#[ head in my hands in despair ]
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more doodles as i work out this fuckig thang. hep me
#changed the design a bit bc i thought the first ver looked ugly#isat#in stars and time#change god isat#change god#danganronpa#in despair and desperation#head in hands i didnt WANT to make an au.#my art#isat spoilers
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delving deeper into and analyzing king candy's character makes me feel so sick oh mygod
#the. the. the the ht e thethethehteeeeeeUGHHJHGHHH#his ass was NOT supposed to make me feel like this. when he resurfaced in my mind through my dreams i thought he was just gonna be annoying#and attached to me and begging me to return his affections nonstop what do you MEAN his character is actually kind of tragic in a way UGHH#somebody put his ass into therapy RIGHT NOW.#this is all slash positive btw but my god if i said it doesn't make me hold my head in my hands and wail in despair i'd be the biggest liar#- in the world. second to KC himself of course#myco can speak#turbo#king candy#i'm normal i swear
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Katarina: Maria Campbell is exceptionally kind, hard-working and talented, not to mention beautiful and graceous in a way I could never hope to be; I love and admire her greatly for it, and the feeling grows with every moment I spend with her. Anyone would be very lucky to be graced with her companionship and falling for her is as easy as breathing. Status and money are irrelevant to me, nothing would make me happier than living by her side for the rest of our lives. I could kiss her a million times and I actually almost asked her to marry me once. I am heterosexual
#hamefura#my next life as a villainess#otome game no hametsu flag#maria: *clutches head in hands in despair*#marikata#romance in chiaroscuro
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WASNT IT SUPPOSED TO RELEASE TODAY ?????;-&&- WHAT DO YOU MEAN ANOTHER WEEKJJJJJ
#FUCK#head in hands DESPAIR#nevermore webcomic#nevermore#nevermore webtoon#hoping maybe its just my webtoon fucking crashed or smth 😭😭
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the artbook saying they planned on having Cole in da4 to give a compassionate voice wanting to help Solas navigate through his pain and supporting him in front of Rook and the companions, only for the final product to literally just be "bashing Solas hours because he's such a loser for always being alone and he's to blame for literally everything (rightfully so or not)" just fills me with an intense sorrow i will never recover from.
#specifically relating a lot to Solas' loneliness and the despair that comes with it and the guilt and all#only to hear literally every characters in da4 calling him a loser for it#& for the ending being to punish him because how dare you try to fix your mistakes. just go into prison alone (unless romanced) and repent.#'you're free from Mythal' they say by forcing him to give up on something he did rebelling against her bc Mythal tells him to stop#and im supposed to be satisfied with that#genuinely this deep sorrow in my heart will never truly heal#it's one thing that they framed Solas as a villain who had to be stopped#it's another how they are utterly always ruthlessly mocking his vulnerable side to show he's inherently a failure of a man#da4 needed Compassion more than anything else and they scrapped him in the development phase#instead the spirits representing da4 are Spite and Curiosity#for a game and protagonist who's insultingly uncurious for the game that reveals so many mysteries hinted at in the three previous games#but sure seems spiteful about the messy legacy the saga has left them with and just decided to just erase everything controversial instead#head in hands#i wanted to have fun reading Solas' lines but i'm just filled with sorrow again#what was Cole's quote about it again#'Solas-- bright and sad-- observes and accepts. Spirit self-- seeing the soul. Solas-- but somehow sorrows'#ichasalty#ichablogging davg#ichatalks about da
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++ whiteboard drawings with my friends that barely know anything about danganronpa
#my friends wouldn't stop drawing on her face so i drew servant#yes i know the mitten is on the wrong hand. every day i suffer#ultra despair girls#danganronpa#nagito komaeda#transfem nagito komaeda#!#i stole my friend's headcanon for this sorry crow#servant#meshi#?#headache - eipu#im sorry i legally have to kasane teto reference all of my drawings#in one of the photos she's being smacked on the head with a dandy's world medkit
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Thinking about an AU where Ritsu is the one who ends up being Reigen's student instead. Say he's there when Mob sees the sign, dissuades him from going in because "it's probably a scam anyway!" But then of course, little envious Ritsu ends up coming back the next day, unable to help himself at the chance, the possibility that someone could help him develop psychic powers like his brother. He figures Reigen out almost immediately, of course, because he demands to be shown Reigen's power. But Ritsu is desperate, and Reigen has always had a kind way with words, and soon enough Ritsu and Reigen are going ghosts adventures! Leaving Mob behind :') Even more alone than before :'))
