#AskMareena

[mareenavee]

Do you think there’d be obese people in the Fourth Era? Where?

Hi! Thanks for the ask. We don't see this much in game. In general, body type diversity is rather rare or sparse in this medium, as much as we'd like to see different takes.

I also want to preface this by saying this has no reflection on how things are in real life, or what I believe about modern living or people in general. Everyone has value and deserves to be heard no matter outward appearances.

Being a larger individual myself irl, I tend to avoid descriptors like 'obese' in my writing. Just tired of hearing the turn of phrase honestly. There's other ways to convey the image, other words to choose, and also no harm in letting readers decide how to envision a specific character.

This is a simple and not very well researched answer, I understand, but just a bit of what I thought of off the top of my head regarding the question.

I think Fourth Era Tamriel is in a bit of a state of decay, to be honest. There've been wars and disasters for a couple centuries by the events of Skyrim. The Empire's influence is stretched a bit too thin, and they've lost provinces to The Aldmeri Dominion and to general unrest, among other things. In Skyrim, we see the state of things. Decay seems to be a running theme for the story, from my eyes, and the Dragonborn is supposed to maybe bring a bit of hope back to the narrative, but it's unclear really if they are successful on that front or not. I kind of lean into this in my fic. Things are difficult everywhere. It's possible to earn money, but most of the higher paying work is dangerous and physically taxing.

I think because of the Civil War specifically, food supplies are not as plentiful as they might have been otherwise. I think it's difficult for the working class individuals to afford as much security as they'd normally have been able to, as I'd assume prices are kind of high, if the danger of getting goods from point a to point b is almost insurmountable. People have to work more to afford the same amount of supplies and security. There's more things on the roads that need to be fought. I don't think there's "plenty" of food for everyone, especially if things sort of still function very capitalistically in most holds. We see beggars in game in most cities.

Not by virtue of beauty standards or trying, I think many if not most people would have to move/work too much on too little food to have a larger body structure. I think, just like in many real world societies in the past, the more money and power and resources a person has, the more rest they can afford and the more likely they'd be to have extra weight on their frames.

There's a lot of factors to this but the short answer probably is yes, I'm sure there are. And where? Probably more likely in the keeps, castles, manors and estates of the very rich across most provinces who can afford to rest and worry very little about food supplies.

I'd be grateful if someone with irl history background could hop in on this question and equate a few things to Tamriel for me. (:

[mareenavee]

To Hold on To You

From this prompt list [x]

Song Ref / Title Inspo: Hold On by Brooke Annibale

Rating: T Tags: No Archive Warnings Apply, Athis/Teldryn Sero, Athis (Elder Scrolls)/Original Female Character(s), Pining, Jealousy, Nerevarine Teldryn Sero It simply wasn’t fair, but things like this rarely were. 

Teldryn leaned his head against the Gildergreen as he sat there on the bench trying not to look at him wandering around the market below. With his wife on his arm, no less. It made sense, obviously, but…

He pinched the bridge of his nose. Now was not the time to wallow in what couldn’t be. Because it couldn’t. Athis was the Dragonborn, for Azura’s sake. He had a family – a wife and a toddler and a house… He had a life here. A life Teldryn didn’t belong in. And it wasn’t fair at all. It wasn’t, yet that was just the way it had to be. -> read the rest on AO3

Teldryn/Athis 46 out of envy or jealousy

As it turns out, I managed to outsource this prompt fill, courtesy of @mareenavee

Go read and enjoy a bit of heartbreak!

[mareenavee]

I don't know if this is an ask, or just incoherent burbling, but Skywind! Morrowind, but with the quality it deserves? Skyrim, but with so much more to it?

I've heard about Skywind, mostly the soundtrack dropkicking my soul out of my body. I have no idea how progress is progressing, but I am so ready. I don't think I have any applicable skills to help, but I am happy to cheerlead?

BURBLE AWAY! The project is so awesome. I'm working on a quest with a great batch of writers right now and I also write item descriptions! I've been immensely enjoying the process, and have made a couple friends through it as well! Another writer for the team that I've just met is @tastesoftamriel / @thattalviel! Huge shoutout to her and her amazing work :D

The mod is progressing steadily, but as with any mod project based solely on volunteer hours, there's still a lot to do! You can check the website here: https://tesrskywind.com/ and see if there are any skills of yours that match with what still needs doing. Doesn't hurt to apply :3

Thank you for sending this ask along!

[mareenavee]

⭐️ mages and literacy

Director's Cut -- Mages and Literacy in The World on our Shoulders

FRICKEN FANTASTIC. Thank you so much for asking about this specifically.

Actually, on a side note, my mom and I were talking about how strangely well read the people of Tamriel are considering the setting. I really love it even though it's relatively odd. We only ever meet a few authors in game, and never anyone who transcribes professionally. Certainly no printing presses. Maybe there are and we just don't know it.

On a more serious note, since literacy seems very common in the setting, generally speaking -- obviously like everywhere there will be exceptions to the rules, I'd like to talk just a bit about arcane text specifically. I'd mentioned before that becoming a mage, or at least becoming more skilled at the use of magic requires time, effort and study. Some people are naturally more inclined to do so, and some are not. There could be a myriad reasons, culturally or biologically or what have you.

I have a scene in chapter 2 where Hadvar gives a spell tome to Nyenna that he'd taken out of the keep in Helgen. The scene starts after she quickly understands and memorizes the words for the flames spell:

“How curious… I had no idea this could be so simple,” she said. “My mother never saw sense in trying to teach me. My purpose was to unite houses, and that’s it. At least according to her. It was a miracle I learned even the tiniest alchemic recipes in all the time I’d had to observe her work.” Hadvar looked at her, again with his eyebrows knit, making his broad face seem even wider than it was. She returned the confused stare. “Wait, is it not simple?”

“Magic definitely isn’t simple, no, I can assure you. I can’t make any sense of those scribblings no matter how many hours I stare at them. I know they’re written in Common but they start to swim around on the page like they’re not meant for eyes like mine,” Hadvar said, reading over her shoulder.

We're not exactly sure what language magic is written in, or if it exists in all languages, or is something else entirely. We're not sure if it's a manifestation of the blessings of Magnus or Julianos on Nirn, even. In my hc, sometimes the text is very difficult to read. Some people can't read it at all, though it's possible they could learn the spells if the words were ever spoken to them. Some people, especially considering the social attitude toward magic in Skyrim in this case, accept that arcane texts are more trouble than they're worth -- as Hadvar might in this scene. Or maybe there's more to it that we can't know.

I like to think the arcane texts are themselves magic of a sort, that spells and the intentions behind them are found in the shape of this language -- even if it's actually written in Tamrielic/Common. It's possible, for some, it's simply not something they're willing to put the effort in to comprehend.

Even if many people in Skyrim/Tamriel own and read many more books than would normally seem possible in such settings, arcane texts are probably on a different level. I would imagine that's probably why there's not very many spell tomes sitting around on peoples' bookshelves in their houses or anything like that. Usually one must go to where the mages are to borrow their copies.

There's probably a lot more we can extrapolate on this question, but there's surprisingly little lore about the mechanics of why spell tomes work. (Or really, why they get destroyed in game when you're done with them.) In the end, I think there's a lot of factors that influence why someone might become a mage, and perhaps a lot more as to why someone else might not, and some of that reason could be the difficulty of the craft and the amount of study and work that probably has to go into it under most circumstances. Less literacy, and more cultural and aptitude based.

(I like to think it's like any art in real life. Some people have natural affinities to do creative work, some don't. Anyone who wants to improve their skill in said art will need to put in the work, no matter how easily or not it comes to each specific artist.)

Thanks! This was fun to mull over :D

[mareenavee]

Is there anything specific about your writing which you can pinpoint that you have improved upon since starting writing? Where have you seen the most "gains"? Is there anything in particular that you'd like to tweak? (I have been thinking about this a lot for myself personally, and I thought it would be an interesting question for you.)

Hello WINTER 🫂!! Ah this is such a fantastic question! Thank you for asking it. Let's talk about level ups below the cut!!! It'll be a long post with rambling, advice and snippets.

Without further ado...

What really is a Level Up and how do I notice one?

I have been seeing a lot of you guys really level up lately with your writing. The joy and effort is super, super apparent in our circle and I am seriously proud of you guys. I'm floored reading the work all ya'll are sharing for WIP (whenever.) It's interesting to me that I can so easily see the skill gains for others but it's much tougher for me to look at mine and SEE it. There's a bit of a perception about our own craft that it's not as "good as it should be" but it's really part of a cycle. (This post here can explain it with graphics.)

At a certain point we hit an overlap where we see/evaluate craft in ways we're still working on putting into practice which can skew our perspective of our own work until we catch up with ourselves. It's important to understand this, at least for me, because it's like...partially turning a page in a book. We're still processing what's been said, but we don't know the rest of the story yet :> And the only way to get the rest of it is to keep going, and finish turning the page.

