggling to believe the words you were hearing. Seeing Ace crumbling down like this certainly struck a chord. You and Ace were close, but this was a side of him you’d never seen before. Was this the same daredevil you’d grown so used to over time? Sure, you were aware that he wasn’t always that same cocky bastard. You knew he had a softer side too, and you knew he was damaged too. You knew that he struggled with his past - his ancestry, especially - wondering if he really deserved to be where he was, and be loved as he was. Sometimes he’d wondered if maybe he could have done more for Luffy - if he was a good older brother. Other times he wondered if he was doing right by Pops, and the other Whitebeards. You knew all of this, and then some. But you’d never seen him so broken before. How long had he been carrying this stone around his neck? At a loss of words, all you could do was stare at him - lips trembling as you tried to form words; throat tightening, as you tried to hold back tears.

“I’m sorry you’re missing out on the party to sit here with me,” he continued, “but I also wanna say thank you. Thank you for your time, and thank you for your company.” He adjusted his sitting position, stretching out the leg nearest to you and allowing it to bend to the side, as his arm hung over his bent knee. “I hope you know how much I value your friendship… despite the past couple of weeks… And thanks for the drink too,” he chuckles, a bittersweet smile on his face as he takes a swig, before quickly resuming his monologue. “And thank Marco and Thatch too for trying to cheer me up. I don’t know what I ever did to deserve you guys. Y'all deserve better than someone like me,” he trailed off. His head briefly dipped down against his arm, before he quickly lifted it up, and tilted it back against the wall. It was as if he were afraid that if he allowed his head to hang like that he might break down, and cry. His lips curled, and trembled with a bittersweet smile. You watched as his brows furrowed, and the corners of his mouth twitched, before he covered his eyes with his hand. From his shaking lips came a sound hard to pinpoint. Was it a sob? A scoff? A chortle? Whatever it was, it clearly captured his inner turmoil.

Seeing him like this disarmed you completely. You gawked at him for a moment longer, unaware that large, warm tears had started spilling from your eyes, down your cheeks, and down your neck. You watched him shake his head, as if in disbelief of the situation too - in disbelief of the things he’s said, in disbelief of having allowed someone to see him like that.

The shock still prevented you from forming proper sentences, but you could no longer sit by silently. “Ace…”

Hearing his name carried on a breathy whisper snaps him out of his spiral, and pulls his attention towards you. Ace hardly had time to register the pained look on your tear-stained face, before you cupped his cheeks in your hands, and pressed your lips against him. You squeezed your eyes shut, forcing out the tears past your lashes. The kiss felt hot, with a thick blend of love, and pain; with all the laden words that have spilt, and all those that would not come; with all emotions that you both had been trying to hide. It wasn’t long before you slowly pulled away from him, keeping his face between your palms. The kiss may not have lasted long, but it was enough to get him to shut up, and cease his self-deprecatory verbiage, if only for a moment. You took a moment to scan the shocked, flustered expression on his freckled face before speaking.

“I’ll decide what I deserve,” you stated, finally letting go of his face.

You watched as Ace, who seemed perfectly stupefied by your little stunt, attempted - and failed - to pull his wits about him.

“Did… Did you just kiss me?” He looked cute as a button as he pointed at himself, confused, as if trying to comprehend his own question. You chuckled at his reaction.

“Was I not supposed to?” You may have chuckled at his reaction, but the truth is that you did it on an impulse, and now the reality of it all was setting in for you too. You’d had a crush on him for ages now, and never in a million years would you have imagined things going this way. But what’s done is done, and this was the moment of truth. Every moment it took for him to answer felt like an eternity, as you kept wondering - What was he going to do? What was he going to say? You couldn’t help but avert your eyes from his, as you felt a blush creep onto your face. You cursed the full moon for its glow so bright, for you were nearly sure Ace could see the deep pink darkening your cheeks.

“I don’t know, but… Can you do it again?”

