#[picture of average skinny white woman]

[vvelegrin]

man, i just want to see if there's any threads about silent hill 2 remake breaking so hard it doesn't even boot up anymore but all i find are people being evil about women on the internet

[canthelpit0]

American

Pairing: matt x poc!reader

Wordcount: 2.2K +

Summary: reader is a third culture kid. Her parents are immigrants, and she hates it. She wants to be everything she is not.

Warnings: angst, crying, hating your own culture, racism, internalized racism, middle eastern!reader, reader discerned as average, established relationship, pet names, hurt/comfort, no use of y/n, no oc; reader described to have curly hair, brown eyes and hair.

(A/N: not me reflecting lmao. asks and req are open <3 feedback is appreciated! Ps: I am Türkisch, and this isn’t meant to be racist, it’s just thoughts about myself that I used to have portrayed by y/n. This is for awareness abt internalized racism)

I hate my culture. I hate my frizzy hair, I hate the fact that my eyes are a plain brown. I hate the fact that I’m not white. I hate that when someone asks me where I’m from and I say America, they go “no where are you actually from?��. I hate my brain. I hate the way I think. I hate the way I wish I was someone else. I hate myself, and I hate the way I hate myself.

I was never considerably pretty. Well not really. Sure the facial harmony, the potential is there. But I’m just not good enough.

I wish my hair was straight.

I hate the way I hate my own culture. I really do. But I literally can’t fit into the American beauty Standards , but I can’t fit into the middle eastern ones either.

My home country is America. I was born and raised here. But both of my parents are immigrants from turkey. -Wich means we’re not very wealthy.

I hate it when people ask me where I’m from because I look ‘exotic’.

I wouldn’t consider turkey my home country. I hate it there. And I don’t know if it’s just my internalized hatred or whatever, but I do.

Even in the country itself I’m not considered Turkish enough. In the US I’m not American enough…

I’m never enough.

Not to my parents, not to my siblings, not to my boyfriend. Not to myself. I’m not good enough.

we go to turkey for vacation every year and I’m sick of it.

I speak the language enough to communicate. I hate half the food because I’m a picky eater. It hurts even more because I’m not even considered properly Turkish.

I hate the way all my cousins, except for one, live In turkey. I hate the way they’re so close to each other. And despite being in the cousins group chat, they’ll always send in pictures of them all together. Pictures that I’ll never be in, simply because I’m halfway across the world.

Years ago, whenever we visited, it didn’t matter, the fact that I live so far away, but now they were judgy.

Besides I don’t trust anything there. Sure the stuff there is cheaper, but you could literally put me in an official Nike store and I would still tell you the shoes are fake, even tho they obviously aren’t.

I did an internship at a disposition and shipping company. I know that those shoes come from the same warehouse. I just don’t trust anything Turkish.

Growing up with so many myths that my parents taught me to live by, until I realized it’s just a bunch of bullshit, made me believe that nothing purchased in turkey is of any quality.

And it’s not even to hate on the nation or anything, it’s probably my own fault.

I hate the way all the other middle easternerns are so confident in where they’re from, flexing the fact that they naturally know more languages than Americans.

But I just wish I was one of those stupid Americans. Oblivious to the rest of the world and all the flaws in human nature. I wish I was a skinny white woman born into an upper middle class American family.

But instead I have to be what I am.

I hate it when I hear people talk in my ‘native’ language. Even tho that’s the only language we speak at home.

Sometimes I feel great knowing that I have culture and just naturally great genetics, and potential and resources to be better than those stuck in a village in my ‘home’ town.

But then it dawns on me that I’m not American, even if I was born and raised here it’s not my home country. And as much as I feel like it should be and is, it’s not.

It dawns on me that I’m not white. I’m not one of them. And I never will be.

And that makes me question why Matt is even dating me.

There is so much internal self hatred and racism going on in me, yet still he chose me over those white girls.

And I don’t get it.

Every time I look at myself in the mirror I sigh. Let’s ignore the fact that I’m not white like that and will never be. Even being middle eastern, or whatever the hell turks are considered, I don’t look like that either.

I fit literally nowhere. Sure I have dark brown hair and brown eyes, I look pretty average. But I still don’t look Turkish, I don’t have that straight hair or painfully skinny body.

I let out a heavy sigh without even noticing. These thoughts were getting loud again.

I hate how strict and conservative my parents are. I hate the painful lack of empathy they show, because I always have to be perfect, when I’m oh so confused of what type of perfect.

I don’t know if they want me to be a cheerleader and prom queen and top of my class like they never could. Or if they want me to be conservative or something.

Probably the latter, but-

“What are you thinking about?” Matt’s voice suddenly snaps me out of my daze. We literally had laid down to sleep and all I could do is pity myself.

I feel a lump in my throat and only now realize how i feel like I’m going to break into sobs.

Matt must’ve heard my uneven, shaky breaths.

Matt was spooning me, his arms wrapped around my waist, holding me close to him. He rubs my sides gently, tracing shapes on my skin.

I sigh in response. I feel like I haven’t used my voice in so long. I feel like if I speak now, I’ll break into sobs.

“Baby?” He whispers softly. I feel him pull away slightly until he turns me around to face him.

“Talk to me sweetheart.”

Matt is such a kind soul. I literally didn’t tell my parents we were dating until we were already dating for 7 months, just because I was that scared. I wasn’t allowed to date or do anything intimate. As if it wasn’t normal for a teenager to want to.

“Why do you like me Matt?” I blurt out before I can think.

“First off, I don’t like you, I love you. And second where is this coming from?” He asks sweetly his eyes having a tinge of concern to them. He looks so sweet and caring.

“Why tho?” I inquire. My voice low. I know my eyes are glassy, I’m quite literally holding back tears.

Matt licks his lips and sits up. He turns the bedside table lamp on. The dim yellow light aluminates the room slightly, just enough so that I can see his prominent features even better.

“What do you mean?” He asks again now sitting up fully. He has his legs Chris-cross, looking down at me while I still lay on my side.

I sigh trying to gather my thoughts. I purse my lips lying back on my back. I stare at the ceiling for a moment.

“Why do you love me?” I purse my lips. I blink furiously trying to hold back tears.

The way he looks at me is sweet and caring. I sit up just like him. Both of us now sitting across each other, Chris-cross.

Matt and I have been together for a long while, so he knows me. But I never openly talked about it.

“I love you because you’re kind, and caring. I love you because you could talk for hours about things you are passionate about. I love your voice, I love your face, I love the way you’re so delicate with everything. I love the way you touch me. I love you because even when we were just friends you were so kind to me and everyone around. I love you because you’re you.”

By the end of his rant I was crying. Tears streaming down my face while i try to hold in gut wrenching sobs.

Matt’s eyes soften even further. He shifts again so his back is against the head-bored. He grabs me gently and sets me down on his lap facing him.

I cry. Feeling vulnerable I burry my face in the side of his neck. I try not to sob too loud, but I can’t hold it in. With my sobs my body shakes as I try to breathe through it.

“Shh you’re okay baby.” He comforts, gently rubbing circles into my back.

I let out shaky breaths and sobs as I try to calm down. I feel like I’m overreacting. Sure I feel shitty about myself, but then again I can’t do anything to change who I am, so what’s the point in crying about it.

I don’t know for how long I cry, I just know that after a while I couldn’t anymore. I cried so much I ran out of tears.

“You want to talk about it?” Matt asks softly under his breath.

I let out a shaky sigh and shift slightly. I look him in the eyes for a second before letting my head fall forward closing my eyes. I know my eyes are probably red and puffy.

“I just..” I trail off, thinking of a way to describe this to Matt.

“I hate being an immigrant’s daughter..” I say slowly trying to figure out a way to understandably say this without sounding crazy or overly sensitive.

I feel Matt’s hand ghost over my cheek caressing my face gently. He picks up my head slowly so I’m looking at him. My eyes meet his as I try not to cry anymore.

“Talk to me, honey.” He says oh so sweetly.

“I just wish I was American.” I sob. Without even realizing tears were rolling down my face again.

Matt doesn’t say anything waiting for me to continue. He wipes away my tears gently, his eyes full of concern.

“I hate myself and everything I stand for.” I breathe out under my breath as if I’m terrified by that fact. And I am. I hate that I hate myself.

“Baby..” Matt whispers softly. He looks at me like I am everything. He looks at me like I’m the only thing that matters and me saying that I hate myself tears him apart.

“I don’t have a culture. I mean I do, but I’m a third culture kid, I’m not enough for either culture.” I sob. I can physically feel my bottom lip trembling.

“Baby, I love you for you.” Matt says again softly. He wipes away my tears.

“But I hate myself Matt. I hate the fact that I exist.” I breathe out. I close my eyes tightly, because after all, I could barely see anything through my tears anyway.

Matt, being the empath he is, was on the verge of crying too.

No American ever pronounces my name right, but the actual right way just sounds wrong at this point.

I will never find my name on those keychains. And while today, I don’t care about it, back when I was younger and everyone had those, I just couldn’t find one.

“Don’t say that” Matt breaths out. He was still actively wiping away my tears while trying not to cry himself.

“You don’t get it Matt. I’m the problem.” I breathe out harshly. “I feel like I always act like such a brat about it. But my parents had dreams too.” I breathe out.

I see a tear roll down Matt’s cheek and it feels like a slap across my face. I feel my stomach drop. I hurriedly put my hands on his face wiping away the tear while crying myself. Matt’s hands go to my waist holding me.

“Don’t say that.” He breathes out. “You’re allowed to feel things.”

Another wave of sadness washes over me. But before I can break out into sobs again he pulls me into him.

Matt cradles my head into his chest hugging me tightly. I feel safe in his arms. I know Matt loves me for me, but sometimes it still felt like a cruel joke.

Like when I was asked out in middle school as a joke. But we’ve been dating for almost a year now.

“I love your hair, I love your eyes, I love your face, I love your culture, I love your humor. I love you.” Matt assures me. He rubs my scalp gently as I continues to let out small sobs that shake my body.

“I love everything about you. I love you the way you are, and you know that.” He uses his other hand to rub my back comfortingly.

I continue to cry in his arms listening to the sweet nothings and the praises Matt whispers to me.

It hurts knowing I hurt him. And I really want to believe him, and I do. But I don’t agree.

After a while of crying I calm down again.

This is a topic I’ll never be able to talk about without crying. It’s a deep rooted pain.

Being how I am, I hate it.

After a while we move back to a laying down position. “We’ll talk about this later.” Matt assures firmly yet he was still looking at me kindly.

I simply nod. Matt turns the bedside lamp off. He pulls me closer to him. He cradles my head to his chest and I hug him back. I cling to him like my life depends on it.

I know it’s not going to be easy, but it’s exhausting to hate myself this much. I wish I didn’t. I really do.

Masterlist

A/N: All of us third culture kids have probably at some point have experienced some type of internalized racism. I wrote this in a fit of sadness after realising that my dreams are just dreams. I cried so many times while writing this. I hope you guys liked it 💕

‼️please don’t copy my work/idea‼️

Taglist: @muwapsturniolo , @sturnad , @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 , @evie-sturns , @me09love , @fratbrochrisgf , @spideylovin , @chrissgirlsstuff , @stunza , @whicked-hazlatwhore , @sturniooolos , @ecliphttlunar , @orangeypepsi , @klaus223492 , @char112244 , @sst7niolo , @slut4chriss , @mattsturniololoverr , @th3-3d3n-g4rd3n , @st7rnioioss , @t1llysblogs , @nonat-111 , @blahbel668 , @rockstarchr1s , @sturnsintrouble , @nayveetbhh , @tillies33ssss , @sturncakez , @strnilo , @somegirlfromasgard , @mattslovelygf , @sturnsmaeve , @sturnstvr , @lucianastrun , @jnkvivi , @jamiesturniolo

[catboybiologist]

Imma make an observation that literally is just an observation for its own sake, but it's gonna def be borderline toxic and self deprecating. I genuinely only want the observation part about it, and I'm really not being hard on myself or the community here, but if that distinguishment is gonna be hard for you just be warned.

Cool? Cool. Unfocused ramble under the cut.

Now that I've face revealed, I'm kinda curious observing from the sidelines the reactions that people aren't saying. Obvs I'm not a popular enough person to be like "WOAGH SISJDJDJ OMG ITS A FACE REVEAL" but I'm more talking about the general psychology of passing itself now that I show my full face vs when I hid it.

With that tiny scrap of markup covering my nose, chin, and mouth, I had people ENDLESSLY telling me that there's NO WAY I don't pass. OBVIOUSLY whatever I was hiding was the absolute PINNACLE of femininity. My ask box was literally fucking filled with those comments to the point it was obnoxious- "why do you hide your face you're so pretty" or something like it, DMed and anoned to me over. And over. And over again.