As with art -- I love looking back on old work and noticing just how much things have changed and for the better, too. Part of learning how to level up is also learning to be gentle with ourselves, which is my next point.

Something that has helped me immensely and has been so invaluable in my journey is mindfulness and mindset shifts. Instead of using negative self-talk on myself, on my writing, on my craft -- I try to reframe it into statements like "I can change how I convey x, y or z if I try this." It is not an easy thing, and is a constant journey. But it does help the level ups. I speak from painstaking experience.

For specifics about my writing -- I'll begin from when I started writing World because I have been writing for ages at this point (I started when I was 7 years old after I first read The Hobbit lol).

Gains

I have seen immense improvement with my scenery descriptions and describing how characters feel about a space and events going on in them since the beginning of World. I have aphantasia so it's really almost impossible for me to visualize anything in my head regarding scenery especially. I tend to rely on sound for this, but imagery is important. Also when I began World, I was in full challenge mode and didn't have the time or confidence to look up the references I needed. I can compare draft versions here for example.

Old Chapter 9 - First version

She took his hand and led him down past the now-recovered Gildergreen, whose ethereal flowers still bloomed in the cold of Sun’s Dusk. They walked almost to the entrance of the city, right before Adrianne’s forge. Nyenna guided him up the stairs of a little house which had stood empty for as long as anyone could remember. Recently, the old, faded boards that had scarred its surface had been replaced. She pulled a fine chain from around her neck and revealed a brass key hanging on it. She unclasped her necklace and unlocked the door of the house.  Athis looked around in awe at the tiny, perfect cottage. There was not a speck of dust, and the fire had already been lit. New dishes lined shelves that had been made by hand. Candles scattered around the room glowed like miniature stars. The light shone off of their matching rings as they walked toward the back of their kitchen. “Welcome to Breezehome,” Nyenna said. “I’ve been working on this for weeks.” “You did all this yourself? For me?” Athis asked, still stunned. He ran his hands over the rough hewn table in the back of the room almost as if he couldn’t believe it was real. “For us,” Nyenna corrected. He turned and lifted her up in one motion, spinning her around in pure joy before setting her back down. They sat down together at the table, and he kissed her gently. “Our home,” Athis said, voice thick with emotion. “Our home,” Nyenna agreed. He pulled her into a tight embrace. They sat like that for some time, warm in each other’s arms.

New Version (Now Chapter 7)

She took his hand and led him down past the now-recovered Gildergreen, whose ethereal flowers still bloomed, even in the cold of Sun’s Dusk. They walked almost to the entrance of the city, right before Adrianne’s forge. Nyenna guided him up the stairs of a little house which had stood empty for as long as anyone could remember. Recently, the old, faded boards that had scarred its surface had been replaced. She pulled a fine chain from around her neck and revealed an old brass key hanging on it. She unclasped her necklace and unlocked the door of the house. She led Athis into the tiny, perfect cottage. There was not a speck of dust, and the fire had already been lit. New dishes lined shelves that had been made by hand. The kitchen area next to the hearth in the center of the main room was outfitted with second hand, well-loved pans Hulda had given her. Tundra cotton and lavender hung from the ceiling, drying alongside other bundles of herbs and braids of garlic. Candles scattered around the room glowed like miniature stars. The light reflected off of their matching rings as they walked toward the back of their kitchen. She fell even more in love, if it was possible, as she watched him look around in awe at all her hard work. All she had achieved for them. “Welcome to Breezehome,” Nyenna said quietly. “I’ve been working on this for weeks, between everything else.” “You did all this yourself? For me?” Athis asked, still stunned. He ran his hands over the rough hewn table in the back of the room almost as if he couldn’t believe it was real. Farkas had actually found that for her. She had repaired it herself. “For us ,” Nyenna corrected. He turned and lifted her up in one motion, spinning her around in pure joy before setting her back down. They sat down together at the table, and he kissed her gently. She giggled. “Our friends helped, too.” “This is really our home?” Athis asked, voice thick. He smiled, garnet eyes shining with held-back tears. “Our home,” Nyenna agreed. He pulled her into a tight embrace. They sat like that for some time, warm in each other’s arms. She pulled another fine chain out from beneath her dress. A brand new brass key she had Adrianne make for her hung from it. She handed it to Athis. He held onto it like it was the greatest treasure he’d ever seen before he slipped the chain over his head, links catching in his hair and tugging more strands loose from the braids. She knew he’d never thought he’d be able to have a place to call his own. It was why she had been working so much, and sleeping so little. To give him this, that they could share together. It was the least she could do. She wanted a home, too. It had been so long since she had felt this kind of safety, this kind of comfort. Normalcy, of any kind. He had given her that. Freely and with his whole heart. They had already started to build a beautiful life. It was more than what she had asked for. It was everything she could have imagined and more.

Changes

I think if I were to pick one thing I'd still like to push more it'd be the visual descriptions of things for sure as mentioned above. I do rely a lot on sound to convey a lot of what I'm experiencing in my mind while I'm writing. Sound has never been an issue for me to remember or to imagine. But balancing that with actual descriptions of what the character can see is still super important and I do try very hard to do this :D

Final Thoughts

Leveling up and improving at writing takes a lot of practice generally speaking, and the drive to want to do the thing. Life can get in the way of creativity sometimes, I speak from experience. So the biggest advice I can give is to normalize being proud of your journey. Each step, past, present and where you're trying to go in the future. Your words matter more than you realize, more than the numbers will have you believe, more than your own self-talk will try and convince you otherwise.

Level ups occur because you are doing something you love, acquiring good input (ie reading widely, and writing often and noticing what works about these stories and what doesn't and asking WHY) , and making a concerted effort to try your best. And your best can look like different things at different points. The next step after that is like I said above, be gentle with yourself, especially each of your past selves. Their work got you where you are today. And where you are today will become a past self that provided a foundation on which you level up your craft.

So be kind to yourself. Keep practicing. Be mindful. When you are inspired, don't forget to write it down. Save pieces of your work for later. Review your own writing with pride.

I know it's not the easiest to see in ourselves and our work, but all that we do, all that creativity -- it's absolutely worth it. The level ups will happen. It takes time. But you'll get there.

(And Winter specifically? GIRL. You are leveling up. You got this. I see you. (: )

[mareenavee]

All the Lines Tag Game!

AUGh I LOVE THIS SO MUCH. Okay thank you to @throughtrialbyfire and @miraakulous-cloud-district for the tags! I am thus tagging @paraparadigm, @changelingsandothernonsense, @thana-topsy, @thequeenofthewinter, @gilgamish, @rhiannon1199, @elfinismsarts, @kookaburra1701, @dirty-bosmer, @nuwanders, @ladytanithia, @polypolymorph, @saltymaplesyrup and @archangelsunited!! And, you if I didn't tag you. Tag me back! I want to see!

Here are the questions for the tag game right here! Fill them out!

Without further ado, read on for some lines for The World on Our Shoulders!

A line from your fic that makes you laugh

Chapter 25: A Perfect Storm

“Then why did you not poison the Dragonborn?” Teldryn ventured. He’d already taken the coin purse from the bench next to the Thalmor without being noticed. He grinned as the man’s face twisted through several different emotions until he buried his face in his hands. “Oh, please. At this point, you must know I never did claim to be a good double agent,” the Thalmor lamented. Teldryn let out a loud cackle.

I have a few zingers lol but Varlais, Varlais. He's the comic relief here.

A line from your fic that makes you sad

Chapter 8: Haunted By the Ghost of You

“I can’t do this by myself, love. I really need you here,” he whispered to the ghost of the girl he remembered, singing in the kitchen with autumn eyes full of love and hope. She didn’t answer. Couldn’t. Wouldn’t. She was gone, and Athis knew no matter when Nyenna next came home, that girl in his memories would never, ever return.

Bean </3 Poor, poor Athis 😭 Why did I do this to him? augh.

A line from your fic you're proud of

Chapter 26: Voice Within

More and more of its lair started to fall away back into the void, or else Oblivion; patches of reality pulled forward, stark against the ruined illusion. Varlais, face set in a severe scowl, took its moment of weakness as a signal and pulled an ebony dagger from somewhere in his coat. He rushed at the Atronach, stabbing into it with all the force he could muster. As with ice, silence shattered.

I just really loved this entire scene actually. It causes so much trouble for CHAPTERS after this. And it's excellent.

A line for your fic you think could have been better

Chapter 3: A World of Fragile Things

“Of course you do,” the second vampire said. Her voice seemed calm, distant. This one was a Nord at one point, tall and imposing. She was casting a spell of some kind, but it hurt. Nyenna looked down at her hands and was shocked to see the color being drained from her, her hands almost skeletal. She screamed then, terror getting the better of her and clouding her mind.

