#<-ignoring how thats how my last situationship started...

[literatureisdying]

need to develop a crush on someone but everyone at my school is either straight or not masc </3

[moonshynecybin]

Do you think the ranch visit 2014 ended with like slightly annoyed sex because Vale just annoyed with Marc beating his record but also slightly admiring him

i love this because its true. marc is ANNOYING ! of course it cannot be ignored that vale is ALSO annoying (max biaggi fight. hello.) like they match each others freak in that regard, but at what point do you look at this sexy ass twink who is obsessed with your dick and your bike (sex to vale. is motorcycle racing lest we forget he keeps that m1 in GROPING distance and marc is like GOD i wish that were me so it does. work comma sexually. for them. like a lot. but i digress) and obsessed with your ability to ride it and be like hmm. maybe this habit is NOT so cute. when beforeeee you thought hey hes just like MEEEEE and got HORNY about it. well obviously if youre vale it is when he doesnt let you win at your own goddamn track at your own goddamn house in front of your own goddamn brother and various peers. that shit is irritating. which i do think marc realizes now, but is also largely unrepentant about because he's hilarious. free my girl he did all that but it was funny. our marc not famous for his wealth of tact and restraint on the track. and vale is thirty six staring down one last chance to maybe win his tenth. and earlier that week when he beat marc at that karting event he said finally somewhere you dont win. so yeah when marc doesnt roll over and let him get the lap record that day in 2014 all of those endearing traits where they overlap and are similar. change. morph. arent so cute anymore. the light shifts. the music hits a minor chord. ominous. foreshadowing. chekov's gun carefully being placed on the wall. and suddenly. kind of a theme with them huh. vale hates him for all the things he learned from vale.

so. we are here to ask how that emotion translates to nasty sex. obviously. like all of these complex emotions do NOT mean that vale does not want to get his dick sucked lmao. like he's here he's thirsty marc's been in a tiny little titty huggin black tshirt all day its happenin. AND. it should be noted that in a very real sense this is their first sleepover. first time fr hanging out outside the paddock in a place where there is PRIVACY. no real REPORTERS. an actual locking DOOR. no way to hide from the fact that theyve been all over each other for like TWO YEARS now. AND multiple yamaha M1S that can be used as somewhat SEXUAL PROPS. (vale feeling also perhaps. emotionally complex here. a lil delicate. like YEAH i can invite my coworkers i like to hang at my track thats bro stuff but what about my years long situationship that —*static noises in vale's brain* like remember this is where MARC thinks things start to change between them...)

so yeah vale ends up like. amping up that competitive edge a little in bed. making this a fuckbuddy thing more than a RELATIONSHIP thing as much as he can in his head and with his hands and failing miserably and feeling even WEIRDER about that. so he's. i think he's working hard at putting marc where he wants him. hot hands a little rougher on the curve of marc's waist. cupping his ass making him gasp. sending him to his knees and making him suck his dick hot and nasty. teasing a little edging on the little feminine nicknames theyve never talked about but that make marc squirm and flush prettily. edging marc with three fingers in his ass while he whines for it. dragging it out. exerting a little control. not mean at all everyone is having fun (marc. out of his MIND.) just. excising some tension. its probably nothing hes just in his head. holding marc in his hands as he looks up at him. and marc trusting it. marc going. marc being just where vale wants him. just like he never does on the track. and marc thinks everything is fine when its happening thinks everything is AMAZING. but after that is when vale starts to go a little cold......

[shinycollarboneapologist]

style

warnings: 18+ MINORS DNI... also never take driving lessons from matty. 

(an: this was supposed to be a short blurb with no smut, but i couldn't help myself. also this is my first time actually writing smut so be nice or i’ll cry myself to sleep.)

“well this isn’t conspicuous at all,” the breathless laugh that falls from your lips is enough to almost make matty lift his foot from the brake and send the rented, red convertible into your friend’s perfectly manicured garden, “at least you turned the headlights off.”

