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"Toshiro Is Sexist," "Toshiro Owns Slaves": What's Really Going on With This Guy?
I've seen a lot of debate on whether or not Toshiro is problematic because he's a slave owner or because he's sexist in the context of his crush on Falin. While I do want to examine his relationship to Falin, I'd like to take a few steps back and unpack his upbringing first. We'll dive into the gender and class dynamics he was raised with and how it impacts his behavior in the main storyline.
Like all people, Toshiro is shaped by the environment he grew up in. Toshitsugu, Toshiro's father and the head of the Nakamoto clan, is the most impactful model of authority and manhood in his life. Toshiro does recognize some of his father's flaws and tries to avoid replicating them. But whether or not he emulates or subverts his father's behavior, Toshitsugu is often the starting point for Toshiro's treatment of others, particularly marginalized people.
The Nakamoto clan exists under a patriarchal hierarchy with Toshitsugu at the top. As noted by @fumifooms in their Nakamoto household post, his wife has more authority than Maizuru. She's able to ban Maizuru from parts of their residence, but despite disliking his infidelity, she can't divorce him or stop him from cheating on her. Their marriage is not an equal partnership.
On an interpersonal level, Toshitsugu and Maizuru also have a fraught relationship. While she does seem to care for him, she's often frustrated by his thoughtless behavior.
For example, he drunkenly buys Izutsumi for her ��� without considering how she'll have to raise this child — and invades her room in the middle of the night. When he cryptically says, "It's all my fault," she replies, "I can think of a lot of things that are your fault." She calls him an "idiot" and "believes that [Toshiro] will grow up to be a better clan leader than his father," implying that she takes issue with Toshitsugu's leadership.
Because Maizuru and Toshitsugu are described as being "in an intimate relationship" and "seem[ing] to be lovers," Maizuru appears to be a consensual participant. Still, this doesn't negate the large power imbalance between them as a male noble clan leader and his female retainer. This imbalance introduces an insidious undertone to Maizuru's frustration with Toshitsugu. Like Toshiro's mother, Maizuru doesn't have the agency to do as she pleases in their relationship; he has the ultimate authority. For instance, she doesn't seem to want to raise Izutsumi, but she has to anyway.
While Maizuru's role as Toshitsugu's mistress is significant, she's also the Nakamoto clan's teacher and Toshiro's primary maternal figure. She cares deeply for Toshiro: tailing him, feeding him, and taking responsibility even for his actions as an adult. While it might seem sweet that she cares for him like a son at first, Maizuru was notably fifteen years old at the time of his birth. In the extra comic below, he's six years old and has already been in her care for some time. Even if we're being generous and assuming that she didn't start raising him until he was six, she was still only twenty-one at the time she was parenting her boss/lover's child with another woman.
Maizuru's roles as mistress and maternal figure, in addition to her role as retainer, demonstrate the intersection between gendered and class oppression in the Nakamoto household. Despite her original role being a retainer trained in espionage, Toshitsugu presses her into performing gendered labor for him and eventually, Toshiro. She's expected to be Toshitsugu's lover, perform emotional labor for him as his confidant, care for his child, and carry out domestic tasks like cooking. She says, "Even during missions, I was often dragged into the kitchen." If she was a male servant, I doubt she would have been expected to perform these additional tasks. She can't avoid these tasks either, stating that her "own feelings don't factor into it."
Toshitsugu disregards his wife's and Maizuru's desires and emotions to serve his own interests. Because he has societal power over them as a nobleman and in Maizuru's case, her master, neither woman can escape their position in the household hierarchy.
As a result, Toshiro grew up within a structure where men and male nobility, in particular, wield the most societal power. The hierarchical nature of his household and society discourages everyone, including him as a clan leader's eldest son, from questioning and disrupting the existing hierarchy.
The other Nakamoto household members also internalize its sexist, classist power dynamics.
For example, Hien expects that she and Toshiro will replicate the uneven dynamics of the previous generation, regardless of her personal feelings. She sees her and Toshiro's relationship as paralleling Maizuru and Toshitsugu's relationship; she is the closest woman to Toshiro and his retainer, so she's shocked when Toshiro doesn't attempt to begin an intimate relationship with her. Notably, she doesn't have actual feelings for him. Her expectations are centered around the household's precedent of placing emotional, sexual, domestic, and child-rearing labor onto the female servants without any regard for their personal desires.
Hien also probably knows that her position in the household will improve if she is Toshiro's lover because she's seen it improve Maizuru's position. However, the fact that being the future clan leader's lover is the closest proximity she, as a female servant, has to power further reveals the gendered, class-based oppression she and the other women live under.
It's important to note that the Nakamoto clan bought Benichidori, Izutsumi, and Inutade as slaves, so they have less power and agency than Maizuru and Hien. The clan further dehumanizes Izutsumi and Inutade as demi-humans; their enslavement contains an additional layer of racialization.
Toshiro isn't oblivious to the gendered, class, and racial power dynamics of his household. He tries to distance himself from participating in its exploitative power structure. He walls himself off from Hien, who he's known since childhood, to avoid replicating his father's behavior and making his servant into his lover. He disapproves of his father's enslavement of Izutsumi and Inutade, and he lets Izutsumi go when she runs away in the Dungeon.
But does any of this absolve him of his complicity in his household's sexist, classist power dynamics and racialized slavery?
The short answer is absolutely not.
Despite his distaste for his father's exploitation of his servants and slaves, Toshiro still uses them. He refers to his party as "his retainers," and he has them fight and perform domestic tasks for him. You could argue that Toshiro doesn't like to and thus, doesn't regularly use his servants and slaves. In the context of him asking his retainers to help him rescue Falin, Maizuru says, "The only time he ever made any sort of personal request was for this task." But it shouldn't matter whether exploitation is a regular occurrence or not for it to be considered harmful. Toshiro asking Maizuru to cook him a meal still constitutes asking his female servant to perform gendered labor for him. He's also very accustomed to her grooming and dressing him.
Maizuru sees feeding, washing, and even advising Toshiro romantically as fulfilling Toshitsugu's orders to care for his son. They aren't fulfilling a "personal request." But just because her labor has been deemed expected and thereby devalued doesn't mean that it isn't labor or that she isn't performing it.
