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georgiapeach30513 · 2 years ago

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Got A Secret, Part 2

Summary: It was all up to you to help sell a lie

Pairings: Dayton White X Reader

Rating: mild

Warnings: language, gaslighting, manipulation, 18+ ONLY

Word Count: 2.3K

Series Masterlist

*dividers created by @firefly-graphics

You walk into Dayton’s home living room, and MacRay holds out his hand to. You raise up your eyebrow, and watch him wiggle his fingers around, palm facing up, “What?”

“Hand me your phone.”

“Why?”

He rolls his eyes as he looks you up and down, “You know the drill. You’ve seen it a few times. We went through your public social medias, but I need to know what’s on your phone.”

“Dayton!” He grimaces, but mouths out a please, and you hand it over to Doug, and sit in front of your ‘boyfriend’. “So what other humiliating thing am I going to have to do?”

“We need a timeline. It’s easy to put the two of you together, because you’re always there, but we need a narrative of when this started. Especially to get rid of our other issue,” Ray sits down beside Dayton. His gaze goes in between the two of you, while he waits on either of you to come up with a timeline.

You didn’t care. It didn’t matter. It was all fake anyways, and you’d leave it up to the professionals. Since they didn’t give you much of a choice, you weren’t going to help them. It was absurd.

“You’re on dating apps?” MacRay lifts up from your phone. “Seriously? And there's unopened messages. Great. Now we’ve got to pay these people off.”

“First off, I didn’t ask to be linked with Dayton. I am doing him and you guys a favor. He is your money. You can’t sell him, you lose money. Secondly, I joined a dating app because I’m always going from coast to coast for Dayton. I don’t have time to date the traditional way. So you can back off. This is Dayton’s mess that I am obliging your stupid fantasy world to get him out of it, and I won’t be apologizing for being a woman and wanting a companionship. Pay them off. You ruined my chance of dating anyone ever again anyways.”

You were bitter, but more importantly you were sick and tired being made to be the bad guy in this situation. Dayton was the one who screwed up, and you were doing all of them a favor, and they still had the audacity to like you were public enemy number one.

“Shooting star,” Ray looks over at Dayton, and then back at you. “We’re going to rebrand you as Dayton’s shooting star. Try to keep you as private as possible. And soon this will all be but a memory.”

“And then he goes and fucks another young girl. Then what? Maybe the real problem is Dayton’s inability to grow up and nurture real relationships.”

“Maybe you need to quit talking like I’m not here.”

“I didn’t ask for this life. I didn’t want to be in the spotlight. So yeah, I’m pissed off right now, and you’re going to get what I give you. Be ready for constant sarcasm and anger, because that’s how I feel, and that’s how I’m dealing with this. I met a nice guy. He called me a bitch because I lied to him about my famous boyfriend. You know, a little bit of a warning would have been nice.”

Doug hands your phone back, adn you don’t even want to look at what he could have removed. You had watched in live time as your social medias were being modified right before your eyes. Now everything you posted had to be pre-approved. Your family was untagged from posts, so they weren’t part of this nonsense. Things had only gotten started and you were exhausted.

“Little Miss pop tart is putting a bit of a hitch in our timeline. Dayton, you’re gonna have to take a hit,” Ray looks over at his client shrugging. “She’s got time stamped texts. You and Star over here had been talking, but it wasn’t serious. But when you were ready, you dropped it all. I’ll make sure that a source sends a tip into the gossip columns, and blogs.”

Well at least he wasn’t coming out unscathed. And here you thought that Dayton was going to be the good guy in the scenario. He looked sad, and you couldn’t quite put your finger on why. He was saving his image, while you carried on a lie for who knew how long.

“How long is this supposed to last?”

“I’m thinking at least a year,” you sink back into the couch. A year. A whole year of playing a part. It was annoying that you were the one putting your life on hold, and you didn’t even know why. “I see you have questions, but Dayton has been selling the whole I want to settle down, wants to get married, and want to have kids for a while. He had people talking about the fact that he was pandering to his audience. This gives them a steady relationship to talk about.”

“It’s a lie. And a year?”

“I figured that’s all you would agree to. Two to three years would be ideal. After the first seven months you’ll move in here. There’s plenty of room that you can sleep somewhere else, but we’ve got to sell this,” unbelievable. They were really trying to con you into covering up Dayton’s indiscretions.

“His fans and social media are actually responding well to this. There’s a few naysayers, and we’re hoping with the public outing it’ll put this to rest,” Dayton was eerily quiet. Just sitting there like a kicked dog with his tail in between his legs. “But the overall reception had been positive,” you hated them all right now. But Doug was particularly getting on your nerves. It was always going to be about the image.

“So we’re going to do this downtown. You’re going to have a nice lunch. Go walking around, and even go to the grocery store. Give the people the idea that you’re normal. Mundane things sell. Because you’re just like them. I don’t care what you talk about, just look happy. Look like you want to be together. We’re going to have Mickey outside the restaurant, and he’ll follow you to the market, and he’ll wait on you outside. I’m thinking you need to get some wine or beer. A few snacks, make it look like you’re coming back here for a nice evening at home. A few weeks from now, we’ll station some moving vans outside, and that will be all for awhile.”

You lean back staring at the ceiling, “I hate all of you.”

“You were the best option, and you have garnered favor with the fans. It’ll be a big step for Dayton’s career and yours.”

“And Dayton says nothing,” you sit up and stare only at him, “You played me. You could have had the decency to call me, text me, anything. But no, you waited until I couldn’t say no. You knew I wouldn’t. You knew I would do what it takes to protect you and your precious image. But after this…I can’t do this. I can’t work for someone that won’t give me the courtesy of asking me if this is okay.”

“Great,” Doug claps his hands, standing up, “I got your stylists ready to coordinate your outfits. And you can drive to the restaurant.”

“Do regret it?” You ask Dayton. You lean your head over to look at him. He looked too focused on driving, and the car was stifling. There was too much tension, and it drove you nuts. You hope he was able to act his ass off, because you still wanted to strangle him.

“Which part?”

“The stupid girl that you were fucking?” He quickly looks at you, and gives you a quick glare, before looking back at the road. “The part that involved me?”

“If there was another way, don’t you think I’d take it?”

“Uh-uh. What we’re not going to do is play your son story with me. You got yourself into this mess, and like always, you’re letting someone else clean it up. Do you regret getting me involved?”

Taking a deep breath, he pulls into the parking spot, and smiles over at you, “Since I have to be in this shitty situation, I’m glad it’s with you.”

“That’s not a fucking answer.”

“Media training, Shooting Star. You’ll be getting it, too. I’m sure there will be interviews. You gotta learn to shit the narrative to be what you want it to be. I’m thankful for you, and I’m glad that I have to have a fake relationship and live in girlfriend with you. I am not implicating myself in this trivial game of questions that isn’t going to change anything. It is what it is.”

“Normal people don’t do this,” he gets out of the car, and jogs over to your side. Opening up your door as he lets you out.

“I’m not a normal person. The photographer is going to be towards your left, under that boutique awning. So when we come out of the restaurant, he’ll get what he needs, but he is following us. We also have cell phones to worry about. Everyone has the ability to catch us on video or camera. We want photos. Videos show everything. Just go with it. Pretend you actually like me.”

It was hard to do that considering you hated him at the moment.

“I don’t like this.”

“Don’t open your mouth too much,” Dayton tells you, sliding his arm around your waist. His hand settles on your hip, and you turn your head to look up at him, “Smile,” you give him your best nervous smile, and he leans down to kiss you. Just a short quick peck, but there was a part of you that enjoyed it too much. The way his lips were so soft, and the way his matcha lingered in them, “Smile. People read lips. Keep it simple.”

“Okay,” you whisper, and his hands slides on your back, and into your hand. Annoyingly you found his fingers weaving in yours romantic. This is how you wanted to go out for a walk with a boyfriend. Not a fake one either.

He leads you into the grocery store, and you sigh in relief. “Don’t drop your guard. Cameras everywhere. The only place we’re safe is at home,” his home. Being forced to be your home shortly. It wasn’t fair. “You’re doing great, sweetheart.”

“And look at this,” Doug throws down a few gossip magazines that you push across the coffee table away from you. You didn’t care. Pulling the throw up closer around your neck, you lay down on the couch, and enjoy some warmth. “You’re the talk of the town. Got a few wanting exclusive interviews, and eventually we’re going to have to make this public relationship official. How would you like to do it? Joint instagram posts or an interview or…?”

“Wouldn’t it make more sense to wait until the moving vans gets here. Give people something to speculate again?” You hated yourself. Why would you offer this as a solution? It did make perfect sense, but you didn’t want to help them out anymore than you already were. “People enjoy the drama. They enjoy figuring things out. Leave a few cryptic messages, and they want to decipher them. Want to know if they’re close to the real answer.”

“I like the way you’re thinking. Play this game of what is going on a bit longer. Is this real? Is it a fling? Is it marriage?”

“It’s not,” you deadpan. Marriage would not happen out of this deal it was out of the question.

“Where’s Dayton?”

“He’s on a run. He needed time to clear his mind. I stayed home. I don’t want to be more public than I have to be. Now we’re in a bubble and a bigger radar, because people want to know the truth. I’m sure your photographer has gotten paid, and has done well for these exclusives, and I just want to take a nap, and be left alone to deal with my thoughts about my fake relationship with my fake boyfriend.”

“You know,” He begins. His voice was slimy and you hated the way it made you cringe. As if this situation wasn’t bad enough, you felt icky with him. “You don’t have to make this completely a transactional relationship. You were on a dating website. I’m sure in a year it’ll get lonely. Have some fun. From my understanding Dayton is a good lay.”

“Leave!”

“I’m just saying. Things could turn real.”

“I don’t date actors,” you roll over on the couch, putting your back to him, and sigh. “You never can trust them.”

While it would be easy to have something physical with Dayton, in the long run you knew it would make things more difficult. You were stuck with him for at least a year. Stuck in this house, and stuck on set with him. Being around him was unavoidable now. Add in a physical relationship, and it would get weird. Possibly make you closer in ways, but at the same time, it would make things too real. This wasn’t. This was fake, and it was something you were selling to the public, and unfortunately also to your family that didn’t understand the game.

Things may only had just become, but you were about to be with Dayton non-stop. Work with him, and come home to him. Even on set, you would be going back to his room. Everything relied on this little lie that was beginning to get bigger. But there was no way you would trust Dayton with your emotions. That kiss felt too real, and his hand felt too good on your skin. You couldn’t get caught up in his fake feelings. You wouldn’t.

Masterlist

Taglist: @tis-thedamn-season @marveloustaylortot @pono-pura-vida @sstan-hoe @infatuatedjanes @missusbarnes-rogers @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @peaches1958 @thedarkplume @rebekahdawkins @seitmai @smile1318 @andydrysdalerogers

#got a secret #actor!dayton white #dayton white #dayton white x reader #dayton white x fem!reader #dayton white x y/n #dayton white x you

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lotties-ashwagandha · 2 years ago

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NEVER HAVE I BEEN A BLUE, CALM SEA (final part)

pairing: alice macray x reader

word count: 1449

notes and warnings: watch me get overly sad that this is the last chapter. also if u havent listened to storms by fleetwood mac yet then maybe listen to it bc i snuck a little lyric reference as the final line ykyk

summary: from the moment you saw her, you swore to give her everything... or at least a Woody Guthrie album.

taglist: @thedeconstructionist @paulsonsratched @goodeday2u @cordeliass @cartoonpeoples @mayfair-fleur @traumatisedfangirl

You slammed the wedding invitation down on the coffee table. Your mind had gone completely blank upon reading it, your heart beginning to race.

The invitation was from Alice’s son — he was getting married in a week, a grand wedding in a giant church across town.

You sighed. You hadn’t seen Alice in four weeks, and every day you’d spent apart had been a living hell. Her absence manifested itself in gentle reminders everywhere. The morning sunrise reminded you of her serenity, the smell of fresh coffee reminded you of the mornings you had spent in the motel at the women’s conference. She was in everything.

It was a strange sort of grief to know that to the rest of the world, she was still present — you were the only one that had lost her, and even so, she was not really lost, just on the other side of town. But a fifteen minute drive seemed like thousands of years, a journey never accomplishable and forever unrewarding.

Without her, everything seemed pointless. You spent every moment reliving the weeks you had spent together, for maybe if you longed for those days, they would take you back, accept you into the past like those lost to ancient worlds.

You leaned back against the sofa you occupied. You were tired. There was no elaborate, beautiful way to put it, for no part of it was beautiful. You were tired – it was just that simple.

Part of you wished dearly to attend the wedding. You adored Alice’s children, and they were quite fond of you as well, for on a few occasions Alice had allowed you to meet them. Alice would be at the wedding, of course, and you would be able to see her, if only from afar.

Deep in your gut, there was also a part of you that never wanted to leave your apartment ever again.

You were deeply furious with Alice. Her sudden disappearance from your life had caused so much pain, so much anguish, after a time where everything had seemed absolutely perfect. Yet at the same time, you were endlessly willing to forgive her, time and time again until the two of you found the happiness that was waiting for you.

You had to go to the wedding. You couldn’t help yourself. For better or worse, you had to see her again, even if it only made things worse.

–

The church was bustling. Guests hurried around, small talk and cigarette smoke making the space seem so much smaller than it was. White decor was everywhere, and long tables covered in white tablecloths held a seemingly endless buffet for after the service.

You anxiously lit a cigarette, attempting to look as preoccupied as you could. You were the only person in the room not engaged in conversation, and the heavy awkwardness rising in your chest grew more intense with every moment.

Examining the room, you noticed that many of the guests you had already met – they were the ones in Alice’s wine group that had experienced you calling Phyllis Schlafly a pompous bitch.