I've really only shown my face in "perfect angle" pictures now, and even then it's obvious that I don't pass. Likely, my face looks nothing like what most people imagined. I got this from a lot of people I showed my face to in discord as well- you'd be hard pressed to say that I fully pass now. Best you could do is probably "yeah you look femme but def clocky to the right eye", and I get a lot of "pretty but clocky" type "compliments" from people.

Don't get me wrong, this isn't a "woe is me I'll never pass I'm horrific" post. Now this is Tumblr, and the core group of trans people that I love interacting with largely don't care, or even find the clockiness hot. I'm also gaining confidence in the twinkhon vibes myself, while also knowing that I still have a LONG way to go on HRT, and whatever my face looks like now, it'll be way different in the years and months to come. In the end, passing or not, I don't care. And obviously, that's not a binary thing, blah blah, insert all the passing discourse here. That's not what this post is about.

What it IS about is how far the perception of my face drifted from people's actual assessment of it when I face revealed. When I had the clockiest features of my face hidden, there was an intrinsic assumption that they were more femme than they actually were.

I've also gotten slightly less interaction on my selfies in general (aside from the initial face reveal) but that could just be a byproduct of my reduced activity on Tumblr overall from road tripping. I'll have to see what it's like in the future, but I highly suspect that a large number of lower interaction people now view me as less attractive. I'm not saying they're avoiding me in disgust, I'm saying that when their was a gap in their perception, their brains autofilled a more attractive image than actually existed. This doesn't apply to my core group of moots that are high interaction and comment n stuff (love y'all) but the large scores of people who leave simple tags or reblog and like in passing- I think I just got less attractive in people's minds.

What does all of this say? Honestly it's hard to say. This is more observation than anything else. It might be linked to beauty standards, or just a bias of "unga bunga skinny white woman with conventionally attractive body must have conventionally attractive face" which turned out not to be true, or whatever.

Again, just a weird ramble. Bug summary is that people, on average, assumed I passed before I showed my full face, and now, far less do.

Oh yeah, and inb4 "and omg you actually pass though"- this post isn't for you. There's lots of people who see me and think that I don't, including in Tumblr. Passing varies on a person to person basis, and what I'm saying here is that face revealing flicked a switch in many, but not all, people's brains from passing to non-passing.

[talesfrommedinastation]

How the Bad Batch got white-washed: a script

(Don't know if this is how it actually happened, but it's my personal theory that came out after some wiiiild discussions on Discord. I don't believe this actually happened, but I do think liberties were taken to secure audience members and ratings. Enjoy, my little crumpets!)

CW: Everything. Just...at this point, in between fics and art filled with violence and Naughty Times and Doug's irrational ramblings about Toaster Strudel and SEC football, you should probably leave if you're under 18.

-----

(Be Star Wars animation studio, probably Florida, who knows)

Studio Executive: Yo, animator, we got a problem here.

Animator: Yes?

Studio Executive: These clones, the new guys in this new show, 'The Bad Batch'…they all look alike. All bronzed, good looking guys with dark hair and thick shoulders. 

Animator: Yes, that’s, um, kind of what clones are, sir? They are genetic duplicates of an indigenous actor from New Zealand. 

Studio Executive: That’s the problem.

Animator: Say what?

Studio Executive: Who is watching this damn show? Who is paying for Disney + subscriptions? Who is our main money-making audience here?

Animator: Um, I guess…families? And, uh, lonely single adults?

Studio Executive: EXACTLY. And you know what is declining, besides civility in an ever-crumbling society? 

Animator: What?

Studio Executive: THE BIRTH RATE.

Animator: Uh, actually--

Studio Executive: YOU KNOW IT, I KNOW IT, THE WORLD KNOWS IT. DAMN GREAT RECESSION AND PANDEMIC AND CRUSHING REALITY GETTING MILLENIALS ALL (legitimately) SCARED OF HAVING BABIES. WE NEED MIDDLE CLASS PEOPLE TO START BREEDING LIKE RABBITS IF WE WANT TO HAVE A STEADY POPULATION OF AUDIENCE CONSUMERS OF DISNEY PRODUCTS.

Animator: Well, that seems aggressively eugenics-oriented, with a tinge of classism.

Studio Executive: WHATEVER I MAKE THE BIG BUCKS SHUT YOUR ART SCHOOL MOUTH. Now, redesign those new clones!

Animator: To…what?

Studio Executive: First of all, the tech guy! What’s his name?

Animator: ….Tech. 

Studio Executive: WELL THAT SHIT’S EASY TO MARKET. Anywho, get rid of the tan and the muscles and the thick dark hair. No nerd looks like that, come on. Make him a skinny white guy with receding hair, slap some hipster glasses on him too. Actually, you know what? Meander your ass over to the accounting department on the second floor and draw a few of the weirdos conducting audits in there. Base the tech guy off of them, not a buff, golden, Maori man.

Animator: But the guys in accounting look NOTHING like Temuera Morrison! This is just wrong!

(pictured above: Not the average CPA in the USA. That rhymed)

Studio Executive: Bro, get real. Are these lonely single ladies and the exhausted moms watching this show with their kids going to run into Mr. Morrison while working their office job? You think Boba Fett’s tanned self sits at the corner cubicle and tries to hit on them when they go to the copier? What are you smoking?! And on that note, make that tech character sassy, smart, and nurturing! Make him the perfect guy!

Animator: Why? I am so confused.

("Wanna come look at some Excel spreadsheets with me, baby?")

Studio Executive: Because we want all the 30-something ladies watching this show to get so hot and bothered over Tech that they decide they need to have this clown’s babies, like, now! And they’ll run over to the accounting office, drunkenly hook up with one of the auditors in a broom closet after Thirsty Thursday, and boom! Another consumer born, 9 months later!

Animator: This is sounding astonishingly like eugenics.

Studio Executive: WHATEVER. Same goes for the other clones! Make that tall bald one look like the aggressively outgoing construction worker that’s laying cement outside of the accounting office! The one that always wolf-whistles and screams ‘Jesteś piękna! Beautiful like model!’ at every woman! The one that all the ladies in the office watch and go ‘Oh, yes, take that shirt off, it’s a hot day today, daddy’. Watching that fun guy on this show means those ladies with THROW THEMSELVES at guys like this! And bam! MORE CONSUMERS FOR DISNEY BORN. 

(Wrecker has raw contractor energy. ::lays pipe::)

Animator: I am not enjoying this conversation’s direction.

Studio Executive: CAN IT AND TAKE IT UP WITH HR. Now the leader, I know we’re going with Rambo, and I’m okay with it, but give him a little extra smolder and snatch that waist a bit. I want to go for a ‘hot waiter at Cooper’s Hawk that slips you his number after you tip him 40%’, vibe. 30-something ladies love Cooper’s Hawk, there’s been market research, do it. 

(He'll judge your love of pinot grigio, but not how you pay him, wink wink)

Animator: No.

Studio Executive: SHUT UP AND DO YOUR JOB. Now, the last two…bald, calm guy that always seems tired but is still constantly there for you? Basically, every exhausted Millennial man right now? Make him extra pale because he hasn’t left his condo since 2020 and his only social outlet is playing STEAM games with his other lonely friends. Perfect. Job well done. 

(He uses his scomp to play 'Dave the Diver'. You know he does)

Animator: Yeah, his name is Echo and he– 

Studio Executive: Good, make him like I said, and trust me, ladies will see men like him and want to fix them, and then promptly ride said men like it’s Derby Day. More consumers born, we will have a bumper crop of tickets purchased at Disneyworld and Galaxy's Edge within the next couple of years. Excellent. 

Animator: Sir, you are a sick, sick man. 

Studio Executive: Speaking of which, the last guy. Just make him Clint Eastwood. 

Animator:…Clint Eastwood. Isn’t he old as hell?

(Oh, Daddy Warcrimes, you and your toothpick are the Internet's Everything)

Studio Executive: Yeah, but, daddy issues abound amongst many of our consumer audience. And this is a show about daddy issues. And hopefully, by watching this, we will turn more people in daddies and KEEP OUR CONSUMER NUMBERS UP ON DISNEY +! 

Wait, where are you going?!

Animator: I’m resigning and joining the Peace Corps, I can’t do this anymore.

[inkburnt]

Madge headcanon #1

PROFILE

Madge Rafferty is a witch whose craft leans toward the practical rather than the abstract side of magic, though she practices elemental magic as well. She is something of a rival to V, though her antagonistic first impressions belie all that there is to her.

APPEARANCE. She stands at 5'7", about average height for a woman of strong Irish stock. Her complexion is healthier than V's, even Vera's: she's not pale. Her face is between triangular and oval in shape, with her features such as eyebrows, nose, cheekbones being more rounded than angular—average, in other words, like the shape and size of her lips. Her nose and eyebrows, however, are thin, and her eyes are gray; alert, sharp, and intelligent. A natural redhead, with straight auburn hair that reaches the bottom of her shoulder blades but is often kept tied in a ponytail. She bears no scars, blemishes, or noticeable birthmarks. Her build is again average, mesomorphic, so her body is in the shape of an hourglass; however, she is neither voluptuous nor skinny, but also of average weight and shape. She dresses casually, not particularly feminine nor particularly masculine, though her signature color is garnet and she likes to wear shades of red in combination with shades of brown. White, creams & tans, and black are also on the table.

CHARACTER. While Margaret is her full first name, she actually hates it. "Madge" is her preferred nickname and virtually the only name anyone is allowed to call her. Maggie and Maggs/Mags are other diminutives she isn't entirely fond of, either, but she could warm up to those given her relationship to the person using said names. The name Margaret is of Persian origin and generally means "child of light."

She's a solid Irishwoman, and that goes all the way from her roots to her behavior. She can be very curious, irreverent, blunt, witty, and verbally combative if she's in a pressing situation or with someone she doesn't much like. However, she can also behave this way around complete strangers, although it's largely situational and she's usually smarter than that anyway. In truth, she's a highly intelligent and even intellectual woman, however her emotions are not as educated. She is a Scorpio, a water sign on the opposite end of the spectrum to V's Pisces—similar and dissimilar, as they both harbor distrust in others and prefer keeping to themselves. They don't care to make friends, they are introverted, don't speak up first; observant and cautious, over-thinking, realists to pessimists. They are even the exact same age (in The Witching Hour, that is thirty-one). However, where V is shy and naive, Madge is fiery and wiser. At times, she doesn't think (but that can also be said of V) and often regrets it when it's a little too late. Suffice to say, both sorcerers are emotionally unintelligent, repressed and immature to some degree.

Madge's personality does branch off with differences of her own, of course. She has a tendency to act impulsively and is often judgmental, drawing conclusions before the full picture is laid before her. She can be intense in many areas. She has no fear of speaking out, but only does so when her emotions are riled (and it doesn't take much to get them there); and when it comes to that, she will swear and slander until she's out of things to say. She doesn't have a sailor's mouth, but you will hear profanity slipping into casual conversation with her. Though she may be given to temperamental flare ups, she is far from an idiot. Credit for that is not only due to her having graduated from the University of Oxford (she's spent much time in England), but to thorough research and simple life experience. She is rightly aware of her intelligence, and her confidence stems from what she knows she can do. Recognizing her limits, however, is a different story: often harder to do, and she's reluctant to admit where she falls short.

Because of the way her adolescence has gone, she's a bit prickly toward men, and she seems to assume a sense of rivalry where there really isn't any. She also harbors issues with rejection that he likes to keep under as tight a lid as possible. Her feelings and perceptions are usually one-sided, and once she sees this for herself, she'll cool off. If she feels wronged, however, she will pursue her need for justice to the fullest. You can imagine what this might entail for V—and, indeed, even Vera.

SKILLS & ABILITIES. Madge is largely self-taught (started studying under her mother and Vera's coven), taking to a sorcery different from V's in some key areas. Both enchant objects and craft charms, perform rites, create their own spells, wards and incantations, and share other techniques and follow certain standards at the core of what they do. Like V, Madge has branched away to forge her own sorcerous path. She has leaned toward the more practical aspects of sorcery, which puts an emphasis on materials and the physical body. For example: she's created an incredible healing salve made up of only herbs and extracts activated by incantation; she's learned how to put together enchanted salts combined with other ingredients for a "tracking powder," to name just a couple. Practical applications such as these, and others, rest at the heart of her magic. In this way, hers is the "practical" while V's is the "abstract" (because he relies more on the intangible and psychical), and this is the clearest example of how they contrast each other.