Looking up, you found Ace watching you, expectantly, with a soft, albeit nervous, smile, and a blush to rival your own.

“Yeah… Yeah, I’d say you deserve some more.”

#portgas d ace x reader #one piece #portgas d ace #portgas d ace comfort #moth fics #moth writes #ace x reader #portgas d. ace x reader #Ace struggles with self-worth issues #portgas d. ace #ace one piece #friends to lovers #hurt/comfort #mild hurt/comfort

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halfmoth-halfman · 2 years ago

Text

life's little comforts

Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x Medic!Reader Synopsis: Soap finally gets a better glimpse into your relationship with the Lieutenant- even if it's not the way he wants. Word Count: 3.9k Warnings: alcohol, smoking/cigarettes, torture, gore, blood, canon typical violence Disclaimer: I do not own modern warfare or any of the modern warfare characters. part one. part two. part four.

It’s late in the day when Soap walks into your office.

He hadn’t planned on being here, but after literally running into you- he wasn’t paying attention, and you took a corner too quickly- you’d asked him to grab a file from your office and bring it to you in Price’s office. You didn’t give him the chance to decline- not that he would’ve- continuing down the hall with a quick thanks.

It feels a bit like breaking and entering, like sneaking into his parents’ room as a child when they weren’t home. It’s too quiet, the sound of boots against the vinyl plank echoing in his eardrums as he heads to your desk. It’s a stack of papers in a bright blue file; you can’t miss it, you’d told him.

He can miss it, apparently, since the file seems to be absent from your desk. Your plethora of colorful office supplies sits neatly organized atop your desk alongside your phone, computer, and printer, but there’s not a single file in sight. There are stacks of papers on the filing cabinets- the doors of which, he discovers, are locked with no key in sight- behind your desk and an absurd amount of sticky notes covering the locked glass planes of the pill cabinets. His only other option is-

He doesn’t want to go through your desk. It feels silly but somehow he imagines the desk sitting in front of him to be an extension of you. If he peeks inside the drawers, will he find clues about what makes you, you? He can’t imagine you’ll be angrier about him going through your desk than not bringing you the file but still, he hesitates.

It takes him two minutes to talk himself into it, telling himself not to look at anything that doesn’t look work-related.

It takes one minute for him to completely disregard that as he pulls open the bottom drawer and sees the thick black edges of a picture frame beneath the file he was sent to find. He pulls the file and the frame from the drawer, setting the file on your desk with no consideration as he examines the photo. Saying the picture is old is an understatement. Deep creases run down the center and across it- someone’s folded and unfolded it several times- with the edges frayed away to almost nothing. The image is faded to all hell, but Soap recognizes the two figures in it with ease.

You’re in a warehouse perched atop a stack of black military crates, putting you at eye level with Ghost, who stands leaning against the crates in the space next to you. Your hair is longer, left down and pushed back by a pair of sunglasses and you’re dressed in all black with a matching tac vest. Ghost is dressed similarly, all black and all tactical, but the familiar skull plate is replaced by a pair of black sunglasses resting over his painted balaclava. The two of you are facing each other, covered in dirt and grime and what is most likely blood, but you’re beaming up at Ghost like you’ve won the lottery, as he cradles your left hand in his gloveless hands, caught in the process of sliding a solid black ring onto your finger.

The words Ghost & Hornet are scrawled across the bottom in someone’s chicken scratch above a date that's been worn away.

How long ago was this taken? Why is your callsign Hornet? What did you do before you became the 141 doctor? Who took this picture? If it wasn’t one of you who took it, then who gave it to you? Questions swirl around Soap’s head as he stares down at the picture in his hands.

“Did you grab that folder?”

Soap drops the frame back into the drawer, kicking it shut with lightning speed as the door swings open and you peek your head inside.

“Got it right here!” You barely take a step inside your office before he’s meeting you at the door, shoving the file into your hands. “Need anything else?”

