#<- thats how they used to get my ass to clock into work when i didnt want to 😭 told my boss my ride broke down once (half lie) and she

[pcktknife]

my dad randomly stopped by our city a few days ago and ended up asking if i like boys (in the are you gay tone) and i fumbled very badly in front of both him and my mother

[evieelyzabethh]

Warmer than a Comforter

pairing(s): Spike x fem!reader

summary: it wasn't unusual for Spike to 'break' into your apartment, but it was unusual for him to want to spend the night.

warnings: very long (4.4k words), spike being a simp, one bed trope, dry humping, thigh fucking, masturbation, some fingering, slight praise, Spike being Spike, a smidge of possessiveness, and thats about it

It was no secret to anyone your favorite time of day was long after the sun went down. A full-time college student who worked a part time job on top of that was no easy feat. Your time during the day was never your time, it was your shitty professors time who assigned reading after reading that needed to be read for the never-ending stream of papers and theses, it belonged to your shitty boss who piled on tons of paperwork and demanded you be at his beck and call even after you clocked out. As much as you loved them, your time off belonged to your friends; patrolling, looking through dusty-old books, trying not to die every time you stepped out of your apartment.

When you got home (if there was no patrolling to be done), it was your time and while you were tired, you made time for your nightly routine. You'd slip off your shoes and walk in the dark to make it to your room to turn on your lamp, because you'd be damned if you were turning on one of the big lights this late.

You would usually strip down and dig a pair of pajamas out of your drawers before taking a scalding shower. You'd brush your teeth and wash your face, maybe if you had the energy, you'd do a face mask and paint your nails. You'd turn on your stereo or switch on your TV to fall asleep to the fuzzy sound and soft light. This, of course, is what you'd be doing right now had you not walked into your house with company.

You could see him lounging on your bed, the darkness of his attire somehow darker than your unlit room. His duster slung on the back of your desk chair, only clothed in some tight navy shirt and jeans.

"What are you doing here, Spike?" You crossed your arms over your chest, annoyed when you realized he had his dirty ass boots on your bed.

"M' paying my favorite Scooby a visit." You walked over to turn on your lamp, giving you enough light to see how smug he was. His arms sat behind his head, his eyes glittering with amusement. He was doing this to annoy you. He did most things just to annoy you.

"Pay another Scooby a visit." You were dead tired, practically forcing your eyes open. You had just gotten back from work, your bag still in your hand which you used to knock his legs off your bed. He could've been stubborn, but he let you.

You stripped off your hoodie, flashing him your stomach as your undershirt rose with the movement. He whistled, "Scandalous."

"Get out of my apartment." You tossed your hoodie at him while rolling your eyes. He caught it midair, bringing it to his nose to sniff it.

"Smells different. You using a different bodywash?" You hummed as you walked around your room to find something suitable to wear to bed. It was dreadfully hot out, even worse than what you'd expect from a California summer. You had at least 3 fans going anytime you were here, especially since your landlord could never seem to find a permanent solution to the junky A.C unit.

"Midnight Rose. Real fancy stuff." You hadn't even noticed a difference, but of course Spike would. Vampire senses had a way of being intrusive in a way that was only helpful when it came to your cycle and saving you bed sheets.

"I like the other one better: the cocoa butter one. It was fainter. You smelt more like you." You scoffed.

"Duly noted." Your hands roamed over the old t-shirts from high school and camisole tops so old the straps had snapped on a couple of them.

Spike sat up on your bed, untying the laces on his shoes haphazardly before setting them by your bedroom door. He roamed around like you had been, picking up bottles of nail polish and flipping through one of the books on your shelf.

"You could spare me a bit of your attention, love. I mean I did go through the trouble of-"

"Breaking into my apartment?" You interrupted.

"On second thought, it was a bit easy. I pushed it a bit and the window came right out. Are you leaving it open for somebody?" His tone was supposed to sound much more teasing than it did. There was a pang in his chest, probably of jealousy. Much to his chagrin, he was jealous a lot these days and he couldn't quite tell if his frequent visits were enabling that or the very cause of it. Either way, it was hard not to just crawl through your window anytime he pleased.

