#[dONT TOUCH ME.....I FOUND SOMETHING I CAN RELATE TO sobs

[sentofight]

ooc. My brother told me that akihiko 's new va is half Lebanese and now all I want is to hear akihiko speaking Arabic in the Lebanese dialect... If va does not make the Lebanese jokes I will.

Imagine akihiko saying "yo'burne" ...BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! hABIBI!!!! YA ROOHI!!! *Insert that one song that says come come and let us make our dreams come true when akihiko says let's let our body do the talking AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA* alright going to the loony tony place. ngl lebanese arabic is not my favorite for reasons but hey, idc now i want aki to speak in that now. perhaps i should ask the va to i dunno say something hmhmhmh. aki saying شو ناطر هل اللحظة instead of i've been waiting for this is killing me XDDD

[crescenthoax]

Hi I’m that anon who sent you the GOT quote and I just wanna say to this beautiful bit 😭 “As for Floris and Aemond I know [my] Aemond is not everyone’s favourite but I don’t know… I feel like the lore about them I think every night before falling asleep is too deep and complex to even begin with. I adore them, even though he’s terrible and she deserves so much better, and yes, I see everyone pointing out that he’s not exactly mourning her but I think he is in his own way -and I will write about it. Just because.”

GIRLLL YOU DONT KNOW HOW MUCH /I/ LOVED THEM. They weren’t the main couple but I feel like all your side pairings are so much full of intrigue and drip with life. But yeaaahh um I loved them, I loved the whole “they prefer to look at each other than touch each other” thing and how less physical They were, I loved their opposite personalities, and I loved how they kept their relationship to themselves and away from prying eyes of not just the other characters like Annika but to the reader as well (unfortunately I’m a nosy bitch who wanted to see) They also reminded sooo much of Joanna and Tywin “Only Lady Joanna truly knows the man beneath the armor, and all his smiles belong to her and her alone.” LIKE.. ugh my heart.

I definitely overromanticized them to a problematic degree in my head 😭 I’m an optimist but I was so excited for the Christmas au bc I thought they’d get the happy ending they’d been robbed of by the Caswells in the main verse, I thought starting with them being broken up meant that their arc would be them getting back together so imagine my surprise and heartbreak when I read part 2 😭😭😭😭😭

I definitely feel more than a little silly for misinterpreting their relationship so much and hearing that they don’t actually “belong” together in that way, Idk. I don’t hate your Aemond but I do want to shake him and scream that he needs to get his act together and BECOME BETTER AND BECOME DESERVING of her because in my head, she was all he wanted. Idk. It’s stupid but I wanted them to be happy together so badly. I still really ship them even after alla dat which makes me a little bit of a 🤡 but I LOVE pain if I didn’t, I wouldn’t have made it this far into Aegon and Annika’s story.

I think so many of the readers associated the found family with all three of the couples just being siblings together so it’s easy to forget how much Aemond loves our girl Annika, if he’s disloyal to his wife which I think is sad and a little unfair but a valid reading. I’m also not ready to let go of this familial dynamic, it was definitely my favorite. I just hope for the best for all of the Targtowers and their remaining wives especially Aegon and Annika, but I know whatever you come up with, I’ll be happy with even if I’m sobbing on the floor.

Jeez that Tywin and Joanna’s comparison was truly something.

And, to be fair, I don’t think there’s such a thing as 'misinterpreting them.' I believe you can interpret their relationship however you want and also perceive the characters alone as you please. That's what's fun and magical about reading. As a writer, I would never say, 'no, actually…' when someone tells me their views on a character or a pairing—unless you're saying something absolutely out of context, like when someone said Annika enjoyed being with Jacaerys or that she didn’t love Floris. I want people to feel a genuine connection to the story and perhaps find themselves in the characters, to relate to them. I also love to see how what I’ve written is interpreted because it helps me a lot to see if people understand where I’m pointing. So, if you think they were in love (they were, I just think that if it were up to him he would’ve never taken a wife at all), then it’s okay. Aemond is a complicated dude driven by duty and greed, but yes, he loved her, and he’s in pain right now though he doesn’t let it show. Modern Aemond and Floris, however… I don't know I feel like modern Aemond would be so insufferable about women. Love him though.

On a side note, of course he loves and deeply cares about Annika too. I think I already talked about this, but he cares about her as an individual and also as an extension of his brother’s honour. That's why he’s mad and upset about the entire baby situation, perhaps even more than Aegon. I think Aegon feels guilty, and he’s sick with worry thinking about everything Aemond is pointing out. But I believe we can all agree that we are all going to miss this family so much. I even have to confess that I wrote that Christmas au because I was too depressed about the main fic and I missed Floris and the six of them and I wanted Helaena to be happy lol.

[satans-codpiece]

Okay so I proved myself wrong, about me saying I'm dropping everything I'm doing to read your stuff. I found out about Eleven Years Chpt. 5 in the morning and had to go to work RIP. Needless to say I was very distracted and as soon as I got home I got ON IT-

Bit of a shame for my wireplay obsessed ass you didn't go a bit harder on that but GOd it was still hell of a ride. Reader getting handsy after the fucking and Ram not handling it well™ was.... oooooof. I'm so normal-

I guess since I got on the EY hype train, mind if I just, go nuts a little more??? I could be biased here cuz Ramram, but HOW did you actually, genuinely make me feel sad for the captor in a Stockholm syndrome scenario????? HELLO???? What wizardry did you pull to do that??????? Like yeah Ram kidnapped reader and is lowkey torturing them without fully realizing it, but he's so awfully genuine with everything else????????????

And just. Okay slightly late to the party but in chpt. 4, the conversation about Ram being afraid of touch both to not accidentally harm reader AND the reputation of his model is just....... When I read that, my reaction could only be described as going absolutely fucking feral. Bro do not EVER worry about characterization again because jeSUS CHRIST-

I actually ended up showing that set of paragraphs to a friend that isn't in this fandom much (likes a different hero a whole lot and is loosely aware of everyone else, kind of like me actually lol) aaaaand their reaction was pretty much the same as mine-

And to not ignore what you replied with my last anon ask bc lordy I'd feel bad: ... I mean.... if you wanna build up to a big piv scene.... *glosses over your WIP list* I can see Hanakaki going there pretty easily, without all the painful emotional mindfuckery that comes with kidnapping...

LMAO I feel like Blizz employees (the creative art-related team, to be more accurate) are not really allowed to interact with fandom so their ideas don't get influenced by fanon and therefore the company does not get accused of stealing ideas or whatever. BUT, here's a funny idea... since these people write fanfiction that is actually canon... Can you imagine someone writing out their dirtiest fantasies and said writing having to be actually archived at Blizz because intellectual property LOOOOOL-

soBBING THAN K YOU this was such a delight to open my inbox to!!!

hehehe for what it's worth, if I do end up writing the prequel there will be a bigger focus on wireplay (given that it's before he's made any modifications to himself) :3c

but ah I'm so glad you sympathized with Ramattra because that's exactly what I wanted!! He's done something awful- is doing something awful- but he's doing it because he loves you so much. Everything he's done, he's done because he's had a hard life and you were one of so few good things he's had. I really wanted the reader (ie the real people not the stand in character) to have... complicated feelings about this version of Ramattra.

and ;_; thank you... being OOC is truly just my nightmare of writing, I need my blorbos to be perfectly canon-aligned (or explicitly AU'd) or I'll die.

but in particular fjdshg yes! When Ramattra was actually striving for peace, he had to work against such heavy biases against him simply because of his model (both the vendor in Nepal and Nameless make comments on him being an r-7000 as soon as he meets them), so he must be acutely aware that he is treated differently than other omnics.

HAHAHA it's SO funny of all my WIPs you mention hanahaki... because 1) Hanahaki is actually like 4 paragraphs from being done and 2) there isn't a shred of nsfw in it! I wrote it just to write some angsty pre-relationship stuff, but ultimately just is emotional porn, nothing physical.

Ah that's probably to some degree true! I'd love to see someone working w Blizz just. sit on all their nsfw fics and works until they quit and be like. 'haha yeah i JUST made all these. definitely not under contract w Blizz dont worry about it :>' [piles of concept Ramattra porn fall out of their jacket]

[azucanela]

Can i please have a headcanons for Keigo and Shinsou with a female s/o that really likes manga and anime but keeps it a secret from others because they talk shit and make fun of her? and like one day they accidently find out and she's kinda embarressed about it but they convince her that everything is fine and they think ist cute how happy they are when they talk about something she loves? Uwu :9 (sorry for my bad english)

secret anime and manga fan s/o headcannons  [ft. keigo takami, shinsou hitoshi]

SUMMARY: Y/N has been hiding the fact that she likes anime and manga from her lovely boyfriend for a while now, fearing he’d find it weird. now, she has no choice but to address the fact that he knows. 

WORD COUNT: 1.6k

WARNINGS: threats

A/N: your english is great bb! uwu owo this was relatable askdakjhds if anyone tells you there is something wrong with watching anime or reading manga, let me tell you that they are WRONG. i will fight them for you<3

KEIGO TAKAMI | PRO HERO HAWKS

you used to talk about animes you liked because at the end of the day they are tv shows thats it, same with mangas, they are like books but cooler lol

but people found that “weird” for some reason, because anime is a “cartoon” and thats so gross omg haha these “cartoons” make me sob um watch a silent voice and cry with me kids

anyways

you’re watching anime in the comfort of your home, just vibing. no one is coming over today, you have time to yourself to enjoy your lil show that nobody should be judging you for

well, you thought no one was coming over

keigo has a tendency to just like, show up at your house sometimes when hes bored or in the midst of an uneventful patrol. though he rarely is seen in public, especially on the streets, he does fly-bys constantly

anyways, he was bored, or just relieved of duty for whatever reason, like lunch. he is having chicken nuggets, he is a cannibal, be ashamed H A W K S, smh

anyways, he just shows up at your house, like he lowkey breaks in through the balcony of your apartment, but its fine because you leave it open for him, but normally he texts you to let you know he’s coming but today was the exception because he’s adorable and wanted to surprise!!! you!!! with!!! food!!!

so he comes in, and he sees you are on your couch, just watching your lil anime, and you are SO INTO IT MAN like you are lowkey yelling at the TV whenever a character does something, and when that one character you hate comes on you’re like throwing hands with nothing

keigo is internally screaming because why are you so CUTE

he kinda forgets for a second that you don’t know he’s there, he has no idea what’s going on in this show, and he’s still holding chicken nuggets and fries

this is why he just kinda screams at a character who does something stupid, that totally could’ve been avoided, effectively startling you

now you are both screaming for separate reasons as you turn around to look at him, and now you are panicking because oh no, he KNOWS 

his wings are fluttering and he feels bad for scaring you as he comes up to wrap his arms around your shoulders, “sorry baby! but that guy is so dumb.”

you are MORTIFIED and now you’re like, “oh my god, you must think im so weird-”

keigo is confused, why would he think that? he genuinely doesn’t realize that people make fun of you for watching anime and he’s so confused by it when you inform him that a lot of people tend to find it weird 

“what?”

“people think its weird so i just-” hahahhasdha keigo lowkey wants to take time out of his day in his professional agency to find out who told you it was weird and made you think you had to hide this from him because he wants to know everything about you! you are the love of his life! you shouldn’t feel the need to hide things!

now he feels like maybe he did something to make you think you had to hide your love for anime even though it is literally adorable to watch you

“baby, it’s not weird. i actually think its cute how angry you get at the characters. and i AGREE like how could he just do that-”

“wait you don’t care...?” you are BLUSHING because he thinks you are CUTE not that you didn’t know this already since he was dating you but like

omg

“of course not, also would you mind restarting this anime, im kind of invested- oh and i brought chicken nuggets”

you lowkey wanna cry he’s so cute

he can tell you don’t believe him so he sets the food down on a coffee table and takes your face in his hands and is all like, “baby. i promise you its fine. and adorable. now let’s restart this show so i can watch with you.”

he winks at you and now you’re like, “whatever no i am NOT restarting.”

then he gets all pouty but its fine he doesn’t need to understand the plot to watch with you and enjoy every moment, he also likes when you explain it really excitedly with all these hand movements, and he especially enjoys when you get mad at characters

he finds it hot 

hates when you have a crush on a character he gets so jealous and is not afraid to show it kjahsdahsdsh mans will start hating the character just because you keep talking about how hot they are

“they’re just so BEAUTIFUL.”

keigo, self consciously touching his winds, “im beautiful too...”

he’s so cute

throws popcorn at the screen whenever that character comes on

SHINSOU HITOSHI

hahjsdgjasgdj

THIS BOY is so pretty

anyways you probably fell asleep reading manga, or watching anime or something like that, so it’s like 1AM and you were BINGING because that stuff is great and nobody is there to bother you while you read and watch and stuff its you time

and for some reason people have been opposed to this in the past? so now whenever people come to your room your manga are all like lowkey hidden and you make sure there is no evidence of anima

you did NOT want shinsou finding out and thinking you were weird or anything like that, even though liking anime and manga is NOT weird!!!

if anyone tells you other lmk and i will have strong words with them

so you fell asleep and shinsou comes over because he realizes he forgot something in your room, and like the GENTLEMAN he is, he knocks, but you are asleep and do not hear him!

he’s like eh worst case scenario she’s cheating on me and i end up heartbroken, and this is something he genuinely considers sometimes and he would definitely blame himself if he got cheated on

so he sees you sleeping and you are like a mess because you did not intend to fall asleep, so you’re like in your desk chair, the manga is wide open on your desk or your computer is on and there’s the still going anime aksjdhkjdhas

your neck is in a weird funky way that’ll probably hurt in the morning and shinsou is like oh no i gotta move her i dont want her in pain, he is also wondering why you look so cute because what the hell this is unfair stop it

tbh he probably barely notices the manga, like he’ll just nonchalantly close it and place it on your bedside table because reading manga isn’t weird before coming back to you, in the chair, and like picking you up to put you in bed

now you AWAKEN AND YOU ARE A L E R T because it hits you pretty fast that shinsou is here, this is NOT a dream, he probably saw your manga/anime, and now hates you and is carrying you to your death

this is all false

in the midst of your panic, you knock the both of you down onto the ground, and he’s feels so bad for allowing the two of you to fall nkjasdjakn poor bb

“Y/N im so sorry-”

“hitoshi why are you apologizing?”

he just ignores that and he comes over to you on the floor but your gaze is on the closed computer on your desk or the manga that was placed on your bedside table that you DEFINITELY DID NOT PUT THERE

he saw, he definitely saw, and now you are babbling about how weird he must think you are because of those JERKS who made you think anime and manga are weird

“what are you talking about?”

“well, people always told me how weird it was and sometimes they would... say things”

shinsou quickly realizes you were bullied because you liked manga and anime and stuff like that and now he is contemplating murder <3 what a lovely boyfriend

as someone who has experience with bullying himself, he finds this especially stupid, its literally just a show and book, and kinda wants to ask you the names of the people who told you these things so he can hunt them d o w n

instead shinsou prioritizes you and your insecurities first, “babe... no. its just anime? there’s no problem with watching it. whoever told you that was just a jerk.” jk he uses more colorful vocabulary

shinsou is completely ready to spend the next hour convincing you that there is nothing to worry about because there really isn’t 

“so you don’t think its weird?” his heart almost breaks when he hears your voice and he just nods and gives you a lil smile

“not at all... actually i was wondering what was so interesting that you stayed up until” he’s looking at the time, “2AM.”

now you’re blushing but you still launch into an explanation of the entire anime and honestly anime/manga plots are so extensive and cool and well done and that just makes them so fun and complicated to explain

shinsou is trying his hardest to understand but you are very cute as you explain using lots of vivid hand gestures and adorable faces and wow he’s been distracted

will try his hardest to understand so that you can talk with him about it more often, genuinely finds it great watching you tell him about something you enjoy so much and hates that you felt the need to keep it a secret

he wonders how many times you hid away the manga or anime when he came over and feels like an inconvenience 

anyways he really really really likes you so now he just listens as you rant about how cute certain characters are and lowkey gets jealous

“WHY IS HE SO HOT.”

“he’s not... that hot.” grumbling and stuff as he plays with the edge of his sleeve and borderline glares at the screen.

A/N: i hope this wasn’t bad akshfjakshdkjh 

[xeo-kunsatan]

Dissatisfied One shot +14 (Part 1)

Warning

This story contains sexual themes, Domestic abuse themes, Toxic relationships, Suicide, cigarettes use, bad words and prostitution references. If you are sensitive or underage please don't read this story.

Dissatisfied.... i don't think it's difficult to found out why do i feel like that..

I wasn't always being the inappropriate whore my grandmother or even my uncle used to call me.. I was supposed to be a innocent child.. tsk yeah.. an innocent child with the shitty luck of having such a shattered family and a stupid child with the shitty luck of having a pedophile as teacher who tried to rape him when the bastard child was just 10.

It's alright.. I guess.. I just woke up in the bed from one of my classmates, let's say he wanted a fun night so I accepted to gave him pleasure.. at least he paid me money so I can leave this room, .. but that didn't satisfied me.. nor even filled me.

I taked my stuff making sure he didn't woke up too but he still..

Rocky: Hey Bunny~, are you leaving to soon?~.

Bradley: Are you Horny again? we did it for almost 2 hours the last night, if you want to continue you most pay again.

Rocky: I have not enough money

Bradley: *change on his clothes* Then I have nothing to do here

Rocky: Tsk, you lost...

Bradley: Lost what? *Sarcastic Chuckle* Your "Buddy" is just bigger than mine, is not the big thing..

Rocky: *chuckles* As if you were that hot~.

Bradley: *takes his backpack* You didn't said that that night.

I left that room, that guy seemed mad by my comment, I can't help it, they still see me as the bastard son of the fire ghost which mess with their city but they actually desires me to gives them the pleasure that a girl or anyone else can't gave them..

I was walking through the hallways, then suddenly someone touched my hand to catch my attention, it was that big blue guy who uses to play American football, another client more.

Bradley: Unwin? Are you sure about this? You didn't had a girlfriend?

Unwin: Well yes.. i have a girlfriend, she asked me to do it one day but I'm not ready to do it nor even i have no idea about how to do it.

Bradley: so.. your first Time?

Unwin: Yep..

Bradley: alright.. we will do it this night, don't forget you have to pay for the fun night, i will teach you how to do it.

Unwin: Ok.. thanks man, Heheh now I see why people calls you Bunny, and not just for being little~ *leaves quickly while he was laughing at Bradley* Slut~.

Bradley: But Rabbits are cute...

After that I went to the school restrooms to take a quick bath to at least go to classes without any boy smell.

Since when i thought that this shit was a good idea?.. why did i thought that this would make me feel complete or even satisfied? I questioned myself while the shower drops were falling on my face.

I have a lot of missed calls from my uncle who is surely mad instead of worried by not arriving at the round house.

I dried myself quickly to then change my clothing and go to classes in time, at my seat I saw him.. Skeebo, after that day it's not the same being next to him. He used to bully me by the same old shit as the others but he stopped since that day I saved his life and i snapped to that lemon head which calls himself hero for a nonsense reason.

If you are asking why the heck I was selling my body like this if I have a traumatic event related with this?

I will answer your question, hate me or not depends of you, I will explain.

First my uncle is a hypocritical stingy, he will not give me any fucking money not even for a candy, he just gives money to my cousin, understandable, and the stupid lemon for his mediocre work.

The second reason... Everything happened in a normal school day (yes, after I got Skeebo's respect), also a normal day of ghost attack, there was a new ghost around the netherworld, this one has a weird power which makes everyone Who touches him or is slimed by him, that person ends into a lust state, it was easy to recognize when he attacked someone...at least for me, he has peculiar smell to Cherries, Strawberries and... saliva.

I didn't had to hide, the ghosts didn't attacked me as always, that lemon ball was around eating them and burping their eyes. That clumsy Pac crashed against me and suddenly Skeebo which was running away locking us in a locker by accident.

Bradley: shit...

Skeebo: Arghh!.. that lemon head!!...

Bradley: *sighs*....

Skeebo: are we in a girl's locker?.. this place smells good~

Bradley:*sniffs*... Oh.. shit.. we are not in a girl's locker...It's my locker....

Skeebo:*sniffs on Bradley's hair* is it you? You smell so good~

Bradley: Well my perfume used to be from my older sister, and i use Pactene Shampoo because my uncle has lots of them for my cousin and me, so it has sense.

Skeebo: It's still so good~

Bradley: fuck fuck fuck fuck... Skeebo.. you were infected by a lust ghost.. and you will not snap from that state until you....

Skeebo: me what?~

Bradley:... *Sighs* i-i.. I'm still scared for t-this... But.. just do it with me... D-d-dont worry.. you will not remember any of this moments...

Skeebo: you're so cute~ you're so sweet~..

Bradley: Ok i think he lost the control short time ago..damn it..

Then Skeebo slowly was ripping off my virginity.. I thought it would hurt as when that awful man tried to do to me.. but... This time.. I felt different.. I felt.. strange... i was embarrassed.. it hurted but I liked it..I don't know how nor why...He where keep going for 1 hour until he ended inside me.. for me it was difficult to still up but that feeling was too difficult to describe... Did I feel satisfaction?.. is this what am I looking for to feel full, did I feel good for at least one time of my life, he finally snapped out that state he didn't understand what happened and suddenly the locker door opened, I was a little naked so I acted quickly and transformed myself into a rabbit to escape from a already embarrassing moment leaving him with the shame. Because of me everyone saw Skeebo half-naked and stained in with his own fluids.

Ms Globular: Mr Spheros.. Mr Skeebo! Wake up!

Bradley: Huh!?...

Skeebo: What!?

Almost Everyone laugh about that.. specially to Skeebo

Ms Globular: Please focus yourself in the exam.

Bradley:..*sighs* yes Ms Globular..

Rocky: what's wrong Skeebo aren't you playing with your "buddy" again?

Izod: Yeah, please don't splash us~

Skeebo: *blushed and mad* you 2 shut up!

Yep... also that day was even worst for Skeebo than the day became into Heebo-Skeebo, he was even a bigger mock for almost all the students, it was my fault by running away as a coward..

Izod: Or what?

Bradley: Do you have any idea about how pathetic you look making fun with a guy because of an embarrassing moment he clearly wants to forget?

Rocky: You have no rights to speak slut!

Skeebo: Don't call him slut!

Izod: Aww the Sper-Man is defending the Play-Bun?.

Bradley: So sad that the sizes of your "Buddies" are not that good enough to compensate your lack of brain..

Ms Globular: That's enough you 4!! If you don't quit speaking that dirty stuff in the class i will send you to detention!

Izod/Rocky: Fine Ms Globular..

Bradley: Alright Ms...

