#<- whoops idk how that tag got in here

[moxijunk]

Speaking of the zine, here's my two pieces that I made for the zine! And also a writing piece I made based on the drawing of Legs and Shadow! Check out the rest of the zine here!

This zine piece was a collab I did with @stressed-sock They drew Shadow while I made Legundo. Also the short fic below that ties in with the image!

[myownwholewildworld]

WHEN THE MOON HOWLS ― a javier peña's autumnal oneshot

main masterlist | read on ao3 | part 2 pairing: javier peña x f!reader. summary: you meet javier in a café during your sabbatical. you see the man that no one does ― the one who is broken, defeated, crushed by his time as a DEA agent. so you make it your purpose to shine some light on his life, one pumpkin spice latte at a time. -or- the story of how you two fall head over heels for each other c: a/n: hiya! been wanting to write for javi p for a while, but was afraid to take the plunge because it's been a hot minute since i last watched narcos. anyways, this fic is for @goodwithcheese and @jolapeno's jolabrew + withcheese fall challenge which i found really inspiring, thank you for hosting this sweet challenge! first time taking part in a challenge too, whoop whoop! as always, all interactions welcome, would love to hear your thoughts. take care! <3 x warnings/tags: 18+, mdni (no smut here, but still). post season 3 of narcos, possibly slightly off-canon? idk. fluff, loads of it! angst, comfort. mentions of ptsd, panic attacks and therapy. halloween/autumnal vibes. trip to the pumpkin patch to cheer our sweet javi up. reader's pov only (v unlike me). no use of y/n. no description of reader (moodboard is only for aesthetic purposes). unbeta'd, soz. w/c: 6.8k (this was gonna be a short drabble... smh) divider by @saradika-graphics

Friday, 18th September 1998

“What can I get for you today, gorgeous?” was your go-to sentence with every client.

Even when your own personal demons stalked you at night, you made your best effort to get out of bed every day and come to work. Working in a café was not in your plans for this year, but a heart-shattering breakup had rocked your world so bad, you needed out.

So, you took a sabbatical from your job in finance, hugged your parents and waved goodbye to your friends. It would only be for one year ― hopefully enough to get your life together and reorganise your priorities.

That was why you moved to Laredo two months ago, to have a fresh start with a blank slate ― where no one knew you and you knew no one. A month into your new life, you realised you needed to do something or otherwise you would go crazy. So you took a waiting job at one of the local cafés. You were just paid the minimum wage, but you had enough savings to live comfortably for a year without any issues.

It was only mid-September ― technically still summer. However, the unusually cold weather made it look otherwise. Fall had appeared sooner this year, and you couldn’t be happier about it. You loved autumn ― its duller hues, the crispy air, the browning leaves, the cozy sweaters, burying yourself under blankets on the couch while channel surfing. It was, by far, your favourite season.

“A pumpkin spice latte, please.” The masculine voice that spoke back to you was plain, deflated ― it lacked… something, but you were not able to pinpoint what exactly.

Your eyes moved from your notebook to the man in front of you, sat at the one of the most isolated tables. A few strands of wavy, brown hair fell across his forehead, the ends caressing the metal frame of the yellow-tinted, aviator sunglasses that shielded his eyes. ‘Brown too,’ you thought. ‘Sad and brown.’

Even if he was not looking at you, you could simply tell. His demeanour, his posture, the way he averted his eyes ― the man spoke of sadness and hurt, of something dark and gut-wrenching you could not even fathom.

And he was alone ― it was obvious he was not waiting on anyone.

“Anything else?” You asked, your throat suddenly dry.

He shook his head no without a word. His hands were placed on top of the table, his fingers intertwined while his thumbs circled each other. It was a restrained yet impatient gesture, as if he could not wait to be left alone.

“Could I interest you in a slice of pumpkin cake? It’s got cream cheese frosting. Shouldn’t say it myself because I baked it, but it’s delicious, I promise.” You tried to tempt him; a soft smile directed at him. “If you don’t like it, it’s on the house.”

The curvature of your lips wavered when his eyes slowly drifted up towards you and locked on yours. They definitely had a sorrowful tint to them ― as if he had seen too much, been witness to too many unspeakable things. His eyes were a window to a crushed soul, that much you could perceive.

His lips formed a flat line as he looked away and through the window to his right.

“Why not then…” His reply was not rude but charged with something unsettling. Something that made you swallow hard.

But you were still smiling back at him. Maybe the guy was having a rough day, a rough week or a rough month. A rough lifetime? Showing him kindness was not going to change his view on the world around him, but if it helped, even a tiny bit, you would smile until the corners of your mouth hurt.

“Alrighty, shouldn’t be long!” You scribbled the command on your notebook, the tip of your tongue unconsciously sticking out between your teeth as you did.

You walked back to behind the counter and when you turned around, you saw the man watching your every move. But as soon as he felt caught, he bowed his head down and looked for something in one of his shirt’s pockets. Soon after that, he lighted a cigarette.

Slightly confused, you faced the coffee maker and looked at the recipe card for the pumpkin spice latte. As you started preparing it, one of your colleagues walked past you.

“Pssst, Alejandra!” You called her in a whisper.

The girl looked around her, unsure if someone had said her name or if it was her imagination playing games.

“Over here”, you waved at her and Alejandra happily trotted towards you.

“Yeah? What’s up? Do you need a hand with that?” She offered her help, as she always did. You were grateful to have such good coworkers in your shift. It was a contrasting experience in comparison to your finance job.

“No, I think I’m okay. Got a question of different nature though,” you ventured pressing your lips together. “The guy over there, sat in the corner…” Alejandra turned her head around to look and stuck her head out, going on her tiptoes and everything. “Hey! Be a bit less obvious, dammit!” You panicked, shaking her forearm as she giggled.

“What about him?” She asked with a cocked brow.

“Who is he? Not seen him before ‘round here.” You tried to sound as casual as possible, but Alejandra’s raised eyebrow told you she was seeing through your bullshit.

“Chucho’s son. Javier.”

“Chucho who?” It seemed like everyone knew everyone in this town, except for you.

“Chucho Peña, he owns a farm on the outskirts of town. That’s his son Javier. He worked for the DEA and has moved back in with his old man a couple of weeks ago. Rumour has it he was fired. Apparently, he was caught doing drugs on the job, can you believe it?” Alejandra didn’t hold back on the gossip. “The same drugs he was confiscating from the narcos, taking them all for himself. Some say he was even selling them back to them and making good profit.”

You knew to take rumours with a very big pinch of salt. Sure, there was corruption in the DEA as in any other governmental organisation, but he did not seem to be that kind of guy. Not that you knew him, anyway.

“Not even his childhood friends are speaking to him now, so if I were you, I’d keep my distance.” She warned you in a hush. “He’s trouble, that dude.”

That broke your heart a little. Javier looked lonely enough ― learning that he was truly on his own resonated loud with you. Being branded a misfit by his own community had to be a hard pill to swallow.

“Mhmm. Sure thing”, was your only reply. Alejandra tilted her head to one side, studying your blank expression. “I was just curious, that’s it.”

“If you say so. But don’t say I didn’t warn you!” Her veiled counsel hung above your head as you resumed the task of preparing his coffee.

Five minutes later you were done and walking back to where Javier was patiently waiting. As you approached his table, a guy pushed back his chair to stand up and hit you hard. You lost your balance, almost tripping with the legs of the chair. Your right hip slammed against the edge of an empty chair and prevented you from falling ― you managed to save the coffee, but the plate with the cake slice slid off your fingers and shattered against the floor.

“Hey! Watch it!”

For a second you thought it was the gentleman reprimanding you, but you quickly recognised the voice ― Javier had stood up, fast as thunder, and his index finger was accusatorily pointing to the man who had mindlessly pushed his chair back.

Before the situation escalated, you straightened out your back and planted a hand on Javier’s forearm to stop him from tackling the guy.

“It’s okay, it’s nothing. I wasn’t looking, it’s my bad.” You quickly tried to diffuse the situation, tension building up between the two men.

“No, it’s not.” Javier replied between gritted teeth. “This asshole should have seen you walking by.”

Your eyes widened as they flew from one man’s face to the other’s. Javier’s outburst was not welcomed by the other guy, who was clenching his fists at his sides. You put the surviving coffee down on a table nearby and placed yourself in the middle of both men, arms extended.

“No need to take this so seriously, it was just a bit of cake, and I’m not hurt.” You said looking at Javier with imploring eyes. You did not need this kind of trouble.

‘He’s trouble’, Alejandra had said. Should you listen?

“Please, accept my apologies.”

“I ain’t paying you shit now, treating one of your regular clients like this.” The man barked back, fuming.

Javier took a step forward and his chest pressed against the palm of your hand. You did not expect to feel his warm skin under yours ― a few unbuttoned buttons on his shirt gave you a peek of his hairy chest.

He clenched his jaw so hard you could see his muscles straining.

“Of course, of course. I’ll pay for it, it’s not a problem.”

Huffing and puffing, the man signalled to his companion and they both walked out the door, mumbling something you couldn’t hear but could imagine.

Slowly you turned to face Javier, whose eyes burnt like gasoline. You didn’t know if he was trouble, but he was definitely danger.

“It’s alright, relax. I’m sorry about the cake, I’ll get you another one. It’s on me, I kinda forced you to buy it.” You offered, thinking he was still mad, while you knelt down to clean the mess with some tissues you had grabbed from the table besides you.

“I’ll pay for it. For both slices.” He replied succinctly, squatting down by your side to help you out.

“You don’t need to”, you quickly said, watching him on the corner of your eye.

His expression softened a bit, and his lips turned into a grimace.

“I do. I think I made things worse for you.” You thought the same but didn’t dare to voice your opinion.

You were customer-facing and could hear your manager in your mind saying ‘The customer is always right. Treat ‘em like royalty’. Bullshit that, really, but was part of the job.

Once the mess was cleared, you gave Javier his coffee and ran back to the counter to cut another slice for him. This time, as you sauntered towards him, you were aware of your surroundings. Luckily, there were no more inconveniences, and the cake slice made it safe and sound to Javier’s table.

“Thanks. And sorry again.” He apologised, his tone throaty with truth. He really meant it.

“Don’t worry about it, honestly.” You grinned at him as you gently squeezed his shoulder without thinking. Javier’s eyes quickly darted down at the touch ― you could swear he flinched. “Oh― S-sorry”, you stammered, pulling your hand back to break contact.

Javier just hmphed and turned his attention to his drink and food.

With your brows knitting together, you made your way back to the counter. From time to time, you would check on him from a distance while serving other patrons. ‘Just making sure he likes it’, you told yourself every time.

After half an hour, Javier got up and walked towards the register.

“How was it?” You asked with a gleaming smile.

“It was good.” Surprisingly, you were slightly disappointed at his lack of enthusiasm. “Really good”, he added a second later, as if he had picked up on your disillusionment.

The smile came back to your mouth.

