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aladaylessecondblog · 8 months ago

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Red Mountain Waffle House, pt. 14

Author's Note: Angst & misunderstandings

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Somehow or the other she had been drawn to the Shrine of Azura. Before falling in with that group of former slaves in Zebabi, Sadara had looked into where the shrine was, and figuring Azura would have some answers, headed over that way.

The priests sold her some glow dust, and she made the offering as the sun was going down.

"Azura," she said, "I don't ask for you to do me any favors - I just want answers. With the prophecies, and all that - was I the Nerevarine? I mean clearly I'm not fulfilling them, so did I have ANY purpose here? What was it?"

There was a pause, a slight breeze, and then a voice in her mind.

"You have served the purpose I set out for you."

"What purpose?"

"You ensured Nerevar's bones were brought to Dagoth Ur." A pause. "There have been many Nerevarines, and you were meant to be the last. So many have failed, and you remain...the cycle repeated, in my vain hope one of you would follow the prophecies. But there have been too many failures - and so I have chosen a different path."

"What path?" Sadara felt her stomach drop. You have served your purpose.

"Nerevar will surely follow my will and destroy the Tribunal; he was ever faithful in life, and I see no reason that his loyalty should fail now. I am glad of your assistance, but your part in this is done."

She turned away without saying anything more.

Fuck Azura. Fuck everyone...except maybe Jiub.

Nothing had changed. Nothing would ever change.

----------------------

Traveling about and killing cliffracers was okay for a week or so, but on using her name in Molag Mar, she'd drawn some attention. The healer had looked up, and gone, "Sadara? What're you doing here?"

"Working," she said, "Cliffracer plumes sell for a decent amount."

"You're working? Why?"

"For a living? Why does anyone work?" she shrugged.

"There are some people looking for you--"

The moment her wounds were closed she left, and bought a cloak to cover herself a bit better on the way out. Why would they be looking for her? They had the bones, the moon-and-star, the heirloom ring of Dagoth Ur's. What more could they want her for? Gilvoth had made pretty clear she wasn't wanted there. But then something else occurred to her--the Tribunal temple would probably want to see her gone still, despite her showing no inclination to fulfill the prophecies. She'd handed over Nerevar's bones, they might have linked her to the one who'd stolen the bones in the first place...b&e, theft, some sort of heresy charge, that'd put her away for a while. And that was if the ordinators didn't outright kill her.

Whatever goodwill she'd built with Vivec when she'd done that favor of getting the tattoo was surely burned away now...and Almalexia, she was another thing entirely.

She left Molag Mar, and thereon stopped using her name.

When she cleared the slavers' cave of Zebabi and freed the khajiit and argonians, they had asked her name. She'd thought for a moment, and said, "Nammu."

Finding out about Fyr's offer to pay for blood had come as a result of one of the argonians, Chalureel, who'd said the slavers had dragged him up to Fyr to give his blood. He was some rare type or the other, and seemed overwhelmed with the idea that the sum paid to the slavers would go to him now.

Sadara agreed to stay with them until they all figured out what they'd do with their newfound freedom. The presence of a Dunmer could handwave some things away, avoid some types of trouble...

The morning after she cleared the cave she asked Chalureel to go up to Tel Fyr with her.

"It's a city unto itself," he said, after giving a description of the route they'd need to take, "There's a lot of things there we could get ahold of, especially if your blood's a type they want."

Fyr was a reclusive sort, but those that worked for him obviously needed places to stay, and a tiny medical school of excellent reputation had popped up, and then there were all the services THEY needed--

The point being, there would be plenty of places to hawk what they didn't need of the slavers' things, and to buy what supplies they needed. She'd sold enough bandits' gear after coming to Morrowind to have a reasonably good discerning eye on the most common stuff. Daggers, leather armor, spell scrolls.

"Alright, so do we have enough water here? Not the salt kind," Sadara said, "How many bedrolls do we need to buy? You all deserve to sleep on more than just the ground like you've been doing."

A list was put together of the things they'd need, and while she and Chalureel were going to Tel Fyr, the rest would head to the shore to do some fishing and foraging.

"It rains fairly frequently here," Chalureel said, "So a rain barrel might be a good idea. The water in the cave...is not exactly clean, because of those slaughterfish the--slavers were keeping. We could boil it, but..."

"We can buy some bottled water at Tel Fyr and get a rain barrel, or something like it, and boil the water here if it's absolutely necessary. There's some cooking supplies here, so we've got a pot for it...we've got the list, so let's head out."

The blood donation didn't take all that long. It was mainly filling out the forms and negotiating for things other than money that took extra time.

In exchange for a reduced payment she managed to wrangle out getting a couple potions and to be taught Restore Health with the first donation of her own blood. Fireball she figured would be next - that would make the campfires a bit easier to start up. Then a frost spell, so they could have form up a crude refrigerator somewhere in the cave.

They were kept another hour and give some orange juice, and healed up just to be safe. Then they went shopping.

The rain barrel angle didn't pan out, but they got several jugs and bottles of water, as well as some dried fish, a couple kwama eggs, saltrice, and some shein. A box of rations from a surplus store. It felt like a wealth of food, what was in that box...

But the real treat came when she spent what she'd put aside for herself. It wasn't much, only twenty gold, but she got a new robe, the first bit of clothing she'd bought in ages that wasn't from a secondhand store.

And a green candle. There had been red ones. Smelling them had given a scent of cinnamon and memory of Jolene--Dagoth Ur, her mind corrected her. That look in the picture that had buoyed her for a little while, made her feel adored, what might have been the first stirrings of love, but which now--

Surely you understand it has always been Lord Nerevar that he wants?

The words reminding her that she was to stay in her place, that she was not to reach for anything better.

She put the red candle back and hurried along with Chalureel, whose own treat seemed to be four bags of cheese puffs. The remainder that they weren't saving went to a couple bottles of soda and some off-brand chocolate the others liked.

At last they headed back, and she thought that evening, on looking at what had been the slave pen and was now her room, that all things considered this was better than she'd had in a while, even if there wasn't any plumbing here.

It was a roof over her head, food in her stomach, and a safe place to sleep. That was all it used to take to keep her happy, and it would have to be enough now.

If she just kept believing it, maybe it would be true.

------------------------------------

When Jiub saw the golden-skinned mer approaching the Waffle House a week after the last sleeper, at first he wondered why an Altmer that clean was coming out here.

Then the door opened, and the new waiter dropped to his knees. "Saint Nerevar!"

"Rise," the mer, Nerevar apparently, replied, "I have--to speak to your cook."

"Of course, of course." The waiter moved in close and said, "Be on your best behavior."

"Right." Jiub shrugged, and the waiter headed off to clean the bathroom, or smoke, or something - he didn't really pay attention. Once the man was out of earshot he looked to Nerevar.

"Is Sadara not here? The Sleepers keep saying she doesn't work here any longer."

Jiub scoffed. "And their word wasn't good enough for you?"

"Where is she?"

"She doesn't live with me anymore, if that's what you mean. Do you want coffee? Eggs?"

"Where--where did she go?" Nerevar's voice was more insistent now.

"As if I'm going to tell you."

"Look--" Nerevar's tone went stern, in what Jiub supposed was his military-leader voice. "--you need to tell me where she is."

"Why should I do that?" Jiub turned, and kept one hand in his right front pocket, where he'd moved his box cutter to. "Huh? The volcano man not quite what you expected?"

"There has been a misunderstanding--"

"Misunderstanding!" Jiub laughed harshly. "Oh yes, Sadara didn't even come home afterwards, I'd say it was more than just a fucking--get out. Now."

"Who do you think you are?"

"The man who knows where she is. So I suggest you keep your hands to yourself. I fucked up your wife, I can fuck you up too."

"She's not my wife anymore, I don't--this isn't about her. I want to know where Sadara is, so I can bring her back to Red Mountain."

"What, to be mocked some more? Do you need a punching bag so you don't get bored?"

Nerevar glared in a way Jiub assumed was meant to intimidate him. It didn't work.

"That was never what was intended."

"Really, what was intended? Because whatever was said was bad enough she didn't even repeat it to me, and she tells me everything. Just said it was nothing we hadn't heard before." Jiub crossed his arms. "Why should I tell you fucking anything when you're the reason she's like this?"