“at least i turned the headlights off,” he echoes into the darkness. there’s remnants of a sly smirk on his lips. you’re dizzy at the way his eyes are tracing over your body as it’s perched at the driver’s side; hands holding onto the cool metal of the car and you’re just barely leaning in. its enough that you can smell the aftershave and cigarettes; a combination that leaves your mouth watering. you would have been a fool to ignore his late night text, no matter how much your friends warned you to. he’s only in town for a few more days. and despite the way you’re acting now, you’ve done a pretty good job at pretending he doesn’t exist.

the luminesence from the moon and the warm street lights are painting you in the most beautiful light. he almost wants to look away from your blinding beauty. almost. he can’t. it had been awhile since he had seen you, mostly due to his own veteran slew of excuses, and he wants to take in every last drop of you. he knows that he’s dodged calls and sent one word replies to your texts, purposefully avoided places he knew you would be. but you hadn’t been an angel either. he vaguely remembers the documented nights out detailed in photographs of you leaving clubs with randoms, and the infamous “they’re busy” text he had recieved after pouring out his heart and soul to you in one-hundred and fourty characters the other day. it had felt like a direct dagger to his heart. but he deserves it. he’s not innocent and neither are you in this back and forth seesaw of a situationship you’ve both gotten yourself into. there are so many questions that are perched at the tip of your tongue. you don’t utter them though. 

he watches you carefully as you make your way to the passenger’s side. it feels like ages until you’re sat in the seat next to him. and now its his turn to feel dizzy. your perfume is wafting through his nose, the sorry excuse of a skirt is riding up your thigh. he feels drunk, all of his movements feel like liquid. his white t-shirt is feeling unbearably tight around his neck. his whole world seems like its on pause, and the only thing he can do is swallow thickly and stare you down.

and maybe thats the reason why you shoot him a laugh and a raised eyebrow, “need driving lessons?” you’re eager and he likes that. 

his own eyes narrow as they bore into yours, a pregnant pause before you have to tear your eyes away from the intensity of his stare. his eyes are dark and clouded with something you can’t quite put your finger on. its too much. in truth, you could get lost in his eyes and there’s been many a time that you have. now isn’t the time for that though as he’s speeding off to the spot the two of you have frequented so many times before. 

you’ve seen the pictures. you know about the other girls and the many escapades he’s had since the last time you’ve been together. the thought alone has sent you into a tizzy multiple times. you want to ask him about it, want to pick his brain. however, you don’t want to ruin the moment by opening a can of worms you can’t reseal. you know he knows about you’re own flings. and maybe that fact alone is why you have to keep telling yourself that this is wrong.

this is wrong, you keep trying to remind yourself. but your fleeting thoughts are so much as moot whilst his calloused fingers seek solace on the skin of your exposed thigh. it starts out quite innocent, tracing patterns on the skin. they climb higher, and higher, though and there’s no way that he means anything innocent by his actions. you know he doesn’t want to talk. a gasp tumbles from your already parted lips as his nimble fingers push past the hem of your skirt. 

his eyes meet yours, chocolate brown pleading for a moment, asking for your consent. its unspoken, but you nod, a bit too eagerly for your liking. eyes back to the road and matty’s pushing the flimsy material of your panties to the side, letting his fingers tease up and down your slit. your skin feels like its on fire, the wind whipping past you is the only thing that can attempt to cool you down at this point. you’re on fire and he’s doing nothing to satiate it. the rough pads of his fingers rub slow, tender circles at your clit, your breath catching in your throat. your eyes are boring into his side-profile now, soft whines falling from your lips. he’s still circling slow, and there’s no sight of relief in sight.

“matty,” you whimper out, “please.” 

you think he’s ignoring you at this point to fuel his own selfish desire of teasing you to the point of no return, but the way his unoccupied hand grips on the steering wheel sends a chill down your spine. this is dangerous. he knows it, you know it. there’s nothing covering up the filthy melody he’s playing between your legs as he’s zipping the rented convertible through the streets. he’s supposed to be focused on the road, but the way you’re whimpering and whining next to him has his jaw going slack. that’s when he gives in. he slips a finger in, languidly, in a way that has your head rolling back against the tan head rest. his thumb assumes its position on your clit and he’s working a sweet, sinful rhythm against you. his own lips are parted, puffy from all of the biting, and his fingers are moving in tandem with each other. 