I kind of wished I pushed the description of this magic a little bit further. I do love editing and I'm still in awe of past Katie for how far she's gotten so far. So I'm still fine with this line but it was an opportunity I didn't take.

A line from your fic that makes you want to punch a character.

Chapter 19: Although I am Already a Danger

“You seemed to be having a hard time. Nothing a sweetroll can’t fix, I figured. Want to talk about it?” he offered. Nyenna gave him an apprehensive look. She didn’t really want to talk to him particularly about all her nonsense, but if she didn’t, it would be harder to focus moving forward with all that had to be done in the next few days. “No. But I’ll tell you anyway,” she said. He scoffed. She ate the piece of sweetroll she held before continuing. “I…was not the best wife. I ran away in the middle of the night. It was unkind. I knew it was when I did it, but just like he followed me into battle with a dragon, I knew if I didn’t simply go, he’d turn his back in another horrible situation all because of me. And after everything I’ve been through, I just…I guess I couldn’t handle watching him get injured again. Or worse, as it sometimes goes with dragons.”

There are a few instances where Nyenna makes really stupid mistakes. Extremely stupid mistakes. And this, innocuous though it seems, is one of them. One of the huge ones. I think only @paraparadigm caught it. I was yelling when I wrote this. Like "REALLY NYENNA?!" On the other side of the coin, she's used to people behaving like Teldryn had before this; it was expected. When that dust settled, and he was elsewise, well. She just blabbed.

A line from your fic that makes you go 'aww'

Chapter 6: Together, We Are Enough (slightly longer snippet, I can't help it lol)

She made him feel less alone, after so long and so much struggle. They could build something beautiful together. He hoped. Better to ask and be sure. He was still grinning, and no longer cared a whit who saw, or who had comments or jokes to make on the matter. He was happy. Actually happy. And he loved her with all his heart. It may not have been a long time, but it felt right. And so he’d worn the pendant. And he had hoped. And here she was, an Amulet of Mara in her hands. “Well?” he asked, after a moment. “You want to marry…me?” she asked with a giggle. “Won’t lie. I do,” Athis answered. He felt his face get hot. Other people were shushing each other up near Jorrvaskr. A few people had even wandered further down the stairs to better spy on them. “What about you?” She gasped and all but danced in place. She held onto the amulet with both hands, staring at it just for a moment. She let it fall to her chest. She looked him right in the eye and beamed. “Of course, of course!” she squealed. She threw her arms around his neck again and he embraced her back. “Then it’s settled. It’s you and me, love,” Athis whispered, squeezing her tightly before lifting her up and spinning around. There was a huge roar of applause behind them, as the Companions and a few townsfolk there for Anoriath’s event celebrated with them. Athis laughed deeply, embracing his soon-to-be wife. They walked back up to Jorrvaskr, hand in hand, into the crowd of merry friends and feast-goers.

A line from your fic that's full of symbolism

Chapter 27: Echoes

He reached for her then, running as fast as he could toward her. He seemed to run forever, never getting any closer. As if his hands were blocked somehow. She never came into focus. Instead, the figure — who wasn’t at all Nyenna — turned, silvery hair curling back on itself like a stole. The figure threw its head back in a wicked laugh that broke through the buzz. The hair morphed into the form of a silver snake, twisting over the figure’s shoulders and arms, which they held out to either side. The snake’s scales slowly shifted golden in hue. Teldryn couldn’t see the figure’s face. He never got close enough. A sword in their other hand glinted in the light from the moonless sky, driven into the ground at their feet. Still, the image wasn’t quite clear. Still, he could not reach.

I almost linked the entire fanfic.

A line from your fic that contains an Easter egg

“Ground rules,” she said, trying to seem aggravated. “Keep those thoughts to yourself, especially in public.” “As you wish, sera,” Teldryn said, still beaming. She rolled her eyes. Geldis gave him a harsh look as he dropped off two bowls of porridge and two mugs of canis root tea, but said nothing.

I always yell about all the Tolkien references so, instead, have this Princess Bride easter egg instead :>

A line from your fic that's shocking

Chapter 1: Prologue

“I don’t regret us, for the record. My fear has nothing to do anymore with where we are and how much stronger we’ve become. We’re supposed to be together. She’s supposed to exist,” Nyenna said with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. She drummed her fingers over his hands which still lay on her stomach. “She? More like he," Teldryn scoffed in a teasing tone. He paused, waiting for her retort, and chuckled instead in the silence. “You keep saying that,” Nyenna said and shook her head. She laughed too, especially as the little one kicked at their touch, restless and relentless. Teldryn kissed the side of her jaw near her ear and she sighed. “I’d have never made it through any of this without you, you know.” “You would have. I see you. You’re stronger than you know,” he replied. He always said the right things at the right time. She wondered briefly how he always seemed to know exactly what she needed to hear.

I could've linked the entire prologue lol. I laid everything out on the table right at the beginning. Perhaps this isn't shocking anymore for most of you LOL but I mean...sorta yeah. There's more that probably would be. But it's not published yet. :>

A line from your fic you want to talk about more

Chapter 27: Echoes (longer snippet again lol)

“Tell me what to do,” he said after a moment. “Oh, I really hate this, though,” Neloth said, apprehension sounding odd and incongruous for him. “There’s a reason people don’t practice this way. It might seem like nothing to you now that you’ve already accomplished the connection. That it brought forth memories of immature jokes should have told me enough… But… I’ve seen people disintegrate, their Magicka pools just… gone. In an instant. I’ve… Well, I’ve done it to someone before, myself.” Teldryn stopped short. “Jokes aside, Neloth, but…you? With someone else?” When Neloth fell silent and pensive instead of digging back at him, Teldryn knew something was wrong. His stomach lurched again as the old wizard opened his mouth to speak, then closed it again and ground his teeth against whatever he was holding back. He cleared his throat before he was able to make his point. “Yes, I… It was during the Oblivion Crisis. We closed a gate that opened at Sadrith Mora. We were… We were without resources, but…” He trailed off, grief and anger crossing his brow like a squall. His eyes went dark. “I thought I didn’t care about her at the time. My apprentice.” He smoothed his robes and sighed heavily. “We were the last two mages left alive and the Redoran hadn’t gotten anywhere near the settlement yet. Neither of us were enough on our own. The option was this… indecent spellwork or both of us dying trying to break the siege of Dremora ourselves.” He fidgeted with his sleeve and looked anywhere else except at Teldryn. “It had been our last resort. I reached and she answered and then in a moment, she was gone. Ashes. Like she’d never even existed. But I still remember her. And I remember the sound of it…of her Magicka evaporating… like it was yesterday.” He cleared his throat and glanced up at the ceiling. “She wasn’t weak by any means. This happened anyway. And I… I still feel like I’ve lost something of myself all these years later. Something I’ll never get back.”

NELOTH BACKSTORY. I could and probably will write more fic set before the events of World and include more of this. More of what this person meant to Neloth, and more of what this event really caused for him personally, for House Telvanni, for his standing in the Council, for the outcome of the Oblivion Crisis. Everything. Oh it'll be so much fun.

[mareenavee]

Fic Authors Self Rec!

Tagged by the indominable @kookaburra1701! Rules:

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let’s spread the self-love!

I love this. OKAY LET'S GO. Tell me about how proud you are of your work, friends. You've come so far <3

Tagging: @paraparadigm, @polypolymorph, @changelingsandothernonsense, @thana-topsy, @dirty-bosmer, @thequeenofthewinter, @gilgamish, @archangelsunited, @throughtrialbyfire, @expended-sleeper, @ladytanithia and YOU yes if you see this, talk kindly about your writing journey and TAG ME BACK <3

Below the cut because I do be ramblin' (: They're not really in any particular order, I just love them all for different reasons.

1) If We Knew Anything At All

This one was a hell ship prompted by a list that Topsy shared with a bunch of us and I had a brainwyrm, then ended up crying while I wrote the end of it. Quite possibly one of my favorite ever pieces. This one is both the inevitable end to my fic universe and something completely outside time. How did I manage this? Via Sheogorath's voicing. I don't think it gets more unreliable than that.

2) Metempsychosis

A very dear friend and fantastic teammate I met through Skywind sent me this prompt and it gave me such an excellent challenge not only to flex on weird god voice stuff again, but also to bust out some spoken word poetry tricks. I did end up recording myself reading this one too and it felt like old times. I loved all the layers of references I shoved into 1,000 words. It is also my first Morrowfic. And also one that reminded me what I am capable of even more strongly than some of my other projects did. 🥰

3) Serpens Caput

This one is newer, yes BUT OH MY GODS what a flex it was. ANOTHER Morrowfic but it's set in Ceth's fic universe featuring not only major character death but the mindset of a villain in his final moments. And we get to see Danger!Josh through his eyes. It was WEIRD. WEIRD WEIRD but so much fun. I don't think I've yelled so much about a fic whilst writing before. Ceth threw me this prompt, but I don't think was expecting this to end up...being this way (: Borrowed the description of Teldryn and Nerevar from her universe and just RAN WITH IT.