“Well, I’m glad.” You said while you typed in his order to produce the bill. “It’s $9.42.”

“How much was the… gentleman’s” he spat out the word, “bill? I want to cover it too.”

That offer took you completely off guard, and you started shaking your hands and head at the same time.

“No, no, no. It’s okay, I’ll pay for it. It’s not the end of the world.”

“I insist. Please.” He punctuated every word. “How much was it?”

“Uh, mhmm…” You didn’t want him to take the blow. Maybe he had made the situation worse, but at the end of the day, it was the other guy’s fault, not his. “Are you sure?”

He simply nodded.

“It was $25.37. So the total would be… $34.79.” You composed a pitiful face ― it was a lot of money for a coffee and a cake slice.

Javier handed you a $50 note and then said, “Keep the change.”

With your mouth agape with surprise and not really understanding his generosity, you looked down and extended your hand almost unwillingly.

“But this is a lot…” You started to complain. However, when you looked up at him, you only saw his back.

Javier was already walking out of the café before you could say anything else.

Friday, 25th September 1998

Exactly a week later at ten past five in the afternoon, Javier Peña entered the café you worked at. Your brows furrowed, trying to recall last Friday. Had he gotten there at the same time too? He sat at the same table, same chair as well. The man was a creature of habit, a wild one at that.

Sooner rather than later, you were in front of him, notebook and pencil on hand, with a cheery smile.

“What can I get for you today, gorgeous?” You asked, hoping he would catch the joke ― you also followed a routine.

The joke went over his head. He looked less taciturn than a week before, albeit he still had this aura around him screaming to be left alone. Javier leaned back on his chair and this time, he did make eye contact, unlike last.

A slight yet noticeable change.

“A pumpkin spice latte, please.” This time round, his voice was a bit livelier although still crude.

“Anything else?” Your smile turned crooked as your eyes locked on his.

You saw a sparkle in them, a brightness that flickered under the fluorescent lights of the café. A hint of mischief, you thought too. He definitely had seen the joke now.

“Do you still have pumpkin cake? The one with cream cheese frosting?” He went off script, which made your grin grow bigger.

A creature of habit, but adaptable.

You nodded, writing the order down ― your tongue peeking through your teeth in full concentration.

“Freshly baked, I did it this morning.”

“If it’s half as good as last week’s, I might have to start coming over every Friday then.” A lopsided grin fought its way to his lips, although it didn’t stay there for long.

That brief gesture had transformed his expression, softening the hard edges of his jaw and smoothing out the wrinkles around his covered eyes. You noticed he still had his aviator glasses on, even though it was cloudy outside.

You were not prepared for his compliment, so you just tittered.

“If that’s the case, I’ll make sure to bake one every Friday as to not disappoint you”, you replied jokingly, albeit you truly considered it.

The shadow of a grimace danced on Javier’s mouth. The beginning of another smile, perhaps. Could you be so lucky that he would gift you with two grins in a row? That would be unheard of.

It wasn’t like you were watching him, but you were. Just a few glances here and there though, nothing too obvious. You did not believe in such things, but it seemed like his demons were following him wherever he went. Whatever darkness accompanied him, had a tight grip on him. You wondered what had happened to Javier to give off such an uneasy feeling.

The man was the epitome of wariness ― always looking above his shoulders, his hand tightly latching on to the buckle of his belt. Javier Peña looked like a man who always had a foot in the door, ready to run at the slightest inconvenience. And just because of that, you should be chary, keeping your distance. But it was exactly that, his raw loneliness, what pulled you into his orbit.

You were a fixer, and Javier was broken.

You were a puzzler, and Javier was a puzzle someone had tossed aside ― all the little pieces spread in disarray, unclassified, waiting to be put back together.

Question was, could he be fixed or was he shattered beyond repair?

Friday, 2nd October 1998

“Let me guess. One pumpkin spice latte and a slice of pumpkin cake?”

Javier’s sunglasses reflected the light off the ceiling, his eyes catching a sliver of it. His fingers drummed against the table, his pearly white teeth peeking through the brief smile his lips composed just for you.

“It’s almost like you already know me”, he jested, flattening the palm of his hand against the table and sliding it off until his fingers wrapped around the edge.

That simple motion had you in a trance for a second, your mind blank.

“I do know a few things about you.” It slipped off your tongue before you could refrain yourself.

Once you realised what you had just said, your eyes slightly widened, and you unconsciously chewed your bottom lip.

“Do you?” Javier tilted his head to one side, his kempt moustache wrinkling with curiosity.

You nodded slowly and he cocked a brow, enticing you to continue.

“I’ve noticed you like a routine, always showing up at the same time, ordering the same thing, sitting on the same table, the same chair. And I know you love fall, because why would you be ordering a pumpkin spice latte every Friday since mid-September? With two sugar cubes. And when you attack the cake, you first eat the frosting, then the rest. That’s weird.”

You could have left it there so you wouldn’t sound like a stalker, but once you started talking, you could not stop.

“I know you feel like something, or someone, is following you. I know you always keep an eye on the door, making sure the exit is clear. I know you never turn your back to it either ― and that’s probably why you are, many a times, reaching for a gun in your belt that is no longer there. I know that you are lonely, but that loneliness is self-imposed. I know you don’t like being touched.”

You had definitely paid Javier Peña too much attention. Your last words did not really sink in until Javier’s amused expression transformed into knitting brows and a fine line for lips.

Had you gone too far in your analysis? Why would you say all those things to a complete stranger? When your slip of tongue dawned on you, you covered your mouth, embarrassed of yourself.

“Sorry, I-I didn’t mean to… I just― I shouldn’t have said anything. I don’t know why―” Your words came out in a slurred rush, incoherent and unfinished sentences got stuck to the back of your throat through all that stammering.

He leaned back, his arm loosely draped around the empty chair to his right, near the window. Javier then clicked his tongue.

“Well, I had it coming. I did ask, didn’t I?” His reaction surprised you ― you really thought he was going to up and leave because of your insolence.

You let go a sigh of relief, followed by a nervous chuckle as you hugged the notebook close to your chest.

“Was I… too far off?” You ventured, biting down your bottom lip again. Maybe you shouldn’t push your luck.

Javier took a long minute to respond, his eyes scanning every square inch on your face, as if he was trying to assess whether he could confide in you or not. You found yourself hoping he did.

“No, not really.” He conceded, “I do love fall.”

That hint of mischief you saw a week ago twinkled in his eyes again. Under that sombre and stay-away-from-me bearing, there was another Javier. One who could be mischievous and fun. One that you had been itching to know since he first set foot on the café.

This time was your turn to slant your head to one side, crinkling your lips as you attempted to discern if you were wrong about the rest. Was he playing with you?

“And the rest?” You pushed out of curiosity, knowing full well you shouldn’t take such liberty.

Javier shrugged, his shoulders almost touching his ears. Was he trying to hide a smile?

“I do have one more thing to add to my order.” The change of subject told you he did not trust you that much.

A pinch of disappointment settled in your chest. But you knew you shouldn’t feel this way, you didn’t really know him. For all you knew, he could be a serial killer on the lookout for his next victim and being a DEA agent was just a cover.

“Oh, yes, sorry. What else would you like?” You concocted a smile, but this time it felt forced ― too tense on the corners of your mouth.

Your sight was fixed on your notepad, not daring to glance down at him again. If you had, you would have seen his look of confusion. But you didn’t.

“Another pumpkin spice latte.”

You could not hide your surprise, so inevitably you asked, “Are you waiting for someone today?”

As soon as that question abandoned your mouth, you wished it back, mortified at your audacity. It was none of your business. And you didn’t care. Of course you didn’t.

“Yeah, you. You finish your shift in” he looked at his wristwatch, “fifteen minutes, right?”

You were left gobsmacked. Of all the things you had imagined he would say, that would not be an option at all.

“Uh― Ah, y-yeah?”

“See, you’re not the only one who is observant ‘round here. I do know pumpkin spice latte is your favourite drink too.” Javier explained so matter-of-factly, it would have been impossible to correct him. And he was right, anyway. “So, what do you say?”

You had not really given him an answer and he was obviously waiting.

“Yeah. Yes, of course.” You repeated yourself, a wide smile smoothing out your lips, your cheeks slightly blushed. “I’d like that.”

Friday, 30th October 1998

Every Friday for the last four weeks had been exactly the same, and you couldn’t be happier about it.

Come ten past five, Javier would walk in through the door and sit down on the same table after his therapy session just a few blocks away. You would happily trot towards him, notebook on hand ― just a pleasantry, considering you knew his order by heart: two pumpkin spice lattes, one slice of pumpkin cake, two spoons. In fact, you had it written down before you reached him.

And then, every Friday, he would wait for the clock to mark half past five, coffee almost untouched and the cake slice still pristine on the plate. You would tell your teammates that you would be closing down and that they were free to go. You would rush through your tasks to get everything done before the clock read forty past five. A minute later the “Closed” sign would be hanging on the front door.

And then you would sit down with Javier, both lazily sipping away at your coffees and nibbling at the cake, while you shared your hopes, your fears, your ambitions, your struggles, your likes and dislikes, your pasts. His heavily charged with trauma and anguish, yours full of heartbreak and regrets.

You had learnt all about his time in Colombia ― the rise of the Medellin cartel, the fall of Pablo Escobar, the peak of the Cali cartel and the corruption deeply embedded in the Colombian government. And how it all shaped who he was now, how it all shattered him and his view of the world. All the things he had seen that still haunted him to this day, and how badly he wanted it all to go away. How gruesomely tortured he was by it all.

He had split himself open in front of you over the course of the last month, pouring his soul out while trying to detangle the mess his mind was in. And you could not help but feel for him, cry for and with him. His words had reached further down inside you than you were really aware of.

And while he was getting professional help for his PTSD, you liked to think that your long, deep conversations helped him interiorise part of the trauma, come to terms with it as much as he could. He had not said it out loud, not really thanked you either, but he didn’t need to ― you just knew.

You could not have refrained yourself from loving him even if you had tried. Over the course of the last few weeks, you had fallen for him with every detail you discovered about him. But your friendship had developed so quickly and so profoundly, you were afraid of ruining it. Ruining the only real connection you had felt in a long time.

It felt like the moment for love confessions was long gone ― it had slipped through your fingers without you even realising. And now it was too late to change it. Perhaps it was better this way ― you treasured Javier’s friendship more than anything else. You would not bargain with it, not if it meant there was a teeny tiny chance of losing him. You were not a gambler, not with the people you loved.

“I think you should pick up a camera again, see how it feels. Ignore what your parents have always told you for a moment. You don’t have to make a decision now, or ever, really.” Javier encouraged you, his palm flat against the surface, extended towards you, resting halfway through the table.

How badly you wanted to reach for him, to caress the back of his hand with your fingertips. But you didn’t.

“You’re right. It’s all I always wanted to do for a living. My job in finance, it was just their idea, really. They kept telling me that I’d die penniless on the side of a road if I chose photography as my career path.” You sighed, the spice of your coffee filling your sense of smell as you tipped the cup to your lips. “Do you have any plans for tomorrow?” You asked, an idea forming in your mind.