You acted like you were annoyed and if he had a dollar for every time you threatened to call Buffy on him, he wouldn't need to dumpster dive for furniture. If he had another dollar for every time, you never followed through, he'd be even richer. You said it's because you could handle yourself without her help, but, admittedly, you didn't hate his company that much.

As far as house guests go, it could be worse. It's not like he eats all your food, talks your ears off, or is unfunny. He was just there. A pain in your ass sometimes, like when he insists on being half a step behind you during patrols and never fails to tell you how great your ass looks from behind. Never a malevolent presence, just annoyingly noticeable.

His boots were clunky, and he smelled of faint cigarettes and alcohol. He also hated silence. He was fidgety and anxious, even if his intentions were stealth, he couldn't help but break the tension and open his mouth. At times against his will, he just wanted to be noticed that bad. He just needed to be around you that bad.

"I keep telling the landlord to fix it, but he insists it's just fine. 'Nothin' some glue won't fix'." But you had tried gluing it. Had it not been for the clear shit jammed in the lock, the window would've just come right open with the flick of a finger.

"I could fix it for you." He went ignored while you had made your way to your bathroom, taking your hair down from the claw clip it had been stuck in for the past few hours. A slight moan of relief slipped through your lips as your fingers carded through it to massage your scalp.

"You know how to fix windows?"

"Well...no. But it can't be that hard. I've been around a few hundred years, surely I can figure out how to fix a bloody window." What he meant to say (if he had the balls) was that he would be more than happy to learn how to fix a window for you. It would give him an excuse to hang around, it would keep him in your good graces for a solid month, and he wouldn't have to break an entering anymore. Granted, his preferred place of entry had long been broken and he could always come through the front door, but it was a matter of principle.

You looked him up and down, trying to decipher if this was a set up for a joke or if he was actually serious, but he kept his head down. He hadn't been able to blush since he was a human, but the habit had a way of rearing its head for you.

He was so pretty too. With his high cheekbones and the way the warm light made his complexion look less ghastly. As ironic and cliche as it would be to say, he looked slightly angelic. Like one who fell from Heaven and donned the dark and mysterious charade to make it hurt less. He would burn away under a cross just to make it back to Heaven. Nearly break his spine falling out of windows and bleed out taking stabs if it meant he was closer to your doors. If there was one thing Spike did well, it was devotion.

"You wouldn't even know where to start. I'll just call Xander or something."

"What're you gonna do that for!"

"Because, Spike," you laughed incredulously, confused as to if this was going to become an argument or form a chip on his shoulder. "If I want something fixed, I'm going to call someone who does it for a living."

"But would Xander do it for free?"

"Would you?"

"I wouldn't charge anything of monetary value." You snorted, not surprised at all with his answer.

"You are such a whore, you know that?"

"What can I say, baby?" He leaned against the door frame of your bathroom, where you stood staring at your reflection in the mirror. He was happy that his nonexistent reflection could betray him. He was grateful to be a part of this routine - your routine- in a way that didn't disrupt your peace. It was soft. Almost domestic.

You were so meticulous about the way you scrubbed your face and brushed your teeth. He liked how when you took off your makeup the glitter remained. You sparkled at the right angles, really fucking sparkled. Of course, he was going to sit and stare at you; mascara still not completely wiped away, hair tied back with a fuzzy headband, lips agitated from being bit throughout the day. It was poetic. Second nature to him. He didn't need to breath, but it came to him then, overwhelming and filling his lungs like water until he was full as he stared at you in the mirror with not even his own reflection to judge him.

"I'm gonna hop in the shower."

"How rude, without me?" Damn, he sounded like a bloody idiot. You only looked him up and down, trying to appear deeply disgusted but stopped just shy of mildly annoyed.

"Get out of my apartment before I stake you." You slammed the bathroom door in his face, hiding your blush behind the wood.

"That's not a no." His voice is muffled behind the door, and as much as you'd like to believe he didn't hear it, you did laugh.

***********************************************************

Spike had to have been a cat in a previous life, is what you decided when you found him still on your bed, nose in some magazine he found pretending to care about the newest Natasha Denona palette.

"That crypt must be uncomfortable as hell for you to still be here." You skated around your room to sink beside him. He reaches across his side to pull out a bottle of water and hands it to you.

