#|ofcrossroads|chifuyu

[protectivemuses]

@ofcrossroads asked: “I think you kiss better now than you used to…” (Chifuyu to Ryusei in Bonten verse)

Ryusei raised an eyebrow at the comment, arms staying as they were around Chifuyu's waist. In fact, he couldn't help but laugh at it after a moment. "Jeez, I would hope so. It'd be pretty bad if I sucked at it after all this time." There's a playful smirk. "Though I guess that's really just a benefit for you, me being better than I was. Who knows? Maybe one day it'll be hard for you to not to want to kiss me."

[protectivemusesmoving]

❛  do you even notice everyone checking you out?  ❜ (Chifuyu to Ryusei)

"Huh? No. Can't say I did, actually-" He commented, glancing around finally before looking at Chifuyu. "If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were jealous. Oh? Is that it? Is someone jealous?~" There's a smirk as Ryusei playfully bumps his shoulder to Chifuyu's. "Don't worry. None of them are worth my time or worth me looking at them."

[protectivemusesmoving]

Ryusei's eyes slowly make their way for his gaze to meet Chifuyu's at the tone, even watching as Chifuyu chooses to sit next to him. And before he knows it, he feels his head pulled to the other's shoulder, and he feels himself struggling not to break. The burning and blurriness in his eyes and vision are now clear, the dam finally breaking as the tears finally roll down his face. There's no shudder, or gasp of breath, or any sign to make it obvious, but even if just for this moment, he lets himself break. On this bathtub rim, in the quiet of the middle of the night in a bathroom relying on someone for help, he lets himself feel the pain he tries so hard to keep hidden.

The guilt that taints his soul, the regrets that eat at him from the inside out and never seem satiated, knowing they won't be until the day he's dead. Even despite him feeling like the worst person to exist, in this very moment, there's no amount of words he can say to prove how thankful he is for Chifuyu. The fact the other is still kind enough to help him, that he doesn't just turn him away or tell him to never come back or even worse. For a moment, things almost feel like they would be okay. Even if he knows when he steps out of that apartment door again, he'll be right back at his daily war that he was forever doomed to face until the day his heart stopped.

When Chifuyu speaks, Ryusei almost doesn't even notice. 'Do you want some food or a bath?' It's such a simple question, yet somehow, it hurts but in a good way. But he isn't a fool. An idiot, yes. But no fool. Instead, he's shaking his head before lifting his head to try to wipe his face and get himself together. "I've taken enough of your time. I can just wash up real quick, and I can be out of your hair.. I've gone and woke you up, anyways. I don't want to take any more of your time or anything. I can't really say how much I appreciate what you've done for me now as it is."

Is that what Chifuyu asked? No. But how can Ryusei feel okay taking any more of his time when he knows he's slowly ruining his life? Chifuyu's never said it. But Ryusei can't imagine he isn't affecting Chifuyu's life for the worse by now.

Life in Bonten wasn't something Ryusei was new to at this point, having spent years already being molded into what they deemed needed. It was either be useful or be killed. Ryusei isn't sure how he got to Chifuyu's place, but he realizes it when he feels an arm around his shoulders. Even as he's led inside and told to sit on the tub, he isn't there. He's physically there, but not there. Dull eyes watch the motions as Chifuyu moves, as if he's had Chifuyu do this for him a million times. Like it's second nature.

The sharp, intense stinging from the alcohol meeting open wounds feeling dull compared to regret aching his heart. He deserves this. He deserves every ounce of this pain and more, he tells himself. It's the only thing he deserves. Despite the time he's been here already unsure if it's been minutes or even longer, Ryusei finally realizes how dry his throat is from not speaking. "I'm.. I'm sorry.. I.. I didn't even realize I was coming here until you led me in." I didn't know where else to go.

For someone as loud as Ryusei, this time his voice contradicts personality as it stays quiet, barely more audible than a whisper. It's laced with unspoken but obvious guilt, regret, shame. All the feelings that he now lives with that override everything else he can feel. Even the stinging of tears welling in his eyes goes unnoticed by himself. The sign that the dam he tries to keep up, that act of being unphassd and unbothered by things, breaking bit by bit.

He's a monster, he's convinced. That's all he sees in his mind. Someone who doesn't deserve anything other than to be disposed of like trash for no one to ever find. Someone who doesn't deserve love, and especially doesn't deserve the unspoken trust and kindness that someone as bright and kind as Chifuyu still offers him. Even at god-knows-what-hour and becoming a burden. "I'm sorry I woke you up.." Thank you for helping me.

