#??? has it been long enough that it wouldn't/shouldn't be considered spoilers?

[soul-of-the-sanada]

I didn't like Luke as much when I played his route the first time, going dramatic. but I just finished his romantic end and... holy shit. That was... so freakin romantic????? I didn't expect that depth of emotion and complexity from him. I actually quit reading his route for abt 2 weeks. If it hadn't been for this collection event? I probably would have dropped it or rushed it right before the next route drops.

Plus clavis??? wingman af. he believes in the power of love and I still love him so much. jin? I love him a++ bby you're doing wonderfully

[posletsvet]

Some further chapter 235 thoughts

Alright, a little disclaimer before I get carried away: this may and chances are will in some ways contradict my thoughts from when I last talked about it here. Right after the spoilers came out my thinking was driven by emotion, and before I got a chance to sit down and shape my opinion properly, the emotion was what defined it. I guess I shouldn't have written it down in the first place, as all I really did was allowed my feelings to get the better of me and judged the situation biased. My bad, really,,

With that out of the way, my opinion has shifted since, and as I've come to see it, there's at least one important thing that Sukuna vs Gojo fight did, and that is precisely cementing Gojo's position as the strongest. It's already a pre-established truth when we enter the story, but it's put into question with Sukuna finding a way out of his seal through Yuuji consuming that finger. Sukuna merely being brought back to existence is already enough to challenge Gojo's title. Is Satoru Gojo rightfully the pinnacle of Jujutsu, or is he, as Sukuna brags, just somebody who is considered the strongest when the King of Curses wasn't around to provide a contrast? Is he the most powerful sorcerer of all eras, or is he simply the one of his time, comparatively mild and peaceful? Two characters getting to be named the only honoured one throughout heaven and earth is an explicit contradiction, so how could both statements be true at the same time? These were the questions hanging in the air from the beginning, looming over both the audience and the characters' heads, and Gege undoubtedly has been laying the groundwork for Gojo and Sukuna's confrontation since the very start. So as much as I or anybody else may dislike it, the purpose of this fight was never solely to rescue Megumi. The debate over who should claim the title of the all-time strongest had come into question long before the necessity to save Megumi entered the equasion, it's been a thread unravelling itself throughout the whole narrative. If Gojo's arc is about to reach its conclusion, that could only be possible with this uncertainty dispelled. Now that we have a concrete answer, the narrative can move on from there.

What's also been a reappearing idea in the manga since the outset, is the notion that the strength positions individual's value in Jujutsu society, brought to us from perspectives of various characters. However, it's not the strength alone which defines one's place, or rather it's not all kinds of strength that are accepted as valuable and deserving of admiration. In actuality, what really matters is how well the person in question fits into the conventional image, which is backed up by centuries of tradition followed by those in charge. Otherwise the instances when extremely powerful in their own ways individuals are driven out to the outskirts of society just because they don't fit into the mold of traditionalistic beliefs enough wouldn't be present in the narrative, we just wouldn't have characters like Toji and Maki. The moral of their stories is, essentially, that in order to be recognized as an individual and have at least some singnificant say when it comes to making decisions in the Jujutsu world, you need to uphold a standard.

And by whom is that standard set?

My thoughts keep circling back to what Gakuganji once said regarding the defining forces in their society which Grade 1 sorcerers are, whereas Special Grades are rather 'something of a misrepresentation'. I guess those who are assigned Grade 1 really do have a greater influence on the world around them, and that is not due to their strength, but rather because they're setting an ideal for those below them in the hierarchical order. They're better fit to serve as role models, and in society where climbing to the top is a way to ensure survival, younger and less experienced sorcerers have no choice but to look up to those who thrive, seeking a way to achieve it, too. The strong get to dictate the standard, yes, but it's still essential that they uphold said standard themselves, providing an example. This even finds a reflection in the procedure of promotion. One needs to be deemed worthy upon receiving recommendations, and that requires having characteristics which fall in line with what is conventionally approved of. So while Gojo is considered the strongest of his generation, he is not, paradoxically, the most powerful player in the field, not in terms of political and influential significance. Not when he displays a mindset that is a stand-alone against traditional beliefs held by the absolute majority. That is a contradiction pointed out by Sukuna in early chapters: he finds it amusing that someone so strong plays by somebody else's rules.

How is all that relevant to the importance of Gojo winning the fight?

As we know, Special Grades tend to be lone wolves, too vastly outnumbered for their voice to be heard clearly. For instance, who in the Jujutsu world knows of Yuki's research and what fruit it bears, what insight into the nature of cursed energy her investigation provides? She's stigmatized for being a delinquent (I think it's no coincidence that the only thing Geto heard about her was how she didn't carry out her duties as a sorcerer), the work of her life going unnoticed with her death. It might be a complicated way for me to get to the point, but what I'm trying to say is that Gojo, as recognizable within sorcerer's society as he is, probably isn't that different from Yuki. No one really remembers his goals when asked to describe him. He's the strongest, and that's the only lingering impression of him. By coming out of this fight triumphant and therefore cementing his position on the top of Jujutsu society, Gojo makes sure he will be remembered -- just like Sukuna is still remembered, even though centuries have passed since he was at the peak of his power. With surpassing the King of Curses under his belt, Gojo's name is now set in stone, and so is his example for the future generations. This means Gojo's ideology will outlive him, and even if his beliefs might seem delusional as of now, it doesn't mean this won't change in the years to follow. Because the adequacy of one or the other set of ideas can only be measured by the context of society they exist in, and now that society has a stimulus to reconstruct itself, adapting to the views of someone who's proven himself ultimately superior judging by its own standarts. So yes, in the end Gojo and Sukuna both fought for the sake of proving they could win, but while Sukuna was after personal gain in terms of self-affirmation and growth, I'd argue that for Gojo it was rather about setting an example.

Now, to once again address my previous thoughts and how they've changed, I no longer think it's Gojo's loneliness that should be breached in order to bring about change. Gojo's being lonely is converted into somewhat of a symbol by the narrative, and, using a little bit of metaphor here, symbols should remain static, unchanged in order to carry meaning. In that sense Gojo still represents the flawed past which the main characters of the manga need to break away from, making him the last strong sorcerer forced to fight alone and trapped in his own position. Gojo as a side character needs to stay at least in some ways inferior for the protagonists of the story to outshine him, claiming the spotlight back. After all, it's all about giving way to the new generation, and Gojo himself acknowledges it well. He as a sorcerer of the previous, older generation is too well-ingrained in that very society which the whole narrative focuses on deconstructing. It's about surpassing your predecessors, and if anything, making sure his students will do so is Gojo's main goal as a teacher.

[ghostboneswrites2]

Doe Eyes - CH14 - We’re In.

Chapter List

Warnings: Violence, Gore, Spoilers, Character death

Masterlist // Taglist

        Rick and the others returned with a large haul of canned food. There was a sort of feast that night, everyone filling plates like it was a buffet. You sat near Carol and Daryl in the pews, digging into your canned carrots and green beans.

        "That's all you got?" Carol asked you, giving you a funny look.

        "I don't like beans and canned meat freaks me out." You admitted. She laughed.

        "All things considered and you're afraid of canned meat?"

        "Not afraid!" You laughed. "Just isn't appetizing." 

        "There were some peas up there, I think." She said.

        "Ew." You scrunched your nose.

        "You're pickier than my daughter was." She shook her head, chuckling as she took a bite.

        "You had a daughter?" You asked.

        "Yeah. I did. She was the sweetest thing, but she was a picky eater. Just like you." She lamented.

        "I'm sorry she isn't here anymore. I would've loved to meet her." You consoled.

        "It's good that she isn't." Carol nodded. "She didn't need to go through all the things we have."

        "She would've been fine." Daryl said. "Would've been kickin' ass like the rest of us."

        "Yeah, maybe, but that wouldn't have been her. She shouldn't have to do that." Carol sighed. She didn't seem sad, she seemed at peace, but still, you didn't know how to respond. You never had a kid, let alone experienced that kind of loss. 

        "I'd like to propose a toast." Abraham spoke up at the front of the church, grabbing everyone's attention. "I look around this room, and I see survivors. Each and every one of you has earned that title. To the survivors." He said, raising his glass.

        "To the survivors!" You all said, toasting back.

        "Is that all you wanna be?" Abraham continued. "Wake up in the mornin', fight the undead pricks, forage for food, go to sleep at night with two eyes open, rinse and repeat? 'Cause you can do that. I mean, you got the strength, you got the skill. Thing is, for you people, for what you can do, that's just surrender. Now, we get Eugene to Washington, he will make the dead die and the living will have this world again. And, that is not a bad takeaway for a little road trip. Eugene, what's in D.C.?"

        Eugene cleared his throat.

        "Infrastructure constructed to withstand pandemics even of this fubar magnitude. That means food, fuel, refuge. Restart." Eugene replied.

        "However this plays out, however long it takes for the restart button to kick in, you can be safe there. Safer than you've been since this whole thing started. Come with us. Save the world for that little one. Save it for yourselves. Save it for the people out there who don't got nothin' left to do except survive." Abraham added.

        "What was that?" Rick asked Judith as she cooed and babbled. "I think she knows what I'm about to say. If she's in, I'm in. We're in."

----

        Carol had disappeared, so you and Daryl decided to go see what she was doing. Daryl said he had a feeling where she'd snuck off to, and sure enough he was right where he thought he'd find her, by some old car. She had it turned on and gassed up when you got there.

        "What're you doin'?" Daryl asked as the two of you stepped out of the brush.

        "I don't know." Carol admitted.

        There was the sound of an engine in the distance, and Daryl pulled the two of you down behind the back of the car. The three of you watched a car zoom by on the street that ran perpendicular to the road you were on. Daryl sprinted over and watched as it drove on. He ran back and started smashing the tail lights off the car Carol had found.

        "What are you doing?!" She yelled.

        "They got Beth!" He said. "C'mon. Get in!"

        And with that, the three of you piled into the car, Daryl in the driver's seat, Carol riding passenger, and you in the center of the back seat so you'd have a clear view. 

        You guys followed the car for a while, making small talk along the way.

        "So it was just you two and Beth after?" Carol asked.

        "Yeah." Daryl said.

        "You saved her?" She wondered.

        "She's tough." You said. "She saved herself."

        "We were out there for a while." Daryl continued. "We got cornered, she got out in front of us and I don't know.. She was just gone."

        "We came out of the trees and a car was pulling away with a white cross on the window." You added.

        "Just like that one?" She asked.

        "Yup." Daryl nodded.

        "Rick's gonna wonder where we went." You said.

        "Tank's runnin' low." Daryl sighed.

        "We can end this quick, just run them off the road." Carol suggested.

        "Nah, we're good for a bit." Daryl shook his head.

        "If they're holding her somewhere we can get it out of the driver." She said.

        "Yeah, but what if he doesn't talk?" You asked.

        "Then we're back to square one."  Daryl replied. "Right now we got the advantage. We'll see who they are, if they're a group, and what they can do. And then we'll do what we gotta do to get her back."

        "They're heading north." Carol observed. "I-85."

        You could see Atlanta off in the distance, the outline of the cityscape looming in the dark. Whoever you were following was unaware of your presence because Daryl kept the headlights off. He followed them into the city, creeping around each turn. He pulled to a stop when they did, a few building lengths behind them to maintain cover.

        "The hell is he waitin' for?" He wondered aloud. A man exited the passenger side of the car. "There's two of 'em."

        "Is that a cop?" You asked, gripping the small pistol in your belt. Carol seemed to have the same idea, pulling a silvery revolver from her waistline. 

        "Maybe they've seen us." She suggested.

        The man rounded the corner of the building they parked beside, walking out of view. The three of you waited in silence. A walked slapped Carol's window, hissing at the meal he it couldn't reach. She jumped and let out a breath, but you all ultimately ignored it. The cop came back, dropping two bicycles down on the corner of the street. He was dragging something into the street when he noticed the walker clawing at Carol's window.. He took a double take, probably wondering what the walker was clawing for.

        Daryl went to start the car when the officer got back into the passenger seat, but it wouldn't start.

        "Aw, shit." He said. "Tank's tapped. They'd have taken the bypass and they didn't. They must be holed up in the city somewhere."

        "Must be a load of fuckin' psychos. Who the hell would want to stay here? This place is infested." You commented.

        Over in the distance, you could see walkers slowly emerging from the darkness, probably drawn by the lights and sound of the engine.

        "We gotta move." Daryl said.

        "We could find a place to hole up until sunlight." You suggested.

        "I know a place." Carol said. "It's just a couple blocks from here. We can make it."

        She rolled her window down and stabbed the walker outside and the three of you made a run for it. It was mostly smooth sailing to the hideout she talked about. You and Carol took down walkers as they approached while Daryl worked on breaking into the building as quietly as possible.

        "Come on." Daryl called to the two of you as you paused walker slaying. Carol froze as if she heard something before the two of you ran inside. The place was mostly clear, any walkers were already taken down. Daryl took some keys off of one that was against the wall, and you guys held up in a small office.

        "You used to work here or something?" He asked.

        "Something." She replied.

        She took the keys from Daryl and led you two through another door within the office. The next room had some bunkbeds and other random things. 

        "What is this place?" You asked.

        "Temporary housing." She answered. You looked down to a table by the bunks and saw a thick book labeled 'Treating Survivors of Childhood Abuse'. 

        "You came here?" Daryl inquired, looking at the same book.

        "We didn't stay." She said. He set his crossbow on the table.

        "I'll take the top bunk." Carol announced, setting her weapons up top and climbing up. 

        You and Daryl looked at each other. You shrugged. "You can bunk with me." You smirked. He huffed a breathy chuckle and shook his head.

        "It's alright." He shook his head.

        "C'mon. I'm real cuddly." You urged.

        "Jesus, get a room, you two." Carol rolled her eyes before she laid down.

        Daryl studied you before he sighed, taking off his vest and his jacket. You set your gun down on the table by his bow. You thought about your crowbar and wondered if you could find a new one in the city while you were there. There was bound to be one laying around somewhere, and you never got yours back from Terminus. 

        "You two should sleep. I'll keep first watch." Carol said as she sat up and slid off the bunk, walking over to a window.

        "Place is locked up pretty tight." You said.

        "I know." She replied.

        "So we're good then." Daryl added.

        "I'll keep first watch." She insisted. "I don't mind."

        You and Daryl shrugged and got ready to sleep. You crawled on the bottom bunk and scooted close to the wall in case Daryl decided to take you up on your offer. 

        You were surprised to feel the weight on the bed shift as he laid down. You thought he'd probably take Carol's bunk until she laid down. 

        "Now we can stink up the mattress together." You joked. You didn't realize how tired you were until he laid down next to you. 

        "Whatever, it'll be your stench soakin' into the sheets, not mine." He fired back.

        "Oh, please. You smell like trees and dead squirrels."

        "Mm. Better than onions and dead bodies."

        You kicked his leg with the side of your foot.

        "Just the onions, thank you very much." You scoffed.

        "Nah. Your nose just got so used to it you can't smell it no more." He teased.

        "Whatever, Dixon." You sighed as you rolled over.

[gyubby99]

"She's so naive she's obviously the worst sister-" WITH ALL DUE RESPECT GO ARGUE WITH A WALL!

In honor of her birthday I will be ranting about this. Yes.

Like- how the hell do you EXPECT someone to have her literal memories of her sister's powers ERASED from her head to know about the said powers?? "She should've known better" MY GIRLIE WAS SHUT OUT ALL HER LIFE AND SHE DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHAT SHE DID WRONG !!!!

Do yall expect her to be like "oh okay I'll just go back to wanting love from everyone else but my sister" ????? How do you expect her to react??

Don't even get me started with "but she married a man she just met!!" Bs.

Attatchment issues are a real thing and Hans was the ONLY person who's shown her "love" after THIRTEEN YEARS. Ofcourse she's going to be attatched to him and would want to marry him. Also let's consider the fact that she was only 18. EIGHTEEN. With the word "teen". You expect her mind to be matured enough to "know better" ?? She only had paintings to talk to throughout the rest of her childhood. Not to mention she grieved all alone for her parents at the ripe age of FIFTEEN. If anything I'm proud of her for staying strong after all of that. Hell, she even reached out to her sister one last time.

"It's not that deep" it kinda is, for someone who relates to her. For ANYONE who relates to her and had the same experience and trauma as her. To anyone who has her as their role model. Like you can't blame someone who only had paintings to talk to, to not be attatched to someone who has given them the attention/affection they've been looking for for a long time. Also, the literal point is, Anna doesn't know anything about true love. Because She never had it! She doesn't know what it feels like because her own sister shut her out.

Also how was she even supposed to know he's a villain in the first place when he only gave her what she's been looking for for THIRTEEN years. (Spoiler alert: that's how manipulation works) Also, keep in mind she was Eighteen with a high emphasis on "teen". She never had any experience with love for a long time. She was a hopeless romantic looking for someone who wouldn't shut her out like her sister did. I feel like Anna gets more hate than Hans at this point.

Also, did ANYONE in real life not make stupid choices as a teen? No? Thought so. She wasn't even in her 20's yet and yall judging her for making a dumb choice she didn't even know was dumb because she was 18 and naive. She lived, she learned, she moved on and yall are still stuck on that one time where she married a man she just met just to have an excuse to hate on her.

I think Anna is rlly great. She worked hard for what she got in the end and she absolutely deserved that crown, because the whole point of the 2nd movie was that Elsa did not feel like she was meant to be queen.

"She shouldn't have pushed Elsa" Anna has been shut out for 13 years and had memories erased by the trolls. What do you want her to do?? Talk to her calmly after the ball when she was so desperate for answers on why she was shut out?? She has so many questions in her head that she couldn't take it anymore. Do you ever have this.. breaking point? Do yall even know a breaking point exists? Because I think that's what she had.

And while I understand Elsa's side, I'm explaining Anna's since you guys love to bring up the mistakes she did when her brain has not fully matured yet in the first movie. In the end, it was no one's fault and everything was just the result of both of their trauma's, but they learned to fix it at the end, didn't they?

Oh! Almost forgot the accident! Yeah! You have never been near a child in your life if you think that Anna shouldn't have gone too fast. Some kids CAN get carried away, and no, it can't be stopped by a simple "slow down!" Anna was being a child, and it was NO ONE'S fault. That's why it's called an "accident." Even Elsa said it was.

The point in this is that it was not Elsa nor Anna's faults. They were literal children when it happened, and their parents didn't know what to do because their kid has literal ice magic like.. none of her parents or grandparents even had anything like that so they did what they could to keep them both safe, but obviously that did not work. They're kinda flawed on the "conceal don't feel" part tho.