"Your showers are hot as hell; I'm surprised you didn't pass out in there." He flips through the pages nonchalantly, pretending not to be incredibly fixated at the water dripping from the nape of your neck and disappearing into your shirt.

"You would've loved that, wouldn't you? Getting to play 'knight and shining armor' while I'm conveniently naked." The sound waxy pages being torn was a surprise. So much of you and his banter was contingent on the assumption that neither of you meant anything serious so nothing would become anything.

Spike, who spent most of his mortal adult life swallowing his feelings until his stomach became an endless chasm where his feelings went to fester rather than die, was more than okay with this unspoken arrangement. Sarcasm was a second language to you. You were used to your words not mattering, especially since in your group of friends, your existence seemed to matter far less than everyone else's. You wondered if that was why you and Spike got along so well.

He just got you. Maybe a side effect of him being around you whenever he could. He just got you. In a stupid way. In an annoying way. The kind of way that made you worried that reading minds was also one of his vampiric powers. He wormed his stupid way into your brain, slithering around in his own sort of Spike way til you didn't know where his influence began.

He did sort of have this hypnotic way of speech. Maybe because he was a poet. Poets have to have some sort of hypnotic power, right? Surely, there was some connection between rhythms and brain waves that made the effect of Spike's voice so persuasive. Maybe it's not the rhythm and it's just the honesty. Ironic, since the basis of your "relationship" was built on never assuming that the other meant what they said, but who cares. It gave you guys flavor. Something to keep things interesting.

"I'll have you know; I am a very old-fashioned guy with manners." You snorted as his response. He talked about his "old-fashioned" ways a lot. Maybe to convince you that he was a gentleman. Gentleman your ass, you'd seen what he kept in his crypt.

"My deepest apologies for assuming that a guy that used railroad spikes as a murder weapon of choice wouldn't be above jumping at the opportunity to see me naked."

"Am I that transparent?"

"When it comes to mirrors, yeah." His scoff was lost in the sound of a car horn going off across the street. Damn, you needed a new place. He had complained to you about the noise before. If you didn't leave near a busy street, he would try his luck spending the night far more than he already did. Each blare deepened the scowl on his face as he flinched at the sound, even louder from where he sat in front of it.

"Those death buggies have to be the worst thing to come out of the 20th century. So obnoxious, and for what?"

"I imagine they are more convenient than horse drawn carriages."

"Yeah, more convenient and not even half the charm." He turned his head to gaze out the window. "It's not even a nice car! I'd rather ride around in the fucking Angel Mobile than drive around in that thing."

"You are so dramatic. Usually I just," you swing your leg over his waist, straddling and reaching over to close the window. He swallowed hard at the feeling of your chest pressing against the magazine, the only boundary between him and you, and the nonchalance of the action. "Shut the window." You felt him tense beneath you, his right hand awkwardly meeting your hip, blue eyes staring up at you through dark eyelashes. "Then again, I'm not a pansy who needs complete silence to sleep."

He cleared his throat before he spoke. "I sleep in a cemetery, love, ain't much noise around those parts." His eyes wandered everywhere they could but the worst part about beautiful people is that there is no unsightly place to avert your gaze. He couldn't stare at your gorgeous eyes, or your stunning nose, or your lips to distract himself from the steadily growing boner that you were sitting right on top of. You were no better than he was.

Within the context of the unspoken agreement, this meant absolutely nothing. The boner was just a normal reaction, that didn't have to mean anything. The way he was looking at you was a bit hard to ignore, but that was the way he always looked at you. He was a lot closer right now, sure, but that stupid lovesick look that you have spent years trying to ignore, totally just a joke. Not real at all. A trick of the light, in fact. The hard-on was very real though.

After sitting there for a few seconds too long, you shift your weight to move back to your side of the bed, but his hands keep you in your place. " 'm cold", he mutters, his thumb rubbing circles between where your shorts meet your bare skin.

"Yeah?" You feel him pressing up against your core. "I didn't think you could get cold."

" Me either but-", you lowered yourself completely on his clothed dick and the groan he let out was salacious. "Here we are." The frigid way he moved made his lie believable. Incredibly cautious, hesitant. No idea what to do with himself. He ran his hands along your thighs, up and down your side, one cold hand sliding underneath your shirt, rubbing the hem of it between his pointer finger and his thumb.