Further, she's more or less mastered how to perform elemental magic, but she does so with a unique spin on it. She actually draws on her own body's elements to produce a corresponding elemental discharge. For example: her breath for a gust of wind, her body's electrical current for some sparks, the heat inside for a spit of flame, her body's water content for a spray or steam. Even in this way, her magic does not reach beyond herself but is still very much of her and within her, contained, and on a small, grounded scale. But she makes use of incantation as well, and has plenty of those (which are typically one word, in Irish Gaelic) up her sleeve. Again, contrasting V in large part.

She's not clairvoyant or spiritually sensitive like he is, bearing none of those gifts. She's also a pure-blooded human, which also means she has no hidden talents, quirks or traits to fall back on like V has. She also has limited to no prior experience with demons; she doesn't even know "devil hunting" is out there. The two sorcerers are surely opposite in many ways, but they are as similar as they are dissimilar. In one sorcerous area they are alike is partnering with familiars. While V has three, Madge has one, and it is in one of the most vicious, relentless, indomitable beasts of the underworld: a Fury. A stunning fact, considering a woman of limited experience with demons was able to tame and befriend such a demon. But like any good familiar, her Fury is loyal to the end and as good as a best friend to her. In fact, she's affectionately named her Carmen, inspired by the opera she went to see during university (but the name is also evocative of the color carmine, because Furies are red).

On a more "normie" level, Madge has taken self-defense classes during high school, so she is, by herself, no pushover and isn't afraid to prove it. She's also a certified linguist, specializing in onomastics, the study of proper, personal names. However, being that she needs food to eat and has bills to pay, she's settled with a teaching job in English.

[modern-inheritance]

Heyy! Do you have any ideas for the cast of Eragon's new series?? Btw I loveee your posts

Hey Anon! Sorry it took me so long to answer this, but I wanted to give you a better answer...and I have failed. Thank you for the love though!

I don't know many actors/actresses by name. And none that I know of (besides Jeremy Irons) would fit any of the characters. But I CAN give you a ramble on what I'd like to see!

Eragon: Get those high cheekboned, cleft chinned, twink lookin' pretty boys out of here. Eragon in book one is not pretty. He is not headshot worthy. He is a 15 year old farm boy, doing physical labor, rarely bathing, hunting in the wild, and not caring about his appearance beyond the average. He's got thick, dark eyebrows. Dark hair. Apart from that, we have little to no description of how Eragon looks, beyond the mention in Brisingr that his hair curls at his temples slightly. But he is not pretty.

I want an average, slightly rugged, farm boy teenager. Not some model.

Brom: Jeremy. Fucking. Irons.

Arya: Not white and not a redhead. Elves are played as asian based. I don't want a skinny armed woman either, Arya's noticeably muscled in the books. Black hair, green eyes if possible. No wimps. Must be able to do the stunts or at least look like she can.

Honestly though? If she weren't older (I haven't seen a recent picture of her for a long time so I'm not sure about it), I'd tap Michelle Rodriguez. I love that woman. She's got the tough looks, attitude, and abilities needed to give Arya the presence she needs. But I'm looking through MIC tinted glasses. For canon Arya, we still need someone with a presence, a woman who puts of a 'don't fuck with me' vibe but can also sometimes dip her head in respect to politics (I said sometimes, but I'm gonna get shit for this I know it), quiet but sharp, and looks and acts like she can hold her own. If they're going to be more centered toward an adult audience (which apparently they are!), let's not sexualize her. But the history of torture, PTSD, etc can def be delved into and someone who can portray that respectfully would be fantastic.

Murtagh: Again, get rid of those pretty boys. Yes, Murtagh grew up with a more pampered life, but just...I don't want these model types. It's an issue when I've seen every single fan cast putting these models on there and come on. This is a medieval fantasy thing. Paolini at least tries to show some more realistic aspects of life and war. Models are not included.

Someone that can show both Murtagh's darker side AND his overarching vulnerability and pain. Murtagh is a hurt individual that keeps having everything taken from him or used to hurt him. He's complicated, especially in the later books. We need someone who can show that.

Nasuada: Please keep her natural hair. I've got a friend who read the books with me who was so happy to see a black woman with her natural hair in a fantasy book because she never had seen someone with hair just like hers in fantasy before. We need someone who can slump down in private, the weight of an entire war and country on her shoulders, but draw herself up and show willpower, regality, dignity. Someone who can use subtlety when doing the politics bits.

Angela: Something that I and others I've talked to about Angela always forget is that Angela looks no older than Nasuada, who is about 18 at the time of the books. Wild energy. Wild, curly hair. Not afraid to hold a live frog/toad for a scene.

Galbatorix: For the love of whatever the hell is holy, not John Malcovich. I get that we didn't know what he looked like at the time, but what the hell was that?!

Durza: Scrawny lean ass pale dude and can we move away from the scary fingernails and yellow teeth bit? The pointy teeth thing, fine, that's canon, prosthetic teeth are a thing. Otherwise I just want someone who just oozes lithe, cocky, oily, psycopath. Bared tooth, smirking, twisted grin type.

Uuuuuuh....who else? Roran can't be a model either, and he's more beefy than Eragon even in the first book. Someone who can grow a damn fine beard.

I'm probably forgetting a ton of mains but I am currently very hungry and my roomie is making me lunch so I must go stare at her like an unfed dog. Feel free to reblog with questions or send another ask for particulars, but again I won't have specific actors/actresses. If you know an actor/actress that fits any of my descriptions/wants then please mention them in a reblog or DM or ask! I'd love to see!

[professionallydeadinside]

"Ness" (they/them) is Sumerian (not Middle Eastern, they're adamant about that) and has hazel eyes that almost look yellow, are super tall (6'9") and usually wears their bright green dreaded hair under a bandana. Some visitors swear they've seen "Ness"'s hair move on its own. They tend to wear a mask over they're face and have a deep voice, which surprises anyone but the other employees.

"Loch" (he/him) is also pretty tall (6'7" and "Ness" makes fun of him for being "short") and has brown hair that matches a full but short beard. He's black, but mentions her French background a bit. He's got brown eyes, and speaks with a Northwest accent. He can speak French and tends to mutter profanities to himself in it. He's super shy and tends to make the donuts in the back. Refuses pictures that aren't taken by the other employees.

"Stinky" (she/it) is the manager, and she's a little 5'0" woman with red hair, brown eyes, light tan skin, and the thickest Scottish accent you've ever heard. Like, you'd be lucky to understand it on a good day thick. She's a bit in the heavier side, but you can tell she's got muscle too, which it's used before to deck someone as well as pick up it's employees like little kittens if they get too rowdy. She's got wicked sharp teeth and her hands seem almost webbed, which she says is a birth defect.

"Jersey" (ze/zhem) is the Lankiest Motherfucker Alive. Ze are also The Whitest Person. Ze are super skinny, mostly assumed to be because of zeir metabolism, and are always hungry. Ze have black eyes, blonde hair, and zeir fingernails are always filed(??) to a point. Ze joke about being "so hungry ze could eat a man" which makes the others laugh, almost sinisterly. Which is weird since someone has gone missing around there before, and soon after, the store was briefly selling meat pies. Odd...

And finally, the assistant manager, "Martian" (he/xem). He is albino, with bright red eyes that seem to glow, pale skin, and white hair that xey dye half black. Xey are average in height at 5'9", and tends to wear black clothing with wing motifs on them. He has a southern accent and chuckles to himself a lot whenever people talk about Mothman, which leads to people finding out that xey used to live in Point Pleasant. He seems to know when anything bad is about to happen, and "Stinky" jokingly calls xem the shop's "bad luck detector".

-Kirk anon

JERSEY I LOVE ZHEMMMMM I LOVE ALL OF THEM,,,,,,

[the-talented-tink]

About Tink

Archetype — The Joker

Birthday — July 30th, 1997

Zodiac Sign — Leo

MBTI — ESFP-T

Enneagram — Type 4

Temperament — Sanguine

Hogwarts House — Gryffindor Primary, Slytherin Secondary

Moral Alignment — chaotic neutral

Primary Vice — Vain and Stubborn

Primary Virtue — Brave

Element — Fire

Overview:

Mother — 

Father — 

Mother’s Occupation — Tinker

Father’s Occupation — Tinker

Family Finances — average

Birth Order — Oldest

Brothers —  None

Sisters — Sister Peri

Other Close Family — none

Best Friend — none

Other Friends — Karen, Simba, other Swynlakers

Enemies — tbd

Pets — none yet

Home Life During Childhood — It was a pretty nice home life in the Hollow. She lived pretty cozy

Town or City Name(s) — Swynlake

What Did His or Her Bedroom Look Like — Her room was full of chaotic creations and pictures of different talents.

Any Sports or Clubs — none

Favorite Toy or Game — Mouse Polo and Capture the Gooseberry

Schooling — she didn’t do that well

Favorite Subject — Breaks

Popular or Loner — Somewhere in the middle

Important Experiences or Events — figuring out her talent, trying pride uni, creating Pixie’s and leaving for the U.S.

Nationality — British

Culture — Fairy culture of Pixie Hollow

Religion and beliefs — Atheist

Physical Appearance

Face Claim —  Florence Pugh

Complexion — white

Hair Colour — blonde

Eye Colour — green

Height — 5’4”

Build — skinny

Tattoos — plenty, will describe in a post later

Piercings — several, nose and ears

Common Hairstyle — in an updo or down mostly

Clothing Style — depends on what she’s doing. Comfort or cute clothes or party clothes

Mannerisms — still working that out rn.

Usual Expression — a smug little grin

Health

Overall (do they get sick easily)? —  not typically

Physical Ailments — none currently

Neurological Conditions — none she would acknowledge

Allergies —  none

Grooming Habits — she keeps herself pretty clean, often lazy to shave though

Sleeping Habits — will sleep like the dead, goes to bed late

Eating Habits — loves food but forgets to eat sometimes

Exercise Habits —  when she has to

Emotional Stability — relatively unstable

Body Temperature — normal

Sociability — very social

Addictions — to energy drinks mainly but tbd

Drug Use — occasional

Alcohol Use — pretty regular

Your Character’s Character: 

Bad Habits — so many things. Being late to things, arguing with people she doesn’t agree with

Good Habits — she keeps in touch with people, reaches out first to schedule hang outs

Best Characteristic — Independent

Worst Characteristic — Vain and a Jealous streak a mile wide

Worst Memory — failing her attempts at different apprenticeships, and now also her recent break up

Best Memory — creating Pixie’s and seeing how it’s grown

Proud of — Pixie’s

Embarrassed by — her own history

Driving Style — no one allow this woman to drive

Strong Points — Confident and capable

Temperament — Choleric

Attitude — Cocky

Weakness — Overconfidence

Fears — Failure

Phobias — afraid of being tied down

Secrets — it’s actually her fault she got dumped because she lost her cool

Regrets — not having more to show for her life so far

Feels Vulnerable When — she can’t put up a front about things, when someone sees her for who she really is

Pet Peeves — people slurping loudly. blegh.

