#[ threads: is-itself-a-deviant ]

[tabithatwo]

there's a reason that so many people are intensely anxious about whether yellowjackets decides to keep classifying jackie and shauna a "vague teen-girl homoerotic-ish friendship" or to follow through and cement what that type of relationship actually is and actually means. and i've seen a lot of conversation about why it doesn't matter and if it doesn't matter to you, then i'm so happy for you (and jealous of you L O L) but if you're curious to understand WHY it matters fucking DEEPLY to so many people, gather around and buckle up while i attempt to explain it

first let me tell you why we're all acting like animals with lesbian-television induced zoochosis as we wait for 2.02: all signs point to this episode being the big one for jackie in particular (and for jackie and shauna as a relationship), so there's an assumption that the teased makeup scene is in this episode. that scene is what a lot hinges on.

(if you are on board with the narrative arc and already set on the make or break moment of that scene, you can skip ahead to NOW MY FINAL ACTUAL POINT a few paragraphs down)

there's been a distinct narrative arc ramping up to a big reveal (i already have very strange and mixed feelings about sexuality being used a reveal, but for a character like shauna, in a show intentionally meant to capture the tricks we play on ourselves in our minds, i would be absolutely on board with it) that said, the moment is now.

since the pilot, we've been on this journey of shauna's sexuality. sex is central to her character in a way that it isn't to any of the others. we meet her in 2021 masturbating on her daughter's bed, she goes on to have an affair with adam, we explore her boredom in her sex life with jeff, we see it improve post affair/murder. in 96 she has sex with jeff in the pilot, she grapples with the results of that sex for the rest of the season, she's quickly on board with the orgy/murder/shroom fest. (there's more to her and sexuality - rabbits representing her and jackie etc, but that's another post for another time.) suffice to say, sexuality is central to shauna.

in 2.01 shauna's sexuality is again central and even more explicitly sapphic/jackie central. "the thought of you with someone else always scared me. but it also turned me on. someone else's tongue in your mouth. their smell on you. I used to think that made me some kind of pervert." this show is smart. it's thoughtful. that's why we love it. giving us this line in 2.01, after showing shauna watch him with only one other person in the entire show (jackie in 1.01) is not an accident.

likewise, "say it" used in 2.01 by hallucination/ghost jackie, paralleling shauna's "say it" in 1.01 (asking jeff to say he loved her) is not accidental.

(gifs from 2.01 from @yellowjacketsgifs)

this show is very thoughtfully and intentionally weaving the jackie shauna romantic, sexual, obsessive love threads. i'm not going to go into exploring every moment between them that is sapphic (there are plenty of threads doing that, most people who follow me have seen it and understand it, i'm operating on the assumption that the people interested in this post understand that already).

2.01 gives us adult shauna referencing sexual arousal related to jackie. it then shows her being fucked by jeff in front of a painting of herself that is disfigured and decaying. and finally, we get the confirmation that shauna is cannibalizing jackie in 96 (leading to jackie's own disfiguration and decay). we've been led to understand shauna as a sexually driven and deviant character, and a lingering almost-reveal in 96 to jackie's corpse/hallucination/ghost hangs over us.

if this confession doesn't happen, if they walk back the gay, if they refuse to cement the realness of their romantic, sexual love in this moment, it's hard to understand why they'd build this perfect narrative arc just to ignore it and go on to cement it with something else later. anything is possible, but it really lends itself to a forever vague depiction. confession may be too narrow of a word, but what it encapsulates to me is something that you cannot ignore even if you want to - an i love you, a kiss, an i wanted you and i couldn't have you. (even the beginning of one of these, followed by an interruption that delays this heightened narrative arc would mean not losing hope.)

there have been constant interviews with the writers walking the gay back and forth, acknowledging and dismissing it in the same breath, and if that's happening to mask a reveal coming at the peak of this arc, then that makes sense. but if that's the language being used and no reveal is coming, it feels that this is the language we will always get for them.

NOW MY FINAL ACTUAL POINT- it fucking matters if they keep it vague. yes, that's how it goes in a lot of real life relationships like this. yes, it's common for young sapphics to have these relationships and never call them what they are. but that's the very fucking point i'm making.

these "friendships" do not happen to straight girls. i've seen some people say "i'm a lesbian, but even i had platonic friendships like this." and to that i say, i also didn't understand that straight girls don't do this shit for a long time. but they don't. there is no homoerotic tension in a friendship between two heterosexuals.

but women are told time and time again that there is. that everyone thinks girls are pretty. that all female friendship is just intense like that. that it's a part of growing up. and it's gaslighting. it's a thing we tell young girls to keep them in a box, to force them into comphet, to push their feelings down and away, to not rock the boat. it runs so deep we don't always realize we're doing it.

saying it's fine because there are cemented canon lesbians in the show is a cop out. and i understand the urge to say it - we're used to taking the scraps we can get from lesbian media and saying thank you. we don't bite the hand that feeds us, because not much food is coming. and i'm thrilled that i'm watching acknowledged lesbians on my screen, that i get to see their relationships. i love tai and van and tai and simone. but that doesn't fix this. saying be happy with what you got doesn't make sense here. this isn't a situation where jackie and shauna read as straight and viewers are trying to mash them together with no cause. if you think that, i really don't know what show you're watching. it's clear, it's intentional, it's direct.

and so many sapphic women have been constantly told, both in media and in their real lives, that what they had or have with women was less real because it was complicated. was less real because comphet or bisexuality or confusion existed along side it. was less real because they don't look or seem gay. because they never called it what it was. because they were young.

that, in media, it's enough to watch two girls engage in sapphic love without ever calling it that. without showing the audience what it was explicitly. masking it the same way society does and allowing for room to argue that it was platonic. that, in real life, it's enough to experiment. to think quietly about your attraction to women. to smother it, because every woman feels that way.

shauna is the pinnacle of comphet. everything about her screams it. and that's never an accident in creating a character. it includes nuanced and intense depictions. to pretend that it isn't possible for a show this smart to cement the reality of their relationship, while allowing shauna to retain the repression that comes with it as a characters is silly.

they can call it what it is in a million ways. and they are tight-roping the line so very carefully, leaving a small scrap of doubt. if they don't tip it over that line, it's intentionally holding shauna and jackie, both as individuals and together, in the purgatory hell that so many women who see themselves in these character have had to claw their way out of.

and the prospect of that from a show that you love, a show that knows how to depict lesbianism and sapphic love when it wants to, a show that is intentionally curating this entire dynamic in jackie and shauna, is painful.

[hemlocksandfoxgloves]

Teaser Friday

tagged by @thiamsxbitch 😽

Theo looks down at its softness, bewildered. He lets the blanket drift through his fingers, delicately, glancing at the werewolf with a guarded expression. “Why do you keep giving me things?”

Liam raises an indignant eyebrow, “I’m not completely evil you know.”

Hautely, Theo replies, “Yeah, I know. This is the most tamest kidnapping I’ve ever had.”

Liam’s eyes take on an edge as he bites back, “Coming from the person who hasn’t seen daylight in a week.” His voice drops into a low growl, “Or do I need to break your nose again? Something else?” He leans closer, his breath warming Theo’s skin. With extended claws glinting in the light, he traces Theo’s cheekbone. “Maybe I just need to slice up that pretty face of yours.”

Theo grins at him with a deviant smile, “You think I’m pretty?”

The thread of Liam’s patience snaps and with a guttural growl, he swings his arm, claws slashing ugly across Theo’s cheek with a fury. Theo lets out a painful yelp, his voice gruff. Blood poured from the gash, crimson staining his skin before the wound neatly knits itself back together.

Theo slowly looks back up at Liam with a snarl, eyes a blazing fire. “That all you got?”

Liam snarls back, his eyes glowing a deep amber. So much for keeping his anger under control. With a quick twist of Theo’s neck, a loud and sickening crunch echoes throughout the room.

Theo’s body slumps to the side, his skull twisted into an awkward angle as he tries to look at Liam. Red-faced and through clenched teeth, Theo grits out, “You broke my fucking neck!”

@ksbbb @wolfboy88 @fruchtfliege @mmoosen @chasing-chimeras @honestlydarkprincess

[scuderlia]

haircut!anon again: ok. wow. had to slam my phone down in my uni computer lab and wait until i could string together a coherent thought again. first off like au itself on back burner your MIND and the way you construct this narrative is INCREDIBLE and so raw adn true and pulling on the queer (as in deviant and as in gay) hair experince sooo deeply i feel soooooo deeply you are a magician. further. i was PICTURING max in braids and god fuck the tenderness of charles and max setting their mise en place and sitting together and braiding her hair before their prey comes in…. god. jesus. i can't stop re-reading the snippets. FUCK! sorry this isn't coherent thoughts after all. max and control and cutting charles' hair. fuck me uppp….

anon! i spent so long smiling like an idiot because of this ask, at this point you're basically my betrothed <3

but yeah, you get it. at the core of max and charles' relationship is truly their hounded devotion and acceptance of one another. the queer experience really is defined by those you hold close, and it's been interesting (for me) to try and thread that idea through this greater story about desire and hunger in a way that feels genuine. i've pulled on a lot of my personal experiences of being a young lesbian and being guarded about sexuality, but ultimately it all comes back to (like you mentioned) the idea of relinquishing some control and feeling comfortable enough with someone to let go of the safety of doing things alone.

i also love love love giving characters their own little rituals, and seeing as how max and charles both have a lot of emotional connections to their hair/haircuts/etc. the braids were an easy decision.

(more about max and her relationship to hair below the cut)

there's this really interesting article by Amelia Abraham titled 'What butch queer identity has to do with hair' that got put out by Dazed in 2022. it primarily covers a photography exhibition called Close Shave—which centers itself around butch haircuts and identity—but also goes into the cultural relevance of 'masc' hairstyles and their role in queer (mainly lesbian) expression.

i remembered and re-read it when i was in the early stages of fleshing-out max's character. i recommend the article to everyone, but especially people who are maybe looking to better understand the history of butch optics, and kind of where i'm coming from with some of max's characterization.