You leaned forward, warm breath fanning against his nose. It smelled like mint. You smelled like some sort of cocoa butter. Smooth and soft on top of him and he didn't know if you were going to roll right off or melt into his skin. Your hands come to the sides of his face, and you stare intently at him. He felt like he was under a microscope with the way you looked at him like you were committing each detail of him to memory so that even when you closed his eyes, it was still him burning in the forefront of your mind.

"You gonna kiss me?" You whispered, pressing yourself further into him. He let out a breathy laugh.

"What, a guy's always gotta make the first move?" With that, you leaned down to give him what was meant to be a quick peck. A tester. A tease. But when you give Spike an inch, he takes a mile, and he took the opportunity to devour you. Mouth open, sloppy, wet kisses while his hands worked as eagerly as his tongue did. You were a calming presence, slow and sane as you grabbed fistfuls of his shirt to try and ground the both of you.

Breathing through your nose, you inhaled him. The faint smell of smoke, the fresh smell of whatever he washed the gel from his hair with, the distinctly Spike musk. Your thighs wrapped him more closely, subtly grinding into his lap, ignoring the slight burn on your knees from the friction between them and your sheets. His large hands covered swathes of skin, cooling you where you grew too hot from his touch. When he had his fill, he broke away from you, still nose to nose, a string of saliva still between the two of you.

"Do you wanna spend the night?" Your voice was somehow meek as if there was any way in hell he would say no to you. He breathed out, turning his head into the crook of your neck, leaving searing kisses on your silky skin, worshipping at his altar, and thanking who or whatever got him here tonight. He kisses you from your neck, along your jawline, to the corner of your lips.

"Yes", he whispers against your skin. He bucks his hips into you, the imprint of his cock and the rough material of his jeans kissing your pussy through the thin layers of material. You nearly choke on his tongue at the feeling. Fuck.

Your eyes are closed, hips moving furiously against his, too blissed out to even care about the steadily growing wet patch in your underwear. You're lost in kisses, kisses that overwhelm and confuse and steal your breath until you wonder how much you need to breathe anyway. Along with not needing to breathe, you learned they must have incredible resolve. He chases you. Not like how a wolf chases a lamb but how the sun chases the moon.

He pulls and you push for breath, some sort of reprieve, some time for your mind to catch up with your body because right now everything but the way the seams of his jeans catch your clit is one of the only things on your mind. He pulls you, still, his hands squeezing at your waist, moving up to cup your breasts, thumbing at your nipples, and flicking the already hard peaks. And you push, still, not in protest but in harmony. Your hips pressing down, his jerking up. Your hands tugging his hair, his squeezing your waist. It was good. It was so good.

"What is the point", he starts breathlessly, "of these damn shorts if they're so thin. You're leaking right through, love." He smiles against you, sharp teeth grazing against your cheek as he smirks.

"Take 'em off me then." For once in his life, he takes his time. The desperation of his prior movements forgotten as he looks at you as he trails a finger from your chest down between the valley of your breasts, to your navel. He draws invisible shapes along your stomach, diamonds, hearts, and letters spelling m-i-n-e. And he stalls there. Looking from beneath you, smug as you ground yourself onto his dick in an attempt to move him along.

He was amused. Fascinated. You in your own world, mewling, moaning, putting on a show just for him. Choosing to ignore how sticky your panties had gotten, how much they stuck to your cunt as you wiggled your hips as if you could get any closer. Your tits moving with you, the way your mouth was slightly agape, the way you keened when you rubbed against him just right. It was no motivation for him to move his hands at all, not when it was much more rewarding to angle his hips up and make you see stars. "You gonna cum like this?" He crooned, full of fake sympathy.

"You're really gonna make me get myself off." You rolled your eyes, maybe out of pleasure, maybe out of faux annoyance. Either way, his hand slithered to the waistband of your shorts and dipped even deeper. He left feather-light touches on your clit which sent jolts of electricity up your spine. Overcome with the tightening feeling in your belly, your hands grabbed at his shoulders as your hips worked and worked you snapped. Impossibly wet and dazed, you rocked into him until the high had passed and the stars had left from behind your eyelids leaving only Spike.