"The person she talked to--did not--" Nerevar groaned, and buried his face in his hands before looking back up. "How do I convince you I don't mean her harm? I only want her to take the place that's rightfully hers now. I thought--we hadn't seen her, so we assumed she must not have been interested in being Lady Dagoth. Then one of the Sleepers let us know she DID show up, and we simply hadn't been told about it."

"Yeah, she delivered your bones," Jiub replied, "You'd think you'd be more grateful."

"I didn't KNOW! One of Voryn's brothers turned her away and--look, I just want to correct the situation. I want to make things right. Then you won't see me again."

"It's her seeing you I'm worried about. Why should I trust you, eh? Give me one good reason not to hurl your ass out like Jazz." Jiub thought for a few moments, then cracked his knuckles. "Tell you what...if you kick my ass well enough, I'll tell you where she is."

A pause.

"Are you game for it? Or are you a big golden chicken?"

-------------------------

The kagouti hunt was not going very well.

They had enough to eat, but Sadara had headed out into the blight storm since she was immune to the blight, saying it'd probably be a good idea to get some fresh meat anyway. The slaughterfish in Zebabi's water (Gish, oddly enough, seemed to think of them as children) were happy enough with scraps, but...leftovers surely weren't healthy for them

In reality she preferred not to while away her time in Zebabi. Even with the others around it was too quiet, and if things were too quiet she'd start thinking.

And if she started thinking, she'd just end up making herself miserable. No. Better to get outside and actually DO something, until she was tired enough she'd go right to sleep when she got back.

But the blight winds were thicker than usual--or at least, thicker than she was used to--and she found herself stumbling along the paths, groping along the rocky mountainside to keep a sense of which direction she was going in. She was almost afraid to pull out her phone. Suppose it blew away, in all this wind?

Sadara took another step, leaned harder when a gust of red ashy wind blew right in her face--and fell into darkness.

"FUCK!" she screamed, and thanked any gods who might be listening that she'd had the Fyr people teach her the Light spell last time she was up there.

It looked like she'd fallen into some kind of hallway...a long corridor, there were visible doors along it. She'd think it was a dwemer ruin if it wasn't for the tombish look about it, and the lack of brass accents.

She set her quiver down to mark the spot, and then headed down the hallway. The doors opened, and she saw ash pits, with offerings covered in dust. Clearly, no one had been here in ages and ages.

A ghost or two rose...but gave her only a look before meandering about the room.

Probably a really old Hlaalu tomb.

She'd been to one or two tombs and left small offerings, but had never actually seen the ghosts wandering around like people had reported. Here, though...they seemed to be everywhere here. Some of the older looking ones ignored her, while a young one or two followed her for a while. Most vanished when she looked at them directly.

Then she came to a larger room--and the ash pit here was much, much larger than any of the others she'd seen.

As with some of the others, a ghost rose from the ashes.

This one, rather than looking at her and then quickly away, fixed her with a keen gaze that didn't once break away.

"Who are you?"

"My name's Sadara," she said, "I'm sorry, I fell into the tomb from the outside. I don't mean any disrespect. ...though I assume you must all know that already, since no one's attacked me."

"You must have married into the house," the ghostly woman said. "There is no other explanation."

"This isn't a house Hlaalu tomb?"

A snort.

"Oblivion, no. This is a House Dagoth tomb."

Sadara immediately started to back out of the room. "Well, I guess...I guess I'm technically one of you, but the marriage...isn't going to last."

"Isn't going to last? When the one you married has been rude enough not to bring you here to introduce you to the family..."

"It wasn't the one I married, but one of his--brothers that told me." Sadara shrugged. "I married him drunk, his brother said it was a mistake, and with Nerevar there again--look, I'll get out of your hair."

"No, no, stay. Stay, tell me what happened. The man you married, was it one of Voryn's brothers?"

"It was Voryn himself, and one of his brothers to--why am I telling you? It's probably getting annulled soon, I won't be part of the House for much longer."

"You shouldn't let yourself be shoved out so easily. Any Lady Dagoth should be strong enough to form herself a place. Voryn's brothers have ever been overprotective of the family honor and nobility--they tried to push off Nerevar, and now they are trying to push off you. With the same tricks, I imagine. But just like Nerevar, you--"

Sadara turned and bolted out the door, back down the hallway, ignoring every attempt by the ghosts she passed to call her back.

Just like Nerevar.

All she wanted was to escape that name, to escape his shadow, but every attempt seemed to deepen the trap she was in.

How long do I have to live in his shadow?

-----------------------------

The blight storm hadn't let up in the least by the time she returned to the cave--and with her arm raised to protect her eyes she didn't nothing the ordinator standing just inside the cave. He stood straight and pointed his spear at her when she approached.

"Who are you?"

"S--Nammu, I live here!" Sadara corrected herself, "Don't tell me it's been seized!"

"Not seized. ...temporarily commandeered," the ordinator said, "Go inside...but there are more of us in there, and if you step out of line you'll be dealt with."

Great, she thought, just great. As if I needed more problems right now.

She went on inside, noting there weren't that many extra ordinators inside, or rather, not as many as she expected. Nuralg was the first to see her, and shook her head on being told the hunt hadn't gone well.

"This one could have told you it was a bad idea to hunt in blight winds. The only thing one can catch out there right now is a blight disease. Dinner will be ready in a bit...but there is someone occupying your room. You'll have to have a chat with her."

The her in question was entirely a surprise. No sooner did she open the little door (which was flanked by two more ordinators) than she laid eyes on--

"Queen Barenziah?"

"Sadara!"

Both were equally surprised to see one another. Sadara walked forward, trying to think of how to not explain the situation to her.

"What are you doing out here?" was the queen's first question.

"The job didn't pan out. What're you--this doesn't seem the kind of place you'd frequent." Sadara gave a faint smile.

"I was making a trip to Tel Fyr for an injection...I've got something called rheumatoid arthritis, and I would far rather have the doctors do it than trust the job to a maid or to my shaking hands. The blight storm grew stronger while we were trying to sail by, and...well, we took shelter here, not knowing anyone had already made it a home."

"It's not too bad here, provided you fluff your pillow up well enough. And have a good bedroll. Maybe it's a bit too quiet, that's my only complaint."

"Besides not having running water?" Barenziah laughed slightly. "It reminds me of the old days, but...I prefer not to go back unless necessary."

There was a pause, and for that silence Sadara thought that no more would be said.

But of course, she would later think, she could not be so lucky.

"Hunting cliffracers?" she asked, "I expected you could find another job waiting tables up in the north, with your experience."

"I wanted to get away from the region," Sadara replied quietly. She shrugged a moment later. "Lot of drama went on...Almalexia turned up, and there was...a time I got very drunk, and...it's all behind me now."

Barenziah fixed her with a Look.

"What?" she asked, "I think I actually prefer living here over that shithole I was living in. It's by the ocean, it rains more often, and..."

No response.

"I do pay attention to the online discourses, you know," the queen mother started again, "And I can put two and two together."

"I don't want to talk about it," Sadara replied quickly. "Please, let's just talk about something else."

Literally anything else. She simply wanted to keep her mind off the Situation. Eventually that ache would peter out and everything would be as it was before. Everything went down the drain anyway, eventually this would too.

"Answer a few questions, and then I will speak no more of it. I already know about this infamous marriage of yours, and I simply want to know--"

"Do I have a choice?" Sadara slumped slightly.

A few questions and then this'd be over. Barenziah would leave, and she'd get on making the best of this place.

"Did you get thrown out?"

"Not out of my apartment, no, I just didn't go back. There wasn't much to go back for."

"And Dagoth Ur?"

"I haven't seen him since the night the wedding happened. When I visited the--that palace he lives in, all I saw was his brother. If I hadn't left he'd have put me out."

"You poor thing," Barenziah's tone was sympathetic, "This is what I was trying to warn you about. These men will use you and cast you aside the moment you are no longer useful to them."

"I...I brought him Nerevar's bones. Thought we'd have to talk anyway. But...I guess he didn't want to talk..."