4) Little Dragon

This was written as part of my cute, happy LDB!Athis polycule AU where nothing is quite as horrifically messy as my main fic universe. It is a different kind of catharsis to write, often fun and humorous and a flex in that direction, since I didn't know what i was capable of—I always write pining and heartbreak lol. This came about as part of a fic writer's duel with AU (judged by Poly) which was honestly one of the coolest fandom experiences I've ever been in. It has become its own thing now with multiple other stories and I've been in yet another fandom duel since then. So it's all cute fuzzy feelings and happy memories and I love it to bits.

and last but certainly not least:

5) The World on Our Shoulders

My longfic which throws characters into extremely tough situations, handles horribly difficult themes and topics, shows people being messy and still finds ways to show it all with grace. It's what got me out of my multi-year writing slump and truly, truly brought me back to myself. So yes maybe some of the characters have some of my irl nonsense. Some scenes are far too relatable and it's a little scary sometimes how horrible that is, but it's a different kind of Catharsis. I love also the support its gotten so far for its specific type of storytelling structure as well as all the weird details that sprawl into other stories (Like my honorable mention written for Para, Recurse) and sequels and spin offs. It's been a great joy to be writing this and it's continued to inspire me. From draft one, which I wrote in challenge mode, posting every day this last February to now, where I am mid-ground-up-edit, I love this project to bits and will do all I can to see it through to the end. I see how much I can accomplish in this project. I see what can be done with common tropes and themes and even Fic in general. It's unalienated labor that I do for the sheer hell of it because I can and it's mine and I don't have to follow The Rules. There's something beautiful about that. It's one reason I get up at the crack of dawn every day -- to write for the sake of writing. Out of spite sometimes for all the ways the world tries to crush this kind of self expression out of us. This is my gem of a project. And I am proud of it and how far I've come since I started it. (:

So now it's your turn, if you got this far. Why do you write? How have your favorite fics you've written changed your perspective on the craft so far?

[mareenavee]

Bold the Facts | OC Tag Game

Hi there, I can do a tumblr post once in a while maybe LOL I was tagged to do this one by @throughtrialbyfire!! I'm tagging: @paraparadigm, @changelingsandothernonsense, @thana-topsy, @thequeenofthewinter, @dirty-bosmer, @miraakulous-cloud-district, @wildhexe, @expended-sleeper, @gilgamish, @tallmatcha, @rainpebble3, @oblivions-dawn, @kookaburra1701, @saltymaplesyrup, @snippetsrus, @elfinismsarts, @orfeoarte, @polypolymorph, @inquisition-dragonborn -- and you! YES if you'd like to do this tag game, go ahead and tag me back :> I'm gonna fill this one out for Nyenna, Teldryn, Athis and Varlais. (NPCs-Become-OCs are totally fine.) More below the cut coz this is actually quite a long one.

Nyenna

✧˖°. PERSONAL

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non-applicable ✪Class/Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

✧˖°. FAMILY

◒ Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted / found family / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

✧˖°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES

♦ extroverted / introverted / in-between ♦ disorganized / organized / in-between ♦ close-minded / open-minded / in-between ♦ calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual ♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in-between ♦ cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual ♦ patient / impatient / in-between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual ♦ leader / follower / in-between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between / highly contextual ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in-between ♦ traditional / modern / in-between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in-between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in-between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown / highly contextual ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown / highly contextual

✧˖°. BELIEFS

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don't know / don’t care / in a matter of speaking ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don't care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no / highly contextual

✧˖°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

✧˖°. ABILITIES

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✧˖°. HABITS

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

Teldryn

✧˖°. PERSONAL

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non-applicable ✪Class/Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

✧˖°. FAMILY

◒ Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children / never thought about having a family ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted / found family / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

✧˖°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES

♦ extroverted / introverted / in-between ♦ disorganized / organized / in-between ♦ close-minded / open-minded / in-between ♦ calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual ♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in-between ♦ cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual ♦ patient / impatient / in-between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual ♦ leader / follower / in-between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between / highly contextual ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in-between ♦ traditional / modern / in-between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in-between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in-between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown / highly contextual ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown / highly contextual

✧˖°. BELIEFS

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don't know / don’t care / in a matter of speaking ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don't care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no / highly contextual

✧˖°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

✧˖°. ABILITIES

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✧˖°. HABITS

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

Athis

✧˖°. PERSONAL

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non-applicable ✪Class/Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

✧˖°. FAMILY

◒ Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted / found family / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

✧˖°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES

♦ extroverted / introverted / in-between ♦ disorganized / organized / in-between ♦ close-minded / open-minded / in-between ♦ calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual ♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in-between ♦ cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual ♦ patient / impatient / in-between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual ♦ leader / follower / in-between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between / highly contextual ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in-between ♦ traditional / modern / in-between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in-between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in-between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown / highly contextual ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown / highly contextual

✧˖°. BELIEFS

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don't know / don’t care / in a matter of speaking ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don't care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no / highly contextual

✧˖°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

✧˖°. ABILITIES

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✧˖°. HABITS

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

Varlais

✧˖°. PERSONAL

$ Financial: wealthy / moderate / poor / in poverty ✚ Medical: fit / moderate / sickly / disabled / disadvantaged / non-applicable ✪Class/Caste: upper / middle / working / unsure / other ✔ Education: qualified / unqualified / studying / other ✖ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes / no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

✧˖°. FAMILY

◒ Children: had a child or children / has no children / wants children / never thought about starting a family ◑ Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) / has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased ◔ Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted / found family / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

✧˖°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES

♦ extroverted / introverted / in-between ♦ disorganized / organized / in-between ♦ close-minded / open-minded / in-between ♦ calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual ♦ disagreeable / agreeable / in-between ♦ cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual ♦ patient / impatient / in-between ♦ outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual ♦ leader / follower / in-between ♦ empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between / highly contextual ♦ optimistic / pessimistic / in-between ♦ traditional / modern / in-between ♦ hard-working / lazy / in-between ♦ cultured / uncultured / in-between / unknown ♦ loyal / disloyal / unknown / highly contextual ♦ faithful / unfaithful / unknown / highly contextual

✧˖°. BELIEFS

★ Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic ☆ Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don't know / don’t care / in a matter of speaking ✮ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ✯ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don’t know / don’t care / in a manner of speaking ❃ Belief in Aliens: yes / no / don’t know / don't care ✧ Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious ❀ Philosophical: yes / no / highly contextual

✧˖°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

❤ Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual ❥ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless ♥ Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious ❣ Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious ⚧ Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all ⚧ Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / agender / other / none / all

✧˖°. ABILITIES

☠ Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ≡ Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✍ Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none ✂ Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

✧˖°. HABITS

☕ Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober ☁ Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / quit / never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker ✿ Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict ✌ Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess ☻ Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater $ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic ♣ Gambling: never / rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

[mareenavee]

For the Asks to Spread Love, pick and answer 3 that you haven't been asked already! 🧡

Hello again, bri!! Thanks for sending more of these for me! I've really enjoyed catching up on them and thinking through these today!

Fandom Positivity asks from this game here.

10. A popular character you actually really like and why.

I do like me some rare characters most of all lol. My perspective is a bit biased because I love the ones I love and I don't mind if they aren't "popular" per se. (:

LOL -- The obvious answer is Teldryn, right? But I'm gonna talk about

💫Neloth 💫

instead.

I think he's popular to dunk on because he's been a very big pain in the ass in the games for centuries to everyone who will listen to him. I mean, since the events of Morrowind at minimum. (:

Why do I like him? Because of how he's been written by myself and a few friends -- namely @thana-topsy, @paraparadigm (TOOTHPICK!), and @thequeenofthewinter.

I love to see how other people take this character and run with what we're given in text ESPECIALLY considering how ridiculous he is to deal with and his general attitude toward other living things.

For myself, where I write him as a long term friend of Nerevarine!Teldryn Sero, I love to use his character as an opportunity to talk about the struggle of redemption. How does one redeem themselves from a lifetime of difficult choices made to fit into a specific perception? Does this perception eventually end up becoming a core facet of who you are as a person? If that is the case, can you change? Are the consequences of your choices enough to make you irredeemable? Further, can you forgive yourself if change does not come easily or if you return to old behaviors much too easily?

He's a complicated one, I think, especially by the events of Skyrim. He's not exactly estranged from the rest of House Telvanni, but the connection is tenuous and fraught as the House is still, apparently, recovering from the Red Year. In Morrowind it was very much the opposite. There's gotta be a kind of grief to this shift under the uncaring, hyperfocused exterior.

He's annoying, yes, but very interesting to me, and so he's in my fic. And he's actually a huge part of the latter half of the book.