Maizuru's dynamic with Toshiro is also complicated by her role as his maternal figure. She loves him and wants to take care of him, and she doesn't have a choice in the matter. During Toshiro's childhood, the onus was on Toshitsugu to cease exploiting his lover and release her from servitude, but Toshiro is now an adult man. Seeing as how Maizuru defers to his wishes and calls him "Young Master," they still have a power imbalance that he's passively maintaining. Ideally, he would not ask anything of her until he has the authority to release her from servitude.
Throughout the story, Toshiro acts as if he has no agency and quietly disapproving of his father's actions absolves him of his participation in maintaining oppressive dynamics. While his father still ranks higher than him, he's essentially his father's heir. He has much more power than Maizuru, the highest-ranked servant. At the very least, he could leave his slave-owning household.
Unfortunately, his refusal to confront injustice is consistent with his character's major flaw: he does not express his opinions, desires, or needs. While this character trait obviously hurts his friendships, it also furthers his complicity in the injustices his household runs on.
Toshiro's relationship with eating food — the prevailing metaphor of the series — also parallels his relationship with confronting injustice. Maizuru mentions that he was a sickly child, so the act of eating may have been physically uncomfortable for him. As an adult, his refusal to eat crops up during his rescue attempt of Falin. Denying himself food might have been punishment for not accomplishing important tasks like rescuing Falin and/or a way to maintain control over something in his life when he felt like he'd lost control over the rest of it, again in the context of losing Falin. (Note: I suggest reading this post on Toshiro's disordered eating by @malaierba.)
But he cannot and does not avoid consuming food forever.
Similarly, Toshiro keeps his distance from his retainers and tries not to use them until the Falin situation occurs. His efforts to avoid exploiting his retainers amount to inaction — things he doesn't ask of them or do to them. But his inaction does nothing to dismantle the existing hierarchy that places his retainers under his authority, denies them agency, and often marginalizes them as not only servants or slaves but as women, and he ends up using them as servants and slaves anyways.
Returning to the narrative's themes of consumption, Toshiro cannot avoid eating just as he cannot avoid perpetuating the exploitative system of his household. The Nakamoto clan consumes the labor and personhood of those lower in the hierarchy. The retainers' labor as spies and domestic servants is the foundation of the clan's existence. Thus, the clan consumes their labor to sustain itself.
Within this hierarchy, the retainers' personhood is also consumed and erased. As Izutsumi describes, they are given different names and stripped of their agency to reject orders or leave. Maizuru and Hien also say their feelings are irrelevant in the context of Toshitsugu's and Toshiro's wants and needs. Both women are expected to comply with whatever is most beneficial and comfortable for the noblemen. Clearly, despite Toshiro's detachment from his household's functions, these social structures remain in place and harm the women under him.
Although we know the Nakamoto clan has male retainers, the choice to highlight the female retainers seems intentional. We're asked to interrogate how not only being a servant or a slave in a noble household impacts a person's life and agency, but how being a woman intersects with being a member of some of the lowest social classes.
Toshiro only distances himself from his father's behaviors of infidelity and exploitation so long as it doesn't take Toshiro out of his comfort zone. He doesn't free his slaves. He's far too comfortable with his female retainers performing domestic labor for him, and he barely acknowledges their efforts; they're shocked when he thanks them for helping him save Falin. He hasn't unpacked his sexist (or classist or racist) biases because he perpetuates his household's oppressive hierarchy throughout the narrative. Considering all of this, he inevitably brings this baggage to his interactions with Falin.
Falin is presumably one of the first women he's had extended contact with that isn't his relative or his family's servant. Because of his trauma surrounding his father and Maizuru sleeping together, he understandably falls for a woman as disconnected as possible from his father and his clan. He seems to genuinely like Falin, respects her boundaries, and graciously accepts her rejection. His behavior towards her is overall kind and unproblematic.
But if Falin had gone with him, she would've likely been devalued and sidelined like the other women of the Nakamoto household. No matter how much he loves Falin, simply loving her cannot replace the difficult work of unlearning his sexism. Love, of course, can and should be accompanied by that work, but by the close of the narrative, we gain little indication that Toshiro acknowledges or seeks to end his part in exploiting and devaluing women and other marginalized people.
A spark of hope does exist. Toshiro expressing his feelings to Laios and Falin suggests that his time away from home has encouraged him to speak up more. Breaking his habit of avoidance may be the first step towards acknowledging his complicity in systems of injustice and moving towards dismantling them.
Special thanks to my very smart friend @atialeague for bringing up Toshitsugu's relationship with Maizuru and the replication of dynamics of consumption and class! <3
#toshiro nakamoto#maizuru#hien#toshitsugu nakamoto#falin touden#izutsumi#inutade#benichidori#shuro#dungeon meshi#dunmeshi meta#dunmeshi analysis#quite literally free my girls#i got so sad after finding that parallel between maizuru and hien both saying their feelings don't matter#reading maizuru's character bio and how she's a brilliant woman#but she's stuck w toshiro's dad like#i'm toshitsugu's number one hater he better watch out#also thinking about how toshiro looked up to maizuru not even his own parents until he found out about maizuru and his dads relationship#that's devastating bro#im entering my clickbait title era LOL i was told my prev titles were too academia pilled and boring sounding#i think i want to write about izutsumi's and inutade's relationships w gender next#delicious in dungeon#dunmeshi#*mine#*meta
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i saw this tweet and found it interesting for two reasons. one is that some people base how good cartoon network would be to toh by how it treated su, and despite the fact that su’s treatment by the network was considered poor at the time, now its thought to be exceptionally good in comparison to modern shows.
two is how exactly su got impacted by a limited budget. a common criticism is how characters like connie, peridot, and lapis are left out of missions. but balancing a lot of characters is not only hard but also costly (extra animation, extra voices—it’s been revealed that the show is limited to a set number of characters per episode otherwise they’re over budget). animation mistakes are not uncommon since retakes cost extra. the entire reason the original show got cut short was due to loss of funding!