“feeling good over there?” he breaks up the hushed sounds of your moans with his words. his voice is husky, laced with lust and need. “because the view from here is phenomenal. you’re taking it so well, baby.” 

the sound of his voice makes you mewl, hips bucking into the fluid motions of his fingers. “you’re.... you’re supposed to be watching the road, matty. fuck.” 

your attempt at scolding him wavers with a moan of his name. he’s slipped another finger into you, smugly of course, and watching as your lips curl around the syllables of his name. you’re practially chanting it as if its the only word you know at this point. the fire is burning deep within you. you’re thankful that its late and that this road is desolate, because had anyone seen the way you were thrashing and moaning and bucking into him, you know it would be on the front page of some tabloid and a trending topic on twitter come the morning. 

not that you would really care, anyway. because in reality, all you can think about is the delicious way his fingers are moving inside of you. he’s playing you like a song he’s written on his guitar, pulling moans from you as if they’re his very own carefully orchestrated and sinful melody. his fingers are pushing inside of you at a deafening pace, almost as if he knows just how close you are. just how bad you need it. 

“looking so pretty when you take my fingers like this. sound so sweet, too,” he’s moaning out to you as the car rolls to a stop at a red light. matty’s quick to lean over, pressing a chaste kiss to your lips. you can’t help yourself from getting lost in the kiss, teeth and tongues clashing against each other, moans lost between the two of you. you practically whimper as he pulls away to set the car in motion again. you know what awaits you at the destination, but he’s sat next to you looking like that and touching you like this and its all too much. 

that’s when you feel it. the promise of sweet release rising in the pit of your stomach. his name falls in caution from your lips, warning him of the sapid end you’re about to reach. but you know he knows your body better than that. he was probably anticipating it. you hear a deep groan in the air between you two, over the low hum of some top fourty hit on the radio. 

“you wanna come, darling?” 

“please, i need it. i need it so bad,” you could cry. in fact, you might be crying. you’re not even sure anymore, all you can think about is the feeling of his fingers and the sweet release that’s on the cusp of the horizon. 

“go on. come. come for me. want you to come for me,” you can barely hear his voice over the roar of the engine, but you feel his eyes lock on you every second or so. the band breaks and you’re writhing in the seat next to him, moaning out his name in a sharp cry. he fucks you through it, fingers still working you until you’re basically pushing his hand away from the intensity of it all. you’re limp in the seat next to him, letting out a low moan as you watch matty brings one of his fingers to his lips. the sinful pop of his lips smacking against his finger drives you mad, alluding to the many of nights he’s spent with his head buried between your thighs.

he sucks his finger clean before he’s holding the other out to your own lips, tapping gently. you immediately invite the digit into your mouth, cleaning off the tangy taste of you from his skin. your cheeks hallow around his flesh and you’re moaning at the taste. your show is well received by the man sat next to you, as you hear his groans. you always knew how to put on a show for him. he’s watching you again, eyes wild with desire.

your chest is rising and falling at a rapid rate, vision a little hazy as you slowly come back down from the matty-induced high. he’s clicked the engine off and you realize the car is parked in the back of a parking lot. the both of you’s usual spot for nights like this. his eyes are on you, like a predator watching their prey, darkened and piercing into you. 

there’s a moment before he speaks, and you’re half wondering if he’s going to bring up your own not-so-innocent escapades. he didn’t bring you here to talk though. he never does.

“you’ve made a mess of the seat, so so dirty,” he tsks, unclipping his seatbelt and looming over you, “whatever am i going to do with you?”

and with a sly smirk, mirroring his own, you hum out, “i can think of a few ideas.” 

you’re pulled into the back of the car quicker than you can even catch your breath. his lips are on yours, on your neck, your jaw- any inch of skin that you bare to him. he’s nipping and sucking welts into your flesh, marks you know you’re going to have to conceal tomorrow.

“i’ve … i’ve heard things,” you whisper out, finally, as he begins his descent down your body, fingers pushing up on your shirt to expose more skin that he hasn’t yet claimed. its easier to talk about this when you can’t see his face.