His fingers still, in your panties, he moves to slide them and your shorts off your body. You hover slightly, still too sensitive to rub your bare pussy against him. You fidget with the button of his jeans and zipper, Spike's hands coming to cover yours to ease the shakiness. Maybe to give the appearance that he was much calmer than he was. He was painfully hard, and you felt it when you palmed him through his boxers after getting his pants down enough. Where his tip sat was a wet spot. You smirked.

"Did I get your dick that wet?" A shiver went down his spine. The heat from your palm was felt through his boxers. Your hand was barely big enough to cover it. Before either of you was prepared for it, he flipped you on your back. His hands sat on either side of your head while yours removed him from his boxers. He was so big.

You tore your gaze away from his cock to meet his gaze. He still looked at you the same. Pupils widened from lust, cheeks with a slightly pink tinge, lips puffy, eyes looking down at you with the same look they always had. It's then he leans down to kiss you for the millionth time. No urgency, less messy, a kiss like he was trying to wake you from a thousand-year slumber.

Your hand still on his cock, you pumped it a few times, swiping your thumb against his tip to lubricate his dick. He groaned into your mouth, humming in pleasure. You try to line him up to sink in your hole, but he slaps you on the wrist. "Don't want your cunt tonight," he mumbled in between kisses, "Jus' let me feel you."

He pumped his cock a few times before slotting it in between the meat of your thighs. The veins and ridges of his dick would occasionally slide between your folds, but that wasn't the focus. No matter how much you wiggled for him to plant his cock so far deep it kissed your cervix, you were ignored as he squeezed your thighs together, panting as he fucked them.

The juxtaposition made your head dizzy. The softness with which he kissed you and the fervor of his dick between your thighs, them getting wetter with the accumulation of precum leaking from his dick. It only forced him to press harder, leaving handprints from how hard he gripped. "Such a pretty thing, aren't you." He sighed out, his pace still even but his breaths far from it. "Go ahead and touch that pretty cunt f' me."

As much as your brain wasn't working, it wasn't needed to do what you were told. Bleary-headed, your hand traveled from the outside of your leg to between your folds. Still wet from your previous orgasm, it didn't take much to just slip a couple fingers in, moaning as you did. One hand toyed with your tit as the other toyed with your clit, your hips wanting to buck into your hand had it not been for Spike's palm on your stomach.

Had he had the composure, he would have made some sarcastic comment. Slow down, love, what's the rush, is what he would've said had his thrusts not been as sloppy as they were. He pulled away from your lips to see the mess he was making. White beads pooled on the skin of your stomach, dripping down your thighs like liquid pearls. And you. Low warm light bouncing off your skin, lip tucked in your teeth, staring right up at him. It took all of him not to cum at the sight.

Not before you did, he decided, which by the way your moans pitched up wasn't that far away. Each "accidental" slide into you was met with a jerk of your hips. "Stop it", you squealed, the bucking of your hips screaming otherwise.

"Feels too good, doesn't it." Then he did it again. His large hand drifts around before grabbing your abandoned tit, groping it until you hit your limit again. Your chest heaved unevenly as you tried to catch your breath as Spike's hips sped up, stuttered, then stopped as his cum splashed on your stomach and breasts.

Spent and not knowing what to do, he kisses you again. He smiles into it, and to his surprise, you do too. Like it was the only thing that made sense to do. The fuzz gradually fades from your mind, the noise from the multiple fans running and the faint humming of electricity apparent again. There's a breeze coming in from your window and you giggle.

"Are you still cold?"

[tadhgsstuff]

Hear me out on Simon Ghost Riley getting stares from people, I mean that's normal for the man but even people he knows are shooting him a whistle and some are giggling at him, at the end of the day he checks a mirror to find a big red kiss mark on the forehead of his mask. Visible to all. Thoughts?

HEY so i love this and I just had to get a move on immediately because it just started to roam around my head at random intervals of the day .