#i don’t know if pay rates differ per networks#but a.ivi and s.urrashu have said that they needed to work outside of su in order to make sufficient funds#it only makes me wonder what other ways su suffered from a lower budget#that we as the audience never got to see#in the vein of the too-little characters complaint#another part of that is that low-stakes episodes should’ve been abt the main cast instead of the townies#like last one out of beach city and too short to ride vs restaurant wars and kiki’s pizza delivery service#i definitely see that especially since that isn’t budget related#nor would it seem to be network related (even if cn had an ‘episodic episodes’ quota it could still be abt the gems#(another side note: /would/ cn even have a requirement that the show make episodes that can be watched standalone?#this is a question for the people who were around when su was airing#what episodes often got rerun?#was it the townie eps or the lore eps?#for example i heard that su once did a ‘peridot event’ where they just reran peridot episodes#which had eps that skip around in the show#did they even care about airing the story so that it made sense anyways?#id get it if the low stakes townie episodes were the ones getting rerun))#but i have such a boring view on that which is i think it’s simply because the creators like townie eps#like in interviews r.ebecca s.ugar has said she’s the type to be really invested in background characters#answers in interviews have been crafted in ways to hide what’s really going on though tbf#prime example of this is rebecca and ian saying the wedding being interrupted was meant to follow the common trope#when later in the art book they said that it was bc cn rejected the ep bc it ‘wasn’t interesting enough’#both could simultaneously be true! it’s a psychology thing though where people make up nice-sounding explanations behind what they create#in retrospect because they want it to be thought out in such a nice way they believe in it#the bigger problem is that not matter how many episodes there are of them#it can be hard for ppl to be invested in the townies the same way they are invested in the main cast#i’m sure that a million writers have made surefire advice on how to get an audience to care about characters#but off the top of my head i think it’s because 1. most don’t have strong motivations to get truly invested in#(exception is ronaldo but people find him too annoying to care about him)#okay i had more points and explanations but i hit the tag limit and idk if anyone is actually reading this so bye
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So often, twink death is framed as a bad thing. However, the "twink death" for trans men* is frankly one of the most healing things you will bear witness to (pun intended).
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#nonbinary#honestly i hated being called a twink pre-t because so many people treated me like... lesser for it?#like... 'i think you are effeminate (and less of a man)... but i /guess/ you're still a man🙄! hope that helps' is how it sounded to me#and so often it seems like 'twink death' is just... fear of aging in a world that hates the realoties of the human body#i have compassion for the fear of aging however it will pretty much always be harmful to the person experiencing it...#...in that they too will age. no matter what you do to prevent aging it will still happen...#...i don't think fear is the fault of the individual - it's a systemic issue. however i think it's needless suffering...#...you certainly do not have to /like/ aging and it can truly suck at times. i just want people to think about why they fear it y'know?#anyway that's what i think motivates this apprehensive attitude about people and how they change and whatnot#though my twink death isn't me becoming a bear (in the future who knows but for now not so much)
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FITF LIVE the DIY bonus tracks (RIP covers and Lucky Again official live versions😪)
~will update with more, but these are the ones I'd already sorted out for me to have; requests for other missing tracks accepted and added on if people want~ 505 live from Cardiff 7 live from Rio de Janeiro Night Changes live from Cincinnati* Back To You live Lucky Again live from Chicago** Beautiful War from Live From London Megamix live from Austin (yes this one WILL be on the record but who wants to wait I love getting to listen to this whenever I want) *beginning is a little bit messy but best audio throughout I found... plus the way he says 'beautiful!' in the middle is 🥵 **I could not find as good a sound quality version of this as I would like at all :( if anyone has a better version please send it!!
#not that it matters but I'm assuming the somewhat unplanned seeming decision to pop into a studio in Prague#and do a recorded version of pop punk BTY came about when they sorted out that it wouldn't make this record#anyway ones I'm gonna look for to add to this: WDBHG TTD... what else?? remind me and I'll do my best to find a decent version#ooh new version of JHO maybe#obviously these will sound different than the real album versions which will have been recorded directly#from the stream out of his mic rather than what comes out of the speakers#but tbh some of them sound gooood... that 7 version is 🔥🔥#505 too... and it's imperfect but listenign to the megamix at all is just 🥰🥰🥰#louis tomlinson
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Father Mulcahy being a spin the bottle champion is something that's so important to me actually.
#He def got drunk and somehow convinced everyone else at the 4077th to play and then rigged it so he could kiss Hawkeye#Except everyone else kept leaving the game until he and Hawk were the only two playing but Francis was so drunk that he didn't notice#But it didn't really matter bc Hawk was the only one he wanted to kiss anyway#Hawk can take his alcohol way better though and he actually cares about Mulcahy so he probs told him no and just put him to bed#Maybe in the Swamp so he could keep and eye on him#Or maybe he took Francis back to his own tent but Francis just grabbed onto him and wouldn't let go and then immediately fell asleep so#Hawk couldn't escape#Which could go one of several ways in the morning#Depending on things like whether Hawk managed to extract himself or not and how much Mulchay remembers#I'd like to think it ended happily for them though#I'm def thinking too much into this but he just sounded so proud of his spin the bottle skills and it was adorable#I love him#Father Mulcahy#MASH#S10E11: Follies of the Living Concerns of the Dead#This is all Alan Alda's fault how dare he write and direct things (which inevitably all make me go insane)#Hawkahy
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Old doodle I did in August. It was actually on the same file I drew Firefighter Gadget on and I don't remember the context at all! Were they related? Who knows? Not me! Even though I drew it! Because my memory sucks and August was kind of a blur of Things Happening. So was September actually.
Anyways, he's gonna bite that gay little finger right off you tease.
#sonic fanart#sth#infidget#rookinite#infinite the jackal#gadget the wolf#rookie the wolf#minturts#not that he wouldn't like it if he bit him honestly--#i wonder if I should make a separate tag for sketches... actually no that sounds like a lot of effort#also probably just another reason for my brain to commit to 'sketches aren't worth posting' which I'm trying to stop doin#I will never draw Infinite's mask the same no matter how many times I draw it#I keep lying to myself saying I will but I'm a lying liar#he will forever be vaguely creature shaped and weird with his mask sorry not sorry I'm too lazy to heavily reference it each time
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While I'm not one for generational conflict cuz there's no war but the class war so to speak, I can't help but think that a "perfect millennial comedy routine" probably oughta consist of a little bit more substance than repackaged "kids use weird slang these days," along with askin to be given some common decency in accounta introducing Facebook and Instagram, plus also bein the boss.