“i know,” he murmurs against you, teeth nipping at the sensitive skin of your stomach. you shudder at his advances. “and they’re true, but i just… can’t stop thinking about you.”

he’s between your legs now, pushing up the flimsy skirt and pulling the thin material of your panties down. he makes quick work of stuffing them into the pocket of his jeans and he’s gazing up at you, big brown eyes pouring into yours. he’s ready to kneel at the altar that is your hips and beg for forgiveness the best way he knows how.

and how are you to deny him when you’ve been there too a few times?

[melancholycatastrophe]

Only Friends Ep. 5 Thoughts

spoilers

not even two minutes in and someone is trying to kill ray, its not looking good out here

nick interrupting the raysand handjob is so wild because sandnick knows that top cheated on mew and they know mew and ray are friends and theyre just not gonna say anything to ray, thats crazy

the raysand and topmew dates are so cute i just know this isn't gonna last

sidenote: that wasn't actually topmew being cute, it was forcebook. the only way i can keep myself sane is by pretending its just forcebook

sand dressed the way i want to dress im going insane he's my favorite kind of boy: guitar player, rock and indie fan, leather jackets, anger issues, homoerotic tension with men - if ray doesn't want him I'll keep him

NOOOO MEW NOT THE GLASSES

top fixing mew's glasses 😭 he's too fine to be such a scumbag

mew's prescription is -5.00, he's just like me fr

am i tripping or is mew now hyperaware of every time top talks to another man because he thinks that they're all ex-hookups or top might hook up with them after? like what was that look when the server gave top the bill?

IS THIS BITCH--? IS NICK CHANGING THE WAY HE DRESSES AND GOING TO THE GYM IN ORDER TO LOOK MORE LIKE TOP AND GET BOSTON'S ATTENTION????? BOY STAND UP PLEASE DONT BE LIKE TOP PLEASE

bostonnick in the pool just reminded me of that one kinnporsche pool scene im sorry i was hoping they would have sex in the pool

also -- diversity win! the lying backstabbing guy who is playing with your feelings and ruining his friendgroup believes in safe sex!

another thing that intrigues me: does boston even like his friends? cuz we've seen all four of them together and having fun, and they look to get along well if you ignore everything happening in the background, but individually? has boston hung out with or just simply had a normal convo with anyone? mew has with ray and cheum, and im starting to believe that boston hates mew for something that happened in the past or is really jealous, but does he hang out ray and cheum just one on one? because at this point it feels like the only person boston talks to is nick, which is.... idk I'm just so curious as to how the raymewbostoncheum friend group came to be

also the fact that he's not even interested in the hostel. the only people we've seen truly working on it are mew and cheum, mew possibly because if it fails he loses his place as top student, idk why but cheum is a business major so she probably has some vested interest in this project. i'm assuming ray is a buisness major because of his dad and even tho it's technically his project - as boston points out - i doubt he wants to work in that field

"I don't want to sleep around anymore. I want to have sex with someone I can talk to and be affectionate with" boston the word you are looking for is boyfriend. you want a boyfriend, and nick is right there (for some reason)

instead of being called only friends, this show should be called "getting cockblocked by all your friends" because this is getting ridiculous. first raysand, then raysand again, then bostonnick, and then raysand again

the way mew wants his friends to be in serious relationships is soo......cute, but also funny that he's over here rooting for his friends meanwhile he keeps top in a situationship like bestie look in the mirror

also i will chew on concrete if boston only dislikes mew because of top oh my god its never that serious over dick

ray please stop talking to that girl omg summer is too pretty to be involved in whatever the fuck you and your friends have going on, give her to me

that concert scene makes me miss brightwin idk

atp I'm gonna assume that every guy who looks at top has fucked him unless proven otherwise cuz this is getting ridiculous

ah fuck....mew has fallen for top..... but anyway this confirms mew is probs demiromantic and demisexual

not the debt collectors 😭 is it really a rich x poor storyline if there's no debt collectors?

sand's mom owns....the go go club....i'm.....oh my god thats why he was there in episode like 2

ray singing sand a love song for his birthday oh be still my beating heart

not mew calling boston to tell him that he's ready to have sex with top 😭 bestie i get that he's your friend with the most sexual experience and you dont want to tell ray cuz he had feelings for you but oh my god why did you tell ton??????