11. Recommend a fic with an unusual/original headcanon or characterisation that you loved.

OH I'm SHOUTING OUT @changelingsandothernonsense's Danger!JOSH (aka Nerevarine Teldryn Sero)'s Nerevar-as-a-parasite situation in Serious Mistakes.

This angry spirit, more or less, lives in the ring and speaks into Teldryn's BRAIN and sometimes drives the entire car, so to speak and I've never ever read anything like it, holy shit. I'm a beta reader for this particular project and I literally cannot yell about it enough.

It's a novelization of the Teldryn Serious mod which was already intriguing, but AH. MY GOODNESS the Nerevar situation.

Let me show you. From chapter 4:

Aren’t you meant to be looking for something? “Oh, you’re still here?” Teldryn rasped, as if saying it out aloud mattered here. You should be thanking me. Teldryn grunted in annoyance, he had a point, he hated it when he was right. His mouth was dry. He wanted to stay where he was. Sleep. You can’t stay here! Get up! Teldryn groaned. Right again – the tide was coming in, if he didn’t find what he was looking for now, then it would be gone by morning. He needed his keys. Was there an Argonian on the beach? He couldn’t remember. His head hurt. He pinched the bridge of his nose, it did little to relieve the pressure. He always overdid it on the magicka, and now he was nauseous.

It's fucking cool, isn't it? (:

19. Give kudos to someone who leaves great comments.

OH GLADLY. Here's where I shout out @polypolymorph!!!

Okay so I could pick out a bunch of comments -- or novel-length responses. Each comment turns into an opportunity for a conversation and I'm always beside myself to hear back from her.

But right now, I'm still grinning ear to ear over, you guessed it. Eyestalks. Eye. Stalks.

(on this project here.)

[mareenavee]

Tell us 10 things about your version of Teldryn! Inquiring minds want to know :)

Hello my friend! Thank you so much for asking.

This is good because while I know a lot about all of my POV characters in my fic, I know I've shared exponentially more about Nyenna and that perhaps I have worked on her backstory more than the NPCs that I've brought into this tale. I'll preface by saying most of these are going to be HC material based on the direction I wanted this character to go in this story.

So without further ado, 10 Teldryn things from my fic, The World on Our Shoulders. Do be warned, some of these do get a little deep. There's a CW/TW on #8, so skip if you need to.

1) Teldryn has a tendency not to think through his decisions as hard as he probably should, even after all these years. He lives very much in the moment, more as a way to ignore/avoid thinking about his past than anything. He does tend to want to move on to the next logical goal and doesn't see sense in lingering. Lingering or waffling can only cause more discomfort later on mostly. He's not a procrastinator generally. For a lot of reasons, this occasionally can be a point of contention between him and Nyenna, because she thinks too much about decisions most of the time.

2) Teldryn is not at all a fan of dragonflies. I have shared an in-universe example in this snippet here. There's no particularly discernable reason WHY exactly, as they are not harmful. Everyone has something. Nyenna hates skeevers en masse. Athis is disgusted by vampires. Farkas is nauseous about frostbite spiders. Teldryn does NOT want dragonflies to land on him or buzz anywhere around his ears at all. No thank you. The big bug eyes and loud wings and the weird long metallic bodies really sort of freak him out in ways other things just don't. (I love them personally irl lol)

3) He is a big complainer regarding cold weather. He hates icy winds, he hates when snow gets into his shoes, he hates not being able to see in bad weather. If his ears go numb with cold, then nobody will hear the end of it at all, ever. This despite living on Solstheim and in Windhelm. He travelled through Skyrim for decades of his life, too. And yes, all of those decades he had negative things to say about the Godsforsaken snow much to the chagrin of his patrons.

4) He never believed he'd ever be the kind of person who deserved love or kindness. He never saw a future where he'd ever be able to settle down. It affected his relationships, often by self-sabotage. He'd be the sort that wouldn't believe it when someone would profess their love of him because he couldn't see in himself why they would even say something like that. The closer they'd try to get to him the more he'd push them away until the relationship was too fractured to put back together. He might have loved or got close enough to it before, but his fear and self-doubt closed those doors before too long. Even then, it was nothing like really getting to know Nyenna. He might have been boastful and forward and bold at first -- but that was nothing new. He behaved that way with anyone (yes anyone) he found particularly attractive. It was more than that. It was a slow dawning realization that she somehow already saw the kind of person he could be underneath all the darkness. Despite all the complications of their situation, after that, he certainly did fall hard.

5) He knew Neloth in the 3rd era and is one of the very few people Neloth may possibly miss in an abstract, miniscule sort of sense should they actually be removed from Nirn. He can be considered one of Teldryn's close friends, again in that sort of almost indecipherable sort of way. Back then, Neloth really wanted to mess with the prosperity of house Dres and Teldryn somehow managed to convince him the best way to do that would be to join the Twin Lamps with him. Unheard of, really, for a Telvanni, let alone one as high up and curmudgeonly as Neloth. Teldryn takes that as a personal win even if Neloth wasn't in it to be empathetic and helpful, really. This secret has caused Teldryn a bit of trouble since then, however.

6) If he doesn't like working with a specific patron, he won't talk at all besides what needs to be said for survival, despite how chatty and boastful he normally seems. It's why sometimes people he'd worked for might say things along the lines that he's rude, harsh or that he's unfriendly. It's not the case, really, once you get down past all the swagger and chitin.

7) He never got a chance to cross paths with the Hero of Kvatch. He'd been in Cyrodiil during the Oblivion Crisis and actually did put his sword arm to good use, but they always seemed to miss each other. He never once saw Martin Septim either, at least not to the best of his knowledge. This was in his early years of being a sellsword in general and everyone was too busy with the Crisis to bother asking why he always hid his face behind a strange chitin helmet. At the time, that suited him just fine.

8) CW/TW: Implied Suicidal Thoughts and Mentioned Substance Abuse. Skip to 9 if you need to.

He spent a great deal of time and money trying to forget to the point of near self-destruction. Of course, with Corprus, he can't really die by disease or aging or even poison. He couldn't do it himself despite trying once or twice. He'd have had to get himself killed somehow. All he knew was that without any kind of purpose, he was absolutely unmoored. Especially around the time of the Red Year, he felt so much of it was his fault, a direct result of his actions, fated or otherwise, especially when word started spreading that the general opinion was that the Hortator abandoned Morrowind when he was needed the most. The guilt was unbearable. His go-to strategy to be done with it all was picking fights while massively inebriated. However, even on these extended benders, people mostly felt sorry for him and would drag his drunk and/or high self back to the inn or to jail to sleep it off. There was no honor in cutting down a drunk, especially one clearly in so much pain. Eventually, Neloth and Geldis helped him get back on track. He still struggles with the guilt and regret, but has come a long way since the Red Year situation.

9) He has a strained relationship with religion. He's not sure if he was played by Azura or if it was something more, but hasn't ever been able to shake the feeling that if he'd only done a few things differently, he'd never have gotten tied up in the Nerevarine nonsense to begin with. He'd never had been caught and arrested if he'd just paid a little more attention back before the start of things. The ambiguity gnaws at him, because he'd talked with Azura and he has Moon-and-Star and there's no real concrete way to determine where the lies end and the prophecy begins and just who or what is responsible for pushing him the direction he needed to be. It's also why he hates the term "Fate" but can't seem to find other vocabulary for all the coincidences he'd been wrapped up in over the course of his life. Azura doesn't speak to him directly anymore, but sends him little visions in his dreams once in a while that he generally can't quite determine the meaning of, usually regarding a decision he'd already made.

10) He didn't kill Vivec. He couldn't bring himself to do it, even after everything with the Ordinators. Even after everything with the Heart. Even after all the manipulation and bullshit that got him to the end of that path. Even after everything he lost by having to be this legendary hero, this paragon, the Hortator and Nerevarine. Azura had said he'd be responsible for the destruction of the Tribunal as the Nerevarine, but once Vivec was mortal again, death would come for him in no time at all. It wouldn't be by Teldryn's hand. And to this day, he has absolutely no idea where Vivec ended up or why and doesn't care to know. He will walk away if anyone brings it up in conversation, even if it's a bunch of scholars discussing history. He'd get into a bar fight over the mention of Tribunal worship. There's trauma there he's absolutely pushed aside.

[mareenavee]

Been meaning to pick your professional brain a bit, so... Tell us about rewriting/drafting/editorial pass! What happens when you read to edit? How is it different when you read someone else's work vs your own? What do you look for, what do you notice differently from when you're in writing mode? Any advice to get better at the whole editing thing, and what typical advice that we often see (kill your darlings, never do x, always do x, write for yourself, know your audience...) do you think could use some nuance or explanation? And maybe most importantly, what advice would you give a starting beta reader? What makes for a good beta reader and/or editor, especially when there's no monetary transaction involved and it's all donated labor? What are some of the essential skills?