Now folks I may just be a simple country baked salted ham, but it seems ta me that listin off four o the worst things in the world today ain't exactly any generation's idea of empathetic. Ain't a doubt in my mind we're more like than not cross put near three or four decades, jest sayin don't trust too well someone askin you to smile along while they insult ya and tell ya how ta act and they think ya oughta be quiet n grateful for a handful o garbage cuz they invented takin a shit.
But I don't know, don't listen to an old coot like me.
#i think ive seen that routine too many times i cant take it anymore its just repackaged kids these days in a shiny coat of irony#yelling at clouds#no but seriously gen z et all someone going like ooky booky and saying your slang sounds made up and weird probably isn't your friend#they're just someone two steps removed from a blue hair and pronouns joke#it doesn't matter how old or young just knowing tiktok exists doesn't make someone trustworthy
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My Personal Headcanon On Why Amy's Love For Sonic Died Down Lately (and their dynamic)
When they were younger, Amy's love for Sonic was pretty extreme, and Sonic was, understandable, uncomfortable for the most part. He knows she means well, but that girl needs to calm down.
She can fight, but sometimes her hammer could only stun her enemies for a while. (It took her a long time to get rid of that robot that has been chasing her around Station Square.) She wasn't fully independent yet, even if she fought on her own a couple of times.
She often follows Sonic and his friends around. She is part of the team, but she was not a strong as she is now at the time yet.
She admires Sonic. A LOT. And Sonic knows that. Obviously, he could only run away from something like that, since he is NOT ready for that kind of thing, and whether Amy takes the hint or stop, she still loves him.
...BUT, I think things were slightly starting to change between her and Sonic after Lost World.
Remember this line?
You remember that? Okay, okay. Here's another totally unrelated question:
Before the events of Lost World, when was the last time Amy said "I love you" to Sonic out loud?
...YEP. 😈 (Unless I'm missing something, let me know lmao)
As more games and adventures come out, the characters get slightly older, and Amy is 12 to 13 now, and she is most certainly at that age where her body starts to change, but especially on how she views Sonic.
She knows she loves Sonic, but it was this moment during her change where she actually wanted to admit that she loves him.
I believe that Amy was all about sharing her affection to him not through confessions, but through obvious hints. Sonic totally got it, and there was no need to confess. Sonic knows she loves her.
...But she never said it. And she almost did, but she never did again for a while.
I think this was the moment in her life where, oh, God, she actually loves Sonic. SHE LOVES HIM, WHAT.
And she was looking back at all the times she had with Sonic that she can now see were unpleasant to Sonic (At least that's what she thinks) and that's probably why she isn't so expressive about her love to him than how she used to back then.
She wasn't sure what to do with this realization, and sets aside it for a while, and nearly stayed as her casual, peppy self... until the Eggman War happened.
During the 6 months of being with the Resistance, fighting Eggman's army all day and all night, all she can think of was Sonic.
She dreams that he still with not just her, but with her friends. She just wanted to see Sonic again, she just wants to be with her hero again.
But I'd like to think that she was also thinking about how she used to treat Sonic back when they were younger, how Sonic would almost always run away from her whenever she asks him out, or always look so uncomfortable whenever she gets so close to him.
Cringing at those memories big time, she wanted to change and hopefully when Sonic is okay and comes back, she can be better for him.
...Or will he still find her uncomfortable regardless? Would he even be happy to see her at all if he did survive?
But, hold on! She can't just give up her love for Sonic! He made her who she is today! A peppy, nature-loving, hammer-swinging, confident, brave... loud-mouth... annoying... Sonic obsessed... weak... pathetic... lonely little girl.
If she gives up on Sonic, it'll be like she gave up on the one hedgehog who saved her life. If she didn't she'll still be the same ol' Amy.
I also like to think she had parents a long while before she met Sonic, and was even expecting a little sister, but a robot invasion happened from where she was and attacked her parents and instead of trying to save them, after getting hurt, she ran away, hoping that they'll come back okay. But they never did.
She was all alone, and needed someone, a friend, a new family, someone who will hold her hand, anyone, to be there for her. But she was ignored by lots, and at that point, she's better off by herself, but still longed for company.
Eventually though, her tarot cards told her her future hero, and there might be hope after all. She encountered Sonic, held onto the belief of the cards tight, and the rest is history.
So, with that headcanon in mind, not only did Amy loose her parents that she didn't save because of her cowardliness (she was only so little at the time that happened) and also Sonic, who she thought will be her only hope, but now gone.
She doesn't even care if he did come back, he'd probably hate her now after everything she did to him, always talking about their "future wedding" or forcing him to go to Twinkle Park.
For the last few months of the war, it was nothing but Amy mentally beating herself up for either refusing to change or moving on, and they are both not fine choices.
She loves Sonic, but he does not love her, and she finally, finally realized it. And it's probably for the best if no body loved her at all.
But of course Sonic did survive and all of her worries wash away in an instant, she's just not expressive about her love for Sonic AT ALL now, since she's still worried about it but rather not mention it to Sonic because it doesn't matter.
If Sonic doesn't love her, then her feelings don't matter to him, and according to Amy herself, that is okay.
But also, I'd like to think that Sonic was thinking about his friends a lot up in the Death Egg for the past months, sometimes it's Tails (worried for his safety), sometimes it's Shadow (because he's wondering why he would join Eggman.) At some point, for a few days, Amy was in his mind the longest, and he felt bad about how he thought he was rude and pushy to her.
He wondered if she's not thinking about it too much, and if she is, will she give up on him? Yeah, he doesn't feel the same and still not looking for a relationship, but it's so strange but interesting how anyone could ever like someone like Sonic the Hedgehog. Amy was never afraid to show that, and she probably might be now.
He couldn't help but feel guilty. They were kids when she was like this, but he was so... arrogant at the time too. Not a lot happened at the time yet. He'd always have trouble expressing how much he value his friends, until he shattered the Paradox Prism. (I'd like to think Prime took place before Forces. It makes sense.)