but also "I'm afraid if I don't have sex with Top he'll get bored of me" after seeing so many people check out Top that day.....Mew is finally at a point where he has romantic feelings for Top and its probably for the first time ever and he doesn't want to let him go so he'll have sex with him, he's so real honestly I relate to him a stupid amount

also...okay wait....so is the friendship between bostonmew one-sided or is top truly the reason why their friendship will crumble in the future? cuz mew calls boston about top for reassurance and boston reassures him for some reason....

out of context topmew is cute.....oh their break up is gonna be awful

their first time having sex was so sweet and tender but i know damn well this wont last

ray and his mommy issues back at it again

sand distracting ray from drinking more by sharing personal details about his life....oh......oh....

sand was named after the place his mom and dad had sex oh my god....

ray's mom 🤝 ray

suicidal and alcohol addicts

"Only Cockblocked By Your Friends" the series strikes again!!!

it just hit me that they're eating weed cookies.....

also... "sand, this isnt your usual stuff?" does this mean sand sold ton drugs before or....?

ray keeps saying he and sand aren't dating and its breaking both mine and sand's heart

bostonnick and raysand drinking and partying together doesnt sit right in my heart....somehow someone is gonna say something bad while high

"even if you really like ray, i doubt it would work out between you two" whelp there it is

boston for the love of god shut the fuck up so we can have happy raysand and topmew please stop telling everyone and their mother that ray is in love with mew so that he can move on oh my god please its only episode 5 i need some happy moments between the two couples a little longer please

why is ton airing out all of ray's dirty laundry why is he doing the things that he does he's so messy i love it

well......ray and boston are probably not friends anymore

boston is too fine to be acting like this

now that I'm thinking about it....were boston and ray ever friends or were they just in the same friend group? cuz back in like episode one he was the one who was supposed to take care of ray when he was drunk and didn't so, like....

that last scene with sandray is sad and all but I'm too distracted over the fact that they're sleeping without blankets covering them

WAS THAT RAYMEW FIGHTING IN THE PREVIEW NO I CAN TAKE EVERYTHING BUT RAYMEW FIGHTING STOP DONT DO THIS TO ME

[shroomgal]

Were we really soul tied or was it just limerence?

This is based off of my own research and experience.

About three years ago i matched with this guy on tinder. He wasn't particularly striking. White, shaggy dark brown hair, big nerdy glasses and brown eyes that caught me off guard a little. I swiped right and we matched instantaneously. We talked here and there for about two weeks, sending selfies back and forth, playing the weird game that is snapchat, which is so fucking normalized for whatever reason. (like really, why are we sending blank photos of to each other with no context or conversation ??) Anyways, two weeks in was when the situationship started. A situationship is the stage between friends with benefits and a relationship. Situationships can feel like limbo, never knowing if it will surpass where its currently at. I was drunk at a club, shaking my ass to the latest 2021 trap hits. He asks me to hookup, and I honestly just needed the validation. My friend drives me 15 minutes to his place, where I meet him in his big white range rover in the parking garage of his apartment building. From there, he tells me I'm beautiful in person. I've always had a soft spot for that word. Beautiful. I didn't hear it about myself too often. When he said it, it felt true. And genuine. We had sex.

I started talking to him daily through our snapchats, enamored by our first night together. He would come over, we would hang out, smoke, fuck, watch tv, be human. I developed a bond with him where I felt comfortable in my own skin. I felt comfortable to show him parts of my personality other people didn't normally see. The obsession grew. He took me to a smoothie shop this one time, we held hands. I thought for sure he was my next boyfriend, maybe even my last if I played my cards right. I envisioned a life with him, where I was comfortable, and happy, and me.

One day, after a month of us hanging out, he cancelled on me. Then he cancelled again. Eventually he just stopped responding to me via snapchat. I knew I was getting ghosted, but it was more heart wrenching this time. It was like he was squeezing my heart into knots, watching the blood pour out. When I found out it was because there was someone else, that hurt even more. When I saw he had superliked my best friend on tinder, thats when a part of me crumbled.