You have served the purpose I set out for you.

She gulped slightly. "Anyway...I suppose you'll be staying overnight. We can feed the lot of you, but it'll be a bit tight...not what you're used to, I'm sure."

"We've got some stores of our own to add, if you're inclined to make a stew. Or if you're not, I like my entourage to be well prepared." There was a pause. "I apologize for pressing, but...if you'd like the marriage annulled, I'm sure--"

"No, let him live with the stain." The venom in her tone surprised even Sadara, and she shook her head. "The only revenge I can have right now is that my name is still linked with House Dagoth. He has Nerevar now, and he'll want to marry him soon, which'll mean he'll want my signature on the divorce papers."

She'd seen how easy it could be to get a divorce in Morrowind. Thirty days apart--and they were fast closing in on that number--no matter how short a time it had been since the wedding--with papers signed, and that would be that.

It could be as if it had never been.

"Maybe I can get a bribe out of it. They want to call me a gold-digger, maybe I should just quit trying, and...and give them what they're--"

She took in a sharp breath.

Barenziah's open arms was all it took.

Sadara sank into them, sobbing, and wasn't aware of very much else for a long while afterward.

Just this time. I will let myself be sad just this time. But no one else will get to see it. No one else.

#fanfiction #morrowind #nerevarine #azura #fuck azura all my homies hate azura #jiub #nerevar #indoril nerevar #barenziah #tes #tesblr #elder scrolls

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haeanotnon · 1 month ago

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oc tag game :) tagged by @giselberts thank you!! You'll have to hear more about Oberyn because I'm obsessed with him😆

GENERAL

Name: Oberyn Nerevares

Nickname(s): Alder. This is a pet name that was traditionally given at birth in his family, intended for relatives and friends. He only received his "official" name at twenty, when he ran away from home for adventures and had to somehow introduce himself to strangers. For a while, he used the name Magnus :)

Gender: cis-male

Age: 86

Birthplace: Skyrim

Languages: I can't say for sure, he's pretty good at learning languages, but he's never studied them thoroughly, so he knows everything at different levels, having picked up a few here and there

Sexual orientation: bi, probably. Usually, he focuses more on whether he's interested in a person or not, and most often it turns out to be men.

Occupation: Adventurer and Healer.

FAVORITE

Color: Red, gold, blue :) He mostly likes bright colors, although the right black has its charm too.

Entertainment: He likes to wander here and there and meddle in other people's business. He likes to collect gossip, although he does not spread it further. To some extent, he is addicted to thrills. He plays gambling, but often loses, so he tries not to do it too often.

Pastime: Alchemy, he likes to mix ingredients, and create some new potions. Blacksmithing, although he is not very good at it, he makes his own arrows, and finds it quite meditative. And also embroidery :) He mainly fixes holes in leather, embroidering flowers on them, but if you give him enough free time, he can even swing at some tapestry.

Food: He eats EVERYTHING. from insects to tree bark, completely indiscriminate. But his favorite is probably fruits, apples and pears. He eats them with the pits too :')

Drinks: Also something sweet, wine or cider if he can choose.

Books: He likes diaries and biographies. Anything where other people express their thoughts.

HAVE

Graduated from university: He studied to be a doctor under another master, does that count?

Had sex in public: Haha, no :) He was too shy for it when he was younger, and then no one asked him.

Got tattoos: Nope, never had the chance. Although maybe he would have agreed if he was in the right mood, it would have taken him a long time to figure out what to get.

Got piercings: Oh yeah! He loves shiny things, so he has a lot of piercings in his ears, tongue and belly button.

Had a broken heart: when his daughter married an idiot :'). This is a joke (he thinks her husband is a good guy, although of course not without stupidity (he is biased, what can you do)) In general, he had to lose close people a couple of times, and he takes it very hard.

Was in love: yeah. A couple of times not bad, a few times very unsuccessfully, and once just great :))

THEY

Hugs: He's very tactile, although he's used to being more reserved at this age. He loves to cuddle and hold hands, and if you sleep in the same bed with him, you'll definitely wake up tangled :)

Easily scared: He's practically immune to scary things, but he can be easily startled by loud noises or flashes of light if he's not prepared for it.

Easily jealous: He's not jealous at all, and he believes in trusting people close to him, because who else?

Trustworthy: If you let him hold a glass at a party, he'll die for it.

FAMILY

Siblings: Uhhh, he doesn't have any siblings, but he does have a couple of aunts and uncles that he thinks of as siblings. One of his age, but was adopted by his grandfather, and therefore is formally considered his uncle, but they rarely remember this, and consider themselves brothers. (Oberin's mother calls him brother, although she is much older than him, but she mostly just teases him like that (Of course, with love) ) They grew up together and are extremely close. Then his grandfather had more children, and they are also formally considered his uncles and aunts, but they are younger than even Oberin's daughter, so he also considers them his younger brothers and sisters. He also has a couple of half-brothers from his father, but there is a complicated history there.

Parents: His father was practically not involved in his life, and Oberin does not know him very well. His mother, on the contrary, loves him very much and taught him a lot. Grandfather1, grandfather2 and grandmother also took part in his upbringing, although the latter appeared in their lives when Oberin was already a teenager. This is a loving, albeit chaotic family.

Children: Daughter Helga (Daisy). She was an accident (don't mix a huge amount of alcohol and nervous tension, kids), but she became a favorite child from the first moment. Oberyn didn't have a specific strategy for raising her (he was terrified and panicked, poor thing), so he tried to pay her as much attention as possible and teach her everything he knew. Mostly it was archery, knife throwing and alchemy😆 Although it can't be said that she didn't need it in the future.

Pets: Nope, although he feeds half of the stray cats of the Arc.

Thanks again ❤️❤️❤️

it took me a while but it was really interesting to think about :)

#enderal #enderal forgotten stories #oc: oberyn #enderal prophet

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trickstarbrave · 1 year ago

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im trying to get back into writing. i havent had much writing juices flowing in my brain :(((((

but here is vivi and steren in the au my brain cooked up yesterday (yeah my brain made yet another one.)

vivienne belongs to @mulberrycafe!!

Another night was over in the brothel, the sun rising, the windows and curtains drawn shut, and a few more coins hidden away by Vivienne. Steren was once again too exhausted to move from Vivienne’s bed, every inch of his body hurting.

It had been weeks, but no amount of sleep seemed to be healing his wounds. Normally he would have healed much more than this with sleep alone, though he knew the supernatural wounds inflicted by Dagoth Ur’s magic would need proper healing magic.

It was clear the madam knew he was a fighter by nature. A fighter with a very, very pretty face she was able to get her hands on that she did not want running away. No doubt his food was lace with poisons to keep the wounds open without festering, all his muscles feeling raw and his body sluggish. In a way, he supposed it was the right call--if he regained his strength he would have killed her and fled the moment he recovered. It didn’t matter if the bouncers tried to stop him and guards called for his arrest--he’d use levitation and stealth to hide from rooftop to rooftop until he got out of the city before running to the opposite side of Morrowind, then getting a boat to somewhere even further away.

But she didn’t want to lose something so valuable. Steren was one of her most popular ‘attractions’ outside of Vivienne. Vivienne likely didn’t even know why he was so popular--most of his regulars wouldn’t say. Perhaps they feared the wrath of the good daedra if they openly admitted out loud that they longed for the old temple and “communing” with Viviec.

They were not as quiet with Steren though.

“Disgusting Sharmat,” A customer swore, pinning him down while Steren grit his teeth. “Because of you my home was destroyed! All of Vvardenfell wiped clean because of you!”

Another grabbed Steren’s hair, tugging until he gave a sharp cry, before tugging his face close until they could enter his mouth. “Then having the gall to marry the hortator, acting like you own the whole damn temple!”

Steren shuddered just thinking about it. At least he learned that his parents were alive and well here, and yet…

Well. The Voryn and Nerevar of this world didn’t even know who he was. To all the people of Morrowind, Steren was just a dunmer with an uncanny resemblance to Voryn Dagoth, lord of the Sixth House. He must have been reincarnated too and found Nerevar, who had fulfilled the Nerevarine prophecy upon his reincarnation since there was no son of his for his spirit to watch over.