Across the room was Phyllis Schlafly herself. You wanted nothing more than to run straight at her and beat her ass, knock her unconscious and taunt her, but you held off for fear of ruining the wedding… but had it been the wedding of anyone else, you gladly would have taken the chance to begin a brawl.

Standing next to Phyllis was Alice. She was wearing a coral and blue floral dress, her eyes shining in the sun streaming in through the windows of the church.

You only had the chance of watching her for a moment – everyone was beginning to gather into their seats, the wedding service beginning to take place.

Waiting through the service felt like hell. You were antsy, horribly nauseous, feeling that if you were any more nervous you would up and vomit all over the floor. Such imagery only made you more anxious of becoming more anxious, which you knew would not fare well in the long run.

You glanced at where Alice was sitting in the front row of seats. Buck’s arm was around her, and she was leaning into his shoulder. The two of them seemed so content in one another’s presence.

You needed air.

You needed an escape.

As quietly as you could, you stood and made a quick escape from the service. Your surroundings had begun to sway and swerve.

You ducked into the first open room you could find – it was a children’s bible study classroom, but you hardly noticed that at first, too overcome by nerves. It was a mistake to have come to the wedding, you knew that new, irreversibly and all too painfully. Desperately you wished to escape, but you felt like you could hardly move.

The door shut abruptly.

You glanced at the doorway and almost cried.

Alice stood before you in all her glory, a look of resignation upon her features, though you could see the heavy concern she was hiding.

For a moment, the two of you were silent.

“I shouldn’t have come,” you started, meeting her eyes. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have ruined this day for you, I don’t know what I was thinking.”

It took her a moment to respond, for her to find the words. “You haven’t ruined anything.”

“You and Buck, are you…”

“No,” she answered. “It’s all for show.”

You took a deep breath, a bit relieved.

“Are you okay?”

“Yes,” you lied. The air between you had grown tense, and neither of you were willing to speak your thoughts directly.

Yet to your great surprise, when the silence finally broke, it was Alice who broke the silence.

“I tried so hard to suppress it all,” she started. “Everything I felt for you felt so right, but everything around me told me that I was wrong. I couldn’t escape. In the end, I had to choose between my life as it is, or you.”

“And you chose your family. I understand,” you whispered.

“No. I chose Buck, and I chose Phyllis… and I chose wrong.”

You paused for a moment, disbelief overcoming you. “But your children-”

“I will never lose my children, I will make sure of that,” Alice interrupted, and you did not doubt her in the slightest. She started towards you, and soon her hands were on your waist and you could hear her breath. “I’m sorry.”

Her words were so raw – so real and vulnerable.

“Why are you telling me this now? You’ve had weeks. We haven’t spoken in ages.” You accused.

“Every morning without you I have felt so empty. Where your love once blossomed in the mind, there has been only a vacancy that I have found no escape from. As soon as I saw you here today… I knew I could never leave you again.”

You closed the distance between the two of you, connecting your lips with hers. All at once, the darkness inside of you faded away, replaced with the same light that had been shimmering in her eyes, a promise of love and hope and everything you never thought you could ever possess. You could taste the salt of her tears, the promise of eternity in the death of the present.

Perhaps you were damned from the start – perhaps you were created for the life that called you. It did not matter anymore, for in your arms was the love of your life.

“I’m so sorry,” Alice whispered again once you had pulled away, and you could hear the strain in her voice.

“No, don’t, I understand – I love you so much.”

Her only response was connecting your lips once again.

A grand future rolled out before you, guided by the dazzling sunlight and the waves of the sea that bore you. Nothing could stand in your way, not with this love sent from heaven burning so deeply between you.

You looked to your future, and every time, you saw Alice.

Complications awaited – Buck, Phyllis, politics – but all of it was so far away, nothing that you could not overcome in each other’s arms.

Once, you had thought that she embodied the wisdom of the sea. Her wisdom had been found through chaos, and through it she had acquired a calm greater than you would ever know. Only later had you learned that the peace burning within her was truly chaos, wishing to escape, wishing to be set free.

She could burn the world to the ground, and with you at her side, her greatest love, she intended to.

For never had she been a blue, calm sea… she had always been a storm.

#alice macray #alice macray x reader #mrs america #sarah paulson x reader #sarah paulson #wlw #vintage wlw

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safic4-m · 2 years ago

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🏳️‍🌈Characters in Pride month🌈

~Master list~

One-shot

Wattpad

So…I’m not really sure what this is about but that’s what came out, okay. That’s how I perceive the characters and if you don’t have the same point of view as me, I invite you to fuck your mother…, haha not true, but if you don’t like it please don’t leave hateful comments.

P.S. Orders are open for anyone who wants them.

-Lana winters

June is a very important month for Lana, for a long time she had conflicts with her sexuality, then her whole family stopped talking to her, but when she met you, she realized that she didn’t really need any of them, you were her family and that made Lana more than happy to have you in her life. Obviously there was a change in her show, the set being adorned with some flags.

-Cordelia Goode

The academy dresses in the colours of the flag as soon as June starts, besides being one of the most LGBT+ places in New Orleans (I mean we are talking about a witch academy so obviously it must be gay), the supreme one takes time out of her busy schedule to be able to experience this month with you and her girls.

-Sally McKenna

This time puts Sally in a somewhat melancholic mood, mostly because of all the people who for years had to repress these feelings because of society and the fear of being judged for loving someone; but it’s not all sadness and pain, as this helps her to have inspiration to create songs, not to mention that the blonde always writes one about how amazing it was for her to have met you.

-Audrey Tindall

The Brit loves this, saying that every month should be like this and not just one a year. The world goes crazy when you two show up at the march wearing shirts that say things like, “Homosexuality is not a disease, but homophobia is” and “I didn’t ask for your opinion on whether loving a woman is OK”. As well as going out to parties and gay bars where everyone wants to take pictures with your girlfriend.

-Ally Mayfair-Richards

This woman transpires homosexuality…, rather it is the definition of homosexuality, Ally is one of the most excited people when the month is approaching and with the position she has, she manages to make the whole city full of flags. But it’s not all rosy, as that’s when she gets into the most trouble Oz, usually over arguing with her peers about Pride month or if someone makes a comment about one of her mothers.

-Wilhemina Venable

Wilhemina is known for being a very reserved woman, so she’s not the person who celebrates Pride month the most, but that’s what you’re there for, your energy is more than enough for this month. Something not many people know is that the stoic Ms. Venable is a staunch protector of trans kids.

-TB Karen

For Karen it’s just another month, she doesn’t see any difference, yes the streets are full of colour and her paintings tend to be gayer, but for her it’s just another month. Although she doesn’t just say she enjoys this month a lot, she loves to see how the world turns from being so grey and gloomy and becomes colourful, but what she likes the most is the fact that you become so alive.

-Alma Peregrine

This woman has a house full of children, so it’s very important to her that her children grow up without prejudice and you hang out with their headmistress, so they are familiar with this. The ymbryne loop is September 3rd 1940 and by this time, it was not a very visible thing to celebrate this month, but even though they live in this year they have a vague knowledge of how it has taken on visibility over the years.

-Alice Macray

GOD…this woman is the cutest thing ever, for her this is the most colourful month, she thinks it’s cute how people come together and go out and march. She may still be a little shy about coming out and expressing to the world that she loves a woman, but it’s nice how she lives this month proudly wearing a rainbow pin on her clothes.

-Diane Sherman

The redhead likes the idea of staying at home with you and watching movies more for the month, but if you asked her to go out with you she would never refuse. This month she’s prone to having the house blaring “Born this way”, which has gotten annoying, as she wakes up to the music blaring, but loves to see you so happy as she puts on a show of dancing to the choreography

#lana winters #cordelia goode #sally mckenna #audrey tindall #ally mayfair richards #wilhemina venable #tb karen #american horror story #alma peregrine #alma lefay peregrine #mphfpc #alice macray #mrs america #diane sherman #run #lgbt pride

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dreamypqulson · 3 years ago

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-> masterlist

cordelia goode

you all over me

haunted

the one

you’re my cure

sweater weather

drunken confessions

pull me out of the train wreck

and finally it seems, my lonely days are through pt.1 | pt.2

to love and to be loved

the wedding will come and go, but our love will forever grow

my pain fits in the palm of your freezing hand

you drew stars around my scars

there you go, saving me from the cold

too young to feel this hurt

gentle hearts, crueler mind

war is over

young and beautiful

two queens in a king sized bed

so let me hold you, and tell you how pretty you are

and you’ll be my valentine

small steps but i’m still moving

i know we got some potential, cause that look you gave me was so gentle

my only sunshine

my love, mine all mine

everything is icy and blue, and you would be there too

————————————————————————

ally mayfair-richards

so this is love

love you endlessly

underneath the christmas tree

she could never kill a fly (but she could kill her wife)

sick day

all wrapped up in mistletoe

meet me in the afterglow

soon they’ll be happiness, for now we’ll fight

————————————————————————

lana winters

fallin’ for ya

and it all comes down to you

‘tis the season part 1 | part 2

wildest dreams

horror movie scares

————————————————————————

sally mckenna

one step forward, three steps back

————————————————————————

billie dean howard

always forever

this christmas, i gave you my heart

my light in the dark

you don’t have to hide from me

haunting of soullessness cellar

love you to the moon and to saturn

————————————————————————

audrey tindall

lights, camera, action

love grows where my tindall grows

————————————————————————

diane sherman

get better

delilah

raining on lovers street

for the hope of it all

i’ll always keep you safe, my love

————————————————————————

harriet hayes

chasing stars

rewrite the stars chapter 1 | chapter 2 | chapter 3 |chapter 4 | chapter 5

burnt out

i’ll be home for christmas

hold me tight and make me feel okay

counting stars

half moon eyes, difficult despise

————————————————————————

mildred ratched

there’s no crowd when it’s just us

till dawn i’ll hold you

her name painted in the sky

everything works out in the end

————————————————————————

abby gerhard

now i’m covered in you

to the moon and back

————————————————————————

alice macray

and there was only one bed

our little secret part 1 | part 2

————————————————————————

elisa cronkite

spaghetti kiss

————————————————————————

merrill (swimmers)

say yes to me

————————————————————————

cordelia goode x misty day

the only heaven i’ll be sent to, is when i’m alone with you

called me up again just to break me like a promise

one plus two equals us pt.1 | pt.2 | pt.3 | pt.4 | pt.5 | pt.6

gentle hearts, mothers love

our caves collapsing

we’re not so different

hold me without hurting me

i want to be with you everywhere

sometimes it’ll hurt part 1 | part 2

black cat’s magic

this is me trying

soon you’ll get better

baby’s got trouble

————————————————————————

doris gardner

better days

hold me into the new dawn

————————————————————————

ahs coven witches

sleepover shenanigans

————————————————————————

audrey tindall x shelby miller

when the world caves in

————————————————————————

I’m always open for requests so feel free to send some! :)

request to be on my taglist as well!!!

#cordelia goode #ahs apocalypse #ahs coven #ahs fanfiction #american horror story #ally mayfair richards #sarah paulson #billie dean howard #sally mckenna #tb karen #mildred ratched #ratched

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cabensonsgirly · 3 years ago

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👼I pray for forgiveness that you can’t grant me. You are a woman of God yet you feel like a temptation from Lucifer. (Alice Macray) [NSFW]👼

Dark!Alice Macray x fem!reader

👼Wordcount: 1896👼

👼Content: Heavy religion, one-hundred percent blasphemous, definitely not sweet Alice Macray, riding crop, homophobia, internalised homophobia👼

👼“Yes, Miss Macray. Dear Heavenly Father, forgive me for my impatience and selfishness. Defeat the bad attitude of competitiveness that I often display in arguments and disagreements with others in my family, and- and” The wardrobe door closing firmly startles you, “Start again. This time no hesitation. No stuttering,” Alice says coldly.👼

“We’re going to church today, Yn,” Alice says while running her brush through her hair, looking at you through the reflection in the mirror. You let out a sigh, going over to the wardrobe to get out the church clothes Alice purchased for you, “It’s not even Sunday, lo- Alice. It’s the middle of the week, and we’ve already been on Monday and Tuesday, why’re we going today?”

She puts her brush down a little firmer than intended, “Because we have to pray for forgiveness, that’s why. We are living a life of sin, and the only way we can continue is if we pray for forgiveness each day.” You get out your white dress with tasteful lace detailing, starting to remove your usual clothing, “That doesn’t make any sense. It’s not like God has actually said it’s bad for woman to lie with woman. He has said that we shouldn’t wear clothing of mix-“

Alice cuts you off, “Do not preach The Bible to me, Yn. You have only just started repenting for your sin of lying with women, you hardly know The Bible, let alone what God does and does not approve of.” She sprays a little perfume on her neck and wrists, something plain as anything more would mean that she was prideful, and that was a sin.

She gets up and goes over to you, pulling the zipper up on your dress, “I don’t know why you’re complaining, Yn… You always love what happens when we get back from church.” Your cheeks flush, and you go to turn around to face her, but she holds you still, pressing wet kisses to the side of your neck, “Don’t you enjoy it when my head is between your legs? Only getting pleasure when you get the bible verses correct? What a good way to learn about what isn’t a sin.”

You let out a quiet moan upon feeling her lips on your neck, shame and arousal merging together to make an uncomfortable knot in your stomach. “Isn’t- Isn’t that blasphemous to do that, Alice?” She nips lightly just under your jaw, “Blasphemy is a lesser crime than lesbianism, Yn. God will forgive us because we are learning his word, we earn his forgiveness when we go to church and pray, when we confess.”

You manage to finally turn in her arms, leaning in to kiss her but she moves away, a look of disgust on her face, “What are you doing? Don’t be so disgusting, Yn. Get your church shoes on, and I will meet you in the car.” You open your mouth to speak but when Alice points to the cross hanging above the bed, you bite back your protest, nodding your head, “Yes, Alice.”