“No, that was it,” you smile up at him- a small imitation of that same beaming smile in the picture- taking the file. “Thanks for grabbing it for me.”

“Of course, Doc.” Soap follows you out of your office and the infirmary, watching you continue down the hall before he splits off toward the barracks.

He respects you and Ghost, respects your privacy, but all the clues and all the hints have piled up into a perfect little mystery waiting to be solved.

What’s the saying: curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought it back.

Three weeks turns to six weeks turns to nine weeks turns to twelve.

If Soap never has to see the glittering crystal white of snowfall again, he’ll be glad for it. The mission wasn’t supposed to take this long but, as all missions that take place in the ass end of nowhere seem to do, something went wrong and the team is stuck in the Narsaq mountains.

Everything was fine after the first delay; the team was frustrated but optimistic for the most part. After the second delay, there were small cases of worry and bickering but everyone was able to stay on track. Things go downhill at the start of month three and by the end of the fourth month, it’s a miracle that any of them are speaking to each other.

Soap drags his feet up the stairs to the base rooftop where Ghost is on watch. He assumes you’re there too; Price had sent you to relieve the Lieutenant not ten minutes ago before deciding two pairs of eyes were better than one and sending Soap up after you. You weren’t happy about it- your hatred of the cold stronger than anyone else’s- and you’d frowned at Price’s orders, stomping your feet the entire way out of the room. Soap could see the irritation rolling off of Price in waves before the Captain uncharacteristically snaps at him to follow you and send Ghost back down.

The rooftop door is held open by a rock, letting the soft flurries of snow drift inside and coat the top four steps. Soap takes those steps carefully, not trusting the rusted railing and the way it grates and shrieks whenever someone leans on it. Bracing himself for the cold, he tucks himself further into his heavy jacket, stepping onto the rooftop and into the ankle-deep snow. He turns to the right and comes to an immediate standstill when he spots you and Ghost.

You’re both leaning against the broken a/c unit, staring out into the endless white of the mountain range. Ghost’s mask is pushed up to his nose as the two of you pass a cigarette back and forth but he’s shed his jacket, leaving him in a thermal long-sleeved shirt. There’s no mystery as to where the jacket went; you’re happily drowning in the oversized garment, snuggling into the fabric every time you pass the cigarette back to Ghost.

Soap creeps back to the staircase, stepping softly to avoid the crunch of the snow. He peeks outside again, catching you as you watch Ghost take a long drag from the cigarette. He holds the cigarette out to you, keeping his eyes forward; a perfect distraction as you lean forward and press a kiss to the sliver of skin on his wrist peeking out between his glove and shirt sleeve. You pluck the cigarette from his hand, looking back out over the snowcaps with a playful smile- the first smile Soap’s seen on your face in weeks. Ghost shakes his head, pinching your ear when you turn away from him but it’s obvious the way the tension eases from his shoulders.

Soap chuckles to himself, moving back down the staircase to take a seat at the bottom of the steps as he decides Price can wait a few more minutes.

Rough missions are par for the course for the 141, everyone knows it.

Everyone has their own way of coping, their own personal rituals for decompressing. Before you had joined, Soap had no idea what Ghost did after a particularly hard mission. Staying true to his namesake, the man would simply vanish, appearing hours, sometimes days, later without a word.

He never explained, and no one ever asked.

It’s still true now, though everyone knows if they really need his whereabouts they can ask you; whether or not you’ll tell them is a different story.

But then there are the missions that stick- the missions where the blood sinks into the skin and stains the bones red. Where dying faces are burned into the backs of their eyelids and imprinted in the parts of the brain that will last long after everything else has faded. Where the chorus of bullets and death rattles drown out all other sounds long after the fight has ended.

Ghost doesn’t bother with pretense after those missions. Instead, he beelines to the infirmary, disappearing into your office where you allow him to stay, keeping the door locked unless you- and only you- need to get something.