At times Steren fantasized about fighting his way out of this place, running all the way off to Mournhold, running into his parents’ awaiting arms. Getting his injuries patched up, Nerevar whispering reassuringly that he would take care of everything, Voryn stroking the hair from his face before feeding him congee with kwama eggs and calling him his little star again… Such sweet things helped relax him to sleep while Vivienne stroked his hair, a pleasant thought to soothe the pain in his body.

But it was just that--a fantasy. Nothing more or less.

Even if he did escape, he knew going to the temple would sooner get him arrested than an audience to the king or his consort. Why would they let a mysterious young man, filthy and battered from battle and weeks spent in a brothel speak to someone so powerful? Especially one with an uncanny resemblance to the king’s consort, with a blasphemous red mark on his forehead? If he said he was their son from another world he would be seen as insane and dangerous, locked up for good or shipped back to the brothel. And besides, he couldn’t even take Vivienne there, since he was told he shouldn’t ever set foot in the temple.

He’d just live with the comfort that his parents were alive and happy together. Happy, in love, not knowing he even existed let alone what he was going through so they didn’t have to worry.

Being content about his parents just being alive would be good to spite Azura too. No doubt after hearing his request to be with his parents, she sent him here as punishment deliberately. Just killing him and barring him entry from her realm would break her promise, after all, and ultimately not be that good of a punishment. Instead, forcing him to live with his unnaturally long lifespan and suffer, knowing he can’t be with the souls of his actual parents or see this world’s Nerevar and Voryn in the flesh was much more her style. But Steren wouldn’t give in to despair; she can punish him all she likes for being selfish and asking for that as a reward rather than agreeing to serve her for the rest of his life. He’ll find his own way to be happy, eventually.

Vivienne curled up beside him after hiding the money, Steren loosely wrapping an arm around the other dunmer. It wasn’t quite yet, but it would be soon after punishments were finished and everyone settled in to sleep and rest before tonight.

“Just a bit more.” Vivienne reassured him. Steren nodded, eyes still closed and too tired to open them.

He told Vivienne he could leave without him. Steren didn’t like being the reason Vivienne was stuck here longer than usual, but he also let Vivienne have any of his extra money as well that customers would ‘tip’ him with when they felt generous. He knew, even if it took months, that the wounds would eventually heal and he could regain his strength bit by bit. Constant poison was expensive after all, and the madam would eventually be lulled into a false sense of security, thinking Steren developed a disease from the constant stream of poison and wouldn’t be able to fight back. Once he got his magic and ability to fight back, he’d flee himself.

But sweet, sweet Vivienne hated the idea. If Vivienne was gone, Steren would be punished for it given the madam knew by now that they were close. And he also knew that if he was gone everyone would show Steren more attention and abuse him more.

“I know.” Steren replied, voice hoarse. “A bit more.”

#steren #steren nerevarine #vivienne dragonborn #vivi au #my writing

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changelingsandothernonsense · 6 months ago

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how does josh feel about house dagoth and dagoth ur?

Hello! Oooh some complicated feelings are definitely going on in Joshi's mind. Most of these feelings are not his own and there's a lot of mixing going on as he pieces everything together. Josh has always had dreams about faceless creatures and golden masks. Usually they are waiting in the shadows as he watches Sun's Death over and over again. Sometimes he hears the voice of a woman that he doesn't recognise and can't quite make out. Rarely does he see the creatures following him in the shadows. Just flashes of gold or an eyeless void. Nightmares run in his mother's family and Soul Sickness almost as frequently. It had always been something that was hidden, his mother would get them, as did her mother before her and so on. You just dealt with it. Josh wouldn't begin connecting these dreams and his apparent Soul Sickness directly to Dagoth Ur until after he'd spoken with the Urshilaku's Wise-Woman on the topic. This is because ever since he'd returned to Vvardenfell his dreams had become more vivid and the creatures have started coming out of the shadows. Speaking to him about things he didn't understand. Pulling him towards a volcano. It always starts the same way. A volcano towering before him, the pyroclastic flow hitting him like a wall, vaporising him with the heat and force of it all. Then the dream changes and he finds himself trapped in a dark chamber, something made of ash takes his tongue or a towering figure in a golden mask whispers sweet nothings to him as his body is violated with him being able to do a thing about it. He wakes up scared and confused every time. Yet he has no idea what he's seeing, only that whatever is happening involves this masked bastard inserting himself into his worst memories and high jacking them in some strange, twisted amalgamation of everything that has him quaking in terror.

He doesn't understand what he's saying. The masked figure's voice seems like it should be comforting, but all he feels is utter terror in his presence. He acts with a familiarity that Josh is uncomfortable with. Like he's taken the place of someone else and he's the only person who's aware.

He blurts something about this out by accident to Mehra Milo who suggests he might have Soul Sickness and should submit himself to the Temple. He tries to walk it all back by blaming the imagery on his alcohol habit. It does have him worried, however. Josh doesn't have another dream until he's travelling to the Urshilaku camp. This is where he learns who this masked stranger is and that he should be cautious. He has Soul Sickness, and this Soul Sickness would only worsen once he became one of the Ascended. He starts disappearing into the call of the hive. The call was constant and had him madly chanting hymns to the sixth house whilst writing verse in his own blood on the floor. At this stage, he's absolutely terrified of the Sharmat. All he hears every second of every day are the calls of the Sixth House. Calling him back to join them in service to Dagoth Ur. Arisen amongst the legions below. They keep calling him Nerevar.

He is not Nerevar and he is not the Nerevarine.

It is only when he finds himself taking refuge in Holamayan that he finds the connection. The reason he and so many other Dunmer are finding themselves unable to find a restful sleep. They all share the same blood. It had always been a fact that the Sero clan had trouble joining a Great House. They were a wealthy clan, generally speaking with most of their wealth derived from ebony mines on the mainland. They just could never seem to succeed in joining the Redoran. Something would always come up. Some technicality that excluded them from Great House politics, even when they were making bank. That was of course, until House Hlaalu started accepting clans like theirs in the late Third Era. Finding out that he's related to the main Dagoth line way far back during the First Era was not what he expected to find. Nor did he expect to find his father's line claim's the Hortator as their sire, then again it kinda is the literal translation of the name Ensirhaddon (our Lord has blessed us with a son). At this point he's just beyond confused. He isn't the religious sort and he certainly never bothered paying attention to his history lessons when he was a kid (well the parts that didn't involve the Dwemer anyway). He's confused and he needs more answers. So he steals the relevant tomes from the Dissident Priests and books it straight to the Urshilaku. Things wouldn't become clearer until he'd put on Moon-and-Star and found that he was still alive afterwards. Complete with some bastard First Era Warlord taunting him until he flakes and lets him gain full control. The merger never went to plan and Josh ultimately became the dominant personality, with Nerevar taking over when Josh is too exhausted to fight him off. It also gives him access to Nerevar's memories. This is when all the dreams start to click. Why he felt like he was "standing in" on someone else's intimate moments. Because he was. Love that fell into utter betrayal. That is what he was reliving through his Sleeper Dreams. Josh is meant to be a vessel, a puppet. He was never meant to be the one to face Voryn. He was just a convenient body for Nerevar to take control of in order to enact his revenge on all who'd wronged him. On all who wronged them. Josh has no say and no part in it. Not until he wakes up with his hands around that masked bastard's throat. Ultimately, Nerevar couldn't kill the man he loved again, even after all the betrayal and the curses and the destruction. He just couldn't do it. And Josh can feel all of it. He's trying his best to forget seeing the man he loved being carted away with no knowledge if Erra was even still here. He needed to forget in order to reach the Citadel. Then Nerevar took over just as he broke down from the realisation that Erra might not survive his injuries, only to find himself striking a killing blow to the man his less welcome head mate loved more than anything. A man- no a monster who's actions had most likely killed his husband. He feels Nerevar's love for the old Chimer Lord before being blinded by his own anger and sorrow. He drives Dagoth Ur into the magma below. A life for a life. The cavern collapsing around him. He feels nothing but deep sorrow over the whole ordeal and it isn't all Nerevar's. Something stuck with him too as they both grieved their losses and licked their wounds. In the centuries since, Josh has been better able to separate his feeling's from Nerevar's. It was not his sorrow to hold yet everything hurts. He still has dreams where he connects to what remains of the infected after Red Year, always seeking him out in the darkness. He's the only heir of House Dagoth left who has this hive connection. His subjects want him to come home and take control.