Hello my friend!! Thank you so, so much for asking me about editing!! I am over the moon. I love this part.

I'm lucky because while it's been my job for quite a long while now (often among other responsibilities) work hasn't ground out the joy of it. I prefer to edit fiction, of course, over corporate copy and advertising, but am honestly happy to dig into either kind of project. The point of it is to bring the right words to the forefront of whatever the written material is, I think. To make the piece the best it can be, and at the same time show the writers how capable they really are. (: So let me dive right in! (THIS IS LONG, by the way, so under the cut! The irony is not lost on me about wordiness and editing and then producing this LOL but it's alright. I'm a chatty person online and this is more or less conversational.)

What is an editorial pass?

There's several kinds of editing. What I do most for paid corporate work is proofreading -- which is catching typos and grammar mistakes and correcting them. This is usually a first pass of any given project. This pass doesn't usually suggest changes -- things are left as is except typos and grammar mistakes. This is sometimes also called copyediting, though copyediting is the next step up and also checks for style consistency, among a few other things, especially in academic and corporate work.

Next is line editing -- this is more checking for word choice at the sentence level. We're looking to make sure things flow together nicely, and that we're cutting the fluff out when necessary. When things get too wordy and there are cleaner ways to phrase something, a line edit pass will catch these things.

Next past that is content editing -- this is done on a full manuscript or story to check that the ideas are complete and the story flows together logically. This should be paragraph and chapter level and should also check for consistency in tone and authorial voice.

After that is my personal favorite, which is structural editing. This is actually technically what you should start with if your manuscript is already complete. But we'll get into the difference between having work beta read and having work edited below. Anyway structural editing is going to check for, well, structure -- organization, flow and quality of the book in its entirety.

There will be notes regarding concerns and big picture issues with the story. These usually won't include detail-level edits, though some professional editors do offer multiple passes on the same manuscript. If your structural edit is mostly glowing praise with few key concerns or suggestions, you can move onto more detail oriented edits to address those specific concerns.

And an even higher level editing that can happen even before a manuscript is complete is Developmental Editing. I like to think of this as an outline critique or consultation more so, as this pass won't be rewriting or doing any sort of detail work. The editor takes your idea and helps ask the right questions to make sure you're organizing your ideas to the best of your ability. They help an author to see the book as a reader would see it.

What happens when you read to edit?

Reading for enjoyment is actually as important to editing as it is for writing. The key takeaway is that an for either, you need to have a extremely solid grasp on the components that make a good story. For an editor, especially so when the 'rules' might be broken purposefully by an author. Honestly, a lot of it is still opinion based. Two different editors, generally, will have different insights for you reading the same manuscript, biased by how much they read and what their specialties are. Most editors, too, will have an ear for grammar which nobody wants to talk about but it's true. You don't need to memorize every single tiny little grammatical detail to explain in full to your authors when you edit and catch errors. But an editor usually can hear when things are off more or less and can provide resources if a mistake is noticed as a consistent issue.

Mostly when you're reading to edit and I'll use structural editing for an example here, you're always thinking of how things flow together and how the story threads intertwine and connect. You're thinking through how the story will land for a casual reader. There's a lot of work in the background in this case, and it takes practice to be able to point out when elements fall flat. You as an editor should also be able to suggest ways to fix the flat parts of the story -- and to do that you need to have read widely in many genres. Read for the sake of understanding how stories come together. Read while taking extensive mental notes as you go. Each book is a learning opportunity.

How is it different when you read someone else's work vs your own?

I actually just reblogged a post about this that sums it up pretty nicely. When you're writing you're so close to your own work it can be hard not only to spot errors but to let go of work you've written. It can also be difficult to see where your work shines because it's not how you envisioned it in your head. Writing is an entirely different process, even if you can go back in with good editing eyes, again it comes down to perspective. You're too close to your own work. You've spent so much more time with it. You know every detail (presumably) and might not be able to see beyond that. The editor, on the other hand, and also a beta reader, will be able to shift perspectives a bit based on their own biases and specialties and help spot things that weren't obvious in the thick of the project.

For me I know I am not as strong a writer as I am an editor for this exact reason. (Regardless of what others think of my writing, this is still true lol) I get a sort of tunnel vision on what I'm attempting to get on paper. A second set of eyes helps point out what needs more attention. An editor should be a project's biggest cheerleader because our goal is to bring out the best an author can do. We can see the threads of greatness as we go through a piece. When we suggest things, it's always to make the piece stronger and for the story beats to hit harder. So this piece really comes down to perspective. When I read my own work, I still am very much mired in it. When I read someone else's work, I get to experience it without it having lived in my head for x amount of time. It's a fresh view of the text, and that can often be invaluable.

What do you look for, what do you notice differently from when you're in writing mode?

This kind of plays off the last few questions, more or less but here I'll switch to self-editing. It really is a mindset change and it's incredibly difficult on one's own writing. Usually I need to take a day or two to let the chapter (for instance) I'm working on simmer and move on to the next thing to get my mind out of the weeds about it more or less. Then I go back in with the goal to proofread and do line level editing.

Because I am the author, I'm always trying to keep in mind overarching structures and plots. (I'm a planner rather than a pantser/discovery writer normally though there are exceptions when I add to the plan later.) This does make "editing mode" a little bit easier for me, besides being a professional editor. I'm actively trying to keep the threads together in editing mode, and actively looking for accidental repetition, places where fluff can be cut out, areas where the words sound off/discordant and can be improved, and personally I am always trying to be sure each line of dialogue or inner monologue SOUNDS like the point of view character I'm working with. This comes from asking the right questions of your work -- "Why would x character respond this way?" But that's a whole other topic. Someone could ask me about how I handle character building another time if they'd like (: But it's all part of the editing process.

In writing mode the goal, at least for me, is to get the idea out of my head and into a draft / on paper. I have the bones of the story in my outline and now I need to get the words out. First drafts are incredibly important and are not -- I repeat -- are NOT garbage. These are the rough foundations and the effort is not wasted. You can't refine anything if there's nothing on the page. The first draft is gold. It is the authentic creative writing experience. The rest is editing. (: And the revision process, the editing, helps bring forward the gem of an idea you had to begin with.

Any advice to get better at the whole editing thing?

The two biggest pieces of advice I have for this is to read widely and to come to your work with fresh eyes before you attempt to edit.

Reading widely means to read outside of your preferred genre as often as you can. This can also mean reading craft books -- ie things that talk about the writing process or even the editing process -- and it can mean consuming other kinds of media with a focus on storytelling like video games, ttrpgs or movies etc. It also means paying attention while reading, always keeping an eye on your own answer to the question: "Why does this work so well?" or conversely "why do I hate this?" (: Reading critically is a habit that not a lot of us innately have. You do have to put in the work just like with writing to read closely in a way that benefits you as a writer and an editor.

Now for the next part -- walking away from your draft entails two things. One, that you've written all you could before you turned on editing mode and two you've given yourself a day or two to do something else (or continue writing) before you return to what you want to edit. It's so much harder to catch what you're missing when you immediately turn back and edit what you've just written. (With exception.) You can catch more typos, and fix the fluff or underwriting when you've given your mind a second to rest.

Improvement comes with practice, too. So purposefully trying to edit, and purposefully trying to read critically and building a habit out of these things will lead to a better understanding of the craft in general. All of it translates to writing strong first drafts and being able to revise more effectively. It's cumulative. Nobody is born a perfect writer or a perfect editor.

One last tip that might be a little impractical depending on your circumstances is -- if you want to get better at editing quickly, read your work out loud. It's easier to find clunky areas as you verbalize them.

What typical advice that we often see (kill your darlings, never do x, always do x, write for yourself, know your audience...) do you think could use some nuance or explanation?

I could write about each of these but this post is already long! So I'll pick my favorite. "Write what you know" doesn't mean "Stay in your lane and write about your retail job" for example. To me, it's more like even in a fantasy world, you can bring in things you've experienced and give them to your characters.

Not a single one of us is as boring as we think we are (: I learned this when I was going through the Creative Nonfiction track in my undergrad creative writing degree program. Even something so average told from your perspective can be fascinating to someone else. So apply it to your story -- all your experiences, your emotions, whatever you can throw at the canvas so to speak.

Your character isn't a reflection of you if you don't want them to be. But they can still go through a fantasy version of troubles that evoke the same kind of big emotions that you've been through. It can be kind of cathartic -- at least in my experience, it can be.

What advice would you give a starting beta reader? What makes for a good beta reader and/or editor, especially when there's no monetary transaction involved and it's all donated labor? What are some of the essential skills?

So first, the difference between a beta reader and editor does come down to the donation of time. You're going to get different responses based on the skill of your beta reader and how much attention and time they have to donate. The ideal beta reader will be someone who is in your intended audience and is generally a close reader, even if they're not there looking for grammar mistakes or anything like that. They'll have a working idea of their own personal answers to what they feel works well and what doesn't when they read in general.