Soap gets it- he’s probably one of the few who do- which is why he does his best to keep his distance from you and your office unless it’s an emergency.

It’s late when he passes by the infirmary. Exhausted and sore, he shuffles towards his room on his way back from the fitness center- his own way of coping- passing by the infirmary doors. It looks mostly empty, the only light coming through the glass on your office door, and he thinks for a brief moment that he should check on you and ask after Ghost.

He makes it to your door, taking note of the shade that’s drawn halfway up. He bends slightly to get a clearer view inside, the lamp on your desk the only dim source of light in the room. Ghost sits in one of the chairs in front of your desk with the entirety of his body weight leaning forward against you as you stand between his legs. His head is down, pressed against your stomach and his hands grip tightly onto your hips.

Soap doesn’t need more light to see the tension wound up in Ghost, the weight of the mission bearing down on his bowed back.

You, on the other hand, are the embodiment of peace, supporting the weight pressed against you, hands running over Ghost’s shoulders and kneading into the tight muscle. Your fingers dip just under the collar of his shirt, skirting across the edges of his mask and you bend your head slightly. Soap can see your mouth moving and Ghost nods to whatever you ask him.

You gather the bottom of the balaclava in your hands, pushing it up just enough to get your hands underneath and around the base of his skull where you continue kneading into his skin. Ghost melts into you, pressing himself as far into you as he physically can.

You say something else and Ghost leans his head up to look at you just as you lean down and-

Soap steps back from the window, turning in his heel to head straight out of the infirmary with the affirming knowledge that you’ll both be okay.

There was a healthy mix of excitement and apprehension when Price told them they were teaming up with another task force. Guesses were thrown out over who this new team would be, what they’d be like, who’d be the better shot-

(“There’s no way they’ll be a better shot than me!”

“Everyone’s a better shot than you, Johnny.”

“…that hurts, Lt.”)

You don’t take part, letting the team speculate without adding anything yourself. Soap and Gaz try to get your input, teasing you until they think you’ll relent but they get nothing out of you.

Two weeks later, they’re gathered in the briefing room when the doors burst open, followed by the thundering of boots as three strangers in solid black tactical gear swarm you. Soap is on his feet in seconds as the largest one grabs you by the waist to swing you around and you…laugh?

You’re laughing. Why are you laughing? What’s going-

“At ease, Sergeant,” Price laughs, entering behind the boisterous group alongside an unfamiliar woman. The three strangers set you down, the smallest one looping an arm around your shoulders while the man who had picked you up claps Ghost on the shoulder with a wide smile.

“Missed us, Casper?”

“Like a knife in the gut,” Ghost deadpans.

It takes a minute for things to settle before Price makes introductions: Sergeant Theodore “Grizzly” Lin, Sergeant Charlotte “Firefly” Bishop, Sergeant Kenneth “Trip” Hale and Captain Juliana Owens.

Your former team.

Soap has so many questions, so many things he needs to know, but he doesn’t get the chance after introductions are made as Price and Captain Owens call the room to attention.

The mission sounds simple: your team has the locations of several hidden terrorist cells and will infiltrate and wipe them out with the 141’s help. It’s nothing either team hasn’t done before, but the additional manpower will help to get this done before the enemy decides to move house.

They mesh well with the 141, blending in almost seamlessly on base.

On the field is an entirely different story.

The 141 works well together, Soap knows that, but your team is on an entirely different level. They operate like a single person, moving with and covering each other without a word- like they were trained to protect each other from birth. Soap isn’t sure what’s more unsettling: the ease with which they hunt down their enemies or how effortlessly you slip into your role alongside them. He knew you could handle yourself, but after watching expertly slice through the jugular of a close-range enemy before twisting your hands around their neck to force the blood from their artery out through your fingers, he realizes how deeply the team has underestimated you.

And if he’s a little scared of you after that mission, he’ll never tell.