She is such a sweet girl, and he probably made her believe that he didn't care for her. Just because he doesn't feel the same, that doesn't mean he hates her at all.
He wished he never ran away from Amy... Worrying for his little bro and wishing to be a good person for Amy was when Sonic cried in the Death Egg for the first and only time.
Frontiers, in my opinion, is kind of confirming their dynamic now. Sonic is a lot more sincere and kinder to Amy and she is not all hyperactive and lovey to Sonic. There is probably a real reason for this now.
They are both hiding their feelings from them, and they are both unaware of this. Amy, hiding her mental issues from Sonic, and Sonic, hiding his guilt away from Amy.
None of those things are important now. Sonic is with Amy and Amy is with Sonic. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
They don't care if they'll ever be something more when they get older. None of that matters anymore. They are here with each other. They can be finally be better for each other now.
Maybe someday they'll both talk about it, but for now, the present is important. They care about each other too much to think about it right now.
It's the kind of love that is unbreakable. It doesn't even have to be romantic. It's just love. Love is important for everyone, in any form. It's something Sonic and his friends need. And especially Sonic and Amy.
Amy Rose is the living embodiment of love, and without her, a lot would go downhill for Sonic and co. Heck, if it weren't for her, Shadow wouldn't have never remembered Maria's promise, which lead him to save the world with Sonic, before he temporarily disappeared from their lives for a while.
She is always there to lend a helping hand for anybody, even bad guys like Metal Sonic, and despite what she had been through, both in Forces and headcanon wise, she still fights back, even without her hammer.
She will pick you back up on your feet, reminding you that you are important and that you are loved, and that you should never give up. It's pretty much the words of encouragement she herself needed also...
She is still the happy, hyper, butt-kicking hedgehog we all know and love, but she still need someone to pick her back up on her feet after so long. Thankfully, she has her friends and her blue hero. The hero who made her who she is today.
I think Amy has no idea how important she thought she is, but Sonic does. Sonic knows fully well how important she is to a lot of people. It's about time he returns the favor to her. It's his turn to remind her how much a lot of people love her.
How much he loves her.
And I feel like The Murder of Sonic the Hedgehog was the moment where their dynamic really shined, but also the starting point of their relationship not only healing, but also the next chapter of what's to come for them.
Everyone, friends old and new, gathered around for a special birthday. A birthday for the confident, unshakable, and radiant Amy Rose.
It was such a special moment in Amy's life. After years of chasing and following the people she look up to, she is part of the team, but most importantly, she is part of the family.
She is fully realized as someone more than just a fangirl, but someone strong, courageous, creative, kind and a big inspiration for others.
I feel like this moment here...
-is where Amy is eternally grateful to call her friends her family. A family she thought she'll never have again. She's not alone anymore, and as long as they're by her side, she'll never will be again.
Her chasing days are over. She's finally caught up to them. She's finally home.
And it's all thanks to Sonic.
If it weren't for him, she'd probably be alone forever. Her past moments with Sonic might be embarrassing to look back on for a while, but they are good memories regardless, because they involve him.
Sonic saved her life in more ways than one, and despite everything, he's grateful to have her too.
He cares about her. He really does... And in her eyes, that all she needed to know. As long as Sonic loves her in his own way, she'll be happy.
Amy hasn't given up on Sonic. As long as Amy always supports him, he'll be happy.
Maybe sometime in the future, they can talk about their problems, but that's a story for another time. At this point, they need to. Right now, they are happy. They are okay.
They are here for each other. They are finally better for each other now.
"You guys won't ever leave me, right?"
"Wouldn't dream of it."
#piko rambles#sonic the hedgehog#amy rose#Meant to be platonic but I don't care if you tag as ship lol#I've been meaning to post something like this for the longest time now but never really got into posting it-#-because you guys REALLY hate seeing these two together for some reason.#Well not for SOME reason. There are valid reasons why you don't ship them. Everyone has valid reason why they don't ship this or that.#But sometimes those reasons can just sound so petty to me. Like the reason why is because Amy is a stalker or Sonic hates her which is FALS#Also those age gap arguments are understandable but so goddamn annoying sometimes. Maybe when they hit their late teens or early twenties-#then they can be together if they want to. Besides a good percentage of Sonic ships are better off if they waited til they're old enough im#I love them regardless of whether they're just friends or an awkward older cringe fail couple lmao#But them being just friends and hiding away all their emotions towards each other just to keep them safe and happy with them- 😭😭😭#Son/adow is my favorite ship of all time and sonamy is my favorite childhood ship/platonic ship because they both have one thing in common.#ANGST 😀#I've been thinking about Sonic and Amy's dynamic as of late and MAN-#Mixed with some personal headcanons of mine and their dynamic as of late just makes me so emotional.#Sonic and Amy have gotten so close now and it's so sweet but so heartbreaking at the same time when you think about it.#I'm so happy they are getting along better and being there for each other but there is so much to dissect here. So much to think about.#I might be a little silly but Amy losing her parents and being alone for so long and being the reason why she's always hanging onto Sonic-#-explains SOOOOOOOOO much about her. At least that's my headcanon for WHY that is.#Amy with abandonment issues speaks to me on a personal level. I'm always afraid of being forgotten or left behind by my family.#I sometimes feel like I'm not good enough no matter how hard I try. I do not blame Amy. I relate to her a lot. It's one of the many reasons#-why Amy is my favorite character besides Sonic and Shadow.#She fights hard to prove she's a valuable member of the team and hates getting left behind but despite all that she wasn't afraid to-#-express herself and her love for people. But after the Eggman War there was some changes that made her less expressive about her love.#Yeah she still loves Sonic but she doesn't admit it because none of that matters anymore and she thought that not being loved by Sonic#-is better than being loved since she nearly wasted her life loving someone who she thought has constantly bothered. 🥲#But I think after TMoStH I think she'll be less afraid of being expressive about it. She and Sonic are just so caring for each other 😭#I love these two way too much that when I think about them for too long I'll start SOBBING 😭😭 I'M EVEN SOBBING RIGHT NOW LMAO
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Actively disturbed by the fact Dan and Phil are t'hy'la (Vulcan word used to indicate people with a close bond; essentially translates to a combination friend, brother, and lover. Used most often to reference the characters Kirk and Spock as something like soulmates or spouses)
#dan and phil#dan and phil games#daniel howell#dan howell#phil lester#amazing phil#posts that would send william shatner into a rage (envy?) coma#ranch metaphor#I cant believe we have an actual pair of t'hy'la in the real world in the year of our Lord 2024#or the closest equivalent two humans can be in reality#they're soulmates your honor#the aziracrow/ineffable husbands cosplay has been living in my head rent free since Halloween#going to the live show after ten years of being a phan is an experience unlike any other#it's the opposite of what i felt when i logged into tumblr dot com in November of 2020 and got body slammed by destiel one final time#literally never have two people been more *gestures at them* than these two are#i know it sounds like a shipping thing but its not#whether theyre together or not has no baring on the fact that they're literally t'hy'la#and i know what some of yall are thinking#how would it not matter if lover is a part of the translation#ask kirk and spock#something are just#more than words can describe#phan#i meant bearing but I've added too many tags to go back now#my point is our labels are irrelevant even this one#it's about the two people themselves#star trek#star trek tos#t'hy'la
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guys I have a question,,,, when did you realized you were loved, like truly loved, by someone?