Skeebo: *sighs*

The School Bell rings

It was now lunch time, i wasn't hungry so i left to the school yard to smoke a cigarette, a cherry one, I'm allergic to the normals.

Bradley: *sighs*

"Can i sit with you?" - a voice sounded..

It was Lexy Soto, one of my classmates and the most popular in the school for being so kind with all and bringing desserts from his Dad's restaurant also one of the most famous restaurants in Pacopolis), for it Lexy is really respected and beloved here, especially for that Lemon Ball.

Lexy always left a single meal for me and comes to me to give me company, it's still incredible that he is my friend without caring about my Dad's actions, did Latins are like this?

Bradley: Sure Lexy.

Lexy: Good, *sits to him* i noticed that you weren't in the Cafeteria so i left this cupcake for you.

Bradley: Thanks Lexy, you don't had to do it.

Lexy: I have to, Weon

Bradley:*smiles a little and takes the cupcake* Thanks Lexy, *bites it* Hmm~ is so sweet and soft.

Lexy: Chocolate with raspberry cream.

Bradley: Also.. let me guess, did you put ice cream for the cream?

Lexy: You got me.

Bradley: I knew it!

Lexy: *giggles*... *Starts sniffing Bradley* where selling your body again!?.

Bradley: Oh shit.. you got me

Lexy: Bradley, please you don't have to do it..

Bradley: Lexy, i don't have money to buy any stuff i need, and my uncle doesn't give me a shit.

Lexy: And i thought that presidents in Latin America are awful.. but please... You don't have to do it if you don't like it..

Bradley: That's the problem Lexy.. I think like it..but I hate to do it with that bastards.

Lexy: How you can like that awfull thing?...

Bradley: Because I'm sick Lexy..I know i am sick...but i can't cry for help.. because my uncle will not understand..

Lexy: I could ask my Dad to help you but.. i don't want to bother him...

Bradley: *pets him*... Lexy.. you don't have to do it... Maybe i could be sick.. but i will be okay.

Lexy: *starts sobbing* You're lying!... You are not okay! You said that you would be okay but that's not true.. i know you are suffering.. and it... It worries me a lot!! *Cries*

Bradley:...it's because that awful neighbor did to you, right?

Lexy: !!..

Bradley:*hugs Lexy* I'm sorry... I didn't mean to worry you like this.. maybe it would hurt but.. If something happens to me.. i already have a place in the netherworld with my Dad..

Lexy: If Pacopolis were your home too...

Bradley: Even if i live in netherworld, we would still be friends.

Lexy: At least.. please found a solution...

Bradley: I promise I will try.. *dries Lexy's tears* cheer up BerryPie.

Lexy: you most be the one who most smile first Cabro Culiao!..

Bradley: Heh..*smiles* sorry, like this?

Lexy: *cheers* much better~

6:00 pm

The school And clubs activities ended, Lexy have left to his home early to help out his father with his job as always, it was getting late and time to start my job with that moron, so i left the reading club (Club Wich has a single one member, me) to meet up with that guy i just forgot his name and i don't give a care in remember it.

Unwin: Finally..

Bradley: we will do this quickly, i have to go back to the round house.. i have piano practice at 8:00 pm.

Unwin: All you have to do is please me..

Bradley: just if you pay the price, if you don't i will make sure one of my boys to torment you, got it?

Unwin:*sighs* fine!..*pays him 10 Pac Dollars*

Bradley: Good Boy~.

And well i did it with him as i did with the rest of the boys from Maze High (Except by Pac and Spiral, dude i have my limits, i can't leave that stinky lemon to touch me, and Spiral, i know he likes Pacster since long, it's kinda obvious and i prefer them to have that experience by theirselfs) but ..i didn't felt nothing similar to that curious feeling i felt with him.. it wasn't the same.. but it wasn't possible.. even after he ended as a mock because of me.. i would not be able to stand the guilt...

7:00 pm

By finishing, i just put in my clothing to take my stuff and left the dorms, it was almond late for my classes and even worst i was having a lot of walking problems, fortunately or well.. unfortunately my uncle's limousine arrived next to me And taked me to the round house, the bodyguards didn't looked at me in any moment.. it was uncomfortable.. when we arrived to the round house, there was my uncle waiting for me, he seemed completely mad.

Bradley: *sighs*..

Stratos: Bradley..Where the heck you have been!? Why you didn't come back to home yesterday!? Or not even answered my calls!!??... And ugh!.. what's that awful smell!!??

Bradley: Do you care?.

Stratos: wait.. don't tell me you where sleeping with a guy!!?

Bradley: So what!?, If i was sleeping with someone or i was making out with someone, that's not of your business!!

Stratos: of course it's my business to take care of you!

Bradley: As it was your business to take care of my dad when he needed you more than anything... You cared so much of me that you left me with grandmother!

Stratos: It wasn't that bad!

Bradley: That Bad...It wasn't..That Bad!? I was her fucking Boxing bag and used me to turn off her cigarettes

Stratos: You are exaggerating, she was educating you to be a disciplined and decent man!.

Bradley: So sad, it didn't work..

Stratos: It was for you could not end like your father.

Bradley: Should I'll remember you the boiling water cup she threw me in that Barbecue in the round house by "Accident?

Stratos: Agh just go inside and take a bath right now!.. don't let Cedrick see you!.

Bradley: Whatever...

Yep the same old shit of always... I taked another bath and went to my room, i was so tired, Quartzy was sleeping on my lap to comfort me.. but i still had to play that piano.. so i get up to go to the piano room.. my Uncle wasn't there... that was a good thing, that means he would not bother me.

So i sat in that sit and taked a cherry cigarette from a box i use to hide from my uncle and cousin.

I smoke one of them while I was playing a soft melody in the piano..I was losing myself in my thoughts and the music.. then suddenly someone entered in.

Cedrick: Hey Brad!

Bradley:*throws the cigarette through the window* Oh, hi Cedrick

Cedrick: what where you eating?...

Bradley: oh, it was nothing.

Cedrick: Oke, can I stay with you? I love how you play the piano :D.

Bradley: Alright little bud.

So I played a melodies for my little cousin, I didn't wanted him to see me like this..

I'm at least a little alright if my cousins, my people, my sister, Buttler and my Dad are alright too.. maybe.

Lately when I was close to Skeebo I was feeling something unusual.. like a hungry.. hungry for his virility, hungry for his touch.. I sounded like a monster... I'm sorry..

Suddenly i felt that someone was calling me.

[maldito-arbol]

CMTO Ch.2 Mar Mar

First of all fuck you for that title I hate u so much how could u fucking to this to me I am going to die

‘—Marcy was not entirely unconscious.’ (MARCY OH NO )

You kept me alive (*sobs*)

The sound of a spine being snapped under the weight of pink is an afterthought, (as it should be)

as is Andrias’s final call of, “Heart, Heart, why have you abandoned me? I promise I still love you.” (Screaming crying sobbing WHAT THE FUCK-)

“And don’t you dare trust Strength while I’m gone, you hear? Keep an eye on that little bastard. Don’t forget what it did to us.”

“I never did, Heart.” (HELLO???)

‘as though a piece of her brain’s been lobotomized,’ (omg yay more reasons to relate to Marcy <3)

Things like, “you’re safe now, little one, back in my arms, and I’ll never let you go again. I’ll watch over you this time.” (Hhhhhm I’m love,,,, they care about eachother so MUCH,,,,,,)

Oh I LOVE a good callback,,,,,,, hell yeah

“There are a couple things different that she takes note of—first of all, it’s humid here. Normally, the air would be dry and arid as can be, just the kind of atmosphere that would call for a glass of water. But right now, it feels as though there’s a blanket of water vapor over her.” (Oh it’s HUMID there’s WATER in the AIR! This is such a dumb detail for me to get this excited about but it’s so CLEVER)

(If Witney loves Heart as much as she claims to, why did she block them out?)

(WAIT “STOLEN” AS IN RIPPED OUT IF THEIR VESSELS??? IS THAT WHY HEART AND ANDRIAS WERE SEPERATED???? BECAUSE STRENGTH RIPPED THEM OUT AND STOLE THEM FROM ANDRIAS????)

“You should check Heart’s” “It’s green down there,” she reports. (Wow Marcy, incredible observational skills. Great job 10/10)

“Would that not make sense? An ache in your head for a loss of a piece of it.” (I mean sometimes I guess)

“Um, well, this is definitely more of a personal question,” Marcy prefaces. “I noticed that when you were talking about holding hands, you referred to yourselves as ‘the four of us’. And y’know, I figured,” she scratches the back of her head. “The first three would be you, Heart, and Strength. But…who’s number four?”

Witney spins madly. “Pass.” 

Marcy winces. “Sorry. That have something to do with the past you don’t want to talk about?”

“Yes.” (Well fuck. I was so sure I was right with the four but if Witney doesn’t want to answer that question. Oh no, it could still be about the two and their old vessels. I’m def less sure now but I still think I’m right)

“You’re damaged,” she murmurs softly. 

“A little,” Witney agrees. “It is nothing when compared to Heart, however.”

“Heart’s cracked too?” 

“Very,” she affirms. “It is hard to see if you are not looking closely, but I am always looking closely.”

“What about Strength?” She somehow doubts her gem will be happy to answer. 

“Unlikely,” she grumbles. “Unless your Sasha makes a habit of knocking it around.” (Oh I picked up on that implications STRAIGHT AWAY. Okay umz yeah okay fuck. Shit. So many thoughts yet so little coherency)(“but I am always looking closely” Witney wtf this dynamic between u and Heart is, interesting I guess. I don’t know what word I’m liking for but they dynamic certainly Is)

“Why are you crying?” (‘WHY ARE YOU CRYING?’ I fucking- I found the fucking line- “why are you crying” I DONT KNOW MAL WHY THE FUCK AM I CRYING TAKE A WILD FUCKING GUESS)

“You are…gentle,” Witney tells her, softer than a whisper. “I did not know anyone could touch so lightly in their dreams.” (‘I didn’t know you could be gentile in dreams’ Witney noooo,,,,, SHES SO SAD WITNEY I LOVE YOU YOU DESERVE SO MUCH BETTER- who did this to her I’m gonna kill them-)

“ Are we people?” 

The question strikes her like a crack of lightning. A question Witney has to ask, one she doesn’t know the answer to, is this . (Screaming crying sobbing crying,,,,, Witney,,,,,, Marcy is so fucking right these casual lines from Witney are desvistating)

How the FUCK did I get half way thru the next paragraph before realising it said Keeper Of The Box- wait was WITNEY the old Keeper of the Box????? Also fun fact I literally threw my phone when it clicked multiple times at my bed as hard as I could, do with that reaction what you will

BARREL??? Oh of course Wit was the first to have a vessel, she has had the most out of the three, but Barrel still would have been at the same time as the other two would he not? Which doesn’t make it any better honestly. If Barrel is the bitch ass who hurt Witney I’m gonna fucking kill him

“You want one Mar Mar?” (Sash What The Fuck. What is wrong with you why do you keep saying these things)(I feel like I may have mis interpreted what was being said in hindsight but, still um Sash what the fuck)

she wouldn’t mind the idea. “Ooh. I’d get to wear a suit.” Actually, maybe she likes the idea. (Omg Gender?)

“You might need that monocle,” again, Sash what

“It says, ‘the answer to that will not benefit you, for she no longer exists’…whatever the hell that means.”(agshfjahag is this what u meant when u just avoided saying Froogs Name indefinitely. I know it makes sense character wise and shit but it just reads so funny)

OTHER HUMAN VESSELS????? What

“The death of the heart,”

A final home for a gem of blue…

(HELLO???? Brain stop getting hung up on the fact that Heart isn’t capitalised it doesn’t matter this is Big Shit What What What. WHAT THE FUCK DOES THE CORE HAVE TO DOWNITH HEART WHAT THE FUCK HUH)

(How many. If the box left Amphibia a thousand years ago. How many of Wits vessels did Andrias kill. How quickly did he do it. Bro…… and why did he keep the bodies like dude that’s a little creepy, at least they got coffins..?)

Yet another dead end for a gem of green… (…)(screaming crying sobbing fuck why do other people have to be home I just wanna Scream)

 

“Andrias woke up.” (WHAT HOW???)

What?!

“This early? He was down bad.”

Sasha shakes her head. “He’s a sturdy bastard.”(SASHA U SHATTERED HIS FUCKING SPINE HE SHOULD BE LUCKY TO BE ALIVE)

Sash is giving me *terrible* vibes. Since the start it this chapter really. This does Not seem to be going well. And wrecker the Fuck she’s doing with Andrias is just even worse. Bro what the fuck is this. Sasha what

“Just that my gem’s been screaming at me to kill you for the past few minutes, and it just now went quiet.”(….huh um. U know could just be me. But the implication that Sash yelling at Marcy and kicking her out placated Strengths lust for Andrias To Fucking Die Already, nooot painting a very good picture of I do say so myself. Not, not very good, terrible vibes rn.)

AWW THE LITTLE SMILE,,,,,

Plus bonus second read comment:

“Letting him touch her gently” FUCK OFF NO FUCK YOU FUCK OFF NO. No,,.,, no cuz Witney DIDNT get that, fuck, no,,,, please,,,,, hnnnnnnnn

SO GLAD I revealed the title theme so early on, now I can torment u guys within the first five seconds of opening the chapter <3

Rip Marcy hope she’s doing alright lmao

Remember how Marcy and Witney’s relationship went from “is my life all you care about??” to “you kept me alive <3” man good times

HAHAHAHA OH YEAH SEE I WASNT SURE IF I WANTED TO KEEP THAT LINE IN THE FIRST PLACE, but I was like “it couldn’t hurt to have more Pain <3” man can u imagine being Heart and hearing that while you’re desperately struggling to keep your current vessel alive? Hearing it from the one you spent a thousand years trying to return to, the one you loved, the one who now carelessly beat and stabbed the new vessel you’ve grown so attached to. It is such a HUGE betrayal Andrias doesn’t even know he’s committed, and it’s made worse by the fact that he seems to blame it on Heart even in his final moments. Absolutely devastating Godammit getting emotional about Heart now when will it stop

Don’t forget what Strength did to us so true <3 yeah I’d like to formally apologize for this Witney/Heart dynamic they’re so TOXIC and yet they also have a sense of solidarity with one another because they have SHARED TRAUMA :) absolutely terrible folks we hate to see it

ANOTHEF REASON TO RELATE TO MARCY SNANWWMWKQI DUCK

They care each other sm 🥺

Oh THAT ONE was fun. Tell her off Olivia <3

YEAH ITS HUMID ISNT THAT GREAT i absolutely hate humidity i Do Not envy Marcy for a second but yeah i just thought it’d be a cool detail to add :3 since they’re not being violently mashed together they simply have slightly invaded the elemental space within each other’s dreamscape.

I’m SO sorry to inform u of this but Witney’s also fucking terrified of Heart and there’s still that bitterness in her mixed with the love she has for them. The “i want us to be together but you also make me wanna crawl out of my skin!” Love is what Witney likes to present on the surface while the fear is something she tries desperately to bury inside of her to no avail. The duality of Witney….YEAH WE’RE GONNA DISCUSS THE ORIGIN OF THAT IN THE BACKSTORY HAHA!!

:) Strength….what did u do

Strength: OH GREAT NOW YOURE BLAMING ME TOO I DID NOTHING WRONG!! NOTHING!!!

Hm okay yeah sure

It’s gween down there gween is not a creative color

I meant to talk more about Marcy’s headaches but I suppose they’ll have to wait for chapter 4. Yeah uh hey remember how she only has one eye? And how her head was the prominent source of pain when she shared Witney with Heart? Marcy probably gets migraines like there’s no tomorrow now.

Hahahaha I knew u were gonna have a crisis about that line. Yeah I’m still not telling you <3

Their dynamic is FUN, because it’s not just the thing with Strength, there’s MORE to their trauma and the parallels between them (they understand each other so much better than Strength does oops). Actually I’m surprised nobody’s out here wondering when in the fuck Witney got the chance to even look at Heart in the first place if they can’t invade each other’s dreamscapes without their vessels. Nobody? Hah alright :)

Awwwwww are u crying <3 good. Watching ur reactions to all these Witney reveals brings me great joy.

I guess you could say…Witney was the First Keeper of the Box……DONT THROW UR PHONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD—

Like I said iCANTWAITTOTALKABOUTBARREL OH MY GOD!!! But not now. In good time my friend….

“U want a Midwife Marcy?” No. No I agree it’s a HORRIBLE joke to make in the same vein as the “I’m guessing Andrias’s sleeping quarters are off the table” like sasharcy’s jokey light-hearted dynamic really coming to bite them in the ass no u CANT joke about Marcy’s trauma Sash, no you CANT make comments like that now that ur Queen Sasha stop— see it’s the little things that amp up the tension between them and oooh that’s gonna catch up with them real fucking fast.

GENDER!!!!

This one is Less Bad but it’s not helped by the fact that Sasha’s been cracking fucked up jokes already so it could easily be taken the wrong way.

I love how you find this funny it’s not funny in the slightest. *takes out an eraser that says ‘For really LITTLE mistakes’* wait Froog why are you running wait—

Other Human Vessels~~~~~~~~~ woooooooooooo I once again forgot you guys didn’t know this before YES where do you think Heart’s other vessels came from :^)

“For the record, I am sorry,” Wit tells her. “Over the years I’ve gotten wise. I’ve gotten wise enough to realize I can fight Strength all I want, but I will never be able to stand up to Heart. To think your Anne managed to do so is…incredible. After seeing so many of their vessels fail before, I was expecting the worst. It is so easy to be consumed by the darkness—and Heart has come to crave it. You’ll never see horrors as magnificent as theirs.”

I LOVE that you noticed ‘heart’ isn’t capitalized hehehehehehehehehehehe but what DOES Heart have to do with the core I wonderrrrr

This is one question I kind of know the answer to and yet kind of don’t. In canon the eyeball door has 8 heads in its circle, and the very First shot of the crypt shows 8 visible coffins, so the logical answer would be 8.

Whether or not I decide to go with that number is anyone’s guess, but it’s a good estimate! Considering the timeframe between when Andrias started collecting Wit vessels and when Heart was stolen (it’s. not as long as you think.). Why did he keep the bodies? I think he started off by keeping the first for personal reasons and then just….kept doing it. Disturbing I know right

I have been WAITING to go OFF about how much of a Dick Move those first lines of each gem riddle are, and you FINALLY have the context for Witney’s my god. It’s so horrible, yeah. Andrias you’re such a bitch leave her alone. Leave ALL of them alone actually—

Yeah fuck Andrias for Waking Up to begin with, but I needed him to torment sasharcy some more <3

Sasha’s vibes ARE Off and it’s so unbelievably exciting for me that she’s getting progressively worse with every chapter because I get to write in her POV in chapter 4 and who knows how unhinged that entire chapter is gonna be. Insane. Beware the Queen! Something is wrong…

Oh THAT line hahah…yeah unfortunately that Is Not the reason Strength went quiet but I can’t get into it rn lmao the important thing is Strength is fucking PISSED Andrias survived that attack and moreso that Sasha purposely left him alive. They were supposed to kill him. Supposed to.

Anne smiling at Marcy in her sleep watered my crops I had to do it. Makes the “But how is she supposed to smile in these conditions?” line hurt more.

Absolutely disturbing to me that Andrias knows how to touch gently because of course he does. It’s great for emotional manipulation!

Hehehe can’t wait to go thru the rest of this stuff, my lovely followers be prepared for a spam <3

[turning-dreams-into-chaos]

Love Potion

Request: can i request some angst for younger remus where it's a couple days after the full moon and he looks for the reader so they can cuddle (they're already dating) and he finds them kissing another guy, and he asks reader why and the readers like "i dont want you anymore, i love this guy, blah blah blah" and he's heart broken but later somehow reader's friend finds out the guy gave them a love potion and fixes it, and reader has to try to explain to Remus that it's what happened but he doesn't believe her, and it's all angsty because he's mad at her but in the end he understands or something like that, and i am SO sorry that this is so long, and i love love love your writing

Requested by: Anon

Paring: Remus Lupin x Reader

Word Count: 3.3K

~Master list-

Remus was exhausted. Another full moon a few days ago wore the boy down. His body ached and all he wanted to do was relax and stop moving and making his newest scars hurt more. Remus knew after a full moon as restless as the last one, there was only one thing that would make him feel better.

You.

You’ve been dating for a little over a year now and knew all about Remus’ lycanthropy. You wanted to help him any way you could, offering to become an Animagus just to protect Remus, but Remus refused to allow you to do that, not wanting you to even get the chance to be hurt, much less by him. So instead you settled on middle ground. Whenever Remus needed it, full moon or not, you were always down for cuddles. It didn’t really seem much like middle ground considering the fact how much you both loved cuddling with each other and just being in each other’s arms. You’d always run your fingers through Remus’ fluffy hair, gently scrapping your nails against his scalp as he held you close to his chest. There was no doubt in his mind that it was his favorite part of the day.

He packed up all his books and papers in the library, his work long forgotten since you had been on his mind for the last 20 minutes. His friends knew the look in his eyes as they watched him gather his things, bidding them goodbye before he was gone. His first stop was the Gryffindor common room, assuming you were probably with Lily.

“Evans!” Remus called out to the red head as she started to make her way upstairs. Lily turned around, sharing a smile with her friend. “Is Y/N up there?”

Lily shook her head at his question. “No? She ran out almost an hour ago, looking for too giddy for her normal self so I figured she was looking for you, ready for your cuddles.” She giggled softly, remembering the way you skipped out of the common room. Her giggles ceased when she realized Remus was your destination. “What she didn’t go to you?”

Remus furrowed his brows and put his hands on his hips. “No, I haven’t seen her since last lessons.”

“Want me to help look for her?” Lily offered but Remus turned her down.

“It’s fine, I’m sure she just went for a walk.” Remus hid a whimper as Lily patted his shoulder in good luck before she finished her voyage upstairs. As soon as she was gone, Remus went up to his room and threw his things on his bed, pulling out the map his friend and he enchanted and started looking for your name. It didn’t take long before he found you, your name floating in the astronomy tower next to some kid name Jordan Adams. “Jordan Adams?” Remus whispered to himself as he tried to think of who this kid was and why his girlfriend was so ‘giddy’ to see him.

Remus didn’t know much about him, knowing he was a Gryffindor in the same year as you and him and vaguely remember you complaining about being partners with him last year on a project in Transformation. A project Adams used as an opportunity to repeatedly ask you out. Sure, this was before you and Remus were dating, but what were you doing with him now?

Remus didn’t waste anytime to head to the top of the tower, the pathway thankfully secluded before he reached the top. But then he saw the last thing he ever wanted to see.

You and this Adams kid lip locked, no space between you as his arm was thrown around your waist.