For the three months that your former team occupies the 141 base, Soap takes every opportunity to speak with your old teammates. He gets the most information out of Grizzly; the man is more than eager to brag about your abilities. Trip and Firefly offer occasional information if he asks, but it’s usually too vague for Soap to understand- like some kind of inside joke he’s only partially in on.

He gets a few tidbits from you: Theodore is as cuddly as a teddy but fights like he’s trying to maul his enemies, Charlotte- Charlie, she prefers- is a former fighter pilot with an allegedly long history with arson, and Kent is a mastermind when it comes to trip mines despite being clumsier than a newborn deer. He gets a couple of old mission stories from you too, nothing too detailed, some including Ghost, and all suspiciously absent of your involvement.

He asks Grizzly one day during a rare moment of downtime when you’re too occupied in your office to stop him-

(“What’s the story with the Doc?”

“Who? Hornet?”

“Why Hornet?”

“You ever seen a hornet in a beehive?”

Soap hasn’t. And judging by the feral smile that splits Grizzly’s face in two, he doesn’t want to.)

The teams go out to celebrate once the mission wraps up. It’s a long night filled with too much alcohol and too little supervision that ends at a run-down bar occupied only by both teams and the bartender. Soap taps out after losing the third round of billiards- even with Grizzly and Trip on his team, Gaz and Firefly still manage to wipe the floor with them every time- heading to the bar to get another beer.

“Cleaning crew cleared out the apartment. Said it looked like a random break-in, but we’re assigning you a new safehouse just to be sure.” Soap’s ears twitch as he hears Captain Owens speak. He glances to his right where you and Ghost sit at a table across from Price and Owens looking too serious for the occasion.

“What about the house?” you ask, folding your arms over your chest.

“No activity, but I’ve got eyes on it,” Owens sighs.

“You can take some time if you wanna check it out for yourselves,” Price suggests. You and Ghost share a brief look, an entire conversation passed between glances.

“Maybe another time,” you answer with a casual shrug.

“I swear, I’ve never met a couple more averse to spending time together at home than the two of you-” Owens shakes her head, turning to Price with a teasing grin. “You lettin’ my kids have too much fun on your base, John?”

Soap nearly chokes on his beer as you groan, scraping your hands down your face, and Ghost rolls his eyes so hard it’s a miracle they don’t roll back into his head.

Your former Captain knows- that makes sense if he thinks about it- but Price… Soap clearly remembers Price denying any knowledge of your and Ghost’s relationship. If he knew, if it was meant to be a secret, then why give him hints?

Soap is desperate to know more, the alcohol spurring him on as he gathers the questions in his head sorting them by level of importance so he’ll know which to ask first come tomorrow.

He doesn’t get the chance, as the team departs first thing without a word of goodbye and Price calls everyone in for a new mission.

Soap has seen his share of gruesome things, but this is-

They’re gathered around the small monitor, unable to tear their eyes from the screen. The video had been sent to Price with no name attached to it. It’s grainy, most likely recorded on an older camera but the audio…the audio is crystal clear.

And the way your screams echo through the room will haunt them for the rest of their days.

It was an accident. Through pure shitty luck, the team had been separated, then separated again, and once more until everyone was on their own trying to retrieve intel from an empty base that turned out to not be so empty. The intel was retrieved and their opponents made an uncharacteristically hasty exit. It isn’t until exfil arrives and you don’t that they realize what’s happened.

Now, after two months of agonizing silence, they get this.

You’re strapped to a metal chair, beaten and bloody, when one of your captors yanks your head up by your hair. He growls something at you in muffled Russian and when you answer him with silence, he spits in your face. You meet his taunting gaze with a severe glare and the man laughs, letting go of you to call someone else over.

He steps in front of the camera, blocking any view of you, but there’s still a clear view of one of his men approaching you with a cattle prod. The man speaks directly to the camera- directly to the 141- his voice almost drowned out by the buzz of the prod and the scream you let out.