(see one of my favorite quotes from the article below)

While having short hair and identifying as butch don’t necessarily come as a pair, for butch people, haircuts can be transformational – getting your hair cut off brings you closer to your gender identity.

like I mentioned in the the answer to your previous ask, max's haircut kind of serves as a physical manifestation of her relationship with her father, and more specifically, how that relationship influences her feelings of shame (and eventually acceptance) towards her own sexuality.

part of the reason that max is so struck by charles saying she'd let her cut her hair is in large part because, for max, hair is incredibly representative of an individual's ability to control how others perceive and relate to them. by breaking the ritual with her mother, charles is essentially showing max that she not only finds comfort with her, but also trusts her enough to have her identity placed in her hands.

i could honestly talk about this forever... since body politics and queerness are things i'm just genuinely very passionate about... but i will save the innocent bystanders of this blog from having to read through all of that in one sitting.

(anyways, i'm so happy that people are as invested in this as i am... keep sending me long asks like this... if you couldn't already tell i'll take any opportunity to talk more about this au)

[ghoul-mortician]

The horror in Mage: The Ascension

From Guide to the Technocracy page 24

Let’s begin be re-examining the foundation of the whole game. We can sum up all the mystic mage philosophy presented so far in four words: Reality is a mess. Some people believe that reality is guided by consensus. If that’s true, then this reality, as we experience it, is defined by the combined will of billions of humans. Collectively, the human race creates a dominant paradigm for the world, one based on simple, reasonable ideas: gravity works, truth is proved through logic, two plus two always equals four and so on. A few isolated groups rebel against these notions, but the general consensus still creates what we see and experience. For the most part, our world is the one humanity has chosen. There’s one complication, though: Although humans form the most populous society in the world, they’re not the only one present. If reality is a tapestry woven by mankind, then someone or something is starting to snap the threads. Fringe groups, occult societies, monstrous creatures — all of these terrors hide within the warp, woof, and weave of the world, straining against the accepted fabric of reality. The insanity of the supernatural world is tearing reality apart. Some creatures are even more dangerous. They drastically alter reality itself to fulfill their own desires. By their will, so is it done. Call them whatever you like — willworkers, magi, mystics, shamans, Reality Deviants — in a word, they’re mages. They do not share the reality of the Masses. Instead, they place themselves above and beyond it, pursuing their own dangerous dreams. Through their power, any madness can be made manifest. ... Think, for a moment, of the horrifying reality of that statement. Through the mind of a mage, all things are possible. Any dream, any nightmare, any lust or desire can be realized. Any base urge can be fulfilled through sheer force of will. The darkness in a wizard’s soul calls out for meaning to define the mysteries of his existence. Offer him a mythos of primitive gods, and he’ll summon them into reality. Tell him lies of death and resurrection, and he’ll tear the veil between life and death asunder. Speak to him to him of spirits and the unseen, and he’ll release them into the world. Such is the madness of primitive magi.

[starkjoy]

i think i'm just feeling sad if that's okay to express here? like, the writers in the past have just, made me feel so seen and safe as a queer person. they haven't been afraid to explore, like, the ways in which 'deviant'/queer sexuality is subject to ridicule/punishment within family systems and broader cultural systems. i'm thinking about logan's repeat homophobia towards kendall (especially), roman, greg's dad, etc. and then the writer's just built up such like, profound homoerotism between tom and greg and countless other characters. and it just sort of seemed to me like they were gearing up for a really meaningful display of solidarity with queer folk? like with logan out of the way, the frontrunner of the patriarchal oppression olympics, the queer ships could have so much freedom/bandwidth to just, i don't know, live?? and instead it feels like, all of the writers gave into comp. het overnight, and now we're just getting a bunch of conwilla and tomshiv and shiv/mattson scenes as their queer-coded ships fade to the background and sink to the bottom of the sea 😣

thank you for sending this in and trusting me to share your thoughts!

while i don't want to start any major discourse since the season isn't over yet, i don't blame any fans for feeling disappointed or duped by the change of pace thus far. i don’t think succession ever set out to be some bastion of queer representation, and i highly doubt every seemingly queer-coded moment was intentional. that being said, in tomgreg and roman's case, the writers definitively used gay subtext and homoeroticism as both a plot thread and character development tactic. now it seems they’ve put those choices on the back burner, allowing the queer dynamics to rest in ambiguity while straight pairings are given more explicit attention.

it’s disappointing particularly in tomgreg’s case given how vital their queer-coded subplot was to the culmination of last season’s finale. i disagree with takes that are like, "if you ever thought tomgreg was going anywhere, you're stupid or haven't been paying attention." yeah, tomgreg going "canon" was never a likelihood—but i think that's moreso a testament to the realities of queer representation rather than the nature of their relationship in the show itself. that’s a whole can of worms i don’t want to open quite yet without having seen the full season.

despite what the writers may have intended, intention does not invalidate interpretation. in fact, in a business where art is made to be consumed and the art’s financial success hinges on that consumption, interpretation is just as important. don’t let anyone tell you your reading of the show is wrong, and don’t ever feel "stupid" for hoping for more, even if that’s unlikely. if the writers are going to drop crumbs, they shouldn’t be surprised fans want to follow them to a full meal.

[givemearmstopraywith]

Hi! I hope you're doing well! I was wondering if I could ask something about religion since you know much more about it and you have your own relationship with God but if you don't want to answer it or can't that's completely okay too, no pressure <3 so I've been battling with my own belief in god for a while now and i still don't really know how to answer the "do you believe in god" question and I've come to terms with that. But whenever I think that it would be nice to convert to one of the Abraham religions, I always stop myself because I can't reconcile religion with my lesbianism. It feels like I'm not allowed to believe in god or to be a part of a religion bc of my sexuality and I'm afraid that when people say that queerness is a sin in the eyes of god, they're right. The holy texts after all are against homosexuality or at least against the homosexual acts. I don't know how else to interpret them. It feels like I'm a doomed case and I don't really know what to do with this. I'm sorry if this is a lot, you don't have to answer of course if you don't want to. Thank you anyway, I hope you have a nice day <3

my queerness (i am a lesbian as well) felt like a huge impediment to my finding a place for myself in theology. then i realized that god calld me to theology because my voice was needed there: because change for the community doesn't happen without risk to the self. islam, judaism, and christianity are all historically kinder to queerness than they initially appear, or at least than it appears their current adherents would make them out. for instance in classical arabic and islam there existed mukhannathun, gender-variant people, without shame or guilt, accepted as innately queer and made this way by god; and there are eight genders in the talmud, six in rabbinical literature, and halacha recognizes intersex and non-conforming genders. the long thread of homosexual condemnation in the hebrew bible is, in all actuality, a condemnation of rape and incest. the events at sodom involve the people of sodom desiring non-consensual sexual contact with angels. the word angels in genesis 19 is malak, a messenger: this would be an act of defilement which, in hebrew esoteric tradition, is akin to that which caused the fall of angels from heaven. similarly in the new testament allusions to homosexuality are made in the context of worshipping other gods, participating in temple prostitution, or incest; it is not the act itself which is condemned because it is inherently homosexual or deviant, but rather the intention behind the act that is wrong.

contemporary praxis has lost this ease with bodies, although contemporary theology struggles to retrieve it. if god is calling you to faith, he will not ask you to abandon your body- nor your desires, your love, your pleasure, your instinct, your intuition. these too are holy. misuse and abuse is not. god made you in his image. no person can truly deny the goodness of god that is present in you. they may attempt it but such is only words and inherently loveless. the apostle paul writes that if i speak in the tongues of men or of angels [if i now all the scriptures and they are inscribed on my heart] but have not love, i am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol. if i have a faith that can move mountains but have not love, i am nothing. go where you see love reflected to you. god is there. if you see love in personal study and belief, god is there. i am not part of a formal religion for reasons other than my queerness, and i don't feel this inhibits my relationship with god; i know i will get there someday. but if organized religion is something to which you strongly feel god is calling you, trust him: in a very practical sense, there are lgbtq affirming churches, mosques, and synagogues that will identify themselves as such- i highly encourage you to see if anything like this exists in your area, or if there are any that offer online worship. reach out to religious leaders here and talk to them: they will always, always, be happy to speak to you. anyone who is without love does not know god.

[seldaryne]

10, 11, 12, 15, 16, 17 for durge~

10. What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the tadpole?

Pragmatic though Velrith may be, consuming more tadpoles & utilizing their abilities seems to be a more favourable route. In her mind, there's obviously some sort of reason that she hasn't undergone the transformation yet--some sort of protection that's keeping the effects at bay. The tadpole itself is a parasite, and it does need her at least semi-alive as its host. There's also an element of wanting to know more about her current situation, and part of that desire means that someone has to be a guinea pig. Particularly in Act 1, her feelings about herself are pretty nebulous. She's not overly concerned for her personal safety, and actually finds it reassuring that she's surrounded by people both willing & capable of putting her down if she starts to turn into a mindflayer, so she thinks of it as a calculated risk. Also, interactions with the Cult of the Absolute go considerably smoother when she's not operating from a place of total darkness.

Basically, once she weighed the options, there were more benefits to be found from tapping into the tadpole over ignoring it entirely. The Astral Tadpole is a different story. At that point, she's started to lose trust in the Emperor (though she's still fine with working towards his goals, at least until she feels like she has a better grasp of the entire situation. Like the tadpole, he clearly needs her alive for something. It's a truce, for now), and she's more interested in keeping ownership over herself. The Astral Tadpole seems a step too far away from that desire, and she refuses to budge on that.

11. What motivates your Dark Urge to either embrace or resist the Urge?

Answered here.

12. How does your Dark Urge feel about being a bhaalspawn?

In a word?

Despair.

It's a very unique feeling of helplessness, of knowing that she was always more or less doomed to fail. Her own desires didn't matter. She was never expected to develop her own path. She's not even sure what the point of allowing her developmental years to be comparatively 'normal,' unless it was to perhaps cultivate resentment & make her eventual indoctrination more spiteful. She doesn't remember feeling any of that, though; just emptiness. A void where her core should have been, distant from the very idea of what it meant to be truly alive.