So yeah. Happy birthday Anna and I wish all of her haters a very warm pillow on both sides.

[twst-drabbles]

The same annon from the "MC shouldn't have magic" I absolutely LOVE when people talk about this! I love hearing people's rambles .

I also agree with all your points stated in the reply!

As for obey it hits close to home cause it's honestly one of my fav dating sims

(don't know many but it has good translation and doesn't have a paywall(GESMS) or adds)

But I also agree on the story telling 🥲. It's a good idea and plot but there's a part that could definitely use improvement (lesson 16 if yk yk).

SPOILER!!!!

for those who are in the later lessons it's weird for me how it never got stated that we learned magic(able to cast) in the original lessons(early ones). Like we always had magic and even though we didn't know anything we would've picked some stuff up like we've been there for almost a year. So we should've had at least have small weak magic 😞 but we only learned and got to cast spells later on late into the lessons once Solomon taught us.

Another thing that could've been improved.

END OF SPOILER!!

Also if you wanna know something about a lesson you can post about the lesson + chapter you want information on and I'll probably go to your inbox to tell you since i have 1-80

(not the locked ones you need 3 stars or the ones in hard mode)

Hope that helps :D

Drink water plz 🙏

Ah, lesson 16, the start of my frustrations. Funnily enough, I wouldn't be as irritated at that lesson if it weren't for the fact the MC isn't allowed to be angry. I was already annoyed with the fact the MC is easy to fluster when I'm 100% immune to flirtations and teasings, but lesson 16 kinda just, clicked into place that the writers had no intention of having the MC get some kind of backbone. So I just stopped playing the game. But also because all my UR's ended up being Belphegor and I was nooooot about that. I was considering re-downloading the game when those Diavolo cards were released but eh, I got into Arknights by then and I was sucked in.

And yes to the magic thing. If the intention was to always have the MC get magic, there should've been signs or indications as such. Odd reactions to the pacts, a sensitivity to the ingredients when making food or potions, perhaps even a heightened intuition for dealing with the creatures down under, or even just a sense of scale of the power sleeping in Diavolo's castle, but nope. And if the MC always had some small form of magic, it would've been a good idea for them to be clever with it when trying not to get murdered. Like, it's one of the things they're confident about, small magic spells that they use in creative ways, only to get that confidence tested and questioned with the events of lesson 16. Twas a missed opportunity, I say.

And honestly I forgot which lesson I left off on. It was so long ago. Would be nice to find a database to read at my own leisure.

[irresistiibles]

was that kathryn newton? oh no no, that was just tress, a canon character from the cosmere series. they are twenty one years old, use she/they, and are aware that they are not actually from washington dc. too bad they can’t stray from this city for long. 

how long has your character been here

i'm highkey saying she just showed up

what is your character’s job

i'm unsure. i think any shops that need someone to employ could be a cool plot for tress, but otherwise i'll probably have her wind up at a bakery or working on one of the boat tours in dc. also they're slowly taking some part time college classes

where has your character been pulled from in their fandom

right now i'm in the middle of the book, so in the middle of her journey to try and save charlie. she recently entered the crimson sea, and isn't sure how they got from there to here, but there's enough magic in tress' world that they have a variety of ideas for what might have happened.

has any magic affected your character

nope!

any other info

technically her given name is glorf. this isn't really important cause they exclusively go by tress but i had to share that knowledge.

okay so! gonna do a small lore dump without too many spoilers just need to know basis

the world building in this book is wild. tress is basically from a planet with twelve seas and twelve moons (i think it's twelve lol) and all of the moons release different spores

the spores make up the ocean, not water, hence why she lives on an emerald sea

when any form of water interacts with these spores they have some sort of effect, like growing into vines, or crystals, or shards, or exploding air. sounds cool, except like humans have water all over their body, and when i say the spores interact with water i mean any water

so essentially they're very dangerous. everyone lines their hours with silver or salt cause that kills the spores

suffice to say tress is going to be pretty stressed seeing their first rainfall here.

she's from an absolutely tiny island where no one is allowed to leave, and snuck onto a ship after finding out charlie, the boy she was in love with, was shipped off to an evil sorceress

she basically accidentally joins pirates, a bunch of shenanigans occur, and now she's here.

she basically became the person who worked with the spores on the ship and she's got some with her here in washington though very carefully sealed they're just for emergencies considering they're the main way she's capable of fighting i wanted her to have some

okay!! now one tress as a character

i understand her implicitly. she would rather risk her life than potentially inconvenience someone else and that is a vibe

she loves cups!!! collects cups!! is very excited to be in a new place with a lot of new cups!

pretty naive to the world, though open to learning.

she trusts so easily though it's pretty rough, and always wants to see the best in people. i wouldn't say that she's easy to take advantage of, because tress is pretty practical and smart, but she is the type to given seven thousand second chances because she wants people to be good so badly, and will find even the smallest good trait in people when she shouldn't

smart but that doesn't mean she regularly makes good decisions it just means she will rationalize stupid shit. and so stubborn!!!

very much an overthinker. a great listener but it takes tress a minute to figure out how to talk to other people.

plot ideas

collector buddies: anyone who collects anything please. tress would happily look out for their stuff in exchange for cups and i think it would be cute

in that same vein someone to go to different antique stores with her, again for cups

a roommate. tress is easy to live with and would offer to cook meals

maybe a more difficult character for her to befriend, although tress can handle someone having some bad traits she won't just let you be an asshole to her so we'd have to feel out the vibe

anyone to help her adjust to this world. their island was so small tress can't even fathom the idea of a place where you can't see the ocean no matter where you go. this is all going to be extremely weird to her. she's a good cook. will exchange baked goods for assistance.

as mentioned up above anyone who has some sort of shop and needs an employee this could be cool

school buddies she is going to need some help

a bad influence ig? not for like full crimes but this is someone who's barely even gotten drunk before someone make her have some fun

bisexual, down for a ship, probably on the wholesome side

[softgumi]

"the abyss twin or baal please 😀" 

TWs: yandere content, lumine favoritism sorry, spoilers for "We Will Be Reunited" quest, kidnapping, angst in Ei's part idk what happened lol 

Abyss! Lumine 

✧ she's definitely kind of stern with her darling, but this is solely because she loves them so much. Lumine is worried for their well-being, and often tries to coax them into hating the Gods as well. It's fine if they don't agree with her, she's completely okay with just keeping them locked up if that's what's necessary. Lumine is the type who exercises clear control over her darling without actually keeping them hostage, in this way she's worse than Aether. While the twins are very similar, she goes beyond controlling. 

✧ Lumine, while stern, has a very evident soft spot for her darling. She loves them with all of her heart and can't bear to leave them alone in a world she knows is utterly corrupted. She just wants them to be safe, so while she's very focused on her goals, she spends a great amount of time making sure that her darling is completely safe. She won't kidnap them, not exactly, but she makes sure that they know their place and that makes her a little scary sometimes. Lumine just really wants to take care of them! 

✧ this goes for both Abyss! Aether and Lumine, but her darling should absolutely stay away from Dain. Seeing her darling around him is guaranteed to get a nasty reaction from Lumine. That is her enemy, and while she wouldn't react any better if she saw her darling around an Archon, Dain is just something she can't accept. She gets angry, of course, but it's the silent type of anger. It's obvious and terrifying at the same time. Lumine would never hurt her darling, of course not, but they'll see a very nasty side of her afterwards. 

Abyss! Aether 

✧ on the other hand, Aether will absolutely kidnap his darling. I see Lumine being protective, but Aether more on the possessive side, so he literally will not tolerate his darling interacting with anyone. Period. Aether, though, is quite creepy. He watches his darling a lot, despite them always being with him. He keeps them locked up in a room, separated from the rest of the Abyss Order. While they're needed for his plans, he knows leaving his darling around them could be disastrous, and it would break Aether if they were to get injured due to his negligence. 

✧ he's so observant, too. Aether knows, quite literally, everything about his darling. He knows all of their hobbies, favorite foods, their dislikes, and even the people they knew before he captured them. He uses this information to his advantage quite a lot, too. Aether will use someone his darling cares about dearly in order to get them to behave, which is pretty messed up, and he knows that, but they shouldn't have been expecting him to be merciful in the first place. That being said, it'd probably be better if his darling were well-behaved. 

✧ I feel like interacting with Aether would be kind of awkward? Like, he constantly goes on about how corrupt Teyvat is, and how the Archons are hypocrites. It's either that, or he'll ramble on about how much he loves his darling, and that's enough to creep them out. He won't bore his darling with his own affairs, though. If they didn't know about the Abyss before he kidnapped them, it'll stay that way. He's sort of obsessed with keeping them naive and pure-minded. Whether or not they actually are doesn't matter, though. 

Raiden Shogun | Ei 

✧ you know how she went into isolation because everyone she cared about was dying? Yeah, her darling is coming with her. I feel like this could go for any Archon, but she's terrified of losing her darling, especially considering that they're human. It's terrifying for her, and so she makes it so they can't die. It's a cruel thing to do, because as long as they're stuck with her, they'll have to listen to her sad ramblings for the rest of eternity. It really is a pathetic card that they've been dealt, but Ei couldn't be happier. 

✧ despite creating the Shogun, I don't think Ei would leave her darling with her. The Shogun makes rash decisions, often resulting in death, so Ei would rather just keep her darling safe with her in Eternity. I can see her being borderline delusional, but it's just the result of Ei losing all of the people she cared so much about in the past. She feels like if she doesn't keep her darling locked away and immortal, they'll be killed. Her fears get the better of her, and Ei often just clings to her darling in hopes that they'll never leave. 

✧ she gets jealous over the dumbest things. Pets would be nice, Ei likes animals a lot! However, she can be rather childish in the way that she doesn't anything taking away the attention of her darling. She probably has a pet finch, though. The only person who's aloud near her darling is Yae, and that's only because Ei trusts her so much. Yae may or may not feed into Ei's yandere behavior, and I can just guess that her darling hates Yae because of her lack of action. It's mostly due to Yae just wanting her friend to finally be at peace and happy, though.

[barcaavengers]

Weakness || Bucky Barnes Imagine || Pt. 1

Note: I just had to jump in the Bucky Barnes train after watching TFATWS and with Sebastian looking like that it gave me much needed muse to get back into writing. So Here it is! I feel like this is fast paced but I'm already working on the second part. Let's see how this goes. This goes from Episode 3 and transitions to Episode 4 at the end so consider some spoilers? As always, let me know your thoughts and I'm open to ideas!

Disclaimer: Gif not mine.

The idea of going to see Zemo to get any leads wasn't something you were particularly fond of when Bucky decided to go in there by himself. Yes, you trusted the soldier, but it was Zemo who you didn't trust. He was responsible for the break up of the Avengers. If it wouldn't have been for those events you would have all been together to defeat Thanos.

Your combat skills were what gave you the spot in the Avengers. You didn't have a serum, or superpowers, no tech to give you advantage, you were just really good with guns, strategies and tactics, learned to think outside the box.

You know everything is about to go to hell when Bucky takes you and Sam to a warehouse filled with cars and starts talking about breaking Zemo out of jail.

"Do you remember what that man did to all of us? To you? To T'Chaka?" You ask between Bucky and Sam who were looking at each other, that was until the squeak of the warehouse house doors interrupted. The three of you turn to look as a shadow got closer until…

"What the hell?! You said it was hypothetical! What is he doing out, Barnes!?" You snarl and take two quick steps towards Zemo.

"We need him, Y/N!" Bucky blocks your path.

"You are going back to prison!" Sam shouts, Bucky putting his hand on Sam's chest.

"If I may…"

"No!" The three of you shout, looking at Zemo before turning to each other.

"It's the only way! We can't do this alone!" Bucky states. "When Steve refused to sign the Sokovia Accords, you two backed him. You broke the law and stuck your neck out for me… I'm asking you to do it again."

"This is different! It was to protect you from him but now you are asking us to work with his ass after everything?" You question. You would do it in a heart beat because he was asking for it, but the thought of being crossed by someone like Zemo was what had you on edge.

Sam only sighed and you knew, yet again, he would go through with Bucky's plan. "Okay. If we do this, you won't make a move without our permission…" Sam says and your eyes close as you let out a huff.

You are all walking down the bridge once you get escorted to the city of Madripoor, Low Town specifically. "You need to stay in character, no matter what happens" Zemo says.

"The assistant, shouldn't be that hard" you say with a roll of your eyes.

"Anyone would love such role, Y/N. I would prefer if your dislike didn't show when we get there" he says. "It is the only way to explain why we brought a lady along to such dangerous business."

"I'm perfectly capable of looking after myself, but thanks for your concern. That's sweet coming from someone like you" you say and you can spot Zemo smiling from your spot behind him.

"You okay?" Bucky asks once he falls behind you, looking at the surroundings and taking everything in.

"I'm not thrilled about this, but I guess we have no choice" you say as you look around, then your eyes fall on his frame. "What about you?"

"I don't know anymore…" he says before you all get inside the club.

Everyone fell silent when Bucky walked in, watching him, wondering if it really was the Winter Soldier. You have never been in the same space with Bucky in public, so the whispers and the looks had you feeling a kind of way, almost defensive, but you had to keep your role and give smiles to strangers while you walked with Zemo with your arms linked. You look around the place, leaning against the counter, hiding back a smirk as Sam drinks whatever the hell they just put in on his 'usual' drink.

"Zemo might not be welcomed here, but his assistant can stay as long as she wants" a man says into your ear and you are quick to move away.

"Excuse me?" You eye the man on your side.

"What's your name pretty face? I can get you a better job than being an assistant" the man reaches to push your hair away from your face, letting his hand linger on your shoulder and your body tenses. Sam meets your eyes and slowly shakes his head, knowing you were about to break character and beat the hell out of this man. Zemo noticed, but kept a neutral expression.

"If he doesn't take his hand off you…" You hear Bucky murmur under his breath. You gesture with your hand at him carefully to not give anything up, just raising two fingers towards him.

"Who says I want a better job?" You smirk and reach for your drink, sipping on it on one go.

Zemo turns to look at Bucky, and you have heard the words Winter Soldier in Romanian enough times to know them, so when Zemo speaks them and Bucky nods, your heart stops. He is swift in his moves and in a blur he is gripping and twisting the hand of the man that was bothering you. He looks back at you as he shoves the man away, your eyes meet for a moment before it all starts. Men from left and right start throwing themselves to him, like if they stood a chance against the Winter Soldier. Seeing him like this sent chills down your spine. Quick, agile, ruthless. His moves were so calculated, so life ending. The Winter Soldier might be gone but his skills and moves were there alright, you only hoped it was just that.

"It didn't take much for him to fall back into form" Zemo says on your side almost as if he read your thoughts.

"Make it stop, Zemo or I swear I'll jump in the fight…" you snarl.

"Stay in character or the whole place will be upon us" Zemo says and you let out a huff. "Your soldier will be fine. It's all part of the show…"

"He is not my soldier…" your eyes couldn't get away from Bucky, who now had a man pinned on the table and that's when you hear the clicking of a gun.

Things take a bad turn real quick. Sam got caught in his character thanks to a phone call. Selby got killed and now there was a bounty for her killers who were apparently the four of you, then Sharon saved your assess and took you to her place. You were getting ready for the party, something comfortable to fight should it be needed. Bucky leans against the bathroom frame while you curl your hair, "You know that will go away soon though, right? When you pick on the next fight."

"If it lasts me two minutes it would be worth it" you say with a smirk as you look at him through the mirror, placing the iron on the counter you turn to look at him, he offers you a weak smile. "Well you look handsome" you say as you eye him. The black suit looked so good on him, and it just made his blue eyes stand out.

"You look... beautiful" he blinks as he eyes you, his hands falling into his pockets.

"Well thank you" your cheeks flush. After a few seconds, your gaze softens when you feel he is...off. "Are you okay, Buck? I know that what you did back there..." you trail off.

"I'm fine. Its just… I'm still processing..." he shrugs.

"You shouldn't have gone through with the plan. We could've found another way…"

"We didn't have time to find another way. Zemo knew that way would give us the information we needed" he says.

"I still don't like that he is using you like this..." you say with a frown.

He remains silent for a moment, wetting his lips before speaking. "Y/N, I know we-"

"You two done?" Sam interrupts and James takes an annoyed intake of breath, your gaze drops.

"Yeah" James walks away without a look back and you chew on your lower lip.

"Did I interrupt something?" Sam says with a smug smile.

"Get out" You walk out of the bathroom and Sam throws his arm around you, laughing.

"You two were having a moment there, weren't you?" Sam teases as you walk, poking on your shoulder. "Listen, you gotta do this smoothly. He is all rusty. He hasn't had a date in like 70 years."

"He probably wants to be by himself to finish that notebook, and right now nothing can distract us" you frown.

"You distract each other already" Sam says between laughs. "One of you will be in danger and the other will run and save the other."

"That's what I mean. Zemo said it earlier, the Winter Soldier has a reputation. If he has to keep playing the part, I'll be trying to stop him even more than I already do. I can't blow off the mission because of whatever this is..."

"Alright, you got a point, but talk to him, alright? If you want, take him out of the party and work it out" Sam pats your back as you walk out to the living room area.

"Looking sharp, Y/N" Sharon says with a grin once you come out and you twirl with a laugh. "Enjoy the party. Stay out of trouble, I'll see what I can find."

"Shall we then?" Zemo asks, holding his arm out to you.

"Let's go" you link your arm with his, just to play along. After this time with Zemo you figured out you might as well enjoy yourself, there was still a long way ahead before getting rid of him again. He didn't seem so bad since he broke out, you still didn't trust him though.

Once at the party, you stick around with Zemo. Sam and Bucky are somewhere around the lounge surveying the place, you all still had a bounty on your heads anyway. Meanwhile you are with Zemo, who was making some moves that had you giggling and laughing. He took your hand and started going around you before letting go and you grin. "Should've known you were this fun I would've helped breaking you out" you tease over the music.

"Didn't had a chance" Zemo says and smiles as he claps while letting the music move him. He eyes something behind you before looking back at you. "Your soldier can't seem to stop looking at you" you want to turn around, but you decided against it.

"He is not my soldier…" you say. "He is just watching out for us. We have prices on our heads remember?" You tap your head as you say the words. "And you have him acting as our bodyguard."

"I know your hatred was fueled when I had him act in such way, and I do apologize for such plan but it was the only way" he says. "You would know if you understood how things realistically move" he says.

"Apology accepted" you say. Zemo takes your hand and twirls you, and you catch a glimpse of Bucky walking towards the two of you.