The video ends there, fading into jumbled static before starting over again.

“It’s proof of life,” Price sighs, shutting the monitor off. “They’re offering a trade. Intel for the doctor.”

“Can we trace it?” Gaz asks.

“Laswell’s working on it.”

The room falls into silence and Soap can’t help but look at Ghost. He appears calm, standing still with his gaze focused on the monitor, but Soap knows better. There’s nothing in those eyes, Ghost’s mind completely vacant, an empty shell of a man stuck standing before them. With nothing more to add, Ghost turns, walking out of the room without a word- a true statement to his name.

He’s been like this since you disappeared- disassociating so hard he might as well have been taken with you. He broke out of it once, when Gaz suggested changing your status from MIA to KIA.

Gaz’s black eye took almost three weeks to heal and Ghost vanished from the base until it did, returning without an apology and a tension that followed him into every room.

It takes another agonizing week before Laswell comes back with anything, but she delivers more than enough information. Price is barely off the phone with her when the team is gearing up to go and find you.

And, oh, when they find you-

Soap isn’t sure there’s a need for the entire team as Ghost tears a warpath through their enemies. There’s no words, no mercy, no stopping as he cuts down person after person after person. He’s coated in gore and viscera, thick crimson a stark contrast to the bone white of his mask, hands dripping with enemy blood- an angel of death coming to collect.

Soap finds you first while clearing a room as Ghost bludgeons one of the guards to death in the hallway.

You’re huddled in a corner of the cell, leaning against the grimy wall curled in on yourself. Soap lowers his gun, approaching cautiously as though you’re a wild animal, speaking softly, “Doc?”

Soap jumps back as you lunge for him, swinging what looks to be a piece of broken glass. He can feel the sharp sting as you catch his arm, taking several steps back until he’s almost out the door. You move back, pressing yourself against the wall with your hands up; your fingers so tightly squeezed around the shard in your hand, Soap can see the fresh blood sliding down your palm.

“Easy, easy,” he coaxes, hands up, palms facing out as he calls back over his shoulder. “Ghost!”

The man materializes out of thin air, nudging Soap out of the way as he takes in the scene before him. You look like hell, dressed down in a torn shirt and pants with one eye swollen shut and covered in so much dried blood that they can’t tell where your injuries are.

Slowly, Ghost takes a step into the cell.

“Don’t!” you yell, voice hoarse. “Nor- Norilsk, six years ago. We were…we were on a mission and one of our team was KIA. What was the last thing he said to us?” Ghost takes a careful step forward, bloody hands raised.

“Should’ve had that last drink,” Ghost speaks lowly, inching towards you. “Barely got it out through the blood but he never stopped smiling.”

He gets close enough to reach out to you, hands gently wrapping around yours as he eases you into letting go of the glass. It clatters to the floor, snapping in half against the moldy concrete.

“I-I didn’t tell them anything.”

“I know.”

“They tried to get me to, but- but I didn’t-”

“I know.”

“I fought back.”

“I know, love.”

Ghost maneuvers you forward until you’re pressed against his chest, forehead digging into the hard pockets of his tac vest. Soap turns his back, giving the two of you a moment and keeping watch. He can hear Ghost’s low murmurs and the rattling of your voice.

You meet up with Gaz and Price ten minutes later, when you’ve collected yourself enough to separate yourself from Ghost. You roll your shoulders back, biting back the pain to stand as tall as you can. Price sets a hand on your shoulder, giving it a soft, comforting squeeze.

Are you okay?

You reach back where Ghost stands directly behind you. His hand finds yours, squeezing three times. You squeeze back once, then twice, then three times before letting go. You give your best smile, feeling the comforting weight of Ghost behind you as you nod at Price.

I will be.

#simon riley x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #ghost x reader #simon riley #simon ghost riley #modern warfare #modern warfare 2 #mw fics #moth writes #private

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