“No, I was just gonna help my dad on the farm.” Javier replied, a certain interest tinging his voice as he tilted his head ― his chocolate eyes holding your gaze as if it was a staring contest.

You had never met him outside the café, but you were friends. Surely there was nothing weird about meeting up with him tomorrow.

“Well, I was just thinkin’. Brought my camera and equipment when I moved. Tomorrow’s Halloween, could go to the pumpkin patch outside of town to take some pictures. I love taking pictures on fall, the colours are just beautiful. Would you want to join me?” A shy smile hovered over your lips, your heart slightly racing.

Javier’s eyes lingered on your face for an eternal second before he sipped at his coffee. Maybe you shouldn’t have asked ― you knew he didn’t feel comfortable with open spaces, not yet. He had told you about his panic attacks when he returned home and found himself in the open, exposed.

Suddenly, you felt so damn insensitive.

“Sorry, I know y―”

“I’d like that”, he cut you off before you could take the offer back.

Inevitably, your heart swelled, warmth pouring all over your body with his acceptance.

Saturday, 31st October 1998

The car’s door slammed behind you after you rummaged through the backseat to get your backpack. It was full to the brim, as you had taken a few of your lenses, a tripod, a flash you were positive you wouldn’t need, and a few other bits and bobs.

“Sorry!” You apologised as your head buried between your shoulders.

God forbid you made a dent on Javier’s sparkling new Toyota Camry. Well, you didn’t know if it was new, but the car was impeccable inside and out. You were relieved he had offered to pick you up, otherwise he would definitely have judged you for the state your car was in.

“‘S alright.” He muttered, but on the corner of your eye you saw him smoothing out his hand around the edge of the door, ensuring you had not damaged it. “What are you carrying there anyway? Looks like you’re goin’ campin’, pequeña (little one).”

You snickered, Javier by your side in the blink of an eye. So close you could almost feel the warmth he irradiated, even in the crispy, spooky air.

“Oh, ‘s nothing, just a few things here and there that I hope to use later. Might need your help though.” You looked at him askance, measuring his reaction to your petition.

“My help? Mhmm.” He mumbled, almost laconic.

“It’s not too bad. And your aviator sunglasses will come in handy.” You laughed at the confused expression in front of you. “I’m not spoiling it.”

Javier’s lopsided smile made a brief appearance, but it suddenly vanished.

A backfiring noise from an exhaust pipe a few yards away made him flinch, his whole body visibly tautened ― his posture went rigid, his eyes frantically searching his surroundings while his right hand flew to his belt in a vain attempt to grip a gun that wasn’t there.

And then you saw the panic building up in his shielded irises. Even through the yellow tint you watched them darken, so opaque his pupils were indistinguishable from the brown. You could swear he had stopped breathing too, because his chest had not budged one inch.

Quickly you realised what was happening ― the sound from the car nearby had triggered Javier, bringing him back to one of his nightmares. His fight-or-flight response was taking over him, his mind suddenly replaying his time back in Colombia.

When you wrapped your firm hand around his wrist, you could feel his wild pulse under your fingertips ― his heart was beating so hard, it seemed like it was looking for the way out of his torso.

“Javier,” you called his name, giving him a gentle squeeze. He did not respond. “Javi”, you raised your voice over the cacophony on the background, your fingers tighter around his wrist, jerking him close to you.

Slowly he turned to look at you, long eyelashes fluttering, and it took him a moment to gradually come out of his daze.

With your free hand you rubbed his left shoulder, the first time you had been this nigh.

“Hey, Javi, are you okay?” You whispered, his eyes slowly drifting down to your mouth, as he was trying to read your lips rather than listening to your words. “It’s okay, you’re back home. You’re safe. You’re here with me, in a pumpkin patch just outside of Laredo. You’re safe, Javi.” You reassured him in a low voice, the abbreviated version of his name falling from your lips like honey.

You hadn’t realised how scared you were for him until he finally breathed. So did you. Your heart was pounding. Then he nodded, and you thought you saw a sliver of embarrassment in his eyes.

You wanted to comfort him so bad, tell him it was fine to be vulnerable ― but words escaped you, your chest heavy with affliction. The only thing you could do was wrapping your arms around his neck and bring him in for a hug. It only took him a second to swathe your waist, his face partially buried in the crook of your neck.

A shivering sensation down your spine gave you goosebumps. It felt so good having him this close.

“I’m fine.” He hummed eventually, as you both took an unwilling step back.

“I’m sorry. Truly. If you think this is a bad idea, we can just go back.”

He shook his head no.

“No, it’s alright. Gotta push through it at some point. Rather do it with you than alone.” Your heart melted at his words, almost swooning for him.

A soft smile spread across your lips, palming his forearm again. You could not have enough of his touch, of how his skin felt under yours.

“But if at any point it gets to be too much, you’ll let me know. Promise?”

You stuck your pinky out in front of him, asking him to pinky promise he would.

He returned your smile with a devastating one of his own.

“Promise”, was his reply as his pinky wrapped around yours.

Then you both erupted in laughter.

For the next two hours you walked the whole patch together, taking as many pictures as your camera rolls would allow you. Luckily you brought more than one ― knowing yourself too well, you had brought three rolls.

“Hey, Javi! The golden hour is approachin’!”, you shouted at him, amplifying the volume of your voice by placing one hand on the side of your mouth.

Javier’s head poked out in between a humongous pile of an assortment of pumpkins. He went around it to be by your side in a couple of long strides.

“Is this where my aviator glasses come in handy?” He asked with a smidgen of inquisitiveness.

“Spot on. Come, follow me.” You curled your fingers to emphasize your words and you started walking towards a field further ahead.

It was isolated, the yellow grass up to knee height. There were some dead trees around, black branches peppered around the floor. Reaching towards your back, you untied the tripod from the side and set it up, taking your time, while Javi was right behind you.

“So you’re taking pictures of an empty field?” He asked, befuddled.

You just giggled as you knelt and settled your backpack down on the floor. Unzipped it and jumbled stuff around until you found what you were looking for. Snapping your tongue with delight, you pulled out two white bedsheets and a sunglasses case.

“Ha! Here they are!” You enthusiastically presented the objects to a confused Javi, his hands scrunching one of the bedsheets as you handed it to him.

“I don’t get it. You want me to make a bed out in the wilderness or somethin’?”

Shaking your head no, you laughed at his perplexity.

“No, you silly. We’re going to put them over our heads so we look like ghosts, like so.” And then you proceeded to demonstrate, covering yourself with the bedsheet.

Almost blindly, you took your sunglasses out of their case and placed them on the bridge of your nose and over the bedsheet.

“Voilà!” You extended your arms, showcasing your masterpiece to Javier.

You could barely see him through the linen, but his laughter reached your ears. You couldn’t help but smile wide as you grabbed one of the sides and pulled it up to uncover your face.

“I want you to do the same. I’ll set a timer on the camera, and we run over there.” You pointed to a space between some fallen trunks. “And then we just do some silly poses.”

“…Okay?” The hesitation in his voice was faked, because you could see a grin pinching the corners of his mouth.

“Trust me, it’ll look great. I’m a visionnaire!” You said with confidence as you turned around and set the timer. “Go, come on, run!”

You both sprinted to the specific spot you had directed your camera at, and quickly covered yourselves with the bedsheets. Laughing out loud, you both put the sunglasses over your faces and started posing while the camera clicked away at timed intervals.

Back to back with arms folded; one sitting down on the trunk while the other stood up behind; both hiding behind some dead trees with your heads sticking out; just staying still and very straight looking at the lens.

Even Javi got into it by the end, suggesting a few poses of his own occurrence.

You both were having so much fun, cackling so loud, you had tears pouring over your waterlines. You even bent at your waist, hands against your knees, while you tried to catch a breath. Javi was by your side chortling like a kid without a worry in the world.

You pulled the sheet off you and Javi followed suit. You could tell he also had teared up and that tugged at your heart.

“I wish we could see them now, but we’ll have to wait until I develop them.”

You stepped forward to get to the camera, but you tripped with the bedsheet. Clumsy as always, you waved your arms in a vain attempt to regain balance, and failed ― the grass on the ground hurrying towards your face, or, well― quite the opposite.

When you thought you were going to hit the floor, Javi’s broad hand clasped around your elbow and pushed you up, until your chest flushed with his. His mouth was so close to yours, his lips agape and so inviting, you licked your bottom one as you gauged the situation.

“You okay, pequeña?” His voice was just a hush in the confines of your mind.

Unable to speak due to his proximity, you just nodded as your eyes locked on his. This time there were no sunglasses covering his beautiful orbs ― giving you the opportunity to look into the abyss. His abyss. One you had been wanting to jump into for as long as you had known him.

His free hand rested on the small of your back, pressing you into him while his lips were dangerously close to yours. You could smell the hints of tobacco, the old spice, the sandalwood, all of it hijacking your senses.

Something passed between you two. Something that had been there for a while now; something you had not allowed yourself to see.

Too scared to ruin the friendship you so much cherished. Too frightened to have your heart broken again. Too afraid to make a move and be rejected.

But you didn’t need to.

Javier did.

In slow motion, he bowed his head down until his soft, warm lips ghosted yours. A light caress that made your heart jump a beat. And then he pressed them sweetly against your parted mouth, his tongue testing the waters between your teeth as you let him in.

Draping your arms around his neck, you kissed him fondly, tenderly, with all the love you had been stockpiling for a while. With his hands now on your hips, his thumbs gently rubbed the skin under your tee shirt, while your fingers raked through his hair.

And then, in the background, a clicking sound, then a flash. The kiss came to an end, not without Javi leaving a few chaste pecks on your lips before your mouths untangled.

You pressed your right cheek on his chest, eyeing the camera, and chuckled.

“It’s been taking pictures the whole time.” You told him, looking up at him with your chin against his sternum.

“Good. I’d like to have a memento of this moment, pequeña”, Javi cooed as he leaned back down to press another kiss.

“That makes two of us.” You purred, smiling into his mouth before his tongue sought yours again.

The distant howl of a wolf breached the haziness of the kiss and interrupted you. Only then, you realised that the sun had set down a while ago, and a red moon dominated the sky. The atmosphere was rather eerie, almost spooky.

“There are nights when the wolves are silent and only the moon howls.” You quoted a sentence you had read once. “So maybe the moon has howled, and not a wolf?” That was your attempt at staying here, in your perfect, tiny bubble, a little bit longer.

Javi smiled, brushing his lips against yours.

“I rather not find out. Let’s head back, pequeña.”

He grabbed your hand, your fingers laced together, and pulled you towards the camera, him walking one step ahead of you.

One last click captured the final moment as you both sauntered towards it, hands intertwined, and Javi looking over his shoulder right at you.