Now, since she was a child, she'd always been interested in finding out the way things worked. What makes the clock tick? How do the wheels of a carriage know how to turn? Even if she's not as obvious about it later on, she still retains the curiosity. As Bhaal's chosen, it manifests in a less-than-acceptable fashion. More detached than she'd ever been, she started cutting into bodies to see if they had something tangible that she didn't. Externally, they were the same. Bhaal hadn't made something physically deviant, at least. So maybe there was something inside, tucked away behind the ribs and lungs, threaded in amongst the viscera & woven around the nerves.

Her abhorrent butler was delighted, naturally, and assumed the dissection-turned-vivisection was motivated by torturous desires. She never bothered to mention how part of her longed to crawl inside the open chest cavities, wrapping herself up in the wet warmth, hoping she could somehow absorb a patchwork version of her ideal self in that way.

She understands, in retrospect, why she was doing this. But she doesn't know whether to be more angry at herself for seeing the habit as something both justified and necessary, or being put in a position where she ever had the opportunity to discover it in the first place.

15. What is your Dark Urge’s greatest fear?

To slip again, to lose herself to the Urge, to die as an animal lost to its instincts rather than herself.

She knows she's technically rejected it, but the fear lingers. She can't rest until she makes those in close proximity to her swear that they're willing to prevent her from hurting anyone, and it's one of the few topics you can see cracks of real, honest anxiety in her face & hear it in her voice. It's not so much the fear of hurting the people she's come to care about (that's definitely a portion of it, though), it's losing everything she's worked so hard for in the process.

When she finished Orin off and was subsequently punished for rejecting Bhaal (her father--creator, really) she knew she was dying. She didn't want to die, and resisted as much as she was physically capable of doing, but she knew it was happening anyway. Her vision flickered, fading in time with the numbness spreading from her chest. Someone may have been yelling in the distance, muffled and far, far away. Or maybe that was the sound of her own screaming. It was hard to tell.

Yet, she was somehow happy to do it.

She was dying, but she was aware of it, and it was her, not some abomination of Bhaal. Those last moments of fleeting consciousness belonged wholly and entirely to her, to Velrith, and all of the decisions she made that led to that point. And Bhaal could take her life, but he couldn't take away that fierce shock of pride at it being hers.

Should she fall, it has to be on her own terms. She's not eager to embrace death, but she has that requirement of it when it comes.

16. What is your Dark Urge’s greatest desire?

It's selfish, and she's not convinced she deserves it. But she wants to live.

She's been given a second chance when she knows she likely deserves no less than execution for her past actions. She's found a small group of people who care for her despite all evidence prior dictating she should be shunned at the absolute minimum. From that, she's even found what she recognizes to be happiness in a romantic partnership (she still finds confusing fascination in how quickly Astarion was able to accept her, and doesn't know if she'll ever understand--but she's endlessly grateful). There are strangers whose faces she doesn't recognize who see her as a hero, as someone they can trust to help with their problems.

She is happy. More dangerously, she is content. And it feels so unfair, somehow, that she can sit there, basking in all this warmth when her body has been the instrument of so much destruction. Why should her hands be held gently, when they were made & used for tearing apart soft flesh & crushing bones? She should be, at the very least, generally hated & scorned if she's allowed to walk free after that.

But she isn't. It doesn't seem to happen (at least, not in anyone she's encountered yet).

She wants to keep living like this. She won't let herself put down the burden of her past. It seems an added cruelty that she can't make herself participate in. But even carrying that, it doesn't change the fact that's she wants to live.

17. What is your Dark Urge’s greatest regret?

Is it perhaps too dramatic to say it might just be her entire creation?

Velrith has never really been able to properly make peace with her past. It's not something you can ask either, since there's no way anyone would have a proper frame of reference. Well, you weren't as bad as Orin. You weren't as bad as Gortash. Do those statements even carry meaning? What good is being the lesser of two evils when the scale is that vast to begin with? (Besides, she can't even say with any degree of certainty that she wasn't worse. Evidence seems to point in the other direction.)

She's done good things. She's helped people. She knows this; she's even seen some of it firsthand.

And yet, the couple who selflessly took her in would still be alive.

And yet, the blood of so many innocents who just happened to get caught in the wrong place at the wrong time wouldn't have been spilled.

And yet, the city of Baldur's Gate likely wouldn't have been under this current threat if not for her past actions.

And yet, and yet, and yet.

So perhaps, on the whole, everyone would have been better off had she never been here in the first place.

durge asks.

[eagna-eilis]

Amendment though, from the perspective of a scholar of Irish literature...

'Take Me To Church' fits more in the pile of Horny Andrew songs than in the pile of Political Andrew songs.

It does not, lyrically, critique the historical power of the Catholic church in Ireland. It doesn't mention the institutions, the abuse of children, the incarceration of women, the human trafficking, the censorship, the ban on divorce until 1996 or restriction of access to abortion til 2018.

It utilises the *aesthetics* of Catholicism to lend gravitas, fatalism, and overtones of death and torture and sacrifice to a song about sex.

Lyrically, the song is about a very sexually gratifying but ultimately deeply toxic relationship. It's possible that the relationship described had a femdom element, which threads through 'It Will Come Back', 'Angel of Small Death', and arguably 'Too Sweet'. It's also possible that it was written about the same physically abusive relationship as 'Cherry Wine', and is therefore darker again.

Using the aesthetics of Catholicism to talk about sex is a big part of the culture of Irish high art (and indeed the lowbrow 1909 sexts sent by post from Dublin to Trieste by our most lauded literary horndog, the bould Jim himself). It's an easy sell, too, especially if there's kink implied. The power dynamic of the confessional, the images of martyred saints and of the Crucifixion, the supplication and guilt and ecstacy of absolution and sacrament. Hell, even the convergence of kink aesthetics with goth aesthetics, which themselves are very Catholic, and owe much to the work of Anne Rice, an Irish-American Catholic who couldn't have been more obsessed with sex, power, and death if she tried.

This was once very political. Oh, you're going to tell me who I can fuck, when, and, for what purpose? Watch me use your aesthetics as metaphors for very explicit business! Deviant business, even!

Nevertheless, this conflation of sex, death, and the High Church is no longer subversive in an Irish context. In our literary tradition we have done this for over a century. It's all over our novels and our poetry. This literary tendency doesn't work as a critique of the Church on its own, because it says very little about the conditions of repression and oppression which the institution created. It also was not written during the period when Ireland was a theocratic hellhole where women were locked up for premarital sex and children born out of wedlock were subject to for-profit theft. If anybody could go there, lyrically, it's my boy Andrew. But he didn't go there in his breakout hit.

TMTC is, in an Irish context, subversive only in its music video, intertextually giving itself a queer reading. The music video remains political because it created a connection between the repression of the Irish 20th century on all carnal matters and the present day repression of queerness in other parts of the world.

The actual lyrics of the actual song though? That's just what literary minded Irish boys do when they're expressing intense horniness. They dress it in incense and stained glass. They make it about worship and suffering and "a hymn rising in the dim cloisters of my heart", to quote one of Joyce's spicy letters.

It's a masterpiece, the finest distillation of this tendency of the 21st century so far. It might even be the zenith of it, the last ecstatic cry of a tendency we no longer need.

But it isn't inherently political. Not on its own. For politics, Hozier has plenty of other great songs.

🙃 Regular reminder that while Hozier has amazing love songs, he is ALSO very outspoken about his leftist politics, specifically anti-fascism, anti-racism, reproductive rights, Palestinian rights and more.

Take Me To Church and Foreigner’s God are scathing critiques of organized religion, specifically the Catholic Church and the colonization of Ireland.

Moment’s Silence is about oral sex but it’s ALSO about how that specific sexual act is often distorted to a show of power rather than that of love.

Nina Cried Power is an homage to various (mostly Black) civil rights activists from the US and Ireland and a call to follow their path.

Be criticizes anti-migrant policies and Trump and his ilk.

Jackboot Jump is about the global wave of fascism and about protest and resistance.

Swan Upon Leda is about reproductive rights and the violent colonial oppression of Ireland and Palestine.

Eat Your Young is about the ruinous way the 1%/capitalism and arms dealers prioritize short-term profit over everything else to the detriment of the youth/99%

Butchered Tongue is about Irish and other indigenous languages being suppressed and erased by imperial powers.

If any of the above surprised you, please, please delve deeper into Hozier’s music, you’re missing such an important part of his work.

[deviantartdramahub]

So I've been in both DeviantArtDramaHub and DeviantArtDramaNow for a while now and have had no choice but to take notice of the fact that the thread at https://discord.gg/sEuSSDz6TQ which I love and which is the closest thing to an official DeviantArt Discord server has been a source of tension for the latter Tumblr group which objects to its existence. So I got a little excited when I got the idea of posting the thread at https://www.deviantart.com/comments/18/2705034/5075873952 with the idea it would remedy the issue once I saw the answers. Needless to say the server at https://discord.gg/sEuSSDz6TQ is in the lead... by far.

I don't understand, what force is driving people to say there is something wrong with the server at https://discord.gg/sEuSSDz6TQ and then has those people try to just suck at managing an alternative? It literally has everything else that would make it perfect as the ultimate place I can see everyone, the only thing in the way is how needlessly afraid people are, like I cannot ask just any random people to join without hesitating (which sucks because it has done better than any of us could at making a server). Why this has to be inevitable I don't know. There isn't even a single other server on the list in the DA thread above that can call itself on par with a public hotspot, as my screenshot at https://archive.ph/exX6i shows I don't think they know how to do that. I think seeing this mindset is why I left their abode, they act like they're the only people around.

Forumers: *makes a server titled The Unofficial DeviantArt Server*

Also forumers: *only allows other forumers and not actual deviants*

We for one are happy to have you as mod once you begin your position.

[wearejericho]

is-itself-a-deviant asked:

“ i know how to fucking drive ! ” (Gavin and Connor (either human or android))

    ❝ i believe you. ❞ a small pause. ❝ —but for your information, detective, the speed limit through this area is 35 miles an hour, and you’re going 51. you also did not signal your previous two turns and i believe you ran through a stop sign leaving the station. please exercise caution in the future. ❞ the android keeps his eyes forward as he speaks, only looking over when he senses a pair of eyes on him. 