#romantic or platonic or friendship or partnership all kinds#a moment when someone did something or say something no matter how small that you got that realization of ‘oh. this person loves me’#like truly. they care for me. that sort of love#so if you are so kind to indulge me and let me know I’m really curious about it#this came to me because I care about love but to be loved? I care so much about that too no matter how selfish it might sound and yet I#somehow overlooked and I missed it ironic I know
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here's my top 3 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐕/𝐓𝐖𝐎𝐒 voices . 𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐃 𝐌𝐎𝐋𝐋 is my personal voice claim for my 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐘 and these are in order in terms of my personal favorites because I feel Joh and Troy are pretty stellar too. You gotta make that 𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐕𝐄𝐘 voice pretty and the 𝐓𝐖𝐎 𝐅𝐀𝐂𝐄 voice like he ate glass and smoked 6 packs of cigarettes.
#◖𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐨𝐦𝐲 𝐨𝐟 𝐨𝐫𝐝𝐞𝐫 & 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐨𝐬 / 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬.#i really love when harvs voice is as interesting as twos like both voices matter#and i always felt harv sounds nice with a tv voice while twos is raspy and growly#twos has the new yorker accent that harv tries so desperately to hide too comes from their pops
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Praise no power higher than your own code
#ULTRAKILL#V1#V1 Ultrakill#cw:#Blood#Wanted to screw around with a flat brush I completely forgot I made a while back... and yeah that's it#Not supposed to be anything revolutionary just needed to get it out of my system#And also I'm chronically indecisive so have two alt palettes too#Uhhhh usually my tags are longer. What else can I decide to not shut up about#Caption is from a slide on an Ultrakill/Dante's Inferno powerpoint I made that I went back to and said ''wait that sounds cool actually''#(It wasn't cool on a powerpoint though that was meant to be pretty matter-of-fact. Need to cut the prose sometimes)#Anyway yeah that's it. Tumblr isn't letting me add alt IDs hopefully it will in the mobile editor#Hrokkall Art
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RealAgeAU drabble - Moving
Hello I am back and I got another idea for this little silly au that I have @spotaus to thank for for the original idea :3 Though I think this may be officially becoming one of my AUs hahahaha
First part Prev Part Next part
Also yes. I know it would work better to number these uploads but also i am not writing these in any set order so it will become miserable for all of us if i number them because either they will be out of order or I will have to rework all the names and I am already editing links I don't need that extra energy in my life.
ANYWAY! :D
Next part! The one I lovingly clal in my head - The one where the gang finds a more permanent temporary home. (also yes. Before this they all speed-run the whole Parental bonding and emotional bonding to the idea of having a babybones. Which honestly can and probably will make four different drabbles)
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Horror stares at the door and wonders once again how he got to this point.
Well, no. That is a lie. He knows exactly how he got to his point.
He glances over his shoulder where the other four at hiding off to the side. Out of view from the doorway but still visable for Horror if he looks just right. Seems like Dust won the discussion, again, and is holding Nightmare, again.
Horror wants to say it is surprising how quickly they all just... accepted the situation they got into but he really isn't. Monsters are weird like that. Forced adoption is not that wild all things considered when you are talking about beings made of magic and emotions.
Horror stares at the door and raises his hand before knocking twice.
He really hadn't wanted to do this but they have no other choice. As he waits he can't help but think back to what made them decide this.
Cross walks from side to side "That was way to close! That was the third time we came across the Stars with Nightmare out. Third!"
Killer nods from where he is sitting wiht the sleeping Nightmare in his lap "Yeah no kidding. It is annoying as shit that they are hunting us."
Dust shrugs "Not surprising. Nightmare 'disappeared' after all. We are their only lead."
Killer grins "We were lucky Cross managed to lie his way out of the last one." and he shoots Cross a wink.
Cross sputters "I panicked!"
Killer grins and winks "Sure sure daddy crossy."
Horror holds up his hands between his two... co-parents "This is not the time. We need to figure out where we can go." and he thinks things over.
Cross sighs "I don't get how they keep finding us!"
Dust huffs as he packs their bags "We go to too little universes. Makes it easy for Ink and Dream to pick us out because they recognise us personally."
Killer frowns "Meaning. we need a big universe?" he taps his chin "But also mostly positive as we still don't know how obvious Nightmare would be otherwise."
Cross frowns "I think it will be fine. He can't feel the balance anymore right? And no one seems to have a reaction to him like they had before nor how people have a reaction to Dream's aura thing. Maybe with the corruption gone he really is just... ex-guardian now?"
Killer groans "I hope so. I am not a fan of child labor."
That is when it hits him. Horror sits up "I think I know a place."
All of them turn to him and he immediantly regrets saying anything. See? This is why he normally tries to limit what he says.
Either way. Here they are now and Horror prays this works. Please. They need one thing to work in their favor.
The door opens and a gasp "Horror! It has been ages! It is great to see you. How have you been?" Crop smiles at him.
Horror steels his nerves. Come on. Too much hangs on this moment "Hey Crop. Nice to see you. I am... okay. How are you?"