Warnings: Suggestive if you squint, cursing

Prior to Simon going out to buy some groceries for the week he was at home with you, sitting on the couch, a casual sunday afternoon, you had both just finished the leftovers in the fridge. Cuddled up on the couch, the clock reading 6:00pm, the sun shining a golden light through the sheer curtains, you get up off the couch and walk to the room as Simon shouts

“Where ya off to?” from his comfortable spot in front of the TV

“Forgot I had a work dinner tonight! I have to leave in an hour! I should be home by 9 or 9:30” You yell down from the bathroom as you begin to brush out your hair.

You’re almost ready as you hear him get off the couch and slowly trudge up the stairs, his footsteps get closer and closer to the bathroom just as you finish slipping on your silky black dress, the one that clings to every curve of your body perfectly, the one thats elegant and simple, the one that drives Simon nuts.

He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you backwards despite your string of lighthearted pleas about how you just did your hair and how he’s gonna mess it up.

“Jus stay here tonight” he says as he rests his head in the nook of your neck before turning you to face him with ease, he sits the both of you down on the bed so you’re straddling him, your dress hiking up to your upper thighs, he drinks in the image of you before nipping at your neck, hearing your light giggles and scoffing at your faulty attempts to push him away.

“You know you wanna”

“Si’ you know good and well I have to go- and shit I have to go now” You say trying to get up, but he just pulls you closer, putting those big ass muscles to use

“Hey while I’m out and before the store closes, can you grab some milk and a carton of eggs? ran out this morning” You can almost hear his eyes roll, he was trying to seduce you into staying and you had to go all housewife on him.

“alright fine, gimme one more kiss babydoll.” He says grabbing at your ass attempting to lift your dress one more time, before you check your watch once more and quickly stand up, he grabs his mask and his keys and walks you out to your car, you pull him down by the collar of his shirt and plant a big fat kiss to his masked forehead. Watching him get into the car with a devilish smirk planted on your face, you start your car and drive off.

Simon walks into the grocery store, his big baggy cargos, chunky black combat boots, with scratches and a worn down look to them, his mask is covering the majority of his face, besides his eyes of course. He walks around without a care in the world, he’s used to getting stared at in public, he’s quite a large man, and his battle scars seem to draw loads of attention, but he’s getting more stares than usual, and more…snickers? He’s not too sure why people are giggling and whistling instead of covering their children’s eyes today he furrows his brows, checks out and gets in his truck, heading back to the house.

He puts everything away in the fridge and goes into the downstairs bathroom, low and behold he walks right past his mirror and slowly inches back only to see a bright red lipstick mark on his mask. He sucks his teeth and mumbles to himself before taking his phone out and sending you a text

“Think yer so funny huh sweet’art?”

He debates sending more but he refrains, he sets his mask out on the table and waits up for you on the couch, when you walk in the door and kick your shoes off, all he does is give you a sly look, watching your gaze switch from the mask to his face, his grin got bigger and bigger.

“anything you gotta say luvie?”

“did you get what I asked you to get from the market?” you say with a smile cracking at your lips

“yer just full of fuckin’ jokes tonight yeah” he says before picking you up by the legs and roughly kissing you ripping off that sexy black dress that he will now have to replace, but its worth it.

hope you guys enjoyed!! reblogs appreciated as well as sending in some ideas !! ❤️

(@cafekitsune for the dividers!)

[the-moon-files]

Wait, quick idea! Twilight looks like the only hylian in his village because everyone else has round ears, so what if he wasn’t as surprised as the others to see their human companion so resilient, but still fairly impressed because of the fact that most if not all people in his village don’t put themselves in as drastic situations as the reader? Or is this just humans from our world?

get out of my head lmao /lh - you, me, and wayfayrr are actually the same person on diff accounts LMAO

im of the belief that (blame @wayfayrr, my beloved) that he knows of humans bc of some in his village but yeah, just not the type of human in drastic situations

(ALSO they wrote me a fun, long, glorious, male reader human space orc au fic for winning their raffle a bit ago, and it brings up their headcanon abt this and i Adore It actually, check it out here pls if u wanna know🤲)

(also if u see this wayfayrr, sorry for the ping, also should i be calling u moss? or wayfayrr?? idk which, i hope thats even ok to ask 😭 i assumed u would call my ass Moon)

Moon: Male-Masc Reader (he/him)

Orbit: short headcanons-ish, rambling mostly

Stars: Twilight Princess Link (Twi/Twilight), mentions of other Links

Comets & Meteors: CWs: none known, & TWs: none known.