“Y/N?” Remus’ shattered voice caused you and Jordan to separate, your head snapping around to look at Remus. Jordan’s eyes went wide, wiping your smeared lipstick off his lips which only made Remus more upset. “What the hell is this? You’re cheating on me?” He blurted out, watching you stand up and head his way. He didn’t want to look at you, your calm expression making him sick to his stomach. With everything you and Remus went through he never thought you’d cheat on him.

“Remus, I love him.”

And just like that the anger disappeared from Remus’ body, replaced with a numbness as he stared at you. “W-what?”

“I love him.” You repeated, looking back at Jordan with a smile once only reserved for Remus. You loved him? You loved him? You were the only person Remus ever said those words too, and for you it was the same. But now you just said those words about a completely different boy. “We’re over Remus. I don’t want you anymore. Jordan’s my boyfriend now.” You batted your eyelashes at Remus as if you hadn’t just ripped out his heart and stomped it into the ground.

“I-I don’t understand. What happened- Why are you”

You let out a loud annoyed groan, rolling your eyes at Remus before grabbing Jordan’s hand. “Don’t let this be harder than it has to be. I just realized Jordan’s perfect for me. I mean isn’t he just dreamy?” You clutched onto his arm, fawning over the boy before turning his head to land a sloppy kiss on his mouth.

Remus had seen enough. He ran out of the tower, right out of the school and straight into the forbidden forest. His eyes were prodding with tears he finally let fall as he dropped to the ground, slamming his fist onto the forest floor and screaming out his pain. He’s been in physical pain before during and after a transformation, emotional too, like experiencing his parent’s reactions after he was infected, but in this moment all he could feel was the way he couldn’t breathe. His throat closed up as he sobbed in the woods, his walls breaking as the image of you pulling Adams’ face to yours played on repeat in his brain.

His heart was broken, and he couldn’t handle it.

A first year Hufflepuff saw Remus run into the woods, the cries of the much older boy catching his attention before he disappeared in the tree line. He was the one who told James, Sirius, and Peter where the fourth member of their friend group was. The boys took off immediately to find Remus, unsure of what happened in the last hour since they watched him leave the library.

Remus was no longer crying when his friends found him a while later, deep in the forest and propped up against a tree. His cheeks were wet, and all emotion was drained from his face when the boys stopped. “Moony? Moony, mate, are you okay?” James whispered softly as he and Sirius squatted on both sides of him, sharing concerned looks when Remus showed no sign of a response.

“Remus?” Sirius tried this time, putting a hand on the boy’s shoulder. Remus’ head slowly turned to look at him, his eyes bloodshot and looking as if he just realized he had company. Sirius hesitated momentarily before standing up, grabbing Remus’ arm and gently pulling him to his feet. “Let’s get you out of here.” He spoke in a quiet tone, worried the raise in voice wouldn’t be good. Remus allowed the three of them to bring him to his room, trying to pass the common room as quickly as possible to hide Remus’ condition from the rest of the school.

They placed him on his bed, Remus curled into his covers and brought his pillow against his chest, holding it much like he would hold you. The boys didn’t leave him, each of them climbing onto the bed, making sure not to disturb Remus’ position. “Are we going to talk about it?” Sirius asked, unsure how to directly address this. James, the only other person in their foursome with a girlfriend, knew what ever was going on with Remus was related to you. No one break downs like this unless it was over someone they love.

“Take your time, Moony. We’re here when you need to talk.” James said as he patted Remus’ arm, feeling the boy stiffen under his touch before a quiet sob went through his body and his eyes clasped shut.

“She cheated on me.”

They were sure they misheard him. There was no way you, who they knew love Remus more than anyone else, would cheat on him. “Remus-“

“I caught her kissing Jordan Adams! She said she loved him!” He cried out, wetting the pillow when he held it against his face. He wasn’t embarrassed to cry in front them, they were practically his brothers. He was embarrassed that he imagined a future with you, you who just broke his heart and only made Remus believe more that no one could ever love a monster like him.

Remus cried for more hours than he’d like to admit, his friends staying by his side until he ran out of tears. Lily stopped by earlier as well, confused as to why she just saw her best friend with someone who most definitely wasn’t her boyfriend.

They took shifts once dinner started, Peter watching over Remus while Sirius and James got something to eat, hurrying up in order to get back to Remus. The first thing they saw when they entered the great hall though was you, clinging onto Adam’s arm much like you had when you were in front of Remus. If they didn’t believe Remus earlier, they definitely would’ve now. They shot you a glare as they walked by, choosing to sit at the other side of the Gryffindor table. They spoke in hushed voices, refusing to look at you as Lily rushed to the table.

“We have a problem.” She told the two boys, sitting in the spot next to her boyfriend.

“Yeah, Miss liar over there.” Sirius grumbled, nudging his head in your direction before stabbing the food on his plate.

“Exactly.” She placed a box of chocolate on the table, picking out a piece and holding it up. “James, take a good sniff and tell me what you smell.”

James raised a brow at her, confused what she was getting at as Lily shot him a look and he complied, taking a deep sniff of the chocolate in her hand. “I can’t smell anything, your perfume’s too strong. Are you wearing the whole bottle?” He asked, taking another whiff and mentally enjoying the smell of Lily wearing the perfume he bought her at Hogsmeade.

“I’m not wearing any perfume today! That’s my point!” She exclaimed, only making James jump before both boys waited for her to explain. “When I smell this, all I can smell is your shampoo.” James flushed red as Lily put the candy back in the box, wiping the slightly melted chocolate of her hand and onto her napkin.

“What are you getting at Lils?” Sirius asked, shoveling another bite of his food into his mouth.

“I found this box on Y/N’s bed this afternoon. She only ate a few pieces before leaving.”

“So?” James scoffed, annoyed at the mention of you.

“So? How daft are you?!” Neither boy said anything, still very confused as to what Lily was trying to point out. She groaned, throwing her hands into the air. “It’s a love potion! Adams gave Y/N a love potion!”

Both boys’ face dropped, pieces of the puzzle slowly falling together. “She’s under a spell?” Lily nodded slowly. “She’s not really in love with him?”

“Are you kidding? Look at them.” They looked down the table, seeing you grabbing onto Adams’ arm and staring adorningly at him, but Adams wouldn’t look at you. Instead he was completely focused on his friends, you were just arm candy, but didn’t seem to mind. “Does that look like love?”

Sirius shook his head in disbelief, thinking about Remus sitting in their room believing you no longer loved him. “Should we tell Remus?”

“No. Not until the potion’s worn off.” Lily shook her head at them.

“How long will that be?”

“A day? At least.” She muttered, trying to recall what she learned in Slughorn’s class. “It’s already been over half that.”

James scowled. “Moony is going to kill Adams.”

“Not unless Y/N does first.”

“What if Adams gives her a second dose before the first wears off?” Lily reminded them as they fell silent. If Adams gave you a second dose before the first wears off then it’s at least another day before you return to your old self.

“What if we get her away from him?” Sirius suggested and went over plans in his head.

“You mean kidnap her?”

“What? No!” Sirius denied James view as James shrugged. “I mean, what if Lily distracts her until she’s back, that way Adams can’t get his grubby hands on her.”

“That could work.” James agreed, turning to Lily. “Could you do that?”

“I think I’m more than capable of getting my best friend to spend time in her room.” The task was easier said than done.

By school rules, you had to sleep in your own bed and Lily thanked every star in the sky that Adams hadn’t pulled something with you being spelled and made you return to your room. You went on for a while talking nonstop about Jordan. It was infuriating for Lily to listen to. She usually didn’t mind hearing about your love life, both of you love sharing with each other before going to sleep, but that was when you were talking about Remus, not some boy who decided to sneak you a love potion.

“Y/N!” Lily groaned, slapping her hand against her pillow and looking over at you in the dark. “Just go to sleep!”

“But we always-“

“Not tonight. Let’s just go to sleep.” She didn’t hear any response from you, sighing in content as she figured you listened to her. She let her eyes close, thankful for the silence as she fell asleep.

She barely got a few hours of sleep before hearing you whisper her name. “Lily?” she grunted, rolling onto her back and rubbing her eyes.

“What?”

“I need to see him.”

She sighed deeply and pulled the blanket tighter against herself. “You can see Adams in the morning. Go back to sleep.”

“No Lily. I need see Remus.” Her eyes snap wide, realizing how your words echoed with tears. She was out of her bed quickly and lighting the room, seeing you perched on your bed with tears in your eyes.

“The potion wore off?” She ask as you nodded, hanging your head low. “Adams must’ve messed up somehow…” She mumbled, letting out a breath of relief before launching herself onto your bed, wrapping her arms around your neck. “Oh, I’m so glad you’re back.”

You hugged her back tight, burying your head into her neck. “Lily I messed up!”

“Why’d you eat the chocolate?!” She yelled at you, separating and pushing the hair out of your tears.

“I thought they were from Remus! They smelt just like him, I thought-“ you stopped yourself, realizing how stupid you were. Lily scrambled out of your bed, jotting something down on a paper. She handed it to your owl and let him out of his cage.

“Take this to Remus.” She told the owl before he flew away.

“He isn’t going to want to see me.” You tried to tell her, but she didn’t listen as she pulled you off your bed and dragged you down to the common room. Remus woke up to the sound of your owl on the window catching his attention, his sniffling filling the room as he wiped his eyes. He furrowed his brows, looking over his still sleeping friends before shuffling out of bed and opening the window. Your owl dropped the message in his hand. His eyes darted over Lily’s vague words.

Common Room. Now.

He didn’t want to go, but if Lily was telling him to, he knew better than to ignore her. He tossed the paper on his bedside, glancing into the mirror to see the mess he looked like before shaking off the vision and heading downstairs.

“Lily?” He called out as he finished the steps, looking around the room before his eyes landed on you, your gaze casted onto the fire as you sat curled up in front of it. “Y/N.” You turned to look at him, looking just as distraught as he did.

“Rem.” You whispered, fresh tears falling down your face at the sight of him. You stood up, taking a step towards Remus as he tried and fail to hide how much he was hurting as he started back up the stairs. “Remus wait!”

“Why?” He spat, his eyes glaring into yours with a fire you’ve never seen before. “I don’t want to hear it. Whatever you have to say, go tell Adams.”

“I don’t love Adams! I don’t even like him!”

“Oh, really? Cause it sure didn’t look that way earlier when your tongue was down his throat!

“I love you!” You screamed at him, sure that every Gryffindor, even the sleeping ones, could hear you. Remus didn’t say anything, watching as you closed your eyes, falling onto the couch behind you. Your voice was softer now, so scared of losing Remus as you looked at him from across the room. “I love you Remus. I’ve always loved you. Adams left chocolate on my bed, I thought they were from you. I didn’t know there was a love potion in them.”

Remus bit his tongue, watching you hug yourself tight shaking your head as your tears hit the carpet. “Why should I believe anything you’re saying right now?”

You shrugged, feeling so defeated. “Because I do love you Remus. It was a love potion; you must believe that. I don’t love anyone but you.” Your voice cracked as Remus broke, slowly making his way over to the couch with you. He didn’t look at you as he sat down and you nodded, reaching over to cup his cheek to get him to look at you. His watery eyes met yours, his breath caught in his throat as your fingers danced over his skin. “For as long as you’ll have me, I’m yours. I promise.” Remus stayed quiet, leaning his forehead against yours.

It was a love potion. He thought. It wasn’t her. She still loves me. She always loved me.

You were about to pull away and grant Remus the space he probably wanted. You knew how upset you’d be if the shoe was on the other foot, but Remus didn’t let you pull away. His lips connected with yours, a kiss much different than the ones Adams stole from you. More tears streamed down your cheeks, wiped away as Remus brought a hand up.

“I believe you.” he whispered, brushing his thumb back and forth across your cheek. You smiled, licking your lips as you fell into his embrace, your body fitting against his perfectly. Remus sighed, letting out a shaky breath when he held you into him. “I love you.” he whispered into your ear, feeling you say it back as your breath tickled his neck. You were both exhausted, the sun not coming up for another or so as Remus laid down on the couch, you still in his embrace laying next to him as you let your hand move into his hair, playing with his curls.

“I’m gonna kill Adams.” You mumbled as Remus raised a brow, nodding his head.

“I’ll help.” You chuckled at him, feeling his laugh rumble in his chest as he pulled you closer to him. It didn’t take long before both you and Remus fell asleep together, your tears long gone. Lily found you an hour later have come down to check on you before seeing you and Remus finally cuddled together. She smiled, leaving you and your boyfriend to get some much-needed rest, vowing to never let you eat random chocolate you find on your bed again. Even if it does smell like your boyfriend.

A/N: Thoughts? 😊 Hope this was what you were hoping for Anon!

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[coureirsix]

tagging @dangerdaysdean because im having thoughts about things (mcrnatural) because on twitter i once again saw the plot to revenge and it has had me THINKING about that other post that also touched the subject but it’s like

i dont know of any other being that would be so openly sadistic so as to “bring me the corpses of a thousand evil men in exchange for the one you love” than chuck. like. it screams like something chuck would do for his own perverse entertainment

so it’s like. it isnt even mark of cain dean, which is somehow worse. but in a direct mirroring to when sam broke down in mystery spot, dean heads off. at some point he ditches the impala because sam keeps finding him that way. 

but i digress the few hundred come and go. dean has to physically present chuck with these bodies, and no, monsters don’t count, dean, so. dean simply has to pray on a corpse of a man guilty of something irredeemable (because, at first, dean would hunt down only men guilty of real horrors. there’s a lot of retrospection at first, at least in relation to what dean deems a “monster” and dean finds himself making more friends that are shifters/vampires/werewolves as a result) and chuck will appear. righteous and high and mighty with a very amused grin and an absolutely patronizing “very good, dean. very good.”

and so dean would continue this. as he goes on, he’d make more moves with demons, rogue angels, and the like. he’d have no shortage of vile men in the US but what would begin to change would be dean’s entire demeanor. he’d learn to spot a man who beat his wife from the way he spoke to the server at a diner. he’d learn to notice the expressions on a child’s face when they were being scolded just a little too harshly in public that would imply other things. dean was already good at being stealthy, it’s just his ability to notice signs of body number #447 and then body #674. And each time, chuck appears standing above dean, giving him this amused and bewildered expression, just to say very softly, “that’s a good boy, dean.”

and after the first few several hundred, after he gets into the last couple hundred he needs. he starts enjoying the praise. it becomes both a thing of the constant memory of cas that haunts him, that drives him to go from city to city, finding ways to make people disappear without anyone noticing. the way dean sees cas in every mirror, in every quick glance as a blurry ghost. both that and the fact that there’s something alluring now, in chuck’s voice, when he crouches down and gives dean a pat on the side of his face and says, “you did very good, dean.” before he disappears. 

so dean ends up with the silver goal of 999 evil men under his belt. he plunges his knife into the last corpse of a man who bragged about going to war and murdering foreign civilians. and this one had been a fight, so dean is lying there, covered in blood and laughing maniacally because he knows this is body #999. he knows after this is just one more and he can finally see cas again. he can do right by the person who’s only ever tried to do right by him and wipe away that debt he’s carried around for so long. and so he looks up at the night sky, eyes pleading despite having been mostly blackened over. his face contorts into a broken expression, because he knows what’s coming and there’s a part of his chest that aches to be told he’s good. but chuck doesn’t appear.

it’s cas. cas, who’s hair is a mess on his head, cas, who’s trenchcoat is dirty, cas, who’s staring down at dean in shock, in disbelief and most of all, in confusion. because cas has been in the empty. cas, who has has been screaming his lungs out in the empty if only to irritate that which he inhabited. cas’ sunken eyes dart around, as if he doesn’t recognize the world around him now. but, he recognizes dean, he’d always recognize dean.

and dean looks up at him, mouth agape in the face of the salvation he’s found. but it’s neither salvation nor righteousness that kneels down in front of him. there’s no telling what cas is thinking. dean watches cas’ hand shake as cas kneels down on the other side of the corpse dean is kneeling at. dean shudders at the touch of cas’ hand when cas reaches up to try and rub at some of the dry blood. the angel’s touch burns. and dean has to reach forward and put his hands on cas’ shoulders. because he’s drowning, suddenly, in nothingness. a wave of nausea comes over him and he leans into cas’ shoulder, dry sobbing because he has cas back. 

he has cas back and cas is staring at him almost like a stranger.

and dean doesn’t feel a thing. 

[fullmoonremus]

Lovers By Chance, Goth By Choice | Snape x OC

{parody fic, based on my immortal :p another thing I found deep in my google drive. thought it deserved to see the light of day. one of my best friends requested this while intoxicated and I just had to write it. don’t take it too seriously lol} 

Warnings: Smexy Themes uwu

Time/Era: Lightning era :)

Word Count: 1.1k shes long ^.^ like snapes dick

Summary: After Arvil Willow Way Urie gets put into detention by Professor Snape, things happen and no one sees it happen </3

Request: Please write a fic where snape kisses me in front Of everyone and doesn’t care who sees. I have like three names and i am GOTH. 

A/N: Rawr i <3 prof snape SM! Thx for the request </3 enjoy babey!!!!! WEEEEEEEE

masterlist

Hi. My name is Avril Willow Way Urie and I am goth, incase you couldn’t tell. I LOVE panic! at the disco, Brendon Urie is basically my husband. I’ not related to him no matter how similar our names are but I really wish we were because hes the sexiest man I have ever seen in my life. Anyway, I have short black hair that is cut uneven because it is CURLY and it doesn’t matter. The uneven cut represents my chaotic emotions. You wouldn’t understand them. I am gothic, and NOT a prep. If you call me a prep I will get very angry and flip you off everytime I see you. I love fishnets, like I am wearing today. Today I am wearing a ripped mayday parade shirt with a skirt that has planets all over them. I wear planets because i like space and i am SMART!!!!!!!!1 I have my big platform boots with ripped red fishnets under them. My eyeliner is smudged all over my eyes from crying. I am EMOTIONAL that is why i am emo. My nails are long and sharp just like draco likes. Did I mention I’m dating draco malfoy? Aka the HOTTEST PERSON ALIVE besides brendon urie. (A/N: If you don’t like panic! You are a PREPZ and I dont lik u)

“Miss. Way-Urie I will not have someone talk to me like this. Detention tonight at 8!” Professor Snape screams at the top of his lungs. 

“Omg wtf??? I’m just talking to my super sexy boyfriend Draco! What are you? Jealous?” I smirk, tucking a jagged piece of hair behind my pierced ears. I have 8 piercings in each ear and my tongue also has a stud in it. 

“HOW DARE YOU SPEAK TO ME LIKE THIS!” Prof snape started crying making his black liquid eyeliner drip down his depressed face. Maybe he was emo like me. Prof are NOT emo tho so idk. My face grew sad and I started crying. This made draco angry. 

Draco was wearing a bleach tie died (A/N: get it? Died because im goffick) MCR shirt and acid washed jeans that were half black and half neon pink. Boyz can wear pink, you kno. It’s ok he’s just very in-touch with his emotions. His hair was pulled into big spikes on top of his head n they were died blue. He wore his red contax which made him luok even more goth.

“DONT SPEAK To MY SUPER SMEXY GIRLFRIEND LIKE THAT YOU TOE!!!!!” DRACO sobs, standing up and pushing me behind him. My big platform leather boots jingled and i almost tripped. 

“DRACO YOU PUSHED ME!” I gasped and started crying harder. Big black striped of makeup stroleld down my face like a galaxy. Im like space remember lol

“I”M SORRY BABY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!” Draco sprinted out of the room but left his chain on the desk. I grabbed it with my long nails and dashed after him. I fount him gasping for air against the piller. 

Herminny Granger came up and shoved me to the ground. She giggled and ran away. Fucking prepz. I put my middle finger up at her. 

~Time skipz to tonight lol~

“I have to go, draco” I gasped, looking depressed. 

“What? Are you inliove with professor snap or something?” draco weaped while singing “im not okay” my mcr. 

“So what if i am?” i said sneakily, closing my closet. I wore a big poofy dress with ripped black material and corset stuff on the front and back. My lips adorned blood read lipstick and my eyes were dead on the inside. I hummed dear maria count me in as i got dressed. Draco turned around so he wouldnt see me change because that is PORN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I pushed draco over so he hit the floor and walked into prof snap’s office. 

“SNAPEY!” I yelled. He was in the corner looking sad and depressed, watching rain fall from the heavens. 

“Oh. hello there.” he ejaculated as his long nose pointed in my direction and i felt tears wheel in my eyes. He stood and pulled off his cloak to reveal a fall out boy t shirt and ripped skinny jeans with doc martens and chains and zippers everywhere. 

I GASPED “YOURE GOFFICK???????” I was stunned and he strutted over, shaking his thick, juicy, greasy ass. 

“Yes, and emo and goth and punk and and alt and and indie and underground and a soundcloud rapper and in love with you.” He towards over my small frame and looked into my dark black and silver with small golden flecks orbs. I gasped and almost fainted. 

“What about draco?” my voice shaked as he started singing death of a bachelor by my favorite band, the hot panic1

“Forget about that dog poop bag. You are all i need please marry me and become Avril Willow Way Urie Snape.” His mouth covered mine and i moaned into his lips. His tongue fought mine for dominance and his long ring covered hand found my ass. I gasped as he squeezed me and looked at his neck. 

“Is that a stick and poke of a safety pin snapey?” I twirl his long, emo black, greesy hair inbetween my fingers. 

“It symbolizes my hate for the patriarchy and my love for you” 

JUST THEN DRACO WALKED IN AND PUNCHED SNAPE

“SHES MINE GRANDPA!” he yelled, throwing me over his shoulder! I moaned at the feeling and sobbed to be let down. He set me down and looked into my dead orbs with his blood red orbs. He was sobbing

“Snapes your gpa?” i groaned

“No” draco said back

“Oh” i winked

“But youre still mine” draco twerked 

“No thanks. I love snap now”

Draco screamed and ran into the wall while hermiomy recorded and ronuld farted in response. Everyone in the hall started laughing. 