Later that evening while Alice is putting her children to bed, you decide to try and sneak in some self-indulgent time. You’re lying in bed under the covers, you close your eyes as you picture the love of your life, how beautiful she looked when in prayer, the way her lips moved as she spoke each word. Your hand kneads one of your breasts underneath your plain cotton slip, your lips parting in quiet moans, although you were pleasuring yourself, you hoped that God could not hear your sin, the sounds of you committing such impurity and defiling yourself and the bed of your partner under the holy cross. Your other hand runs down your body to between your legs, a breathy gasp escaping you before you could swallow it when you feel how wet you are, just further evidence of your unholy act.

“Alice” you breathe out as you dip two fingers into your heat. Alice opens the door carefully as to not make any noise, she thought it was odd for you to close the door seeing as she liked it open in case one of her boys needed her. So, when she saw it was shut, she knew you were doing something you weren’t supposed to. She had naively hoped that you would have stopped giving in to such an insatiable beast.

She closed the door quietly behind her, leaning against it, she couldn’t believe her eyes. She felt her heartbeat racing upon hearing you say her name so sinfully. Only when she saw you dip into your dripping heat did she speak, “Yn!” she said sternly, her voice hard.

You quickly pulled out, moving to sit up on the edge of the bed. Alice watched you, her eyes falling to your chest when she sees how your breasts bounce slightly because of your sudden movement. You look up at Alice before down at the carpet between your feet, “Forgive me, for I have sinned, Miss Macray,” you say quietly, your cheeks darkening further, but with shame instead of arousal.

“Why did you touch yourself, Yn? Don’t you know that it’s a sin to do that? Especially when you’re thinking of me, another woman.” She lets out a disappointed sigh, going over to the bedside table to get out one of her Bibles, “Over the edge of the bed, Yn. You will read the prayer that I have written and put in the front of the book until I believe that you have truly earned forgiveness.”

Alice places the book in front of you once you have bent over the bed, opening it to the page before going over to the wardrobe, “Read it now so I know you understand what I’ve written.” You gulp and look at the page, guilt starting to creep into you, increasing by the minute. How selfish and unholy could you be to have committed such an act?

“Yes, Miss Macray. Dear Heavenly Father, forgive me for my impatience and selfishness. Defeat the bad attitude of competitiveness that I often display in arguments and disagreements with others in my family, and- and” The wardrobe door closing firmly startles you, “Start again. This time no hesitation. No stuttering,” Alice says coldly.

“My apologies, Miss Macray. Dear Heavenly Father, forgive me for my impatience and selfishness. Defeat the bad attitude of competitiveness that I often display in arguments and disagreements with others in my family, and for giving in to unholy temptation of laying with another woman. Energize me with your Spirit so that I don’t stray from the Holy Path. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.”

Alice returns to you, standing behind you where she runs the head of the riding crop over your skin, “Very good, Yn. You will get 10 hits for the thought of touching yourself, 10 for doing so, 10 for saying my name, and 10 for giving in to unholy temptations once more.” You nod, balling your hands into fists in the sheets in preparation for what is to come, “Yes, Miss Macray.”

The strikes began without warning, the unyielding leather coming down on your flesh like hellfire. You knew that were you to make a sound, Alice would give you something to truly scream about. With each strike it went straight to your core, desperately trying to keep your legs apart because you were already being punished for giving into the Devil’s lure, you didn’t want Alice to punish your further. She spared you no mercy in her actions. You counted each lashing in your mind in a desperate attempt to keep yourself from moaning out.

With each strike it was as if she were hoping to beat the sin from your very being, hoping that the pain would be burned into your mind and associate itself with you touching yourself and giving into the temptation of Lucifer. Your lips hit the sheets on the thirtieth lash, the plushness of the duvet granting you some reprieve in contrast to the harshness of the leather. Your hands which you had placed above your head curled into tighter fists, your fingernails digging deep into your palms.

“The tears you cry shows me, shows God, that the sin is being cleansed from your soul. You are devoted to The Lord now,” Alice speaks, her strikes coming down harder than before, something you didn’t even know was possible considering her physique. “Where has your devotion to him been all this time? Where did it go? This is a body that God has created so generously, and you are tainting it with nothing but sin,” She stopped for a moment, and took each cheek of your ass into separate hands. Her thumbs brutally rubbing circles into your reddened ass. “Where is your shame?”

“Oh Miss Macray” You all but moaned out, your face immediately burning with shame upon saying her name so wantonly. The memory of the pain you have just endured crashing to the forefront of your mind once more, disgusted by your behaviour. Alice saw now as the perfect opportunity to deliver the final blow, the crop cracking in the air as it hits the globe of your ass. You cried out in agony, it felt as though you were bleeding, your ass burning hot and raw from the punishment you’ve endured.

You slip off the bed, whimpering when your ass hits the carpet, the fabric irritating your already inflamed skin. You slumped against the foot of the bed, a continuous stream of tears running down your cheeks. Alice put the crop down on the bed before her gentle touch to your cheek drew your gaze to her, “Was my warning about noise not enough to deter you? Has Lucifer himself taken hold of you?” Her voice was so soft unlike her words which struck like daggers into you, “Is there no salvation for you? God give me strength to cleanse the impurity from this woman.”

You couldn’t help but lean into her touch, a pathetic mewl falling from your lips when you feel her other hand cup your heat, “Allow me release, Miss Macray, please.” She clicks her tongue as if she were scolding a child caught stealing a cookie from the jar, “You harlot” she spits at you making you flinch, not use to this hard tone. “You selfishly ask for release instead of asking The Lord for forgiveness.” Her lips were so close to yours, yet the space between felt just as big as the space separating Earth from the Heavens. You could feel each puff of her breath hitting your lips, the soft floral scent of her lipstick reaching your nose.

Alice’s lips brush against your own, you both letting out a quiet moan because of the fleeting touch, sin never being more tempting than it is now. “Miss Macray, I pray for salvation, for forgiveness that only you can grant me,” you say quietly, her proximity making your eyes flutter shut as to not lose complete control, to not give in completely to temptation. She presses her hand harder against your heat, her fingers ghosting through your folds, “There is no release for a sinner,” she says just as quiet, “you will change the sheets and wash the sin from your skin before you return to bed to pray for another chance of salvation.”

Alice gets up, moving to put the crop away before leaving the bedroom entirely. She felt a burn deep in her core, the call of Lucifer more tempting now than ever. But unlike you, she is a pious woman, and isn’t so willing to purge herself of her holiness.

#Alice Macray #Alice Macray imagine #Alice Macray x reader #Sarah Paulson #Sarah Paulson imagine #Sarah Paulson x reader

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oscar-lettjohanssonloveme · 4 years ago

Text

Little Sunshine (Miss Venable x reader x Alice Macray)

okay..hi :) this is reallyyyy long xD And its the story of this 3 cuties and how they fell in love with each other.. Well, its a little bit like the 3. part of “purple roses” (purple roses u can find here: https://littlejeaniehugsbumblebees.tumblr.com/post/640902350735818752/purple-roses-ms-venable-x-reader )

I know, that there is no second part online today, but there will be! If u didnt read the first part, u dont need to, coz i wrote this fanfiction that way, that u dont have to read the first part, i guess its angst idk

anygays my english is a mess, thats why i use google translate:’)

can we just talk about the fact, how perfect alice and mina would match? Mina the hot top with all that bdsm vibes and on the other hand we got the cute and innocent Alice sksksks

I guess Mina is the protagonist of this fanfic

A good description of your relationship would have been complicated. Because it was all incredibly complicated. Don't get me wrong, you loved your girlfriends and they loved you, but sometimes when you woke up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head against your chest, you might just be confused how all of that could be possible.

And sometimes you couldn't help but wonder what your life would be like without one of your girlfriends. But you knew that you could never live without one of them, that was a fact.

You needed both to be happy, there was no other way.

Mina brought firmness and structure into your life. Thanks to her, you had developed routines for your daily routine and were no longer so distracted. And you loved the fact about her that she was more rational than emotional about things.

And every time she went on a business trip and left Alice and you at home alone, a huge mess broke out and all structures were thrown away.

You would oversleep in the morning, be late for work and your house would turn into a huge disaster and mess.

It just wouldn't work without Mina.

Alice, on the other hand, was the most innocent, gentle, and naive person you had ever met. Mina helped you solve your problems, but Alice helped you understand and accept them. In addition, Alice was incredibly cute and she was fantastic at cooking.

And whenever you needed it, she was there to hug you and tell you how much she loved you.

And the proof that it wouldn't work without Alice was the relationship you had with Mina before Alice came into your life. At the moment when everything you had with Mina broke, it seemed like God would have sent a gentle angel to save you.

----------------------

"This is going to be a new record .." you said as you leaned into the door frame to watch your girlfriend who was still working at her desk.

"What do you mean?", She lifted her gaze from her laptop in confusion to stare at you with a frown.

"You have been home for 4 hours and are still working .."

Mina sighed and rubbed her temples.

"I just have to make one phone call and then I'm done .." she muttered with her eyes closed.

"You always say that ..." you started, shaking your head. "One last phone call, one last document, one last email ... and then it's 10 p.m."

Mina was startled at your words and took a quick look at the clock on her laptop. You were right, it was 10 p.m.

"I doesn't matter ..." you sighed and turned to go back into the hallway.

"I'm going to bed, good night Wilhemina ..."

"Good night .." she replied quietly and stared after you.

Wilhemina.

That's what you called her only when you were angry.

Mina swore quietly and grabbed her phone before dialing the directory assistance number and letting it ring.

"Uhm..Hello, you're connected to the directory assistance, I'm Alice ..", came a soft female voice, which sounded a bit too happy for Mina's taste.

"I want you to find Lennox Fischer's private email address for me ..", Mina said in a commanding tone.

There was silence on the other end of the phone for a moment before the woman, Alice, continued.

"We have actually been closed since 6 p.m. .."

"Then you shouldn't have answered the call, could you still find this address for me?" Mina sighed and propped her chin on her palm.

"Give me a minute ... I've only been working here for a few weeks ...", Alice laughed nervously and Mina closed her eyes in annoyance.

"That's when I realize I shouldn't have told you my name .." Alice remarked after a few seconds.

"How tragic .." Mina replied ironically and pinched the bridge of her nose.

"Do you have the email address?"

"I'm sorry..but what was the name again?"

"Damn it, it's not that difficult. Then why do you have this job if you can't get anything done anyway? I've rarely met someone who is as damn unqualified as you," barked Mina and slapped the table with the flat of her hand.

"You have no idea .." the other woman yelled back.

"Can you all stop being so impatient with me? I'm only human too ... And all because you're too lazy to look for it yourself and now take out your frustration on me ... I'm getting this right now not paid either, so it takes as long as it takes. And if you have a problem with it, fuck off.."

Miss Venable stared in confusion at the phone in her hand.

"Uhm, I'm sorry ..", she stammered overwhelmed.

"It's just that my girlfriend is impatiently waiting for me to finally get to bed .."

On the other end of the phone, Alice snorted.

"Yours too, yes? Get a divorce from her, even if she's just your girlfriend, it makes everything easier..You know- "

"Lennox Fischer ..", Mina interrupted the woman to bring her back to the subject.

"Oh yeah .. m'sorry .." Alice muttered and laughed nervously again. "You have to know that I got divorced from my husband two months ago and it's all a little bit complicated .."

"Aha."

"Well, I now have his email address, can you write it down? Then I'll dictate it to you .." Alice said and Mina sat down straight again to type in the email address down that Alice dictated to her on the phone.

"Good .." Alice said and sounded polite again.

"Then I thank you for your call and hope I could help you .."

Mina let out a small snort and had to grin at the strange woman.

"I have to thank you .." she muttered before hanging up and finally shutting down her laptop.

When she finally opened the door to your bedroom, you were lying with your back to her in bed and she couldn't tell whether you were still awake or already asleep. She undressed quietly and then climbed into bed behind you.

"Honey?" She whispered softly as she leaned over to gently press kisses against your exposed shoulder. "Are you still awake?"

"Nope .." you made with your eyes closed and Mina laughed quietly.

You blinked against the darkness of the room as you turned your head to face her. Your girlfriend was hunched over you naked, looking guiltily at you. After staring at her for a moment, you reached out your hand to reach behind her head and carefully pulled the hair tie out of her hair. Long red hair fell down her face and the ends of her hair tickled your cheeks.

"I'm done with everything now .." she whispered, smiling gently.

"Now is half past ten ..", your hand slid from the back of her head to her cheek to linger there.

"Now is a little bit late.."

"I know and I'm sorry .." she muttered and you could hear the regret in her voice. But a simple "sorry" wasn't enough for you anymore.

You sighed before you sat up and leaned against the headboard of the bed.

"Look, I know you have to work a lot, but sometimes it's just too much you know?"

Mina, who had also leaned against the headboard, nodded shortly before you continued.

"It's not about that the whole thing can't be healthy for you. I mean more us ... Although that might be a bit selfish, I know you love your work, but I uhm .. I don't know- you know, you work all the time and even on weekends and I know it's not your fault, but I just can't do this anymore..I'm sorry that I claim your affection so much, but I just need you and you have no time .. "

Carefully you looked over at Mina, who sadly returned your gaze.

"I'm sorry .." she whispered and grabbed your hand to pull you close to her so you could rest your head on her chest.

"I'll do better, I promise .."

"I know I'm no better myself .." you muttered as she began to comb through your hair gently.

"As a professor at this college, I have to work a lot too, but not until 10 p.m."

"I'll do better .." she repeated and you smiled before leaning over to press your lips against her cheek for a moment.

"That's all I want .." you pulled back and lay back on your side of the bed. Your girlfriend was not long in coming and lay behind you before she put an arm around you and pulled you back to her.