On and off these memories of us floated around in my head. This perfect thing that had suddenly vanished, and at that, he had shown interest in the person i loved and trusted the most. Knowing she was in my life. The questions danced in my head, taunting me with every blink. "How did he lose interest so quickly? Things seemed so real and normal." "Why does he want my best friend and not me?" "What am I doing wrong?" These questions and comments on myself mocked me.

I decided to try and win him back. If he wanted mentally ill and crazy, oh, I was gonna give him just that. I played the crazy obsessive ex role. Texting him and calling him, mostly just dumb pranks and me begging for him back the most unserious ways i could. Sometimes he would add me back, we would sext and he would block me again in the morning. But after a while, I met someone else, and gave up.

Thats when he stepped back in. He added me on snapchat, I ignored it. He unadded me and then added me back. I ignored him. He then proceeded to spam like my instagram photos, determined to get my attention. This was now different. He was chasing ME this time. It was tempting, especially since my relationship at the time had been sailing south. But i declined his offers, and went on with my life until,

My relationship ended. All of the sudden, I was back on the obsession train. The thought of him plagued my mind. His hair, his glasses, his voice, his eyes. Everything. The game continued, he would unblock me, we would sext, he would block me in the morning. Eventually I guess this game got old to him because suddenly my texts wouldnt deliver at all, even after a few days. I've stopped myself from reaching out since I called, not expecting a response, and he told me to move on.

Now, my question was, was i really connected to this man, or was I just led into delusion? Well, I fully believe I was a victim of BPD limerence. I do NOT think that we had any sort of soul tie at this point, despite all the angel numbers I've seen in regards to this. I think he's just a shitty guy at this point who liked my hot girl obsession. I think I unfortunately gave him exactly what he wanted, and for that i say to myself: GIRL STAND UP!!!!! In conclusion I am insane and I need to stop letting men take over my brain. At the end of the day, I am authentic. And me. And I have SO much, with or without this man in my life.

[datingformillennials]

Just when I thought I was out...they pulled me back in

I tried to convince myself that I was alright with dating and still fucking the same guy I have been for the last year of my life. The problem is, a very good friend of mine had told me from the beginning that this would not go anywhere. I didn’t want to believe her because I saw the potential and I saw actions. She told me to really think about it, to think about what I want in my life especially in the next five years. She told me to go and manifest that shit.

I continued to keep her words in the back of my head for every time I would question our relationship/situationship. Buuuuut like always we like to give benefit of the doubt and we like to ignore the red flags. 

I decided I would start dating again and my previous posts show the wonderful prospects that I have been blessed with so far (ha ha ha). Because, if not, I’m going to miss 100 percent of those shots I don’t take, right?I made sure to let “him” know that I was going to date and I made sure I told myself to be serious. After all thats the right thing to do. Unfortunately, I would only hope that my honesty would be reciprocated. 

So he eased off and I move forward with my dating life. He started going out more and more and so did I. Only my dating life starting turning into a circus of freaks and flakes. So I end up running right back into his arms so-to-speak. I still had it in the back of my mind what my game plan is and what I am trying to do with my life. The problem was he came back into my life because I allowed him to. I didn’t have any one else that invested the energy or time into getting to know me. Welcome to the world of online dating.

So here I am back at square one. Even though I tell myself it is only for right now. I think Steve Harvey uses a really decent analogy. I know I’m about to butcher it but I’ll try to sum it up the best I can. It’s like a broke down car sitting on bricks in your drive way. It doesn’t work, it’s trash, and it is just taking up space. Meanwhile, you are trying to park a new car in there but you just can’t because this shitty car on bricks is there. How can you fit the new one in with the old one still taking up that space. 

With that, I will leave with the great wise words of a wise man, Whitesnake...

Here I go again

No, I don't know where I'm goin' But I sure know where I've been Hanging on the promises in songs of yesterday And I've made up my mind I ain't wasting no more time 

Though I keep searchin' for an answer I never seem to find what I'm lookin' for Oh Lord, I pray you give me strength to carry on 'Cause I know what it means To walk along the lonely street of dreams

And here I go again on my own Goin' down the only road I've ever known Like a drifter, I was born to walk alone And I've made up my mind I ain't wasting no more time