“NO STOP I LOVE HIM!” I wheezed, throwing myself onto the floor in a big heap

Then I stood up and decided i had to go. The end

[bucksbisexual]

okay since im rewatching 2gether, might as well make my reaction public lol

tine trying to be a supportive boyfriend by asking wat if something is troublig and wat’s himbo self being like “nah fam im good” god i love this dumbass

also tine not knowing how to talk about his feelings is so relatable help

honestly i would’ve LOVED to see sarawat at least one (1) question

tine’s smile while wat drinks..... Sir I Am In Love With You

also his blush..... Sir I Am More In Love With You Than I Was Before

“is the lyric about smile or happiness?” “don’t cheat” wat saw through his bullshit right there KSJFHKS

i wonder what’s in those glasses because it doesn’t quite look like coke but it obviously isn’t beer,,,,

ohhhhh “a friend from high school” ... explains tine’s reaction we see in the teaser when he introduces pam as his highschool friend

also explains why tine thought sarawat made that video for her instead of him. wat is in his high school clothes and tine probably thought it was before he saw him (when in fact it was probably recorded the same day lmao sarawat hopeless romantic)

tine: one more game! [spins the coin and supposedly falls on heads] wat!

sarawat: no one can talk to me if i fall asleep

i’m trying not to look at bright’s jiggly butt why is ass so fat fOR

it doesnt add the points here if i dont write something else so intro time yeet

yknow what . we need more earn and more pear in these two last episodes . i need my wlw rep and i need it Now

“personal space is important even for couples” still cant believe man was the owner of their braincell in this scene

tine giving all of type’s info away to wat so wat can give it to man who tine knows will use to pester him until he becomes his boyfriend...... say it with me: tine mantype shipper

“how did you know?” “i prayed to god” literally the funniest part ever

manboss: im not going good luck wat: you’re so full of bullshit

GREEN <3

i will just say that pink is tine’s best colour. i need him in every soft pink thing u can find. it accentuates his skin colour so perfectly and we are Here for it honeyyyy

MIL SHUT THE FUCKUP

sarawat being a savage (rachet booty nasty) we stan

bro get over him oh my god he’s taken and happy with wat LEAVEEEEEE

and man pestering type begins Now ksjfh

i’m like 100000000% sure that the only thing in that whole backpack is a pencil and half of an eraser

im also sure type saw him buy the book since u literally can see him from where man and that girl are and

hold up the waiter looks like a guy from whyru,,,,,,,,,,

i need someone to write a fic about tine being an astronomy lover and wat falling in love with him because of the joy in his eyes when he talks about the stars and interesting facts about the universe and new discoveries of galaxies and other things that wat doesnt really care about but he listens to either way because he’s too in love to shut off his brain

okay back to the episode sorry i just really had to say this

wat really said “don’t take advantage of me when i’m sleeping” when they haven’t even kissed.......... no words, completely speechless

tine probably thought he was being real sneaky right there lmao boy he fell asleep 2 seconds ago

god green really appears for 2 seconds and yet he steals the show KSFJHKFJFS he really was about to beat the person in front of him’s ass for not walking faster im crying i love him

BITCH SHUT UP AND LEAVE THEM ALONE STOP TRYING TO BE A HOMEWRECKER

wat looks so offended by his offer it’s so funny jhfksjhgj still MIL GET THE FUCK OUT

them running around is so funny when u know they had to do that like 20 times and were tired as fuck KSJFHKSHFS

WAT YOU SMOOTH FUCKER i love u

omg the bracelet truly isnt there at the start of the scene :-(

“nuisance tree” lemme just cry a bit

the music stopping here......... they truly played with our feelings there huh

WAT YOU SMOOTH FUCKER 2

the reactions are so kdrama outro i cant breathe KJHFJSFKJS

GET THE FUCK OUTTTTTTTTTTT

“well, you left him” IM GOING TO STEP ON YOU

bracelet where r u :-(

“it was here a second ago” it wasn’t im an obsessed bitch and noticed just as the scene there started

he looks so worried:-( tine baby

“i can make you a new one” “but i want the old one” why do i feel like that has more than one meaning,,,

half of the times wat touches tine’s head his hands are dirty as fuck lmaoooooo

is- is someone wearing a marihuana dress??????

manbosss again and he has a book

type is the teepakorn brother that can lie and will lie meanwhile tine can’t lie for a living

I LOVE THIS GUY GIVE ME HIS SELF CONFIDENCE

dim really made up a whole spirit just for wat to be with tine lmao i cant breathe (unless the pine tree spirit is an actual thing and he just used it for this specific thing lmao)

“that senior is me” “and who did you go with?” “that was a long time ago” “it wasn’t me, it wasn’t me” “green, drop it!” i love them KSFJHFSJHF

green and wats faces i cant bREATHE these are the faces of people who know this is all fake

BRO WAT WASNT EVEN THAT SLICK WITH THE PAPER IN HIS HAND SJKHSFHHKFS

my guess is that he had two papers that were the same number just incase they didnt get the same number but then somehow mf MIL had to come in and ruin it

i dont know who chose to make bright wear this much brown but it honestly fits him so well

coffee for his soon to be boyfie

man: loving u is kind of bothering? type: o_o man

he’s still reading the book kjshfsf WAIT HES SO CUTE

“you gotta miss me if i don’t show up one day” “just back off. i’m leaving. do not follow me. give me some time to miss you” okay tsundere ass bitch

type’s so rich he’d rather spend money on getting his tire fixed than get it fixed by man for free i hate rich people

he’s also too rich to care to check if his doors were locked i-

“for me?” “do you see anyone else?” bitch ass tsundere

type: smiles, realises he just did that, eyes cutely go o_o

type looks so cute in that scene for no reason im going to eat ur cheeks if u dont stop being a cutie

aaaaaand of course theyre not paired up

dude of course he is youre creepy and also trying to break his relationship apart only because u dont have the decency to see that you dont have a place in his heart whatsoever

dim honey........ jskhsjf

tine’s hair....... PLEASE I NEED TO TOUCH IT IT LOOKS SO FLUFFY

“the spirit doesnt like it when you pray with your eyes opened” did literally no one notice how nonsense that was? KSFJHSJ

GREEN U SCARED THE BABY WHY WOULD U DRESS LIKE THAT

he looks so cute im gonna cry like actually cry

weak ass blankets they gave them i swear

if u cuddled then u wouldnt have been cold but noooooo ur big puppy boyfriend has trust issues

baby:-((((((((((( i will cover u with a blanket and give u lots of kithes and hugs

tine having his phone die at an important moment and also having no sense of direction whatsoever is so relatable lmaooooo

thank god for the rain because otherwise sarawat wouldnt have ran the way tine actually went lmao i wouldve beaten dims ass if mil was the one who found him

this scene hurts so much:-(( his throwing the grass like that in complete defeat??????? the flashback to him saying that bad things seem to happen to them lately makes my heart break

the soft touches:-((((( please im gonna Cry

dnotsaysorrydontsaysorrydonsaysorrydontsayHE SAID SORRY FFS

baby :’((((((

“i prayed for something but i havent redeemed that prayer yet” “what did you ask for?” “it’s if i got to see you again, i would show you the video i made. it’s the song your smile you are so curious about” BITCHHHHHHHHH

HES GONNA SHOW ITTTTTT YES I LOVE HOPELESS ROMANTIC HIGHSCHOOLER SARAWAT

he’s all shy i cant breathe he cant even look at the screen skjfhksh

oh so it was on the same day sksjhj forgot about that

I CRY I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

tine is all blushy im gonna sob i love these two

im trying not to scream and tines reaction to wat telling him he went to every scrubb concert just to look for him

ITS NOT GONNA GET STUCK ON THE VIDEO BABY HE WILL LIKE U BACK IN A YEAR!!!!!!

“i like you” “yeah. i know. i like you too” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA IM LITERALLY REWATCHINNG BUT I STILL JUST SCREECHED AT THAT I LOVE THIS CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

their smiles after he said it tho.......... my heart hURTS

wat: the wish only drew us to cross paths again. us being together is because of something else, tine: what then? wat: shout out to my homies for being there for me since day one i love u bros

THE FLASHBACK AAAAAAAA I FOUND HIM YES U DID BABYYYYYY

boss’s whistle after he tells them that he only said he would kiss him until he dropped lmaoooooo

“his name is tine. [with the softest voice ever] what a cute name”

manboss looking at each other like this bitch is so gone for this random dude but we’re gonna support him because we’re the only friends he has

wat was probably wishing the pool had water in it so he could throw both of them into it at that moment KJSFHJSFHF

“he’s the one i like” “shiiiiiit” same dim, same

fan dee nAAAAAA

his ass was so gone he was gonna make his ig username lovetine i literally cant believe him

boss having the braincell in this scene i love it

“but earn has a boyfriend” LIES. SO MANY LIES. ITS A GIRL. SHES A WHOLE LESBIAN.

boss once again being the owner of the braincell...... im starting to think he owns it half of the time

“you get it now? us being together is not a coincidence. it’s because of us” WAT YOU SMOOTH FUCKER 3

wait,,,,, tine’s little head tilt,,,,,,, SIR I AM IN LOVE WITH YOU

the stars!!!!!!!!! theyre there!!!!!!

“i think nothing bad is going to happen anymore” honey you got a big storm coming

it ended :’(((((( my beautiful boys i love this episode and drama so much i swear

lets watch the next episode teaser

i dont think tine is gonna lsiten to pam saying that but if he does,,, baby pls dont overthink okay he loves u and wont leave u for anyone in the world

phukong dont come back to him he knows that u like him and will play with ur feelings

type is gonna have to choose between im guessing either a boy interested in him from work or man and im gonna vote for him going with man lets hope i win

WHAT IS WRNOG WITH U BRO GET OUT HES HIS BOYFRIEND OF COURSE HES GOING TO CARE AND WORRY YOURE JSUT A CREEP FOLLOWING HIM AROUND HOPING THAT THEIR RELATIONSHIP ENDS SO U CAN SNEAK IN UGH

“is pam your first love?” WHY DID U END THE TEASER THERE AAAAAAA BITCH

im so glad that the episode comes out today because i Need to know more

okay thats it if anyone read all of this first of all sorry kjshkfj and second of all thank u ,, u didnt have to but u did and ily for that okay bye

[feisty-fae]

If you still do the flower ask thingys.. 👉👈 𝘼𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙛 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙢 𝙜𝙤 :)

HoooH boY hEre we gO-

Alisons: Sexuality?

I sexually identify as a can of beans

Amaranth: Pronouns/Gender?

Cis female she/her

Amaryllis: Birthday?

27 September

Anemone: Favorite flower?

All flowers pretty,, but stargazer lily, rose, dahlia and cherry blossoms

Angelonia: Favorite t.v. show?

I don't watch tv but I'll list some other stuff i like to watch:mha, beastars and aggretsuko

Arum-Lily: What’s the farthest you’d go for a stranger?

Idk depends on scenario??

Aster: What’s one of your favorite quotes?

"Kanye West he likes, fingers in his ass."

Aubrieta: Favorite drink?

Any Milkshakes or smoothies (mostly banana and strawberry for milkshake and p much anything for smoothie)

Baby’s Breath: Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

I've never had kith

Balsam Fir: Have you ever been in love?

Well you see yes but actually no

Baneberries: Favorite song?

I listen to a lot but to keep it short:baby in the kitchen, in my mouth and friends slowed (chase atlantic)

Basket of Gold: Describe your family.

We p chill fam

Beebalm: Do you have a best friend? Who is it?

Irl bestie,, shes not on tumblr lol

Begonia: Favorite color?

PinKKK

But i like most colours

Bellflower: Favorite animal?

Cats,,,,

FoxES,

ANYTHING CUDDLY AND CUTE

Bergenia: Are you a morning or night person?

Night

Black-Eyed Susan: If you could be any animal for a day, what would it be?

I'd be like a doggo bc it would be the most fun i think-

Bloodroots: When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I wanted to be a vet but then when my granny asked me "but whos gonna clean up the animal poop?" I was like "eWW pO0pP!" and then decided that mayb i shouldn't be a vet

Bluemink: What are your thoughts on children?

They're either really kind and sweet

Or literal demons from hell

Legit no inbetween

Blazing Stars: What are you afraid of? Is there a reason why?

I'm afraid of lot of things-

Borage: Give a random fact about your childhood.

I was one dumbass bitcg-

Bugleherb: How would you spend your last day on Earth?

Idk eat pizza and cry or smth ajakamkw

Buttercup: Relationship Status?

Single

Camelia: If you could visit anywhere, where would you want to go?

NEW YORKKK, CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OFFF THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN'T DO NOW YOU'RE IN NEW YOOORKKK

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

When someone hugs me or just generally spends time with me

Canna: Do you have any tattoos?

Nop

Canterbury Bells: Do you have any piercings?

I used to have piercings when i was a bab but eHh haven't worn them since and i dont think my ear holes are big enough now-

California Poppy: Height?

4'10 grrr I'm the omega midget and I'll devour ur ankles

Cardinal Flower: Do you believe in ghosts?

Nop

Carnation: What are you currently wearing?

Pant, pink top and black hoodie

Catnip: Have you ever slept with a nightlight?

I think i have??

Chives: Who was the last person you hugged?

My mom and my dad

Chrysanthemum: Who’s the last person you kissed?

I never kith

Cock’s Comb: Favorite font?

I dont have one so imma say sans bc it always looks out of place and makes me laugh-

Columbine: Are you tired?

No

I feel like screaming and jumping around my room like a crackhead

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

Nothing in particular ig

Coneflower: Dream job?

Smth kinda fun and art or design related hopefully,,,,

Crane’s-Bill: Introvert or extrovert?

Introvert but i also get lonley easily

Crocus: Have you ever been in love?

Nop,,,,

Crown Imperial: What’s the farthest you would go for someone you care about?

I would get run over by 5 monster trucks, jump off a plane, get mauled by 10 bears, get trampled on by a stampede, get brutally tortured for 12 hours straight, yeet myself into the Grand Canyon and then break all my bones with my bare hands if they weren't broken already

Ok basically i care a lot

Cyclamen: Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a child? What was it?

I had this st bernard plush called Sparky and this lion named Sammy,,

Daffodil: What’s your zodiac sign?

Libra

Dahlia: Have you done anything worth remembering?

My memory is legit so bad it's probably concerning uHHH

Daisy: What do you feel is your greatest accomplishment?

Mayb art??

Daylily: What would you do if your parents didn’t like your partner(s)?

Ehhh i might reason with them and then if they still disagreed I'd just keep the relationship a secret

Dendrobium: Who is the last person that you said “I love you” to?

My parents

False Goat’s Beard: What is something you are good at?

Ehhh arT

Foxgloves: What’s something you’re bad at?

EhhHh everything that isn't art-

Freesia: What are three good things that have happened in the past month?

Oh boy here comes my shitty memory-

Hmmm

Idk but I'm mostly happy that I've been more social and stuff and i feel like im kinda coming out of my shell a bit

Not sure what to say for other 2 bc nothing in particular has really happend?

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

Ehhh oK??

Gardenia: Are you happy with where you’re at in your life?

Mayhapsn't

Gladiolus: What is something you hope to do in the next year or two?

I hope to pass all my exams and get an okish job mayb

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

1.fRIENBS ILY MY HABIBIS

2. Fammm

3. eHhh yummy food,,

4. Drawing and uhhh art

5. EPIC MUTUALS

6. Ok idk what else aside from like serious stuff like house and etc.-

Heliotropium: What helps you calm down when you feel stressed?

Drawing, crying, venting to a friend/parent

Hellebore: How do you show affection?

Hugssss,kith,cuddle, *draws u stuff*

Hoary Stock: What are you proudest of?

MmmmmMy aRRt?

Hollyhock: Describe your ideal day.

Wake up

Don't go to school

Vibe with friends

Sleeb

Hyacinth: What do you like to do in your free time?

MmMmMM aRT-

Hydrangea: How long have you known your best friend? How did you meet them?

Ehh 8yrs? We met in hell school

Irises: Who can you talk to about (almost) everything?

Friendos

Mom

Laceleaf: How many friends do you have?

6..?? Aa idk theres some people that idk if they'd consider me a friend or not,,

Lantanas: What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received?

Idk any compliment is best compliment for me,,

Larkspur: What do you think of yourself?

Ew yucky gröss

Lavender: What’s your favorite thing about yourself?

m y a r t

Also my hair bc its soft and wavy,,

Leather Flower: What’s your least favorite thing about yourself?

Everything else-

Lilac: What’s something you liked to do as a child?

Climb trees and do dumb shit

Lily: Who was your best friend when you were a kid?

Same irl bestie i mentioned before

Lily of the Incas: What is something you still feel guilty for?

MmmmmmMMM,,,

Lily of the Nile: What is something you feel guilty for that you shouldn’t feel guilty about?

MMMmMMmMMMMmmmMMm,,,,,,

Lupine: What does your name mean? Why is that your name?

Well I chose Fae bc i thought it sounded pretty

Marigold: Where did you grow up? Tell us about it.

Idk what to rlly say lmao

Morning Glory: What was your bedroom like growing up?

Kinda the same but i had toys everywhere-

Also when i was like 5 i had this legit fucking cursed thomas the tank engine shaped bed that i actually found a pic of but it's FUCKING HORRIFYING SO I PROBS WONT SHOW HERE-

Mugworts: What was it like for you as a teenager? Did you enjoy your teenage years?

EW BEING A TEENAGER SUCKS ASS HOW DO I UNDO????

Norwegian Angelica: Tell us about your mom.

Hi mom ily ur epic

Onions: Tell about your dad.

Hi dad ily ur epic

Orchid: Tell about your grandparents.

Omg i miss my grannies sm bc i couldn't see em this year bc nasty pandemic

Pansy: What was your most memorable birthday? What made it be so memorable?

Haha shit memory gor brrRR-

I don't really remember too many specific parties but when i was like 7-10 i had these epic parties in those birthday places with the giant play areas

I kinda wish i wasn't too old to go to them sobs

Peony: What was your first job?

I haven't had a job yet

Petunia: If you’re in a relationship, how did you meet your partner(s)? If you’re not in a relationship, how did you meet your crush/how do you hope to meet your future partner(s), if you want any?

Hmmmm idk? I haven't really thought abt that but i don't really mind i just wanna find someone to vibe with,,

Pincushion: How do you deal with pain?

I cri

Pink: Where is home?

Home is home home

Plantain Lilies: If you could go back in time, what is one thing you would stop/change?

Now where do i start...

Prairie Gentian: Who is someone you look up to? Describe them.

I look up to people that are kind, caring, brave, funny, cool or stronger than me ig?

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

Basically my current life minus school, stress,pandemic and responsibilities lmao

Rhodendron: What is something you used to believe in as a child?

I used to believe in ghosts after i thought i encountered one

Ricinus: Who’s the most important in your life?

Hermmmst

Rose: What’s your favorite sound?

Peoples laughsss also music

Rosemallows: What’s your favorite memory?

Bro i dont have one,, my aphantasia makes it hard for me to remember stuff-

Sage: What’s your least favorite memory?

A

Snapdragon: At this moment, what do you want?

I wantttt better chargersss thattt donttt telll meee thatt myyy tablett will finishh chargingg innn 1 dayy andd 7 hoursss

St. John’s Wort: Is it easy or difficult for you to express how you feel about things?

Kinda difficult but im opening up more

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

fRIENDS,,,,,wAh

Sweet Pea: How much sleep did you get last night?

8 hrs

Tickseed: What’s your main reason to get up every morning?

Idk ig i kinda have to go to school and do stuff

Touch-Me-Not: How do you feel about your current job?

Non existant

Transvaal Daisy: What’s your favorite item of clothing?

My black and white stripy top, and all my hoodiess

Tropical White Morning Glory: Describe your aesthetic.

I don't think i have just one aesthetic bc im drawn to so many different aesthetics at the same time-

Like vintage, neon, dark, spoopy, pastel, cute, etc etc

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

OMG I LEGIT JUST SCREAM AT ANYTHING ANYONE GIVES ME-

IF SOMEONE GOES OUT OF THEIR WAY TO MAKE ME SMTH I CRY,,

Vervain: What’s stressing you out most right now?

🤏

Wisteria: How many books have you read in the past few months? What were they called?

I haven't been reading anythinggg

But i should really finish reading Percy Jackson bc it do be picking up dust-

Wolf’s Bane: Where do you want to be in life this time next year?

Everywhere

Yarrow: Do you know what vore is?

Mmm yummy 👅

Zinnia: Give a random fact about yourself.

I am currently living and breathing yes

[halorocks1214]

the law of relativity

AO3 Link

Word Count: 9963

Summary: The Law of Relativity states that each person will receive a series of problems (‘tests of initiation’) for the purpose of strengthening the ‘light’ within. We must consider each of these tests to be a challenge and remain connected to our hearts when proceeding to solve the problems. This law also teaches us to compare our problems to others’ problems and put everything into its proper perspective. No matter how bad we perceive our situation to be, there is always someone who is in a worse position. It is all relative

Previous Parts (in order): Alan | Virgil | You are here! | Gordon

WHY 👏🏼 CANT 👏🏼 I 👏🏼 WRITE 👏🏼 FICS 👏🏼 IN 👏🏼 MO 👏🏼 DER 👏🏼 RATION 👏🏼👏🏼👏🏼 also just bluuuergh. dont ask about this fic. part of it was written in a dark auditorium, another was written in a different state, another was written on a frickin bus, this fic has been places ill tell you what. half the time i think this is hot garbage and the other half i think its actually decent so im posting this while my head is in a good headspace and then promptly yeeting myself off the internet for a few hours to wait and see what happens. this series is becoming less of a canon divergence AU and more of a straight-up AU because of certain details im trying to worm in there buT IM TRYING MY BEST

thanks once more to @gumnut-logic, because of the length, this time i used three prompts, them being "What do you mean?", crease, and dream (and they werent even used that much sksksksk)

Warnings for both graphic and non-graphic depictions of violence, as well as mentions of torture and other PTSD/panic attack related stuff. I went deep with this one fellas

Orphan.

The word tasted dirty in his mouth.

He can still see the footage in the backs of his eyelids from when he watched it exactly one year ago. He was the only other (living) adult at the time in the family outside of Grandma, so he was permitted to see it. He remembered they originally didn’t want to show him, mainly because of his age, but Grandma was fierce, and she put one hell of an argument on the table.

One Scott refused to let fall through the cracks by breaking down. If only Grandma knew how he cried his eyes out and screamed to high heaven that night in the hotel room after essentially watching his father be blown to bloody smithereens then she was a goddamn saint for keeping it a secret. It made sense, she was the mother to his father. She had quite the line up of stories from Jeff’s childhood. Scott sensed the early-greying of his hair came from her, heh.

The rest of his family eventually saw it, of course, they did. Scott couldn’t shield them forever. What he will protect, selfishly he might add, was how angry he was at how much better they took it than he did. They cried, yes they did, but they never fully broke down like Scott did. Later in life, he wondered if it was jealousy: jealousy at not truly being able to let go. Whatever it was, he made sure to swallow it along with whatever alcohol he chose for the weekend.

Just add it to the ever-growing pile of shit he had to deal with. Nothing new.

Suddenly he’s 20 again and seated in a plane to be taken to his first stint in the Air Force. He said his goodbyes to Virgil, Gordon, and Alan back at home while Grandma and John metaphorically held his hand all the way to the airport. John was… quiet, more so than usual, but Grandma was stuck right in the middle between being a sobbing mess and ecstatic at the fine young man he’s become.