Conflicts — Anti-Magicks, herself half the time

Motivation — to be more successful than she is now

Short Term Goals and Hopes — to get her act together and improve her situation

Long Term Goals and Hopes — to become a true success and the envy of others lol

Sexuality — bi bi bi

Exercise Routine  — what? No 

Day or Night Person — Night person

Introvert or Extrovert — Extrovert

Optimist or Pessimist — Pessimist possibly 

Greatest Want — to be seen as as talented as she thinks she is

Greatest Need — to figure out where her place is

[hypercortical]

I'm really frustrated by narratives around OnlyFans related to income. Lately it's been really popular to among anti-sex work people to use statistics about OF income to dissuade people from seeing it as a viable form of work, and instead painting it as something that obviously won't be worth it. The statistics usually say something like "the average OF creator earns 150 dollars per month". which, yeah that's chump change. But for some reason everyone ignores the fact that this number doesn't account for the fact that many if not most OF accounts are probably idle, or posting infrequently because the user isn't treating it like a full time job. I want to know the average income of OF users who commit 20 or 40 or however many hours per week to their OF. I'd imagine an average looking woman below the age of 30 could easily get to top 1-2% on OF if they commit 20 or so hours per week. For example, right now I'm looking at discussion between OF creators on reddit. One person says she works about 2 hours per day on OF as a side hustle alongside her primary job. So like 10-14 hours per week depending on whether she does it weekends or not. And at the time of posting, she was a top ~6% creator. And I checked out some of her social media posts. This is someone who doesn't even post her face. She has a below average breast size, and she's skinny. Not particularly curvy in other ways either. Another user right below her said she's top 6% with 30-45 minutes of work per day. And it's hard to get clear numbers, but it looks like most sources corroborate that top 10% corresponds to about 1000 dollars per month. maybe top 6% are making 1500-2000 dollars per month. That's at least an extra 15k per year for a side hustle that takes like an extra hour each day. Sounds pretty worth it to me. Looking at some recent posts on the same subreddit r/OnlyFansAdvice, I can see that someone who is currently top 4% claims to currently be making $2500 per month, and she also does not show her face. (keeping in mind that % is ranked by income. Anyone better than top 4% is making more money than that). She doesn't say how many hours she works, but she said she posts one picture per day. One "full video" per week. And posts 3-10s gifs cut from her video into "20+" subreddits. each day. to me that sounds like at least 1-1.5 hours each day, plus however long it takes her to do a video, which I can't really guess at because I don't know how long or how quality her videos are. Scratch that, it looks like she does ~7min partnered videos. Static camera or male pov camera. No intentional lighting work, minimal editing. So that's gonna be at least 10-15 minutes of work. I can't say how much preparation is involved in the performers getting themselves presentable and in the zone, but I'd imagine no more than an hour. And then I can't imagine this minimal editing take more than 10 minutes. plus some time needs to be spent cutting it up into nice gifs, which i'm guessing can take up to an hour if a lot of thought is given, and lots of gif variants are selected. So that's like 10-13 hours per week, or 1.4-1.8 hours per day for a 30k gross yearly income. Now, she probably takes only a majority split with the guy. Maybe 70-30. so like 21k gross. And that's in addition to whatever her primary job is. I assume she has one because otherwise she just has tons of free time on her hands, and not the most livable income. So i'd say that's a pretty damn good side hustle. And that's for someone who doesn't show her face, has pretty average looking breast size. Not exactly skinny, but probably not overweight either (in terms of BMI). white. probably 25-35 (hard to tell when I can't see her face). And she probably doesn't spend any money on equipment. Maybe a little money for a rig or tripod to hold her phone. But certainly no lighting equipment, sound equipment, or cameras. (some fairly cheap lighting solutions could really boost the quality of her videos.)

I don't have any experience in porn, but I do have a bit of in videography/editing/filmmaking thanks to my dad (a director of photography), and some film classes I took, and sometimes seeing the quality of independent porn really makes me wanna give it a try just to see if I can do better from a video production perspective. And I also wonder just how much better video production lends to success. Like can someone who's a 6 make as much money as an 8 just by making the same amount of content, but with more professional video quality? I personally think some of the best visual erotic content i've ever seen came from non-porn films with erotic scenes, where the eroticism was given a very cinematic treatment. But for some reason I never see that in porn.

[what-if-nct]

Alright so- I just realised that I get grossed out when I see vag*nas when I’m trying to find guy porn and sometimes I don’t want to (but not grossed out) to see p*nudes when I want to look up some upsk*rt pics. However, not only that but I’m very picky with the pictures I wanted.

Firstly, it cannot be a blonde woman. I don’t know why I don’t like that hair colour so much (especially on white people) and I’ve been having that ever since I was very young. I hated the fact that a barbie doll was this perfectly pale hourglass blonde and not a brunette with slightly smaller body portions instead.

Secondly, I don’t like thick or bigger body sizes — huge turn offs for me. Not to say that they aren’t gorgeous in their own ways, but when I’m in this state of literally needing to burst a nut, I would prefer someone slim or an average size. I feel like K-pop did change my standards a bit, but of course they don’t need to look exactly like them to be my type. (Also they can have leg hair, but not too much)

Thirdly, the professional/amateur photoshoots involving upsk*rts (even that reddit page too) doesn’t feel authentic and it kinda takes away the magic that in the fet*sh. I usually prefer those videos where it’s something like “peeking under my partner’s skirt” but minus the talking, sex, and basically turn it into a voyeur show. Plus, I found that watching real couples are much more enjoyable than amateur actors since their orgasms tend to be much more real and unfiltered. However, it is a little bit risky since you could bump into someone’s revenge porn or leaked nudes. But overall yeah…

Also I love watching some gay porn and upskirt pics. That’s all I ever do over on those sites.

I think everyone is pretty picky with what they want watch, but the pickiness makes it really really hard to find exactly what you like to watch. I think wanting realism is a common want cause porn is a production and is staged and it lacks actual feeling, which I think finding a couple or anyone who you know it's 100% of their own hands and mind and it's something they want to do is best cause I can't say the same for the manufactured kind, it's quite soulless in more ways then one. I personally if I do want to watch it it has to resemble my real life as much as possible so I go for bigger women, black women, and then with skinny little white men. So for me it's easy to find things but I rarely do cause in my imagination it's Me and Johnny, Jungwoo, Hyunjin, Yuta, Bangchan.....all five....I don't know if I just have really good imagination but I can easily feel what I'm imagining. is that weird?

[ashermiss]

I think what's been getting to me about all the barbie discourse is that people are being very disingenuous about criticism. I have not seen anyone posit that Barbie is the sole cause of our society's messed up beauty standards. When people critique Barbie, that is not the claim they are making. The fact that Barbie reinforces those beauty standards is still well worth talking about.

Likewise, when people critique the capitalist aspects of Barbie, they are not positing that the toy brand is necessarily worse than any other capitalist enterprise. But Mattel being an enormous corporation solely motivated by profit is still worth discussing, especially if you want to untangle the effects that has on the doll and the movie

"I think it's a little silly to act like Barbie is the CAUSE of this rather than just being a product of the society we live in." <- I have not seen anyone make the claim that Barbie is "the cause" of any societal ill. The vast majority of critique I've seen has been a sincere effort to have meaningful conversations about the complex ways that Barbie fits into society. Saying that Barbie is "a reflection" of society ironically makes the case for MORE critique, not less. If Barbie is a reflection of society, then we can learn a lot about social norms and ills by discussing Barbie!

Ultimately, I find these dismissals very frustrating, because they come across as attempts to limit discussion. The old adage is still true - you can criticize something and still enjoy it. The trend I'm seeing around tumblr is that anyone critiquing Barbie is either 1. being way too serious about something "fun" or 2. is being somehow anti-feminist. I reject both of those views.

For better or worse, Barbie is a cultural behemoth. Even if the brand were perfect (which, to be clear, it is not) it would still spark complex discussions about it's role in feminism, body positivity, capitalism, and all the rest. And those discussions are worthwhile.

Also, an aside - I find the original tweet to be a bit cruel, if I'm being honest. "This toy, which is so popular that it's influence was inescapable, made me feel really shitty about my own body" should not be met with "well it didn't make me feel that way because I just didn't let it!" Not only is that extremely dismissive, it misses the bigger point, which is that girls who did not fit into societal beauty standards often had their insecurities reinforced by their Barbie dolls.

(Also, I don't mean to stir up shit here, but none of the Barbie dolls pictured are anything approaching "not skinny". The "curvy" model is still skinnier than the average American woman. At best that is "kim kardashian" level skinny instead of "taylor swift" level skinny. And, despite the increased prevalence of non-white dolls, the Barbies sold in stores are still overwhelmingly white. This is an example of a good faith criticism that does not indicate a hatred of all things Barbie :3)

[harrywritingsbyme]

So I’m a dark skin girl and I always wonder is Harry gets involved with women that are not white skinny tall blonde model like all his exes. Can u write something about that? Maybe they are friends but reader is into him but keeps us to herself cause she is sure he only date the same type of girls.

Feelings

A/N: I really needed and wanted to write this one. I feel like us chocolate girlies can be a bit left out some times, and it sucks. So I want to do/write more things that are specifically tailored to us black girls because we need to see and read more of it. Also, I don’t want this to be a thing where it’s putting anyone down or being melodramatic towards things that are at the end of the day out of our control. But this is just the way that some people (including myself at times) feel, and everyone should be aware of this. I did made sure that there is something in here that everyone can relate to in some way. So I hope you guys enjoy🙃 

4.5k Words

You rarely opened up. Most of your relationships were surface level, and you never fully expressed yourself the way that one would normally. For the longest time, even since you were a child, you never fully opened up to anyone. You would just go about your normal routine as if everything were fine, and bottle up everything you were feeling. Even when you were going through some of the worst times of your life, you still managed to keep face and put on a display of being okay, even though you were on the verge of dying inside. Still, you were able to get through most of your life like this and you were fine with things being the way they were. That is, until a certain someone fell into your life. 

When you first met Harry, it was like a breath of fresh air. Even though you still had your wall up and didn’t feel the urge to fully express yourself, you still felt like you could come to him with everything if you wanted to. He was just like the other people you’d met in the past who were nice and willing to get close to you. But at the same time, he still managed to be different than anyone you’d met in the past. You felt a sense of closeness to him that you couldn’t readily explain and that was unlike anyone you’d met before. He made you want to express yourself and release all of the emotions you had pent up inside of you for what felt like forever. It was like he was the person that you needed in your life who could draw out these things out of you. And after a period of time, he was in fact able to do this. 

At first, you were beyond anxious to be open and honest to someone about your feelings. But over time, the wall you’d built began to come down and you just allowed yourself to be vulnerable with Harry. And he was able to do the same. You both were able to lower your guards around each other and actually be free. The two of you were able to create a strong and solid friendship that would span across almost 3 years. Whenever something happened in each others lives, you both were each others first call. It was a friendship that neither of you wanted to take for granted. And you both, especially you, made sure to appreciate every moment and each other. 

Your appreciation for Harry went a bit deeper though.  

 You guys’ overall dynamic in the past year hadn’t changed at all. You two still did just about everything together and had a great time in each others company. It was your personal flow that had undergone a drastic change. You began to develop feelings that had gone far beyond the boundary of being platonic. They’d grown to be something beyond the scope of a simple camaraderie. You started to develop romantic feelings for your best friend. It wasn’t uncommon for this to happen, it was normal for someone to develop these feelings towards a person they spent a lot of time with and are close to. It was just that the success rate for transitioning out of a loving, close, and healthy friendship to a loving, romantic, and healthy relationship was slim to none. And for you and particular, you felt like your chances were in the negatives. 

It’s already a rough thing to deal with when you find out that the person you have feelings for doesn’t feel the same way towards you. But these pangs of rejection are on a completely different level when you realize that you’re not even their type. Now you didn’t know for a fact what Harry’s “type” was. You’d asked him on separate occasions and his answer was always the same. He’d simply tell you that “if somethings there, then it’s worth a shot”. And you’d always respond with a “that makes sense”, deciding to not go there all together. Even though he said that he didn’t have a type, you knew that in his subconscious, he did in fact have one. There were things about you that didn’t at all align with his exes as a whole. If you had to be blunt, you weren’t skinny, tall, blonde, and white. You were a thick, average in height, dark haired, dark skinned, black woman. The differences between the two were uncanny and that was perfectly fine. You welcomed and celebrated everyones differences. And so did Harry; when it wasn’t his love life.

He just didn’t venture out into other things when it came to his love and personal life. You could honestly say that this was true because you watched it all from the sidelines. You were a bystander and sounding board to Harry during his most recent relationship, and just in general. You recognized the pattern in the women he’d choose to pursue. You’ve even seen in the magazines and on the internet, the people he’d been involved with in the past. And they all were extremely similar. 

Seeing all of this made you think that something was wrong with you. What made them so special? You just wanted him to look at you the same way he looked at them. Developing all of these newfound feelings caused you to begin to slip back into your old ways. You began holding in and internalizing everything when it came to this. You’d put on a brave face and act as if everything was okay. You were putting all of your energy into making Harry believe that you were fine. And you successfully did that. He had no clue as to what and how you were feeling, and you wanted to keep it that way. The last thing you wanted to do was lose the person who not only you cared deeply about, but the person who cared deeply about you. You couldn’t lose your best friend.

This endless cycle went on for months. You kept these feelings to yourself and you just kept things going. You hated doing this, but it was what you thought was the best for you. You hated the thought of losing Harry over this. But at the end of the day, you could only take but so much. You could relate this entire thing to a sponge. It takes in all the water it possibly can and eventually, little drops will begin to spill out when it’s reached its maximum capacity for water. You were the sponge. You had been internalizing or harboring all of these feelings for such a long period of time that eventually you were going to reach your tipping point. It was going to get to a place where you’d have to release all of it and tell Harry how you truly felt. And you really wanted to do that. In the past, talking about your feelings was something that you tried, and eventually swore you’d never do. You even tried therapy, but it just wouldn’t work for you. But with Harry, you wanted to talk to him and tell him how you felt. So keeping this inside for so long after not holding it all in for a little over two years was a definite struggle. 

In all of this though, you had no idea that the struggle you faced in holding everything inside was nowhere near the level of struggle you faced when you finally let it all out. 