"What do you think if we go out after work tomorrow ..?" She whispered in your ear.

You hummed in agreement. "That's a great idea..".

"Yes?"

"Yeah .." you muttered with your eyes closed.

"Good night Mina ..".

"Good night baby .."

---------------

You slammed the car door angrily before turning around to stomp up the steps to your front door. You were angry. Very angry. After you hurried to get off work as quickly as possible, you drove to the restaurant where you had an appointment, only to wait an hour for someone who didn't come and now you drove back home and then to see Mina's car parked in the garage.

"Wilhemina fucking Venable .." you shouted as you opened the front door.

"How dare you humiliate me so much ..".

You ran to her workspace and as you expected she was sitting at her desk in front of her laptop and seemed to be working. Her brown eyes widened when she saw you angrily standing in the doorway.

"I'm so sorry ..", she stammered and got up.

"Oh of course you are .." you hissed with narrowed eyes.

"I called you 4 times while I sat in this stupid restaurant for an hour .. You can't imagine how embarrassing it was, the waiter felt so sorry for me that I didn't have to pay for my tea .. "

Your girlfriend stared helplessly at you.

"Like I said, I'm sorry, Y / N .. i was just so busy and then I forgot .."

"So do you admit you've forgotten? You know, at one point I thought you might be doing this on purpose because you think it's funny."

"I never could, I-", she began, but you raised your hand to silence her.

"The only problem is that you always do that .." you bit your lip.

"You promise me so often that you will spend time with me only to then skip it for your work .. Then just leave it straight away and I don't always have to make myself hopes, only to be disappointed ..".

"Y / N please .. I'm as good as finished .. We can still go somewhere and have dinner ..", she looked at you desperately, but you just shook your head.

"Just forget it, Mina .." you muttered before turning around to leave her workspace . She looked after you sadly before let out a frustrated moan and slumped back into her desk chair.

How could she have forgotten?

Reluctantly, she picked up her phone and dialed the directory assistance number like the night before.

"Hello, you are connected to Directory Assistance .." said the same soft voice as last night.

"Alice ..", Mina remarked and didn't really want to notice.

"Ohh you're the rude woman from last night .." Alice laughed on the other end of the phone.

"The one with the impatient girlfriend .."

"Now more likely the one with the hating girlfriend ..".

"What did you do wrong?", Mina could hear real concern in the woman's voice and that confused her. She didn't even know this woman.

"She's upset because I always move her for work .." she mumbled.

"It's not your fault if you have to work."

"Exactly! ..", Mina shouted loudly and was surprised by her own volume.

At the other end it was quiet and Mina noticed that the whole thing was more than just private right now. She cleared her throat just before continuing.

"Can you find out Leigh Chaplin's phone number for me?"

"Of course..give me a minute .." Alice muttered and Mina heard Alice tapping on the keyboard through the receiver. For a brief moment Mina thought about just hanging up. That call was quite weird and had taken on a very personal direction. But just when she really wanted to hang up, Alice began to dictate the phone number to her and she had to take notes.

--------------------

Mina had decided to make amends for what had happened a few days ago. The only problem was, whenever you had time, she couldn't. And once she was done with everything, you had to work. It was a never-ending cycle that dragged you both further and further down. And the worst part was that you both knew that and still couldn't do anything about it. She loved her work as much as you loved yours and neither of you would ever be willing to sacrifice your work for the other.

And yet Mina had decided to make it up to you and that meant for her to help you with saving time. That's why she was now at the city library to bring back the books for you that you had borrowed a few weeks ago. Actually you had your own little library in your house, because you valued books very much, but at some point all these books were read and you were both not people who read books again.

And as a college professor, you had a habit of researching books rather than the internet anyway.

Here she was now, hobbling her stick through the library building. Which turned out to be quite difficult as she was holding your books in one arm and then had to go through the big building with her stick. If she were to trip and fall, she would have no way of catching herself. Mina knew that this would probably never happen, but still she didn't like the feeling.

But of course it happened as it had to, as always in such situations. It wasn't Mina who fell, but it was one of the books that slipped out of the crook of her arm and landed with a thud on the wooden floor of the library. How much she hated that ... such situations were almost unbearable for her. Simply because it was embarrassing to know that because of her scoliosis she was unable to bend down to pick up the book herself.

She wanted to swear loudly, but she knew that a library might not be the best place for this. She poked her senselesslyn stick around on the book and tried to put it upright somehow, only to grab it. But it was useless. Of course it had to be the thickest of your books that she had dropped. Her stick seemed to be against it like a thin branch.

"Let me help you .." suddenly came a soft voice from behind her and made her flinch. Mina turned around and looked into the friendly face of a petite woman with light brown hair.

"Your book ..", the woman said when Mina didn't answer and pointed to it with an outstretched finger. Again Miss Venable didn't answer and just stared at the woman in front of her. She was 100% sure she had never seen her before, but her voice ... She knew that soft voice, she just didn't know where from.

Without hesitating for another second, the strange woman bent down and picked up the book.

"You are welcome ..", she smiled and put the book back in the crook of Mina.

"Thank you ..", Mina mumbled, still staring at the woman in front of her, confused.

"I'm sorry, but do we know each other?"

"I think I would know that..", the woman laughed and suddenly Mina knew who she was looking at.

"You're Alice .." she uttered. "Alice from directory assistance ..".

Alice's eyes widened.

"Then you must be the one with the impatient, hating girlfriend .."

Mina's pale skin turned red at the other woman's words and she began tapping the floor with her stick in an irregular rhythm, as she always did when she was nervous.

"I may have exaggerated a bit .." she muttered. "She doesn't hate me ..".

"Well, I'm glad .." Alice honestly smiled before she nodded at the books in Mina's arms with her chin. "By the way, you have a very good taste in books .."

Mina's gaze followed that of the woman in front of her and landed on the book that she had dropped.

"Oh..these aren't my books, my girlfriend read them .."

"So she has a very good taste in books ...".

Mina nodded briefly while she was still staring at Alice. The fact that she had actually met this woman was so weird that it couldn't be a coincidence.

"Uhm .. I should bring the books back .." she muttered and Alice nodded quickly.

"I can wait .." said Alice.

"So .. if you want .." she added quickly when she noticed Mina frown.

Mina narrowed her eyes while she could only stare again. Alice exuded such confidence and she was so kind, it was like she couldn't help but agree.

"Okay .." Mina muttered. "Just give me a minute ..".

Alice's eyes began to glow.

"Perfect .." she said, beaming. "I'll wait outside."

Mina nodded shortly before leaving Alice to return the books.

"Where is your car?" Mina asked Alice as she stepped out of the library.

"Oh uhm I came here on foot .." Alice muttered and Mina frowned.

"It's getting dark .." she said curtly and Alice, who obviously didn't know what to do with that remark, nodded shortly.

"I can drive you home."

Mina studied Alice's face for any dislikes, but the woman just smiled again.

"That would be nice..".

Mina nodded again before going to her car with Alice.

"Well ..", Mina began after getting into the car with Alice.

"Where do you live?" She looked at Alice from the side, who was desperately trying to put the strap over her blouse so that it wouldn't crease.

"Uhm..Woodhill Avenue ..", the woman mumbled when she was finally satisfied.

"You can't be serious ..", Mina stared at Alice, not sure whether to laugh or be upset. "We live on the same street .."

"Oh really?" Alice's eyes lit up again.

Mina just hummed in agreement before starting the car.

For a few minutes they drove through the crowded streets and neither said a word. And although something like that was usually uncomfortable, at that moment it was actually quite pleasant, at least that's what Mina thought.

"Actually we know the whole neighborhood, but I've never heard of an Alice, nor have I seen you ...", she said finally as she turned into the long street of Woodhill Avenue.

"Well .. actually I don't live there .. I think I told you that I separated from my husband and since then I've been living with my daughter ..", Alice explained and Mina didn't even need to look at her to see how the woman was uncomfortable with the topic.

"I'm sorry .." she said curtly.

"Oh no .. you know, I'm happy the way it is now, at least I'm happier than I was with Buck a few months ago ..".

Mina didn't know what to answer, so she decided not to say anything again.

"Do you know the people who live in this house?" Alice suddenly asked and pointed to the building that Mina referred to as her home. "Venable and Y / L / N are their names .. My daughter told me that everyone is afraid of them .."

Mina stared at Alice and when she realized that the woman was serious, she started to laugh.

"Is it really that bad that everyone is afraid of us?", Mina said and couldn't help but grin as she watched the eyes of the woman next to her widen.

"Wait..I- you live in the house with your girlfriend?" Alice stammered and Mina nodded.

"I'm so sorry ... God ..this embarrassing .."

Alice buried her face in her hands and stared between her fingers at the house where you lived with Mina.

"Well, it's a nice house ..", she muttered, trying to get out of this situation somehow. Mina just snorted in amusement before continuing down the street with the car.

"Which house does your daughter live in?"

"In the green one over there .." Alice muttered and Mina's eyes landed on a green low-rise building.

"Ohh your daughter is Evangeline ..", Mina remarked as she parked the car in front of the house.

"You know her?" Alice sounded confused.

Mina nodded.

"I've never really spoken to her before, but I know her .."

"Okay .." Alice frowned before reaching for the seat belt to unbuckle her.

"That's when I notice, I don't even know what your name is ..".

"Miss Venable .." Mina said curtly and bit the inside of her cheek.

"uhm..or Wilhemina .."

Alice smiled.

"Well, then thank you, Wilhemina, for taking me home .."

"Good Night, Alice ..", Mina muttered and had to smile again.

"Good Night .." Alice repeated before getting out of the car and disappearing into the green house. And Mina couldn't help but stare after her.

In her mind, for whatever reason, she was back on the day the two of you had met in the flower shop where you had been working at the time. Even then, she had wanted to smile all the time.

When Mina finally stood in front of the house for a few minutes and finally decided to go home, she felt nothing but guilty feelings and she did not know who these feelings were for: Alice, because Mina had let her go or you, because she felt exactly the same things right now as she did when you and Mina first met.

----------------------

It was Saturday evening and Alice was on her way to the house of the interesting woman she had met in person a few days ago. Somewhere she had a guilty conscience, as it was already 10 p.m. and it was probably impolite to disturb Mina so late, but she really wanted to see Wilhemina again and at the same time she really wanted to get to know you.

She stepped onto the site of your house and hesitantly raised her hand to the bell before finally pressing her finger against the little button.

When two minutes later still nothing had moved, Alice actually wanted to turn around and go home, but then she remembered that Mina probably needed longer due to her stick and that's why she stayed. And actually a few seconds later an angry looking Mina opened the door for her.

When Alice saw Mina's angry look, she was afraid for a moment that she had more than just disturbed, but when Mina recognized her, her look softened.

"Alice .." Mina uttered happily and Alice could see the woman in front of her trying to suppress a smile, which she failed.

"Uhm..I hope I'm not bothering .." Alice gave Mina, who quickly shook her head, a bright smile.

"No .." said the woman, her face serious again. "How can I help you?"

"Uhm well, I've got something for your girlfriend .." Alice muttered as she reached into her pocket to get the book out before she passed it to Mina.

"I saw on Thursday that your friend had checked out the first part .. I thought she might want to read the second part too .. It doesn't exist in the library .."

"Oh that's nice ..", Mina picked up the book.

"But unfortunately she's not at home all weekend because of a seminar .."

Alice frowned

"Are you sure you're the one who transfers his girlfriend because of work?" She asked and watched Mina just shake her head.

"I think you have a completely wrong picture of her ..", Mina muttered and chewed her lower lip.

"Isn't that important either, do you want to come in?"

"Sure .." Alice nodded quickly and started smiling again.

When Mina led Alice into the living room, Alice couldn't help but be impressed. The walls of the great room were lined up with full bookshelves sorted in alphabetical order. A large chandelier hung from the ceiling and was not switched on because a fire was burning in a large marble fireplace. In the middle of the room was a large dark red carpet on which a dark wing chair, a couch made of the same dark fabric and a square wooden table with short table legs stood.

Alice's gaze caught on the wing chair Mina had obviously been sitting in, before Alice rang the bell. A blanket lay untidy on the seat, covered with an open book and on the table was a half-empty glass with red wine. On the edge of the glass Alice could see traces of Mina's dark lipstick.

"Excuse the chaos, please ..", she heard Mina say behind her. Alice let out a low snort.

"Chaos .." she repeated mumbling and turned to Mina. Except for the few things on the wing chair, the house seemed to have been furnished down to the last detail.

"Do you drink wine?" Asked Mina, clutching her stick with both hands.

"Sure." Alice replied curtly.

"Red or white?"

"White, please ..".

"Well, then wait here for a moment ..", Mina said before turning around to leave the room.

Alice looked after the woman briefly before going to the dark sofa to sit on it. She sat there for a moment, but then the pictures on the mantelpiece caught her eye and she got up again to walk to the fireplace to take a closer look at the pictures.

All of the pictures showed Mina and a woman Alice was unfamiliar with, but Alice was smart enough to say that it was you, Mina's girlfriend.

And she noticed that Mina was right when she said Alice had the wrong picture of you. You didn't see at all like someone that could be impatient or strict. All these pictures showed you laughing honestly, with a cocky twinkle in your eyes. And of course Mina, who, as always, tried to suppress her smile. Alice grinned at the thought.

Each picture showed a different moment, presumably dates or vacations and all in one, Alice thought that you and Mina looked cute together, at least in the photos.

"So you've already discovered Y / N's altar .." mumbled Mina, who suddenly appeared next to Alice.

"Oh yes .. It's cute ..", Alice said and took the glass of white wine, which Mina held out to her before she mumbled a little "thank you".

"I think it's rather cheesy, but it was her idea ..", Mina stared critically at the pictures and for a few seconds neither said anything.