[fastboatsmojito]

just saw ur scott reblog gRAAAHH WOOF WOOF anyway !!! and it inspired me to request something <3 (love ur writing btw) pls write something with scott and how big he is 😣 a lil suggestive if u know what i mean 🙈

OHH YOU GET IT SO HARD + thank you so much !! 🫶🏼🫶🏼 whenever someone says they like my writing i get so giddy, it’s just the sweetest 😞

Anyways!!! Absolutely, thank you for fueling my obsession with this large man 💓

Just some scattered Scott x reader thoughts really

|CW; somewhat suggestive, he calls you girl once ☝🏼 incredibly obvious size kink from both parties whoops, he’s pretty canon-accurately an asshole, + suggested dom/sub relationship stuff??? Kinda??? Like not really but a little bit??? idk how else to tag that lmao. Obviously there’s a size difference here but it’s not specific, you could really just be shorter than him and it’d work just the same mwah <33

The first time you really notice is a total accident, you got caught up in the sight of the storm in front of you, not even given time to react to his stern “get in.” before he’s picking you up and putting you back in the car.

“What the hell was that?” He snapped, figuratively and literally as you blankly stare at him, still focused on how effortlessly he carried you back to the car.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know, it was just so close-“

“Yeah, no shit it was close. You could’ve gotten yourself killed. You have to pay more attention than that.”

You just nodded, staring at the way his hands flexed as he drove away, suddenly aware of the drastic contrast between the two of you. He picked you up like it was nothing, which was nothing considering the size of him, you just hadn’t thought about it in that way before.

——

He doesn’t think anything of it for a while, chalking your lingering glances up to his over-analytical mind, until you unintentionally piss him off with it.

“Is this going to be a problem for you?” He was right in your face, arms crossed over his chest as he bitterly chewed his gum, working himself up even more when you couldn’t give him a direct answer.

“If you can’t do your job ‘cause you’re too busy staring at me or whatever the fuck, I’ll have to move you to Javi’s team. Got it?” He barked, shaking his head as he stormed off.

As soon as he realizes why you’ve been staring at him, it’s over.

You were at the diner with the rest of the team, smiling as you walked to the table, bumping into some hard, tall, figure in front of you on the way.

He turned to steady you, big hands landing on your waist. “You ever try paying attention to what you’re doing? It’s pretty helpful.” He was a dick, sure. But you still found yourself focusing more on the feeling of his hands and the way your face warmed up at his assertive tone.

“You ever try not being an asshole?” You rolled your eyes at him before you walked away, but he didn’t miss the pause, or the way your breath picked up at his words. He put it together then, having been so caught up in work he didn’t realize just how tolerable you were getting, his hands constantly drifting towards you absentmindedly whenever you were close enough.

——

He usually went to work to get his job done and go home which was made clear, but after a while he got carried away. Comfortable enough being around you to end up reluctantly carrying you out of the car one night.

He tried to wake you up, met with sleepy grunts and you repositioning yourself before falling back to sleep.

He wanted to just leave you in the car, give you a blanket or ‘whatever’ but it was too cold, and you were in some small town he didn’t know well enough. He rolled his eyes as he took you out, large, rough hands a nice juxtaposition to the way he gently lifted you up.

He had to bring you to his room, not sure of where your room key was and not interested in dealing with your mood if he woke you back up.

He laid you down on the bed, throwing the blanket over you before taking off his work shirt and getting ready to begrudgingly sleep on the couch in his own room.

He went to turn off the lights, groaning when he saw you sit up, whining and stretching your arms.

“You know your necks gonna hurt if you sleep on that couch, Scotty. C’mere.” You sleepily muttered, patting the bed next to you.

He knew it was a bad idea, not missing the new nickname as he put his face in his hands, too exhausted to argue and too self-aware to disregard the attitude he’d have if he woke up to you in his bed and a sore neck.

“Jesus Christ. Alright, fine. One time. Don’t make it weird.” He gruffed as he turned the light off before slipping into bed next to you.

You were facing him as he faced the ceiling, his arms crossed firmly along his chest like some grumpy old man, still awake and motionless when you cuddled into him in your sleep.

——

After that he’s basically torturing you until you say it out loud. Putting his hands on your waist all casual to move past you, refusing to acknowledge any of it first.

Both of his hands were on your shoulders as he crouched down to be eye level with you, losing his patience after he caught you staring at his arms when he was trying to talk to you.

“If you want something, you’ll have to use your words like a big girl and ask for it. All this pouty, wordless shit won’t work with me. I need you to listen to me when I talk to you.” He spat condescendingly, minty gum popping in your ears. He grabbed your chin between his thumb and pointer when you shook your head.

“No? I can’t give you what you want if you don’t tell me what you want. I’m not about to guess.” You squeezed your eyes shut to get away from his intense stare.

“I don’t want to say it here.” You barely whispered, opening your eyes when he sighed.

“Damn it.” He breathed before pausing, standing up tall and scanning over the parking lot you were in.

“Alright, come on.” He said bluntly before grabbing you and throwing you over his shoulder.

“Scott-“ You pouted as he swept you back to his motel room.

“Just shut up and let me help you out for once, yeah?”

-

I need him so bad

[brittle-doughie]

Hello CCCC Anon here, 4th time i've sent this so sorry if I seem impatient. It's been a while since I've sent an ask mainly because I couldn't think of anything but here I am!

For some reason I've grown strongly close to one-sided Logical y/n and Royal icing cookie where Royal icing cookie tries to initiate a relationship and flirt with them multiple times, but logical y/n is not only too egotistical and loves themselves(side note: they still care for others to some extent), but is also just plain rude, very blunt with their hatred of Royal icing cookie, and is too focused on finding ways to get themselves and the other halves to become whole(y/n).

They can and WILL reject Royal icing cookie harshly since they know how terrible of a cookie he is cause of him being unhealthily obessed like his sister, the other halves, especially y/n's logical side know this.

Not only that; despite them claiming to be emotionless, they can emotionally lash out, mainly out of anger, resulting to them having a higher chance of inflicting violence on others, on purpose or not. Recovery from injuries inflicted by them may take a long time or not be able to recover from them at all, as Logical side y/n's nearly entire body is made up of strong metals and not sugary sweets; they will not apologize not matter how many times you try to get them to.

So please do include this at the end where instinctual side y/n holding back an angry logical side from accidentally killing off royal icing cookie who's laying on the floor and now has to deal with a severe injury inlicted on him (and somehow survived idk how but he did) by y/n's logical side, because as emotionless they claim to be, they still have flaws mixed in them and the other halves from y/n splitting into three.

So I propose one-sided logical y/n and Royal icing cookie based on these lyrics!

"I love you!

I love you not.

I love you~!

I love you not.

Should I take or should I break your heart?

Should I take or should I break your heart?"

The lyrics are short yes but better than nothing really. If you want the song then it's called "love you, love you not" by little purr man.

Anyway imma move back into the shadows til I got a new idea, Farewell!

Sincerely- CCCC Anon

Yooo @/scarabeeart, probably should’ve asked sooner if it’s all good to tag you for Royal Icing mentions, whoops.

Unfortunately, logic simply doesn’t mix with a determined cookie that by all means wants to claim the hand of the one he adored and the answer of no only makes me ponder on his APPROACH rather than Logical’s geunine disinterest.

It would come to ahead where Logical would lash out at Royal Icing, tired of having to tell him over and over that they’ll never like him to the degree that he does for them. Instinct has to step in and calm down Logical, as Royal Icing clutched his face with the bruise of the smack.

And yet, something that his sister would do…

He only focused on that Logical PAID ATTENTION to him, never the strike. He saw it as his efforts working and will act to double them so, maybe the next time will be the one where he finally gets their hand.

Much to Logical’s irritation, of course.

[riacte]

Space Opera AU dashboard simulator

🥧 syrupstars Follow

Anyone else think that Red King racer is a little... y'know... fruity?

👑 falsewellsupremacy Follow

He literally says "ladies, gentlemen, everyone in between, get in line" so I think that answers your question.

🥧 syrupstars Follow

What about the "#Ally4Life 🏳️‍🌈" on his Twilight handle?

👑 falsewellsupremacy Follow

I genuinely have no idea. Maybe he thinks it's about him being an ally to cishet people

#idk ren's just like that sometimes #void knows what he's doing #also prev tags you do not want to get into the black hole of who ren has dated #he has rumours with 3/4 of the grid #edit: WHO MENTIONED BAD BOY TEENAGE REN IN MY NOTES #the shippers are here... oh no #edit 2: not ren at the club.

74 notes

🛑 bluebatshater Follow

oh my voiddd ofc That Duo got p1 again... i need them to dnf in the race. i hope they crash and burn and die and i need crastle to get podium for ONCE. i am so mad. i am calling for the goddess tsuki to curse them. dnf dnf crash burn DIE

🌻 lesbianlumian Follow

the goddess tsuki LITERALLY protects racers and that's why they pray to her? you think the goddess tsuki, creator of lumians, will curse an actual lumian? be so fucking fr

🛑 bluebatshater Follow

if you dont have anything productive to say get off my post. freak

#those blue bats stannies are SO ANNOYING THEY ARE EVERYWHERE #they're overshadowing all the other teams #cant even be a bitchy hater in peace #salt #negativity #hateposting

12 notes

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

OMG FALSE IS SO PRETTY SHES MY QUEEN OF HEARTS OMG OMGOMGOGM 💖💖💖💖💖💖 i tihnk im gonna pass out. HER HAIR FLYING IN THE WIND AND HER RED FRECKLES AND HER SMILE WHY IS MY HEART BEATING SO FAST and Ren is hot I guess he's tall like a ferris wheel

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

Looking at posts from five years ago is funny like how did I ever believe I was straight

🍦 jelliepopsicle Follow

OP, I think I recognise your url... did you write that viral Bad Boy Ren x QoH fic on Launchpad?

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

💀 Shut the fuck up right NOWWW!!

#STOP MENTIONING THAT FIC I WFOTE WHEN I WAS THIRTEEEN!!! #everything before my gay awakening is not canon. sorry #tbh... as much as a nightmare it was i kinda miss that stupid fic #it was from a simpler time #now im in university trying to contact my groupmates and i think one of them got lost in a blackhole last tuesday (again) #sigh. this keeps on happening to me #my cousin worked on one of the moons last summer for two weeks and came back like he'd aged six months #my friend's ex got sucked into a black hole and was briefly spaghettified but they managed to revive her and she gloats that she's finally taller than my friend's ex #whoops sorry for dumping in the notes #anyways. bad boy rk x good girl queen of hearts. awful idea. even more awful fic. yet i wrote it #i regret everything and nothing

25 notes

🗣️ peace-and-planets-deactivated63891092

PSA: Sunblr user @/summerheavens writes RPF of the Exterra 1 racers. She is a big name fan in the Miraculous Laserbug fandom so I thought you all would like to know. This is gross and disgusting behaviour and I implore you to stop.