You’re just like your father. He would be proud.

Scott was secretly glad she never physically said it. It gave him plausible deniability in thinking that those words weren’t laced behind her big, bright, prideful eyes.

The first time went well, maybe even great. He stayed for a couple of months, did some flight tests, and while the training was brutal, boy did he learn a lot. When he came back home it was to a family slowly stitching itself back together. Grandma was a full-time house member, Virgil had taken up painting, Gordon talked about potentially going back to his swim meets, and while Alan was still as silent as ever, he was perkier than when Scott last saw him.

It would be on and off for the next few years: a couple of months at home, slowly and painfully taking over the role their father had (he can’t remember when he essentially received joint custody of his younger siblings with Grandma, but hey, he’s not complaining), then a couple of months out at the Air Force base where he slowly climbed up the ranking platform. He became skillful, perhaps too skillful. When he got his rank of Captain he felt it was less of an honor and more of something they owed him.

He was getting cocky. Never enough to be a danger to his fellow men, but enough to be somewhat of an occasional annoyance. Charles smacked him upside the head more than once. It felt like the world was right-side-up for once. Scott made many-a-calls to John and Virgil, the former enjoying his first few rotations up in space and the latter squarely in the middle of college. Gordon was being offered sponsorships to hell and back, and Alan was quietly getting along with the other kids at his school. Grandma was on welcoming duty for Kayo, who was taking her slot in the Tracy family with grace, though, a warning that their family would take custody of her if something were to happen to her parents would have been nice, Dad.

Of course, nothing ever goes right for their family for too long.

Orphan.

Age 24, it was supposed to be a simple retrieval mission of civilians. Scott was put in charge of his squad and then some. At night, they rolled-- well, flew out to get the job done. Scott can’t even remember the country anymore when minding his own business. Australia? Finland? Perhaps Bangladesh? There was a place John was insistent Scott never do rescues in, Virgil tended to agree, and the eldest unhealthily let them banish him from ever stepping foot there without argument. He could never remember the name off the top of his head until John’s familiar International Rescue, we have a situation rung out in the living room followed by the name of the country.

He would immediately forget it later, trauma too strong, too volatile, but the way his heart stopped and his head shattered and the way he felt ice water rush down his back was a good enough reason to quietly leave the room and let John delegate the job to one of his brothers. Sometimes John found him retching in the toilet halfway through the mission. He made sure to always mute Scott’s wrist communicator, even if it was never turned on in the first place.

The plane touched down. Orders sent the ground team out. But then the ground team took longer than estimated. Scott tensely waited where he was told to. It wasn’t the first mission that took a little longer than predicted and knowing humans, it surely wouldn’t be the last. Then, words mixed with heavy static came over the radio. H--p. Co-- ---7--. --nd ba---p --me--at--y.

Scott sat tensely in his seat, remembering his orders and suddenly hating them. Radio back to home if the mission goes south. Well, it didn’t look like they had the radio anymore. Still didn’t hurt to try at least. Scott spoke the familiar protocol that was ingrained into him when trying to call base. Dammit. Nothing. Probably some kind of blocker of sorts. Sitting up straight as a board, Scott looked through his options.

… He was in charge here. If something happened to his team the fault would lie squarely on his shoulders. Going against everything but his gut, he went out to help his squad. He can’t really remember what he exactly did anymore, but he does remember that it made a noise. Like a Looney Tunes scene: he flinched, froze, waited to see if anything or one heard, breathed a sigh of relief, and continued.

He eventually stumbled across one of his closest comrades, Arnold Brigeets. Yes, the name was ironic and half the reason he joined the force in the first place. The guy was one of the people that actually trained Scott and also seemed to be one of the few that was genuinely proud when Scott became a higher rank. It’s why Scott was more appreciative of Arnold than others, that, and well… Scott thought his fatherly abilities were good. The guy did have three kids back home.

Orphan.

Ducking down behind the cover his older friend was semi-situated behind, Scott watched as Arnold jumped at the intrusion before sighing. Scott had run into some enemies that he swiftly took down-- nothing too serious, he didn’t have the time or weapons for such an act, but they definitely would be out of it for a while-- so Arnold must have too on his way to find cover as well, hence why he was so on edge.

“Thank God,” Arnold wiped his forehead, “Glad to see you join us, kid.”

Scott was breathing heavily, but the grin he attempted was still there, “Y-Yeah, so what happened? More threats than we thought?”

Arnold shook his head, “Yes and no. There were a lot more baddies than we thought, but that’s because the civilians weren’t civilians. It’s a tr--”

Boom. The familiar sound of a gunshot.

Arnold fell over. Never got back up. Dropped like a rock in a lake, never to come up to the surface again.

Scott was so caught off guard he couldn’t react to the gun that swiftly beat him over the head, knocking him out cold. The only thing on his mind was oh fuck oh fuck I messed up I shouldn’t have come I wouldn’t have made any noise that way why did I--

They had him for roughly two weeks. Scott always thought the plotline in movies where the villain vehemently denied knowing any important information was dumb as hell. We’re not stupid. We wouldn’t go after someone if they didn’t know something.

The things they did hurt and no amount of I don’t fucking know anything! would help. Those two weeks were lost to Scott in a sea of pain and torment. The only thing he remembered was being captured, then waking up in a hospital drugged up to his gills with his superiors staring at him like he cured cancer.

“You saved the rest of your squad from sharing the same fate as the first half.”

“I-I did?”

“You betcha, son. I only wish I was there to see it! People be saying you were like an animal in how you took ‘em all down.”

Scott’s never remembered, and he wanted to keep it that way.

He was given the highest honors, even the chance to skip a couple of ranks to be at the same level as the big boys, but the night they were going to share the news to the golden boy himself, they found him in one of the bathrooms with a bloody hand and a mirror shattered with no hope of fixing it.

He was honorably discharged to a family that was so thankful he was home. Words like missing in action and POA never stopped haunting their nightmares. Scott was too, God, of course, he was, but sitting around and doing nothing was the last thing his traumatized mind wanted or maybe even needed. After doing what he considered to be the biggest fuck-up of his life, he needed to feel important.

This isn’t the first time he’ll say this and it surely won’t be the last: thank Christ for Grandma.

“You want me to take over?...”

“Yep, it’s about time Tracy Industries received a new pair of eyes. The Board certainly thinks so.”

“But… they’d rather have a crazy, PTSD-infected veteran over you?”

A rough pinch to his ear, “Hey now, don’t call yourself that,” the gentle motherly tone was back as soon as it left, “Besides, that crazy might exactly be what they want. Half of their argument is that I “don’t take enough risks.” They’re getting tired of listening to an old fart like me.”

A moment of contemplation, followed by the cheeky raise of an eyebrow, “So you’re saying you want me to take so many risks they have no choice but to take you back?”

A bark of laughter, “Damn straight.”

He learned the ropes faster than normal (healthy, is probably the correct term), and he immediately won the hearts of both young and old in the company. Instead of flying planes every few months, he worked on business reports and vetoed new ideas every couple of weeks. It felt satisfying for the most part, and his family was just happy he was still alive to enjoy it.

However, there was a slight roadblock on his way to becoming a somewhat stable person.

He became prone to violent blackouts. It had to have started when he blacked out and saved himself from those two weeks of hell, which made the most sense. Something was always destroyed when he came back to life. John was the best at calming him down due to his own experience with panic attacks, however, John couldn’t always be there, and the next rotation for NASA was coming swiftly. Scott swore up and down he would be fine, he could figure something out. John went back into space with an eyebrow permanently raised.

It was just him and Virgil home (Grandma had taken Alan and Kayo to watch Gordon swim) when he, unfortunately, proved John right. Scott wasn’t sure what triggered it, but he vividly remembered coming back in Virgil’s extremely tight hold. The first thing Scott thought to say was damn, beanstalk, when did you get so strong? but then he laid his eyes upon the forming bruise on his younger bro’s face and hasn’t recovered since.

Virgil swore he never held it against Scott. Scott definitely thought he should have.

That night brought sudden clarity to Scott that he was doing this horribly wrong. He was a ticking time bomb, and it wouldn’t be long before something was damaged in a way that couldn’t be fixed. Scott needed an anchor. Something to ground him before he took it too far. John wasn’t going to be earthside forever, Grandma was busy with Kayo, Alan was just a kid, and Gordon was living the dream. None of them were viable.

Then, as he was thinking, he was suddenly aware of how calming Virgil’s arms were around him, how they were preventing the growing panic attack in his chest from getting even bigger.

It was easy.

For once in Scott’s life, his eyes were big and young as he asked Virgil, “Help me, please.”

After a few brief seconds, Virgil gulped, “Okay.”

From then on, Virgil was Stone Number One. Scott’s admiration for Virgil outweighed the guilt of putting the black-haired man in that position in the first place. Virgil was glad to follow his older brother’s leadership, but just as qualified to bring him the hell back when he went too far. From getting too sacrificial to preventing a good punching-out some of the idiots they dealt with, Virgil made sure Scott knocked that shit off.

Time went on, Scott was a top-notch CEO at Tracy Industries, John was having one hell of a time up in space, Virgil was graduated and had so many life opportunities to pick from, Alan was thriving at being a (mostly) stable kid, Kayo was 100% acclimated to the family, and Gordon--

Scott found himself gripping the wooden desk very abruptly. He was shocked he didn’t snap a chunk off in the process. Why was he thinking about this right after a giant business conference? Who knows at this point. If this giant origin story seemed jagged and jumpy, maybe even somewhat vague, good, that’s how it fucking felt.

Back to said story.

Scott always thought he and Gordon would have the least amount in common.

They do, but out of all the things they could have picked to be similar, why did it have to be the PTSD caused by military-related jobs? Scott was 24 when he got his, Gordon was just under 20. It may have been a few years since their respective accidents, but they’re never going to go another day without it feeling like it was just yesterday.

At this point, Gordon was up and walking again, mainly thanks to John and Alan while Virgil and Scott helped in their own ways. Grandma’s cooking was what probably motivated him the most though, ha, the need to get away from it… Scott smiled. Grandma was always a constant. Honestly, if it weren’t for her, the family might have fallen apart. Literally.

What has he been saying throughout this whole shindig? Thank Christ for Grandma.

One day out of the blue, Grandma reserved the entire family (yes, even Kayo and Alan) private plane tickets so they could spend some time on the mainland for a few days. Honestly, even if the island wasn’t getting major renovations, you hooligans need to get out more. Have some fun. Try not to kill anything, especially each other, she all told them while creepily grinning. John and Virgil smacked Gordon more than once on the plane for insisting that she finally snapped, dudes, she’s gonna kill us.

Most of the time during their little vacation, Scott heavily focused on his breathing. He was pretty sure he knew what she was doing. He would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous, but the same went for his excitement.

Dad showed him these plans the day after his 18th birthday. You’re a man now, Scotty, I need your help making this big boy decision with me.

As soon as they reset foot down on the island, Scott took a deep breath and felt relaxed at the salty taste in the air. It was weird, nothing on the outside was changed, and yet… it still felt different.

“Guys!” Virgil yelled out, “Stop playing in the water! We just got back, aren’t you two tired?!”

Blinking back to reality, Scott looked over to see his two youngest brothers doing exactly what Virgil was yelling at them for. Poor Johnny was a little damp too, which is what probably caused Virgil to shout at them in the first place. The blondes didn’t care. They continued to prance around in the shallow waves with their pants legs rolled up, acting as if they didn’t hear anything outside of their laughter. Gordon shoved his hands down into the liquid and threw some directly at Alan, nailing him right in the face.

Scott exhaled slowly. He couldn’t imagine them doing this 8 years ago.

Regardless, the artist was right, and they couldn’t waste too much time. Kayo was swift in grabbing both gentlemen by the ears and dragging them onto dry land. They all painstakingly trekked their way up to the-- what would you call Tracy Island? Mansion? Over-blown cabin? Well, whatever it was, Scott would always be willing to call it home.

Stepping inside, each brother took in the view, which was underwhelmingly not that much different, except for one tiny thing. John suddenly noticed a figure already standing in the living room and blinked, “No way… it’s--”

Gordon jumped in, both with his body and his words, “Brains?! Dude, how’s it hanging?!”

The scientist in question jumped at the voices before clearing his throat and readjusting his glasses, “O-Oh, hello again, T-Tracys. It’s good to see you all once more.”

Virgil slung an arm around his shoulder, ignoring the blatant squawk, “Man, how long has it been?! What made you finally decide to crawl out of your hole?”

Snickers came from all corners of the house. Brains stood up straighter, “W-Well, I was contacted b-by Mrs. Tracy over here with an offer I c-couldn’t turn down.”

Eyebrows tilted in all shapes and sizes. Someone cleared their throat. Everyone turned to look at Grandma once again, “I think if you all follow me, you’ll swiftly understand what I’m talking about.”

I already do, Scott thought matter-of-factly. John seemed to be understanding it now, Virgil was on the cusp of remembering what his father was hinting at for him, and Gordon was just as lost as Alan. It made sense, Jeff talked to all of them about it, but the oldest had seniority. The two youngest not remembering just by words was expected, especially since that was going to be rectified very quickly.

The hangar under the island was beautiful. Point blank. It smelt of iron and steel and grease and engine and that was the first time since Scott had been in the Air Force that he didn’t gag or flinch at the thought of flying something again. Scott had seen the plans his father drew. He assumed Jeff finished building it, but he never got to physically see it since…

In some ways, he was glad he didn’t. Now he got to experience it with (most of) his family, and that made it ten times better.

After letting them absorb the scenery, Grandma slowly turned around to look at them all, “You remember that dream your father had?”

The four oldest blinked, Kayo simply raised her eyebrows, meanwhile, Alan, being the teenager he was, didn’t read the emotion in the room, “Oh, yeah! Aunt Casey always talked about how he was going to “change the world” and stuff. What did he call it again?”

Scott felt way more confident than he had in a while, “International Rescue.”

Grandma nodded, gleeful at the happy look on her oldest and youngest grandsons’ faces, “Well, I’ve been thinking about some things. I know we don’t exactly worry about money, but after everything your father put into these girls… I’d hate for them to go to waste.”

The Tracy family jumped at that. John’s mouth was wide open in shock, yes, shock, “That station is still up there?”

Grandma sighed, “You mean ‘Five? Not for long. Not if we don’t send someone up there within the next few days.”

John blushed at the grin Grandma gave him. Clearing his throat, his big brain came to a startling conclusion, “Wait… you brought Alan along?”

The other big brothers in the room jumped at that. Kayo was the only one with enough balls to say the truth out loud, “Mrs. Tracy, I mean no offense, but he’s--”

“Just a kid?” Grandma smirked, “A kid that’s topped the VR charts for Intergalactic Fury for weeks straight while simultaneously getting nothing but A’s in his classes?”

Scott nodded slowly in comprehension. He remembered Alan talking about that game for a while. It was some kind of online racing simulator of sorts. Scott caught the prettiest string of words from Alan when going to bed one night. Nearly made him shit his pants. He made the kid promise to keep it PG-13 if he wanted to keep playing.

Still, the elders in the family slowly turned to look at the freckled boy with both shock and pride. Alan blinked with wide-eyed innocence, “But my English class is only at a B--”

“Shh, kiddo, I’m making a point,” Grandma rolled her eyes. The other brothers snickered. Yep, still Alan. Grandma sighed, “Now before you point out that video games are different, I know, but the difference between them and this is that video games don’t have some of the most talented older brothers in the world to guide him.”

Said older brothers jumped at the idea. Before any objection could be made, Grandma continued, “Besides, the GDF seemed to be okay with it. The Colonel was willing to oversee some of his training too.”

John flinched at that, “But IR is supposed to be independent!”

Grandma slightly frowned. She didn’t exactly like it either, “It still is, but in the world of business, compromises have to be made.”

Virgil huffed and crossed his arms, “Well, that’s… rough. Here I thought only Scott would have to deal with the bullshit of business.”

Grandma chuckled at the somewhat un-Virgil-like behavior, “It really is, Virgil. But about that Scott part,” she slowly turned to look at him and him only, “I hate to give you more work to do, but if you want to work within their restrictions?”

Suddenly every pair of eyes in the room was on the head of the family. Gulping, Scott looked down at his feet to think. It was a tense few moments, nobody sure what he was going to decide, least of all him, before the brunette cleared his throat and brought his face back up with a grin.

“Well then,” Scott turned to look at the bright tip of ‘One, chest fluttering with a feeling that became unfamiliar to him over the past few years, “I guess now it’s time to state the obvious.”

From then on, every time he loaded into that cockpit of his girl, he felt lighter than air.

“Thunderbirds are GO!”

Everything was okay again.

Mostly.

Orphan.

Scott took another sip of his whiskey and refocused on his reports.

---

Scott was in some kind of dissociative state the whole way home.

Alan doesn’t deserve this. He’s still a kid, barely an adult, and he’s going to go through utter hell because you screwed up. You were 24, Gordon was just under 20, Alan was barely 18. Alan’s going to get fucked up like you and it’s all your fault.

His movements were robotic and rigid. Anyone with a working eye could tell he was deep in shock and running on autopilot. Mostly Jeff. Especially Jeff. The rest of the brothers all noticed too, but they were also running on their own empty fuel tanks, so the only thing they could do was guilty send their older brother the occasional glance of pity and concern.

Jeff was going to need to talk to them about that. Somehow. Maybe he shouldn’t be the one to point it out since he feels just as bad. His sons were too much like him, sometimes, and that made his guilt burn all the same. He should’ve been there to warn his sons about the dangers of unnecessary guilt. Having that kind of guilt was a parent’s job, dammit, and maybe grandparents only occasionally.

But then he remembered where he’s been for the past 8 years and… who really was Alan’s parents anymore? His gut was screaming it sure as hell isn’t you, but he knew his sons would want him to step back into the role as soon as he was physically fit to do so, not just for Alan, but for themselves as well. They would deny it, but they probably just wanted to be kids again too, even if it was only brief, fleeting moments.

Who was to tell the protective, fatherly side of Jeff no to that? No better time to fix things like the present after all.

He saw Scott go up the stairs when they first stepped into the living room, so that’s where Jeff was going to go too. Footsteps light, Jeff retraced his eldest’s pathway to his bedroom. Only, he stopped before said bedroom. Unfavorable noises were coming from the closed bathroom door, and Jeff could only swallow whatever emotion it made him feel. Taking a deep breath, he slowly opened the (unlocked) door to the bathroom and laid his eyes upon the incriminating scene.

Jeff was met with the sight of Scott retching his entire stomach into the toilet, hands aggressively grabbing his sticky, hair-gelled hair and trying to make himself bald from the strain.

Jeff’s reaction was always based on autopilot, and it will never stop being so.

Ignoring his protesting body, Jeff kneeled and placed a hand on his son’s back, only to abruptly pull back like he touched a hot stove when Scott only got more hysterical at the contact. The brunette clenched his eyes shut even more (and they were already shut as much as possible) while his head became a special kind of crease. Like he was in pain, “God, I wanna go home. Why won’t they listen I swear I’m telling the truth! Please, I just want Dad--”

Jeff was frozen on the spot, heart stopping in the process. His brain shut down while he watched his son continue to mindlessly ramble and panic. His freaked-out mind barely registered footsteps from behind in the hallway, followed by a voice going what’s going-- holy--

Something thundered past him. Blinking once, Jeff guiltily watched as Virgil kneeled behind the eldest and wrapped his arms around the thin man’s shoulders while taking Scott’s hands in his in a protective blanket, “Scott! Jesus-- we’re at home, you’re safe and it’s June 14th, 2--”

Scott only struggled more, panicking at the fact he could no longer yank his hair out. Dammit, it was the only way he could feel in control, don’t take that away too! “No! I swear I’ve said everything! Please--”

Virgil immediately knew that this was one of those attacks that Scott wasn’t coming back down from with pure human intervention. Add-on the sight of his father’s big eyes signifying the man was at a loss at what to do, Virgil had no choice. He snapped loudly, remembering the comms were still on and only feeling slightly bad at the way Scott flinched in his arms, “Shit-- John! It’s Scott! Get the stuff! We’re in the upstairs bathroom!”

Muffled footsteps through a few walls in the house could be heard. Jeff’s mind was only starting to catch up when the brother Virgil called for came rushing into the bathroom (Jeff never remembered it being big enough to hold four of them) and ignoring Jeff (practically shoving him out of the way too, man, this was bad) on his way to the main problem at hand. Landing on his knees in a way that made Jeff wince, John gently grabbed one of Scott’s arms from Virgil’s hold and subsequently pulled a needle from nowhere and injected something into Scott.

The response was instantaneous.

Scott’s breathing, while still labored, got slower. He stopped struggling as well, and the way he sagged reminded Jeff of ice melting into a puddle. The two other brothers’ shoulders also sagged, relieved at the crisis averted. John stood up, knees cracking as he rubbed the back of his neck. Then, he froze at the sight of something in the doorway, “G-Gordon…”

Virgil snapped his head up from where he was looking at Scott. Jeff did something similar. Yup, in the doorway was the strawberry blonde, eyes wide, making him younger by about 10 years. The ex-Olympian in question inhaled, closed his eyes, and soon speed-walked his way out of the entrance to the bathroom. Dammit, neither Gordon or Alan have seen something like that and it probably spooked him more than anything. He’d understand with his own PTSD-related issues, but still, seeing the “never weak” big brother freak out in such a scary way...

John combed a hand through his hair, shaking his head. As he started walking out of the room, he whispered to himself, probably hoping no one heard him, “Dammit, this is all so fucked…”

Unfortunately, Jeff did hear, and the dirty language made the father flinch. John was always the best about making sure Grandma didn’t wash his mouth out with soap, and the fact that he so willingly didn’t care meant that everyone was at the end of their rope. Still reeling at the sight, Jeff couldn’t react to the gentle arms that picked him up off the floor and slowly led him out of the suddenly stuffy room.

With the click of the door shutting, Jeff realized what Virgil did, “W-Wait, Scott--”

“Will be okay for a few seconds,” Virgil finished for his dad, “I know it’s nearly been a decade, but the one part of you I definitely know hasn’t changed is the need to comfort us, just like we hoped.” The small grin that fell over the middle child’s face put Jeff a little bit at ease, but Virgil wasn’t completely done, “So, I’m going to let you take care of this, but I just want to make sure you’ll handle it with grace. Take this slowly, okay? Scott might be doped up, but he’s still… volatile, in a sense.”

Jeff cleared his throat, suddenly choking on the unneeded tension, “Okay, Virgil, I promise, just… what happened? That was… bad, and really bad at that too. I know Scott would never let something that severe willingly come out in front of his family.”