"She's pretty .." Alice finally remarked and Mina just nodded.

"She is.."

Alice's gaze wandered carefully from the pictures to Mina, who was staring sadly down at the pictures.

"You know, I think this is what I like the most .." she suddenly mumbled and tapped an actually inconspicuous picture with her finger. It showed you both in your winter coats squinting your eyes against the flash of the selfie camera. It was also pretty blurry.

"I know it's nothing special .." Mina explained. "But the moment behind it was special ... It was New Year's Eve last year and shortly before midnight we climbed onto the roof of the skyscraper in which she lived at the time, to watch the fireworks from there. I remember exactly how she was angry when I forced her to come on the roof with me .. it was pretty cold ..

But I wanted it to be special when I propose to her .. "

Alice's eyes widened.

"Are you engaged?"

Mina shook her head and smiled sadly.

"We were engaged .. but she broke off the engagement three months ago until .. until things were settled .. You already know how complicated everything is at the moment .."

Alice looked worriedly into Mina's sad eyes before slowly nodding.

"I understand .." she said softly.

"You know, I really love her, but it's just so weird .." Mina pinched the bridge of her nose. "I met her a couple of years ago in the flower shop she worked and earned next to nothing and actually had a shitty life, and now she's been working as a professor for a college for a few months and is finally happy with that... and that is great, don't get me wrong, but we hardly have no time for each other, because now she also has to work long hours ... and it's like she pretends that it's all my fault .. "

"I'm sorry .." Alice muttered before stretching out her arms and pulling the woman into a hug. Alice felt that Mina was uncomfortable when she lay tense in her arms, but when she wanted to withdraw, Mina quickly put her arms around Alice and hugged her back. Alice put her head on Mina's shoulder and inhaled the woman's lavender perfume. They stayed that way for a few minutes, until Mina finally cleared her throat and withdrew.

"M'sorry .." she muttered without looking at Alice and Alice could see the tear marks on her face.

"We shouldn't talk about this anymore .."

Alice nodded quickly. "If I got too close to you, I'm sorry .. "

She followed Mina, who sat down on the couch and sat with enough space next to her.

"Now that you've heard my shit, I'd love to hear yours .." Mina said, giving Alice a subtle sideways look. Alice blinked a few times and thought about it for a moment. Actually, she didn't really know the woman and a divorce is not really a pleasant topic for an evening like this, but a few seconds ago Mina had stood in her arms and cried, so what was wrong with it?

"Uhm .. so I've been divorced for 2 months ..", she began and for the next two hours she told Mina the whole story with Phyllis Schlafly, the E.R.A. and that Houston had somehow opened her eyes and she'd been working on directory assistance ever since. She told Mina about her children and that she couldn't believe she was a grandma. And then she told her about Buck and that for a few years she had wondered if what she had with him was really what she wanted the rest of her life to be.

To be honest, Alice wouldn't normally have been so talkative if it wasn't because of the alcohol. She usually didn't drink, so a glass of Mina's expensive white wine was enough to get her drunk.

"You know, I only noticed now how bad that asshole was in bed ..." she laughed out loud and held onto Mina's thigh. "Well in any case our house belongs to him and I have to live with my daughter .."

Mina, who was just as sober as she was a few hours earlier, might have been a little overwhelmed by Alice's drunkenness, but somehow she found it incredibly cute.

"I'm sorry .." she muttered and Alice missed the worried look the woman was giving her.

"Yikes .." Alice suddenly made as she stared intently at the clock on the wall.

"Am I wrong or is it 14 minutes past midnight?"

Mina was shocked at her words and had to find out that it was actually that late.

"I should call your daughter, then she can pick you up ..".

"Oh let Evangeline sleep .." Alice waved her off.

"I can just sleep with you .. you know I like you, you're nice to me and don't treat me like the failure that I am. Even if you were pretty mean to me on the phone ..".

Alice grinned crookedly before leaning forward and dropping her head into Mina's lap. Mina winced and immediately got up to let Alice rudely fall back on the sofa. The drunk woman let out a low wail and looked reproachfully up at Mina.

"We should put you to bed .." she mumbled and pulled Alice into an upright position before she gently grabbed her arm and pulled her up the stairs with her.

"Uhm .. this is the guest room ...", Mina muttered as they stood in the door frame of the room. Alice stared into the beautifully decorated guest room, which was so much better than the sofa she'd slept on for months. But it wasn't what she wanted.

"You know, I can sleep with you..", she remarked and looked carefully at Mina, who seemed frozen.

"Okay .." Mina finally said before stepping out of the doorway and leading Alice into your bedroom.

A large king-size bed stood with its head against the wall and filled most of the room. One side of the bed faced the door. Alice' gaze ran to the bedside cabinet on this side of the bed and could see reading glasses, a pill box and a tube of some kind of cream next to a small lamp. She suspected that Mina slept here. The other nightstand was a lot messier. Unused kleenex were piled on top of each other while a pair of gold earrings lay on the lamp stand. On one corner of the cupboard was an empty glass, but it was definitely used. And then there was a big black hairbrush and either it was Mina's red hair that was caught in it or you had the same hair color as your girlfriend, which Alice found unlikely. On the wall next to this side of the bed was a large painting with some flowers on it. Alice's eyes wandered to a large ground plant that stood in the corner of the room. She noticed that she had seen beautiful flowers all over the house and she remembered Mina saying that you had once worked in a flower shop.

All in all it was a nice bedroom, but Alice only saw the best part when she had stepped completely into the room:

On the wall opposite the foot of the bed was a huge picture window, which allowed a view of the neighborhood and the beautiful night sky. That was the advantage if you didn't live in the city. Alice couldn't help but grin than her eyesremained hanging on the black grand piano, which crowned the bedroom on top of everything else.

"A piano in the bedroom?", She turned to Mina, grinning, who turned red for whatever reason.

"Y / N can play the piano and when I gave this one to her, she wanted it to be here ..", Mina explained and nervously began tapping the floor with her stick to a random rhythm.

"It's pretty cheesy, but you should hear her play ...".

Alice nodded quickly and put on a neutral expression again when she realized that Mina didn't like her grin.

"I imagine it would be nice to wake up in the morning and then hear the piano .." she muttered and looked back at the piano.

"Anyway ..", Mina said and held her stick tighter again.

"We're about the same size, you can have my nightgown if you want ..".

Alice turned back to her and gave the woman a grateful smile.

"That would be nice..".

Mina only nodded shortly before she left the room, only to come back a minute later in a lavender nightgown.

"I'm going to change in the bathroom while you can do this here ..", she explained as Alice took the nightgown and mumbled a little "thank you".

And less than 5 minutes later Alice, who was actually still drunk, was lying in bed next to a completely stranger and, like Mina, stared at the ceiling in silence. And yet she would have preferred nowhere and it was the first evening in weeks that she could fall asleep without any worries.

---------------------

Contrary to Mina's guess, the next morning hadn't been weird at all. Actually nothing special had happened, but Mina had been worried about Alice's drunkenness, but the woman had been kind as always.

And while everything was fine between Alice and her, she worried about what was between her and you. She felt incredibly guilty and could never have told you that a strange woman had slept in your bed. Mina knew that Alice was way too innocent to think anything about it when she and Mina shared the bed, but you didn't know Alice and you would never understand.

Miss Venable couldn't deny that the brunette had turned her head. Alice was so gentle, it was almost impossible to feel uncomfortable in her presence and Mina finally had someone who understood her and who showed her compassion.

And when you came home on Sunday night and she pushed you right against your front door to kiss you passionately, she did that not only to show you how much she had missed you, but also to prove to herself that she still loved you . Because she did, but what she felt when she saw Alice confused her feelings and it scared her.

It was Thursday afternoon and Mina was on her way home. She had tried again and again over the past few days to show you how much she loved you, but for whatever reason, that only made it worse. At least you just seemed to get a little bit more bitter every day, and she couldn't explain why.

Mina let out an aggressive growl when she sounded the horn because the light turned green and the idiot in front of her stopped driving.

She had got out of work late and now had to hurry to get home, even if she didn't really want to go there. You'd only be disappointed again because she was late again.

Nervously, she drummed her fingers on the steering wheel as she drove home as fast as she could. She was almost in your street when she spotted none other than Alice on the pedestrian path and automatically her bad mood had flown away. Mina stopped next to Alice on the side of the road before pulling down the passenger door window to see Alice's surprised face.

"Jesus Mina .." Alice exclaimed, clutching her chest.

Mina raised an eyebrow and grinned.

"I thought church mice dont swear ..".

"Actually, I don't swear either .." Alice stammered. "But do you have any idea how scary it is when someone pulls up their car next to you?"

"So am I someone then?"

"No .. but .. you know what I mean ..".

Mina nodded curtly before leaning forward to open the passenger door.

"I guess, you want to go home?"

"Oh yes ..", Alice smiled gratefully at Mina before climbing into the car.

"So how are you Mina?" Alice asked after they had driven for a few minutes.

"M'fine ..", Mina mumbled and was well aware that she was lying.

"Good to hear .." Alice said, sounding in as good a mood as ever.

"How did Y / N find the book?"

Fuck.

Mina bit her lip.

"So uhm..I didn't give it to her..Y / N doesnt know you were with me .. "

"Oh ..", uttered the woman next to her and didn't sound that happy anymore.

"I may not be allowed to interfere, but I think you should talk to her .."

"About what?" Mina frowned.

"About how you feel .. Tell Y / N that you feel misunderstood and make it clear to her that it is not your fault ..".

Mina didn't answer and concentrated on driving again.

"You know, communication is the most important thing in a relationship, so talk to her, I think that might help .."

Great, thought Mina and bit the inside of her cheek. Talking about feelings, that was exactly her thing.

She stopped in silence next to Alice's daughter's green house.

"Thanks, Mina ..", Alice mumbled and wanted to open the car door to get out, but Mina stopped her by locking the whole car.

Alice turned to her in confusion before Mina grabbed her by the collar of her blouse, pulled her close and pressed her lips against Alice's.

Alice let out a shocked whimper and Mina immediately withdrew.

For a few seconds both women stared at each other. Alice looked totally overwhelmed and horrified, while Mina slowly realized what she had just done.

Without a word she opened the car doors and not a second later Alice jumped out of the car before running into the house.

A few minutes passed and Mina didn't move an inch. She stared at the street in front of her, trying to understand what had just happened.

All she wanted was to solve the problems between you and her and now she had kissed another woman. Damn it.

She let out a loud scream and hit the steering wheel before leaning forward to lean her forehead against it. A few more minutes passed while she cried against the leather. She hated being so emotional, right now when so many feelings were boiling in her at the same time and she couldn't define all of these things.

After she had calmed down a bit, she took a few deep breaths before starting the car and driving home.

"I'm home, baby .." she called in a thin voice after entering your house.

"Oh, finally ..", she heard you sigh before you appeared in the hallway. Your usual smile faded when you saw her and you frowned.

"What?" Mina asked nervously and chewed her lower lip.

"You have lipstick on your face ..", your voice sounded dark and made Mina nervous.

"Oh .. it must be smeared .." she said and smiled shakily.

"This is not your lipstick .."

Mina's smile froze and she stared at you.

"So you're really having an affair .." you growled and she could see tears glistening in your eyes.

"What the- Y / N..No ..", Mina's voice faltered as she watched you turn around and pointed with your finger to follow you before you led her into your study.

"If you're not having an affair, what is that ..", you opened one of your desk drawers and put a white lace bra on it.

"I found it under our bed and it can't be yours .. you're not wearing white underwear .."

Mina stared at Alice's bra hanging on your finger.

"Okay, how long?", You looked at her piercingly.

"I uhm- We dont-" Mina struggled for words and clung to her cane.

"You just can't be serious .." you yelled. "All I want is your affection and while I give everything to hang out with you, you fuck someone else?"

"I'm not having an affair, Y / N ..", Mina tried to calm you down and held up a hand.

"Oh, then explain to me why I find strange underwear under our bed and why your face is such a mess .. You know, you could have at least tried to hide the whole thing ..".

"Please let me explain ..", Mina chewed her lower lip and briefly considered what to say.

"Well I know you from the directory assistance ..-"

"Ohh, phone sex..", you interrupted her and raised an eyebrow.

"What the hell, no y / n ..", Mina hissed.

"It turned out that she lives in the neighborhood and then she was here on Saturday and slept here, more not .."

"More not? Are you kidding me?", You spat and ran your hair through. "You let this stranger sleep in my bed and you don't tell me about it? .."

Mina didn't know how to answer it, so she just kept silent.

"Did you have sex?" You asked as you crossed your arms and chewed your lower lip.

"She never could, she-"

"Okay, I'll ask differently ..", you pinched the bridge of your nose.

"Did you want to have sex with her?"

Mina stared at you with wide eyes. In her mind she traveled back to Saturday night when she had been lying in bed next to Alice and staring at the ceiling. She remembered it well, how disgustedt she was of herself, but all she wanted to do at the moment was bend over the innocent woman to do the dirtiest things to her. Things Alice didn't even dare to dream of. All she wanted was to hear the desperate whimpering of the women and how she shouted her name.

But Mina could never have done that, partly because her loyalty was yours and partly because Alice was far too innocent for something like that.

"Wow .." you mumbled when she didn't answer.

"And then that bitch kissed you today ...?"

"Don't call her that ..", Mina defended Alice. "And besides, I kissed her ..".

"Oh..That's even better ..." you screamed as tears ran from your eyes.

"Congratulations Wilhemina, something like that is called an affair ..".

Angrily you threw the bra at Mina before you ran past her back into the hallway. Mina followed you and watched sadly as you packed your handbag with simple things.