Generally a beta reader will be a set of eyes that will catch your grammar mistakes and typos but probably won't be providing line level suggestions. They'll function as a light structural editor or work more or less on a chapter level. Some beta readers (like myself because I am also a editor) might donate more time and effort to the project than others and be able to make professional suggestions, but this is not to be expected or requested.

If you're just starting out as a beta reader, it might be good to practice on maybe a published novella or short story first, low stakes because the author can't see your comments. Begin the process of reading widely and asking yourself "Why (or why not) does this work for me as a reader?" "What makes this enjoyable (or not?)" "What is it about this piece that is done well (or not?)" The grammar practice can come later -- refresh on the rules, but again don't worry about being perfect. The biggest skill you can build is reading critically. Practice, practice, practice. And when you offer your skills as a beta reader, let your author know if it's your first piece. Sometimes a very fresh set of eyes are just the thing a project needs, so don't be shy about saying so.

On the skills needed -- beta readers should not be shy to say exactly what they're thinking in a kind, constructive way. This can take some practice. But if you're going to point out something that's not working, it's good to have an idea as to why and be able to convey that. It doesn't have to be to the level of a suggestion and certainly not to the level of a rewrite or being able to provide comps/resources.

Being able to provide comments of your thoughts in a structured and logical way based on your opinion of what you've read comes with practice, of course. It's essential because an author is generally looking for specific feedback when they're asking you to beta read their work to make sure their story is hitting as intended for their intended audience.

Again having a good ear for grammar is going to be important here, too. You don't have to be perfect about it, either, or memorize every tiny technical detail. But being able to hear when something is off is useful again because while writing, an author is very close to their work and might not catch it.

And last -- remind yourself you are human. You aren't going to be able to catch every error. You aren't going to be perfect. (listen, not even every editor is going to catch every single mistake. Again, we're human!) You are not a machine. The act of being a close reader for an author and donating your time to assist them is selfless. Nobody should be expecting perfection. This is a collaborative effort between audience and author in this case. You get to make suggestions and perhaps change an author's mind about the direction of some things in their stories. Authors can choose not to take advice, too, without needing to explain anything at all. It doesn't mean the effort is wasted. It comes down to having a second set of eyes on the project with the intent to bring out the best.

Beta reader or editor, your job is mostly to be the work's cheerleader and see past the rough edges to the gem underneath, and then show the author how truly talented they are when they've forgotten in the thick of it. These are simply two different levels of the same kinds of tasks (:

[mareenavee]

For the kiss prompt: Argis the Bulwark/Ondolemar 8. "...in secrecy."

Hi Topsy :> Here's these two adorable idiots for you. I really appreciate this prompt! It's been a joy to write!! (Exceedingly aro of me, but I did also use this as an excuse to get some worldbuilding for the main fic done lol. Thanks for inadvertently helping me make a major character decision for Ondolemar.) Now without further ado:

A Heavy Truth

(Follows Chapter 13 of The World on Our Shoulders & Contains Spoilers For That Story!)

Sixteen days.  

It had been sixteen days since Ondolemar had sent Argis with information for Sybille in the Blue Palace. The trip should have taken maybe a week at worst, especially with the funds he’d used for a carriage. What had happened?

Ondolemar looked around Vlindrel Hall, which was dark and depressing, especially in Argis’s absence. Everything was hewn of stone and decorated with garish Dwemer accents, brass gleaming wrong in the strange light of the overlarge fireplace. It was still cold. It was always cold when he was gone. Everywhere in Skyrim. He hated it here. Hated it. Why had he bought this sorry excuse for a house was beyond him. Expectations, likely. He’d gotten comfortable, even when all his furniture was made of rocks. Even when his only company were thralls and Nords. And now this.

He was letting his mind wander again, which wasn’t the best in dire situations. There had to be a reason. Talsgar hadn’t heard anything, nor Faendal, far flung as the both of them had been recently. Was he local then? Stuck somewhere? He sighed and paced the living room, running a hand along the dusty bookshelves that he’d purchased when he bought the house. Mahogany. Not boulders, like everything else. Even the Orcs who’d delivered them had struggled hefting the things up the cliff face this place had been carved into. It was a bit of a chore to walk up here after a full day’s work. He could have spent his coin better elsewhere.

He was doing it again. Thinking of anything else instead of the nagging thought that maybe something had gone more awry. He wouldn’t touch the edge of the fear, sharp as it felt. As much as the worry ached, he had to keep it together. He had to. Argis was one facet of the mission. Able to be trusted, and more than capable. More than. But if he had been lost…

Gods, no. No, he wouldn’t assume the worst now. Couldn’t. He braced against the bookshelf, swaying on his feet, feeling lightheaded as images bombarded him of rabid bears charging, or more dragons swooping down out of doomed skies. He blinked, and the emptiness of this Godsforsaken house did nothing to calm him. He straightened, pulling at his grey tunic, trying to feel grounded or real again. He undid his hair from the bun he’d tied it back in and shook it out with a sigh, silver-blond strands catching on the edges of his chewed nails. He was losing touch, obviously. How long had it been since he’d slept correctly? Too long. Empty beds were no longer as comfortable as they used to be, after all. -> Read the rest on AO3

[mareenavee]

From the OC asks, for Ondolemar:

What are their prejudices? What groups have they come to think of as 'other'? Mages? Nords? Elves? Lollygaggers?

ohohoho. I'll let Ondolemar answer this for himself because, even though Argis asked him not to, he's muttering under his breath.

(From this amazing game here.)

12. What are their prejudices? What groups have they come to think of as 'other'? Mages? Nords? Elves? Lollygaggers?

Argis chimes in from the background, "Love, don't say—" "—Nords." Argis sighs heavily, then goes off to make tea, because he'll definitely need it. Ondolemar watches him then turns back and grins. "Yes, I think I've been in Skyrim long enough now that it's no big secret that I know quite well how obviously other Nords are from basically everyone else. It's ridiculous. I mean it is their own country, and they are wont to just...do whatever it is they feel is appropriate, but I mean..." He pauses and drops his voice to a whisper. "...a war? Over Talos? Of all things, truly? You would think in this frozen rock of a place they'd be more cautious about absurd wastes of resourc—" Argis clears his throat. Ondolemar throws him a sheepish look as he is handed a mug of tea.

"Is this the tea Nyenna sent?" he asks.

"No, it's the stuff you stole from your mother's imports last we were in Solitude."

"Oh, yes, right, thank you, love." Ondolemar turns and quickly tucks a stark white strand of hair behind his ear. He lets the silence end up on the edge of uncomfortable and speaks only after he takes one more sip of tea. "Alright, alright. Fine. If not Nords, then... Well. Looking at me, and knowing who and what I am, this may come as a bit of a surprise." He crosses one ankle over the other knee and takes another sip of his tea. "But the other that is the real problem—and not a joke in the least—are the Thalmor." He pauses, fully expecting some kind of protest, but is met with yet more silence. "Right. Thalmor. The thralls. Like the guards outside my home. Like Mother." His face falls almost imperceptibly. "But then, knowing that, I suppose it makes it easier to understand why I must do what I've been doing, doesn't it?"

[mareenavee]

8 and 10 for the worldbuilding oc asks for Nyenna (and Teldryn if you want to)

Hello, hello :D Good to hear from you!! Thank you for these!

These are OC/Worldbuilding asks for your inner social science nerd for Nyenna & Teldryn from my fic The World on Our Shoulders!

Ask game is here! (@paraparadigm is a treasure. Thank you so much for making this list. These are great!)

Long post, ofc. Under the cut :D

8. How does your OC approach the line between public and private? What sorts of things does your OC not share with anyone, what might they share with the people closest to them, and what do they happily share with anyone who might ask? What is their definition of property if they have one? In turn, does your OC think they belong to something as well? (A state, a collective, a cause, a person, etc)

Nyenna would have rather disappeared into the crowds. She and her brother had been a target of the Thalmor and had to be ultra careful of the kind of information they shared about themselves for the longest time. Her ultimate goal was to get to Solstheim and then eventually disappear into a comfortable life in Morrowind. That life didn't, and probably would never have happened (though I did write an AU or two where there was an attempt.)

Being the LDB invites in speculation on who she is and what she's done. People begin to hear tales of her deeds and there becomes this whole persona built up from those expectations. So most of who she really is ends up being reserved for those she is closest with. Her story thus far as it actually is are saved for friends.

As for property, she owns Breezehome and is extremely careful with her budgeting. She'd learned a long time ago not to be super materialistic, because everything can fall away in an instant. Hang on to only what's necessary and nothing more... This is still true after her destiny, even though she'd spent a lot of time, energy and funds on building something out of her house and creating a home.