"I believe we have company" Zemo says into your ear. "You know where to find me" he says and walks out and into the crowd with his own, awkward dancing pace. You giggle at it before turning around and finding Bucky close.

His shoulders were tense under that black suit that made him look so good, and his scowl was too obvious. "Having fun with Zemo?" He asks, everyone around you was moving to the music, except him who only looked to where Zemo had disappeared to, his tongue poking in annoyance at his cheek.

"Just wanted to get to know him a bit more. Is not an everyday thing we hang with a Most Wanted prisoner" you say with a shrug. "Who you broke out of jail may I add."

"I didn't do anything" he says and his gaze averts from yours.

"For being one hundred and six you are an awful liar, Buck" you smirk, but he doesn't say anything. His hands are tucked in his pockets, eyeing everything but you. "Relax. Enjoy the music."

"This isn't my type of music" he says coldly and looks around the place once again.

"Fine…" you stop on your moves. Might as well take Sam's suggestion, plus you could see this scenario and the music was too much for him. "Come on, let's go back upstairs and talk" you hold your hand out for him and he looks at it, he hesitates before his glove covered hand wraps around yours and you lead the way.

"I told you, I'll be fine" he sighs as he sits down on the couch, you sit right beside him.

"Bullshit, Barnes" you say as you drop down. "When you were fighting those people…"

"It was just an act…I'm not a killer anymore..."

"I know, Buck" you reach to put your hand on his knee, which he eyes before looking at you. "But you didn't go to therapy to get over this only to be pulled again for a show. This isn't right."

"I'm okay, I promise…" he trails off. "I'm just getting used to all of this" his hand covers yours, sending electricity through your nerves.

"I promised Steve I would look out for you to not do anything stupid," you smile at him "I am not a super soldier or have any powers, but if I can help. I will do what I can…" you admit to him. His blue eyes look into yours and your heart stops it's beating for a second.

You hold his gaze and shift your position on the couch, your leg was already falling asleep since it was under you. "I-" he pauses and you can see his mind wondering, thinking, calculating. Sam was right, you could almost see the gears turning.

"Talk to me. I know you have something to say" you smirk.

"I guess that what I'm trying to say is, I am glad that you are with me in this mission even after everything-"

"Don't. Please…" you were sure he was going to bring up that one time where Sam, Steve and Natasha, as well as yourself, were attacked by him while trying to get a hold of Hydra. It was the first time you had seen him, you didn't know him, but you feared him. You are a mere human and he is a super soldier, the most dangerous soldier for the past years. He had tried to kill you back then one way or another, guns, knives, grenades, but somehow you survived.

Then you met him when Cap and Sam went after him, seeing him act like a normal person triggered something in you. How could someone like him turn into someone so dangerous? The time you spent watching after him, and fighting alongside the team had warmed your heart towards him to the point you admitted to yourself you caught feelings for him. How could you not? You were the only person to go to Wakanda to see him after he was freed, and it will be an understatement that you cried your eyes out when he told you the words. That was when the two of you started having a connection.

"You okay?" His voice echoes and you realize you had zoned out.

"Yeah. Sorry I was just thinking of…" he eyes you curiously, those steel blue eyes had you going weak. You inch closer and you feel him move, his head siding in a way that all you had to do was… "I'm so sorry for this, Buck-"

"What are you apolog-" and your lips muffle his words when you press them against his. You hated this. Losing your control the second you are alone with him. This wasn't right, but it felt unbelievably nice. His lips don't move, so to save yourself more embarrassment you pull away and duck your head to avoid his gaze, hoping that your hair is covering the redness of your cheeks.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done that…" you pull your hand away from under his, daring to look up at him. "We should go back to the-"

This time, he interrupts you. His flesh hand moving in a blur to the back of your head to bring you in for another kiss. His lips were rough on yours even when they parted slowly, but what did you expect? For him to be the womanizer Steve once told you he was? That now that he was free he would be kissing any girl? You let out a sigh of relief through your nostrils before pulling away.

"Did I do something wrong?" His eyes were soft with worry as he tried to meet yours.

"No. Gosh no" you bite your lip. "Don't apologize...I just lost myself there…" you giggle and he smiles weakly. You move forward again but stop, looking into his hues for approval before you lean in again slowly and his lips capture yours. He dares to part his lips and you tilt your head slightly, so does his, deepening the kiss only slightly.

"Y/N? Are you- Sweet Jesus!" Sam voices echoes through your ears and Bucky quickly pushes you away lightly, but enough to have you away from him.

"Sam. I-" You try to explain.

"Nuh-uh. I saw enough to know what was going on."

"Any leads?" Bucky asks, trying to divert the attention, standing up now.

"Sharon found him" Sam says. "Let's go, and no PDA while I'm around, okay?"

"When all of this is over-" Bucky starts as you two walk down the containers, Sam, Sharon and Zemo a few feet ahead.

"I shouldn't have done that" you insist. "My timing was off.."

"You make it sound like it was wrong when it wasn't" he pulls out his gun and so do you.

"It was" you nod your head as you walk. He reaches for your hand, looks at the group in front of you before he pulls you to the side behind a container, your body between the two.

"I have wanted what happened more than you know" he is soft in his words and his eyes divert to your lips for a moment. "I just...I have a past, Y/N..."

"A past you are free from now, Bucky" you point out. "You are not The Winter Soldier anymore. You have grown from that ever since Wakanda…" you assure him. "I'm not even asking you to accept it to start something because I know its way too soon-"

"You don't understand" he slowly backs away from you.

"You don't trust yourself entirely yet, do you?" His eyes avoiding your gaze made you frown. "I knew that this would have consequences. I'm going to talk to Zemo."

"Y/N, wait" he catches your arm as you turn and he brings you close. "We can't trust Zemo. You know that…" he says. "I am not sure how to explain it, but-"

That's when it hit you. "You don't want him to know we are each other's weakness…" you voice and his head nods slowly as he swallows.

"That's why we need to sort this out, but later, not during this…"

"Y/N?" Sam calls out and you frown.

"On it!" You whisper shout back.

"Be careful. I'll go in with Sam…You stay with Sharon…" he says and your head nods.

*****

"Walker I swear if you don't shut up I'll make you swallow that shield" your arms were crossed, leaning against the wall behind Bucky who was guarding the stairs. Zemo was cuffed, Sam was inside talking with Karli, Walker and Hoskins had found their way to you and now were here.

"Easy there. I'm just worried about your partner being in there by himself" he says and you notice the glare the Sargeant gives him.

"You have been messing this whole operation the moment you got here" you spat.

"Aren't you worried about Sam back there?"

"He can handle himself. He is doing what is right, unlike others" you eye him up and down and his whole face darkens, taking a step forward and you take a defiant one as well.

"Think carefully what you will do next, Walker" Bucky puts his hand on his chest.

"Let him. I can kick his ass and take that shield off his hands in a heartbeat…" you hiss.

"This is all easy for you, isn't it? All that serum rushin' through your veins. You let your partner in there with a Super Soldier, that blood will be on your hands if things get dirty in there…" Walker says to Bucky. How dare he!?

For a moment, you ponder on his words and you can't stand the thought of Sam being in there getting beaten by Super Soldiers while Walker could be right. You didn't want him to be. What if they took him? What if…?

"Buck…" you put your hand on his bicep and he looks at you, knowing very well what you wanted to do.

Of course, Walker wasn't very good with entrances since he literally waltzed in calling Karli and saying she was under arrest. Super Soldiers showed up everywhere and your eyes widened. Karli pushes Walker and then storms off running.

"Karli!" You call and look at Sam.

"Go! We got this!"

Your head nods, eyes shift to look at Bucky who was fighting a Super Soldier off before you storm to the direction Karli headed to. You see her walking down the corridor, not too far from you. "Karli, wait! This is not what it looks like!" Karli says and she stops in her tracks, looking back at you.

"It is exactly what it looks like! You are working for Captain America!"

"What? No! We hate the guy!" You admit bluntly, honesty can get you places after all, and at least she stopped. "We just want to work this out. There has to be a better way to fight for what you want, Karli…" you say and get closer.

"Yeah. There is...But first, you will help us deliver a message before we trust you again" your head tilts to the side curiously when you feel arms around you and you feel a pinch on your neck. Your eyelids feel heavy all of a sudden until you can't hold them open any longer.

-Bucky's POV-

After fighting some of the Flag Smashers off he meets with Sam, Walker and Hoskins in the middle of the building.

"We lost them" Hoskins says as he looked around.

"You made us loose them! I had everything under control until you stepped in!" Sam complained.

"Where is Y/N?" Bucky asks as he looks around.

"She went after Karli. I haven't seen her since..." Sam says, his phone goes off and Bucky is quick to move close to him as he opens the message. "They got Y/N…" Sam's brown eyes shift to look at Bucky who was clenching his jaw yet his eyes showed how worried he was, and mad for letting you go after Karli alone.

"That's it." Bucky turns on his heels and started walking the other direction.

"Bucky!" Sam calls but it didn't get the man's attention. "Bucky!"

[iamanartichoke]

Episode 5 - the negative (critical)

(Under the cut, for length and spoilers.)

So let's just get right into it.

- Loki's characterization. I have mixed feelings about it that I will do my best to articulate. Basically I've come to accept that this version of Loki is a new version and - especially with the show establishing that each Loki is so different - a new character. And he's similar enough to the previous Loki for me to be okay with this; that is, by considering him a variant and less reflective of the 2011-2013 Loki (who remains my favorite) but still more or less the same, the ooc-ness of it stings less.

That said, I don't feel very confident in my interpretation on this. On one level it's a fandom thing - just being cognizant of the divide between the people who insist that Loki is so ic, has never been more ic, totally accurate, etc, and the people who disagree with that, to put it mildly. I sort of doubt my own perception on his characterization when there are so many posts that are like, "he's so ic" and "well, it makes sense for him if you consider ..." - but, ultimately, that just goes back into my previous issue, which was that I shouldn't have to consider so much in order for the characterization to make sense.

So there's that, but the fandom divide is indicative of a larger issue, and that's the cognitive dissonance between what the showrunners say is 2012 Loki, and what the narrative depicts as 2012 Loki. Strictly speaking for myself, the two are not the same. I want to feel like the writers have intentionally made Loki just ooc enough to develop into his own person over the course of the series, but that doesn't seem to be the case. I was reading an article or interview or something w/ Kate Herron last night and in it, she was talking about how she and Tom worked hard on Loki's characterization. This quote in particular really threw me -

"“No one knows Loki better than Tom. I think for me, it was really just about having his back. We’d chat while we filmed that first episode a lot about making sure that he was ‘ Avengers’ Loki, and bringing that presence,” Herron says. “We actually would talk a lot about scenes from ‘The Avengers’  in terms of where [Loki] is emotionally, because he was only there hours before. I think that’s generally how we both kind of kept in check with each other and made sure it was the Loki from 2012.”

(Source.)

... I mean. On the one hand, I like that this implies that she took Tom's feelings and ideas into serious consideration - she clearly has a lot of respect for how well Tom knows the character - but on the other hand, it is kind of mind boggling to think that they acknowledged and referenced Avengers and still ended up with something so different?

I feel that Avengers Loki has less and less in common with show Loki as the series progresses (which is not bad, in that Loki's arc takes him away from being the villain, so it makes sense that he wouldn't feel like that previous version), but even in the first episode, I had a hard time reconciling that Loki with the one who was posturing, flailing, making weird jokes, and just generally spending the first half of the episode being rather cringe.

I mean -

^^ I haven't seen this Loki at all, even in show Loki's more somber moments. (I wrote a whole long thing about the mind-influence factor, but I don't think it's actually super relevant.) These gifs are indicative of Loki's overall demeanor in Avengers, a demeanor that show Loki has been lacking since the beginning.

And, certainly, Loki being the protagonist here is going to alter him, that's inevitable - the narrative framing of protagonist vs. supporting character in addition to "hero" vs. villain is going to give us a different perspective of the character. We're going to get to know him a lot better than we were able to before, and the role he's in now allows us to see more openness, more awkwardness, more of (what may or may not be, I haven't decided) the real Loki underneath the polished facade he puts on for everyone else.

So that's fine, but I guess what I'm getting at here is, I've come to accept and like Loki's characterization in this series, and in this episode he felt more Loki-like, aside from a few fumbles, but I'm not sure if this is how I'm supposed to be interpreting it. And, by extension, that makes me feel both critical of the portrayal as well as insecure in my interpretation. I think that the narrative needs to be clearer on how we're meant to view this Loki - like, is he the same or not? And if he is the same, why do so many of us feel like he's ooc? (Hint: it's not bc we made the "ic" version up.) And if he's not the same, why hasn't the narrative confirmed that as opposed to just hinting at it?

So, yknow. Much feels, very confuse, as far as all that is concerned.

- I did feel like Loki was a little more active in the plot in this episode, especially once he and Sylvie realized that the enchantment would only work if they did it together. (So, like, the end of the episode.) I mostly took issue with Loki's plan being bad, and everyone acting like it was inherently bad bc Loki came up with it. "You agreed to this terrible plan?" "*defensive muttering*" etc. And with his plan being so bad, it ended up making Sylvie's look so much better, so I wasn't thrilled. That said, again, having them do the enchantment together was something of a balm on that.

- I've got really mixed feelings on how Loki's magic was addressed. In my positive post, I acknowledged that I see what the narrative is doing and can live with it, but it is a retcon and not a particularly good one, either. (Unless it's not a retcon and they're just trying to be consistent with/explain Loki's relative lack of magic usage in the movies - also a possibility.)

I guess it feels like Loki's magic, when he has access to it, consists mostly of illusions and trickery. He can conjure up things (it's not clear if he conjures them from nothing, or if he pulls things - like the blanket - from his pocket dimension; but, if it's the latter, again, why didn't he put the tempad in there back in episode 3 and if it's the former why couldn't he just conjure himself and Sylvie some tickets asdhjdhsa), and he can cast illusions and change his appearance, and that seems to be all. The stronger magic he's displayed - teleportation, telekinesis, shooting green magic from his hands at enemies - has the feel of being magic that he's not used to using often.

And if it's because he's insecure in his abilities, or doesn't realize the full scope of them, or both, it contradicts the backstory of Loki having been practicing magic for his entire life (a thousand years!) and the level of skill he canonically is supposed to have. It just rings false to me. Unless you consider that, growing up in Asgard's warrior culture where male magicians were mocked rather than admired, Loki got used to hiding his full abilities, or suppressing them, or relying on them only as a last resort - but, there's that "well if you consider ...." again.

- Old Loki's story of faking his death. Okay. Like I mentioned in my other post, I like the acknowledgement that the death was terrible and the opening for Loki to return to the main timeline, but I hate that it comes by undermining Loki's legitimate deaths and instead falling back on the (incorrect) trope of "Loki fakes his death all the time lol."

The explanation doesn't make much sense, either, because again, Loki's illusions have never been solid, so you're asking us to believe that in the time between Ragnarok and IW, Loki not only learned how to solidify his illusions but to do it so well that it fooled Thanos into thinking he'd killed the real Loki?

BUT, all fairness to the show here, it wasn't like they had great material to work with in the first place. The IW scene was so nonsensical that, I mean, I guess they did the best they could in coming up with an explanation that would fit with that trash fire and still seem somewhat plausible?

I don't believe that Loki would let Thor believe he was dead for centuries (as implied by his old age). Nor do I buy that Loki getting lonely and coming out of isolation would trigger a nexus event (although it does fit with the timeline's insistence that Loki must always be alone). I don't think he would have gone into isolation in the first place, though; I think he may have laid low for awhile but, especially after Thanos was defeated, he'd have popped back up again somewhere along the line.

However, they could have kept Old Loki's story as solitary and vague as possible to leave themselves options to write Loki back into the main timeline without contradicting anything.

Overall, I think I feel more positive than negative about Old Loki's story, or at least I'm willing to suspend my disbelief in order to accept it if it means it undoes Prime!Loki's death. (Prime!Loki = Old Loki?? Hmmmm.) But it's definitely kind of ehhhh.

- Loki saying that he betrayed his father, his brother, and everyone who loved him. HOO BOY. Like, holy shit, talk about getting the story wrong.

First of all, when he says "betrayed [his] father," is he referring to Odin or to Laufey? If it's the latter, he definitely betrayed Laufey but Laufey definitely did not love him, so it's moot, and if it's the former, I have no idea how he betrayed Odin, unless they're implying that Loki's actions in Thor 2011 were a betrayal, in which case fuck you bc that's not what happened, like, at all.

Literally thousands of words of meta have gone over this, again and again and again - he was trying to prove himself to Odin, he was defending Asgard, he was acting out of all kinds of complicated emotions which, while not making his actions okay, provide a context that's more than just 'lol Loki is a betrayer.' My point is, Loki had a lot of Reasons but betrayal wasn't one of them.

As for Thor, it's a little more gray; betrayal could be one word for everything that went wrong between them, but certainly not the only word, and I'm not sure it's entirely accurate.

I wish that when Loki had said "I know why I did it," he would have elaborated, bc I'd like to hear why he did it, but at the same time, I wouldn't trust this narrative not to come up with some bullshit reason so it's probably better that he left it at that.

And that leads me to my main criticism about it - as annoying as it is to have his actions framed as betrayal, the larger issue I have is that either the writing is being lazy by oversimplifying Loki's motives, or it's being deliberately misleading in order to retcon the character, or the writers genuinely believe that's what happened, which implies a misunderstanding of Loki's character kinda from the get-go - at least on what drives his villainy and what fuels his anger, which are pretty significant things. I don't like any of these options, so whichever way you look at it, it's a fail. And it's frustrating bc I think the show can do better.

- The pacing. It still feels like a lot is happening right now, which is obviously good, but I feel like the narrative space in earlier episodes could have been used better so that the climb up towards the climax would feel smoother, and the climax would feel more earned.

I do still think, though, that ultimately six episodes just wasn't enough to contain the story and the character developments. In a way, it almost feels like they're skimming the surface in order to avoid going too deep with anything, possibly bc they realize they don't have time to get that deep or to accomplish meaningful character arcs. This way, we get surface-level arcs, but we do get arcs, so there's that.

So, yeah. There were some significant things about this episode that I didn't like, but they didn't upset me nearly as much as the "narcissism" remarks from episode 4, and I think between liking more than disliking this episode, combined with the romance not being as bad (so far) as I feared, and I think I feel better approaching episode 6. I can't believe there's only one episode left; I can't believe this has already been going on for five weeks (this being all the feels, the anxiety, the fandom wank, the anticipation, etc, like, I'm going to need drinks when this is all over).