🍬 summerheavens Follow

umm @/peace-and-planets i literally saw your kudos on my fic. the evidence is out there. girl what are YOU doing at the devil's sacrament. what are you doing on my roseduo rpf titled "hang your head low in the glow of the vending machine (we're not trying)".

but i'm glad you liked it enough to give it a kudos ^_^ will certainly be putting more on the starchive!

❄️ justwingit Follow

LMFAOOOO OP DEACTIVATEDDDDD 😭😭😭 sunblr user got killed by a rpf author. if you're gonna secretly read rpf maybe not leave a kudos?????

🚀 exterrablrheritage

Exterra 1 Heritage Post

⚡ littlewoodbabygirl69

It's been ten years since this post... @/summerheavens are you okay after recent developments

🍬 summerheavens Follow

am i okay? is ANYONE okay??? in these trying times??????? with the most chaotic gp to ever exist?????? i am PULLING OUT WIPS i dropped out of respect ten years ago. i've got to send my kid to daycare but once i'm done you bet you're seeing me on the starchive. miss swift even dropped her 20th album just in time for me to use lyrics as titles. i am LIVING and i am THRIVING

#ohhhhhhhhhh #let's go #also can't believe taylor finally addressed the vehicle manslaughter rumours from like twenty years ago #how fitting #also littlewood needs to get his shit together #why does he look like he's the one who hasn't seen his man in 32738102371 years and got his soul shattered #he's weak and won't survive the winter

27,408 notes

🧈 butteredbread Follow

WHAT is wrong with that lykos. i desire him carnally

🌳 treebark

@/handoftheking

🪓 handoftheking

I mean... yeah. Let's face it, we're all like that 🤷

⭐ nonbinarystar Follow

MR LITTLEWOOD WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE

#WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM #I HATE HIM SO MUCH #PARASOCIAL RELATIONSHIPS CAN ALSO BE ABOUT HATE #THIS GLOWSTICK MF IS MY WORST ENEMY #he just canonised treebark for the sixth time #also prev tags so real #need to slingshot him into a faraway galaxy

34,091 notes

🫃 spaceshipmpreg Follow

Who put that Just a Dream FalseRen AMV on my dash again

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

Respect your roots!! That 125M views Just a Dream AMV raised a generation. Every kid in my school played it on loop on their ipods during recess

🔮 queenofstarz03 Follow

wait op can you explain your url

🫃 spaceshipmpreg Follow

No 👍

#i think we should get the dogwarts freighter pregnant

6 notes

[buthowboutno]

HELLO I'm new to asking things here but I've a small,,, tiiny question that idk if anyone's asked before or not but

What happened at metro tower between sweets and Leo? And, I suppose, with everyone else there, if anyone (like April) recognized Sweets

Because Donnie didn't, Raph and Mikey didn't say anything,,,

Leo and April are the only two that basically said "oh! You're the kid that almost died while we saved the world" so Idk I kind of was curious on, I guess

Like other than, obviously, Leo saving sweets but I guess how he found them? Because I know it's stated somewhere Sweets locked themselves in their moms office but idk

You don't gotta answer this at all (especially if it's a stupid question 💀💀) I just I got myself curious ig

this ask prompted me to write a whole ass snippet about what happened. i blame you. /aff

(snippet under the cut)

If it had been up to Splinter, Leo wouldn’t even be five feet away from his cot in the med bay, much less searching through the remains of Metro Tower. Mikey was still out of commission and Drax was doing some weird mystic ritual on Donnie to help with his head.

If it had been up to Leo, Raph would be in the med bay instead of digging through rubble by his side. April tagged along as well, but she was a floor below looking for… something.  

Leo might have been too ticked off about April and Raph bulldozing his plan to listen beyond every fifth word of their justification.

(Didn’t they know that this was Leo’s—?)

(After all that, they still trust—?)

They hadn’t found any survivors since the first day of searching, when Donnie passed out after manifesting a mystic slide for a group of harried interns that were stuck on the third floor. Mikey’s hands had cramped up so bad after guiding the lone barista out from their cupboard on the second floor that he was still having trouble holding a fork.

Leo wasn’t even sure why he insisted on coming back, to be honest. After four days trapped in this building, there was a good chance that any stragglers would have died of dehydration by now. Donnie’s scans, at least, didn’t show anyone in the building that they didn’t get out already.

Leo just… had this feeling. He couldn’t explain it.

Raph jumped up and tapped the big red ‘5’ hanging from the ceiling before the stairwell, startling Leo out of his thoughts. Under his massive hands, the sign crumbled off of the wall.

“Uh, whoops?” Raph said, looking sheepish as he turned towards Leo.

Leo snorted, “Property destruction. Nice.”

“That was… not my fault,” Raph said, his face screwed up as he stepped towards the stairs, “This whole buildin’ is— "

The floor creaked dangerously beneath Raph’s feet, prompting him to stumble backwards out of the stairwell. Leo took a few tentative steps forward, noting the slight shift in the floor but otherwise no other changes beneath his feet.

“Falling apart,” Leo finished, jumping up and down for good measure. No change, but Leo didn’t like the cracks slowly making their way up the walls.

“Maybe it's time to head back?” Raph suggested gently, taking another scared step backwards when the floor started creaking again, “Raph is getting a little geeked out.”

Leo nodded, taking a step towards Raph before he was struck with this urgent feeling in his chest. Like he had left something behind.

“I’m gonna take a quick look around,” Leo said, stepping back into the stairwell, “You’d better go back down and grab April.”

“Leo–”

“I’ll portal out if the building starts falling down, scouts honor,” Leo said before ducking up the stairs. Raph’s responding groan told Leo that Raph wasn’t going to march up there and grab him. Probably more due to the fact that the stairs would give out underneath him, but Leo would take what he could get.

(Leo was going to be majorly cussed out about this stunt when he got back.)

(Worth it.)

(At least, he hoped it was.)

The sixth floor of Metro Tower, surprise surprise, was functionally identical to floors two through five. The building was mostly leased out to a bunch of different companies doing Spirits knows what in their copy and paste cubicles. 

(They didn’t find any survivors above floor twelve. Leo tried not to think about it.)

Leo raided a few of the fancier looking offices, sending various pieces of tech back to Donnie’s lab through mini-portals. Bribery, maybe, but mostly practice. Leo’s portals had felt off since the–

…Yeah. He needed the practice.

Leo heard a muffled shout from down the hallway, immediately pulling out his second katana and running quietly towards the noise.

Leo noticed the kid first. They had dustpans duct taped to their chest and back like some budget LARPer. They held a yardstick out with a broken pair of scissors haphazardly attached to the end, trembling like Mikey after a fourth cup of coffee. A Kraang zombie shuffled towards them, its face half-melted at this point. 

Why was it still–?

Leo needed to tell the others about this. Donnie was positive that everyone who got infected would’ve been released after they closed the portal to Kraang Prime. This was– this wasn’t a good sign.

The kid shouted at the zombie like they were trying to scare off a bear and tossed a stapler at its head. Decent shot, but ultimately useless. The stapler landed on the zombie’s head and was slowly absorbed into the Kraang viscera protruding from its skull. 

The kid yelped, moment of bravery apparently lost, and ran in Leo’s direction.

Leo recognised that face. It was just a passing photo, something Casey swiped past while stammering about nerd shit like the ‘space-time continuum.’

(Donnie’s influence, no doubt. Leo may have been Casey’s sensei, but Donnie tended to infect people with his intelligence.)

This kid was younger than the photos, though. Their hair was cut short just above their ears, and the dark circles under their eyes told Leo that they hadn’t been getting much in the way of water or sleep since the invasion started.

That half second of thought cost Leo his chance to take down the zombie before it lunged at them.

The kid, thankfully, heard the zombie before it had the chance to grab them and whirled around with their makeshift spear. Their jab landed solidly in the zombie’s chest, but that still didn’t stop it. The zombie's neck craned out in a truly unnatural manner and bit the kid’s hand while it was still holding their spear. The kid let out a painful shriek that rattled inside of Leo’s skull.

That finally spurred Leo into action, sprinting on the front pads of his feet and slashing the zombie clean into three pieces. The body hit the ground without so much as a tentacle reaching out in protest.

The kid fell to the floor, eyes open with fear as they held out their left hand. The mutagen had already started spreading, past their second knuckle already, but it was moving slower than when–

Leo should’ve thought a little harder before he let his reflexes take over. In a second, he sliced off the kid’s pinky and ring finger before the mutagen had a chance to reach their palm. 

They screamed out in pain, immediately clutching their left hand to their chest and staring up at Leo with wide, terrified eyes. 

“Hey, it’s okay,” Leo tried, “I’m here to help.”

Their face was quickly turning white from the blood loss, but the look on their face made Leo think that they’d still try to stab him if he came any closer.

He’d probably deserve it, to be honest, but the kid needed a hospital above anything else. Leo reached down and grabbed the kid before they could fight back. He quickly sliced a portal through the wall and walked out onto the sidewalk in front of Metro Tower. With two more twirls of his katana, April and Raph were standing right next to him.

Leo tried not to think about the ache in his chest after opening up those portals. He pushed the pain out of the back of his mind as he focused on putting pressure on the kid's hand.

“What the–?”

“Med kit, now,” Leo demanded, not even looking at Raph. The kid was trying to wriggle out of Leo’s grasp, but the blood loss was obviously starting to get to them.

Raph wordlessly took the kit from his belt and handed it over. April was standing behind him in shock, hands twitching as if she was trying to figure out what to do.

“Fucking… wizard,” the kid stammered, now clutching onto Leo instead of fighting him, “My g-goddamn hand.”

“You’re welcome, pal,” Leo said flatly. He dumped the travel bottle of rubbing alcohol on their hand haphazardly before wrapping it up as tightly as he could.

“Eat my ass, Dr. Strange,” the kid muttered before looking up at Leo with a sudden and unusual clarity, “I think I’m going to pass out now.”

“Wh– no, wait!” Leo protested before the kid slumped fully into his arms.

That must’ve rattled April out of whatever funk she was in. She reached into the med kit and grabbed one of the instant cold packs, harshly squeezing and then shaking it to activate it.

“They’re going into shock,” she said, leaning down to apply the pack to the back of the kid’s neck, “Leo, can you portal–?”

The moment April touched the kid, Leo was sent into the mindscape. It wasn’t the same as a normal ninja mindmeld; typically, Leo was still able to see through the eyes of his physical body while it happened. This was like his entire consciousness was captured and taken somewhere else.

Leo turned his head to the left and saw April standing next to him, her eyes trained on something else. 

Donnie? No, not Donnie.

Not his Donnie.

This Donnie was… older. Scarred. Taller than Leo thought his twin could ever grow to be. He didn’t speak a single word, just held Leo’s gaze with an intense expression and nodded.

Leo understood, in a split-second, that the kid in his arms was precious. They were family. The pull, the call that compelled Leo back to Metro Tower was more than an antsy feeling driving him out of his cot. 

This… this was one last wish of a doomed timeline.