They're his inheritance after all.

#Apologies for a long post #Josh is like an observer of Nerevar's life #and hes so confused about it all #danger!josh #voryn dagoth #indoril nerevar #nerevarine #morrowind #Sleepers Awake is very much intended to play into the horror elements in Morrowind

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iamnotshazam · 9 months ago

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I'm playing through Morrowind for the first time (gently modded) and let me tell you what. Even though I know all the main quest spoilers for the game, the tone and presentation are still intriguing as hell. (as Coldharbour? as the Deadlands? anyway)

I don't necessarily wish I was playing blind instead, because if I hadn't looked up spoilers and how the game handled prophecy and identity, I probably wouldn't bother playing an infamously clunky 2002 game. But one thing important to note is, if playing blind, it would be driving me absolutely crazy wondering who the goddess at the start was.

And it's delightfully disturbing to me that, staying generally out of Daedric circles so far, my money would be on Almalexia. Briefly went to Mournhold, learnt she was Nerevar's wife. And she stays out of public sight. She was nice until recently but then got agressive or something. And she's the goddess the game actually bothers hyping up a bit, if you go to the Temple or to Mourhold. Who else, really? Don't know much about the 'anticipations' yet but Boethiah and Mephala don't seem to care much about the mortals they pay attention to. 'Watchful' they ain't. Azura in books my character has read so far is said to care but she's also vain, so wouldn't she want me to know it was her? And those Nine Divines ladies could be behind this, which may be how the Emperor guy knew to get the ball rolling, but aren't they, like, dead or something? And at this point it's clear the "drive outlanders out of Morrowind" bit everyone says about the Ashlander prophecy may be misinformation. Maybe Almalexia is trying to swoop in and intercede the Nereverine cult?

#morrowind #elder scrolls #azura #almalexia

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pretentious-art-love · 7 months ago

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Game Reviews #1 - Morrowind

I have the theory that is is likely the best game Bethesda ever did and everything that came afterwards its just a repeat of what they achieved here. The side content ranges from fetch quests to some okay and interesting stuff, but what tops it all is the main quest, there is a sense of discovery not only exploring wise, but in a narrative sense as well.

The story is also tied to the sense of progression and leveling up, you start as a prisoner who is sent to work as a spy by the emperor, and there is a mystery you have to unveil, since you are a spy, you have to make a cover identity on your own, and the game tells you to do side content on your own and level up to get better at what you do, and better yet, it is all part of your mission, your cover identity, there is no weird sense of immersion breaking urgency like in Cyberpunk where you are dying and it just feels off when you want to explore, or like in Breath of the Wild where they say Ganon is about to break free and you are collecting dragonflies for a girl and her sister, Morrowind gives you the perfect mood to explore and do your own story and it only gives you the information you need at the final of the quest when things are about to go wild.

Morrowind also features a more natural and realistic depiction of the chosen one narrative, since this time you have to convince people and go through several tests instead of being told you are the one and being believed as such by others as a matter of fact, you have to win it, you have to convince them with actions, mere words don't do, people are very apathetic about the prophecy because naturally they don't believe it and just want to see results from you, people in Morrowind are all about to see to believe, and weirdly enough, even when it reduces the power fantasy factor, it makes the story feel a lot more real.

The lore is amazing and everything you hear about the Disappearance of the Dwarves is just neat, it is the kind of cryptic shit that scrambles my brain, the mystery about the real truth of the death of Nerevar, that weird wizard dude that clones his wives, the cult and the use of the Kagrenac tools by the tribunal and Dagoth Ur, it's just so good, it's all so good.

Also, no quest markers whatsoever. I first felt it was frustrating not knowing where to go, but Morrowind taught me about how rewarding the sense of exploration can be, and the sense of freedom that comes with it, no compass telling you where to go, its all about your own story, you get clues and get to discover things, beautiful things, scary things, unbelievable things.

The gameplay is fantastic too, there are just so many things you can use to achieve your goal, sure, the RNG combat is weird at first, the stamina use when walking is weird too, but the more you level up the more satisfying it becomes to hit more frequently, you can either specialize in long blades, or you can use stealth, the magic system is vast and full of possibilities. I was sad first when I used all my Icarian flight scrolls and I couldn't find any on the game, but then I learned you can do a spell to increase your jump and reduce your weight and boom, I was able to make a bootleg icarian flight spell myself, jumping from mountain to mountain. It is all about those little tricks and things you can do, the abilities, the possibilities that just add to the repeatability, the ability to levitate between cities, using the voice of the emperor to charm others, it is just all so good, so good.

Some of the lore was taken along with for the next games, but, I feel this is the only game for me worth exploring. I do like the nordic inspired landscapes, but I haven't felt the drive to explore them when its approach feels so soulless, and while Oblivion and Skyrim are the definition of what I would call generic fantasy, Morrowind's world is creepy and alien, it is scary and wonderful. The steampunk inspired Dwarf ruins, the construction in Sadrith Mora and the closer islands, the open maze that can be Vivec city, the houses made of stone and the manor district of Aldrun, the skeleton warrior filled castle of Firemoth, the altars in the Sixth House bases, the master index forts, that bonelord between the lava I found in a cave raiding one of my trials, it is all so good, so good!

While Daggerfall aimed at a sense of freedom and size with the procedurally generated world, Morrowind uses the manual approach and gives you locations that are all lovely handcrafted one by one without cramming up so many things in a small space, still giving you a big land to wander around and sight-see, Morrowind is the joy of being lost and discovering a place for the first time, to discover something beautiful or incredible after hours of walking, to find a lost fella and help them along the way for then discover the witch that cursed him was actually in the right, Morrowind is about dying, about fight your way in, Morrowind is about having an adventure, and it is one of my favorite games right now.

Plus Dagoth Ur is a pretty hot monster husbando. His aura is unmatchable.

10/10

#morrowind #elder scrolls #bethesda #todd howard #rpg #open world #fantasy #action rpg #game review #magic

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mareenavee · 2 years ago

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For the Asks to Spread Love, pick and answer 3 that you haven't been asked already! 🧡

Hello again, bri!! Thanks for sending more of these for me! I've really enjoyed catching up on them and thinking through these today!

Fandom Positivity asks from this game here.

10. A popular character you actually really like and why.

I do like me some rare characters most of all lol. My perspective is a bit biased because I love the ones I love and I don't mind if they aren't "popular" per se. (:

LOL -- The obvious answer is Teldryn, right? But I'm gonna talk about

💫Neloth 💫

instead.

I think he's popular to dunk on because he's been a very big pain in the ass in the games for centuries to everyone who will listen to him. I mean, since the events of Morrowind at minimum. (:

Why do I like him? Because of how he's been written by myself and a few friends -- namely @thana-topsy, @paraparadigm (TOOTHPICK!), and @thequeenofthewinter.

I love to see how other people take this character and run with what we're given in text ESPECIALLY considering how ridiculous he is to deal with and his general attitude toward other living things.

For myself, where I write him as a long term friend of Nerevarine!Teldryn Sero, I love to use his character as an opportunity to talk about the struggle of redemption. How does one redeem themselves from a lifetime of difficult choices made to fit into a specific perception? Does this perception eventually end up becoming a core facet of who you are as a person? If that is the case, can you change? Are the consequences of your choices enough to make you irredeemable? Further, can you forgive yourself if change does not come easily or if you return to old behaviors much too easily?

He's a complicated one, I think, especially by the events of Skyrim. He's not exactly estranged from the rest of House Telvanni, but the connection is tenuous and fraught as the House is still, apparently, recovering from the Red Year. In Morrowind it was very much the opposite. There's gotta be a kind of grief to this shift under the uncaring, hyperfocused exterior.

He's annoying, yes, but very interesting to me, and so he's in my fic. And he's actually a huge part of the latter half of the book.