[bleedingviolet]

“I don’t know what the fuck to do to help but… I’m here.” [Gavin to Harper]

[ Extending Empathy Starters ]

Today seemed like it was out to get her, as if it had a personal vendetta to fulfill against the detective. She’d started the day waking up from a nightmare interrupting her sleep and had copious amounts of caffeine to compensate, which didn’t help the anxiety she now felt buzzing in her chest. 

She showed up for her shift early, hoping to distract herself. Fowler, fed up with Harper’s workaholic ass, had reassigned her heavy cases and left her with petty crimes and, particularly, traffic accidents to close. 

Fowler couldn’t have known, probably thought it would relieve some of her stress. Homicide, she could handle. But a constant reminder of her own trauma glaring at her from the terminal? She couldn’t do it. It broke her.

So Harper found herself hiding away, on the floor of the old archive room where evidence from cold cases and paper files were stored. No one ever came down here anymore; everything was digital now. So it had become her hiding place on bad days. 

She’d hugged her knees to her chest, face buried as the tears fell unchecked. Until a voice interrupted her pity party. Harper froze.

“…-what the hell are you doing down here?” She cursed, but the words held no bite to them. “Tell anyone about this, especially Fowler and I’ll…-ugh, I don’t know. Just don’t.” Harper didn’t have it in her toss out a proper threat.

[neonacity]

ARCANE : INIZIO | CH.6 | NCT DREAM X READER

Summary: When human deviants granted with the abilities of the legendary Arcana cards find themselves racing against devious forces, they are left to make a choice that might change the fate of the world itself: be the victims of the game, or become the masters of it themselves.

But will this war end with a crowned hero?

Or will it just create another mad villain?

*****

Note: This is the second book of Arcane. The happenings in this story is a prequel to the first installment which you can check in my Masterlist. Since the lore is highly dependent on the first book, I highly suggest you check it out first—otherwise, new readers might have a hard time understanding what is happening here. Expect lots of time jumps and flashbacks throughout the chapters.

Pairings: Dream 00’ Line + Mark x Reader

Trigger Warnings/Themes: romance, violence, torture, trauma, poly dynamics, suggestive themes, language, psychological, mystery, sci-fi. The concept of the tarot or Arcana cards will be loosely used throughout the series. Note that I am not a trained doctor so there may be some slips here and there about medical things. Again, this is a work of fiction and I am not implying any likeness between the characterization here of the boys to their real life counterparts. I also reserve the rights to all my work—I do not post anywhere else other than tumblr. Minors DNI. Please do not repost. I only publish my works in Tumblr.

© neonacity, 2022

Previously > CH. 1 | CH.2 | CH.3 | CH.4 | CH.5

In the beginning, there was everything and nothing.

Quod est superius est sicut quod inferius, et quod inferius est sicut quod est superius.

That which is above is like to that which is below, and that which is below is like to that which is above.

Harmony and equilibrium is the great thread that runs through the universe, and the very same law that keeps the aether, the nether, and the mundane world coexist peacefully with each other. For billions of years since the dawn of existence, humanity prospered in between the world above and the underworld, supported by opposing life forces necessary to keep the universe from tipping over. For centuries, there was peace, until a great shift started unraveling the fabric of the three worlds.

Greed. Pride. Lust. Gluttony. Envy. Sloth. Wrath.

As human consciousness grew, so did their desire for more festered. Kingdoms were created at the expense of tearing apart lands, wars were waged for vainglory, and lives were traded in exchange for earthly pleasures. As darkness threatened to tip the great balance of the three worlds, heavenly and nether forces were forced to work together to keep the universe from losing its equilibrium. Where the three dimensions once co-existed separately before, the greater powers threaded in the greater cosmos lent parts of their forces to the mundane world to try and keep its balance.

And thus, the twenty-two Arcana powers were born.

Each heavenly and infernal force chose its human stewards, vessels who can wield the energies of aether and nether in the mortal realm. The powers were neither good nor bad, but the first Grandmasters—and their succeeding bloodline—were given a task that they will have to carry along for as long as humanity exists: keep the equilibrium in the mundane world and protect it with their lives.

The powers are divided into three classes, the same way the universe is with its three dimensions.

The First Class: The Knights. Arcana masters whose abilities can bend matter and elements to affect the physical realm.

The Second Class: The Oracles. Arcana masters who have control over the subconscious, the psychic, and the ethereal.

The Third Class: The Triad. The holders of the last three pillars of the Arcana. Alone and separated from the bloodline, they are powerless, but together with the great system, they are the only ones who can tap into the abilities of the other masters.

For decades, the bloodline grew and prospered as new masters were born every generation. While the Family's existence is kept a secret from the greater mundane world, its members prospered and made their marks known in society as its secret vanguards. Kings, Queens, Inventors, and Great Artists, the force of the secret brotherhood was threaded and felt throughout the course of humanity. Wars were won and some battles were lost, but one thing remained the same. Regardless of the battle, the Grandmasters are here to protect the balance of the universe.

And so it begins, once again.

******* "Make one wrong move and you lose your head."

You turned around, not in fear of the words that managed to break through the mundane talk over at your breakfast table, but because of the familiar voice that said it. Beside you, Renjun, Haechan, Jisung, Chenle, and Jaemin also did the same, their expressions changing as their eyes landed on the group now smiling at your lot. You gasped the same time the boys made their own expressions of surprise, some even jumping from their seats.

"Johnny-hyung!"

"Woah, Jaehyun-hyung and Yuta-hyung—"

"Taeil-oppa?” 

"Hey, kids. What's up?"

The tallest of the group, a man with black hair that fell over to his eyes, gave your table a wink before reaching over to ruffle Haechan's hair. Everyone was still pretty much stunned by what was happening that Ten's amused laughter had to pierce through the ruckus to bring you all back to focus.

"I told them they can all see you later after classes but these losers had to force their way in here to make a scene. I guess the cat's out of the bag then. We have visitors."

"You're talking as if we didn't just graduate here a couple of years ago," a guy standing by his side with a playful smile nodded over to him, his eyes sparkling. "Is that what being a teacher does? You used to run around with us and do—"

"Shut the fuck up, Yuta. And I'm not a teacher here, I'm the Academy's doctor. Kun is the one who ended up with the boring job."

"I'd love to call it boring, but I think it's actually pretty cool. You saw their breakfast buffet? Do teachers also get that now?" A shorter guy with close-cropped hair motioned towards the half-finished plates on your table. Taeil gave you all a small smile seeing the still stunned look on your faces.

"You all look like you're seeing ghosts," Johnny teased as he plopped on the vacant seat next to you. With a big grin, he draped an arm over you and pulled you into a half hug that almost cut off your air supply. 

"Hi, Princess. You've grown up, haven't you? You still single?"

You couldn't see anything while being smothered by the bear of a man, but you heard Haechan clearly from somewhere across the table.

"Yah, hyung!"

"Uh-huh, I think she is still single."

“Yep. Definitely still single.”

Another voice chimed in, sounding extremely amused. You were on the verge of protesting when Johnny finally let you go with a laugh. You pulled away, a little disgruntled, and came face to face with a chuckling Jaehyun across from you.

"What are you all doing here?" You finally managed to ask, your tone a little disgruntled as you tried to straighten your hair that Johnny managed to mess up. A few of the other students still lingering for breakfast threw you looks from the other tables, gawking at the newcomers. Not that you can blame them. For the general student body, this group had a reputation as the ringleaders of the Academy in their heyday. 

For you and the rest though... It’s a little bit more complicated.

After all, there is just no way it is plain coincidence to have the strongest Arcana Masters back in Rosewood.

In terms of control and maturity of abilities—and unlike the current masters enrolled as students—the earlier batch of Arcana masters are at the apex of the current generation of ability holders. Their powers have matured enough to be at their full potential after years of training and practice. If this were a battle, they would be considered the war generals—and seeing who is at Rosewood at this very moment can in no way be lacking of any significant meaning.

Johnny, Master of the Justice. Arcana Number: 08. One of the most physically strong in the family, his position is at the forefront of battle, not because of his sheer prowess in fighting alone, but due to the nature of his power. Ability: Karmic Manipulation. Whatever's done to him, he can cast tenfold of it back to its wielder by mere compulsion alone.

Jaehyun, Master of the Tower. Arcana Number: 16. He stands next to Johnny in the line of fire, being the human embodiment of carnage itself. Ability: Destruction Magic. Jaehyun has the power to shift energies to destroy everything on his path, including their life force so that they are totally erased from the cycle of the universe, never to be reincarnated again.

Yuta, Master of the Hanged Man. Arcana Number: 12. Another ace of the family, Yuta is one of the few members whose power can be projected to the outside world and to himself. Ability: Gravitational Manipulation. He can control the physical laws of gravity to his advantage, allowing him to also be the only member to have the ability of flight.

Taeil, Master of the Hermit. Arcana Number: 9. Though not a physical caster, his powers are probably one of the most terrifying among the Oracle class. Ability: Nightmare Inducement. He can get in anyone's head to know their greatest fears and project them to the physical world.

Ten, Master of the Chariot. Arcana Number: 7. He rarely uses his powers because they can affect the fabric of destiny alone. Ability: Space-Time Manipulation. The lord of time himself, he can jump through different dimensions and locations at will.

"Can't an alumni visit their home school?" Johnny asked back, his tone light. You exchanged a quick glance with Jaemin and Renjun beside you. 

"Aren't you supposed to get married next month, hyung?" Chenle asked politely but pointedly. It was brief, but Johnny's friendly smile slipped ever so slightly before he caught himself again. For once, he actually seemed like he didn't have any answer to shoot back.

"Masters just can't go back any time they want to… We are all meant to go somewhere to watch over things after leaving Rosewood. Aren't you working for the Korean Central Intelligence Agency, Jaehyun-hyung?" Renjun said next.

"I'm pretty sure you don't get a lot of vacations there to spend for a quick school visit," Jaemin trailed off to drive the point across.