And as S&S fills up with things of ACTUAL spiritual significance, like artifacts and purified salt and herbs at Ritsu's obsessive insistence as he tries to find an in to psychic powers and Reigen tries to encourage him without encouraging him, Ritsu and Reigen get closer. Ritsu is more surly than Mob, less inherently trusting and more emotional, more easily annoyed—but he has no reason to hate Reigen in this verse. Reigen has never even met Mob, much less used his powers for his own gain. Reigen grows incredibly fond of this desperate boy, good at everything but the one thing he wants to be good at, and tries to lead him away from those feelings of jealousy and inadequacy. In turn, Ritsu himself is healthier. A little easier going, though still almost perpetually bristling with temper 😮💨
He and Mob are closer as a result! He becomes Mob's only friend, more open with his own thoughts and feelings and, thanks to Reigen, far less afraid of him. Mob is more emotionally stunted than ever, and though he has some tentative acquaintances in the Telepathy club, he's still mostly alone and isolated. All of Reigen's helpful advice on dealing with his autism (identified by how Ritsu speaks about his Shige-nii and the behaviors he says he exhibits) is relayed through Ritsu, who comes to understand Mob a little more because of it.
But—oh, didn't I mention? This is a soulmate AU :)
Ritsu has two marks; one for Mob, and one for Reigen. Mob never develops a mark for Ritsu, but he expects that, obviously. Reigen also doesn't develop a mark for Ritsu, but given their age difference, Ritsu also expects that. He's a smart boy, and he knows that not all soulmarks are reciprocated. It's fine. They don't need to be. Ritsu has mostly made peace with his lot in life.
That is, before Mob and Reigen finally meet in person. And instantly develop matching soulmarks.
...Ritsu's psychic awakening is only slightly better than his brother's.
#ive been thinking about this for literal DAYS i need it out of my head thank you#mobreirit#ritreimob#ritrei#ritsumob#mobrei#reimob#mob psycho 100#deshi ritsu au#ritsu has his awakening later btw#not in the moment#its only after watching reigen and mob subconciously revolve around each other the whole three hours of his birthday party#ritsu very calmly stews and then goes to bed and wakes up three-thousand feet in the air. his room is ruined.#DESPAIR my friend JEALOUSY ENVY LOVE PINING#reigen is the only person here with a brain cell istg#after much angst and secret keeping and lies and anger everything comes out and reigen just#you have two soulmarks. i might only have one but i have TWO hands. so does mob.#even without soulmarks i like the idea of ritsu thinking of reigen as something just for him but IMMEDIATELY getting the rug yanked from#under him when reigen and mob finally meet and click like the mirrored outcasts they are#both of them loving ritsu but not the way he wants to be loved :'3#kageyama ritsu#reigen arataka#kageyama shigeo#mob#idk man ive had mobreirit on the brain#tw shared blood
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i cannot fucking believe that my enjoyment of death note is seriously turning out to be actually useful in my real life
#banging my head against the wall#what timeline am i even living in#guess what everybody i learned how to be helpful in this situation i'm in from FUCKING DEATH NOTE#no i will not be providing context just know that my head is in my hands and this is slightly hilarious and i am full of despair#el talks#dn
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so wholly obsessed with the idea that mia is the one who taught phoenix how to play poker in the first place
#like they're just casual games of course nothing serious#and phoenix loses the first few games against her until it's like a switch is flipped in his head and suddenly he's winning over and over#poker face off the shits that disappears as soon as the game's over (like feenie during his testimonies until mia snapped at him)#and when phoenix's first trial comes around and he starts out floundering like a fish out of water some corner of mia's brain is just#despairing like WHERE is the phoenix that kicked my ass at poker. come ON#and then in aa3 maya mentions that phoenix owes her money from losing at some card game#it doesn't specify the card game but it would not surprise me if it was poker. it also wouldn't surprise me if phoenix was letting maya win#(because they talk about the game in the past tense and it makes me think it might've been in the aftermath of the engarde trial.#of course phoenix would let maya win).#and then. when he gets disbarred. when he gets that job at the borscht bowl acting as an attraction to customers who just want to try their#hand at beating the unbeatable champion. maybe sometimes he would think about casual games with mia and what she would think of him now.#EXPLODES!#phoenix wright#mia fey#ace attorney
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that book was pretty good, yea. glad I came back around and finished it.