11. Recommend a fic with an unusual/original headcanon or characterisation that you loved.

OH I'm SHOUTING OUT @changelingsandothernonsense's Danger!JOSH (aka Nerevarine Teldryn Sero)'s Nerevar-as-a-parasite situation in Serious Mistakes.

This angry spirit, more or less, lives in the ring and speaks into Teldryn's BRAIN and sometimes drives the entire car, so to speak and I've never ever read anything like it, holy shit. I'm a beta reader for this particular project and I literally cannot yell about it enough.

It's a novelization of the Teldryn Serious mod which was already intriguing, but AH. MY GOODNESS the Nerevar situation.

Let me show you. From chapter 4:

Aren’t you meant to be looking for something? “Oh, you’re still here?” Teldryn rasped, as if saying it out aloud mattered here. You should be thanking me. Teldryn grunted in annoyance, he had a point, he hated it when he was right. His mouth was dry. He wanted to stay where he was. Sleep. You can’t stay here! Get up! Teldryn groaned. Right again – the tide was coming in, if he didn’t find what he was looking for now, then it would be gone by morning. He needed his keys. Was there an Argonian on the beach? He couldn’t remember. His head hurt. He pinched the bridge of his nose, it did little to relieve the pressure. He always overdid it on the magicka, and now he was nauseous.

It's fucking cool, isn't it? (:

19. Give kudos to someone who leaves great comments.

OH GLADLY. Here's where I shout out @polypolymorph!!!

Okay so I could pick out a bunch of comments -- or novel-length responses. Each comment turns into an opportunity for a conversation and I'm always beside myself to hear back from her.

But right now, I'm still grinning ear to ear over, you guessed it. Eyestalks. Eye. Stalks.

(on this project here.)

#AskMareena #Positivity Asks #Neloth #Teldryn Sero #Nerevarine Teldryn Sero #Nerevar #indoril nerevar #Serious Mistakes #serious mistakes of solstheim #skyrim #morrowind #skyrim fic #Teldryn Serious #tes #tesblr #fanficblr

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whitegoldtower · 9 months ago

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Yippee doing one more loredump about my sad Nerevarine

On a positive note, they do have their own personal afterlife. One made for them by Azura, herself, who - even though Balaarys forsook her and she cursed him - still loved the Nerevarine, and was moved by his love for Voryn Dagoth.

I keep saying that Nerevar’s feelings for Voryn were amplified in Balaarys, but I think a better phrasing would be this: Balaarys is the part of Nerevar that loved Voryn. He’s the embodiment of a doomed love. Like I said; he was written to hit the ground, brutally.

But!! In this afterlife, Voryn is alone in it for years until Balaarys finally dies, reliving his past in a reconstructed dream of Red Mountain, dying ofer and over again to faceless white haired Nerevarines… until Balaarys actually shows up.

Voryn is ready to fight again, used to the routine, but it caught off guard by Balaarys just walking towards him, quietly singing the song.

The song is like an instant balm, soothing both of them as it echoes around this dream of the heart chamber, quenching Voryn’s isolated madness and quelling Balaarys’ shock at his own death.

Singing the song soothes Balaarys because he’s completing his unfinished business, singing it to Voryn’s face. And it soothes Voryn because now he knows exactly who Balaarys is.

“You are the embodiment of his love for me. You aren’t Nerevar anymore; you are love, itself.”

(new Dunmeri daedra just dropped? A little scion of Azura representing the process of remembering (the transition between forgetfulness and remembrance), the immortality of a love remembered?)

To which Balaarys once more removes Voryn’s mask to speak directly to him, so that Voryn can’t hide. Balaarys speaks the words he said to Dagoth Ur’s body after killing him.

“We should have lived away from Vvardenfell together. We could have. You would have had me. A heart given freely to you. A heart you would not have needed to steal. Your moon and star. My sun and sky. We could have had it… you idiot.”

These words completely stun Voryn. It takes a moment for him to gather his thoughts enough to respond. But the key here isn’t speaking.

Voryn needs to remember. And the last thing he remembers is a pair of lips upon his own. A pair of lips he couldn’t kiss back.

So he kisses Balaarys, now, instead, and the world around them melts away, shifting from the endless loop of red mountain, to their true afterlife; a little pocket of Moonshadow.

Will they get jiggy with it in the daedric realm? Absolutely they will.

#tesblr #morrowind #nerevarine oc: balaarys marethi #nerevarine x dagoth ur #nerevarine oc #nerevoryn #nerevarine #just a wee bit of damage control

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thescrolls-haveforetold · 11 months ago

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Hi Arwen :D I hope you're still doing the oc ask. If not feel free to ignore :)

GET TO KNOW THE OC ASKS: 2 for Arenwe the Fair, 5 for Val, 15 for Kynwyn, and 16 for Juno. And the relationship ask: 4 and 24 for Neht and his old friends (either Voryn, Ayem, Seht, or Vehk.)

Don't need to answer all of them of course ^_^

ofc im still doing it !!! i will answer oc asks when i can, i LOOOOVE questions abt my ocs 🩷🩷🩷

2. Is your OC a loner or a social butterfly? Are they satisfied with how they come across to other people?

A. Arenwe is particularly shy in social situations, he’d much prefer that he fade into the background- but it’s particularly hard to do, as a banished psijic who’s ALSO close with nobility and royalty… not to mention he’s also somewhat socially unaware, living on the island for about 200 years. He likely doesn’t THINK about how he comes across to others…

5. Does your OC have a signature weapon and/or attack? How long did they train to master it?

A. surprisingly enough, Valiel is an incredibly powerful magic user. I say magic user, because he never got the chance to become a proper mage. His primary weapon is his immensely powerful fire magic, which relies entirely on his emotional state. During Kvatch, he was so incredibly stressed out by the situation, in one fell swoop his panic cause a wide spread explosion that wiped out the Daedra within the small spot of Oblivion. Of course he pairs this with a blades katana he’s…okay at using, since he’s the only one who knows how to dismantle Oblivion gates, the Blades INSISTED he be trained properly for combat.

15. What places hold significant meaning or memories for your OC? Do they have a positive or negative association with those places?

A. Most of Whiterun holds memories for Kynwyn, most of all because she’s never really been anywhere else- she’s a teenager who hasn’t much experienced the world, of course. Though… the time she ran from home, managed to get passed Riverwood, and stumble upon the destruction of Helgen and the great black beast soaring overhead, meeting her gaze for a second. That place held… a mix of feelings.

16. How does your OC make money? Do they have a respectible profession or work a series of odd jobs? Are they a criminal? Or do they get creative in the pursuit of coin?

A. Juno is primarily a mercenary after Coldharbour, mostly doing menial work, plundering dungeons, helping towns build and rebuild. She’s lost faith in Dibella, with Molag Bal wanting petty revenge for getting his ass handed to him and the…large list of daedric princes that Juno finds herself pissing off its best to not stay in one place for too long in regards to profession…

AND NOW. THE DESPAIR GANG

4. How would they describe each other if asked? Physically? In personality?

A. i’ll do Nerevar all together because he’s be pretty brief…

Neht: Voryn’s got hair and eyes. He’s nice to look at, not so nice to talk to. Ayem’s like fire in hair and personality, Seht’s…uh…there, doesn’t talk much. Vehk’s clever.

translated as: Voryn’s handsome, Ayem’s strong, Seht doesn’t like me and Vehk gives me decent advice.

while..

the others, primarily Vivec and Voryn would likely describe Nerevar is more of a… flavourful way? Vivec being a poet and Voryn being…Voryn. Ayem would describe Nerevar’s worth as a king, as a general, what he can give to her people. and Sil…Sil doesn’t like Nerevar, so all you could likely expect from him is a scrunched nose and a ‘he’s alright.’

24. How do these two interact with each other in public versus in private?

I KNOW IT WAS ONLY MEANT FOR TWO CHARACTERS, so I’ll pick… Nerevar and Ayem.

Of course Nerevar and Almalexia are king and queen, it’s only right that outwardly they show a united front, stronger together. Behind closed doors they’re! alright, I think they’re pretty decent friends- they weren’t particularly close as husband and wife, not after a while. Generally they agree on many things and get along best they can, for sake of the realm most of all- that’s their duty and Almalexia and Nerevar want to fulfill their duty to their people as best as they possibly can.