The end of the week had finally came which meant that it was you and Harry’s night to hang out and talk about you guys’ week…even though you two talked just about everyday. This just gave you two an excuse to hang out. After you two made and ate dinner, you two decided to head outside and sit by the pool to enjoy Harry’s view and watch the sunset. The conversation between the two of you seamlessly bounced from subject to subject, and it managed to bounce all the way to relationships. 

“Any hot dates comin’ up?” Harry asks beside you, taking another swig from his glass of wine.

  “No. None that I know of at least. You?” You reply, redirecting the question back to him. 

“Me neither, but I have been talking to someone for the past couple of days.” Harry replies. 

“And you haven’t told me this?! As your best friend, I feel offended.” You joke with him, sitting up from the chair to get a better look at him. 

“Don’t be offended, you’ll always be my number one.” Harry coos with a laugh. “It’s nothing major or serious I guess.” He continues. 

“Got a picture?” You ask. Asking him this was a big mistake. 

“I think so.” Harry replies, pulling his phone out of his pocket. After a few seconds, he hands the phone over to you and there it was. A girl who looked exactly like everyone else he’s dated.

“Oh, she looks just like everyone else you’ve dated.” You hum amusedly, handing the phone back to him. Under normal circumstances, you wouldn’t have said that. But you had a pretty good buzz going from the drinks Harry made, and the glass of wine you were currently working with. So your lips were a little bit looser than normal. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Harry asks with a very confused tone.

“No offense, but she looks like most of your exes.” You repeat, thinking back to the picture Harry just showed you.

“No she does not.” Harry says adamantly, brushing off your comment. 

“It’s okay Harry, we all know that you have a type.” You softly laugh. You were only teasing him...right?

“I do not have a type Y/n! Where is this coming from?” You could hear in his voice that he was genuinely confused. 

“This is coming from your best friend who’s seen you in a relationship with someone who not only looks like the girl you just showed me, but also girls before her.” You explain. 

“Well tell me these similarities because I’m still not following.” 

“Tall, skinny, blonde, and-“ You didn’t even think about the last and final one before saying it. “white.” You finish, listing off every last similarity. 

 “No they’re no-“ Harry couldn’t even finish his own sentence. He realized that it was in fact true. He didn’t know why he’d never seen the pattern before. He also couldn’t wrap his head around why you were so up and arms about it. When he looked at you, he could tell that you weren’t feeling the best about this conversation. He didn’t know if it was the alcohol or him just being really bad at comprehension. He just wanted to make sense of it all and where it was coming from. 

“Can you honestly say that I, or anyone that looks like me for that matter would have an equal shot at being with you?”

There it was. The crazy thing about it all was that the question you just asked him, wasn’t even the bulk of what you really wanted to tell him. You weren’t even expecting to talk to him about this at all. You thought that you’d have a little bit more time to collect your thoughts, but all of this came completely out of left field. 

Asking Harry that question, along with the entire conversation in general was like stabbing yourself in the heart. It wasn’t even a full conversation and you were already dying inside. Every second of silence from Harry that went by was like a twist to the knife that was already buried inside you. You wanted to blame Harry for the horrible way you were feeling, but you couldn’t. You wanted to blame yourself for even bringing it up, but you couldn’t do that either. All you could do was sit there and try your best to muster up the tiniest bit of strength to pick yourself up and leave. Your body felt extremely heavy and you just wanted to get out of there.

Without uttering a single word to Harry, you finally pick yourself up and you walk away from him and the entire situation. Harry was still trying to wrap his head around the idea that he did in fact have a type, but seeing you walk away from him like that crushed him. He felt like you were not only walking away from him, you were also walking out of his life. He felt absolutely crushed and completely helpless. He was all alone. He had so many thoughts and feelings running around in his head that he couldn’t even chase after you to help him figure them out. And by the time he would finally build up the strength and courage to go after you, you would’ve already been gone. 

When you walked back into the house, you didn’t waste any time gathering your belongings that you’d brought with you before leaving out the front door. Since you were drinking, you decided to just call an Uber and just come back to get your car in the morning. For the next 5 minuets, you just stood outside Harry’s home. Staring blankly at whatever was around, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill from your eyes, and trying to take your mind off of everything. 

You were so glad that the driver wasn’t trying to engage in a conversation with you because you weren’t in the mood at all. You just wanted complete silence. If you were to talk, you were going to burst into tears. And the last thing you wanted to do was permanently scar your Uber driver, so you decided to just stay silent. 

When you finally got to your building, you rushed out a quick thank you to the driver and you sprinted through the building and up to your apartment. The moment you stepped foot inside was the first time you breathed in the past two hours. As soon as you shut your front door you just collapsed into a heaping pile of tears. You were pretty much sobbing against your front door. This was the worst you’d ever felt in a really long time. You felt a mixture of anger, sadness, and pain. This was one of the sole reasons why you hated letting people in. Bringing those walls down meant that you were exposed and vulnerable. You had no defense what so ever. You tore those walls down just to have someone tear you apart, and leave you to pick up the pieces. You were torn apart by the person you needed the most. 

While you were at home bawling your eyes out, Harry was still wrapping his mind around what you said and what he didn’t say. The buzz he once had going was now gone, and his mind was all over the place. He didn’t even move from where he was sitting. He just sat outside and thought about it all. Harry realized that he not only had a type, but you had feelings for him. He thought that you only considered him to be a close friend and nothing more. But when you said “I, or anyone who looks like me…” he was able to read in between the lines to understand that you were mainly talking about yourself. It crushed Harry even more when he thought about the possibility of you not thinking that you were good enough for him. Simply because of his “preferences”, that were unbeknownst to him from the past. The fact that he made you feel this way was beyond gut wrenching and he just wanted to go back in time and tell you that the only type he has is you. That was one of the reasons that he clung to you the way he did. He looked to you as the model of what he could ever want in a partner. He always looked to you for your opinions and guidance because you were one of the best people that had ever came into his life. But instead of saying all of this, what he truly felt deep down, he didn’t say anything at all. He let you slip out of his grasp, and he didn’t know how to get you back. He didn’t even know if he was going to get you back. In that moment, he realized that his love for you went way beyond the general scope of being best friends. It wasn’t until 2 am that Harry was able to pick himself up from the lounge chair outside and go upstairs to bed. And even then, he still felt horrible. He was numb. He didn’t know what to do. He didn’t end up going to bed until 5 am because he couldn’t stop crying and worrying. What made him completely break down was the fact that he couldn’t even call you. He couldn’t talk to the one person that always helped him through his dark times and picked him up. He knew what it was like to hit rock bottom, but this was an all-time low for Harry. 

That night was officially at top of the list for the worst nights of you and Harry’s lives. 

The next day was just as bad, if not worse than the last. You ended up falling asleep on the couch, and Harry couldn’t even get out of bed. The both of you were a mess and you didn’t know what to do. You avoided any type of communication with each other. The only time you and Harry interacted was to tell him that you were using the gate code to get your car from his driveway. After that, there was radio silence. The simple thought of each other could bring you both to tears. This entire ordeal didn’t last for just a day or two. It lasted for almost a week. The both of you were too emotional and broken to even function. You were using the time you saved up on your job to sulk around at home and stay inside your bubble sadness and heartbreak. And Harry was neglecting all of the things that he needed to do so that he could stay in bed and try to take his mind off of you. But after what was going on to be day 5, Harry couldn’t take anymore of this. It wasn’t because he was feeling horrible. It was because Harry knew that he broke your heart. He had the clearest picture of you at home, completely broken up because of him. He could almost feel your pain and he hated it. He needed to tell you his true feelings and beg you to forgive him. He couldn’t sit around anymore and not talk to you. You were not only his best friend, you were also the woman that he loved. In the days of him sitting at home and thinking, he realized that he didn’t give it a shot. He didn’t give you a shot. He was constantly chasing after something that was already his and right in front of him. 

After a long much needed shower, Harry got himself dressed and ready to go over to your place. On the way over, Harry made a stop to the florist that was in your direction and picked up the biggest bouquet of sunflowers he could possibly buy. Not only were they your favorite flower, but you always seemed to gravitate towards the yellows because “they make my skin tone pop.” And they certainly did. Even remembering those little things could make Harry want to just burst into tears. For the rest of the drive to your apartment, Harry practiced all of the points he wanted to make out loud. He made sure that he remembered every last thing he wanted to say…and there was a lot. He was also preparing for the moment where you’d tell him that you didn’t want to talk to him ever again. Even though it may have seemed a bit extreme, he could understand why. He hurt you, and that’s the consequence that he’d have to pay. As he got closer and closer to your building, Harry could feel the butterflies in his stomach intensify and his lunch slowly make it’s way back up. He wasn’t feeling good at all, but he couldn’t turn his back on you and not try at all to redeem himself.

Between the time Harry got out of his car to when he was finally standing at your door was rough. As he got closer, his body got weaker. He was feeling a combination of embarrassment, sadness, anger, and worry. These feelings were so strong that he had to take two minuets before knocking on your door to stop himself from either throwing up or crying. Eventually he was able to get himself somewhat together and finally knock on your door.

When you hear the knock, you were sitting on your couch with your fluffy bathrobe on (that just so happened to be the one Harry brought you during one of his trips to Italy) with a pint of ice cream in hand, watching whatever was on the tv at the moment. You wanted to ignore the knock all together and just focus on your ice cream and the tv but you didn’t want to leave the person at the door hanging. So you reluctantly sit the cup down and you drag yourself to the door. When you look out through the peephole, your anxiety in that moment skyrockets. What in the world was Harry doing at your front door?! Even though you looked like an absolute mess and you didn’t want to talk to him in that moment, you still open the door for him.

When the door swings open and he sees you the waterworks begin all over again. He could see how puffy your face was from crying and how disheveled you looked and he hated it. He could feel the warm tears bubbling up in his eyes, but he was trying to do his best to keep them back. The two of you just stand there before Harry decides to talk. 

“M’so sorry Y/n.” That’s all he could say. He wasn’t just apologizing for what he said or didn’t say. He was also trying to say that he was a sorry person. It took him losing you for what felt like an eternity to really see how amazing you are and how much you contributed to his life.

“Wanna come in?” You ask him, stepping to the side to let him into your apartment. In that moment Harry just wanted to scoop you up into his arms and never let you go. He wanted to feel your warm and happy disposition that was now being clouded because of him. He wanted his Y/n back. When he walks inside, he quickly kicks his shoes off at the door and follows you into the kitchen.

“I got these for you.” He whispers, sitting the large bouquet on the counter and sitting on the other side.

“Thanks.” You whisper back to him, sending a soft smile his way. You wanted to almost to reassure Harry that you weren’t mad at him anymore. You were just sad and heartbroken. You never had feelings like these in such a large magnitude before. And because of this, you weren’t expecting any of what happened.

You silently turn away from him to grab the two vases you had in the cabinet and you sit them down on the counter in front of Harry. 

“I’m sorry if I overreacted on Friday. I just…” you mumble, beginning to unwrap the pretty flowers that were laying on the counter. You were trying to get your thoughts together but it was so hard. 

“You don’t have anything to be sorry about. It was all my fault for not saying anything or acknowledging you.” When he says that, your breaths become shakier and a tear slips from your eye. You continue to keep your focus on the flowers as you try to compose your next sentence in your head. You’re so caught up in your thoughts that you don’t even notice Harry coming around to your side of the counter. He softly pulls your hands away from the flowers and he pulls you into his body.

 That was the moment you needed. You thought your release was over the past few days but they were only building up to this. Feeling his arms securely wrapped around you was the only thing you wanted or needed from him. Feeling and hearing your cries only made Harry cry too. The both of you just stood there in your kitchen holding each other as you both poured your hearts out to each other through your tears. This time, not saying anything was saying everything. The both of you could feel what the other was feeling and wanted to say. It was like a large weight was lifted off of you both. After a few more moments of crying and being in your arms, Harry needed to get one thing off of his chest. When he pulls away from you he cups both of your cheeks in his hands and he looks right into your eyes. He wanted to make sure that you knew that he meant every last word that was coming out of his mouth. 

“I can’t even explain how sorry I am Y/n. You mean the world to me and I can’t even fathom the idea of not having you in my life. Seeing you completely broken the other night haunts me everyday and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to forgive myself for that. After not having your in my life, even if it was only a few days, I realized that I can’t live without you. I’ve spent so much time and energy looking for my match when I didn’t even bother to look right in front of me. The only type that I have is you. You’re absolutely stunning, inside and out. I feel like a proper dick for making you feel like you weren’t good enough for me. It’s me who’s not good enough. I let you down and I’ll never forget that. You’ve never left my side in the past 3 years and I couldn’t even give you a simple answer. I love you so much and I’ll never stop.” When Harry says this, the knife that was once burrowed in your heart was gone and the wound is patched up as if it never happened. Sure it’ll take time for it all to completely go away, but this was a hell of a good start. 