Please comment if I missed any. /gen

to reiterate what i said up there, in case u skipped it for the bullet points,

i like the headcanon he knows humans, knows some of their quirks, and how they were the first ppl the other hylian villagers called on to help stuck cows or downed wagons, lots of heavy lifting stuff

but he really hasnt seen the extent of real humans, bc the humans who were in Ordon, well, they lived in hylian society,

why would they need the adrenaline to lift a car when hylians have set up whole tools and systems in all their towns to help lift just a full bucket of water out of the well??

not to mention, i think all the humans in his village were older adults? like at least not the age theyd be doing things like parkour or going to any trampoline parks type of age,

id imagine its more like stories talked about amongst hylians how hard humans can go, and even the humans themselves talked abt things like,

“well compared to u hylians, we have stomachs made of molten lava to you guys really, but we never have to use it, bc u know hylian food works just fine”

when Twi asked they would say stuff like that, but as soon as he saw ur human ass just picking wildflowers and berries off the side of the road to snack on? even random grasses/vines at some point (kudzu)?? easily eating Wild’s Dubious Food that's DEFINITELY got monster parts in it???! gnawing on the bone of a cucco and it just breaks??!!! and you look surprised too, thank fuck finally a normal reaction from u- oh my goddesses u were just curious (damn the elders were right abt human curiosity too) **and are now sucking out the marrow and eating the bone-!!!!!!!!!!!!

Twilight’s perspective of you is actually the equivalent of like, reading stories about vampires all ur life, then this new friend you made starts to get allergic to garlic, crave blood, has crazy strength and advanced senses, etc

and he’s just watching those honest-to-Hylia human mythological feats play out in real time in front of him, like he’s the only self-aware character in the story that immediately clocks the really obvious vampire as a vampire lmao

is the first to either 1. start choking on his laugh as he theoretically knows ur about to jump on the back of a lynel/hinox to ride it around and watch as the others come to the same conclusion OR 2. try to Stop you from jumping on said big monster in an attempt to ride it around bc he gets used to ur human BS quicker than the others and can see it coming a mile away now lol

very much so this meme:

(ur welcome i made it myself <3)

anyway id love to rant abt this dynamic

abt both Twi’s shock at you eating peppers like a god has come down from the sky to prove their immortality,

but also poor rancher esstientally humansitting you too lmao

the Chain/Time/Wars absolutely put him down as the resident human expert like: “ok he just drank like, 5? No- Four stop him from drinking more at least- (dual sighs). okay, 6 stamina potions, will that kill him??”

Twilight, saviour of Hyrule, of the Twili, Link from Twilight Princess himself,

has to keep a record book of all the new shit he’s heard/learned about humans in Ordon, what he has actively learned abt ur ass just fucking around and finding out, and the few bread crumbs of information u give him abt ur species

(that rlly just come off as kind of cryptid statements abt u/humanity, or don't apply in this scenario bc ur only comparison is Earth Rules, which honestly scare every single fucking one of them in the same way as walking on Ganon’s lawn or something, like straight up view ur home planet as enemy territory, the Amazon jungle, the Hyrule wilds if you will-)

Twilight also gets involuntarily volunteered for human-sitting duty too

tbh the only person Not allowed on human-sitting duty, when u guys go new areas esp, is Wild/Hyrule

you’d tell him you wanna get inside the guardian robot to operate it and ride it around and he’d probably be in shock you even fathomed something like that, yet also now EXTREMELY intrigued to watch it play out

(they’re both more of a “u wanna jump off a cliff?? that's actually crazy, wait for me please.” he seems to think he can somehow protect you if he joins you? its worked sometimes to be fair to him ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯ just not really conveniently when the rest of the Chain are around lmao)

��

i live btw, ive been writing/updating fics along with life updates (moving states/new job/online class) so a few asks will hopefully be answered over here in the next 2ish weeks

no promises, my life is kinda girlbossing at the moment too close to the sun and i am Nervous abt disappointing u guys

i already feel like im disappointing my other blog bc i haven't posted in forever bc im writing a fic instead of asks during any free time i dedicate to writing for it so :/

pls excuse my super slowness like a package ur waiting for in the mail or smth type of slow

AGAIN thanks for the ask!! i hope this was at least entertaining to read as some addon to what u said, you guys have gotta check out some of wayfayrr’s stuff if ur into this, bc they're the only other place i can think of that's talked abt humans not just being the same as hylians

have a great week!!