Leo also understood that if he let this kid bleed out on the streets of New York, the ghost of Donnie future wouldn’t let him sleep peacefully for the rest of his life.

“April? Leo?” Raph asked, his tone incredibly concerned as Leo snapped back to reality.

“Donnie called them ‘Sweets’,” Leo murmured under his breath.

“...What?”

Leo shook his head, clearing the images from his mind, “Right. Let’s go.”

[callmehere-iwillappear]

20 Questions For Fic Writers

this has been sitting in my drafts for probably months and i actually don't remember who tagged me at this point sorry </3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

26

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

168,724

3. What fandoms do you write for?

currently just rise but i've had some other fandoms i've written for in the past

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

call me here (i will appear) Use Only For Intended Purpose The Idiot's Guide to Blindfold Chess new phone who dis because i fear i'm lost (and i cannot be found again) wow big surprise(/s) all of these are rise al;jfldksjfkd

5. Do you respond to comments?

i try to but uh </3 i am not very good at it

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ummm. probably waiting for answers, wasting time bc even if u know the comfort and healing comes there very much isn't any in the fic itself so whoops </3 i am not good at hurt/no comfort so i don't. have a lot of fics that would really qualify

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uuhhhhh ig fibonacci? most of my fics have relatively happy endings and. this is the one with the least angst overall so

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not yet thank god

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

i do not alfjdlkjfkdls

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

imma keep it real with you chief most of the crossovers that i've written are with other people's aus and idk if that counts

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of fingers crossed

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yeesssss? sorta? it's not like, on ao3 but i've done some collab crossover stuff with friends (see aforementioned crossover question)

14. What’s your all time favourite ship?

god idk. i don't do a lot of shipping these days sorry </3 i have some ships i think are cute but i'm not like, into them enough to say they really qualify

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

i want to finish idiot's guide and cmh very very badly and i refuse to jinx it. idk abt npwd solely because of like the type of fic it is, idk if it'll ever be finished finished yk. like there'll always be more little scenes i can do

16. What are your writing strengths?

um. i've been told i'm good at character voice

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

sweats nervously

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

i don't really do it? i probably wouldn't unless it was like, just a couple words - i don't mind too much when other ppl do it bc i have a translation extension on my laptop but i don't have many options when i'm on my phone

19. First fandom you wrote for?

doctor who........ i was like. god idek. fifteen? maybe younger i straight up don't remember <- also none of this is on ao3 this was like, back in my ff.net days and i don't think i even remember my login lmao

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

hmm hm hm. okay. probably because i fear i'm lost. just bc like... idk i'm proud of how it turned out and i'm really . idk. happy with the reception it got. i'm happy it reached people who can relate to it. and it's short enough that there's not like, enough space for there to be parts where i just have to force myself to write stuff i'm not 100% happy with to fill in the gaps. if that makes sense

tagging: You

[the-matron-of-ravens]

Genuinely curious, what are your thoughts on Dancer and FCG cuz like, he Literally, not figuratively, tried to kill her and did kill all of her companions at the time. I can see being critical cuz she doesn't seem to treat them like sentient beings, but even in the canon... most of the automatons aren't. Just some of the really old ones from Aeor/other old cities, right? So? She got a whoops!sentient microwave, treated them like a microwave, they killed all her friends and almost her and she's supposed to....? Be good buds with them? Also I know it's said that she trauma dumped on FCG, but let's switch it from microwave to personal journal - how would YOU feel if your personal journal popped to life and attacked you for trauma dumping? IDK haha I guess Idk you opinions and I'm just responding to my projected assumptions of your opinion. REALLY I'd 100% sincerely would like to hear your thoughts. I was really bothered by FCG pushing to meet with Dancer. Like jeez just leave her alone, you're her literal sleep paralysis demon, read the room.

Hey! Thanks for the ask, I put this a little bit in the tags but I can elaborate more here. (Edit: elaborate A LOT MORE it seems)

So here goes, I don’t know if you meant it this way but the analogy of a journal or microwave is helpful here because that’s exactly how Dancer treated FCG - as a tool to be used. But they *aren’t*. FCG is a whole being with emotions and thoughts all of which are apparent and so clearly distinct from other automatons.

So tbh, I think the perspective of “whoops! Sentient bot” makes sense for like a month, max. Not years. After all, we have seen NPC after NPC recognize FCG is a sentient being almost immediately after meeting him. I find it VERY hard to believe that Dancer never realized it herself.

Additionally, we need to step out of the plot itself and look at FCG’s mechanics. We know that every time he heals, takes damage for someone else, etc. he takes stress points, and that once past a certain threshold his switch flips and he goes full Murderbot.

We also know that rest and recovery are what reduces FCG’s stress points. So that tells us that Dancer was using and using and using FCG and not letting him rest (enough? At all?) even though he needed it. Because again he’s a person not a tool.

Even when they met back up recently and FCG sobered her up she remarked how she missed him doing that for her. And while I don’t expect her to miss him, I do think it’s indicative of her interest in him never being about him as a person but only how he could serve her.

And if we want to criticize FCG for his lack of boundaries, inability to take no for an answer and pathological need to fix Dancer sure that’s fair. He needs to unlearn a lot of that and quick. But we then have to ask ourselves where did those traits come from? They didn’t come from nowhere.

FCG is mentally extremely YOUNG. Aside from the 6?-ish Months spent with Ashton all he remembers is his time with Dancer. So, if FCG has a pathological need to fix others, to help them, and feels worthless if he’s unable to do so - that comes from how Dancer treated and trained him.

That doesn’t just go away; ESPECIALLY not when FCG doesn’t even remember going postal and doesn’t see to have the (IMO) most clear and realistic view of his and Dancer’s relationship.

After all look how he interacts with the Changebringer. She’s his surrogate Mom/Dancer. He needs someone to tell him how to feel, think, and what’s Good and Bad because he doesn’t know how to do it for himself - because he wasn’t *taught* to.

But here’s my real question. What do we call one person keeping another person in service to them, with no compensation or personhood to be had, and with no intentions of releasing that person from that service? That’s slavery my dude. AT BEST indentured servitude.

(but that implies there’s a debt. What debt? Waking him up? He didn’t ask for that; that was her choice.

And again this sounds a lot like children being “indebted” to parents for giving them life, housing, feeding, etc. )

That’s the part I can’t get over. And that’s the part I can’t get behind where FCG is the abusive one. The power differential was NEVER in FCG’s court; he never once thought of himself as a person or as anything but in service of “Soul Touched”. That complete sacrifice of yourself and your needs (or an inability to even know you HAVE needs) comes from being in relationships where those things are expected/demanded.

So, yeah, he literally tried to kill her, and I gotta be real I’m not surprised. Even children of abusive parents who they love snap sometimes. Because again, that’s mentally what he was at the time. A child.

But even then, no I don’t think it’s unreasonable or unrealistic for Dancer to be traumatized or not want to see FCG again. I don’t even think she’s wrong to say “I can’t give you closure” because closure isn’t something other people give you.

But the way she’s been discussed to be largely clueless about his sentience, blameless in his blow up, and FCG’s victim? I just can’t get behind that. Like at all.

[yae-energy]

╰┈─✩ ˚ ‧ random thoughts : 2 ‧ ˚

✧˖° synopsis : more random hc’s cause why not (the manga is crushing my soul)

✧˖° cast and crew : yuta okkotsu, maki zenin

.ᐟ content warnings : cursing (cause when am i not)

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ authors note : idk yall i just wanted to post 😭 i got at least 3 more ideas i wanna do.

~

yuta <3

- really good at math for absolutely no reason at all, mental math specifically cause istg this man is like a fucking calculator

- was a nightcore kid (BADDDDDDDLYYY)

- used to be a really big harry potter fan for a while

- loves musicals. like, LOVES musicals

- will say a lot of stuff ironically to the point where it actually becomes unironic and it annoys everybody to hell and back. but he genuinely cannot stop 😭

- vocal stims with the most annoying tiktok audios

- loves carrots and hummus and doesn’t like celery

- he love’s halloween and always matches costumes with inumaki

- his biggest pet peeves are gum popping and squeaky noises. like he will genuinely get so pissed off if he hears either of those things

- is really good at board games & card games, like he’ll really whoop your ass in some uno tbh (which is why no one plays with him) and pls don’t let him get his hands on them draw 4’s or it’s absolutely over for everybody. (and it’s even worse if they’re playing train. like he loses friends afterwards)

*before each turn he’s like ���😬 sorry guyssss” (he’s in fact, not sorry)

*also is unnecessarily good at monopoly, like he racks up all the properties so quickly and everyone always thinks he’s cheating

- has really bad eczema (mainly gets it on his neck and it’s reallyyyyyy bad in the winter)

—

maki <3

- lactose (and still consumes dairy but like…at what cost girlie ☹️)

*also has horrible indigestion

- likes strawberries but hates strawberry flavored things. do NOT give her no strawberry flavored NOTHING or she will fight you

- is a sparkling water enjoyer (inumaki and panda clown her for this everyday and have been since they met her)

- doesn’t like bananas, she has a visceral HATRED for them i tell you. nobody knows why either but that’s just the way it is.

- COFFEE LOVERRRR (loads that shit up with creamer and sugar)

- loves doing crossword puzzles (and puzzles in general)

- really good at chess and ESPECIALLY checkers (she’s just really good at most games tbh, she doesn’t know how either)

- her glasses are always dirty LMAO (same girlie, same)

- really likes baseball, like really really likes it 😭

- adding onto the coffee one: she is an ice coffee FANN. everytime she’s mad one of the second years brings her an iced coffee and she’s completely ok again.

- she’s a dnd girlieeee !!! and she plays with yuta and inumaki when they all have time

- hates reading anything because she just doesn’t feel like it (and she’s impatient) so she gets yuta to read it for her 😭

- is one of those people where if you ask her to do something she’ll instantly say no but do it anyways 💀

- really good at mimicking people’s voices and copying signatures (like it’s actually terrifying)

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ tags : @morosis-haze @jogeto @mypimpademia @zairene @planetlunaa @cosmiles @milesmolasses @chinieh @romiantic @stqrriichiigo

if you wish to be tagged in any future works, here’s my tag form to fill out <33

if you wish to submit a request, here’s my ask box :)

⤑ .𖥔 ݁ ˖ closing notes : took wayyyyy longer than i needed to finish this ! (just the life of being an adhd girlie 😋‼️) but pt.2 to this will come out shortly

also notice how i cannot SHUT THE FUCKKK up about these two like they did NOT need to be this long, do i care though? not really !!

now i’m onto these fuck ass tags 🙄

anyhow, love y’all 🫶🏽

update as of posting : it did take me over a month to post this i won’t lie…mb 😭

- xoxo, yves <3

[us-the-voices-and-more-voices-2]

social media’s in a nutshell, but the people who actually use them.