"I'm going to see my mother .." you explained without looking at her while you put on your jacket. "I have to think about a few things ... I have no idea how long I'll be gone ... I also have no idea if I'll ever come back ...".

That was the last thing you said before you ran out of your house and left her with all the guilt.

-----------------------

You spent three weeks with your mother. Three long weeks of thinking about everything that had happened. You loved Mina so much, and the fact that there was probably someone else almost killed you. And actually you hadn't meant to come back to her, no matter that all your things were still in her house, but you were too scared that you would then have to see how she got over you and went on with her life.

After all, it was your mother who persuaded you to go to Mina to talk to her.

And now you stood in front of the door of your house and at least from the outside it looked exactly as you had left it. You bravely raised your hand to the door to knock gently on it.

And when Mina opened the door a minute later, you couldn't help but stare at her. You thought you looked like shit, but Mina topped it all. The actually proud woman was just a pile of misery when she opened the door for you that day. The red hair curled untidily over the fabric of her pajamas as she trembled on her stick. She was obviously in pain and probably hadn't taken her pills, something you usually reminded her of. You looked carefully into her face, which seemed even paler than usual, and noticed how she squinted her eyes against the sunlight, she didn't seem to have left the house for a long time.

For a moment you both stared at each other and you felt guilt creep up inside you.

"Can I come in?" You finally asked and looked carefully into her cloudy eyes that were staring down at you. Mina nodded slowly.

"It's your home ..." she muttered before stepping out of the doorway and hobbling into the living room. Without hesitation you ran after her after the door had closed behind you. You sat down next to Mina, who was staring into the empty fireplace, on the couch and also stared at the fireplace, but your attention was focused on the photos on the mantelpiece.

"You didn't take your pills .." you mumbled and she just hummed in agreement.

"..uhm, how are you?" you tried again before carefully looking at her from the side.

"M'great .." she muttered.

"Okay.."

"And how are you?" She asked while she was still staring into the fireplace.

"I'm great too."

Mina snorted.

"So we're both liars."

You ignored her comment and got to the real reason you came.

"Okay Mina, uhm i dont know- So about this woman .. I don't know what you had or just didn't have with her ..-"

"I had nothing with her ..", she interrupted you with a growl.

"You understand that I can understand that pretty badly?", You bit your lower lip and watched as Mina shook her head.

"I think you should get to know her .." she muttered and you frowned.

"So are you still in contact with her?"

Mina shrugged her shoulders.

"You should get to know her," she repeated.

"Okay .." you raised both hands in surrender. "Tell me when and where and I'll be there ..".

"Are you coming home then?" She whispered as she finally turned away from the fireplace and her injured eyes met yours.

"I .. I don't know ..", you stammered. "Please let me get to know this woman first .."

Mina nodded just before she got up and left the living room.

"What are you doing?" You called after her, confused.

"I'll call her .. "she muttered.

Your eyes widened.

"She's not coming here now, is she?"

"No ..", Mina called from the hallway. You didn't answer and after a few seconds you heard her talking softly to someone before she came back into the living room and stood in the doorway.

"You will meet her tomorrow in the café next to the library ..", she explained.

"Tomorrow I have to work late .."

"I know .." she said. "That's why you don't meet until 6 pm .."

"Okay .." you nodded briefly and stared at her for a few seconds.

"Uhm, I actually wanted to take some clothes with me .. For three weeks I've had to wear the shit my mother still had from me .."

"It's your home..", Mina replied shortly as she again clutched her stick with both hands.

You jumped up from the sofa to run past her up the stairs. In your dressing room you quickly packed a few clothes in an old sports bag before you turned around and actually wanted to go again, but then the white bra of this woman caught your eye, which was lost in the window sill. You knew stuffing that stupid thing in your gym bag might not be a good idea, but you would do anything to break the owner of this bra, for something to do with your girlfriend.

You ran back down the stairs where Mina was waiting for you in the hallway.

"I should go now .." you muttered as she stared at you expectantly. She nodded sadly.

"Uhm..Can I hug you?" She asked quietly and looked at you carefully.

"uh..of course ..", you nodded slowly before suddenly finding yourself in her arms again. She hugged you so tight that you were afraid you would suffocate. Her red hair tickled your face and for the first time in three weeks you could inhale her lavender perfume while she clung to you like her life depended on it.

"I am so sorry ..", she whispered and you swallowed when you felt guilty again.

"I should go now .." you repeated and withdrew from her arms.

She just nodded before you stumbled to the front door.

"Uhm..Y / N ..", she called after you when you were already out the door. You turned back to her and looked at her questioningly.

"Yes?"

"Alice didn't do anything wrong, so please don't kill her tomorrow ..".

You nodded just before turning to go to your car.

Alice.

--------------

"Damn .." you cursed as you nervously stared at your watch.

18:23

You parked your car in the library parking lot and walked briskly to the café.

Your gaze wandered through the almost empty room. Two men were sitting at a table and playing chess, an old woman was sitting in a corner and drinking coffee, and then your gaze was fixed on the graceful figure of a woman who was sitting with her back turned to you. It has to be her, you thought as you stared at her hazel hair curled up on a pastel colored blouse.

You got a little nervous when you approached her from behind.

"Uhm..Alice ..?" You asked and the woman winced slightly before turning to you and staring into her friendly eyes.

"You must be Y / N .." she said with a bright smile and got up.

"Uhm..ja .." you mumbled with a frown before you sat down across from her.

"I'm sorry ..I'm late .."

"Oh its okay .." Alice waved her hand before she sat down again. "Mina told me about your work .."

"Did she?", You looked at her confused and she just hummed in agreement.

You used the next few seconds to take in the woman in front of you and understood what Mina had meant. Alice looked so harmless and didn't fall into the category of the horny neighbor slut at all.

You cleared your throat and pointed with your index finger at the cup in front of you.

"What's this?"

"Tea," Alice said curtly. "She told me that you drink tea .."

The furrow on your forehead only got a little deeper as you pulled your eyebrows together a little further.

"She seems to have told you a lot about me .."

"I also know that you play the piano .." Alice replied, sounding kind of proud.

"She had to explain the piano in our bedroom .." you growled darkly as you remembered that this woman had slept in your bed.

"Y / N, she loves you .." she said and looked at you piercingly.

"I'm not sure about this.."

"Okay .." Alice sighed before starting to tell you the whole story from her point of view. How Mina had called her directory assistance late at night, how they met by chance in the library and how she ended up at your home on Saturday evening.

You listened to her attentively without interrupting her and with everyoneSentence made you feel a little worse because everything she said made sense.

"You must know, I never kissed a woman before and- you know ..." Alice muttered, staring at the table.

"And I thought it was a sin all my life and when Mina kissed me I wasn't really happy at first. You know, I was with her on a Tuesday two weeks ago to talk to her about it and she was really sad..- "

"Did she tell you she loves you?" You interrupt her.

"She-" Alice's voice faltered. "She apologized and said she was confused .."

You stared at her in silence.

"I don't want to offend you, Y / N, but Mina feels totally misunderstood by you .. She tries to do everything right and you reject her .. As if it was her fault that she has to work so hard .. And even if she doesn't seem like anyone that gets involved with something like that, she feels totally terrible about it all .. You didn't see how she cried when I was with her that Tuesday .. "

You looked at Alice sadly when you understood what she meant.

"Damn I'm such an idiot .." you muttered, rubbing your hair.

"There's something else, Y / N .." Alice sat up straight before continuing.

"When I was with her on Tuesday, I kissed her again ..".

Her words made you freeze.

"You did what?"

"You already understand me .." Alice said, looking at each other nervously.

"Did she kiss you or did you kiss her?"

"I kissed her."

"Okay .." you frowned.

"She loves you .." Alice repeated, putting her hand on yours.

Tears stung your eyes.

"But she loves you too ..", you croaked as you felt warm tears running down your face. Alice reached out her hand to wipe the tears from your face.

"Maybe .." she said softly. "But you mustn't be mad at her for that, it's not her fault .. Mina and I don't have an affair or anything, she loves you too much for that .."

"And do you love her?"

Alice thought for a few seconds before answering.

"I don't know to be honest .. This is all new to me, if you get what I mean .."

You nodded slowly and thought for a moment about everything she had just told you.

"I uhm .. thanks for trying to explain everything to me .." you finally said.

The woman in front of you smiled gently before taking her hand back.

"I hope you don't hate me now or anything.."

"Oh no!" You shouted loudly. "You are really kind .."

"Thank you," Alice muttered, her eyes shining a little more.

You stared at her for another moment and you could totally understand that Mina found this little sunshine attractive.

"Uhm by the way .." you started and reached into your handbag.

"I uhm .. I brought your bra .."

You put the bra on the table and pushed it over to the woman.

"Thank you .." Alice mumbled embarrassed and blushed, which made you grin.

She was really cute.

And that was your first "date" with Alice. Although one would call this educational talk less than a date. That same evening you drove back home and by home you meant Mina and not your mother's house.

The following months were more than overwhelming for you, Mina and Alice. Mina and you both applied for less working time at your work, which you also received and you had more time for each other.

That wasn't what overwhelmed you so much, the problem was, that it was pretty difficult for all 3 of you to come to terms with how you felt about each other.

After all, Mina got along best with it because she was the one of you who had been confronted with it the longest.

For her sake you accepted her love for Alice and began to meet the brunette more often and at some point you had to find out that you too were hopelessly in love with Alice.

Alice struggled with it though. The mere fact that she was in love with one woman scared her and then there were two. It was pretty hard for her to put aside all of her lesbian advantages and what her church said about you. Fortunately, Alice's children had different opinions and were glad that their mother was happy again after the divorce.

You and Mina were a little afraid of Alice's extended family, but they had all been nice to you and there was almost nothing better for you than to take care of Alice's grandchildren.

It took a while, but finally Alice also managed to get rid of her inhibitions and give herself completely to you.

And sometimes when you wake up between the two of them, when Mina had her arms wrapped around you from behind and when Alice was cuddled with her head to your chest and you were wondering how all this was even possible, you were probably the happiest person on earth at the same time.

And all you needed for that was the little sunshine in your arms while the red hair of your beautiful protector tickled your face.

#wilhemina venable x reader #alice macray x reader #wilhemina venable x reader x alice macray #wilhemina venable imagine #sarah paulson x reader #alice macray imagine

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sheloooveswomen · 2 years ago

Text

quarantine - headcanon

masterlist

prompt: this is so two years ago but i felt like imagining it. idk this is kinda boring sorry. working on something else.

includes: billie dean howard, lana winters, cordelia goode, sally mckenna, audrey tindall, ally mayfair-richards, wilhemina venable, diane sherman, alice macray, tammy, and xandra terrell.

☆ billie dean howard ☆

• feels like long needed time off at first but then she doesn't know what to do with herself

• signs up for every streaming service

• hamilton being added to disney is a very good day for her

• learns the art of massage (wink wink), gets a variety of scented oils and lotions, it's a win win

• BILLIE: "If I see any cleavage, a hardened nipple through your shirt- even a sliver of ass or midriff while I'm on this video call, I will have your head."

Y/N: "Billie Dean! You want me to give you head during office hours?! I know we're at home but still."

BILLIE: "I love you but so help me god. I'm a weak woman."

☆ lana winters ☆

• gets an audible membership to stay busy

• listens while reading a kindle copy because although she loves hearing it performed, she neeeeds a 'book' in her hands

• dabbles in watercolor/landscape painting when boredom really hits her

☆ cordelia goode ☆

• supreme immune system

• consistently up to date on all the facts

• always checking on the girls (whether they're staying at the academy or attending virtually)

• casts protection spells and makes remedies for the witches

• tries to have non-school activities planned so no one gets cabin fever, let's them have 'parties'

• big group sleepovers (nail painting, hair braiding, baking, ride a mattress down the stairs, play wii/just dance, karaoke)

☆ sally mckenna ☆

• oh wait she can't leave the hotel anyways lmao

• gains a true crime show/forensic files obsession tho

☆ audrey tindall ☆

• Audi is a real people person so staying inside is hard for her

• starts and stops a crazy amount of hobbies

• puzzles, paint by number, jewelry making, glass cutting, making clay picture frames, crochet, friendship bracelets, resin earrings, nail art, diy-ing clothes she doesn't wear anymore

• does zoom skits with fellow actor/theater friends for fun and to raise money

☆ ally mayfair-richards ☆

• her anxiety doubles during the pandemic

• takes every precaution to keep you all safe and takes setting guidelines for Michigan very seriously

• she distracts herself by making sure Oz is on track for school and isn't ever bored

• orders a lot of board games for all three of you (and some couple ones for just the two of you)

• makes a sapphic/queer movie and show list to go through together

• tries new recipes (puts the best ones on a list to add to the menu when the restaurant opens up eventually)

☆ wilhemina venable ☆

• this woman loves her home and hates interacting with anyone that isn't you

• quarantine is a dream for her

• mina doesn't like to sit and 'relax'

• goes through majority of her library before ordering a shit ton of books to add to her collection

• won't admit it but the great amount of time together opened her up to cuddling more often and listening to/"suffering through" your music

• reading with headphones playing her classical music while you lay with your head in her lap as you watch tv is one of her favorite pastimes

• she will not tolerate distractions while working

☆ diane sherman ☆

• becomes obsessed with podcasts and asmr

• goes hand in hand with her expanding gardening time

• gets more house plants

• rearranges the furniture a lot

• crochet and macramé addict (she's freakishly good at it)

• makes coasters, cup cozies/sleeves, hats, scarves, cardigans, vests, hanging plant holders

☆ alice macray ☆

• home renovation shows/magazines/blogs are her new hobby

• finds projects/little things to fix around the house and researches them before ordering supplies online

• online shopping addict

☆ tammy ☆

• AU where she doesn't have kids

• binge watches all the housewives shows

• quarantining with the gang at Loubbie's fully stocked house (borderline mansion) in upstate new york

• video/board game tournaments with the group

☆ xandra terrell ☆

• at home date nights

• bartender/chef at heart = quarantine cocktail and dessert connoisseur

• mixes drinks to go with dinner, eventually tries to make them blindfolded or with bottle tricks, has you quiz her on the recipes, learns new ones

• makes cake/cupcake flavors you didn't even know existed, tries fancier pastries too

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adripaulson · 4 years ago

Text

Put your head on my shoulder

Words count : 845

Warnings : None, only fluff !