For a long time, she felt somewhat unmoored, and not like she belonged anywhere. Home was a concept she no longer had...until she tried to build a life before her destiny came calling. She feels connected to the Companions, though she never became a full member. There's a sense of duty the further she gets into the weeds of her quest to Skyrim. Later on, there'll be a sort of stance not exactly with the Empire but against the Thalmor, so eventually she'll belong to the network led by Ondolemar, Argis & Varlais. (More on that soon, stay tuned!) And further down the line, which is hinted at in the prologue of World, her main focus will be her family, and her daughter and all the chaos that will unfold from there.

Teldryn on the other hand wears a bit of a mask generally speaking, literally and figuratively more or less. He has a persona he falls into like comfortable shoes and puts on the swagger and sarcasm overtly. He will happily boast about his swordsmanship skills. He has a lot of opinions he's gathered from traveling with a variety of patrons all over Tamriel, more or less. It's still significantly who he is, but once he's comfortable with a person, that veneer falls away pretty significantly. He's got centuries of lessons that he's learned so even though he can be a total fool sometimes, he's more wise than even he knows...which can be interesting. It's how he manages to say the right thing and be incredibly insightful at certain times, even when he doesn't believe he ever could be of use to anyone.

Even so there'll be a lot he still doesn't like to share with most people, and pieces of his background that still upset him to speak about, that still causes him nightmares. That fact that he is The Nerevarine is only known by so few people that it can be counted on one hand by this point in the 4th era. And even those people don't know the depth of his trauma. Even Nyenna, at first, doesn't understand the depth of the situation.

For property, he's definitely forgone a lot of that over the years, even artifacts. He has what he can carry and will travel with. If he were to have a prized possession, it's his sword, Chillrend, which he got when he became a nightingale. (Yes, he's a nightingale. No, even though he's met Nocturnal personally, he still isn't very religious lol.) His chitin armor is pretty precious to him, too. He gets it repaired all the time in Raven Rock. In fact, his helmet probably saved him from a swift death by Shouting and needs repair again where we are in what's published.

As for belonging...well. Teldryn is an orphan from the Imperial City who was shipped off to Blacklight when he was a child, meant to go with some relative but he ran away before that could happen. He had no real sense of home or belonging, really, even when as an adult he got caught and shipped to Vvardenfell and [see events of Morrowind.] Out of spite and out of being stubborn, he made friends with Neloth. With Neloth's help he became Teldryn Sero (was given the surname, he didn't come with it lol) and joined House Telvanni. Perhaps he is not the wisest, nor the most likely to study...but it mattered. Still matters, even with the house in the state it is during the 4th era. Later on, just as I mentioned above with Nyenna the chaos unfolding around their family will become priority one.

10. What social persona does your OC perform most frequently, and when do they show other aspects of themselves (and to whom)? Is your OC code-switching between social persona depending on context, or do they stay consistent? Is social adaptation something they feel is necessary or are they uneasy about it? Do they believe that one has to be honest in their self-presentation, and is that aligned with the society you’re writing or is one expected to have multiple social “faces”? Under what circumstances does your OC show a different facet/angle of themselves?

OH this one is super good actually. I'm assuming Social Persona here is similar to social roles, which I may have answered before but I'll do it again! For Nyenna, she performs the role of hero most often. Which is nuanced as all get out because she does have to code-switch and balance between other roles like student, friend, wife and eventually mother among others. But her outward persona with people she does not know is a web of bard song, expectations and assumptions tied up with being The Hero.

Social adaptation is always, always necessary and has been for most of her life. When she was a young daughter of nobility, she had a different set of expectations she was supposed to follow. When she was on the run from the Thalmor, there was yet a different set of masks she had to wear. When she is handling her destiny, she has to approach things carefully because of what she believes it means to be a hero. And how her mistakes are perceived by the people she's supposed to be saving.

She would love to be nothing more than honest, but it becomes impossible after a time. Impossible first because she does not fully understand her role or even really herself especially at the beginning of her journey as the Last Dragonborn. Her forward facing persona is always The Hero. The people closest to her get to see the rest of of her facets, so to speak.

For Teldryn, he's complicated. He's been through so much hell and has lived through a lot of complicated shit. Lots of things he'd rather forget. But it doesn't change the fact that he'd been in the role of The Hero before. He's not, any longer. He's a warrior, an employee, a student (begrudgingly, though he'd leave this behind as well,) a friend, a partner, a -- husband? Not quite, but some of the aspects of that role eventually fall on his shoulders, and then eventually a father among other roles with The Warrior (Knight/Soldier) role being sort of forward in a lot of the fic followed close behind by friend.

Teldryn has spent the majority of the last few decades (centuries) trying very hard to leave the role of The Hero behind. He'd hit his rock bottom and his friends pulled him out of a spiral. He's trying to do better. And by the time he meets Nyenna, he's still on the fence about if he should be his authentic self with her. She sees through the mask though. There's a weird sort of connection between them and, while he's remiss to talk about fate or believe in fate, what else could it have been, really? He does eventually remain honest with her for the most part, but still spares her the details of his nightmares for the longest time. Besides Nyenna and his handful of friends, though, it is absolutely mask on, Warrior persona a hundred percent of the time. He has no qualms about this type of code switching. That said, even if he's in his Warrior role, he'll still manage eventually to say how he feels even if it's more caustic-sounding. He doesn't lie quite as much as leave out the details he feels doesn't suit the conversation. (he does still lie though.)

He's completely fine with having vastly different facets depending on his company. He lived in fear for a long while, then lived without purpose and wrecked his life and the lives of people he tried to be close to or those who tried to be close to him. Only a few people saw him at his worst and still stuck around. He wears a mask literally and figuratively around most people. It's safer that way, he feels, even if most of the danger has passed. Though with his job being what it is, it's still very plausible that he's got enemies, somewhere. Though technically, he's the best swordsman in Morrowind. What harm could they be? So when he trusts Nyenna as she trusts him, it's kind of a Big Deal. He thought for the longest time he wasn't worthy of acquiring new friends, let alone someone who means so very much to him as she eventually does. (I hope that was interesting for you <3 thank you for asking!)

[mareenavee]

Get to Know Me? Maybe More 'Let Me Give You Media Recs' Tag Game!

Thank you, @orfeoarte!! I'm gonna add a few of these because I don't know the meaning of Television or Film anymore hehe. (More just I can't seem to sit still very long anymore.)

Tagging @changelingsandothernonsense because you do, in fact, have good show recs! and @thequeenofthewinter, @archangelsunited, @gilgamish, @tallmatcha, @paraparadigm, @polypolymorph, @thana-topsy, @wildhexe, @elfinismsarts, @saltymaplesyrup and you. Yeah, you, I've tagged you so tag me back! LAST SONG: Sedated by Hozier. It was him or Florence, percentage wise. (: LAST MOVIE: I honestly cannot for the life of me remember the last time I sat through a whole movie. CURRENTLY WATCHING: See above LOL FAVORITE VIDEO GAME: Skyrim. Of course. Well of all time? Final Fantasy Tactics, Breath of the Wild and Stardew Valley all rank right up there. Witcher 3, too! And if it weren't for mechanics, Morrowind. That's just barely below the rest, though :> CURRENT VIDEO GAME: Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, Morrowind and Skyrim. Of course. CURRENTLY READING: So. Many. Fanfics. First four open tabs? Always Read the Fine Print (Again) @paraparadigm, In the Midst of Winter, @thequeenofthewinter, Tides to Carry us Home @gilgamish, and Foul Redemption, @archangelsunited Then The Adventures of Amina Al-Sirafi by SA Chakraborty and The Way of Kings by Brandon Sanderson and listening to Babel by RF Kuang. LAST THING SEARCHED FOR WRITING/ART PURPOSES: What various alcohols in Morrowind are made of.

[mareenavee]

On Repeat

Hi everyone! A music related situation? I was tagged by @thequeenofthewinter and @ladytanithia

and am tagging: @paraparadigm, @thana-topsy, @polypolymorph, @changelingsandothernonsense, @tallmatcha, @elfinismsarts, @gilgamish, @throughtrialbyfire, @wildhexe, @orfeoarte, @archangelsunited, @dirty-bosmer, @kookaburra1701, @snippetsrus, @oblivions-dawn, @rhiannon1199 and YOU. If I've forgotten you, then feel free to consider yourself tagged :>

Rules:

Go to your "On Repeat" list on Spotify and share the first 10 songs which appear.

Sedated by Hozier

Unknown / Nth by Hozier

Litost by x ambassadors

Cascades (Dirt Road version) by Metric

No Light, No Light by Florence + The Machine

Who We Are by Hozier

Destroyer by Phantogram

When the Party's Over by Billie Eilish

Shrike by Hozier

Stay by Sara Bareilles

This is mostly off of my Athis Sads playlist to be perfectly honest LOL Destroyer is off of Nyenna's which I listen to just as often.

Anyway that was fun :>