If the group wasn't obvious earlier at least for the clueless, they certainly are now with the way they exchanged looks. Ten looks like he was on the verge of breaking when another trio caught all of your attention as they strolled towards you. Your eyes rounded in surprise when you recognized their faces.

"Taeyong-hyung," Jisung voiced out the man's name who was currently flanked by Kun and another girl whose face you know so well. What on earth has your father done this time? 

"I thought we agreed to talk to all of them together?" Kun frowned at Ten who gave him an exasperated shrug.

"They never listened to rules as students, do you really think that has improved now?"

"Sorry for barging in. Are these guys bothering you?" Taeyong asked, his eyes kind as usual as he regarded all of you. It's been a couple of years since you've last seen him since he graduated, but you realized that the former Head Boy and well-known Legacy in the family has retained his kindness until now. Taeyong, like Kun, is a member of the bloodline but lacked any powers, but that hasn't stopped him from playing a pivotal role in the clan. While Kun stayed at Rosewood to defend it should something happen, Taeyong was sent to fight for it and protect it from a distance. The duty given to them is what earned the pair the title of this generation's Ace of Shield and Ace of Sword.

"Taeyong-oppa… You're also here," you trailed off before your gaze unwittingly slipped towards the girl standing by his side. She looked like she didn't want to impose her presence, but you couldn't stop yourself, not when you know her face all too well.

"And you… Mijeong?"

Her head jerked and she looked at you wide-eyed as you called out her name. Despite the strangeness of the situation, your lips slightly twitched into a knowing smile.

"You remember my name?"

"We were classmates at Advanced Psychology. And you've also been watching over me since I joined the University. I hope my father didn't force you to do it."

If she looked surprised earlier, then Mijeong definitely seemed shell-shocked now. Beside her, Taeyong raised his brow curiously before glancing at Kun who looked like he was trying his best not to smile.

"You, you've always known that I—"

"Was tasked to guard me? Yes. I wouldn't think too much about it though. You're really good, but I've also spent my whole life living with my father's schemes."

"I guess she wouldn't need too much introduction then if that is the case. Kim Mijeong, she's the master of The Strength and—" Taeyong started before he was cut off by a flash of silver darting from out of nowhere past him. The movement was too quick for all of you to notice, but the next thing you saw was the butter knife safely tucked between Mijeong's middle and forefinger. The girl raised her eyebrow before twirling the blade casually in her hand.

"Yuta… Can you please not do that?" Taeyong asked with a sigh. The boy in question smirked, his eyes set on the other Master.

"When they said La Fuerza is from the Kim clan, I didn't expect it to be the little sister. I had to check if she’s good since that family thinks they're too good for Rosewood," Yuta said, his eyes dancing. Mijeong returned the snark by staring him down.

"We have a different training as the working guards of the family. I don't think it's such a bad idea to skip the Academy too if it means we get spared from mingling with douchebags like you," she snapped back smoothly before making a show of making one last twirl of the  blade in her palm before closing her fist around it. The lot of you watched, jaw slacked, as she easily folded and bent the metal in her hand like it was a piece of paper. The next second, she was flinging it back to Yuta's direction with a flick of her wrist. The now crumpled clump of metal stopped just a few inches from hitting the other in the face as he stopped it with gravity.

Chenle gave a low whistle, impressed by the show. Kun, however, looks like he was done with the exchange.

"Okay, can we just stop throwing blades at each other for a moment? It's 9AM."

"Yes, which makes it the perfect time for you guys to answer our question. I'm afraid even this isn't enough to distract us," you added before giving the newcomers a pointed look. Taeyong gave you a slightly guilty smile before touching the back of his head.

"Your father invited us for a little bit of help. We don't think we will be here for a long time though, don't worry. I think he just has a few things he wants to try."

The way you and Haechan looked at each other at the same time told you one thing. He’s not lying, but he’s definitely not telling the whole truth either. If there's one thing you all know about Taeyong, it's his talent to make the worst of things sound like a frolic in the garden.

"When you say a few things he wants to try…" Haechan asked, prodding for more.

"A few… classes specifically. And drills," Kun was the one who answered this time. Silence dropped on your table, thick and loaded with meaning. The next one who broke it was the most unexpected of all.

"Is something happening? If there is, I think we have a right to know about it," Jisung said, his voice still polite but steady. Several pairs of eyes swiveled towards him, surprised by the youngest’s comment. You could almost physically touch the lingering guilt from his older brothers before Taeyong finally sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

"We want to tell you, but the Headmaster hasn't given us a lot of information either. He called us back to protect Rosewood against attacks—from who, I doubt he knows himself—and to prepare everyone. Especially you kids."

"What does that mean?" Chenle asked, confused. "All of us got calls from our families yesterday. They said we might leave the Academy temporarily."

"Not until you finish your training," Jaehyun said as he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Training? With who?" Jaemin replied.

"With us." Johnny answered as he finally picked himself up from his seat. You and the others froze, not expecting his answer. Nobody needed to say anything for all of you to piece together what’s happening.

The seniors are not only here to protect the Academy, but to prepare all of you for a bigger war.

"We're officially making an announcement later but since you're all here…" Kun started, looking at each of you. "The rest of the student body will be sent back to their homes today. Regular classes are indefinitely postponed to make way for drills which will start tomorrow."

"All Knights class will be divided into groups and will be trained under Johnny, Jaehyun, Yuta, and Mijeong. The Oracles will be assigned to Taeil and Ten. Taeyong and I will be moderating everything."

"And the Triads?" You asked, causing Kun to stop. He looked unsure of what to tell you, but you didn't waver, keeping your eyes steady on him for an answer. 

"I think you need to talk to your father first..."

Your hands balled into fists under the table. You haven't talked to the man again again since your confrontation at his office, but the fact that he didn't include you in any of his plans does not mean anything good. You kept silent now, however, knowing that you should be more careful of your actions.

"You can all go back to the dormitories now. We'll just call you again once everything is ready. I suggest you just… relax today," Taeyong said before looking at the other newcomers to signal them to leave. You all watched quietly as the group picked themselves up and bid you their goodbyes.

Renjun was the first one to talk once everyone was out of the door.

"What's going to happen now…?" He asked quietly. Haechan dropped again to his seat, looking as worried as the rest of you.

"Training under those beasts? We're going to die. That's what's going to happen. We're going to fucking die."

******* "Get up. We need to go."

Jaemin opened his eyes and gave you an unbothered glance the moment you locked the door behind you. He looked unsurprised by your sudden barging in, a look of mild curiosity tracing his features as you started pacing in his room. He remained unmoving from his spot on the bed even as you finally turned to him, gnawing at nail on your thumb.

"What exactly are we up to today?" He asked mildly, raising his brows at you in question. You paused, not knowing how to best phrase the answer.

"We're ransacking my father's office."

The silence that followed was almost painful. You winced, expecting the worst reaction.

"You've absolutely gone mad, noona."

Your shoulders slumped at his reply. He is right. You've reached the point of being batshit crazy this time, but you're also desperate, and time is not necessarily on your side.

"Look, I need to do something. There is no way Papa will tell us anything so we need to find our own answers. This is the only time that we have. I checked. He left the Academy again so his office is free," you paused before finally staring at him. "Will you help me?"

It took him a bit to answer. The truth is, when it comes to things like this, he is the only other person you could trust to have your back. Mark is too straight-laced to try and do something like this—that and the fact that he still refuses to talk to you—and Jeno... Jeno would be another good option too if only he hasn’t been avoiding you as well. The rest, you didn’t want to drag into trouble in case you get busted. You didn't realize that you've been holding your breath until Jaemin finally sighed and started picking himself up from his bed.

"They say I'm the devil, but you're actually more dangerous. Don’t play innocent, you already know my answer when it comes to you," he said as he straightened his clothes. You tried your best to hold back your grin from showing.

"You can say no, you know," you quipped as you both headed to the door. He easily opened it and motioned for you to lead the way.

"When I can ask for a payment for this favor? I don't think so. Lead the way, love. We have some sleuthing to do."

******* "So, what exactly are we looking for?" Jaemin asked as he went through the stacks of books in your father's shelves. The room was dim with only one small fluorescent lamp that you decided to open and you squinted in the dark as you flipped through the folders on his desk.

"I don't know… Anything that can give us a clue. He told me that the Kims alerted him about people trying to pass through the barriers of Rosewood a couple of months ago. I don't believe he hasn’t been working on getting any leads since he found out about it."

At your words, Jaemin froze on his spot and slowly turned to look at you. You returned his gaze knowingly as you closed another folder and placed it back to its pile.

"People? You mean—"

"Humans… Mundanes who aren't part of the bloodline," you muttered grimly. This is the first time you've shared the information to any of them since your talk with your father. You figured this is the best time to give him an idea, given everything that has happened in just a span of a few days. 

"But how—" he paused, his face strained. "Is this what this is all about then? Whatever it is that we are preparing for, it's against the humans?"

"Not just any group of humans, I guess. Someone powerful, or else they wouldn't have much influence to pull something as big as this. That's what we need to find out. Whoever wants to steal the Arcana powers."

"So this isn't really a fight but a hunt. That's why our parents are asking us to leave and why Jaehyun-hyung and the others are going to be training us. We're running away and being taught to defend ourselves."

You didn't immediately answer, though the look on your face was enough of a confirmation for him. The truth is, you still do not want to follow the path your father is drawing up for everyone. Escaping is the most logical course of action, but it can also start a cycle that none of you might be able to break. If you run now, you'll be looking at your backs and living in fear forever.

"Is that why he is also marrying you off to Mark-hyung?"

His question was not surprising, but it still definitely made you pause. Ever since your father told you about the arrangement, you haven't really talked to anyone about it, Mark included. After your talk, you are convinced he was trying to stay away from you as much as he can—and for that, you couldn't really blame him.

"It was a discussion between him and Mark's father. None of us said yes to it," you said, shifting your eyes away from him and continuing to sift through the other files on your father's desk. Jaemin was quiet, but you could feel his stare heavily on your skin.

"I think you know what his answer will be given the choice. The question is, do you want to marry him?"