#LONG POST very long post #THANK U FOR ASKING TGIS WAS LOTS OF FUN 🩷🩷🩷#tes #tes oc

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the-elder-polls · 9 months ago

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so. i was enabled. tags courtesy of @trickstarbrave (hope you don't mind being tagged, if you do i'll remove it) who is what started my nerevar/lorkhan fascination because i him saw mention this once, causing me to lore deep dive and come out the other side, once again, like this.

once again, disclaimer that i am scatter brained and bad with getting my thoughts into words etc etc please be nice to me or i will cry

so. about the parallels between nerevar and lorkhan

to even try to start, lorkhan was killed/mutilated/brutalized/etc and his heart was separated from the rest of him. there are conflicting sources with saying this was a punishment, while others say he consented to it. regardless of his willingness, his divinity was subsequently exiled/fell/whatever to the nirn. there's a VERY obvious parallel here of nerevar being betrayed and killed/mutilated by whoever it was that killed him and the subsequent nerevarine prophecy.

nerevar, son of boethiah. this is a title given to nerevar, supposedly by lorkhan himself, in the five kings of wulfharth. that's not particularly much on its own. nerevar being a demiprince would hilariously not be that big of a deal considering everything else about him. the reason i'm mentioning this is the 10th sermon of vivec, which notes boethiah as saying about/to lorkhan, "We pledge ourselves to you, the Frame-maker, the Scarab: a world for us to love you in, a cloak of dirt to cherish. Betrayed by your ancestors when you were not even looking. […]" the gods of tes are known for being weird (to put it lightly). i personally think boethiah was in fact the mother-father of nerevar; that nerevar was created for the purpose of being the shezarrine; and that lorkhan, in his weird state, was still fully aware of this. also, again, the parallels of betrayal and mutilation are obvious when you compare whatever happened to nerevar to whatever happened to lorkhan.

nords revere lorkhan as shor, believing he sacrificed his life to help create the world as it is. nerevar and the nerevarine prophecy have some parallels here, i think. nerevar's life was sacrificed "for the greater good" (the eventual downfall of the tribunal as gods, the destruction of dagoth ur) to help "create" the world as it is.

at least one myth (the favored daughter of fadomai) describes azura as finding "[…] broken and bleeding, and there was a hole in his chest." and that she then tore his heart out due to it being corrupted by rot (hi, namira). foul murder is NOT canon, but i think it's worth taking it into consideration here, given that nerevar is depicted in foul murder as impaled through the heart. (i can't really get my thoughts together with what i want to say about this, but i want you to note azura and lorkhan being so strongly associated in this myth. given the EVERYTHING ELSE, it makes sense.)

following on the previous point, the claim that azura appeared and cursed the tribunal for their usage of the heart and their betrayal of nerevar is a good parallel for her finding the wounded lorkhan.

one nordic source (five kings of king wulfharth) states that lorkhan reappeared somehow at the battle of red mountain, reunited with his heart, and that he wounded nerevar before nerevar defeated/killed/etc him. given the absolute absurdity of tes lore, i don't think it's far fetched to say that this could be true in a roundabout way: nerevar WAS lorkhan, or more accurately, the shezarrine. whatever happened at red mountain was a Whole Thing that we don't have concrete answers to. i personally think the proximity to the heart gave nerevar a fucking power up of some sort/allowed him to channel lorkhan much more intensely, which helped him in the next point:

the same source claims that lorkhan said the dwemer would die by his hand which, again, while i'm stretching (all of tes lore is stretching lbr but anyway), i gotta point out that nerevar and the disappearance of the dwemer are intrinsically linked. there's no denying that. if nerevar was the shezarrine, then this could be true - when dumac was struck down by nerevar and kagrenac truck the heart, the dwemer vanished. it's a bit roundabout, but it's not incorrect. ["Nevertheless, it is true that they will die by my hand, and any whoever should side with them."]

also the tribunal's jealousy of nerevar + his outright refusal to use the heart makes a lot of sense if he already had some of that godly power and they didn't. if they saw him at his full potential due to the heart and wanted it for themselves.

anyway. who said that

#salem chatter #salem rambles about lore #long post (￣┰￣) my bad

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wellthebardsdead · 2 years ago

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The loved & The forgotten pt3

Part 2 here

———

Nerevar: *rubbing his face as he paces back and forth remembering the vision Azura had shown them of her shrine, and the dunmer of silver and ebony skin* I should have investigated the ashlanders warnings when they said they’d found an infant born of night and day.

Voryn: and what would you have done? Killed him before he could grow into a problem yet again?

Nerevar: what? No! I could have raised him and guided him on the correct path.

Voryn: and invoke the ire of Azura? You and I both know you don’t have the heart to betray her neht… *sighs* but even then, your heart always has been too kind… what if he grew up to betray you again? In his last life you pulled him from the streets, you clothed him, fed him, taught him to read, to fight, to sing… and look at what he did to you… and even now he is a threat to us and the good daedra…

Nerevar: *walks to him and gently takes his hands* There’s still a chance we can stop this before it turns to violence… maybe he’s different in this life I mean… in truth he really only turned violent because Azura attacked him first…

Voryn: *sighs* oh moon and star, *gently strokes his cheek* my Hortator your heart will be the death of you… but if you insist… *stands up* I’ll prepare my things… I won’t let you face him alone this time… because last time, well, you lost your face.

Nerevar: *snickers* don’t even joke about that. I was still alive when they cut it off.

Voryn: well I’m glad you got it back, it looks much prettier on your head~

*meanwhile*

Vivienne: *seated in the collage of winterhold as the archmage examines him and the marking on his hand* so… there’s nothing you can do?…

Savos Aren: No methods available to me have worked… it seems this spans beyond just a simple curse or a marking of ownership some daedra enjoy placing on their victims… no this, is deeper than that… If I didn’t know any better I’d say you had a marital bond to the prince of rape but given everything you’ve told me it seems unlikely though- *looks at the unusual dunmer, his one red eye and one blue eye, his silver and ebony skin* You… do look an awful lot like Vivec.

Vivienne: I’m not vivec! Everyone keeps mistaking me for him but I’m not him!

Lucien: I understand you’re you Vivi but… the comparisons are uncanny. Two separate skin tones, two very different eyes, and um- *clears his throat* both the bangers and mash and the toad in the hole, so to speak.

Taliesin: *gently places his hand on Vivienne’s shoulder seeing his growing frustration* Is there anything we can do? Anyone else who might be able to help us?…

Savos Aren: well- there is one person but… He’s as mad as a cliff racer.

Kaidan: ehhh, of course he is, all the powerful magic users are… alright, who is he?…

Savos Aren: his name is Neloth and he’s a- pardon my language, a prick.

Kaidan: *cackles* alright then. So where’s he at?

Savos Aren: solstheim, I believe there’s a ship that travels there from windhelm on occasion. That’d be your best bet.

Taliesin: we could also investigate this miraak cultist business while we’re there too seeing as the library had nothing on him…

Lucien: Ohh! And I can finally investigate dumzbathar-

Everyone: *looks at him*

Lucien: But let’s get our friend separated from the prince of rape and deal with this miraak person first- right. Yes, good plan team.

Inigo: *snickers shaking his head*

#vivienne dragonborn #vivec #dunmer dragonborn #skyrim taliesin #Kaidan skyrim #lucien skyrim #inigo skyrim #indoril nerevar #nerevar #voryn dagoth

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aladaylessecondblog · 1 month ago

Text

Severed Destiny, pt. 20

https://archiveofourown.org/works/49342666/chapters/162182188

You are no more than what you say you are, Haj-deek thought to herself as the door opened, Demand to be acknowledged.

It would not be a lie to say she wanted to be accepted into the family.

But everything seemed to fade from her mind as she walked over the threshold and laid eyes on her father in person for the first time. The flashes of memory, the sights of him in dreams, nothing prepared her for how tall he was, and as Uthol had said...overwhelming. Vivec had said even in the First Era the man had always seemed vaguely unapproachable to all but his family...and Nerevar.