Virgil rubbed the back of his neck, clearly not ready for this conversation, “Listen, Dad,” he inhaled sharply, cutting himself off before sighing in a way that said fuck it, might as well get this over with, “As much as it felt like it did, the world didn’t stop spinning because you… well, we had lives we somehow wanted to continue living. We all have lives and stories now, and this is Scott’s story to tell.”

Jeff was getting misty-eyed again. Back when he was just a kid, Virgil couldn’t keep a secret to save his life, mainly in part due to his insomnia-related issues (Jeff has to wonder if he still has them, more problems for the future) and general lack of filter because of sleep-deprivation. Now Jeff knew there was a starch difference between a kid who couldn’t keep his mouth shut and a man who genuinely knew how to respect another man’s privacy, but…

It just hammers home how much he’s missed with his boys. Gulping, Jeff made a mental note to talk with his mom about certain things he’s missed. She’ll know a lot more than he would, “Okay, Virge. Thank you, for stepping up there.”

Virgil’s shoulders relaxed at Jeff’s words, as well as his father’s hand patting him on the shoulder, “Thanks, Dad. Just… go easy on him. I know it’s a little late for this but none of us ever properly talked about things. It was very unhealthy, deep down we all knew that, but…”

“You just couldn’t get the proper emotions out?” Jeff finished for his son. At Virgil’s soft nod, Jeff exhaled, “I’m not going to say that it was a smart decision, but we’re all here now. We can move forward with this.” Jeff squeezed where his hand laid.

Virgil blinked before curtly going, “Yeah. Goodnight, Dad. Take care of Scott.”

Virgil stepped around his father and walked to where his bedroom most definitely was not, but Jeff could deal with that in a little bit. He had another son who he was pretty sure just had a violent PTSD attack of some kind, plus, Virgil seemed to sour at something Jeff said. The ex-astronaut wasn’t sure what it was, so he didn’t chase after him out of worry that--

Wait.

We’re all here now.

Dammit, Jeff. Out of all the sentences you could’ve picked...

Alrighty, just add that to the ever-growing pile of things that need to be talked about later. No biggie. Jeff found himself sighing and rubbing the back of his neck much like Virgil did a few minutes ago. Turning around, he was met with the bathroom door once more. Shaking his head, Jeff slowly crept into the room and saw that not much was different, especially with Scott.

His heart softly cracked, but, again, he can deal with it later.

Sitting down on the ground and grimacing at the way his body ached (was gravity always this rough?), Jeff leaned against the floor cabinets about 2-3 feet away from Scott, who made himself into a nice comfortable ball in the corner next to the toilet, his palm smushed against his forehead. Jeff waited a few seconds. Then minutes. Then he realized he would have to be the one to initiate the conversation. He probably should’ve realized that right when he came back in. He opened his mouth, but his wasn’t the one that words came out of.

“It was… Zambia.”

Jeff’s heart stopped and his mouth snapped shut. He couldn’t stop the way his eyes clearly showed his panic, but hopefully, he guiltily thought, Scott was a little too doped up to not realize it, “Scotty, what do you mean?”

Scott shrugged in a way that spoke he thought what he was admitting wasn’t a big deal. Yep, clearly not with it, “Mission went bad… caught for a couple of weeks.”

Jeff was hoping his first fuck back on Earth, spoken to himself like right now or otherwise, would have been a comedic thing, but the way nausea rose in his throat said this was anything but funny.

Scott wanted to be in the Air Force. Badly. Who was a father to deny his son’s want to be part of such a noble cause? He gave him tips, took him to meet friends in high places, sometimes even sparred with him when he turned 18, but then Jeff was suddenly thousands of miles away with no hope of ever having the chance of sparring with his eldest again. Despite it, Jeff hoped Scott went on to become the best pilot the world has ever seen.

Part of this looks like he did, but at what cost?

As much as it felt like it did, the world didn’t stop spinning because you… well, we had lives we somehow wanted to continue living.

Aw hell, “Jesus, Scott…” Jeff couldn’t tell if it was the brashness or the lack of a nickname that made Scott flinch and he hated it. He immediately softened his tone and brought his 27-year-old child into his arms, “Shh, shh, we’ll be okay. We’ll figure this out.”

Like father like son, old habits die hard, and as easy as it was to still be able to comfort his children, Scott seemed to just as easily take it as he used to 8 years ago, “Alan doesn’t deserve this kind of hell, God, he’s barely not a kid anymore! Why--”

Jeff tightened his hold to keep his son in reality, and because he didn’t like the tone behind those words, “Hey, you didn’t either--”

Scott somehow managed to fling himself out of the hug, focus incredibly on point for someone who was doped up to his eyelids five seconds ago, “But I fucked up! I made the wrong call and then suddenly Arnold was dead and he had a wife and kids-- shit, what the hell did I do?”

Okay.

First of all: way to put him back in that headspace when that’s the exact opposite you were going for, Jeff, father of the year. Second: dammit. Just… dammit. This was a big fat hand grenade in a giant handbasket that they didn’t have time to gently get out while simultaneously not yanking the pin clean off with the grace of a drunk elephant. Jeff was no stranger to Survivor’s Guilt, but there was a whole untapped pile of metaphorical C4 within his son’s head that was ready for someone to push the goddamn button.

He wanted it to be him, desperately, because it sounded like he already failed his family enough, it was all he could do at this point, but he absolutely hated that he couldn’t do it right now. This was going to take a lot of time, which they didn’t have, plus, Jeff thought he had a pretty good understanding of this new Scott and the rest of his kids. Jeff was aware that if he didn’t help his sons find their baby as fast as possible over everything else it’ll lead to a fate nobody wanted.

A shaky sigh, “Okay, Scotty, let’s get you to bed. We’ll talk strategy in the morning.”

Scott simply nodded as his father flung Scott’s arm around his broader shoulders and picked him up. Slowly and painfully but surely, father and son meandered their way to Scott’s room. With a thump a little harder than Jeff wanted, Scott flopped down on top of his sheets and immediately started snoring. Despite everything that just happened, the father couldn’t help but grin at the sight. Well, there was another thing Jeff gracefully passed onto his son.

Jeff only took Scott’s shoes off. He would’ve loved to pull the sheets up around him too, but the father didn’t want to take any chances at waking him up. Slowly tip-toeing out of the room, Jeff gave one last glance back at his son before finally letting him be and gently shutting the door. He had three other sons he needed to console, but his tired joints told him to selfishly take a moment for himself for right now unless he wanted to collapse and give his family more to deal with.

Jeff eventually made his way to his room-- which was sadly unkempt, he noticed-- and sat down on the edge of his unfamiliar bed to think.

He’ll figure something out. If he had to crawl through images of his son being brutally and bloodily tortured then by God he would with the fury of a thousand suns.

He was back and he wasn’t going to throw away any second or even third chance he was given.

---

“I got him.”

Virgil turned his comms back on, and with it, Scott’s heart restarted for the first time in a few weeks. Taking a moment for a breather, Scott leaned against the wall while practically wheezing. They have him back, holy shit, they have him back. Scott vaguely heard Gordon cry in pure relief and joy. He saw John’s side of the comms flutter for a bit before a bright flash happened. Blinking away the white spots, Scott looked at his wrist to see a fully detailed map of the compound.

Gordon spoke what they were all thinking, “Woohoo! First Allie comes back, then Johnny-boy gets us a free ticket out of here! We’re winning this race, baby!”

A very loud moment of silence. John cleared his throat, “Actually, I was going to say glad to see you in one piece, you little shit,” a playful gasp came from Virgil’s side. It was too high pitched to be from the pianist’s mouth. Scott chuckled, but the paranoid part of his brain said John wasn’t done. His brain was right, ‘“But guys… that wasn’t me. Or EOS. We still haven’t found a way to get past the metal they made these walls out of.”

That silence was even more deafening than the last, and before Virgil could utter out his typical what the fuck, a small logo appeared at the corner of their new map. One that was all too familiar. The Chaos Crew wasn’t the only one who could brand their awful deeds.

Son of a bitch.

Virgil’s order over the radio was meant for Alan, but Scott couldn’t help but listen to it too.

“Shit, Alan, you need to run.”

Making quick work of the compound once more, Scott, while booking it even quicker than last time, opened a private line between him and Gordon, “Hey, how would you feel if I said go help Virgil while I cover Alan?”

The first response was stuttering, which Scott expected, but then it was followed up by something completely out of left field for Gordon, “... Okay, just as long as you promise to bring Alan back in one piece.”

Part of Scott wanted to console Gordon, another was questioning why Gordon was so quick to give up, another wanted to say of course, I will, idiot, but the first part that made itself verbal was easy, “You know I will, buddy.”

Scott could physically picture Gordon’s tiny, little, somber nod clear as day, “Sounds good, captain. See you on the other side.”

With a click, Scott was back on the group comm. Suddenly remembering what exactly his job was, he pulled out the map so graciously given to them by The Hood. Looking at all the dots, one was heading towards a prone one (oh if that asshole did anything to Virgil…) while another one was heading right for Scott himself. Actually, in just a few seconds, right as Scott rounded the corner he would--

“Woah, look out there, Tigger!”

Yes, you heard that correctly: not tiger, Tigger. Tigger hadn’t been used since Alan was itty bitty. It always seemed like the kid had endless energy with the way he wouldn’t stop bounding off the walls and furniture. Even as a baby, Lucy had to sit with him for a few hours while he slept in his crib to make sure he would stay there. In fact, their mother gave Alan that nickname herself. She was quite the Winnie the Pooh fan, and the rest of the family figured it would be one of the ways they could keep her legacy alive for the tiny potato.

Wrapping his arms around said flailing potato, albeit much bigger than a baby, Scott thought he would collapse then and there. Alan was here, in his arms, and yeah, the sight of his dirty and somewhat ripped up IR uniform made him mad, but Scott, for once in his life, decided to focus on the here-and-now, aka his precious, alive little brother, who finally stopped struggling at the realization that hey, the person holding you is a good guy, time to turn off fight mode.

Smushing their foreheads together as much as possible, Scott desperately fought to keep the waterworks back, a smile from ear to ear hopefully taking whatever energy his tear ducts had, “You are getting such an ass beating when we get home, little bro.”

Alan jumped back with a look of What the hell?! What did I do now?!

Scott simply rolled his eyes, “Really? “Not important”? You graduated high school, tiny dude! That’s huge! You remember Gordon’s party, right?”

Alan’s mouth gaped before he closed it with slightly puffy cheeks. Those same cheeks tinged with a small blush. Alan wasn’t exactly expecting to be smothered so soon (well, he did cry his eyes out on Virgil’s shoulder, but that was different!). Shaking it off, Alan moved his hands rhythmically and rapidly, To be fair, we weren’t sure he was going to get one for a while.

Scott faltered a little bit at the ASL. Darn, he should’ve seen Alan’s lack of talking from a mile away. Scott carefully hid his disappointment from Alan. Lord knew what the kid would take it as, “Yeah, that’s what he got for barely making it. Imagine what you’re going to get!”

Scott assumed his semi-fake charm worked, as Alan seemed to play along without any kind of suspicion, Oh yeah. Fair enough.

This kid, man.

Then, slow clapping came from a dark corner, making Scott’s heart leap out of his throat as well as push Alan behind himself. Glaring as much as he could towards the invisible evil-doer, Scott didn’t have to think twice, “Alan, take my map and find Virgil and Gordon.”

The youngest looked like he was going to object.

“Go.”

He no longer did. Good.

Listening to the field commander’s orders, Scott felt his wristband slip off his wrist and a warm body leave his vicinity. An inhale. Also good. An exhale, followed by an even darker glare, “What more do you want?”

Short and straight-to-the-point and angry, two things Scott typically wasn’t. Regardless, like a cold gust of wind, footsteps started approaching him from the shadow. Once Scott saw the outline of a body, he tensed even more. Virgil would snap at him for clenching his jaw so much.

A dark chuckle reminded him of what was important. The voice that spoke reminded him of something completely different, “Now then, brother, let’s not be rude to each other!”

Scott’s pupils shrunk at the familiar sight of Gordon stepping towards him. Except it wasn’t Gordon, because Scott knew that Gordon knew better. He also knew Gordon didn’t cheekily smile like that, even after a prank, nor did he walk that straight. He always had a funny walk after WASP, and Gordon wore that fact like a badge of honor.

Oh no, Scott definitely knew who this was, “What the hell are you playing at?”

Fake-Gordon rolled his eyes, like it wasn’t obvious, “I mean if we want to go that route, why did kid insist you being in the military was the coolest thing he’d ever heard you do? Maybe I wouldn’t have been pressured into joining a branch myself in the end.”

Scott’s nostrils flared, and by God, his pupils might have actually slitted like a snake’s, or possibly even a dragon’s, “Excuse me?”

Scott blinked, and suddenly he was met by not-Virgil, “Plus, why was our conclusion after hearing a three-year-old wanting to see snow to go to a ski resort? It had to have been those big, selfish, beady eyes, right?”

“C’mon, Scotty, we gotta give you some kind of calming exercise. There’s going to come a time when neither me or John are going to be there.”

“Hmm… does yoga work?”

A snort, “Well, that’s not too bad of an idea. Maybe the person pissing you off will stop whatever they’re doing at the sight of you spontaneously doing downward dog.”

Laughter, an unfamiliar action, “Yeah, okay, but for real, those breathing exercises I’ve seen you do look okay. Let’s start there.”

Scott was not a liar by heart. He had to admit that those exercises were doing jack shit right about now.

Another blink, another brother. Familiar ginger hair was all Scott could see, “To continue that previous point, why did Dad start International Rescue again? And what led to his demise?”

“Sounds like a piece of work. Why do you keep dealing with these people again?”

“Someone has to pay the bills, Johnny. Grandma’s too focused on making the perfect poison for us.”

A roll of eyes, “Right, because the billions we have saved wouldn’t be enough to last a couple of families a few lifetimes. Glad to see your calming exercises are working at least. How’s that going for you, by the way?”

A pause. A flicker of vision around the room. Someone cleared their throat, probably himself, “It’s probably not as bad as whatever space is throwing at you. You handling it okay up there?”

Another pause, followed by a sigh, “Well, since you asked so nicely…”

Scott wanted to deflect the truth so badly right now more than anything else. Telling him he couldn’t pilot ‘One anymore would be a much more enticing option than what he was hearing.

Suddenly, Scott was looking in a mirror, “Besides, I know more than anybody that he wasn’t wanted. A mistake. I thought we Tracys hated being imperfect?”

The Hood must have known their backstories from internet articles, and being the mastermind he was, it probably took him all of three seconds to see Alan had some hidden self-worth issues. By playing the biggest Guess Who? game of all time, The Hood was most likely able to figure out some less-than-positive ideals Alan thought about himself throughout his childhood and danced circles around his already weakened mind to string together some spineless blame to put on the kid by sheer evilness alone.

Knowing his kid brother, it worked.

Scott wasn’t thinking straight-- maybe even at all when the first punch was thrown.

Just like that, Scott blacked out and was running on terminator mode. John would be disappointed. Virgil would be horrified. Gordon might find it funny. Alan wasn’t here, and thank God for that. Scott wasn’t entirely sure what he was doing. All his mind was telling him was make lots of pain hard and fast. His brain also blocked out any hit The Hood was giving him in return. Pain flared for a few seconds, then it was swept away in the puddle of rage his mind was currently being consumed in.

Soon, his out-of-it mind found its target and gripped his-- The Hood’s arm, no disguise would make him have an identity crisis, thank you very much-- nice and rough.

Scott heard the familiar snap of cartilage and felt only partially bad. If he was thinking more clearly, he would be disgusted with himself. Yes, even The Hood didn’t deserve this level of Scott’s fury. Oh, he definitely deserved to be hit by a truck, but not by Scott. It was mostly due to Scott’s sanity. If he could be this graphic and violent at all, even to the worse possible criminals, that meant he could be that way during other moments, and that was not a territory he wanted to cross into.

Welp, he was here now, and he’ll hate to admit it in the future, but the only thing that brought him out of it was a tiny gasp from a few feet away. Snapping his head up, Scott’s eyes landed squarely on a smaller-than-normal Alan, who was currently clutching his arm to his chest in an emotion Scott didn’t want to figure out at the moment. So much for going and finding Virgil and Gordon.

“Allie, help…” fake him grunted out, only making real Scott growl and tighten his hold (and probably making his case worse). Looking up from the person in his arms, Scott felt his heart split in two at the sight. There was fear and uncertainty in Alan’s blue eyes and boy did it hurt. Scott couldn’t tell if it was because even seeing a potentially-fake Scott being beaten up was bad or if it was because he’d never seen big brother be this brutal, even towards their enemies. Whatever the reason, it involved Scott being the main root of the problem.

Wait, that was The Hood’s plan. Shit… make Scott act past the point of no return in a way that was unfamiliar to Alan so the kid couldn’t be fully sure who was who, and Scott fell right into his trap, hook, line, and sinker.

Fuck.

Bloody well done, Scott, you absolute moron.

Scott faltered a little bit, “A-Alan, I--”

That falter was enough for The Hood to break an arm out of his grip and elbow him in the face. In the brief second of freedom he had, he tried dashing towards Alan, but Scott was too quick for everyone’s good and soon had the imposter back in his arms, both of them struggling in a way that made them look like they were tied into the weirdest knot in existence.

Then, an earthquake struck.

No, literally.

A big shake of the abandoned compound threw the look-a-likes about and subsequently off the platform they were on. The place was old; it didn’t take a lot of weight for that guard rail they made their way over towards while fighting to snap right off. With a yelp, the two of them gripped the edge as much as they could and held on. Crap, I know we talked with Fuse about potentially setting some stuff off, but--

Blinking, Scott saw a familiar mop of blonde hair come into view. Alan was rather panicked, clearly not sure which Scott was the real Scott. Not only that, he had little time to decide which one to save. Goodie, another reason to despise The Hood: not only has he put Alan through weeks of torment, now he’s forcing the kid to decide to either save his oldest brother and biggest hero or his personal torturer.

And Alan won’t know until he picks.

Holy hell, this was getting worse by the second. Hopefully, big brother charm can work its magic and get them the hell out of there.

“Alan, quickly, over here!”

“I can’t hold on for much longer, Alan, hurry!”

The two Scotts glared at one another in the exact same way, not making Alan’s job much easier. Another shake, another slip down the metal cliff, more screams, and Alan looked ready to tear his hair out. Scott watched as the kid looked around rapidly, probably praying for a miracle in the process. Suddenly, the kid jumped when he must have spotted something important. Within the blink of an eye, he was gone and out of their range of visions to retrieve it.

Whatever the hell he noticed better be important, because if just ended up wasting precious time then--

Another shake, probably the last one. Still, it was enough.

Both their grips gave away at the same time, screams identical (God, did he always sound that wimpy?) as they plummeted to their demises. Scott was briefly able to look up to see his brother pop his head over the cliff like a chipmunk again and grab the (albeit broken) arm of The Hood and save him. Dammit, Scott should have expected that, though, that display of anger was uncharacteristic to Alan. Probably terrified him even more than he already was. Fuck, Scott deser--

Suddenly, a rope wrapped itself around Scott’s left arm and stopped his descent. Hard. Hopefully, it was only torn stuff, they didn’t have time to deal with dislocation--

Wait.

Scott wasn’t dead if he could think about these kinds of things.

Blinking, he looked at his arm to see the familiar rope of his grappling hook around his forearm. Moving his eyesight to look past that, he saw the wide, blue eyes of his baby brother struggling to stay on top. The Hood was using his non-broken side to try and climb his way back up to safety. Huh, that’s weird. When did Alan get ahold of that? Scott must have dropped it during his scuffle with--

That’s when it hit Scott.

Alan saved them both.

Alan saved them both.

And it would be all for jack shit if Scott didn’t get his ass up there to help.

Panicking, Scott gripped the rope and started to ascend. He had two working arms and a smother complex to boot; it wasn’t long before he overtook a struggling Hood, who could only use one arm and a weakened brother (that bastard was so lucky Alan had a literal heart of gold).

Flinging his arms over the edge and pulling himself up-- and shrugging off the extra help Alan offered. Save your strength, baby bro-- Scott was in a much calmer search-and-destroy mode. He yanked his evil look-a-like up, turned him on his stomach, pinned him down, and before he could even watch Alan blink, “Sign something.”

There, now he watched Alan blink.

Scott pulled out one of his best ‘big brother’ smiles ever, “Tell me something in ASL. I don’t think The Hood learned that kind of etiquette.”

The body beneath him growled, making Alan jump and Scott tighten not only his hold but his glare. Further prove big brother’s point, why don’t cha? He lost the angry look immediately to grin at Alan once more, who seemed to be slowly getting the picture. With a gulp, the blonde slowly strung together a sentence that Scott had to laugh at, just a little bit.

Damn, could you teach me to fight like that, Scooter?

Nodding his head, Scott had to concede, “Sure. Consider it a graduation present.”

Alan blinked again, and the immense relief that washed over the boy’s shoulders would be enough to banish nightmares for at least a couple of days. Suddenly, The Hood’s disguise blinked out of existence, making both brothers jump that time. Scott didn’t falter in his grip, however. This man was going down right here and now, Scott thought darkly, staring at the prone body beneath his.

Scott saw Alan continue to sign out of the corner of his eye, You know you look like shit, right?

Scott chuckled. Alan was always able to put a smile on his face no matter the circumstances, “Yeah, well, kindred spirits, little bro.”

Scott was probably as pale as Alan was with such lack of sleep and food. Running on what was essentially a prolonged PTSD attack wasn’t healthy in the slightest, and no doubt whatever kind of bruises and scratches The Hood gave him didn’t help, however, seeing hope fill those deep-blue eyes when Alan learned he was truly being saved drowned everything out, including the way those freckles were getting lost in those eye bags.

Yeah, their entire family probably looked like shit, and the recovery process was going to be even shittier, but they were going to suffer through it together as a family would.

That made it all worth it.

Shuffling himself so one arm was free while the other kept The Hood pinned, Scott held it out towards Alan. The flinch the youngest made tore a hole in Scott’s heart that was only slightly patched when Alan leaned into the warmth and safety of his biggest bro. Long recovery process, remember? Regardless, Alan still took to the hug like a dehydrated zebra did a pond, and that was good enough for Scott.

The Hood groaned underneath them.

Yep, good enough.

[cloudbeom]

Spring day | PJM

Pairing: Park Jimin x sister reader

Request by: L I E on my quotev  !