Crop frowns at him instantly "You sure? You don't sound okay. Trouble at home?"
Horror chuckles "Kinda? Not exactly. Euh... Can't go back to that place now?"
Crop frowns "Why? Need a place to stay? I got a spare room."
Okay yes! this is going great! just... gotta make sure he knows.
Horror nods "I do need a room. Not just for me though..." Crop starts to frown and Horror raises his hands "Just temporarily!"
Crop frowns "Did... something go wrong?"
Horror pauses and thinks this through once more. He trusts Crop. Crop has never been anything but kind even when Horror had been an ass. Even when he had to once drag Dust here to get healing before they could make the jump back home.
Horror looks to the side and he sees the others just beyond the treeline, hidden in shadows and waiting. Crop takes a look as well but he can't quite spot them. Crop looks back up at him.
Horror takes a deep breath "You need... to promise me, no not just promise you need to swear. That what you are about to learn will not leave this universe."
Crop frowns as he immediantly looks uncomfortable. It is the reaction a promise gets from most of them. But Crop also shoots him a considering look before he nods. He holds out a hand "I swear and promise I will not share the about to be giving information. UNLESS! It endangers anyone." and he waits.
Horror stares at the hand and thinks. That... That is fine right? That should be fine. Nightmare being a child doesn't endanger anyone. Only them and Nightmare. Horror nods and shakes the hand.
Crop nods and steps aside "Come inside. I bet you will be more comfortable explaining there." he glances at the forest "Do your... friends? Want to come in too?" a guess clearly. probably on multiple fronts.
Horror shakes his skull "Not yet. Need to know your answer and reaction first." He turns to the forest and makes a signal to wait a bit longer. He sees a thumbs up shot his way back. Probably Killer. He never bothered with the signals they had learned together.
Crop nods as he steps aside and Horror walks in, having to duck slightly for the door. The door closes behind him and Horror sees the small living room with fireplace.
Crop leads him to the kitchen "Lets talk there. I will get some tea."
A few minutes later they are both seated and with a cup of tea. Crop looks at him expectingly.
Horror takes a deep breath and takes out their most valuable resourch. The Dreamtale book. And places it on the table. Crop frowns at it before looking at Horror.
Horror nods to it "It will help explain... Very long story short... Nightmare was never an adult. He was a child with a magical shield of some type. That magic has ran out."
Crop stares at him for a moment, then he pulls the book closer and starts reading it. He pauses at the title before opening it.
And now he waits.
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Crop sits wiht his skull in his hands. Horror just sits across from him, with his empty cup of tea. Crop's own cup has grown cold a long time ago. Horror just waits for anymore questions but Crop hasn't said anyhting in the last ten minutes.
Horror looks back at the book and sees that Crop has turned the pages back to the one with the drawing of Nightmare's head being cracked open. The image makes a very clear show on how small Nightmare was compared to the ones attacking him.
Horror still thinks the book doesn't do it justice. Nightmare is much smaller in person than the picture makes him seem. The cracks had been much worse than the picture showed. But it is the closest they got.
Crop finally sighs and speaks. He doesn't look away from the picture "I don't... Know a lot about this whole... multiverse stuff. It isn't my place at all. And that is fine." he pauses for a moment "But this... You are telling me... That the one being that had everyone afraid. That everyone saw as a demon. Is a child... is this child?"
Horror nods before he explains more "Nightmare... gained a lot of magic and powers when he ate those apples. At least that is what the story implied. We haven't managed to get him to tell us yet, mostly because well... he is six again." Crops pulls a face as well, yeah. Horror agrees. A PTSD filled six year old is not easy. But they are managing.
Horror nods "so... What Cross nad Dust think what happened is that... The magic and negativity of the apples bond itself to Nightmare. Which game him the magic and powers he would use. The connection to the balance because the apples were part of the balance. and more importantly, an adult form and mind to fit all the magic. There was just no way all that magic and energy would have fit a babybones. Especially one that hadn't shown much magic beforehand." an assumption on their end as Nightmare was never said to use magic in the book.
"We think... We think that this magic of the apples just. ran out. We had been in battle at the time and Nightmare had been hit but it shouldn't have had that much of an effect. it was the same type of attack he had been hit by before. Dust thinks it was just the last bit of magic that the apples had having run out. Meaning that with the magic and energy so went the form." all a theory of course. But it is the only thing they have.
Crop nods as he clearly thinks "And as he was suddenly an adult. instead of just being afraid and scared. all that pain and emotions took a more violent turn. As he was an adult and was suddenly able to realise that it was unfair which made him angry..." Crop pauses.
Crop glares back at the table and shakes his skull "It is... It is a whole story about victim blaming. A victim is blamed for the abuse they suffered. They are made to believe they deserve it and should be abused. Then as soon as they fight back and defend themselves they are seen as guilty." Crop takes adeep breath as he leans back "What I don't get... Why come here? I can't help with any of this."
Horror shakes his skull "This isn't about any of the big stuff. We don't even care about it. We just... Nightmare is himself again. His real self." he taps the page lightly "Not his aged-up self that the corruption enabled him to be."
Crop stares before his face changes to shock "You are trying to hide him." Then a frown "Why not go to your own home? Has it been compromised?"
Horror snorts "At this point? probably." a confused look and Horror continues "Nightmare used his magic to shield off an universe and make a castle." he shrugs at the glance "Nightmare likes to read. I imagine he liked to read back then too. He may have been an adult technically but he was still a child at soul. Child him wanted a home and wanted that to be a castle and adult him made it happen... probably... that is Killer's theory at the moment."
Crop laughs and nods "Suonds reasonable- oh... and with his magic disappearing."
Horror sighs "When I left his universe the castle had already been decaying..."
Crop frowns "Left? The five of you you mean?"
Horror looks to the side and feels the shame return "We.... we did not react well... when we saw the changes at first... we... we obviously dind't know what was going on and well." he looks down "We abandoned him. I know it was wrong and stupid and we all regret it. We came back but we still did it." shame.
shame shame shame shame shame shame shame-
A hand on his shoulder. Horror glances up and Crop smiles at him "It is okay. You are trying to fix it now right? obviously. Not cool that you abandoned a child... but it can be nerve wrecking. Suddenly going from a position where a person is mostly guiding you, to going to a position where you suddenly are responsible over that same person."