[starjynx]

anon sent: Smash or pass Chifuyu, Akkun?

feat. @ofcrossroads's Chifuyu

❝ Oh definitely smash. ❞ 

[deathfavor]

@ofcrossroads said: ”if you’re gonna contact Kazutora again, don’t you dare do it in my petshop.”(it’s so hard for me to write Chifuyu threatening Hanma because I cringe every time 😭)

 It’s hilarious watching Chifuyu act as if he has any sort of presence or aura about him. He hadn’t even when he was in a gang, much less now. And certainly not compared to Hanma. Hanma stares down at him and lifts an eyebrow – unimpressed but faintly entertained nonetheless if the little quirk at the corner of his lips is anything to go by. It has always been amusing to rile up the shorter man. Like a small dog that could yap but not do any damage despite how much spirit it had.

   “  Why not? “ He asks, and bites back the isn’t a pet store where you should go? comment that would inevitably earn more angry retorts. As fun as he imagines that might be…well, Kisaki hadn’t been the only good one at picking at people’s weaknesses. Hanma just didn’t normally care enough to bother with that sort of thing. He can make an exception for this because it promises to yield some sort of reward for him. “ It’s pretty common for people to do that. Visit cafes, stores, all of that jazz. “

   “  Is it because you’re jealous? “ He grins like a fox that’s feasted on the chickens in a chicken coop, amber eyes glittering with entertainment that he openly expresses. “ Or are you scared? Both? “ A breathy laugh leaves his lips as he shifts his weight backwards, one hand in his back pocket. Probably both if he had to bet money on it. Scared of who he’d chose? “ God, bet that’s it. You’ve had years and what the fuck do you even know? You don’t want me to contact him there because I actually know shit about him? ” And you can’t stomach it? Hanma’s grin grows, sharp and mocking as he peers down at Chifuyu. “ Want me to give you some tips? “ Bet I knew him better at fifteen in a matter of days than you have learned in years.

   Finally though he simply shrugs his shoulders and lets his expression fall back to its more neutral expression other than the cat-like gleam to his gaze. “ Fine. No saying hi to the tiger inside of the pet store. Got it ~ “  He singsongs back. It’s too easy of an acceptance. Hanma never lets things go so easily. “ I’ll just send him a message. How’s that? “ He’s not asking for permission ; he’s just flaunting that he already knows it. Or is at least claiming to know his number. Will that knowledge eat at Chifuyu? He’d hazard a guess to yes.

[ofcorruptminds]

@ofcrossroads sent in from Chifuyu the extra small one: Chifuyu’s looking to his feet then to Draken’s as he scrapes the figure before him. How the fuck is he so tall?! “Draken-kun, do you eat a lot of spinach?”

 Chifuyu stood there all five feet, nothing of him. The question gives him an idea. Time to poke a little fun at the first division vice-captain. He kept a straight face. "Yeah that and drinking raw eggs every morning." Ask a stupid question and you get stupid answer.

[kyukicho]

"I can get behind that deal."

“ No Hanma... ” Sorry, Kazutora. That one's on your own time.

[galaxythixf]

@ofcrossroads said: "You never talk about dating, Hakkai. Is there someone you like?" (Chifuyu)

Dating? He has to think about it for a minute because he hasn't ever really been interested in anyone. Girls just made him too nervous to speak and the thought of getting close to one had never even crossed his mind once. It didn't occur to him that it was unusual but maybe it was? Whenever he thought of dating it was usually within the context of someone else or a movie, but never in regards to himself. "Not really," he shrugs it off, unable to give him a reasonable answer. The only girl he really spoke to was his sister, and he didn't see an issue with keeping it that way.

Admiration was about all he had, and even then that was really only for men. Was there something wrong with him? "Wait, is that something you guys talk about a lot?" Taka didn't talk about it often, at least not to his knowledge and Yuzuha sparingly mentioned anything like that to him lest she risk being teased. Did he want to date people? He couldn't be sure. Suddenly, he feels a little beside himself. Should he be thinking about that?

[nissho-ku]

“bachira meguru! nice to meet'cha, chifu-chan,” bachira leans on the other, grin never leaving him. “say, what are you good at? you look like you play a sport.”

“Matsuno Chifuyu.” He hesitates. What a forward guy. “You?” / @ofcrossroads

[protectivemuses]

[ 𝐇𝐔𝐆 ] My muse hugs yours tightly after not having seen them for a while (RyuFuyu)

Being gone for days at a time wasn't anything new to Ryusei, especially when it came down to him not having anyone to return to at home when he found himself alone. Sometimes, things don't feel different from that until he finds himself entering through a familiar doorway of someone else's apartment that he spends more time in than his own. Well, at least while it was that way.

Now, he's returned back to entering a quiet home, nothing but cold and empty air greeting him. Until he feels a set of arms wrap around him and warmth meet his own. Processing, he realizes Chifuyu is holding him and he wraps his arms around him just as tight in return. He knew giving Chifuyu a key to the new place wasn't a mistake, especially since they had to settle for visits now. "I've missed you," He speaks after moments of silence, voice muffled by the other's shoulder.