This time, you felt your heart clench.

"I don't want to marry anyone for convenience."

Jaemin's loaded pause was so palpable you almost wanted to escape him.

"You love him. You can fool anyone, but not me. You've always loved him."

"If you're so good about reading me, then you should also know the reason why I can't be with him," you said as you finally met his gaze steadily. The light from the lamp threw shadows over the curves of his face from where he stood, but it was the look in his eyes that spoke the words none of you wanted to speak out.

You didn't know when it happened, but as you grew up, both Jaemin and you somehow came upon a silent agreement never to talk about things like this. It wasn't needed, because you both know where you stand in each other's lives. It was a silent dance, one that both of you were content in doing for as long as it could work. He never rocked that boat, but as you looked at him now, you were also gripped by the sudden fear of that world slowly being tipped over.

"It is the right choice…" he said slowly, almost as if he was forcing the words out of his lips. "If the humans are after us, that means there is a traitor in the family. The Masters will be vulnerable, especially you and your father. Mark-hyung's family… You can either be a part of them, or have them as your number one enemy."

"Do you want me to marry him, Jaemin?"

This time it was him who stopped. His expression didn't falter, though you noticed the way his jaw slightly ticked as if he was trying to control himself. 

"If my family can give you the same protection that his can, then believe me, I would have whisked you away by now and married you on the spot."

You took a slow breath in at his answer.

"You can’t say that. You know that I—  "

"Love me just as much as you do him, Jeno, Renjun, and Haechan? I've personally never had any problem with that. I think you know that by now. I want you. I don't care whatever else comes with that."

To say that you weren't ready for this conversation was understating it. Jaemin had always been safe, that one person you knew would always have your back without really losing sight of what should and shouldn't be done. Right now though, he is making you look at things that you aren’t ready for yet.

You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn't notice him crossing the distance to where you were seated. The next thing you felt was warmth touching your cold cheeks as he ever so gently tipped your face to look at him. The way he held you and the look in his eyes almost made you want to fold into yourself.

"Tell me what's on your mind… You're hurting…" he whispered as he started gently running his hand over the corner of your eye.

"I wish you didn't know me so much."

He smiled.

"IL Matto or not, you can't run away from me when it comes to that, love."

It took you a moment to answer again. After a few more heartbeats, you finally stood up and walked towards the center of the room, as if putting distance between the two of you would somehow lessen the impact of your words.

"I don't think I will be living long enough to marry anyone, Jaemin," you started, voice low enough only for him to hear. His eyes slowly widened and you avoided his gaze to not see the realization there.

"It hasn't been part of my plan. Ever. I don’t want to stay here for a long time. How can you live in fear knowing that you can turn mad one day and just lose everything? It's terrifying."

"You're not going to—"

"I will. In time," you cut him off before he could even finish. "Papa knows it and I know you do, too. I can feel it. It will happen one way or another. It’s the curse of IL Matto."

He was quiet. For the first time, he actually let his emotions run free as he stared at you. You could see the gears working in his head and you gave him a small smile as you watched him piece things together.

"You want to fight," he said lowly. “You’re going to go against your father’s plans.”

"Yes. Somebody had to stand up to him. I don’t want to run. I want to try to fix things while I still can.” 

He was about to say something again when a sudden beeping rang through the room. You both turned to the phone on your father's desk, it's red light beeping from the incoming call. You were still both frozen on your spots when the ringing finally stopped and the system switched to voice mail.

"Sir, we're done trying to process the specimen that we got from the night you were attacked. The men were using unknown technology that was unlabeled but we traced some of the scraps we got from the site and made a successful match. We have a name now."

Both you and Jaemin stared at each other, faces pale. Your heart was beating so loud against your chest that you thought you wouldn't hear the unknown man's next words.

"It's Cypher Institute."

******* "I'm surprised that you're actually the one who showed up today. I thought you were making sure to keep things under the radar."

The lilting, almost amused voice of the woman felt like thin ice needles slowly sinking into his skin. The private room's lighting was dim, but even the lack of proper illumination didn't tarnish the deep red lips that now tilted into a mirthless smile across from him. Everything about her looked cold, almost to the point of artificial perfection, and that's coming from a man who is also known for icyness himself.

"A show of faith to this unlikely partnership, if I must say. I didn't want you to think I might stab you on the back," he answered back just as smoothly, his expression never-changing. The woman's smile widened, showing perfect white teeth.

"Now, now. I think you don’t have too much faith on us. Why would I think that, after all that you've done for us…?"

"Junho Lee."

The mention of his name almost made him flinch. As one of the most prominent members of the Arcana bloodline, he does have an ability of sensing energies of others. This woman might be powerless—a regular human—but what she has is something more sinister than any of the ancient powers above and below.

Unadulterated greed.

And madness.

"I want to personally have your word about our arrangement," he said stiffly, his cold gaze unwavering on her. She merely turned her head a little to the side in mild interest.

"Mm… Is this the one about your son? Feel free to be specific. The consequences of your betrayal run deep after all."

Her use of words finally shook his facade. His fists closed in response, an action she did not miss from the way her eyes lit up with amusement. When Junho Lee signed up to this agreement, he knew he was permanently damaging his sacred ties to the Family. Playing with fire was part of the game, but he did not expect to be against the Devil herself.

"I need your word that my son will be unharmed once all of this is over and done. I don't care whatever else you do, but Mark stays safe."

"Of course. Is that all?"

He paused. The woman’s expression didn’t change but something about the way she looked at him told him that she was probing for... more. Junho knew this time will come when he will be asked to make a choice, but that didn’t make the process any easier now that he is finally at the crossroads. 

When he decided to sell his soul to Cypher, he only had one goal. To make the man who was behind the death of his wife suffer. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. IL Giudizio allowed his own wife to go mad and wreak havoc on others, resulting on the death of a whole generation of Masters. He was the reason why his family was ruined and why Mark's mother was ripped away from him. The man deserves to suffer, his family included, and yet… he couldn't bring himself to betray his daughter to the Institute. While he has no trace of care for the current IL Matto, he knew—from the way his son looks at her—that she is one he is willing to burn the world for; the same way he is doing now for his own lost love. 

Mark already lost his mother. He can't bear to rip the last woman he loves from him too. For that, he is willing to spare some souls. 

"Yes. Just him. You can do whatever it is that you want with the other Masters."

"Ah… how cruel. To think that your family used to be the number one trusted clan of the whole bloodline itself. Who would have thought that you would be the one to send them to the slaughterhouse yourself."

"I am loyal to no one and nothing but power."

The woman paused, her smile frozen in her lips. Her vision was one of the most terrifyingly beautiful things he's ever seen, her eyes piercing… still probing.

"One last question then," she said slowly, deliberately. His facade never changed despite the cold starting to gnaw at him from the insides.

"Who is IL Matto?"

"I do not know. IL Giudizio considers me as his closest confidante and trusted ally, but not enough for him to betray the last member of the Triad even to me. If you want to look for the last Master, you'll have to torture it out of his own lips."

He delivered his answer so smoothly and so effortlessly that he could have fooled anyone with his lie. But this woman is evil incarnate herself, and for that he had to work harder. It felt like having a stare off with a beast waiting for its prey to blink and show any weakness. He didn't waver though until finally, she smiled at him once more.

"I see. If that's the case, then you have our promise. Your son will be spared. But only if you deliver your end of the bargain. Time is running out and I am growing bored."

"Bring IL Giudizio to Cypher."

Junho took that as a cue for him to finally stand up and leave. Straightening his coat, he gave her a look that could rival her ice.

"One of my men will give you a call once everything is ready. Tell IL Mondo... I send my regards."

Miyoung’s smile sharpened at the edges as she followed the man's retreating back until it disappeared out of the room. Her soft voice lingered in the air, an echo of the closing of the door.

"Let the games begin."

CHAPTER 7

*******

A/N: So... It’s  been two months. Are there people who even still remember this story? Lol. Anyway, I’m just dropping this here real quick before I semi-disappear again. This feels rushed and and is shorter than usual, but I’m glad I was still able to finish a chapter. Enjoy!

@effulgentfireflies, @kasperneo, @lostlovesoul11, @byunniebaekhyunnie, @smolpeyy, , @dearj43, @bettyschwallocksyee, @babyksworld,   @yongboksfreckles,  @user103843, @lovehowdream, @glitching-wren, @jhornytrash, @coconuttiez8d, @negincho​, @stopeatread​, @ellatizw​, @huangberryyy, @wonyofanclub​, 

Untaggable for some reason: @renjunsflower, @coconuttiez8d

[sineala]

Love your fics! Wanted to know your opinion about AXE now that it's finished :>

Oh boy oh boy! Thank you for asking! I loved AXE so much. It was definitely the best story I've ever read about what would happen if your house acquired sentience and hated you and decided to destroy the world.

Seriously, though -- I really loved AXE Judgment Day. I have a half-finished post where I was attempting to summarize the complete event with all the tie-ins and I should probably… finish reading all the tie-ins and finish writing that. I have an AXE Steve/Tony WIP -- the kind of fic that is basically meta disguised as a story where they talk through how they feel about the whole thing -- that is 42,000 words and I am nowhere near done yet. I honestly think it's one of the best line-wide Marvel events in a long time, which is really impressive when you consider that for the most part it's an event about the X-Men and the Eternals and I have almost no fannish interest in the Eternals and I haven't been consistently reading any X books since X Of Swords started.

So why do I like this event so much if it's not even about characters I am currently following? Well, I'm here for Steve/Tony, and I think it's a really good event for Steve and Tony, both as individual characters and for their relationship with each other, and I think the end of the story leaves them each in a really interesting place emotionally, with enough hanging threads that make it interesting to me fannishly.

We've had a few events in the past several years where Steve and Tony were basically on opposite sides -- Infinity (when you consider the fact that Tony has already been secretly betraying Steve), Axis, Time Runs Out/Secret Wars, Civil War II (when you consider the fact that it wasn't actually Steve), Secret Empire. Sometimes these events have prominently featured Steve and/or Tony, but as a Steve/Tony fan most of these weren't satisfying to me on an OTP level because they're not really on good terms. Although, yes, Secret Empire did provide a hell of a lot to think about and also some really interesting material for AUs because it did give us an evil Steve who, uh, canonically loves Tony. You should see my WIP list. But Secret Empire wouldn't make my list of events where Steve and Tony are BFFs, if you get what I mean.