[rpg-elf-girl]

Shadows House

I have a lot of thoughts surrounding this particular show, both good & bad.

Allow me to give a quick summary for anyone who hasn't seen/read it!

Shadows House is about 'a faceless family of nobles who all live within this giant manor, the Shadows House.

When a Shadow comes of age they receive a 'Living Doll' to both serve as their face and to clean the soot they emit from their bodies.

The most important rule of the living dolls is "don't fret over trivial matters"

A task which is difficult for the ever curious doll Emiliko.

Watch this tale unfold as Emiliko & her mistress Kate navigate this ever mysterious Manor together.'

For a fan of slow burn thrillers, horror, slice of life, supernatural & mystery series' this has been an absolute blast!

It's not quite the combination of genres you'd expect from a show, but it works really well here!

In fact I was so into the anime that this is actually the first show where I broke down and read the manga!

Unfortunately there's no official English release, but at least there are some people translating the series!

As much as I'd like to go on about the manga, this post is meant to be more so about the anime so I'll (try to) leave it at that.

Though i feel obligated to warn anime onlys I'll likely refer the manga a lot in a spoiler section latter in this post I'll try to be vague but I can't guarantee anything. For anyone worried about that I'll lable it do you can read on until then.

Everything from the animation to the music was amazing & completely fit the mood of the story! I remember a couple scenes where I actually teared up because of this!

The Ending theme is an absolute banger! I've listened to that on repeat ever since I first heard it! And the Opening is also great! It's cool for it to be an instrumental, stuff like that is pretty rare! I also heard the song in the op as a motif in the music throughout the show! It really sets the right mood in each scene it's in! It's amazing for getting into each episode!

In terms of adaptation almost everything from the beginning to the end of the Debut arc was done amazingly well!

Even with the stuff they cut it still holds true to the spirit of its source.

The main important part that was cut is something that could easily be introduced latter if they decide to go for a second season, so I'm not too mad about that.

However! Everything after the debut is a bit of a different story.

There was a lot I liked about the last couple episodes but there were some parts that were immersion breaking for me.

I've been being vague up until this point l, but I'm planning on going into spoiler territory for both the anime and manga after this. So I'll make a quick spoiler free summary of my thoughts before moving onto that.

I really really loved this show but in my opinion the last 3 episodes were the weakest of them all. They went anime only for the ending. I don't mind that on it's own, but it was rushed and the writing was sloppy at times.

Now I'm not telling you to not watch the show! Most of It's really really good, and I can still see people enjoying the parts I'm talking about if they want to give the anime a try. Overall I've fallen in love with this series and I could never recommend it enough.

If what I'm saying is giving you bad vibes the manga is available and doesn't have the issues I've mentioned. You can look for a translation online, it didn't take me long to find one so don't worry too much about that.