Genre: angst; comfort :")

Tw : mentions of self ham

Summary: jimin left you once, but once he found out what that caused, he vows to never do the same mistake again

a/n: ive experienced self harm a while back and it sucks to have the scars that wont heal anymore, so i hope you know there are better ways to cope with sadness. please know that bts's music from love yourself is specifically for loving yourself, they made that for you. it was not a marketing strategy to target depressed people, they made that for you all to help you, so dont let them down, and dont give up on yourself, okay? love yourself. dont forget namjoon said that we helped them love themselves, so now its our turn to use their love for us. stay healthy, everyone . i promise there will be better days ❤

it was the first day of spring, Jimin was coming back from Seoul to Busan and you were so excited to be seeing your older brother again.

The good thing about spring was that it was cold, so there was no reason for you to be showing skin outside--(which was where you and Jimin had planned to spend the whole day; there was a spring festival going on)

Jimin had arrived at crack ass of dawn, so you hadn't been awake at the time of his arrival, but thankfully you were awoken when he had opened the door and it creaked too loudly, and thankfully to you, you were a very light sleeper.

you had ran up and screamed, immediately tackling your older--now blonde - brother in a hug, and Jimin silently giggles, his shoulders shaking, as he wraps his long arms around you as well.

things were going normally for the two of you as the week went by, Jimin was quick to assume you were fine.

but actually, you were far from it.

the scars that littered your arms was a constant reminder on what had happened to you when Jimin left, his fans threatening you, calling you names and insulting you directly through social media. His sasaengs contacting you, asking for your address, you lived in constant fear. fear of what would happen if you obeyed them, not only Jimin would get hurt, but you, and your family would too.

but you didn't want to show Jimin that, you didn't want to show him how weak you are. he was only going to be there for a week, so you decided to make it count.

you should have known that Jimin was family, and no matter how well you'd hide it, he's still find out one way or another. Unfortunately, it had to be today.

"(Y/n)? Park (Y/n)? helloooooo, earth to (Y/n)??" your older brother calls out when you spaced out, he grabs both of your cheeks with his cold hands to grab your attention, "(Y/n)!"

"What? what is it?" You say, startled, "Oh my God, your hands are cold!" you hiss to him, and he laughs.

"Come on, they sell ice cream there, let's get something!" Jimin says, pointing to an ice cream truck that had parked under a tree that was covered in snow, "My treat," he smiles

"Sure, get me mint chocolate," You say, and Jimin scrunches his nose

"Gross! you're just like Jeonggukie and Hoseok, always eating toothpaste," he says, and you laugh at the mentions of his band mates who were also your friends, Jimin then takes out his wallet, "But since you're my annoying sister, I'll spare you. Stay here and I'll get them!" he says, pulling your arm towards a vacant tree and pushing you down to sit before skipping away.

you sat yourself down on the snow covered grass and breathed shakily, gently peeling your sleeve down. It had stung when Jimin pulled you, the cuts weren't fully healed yet and your jacket had rubbed on the scarred skin enough to make you wince, but thankfully, your older brother didn't notice. you pulled your sleeve back down.

Just as you were about to stand back up, a shadow loomed over you.

"That was quic-"

"You fucking bitch!" someone yelled, yanking you by your hair, and you yelped, "So you we're Jimin oppa's girlfriend all along weren't you?!"

You felt tears pooling your eyes at the sudden physical pain. At the mention of Jimin's name, you quickly pieced together that it was one of his delusional fans, you listened to her yelling, and under different circumstances, you would've gagged hearing her call you your own brother's 'girlfriend'.

doesn't this girl see you looked alike?

blinded by rage, she starts to grab at your chin to force you to look at her, she had a scowl on her face and she was pissed.

"Answer me, you fucking bitch!" she yells into your face, her hand strikes for your cheek and you let out a chocked sob, "He doesn't deserve you!"

her hands raise again, and you flinched, but frantic shouting startles you from behind.

"Stop that! let my sister go!" Jimin says, panicked. he drops both of the ice creams in his hands and came running to you, pushing the girl away and stepping in between you two, a heroic yet extremely stupid act on his own behalf. People could've crowded around and took pictures of the act he was putting up, but thankfully the park was mostly empty on a bleak, cold day such as this. "What do you think your doing?!"

The girl, now completely in a daze, because not only did her idol had just pushed her, ('touched her', you can almost hear her delusional mind think that way) , but he had also yelled at her for hurting his sister, sister.

"O-Oppa, I'm s-"

"Go away! just leave us alone, please!" Jimin yelled, but sounded pleading and on the verge of his own tears as he outstretched his arms in an attempt to hide your frame. The girl had no choice but to bow and leave. 

silence followed suit, then Jimin turns around and drops on his knees, pushing your hair from your face, "Let me see you-"

"I'm fine," you say, pushing him off, but your brother was adamant.

"(Y/n), I saw her fucking grab you, stop being so stubborn!" Jimin curses desperately, and his eyes widen when he realised he lashed out, "I didn't mean that, (Y/n),"

You sighed in defeat. Jimin looked so stressed already, so you let him. You shut your eyes as you felt tears resurfacing as he searched your face for bruises, and then your hands.

he had lifted up your sleeves, something you wished he would stay away from. And naturally, he froze at what he found. 

You knew he would've seen it, you just didn't know it would've been today. 

"(Y-Y/n)... she...she didn't do this, did she?.." Jimin asked, his voice was trembling at the sight of the scars on his baby sister's arms, "This was...t-this is you, isn't it?"

you couldn't lie to him, you couldn't. so you nodded slowly, tears starting to stream down your cold, flushed cheeks.

and finally, finally, you broke down.

"That wasn't my first time, hyung, that wasn't my first time getting harassed. s-some of them know i'm your sister, some of them are still out there, some of them are out there to kill me, just because- because I'm related to you!" you sobbed, and Jimin's anger turned to sympathy, to guilt as he pulled you into his arms, letting you cry, "I d-didn't choose to be your sister, hyung, i didn't... but they- they dont fucking get it! I-I don't know wh-what they wan't, mom and dad keep comparing me to you- i'm not smart or pretty or successful, I'm not like you! I'm-"

"Park (Y/n)," Jimin coos gently, one of his hands reaching out to stoke your hair. Jimin had a smile, but tears were uncontrollably streaming down his cheeks.

this was all his fault, Jimin was living the best life in Seoul, and he completely didn't know you we're struggling on your own here, in Busan, his hometown, the place where you both grew up, the place he left for his career.

he chased his dreams, and at the same time, he ruined yours. he would never forgive himself if he didn't make it right.

"Listen to me, (Y/n)," Jimin starts, trying to sound strong, but his own voice betrays him as it breaks, sharing the pain his baby sister felt as you kept crying into his arms, "You're coming to Seoul with me after this, okay? I'll take care of you, I'll take care of you from now on,"

"I-I can't leav-"

"That's my final decision, (Y/n)," Jimin says, softly running his hands on your arms, biting his lip to stop it from quivering, "I'm your brother, and I already gave up on you once by leaving you. I'm not going to do that again,"

You couldn't find your voice to reply as you sobbed and sobbed to your brother, but Jimin didn't seem to mind as he lets out his own tears.

he hopes one day, he'll help you heal. Just like how spring comes by after the winter, the season where flowers start to bloom again.

[mare-sanguis]

Winston/Monty part 10

They left the cafe around 1:15 and walked down to the police station.

And they were finished after two hours later. Scott gave the cop informations about who was involved in this cover up- this time, he believe them. They also went through the evidence one more time.

Now Scott was sitting in he waiting room, while Winston was still with the officer.

"[...] And we found something in his jail cell- and I think its adressed towards you."

"What is it?"

The officer opened a drawer and took out a tiny plasic bag with something inside of it which resembled a letter.

"Its a letter. You shouldnt read it here- take it home with you."

"As you say so. Can I go now?"

"You can leave- yes."

Winston left the office room and went back to Scott.

"What took you so long?"

"The cop gave me something- I have to read it now. Cant stand waiting until I'm home."

"Do you really think you should read it here? Maybe its something serious."

"I'll do it anyway."

"Then at least sit down you dont look so good."

Winston nooded and set down next to him, they were the only one in this room.

He pulled the bag open and took the letter out, then started to read it after folding it open.

His eyes started to fill with tears.

The letter read:

"Winston... You dont deserve any of thie and I am so sorry. I am a piece of shit. Please... you deserve so much better. Find someone new someone who makes you happy. Not like me. You deserve better- forever. I still woder why you wated me around. I still wonder whats so special about me... I fucking love you so much but we will never see each other again."

Winstons hands were shaking- Scott noticed it.

"No..." Winston whispered.

"No. Why would he.... write something like that...?"

"What is it...?" Scott carefully asked.

"That... I think... thats a suicide note. Montys suicide note..."

Scott couldnt believe what Winston just said.

"Are you sure...? I mean [...]" but he got interrupted by loud, desperate sobs.

"Winston- ... hey. Its all right..." he reached out to touch his shoulder. The last time he had heard someone crying like this was at Jeffs funeral. And this was a long time ago.

"We should get you home. This is not the best place to let out your emotions."

"I cant drive.. like this"

"Glad you have me with you."

He carefully took the letter out of Winstons hand and folded it together again, put it back in the bag.

"I'll drive."

Winstons was still sobbing- loudly.

Scott stood up and reached for his hands as he noticed that Winston was glowing- he softly touched his forehead

"Goddamn- you're hot- Like... you have a fucking fever and still dare to come over. You're crazy."

Winston stil said nothing- instead just stood up.

"Probably because of all this stress."

"Right. Don't lie- when was the last time you slept?"

"Don't know. Maybe 3 or 4 days ago."

"And the last time you ate something?"

"3 to 4 days."

"Don't do that to yourself. He didnt want you to end like this:"

He took Winstons hand and they went outside.

"Where'd you parked your car?"

"Across the street."

He handed Scott his car keys- hands still shaking.

"When we're home- get some sleep. No one wants to see you like this. Not Monty"

They drove home in silence and arrived in silence. Every now and then, Scott glanced over to him to make sure he's still alive. Sometimes, he saw tears running down his face.

"We're here. Should I carry you piggypack into your house?"

Winston laughed a weak laugh.

"No I think I can walk by myself."

"I trust you."

He slowed down his steps and Winston followed him inside.

"Such a huge home- would totally get lost in it."

"Monty got lo here his first time..." his voice broke. "that... was kinda cute."

"I can imagine that. He was so lost. Anyway... its bedtime for you. Sleep as long as you want to while I make something to eat for you."

"Sure...?"

"Yes. I dont have anything to do anyway. Besides getting lost in this house. So its no big deal"

"The kitchen is on the left side. Good luck finding it."

He walked upstairs and left Scott alone.

After he succsessfully found the kitchen, he quickly started to look through the supplies.

"I should probably get him something warm to drink"

He made him some tea and walked upstairs.

"All these many doors- how should I find him?"

He sighed and noticed a door half closed. He walked towards it and opened it quietly.

"Winston? You awake?"

No response. He was already asleep.

"Gonna leave this here."

He out the cup on the nightstand next to his bed.

"And this too."

He put the bag with Montys note in the nightstan. Before he left he room he checked on Winston, put his hand on his forehead- he was still glowing like hell.

"Totally relatable- was the same back then."

He sighed and left the room.

"Maybe I should get him some medicine."

One hour later, he was back again at the house after he left to buy some meds.

He placed the bag at the kitchen counter and started to prepare the food, as he heard footsteps

"Winston? Up again?"

He nooded, still looking weak.

"You shuld go back to sleep."

"Can't"

"Why not?"

"Not feeling like it anymore."

"If you say so.. but dont fall asleep right here."

"Won't"

"All right then. Take a seat- your personal slave will do some magic."

"I'll wait like the good kid I am."

Scott smiled and turned his back at him. starting to make him some good meal.

"And I bought you some meds. Take them after you ate. They'll probably knock you out for good."

"You thought about everything- dont you?"

"Well- being friends with someone like Monty had some benefits. Not everytime- but sometimes when he got into fights with his dad he came up to me and I took care of his problems. The time his dad broke his arm I went to the hospital with him."

"Sounds like you delt with his trouble very often."

"Oh yeah- but he never notice. At least it looked like he denied the fact that I cared. I told him to give up Bryce, telling him to stop defending him- all because I cared. I just wanted the best for him."

"We both wanted."

Scott nooded.

"8 moth ago we had spring fling. He wasnt ther and neither was I. So I invited him over. If I remember correctly he was in a pretty dark place at that moment, kinda disturbed. Now I know why. He kept behaving strange. I wanted him to stay overnight but he didnt want to."

"What a caring sweet boy you are." Winston said, in a soft serious way.

"Stop joking." he smiled.

"I mean it. You even make meals like a good housewife."

Scotts smile faded a bit. But Winston couldnt see it because he still had his back turned at him.

"I'm used to it too."

"Oh? Really?"

"Yes."

They went silent for some minutes and Scott placed the plate full of food on the table.

"Looking good- where'd you learn these skills?"

Scott sat down, across from Winston.

"Everytime we went to a party I stayed at a friends house overnight- he always had kinda bad hangovers. So one day I started this all- and it somehow became a tradition."

"Whos this mysterious friend you're always talking about? Is it the one Sheri mentioned?"

"Yes:"

Silence again.

"So... whats up with this friend? Whats his name again?"

"Jeff."

"Yeah- why dont you want o visit him?"

"Theres no reason to visit him. Theres no one to visit."

Winston tilted his head slightly.

"What did Sheri mean with "We all three lost someone who meant much to us?""

This time, Scotts hands were shaking and he felt like he was about to cry.

"Because Jeff died on September the 9th, 2017. Death cause was a car accident."

Winston stopped breathing for some seconds. Totally unable to say anything.

"Oh... I'm so sorry- I shouldnt have pushed you to tell me."

"Its fine. How'd you know anyway..."

"Thats why you dont want to visit him?"

"No. Its not. I..." he took a deep breath. "I just feel like I completely failed him."

"Why would you say that?"

"Like I said- He knew Monty, introduced me to him. After I transferred to Liberty I started to get to know him better... thats what I already told you. But theres more to it. Jeff told me I should keep an eye on him. He didnt want to be around them anymore - I dont blame him - instead he told me to take care of him. I really tried my best and I tried even more after Jeff died. And now.... that Monty is dead too I feel like thats on me. He would've never snapped if somebody was there for him that day Bryce broke up their friendship... that day he assaulted Tyler. And because no one was there he did it. I was supposed to be there for him. Monty went to jail and died there- lonely, felt like he was all alone. There were signs written all over... he felt lost. After he told his dad. He still would be alive if I had tried harder. And he would've got the help he needed. From you, from me."

Winston listened in silence.

"I failed completely"

"No. You didnt. Like you said to me .... you did the best you could. ut it was a hard task, to pull him out of the darkness... impossible for just one guy to handle."

Scott buried his face in his hands to stop his eyes from tearing up.

"If you want you can stay over tonight. I wont kick you out. we both have things to work through. And we should stay out of school tomorrow."

Finally Winston knew why he was so desperate for the truth to come out.

[voidsfanficfortress]

Attention!, this is gemsonas x oc!, nones of them are related to the Main characters of Steven universe, Keep scrolling of you dont like IT!

Also!, gericho's house is like stevens almost!

_________________________

- what are you doing here human?-

The off color sugalite asked, holding the Tiny fleshy human ,who stood there amazed by the two beautiful Gems infront of them.

The human girl, brushed her stray locks away from her face, forgeting almost to actually answer the question,trying to find the words.She shakes her head, making eyecontact with the Giant woman that was holding her.

-i was just strolling down the beach, when I found this place, it got my atenttion and...-- wait, you two live here?-

Both gems look at eachother, then to the cave , back to the human.

-yes, we do 'live in here ' as you humans would say- the sardonyx says.

- for the love of god,donnie- the sugalite complains- please dont speak so weird ,youre gonna scare her!-

-what is wrong with my way of speaking,suga ?-the coral gem asks.

-its just so weird!-

-ahem- both women look at the human- dont you wanna just, come and live with me?, this place is cold, wet, and the floor seems unconfortable to sleep in!-

- we ...we uh-donnie says, scratching the back of her neck, looking at her fellow gem, whispering- I I dont really like living here...-

Sugalite sighs, and nodds.

-yes, we Will, youre lucky we like you, punk-

Suga leaves the human on the ground, their bodys shine, their Gems wiggle until they transform into a tall human size,then, they make their way by the shore.

-i've seen more of your kind, you guys are amazing, but, and if you dont mind me asking, why do you guys have two gems each?, are you a 'fusion'?-

Sugalite opens her mouth, but the sardonyx cuts her before she can speak.

-We are off color gems, created by the diamonds with the sole purpose of maximazing gem power by possesing two gems, but, because of that, we are unestable, thats why our colors dont match with our 'normal ' counterparts-

The girl processes the information,looking at the both of them, then she speaks again.

-and how you guys ended down here?-

-well,- the sardonyx said- its kind of difficult--

-ill tell you how- the sugalite interrupted,her tone much lower her usual- we were in the army, I...I had to shatter a newborn off color gem, And...and I just couldnt, so we left her free,our superiors left us, then gave the order to shatter us...so we flet to earth..-

-hey i...I didnt want to touch something so sensible, i--

- its okay, youre the only one who didnt judge us.., we appreciate it..

- also, whats your name?-donnie asks.

-my Friends call me gericho-

- I didnt thought human names could be so diverse!-

[Time skips]

-here we are!, make yourself comfy, want hot chocolate?-

-hot choco-- what?-sardonyx asks,dumbfoded .

-Yes yes!-suga exclaims excitedly- with marshmellows!-

-coming up!,donnie?,want some?-

-i guess it would be nice to taste something else than rocks for one day..-Then she cackles loudly, making the gir a bit unconfortable,cringing a bit, the gem notices it- whats the matter hun?-she asks worriedly.

-its just that I dont really like loud noises they make me unconfortable-

And before she can say anything else,the sardonyx hugs her, squeezing her as she mutters a sorry.

The girl smiles and hugs back, caressing the back of the gem.

-youre soft-

The gem instantly heats up and suga starts to laugh like a maniac , stomping her fist on the table.

-I have never, ever see you like that donnie!,oh my god- sugalite says trough laughter.

-You are an ass-donnie sputter as she drank the hot chocolate,giving a cup to the purple gem.

- yet you have been sticking with me all this time..-

The two gems share a laugh, the human just stares at nothing,the calm mood makes her feel good, sardonyx and sugalite feel the same, both of them talk a about homeworld, how it was, their time in the army, until night falls.

Then after a quick dinner , bedtime arrives,the Gems take the sofa, fixing their forms into the shape of the furniture.

[...]

Rays of sunshine comes in trough the windowpanes, Gericho grunts, hearing the soft clinking of the cups.

She drags herself out of bed, going down the small set of stairs to the kitchen,there its donnie, making breakfast for the human, who sat on the chair, as the gem puts the Plate Infront of her, Fried eggs and bacon, with a cup of tea.

-Made specially for you..!-

Sardonyx tries to be carefull not to waken the other gem up.

-And Suga?-

-Shes sleeping -

- Tell her I say goodmorning-G said , eating her breakfast- I have to leave to work.., if anything comes up, call me, my cellphone number is on one of the fridges magnets-

Sardonyx nodds and smiles, putting her head on her hands, as her elbows ,then she proceeds to speak.

-welp, I have to go now, thanks for the breakfast,it tastes amazing, goodbye donnie-

Gericho kisses her on her forehead,right on her gem- see you later!-

Then the human grabbs her bag and runs to the main door.

-Bye!-

Then the door is slam shut.

[...]

The day goes by painfuly slow, a huge worrying swept over gericho.

' Sardonyx hasnt called me yet, hope everythings fine back there...'

She thinks , sipping from her tea, as a couple of animators comes in,then its time to work.

Working in an animation studio was fun, specially when all the people working there were just as excited as she was, all passionate for the proyect.

Eventually, its time to go home,evening was just around the corner when the human entered the house.

Then she is enveloped in four huge arms, who hugged her tightly , a soft sobbing noise , and sugalite who was muttering ' youre back '

-Hey hey hey!, What happened?-she asks , no answer is given-suga, baby whats wrong?...-she lifts the gems head by her chin- are you okay?-

The gem takes a bit to answer, but eventually she does- I..Im okay, its just, when I woke up, you werent here, and sardonyx told me you left for something important...and and you were taking so long that I feared the worst!-

-its alright honey- G says, caressing suga's hair- its alright, ive should've left a note- finally, sugalite calms down, and nodds, then she recomposes herslef, lifting the human off her feet- where is donnie?-

-Shes sleeping, she figured youll be back late so she went to sleep-

-So thats why she didnt called me in all day!-

-Wait...-suga says- Youre telling me that I could've called you, and spare all the worrying?-

-Yeah, Pretty much....-

Suga's eye starts twitching.

-before I do something stupid-the gem says- I heard there are more of us west from here, maybe we can go and check if they are okay- G agrees- now, if youll excuse me...- she leaves the human on the ground, and from her gems a maze comes out- SARDONYX!-

Gericho just sighs.

- well....I better get the first aid...-

-☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆-

-Void

[watchmegetobsessed]

Shawn Mendes // Boundaries Part 12

yoooo im back with a new part!! okay this sounded like im a shitty rapper.. im really losing my shit lately over school but whatever... anyway, enjoy! shower me with your thoughts!

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 - Part 8 - Part 9 - Part 10  - Part 11

I’m an emotional wreck when I get into the car and Nick greets me with a friendly smile. The silence is comforting, though I miss the country music Shawn used to play every time he was in a good mood.

I’m not a nail biter, but I nibble on them as we are getting closer and closer to Shawn’s place and I’m trying to come up with a plan on how I want to do it. Should I just blurt it out or should I build it up properly like a speech that ends with me telling him that he is going to be a father?

None of the options seem to be right, so after a while I give up and decide to just go with the flow.

When Nick rolls into the garage my nerves are exploding and my hands are shaking when I get out of the car. I take the elevator and I feel like my stomach was left in the garage when the elevator moved up.

The door opens and I walk into the familiar apartment. I hear his singing voice coming from the kitchen even before I could see him and it immediately brings a smile to my lips. I don’t know what I was expecting to see or how I imagined our first meeting after our emotional goodbye, but it feels… normal.

I walk into the kitchen and he looks up at me from the instant soup he is making and a wide smile dances to his beautiful face. He looks just as handsome as I remembered, his hair is now a bit longer, a curl is dancing on his forehead with every movement, but it’s beyond adorable. I have to fight the urge to curl it to my finger.

“Hi!” he greets me and stepping closer he pulls me into a hug, and I feel like I’m finally safe and home.

“Hi,” I whisper against his hoodie as I wrap my arms around his waist. Smelling his scent makes is even harder to peel myself off of him when it’s long over the friendly duration for the hug. “Instant soup, huh?” I ask hoping to make myself forget about the aching pain in my chest that I’m feeling now that he is standing next to me again.