“I love you so much.” You whimper, feeling another heavy round of hot tears cascade down your face. Harry then pulls your head towards his and presses a long, warm kiss right onto your forehead. That, along with his previous words got rid of the clouds. You were happy again. Your once full sponge was now empty. This meant that you could fill it up again, only this time with feelings of love and happiness. You could finally retire from building walls around yourself and continue experiencing the good that came from being vulnerable. 

Masterlist

[bakuhoes-slut234]

Bakugou x reader smut - Meeting His Parents

A/N: Readers quirk is Electricity. Her quirk is very much like Denki's, except much weaker. Reader is in UA but in the Support Class.

_______________________________________________

"Y/N! GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!" Katsuki shouted from the bottom of the dorm stairs of the support class.

"HOLD YOUR FUCKING HORSES! IM ALMOST DONE!" She shouted back.

Today, Katsuki was introducing Y/N to his parents. They don't even know that he has a girlfriend yet. He just told them that he's bringing a friend over for dinner.

Y/N made her way down the stairs, smiling at how handsome her angry floof looked.

He was wearing black skinny jeans and a dark blue button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows and sneakers.

Y/N wore a dark blue skirt that reached her mid-thigh and a white cross-over crop top, along with a pair of black heels.

Bakugou looked up at the sound of footsteps and almost died. In his eyes, she looked absolutely breathtaking, not that he'd ever admit it to her or anyone else.

"Fina-fucking-ly" he grumbled

"Let's go Kat, I can't wait to meet your parents!" She beamed and held onto his arm.

They walked out of the dorms and in the direction of his house. They chose to walk since he lived nearby.

They stopped infront of an average looking house.

Bakugou walked up to the door and unlocked it with his spare keys and gestured for her to come in.

They got inside and took off their shoes. Bakugou put on his house slippers that were by the door and Y/N pulled her own ones from her handbag and put them on.

"WE'RE HERE!" He shouted, making Y/N winced at the volume before putting on her best smile.

A woman with spikey blonde hair and red eyes ran to the door with a scowl on her face.

"HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU NOT TO SHOU-" she cut herself off as she noticed Y/N. "Hi there, you must be Katsuki's friend. You're so pretty!"

"Um... Actually... I'm his girlfriend. My name's Y/N L/N but you can call me Y/N" she smiled

She looked between Y/N and Katsuki and frowned.

"You deserve so much better, you know that?" She said bluntly.

Y/N's smile faulted as the blonde woman said that.

"What the fuck you old hag!? You can't talk to my girlfriend like that!" He shouted

"I was talking to her. Y/N sweety, you can do so much better than this gremlin child." She said, making Y/N laugh.

"I think I'll stay with this gremlin thanks"

"You better fucking stay with me" Bakugou grumbled.

"Well, at least someone will deal with his shit. Thank you. You can call me Mistuki"

"Nice to meet you"

"Move you fucking hag, we've been standing at the door forever" Katsuki growled.

"Don't talk to your mother like that!" Y/N swatted his arm, earning a glare from the boy.

Mistuki showed them to the table, where the food was already set up and ready to eat. Y/N was introduced to Katsuki's dad and then they all sat down to eat.

The whole time, Mitsuki told Y/N about all of the stories from when Katsuki was a small child and after dinner, showed Y/N his baby pictures.

~

"Thank you for the lovely dinner Mistuki" Y/N smiled.

"It's no problem dear. It's the weekend Tommorow, correct?" She asked.

"Yeah"

"Good. You and Katsuki are staying the night then. Contact your parents to let them know, or whoever needed and then Katsuki will show you to his old room" she smiled.

"Thank you"

Y/N stood up and pulled out her phone, telling her parents that she's staying at a friend's house.

Afterwards, she went to locate her gremlin and found that he had just finished washing dishes.

"You done?" He asked and Y/N nodded.

He wiped his hands dry and then grabbed hers, dragging her down the hall.

Katsuki opened a door and motioned for her to go in first.

The room was simple, a double bed, a lot of hand posters, action figures and some clothes laying on his desk. But other than the clothes on the desk, his room was extremely clean.

Y/N walked in and day down on his bed, just looking around his room in awe.

"Here you go fuck face" he said and threw some clothes at her.

She thanked him with a kiss on the cheek and a hug.

Y/N set the clothes down onto his bed and started to pull off her shirt, but was stopped.

"Oi! What the fuck are you doing!?" He said

"What does it look like? I'm getting changed" she snapped at him

"You can't do that here! I'm still in the room!"

"It doesn't matter, we're dating and I'm not shy about my body." She said and pulled her shirt off.

She looked up to see Bakugou red faced and looking away to try and hide his blush, or give her some type of privacy, she couldn't really tell.

She was about to laugh at his red face until she took in his whole body.

He muscles were tensed, face red and looking to the side, and Y/N noticed his pants starting to tent.

She bit her lip, thinking up either a really good or really bad idea, we'll find out which one it is soon.

She slipped off the rest of her clothes, leaving on just her bra and panties.

She walked up to him, going unnoticed since he was looking away.

She placed both of her hands on his shoulders, getting his attention.

He turned to look at her and blushed, feeling his pants get tighter.

"W-what the hell?" He asked

"Let's have some fun" she suggested and pressed her hips against his.

Bakugou groaned but pushed her away gently.

Y/N frowned and stepped closer again, wrapping her arms around his neck.

He tried to look away from her again but she grabbed his chin with her thumb and index finger, forcing him to look at her.

She closed the distance between them, pressing her lips to his and hummed.

His hands found her waist and squeezed gently.

He swiped his tongue over her lower lip, asking for access, which she gave him.

Their tongues fought for dominance and surprisingly, Y/N won.

Her hands moved to the buttons of his shirt, quickly undoing them. He shrugged his shirt off as her hands got busy with the button and zipper of his pants. She quickly undid them and then broke the kiss.

She slowly moved down his body, letting her fingers graze over his toned chest and abs on her way down until she was on her knees.

She tugged on his pants, silently asking if she could remove them, to which he nodded.

Y/N quickly pulled down both his pants and boxers at the same time, releasing him from the restricting material.

She stared at the size of him, blushing profusely.

"Oi! Don't just stare" he growled, but not angrily, but more needy.

"Sorry" she said and gently wrapped her hand around his base.

She slowly pumped him, watching how he reacts.

His head rolls back as he released something that sounds like a groan and a sigh.

With a little more confidence, she let's go of him for a moment, and moved him so that he's sitting on the edge of his bed.

She sits on the floor between his legs and wraps her hand around him again, this time pumping a little faster and setting a steady pace.

Bakugou groaned and growls as Y/N speeds up her hand movements.

Suddenly, she gets an idea.

"Hey babe?" She said and he hummed in response.

"Can I use my quirk?" She asked.

He looked down at her, fear filling his eyes.

"Don't worry, I won't use it very much, I just want to try something" she explained.

Bakugou hesitantly agreed with a nod of his head.

Y/N smirked but wanted to do it when he least expected it.

She licked his tips before taking into her mouth, making him groan at the new feeling.

She swirled her tongue around him and bobbed her head on his length.

This continued for a few minutes until Y/N finally thought it was time.

She pulled him out of her mouth, making him whine and instead, gently brushed her fingers over his length.

She activated her quirk, using a tiny amount of electricity.

She sent small zaps onto him.

His hands flew into her hair, gripping tightly as he let out a moan.

Y/N took him back into her mouth, satisfied with his reaction.

She wrapped her hand around the part that would fit in her mouth and stocking him, using her quirk.

Bakugou's moans got louder and louder. His grip on her hair, painful but nothing she couldn't tolerate.

"I'm close" he moaned out.

Y/N felt him twitch in her mouth.

She let go of him and forced herself to take in his entire length.

He groaned loudly, telling her that he was almost there.

She placed a single finger, right at the base of his cock and activated her quirk, quite a lot stronger than before, but not enough to hurt him.

He gasped at the initial contact.

Y/N slowly started to pull off of him. As her mouth slowly moved off of his length, her finger traced from base to tip.

"Fuck~!" He growled loudly as he came.

Y/N made sure to keep her mouth over his tip as she let him release into her mouth.

His body shook as he reached his climax, his breath ragged, body glistening with swear and face flushed.

She swallowed the load she was given when he finally stilled and then removed him completely from her mouth.

She deactivated her quirk and then got to her feet.

Bakugou looked at her with lidded eyes, still panting.

She sat down on his leg, careful not to touch his member, knowing that he's sensitive right now.

She placed a peck on his lips and handed him his boxers.

She got up and put on his shirt that he gave to her earlier while he put on his boxers.

"W-wait" he said as she lay down on the bed

"Yeah?"

"Don't you want me to return the favour?" He asked

"Babe, I did that because I wanted to, you don't have to do it for me. Plus, seeing your face contorted in pleasure like that was enough for me" she said and went under the blanket.

"You sure?"

"Aw, you're so soft after you cum. That's cute. Normally you'd be swearing at me by now" she teased. Bakugou didn't even have enough energy to glare at her.

She patted the spot on the bed next to her

"Come on, let's go to bed"

He lay down and placed his head on her stomach, instantly falling asleep.

Y/N laughed to herself and kissed his head before dozing off.

[josienguyen1102]

Week 6 - How ideal body image on social media affect women's health

Thin-ideal body image on social media 

Until recently, the thin-ideal (slender, flat-chested, small-waisted female physiques) commanded White-centred mainstream media as the stereotypical depiction for beauty and was heavily pushed across various media, including television and publications, and notably social media (Ghaznavi & Taylor 2015). The slim-pervasiveness ideal is alarming since the media is not only the most prominent and influential sociocultural transmitter of beauty standards but also frequently includes images of celebrities who are unnaturally thin or appealing (McComb & Mills 2022). Every day, women are confronted with various skinny, attractive models and celebrities in the media. Meta-analyses of both interventional and correlational research have indicated that thin-ideal press coverage had a persistent and small-to-medium detrimental effect on women's body image (Brown & Tiggemann 2016). Women are demanding particular body features of celebrities, such as Kim Kardashian's eyes and jawline, as part of a new plastic surgery obsession (PRNewires 2015). For example, Claire Leeson, an English woman, has spent $30,000 for her "Kardashianization process," which includes but is not limited to breast implants, teeth whitening, hair extensions, and, most notably, butt padding (Time 2014) 

Fitspiration and thinspiration, often known as "fitspo" and "thinspo," refer to social media accounts and pictures that urge people to be fit and thin. When we look at a fitspo or thinfitspo photo, we see individuals continually comparing themselves to unattainable goals, believing it is natural to compare with those in good shape rather than merely slender and thus creating a form of healthy inspiration. However, these photographs' physique is frequently unrealistically skinny and is frequently altered using Photoshop to create a faultless, ideal body image. Since photographers and social media users have developed a common practice to digitally modify pictures to smooth and brighten skin, remove fat from body parts, and extend body parts or overall body images, the slim ideal has grown even thinner and more feasible for the average woman. (McComb & Mills 2022)

2. The impact on mood and psychological health

According to researchers, spending more time on Facebook relates to much more regular physique and weight comparisons, as well as unpleasant thoughts about one's body (Heger 2020). Exposure to thin-ideal images on social media, as well as social comparison to it, is correlated with greater body dissatisfaction, self-objectification, and decreased mood in both teenage girls and adult women (McComb & Mills 2022). Interpersonal attractiveness to slim celebrities was positively connected with eating disorder symptoms instead of average or obese celebrities. (Brown & Tiggemann 2016)

References:

Brown, Z & Tiggemann, M 2016, "Attractive celebrity and peer images on Instagram: Effect on women's mood and body image", Body Image, vol. 19, pp. 37-43.

Ghaznavi, J & Taylor, L 2015, "Bones, body parts, and sex appeal: An analysis of #thinspiration images on popular social media", Body Image, vol. 14, pp. 54-61.

Hjarvard, S., 2008. The mediatization of society: A theory of the media as agents of social and cultural change. Nordicom review, 29(2), pp.102-131.

Heger, E 2020, Why social media can make you feel bad about your body — and 3 easy tips to use social media to boost self-esteem, viewed 25 March, 2022, <https://www.insider.com/how-social-media-affects-body-image>.

McComb, S & Mills, J 2022, "The effect of physical appearance perfectionism and social comparison to thin-, slim-thick-, and fit-ideal Instagram imagery on young women’s body image", Body Image, vol. 40, pp. 165-175.