the (part 1 - end) at the end is so funny - you mean after they resolved all the problems in the story, that's just the beginning? The beginning of the rest of their lives? lmao
#now reading#it was “suicide girl” btw#there's some weird aspects about it but i'm willing to overlook a bit of sleaze#it's very hot-blooded and the art is sick#but more importantly it resonated with me deeply#as someone who's survived my own suicide a number of times#“as long as i have this burning sun in my heart... i will never throw away my life away ever again!”#this is what i really believe#i wanna read thru it in japanese coz the scanlations are clumsy at best - maybe i'll pick up a zenkan lmao#the author really likes chuuni wordplay#but the various scanlators still did pretty good on some of the most important beats#“suicide kills the hearts of those left behind”#that line was hanging in my head for like three or four years after I read the first couple chapters#good job girls. nice work#hit the showers#it'd be nice to appreciate the art in print rather than on the tv which is how i read this one#there's a bunch of gay shit in here too#bunch of traumatized magical girls who have a newfound desire to live (gay style)#the scene where they're all sleeping naked together is absolutely indulgent yuri brainrot#stupid book#kinda rly good tho#probably worth a read if you've ever come close to the edge. if you like me know what it's like to grapple with despair#but it's not something i can *recommend* owing to the subject matter#on the other hand maybe you need to read it in which case you'll probably check it out on your own anyways#wonder if any of the author's other books are any good?
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I understand why people carry dt17 scrooge's teasing into glomscrooge content based on the show, but please consider how embarrassing it would be for him to admit that he likes this glomgold. I'd kill myself honestly
#scromtxt#I like to think that while scrooge does figure out that glomgold likes him before glomgold himself does#he figures out his own emotions first#and is absolutely inconsolable#he like. starts off with furious denial but is smart enough to get over that quickly#so then he just sinks into complete despair#not because it's unrequited or anything. but because it's glomgold#at this point in my head#scrooge subconsciously sees glomgold as an equal and holds a bit of respect for him#but he hasn't consciously caught onto that fact yet#so he just fucking hates himself. he thinks this is a fate worse than death#he can't tease glomgold properly now because he knows glomgold won in the stupidest way possible#do I think dt17 scrooge can admit that he *cares* about glomgold? yes. he literally wants him to be happy#do I think dt17 scrooge would rather dig himself a shallow grave than admit he wants to hold glomgold's hand? also yes. sorry#dt17#scromgold#dt17 scrooge#ducktales 2017#I hope this isn't too much of a hot take or anything#<- man who is deathly afraid of conflict finds himself having Opinions
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it's actually fucking crazy because mizuki and ena's dynamic is literally everything i could ever want and have wanted in the majority of my ship dynamics ever and yet somehow it never really stuck to me. rattles the cage bars LET ME INNNNNN LET ME INNNNN IT'S LITERALLY ANYTHING I COULD EVER WANT WHY ISN'T IT CLICKING