Twitter: So did I you know your an awful person?

also twitter: Racism, racism, racism, sexism, your best friend talking about a dog they saw, sexism, sexism, homophobia, homophobia, homophobia, transphobia, NSFW art from a mutual, transphobia, transphobia, and then the worst take in the history of worst takes by some 13 year old or maybe it was actually 30 something you can’t tell.

YouTube: “why YouTube has become a capitalist hellhole for anyone who dares speak about anything not consumer friendly: A video essay” 4 hours and 50 minutes long, 40,895 views.

also YouTube: “me and my friend are mermaids btw here’s how to do the mermaid spell! Easy in 1 step!” 26 minutes long.

also also YouTube: “I COMMITED TAX FRAUD AND TRIED TO OUTRUN THE AUTHORITIES CHALLENGE 24 HOUR CHALLENGE PART 1 OF 279” 10 minutes long and has almost a billion views.

also also also YouTube: “beheading” 13 minutes long, with 1,600 views.

ALSO ALSO ALSO ALSO YouTube: “HUGGY WUGGY TOILET NAKED VORE?” 20 minutes long, 8 million views.

4chan: be me> sexless loser> finds amazing wonderful woman who loves me for me> she’s fat> keep her until someone else comes> me and her do exercise and eat better> she becomes 100/10> gets married> has kids> love of my life>

also 4chan: ROBOTS, /B/ WE MUST UNITE THIS FUCKER BLENDERED A CAT WE MUST KILL HIM>

THAT (insert string of slurs) WILL GET WHAT’S COMING TO HIM>

FOUND HIS ADDRESS AT 404 CATBLENDER MAN STREET>

AUTHORITIES CALLED I GOT THE RSPCA AT THE HOUSE LETS GO /B/ FUCK YEAH THIS IS A WIN FOR ALL THE ROBOTS LETS GO>

also also 4chan: *the most graphic picture you have ever seen that haunts your soul and your life you will never be the same* hey /b/ look what I found>

also also also 4chan: guys, *insert the most out of pocket slur filled green post you hav ever seen* and that’s why I think (insert minority) are degenerates>

tiktok: *video of hatsune miku dancing with the caption* it’s not okay to encourage ED$ instead be kind and respectful and not be f@tphobic and @blei$t

also TikTok: *a video plays before quickly cutting out replaced with a new one* YOU ARE MAKING PEOPLE UNALIVE THEMSELVES WITH THIS TIKTOK GET HELP TRANS PEOPLE AREN’T GŘOÖMËRS AND PDFILES YOU ARE AWFUL!

also also TikTok: *a video plays of a montage of red and black text* you never saw me as real, you never saw me. I’m going to k1ll myself soon, life is too hard my parents have taken away my ps5 and my phones I am making this on my friends phone. Good bye cruel world.

also also also TikTok: *dangerous things happen in quick succession* “so that’s how you do a deep clean of your home!” comments : girly😭 NO you can’t use 🔥 on wooden floorboards 😰

comments: 💀💀💀 bro’s using chemical weapons to clean her sink💀💀💀

Comments: BLEACH IN YOUR FISHTANK? GIRL ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOUR BF’S DISCUS😬

comments: okay you did so many things wrong here and genuinely I’m surprised your are still alive-1

Cleangirly: no it was pretty safe idk what you mean🤷‍♀️

Comments:WHAT DO YOU MEAN SAFE? YOU SET A FIRE TO CLEAN THE FLOORBOARDS?-2

Also also also ALSO TikTok: *a video explaining why if you hate the color blue your a narcissist* yeah anyone who hates blue is a big red flag girlies

Tumblr: “guys penis” 1 million notes

also tumblr: *a long post explaining the intricacies of sexuality, sexism, the queer identity, toxic masculinity, and how colonialism and racism plays into it.* so yeah long post whoops.

reblog: *the most loaded toxic reblog you have ever seen* woman should all be killed.

reblog: *starts out making some form of sense then devolves* ALL MEN ARE RAPISTS AND SHOULD BE PUT TO DEATH NOW

reblog: *a story relating heavily to the post, which makes the original post better by its addition* so yeah some other re blogs are missing the point but you really put my experience into words thank you <3

reblog: *a picture of the tags filled with the weirdest take you have ever seen* Uhh who are you and can you leave tumblr? Thanks?

also also tumblr: gifly the gif, share gifly the gif because look at him *mindbogglingly fast images flash*

Quora: “why is the sky blue?”

answer 1: because god made it that way in his infinite wisdom

answer 2: because *long winded but concise explanation on how it works* I have a doctorate in this subject.

awnser 3: Long story short, it’s not blue it’s the ozone or something.

Facebook: “meemaw want to add you as a friend” *presses yes, anyone you have ever known tangentially appears in the Facebook friends page*

Also Facebook: “Gerald is my husband who I love”

Comments: that’s nice Geraldine, happy anniversary

Comments: *long winded conspiracy theory* that’s why the illegals want to rule the world and destroy us all

also also also Facebook: *random 5minute crafts video* TOP TEN LIFE HACKS FOR COOKING!

comments: oh what an amazing video! -Geraldine

comments: YOU CAN MAKE THE POPPED CORN WITH A COKA COLA CAN?

comments: I am showing this to my dear wife Geraldine. -Gerald

omegle: *video starts live-streaming and you see an older man’s cock* “…” “…” “you 13?” “…” *ends chat*

also Omegle: *you and a guy talk for ages* that was awesome here’s my socials! See you soon friend!

reddit: “why the Reddit mods are power hungry” *it is a screenshot of a screenshot talking about mod abuse.* “REDDIT WANTS US SILENT WE MUST FIGHT!” *deleted post*

also Reddit: “top ten anime wifus in (PEDO BAIT SHOW) and why I’d fuck them”

also also Reddit: “how do you fix a bolted screw valve on a pressure cooker…”

Vine: *5 seconds of comedy*

[maochira]

Hi! I absolutely LOVE your writing and energy on here it truly brings so much to the blue lock community as a whole 👁❤️👁!! I hope you’re doing well and staying healthy (there’s a new COVID variant???? Plus allergy season is whooping a lot of people rn)!

Could I request a sequel to the Kunigami’s older sibling/NEL assistant scenario where the sibling either gives up trying to reach out to kunigami AND/OR gets close with another team member and acts as a sibling to them + what Kunigami’s reaction would be? Idk if you do sequels and if not that’s ok! Thank yewwww either way!

Ohhh I love doing sequels!! Also thank you a lot!! Your sweet words mean a lot to me💟

Requests open! - NEL assistant masterlist

Part 1 (meeting Kunigami again)

Tags: gn!older sibling!reader, a bit of angst I think?, somewhat hurt/comfort

-after trying over and over, you just gave up on trying to get your brother's attention. He always either ignores you or tells you to leave him alone

-to you, feeling the pain of being ignored or rejected again and again was too much, so you decided to stop and focus on spending time with your coworkers and the rest of the team instead

-you got particularly close with Isagi and you quickly became best friends. Outside of your working hours, you're almost inseparable. He actually becomes almost like a brother to you

-he lets you vent about your younger brother whenever you need to. He knows how much it hurts to see what your brother turned into

-Kunigami is always jealous if he sees you so close to Isagi. No matter if it's because you're assisting him during his training or if you're hanging out with him after work, Kunigami hates seeing how close you two became

-your brother knows he should be in Isagi's place. He knows he should be the one talking to you so much. And he knows he's hurting you by ignoring and rejecting you all the time - especially because he heard you telling Isagi about it

-and still, something always holds Kunigami back from properly talking to you. His jealousy actually makes him even more absent because he internalizes his feelings so much

-he notices how you don't even try to talk to him anymore. It makes him feel worse because he just knows it's his own fault

-one day, he decides it's time to talk to you again. He really wants to apologize. But for some reason, instead of apologizing, he tells you to leave Blue Lock again. As if he hasn't told you that countless times

-he wants you gone from this place for multiple reasons. First, he hates that you get to see what he turned into. Second, he hates how close you got to Isagi and treat him like you used to treat Kunigami. And third, he hates not being able to properly talk to you even though you're so close because something inside of him always hold him back.

-and that's exactly what he tells you when your conversation escalates into an argument. He actually yells it at you, and while it's in an aggressive tone, you can also hear the jealousy and desperation in his voice

-hearing all of that makes you cry. Even though he didn't say it explicitly, finally hearing something that implies your brother still loves and cares about you makes you extremely emotional

-Kunigami doesn't really know what to do, but as soon as he sees your tears he stops yelling and pulls you into a hug

-he doesn't apologize yet, but him wrapping his arms around you is enough to know he's sorry for hurting you

[maythedreadwolftakeyou]

tagging for Veilguard moving forward

now that i've finished the game! i am going to be rebloging more content over here since i can finally Look At It. I WILL still be tagging anything plot or character arc related as #datv spoilers and #da4 spoilers. ive been throwing more/other tags than that in previously but its tiring and most people i know have now finished so, just those two from here on out.

I haven't been tagging spoilers on art that's just of characters, settings/locations that aren't major plot points, or broad strokes memes/comments about character personalities. This will stay the same. All this will still be tagged under the general tag of #dragon age: veilguard.

i'll still throw my personal thoughts, screenshots, headcanons, and if i decide to do an fanfic/fanart under my tag #jade plays dav. i'll probs make additional Rook's though idk if i will do more full playthroughs of the game anytime soon (i cannot explain how behind i am at work right now. whoops), characters will each get their own tags as i name them but the above will be the catch all for all my playthroughs. I will be posting more photo mode screenshots too under #my screenshots which will have spoiler and relationship tags as befits.

I may also use other general purpose tags may in addition here and there like #dav memes, or for subsorting purposes like #dav banter, BUT i am not reliable with these as i mostly only bother when i'm at my laptop vs on my phone lol.

Complaints or criticism of the game will be #dav critical. honestly i did not like the writing, worldbuilding choices, and writing decisions/directions for the characters in quite a lot of this game. I've been focusing mostly on just the parts i DO enjoy for liveblogging purposes but for the next few weeks I will probably have more criticism on here than I usually do while I work through all my thoughts on this. I didn't HATE the game and this will not become a hateblog by any means but it was simply not a game For Me in most ways, and got rid of a lot of my favorite things about the series. idk right now i'm mentally treating this game as a surface level fun romp from which i will extract lore/headcanons and ignore... a lot of the tone/direction of the game itself. i am simply chosing to close my eyes and ignore it/rewrite things in my head to suit myself better, because i play these games for my own enjoyment, and that is how i am going to best enjoy this installment at this point.

[spooky-momth]

I'm probably gonna be a bit of a hypocrite for saying this and I never want to rain on anyone's parade but I think. For me, it's less the shipping focus but more so the fact that friendships never get any focus, or like the non-romantic parts of a relationship

Like I'm a big Polyhatz and Fireskulls fan but first and foremost I love their dynamics with each other, how they bounce off each other and the care they clearly have for each other as friends -- that's what makes the ships so good!! They have that bond before and then when the actual crushes and romantic affection happen it feels so natural

I'm a sucker for slow burn. I want to see the steps between the first meeting and the first kiss, dammit, don't just show me the romance!!!