“I don’t have lunch or dinner dates anymore, so I’m more often stuck here alone. And I’m still not a chef,” he chuckles shaking his head.

“Ordering is still an option, you know?”

“I… haven’t been quite in the mood to talk to strangers, not even a delivery guy,” he mumbles anxiously as he puts a spoon into the soup and stirs it. Steam is dancing above the bowl indicating that it’s still pretty hot, so he doesn’t attempt to taste it, just lets it sit on the counter.

I can relate to how he is feeling and I’m surprised he shared this detail with me. I was afraid he would be distant and sullen with me, but his honesty is calming me.

“Do you want a glass of wine or something?” he asks walking over to the fridge. I almost say yes immediately, some alcohol would definitely work for me, but then I realize that I can’t. Because there is a teeny-tiny baby in my stomach now.

“Um, no thank you,” I shake my head and watch him grab a water for both of us.

“So, not that I’m rushing you, but I’m really curious about what you wanted to talk about.”

We make ourselves comfortable on the couch and I feel my anxiety coming over me. I have no idea how to do it, but I can’t just blurt it out. I need time to think.

“I… I’ve been missing you.”

He gives me a doubtful look and I’m afraid he can see through me, but then he doesn’t question if this was my original intention. But I start talking again just to be sure.

“I’ve been thinking about you a lot and I just couldn’t get you off of my mind. I know I was the one who wanted to end everything, but… I guess I can’t do it.”

I feel horrible. I should have told him straight away instead of talking bullshit. Well, okay, it’s not bullshit, it’s true, I’ve been missing him as hell, but this is not why I came here.

He runs his hand through his hair and I think back of the time I used to do this without a second thought. Now I’m sitting next to him with a decent gap between us, so our legs can’t touch.

“I missed you too, Naya. So much. But… what do you want to do? I mean… I’m happy to start seeing you again, but we have to figure this out, how we want to make it work.”

I nod with a blank stare and I don’t know what I can say. If I don’t tell him about the pregnancy test I’m just fucking everything up, making him believe things are turning right and we can start over again, when truth is, everything is about to turn upside down.

For my luck, his phone starts ringing somewhere in his room and he excuses himself rushing into the room to answer the call.

I growl angrily as I reach for my bag and grab the test. I stare at it and can’t help but grimace. What am I doing here? I can’t ruin his life, I was the stupid one who forgot to take the pill, so it’s all my fault. A child would blow up his whole life and I can’t put up with the thought of messing everything up for him. I shouldn’t have come here.

I jump when I realize he is walking out of his room and in my sudden confusion I tug the stick to my coat’s pocket hiding it as I jump to my feet. I have to leave before I fuck something up.

“Where are you going?” he asks with raised eyebrows.

“I-I gotta leave. I’m sorry.” I mumble nervously as I head to the elevator, but he grabs my arm and… and everything happens too fast.

His grip is not too hard, but it’s strong enough to pull my hand out of the pocket and the stick slides out with it as well. It falls to the floor and the clinking makes me jump. I totally freeze right at that moment, giving Shawn the chance to reach for it.

As I watch him pick the test up from the floor I hold my breath and pull my shoulders up, as if I’m afraid he is about to explode. He hold it between his fingers, stares at it for the longest few seconds before his eyes slowly move up to my face. I’m biting my lips, feeling the tears dwelling in my eyes.

Why didn’t I put the damn test back into my bag? Why am I such an idiot?

“Shawn, I-“ I start, but I don’t get to finish, he cuts me off.

“Is this yours?” he asks in a firm voice. I nod.

“I took it this morning. I threw up last night and realized I’ve been late for over a week, so I bought the test and…”

“Did you do it on purpose?” I hear his next question and the words freeze to my tongue.

“What?” I manage to say.

“Did you get pregnant on purpose? Were you planning on it?”

His expressions are hard, he seems mad and it’s scary to see him like this. I didn’t want to upset him and his questions catch me off-guard. I stare at him in disbelief, but it soon turns into anger. How can he think I did this on purpose?

“Sure, I thought it would be fun to mess up my and your life as well!” I snap back angrily. “Of course I didn’t! I forgot to take the damn pills!” I growl as I snatch the test from his hand. Now I’m raging and I’m offended by the accusation.

“You told me not to worry about it! And yet, you have a positive pregnancy test in your bag now!” he retorts just making it even worse.

“I’m sorry, I was too busy trying not to fall apart! I’m sorry I’m human! But if you think I did this on purpose then I’m leaving now. It was a mistake to come here.”

I turn around furiously, but he grabs my arm again holding me back. When I turn back to him his face is completely changed. He doesn’t seem mad anymore, more like… desperate.

“Hey, hey, hey. I’m sorry! I didn’t… I just- I’m in shock, okay? I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“And you think I’m not shocked?” I scoff in disbelief. “This morning I found out that I’m pregnant, I came here to find comfort and maybe to find out what we should do now, and then you accuse me of doing it on purpose!” Tears are running down on my cheeks and though I try to push him away, he pulls me to him and closes his arms around me no matter how badly I’m trying to get away from him. “I’m so fucking shook, I’m terrified and I really thought seeing you would make me feel better, but I’m still so afraid.”

Now I’m full on crying, I’m sobbing into his shirt but he doesn’t seem to care. His strong arms hold me tight to his body and I just want to stay like this forever. He is stroking my hair gently, soothing me without letting go of me. I’m glad he is holding me because my knees feel like jelly.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you, I wasn’t thinking. It’s okay baby,” he whispers into my hair pressing a kiss to my temple.

“I’m sorry for raging so bad. I’ve been on an emotional rollercoaster in the last 24 hours,” I mumble wiping my tears off of my face, but I know my eyes has already swelled and as red as a tomato.

“It’s fine. Come on, let’s sit down and talk, okay?”

I nod my head and he pulls me back to the couch. He gently takes my coat off and sitting down he pulls me close, circling an arm around my shoulders. His body’s heat is attracting me like I’m a bug and he is the only light in the room. I cuddle to his side and enjoy the momentary silence as I slowly realize I’m somehow relieved. The secret is out, he knows about the test, now we can focus on figuring out everything else.

“I’m sorry about the pill. I should have been more careful, it’s my fault,” I mumble and looking up at him I my gaze meets his soft eyes. All the anger and doubt is gone by now, I have my soft Shawn back, thanks God.

“Don’t say that. I should have been more persistent about using a condom too. We are in this together. But we really have to figure out the next step.”

“The next step is that I have a doctor’s appointment for tomorrow. These test are pretty reliable, but I need to see a professional as well.”

“Cancel the appointment, I’ll get you one in a private hospital. They are very trustworthy and we can sneak in without getting noticed.”

I don’t protest, I’m more than happy to keep it a secret for as long as possible. The last thing I need is to get recognized as I’m going to the gynecologist with Shawn.

“And we have to tell at least Andrew. He would kill me if something got out without him knowing about it.”

“He is going to hate me for life,” I sigh sadly, shutting my eyes closed. He runs his hand up and down my arm soothingly.

“Hey, don’t worry. Andrew is a smart guy, he doesn’t hold a grudge for nothing. And as I said, I was there too when…” His other hand gently slips under my sweater to my stomach. “When this baby thing happened. You remember?”

His playful smile calms me a bit. I’m suddenly very aware of his warm palm on my stomach and it’s so strange, to think about the tiny baby in my stomach.

“Shawn?” I speak up after a few silent moments.

“Hm?”

“I’m scared.” My voice is just a dying whisper and the damn tears are flowing again from my eyes, I can’t help it. Startled from my sudden mood change he sits straight up so he can look into my eyes, he cups my face in his hands and runs hid thumbs across my cheeks.

“Don’t be. It’s going to be alright. I’m not letting you do this alone, okay?” I nod my head sniffing like a little child. “I know it’s very sudden and scary, but you are not alone. I’m here and we are in this together.”

Now I’m crying because he is the sweetest person alive. His kind and soothing words comfort me like nothing on the world and even though this is a shitty situation I’m still happy I get to do this with him.

“I just… Don’t feel like I’m ready for this,” I choke out shaking my head.

“You will be ready for this when the time comes. I know we can make this work, okay? Just… don’t give up. We have someone else to think about now,” he lets out a small chuckle making me laugh through my tears.

Thanks to the emotional shock we both went through we doze out on the couch soon. When I open my eyes it’s already dark outside, meaning I spent almost half of the day napping with Shawn on his couch. His arms are hugging me protectively as he is spooning me from behind. I don’t want to wake him up, but one, I really have to pee and two, it’s time for me to leave, I don’t intend to spend the night here. Our situation doesn’t mean we are back on track.

I successfully peel myself out of his grip and make it to the bathroom. After quickly taking care of my business I check on him, he is still sleeping, now hugging a pillow to his chest. I take a moment to admire how peaceful he looks right now. No drama, no worries, just his angelic face that I still love so dearly.

As I feel myself getting emotional I turn away and grabbing my stuff I leave. I don’t call for Nick, I get a cab and head home.

I guess my message is clear to Shawn, he doesn’t call me that day. In the morning he texts me that he is picking me up at the café to go to the clinic and he also lets me know we are having a meeting with Andrew and Justin later, though I have no idea who Justin is. Definitely not Bieber.

Elisa is not home when I wake up, I’m thankful I don’t have to face her, she knows me too damn well and I know it would take one look and she would know something is off. I need more time to figure things out.

I have a beanie on and my scarf is covering half my face so I’m not recognizable. From my previous month spent with Shawn I expect him to be distant and moody after I left without a word yesterday, but I guess the situation is different now. I’m welcomed with a bright smile as I sit into the car.

“Hey, how are you feeling?” he asks me kindly.

“Um, fine. I was a bit nauseous in the morning, but I’m better,” I sigh tiredly. I leave out the part where I spent ten minutes kneeling next to the toilet because I was pretty close to throwing up. “Who is this Justin we are meeting later?” I ask.

“Justin Stirling. He is in my team, he has been doing a lot of marketing stuff for me lately, but he was busy with family stuff last month.”

I nod my head noting the information. The rest of the car ride is spent in silence. I feel so strange, before this whole pregnancy drama Shawn was always the dominant one, especially because he was kind of my boss. But now he looks so lost and confused, my news yesterday must have thrown him over the edge. He is looking out for my every mood and it’s starting to make me feel uncomfortable.

We make it into the clinic without anyone noticing us. This is definitely not how I imagined my first trip to the doctor when I become pregnant. It’s far from idyllic, I’m nervous, my hands are shaking so I hide them in my pocket, Shawn is like a jumpy kid, looking out for everything around us.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Hosier, please, come in,” the doctor greets us. She is a lovely middle-aged woman with a warm smile which is quite calming. We follow her into the room and while I sit up on the white bed Shawn takes place next to me. “So tell me, what do we know so far?” she asks as she is getting ready for my examination.

“Um, I’ve been late for about nine days now, in the past two days I’ve been feeling nauseous and I threw up once. I took a test and it came out positive.” I’m nervous to talk about it with Shawn right next to me, but I try not to think about it.

“Okay. Any pain maybe in the lower stomach?”

“No,” I shake my head.

Soon my pants and underwear comes off and I sit with my legs up while Dr. Hosier is facing my lower half. She keeps asking me questions, I just stare up at the ceiling and answer them like a robot. Shawn looks tensed as he is looking at the doctor.

“I’m going to do an ultrasound quickly,” she informs me she helps me put my legs down. I’m trying to breathe evenly as she pours some jelly on my stomach and starts roaming it with that… something. I don’t even know what these things are, this is how unprepared I am!

All three of us is staring at the screen that is filled with black and white void, I don’t see anything, but the Dr. Hosier freezes the picture and puts a circle around a teeny-tiny dot in the lower part of the image.

“Well, I have news. You are in fact pregnant, Miss Duvall and that little dot is the baby.”

I guess she can sense how unwelcomed the situation is, so she keeps her congrats to herself. She quickly tells me that we need to reserve another appointment soon, she talks about vitamins and useful information while I wipe my stomach clean and get dressed.

“Here, this is for you,” she tells me handing me an envelope. Opening it I see two copies of the ultrasound picture. I just thank her quietly wanting nothing more than to just finally leave the clinic. It is official now, I’m pregnant.

The realization hits me hard across my face as we walk out of the room and head to the car. Neither of us is talking, I’m scared, mad and desperate about the situation and I’m pretty deep in my thoughts when Shawn takes my hand and stops me before I could walk out of the building.

“Naya, let’s… talk for a minute, okay?”

I just nod my head as we sit down in two seats in the corner. No one is batting an eye at us fortunately.

“I, uh- I just wanted to tell you that… I know it’s scary and everything, and Andrew will probably explode when we tell him, but… I’m totally in.”

“In what?” I ask confused.

“In this. In us, in investing in this pregnancy. I want to be part of it, no matter how crazy things will get. And I guess I’m not saying anything new if I say I want us to… continue from where we were before things went downhill.”

“Things didn’t go downhill, our work came to its end and I did the logical thing.”

“But this is not work anymore. I want to give us a chance.”

I stare at him with mixed emotions. I don’t know what I want, I need time to figure out my next step. I have so much to worry about now that my feelings for Shawn must come second… or third… I’m more worried about what Andrew will say, how I’m going to work and what will people think if it ever gets out.

“I need time. It’s just too messy for me now. I’m sorry, but… I need to figure everything out.”

I can tell my answer doesn’t satisfy him, but he doesn’t protest. Pressing his lips together he nods shortly before we continue our way out of the clinic.

I’m shitting my pants when we reach the office complex where we are supposed to meet Andrew and Justin. I have no idea what to expect, but I’m sure it won’t be too pretty. Shawn tries to calm me telling me that it will be alright, but I know we are in trouble.

Shawn knocks on the door that has Andrew’s name on it and when we get the approval he opens the door.

“Ah, hey! I didn’t know you would be here too,” he immediately says when he sees me, confusion all over his face as he shakes hands with Shawn shooting him a questioning look. But he just ignores it and turns to the other guy in the room.

“Hey man, this is…” he starts gesturing at me, but he is not sure which name to use, so I step ahead and hold a hand out for Justin.

“I’m Naya. Hi.”

This is already over the work relationship I formed previously, my real name is justifiable. I see Andrew’s surprised face from the corner of my eyes and I know he is a smart guy, he must be putting the picture together slowly. But I bet he has no idea about the bomb we are about to drop onto him.

“Hey, Justin. Nice to meet you,” Stirling shakes my hand and soon we all take our places. Andrew is behind the desk, Justin is leaning against the bookshelf in the corner while Shawn and I are sitting in front of them.

“So, what is this meeting about?” Andrew questions. I turn to Shawn and he is already opening his mouth to answer.

“I have something to tell you, but I hope you won’t get mad. I just want you to listen to me.” Andrew nods and Shawn continues. “So… During the one month Naya and I kinda got cozy, if you know what I mean. In the last two weeks things escalated quickly, so it all took a romantic turn. But, um, w-we ended it when the month was over,” he adds and I’m staring at Andrew, trying to read his expressions, but I can’t. He is like a statue.

“Okay, go on, what is the problem?” he asks leaning back in his seat, but I have a feeling he already figured it out, because when he looks at me I can feel his eyes burning into my skin.

“We made a very reckless and immature mistake by… Um, we- we didn’t…” Shawn’s stuttering is getting under my skin, so I take a deep breath and just blurt it out.

“We didn’t use protection and I’m pregnant.”

The room falls silent, Andrew is staring at me, Shawn is staring at Andrew, Justin is staring at Shawn and I’m staring at the floor. The words felt heavy in my mouth and I’m afraid my heart is about to jump out of my chest.

After what feels like eternity, Andrew takes his glasses off pinching the bridge of his nose as he takes a few deep breaths. Once he places the glasses back he leans on the desk and finally speaks.

“Have you been to a doctor or you just did a test?” he asks in a calm, but distant tone.

“We went to the clinic together today. I was there, it’s one hundred percent,” Shawn answers for me.

“How many weeks are you?”

“It’s the fourth,” I mumble ashamed. Andrew’s questions are prim and strict, it all feels like an interrogation.

I look at Justin for the first time since Shawn started talking and his face looks blank, but I can tell his thoughts are racing, trying to figure out what to do with the situation.

“Okay, and what do you want?”

I furrow my eyebrows confused.

“What I want? I don’t understand it…”

“What do you want?” He repeats. “Money? Followers? A job? What do you want?”

“I don’t wa- You think I did this to get stuff from you or Shawn?” I ask realizing what this is about. Shawn’s first reaction was almost the same and now I’m definitely hurt. I never made them believe I’m a scheming bitch, why does everyone think I’m using them?

“Of course the thought crosses my mind, otherwise, how could you be so reckless to have unsafe sex?” he asks as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world, but it’s just making my blood boil.

“Andrew, it’s not-“ Shawn starts, but I cut him off.

“How dare you accuse me of being such a horrible person? You know nothing about me! Just because I work as an escort doesn’t mean I have such low life choices as getting myself knocked up by a client! You know what? It was a mistake to come here.” I grab my bag and throwing it on my shoulder I stand up, ready to leave. Everyone moves with me, Andrew and Shawn jump up and Justin takes a step towards me, all three of them to stop me, but the intentions are not the same. While Shawn wants me to stay because he cares about me, Andrew is just afraid is I slip out the door he can’t control the news anymore.

Shawn grabs my wrist and gently pulls me closer to him.

“Please don’t go, let’s talk.”

“You are not leaving without a confidentiality contract, no way you are walking out just like that,” Andrew growls and it’s just making it worse.

“You’re not making me do anything. I don’t need anything from you,” I spat at him and Shawn stands between us, as if he is afraid we would start a fist fight.

“Let’s calm down and talk, okay? Please!” he pleads, but behind him Andrew doesn’t seem too committed.

“I can’t deal with him if he is treating me like a bitch,” I say in a low voice, but the room is small, so everyone can hear it. Though I don’t care.

“Andrew, would you calm down? It was all an accident, she is not trying to ruin me,” he tells his manager turning to face him, but he is still holding my wrist.

I can tell Andrew is boiling inside, holding himself back not to throw the desk at me, and we are staring at each other like two hungry lions over the last piece of meat. Poor Shawn is standing in the middle, hoping he won’t have to pull us out of a fight anytime soon.

Then he takes a deep breath and nods.

“I’m sorry, but this was… quite shocking. I wasn’t expecting this.”

“I get it, it was a shocker for everyone, but let’s just talk about it, okay?” Shawn offers and I’m too tired and emotionally drained out to start a fight, so I nod my head agreeing.

We manage to sit back to our previous places and Justin stands right behind Andrew as we try to start it over again without the accusations and drama.

“I’m sorry for reacting so harshly,” Andrew starts, obviously thinking through his choice of words. “I’m just shocked, but of course, I don’t think you are trying to use Shawn. So… Let’s figure out what to do,” he offers and we all nod agreeing. “Was abortion ever an option?”

“No,” Shawn and I answer at the same time even though we never discussed it. Despite the difficulties of the situation I wouldn’t be able to abort this baby, it’s just impossible for me and I guess Shawn thinks the same way.

“Alright, then we need a strategy,” Andrew tells a bit more like to himself than to us as he is staring down at his desk. “Um… Are you guys…”

“Are you guys together now?” Justin asks speaking up for the first time in a while.

I see Shawn turning to me from the corner of my eyes, and his gaze is burning my temple as he is staring at me.

“It’s… it’s undefined. I have to figure a lot of stuff out.” I say feeling a bit guilty under their examining looks.

“But this is all joint now. Your decisions effect our work as well, I’m sorry, but you can’t just run free. Obviously, Shawn wants to take part in the baby’s life, so we have to work together. What stuff do you need to figure out?”

I feel awkward and anxious as I realize that he is right. I have to worry about myself, the baby and also consider Shawn as a third party, because he has the right to take part in this journey. I owe him honesty.

“I-I have to think about work, I need to talk to Joshua, because as soon as it gets visible I can’t work. But then I need money, because…” I don’t finish the sentence, I’m not ready to share my giant debts with them and listen to their pity. No way.

“Naya, I can support you financially. Let me help you out!” Shawn sighs obviously being over my shit, but I’m just too stubborn.

“No. That’s your money. I have my own problems to solve,” I protest.

“But I told you, we are in this together! I won’t just watch you struggle.”

“I can’t ask you to do me such a huge favor,” I shake my head staring down at my hands. I’m ashamed to admit how much debt I have to pay for every month.

“You’re not asking, I’m offering it.”

“Shawn stop!” I snap at him as I feel myself getting emotional again. “You have no idea how deep I’m in this shit! I inherited 1.2 million dollars of debts after my mom disappeared and left my number to everyone she was owing to, so now I’m paying thousands of dollars every month, because if I don’t, I might end up dead in a dumpster!”

My outburst is followed by total silence and my eyes are tearing up pretty quick. I didn’t mean to say it out loud, I never want people to know how much I struggle because of my own mother. She was a failure, never had a decent job so he paid for her debts by asking for more money from different people. Living this lifestyle for almost ten years can send you down the spiral, and when she disappeared after I moved out from her she left 1.2 million dollars worth of debt, forcing me to start working as an escort since this was the only job that offered me enough money each month to cover everything. I’ve paid back about half of the money by now, but I’m still coughing the rest every damn month. I was once late with paying, the next day two not too friendly guys showed up at my apartment and taught me a lesson with their fists. I never want to experience that. I scared the shit out of Elisa when she saw my black-eye.

“Can we… Can we have this conversation sometime later? I’m really not feeling good,” I say after a long time. I guess I shocked everyone with my outburst, they are all speechless. Shawn is the first one to recover after the scene.

“Um, Andrew how about we all have lunch tomorrow and talk about this? I think we all need some time to adjust the situation.”

I thank God for this offer, because I’m nauseous and anxious to sit here and talk about the future that involves a baby in my belly.

“It’s a great idea. Let’s just think about everything and come prepared the next time,” Justin nods agreeing and Andrew seems to be on the same page as well.

I put on my coat and keeping my gaze down I leave the office while Shawn exchanges a few words. I stop at the hallway waiting for him, chewing on my bottom lip I’m on the verge of crying once again. A few minutes later Shawn appears and seeing my long face he wraps an arm around my shoulders pulling me to his chest and this is exactly what I need right now.

“How about we get some takeaway, go to my place, eat and… just chill. Hm?” He offers mumbling into my hair, running his hands up and down my arms soothingly. I just nod my head, I’m too weak and stressed to talk and though I know I shouldn’t be getting closer to him, I just can’t resist. I need his presence, I want him to tell me it’s going to be okay, I just need somebody.

No.

I need him.

-

I AM SHOOK ARE YOU SHOOK LETS ALL BE SHOOK no im just kidding I WROTE IT hahaha okay im done here bye

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