He was looking at her, that much was obvious. But that mask--large, impassive, locked always in the same neutral expression--blocked her ability to guess how he might be looking at her. She could gather no clues, make no assumptions or plans about how to proceed.

What good were Vivec's lessons on deception if she couldn't call on what she'd learned from them? That thought prompted another: if Vivec were in my position, how would HE handle it?

Ulen backed off once she'd gotten close enough, and Haj-deek wished she could shrink from view. She'd expected maybe not to be excited, but to look forward to it somehow. Not whatever THIS feeling was.

"Remove your helmet."

Haj-deek had almost forgotten she was wearing it, that boiled netch leather helmet. With shaking hands she reached up to pull it off, then stooped slightly to set it at her feet. When she looked back up he'd stepped closer.

Dagoth Ur.

Even those not faithful to the Temple feared him. She'd seen the corprus-afflicted at Tel Fyr, the suffering they had to deal with; and then the lucid...ish ones that were the ash ghouls and ascended sleepers.

He watched her in silence for nearly a minute before Haj-deek - feeling entirely too uncomfortable with the silence despite everything else - spoke up.

"You don't need to introduce yourself...everyone knows who you are. But me, I'm...Sunnar. But I guess you could call me 'Nerevar' too, since Azura..."

"You need not lie to me," he said in reply, "That is not the name you have worn all your life, is it?"

"No." she looked away. "I was afraid--it's...Haj-deek."

"Why 'Haj-deek'?"

"It means hidden child. My mother was there with them for a while, and then they did the same for me."

"And so well did they hide you that none ever had an inkling of your existence. Had I known--had any of us known..." He paused. "You should have grown up here."

"Well...I'm here now," she said, and then trying to sound more like a naive kid, "I didn't think Almalexia would...act as she did, or I would have...been here sooner. I'm--good at healing, and she taught me a few things."

How he believed her she didn't know. She didn't dare look directly at him. She raised a hand to cover her mouth and stiffened when he walked closer. She wanted to say that she wasn't sure how growing up here would have turned out, but knew enough to keep her mouth shut. He HAD to believe she was all in on this, that she was just some foolish child who didn't know better.

Think, she told herself, Think. What does he expect of you? Play into it.

"She...figured out who I was, and sent me to speak to Sotha Sil. But...she'd killed him." Haj-deek took a deep breath, and gulped slightly. "Everything I'd done in her name...it didn't matter. I was just devilspawn to her."

"Yes...we had heard as much." There was a pause. "You have learned the lesson Nerevar did - not to trust Ayem."

"I remember," she lied, "A little of when she wasn't...when she was nicer, and...and I thought...I don't know what I thought. I just figured I should give her a chance. But she took that chance to try and put a sword in my back."

"Give the false gods time and they will do that. All of them, eventually."

Haj-deek twisted her hands together.

"Am I safe here? Will they be able to get me, here? And I don't just mean Almalexia. The Dark Brotherhood--"

"You are safe here, as your mother was." There was some strange note in her father's voice she couldn't identify. "They cannot reach you."

There was a pause - one that grew longer and longer. She'd thought he'd have more questions...and maybe he did, but maybe he was like her and couldn't figure out how to ask them without sounding awkward.

He couldn't be unsure of him, not really. Gods weren't like that...were they?

Clearly he had never figured out why her mother left, so as long as she played her cards right...

Finally, she figured out something.

"Everyone that knows says I look like you," she said, "But...do I look like my mother at all?"

Another pause. A slight sharp breath.

"Something in your bearing," he said, "And the way you walk...but in the face, I can find very little of her. Perhaps the shape of your eyes. Otherwise..."

"As if someone just copied you." She took a deep, unsteady breath.

(That thing Vivec had given her...it wasn't time. When she tried to reach for it she simply had that feeling. Not now.)

"What," her father said, after another long pause, "Have you brought with you?"

"A lot of rations," she said, "I traded with the Erabenimsun. I...don't know how I feel about...you know, the corprusmeat."

She reached for her bag and knelt to empty it.

The patched guar with the missing button eyes. The clay board. The copy of the Sleepy Little Nix-hound.

He took the clay board in both hands and looked over at her. "What is this?"

"My footprints when I was a baby. Im--the argonians said it was a reminder for me of how small I was once, in comparison to how big I am now." She gave a small smile, remembering several times when she was smaller how she had compared her feet to the print on the board. How much bigger they were, even then.

(She kept the vial of Hist Sap and bottle of skooma hidden.)

A few random potions of magicka that she'd put together. Then the dagger, and the robe.

Dagoth Ur stepped closer at that, the clay board still in his hands.

The random strip of fabric, too, that had been wrapped around the dagger and robe.

"She kept them, then?"

"Kept what?"

"The robe I gave her, and that--that other fabric, that's mine."

He held out his hands a bit - and Haj-deek noticed on one of his wrists there was wrapped some fabric similar to the strip of the one in her bag. The other was bare.

"I gave it to her, thinking to get it back when she returned. I thought she might like the reminder that I was near."

She reached up to hand it back to him, and he took it.

Haj-deek had the thought with that brief contact that she was almost certain her mother must have - in the strictest manner of speaking he was undead, and yet he was warm as if he were alive.

"The rest of it is just my clothes and the rations," She said, "Some of the clothes...smell like skooma."

"Then why keep it?"

"If you pass someone on the street who smells like skooma, you're going to ignore them, aren't you?"

"Very clever."

Then she saw at the bottom of the bag, beneath the clothes, something she'd forgotten.

Her mother's journal.

He'd want it, she knew he would, but it was too dangerous to give it to him. Suppose he read it and figured out that her mother had meant to leave him? Perhaps he wouldn't be angry at HER, but...

"There is something we must discuss. ...multiple somethings, of course, but this shall be first."

"What's that?" Haj-deek spoke when she'd repacked everything, and had the journal tucked and wrapped up nicely enough. "I'm not asking for a place to be made for me yet."

"You will have that regardless," he replied, "Did you expect to be turned away?"

"Other dunmer have," she said quietly, trying to sound sad, "I didn't want to presume, considering I wasn't exactly born in the house."

"You have no need to fear that here."

He seemed to go silent then, focused once again on that clay board she'd given him. After a little while longer she asked, "Where will I be sleeping?"

He set off then, and all she could do was follow. It felt like a fever dream, walking after him - she was sure if she was anyone else there'd be death and doom waiting...but there wasn't. There was just a hallway that seemed slightly heated.

(A short distance away, Ulen seemed to follow them.)

"What's at the end?" she asked, when he stopped at a door.

"Hot springs," he replied, "A benefit of the volcano, you understand."

She nodded. And after looking into the room (a bedframe with some furs, a wardrobe with some candles in it, and a table with a chair. Somehow more than she expected, considering how bare everything else felt).

Then, a strange moment.

"I've been here before," she said, "Haven't I?"

"This is where your mother stayed, yes. I've had time to have them improve it for you."

"No windows...so no one can get in..." She shoved her bag into the wardrobe and folded up the robe over it.

"Ulen will be guarding your door until morning."

"What time am I expected to wake up?" she asked. "And--and what is expected of me?"

"We can discuss that in the morning," Dagoth Ur replied. "At the moment it is just before ten."

Haj-deek took a deep breath. "Then six sounds good. I don't usually sleep in because of the harbor bells...it was a good alarm."

She smiled at the thought--she really missed the sounds of the harbor. There was nothing like that here, nothing but the rumble and the odd beating she assumed must be the Heart of Lorkhan.

That was another thought.

"Can I see the Heart tomorrow?"

"Of course." There was a sound like a chuckle. "I was expecting you to ask after that sooner."

He turned to leave, and Haj-deek let out the breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. Her father seemed pleased with the endeavor, but she felt she'd been running an obstacle course or something like that. It had gone well.

She lit a candle, and once she was sure he wasn't coming back, pulled out some paper and tore a small section off to write a letter to Vivec. The little flame would be enough to burn this scrap, and ash in a volcano was no surprise.

Things would be better, surely. She just had to work a little for it.

#dagoth ur is really going through it man #fanfiction #morrowind #dagoth ur #nerevarine #morrowind fanfic #morrowind fanfiction

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