Also just- this is kinda related but in a different way. I will never forgive SM AO3 for putting both Kevin/Streber and fucking Bob x Reader above Skid & Pump in fic count. I swear like half of the SM AO3 tag is smut fics and it is SO frustrating that this world and it's characters are so cool and interesting to explore yet all anyone wants to write about is the same few characters boning. I've grown numb to it at this point but it's also why I rave so highly about fics like Roy Against Society or Not So Bad After All, because they're actual character and in RAS' case, plot focused fics!!

(disclaimer: I am not dissing Candybats or the Bob selfshippers. I find Kevin/Streber to be a fun ship under the right circumstances and people wanted to smooch the cannibal so bad they made a full-ass game for it, I am in no place to diss them)

I just. Idk. Does this make any sense?? I'm tired as hell I don't know if what I'm saying makes any sense but I'm going to drop it in your inbox Anyway because I have Thoughts about this. Maybe I'll send another ask when I'm not so tired, idk

HI sorry this has just been sitting in my inbox for DAYS hgshfgj. you know how it is with college, and then The Other Horrors, Also.

disclaimer for anyone else: sometimes we just wanna complain about things. this isn't an indictment of your fandom experience, go have fun and live your life, we're not your moms, etc etc.

all of that out of the way- YEAH. true. (my reply also gets long, so to spare your dash I put a cut here.)

I don't think it's 'hypocritical' to have a nuanced take on something, really. You can like things in multiple ways and it's no betrayal of yourself to be like that!

I've always been fascinated with romance as a concept (especially as an aromantic; it always seemed like some kind of fantasy thing, like magic, to me.) but as time's gone on I've found myself more interested in what a romance can bring to the table than the romance itself.

Like, for example- Part of the reason I've been putting off Candlelight for so long is that I… still need to figure out the finer details on WHY Carmen and Lila actually get together, despite that being the "central premise" of the AU. Whoops!

I've got a lot of stuff planned out for how Roy & Skid adapt to it, what their feelings are about their new moms, about each other- But the leading romance has NOTHING LMAO.

and… fair. I get it as someone who's been on both sides of that battle in the Deltarune fandom. I was both the rabid reader looking for x Readers and the exhausted reader filtering everything that wasn't a Gen fic out so I could find something I actually wanted to see.

It can be frustrating to find so many threads that canon leaves for you to pull on, but look around and have it feel like no one else is interested in it.

(Also, I need to check both those fics out soon, thanks for reminding me, hehe.)

Romance is an interesting lens to view the show from, yes, but it's also not the ONLY lens and it can be tiring when that seems to be the majority of what people write.

[keibea]

Get to Know Me - Sims Style

i was tagged by @amuhav because she loves me and knows i love doing these things

what's your favourite sims death?

ngl i dont actually have one, im terrified of any of my babies dying so they never do...but i guess old age maybe? because that means theyve lived a long life and ive played with them for a long time?

alpha cc or mm?

alpha HANDS DOWN...i dont hate mm by any means dont get me wrong, but ill always be an alpha girl at heart. its the alpha hairs, they always get me.

do you cheat your sims weight?

only if it fits their character i guess? not usually in gameplay.

do you move objects

i move objects every single day.

fave mod?

ooofff i mean out of necessity? nraas. but just the one i love? hands down pose player. mostly because i was so excited when i finally got it to work (i was like 13 or something and before then i could not figure out how to get mods to work) so a lot of happy memories from finally getting my sims to pose.

first expansion/game pack/stuff pack?

my first ever was sims 2 glamour life stuff pack when i was a kid. if we're talking sims 3, i believe the first pack i got was generations, which is still my favourite sims pack ever.

do you pronounce live mode like aLIVE or LIVing?

i pronounce it LIVE, always have as far as i know.

who's your favourite sim that you've made?

well, its gotta be elodie honestly. she and eli are the longest sims i have ever had and i love them both dearly. in the sims 4, its gotta be my girl pippa. before tumblr? i had this family called the moretti's, i miss them and i think about them way too often. i loved them all.

have you made a simself?

oh yeah. loads of times. i think ive shared my sims 3 and sims 4 variations on tumblr (but they look really weird tbh). i love making myself, cause then i can wear all these clothes i cant afford in real life.

favourite ea hair

im with aimee on this one.

im mostly joking, but usually sims 3 hairs are a no go for me, except for some store ones and the hairs that are pulled back into buns always look really nice. for sims 4, only the newer ones. the older ones are not for me.

favourite life stage?

young adult. i feel like you can always do more with young adult sims and you have so much more time (except in sims 1 i believe?and sims 2 only if u went to uni?? idk). 90% of my sims are forever young adults because i love that life stage so much.

are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

mate ive been trying to build for donkeys years to no avail. so im almost always in it for the gameplay.

are you a cc creator?

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA BAHAHAHA HA once upon a time bro maybe. your girl tries to be, but uni is a pain in my bottom, and sims 3 loves making my life difficult.

do you have any simblr friends or a sim squad?

somehow i do?? more friends then irl anyway. the girl gang is @thesimperiuscurse , @lazysunjade & @amuhav these 3 have put up with me despite my crazy personality for an incredibly amount of time and i love them all dearly. but i have so many friends on here its crazy (more than 3 people its incredible!). obviously they havent seen my real personality yet. besties include: @catharsim , @plumbobem , @johziii , @rollo-rolls , @moonsonnet , oh gosh im forgetting people I AM SO SORRY I LOVE U ALL SO MUCH

do you have any sims merch?

bro i wish, but no money. spent it all on anno 1800. no regrets.

do you have a youtube for sims?

i believe formally i do, but i dont post anything. i do have some ideas if i ever wanted to, but my adhd brain couldnt cope being consistent so i probably never will.

how has your "sims style" changed throughout your years of playing?

as in sims or gameplay? idk ill talk about both. gameplay wise, not much, except im weirdly a lot more controlling then i was over my sims WHOOPS. but i still cant get passed gen 2 so that hasn't changed. but i still prefer family gameplay, probably always will. and challenges, always challenges. sims wise? a lot.

this is one of the earliest sims i have photo evidence of. this was in 2018 i believe?

whose your favourite cc creator?

the people that are the cause of most of my cc obsession are @kerriganhouse , @rollo-rolls , @johziii , @joojconverts & @martassimsbookcc and probably a few more but mind blank

how long have u had simblr?

since 2020. one of the longest things ive ever committed to.

how do you edit your pictures?

with my blood, sweat and tears. im not joking, a lot of sweat and tears goes on when im editing.

what expansion/gamepack is your faveourite?

of all time? generations, no doubt in my mind. i never had any sims 1 or sims 2 expansions, so i never got to experience those unfortunately. generations was perfection though. i mean, boarding school? lifesaver. also led to the best sims series of all time: lifesimmer's generations. for sims 4 though? probably get together, purely because of the world.

[lunarriviera]

9 people you want to know better!

Thanks for the tag @lonelylonelyghost 😚

Three ships: oh god anyone who knows me already know this but: zhoudu (mo du/justice in the dark), chengyi (under the skin) and pingxie (dmbj), i feel so obvious and simplistic and tacky—

First ship: this will tell you how old i am, but batman/catwoman from the 1966 series; also robin hood/maid marian from the 1973 disney movie, which was the first movie i ever saw. later and for most of my life it was kirk and spock, even though i didn't know what that meant.

Last song: all weekend i was hung up on "emily i'm sorry" by boygenius but also i had a dive back into "suburban legends" (from 1989) and billie eilish: "the greatest," "skinny," and most of all: "chihiro" with which i'm obsessed, i want to make a hundred edits with it. (i want to make edits all the time but it's just so time consuming...)

Last movie: probably one i taught in the spring semester? we ended with everything everywhere all at once, which the students loved. i haven't really watched movies this summer. but my bff and i are going to see shichinen no samurai on a big screen at the art museum this weekend and I AM BESIDE MYSELF WITH EXCITEMENT.

Currently reading: ten danmei at once (case file compendium and little mushroom, also qjj and spl and erha as each book comes out) but then i got distracted by an accidental mo du reread, waylaid when i went into the pdf just to search for a quote and whoops now it's three days later and i'm nearly finished with book 4, and also wrote a ten-page meta last night that i don't know what to do with? how did this happen to me? why does this novel GET TO ME?

Currently watching: i stalled out like halfway through kinnporsche for no clear reason other than that they're happy and it's kind of a nice place to stop? because i'm pretty sure all holy hell is about to break loose and the thai mob is going to try to crush their young love. but look, here they are being happy boyfriends! a nice place to end it.

idk i keep bouncing off dramas but i really want to watch killer and healer, the chinese hikaru no go, and finish the spirealm. my MDL watchlist literally has 70 things on it, it's so tragic T_T

Currently eating: a square of dark chocolate with iced coffee, but i should go make lunch, i just don't want to cook anything, it's hot

Currently craving: another extra month before the fall semester starts in two weeks and i have to teach. can i just have july back pls

tagging: @omaenanimonoda @programmedradly @lquacker @elenothar @theredshoes @aadikah @catholicjigglypuff @emmajanereading @tehfanglyfish and anyone else who likes <3

[katatonicimpression]

10 Questions for Writers

1. How many works do you have on ao3?

33 (40 including anons)

2. What’s your total ao3 word count?

103,994

3. What fandoms do you write for?

My published fics are a pretty even split between marvel comics and mcu, with any other fandoms being dumped in anon.

4. Do you respond to comments?

I usually say thanks to positive comments, never really had a conversation in a comment section cba with that

5. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge.

6. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, don't know if I could cope with that. I could edit the shit out of someone elses though.

7. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Sambucky (mcu), it's the one I always come back to

8. What are your writing strengths?

I think a lot of the dialogue I write is funny. At least, it's very funny to me and other people tend to at least chuckle at it.

I've had some positive feedback about characterisation and tone (i.e. that they feel in character and that the vibes are good) and that makes me happy because I do often feel like I'm really on a roll with that kind of thing.

9. What are your writing weaknesses?

Aside from barely writing a word for months?

I write too short. Major problem of mine since school days. I tend to understate my points by rushing past them and don't let the story have time to sink in.

I am bad at plot. I have been challenging myself to write more structured short stories with, like, acts and stuff. And while I think i've been doing ok on that aspect, the part of plotting I clearly still struggle with is thinking of an interesting reason for anything to be happening. So often it's just a backdrop for conversations between characters and it's so clear that I didn't care enough to think of something actually entertaining.

I also sometimes end up writing too much dialogue. Like, whoops maybe some things should be happening here instead.

10. First fandom you wrote for?

First fandom I ever published fanfic for? MCU Sambucky a couple of years ago, just before the show started (since orphaned lol that one was bad). I got started pretty late.

In terms of non-published extensive daydream fics, idk like forever ago. Probably x-men evo or, like, bbc robin hood.

Thanks for the tag! @jemgirl86