Also! if you're an anime only who's finished the series and want to know where to pick up the Manga I'd recommend at least skiming through the beginning. I know it might not be what you're looking for but there were a bunch of small scenes that either got cut or were merged for adaptation purposes that I think are super cute & give more context to different aspects of the setting. However! Pay close attention during the "night watchers part" something important got cut .

~~~Now for spoilers!!!!~~~

I don't want to make it sound like I'm some manga purist who hates the very thought of the slightest change from the source. I'm anime only for a lot of different shows and I've always despised it when that type of manga reader reared it's ugly head.

While I'll admit some changes did bother me I won't make a fuss about the smaller stuff.

With that said!

I hinted earlier in this post that I didn't have a big problem with Robe-same being cut. That was because without them there it does make for a more complete story if they only get one season to work with.

If there is another season they can easily be introduced latter on. Like maybe Emiliko & Shaun can meet them when the Debutant class reunion is going on before they talk on the roof (or right after that) I actually think that would be the perfect time to introduce them (other than the time they were supposed to appear, but I digress)

Louise teaming up & being friendly with Kate can be explained with some dialogue changes at the first Debutant Class Reunion. Louise can say she was just trying to show off or that she just wanted to get back at Edward and that she isn't interested in helping Kate with her problems. Things can then go on as they did in the manga.

Kates being reckless & telling everything to John can be explained by her being extremely panicked when Emiliko went missing, as long as there are some lines of dialogue adressing this it's fine. Though I do wish she tried to keep some stuff a secret but couldn't because Shaun tries to interfer because he's still brainwashed, or something along those lines. It felt a bit weird after she just told Emiliko to keep that stuff between them. Still that could be explained by how panicked she was.

There are other things, but I don't want to drag the post on too long. Most of the issues can be fixed with little changes here & there.

I never had a problem with the idea of them going in an anime only direction. I just want to have a good time with the show.

Unfortunately I can't 100% vouche for the direction the show went in. There were elements that I can't excuse, even viewing it as it's own entity instead of an adaptation.

My main complaint with it is how they handled the brainwashing of Ricky & Lou. They didn't say a word when the Debutants were talking badly about Edward & even went along with a plan to go against him. It makes absolutely no sense!

Shaun freaked out when John only suggested that he didn't have to be loyal to the house. These guys were flat out rebelling against an adult! It felt like Ricky & Lou didn't have a purpose & were just there to be there.

The whole point of the coffee is to influence shadows against doing stuff like this. It makes the coffee seem pointless and the adults seem dumb for relying on it to control the kids.

I haven't even brought up the fact that both of their brainwashings were broken by something as simple as a few kind words. It straight up contradicts the rules established by both the Anime and Manga.

This becomes very apparent when you consider all the trouble John & Kate went through to free Shaun & Emiliko.

This was my biggest complaint, but I have some other issues as well.

The next big one is how they handled Edward.

1. Why on earth would he even consider kidnapping Emiliko when he had complete control of the childrens wing? Before this point he was depicted as being a lot more crafty than this. He could easily have Kate monitored or something.

2. Why didn't he use his powers to stop them like what he did to Maryrose & Rosemary when they fought back being taken to the adults wing? He's already shown off his power at this point, why not?

3. Why did he reveal his soot powers at all!? Especially while using his face in front of the kids! The whole unification thing is one of the biggest secrets of the house for good reason! There's no way he wouldn't get in huge trouble for exposing it to children!

Here are some other related questions.

Why didn't Kate, Emiliko, & John react to Edward using soot powers? They shouldn't know about unification yet so why didn't they act shocked, or say anything about it?

Is Edward being banished even an option in the Shadows House? Wouldn't the third floor lords just dispose of him rather than risk letting him leave?

How did John even get a veiled dolls outfit? Louise had to use her powers to get Kate one & she left a long time ago.

I can't think of much else at the moment, but I think you get my point.

Please don't take this as me saying that I hate the show because of these episodes. Even if I consider them the weakest of the series I still found a lot of parts to be very enjoyable!

Like I thought it was adorable When Edward was attempting to interrogate Emiliko & she kept being her sunshine self pretending to eat & falling asleep.

Barbara getting to tell off Edward for breaking the rules was great!

I loved seeing Shaun hatch the plan to get Kate into the adults wing to save Emiliko.

Seeing John (attempt to) sneak around the adults wing had me rolling!

The ending scene of Shaun, Ricky, & Lou singing gave me the chills.

(Though I wonder how they'd handle Shaun & Emiliko being brainwashed again since they already used the scenes where they're freed)

Kate & Emilico being propelled by John back to the children's wing was absolutely amazing! I found Shaun & Ricky running over to catch them to be super sweet! (Not to mention the way that scene was animated was absolutely gorgeous!)

Getting hints to what was supposed to come after the debut was nice, at least the groundwork is there in case this gets a season 2!

To (try to) wrap this all up while there were a lot of things I loved and disliked about this show I still had a really fun time watching it!

I kinda hope there's a season two just to see if they can tidy up the mess that the last few episodes created.

Regardless of whether that happens or not I came out of this with a series I absolutely adore.

Heck I could make a whole other post about the manga. (Hopefully one that's less ranty)

Anyway! I won't take any more of your time.

I hope you all have a wonderful day/night! And I hope to see you in my next post!

(Sorry if this one was a bit of a mess!)

[itsclydebitches]

I adore talking about this with you, it's so cool to be able to agree, everything I've read is just excusing yen lmao.

And with "geralt would rather do and say things Yen wants to avoid pissing her off" LIKE YEAHH I guess I annoyed yen with my answers and she teleported Geralt out of the tower thing, and then threatened to do it again like??? Like he pissed her off so she has fuck all care about him, was over water thank god but like girl??? omg and her refusing to tell the wticher bros what she was planning on doing to Uma, like I get that they would be hesistent but I mean it's cause it's cruel and painful and they have that trauma around that. She just expects everyone to do what she asks when she asks no questions. (Lambert's "I'm not geralt" when he and Yen are kinda arguring, bb red flags)

I just assumed she didn't believe him cause if she did whats her excuse for behaving how she is lmao??? Like you believe he has amnesia and you still blame HIM over the person who maniplated him KAY.

And goodddd that fucking scene when Triss and Yen see Ciri in Kaer Morhen is genuinely the worst, Triss and Yen see their sis/daughter (not gonna get into how weird I find it that Triss considers Ciri her sister and Geralt is Ciris father and she still wants to fuck him, uncomfy) for the first time in forever, she's alive and well and while Triss is hugging Ciri, Yen kisses Geralt and Triss throws a glare at her. I hated that scene so damn much, it's stupid and shouldn't have been there. (aso I get emotions and all but Yen kissing Geralt is so bitchy, idk even full of gratitude and emotion I wouldn't kiss the man who just dumped me lol, especially not in front of a situation like Triss)

I'm still mad about the women, I really wanted to like them fuck meeee

YOU GOT TO THE PART. Oh thank god, anon, I've wanted to talk about this since we started these conversations lol

Okay, let's set the scene, shall we? You arrive to find that, with our playthroughs anyway, your ex has barged into your home. I say "barged in" because although we (Geralt) know that Yen's help is necessary and she'll be tagging along, the other witchers living there are given no prior warning and, according to Vesemir, Yen teleported in without so much as a "Hello." She then immediately starts ordering everyone around like her servants, failing to explain the situation beyond there being a curse that they have to help with. No, this isn't negotiable. She (still being an ex) takes your old room for herself, which just happens to be the biggest in the keep, and proceeds to toss a bed out the window. It's only later that Vesemir recalls that Triss used to use it, so prior to that everyone apparently just accepted that Yen was destroying their stuff for no understandable reason. Classic Yen. You go upstairs to find her cursing a blue streak at her failed experiment and when you try to lighten the mood, she snaps at you. If you're of the opinion that Yen's every order must be obeyed, this is when you're supposed to drop the conversation entirely, because she said to. Except, funnily enough, you'd like to know why she's up here being The Worst Guest Ever and destroying your property. She tries to justify this by saying that destroying a bed is better than how she could be dealing with her anger over Triss. Be grateful and all that. Except, it's not really about Triss, is it? The line is "You shagged my friend. For upwards of a year. I don't know what your witcher's code says on the matter, but ordinary folk would consider it obscene, base, vile." The blame is not on the woman who knowingly manipulated Geralt into having sex with her while he was vulnerable, it's on Geralt himself! He is the "obscene, base, vile" person for... daring to have amnesia? And when you point that out - "Yen... told you already. I lost my memory" - she yells that she's "lost [her] patience" and teleports you into a lake! This is, apparently, how she really wants to deal with her anger. Not by destroying beds, but by attacking you for things outside of your control. And I do consider it an attack. Yen is meant to be insanely powerful, she is leveraging her magic as a weapon here, particularly when Geralt has spent the whole game commenting on how much he hates portals. Yen knows this. Not just because he says so in her presence, but because she frequently reads his mind, something else he's expressed discomfort with. She's not just demonstrating her power (controlling) and sending him away when he makes a point she doesn't want to acknowledge (immature), she chooses the one thing she knows makes Geralt uncomfortable, perhaps even scared. Then when you've swum your way back to shore and returned to, despite all this, begin her list of chores, she makes a dry comment about how next time she just might drop you high enough for the fall to be fatal. With the next time implied to be, you know, the next time you disagree with her. The next time you dare to do anything other than agree with her every belief and jump at her every command.

The fandom interpretation of all this: "Lol Geralt getting yeeted is so funny. And their banter is just 😍"

Me:

You mentioned red flags and yeah like that ENTIRE SCENE is a crimson banner for me. I mean, by all means, love the fictional ships that are super messed up (I often do), but it astounds me how many fans honestly think this is just a cute interaction with absolutely no problems attached. Nothing to question here, folks. I've mentioned before, but last I discussed this in depth the asker wanted to know if I'd been an asshole to Yen and... that's it. That's the perspective. Any disagreement with her, any pushback, anything that's not complete, blind obedience is something she will not permit AND something most fans take as a given. If you're not doing what Yen tells you to, you're automatically the asshole, and if you're the asshole, you automatically deserve any punishment she chooses to dish out.

Comic spoilers coming up if you want to skip, but this is made abundantly clear in "Curse of Crows." Yen and Geralt are at their best in the moment below, enjoying one another's company on a nice day. Yen asks if Geralt wants to swim and he says nah, he'd rather watch her. She appears to like that idea and, indeed, swims naked while Geralt admires from the shore.

Actually cute right? I really liked this moment! They're cuddled up together and exchanging smiles. It's a rare moment of peace where I can believe that they truly care for one another, outside of passionate sex and not wanting the other dead. Finally, something beyond that incredibly low bar.

...except Yen starts flirting with a young man who shows up, invites him to travel with them, all while refusing to explain why she's interested in his company. The sudden third wheel is clearly bothering Geralt, but Yen continues to ignore his questioning. The answer she finally gives later that night?

She did it purely to mess with Geralt! It's his "just desserts" for "refusing to swim with [her]." She is "not one to be refused - I thought you needed reminding" by giving him "a flick on the nose." When I say that Yen treats Geralt like a dog I mean she literally treats him like a dog. He's a servant who must jump at her every command and if he doesn't, he'll punished for disobedience. He might not even know why he's being punished for a long stretch because Yen enjoys making him think she's a normal person capable of accepting that he doesn't feel like swimming right now - insert the Kaer Morhen scene where she wants to go have sex upstairs, but Geralt wants to catch up with the brothers he hasn't seen in an age here - only to reveal that actually she's made their formerly nice outing uncomfortable because he needs to be put in his place. All of which is followed by, "So... willing to join me now?" The message is very clear! Geralt had better get his ass in that tub unless he wants to be punished some more. Whether he wants a bath right now or not is inconsequential.

This is also the run where she scares the women Geralt was with, despite them being separated right now. Why? "I could."

Claims that Geralt is allowed to return to his companions (who he actually waves away) only for him to realize she's cast a spell to burn him with the water. Yen loves pretending she's okay with things only to punish Geralt for them later - sometimes with physical punishments. And what would have happened if the women had actually joined him again? Do witchers weather hot water better than the average courtesan? Who knows, but Yen clearly doesn't care who might get hurt.

Just like her time in Skellige and at Kaer Morhen, she refuses to explain what's going on. She just expects people to obey her, so-called loved ones included. Geralt was to get her cider, and arrive before her bath went cold, not question what they're doing on this dangerous hunt. He's a servant.

And my favorite, petty moment: transforming her awful inn food into a lavish meal without offering to do the same for either Geralt or Ciri.

"But, Clyde, that's just the comics. They're not really canon." Nah, questions of canon aside, this is 100% Yen's characterization. She's prideful. Immature. Beyond controlling. And punishes anyone who dares to tell her "No." Fans are always pointing out that she's meant to be horrible, she could have been a villain in another life, like any of that explains why I'm supposed to root for this relationship or enjoy her existence outside of being a complex character. Yen is interesting, but she's interesting in a "I can't wait to see her get her own just desserts" way. Not "Wooo now I get to watch this story ignore her behavior again to push a True Love narrative."

She punished Geralt frequently during their first meeting, she punishes him whenever they get together, and, I think, she punished him during the reunion with Ciri. Given our playthroughs, do we really think that after breaking up with her and all this fury over Triss - an anger so deep she destroyed the bed and attacked Geralt - she's just overcome with such joy that she forgets they're not together anymore and forgets the anger she's been nurturing for years? Yen doesn't forget. She's staring at Ciri during that moment, right where Triss is currently running towards them, and then after a considering look at Geralt pulls him in for that kiss. That was calculated. She did that to make a claim she no longer had. To punish them both: make Triss uncomfortable by playing at the "perfect" family reunion; make Geralt uncomfortable by kissing him when she knows he doesn't feel the same way. But of course, the popular reading is that she just loves him so much she couldn't help herself. Riiight.

It's just all SO BAD. (Including, as you say, the ickiness of having Triss lusting after Geralt and referring to Ciri as "little sis.") I love a lot of the women in Witcher - Cerys is a fave, Ciri, Saskia, Philippa, Keira, etc. - but the two I'm supposedly meant to fall in love with are just the worst lol.

Basically:

Half the fandom: TEAM TRISS 🤬

The other half: TEAM YEN🤬

Me: TEAM REGIS 😭

[mira--mira]

3 things:

the first, Le gasp. Did Madara gave Hashirama the necklace that Tsunade gave to Naruto? That's always been a headcanon of mine so it'd be super cool if that was the case for OoT.

the 2nd: I now have a mental image of Gai running laps around Konoha with Lee & Hashimada bellowing about youth, like he does. Ppl just assuming that they're his Genin team. Cue either Neji, Tenten or Kakashi hearing about it and going over to check what's happening.

Kakashi will gaze upon the matching jumpsuits and give up on life

Neji and Tenten will be offended that they've been replaced.

The 3rd: Hashirama learns of Kakashi's (or well anyones) distaste for the jumpsuits and innocently suggest that when he becomes Hokage he'll implement them as the official Shinobi uniform. Legwarmers and all.

Now that I think about it, the Gai's outfit it literally Kakashi's except green and w/ legwarmers instead of bandages. So it probably wouldn't be that different, but its still kinda funny.

How are people afraid of the Gunbai? Cuz they're not old enough to have seen Madara use it and since he's a ghost, shouldn't all portraits/pictures of him be gone. I mean I guess there's still the statue. But Madara's not weilding a fan in that one. Are students just told in the academy that the fan is bad or is it more like a cultural aversion to fans. If that's the case then are they afraid of the fan or just dislike it? Cuz its kinda implied that Gai panicked upon seeing the fan and opened the 6th gate, but that's a big reaction that would only be triggered by actual fear instead of disgust.

Sorry for the long ramble. I was just so excited to see Oot update that my words got away from me. Love your fic!

Warnings for slight spoilers, it's more background necklace stuff only in point 1 but just fyi in case it’s important to you!

1. Yes! I love that headcanon but this one has a slightly different history behind it. Madara did give it to him, but it's the necklace he inherited from his mother that his father gave her. This is bc in the "canon" history, Madara and Hashirama were never public about their relationship. The traditional Uchiha courtship necklace was incredibly recognizable (the magatama ie the big "comma" symbol on sage/indra/ashura's clothes) so Madara couldn't easily make him one. However, Tajima made the same necklace for Kou but it broke into its now-recognizable shape of today and she refused to wear any other necklace but that one, saying it was unique among all the Uchiha's (she also compared it to a dick when Tajima added the two beads on either side to make it look nicer, but that's bc Kou had a rather coarse sense of humor). Typically the mother's necklace is inherited by the oldest daughter but since Kou only had sons, it went to Madara and was one of the last things he had of her. It was his declaration of love to give it to Hashirama and, considering how vilified and demonized Kou was to the Senju, his own declaration to accept and wear it.

2. Oh you better believe they’ll run laps together! (edit: I realized this got buried in my drafts so Chapter 17 has already come out, so yes you predicted part of the future 😜) Hashirama will be little more proactive in his revenge so no stumbling upon them haha! And Gai already has plans to introduce the terrors to his genin team 😉

3. He’ll accidentally stumble upon Kakashi’s specific distaste of the outfit but you better believe once he finds, he’ll just happen to bring it up to Kakashi every once in a while just to see his reaction. 

The issue with the gunbai is it’s specifically associated with the Ghost of the Uchiha. Madara’s individual name got lost (only the elders, ninja with access to classified records, and certain clans remember it). But the “Ghost” was a bogeyman to Konoha, an evil, terrible man who was cursed with only hatred in his heart, who turned on the village and tried to destroy it. 

(In the full story, it also connects Konoha’s hatred of Kurama specifically (the monster the Ghost used to try and destroy the village) which will also be connected to one reason why the jinchuriki were always set up to be pariahs, and how by killing Madara, Hashirama’s deification as the God of Shinobi was complete, as well as another reason the Uchiha were separated and held at arms length which only worsened over time as the story became more and more mythologized and Madara’s past contributions as a founder were lost.)

Because there weren’t paintings/statues of the Ghost (except for VotE which...I think is actually a bit of a controversial piece for Konoha tbh, and the Uchiha’s secret mural) the only thing that really stuck to symbolize him was the gunbai. This is a very American-centric perspective and I will be the first to admit isn’t a perfect parallel by any means but the kind of fear/hatred most of Konoha and especially ninja have towards the gunbai/Ghost can be thought of like the Red Scare panic. The “paranoia” point isn’t quite met but that kind of visceral hatred and fear over something that they’re told to fear and hate but don’t actually have first hand experience is similar. I also think it could work as a kind of dark reflection of the Will of Fire ideology. If you’re not someone who would sacrifice everything for the village and endure relentlessly...are you going to betray the village and become the next Ghost? That’s not a vocal belief in Konoha, but more something that’s kind of implied by the black/white mentality that nationalism kind of inspires. The emotion is only towards gunbai in particular, but the culture around fans in general and them being “too similar” has created an aversion to all fans esp in the ninja clans. Tenten has a small tessen (an iron hand held fan) but it’s something that very clearly marks her as clanless to other shinobi because no clan ninja would own one. 

All of this to say, when Gai first saw the gunbai unexpectedly the years of being taught this explicitly and implicitly kicked in and he reacted. It was a panicked instinct and if he weren’t the amazing man we know and love seeing Madara with the gunbai and definitely knowing their connection, other ninja in Konoha would find it perfectly reasonable for him to then try and attack Madara.

I hope this clears things up, I felt I got a bit rambly in the middle!

[sophi-s]

In Their Hollow Heart

Chapter II: Absolution

Fandom: Hollow Knight video game

Words: 9,832

Characters: Hollow Knight, Hornet, Ghost (the Knight), the Radiance, Tiso (he’s alive, screw the cannon XD), the Pale King

Warnings: Blood and Gore, Violence, Sickness, Mind manipulation, Suicidal thoughts, Vomit, Gross imagery, Self harm TW, Permanent injury, Angst, SPOILERS for the game.

Summary:

The tormented Hollow Knight unexpectedly stands face to face with one they thought dead throughout their whole life. And to their astonishment, the very same bug does the impossible and relieves them of their duty.

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Another day passes in utter silence in the Black Egg Temple. Nothing disturbs the stillness of this place aside from a steady sound similar to a heartbeat which comes from the pulsing veins of Infection. And at the centre of the dark chamber illuminated weakly by the said Infection hangs a large, slender figure in armor and a cape. The passage of long years hasn’t done much justice to the once silver-white attire. Cloaked in shadow and held firmly by enchanted chains, the figure makes no move. Only indicators of the spark of life still flickering weakly in them is a loud, disturbingly raspy breath and the furious light in their eyes glinting with madness. Deemed worthy and strong enough to contain the Goddess of Dreams, the failed Vessel holds as still as a statue, sometimes squirming in futile attempts to break free from the chains. The disease keeps spreading without control, only halted by the Void in the ruined body of its host. Such is the fate of the Hollow Knight.

Since the Radiance had torn their willpower to pieces, the Hollow Knight found their true self slipping away into darkness way too often, hopelessly seeking relief in dreams but unsurprisingly finding none in the domain of their tormentor. If anything, all that waited for them there was more pain. Everything they wanted was to be finally free from this cursed existence, this… mockery of life. But it seems even that was too much to ask for, desoite the fact that they’d been promised an end long ago now. The Pure Vessel was never supposed to think, have feelings or desires. For its mind should be empty. They shouldn't want anything. And their fate was brutally reminding them of that.

Day by day, their body was burning up from the disease that held them tight in its grasp, making them wish for the end all the more. Memories began to fade as they fought to keep them from escaping. Without them… they would become just another husk animated by Her light. And it scared them.. Fear, alongside dejection, seemed to be an emotion that accompanied them constantly these days... They just needed one strong person to open this blasted Vault. Just one skilled knight to shatter the chains and put them out of their misery. But then the Radiance would be fully free. Nothing would be stopping Her from wiping the Hallownest off the pages of history. If only one of the lost siblings survived… empty like their father wanted. The true Hollow Knight. Just one, to successfully relieve them of their duty… Cruel. Something scolded the Vessel at these thoughts. They deserved what they'd gotten for their lies and had the audacity to wish for the same fate on someone else? Selfish. Cruel. Cruel! In despair (much stronger than sadness they knew already...), the Hollow Knight let themself slip away again, unable to argue with the laughter of the Goddess.

Like father, like son!