It's minutes before he bothers to pull away at all. "Come on. It's late, and I'm sure I've kept you waiting. I didn't know you'd be stopping by tonight, but I can cook up some dinner if you're hungry." He offers, giving a playful ruffle to Chifuyu's hair. "You could've told me you'd be stopping by for a visit tonight. I didn't know when you'd be free, after all."

[protectivemuses]

“You’re kinda hot” (Ryufuyu)

Ryusei blinks, resting his chin on his palm with a huff. "Only kinda? All this time and I only get a 'kinda'? Harsh." It was partly a tease, moreso aside from a bruise to his ego. Especially considering how close they had gotten over the years. "I think you actually almost hurt my feelings." He jokes softly, glancing at Chifuyu now for a reaction. Though there's something Ryusei knows that Chifuyu doesn't, and in a way, he supposes this might make it easier.

But deep down, he knew nothing would make this any easier. The two only had a few days left, and he couldn't even tell Chifuyu. He wanted to, he wanted him to know the truth, but he couldn't bring himself to tell him. Not yet.

[protectivemuses]

💬 + Chifuyu for Ryusei

Send Me 💬 + a Name and My Muse will Talk About That Person

"Want me to talk about Chifuyu, huh? Well, there's not much but yet too much to say at the same time. For starters, he's an idiot. But he's oddly motivational with it. He doesn't know how to back down from a fight, and he always encourages those around him, even if he knows he won't win. He has a good heart though, and that's important. Even when I deserved to be left behind with my past, he still went and fought Kojiro and the others because he refused to give up on someone like me. And I won't tell him to his face, but I owe him a lot."

[protectivemuses]

"When did you get this?" (Ryufuyu)

Ryusei paused with the towel in his hair while drying his hair from the shower he had just taken, glancing over at Chifuyu. He hadn't even thought about Chifuyu not having seen the scar across his back before, especially since he tried to hide it when he could. The scars he got from his work were ones he was never proud of, after all. "I'm assuming you're meaning the one that takes up a chunk of my back," He noted as he felt fingers trace over it after. "Some mission when I first started. I had gotten in one of the getaway cars, and it ended up crashing when the driver took a turn too fast and lost control. He over-corrected, and when the car flipped, the windows shattered and I ended up being ejected. Sent me sliding across the pavement and leave a nasty chunk taken out of my shoulder blade down to my lower back."

It wasn't something he liked remembering. It was stupid, and he didn't need to remember how he had almost died when it became a daily fear of his. "Doctors never stopped telling me how lucky I was, how it could've been so, so much worse." Enough of the gloom. "Anyways. I survived, and now I'm here to still be a pain in your ass," He teased. "I'm thinking about ordering some food. You want anything specific?" Reaching over to grab his shirt, he paused long enough to playfully flick Chifuyu's forehead to make sure he was focused back to reality.

Also because he didn't want to see the expression on Chifuyu's face. Whether pity, shame, or whatever else he tends to feel with Ryusei's current 'profession'.

[protectivemuses]

@ofcrossroads asked: Wordlessly, Chifuyu lays beside Ryusei and rests hid forehead between Ryusei’s shoulders. (Your choice of verse)

Ryusei had found himself having trouble falling asleep, although that was becoming more common than not now given his line of work. Turning to try to look behind him, he blinks in surprise. "You feeling okay?" It's a gentle question, unsure if Chifuyu has gone and gotten into his own head, or if he was seemingly just wanting some sort of affection from him in a rare event.

[protectivemuses]

@ofcrossroads asked: He’s tired. Staying up for hours will do that to someone. And no matter how much Ryusei tries to quell those concerns, Chifuyu still worries. So as soon as Chifuyu hears the door creak open, he’s already hiking tail across the wooden floorboards to the entryway. Almost out of breath his cheeks are flushed, and he’s panting. “Don’t send me vague texts like that!” He exclaims, throwing his arms around Ryusei to both pull him inside and pull him closer as the door shuts behind them. “Saying you don’t know when you’ll be back — I was afraid something happened.” (Bonten)

Ryusei let out an exhale as he had made it to Chifuyu's apartment door. He hardly ever went to his own place anymore, finding more comfort and solace with what he used to know than going and being welcomed by quiet and cold rooms. He's barely opened the door before he glanced up and is grabbed by the other. It took a minute for the words to process, arms gently wrapping around the other in an apologetic but also comforting way. "I didn't think you'd stay up worried. Sorry. Thought you'd assume I was just working late."

He's gently pushing Chifuyu away for a minute to playfully ruffle his hair. "Go to sleep. You look exhausted, and I know you've got work. I'm just gonna go wash up and then probably crash for a few hours on the couch."

[troublehq]

"Riiiiiiight. I was totally paying attention to who you're talking about."

“ I don't trust them. ”