We've had events where they were on the same side but the event wasn't really about them -- War of the Realms, Empyre, King in Black, Devil's Reign. (As far as I can tell, Devil's Reign never actually had the real Tony in it, either, but I will admit to not reading all the tie-ins.) Heroes Reborn was also a thing but didn't ever have Tony even meet Steve, AFAIK. So, I mean, it's nice that they don't hate each other but also they are just a couple characters in a cast of thousands. I think Empyre comes the closest, and I really enjoyed Empyre, but I wouldn't call Steve & Tony the stars of the event.

So AXE is one of the first events in a long time -- maybe since AvX? -- where both Steve and Tony have been friends on the same team with neither of them secretly being evil and where they have had big roles to play in the event itself. Both Steve and Tony have a lot to do in the mainline and Tony has an entire issue about him. Also, though I think it has its flaws, AXE is definitely much kinder to Tony than a lot of the other comics featuring Tony have been in a while. It portrays Tony and Steve as friends and as heroes genuinely trying to do good. And if you're like "isn't that what most superhero comics are like?" then you haven't been reading a lot of Iron Man comics in the past several years, although that is maybe, maybe starting to change.

I also think the setup of AXE is the kind of thing that lends itself to interesting fannish theorizing without being unkind to most of the heroes. I suppose technically it starts out as a hero vs. hero event, depending on who you consider heroes. A faction of Eternals decides that mutants are deviants and decides to wipe them out. The Avengers decide this is a bad idea and they and the remaining Eternals join in on the side of the mutants. Since Eternals have to do what Celestials tell them, the good guys (starring Tony) come up with a plan to reanimate Avengers Mountain (a dead Celestial) and it will become a god to the Eternals again and it'll tell them to knock it off with the mutant-killing. This works. Sort of. Then the Celestial decides it's going to judge the rest of humanity on an individual and a collective basis and everyone has to band together to try to stop it. Steve ends up basically leading humanity in battle and Tony ends up taking point on the strike team trying to bring the Celestial down from the inside. Literally the inside.

So, yes, as a Steve/Tony fan, I enjoy the fact that they're working together. They're friends! They're clearly coming up with plans together and they're concerned about each other and Steve doesn't even blame Tony for being the guy who arguably headed the project that started the mess in the first place.

Also Steve makes some great rallying speeches.

(Don't worry, Steve's fine.)

And Tony also makes some great speeches, honestly, just on a smaller scale.

I feel like the AA references in there are very in-character for Tony.

It's been my experience that fandom tends to really enjoy events that let them sort characters based on their beliefs and powers -- who would win in a fight? Who would support Registration? And this gets you that, and they don't even have to fight each other. Because what a lot of the tie-ins are about is "who passes, who fails, and why?" and so, without even pitting your faves against each other, you get to do the same kind of theorizing. And because Steve and Tony are major characters, we get to see both of their judgments, and we get a lot about Tony's.

And it's really cool, I think, because it absolutely does not go the way you think it would go. It does not go the way they think it will go. Because Steve is one of the very first to fail -- and Tony is at his side, wondering who possibly has a chance to pass if Steve fails. So Steve basically spends the whole rest of the event clearly feeling like a massive failure and trying to pull himself together for the rest of humanity. I have feelings about this.

And Tony, in a move that surprises everyone including himself, passes. There is a whole issue devoted to this and I really like it except for a couple of points I will detail below and also the fact that it requires us to acknowledge that Cantwell's run happened, which is a thing I was really trying to not do. Anyway, it has a great callback to The Confession.

Tony just doesn't want to let Steve down.

The whole thing is interesting. It gives you a lot to think about. They're clearly still both unsettled about this by the end of the event, and then Tony asks Steve to go hot-tubbing with him, which. You know. There's potential there. I and my massive WIP clearly think there's potential there.

So that's a lot of fun. At least, I think so.

This event has a downside for me, which is that it has a Did Not Do The Research problem. I think this is most apparent in AXE Avengers, the issue all about Tony, which includes such odd developments as "Tony agrees with the assertion that he likes to date people who are parental figures with strong moral compasses" (I have literally no idea where this is coming from, as I would have said that he likes to date people to try to kill him) and "the Celestial, in the form of Howard, tells Tony that they wanted him so badly but then he wasn't a great father to Tony." I feel like "we wanted you so badly" is an interesting way of describing "we adopted you solely because we needed a decoy son to save the life of our biological son." If this had been by any other writer, I would have said, oh, well, I guess they just didn't read the adoption arc. This is by Kieron Gillen. You know, the guy who wrote the adoption arc.

There are a couple of other places in the event itself where the plot doesn't match up to itself across comics, which you would probably expect in tie-ins except… these were all also by Kieron Gillen. So after Steve dies and is reborn from an egg, naked, in the Avengers Mansion kitchen (don't worry about it), he either has enough time to get dressed and talk to Tony before the strike team heads out (if you believe Death To The Mutants) or Tony is already on-mission when Steve hatches (if you believe the mainline). These are, again, both by the same writer.

Anyway, if you believe the version where Steve gets to wish Tony well, it's very sweet:

There is also one further instance where Not Doing The Research isn't a problem, per se, but there was one canonical reference that AXE Avengers could have made, that the entire issue was leading me to think that it was going to make, and then it got there and it didn't, presumably because Gillen didn't know it, and I was so confused because it would have made the issue so much stronger.

So the culmination of AXE Avengers features the Celestial reenacting Tony's parents' car accident, which the Celestial is using as an analogy for the disaster the world is currently going through, and asks Tony what Tony will do. Tony immediately heads to the car and starts trying to repair it and explains that it may not make a difference, but he has to try, and if he works hard enough, no one has to die in a car crash.

It's a nice moment. It's very Tony. It's very touching. It seems like a philosophy he would espouse. It is also an established canon fact that is thirty years old.

In Iron Man #288, we learn that the first thing Tony did after his parents' death was find out what the cause of the crash was (a flaw in the brake design). Then he spent forty hours redesigning the brakes in that car model, bought the car company, and implemented his new, improved brake design. So no one else was ever going to die in a crash like that.

So that thing he says in AXE Avengers that he would do, hypothetically, about fixing the car so no one else would die? He did it. It wasn't hypothetical. He actually 100% did that exact thing, in canon, when faced with this exact situation. So you can kind of see why I was expecting the AXE Avengers issue to refer to this, because I figured this was him describing the thing that he did. It would have been the perfect thing for him to mention. I just assumed that was what was going on here and we were leading up to that.

The issue does not refer to this fact, at all.

I don't know, I just thought it was a bizarre omission. I guess no one involved with this issue knew enough to mention it.

Also I feel like if I were the Avengers I personally would not want to move right back into living in the dead Celestial corpse as soon as it died and the fighting was over. They cannot be hurting that badly for real estate. I'm just saying.

But overall? Yeah, great event. I loved AXE Judgment Day. Give me ten more just like it.

[horse-girl-anthy]

one of the things I struggled with understanding in YKA was the conflicting depictions of bears. there was a sense that they were the "Other," "those who do not follow," deviants, or repressed female sexuality, but that felt at odds with the bear society shown to us by Ginko in episode 7. the conceit there seemed to be that on either side of the Door of Friendship are realms where people behave about the same. if that’s the case, how are the bears supposed to be the representation of what is excised from society?

what I’ve come to now is that the best way to read YKA is that the bear world and girl world are two levels on top of each other. maybe whether a character sees the bear world, or sees themself as a bear, has more to do with their perception of the world than anything else.

Lulu lives in a half-bear, half-human fairy tale where she's a princess but stops being the most important person in the world. Yuriika seems to be the only bear in her world growing up--she’s an abandoned cub trying to be a human girl well enough that she will be rewarded by love. 

Ginko’s backstory was the part of the show that made me lose the thread the most, the war motif especially. it didn’t do much for me because it felt like it conflicted with everything else we were getting shown about this world. 

however, taking the above approach, I think that the sequence is revealing of how Ginko sees the world and larger themes of the work. firstly, Ginko is also an abandoned child, a child who was almost purged. she sees herself and her peers as bears because to her the world is an animalistic fighting ground where the strong win. she gets taken in by the church and finds Kumaria, which gives her some kind of promise of being found and loved. she thinks she will get that if she does what she’s told, but instead, she’s manipulated into being a child soldier. 

the war scene itself was hard for me to read. obviously it’s absurd, but again, I was tripped up by trying to understand the girls vs. bears metaphor. I think the idea is that people make up arbitrary reasons to fight and kill each other, defining themselves in contrast to the Other. and within groups, people purge others in order to solidify their bond. therefore, bears must worry about being associated with humans and humans must worry about being associated with bears, lest they face purging. 

while I used to feel that that theme was a bit simplistic and conflicted with the conception of bears as the repressed Other of girls, now I think it works. the layering of these two themes allows the show to deal with both inner and outer division. the point of the Door of Friendship is that in order to connect with anyone as a person, you have to reach out to them in a way that requires you to let go of self-other distinctions. 

Jung said, “the meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.” if you chose to be with someone, who you are is going to change, and change can be scary. it’s easier to stay hidden and unhurt. standing out can get you killed by those who’ve chosen to be invisible; however, that’s the only path to connection, authenticity, and wholeness of being. 

[fuckit-hero-of-trains]

Write about Tongs you coward

Some Tongs content for the many people that requested her!!!! I'm so glad people seem to like Tongs because oh boy do I have plans for a fic.

Four would like to say that the sound of shattering glass at dark o’clock at night is an unusual occurrence. He’d like to say that the sound is unexpected. Suspicious. Odd. He’d like to say that the sound sends him bolting upright in bed. That it sends him stumbling down the stairs to check on his shop.

Four would like to say those things. He really would.

They might have even been true at one point.

Now?