Writer note : There is my first story ! I really wanted to write one for Alice because she is my baby and she deserves more credits 🥰 I hope you will like it as much as I liked writing it. I apologize in advance for the mistakes, English is not my native language .

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvxagNIBVLU

Being the daughter of Phyllis Schlafly was hard and exhausting to be honest. You always had to be perfect, have good grades, to be dressed properly. You had to be just like your mother and this implied supporting her in her campaign against the ERA. You were already in college and most of your friend did not understand your mother’s hate against the ERA and let’s be honest : you did not either.

To be simple, you always had to hide who you are, what you like. What were you ? Well, you were a lesbian. What did you like ? Well more like who did you like : your very own mother’s bestfriend, Alice Macray.

You always loved Alice, she was so sweet and was more interesting than your mother. And god she was beautiful. The way her smile could enlighten a whole room, how her brown eyes were always looking at you with a mix of love and happiness. She was so pretty it hurts. You could always count on Alice to help you. She gave you a ride every time you needed one, helped you and your siblings when your mother was away for her campaign. You were very close, so close that you called her Alice. You appreciated all of this, of course you did, but it all became more complicated when you started to notice the feelings you had for her. You told your brother John about it because you two had the same secret. He advised you to spend less time with Alice and even if it broke you heart, that’s what you did, for a while.

However, your mother threw one of her famous parties ( you hated them obviously) and the best thing you could do during theses nights was to drink, stay outside or in your bedroom. You were in the kitchen when you saw her. Beautiful as ever, attached to her husband’s arm. She saw you looking at her and smiled at you. You looked down to avoid her. You realized you couldn’t stay there anymore so you went upstairs in your room.

Fifteen minutes later, you heard a knock and tell the person to come in. You found yourself very surprised to see Alice. She sat on your bed, next to you.

“(Y/N), did I do something wrong ?”, she asked with what appeared to be tears in her eyes.

You tried to stay calm and said with a neutral ( but with a sense of sweetness) tone “ What ? No Alice, of course not, why would you think that ?”

She blushed and looked down embarrassed “ Well I haven’t seen you for a while now… And I mean… I missed your company and talking to you and… I missed you…”

Your heart was racing, your breath became faster and shorter, you tried to understand Alice’s words and feelings “ Well, I-I was busy. I am sorry I made you feel like this”.

Both of you sat there, in silence, with an electric tension in the air. An idea popped in your head, you got up, and started to play a record of Paul Anka. You approached next to Alice and put your hand in front her to invite her. She took your hand immediately and put the other one on your hips ( a move that gave you chills down your spine).

Put your head on my shoulder

Hold me in your arms, baby

Squeeze me oh-so-tight

Show me that you love me too

“ You are very good dancer honey” she said smiling.

You bite your lower lips, blushed shyly and looked down. She made you look at her by lifting your chin up and stroke your cheek gently. You were so close, closer than you ever been, you were so close that you could kiss her and scent her perfume.

Put your lips next to mine, dear

Won't you kiss me once, baby?

Just a kiss goodnight, maybe

You and I will fall in love (you and I will fall in love)

And with those words, she leaned forward, and her lips captured yours. Her lips were so soft, you melted under the kiss. It was very gentle, you did not rush, you made it last as if you wanted to make the world stop in order to make this moment last forever. You backed off when you felt that air was necessary. You buried your face in the crook of her neck, smelling her sweet perfume. She held you closer and you two kept dancing to the sound of the record playing

Put your head on my shoulder

Whisper in my ear, baby

Words I want to hear

Tell me, tell me that you love me too (tell me that you love me too)

You did not know if this will happen again, but you knew that Alice Macray was your little secret and you knew that you will cherish her longer than all the songs in the world. You will cherish her until your last breath.

#alice macray #alice macray imagine #alice macray x reader #mrs america #sarah paulson #sarah paulson imagine #sarah paulson x reader #wlw #mrs america imagine

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lotties-ashwagandha · 2 years ago

Text

NEVER HAVE I BEEN A BLUE, CALM SEA (part 9 of ?)

pairing: alice macray x reader

word count: 1002

notes and warnings: I’ve popped out like 3 oneshots today whewww,, i have a venable x reader x billie fic in the making too,, so look out for that 👀

summary: from the moment you saw her, you swore to give her everything... or at least give her a Woody Guthrie album.

taglist: @thedeconstructionist @cordeliass @paulsonsratched @goodeday2u @traumatisedfangirl @devriesgoode

You slipped out of the bed, moving with as much stealth as you could, though you doubted that Alice would wake up even if you brought in a marching band.

After changing your clothes, you sighed and leaned against the dresser, your head pounding. Everything ached, and you cursed every bit of last night that you had not spent with Alice.

You left the hotel room, and you were almost the only one in the lobby of the hotel. You assumed everyone was still utterly wrecked from last night.

After pouring yourself a cup of coffee from the stand next to the check-in, you sat on one of the sofas in the lounge.

Last night had gone so fast. You could remember almost everything that had happened, though most of it came in a blur, your memory coming back in waves.

You remembered the way Alice had kissed you in the park in front of everyone. And you remembered the panic that filled her features when you heard the voice of Phyllis Schlafly.

Phyllis had been rounding the corner with a small group of her supporters, shouting louder than she should have, and you and Alice had broken away from one another just in time for her to place her eyes on the two of you.

In her excitement, Phyllis had rushed over to Alice. She had asked her where she’d been, who she had been with, why her mascara was running down her face.

Alice had not answered. She merely watched Phyllis with a look you would never truly understand the depth of – it rang of despair, of shame, of pride. She was indecipherable.

Only then had Schlafly turned to you, eyeing you as if you had just told her you planned to kidnap her. She asked you if you had been with Alice for the whole night, to which you declined.

“I’m sure you won’t mind if I speak with Alice in private, then,” she’d said, and had dragged Alice to the other end of the room. Every so often the two of them would glance at you.

You felt the eyes of the women Phyllis had come with searing into you. They stared with no remorse, with no attempt to hide what they were doing.

And there you were, stuck in the middle.

In that moment, you knew exactly how Alice had felt for the last month, caught between two opposing worlds. She loved both of them… she thought she loved both of them.

One of them she truly adored – the other promised her safety in an inalterable place of captivity.

When Alice had come back, she was crying again.

You almost threw yourself at Phyllis, overcome with an insatiable urge to beat her to pulps. The only thing that held you back was the knowledge that such an exchange would only fuel the fire that had already caused so much destruction.

Alice had not said another word as the two of you made your way back to your hotel room.

She barely said anything else to you at all as the two of you went to bed, and you hardly slept, wondering what Phyllis had told her. Alice had never been so quiet around you, and the uneasiness it gave you was indescribable.

You glanced up, brought back to the present moment by the sound of footsteps coming into the silent lounge. To your surprise it was Alice coming towards you. She had changed clothes, and had not bothered to put on any makeup.

Wordlessly, she sat down beside you on the sofa.

You offered her your coffee, but she declined.

“How do you feel?” You asked.

“Fine,” she replied quietly, refusing to meet your eyes.

“Did I wake you?”

“I reached for you and you weren’t there, and that woke me.”

Something about the way she said it made your heart drop.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.”

And though last night you had felt more in love than ever, today you could not have felt more distant from one another.

“What did Phyllis say last night?” You whispered, nervous of what her response would be.

“It doesn’t matter,” she said, and offered you a small smile, but you could see the pain looming in her eyes. “You know, I was thinking about leaving early.”

“Oh… well, we can leave early, then, I suppose.”

She inhaled sharply. “No, I was thinking I would leave with one of my friends. She was leaving early anyway.”

“Are you sure? I really don’t mind.”

“I’m sure.”

You had no words. Her expression was empty, unreadable. She had never been like this with you before.

Alice stood, meeting your eyes once more, and you couldn’t help but feel like she was saying goodbye. You could see the emotion coursing through her eyes, the love accompanied by the despair, and before you knew it you were fighting back the lump forming in your throat.

She turned and began to walk away.

“Alice,” you called softly, and she turned. She waited for you to continue, for you to tell her that she was all you needed, that the two of you could create a life together without the suffocating pressure that had been thrown upon you.

She waited for you to tell her that everything would work out — and she would have believed you. All she needed was one reassurance.

Yet you were waiting for the same thing. You were waiting for her to tell you once more that she loved you, that you had not destroyed everything she had, that she wanted a life with you and you alone.

But you only shook your head, dismissing her.

And she walked away.

With the searing pain of change burning inside of her, she walked away.

Love had built this fire. Love would burn the world to ashes, or it would bow to worldly desires.

Yet no matter how big the fire had gotten, no matter the destruction that had happened, still she had walked away.

#alice macray #alice macray x reader #sarah paulson x reader #sarah paulson #mrs america #lgbtq+#wlw

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safic4-m · 2 years ago

Text

💖Do you like what you see?

Pairing: Alice Macray x Fem Lector

Author’s Note: I have nothing ahgg…I was absent for these two months as they didn’t know how to appreciate Lady Dimitrescu’s work.

Number of words: 726

~Master list~

One-shot

Wattpad

-Miss Macray will give you a tour,- finishes the nun after having explained the rules of the place.

You meet a brunette a little bit shorter than you, wearing the damn uniform you will have to wear, but she looks…cute.

-Can I know why you’re here…I mean it’s rare for someone to arrive in the middle of the year,- biting her lip, as a red tinges her cheeks.

-I was caught with the headmistress’ daughter,- you answer lightly.

-But what were you doing?- she asks without understanding what you mean.

-You are so innocent,- she answers laughing softly.

Alice ignores your comment and continues with the tour.

It’s ironic that you were sent to an all-girls school after getting caught with your headmistress’ daughter; you hate that it’s a religious school, but you already had your eye on Miss Macray.

- - - -

You were sick of this fucking shitty fucking school, you literally had the nuns all over you, you were punished for everything, you were forced to pray, your roommate was a pain in the ass and you couldn’t leave unless it was an emergency.

At least you had managed to get close to Alice and you were amazed at how innocent she is, but a part of you just wanted to corrupt her, until there was nothing left.

The pool had become your favorite place since you came to this fucking academy, you spent most of your free time in the water enjoying the tranquility it gave you, you were one of the few people using it along with some senior girls.

You weren’t supposed to be here at this hour, but you couldn’t care less about that, no one was coming to check anyway; the lights come on making you dive into the water to hide.

-I know you’re there,- says a familiar voice.

You rise to the surface, reveling in the sight of Alice Macray in her nightgown, which doesn’t look bad on her at all.

-What are you doing here,- you ask, leaning against the shore.

-It’s late,- she replies, crossing her arms.

-Aha, what’s that got to do with it,- you press, wanting to get the truth out of her.

-You shouldn’t be here.

-Yes, but you, what are you doing here?- playing a mocking smile on your face

-Well… I… I was looking for you during dinner,- playing with the fabric of her nightgown, -because I wanted to tell you something.

-Really?- you ask coming out of the water.

Alice’s eyes widen like saucers at the sight of you in your swimsuit, but her gaze is fixed on your breasts, seeing your nipples, which are marked by the cold out of the water.

-Do you like what you see?- you ask, making her blush furiously.

-I’m sorry,- she apologizes, looking away.

-You don’t have to do that,- you reply, moving closer to her.

You take her jaw forcing her to look at you.

-This is not the time to be out of your room, Miss Macray,- you say a few centimeters away from her lips.

You stare at her lips for a while, before you kiss her making her cry out in surprise, but it doesn’t take long for her to reciprocate, her hands fly to your shoulders gripping you tightly, as your hands make their way to her waist.

-God, you look so fucking beautiful,- you say making her blush.

-You will not take God’s name in vain,- giving you a gentle tap on the shoulder.

-Then I’ll make you touch the sky

- - - - -

You two couldn’t keep your hands off each other, you had become addicted to her and she to you; in one of her horny moments, you ended up giving her oral sex in the chapel, in front of the Blessed Sacrament. After that Alice had forced you to apologize and pray for what you had done.

-It’s a good thing Miss Macray is leading you to the path of God,- said a nun as she saw you leaving the chapel.

-Yes, you have no idea how good it is for me to spend time with her.

-Is that so, Miss Macray?

-Yes, Sister, she goes to chapel every day now.

-Ha, maybe we should put them together,- she says before leaving.

-You will not give false testimony, nor will you lie,- sure that they will not listen to them.

-I didn’t lie to her,- she defends herself, -but I can’t believe we did it.

-Let me reward you then,- taking her hand and leading her out of the place.

#mrs america #alice macray #alice #alice macray x reader #alice x reader #sarah paulson #sarah paulson x reader

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notmanagingmymischief · 4 years ago

Note

7, 11, 13 and 17 😌

anon! :))

7 - Do you find it difficult to capture a character’s voice in fanfiction?

Sometimes. In terms of the way they speak, their mannerisms, yes, but especially for people who talk more fancy. Myrtle Snow, Miss Peregrine, are just a couple examples. They use fancier terms, they have that accent that makes them seem so much more important. So I might have trouble capturing the way that they talk, as well as the way they think in some cases. As for characters like Cordelia Goode or Alice Macray, they talk like a more “normal” person, their vocabulary is so much less complicated and gran, so I can write them easier.

11 - Do you usually think of plot, concepts, or characters first when it comes to a new project?