PRNewires 2015, Annual AAFPRS Survey Reveals Celebrity Look-Alike Surgery On The Rise, viewed 25 March, 2022, <https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/annual-aafprs-survey-reveals-celebrity-look-alike-surgery-on-the-rise-300024032.html>.

Time 2014, This Woman Has Spent $30,000 to Look Like Kim Kardashian, viewed 25 March, 2022, <https://time.com/2987566/kim-kardashian-lookalike-claire-leeson/>.

[lydiacatfish]

gonna go into some detail on these ocs so i can get them out of my brain and get back to my regularly scheduled korean webtoon inspired worldbuilding, but putting it under a cut because it's uhhh a little fucked up.

their names are Gortheth the Conqueror and, idk, let's call her Athena. names take me a while with my OCs. he killed her best friend for a really stupid reason right in front of her, so she tried to kill him for revenge, but discovered it was impossible. unfortunately this meant he took a liking to her and trained her up and made her his left hand man, until she killed his 2nd in command, at which point she took that place.

Gortheth cuts a big and imposing figure, absolutely covered in black armor, but under it all is kind of skinny dude with white hair (i was picturing that white haired elf guy from dungeon meshi? mithrun). pretty much every inch of him is covered in scars because although he can't be killed it's not like no one has tried. Athena just looks like an average woman, kind of chubby, brown hair, very unassuming. she eventually gets very scarred up too

anyway the more Athena grows to hate Gortheth the more he grows obsessed with her to the point that they eventually reach a stalemate because he's been encouraging her growth so much that she's been able to effectively hinder his, well, conquering. (Athena: cutting swaths through Gortheth's armies and actively leading rebellions against him in occupied territories without even trying to hide it. Gortheth: she's so tenacious. do you think she'd let me lick the ground she walked on?) she is eventually able to catch him off guard and dismember him and bury the pieces in far flung areas (much like hidan), but after a few hundred years someone digs up his head and he is able to sweet talk them into finding the rest of his body and putting him back together

however, as she was burying his head and finally getting her peace, he revealed that whatever was done to him to make him immortal, he had done to her. even if she did try to rid the world of him, he would always eventually come back, and she would always be there to meet him because she couldn't die and be free of him. this horrified her and she spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to kill herself

after he comes back he starts amassing power and conquering again and Athena is forced out of retirement to go stop him. of course, it was all a ploy to get her to come see him again. she threatens to dismember him again, he says he's figured out a way to keep her from doing that now, they're at a stalemate. finally, he offers to lie low and live a normal-ish life if only she'll come visit him for one day a year, every year, otherwise he'll start trying to take over the world again. she begrudgingly agrees. (this is when he takes the opportunity to goad her into hate-fucking him every year. kind of sad because he doesn't hate her at all but knows that that is the only emotion in her that's strong enough to elicit a physical response. gross and sad. anyway!)

Athena tries to live a regular life mentoring kids (maybe she owns like a martial arts dojo or something idk) and ends up as the mentor to a group of plucky young adventurers who follow her around like ducklings even though she is Not A Maternal Woman At All. and then obviously at one point she's like "fuck it's already may i gotta start getting ready for my trek out to the Black Plains of Despair to make sure my ex doesn't try to take over the world again" (obviously there's no way to get there besides walking!) and the kids are like ???????? (stephen colbert voice: you dated... the brutal dictator of nicaragua? yes and he was the brutal dictator while i dated him and i spent our entire relationship trying to murder him and unfortunately he was really into it.)

(the teens: you shouldn't have to go meet that guy once a year--

Athena: and usually have sex with him

the teens: --and what!! that's awful! that's coercion AT LEAST! it's not right!

Athena: listen sometimes for world peace you have to make sacrifices

the teens: THAT'S SO FUCKED UP)

anyway when leap years were invented she did briefly trick him into switching their date to february 29th but when he figured out what had happened the next year he did burn a small city. so. just because he's a simp doesn't mean he's not also like, completely evil.

also every year she tries a new murder method on him to see if it'll stick before she tries it on herself because she's not taking herself out until she can ensure she gets rid of him too. additionally she will threaten him like "if you ever try to hold my hand again i will cut off all your fingers and take them with me and throw them into the deepest part of the ocean i can find" and he's like haha and then what ;)

I don't even know how to describe this dream I had or why I kept going back to sleep after waking up so I could keep doing it. But like. This awful armored conqueror killed my best friend before I could save him, so I went back to try to kill him myself. And because I defeated him, he immediately made me his companion and put full faith in me despite the fact that I clearly hated him. So as we traveled I destroyed his outposts and killed tons of his people to weaken his political power and he had absolutely no suspicion it was me, even after I killed his right hand man and took his place. And it was hard on me and I became more hard and scarred and jaded and I knew I had to redeem myself in the eyes of normal people who would only see me as a killer after everything was over, I had to allow myself to become soft and vulnerable again. And then the dream sort of ended, and I just wanna know if, like. Dream me and the horrible man ever smashed.

[klaumiel]

You are all I’ve got, Austin//Chapter 6: Skylar

‘Russo!’ I heard from the corridor.

I got up from my cell floor after doing push-ups, the workout was the only thing that kept me disconnected from all the noise in here that was getting into me day by day more.

I approached the bars while wiping the sweat from my brow.

‘Mail for you’ I saw Jason approaching. He was one of the worse wardens I’ve ever met, one of those assholes who overuse their power to bring everyone else down. I knew him from my early days in Perch, he never liked me and didn’t have any problem with showing it. He always wanted to challenge himself and trying to rub me the wrong way, but sadly for him, it only worked once. Ever since they moved me here, he was on me every chance he got, and today wasn’t any different.

‘Looks like our pretty princess got himself a girl… is that the chick that came the other day? Fine ass …’ he said sniffing the envelope with this stupid smile on his ugly face. I felt my blood starting to boil, my jaw clenched when he approached the bars. Keep fucking calm.

He passed me the envelope but didn’t want to let go, I looked in his eyes. He brought his face closer and whispered ‘Is a shame you didn’t fuck her on that table, that would’ve been quite a view.’

I pulled the envelope from his hand, got even closer to his face, looking down on him. He was a small fat prick with a bold head, playing strong but I beat the shit out of him a few years back. But he knew I won’t do it now, not being so close to freedom.

‘Unfortunately for you, it is a view you will never see.’ I walked off, I could sense his fury.

I sat on the bed looking at the envelope. Of course, it is from her. I recognized now the familiar sweet smell of her perfume. I opened the envelope inside were two photos of her and a pink note stuck on one of them.

‘’Surprise ’’

I smiled and looked at the pictures, there were different from the ones she sent me before. On the first one, she smiled, with her hair blown by the wind standing on the beach, golden sun glowing on her face, waves covering her naked legs, while she held her dress. On the second picture, she was holding a bouquet of white lilies. Her gorgeous eyes looking right at me. She is so beautiful.

On the back of the second photo, she wrote :

‘’ Life isn’t perfect, but every second with you is. I can’t wait for the day when I don’t have to miss you anymore. ‘’

I stared at both photos, remembering every second of our time together a few days ago and how I felt being around her, her smile so sincere and kind, those beautiful olive eyes so peaceful. Still, with this spark that instantly drove me crazy, she didn’t have to even try. Her perfect body, so delicate and hot at the same time, just perfect. That raven black hair, so soft like silk.

All those feelings I never felt before, where did they even come from? I knew I cared about her, she was special.  But that moment I saw her in the flesh, touched her, kissed. All those weird new feelings made me realise she was something else. There wasn’t just a physical attraction but this enormous emotional connection that we’ve built over the months. Just being there with her, talk, laugh, touch made me feel all sort of different ways. Ways that I never experienced.

I didn’t know if that’s how love felt like, I never been in love before. I only knew that I don’t want to stop feeling it. She became the most important person in my life, the only person I loved.

I missed her, and that somehow scared me, the feeling of losing her like I’ve lost my pop. That thought only confirmed that I have to protect her at all costs, even if that cost is my own life, after all, she saved mine.

I was here, days from my last court day thanks to her, and the only thought in my head was, how did I even get so lucky? I made a promise to myself that I would never come back to my old life. This was a chance for me to start again, and I was ready to do everything to use the most of it. Not only for myself but for her, I wanted her to know that everything she did for me was worth it. From the moment I saw her, she became my main goal. Making her smile every day, protect and feel special was the only thing I wanted to do.

I’ve been lost in my thoughts, staring at Maya’s pictures missing her more and more every second.

‘Girlfriend?’ I heard a voice snapping me from my thoughts.

It was Skylar, he was my new cellmate, he was put in here temporarily a week ago, he got accused of starting a fire in his school’s lab. He kept saying he is innocent but isn’t everyone here saying that? Somehow, I believed the kid. He did look like a troublemaker, but he didn’t strike me as someone who would risk people’s lives for a bit of fun. Whatever fun was for him.

I’ve made a small connection with this kid, he also had a girl on the outside. After leaving her behind, he tried to escape but got caught, she had no idea he was locked up, he promised to come back for her. Ironically enough, they also met on Lovelink.

‘Huh?’ I looked at him confused, he wasn’t in the cell before I sat down.

‘I asked if this is your girlfriend?’

Is she? What is she for me apart from the first girl I ever loved?

‘Kind of…’ I said still holding the photos

‘Jason is talking about her around. He is such an asshole, everyone knows now she came to visit you… but lucky you. You will be out soon. Is it true what they are saying? ’

‘What they are saying?’ I asked, already getting annoyed. I knew exactly what Jason was saying about Maya, he made sure I can hear it each time.  I swear if not for her I would finish him the first chance I have.

‘That she saved your ass from the death row’ He said a little bit unsure if he should

‘Well, they already saying it so is no point for me to lie, I will be out of here in few days anyway… Yes, she did, she proved my innocence and saved my ass. But she did a lot more than that. Unfortunately for you, this is only for me and her to know.’

‘That’s sick, mate! I won’t ask for more, that’s none of my business… only one …What’s her name?’ He asked, looking at the photos I’ve been holding.

‘Maya’ I said with a slight hesitation sliding the photos back into the envelope and putting it under my pillow. Connection or not I can’t trust him, he’s been here only a week.

‘You know I never thought that women can have such power over us men. It takes only one pretty little person to change our way of seeing things. I’ve never imagined myself wanting to pump the breaks after meeting her. Crazy huh? This whole situation showed me that it is ok to have some fun, but it is time to grow up’ He laughed laying in bed, looking at the ceiling.

‘Better late than never’ I whispered and approached the bars and waved to the warden. Luckily Jason was walking on the other side of the corridor, so I didn’t have to see his ugly face.

‘It’s my time’ I pointed at the clock. We had times scheduled when we can leave our cells, and my time was already running ‘ I need to use the phone.’

A young warden – clearly new, unlocked the cell and let me out. ‘I don’t know if you will manage to get to the phones today, but you can try.’

I looked around the hall when walking to the phones. Most of those guys were kids, barley eighteen, probably first time seeing jail. That reminded me of my early days in prison, I wasn’t much older than them. They have so much to learn if they want to survive here, but lucky for me all this soon will be in the past.

When I was getting closer to one of the free phones, one of the new ones got up and started to walk fast towards it. I looked at him, he was tall but skinny, clearly exhausted. He looked like he didn’t have a good start here, he knew I could beat the shit out of him without breaking a sweat, so he decided to back off. I got to the phone and looked at him again.

‘ I will wave you once I’m done, you can use it then’ I said, he nodded and sat down by the table.  I might look big and scary, but I’m not a monster.

I dialled Maya’s number, hoping she will answer. It was in the middle of the afternoon, she was probably working, but I had to talk to her, I missed her too much.

‘Hello handsome’ I heard her sweet voice

‘Hello, beautiful’ I smiled ‘ I hope I’m not disturbing, it’s a middle of your working day after all.’

‘ You are never disturbing me, it’s not a very busy day anyway. I will be getting ready to go to our office party soon.’

‘Office party? Sounds boring ‘ I laughed

‘ You are right. It’s not really a party. It’s five years of the company kind of party, boring speeches and mostly boring people’ She laughed ‘ But I have to go, Greg has some surprise for me. I have no idea what it is.’

‘Maybe a nice pay rise, I’m sure you are working really hard.’

‘Oh no, definitely not. I am already getting way more than an average accountant. I will find out when I get there I guess… And how are you? ‘

‘I’m good, a lot better after receiving your photos.’

‘ You like it? I picked the best I had.’

‘Very… you are so beautiful and just wanted to say that I also can’t wait for the day when I don’t have to miss you anymore.’

‘Cheesy!’ She laughed ‘ Soon… now is just downhill. Your lawyer said probably next week, so you better start packing your sexy ass, because I already made a space for you in the house.’ I could hear how happy she was, and somehow that made me even happier.