Now the sound of shattering glass disturbing him in the middle of his sleep cycle at bullshit o’clock merely sends him rolling over so he can muffle a groan into his pillow.

One night.

One peaceful night.

Was that really too much to ask for?

The sound of continued, muffled scrabbling from downstairs answers that question with a resounding yes, yes apparently that is too much to ask for What a couple of assholes Hey We happen to like those assholes Speak for yourself!

Four waits for the sound to die down before rolling back over and staring at the ceiling.

All is quiet for a blessed moment.

...Maybe they’re done?

…

…

…

The sound of something long and metallic hitting the floor with a resonant CRACK says No they aren’t God damn it That’s our queue!

Four rolls back over and mashes his face more fully into his pillow and groans a little louder for a second before slowly dragging himself into a sitting position. He blindly fumbles with a candle and matchbox  on the nightstand– usually used for late night reading but which have gained this new almost nightly use– eventually managing to get the thing lit.

It's not a particularly strong candle. Not nearly as efficient at lighting up a room as their lantern but it does its job well enough, creating a five foot bubble of light around Four so he can see the stairs.

Based on the way the footsteps and clattering and muffled cursing comes to an abrupt halt, it also does its job in telling the other tenants of the house that they’ve been caught. Four takes the last couple of stairs at a stomp, just to drive home just how not happy he is about having to do this again.

Once at the bottom of the steps, the smithy takes a quick survey of the storefront. Nothing broken or out of place. Not that he had really expected otherwise. The last time these two got into one of their “late night disagreements” as Red called them in either the shop or the forge, Four had split, giving them not just a piece of his mind, but every piece of his mind. They weren't done lecturing and yelling and guilt tripping and sneering until the sun had peeked over the horizon. No doubt the deviants wanted to avoid a repeat performance.

Which just leaves the kitchen.

Four shoves open the door with probably more force than is necessary while pushing the candle forward so he can survey the damage.

Though the candle barely lights up the room, it shows Four exactly what he needs to see: the bright gleam of several pieces of silverware on the floor, glinting amongst the shards and dirt of a now destroyed potted plant.

It also shows him the culprits: two pairs of eyes, one at the height of the counter top, wide and round and flickering between green and orange in the candle light, and another pair floating up by the ceiling, glowing a deep crimson.

“She started it,” says the crimson eyes.

“I didn't ask,” Four replies blandly, setting the candle on the floor beside the mess. He grimaces at the sight. The casualty was his mini cactus. One from the Desert of Doubt that Zelda had given to him, stating that even he couldn't kill it.

How long did this one last Three weeks New record It might not be dead One of its ‘arms’ are off But the roots look to be in alright shape We’ll repot it tomorrow With what pot Well–

“She broke that too,” Sounds above Four’s head.

A hiss crackles from the counter top.

“Hey, no!” spits back the first voice, “That doesn't matter! You touched it last which means you broke it!”

A responding hiss followed by a grumbling meow.

There is a scandalized gasp from overhead followed by a spat out, “Why don't you come over here and say that to my face, you overgrown throw pillow!”

“Shadow,” Four cuts in, voice as tired and exasperated as he can make it,“You’re arguing with a cat.”

Four doesn’t need the candle to know that a scowl accompanies Shadow’s annoyed tisk.

“Oh, don’t give me that,” Shadow grumbles, finally lowering himself from the air and stepping into Four’s bubble of light so the hero can see his glower. “You talk to her all the time. How you managed to find such a smartass of a cat is beyond me. I swear, she says the worst shit when you can't understand her.”

There is a soft thump from behind him and then a large, warm body presses itself into Four’s side, purring already.

“Kissass,” Shadow mutters, crossing his arms.

Tongs merely cuddles closer, sweeping herself across Four’s side until she can push her head beneath Four’s chin, trilling happily.

Four rolls his eyes at the both of them, gives Tongs a quick scratch behind her ears, and straightens up, taking his candle with him.

“Oh, I’m sure she’s downright vulgar,” Four says, not even trying to sound sympathetic as he walks over to the fireplace to grab the broom, Tongs threading between his legs with every step. “Just like I’m sure she’s the one who suggested… hmm, what was it again?”

Four takes hold of the broom and turns back to face Shadow. He folds one hand over the top of the wooden handle and rests his chin there, letting a faux thoughtful expression cross over his face.

Below him, Tongs sits, her posture tall and perfect, her tail curled around her paws smugly.

Shadow sticks his tongue out at her.

Four clears his throat and Shadow's attention snaps back toward him. This time, Four simply raises an eyebrow which sends Shadow’s eyes all around the room, like he's looking for any other words than the ones Four is thinking of.

Eventually, he admits defeat, throwing his head back petulantly with an exaggerated sigh.

“...Night forging…” the shade mutters.

“Night forging!” Four repeats brightly, sarcastically, striding past his shadow back towards the mess. “That's what it was.”

“She did actually suggest that though!” Shadow insists, exasperated. “She thought if we did some of your work in the night, you would have more free time during the day. It’s not my fault I didn't know how to run your forge!”

Four pulls up short at that, turning to glance at Tongs, who had leap back up onto the counter to supervise their cleaning effort.

“Did you actually suggest night forging?”

Green-orange flickering eyes blink at him slowly as she tilts her head with a purr, the picture of innocence.

Four sighs with a crooked smile, holding out the broom for Shadow to take, which he other does after only a moment's hesitation.

Tongs is much too big to be picked up anymore. Has been for most of the time she's been with him. But if there's one thing his adventures and occupation are good for, it's maintaining strength.

Though she would stand only a head shorter than him if she were to be on her hind legs, Four hefts the massive cat into his arms. And boy, is she an armful. He can barely contain her length and mountain of long, grey fur in his arms, but even with the second it takes to adjust his hold on her, Tongs simply relaxes into his hold belly up, staring at him.

“You’re supposed to be making sure he doesnt get into trouble,” Four tells her with fake solemnity, ignoring the Hey, I resent that! that sounds from behind them.

Tongs stares at him for a moment, as though considering his light scolding.

And then reaches up and gives Four’s nose a lightning quick bop.

Four laughs.

“You're a brat,” he tells her, turning and beginning to walk back out of the kitchen .

Tongs responds by shifting her shoulders slightly, snuggling more firmly into him even as she smacks him in the mouth with her feathery tail.

“Uh, hello?!”

Four pauses in shouldering open the door and turns to see Shadow, broom in hand, other hand on hip, eyebrows high,  and eyes wide.

“Aren’t you going to make her help clean up?”

Four glances down at Tongs in his arms.

She stares back up at him.

Against his side, he can feel her tail flicking mischievously. He sends her an answering smile.

“She's a cat, Shadow. I’m not sure how much help you expect her to be without opposable thumbs,” Four reminds with a shrug and a grin that only gets smugger as Shadow’s face goes from expectant to disbelieving. “I’m sure you’ve got this. See you in the morning.”

The door swings shut behind Four, muffling any response Shadow may have thrown at his back, leaving the boy and his cat to head upwards, laughing as they head back to bed.

[sunderedandundone]

Not-quite-random GraGoh headcanon

(ETA: Will expand a bit on at some point to integrate with #Paths to Heresy - UrSkek crimes/backstories. ^^ )

So at some point fairly soon here I'm going to put up the big thread of UrSkek worldbuilding and HC that I have plotted out :-) but for the nonce, have this tidbit about GraGoh (aka the Annoying Young Sibling of the Twice-Nine):

As an UrSkek who'd Awakened on an outpost planet rather than Homeworld itself, GraGoh was viewed very slightly askance by their fellow UrSkeks from the day of their arrival. But the first time they actually came to the Eldest's attention in a serious way -- i.e., under suspicion of possibly being a Deviant or Aberration -- was when they played a prank on a work colleague. ...Yes, really. UrSkeks know what humor is and sometimes even indulge in it themselves, but their idea of the socially acceptable limits is far more constrained than Gelflings', or Podlings', to say nothing of rough-and-tumble species like humanity. There's no concept of "punching up" vs. "punching down" -- the point is you're punching, and what's wrong with you that you feel the need to DO that?

If you want a real simulated-belly laugh from an UrSkek, the most reliable way is to show them some logical or mathematical paradox...e.g. Zeno's or Russell's Paradox, or Schrodinger's Cat, except of course it'd need to be a new one to be truly diverting. :-) Other than that, their humor rarely strays beyond modest smiles and chuckles -- wry moments arising from the sort of innocent daily absurdities that crop up even in an [ostensible] utopia. There are a small number of UrSkeks who practice and appreciate the tricky art of the extremely well-worded and fully deniable deadpan (::koff:: LiLii ::koff:: SilSol::), but since the appreciation of such has to be kept just as deadpan for it to work without anyone getting in trouble, most of those UrSkeks stay too locked in pluralistic ignorance to find each other and form any kind of community around it. TL;DR: playing pranks is not okay on Homeworld. GraGoh, of course, thought it was very funny indeed. Unfortunately, no one else was amused. Especially the Eldest, who were unmoved by GraGoh's protestations that no one got hurt; or that the only thing lost was time, and UrSkeks had a goodly supply of that; OR that their colleague's mind had clearly been broadened by the experience, which proved that Surprise could serve a prosocial purpose, and said colleague really needed to get out and enjoy the sunshine more anyway. To their very good fortune (or their very bad fortune? Oh all right, to their very...fortune, let's say), the Eldest decided that GraGoh's adjustment to Homeworld might be greatly improved by catching them up on some of their higher education. They were accordingly put on work sabbatical and sent to the Academy to be...well, not reformed precisely, but...oh all right, reformed. Among their professors was a certain ancient and respected scholar -- why, they even bore the supremely prestigious title, "Giver of New Equations": SoSu the Philosopher. Endnote: NB -- GraGoh was not yet the Explorer during any of this! That came in a slightly later stage of life. Their offworld baby-UrSkek job was much more tradie/hard-hatty -- closer to a combination railroad scout/powerline worker/network guy, which did involve a lot of UNofficial exploring -- and when they first came to Homeworld they worked in a similar, though more senior, 'keep this infrastructure humming' kinda role. ^^