Honestly...not much. I never think of a plot; I get either a prompt or just some split-second decision and run with it. Let’s take my last fic, the Miss P one. I had no idea what I wanted to write about, all I knew was that I wanted r to be sassy and cocky, that was it. I do not plan ahead in the slightest, so it kinda feels like I go into a trance as I type, just letting my mind take me wherever, and then have to go back and reread the entire story (it gets problematic when they’re really long fics) to make sure I like what I came up with.

13 - What one part of writing do you think you’ve improved upon the most?

Oh my....I’m not sure actually. I think I’ve improved on everything honestly. Three to four years ago, I was writing a Willy Wonka fic (please don’t ask it’s very traumatizing to think of), and I reread it just a few months ago. And I realized just how far I’ve come. If I have to chose one thing in specific, I guess I’d say sentence structure/vocabulary. I’ve learned to actually pay attention to repeating words in the same or very close sentences to avoid repetition. I’ve come up with more words for talking than just “said”, which is really nice. And overall my vocabulary has just improved so much, because I started to actually care about the way I wrote more as I got older.

Yes I have been writing fanfiction since I was thirteen what of it-

17 - What’s a line from one of your recent works that you were really proud of?

Huh. It’s not one sentence, but I think it’s pretty funky...” I cock a single brow and smirk still, licking my lips before leaning even closer to Miss Peregrine until our faces are only a few inches apart. "What, are you going to punish me, Alma?" I can see her eyes widen just a hair and her fingers loosen on my chin in surprise. With one last wink, I spin out of her grip and march away...”

Thank you for the asks my luv!! <33

You can ask me more prompts here!

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cabensonsgirly · 3 years ago

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👼Home Is Wherever I'm With You (Alice Macray)[NSFW]👼

Alice Macray x Fem!reader

👼Part 2 of SP getting reader pregnant👼

👼Wordcount: 2714👼

👼Posted on AO3: Read Here👼

👼Content: Fluff, some angst, homophobia, Phyllis and Alice's husband are trash garbage, some smut, strap-on, wlw magic, pregnancy, Alice is an angel, mentions of religion.👼

👼There was one person who never left your side though, even if it meant they were put in the firing path of Phyllis, and that was Alice. She, in all her sweet innocence, didn’t understand why it was such a big deal that you happened to like women, surely if God didn’t want the “lovely lgbts” then he wouldn’t have created them. Alice was religious, went to church on Sundays, said grace before eating, prayed before bed, but she wasn’t the type to go around telling people that they were sinning or judge them because they weren’t religious, if anything, she just wanted people to be happy.👼

It had been a number of years since you had moved to a slightly more progressive part of town, ever since Phyllis found out that you had – as she put it – “homosexual inclinations” it was made very clearly that you were no longer welcome in that area. And because she ruled with an iron-fist, no one dared to speak out against her, even if they had said to you in private that you were still the same wonderful person they had always known.

There was one person who never left your side though, even if it meant they were put in the firing path of Phyllis, and that was Alice. She, in all her sweet innocence, didn’t understand why it was such a big deal that you happened to like women, surely if God didn’t want the “lovely lgbts” then he wouldn’t have created them. Alice was religious, went to church on Sundays, said grace before eating, prayed before bed, but she wasn’t the type to go around telling people that they were sinning or judge them because they weren’t religious, if anything, she just wanted people to be happy.

It had hurt when you moved because you had grown close with Alice and her kids, even if her husband harboured ill feelings towards you because you were a “dyke” and “we can’t let our children around that dyke, Alice” but she managed to calm him down enough so that you could still come around. But you hadn’t seen Alice and the kids much since moving, and you missed them something wicked. Yes you had spoken to them, mainly Alice, on the phone but it was brief and happened very rarely. You missed her. You missed them.

The days where she called you had you wanting them to last forever, you could wander around your home just listening to her talk about how things were going, how much she enjoyed her job, how the kids were doing in school. You found yourself feeling like a high schooler talking to their crush after school on the phone, laying down on your bed with the dumbest grin on your face. However, that grin changed to a shocked expression when you let slip how you feel about her. “Alice, fuck – sorry I know you don’t like swearing but… Alice, I love you so much and I miss you, I miss being around you and being with the kids. It’s been miserable not being able to see you, but-“ you hear a sharp intake of breath “I- I’m sorry, I have to go.” Before the line goes dead.

Seven months, twelve days, thirteen hours, and fifteen minutes it had been since that call and you hadn’t heard from her. You weren’t usually the type to count these things, even when you had important events to look forward to, you wouldn’t count down the days. You guess it was some form of way to torture yourself, counting the length of time since you fucked up one of the few good things you still had in life. She was radiant like an angel, put the beauty of the moon to shame, and you- you were like a horseman of the apocalypse, ruining everything you touched. Maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, you haven’t ruined everything you touch but you certainly have relationship wise.

You had a few spare rooms in your house, you’d hoped that one day you would be able to have your own family, a bedroom for each kid: two bedrooms and one room as the nursery. No, that was a lie, you had dreamed about having Alice live with you - be with you – the boys would have their own rooms to decorate how they please (under the watchful eye of Alice) and… a nursery so you and Alice could have a child together, so that the boys would have a little sister (hopefully) to protect from the big kids.

To be honest, you had already started making renovations on the house so that it would be better suited for a family like that anyway, the bedrooms had a fresh coat of paint, nothing that was specifically catered to boys or girls – you wanted the kids to pick the colour themselves if they wanted a change – and made sure the windows had latches to prevent them from opening too far so that no one could fall out of them.

You were most proud of the kitchen though; it was your pride and joy of the entire property. That’s where you currently find yourself, applying the final sealing coat on the marble countertop so that no liquid seeps into the pores of the material. You had music playing through the radio, just loud enough to drown out the sound of the odd car that drove by. You were humming along to this when you heard the doorbell ring, this surprised you because not many people stopped round to your place, and if they did they would usually knock. You put the paintbrush in the sink and put the lid back onto the tin of sealant before you made your way over to the door. You didn’t bother to check your appearance or anything because you thought it was probably some girl scouts or a random, so in all your messy renovation glory you swung the door open to greet whoever was on the other side.

“Hi there, what can I-“ Your voice catches in your throat and colour rushes to your cheeks as you lay eyes on the woman before you. Now you were wishing you had at least wiped the sweat from your face and the grime from your hands.

“Hi… I- I know we- I know I haven’t spoken to you since…well…” She trails off quietly, looking down. You bite your bottom lip slightly and shake your head, willing the tears to remain unshed “It’s- It’s fine Alice, really. It’s in the past… You don’t need to explain yourself. It’s fine.” The older woman shakes her head and looks at you again, her eyes glistening slightly “I want to. Can- can I come in, please?”

You step back and hold the door open so she can make her way inside, closing and locking the door behind her before leading her to the lounge. “I- I wanted to apologise for hanging up the way I did…and for leaving your life without saying anything.” She takes a seat in an arm chair, hands immediately starting to fiddle with the cushion “I just- I didn’t- I don’t”

“You don’t feel the same way. I- I know. It’s okay. I- I got over most of the hurt-“

“No- no that’s not what I meant. I didn’t understand why you felt that way and- and I didn’t understand why I- why I” she shakes her head, her grip on the cushion tightening before she blurts out “why I felt something I hadn’t felt since the joy I felt when I had my boys.” She lets out a sob and buries her face in her hands as she starts crying.

You rush over to her and wrap your arms around her gently, rubbing her back as you hush her gently. “It’s okay, it’s okay. Shhh… It’s okay, Alice” She moves so she can hug you tight, burying her face in your shirt as she continues crying. “hey, hey it’s okay. It’ll be okay. Shhh.. It’s okay, Alice.” You continue rubbing her back, only slowing down more as her breathing starts to return to normal. “There we go, there we go. It’s okay. It’ll be okay.”

She doesn’t pull back but you hear her mumble out “my- my husband- ex… he- he found me crying after the call and he asked why. I- I told him that it- it was because I think I- I was in…love with someone else. A- A woman… And- and he” she lets out a sob before continuing “he told me how- how disgusting I- I am. That- that I was going to- to ruin my- my kids. We- He filed for divorce a few weeks later… It’s- it’s supposed to be split custody but- but I guess the boys like me more so- so they stay with me a majority of the time. They asked why I was so sad, why I didn’t bake apple pie as much anymore, why I- why I never called you. I didn’t answer them for so long, just- just said it was some- some trial that God was putting me through. But… a few days ago they asked again, and- and the looks in their eyes…” she lets out a bit of a laugh “they looked like they wouldn’t judge me no matter what I said, they- they really are my boys. So…I told them.”

Your breath catches and you still your movements before continuing, encouraging Alice to continue. “I told them everything. Well- well excluding what their father said about- about me. I just- I said that their father didn’t- didn’t approve of- of who I had…fallen in love with. They- they were confused and asked how it was possible for someone to- to fall in love when already married. I said sometimes- sometimes it happens and that it- it doesn’t mean I never loved their father, but I had discovered that- that maybe I…liked women. A woman. Gosh… You should’ve seen the looks on their face, it was like I’d given them their birthday presents early. I hadn’t even told them who but… they’re so wonderful.”

She pulls back and wipes her eyes on her sleeve, giving you a small smile “I told them that the woman I was- I am in love with is you. That- that I hadn’t known what to do so that’s why I was sad for so long because I just… Anyway… They said I was silly and should go tell you everything because they miss you and want to see me happy again.”

You blush deeply and look away, a shy smile settling on your lips before Alice gently turns your head to face her. “I- I love you, yn.” She leans in and tentatively brushes her lips against yours before kissing you, you gasp softly in shock before melting into the kiss.

One year, three months, two weeks, three days, and nine hours. That’s how long Alice and her boys – your boys – have been living with you for. After she kissed you that day, she asked if she could make love to you but emphasised that you would have to guide her because she’d never been with another woman. Alice was a quick learner and once she had a solid understanding of what you enjoyed…she made it very clear that she was the one in charge in the bedroom. This surprised you but you weren’t going to complain, if the love of your life wanted to be called “Miss” in the bedroom and boss you around, you bet your fucking ass you’re going to do just that. Although she did burst into tears after you went down on her because she didn’t know something like that was supposed to feel that good.

She asked you why there was an empty room one day while the boys were at tutoring, and you told her it was because you hoped to have a baby one day… Hopefully with her. She was shocked and had blushed profusely but the smile on her face reassured you she wasn’t put off by the idea. You said you knew it wouldn’t actually be possible for her to get you pregnant but you saw a fierce determination in her eyes that made you feel like she would find a way. Alice didn’t bring it up again for quite some time, and you didn’t press about it either, just put it down to her having forgotten or maybe not actually being into the idea.

One evening while the boys were at their fathers Alice said she had something to show you, said it was really important. When you walked into the bedroom you nearly choked on your bottled water, Alice was standing there, looking down as she adjusted - what appeared to be a strap-on – to fit her comfortably. She still had her simple white bra on but to you she still looked sexy, with or without clothing you were attracted to her; the look of utter concentration on her face made you giggle though, drawing her attention to you, a blush settling on her face as she smiles.

“I- Hi. I- So I did some… I did things to try and- and figure out if there was a way I could get you…pregnant… And- well, I know you don’t always come to church but- No I didn’t ask around church, silly. Every time I prayed, I asked for there to be a time where it would be possible for me to get you pregnant, so- so I could have a baby with the woman I love. And- and so it turns out that tonight is that night. I saw a sign, and I know that sounds cra-“ You cut her off with a deep and slow kiss, hands cupping her cheeks gently before you pull back “Alice, baby, nothing you say sounds crazy to me.”

She blushes more and flusters a bit before continuing “I saw a sign, well- well what I hope was one and knew that it would be possible tonight. That- that it would be possible for me to- to” she tears up, some tears spilling onto her cheeks which you wipe away gently “to get you pregnant so we can have our baby.” You sniffle a little, having teared up at her words “Alice… You’re so- you’re so wonderful. Please take me to bed, make- make love to me.”

Alice takes your hand in hers gently and leads you to your shared bed where she lays you down gently on it before crawling on top of you, her hand stroking your cheek gently. “I love you so much, yn.”

“I love you too, Alice.”

You looked up at the woman you loved, her hand ghosting gently between your legs and roaming over your body before she starts to remove your clothing, kissing your skin as each item is removed. She trails kisses up your thighs before moving up to kiss you, her lips were still sweet from the dessert she had made, her tongue slips between her lips and runs against your bottom lip before you part them to brush your tongue over hers, you both moaning at the feeling. A gasp falls from your lips when you feel her touch your slit, fingers rubbing your clit lightly before dipping the tips of two into your pussy.

“You make the most beautiful noises, my love.”

There had never been a moment before now where you had felt so much love when having sex with someone. It wasn’t only because your girlfriend had managed to find a way to try having a baby with you – having her baby, it was because there wasn't a single moment the entire night where the love in her eyes disappeared.

You wouldn’t know if Alice’s prayers had been heard until you took a pregnancy tests a few days later, but there was a feeling in your bones that made you think that things would work out – that you would have her baby. On the off chance, or more likely chance, that you didn’t get pregnant, that would be okay too. Your sweet Alice would probably try her best to find another way though, she was determined like that.

You and Alice both shared a nice bubble bath after your lovemaking, just enjoying being in each other’s arms. “Alice baby, I love you so much. Thank you for tonight. Thank you for coming back to me. Just- just thank you.” She hums softly in response, her eyes drifting closed “I love you too, Yn. I’d always find my way back to you anyway.” You press a kiss to her head, enjoying the feeling of being content and happy with a woman you love, and with the chance of being pregnant with her child.

#Alice macray #Alice macray imagine #Alice macray x reader #sarah paulson #sarah paulson imagine #sarah paulson x reader

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