Horror looks to the side "We still left." he can't believe they just left!
Crop nods "But you returned." he grins "And you are trying to fix it."
Horror nods again "We are..." he chuckles "Not that we have been doing a good job at it. Jumping from place to place."
Crop hums "So you are looking to settle, at least for a little bit, while also hidding. Why this universe?"
Horror nods "Yeah..." He looks to the side "We... we don't know how everyone will react. To him being like this. Maybe they will react well. Maybe not. We don't want to risk it. Risk him."
Crop stares at him for a long time and nods "There must be better places?"
Horror shakes his skull "The Stars kept finding us. Dust figured out we needed a big universe that leans towards positive. Yours is one of those. It is one of the wider and bigger ones. And overall leaning towards positive."
Crop frowns "It can't be the best one..."
Horror shrugs but continues "True... there are bigger and more positive ones. But those are busy. Many people. many places. Yours is quieter. more empty. Gives peace and room to work from."
Crop frowns as he taps his chin. He thinks deeply before sighing "You guys got any type of backstory we can use? The multiverse thing isn't a known thing here and the only reason my brother and I know is because you crash landed here."
Horror blinks "You will let us stay?"
Crop nods "Sure." and he grins "Can't kick out four parents with a babybones." and he gets up.
Horrro shakes his skull "That isn't... Well I mean technically." He knows that Killer has come close to killing quite a few people with how protective he has grown over Nightmare and that isn't even including the motherhenning of Cross nor the clinginess that Dust has.
Crop chuckles as he nods towards the stairs "The attic is messy and should be cleaned but can be used by you four, well five. There is an old bed and an old lounge chair up there." more thoughtful "How big is he exactly? we will need some clothes. Probably also get a healer to check him if he is developing okay after all those magical shenanigans."
Horror stares for a moment before smiling "Thank you... I know it is a lot."
Crop shrugs as he opens the linnen closet "Horror. Taking care of milking all the cows on your own is a lot. Having to fix your roof in the middle of a thunderstorm is a lot." He straightens his spine with blankets in his arms "Helping a friend and his friends who have somehow aqcuired a babybones, while strange, does not compare to either of those. Now get your friends out of those woods. They will make the animals nervous." he grins "I am excited to be one of the first ones to meet the real Nightmare."
Horror smiles as he packs his book and goes towards the door. "Thanks again Crop."
Crop waves it off as he moves the piles upstairs.
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Boom! and they are staying in FarmTale for now! Horror and Crop are homies and Dust is more of an acquaintance of Crop but it works. Aged-up Nightmare knew that Horror had an universe he liked to visit but never demanded details. *shrugs* Nightmare didn't see the point. as long as horror wasn't going to betray him what did it matter he didn't tell him?
Surprise Nightmare, this is your temporary home now. For a bit. or maybe longer? They are still figuring it out.
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#RealAgeAU#UTMV#fanfiction#drabble#nightmare sans#Deaged Nightmare Sans#Horror Sans#Dust Sans#Killer Sans#Cross Sans#Farm Sans#Look most of them aren't in it for long but they had to be included okay?! They are mentioned! It counts!#We are back with me writing stuff to indulge myself again#hihi i am having fun#The guys are all very attached to their immortal toddler.#does six year old equal a toddler?#okay one google search later and turns out it doesn't.#doesn't matter immortal toddler sounds funnier#What else.#Yeah right Horror 100% once crash landed in FarmTale and had to wait for his teleport crystal to recharge before he could leave#He made friends.#and once Dust got dragged along for the ride because the idiot got too hurt to teleport them and Horror's crystal didn't have enough charge#so they made a stop there#Dust was very confused to wake up in a random farmhouse#This is also why Dust hasn't just teleported away with Nightmare#because technically this isn't a strange universe and he kinda knows these people#so relatively okay#Killer and Cross however are not yet chill about this#But yeah they are rooming with Crop for a bit :D#Okay rambling over time to fix my links
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when thinking about foundations as a song being about DRAAG and the concrete age the chorus reads so dramatically different. it makes me think about the expendability of soldiers + the expandability of a country itself when under a dictators rule
#im gonna explode#it just sounds so uninvolved and apathetic. you died? who cares there’s thousands of you#and thousands of us#and there will be thousands more#you don’t even get the dignity of a burial. there’s too many people to bury.#you get cremated & your ashes scattered somewhere impermanent because it doesn’t really matter what they do with you now#ty martin for inspiring this post with your tags
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imaginary friend
#if no one has me I know fictional character elita-1 has me 💯💯#Hey! You! Go listen to imaginary friend (english ver.) by itzy! You will cry! It's beautiful!!#she's not real but she's still my friend#no matter how insane it sounds#that I call a fictional imaginary character a friend#I still think of her as one 🫶🏽🫶🏽 my comfort pookie has literally been there through thick and thing#oh man the song that inspired this post#“when there's monsters on your ceiling I'll keep you safe and I will keep you dreaming” are you telling me Elita wouldn't do that#This was gonna be a drawing with moi but lowkey that's too hard to draw 🤬🤬 and lowkey would doxx me 💯💯💯#g1 elita 1#elita#elita one#transformers#elita 1#tf one elita#Elita-1#Elita-One#tfe elita one#earthspark elita one#Uhmmm! She has too many tags! Choose one fucking name hasbro!#Ariel#Tf ariel#transformers ariel
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.
#unrelated to my last post#also this is gonna be an unpopular opinion#but i’ve honestly made my peace with how taylor approaches her public politics#(i’ve said this before too)#i may sound like a cupcake right now#but i don’t have the energy to bang my head against a wall when i know no matter what i do the wall won’t break#and that’s just the harsh truth#i have trust that she is a good person and her actions show that and it is enough for me#she’s not interested in being a political figure or representative and just wants to encourage people to vote#and will speak up during elections or during pride month etc#and ofc you can make the argument that she’s so influential so she should be and i agree but also! it’s her choice!#she is political in her private her life and she doesn’t owe her politics publicly#people should focus more on actual politicians and presidents and world leaders whose actual job it is#arshia talks
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