They had no wish to face the Radiance again so soon but their weariness took the better of them. Maybe this time She will have mercy on them and fulfill Her end of the bargain? Who knows? Soon they found out it unsurprisingly was not going ot be the case. However… when they left their infested shell behind to drift through the Realm of Dreams something has changed. Everything around was shaped differently. In this dream, they stood tall and proud, they were free and the scorching heat of the disease no longer troubled them. Memories returned in full with the moment they opened their black eyes. The pure nail rested in their hands - yes, hands! - its sharp tip on the ground at their feet as they started forward at nothing in particular. Like they had many times in the White Palace. What an odd dream… everything was dark and grey, chains swung from the sky around but never touched them and the inky smoke of Void drifted around. Just to make sure, they flex the fingers of their right hand. It responds as it should but it's.. numb. They have no feeling in the offending appendage. As though - bitter laughter bubbles up in their chest but never comes to be - it wasn't truly there. Was this another form of torture? Was the Radiance tormenting them again by showing them what they could've been but will never be? Their armor was beautiful and silver, glinting in the pale light of white sigils surrounding the strange arena they found themself in. As enchanting as the dream was, it caused them only further misery. Now they began to understand those who considered the Nightmare King the good-aligned deity and not the Radiance. Dreams cause disappointment with the reality - because it could be just like in this dream - while nightmares allow one find comfort and appreciate the world as it is.. A soft pitter patter of small feet behind them was all they needed to snap. Had She conjured an illusion of their baby sister running around them and bouncing in place, pleading to be picked up, as well?

Enough!

The Hollow Knight jammed their nail further into the ground in frighteningly unfamiliar fury - anger but... stronger, more violent somehow - as their armor started to give out underneath the pressure of seething Void before shattering into tiny pieces, leaving them only in their plain light-grey cloak. If She wanted them to cast off their hollow mask then congratulations, because She just managed to royally piss them off. Even that day when they saw three ethereal nails protruding from their father's chest as he fought for life bleeding out on the ground after Xero attacked him in disease-induced insanity they weren't this mad at the Goddess. And before they never thought it even possible. Whipping around angrily, ready to face the doppelganger of tiny Hornet, they intended to end this foul dream. I won't have the strength to cut her down. A small voice whispered. Illusion or not, they wouldn't have it in them to harm their little sister. Still, they were ready to face down whatever the Radiance wanted to throw at them. But what they saw instead made them freeze for a moment in shock and horror. Nothing could've prepared them for what waited behind them. As unmoving as always, their face didn't show the fear that paralyzed them. Fear just like any other but much more intense. Crippling. Petrifying. Horror.

Before them, standing no taller than their kneecap, stood… not Hornet. Worse still, someone they never thought they'd be seeing again as long as they still draw breath. Small, lithe and dressed in a ragged cloak.. A memory flashed before their eyes, a pale face gawking at them and silently crying for help.. None other than their lost twin. Just like the day they left the poor child to die in the Abyss, staring up at them with their large, empty eyes from the white shell with slim horns sporting tiny notches at their ends. And in those hollow eyes, there was no hatred, no accusation, no sadness, nothing.. aside from a small spark of something resembling surprised fondness. As though they were.. happy to see the older twin. Through the link of the Void, the Hollow Knight heard a small voice reach out to them. No, not a voice. more like.. a thought or an emotion shaped into a single word that struck them like a nail to the gut.

Sibling!

No, this can't be.. this isn't true! Their twin is dead! Resting on the bottom of the Abyss with all the shattered shells of other siblings. Does Her depravity know no bounds? They will not let the Radiance toy with them like that! Throwing their head back, the Hollow Knight wished to scream out their hatred into the darkened skies but… no sound leaves their throat. No voice...  As it was meant to be. No matter. It changes nothing. They barely paid any mind to a mysterious figure in a brass mask watching them from a gilded throne with curiosity and reverence as they lunged at the ghost of their sibling with cold rage and fiery determination. And to their surprise, they felt.. strong. Just like they used to before their imprisonment and absorbing the Old Light. And what was even odder, the fake twin easily avoided their attack by dissolving into a shadowy form that passed through their body without any resistance like icy cold air. Its cool brush unexpectedly turned into a sharp bite and to Hollow Knight’s surprise, once they looked down on themself they discovered that a shallow cut suddenly appeared on their side, dripping small amount of Void. Strange..

Unimportant. This was but a scratch, barely visible. Still, rather strange... Not letting it throw them off, the Pure Vessel immediately leaped into the air only to descend onto the twin's head and slam their nail into the ground, focusing to summon Soul Pillars and impale the little one. With no luck. The child unfolded six, glowing wings - just like the ones father had on his back, they noticed glumly - just in time to move out of the way of the pale blades. They followed up the narrow dodge by swinging their tiny, pure nail - a rare, fine weapon - at the older sibling's face. The blade cracked loudly against their shell, knocking stars into their vision for a moment. The Hollow Knight recoiled, both in pain from the strike and in shock from how… real it felt.

The Radiance is a master of weaving Dreams but something was not right. Even the most realistic dreams cannot feel so true. Vision should be more blurry, their senses duller.. but they weren't. Besides, a strike this hard definitely should've slapped them awake without issue. Yet, here they still were. But it's not like they had time to ponder over it. They were in the middle of a duel, for Wyrm's sake. Gathering their bearings, the Pure Vessel let their battle instincts take over. Writhing shadows consumed them and reformed their body on the other end of what they with all certainty could call an arena and extended their numb hand to shoot out a barrage of Soul Daggers at their opponent.

The fight went one like this for quite some time, the ghost managing to get hits on their sibling between their fast-paced, merciless attacks and spells. Small size worked on advantage for Hollow Knight's adversary who always somehow found a way to worm their way to their target without getting hit (minus that one time they failed to dodge one of the daggers and it slashed across their shoulder). At least until the Vessel has had enough of this little game. Intending to surprise the illusion of their twin, the Hollow Knight arched their back and released a pair of thrashing Void Tendrils from their own chest and finally knocked the little vessel down, leaving them stunned for a moment. Giving them no room to breathe, they followed up with a triple slash of their long nail and whacked the unfortunate child to the side before pouncing on them and pinning them down with their free hand.

No more trickery. This ends here and now. But… even though they were eager to shatter the cruel illusion, the Vessel had to admit that this fight made them feel… alive. For the first time in forever since the time stopped flowing for them. It was kind of sad to end this already. Why would the Radiance entertain me with a battle? But something in the back of their head was compelling them to carry on. Fully prepared to stab the nail down into the tiny body squirming in their hold, the Hollow Knight raised their weapon when suddenly… they heard clapping. Blinking down befuddled, they realised it was the child clapping their small, nubby hands, oblivious to the fact that Void was now seeping through a crack in their mask and from a slash across their chest, and that they were about to die. Congratulating them?

Sibling won! Sibling is still so strong!

Words sent through the Void said. If the Hollow Knight didn't know any better, they'd think the miniature twin seemed.. impressed. Were they actually impressed? What is going on? Focusing on the weak bond between the two of them, the Hollow Knight squinted. There was something… familiar about the presence of the tiny vessel and by no means was it the sense of closure they shared long ago. No, it was something else. Beating within their heart, familiar, yet foreign at the same time. It almost felt like the presence of the Pale King but.. darker. It felt like... home. Is that…? Slowly, the Hollow Knight let a small glimmer of hope rekindle in their broken heart. Believing that this might not be an illusion. But… what was it in that case? What does this mean? Their twin lives? How…?

Will come back! Help sibling! Just a little longer...

They chirped happily through the connection between their minds before some unseen power forced the Hollow Knight's hand down and brought the pure nail straight through their small heart, silencing it in an instant. Dream particles erupted from their shattered body and the Hollow Knight suddenly found themself back in the Egg. In chains, rotten through and absolutely flabbergasted. Severe confusion fused into one emotion with surprise. Whatever happened, it snapped them back to reality. To cold, rough bonds, to the burning Infection tearing its ruthless claws into their insides.. And for just a short moment, they felt their head clear out. Only one question remained. What was that supposed to mean? Whatever that was.. Their questions were aggressively halted by a jolt of pain and a mist clouding their senses.

Ever since this strange dream, the Radiance started to force Her will onto the Hollow Knight much more brutally, trying to keep them Her pawn - though they initially weren’t sure why - causing them so much pain it more than once made them pass out. But even still, the Vessel and the Radiance were one. They felt something in Her they hadn't before. And it was nothing different than straight out fear in its purest form. She was afraid. A Goddess. What could She possibly be afraid of? The little sibling. Something told them when the memory of the darkness pulsing within the small vessel's chest came to mind. Slowly, they began to understand. She was attempting to keep them as far away from that dream as possible as this one seemed to be out of Her direct control.. And soon, the Hollow Knight was about to realise they'd never been more right in their life before.

In spite of Her efforts, they returned to the arena again. Greeted by the sight of their twin just like the first time. And an unexplainable force made them fight the child. It ended as expected when the ghost fell yet again after a stray Soul Dagger cracked their shell apart. And again, impaled on a Soul Pillar. And again, caught in the area of an exploding Focus spell, after that. But they never gave up. And each time this dream repeated, the more apparent Radiance's apprehension was becoming. As broken and tortured as they were, the Hollow Knight found some small semblance of hope rising from the depths of their despair again. Resurrected by the supposedly dead twin sibling. Killing them over and over again brought the Vessel no joy but whatever this dream was, whatever the tiny voidling was attempting to do, it scared the life out of the Goddess of Dreams Herself, filling the Hollow Knight with wicked satisfaction. A pleasant feeling one feels after accomplishing some great feat or watching something... well, satisfying happen. Oh, how they wished to live to see Her get what's coming to her.. For the first time in what felt like forever, the Hollow Knight felt the urge to smile (metaphorically, as their face cannot really express much), even through the pain She was inflicting on them. Soon, they found themself looking forward to battling their twin again.

With each time the ghost challenged the Pure Vessel to a fight, they were getting stronger, faster, more cunning. And when a decisive strike of a small nail finally brought them down to their knees the Hollow Knight couldn't help the alien feeling of gentle warmth welling up in their chest, the overwhelming… joy. Was this what their father felt when they took on all of the Five Knights at the same time and won? Was this.. pride? Even leaking Void from every possible body part and in pain (different from the disease, more familiar and somewhat comforting), they wished to mentally smile at their tiny counterpart but never had a chance as ray of blinding light - dreadfully familiar bright light - descended on the twin siblings and a cry of outrage echoed through the air, making both of them look up. A brutal yank brought the Hollow Knight back into their plagued body but… something was different. No force was ripping their sentience out from their grasp. The Radiance, while present in their head, paid them no mind as Her overwhelming fury filled every fiber of their being, sending ripples through the Infection clinging to them. What is happening?

It continued for a couple more minutes before an excruciating pain shot through the Hollow Knight without a single warning as a soul rending screech of the Dream Goddess made their head feel like it was about to explode. They seized and trembled when the horrid sensation did not cease. Their heart began to hammer in their chest quickly and unevenly, sometimes skipping a beat until they twisted in their bindings and released a cry of agony. But it wasn't their voice. They lacked one of their own after all. It was the Radiance. All their entrails felt as though they were set on fire or something was tearing them apart from the inside. In fear and confusion, the Vessel trashed about, Infection pouring freely from their opened mouth and eyes but they could sense some feelings that weren't theirs. Rage. Denial. Terror. Through the burning light filling up the entirety of their vision they saw Her figure writhing amidst a foreign darkness invading Her domain. Just there, at the peak of this darkness - as if the steadied, yet still ravenous Abyssal Sea rose up to challenge its nemesis - stood the familiar presence of the Hollow Knight's twin. And She was undoubtedly completely and absolutely terrified.

But the satisfaction coming from this fear did not ease in pain or the gurgling coughs ejecting the pus from their throat. The Hollow Knight felt as though their head was being split in two as the Infection was aggressively beating against the walls of their weak body, violently peeling itself off their organs and simultaneously desperately trying to keep itself rooted inside. A strained wheeze that escaped them sounded like a death rattle of an asthmatic Wyrm. Fitting, considering their origins.. It was much less funny when taking into account the fact that they couldn't breathe. They screamed alongside the Radiance, desperately gulping down every, even the smallest gasp of air they could. Another shriek tore through them and the bulging tumors on their chest abruptly ruptured, as did the ones on the stump of their right arm, spilling the disgusting, rotten fluids every which way. Infection was sizzling and thrashing about with a mind of its own until it started to evaporate in the clouds of sticky, rapidly fading smoke.

It takes a lot to bring a seasoned warrior to the point of crying out of pain but this was more than enough. Before, the Infection existed mostly in "agreement" with its host but now the Vessel felt as though they had ingested a bucket of potent acid. Tears - their normal, Void tears - started to flow uncontrollably as they shivered in spasms. The Hollow Knight didn't know how long this ordeal lasted so far but even half dazed by the pain they knew one thing. They were dying without a doubt. And the Infection inside was dying with them. Despite the dark thoughts inhabiting their broken mind as of late, ones whispering of sweet, cold claws of death, they were scared. Their twin, one whom they presumed dead for so long came back in a desperate attempt to help them, even in a dream. They couldn't let their efforts be for naught and die just like that! Praying to all Gods of Hallownest for strength, the Vessel drew another struggling breath that lined their lungs with miniscule needles and pins.

Help... Someone... anyone...

And then suddenly… the screaming stopped. The next thing the Hollow Knight knew was that the light was gone from their sight, replaced by blackness. Seconds later, or maybe longer, they couldn't say for certain, a heavy impact brought the scraps of consciousness back to them. At first, they were sure they'd been struck but in truth it was their form limply hitting the floor when they crumpled in a heap like a puppet when one cuts the strings. The stone tiles were underneath their cheek, the hold of chains absent. Burning pain remained but it was… different somehow. It wasn't the searing of the Old Light but the injuries it left behind. Even with their mind swirling like a carousel, the Hollow Knight realised it felt.. clear. Clearer than it has in ages. No alien presence lingers in the depths of their psyche. Still, the splitting headache wasn't making the thoughts easier to formulate. Do not think. It will be easier this way.

Although the possibility of receiving an answer sacares them, the Hollow Knight has to make sure. They hesitantly search through their own mind and quietly call.

Old Light?

Nothing. Silence.

Are you still there..?

No response. Dead quiet. Darkness. No internal fire, no force pressing against the remnants of their resolve and forcing its will upon them. No wisps dancing around in their vision, only dots of black and sparks of white caused by the pain. In their heaving chest, their black heart skips a beat. Could it be? Hesitantly, the Hollow Knight tries to move, to lift their arm. The appendage raises according to their will, trembling violently and falling to the floor not even a second later but there's nothing aside from their exhaustion holding them back or setting their entire system ablaze. It has to be. The Infection left. As hard to believe as it is… the Radiance.. She's gone. They can't feel Her anymore. The Darkness took over. Her light has been extinguished, at long last. In their mind they can feel a large hole, an empty space where She used to reside but this emptiness feels... good.

Happy. No, that's not the right word to call the emotion that assaults them, making them want to scream and weep, and laugh out loud all at the same time while being able to do only the second part. Struggling to form a forbidden thought, fighting the still present fever, they search for the right name for this one. Ecstatic? Yeah, that feels more like it.. However, the Hollow Knight doesn't spare time to rejoice. If they do they soon too will be gone.

Clenching their jaws, the mangled Vessel attempts to lift themself on their remaining arm but the weakened appendage gives out underneath their meager weight as though it was made of jelly. Unfortunately, their armor wasn't making the whole thing easier. The fall leaves them disoriented and stunned for a moment until they feel something wet pooling beneath their face. Forcing their head, which seems to weigh far too much, as though it was made out of lead, to turn, they see black. Void. Void spilling from their wounds and their right eye where their shell had cracked. Not the pus but pure Void. As black as it could ever be. It was… both comforting in color and disconcerting in amount. Losing that much life essence would kill a normal bug at least six times over. They needed to try something different before their Shade slips free from its confines to rejoin the Abyssal Sea. Focusing on a Healing spell was out of question with how drained of energy they were. Attempts to pull themself back to their knees also yield no results aside from agonizing stabs through the torn chitin on their chest where the cysts once were and left deep, bleeding holes after they'd bursted. Not all tumors were gone just yet. Some were still there, throbbing and scorching them with the now apparently caustic fluids.

Enough with this cursed plague! Without care for their own wellbeing, only wanting the Infection finally OUT, the Hollow Knight makes their conscious decision, rolls slightly to the side to have a more or less clear view and focuses their anger on the remaining cysts.. Their shivering hand wanders over to the last cluster of Infection still anchored to their body and hovers there for a single beat.. It's better to get this done with before they change their mind. In one swift motion, sharp tips of their claws sink into their own flesh. One drag is enough to tear deep gashes in the mutated membrane. The pustules split open with a sensation not dissimilar to being ran through with a white hot iron bar. The Hollow Knight gasps in pain, with a pang of worry realising that their breathing remained loud, ragged and unsettling. No wonder. After all this, most of their organs were likely severely damaged if not ceased to function at all. Orange liquid quickly drains from the self-inflicted wounds before being replaced by Void. It wasn't one of their finest moments, it hurt like hell but they didn't want this blasted stuff inside of them for a single second longer. Now, they were left still stuck splayed out on the floor and bleeding out at an alarming rate. They don't have much time left. Looking around, noting the lack of Infected veins and bubbles, they let their eyes linger on their old, trusty nail. If that doesn't work, then nothing will.

Scraping their head through the dust that accumulated on the floor throughout years, the Hollow Knight crawls to their discarded weapon, leaving a trail of quickly dissipating Void in their wake, and heaves themself up to get a hold of the hilt. Any second, they feared the chains would shoot out to trap them again but no such thing happened. Only two fo the longer sections remained attached to their shoulder pads and were dragging behind them. The Infection was eradicated. The purpose of the Temple fulfilled. As was theirs. Their hand trembles but otherwise holds fast as they pull up onto their knees, still wheezing dreadfully. For so long, the Hollow Knight ceaselessly begged all Higher Beings for the blessing of death, wishing their nail was in their reach so that they could end their own misery. Now… here it was in their grasp. Waiting, taunting. All it takes is one stab. Just one little push… You failed. Disappointment. Pick it up, turn the tip towards their already open chest and drive the blade through their heart. No one would miss a failure like you. The Vessel's hand tightens around the nail. It would be so easy… Just a second and it will be over. You're already as good as dead. Their task had come to an end. There's nothing more for them here. Do it!

Slowly, the Hollow Knight forces themself to stand on their weak and shaky legs, using their unkempt weapon as a crutch instead. Too late for that now. If they have to die, they'd rather do so out in the open. Everywhere but in this grave. All limbs hurt. The pain is insufferable… Do not feel.. They breathe raggedly, letting the sharp throbbing subside. Can they even make it to the outside world? What if the Dreamer Seals linger still? Do not think… No thoughts. Pick a destination. The entrance to the Egg. Don't ponder over it. Endure.

First steps come with difficulty - they hadn't walked in years and their legs feel as though the Infection has hollowed them out - they stumble and fall to their knees more than once but never give up. They refused to give up ever again. Eventually, each next step becomes easier as they drag their husk of a crippled body towards the doorway - the chains singing their grim song against the floor behind them - where their father disappeared all those years ago. Even now, after all the suffering they'd endured, the Hollow Knight hoped the Pale King is still out there somewhere. If so then the chances are once he realises the Radiance is no more, he will return to reclaim his Kingdom without the threat of the Infection hanging grimly over his head. And when that day comes, they will meet again. And after that, they will find mother too. And apologise for their defeat. Maybe they will even grant the Hollow Knight the forgiveness they don't deserve? Yes, that sounds good… If they live up to this moment, that is.. If not, then maybe their parents will at least lay their body to rest? Still, the thought of their father being dead and gone forever nearly makes them give in and fall again, unwilling to keep pushing forward. No. The Pale King is a God. It's not a trivial task to kill a Higher Being. They know it. He has to be alive. Doesn't he? Clinging to this tiny ray of hope, the Hollow Knight staggers through the dark corridor of the Temple, heading towards the light at the end where the (thank Wyrm!) opened door awaits.

A wave of stale air smelling of dirt crashes over them at the entrance and almost makes them cry with relief. No more sweet stench of Her plague. This is really happening.. Begging their weak body to hold on just a wee bit longer, they push towards their freedom. Though, no matter how hard they tried, their armor was slowing them down and making moving around difficult. In an attempt to spare the rapidly diminishing reserves of their strength, the Hollow Knight uses their claws to slash through the straps holding their shoulder pads in place they clumsily fight to unclip their ruined breastplate. With how it was bent out torn open and completely eaten through by the acidic Infection, it comes off without much difficulty and soon each armor piece hits the floor with a series of metallic clangs.

To be honest, the Vessel had no delusions they would survive this. Only one look at the ruptured chitin on their chest told them everything. After tearing the last pustules open they could've sworn for a moment they'd seen their heart trembling inside but it might as well have been a hallucination. In any case, they were too severely injured to pull through without aid and considering the sorry state of Hallownest, that is not happening. Even if they could call for help, they doubt anyone would heed their desperate pleas. Disoriented by the disappearance of the Infection and scared, any survivors, who aren't in equally as sorry state as them, are likely to head in the opposite direction. Besides, they couldn't imagine anyone would dare to touch the disgusting mess of a broken being they are now. At least… they will die happy, out in the open, gazing out at their homeland. Knowing it is safe and that they have their twin to thank for it. And that the ghost of their mistakes doesn't hold a grudge for the wrong they'd done.

A glimpse of red. A moving figure, just outside. Some strange sense of familiarity lights up a spark in the Hollow Knight's mind. Just a few more steps… After what felt like an eternity, the hero of Hallownest emerges from the Black Egg that was their and Her prison for so long and comes face to face with the shadow of their past. The Weaver clad in red dress took on a defensive stance and drew a needle once they leaned heavily against their nail, trying to steady their breathing. Red dress.. needle… strands of silk angrily lashing behind.. mask as pale as the King's.. Far more adult than they remember but still familiar. It cannot be.

It cannot be that for once since this madness had begun, the Hollow Knight has a stroke of good luck. Their tired eyes land on the one they remember as a small, temperamental girl. The spiderling princess of Deepnest. Even though the passage of time changed her, there can be no mistake. It was her. Their sister. Hornet… No longer a girl, but a young adult. How long has it truly been? And there was utter shock painted across her face once she realised that she's looking at her long lost, stoic sibling who was taken from her when she was a child. No aggressive glow in their eyes. Only soothing black, silently asking for help. What little strength they had left finally abandons them as they fall over face first again, smiling to themself inwardly. What a happy coincidence. Not only will death claim them free and at peace but in the presence of their beloved baby sister. Despite what they'd been expecting, they don't hit the floor. Instead, their body collapsed straight into Hornet's arms. How she didn't keel over underneath the weight of their much larger form was a mystery.