‘You didn’t have to, I only need space in your bed, I don’t think we are going to leave it for some time, so the rest can wait.’

‘Well honey, challenge accepted, my bed is very comfortable and has more than enough space for two naked bodies’ Her voice has soft and sexy

‘That’s all we need’ I said, but at this point, I couldn’t think about anything else, just me and her. But that wasn’t the typical feeling, it was only her I wanted, nobody else just her. I craved her like never craved any woman, I never saw her naked, never touched that way, but the feeling of having her drove me crazy. Just the thought of it made me lose control of myself. What the hell is she doing with me?!

‘Austin? Are you there? Are you OK?’ Shit, did I go quiet?

‘Yes, I’m here, baby. I just got lost in thoughts for a second. I just can’t wait to be close to you again.’

‘Soon… just remember to let me know when is your big day. I want to be there to take you home.’

‘I will definitely let you know. Listen, baby, I need to go. The phones are very busy today. And there is this kid here, I think he is having a hard time. I’m sure he would want to talk to someone familiar. I will be out soon, and he might be here for some time’ I said looking at the kid, some other guys were circling around him like

‘Look at you getting all soft’ she said

‘It’s all you, you showed me that helping others is important. You helped me why I can’t do the same for someone else? ‘

‘I love this part of you, you know?

‘And I love you.’

‘Love you too. Go, and start getting ready. You need to be in your top form when you get here’  Damit, again that sexy voice! ‘Bye, handsome’ She hangs up before I even got my thoughts together

I waved to the kid sitting by the table, he approached me.

‘Thank you, I’ve been waiting for two days to call my dad.’ He said

‘What’s your name, kid?

‘Taylor’ He said evidently scared

‘Listen, Taylor. I will be in the library. I can give you few tips how to make your time in here easier, you can come and find me there in about half an hour… and now go and call your dad’ I said patting him on the shoulder.

A few hours later, after talking to Taylor, I was sitting in my cell reading some boring book, that I managed to sneak from the library. Skylar was quiet, he looked worried.

‘What’s bothering you?’ I asked tossing the book aside

He shuffled in his bed but kept looking at the ceiling.

‘You know… my whole life I’ve been doing a lot of crazy shit. Adrenaline was my second name, running away from cops all the time, and never getting caught. I didn’t care at the time, but as soon as I wanted to chill, stop this and focus on something that might be more important, I  got caught  and put in here for something I actually didn’t do.’

‘When did you realise it? That you need to pump the breaks?’ I felt like he needed to get it off his chest.

‘After the date. I broke into the chief police officer’s house and invited her over, she had no idea. I wanted to impress her, plus a bit off adrenaline … but he came back home, we had to run, I thought she was behind me, but she wasn’t. I felt horrible for leaving her there, so I went back, but she wasn’t there anymore. She was fuming after that,  I thought that she won’t speak to me again, and that made me think, what if I am taking things a little bit too far? Is OK if I’m putting myself at risk, but someone else is an entirely different story. She kind of brought me back to earth. I really like her and …, and I hope she will wait for me.

‘No the best choice for a date, I  have to admit, but you’ve learned something from it, that’s the most important’ I said looking at Jason standing by our cell. What the fuck does he want now?

‘Quinn, you are out! Pack your ass and kiss the princess goodbye.’ Jason said, opening the cell.

He started to pick up his stuff, he turned to me.

‘That was quick, I just spoke with my lawyer a couple of hours ago.’

‘Well, you are free now, make sure you take that girl of yours on a proper date’ I laughed

‘I definitely will, we should keep in touch after you are out of here.’ He said, pointing at my pillow  ‘Take care, mate. Thanks for everything. And good luck with Maya.’ He held his hand towards me.

‘Take care of yourself, Skylar’ I shook his hand and patted him on the arm.

‘Ok, hurry up, kid!’ Jason called him, Skyler walked off. That’s was it, now it was just me left still waiting.

I reached under my pillow, where I left the envelope with Maya’s photos. Next to it was a note with his phone number and email address, I’ve put the message into the envelope hoping that there won’t be any inspections before I’m out.

I spent the next few days with Taylor, giving him some tips on how to survive in this place. At least nobody messed with him when I was around.

He was put in jail for five months for stealing money, his father was sick, and they didn’t have money for his treatment. Taylor was only eighteen and terrified, older inmates were taking advantage of his weakness, he wasn’t strong enough to fight back, which made him an easy target. And having Jason walking around and only looking for trouble didn’t make it any easier. He already picked Taylor as his next target.

I told him to hang around in the library, keep a low profile and stay away from other guys problems.

I asked myself many times, how this was possible?  For the last seven years, I never helped any of the other inmates. Always kept away from others and their problems. What changed now? First, Skylar, I would never open up to a new guy after a week. Then Taylor, what came into my mind to help this kid? Why I felt sorry for him? And why it feels so good doing this?

And the answer to all those questions was always one; Maya.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the phone call with Austin, I started to get ready for the party. No matter how boring, I was happy to finally see all those faces again. I didn’t see my colleagues for weeks.

Shaun found a house and moved out a couple of days earlier. Things with Angel were going well for him, so he decided to find a place for himself, but I knew that he wanted to give me and Austin some space, he knew we will need it.

I checked myself in the mirror one last time, changed my shoes and walked to my taxi.

I walked into the office, full of familiar faces in full party mode.

‘Maya! Long time no see, girl ‘ I heard Sara coming towards me with the drink in her hand.’ Look at you, stunning as always’ She gives me a hug

‘ Hi Sara, long time indeed’ I smiled and hugged her back – she was the most two-faced and hateful person in the office. Her being nice meant serious business, I knew that I have to avoid her tonight at all cost. But I saw Greg coming to rescue me from the viper.

‘ Sorry, but I need to steal Maya for a few minutes’ He said, grabbed my hand and led towards his office ‘ I need to talk to you before everyone gets drunk here.’                    

We walked to  his office, he pointed me to sit down. He poured some of my favourite wine and passed me the glass.

‘I’m happy you came today, I know it is not easy for you because of Gemma’ he said, taking a seat on the other side of his desk.

‘ I’m okay with Gemma, we just don’t speak that’s all. She will come around eventually. I was actually thinking about coming back to the office in a few weeks’ I said, looking around. Something was different, I saw a familiar touch to it. Who else if not Gemma would put two diffusers right next to each other.

‘I brought you here because I have an offer for you. You know that our company is growing, we are opening new departments soon. We hired new people in the financial sector, but the team is growing. I need someone on my level, who will take over the Finance part of the business. You are my best accountant, you know our finances inside and out. I can’t see anyone else in that role. We are opening a position for you as Finance Director if you accept of course ‘ He said taking a sip of wine – he knew I wanted this more than anything. That was the most significant step in my career, ever. I worked my ass to get where I was then. He knew I won’t refuse it.

‘Oh my god, Greg … I don’t know what to say, thank you’  I smiled with excitement.

‘ I will take it as, yes.’

‘And who is going to take over my job? Is a lot work for a junior position’ I asked, but I kind of knew the answer already.

‘Gemma, she just finished a few main trainings, and she is capable of doing most of the main work. Plus she will have a junior assistant. I need you to focus on a bigger picture. If not you and your hard work we won’t be celebrating five years right now. You are the only person I can trust with this.’

‘Greg, this is really an honour I am speechless… and are you and Gemma still together?’ I said looking at the plant on his desk- he hated plants, he always called ‘a woman thing’.

‘Yes, she has grown on, I was wrong by judging her, she didn’t use me. It was all me, in my head. She always struck me as someone like that, but she proved me wrong, and I am glad. She deserves the promotion. I have fallen for her silliness and positivity, we will see where this will go. So far, it is going well.’ He said with a gentle smile on his face, he seemed happy, finally.  Gemma, smartass. Always gets what she wants.

‘ I am happy for you two.’

‘Now... I know we have a party, but that’s not all. I’ve spoken to Shaun about you, and I made a decision. Your job starts in the next three or four weeks, but I need Gemma to get up to speed before you start. So, in the next few days, I need you to pass all your work to her and take a break—at least three weeks. I need you to relax, focus on your man and yourself and come back to the office refreshed and happy. You need this Maya, and I won’t take a no as an answer.’

‘ Well, if you say so, I won’t object’ I laughed

‘Cheers to our new F.D’ he smiled and clicked my glass

I was so happy, this was the best day of my career. I worked so hard for it.

After Greg’s speech, I went to get myself another drink and some snacks, I approached the minibar and started digging in. But all those healthy snacks just put me off, suddenly I sentenced a familiar smell of cherry blossom and jasmine.

‘Hi Gemma’ I said without turning around just yet, I knew she was standing right behind me.

‘Maya, can we talk?’ I heard her sweet voice, and something in me snapped. Suddenly the feeling of missing her hit me again, I turned around and saw her standing in from of me. My girl, I missed her so much.

‘Yes’ I said and nodded her towards the empty offices, she grabbed herself a drink and walked with me. I closed the door and sat on the desk, crossing my legs.

‘I wanted to talk to you because I want to apologise. It was wrong for me to say all those things. I was wrong in doubting you, not the first time, but as always you showed me how wrong I was. I feel horrible, you needed me all this time, and I just walked off. Like a coward, I miss you, girl.’ She said, looking at the floor. Her eyes filled with tears.’ I know that it was you voting for me in the recognition, I know that you told Greg to give me a chance. Even after everything I said. I wouldn’t be here building my career without your help. I feel like I was so ungrateful all this time, for everything you did for me… I don’t deserve a friend like you’ She cried.

I jumped off the desk and hugged her.

‘Stop it you silly thing… You know I am not mad, I thought you needed time, that’s why I didn’t call you. Don’t ever say that you don’t deserve to be my friend. You are my friend, my sister, and no matter what, no matter how big the fight I will always look after you. I love you, boo.’

‘I will understand if we can’t come back to how was before, but if you could ever forgive me for all I’ve said…’

‘Gemma’ I cupped her face and looked in her eyes ‘ There is nothing to forgive, you had the right to be afraid, I could’ve very easily fallen into the same trap as with Luke. It was hard for you as well being there with me and supporting me. The whole situation with Austin was a big unknown, for me as well. I should’ve thought about your feelings as well, and I am sorry for that, I was blinded, and I didn’t know how this could look like from your perspective. I acted selfishly, not just with you but with everyone else. And I am truly sorry for that’  I wiped her smudged make-up with my sleave.

‘I love you, girl. I missed you so much.’

‘ Do you want to come to my place now? We can talk, without worrying about looking like a mess? Plus this party is fucking boring me to death. I need some good drink, and some normal snacks not this falafel shit.’ I laughed

‘Yeah, let’s have some proper party’ She giggled

Five minutes later we sneaked to the taxi and went back to my house. I was so happy to have my girl back. I knew that she needed time, we had issues like this before, and only time could fix it. I knew in a few days everything will come back to normality, the only thing we both needed was a drinking bonding time.

We changed to PJ’s sat on the sofa with a bottle of scotch, crisps, and party music and started to talk about everything that happened in the last six weeks. She asked about Austin, and  I told her everything.

‘ So he will be out soon?’ She asked

‘Yes, hopefully, next week. I can’t wait to see him again, you have no idea. I don’t know what the future holds for us, but I want to be here for him, he deserves it.’

‘I am so happy, it worked for you, somewhere deep inside I knew this must have a happy ending but I was to too scared to admit it. Somehow I only saw everything that happened with Luke, and that terrified me. But again, you showed me how wrong I can be.’

‘Everything worked out well in the end.’ I smiled

‘ So is he as hot as on the photos?’ She asked with this mischievous look

‘Girl! Hot is an understatement, well I didn’t see everything, but if someone can make the orange pants look so sexy, must be the god himself under them. And woman! Those eyes! I never saw in my life, such as deep blue eyes. So mysterious, intriguing and dangerous, but with that softness and kindness deep inside. So fucking sexy.’

‘Wow, I can sense fanny flutters here. I need details… you know that. You have a week, and then I need a full report on my desk’ She laughed, taking a sip of the whiskey from the bottle.

‘Hang on a minute, I just realized … I am your boss now.’

‘Shut up! Not yet! In four weeks, so I still have the rights to make demands, before you get your fancy office… This calls for a toast, for our sexy boys and our promotions ’ She raised the bottle and passed it to me.

‘For our hot males! And the new offices! And getting back together! ’ I laughed

We’ve been giggling, crying, drinking and dancing all night, just like before. I was so happy to have my girl back. Maybe this whole fight was needed for both of us to understand how much we need each other? We weren’t just friend, after all, we were sisters.

We woke up on the floor with a massive hangover, but happy.

We spent a whole day together, recovering from the night before.