#IS IT BECAUSE THEIR DYNAMIC IS ACTUALLY CANON?? IS THAT IT. DOES IT NEED TO BE SOMETHING UNNATAINABLE FOR ME TO WANT IT#IN A NOT SO DISTANT UNIVERSE I'M PROBABLY AN INSANE MIZUENAER. AND YET. AND FUCKING YET#IT HAS EVERYTHING PLEASE WHY AM I NOT INSANE ABOUT IT#if this reaches main tags somehow i'll cry this isn't ship hate this is ship despair over how my brain isn't clicking over it#when this is literally like. my dream ship dynamic. i Think#holds head in hands maybe it's just too perfect for me idfk please i Know i should be Crazy and Insane about this and Yet#LET !!! ME !!!! IN !!!!!!!!#i remember there was a spark of brainworm when i read the event with lower as the comm#that final quote from mizuki that was like “that's a lie. i just lied to her. sorry ena. ” made it Immediately one of my favorite events#so. shakes my brain where are the brainworms huh. where's the insanity c'mon i know it was almost there at one point#augh. the popular pairing effect I Guess. sigh. sigh#mfs when they have a 5-course meal of their favorite foods and yet Somehow don't have the appetite for it like ????? :sob:
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Sbsbshshsjjkkk BEV.
I look at your blog and it’s just a bunch of sexy nun Dan posts in a row lmao
are you okay?!! /POS POS POS
LISTEN.
#LISTEN. LISTEN FJSVDJSBSKSBSN#Attraction is not something i pretend to understand (aroace spec). HOWEVER.#As someone whos felt it like. maybe 4 times????? WOW#HE LOOKED SO GOOD.#passing out apology notes to all my mutuals for flooding their dash with Dan Howell Sexy Nun#so Gay and also Normal about this#IVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH THE LIKE 5 TOTAL PICS FROM LAST YEAR FOR 3 DAYS#AND THEN??? 22 MINUTE VIDEO??????? DEATH AND DESPAIR DEATH AND DESPAIR HEAD IN HANDS HEAD IN HANDS#bro he looked so good. he looked so good#BDKSBSKD UGH#laying face down on the floor. why was he Like That the entire video he was SO flirty???‽????????#NOT COMPLAINING. FOR THE RECORD#BFKSBSBBDJSB UGH.#shakes you by the shoulders. he looks so good#beverly says stuff#asks#loz tag#dan and phil#THIS IS ALL /LH BUT /GEN#the bev is gay chronicles#...i also scheduled a few so its not all in one go💀
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well. in honor of the nordys knot blog happy 7 months to the saddest discord exchange of my life
#'saddest' bc it made me put my head in my hands. in despair#the mortifying ordeal of being known: not worth it
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Having songs stuck in your head is such a cool concept in theory, but in practice?? ....like wdym I have the; "Who do you think you are? Who do you think I am? What do you wanna say? What do you think will change? Maybe I'm afraid of you. Maybe I'm afraid of you." and NOT TO MENTION the "I'll bite the hand that feeds me Bite the hand. Bite the hand that needs me. Bite the hand." part of Bite The Hand by Boygenius playing on loop in my brain??? Like... wdym??? Hmmm??? Why would you do this to me?????? What have I done to the gods?? Can they at least tell me why they're punishing me??!
#my brain is rotting#and slowly leaking out of my left ear#i am melting into a puddle of despair soup#why why why#WHY#boygenius#bite the hand#this has RUINED me y'all#i am no more#but was I ever?#WAS I??#ARE YOU??#song stuck in my head
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i could literally be watching the apothecary diaries rn..
#i actually could NOT be watching it rn because of the TasksTM but i WANt to!!!!!!!#*bangs head against wall*#i wanna watch it sooooo bad ughhhhh. only two more episodes....*throws up my hands in despair*
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