A firm grip on their shoulders, a pair of strong hands hardened by years of combat cautiously lower them to the kneeling position as a concerned Hornet fills their entire vision. How similar to their father she is… The same hands cup their face, just like Her wings had before (don't think about it, don't panic, it's just Hornet! They reprimanded themself when they begin to tremble), to make them look ta her. Clearly, she's saying something to them in a very frantic non-Hornet-like fashion but they can no longer hear. Her fingers gently caress the Hollow Knight's forehead, deliberately avoiding the crack in their shell and the spilling Void that could potentially kill her as the other hand rests on the underside of their mask. Such a gentle, loving gesture.. unfamiliar yet so… comforting… Each touch sends a delighted tremor through Hollow Knight's succumbing body. They didn't know one could be missing something that was never received in the first place. Yet, here they are. Yes.. yes, now they are ready. They are ready to go.. Were it not for Hornet, they wouldn't have managed to keep their head up. When they cough and wheeze, she starts speaking again. And this time bits and pieces do get through to the Hollow Knight.

"...-be alright-... -...ust hold on…!"

Weakly, the Vessel nuzzles their face into her touch as they heave in attempts to take another breath. Maybe the Hollow Knight was ready to face death but it doesn't mean they weren't afraid of it. They truly want to reassure Hornet that all will indeed be alright. But they can't. It's terribly cold out here… Flashes of images, glimpses of faces pass through their mind. Every bug they'd known well and those they met only once as well. As colorless and empty as their life had been, it was.. good. They lived a good life...

Then, suddenly, it's not Hornet they're looking at anymore. A luminous form of a small bug with multiple sleek horns shaping into a crown on the top of his head. The Pale King stands there with an aghast expression and holds their heavy head in his blackened hands making his child stare in bewilderment. He looked so real! But it cannot be him.. The feverish mind of he Vessel doesn't seem to care though. Am I dead already...? Black eyes in the pale face of their father watch the dying Hollow Knight with anguish gleaming in them. He’d never looked at them like this.. To hell with their Pure Vessel facade, they’re dying anyway... What does it matter at this point? An uncontrollable shiver makes them seize in pain rippling through their whole body as they swallow the black liquid filling their mouth and they lift their shaking hand to surprisingly firmly grasp the front of Pale King’s robes to keep him here just a little longer. The fabric seems.. strange to the touch...

Father, don't leave..

They want to call what they wished to years ago when they didn't have the courage to but.. No voice to cry suffering. The darkness is upon them and there's nothing in sight that could stop it. It was a miracle they lived long enough to crawl out of the Temple. If they were a normal bug so heavily Infected, they wouldn't have gotten up from where they'd fallen at all. Their last regret was that after all this, they will leave their twin behind. Again. And do so without so much as a single "thank you" for everything they'd done. But Gods... they were so tired.. Leaning forward the Hollow Knight rests their head on their father’s shoulder, possibly ruining the robe in the process with the Void leaking from their shell. Even if it was just the figment of their imagination, they didn’t care. To die peacefully, whether it be in the arms of Hornet or his father, was more than they could ask for or ever deserve. They breathe out with relief and for the first time in an eternity slip away into the embrace of sleep without fear in their heart, never expecting to wake up again.

Please, forgive me... All of you...

To their utter astonishment… they do. First thing they register is warmth. Not the burning fire of the disease tearing at their every nerve. A soft, comforting warmth filling up their entire being. Air around is hot and humid. Without opening their eyes, the Hollow Knight draws a loud breath that sounds kind of like a suffocating Vengefly. Strangely enough, the dense air does not hurt their damaged lungs. Quite the opposite. It spreads around their respiratory system like a balm, easing the burning left by Her plague. So long… so long since they felt any sort of something pleasant.. They could stay like this in the warmth forever and everything else can shove off with the odd, stinging pressure in their belly taking the lead. If only they could breathe easier… It takes barely a split of a second after their sudden wheeze for a pair of hands to rest on the sides of their head to steady it.

"No, no, don't you dare! Hornet's gonna tear my face off if you die!"

No memory of a name comes to mind with this male voice that sounds as though it was coming from behind a glass wall. As much as they want to remain inert, the Hollow Knight forces their eyes to pry open, wincing inwardly at the bright white glow of Soul surrounding everything, emanating from the… water they're in? A hot spring? Absent-mindedly noting they cannot see with their right eye as something was draped over it, the Hollow Knight looks up at… exactly, who? Looming over them upside down and still holding their head, was a hooded warrior with big white eyes. An ant most likely, judging by features. The unfamiliarity of the face made Hollow Knight tense in agitation but their limbs were unresponsive and aching, refusing to move. The stranger firmly held their head still even as they began to stir.

"Easy there. Not gonna hurt you. I'm a friend."

A friend? The no-longer-Sealed Vessel isn't sure what this means but they assume it's a good thing. The Pale King more than once called either one of the Five, or the future Dreamers (except for Herrah as she was the mother of his daughter) a "friend" with fondness in his voice when in good mood. Besides, if this ant really knows Hornet.. If they were being honest, the Hollow Knight was much too spent to feel threatened or try to analyse the situation to determine whether the ant does pose any threat or not. They ceased their struggling to continue wheezing heavily, fighting for air. Seems like it's not going away anytime soon.. With their every breath, the warrior's frown was deepening.

"No clue what battered you like that but I don't wanna meet it."

And you won't… The Hollow Knight thinks to themself with a sense of relief washing over them. She really is gone. They weren't sure what their twin did and how but they'd done it. No more Infection. No more pain. No more struggle.. A silent hope that they might have gotten a second chance makes them slump in the warm water working on their injuries. This warmth causes them to grow awfully sleepy, maybe they really did lose too much "blood" and were actually dying, but the stranger above them was determined to keep them in the waking world.

"For the love of- No! Stay with me! Hornet will kill me if you don't!"

Hornet.. The sound of her name somewhat keeps them from passing out. She must've been the one to bring them here. Then... it can’t have been their father they were seeing earlier... Just like they thought, their imagination was merely playing tricks on them, reshaping Hornet’s already similar features into those of the Pale Wyrm, and all this time it was her. Where did she go? Hornet wouldn't leave without a good reason… Speaking of which-..

TISO! Back the fuck off!"

Familiar, yet far more mature voice of Hollow Knight's younger sister almost brings small rocks raining down from the ceiling, making the ant in question jump away from them. As unexpected as her arrival is, it brings the Vessel peace and a sense of security.

"Okay, WOW! First you literally drag me down here by my antennae and now you yell at me for actually helping? Rude."

"May I remind you you owe me a favor? Now shut up and move."

"Geez, calm down princess! Your buddy was just breathing very loudly, I legitimately thought they're choking or something."

"I still don't trust you."

"Then why the FUCK-...?!"

As if to prove Tiso's point, the Hollow Knight descended into a fit of rattling coughs when they tried to move to see their sister, unintentionally making the strain in their stomach worse, proceeding to wheeze horribly afterwards. The Infection took a lot out of them… The arguing duo ceased in an instant (though the Hollow Knight could've sworn they felt the energy of "didn't I tell you" radiating off of the smug ant). Hornet didn't wait before walking into the hot spring and helping her older sibling sit up. Everything protests at the movement, especially their chest - now, like the stump of their arm, bound in bandages made of Weaver silk - but they don't stop her. They close their eyes as she does, breathing deeply until the painful wheezes slowly turn into nearly soundless huffs. Still, they feel and hear their breath eerily whistling in their lungs.

"That's it, keep breathing. It'll be alright. Here. This should help."

Out of a hidden pocket in her red dress she brandishes a bottle filled with gently glowing blue liquid. Lifeblood. So that's what she'd gone for.. The Hollow Knight blinks at the vial she holds, waiting for permission out of habit. They aren't quite sure if there is a point to keep the play up, especially before Hornet but… old habits die hard. Doing things without being prompted still felt... weird and uncomfortable. It causes a moment of awkward silence before Hornet frowns, seemingly catching a wind of what's going on, and brings the bottle closer to them.

"Take it. Drink."

In a beat the Hollow Knight seems to spring back to life and follows her instructions without any signs of hesitation. They down the blue concoction, bitter and by no means savory but they don't mind it. One, they aren't used to showing discomfort, two, they'd take the bitter over sweet and rotten any day. In comparison to the Infection, the Lifeblood was the best thing they'd tasted in a while. And true enough, the blue liquid works its magic quite quickly. The sharp throbbing of their wounds that the spring's power reduced to a bearable ache seemed to ease even more and some part of their strength returned to them. Honestly, they never understood why their father was so skeptical and untrusting towards the Lifeblood… On the other hand though, the Hollow Knight hangs their head low and grasps at their chest when they suddenly begin to feel awfully sick again.

"Hollow, are you-...?"

She starts but they silence her by lifting up their remaining hand when the familiar, sweetness dangerously quickly wells up in their throat. Oh no.. On an instinct, the Hollow Knight twists around and lurches forward, heaving out the contents of their stomach onto the cave floor. An unbelievably large amount of vibrant orange fluid mixed with freshly consumed Lifeblood and a little bit of Void makes its way out of the inside of their body, drawing disgusted groans from both witnesses. Well... so much for the Lifeblood treatment...

"EUGH! How the hell did all that stuff even fit inside this guy?!"

Mildly horrified Tiso asked the question into the air as Hornet, equally disturbed, didn't seem too eager to answer. The Hollow Knight was, thankfully, done in seconds and breathed out with relief once the tension left their stomach as the - hopefully - last traces of the Infection were expelled from their system. That feels so much better… As gross as the sticky substance was, the Hollow Knight found strange joy in watching the color fade into dull brown and eventually black before evaporating once and for all. Another proof. Though, the unpleasant aftertaste still lingered..

Sh-shit, I'm about to throw up too..."

With his hand over his mouth, Tiso quickly runs out of the cavern after the display and the smell left his own stomach very upset. The Hollow Knight isn't all that surprised. No one's going to try and convince the poor ant that what has just transpired wasn't thoroughly disgusting. Hornet merely rolled her eyes and returned her attention to her weakened sibling.

"How do you feel? Are you okay now?"

Never mind all the wounds which will surely leave awful scars. Never mind the dizziness that will eventually pass. Never mind the no longer existing right arm. The Hollow Knight looked Hornet straight in the eye but remained stone still, without a clue how to say it without words. Despite all the pain and the memories of suffering still fresh in their mind, they have never felt like this before. No more waking nightmares. No more Infection. No more Her. No more chains and bindings. Freedom. Peace. Safety. They are going to live to see another day and if the luck wishes to be on their side again, they will reunite with their father, mother and their sibling. Here they are, no threat in sight, beside their baby sister… "Okay" fails to describe one third of it.

"Hollow?"

Again, she called them this, trying to coax a response from the stiff voidling. And to be honest, it felt… nice. It was no longer the title mocking their existence but a sense of familiarity in it was putting the Vessel at ease. There's no need to pretend in front of Hornet. Who were they kidding, she certainly knew from the very beginning. And now she spoke this word as though it was a name like any other. The Hollow Knight never had a name. Though, they remember the Pale King accidentally calling them like this for short a couple times. Another fond memory. Yes. Yes, they like it that way.. They like that very much.

At Hornet's impatient and concerned prodding, Hollow bowed their much larger head until theirs and their sister's horns connected with an empty clunk. She seemed rather… shocked to say the least, judging by the look on her face. But fortunately the message was clear.

"You're ah... welcome, I guess.."

In response they only stared at her until she finally took a seat on the edge of the pool of healing water with her legs submerged. Hollow never had many interactions with people aside from following commands and watching their affairs from the side lines. Yet, there were moments, like after a particularly bad training session, when they received a gentle touch, most often from their mother. Root had a natural affinity to heal and she couldn't help but give into her motherly instincts when she saw her child hurting. Unfortunately, only until the young Pure Vessel managed to hone their skills to Focus Soul into healing injuries. And not so long ago Hornet was lightly stroking their head as they were knocking on death's door in her arms. Is this alright to ask her to do it again?

Uncertain, Hollow rested their heavy head beside where she sat, watching her out of the corner of their uncovered eye, the other wrapped up in Void-stained silk. Their memories of Hornet seemed so distant… The little girl with definitely too large amounts of energy stored within her tiny body was all over the Palace whenever she visited and she always found ways to sneak away to bother them. Not that they minded it. When Hollow found out the spiderling is their half sister from another mother, they took it as a point of honor to watch over her whenever they could, glad every time their father told them to do so. As cold and distant as he was, Hollow knew they loved their father, they just didn't know how to name this emotion yet. To feel safe and happy, to feel one would do anything for the person subjected to it.. With Hornet it felt… different. While they - metaphorically, of course - looked up to the Pale King, respected him and never doubted his words, every time Hornet was in sight they felt the same joyous warmth that came from the presence of either of their parents but laced with a protective instinct. They would follow the princess of Deepnest to hell and back if she asked them to and make sure she returns unscathed. Turns out, it is her who has to keep watch over them. How the tides have turned…

A small, lively child she always was, Hornet feared nothing and never backed out from any challenge. She even had a phase for a couple of months in the past when she declared she will kill the Infection for her dad on her own and it left the poor King utterly stressed out and terrified, ready to launch himself behind his cocky daughter at any moment so that Herrah doesn't gut him for being a "sorry excuse of a parent who can't even do his job properly". Memories like this bring the invisible smile to their face... Hollow couldn't imagine she would change much as she grew up. But it seems they still don't know their sister all that well.. With barely any noticeable hesitation she surprised her older sibling by lifting their head to her lap.

"I never thought I'd see you again. Let alone alive.."

She said more to herself than to anyone else as she rested her hand between their horns like they used to do to her when she was little. Uninfected. This word never left her mouth, as though saying it out loud would break the spell, but Hollow somehow knew that's what she meant. Nuzzled into the soft, albeit a bit worn dress and warmed by the magical waters of the hot spring, Hollow found a wave of unimaginable exhaustion, coming from years of being locked away with the Goddess of Dreams tormenting them, finally crashing over their broken body. After everything they've been through, they wanted and deserved to finally sleep in peace. But while before they were sure they were falling asleep never to return to the land of the living again and were okay with it, now some small, seemingly insignificant vestiges of fear lingered in the back of their psyche. They were plainly afraid of falling asleep. Hollow never wanted to have to stand before the Radiance ever again. However, this fear melted away with gentle strokes of Hornet's hand on their shell and the other one rubbing circles into their back to put them at ease the moment she noticed them fighting with their weariness.

"Hey, it's okay. She will never hurt you again."

Hollow knew this. They'd felt the Radiance at her strongest fall, even though they never thought it possible. Seems like the word "impossible" does not exist in their twin's dictionary.. But still, the fear was always there. What if I was wrong? What if this is just another hallucination? Those what ifs scared them all the same no matter what they'd seen and lived through. They knew that it's finally over. But they had to hear someone else say it with certainty. To make them believe. And Hornet's stern but sympathetic voice along with her comforting touch did just that. Finding new strength in their sore limbs, Hollow clambered up a little further onto the shore but not out of the warm water to lay more comfortably with their head still resting on Hornet's lap, and awkwardly reached around her waist with their left arm to snuggle up even closer like a desperate child they never had a chance to be. They weren't sure if they're doing the "hug-thing" right but it worked nonetheless. It took the fear away, soothed the ache of their shattered soul. With utmost certainty, they knew this was an emotion they liked feeling now that no one is here to judge them. Maybe they were wrong. Perhaps there's still a reason to keep going? Hornet never ceased caressing them and soon, Hollow found themself calmly falling asleep on her thighs with the last words they heard before slipping into the blessedly dreamless sleep ringing in their ears like a lullaby, the long forgotten tune of a small music box that the White Lady was so fond of...

…You are safe…

Out from the winding tunnels of Crossroads and into a cavern housing the healing waters of the hot spring, a pitch black shadow slithers across the ground like a serpent towards two sleeping figures slumped against one another. The temperature dips noticeably as it creeps closer to the Protector of Hallownest and the Hollow Knight resting at the shore oblivious to any form of danger while the hooded ant - saved from certain death by Hornet herself under the insistence of the Pale Wanderer - slumbers beneath an opposite wall with his arms crossed not to intrude on this peaceful moment. The shadow's attention is focused on the pair of pale siblings however. It raises and collapses in on itself like a liquid given life as it silently crawls up to the sleeping duo.

Reaching their side, the shadow begins to rise up from the ground and rapidly swell in size. The shapeless substance forms into a massive body with four, clawed arms, a large head adorned with multiple ghostly horns and dark tendrils swaying lightly from the creature's back. It stands tall on two animalistic legs half obscured by an ethereal robe melding perfectly with its torso and looms over the siblings, casting no shadow. If anything, its body is so dark that the light seems to bend around it. Eight, brilliant white eyes open in a faceless head and blink slowly, one pair after another. The Abyssal horror, blacker than anything existing in this world, composed of Void in its purest form and shape, barely fits in this cave but doesn't seem to care. It watches both the Void born creature and the half-spider for a couple seconds before its numerous eyes crinkle in something resembling a smile.

. . . S a f e . . .

The Void rumbles satisfied. Carefully, the giant lays something beside them - a small, pale mask split in two - and begins to focus. In barely half a minute, the dark menace shrinks and loses its intimidating shape once more in favor of sliding into the cracked shell, reforming a tiny body in a dark grey cloak tattered from long travels. As though it was the most natural thing in the world, the Ghost of Hallownest picks up the other half of their mask and as the last bits of their true form compress within their broken head they lift the missing piece and without any effort mend the crack that used to run through the middle of their face, leaving but a faint scar behind. This form was way too small, they could feel the Void pressing against it from the inside uncomfortably but for now it will have to do. Though, they liked this body and were very used to it. Maybe they could just make it grow properly in the near future?

With that transformation done, the warmth returns to the cavern. Casually, Ghost shuffles closer to their last remaining siblings and - mindful of numerous recently healed wounds Hollow bears - cuddles against Hornet's side next to Hollow's arm, careful not to wake up either of their siblings in the process. Especially Hollow. They need their rest the most. Actually, it's new to see Hornet of all people peacefully sleeping with the Hollow Knight's head on her lap. All of the sudden she seemed far less scary than the little vessel found her during their first meeting in Greenpath, though that may have something to do with their newfound Godhood. With a quiet sigh, Ghost lets their eyes slip closed but doesn't fall asleep. Their Ascension, although it brought unthinkable power that let them tear apart the Goddess of Dreams, left them utterly spent. Rooting out the Infection was not an evening stroll... But they have no desire to sleep. Not yet. For now, they're content with listening to breaths and heartbeats of their siblings. After cutting their way through the entire Pantheon of Hallownest in order to save this land, to save their lost twin, they feel like they've earned this moment of respite. Woe be upon any who thinks otherwise.. Eventually however, even the God of Gods gives into their exhaustion and falls into a deep slumber beside their siblings, knowing both of them are safe. Hallownest is safe. They all are..

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First try at drawing a proper background! Woo! Before you ask, I didn't give Ghost a shadow on purpose, I'm not that oblivious XD

[alittlefrenchtree]

Hiii, it's me again! I actually want to quickly move forward in my reading and not fall behind with notes. Because it makes less sense to write them if I already know what's going on 7 chapters ahead. So let's get started.

SPOILERS DUNE BOOK II : MUAD'DIB (Chapters 5-9)

Chapter 5:

*happy sigh 😌😌😌*

(learn silence, people. It's important.)

You already know how much I love this litany and if there's more in it, I'd be delighted.

Ok, I actually have a nerdy not really funny story about moving dunes. When the worm pops a bit later, Paul describes it at mound-in-motion and there's actually some truth about that. I've recently read an article (and I want to read more about it) about dunes and some scientist thinking that dunes are moving and communicating with each other (in their own mineral, sandy way of course). It sounds fascinating so I let you know if I learn more stuff more or less related to Dune.

This both hurt and feels relatable somehow, even if I don't know how exactly. I like the idea of things approaching from a different angle, of Paul being the only motionless point in a world that keeps spinning around him. The key then wouldn't be to change the world or even to do anything but only to adjust his own position in the universe so he ends up what he meant to be. And the sentence is pretty. The vision appeared to have shifted and approached him from a different angle while he remained motionless.

I still wonder how it works though. The visions and their changes. Do they significantly shift every time he comes close to death? Or say the litany of fear and survive? Or is it more realistic, the smallest details and decisions becoming the biggest changes? I wish Duncan would have been there with them and yet I like this journey through sand and survival just between Paul and Jessica. He probably would have been killed soon after anyway. Unless he's not really dead. Ok, moving on.

Remember when I said that Paul could have/find a way to control sand worms? And now he's saying this:

There are a lot of cues in these few chapters about worms, about riding (or whatever it's called) them with the hooks, about how they're in all likelihood the ones creating the Spice? That's why they're called makers? And that's what the Fremen who died with Hawat was about to called them? I kind of hope there is more to it though, other than only being respected because they're making the spice. There is another quote at the end of the chapter that intrigued me about the relation between Paul and the worms:

He looked at his hand. How inadequate it appeared when measured against such creatures as that worm.

I really like this chapter a lot. Firstly because I love scenes with only two characters so this is delicious for me. Secondly, I love reading about walks through endless lands with nothing but nature, so double yummy. Thirdly, there is a lot of informations. About the worms, and about how Paul is evolving in the desert. There is the rescue of his Mom but, even more importantly, how he rescues the pack. I think it's a very important scene both literally and metaphorically. It doesn't seem like an important scene but it really is in the building of the Paul's character. I hope to see it address in some way in the movie. Because not only he uses the Spice for another purpose than money and getting stronger or smarter or higher, but he uses it to take back what's necessary for his survival in the desert. If that's not adapting to Dune, I don't know what it is.

Chapter 6:

This is going to cause some trouble at some point, isn't it? Halleck and his people teaming up with smugglers, thinking the Atreides are dead. He's going to end up fighting against them without knowing it, right? 😔

Chapter 7:

Moooom, I love him so much 😭😭😭

But, I hate not knowing what's going on exactly and I hate it even more when it's about Paul and Paul's power so we're all going to sit here together, read this again and again util we've rambled enough to come up with AT LEAST five theories about something.

Like why. Why does he cross a time barrier at this precise moment? How does it work? He came close to death again so has he defeated another timeline where he was supposed to die? Hence the unknown territory, the darkness? Or are there defined blindspots? Around the worms maybe? Because of their spice maker job? Or is he just exploring and developing his new abilities? Learning to not rely only on his inner eye but on all of his powers and abilities? I need answers. I need to finish reading this book (books) and reading the theories of someone who's been thinking about every detail of them for the past 50 years.

I really liked this couple of chapters about Paul and Jessica's journey through the desert. You can really see Paul coming to terms with it. Fighting it, using it, accepting it, welcoming it. Seeing its beauty and his future in it. I'm looking forward this symbiosis. It looks beautiful.

Chapitre 8:

Ok, that was painful. Firstly, because I wasn't expecting to see Kynes die at this moment and secondly, because it was a very slow agony to witness. To be honest, I'm getting a bit tired to see characters die? It denies so much of the potential for characters development and for relationships development. The lack of it is going to become a bit sad for the whole story.

And it's heartbreaking to understand that Liet gave up his only chance of survival to save Paul and Jessica. I don't know how much he knew before, if he already knew he was going to die or if he thought he had a real chance but it's going to give so much power to Paul with the Fremen? If it becomes known that Liet died to save him and his mother, believing in them.

I supposed there is some kind of parallel to see here, between the previous chapter and this one, with Paul practically arising from the desert and Liet dying in it at the same time/shortly after? Like how Paul is supposed to take Liet's position of influence with the Fremen?

The chapter is also heavy on... social/political/ecological talks. Or one-sided conversation since the other side is dying. Not saying they shouldn't be there since they are the actual themes of the book but maybe it could have been made in a more natural way? Or not all at once?

But it made me think of Caladan. Which I could have done earlier, I agree. But Caladan is the planet of water, right? Water. The very thing Arrakis is lacking of and wants/needs. I would have like to see a bit more of Caladan, actually. How it was. How Paul was on it, actually. If he was as adapted as Caladan's environment than he seems to be to Arrakis'.

Chapter 9:

There it is. Paul as an outcast Duke finally facing Fremen forces for the first time.

This is a good chapter but I think the key point here is this:

I scrolled past a post the other day (without reading it entirely because of fear of spoilers), that was saying how people thinking Dune was about religion hadn't understand it because it was a story about propaganda. But, at the risk of sounding blasphemous and as a non-religious person... Isn't it kind of the same? Religion, propaganda, fandom,... At some point, there was someone with high powers of influence who comes to make people believe in something (whatever it's true, partially true, partially false or entirely false) to make them adopt a specific behavior, most likely a form of submissiveness? (@ tumblr porn bots, i'm not talking about you). What people make of that belief, it's what really matters.

What interested me more here is to consider this in relation to the opening chapter quote.

It's the eternal question with prophecies. Would a prophecy become true even if nobody knew about it or believe in it? Or do people, by acting according to it because they heard and believed it, make it real and effective? Did the Missionaria Protectiva create its own Kwisatz Haderach or would Paul would have been born with the same abilities and the destiny if they hadn't existed?

We see the future isn't set in stone in Paul's visions, but does his actions and decisions influence the shape of the future or is he just bumped from one predefined timeline to another? And are there really that much differences between the two? How many metaphysical questions can you write in one post?

Quick word about Chani before wrapping this one up. I think I'm going to like her? She seems cool at least. I'm not sure about Paul's reaction to her though. Yes, he supposed to be 15 but he's also something like half of a divinity so. *snorts*. Or maybe I'm just every day more tired of seeing romance being put everywhere and romanticized to the point of 99% people still thinking it's the ultimate form of love and relationship and the ultimate thing to achieve in life. OR maybe it's because everybody engaged in a classic couple-relationship immediately lost 12 points of esteem in my eyes. Don't know. Will see. I imagine I have to brace myself for Paul x Chani babies at some point, since it's 1964? If they survive that long. Very not looking forward to it. The babies, not the survival.

Anyway gotta go before I start wishing bad things to hypothetical fictional babies. Tschüss! 🌔💛

[theoutcastedartist]

No new art really, if you've seen my original post on the MHA amino then you know where this is fucking going. Right down to Angstville because for some reason I'm obsessed with hurting my favorite Goth Jesus. You'd think I'd talk about my "Stain's Redemption" AU first since I've mentioned it but hahahaha

Y o u w e r e w r o n g ;´)

I straight up just copied and pasted my original post because I'm lazy but I REALLY wanted to share this with Tumblr lmao

Warning for (potential) manga spoilersss

Alrighty sinners, Let's get to the post itself then. Shall we?

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So let me just address something real quick about how I feel about the latest chapters of the MHA manga:

Seeing Aizawa cry has to be the most heart breaking thing I've seen in MHA (outside of the whole deal with Eri, sweet baby child ;-;)

And I completely FLIPPED when it was revealed that Shirakumo was BASICALLY turned into Kurogiri and just I'M CRYING--Cloud Angel Baby NOOOOOO!!!

They all deserved better than this T-T

Anywho enough about my grieving over fictional characters, let's talk about my AU, inspired by these recent chapters. Note that I'm a terrible writer. I guess this also includes a snippet of what I plan to write for this AU since it transitions from explanation to literature at some point just because I was kinda bored. Imma let you know right now that I'm a shit writer so uuuuh bear with me.

---------

The Reticent AU takes place in an Alternate Universe where Shirakumo is ALIVE and separate from Kurogiri. Instead of Loud Cloud being turned into a Nomu, Eraserhead is turned into one. His appearance for the most part remains the same, minus the scars all over his body, including around the neck, from experimentation.

He barely speaks due to pain he feels when he does talk and has no recollection of his life before being a Nomu, not even his own name. He manages to escape the League of Villains at some point and "befriends" the Hero Killer: Stain, or well more like the other way around (only because I find Stain befriending an emotionless mute to be funny). He finds Stain's views of false hero-hood and admiration for All Might quite contradictory yet amusing and lets him live during their first encounter.

It is rather hard to say whether he is a villain or a vigilante. He'll kill only if necessary but his intentions and motivations are unknown. He despises All Might as the Symbol of Peace. It gives false hope to the people as well as a false sense of security. He found it completely revolting. Aizawa did believe in good people, but All Might isn't one of them in his books. Pretty much considered one only because he's hanging around with Stain.

He never gave himself a name, nor did he care all that much for it, it was Stain who dubbed him with the alias "Reticent", meaning not revealing one's thoughts or feelings readily. He was never one for being open for as long as he could remember.

It's rather fitting, so Reticent keeps the given name.

·············

* I didn't know Shirakumo was tan, not white before I made the art (forgive me)

Oboro Shirakumo A.K.A Loud Cloud is currently the homeroom teacher of our beloved Class 1-A and best friend of our resident screaming banana, Present Mic. They have given up on their dream to start an agency due to the loss of their closest friend from high school. Fifteen years ago when they were still students at UA, Shota Aizawa had gone missing and authorities concluded that he was dead. It was such a heartbreak to Shirakumo and Yamada, that hurt never fully healed.

Shirakumo is still a friendly and nurturing spirit at heart, but not as open with his feelings anymore. He's more reserved with his thoughts and feelings. He's a reticent person.

He takes an instant liking to Ejirou Kirishima and Hitoshi Shinso. Kirishima's friendship with the explosive Katsuki Bakugou reminds him of his friendship with Shota. Their personalities seemed so different, yet their bond had remained solid and strong. As for Shinso, the purple haired teen reminded him of his old friend. He could see the growing potential in these two and takes them both under his wing. The three of them train together outside of school and the Kirishima and Shinso form a close friendship with each other along with their sensei. Both children are like sons to Shirakumo, he thinks that Shota would like them too if he were still here.

·············

So... Izuku Midoriya, the "villain magnet" of class 1-A, ended up finding himself standing face-to-face with the Hero Killer: Stain and... his partner? The news never reported anything on him having a partner. How strange. Either Stain's partner is a very recent addition or this guy was really good at covering his own tracks.

"Stain, leave them be. They are just mere children. Killing them would serve no purpose to your cause. I wouldn't waste your time with Native either. "

Midoriya grimaced at the sore and raspy voice. It sounded painful, but he could hear the underlying threat. The Hero Killer sighed and backed off from Iida's paralyzed body.

The two villains left before Todoroki had arrived.

"I think that's the first time I've ever seen you smile."

Agakuro sat down next to Reticent, who was currently petting a stray cat, and offered him some fruit. The smaller man hummed quietly and took a few slices of apple. Both men sat quietly with the soft purring of the stray.

"I've been meaning to ask, what is your quirk exactly? You can erase quirks, but you can also manipulate basic elements and the blood in people's bodies."

Reticent signed, 'I have more than one.'

"More than one quirk?" Stain cocked an eyebrow.

Reticent nodded and quietly spoke, "Nomu."

"I've heard about their appearances here in Hosu. They are these large looking creatures with their brains exposed. You sure as hell don't look like one of 'em." Agakuro mused as he chewed on some cantaloupe. His friend was making his signals again.

I was suppose to be a more perfected Nomu. All for One took care of my progress himself.'

"Is that why you have so many..."

'Yes.'

·············

"Principal Nezu?" Shirakumo and Yamada stood in the white creature's office. Both men wondering why they were called to see him.

"Ah Loud Cloud and Present Mic! I apologize for pulling you out of your classes, but it seems you both are being called to assist Gran Torino with something he found." Nezu explained. The two men in the room looked at each other confused.

"What does he need us for?"

"Well it seems that they have another one of those Nomus in custody. I think you may remember the name Shota Aizawa?"

·············

Shirakumo was BEYOND annoyed about the situation. It must be a mistake. Their old friend was not some gruesome quirk experiment accompanying the Hero Killer. Shota Aizawa wanted to be a hero, despite feeling that he was inadequate for such due to the nature of his quirk. It has to be a mistake.

"How much longer-"

"Calm down will you! I'm frustrated about this too. There's no way it could be him, but... who knows."

They arrived at the police station withing a few minutes and walk inside. They see Gran Torino standing there waiting for them. They follow him to where Tsukauchi is finishing up with questioning the person inside. Looking through the window, Shirakumo and Yamada's eyes widen with disbelief. The other person looked just like...

"Ah Present Mic, Loud Cloud. Thank you for arriving on such short notice. I know you are both very busy men."

The two Pro-Heros turn to the detective as he stepped out of the interrogation room. Present Mic appeared alarmed and Shirakumo just looked... mad.

"Well it appears that he doesn't remember anything before being experimented on. We have a case of amnesia on our hands."

Shirakumo practically growled,"Experimented on? What the hell are you going on about detective!?" Why was Tsukauchi being so damn vague?

"That man in there is indeed Shota Aizawa. His base quirk of Erasure is still there and DNA results confirm this. From what I'm gathering, fifteen years ago he was kidnapped and had been subjected to illegal drug testing as well as having multiple quirks forced into his body. He's a more sophisticated Nomu it seems."

"More 'sophisticated'? What stopped him from having brains popping out of his skull like all the others we've seen?" The voice hero questioned. Something wasn't adding up here.

"All for One..."

The other three men became tense.

"Isn't... Isn't that the villain All Might fought at Kamino Ward?"

"According to him, it seems that All for One was the one who did this to him personally, there was extra care in your friend's 'recreation'. As to what his added quirks are, we're not sure yet of what they are or even of how many."

Gran Torino turned to the younger men,"We were hoping that you two would talk to him. Maybe to help trigger any memories from before his disappearance."

"So what? You think the 'power of friendship' is going to magically bring back his memories?" Shirakumo scoffed at how ridiculous that would actually be.

"No, but miracles do happen. I've seen many things during my time. They are rare, but they happen."

"Shirakumo," Present Mic started, "if there is even a slim possibility of getting Sho's memories back, shouldn't we at least try? For him?"

Shirakumo sighed at his words, "Fine. For Shota's sake."

The two younger men walk inside.

--------

"Shota?"

'Who were they talking about? Is that his name?'

After the detective had left the room, two other men had walked in. He assumed they were Pros based on the costumes. No normal person dressed in THAT much leather (referring to Present Mic).

"Do you... remember us, Shota? Hizashi and I?"

It looks like they ARE talking to him. He shook his head no. This was the first time he has seen these two men. The way they were looking at him made him uncomfortable.

"Sho...ta? Is... that my name?"

The two men standing winced at his croaking voice. In all honesty, he would sign, but he had no clue if these two even knew sign language. So he just resorted to talking.

"Do you remember your own name?"

"No."

"Do you... remember us?"

The raven haired man shook his head, 'No.'

"Is... Shota my name? Do you know me? I'm sorry I- I'm just... so confused."

His voice was so raspy and weak. Black hair covered the scar under his eye. Hizashi and Oboro wore sad looks on their faces at the sound. The taller of the two, Oboro, knelt down by the man's knees.

"Yes. We do know you. Your name is Shota Aizawa. You were once a member of UA's class 2-A about fifteen years ago." Oboro started as he gently pried one of Shota's hands from the yellow blanket the officers gave him. His arm was covered in scars... like his legs. God only knows what they did to him all those years. Hizashi just observed their movements, unsure of what to do he added on to what Shirakumo said.

"You love cats and taking naps, you were the most rational one out of the three of us. All three of us had dreams of starting an agency together..."

The two pro-heros continued talking for what felt like hours. Shota listened to every word as they recounted their old adventures from highschool. Maybe with enough luck, they could help Shota get him memory back. Shirakumo was starting to think that the raven wasn't ever getting his old memories back until...

"Sushi... I- We had a cat named Sushi?"

Hizashi had flung himself so fast to Shota as he held onto him tightly and cried. Shirakumo also had a tear-streaked face, but he held a blinding smile as he watched Shota awkwardly pat the blond's back.

Miracles do happen.

More of this angst shit coming soon ;)

[lokaneiscanon]

Mighty Thor in Thor: Love and Thunder rant

Seeing Natalie Portman returning to reprise her role as Jane Foster, nevertheless wielding Mjolnir, finally getting the treatment this character deserves, was surreal to say the least. I had just started reading Lords of Midgard, the 8th issue of Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018), and had fallen in love already. But I didn't suspect at all that Taika Waititi would pull this card in Thor: Love and Thunder, considering Jane was barely mentioned in Ragnarok. The news about my favorite actress portraying one of my favorite characters coming out of the blue - you can imagine the excitement. Alas, I quickly remembered what the fandom thought of that comic (at least on tumblr) and imagined it now growing tenfold, cuz not everyone in the MCU fandom reads comics but pretty much everyone wants to watch another Thor movie. And yes, many fans weren't ready for this step, still recovering from Sam Wilson getting the shield in Endgame. Which is completely fine. We're not obligated to like everything Marvel throws in our faces, we're allowed to criticize and express our opinion on the internet or wherever. What is not okay is mindlessly hating, and even worse - using false facts to support said opinion.

I have seen some people using the argument that it is one of Marvel's worst selling comics. Which has already been proven wrong by multiple sites, including Comichron, just Google it, as I did myself. I read multiple posts, ones saying how good Jane is doing as Thor in sales, others disproving this, so I checked for myself the numbers at the site mentioned above month by month to be sure. The comic truly had its downfalls as the story progressed but in my opinion it's normal for the 1st issue to have more sales than the 21st. If we compare it to Unworthy Thor, which started running a bit later and followed the now unworthy Odinson, the data shows the latter had more sales. But then again, while Might Thor was at its 17th issue, Unworthy Thor was at its 2nd. Also, they later crossed paths, shared comic issues, it's fair to say they go hand in hand and Jason Aaron, the author, probably doesn't want us to compare them, as they complete and compliment each other's stories. Still I decided to check the comic that made Thor unworthy in the first place - Thor: God of Thunder (2012 - 2014), which seemed to me more "comparable" to Might Thor (2015 - 2018). *I keep putting the years it was being released so as to not be confused with previous Mighty Thor issues, whole Odinson was still Thor, please bear with me* So yes, the numbers were pretty close, but from what I saw, Mighty Thor had the upper hand if we compare first issue to first issue and so on. (In defense of Odinson, we have to take into account that this data is only from the US and does not include digital sales. Also, he's been around since the 50s. We could argue Jane was a breath of fresh air that some Marvel fans were indeed ready for. As a non-American, and also a person without a hint of knowledge in economics I cannot take into account inflation and whatever else has prevented or enabled Americans to get their hands on the comics or has affected prizes through the years. Bear that in mind.) Moreover, from what I saw on Comichron, both comics had much competition - God of thunder was released along with Avengers vs the X-men, the Uncanny X-men, pretty popular at the time, and the Goddess of Thunder faced Civil War 2 and DC Universe Rebirth (yes, DC is in the game too), also dominating with tremendous sales for the longest time. Yet I stick with my original statement - both Thors are valid and shouldn't be put against one another regardless of profit. Because at the end of the day what will matter the most is the story. And boy, what a story it is.

Now, I haven't read the Thor: God of Thunder, but as I was doing research I found one very well written summary and explanation of Thor's arc and his becoming unworthy and I will post a link below, because I honestly feel I wouldn't be doing this comic a favor by describing it without having read it. Which I plan to do in the future, tbh. It's a fantastic prelude to the Mighty Thor (2015 - 2018) that I've come to love. First, I'd like to ask you all to stop hating on the comic without having read it first. It doesn't make any sense and being petty for the sake of being petty won't benefit neither you, nor anyone, really. Now, about the comic itself - the art is magnificent. It's just gorgeous. Mighty Thor isn't , thank all the gods, sexualized, she is pretty buffed and generally looks like a warrior. As it is with the other characters, I dare say. The background truly captures the essence of every world Jane finds herself on. Action scenes are just the right amount and balanced with dialogue well. On a side note, it's pretty funny to read/listen to in your head the Shakespearean English cursive in which Jane talks as Thor. The plot line branches beyond this comic, starting from Thor: God of Thunder and leading to the War of Realms. And it is elaborately built in every issue. You don't know what to expect, yet it makes sense when it happens. Which leads me to the characterizations. My God, what a treat Loki is in this. Clearly, my opinion is kinda biased, since he's my favorite character, but you never know which side he's on. What his motivations are. And it just feels so... Loki. His writing is brilliant. Almost makes me forget what the MCU did to him. Also, he gets some daddy time with Laufey (not as kinky as I make it sound). Frigga/Freyja is just as awesome as in the MCU, even more, at least in the comics she calls Odin out on his shit, who btw is I guess an asshole in every version and universe. Malekith, the main villain, is unbearably despicable, I want to tear every page he is on. He really was mishandled in the Dark World, if you want some true action with the dark elves, you are welcome to enjoy. I saved the best for the end - Jane Foster/ Might Thor. Now, if you think Dr. Foster spends her time boasting about her worthiness and how Odinson is just called Thor, but she is Mighty Thor, you are horribly wrong. She just... does her job. Because the hammer chose her. Because there's no one else to do so. That's it. If you think there's some feminism involved, yes, there sure is, but it certainly isn't the reason Jane became Thor in the first place. It was not the creators going SJW because it's trendy, as such a mindset is honestly offensive to any descent creator with any self respect, but a well thought out story arc, which, I repeat, you have to read the comic to understand. Jane is not at all whiny about the hate she gets in-universe, not only from foes like Odin and who-not, but from Shield and generally people whose asses she's saving. Her having cancer is not something they pulled to provoke sympathy and make her look like a victim - on the contrary, she is a damn hero and a victor. I don't want to give out spoilers, but her being Thor is actually a giant sacrifice that no one really appreciates (both in-universe and in the fandom). She is not Thor to prove she can be, or just to prove "women can be heroes" - she doesn't have to. She is simply needed by the realms and so she does her job, even though she is called a thief, persecuted and generally hated. All that matters is that the hammer finds her worthy - the beauty and simplicity of that fact you will find out, for the last time, if you read the comic.

I'm not making you read the comic or watch Thor: Love and Thunder. I myself don't know what to make of this film yet because there's barely any information about it. I only know it will be based on the comic so that's a reason for my hopes to be up already. On the other hand, since I didn't like Loki's characterization in Ragnarok, I'm not sure what to expect from Taika. There are valid reasons to not like the idea of Jane returning to the MCU as Thor, which you are entitled to. However, reasons such as "why does everything have to be political these days" are not. Because if I had to make a list of everything politically related in the MCU, it would take forever. Steve Rogers kills nazis is the most blatant example. Make of it what you want. But I think we're far enough into the 21st century to realize art and real life are not that separable. It's undeniable that art affects people and that is to say, people everywhere. And they all have different opinions and aren't gonna like everything media is offering to them. And I wish I could simply tell you not to watch the movie but I'm a Marvel fan too and I understand that I can't just take away Thor from you because I want Mighty Thor as well. But none of us can stop Marvel from producing it. So, to quote an image I saw recently, I don't know how to explain to you that you should care about other people. Let the rest of the fandom enjoy what they want to enjoy. Yes, ik I can play around with the tags and avoid posts that unnerve me but, for example, I'm looking up Mighty Thor fanart, which obviously isn't anti-Mighty Thor, yet I get attacked in the comics for anticipating a movie that doesn't even have a full cast yet. Ik I'm not asking for too much when I wish to get the same internet experience (not only tumblr, but also insta, YouTube, Twitter, any site) as the Thor Odison fans, for example. I'm aware I cannot stop all the toxic fans and the trolls but I hope this post has inspired those of you who simply can't envision Jane as Thor, or don't like Natalie Portman in the role, or whatever eles personal preference that doesn't involve political issues and isn't harmful to the community, not to attack every post on your dash with hate. The movie is called LOVE and Thunder, for God's sake. (on a side note, is a franchise that is too afraid to show LGBT characters for more than 1 minute so as to not lose profit from China, THAT politically correct)

Anyway, that was a veeeery long rant, sorry to whoever reads this but, like, please, I put effort into this, hoping this time around I won't be the only positive reviewer of a movie, like I was with Solo: a Star Wars story (yes, I'm still bitter about this), which was boycotted for no apparent reason but was a decent film in reality, and I'm only bringing it up because it has a similar experience to Love and Thunder for getting hate before even being released. I'm not defending a billion dollar company that flopped in box office once, I'm defending the viewer's right to media they are interested in. If you don't like the character, remember - that's your opinion, not a fact that the character sucks. Kudos.

Not very easy to navigate, I advice you to do the research month by month individually for comics you'd like to compare. Also, if you happen to find more reliable data, pls say so in the comments.

Here you have the summary and explanation of the greatness of Thor: God of Thunder, Jesus, I'll go bankrupt if I buy this one too.

Yes, I want to end the sales dispute once and for all, I'm tired of seeing it on my dash. This guy probably explains it better than I did.

@awesomejenlawrence you said you'd like to read this and I delivered