Peace out hugs and chaos,

🌙

[anikaluv]

I'LL BE THERE —

❤︎︎ pairing:  Miles (e!42) × fem!reader

❤︎︎ genre: fluff

❤︎︎ cw:  stalking , Miles being a barbie kinnie, reader realizing there’s no escape lmao

❤︎︎ summary: Miles was your ex from a year ago, and you had completely moved on, blooming in your new life. So, why was he just now popping up everywhere?

❤︎︎ w/c: 800

❤︎︎ a/n: Was thinking about how Barbie has a million different jobs and went like, “What if that was Miles?”

E!42 MILES getting so frustrated in an argument you two were having; looked you dead in the eyes and spat, "If you don't like that shit, you can get up and leave."

E!42 MILES being genuinely shocked when that is precisely what you did, thinking this was just gonna be another one of the little squabbles you two were used to having

E!42 MILES realizing in the next following months that you could live perfectly without him and move on, while he, on the other hand, was going through the worst turmoil of his life

E!42 MILES deciding that whether or not you wanted him in your life, he needed you in his. So he was going to get you back no matter what

E!42 MILES turning around to greet you with a cheeky grin on his face at the cafe you’ve been a regular for the past 6 years as the barista going, “Hello precious, ¿Qué será para ti hoy? (What will it be for you today?)”

E!42 MILES ignoring your look of surprise as he jots down your usual order that he already has memorized and then has the audacity to look back into your eyes and ask, “Can I get a name for the order, please?”

E!42 MILES a few days later watching as you pull in your cart full of groceries to checkout and couldn't help but laugh mischievously when your jaw dropped when seeing that he was the cashier. (He made sure to scan your items very slowly)

E!42 MILES becoming the bus driver of the bus you took every day to work. Pulling up to your bus stop, opening the doors, tipping his hat, and greeting you with a playful smile. "Mornin', mi vida (my life), pretty day, ain't it?", ignoring your eye roll as you stepped onto the bus.

E!42 MILES who “coincidently” ditches the home gym he’s been using since he started being the prowler and starts going to the exact same gym as you, sucking in his breath when he sees you squat in those tight seamless shorts

E!42 MILES who’s happy to treat you and your niece to some ice-cream at the park inside of the ice cream truck he now works at, playfully chuckling at you as you arrogantly shoved the money into his chest.

E!42 MILES sitting comfortably in a salon chair at your normal nail salon as a nail tech, ready to paint whatever design you desire on your delicate fingers

E!42 MILES who types into his computer at your local bank as your bank teller, prepared to enter in your weekly / monthly checks when you walk in. Taking your check out of your hand to observe it, acting shocked like it’s not its about the same amount every time. “Woah, cariño (darlin’) , did’nt know my girl worked this hard.” (He was proud of you, he knew his girl could achieve anything she wanted on her own )

E!42 MILES who welcomes you openly to his salon chair at your favorite hair salon when your usual stylist “happens” to be out of town going, “Hey mami, you want the usual?”

E!42 MILES at your library organizing books loudly while you’re studying for a important exam, holding his finger at your lips when you’re about to explode and scream and whispers, “Baby, this is a quiet environment, quiet your lips f’me aight?”

E!42 MILES clocking in as your yoga instructor at your yoga studio only on the one day of the week you go, wearing a purple headband with a tight tank top and yoga pants that showed the ass you didn’t know he had. You groaning as he does doggy style shouts, “Thats it ladies! You want to really arch your back like this!” while smirking. (Kelly Clarkson’s “What doesn’t Kill You Makes You Stronger” is playing in the back)

E!42 MILES who works at your local mall at Nike on one knee in front of you happily assisting you put on one of the pairs of shoes, locking eyes with you the whole time wearing that smug grin he always got. (When he was finished you kicked him in the face before he got up, but lets be honest, he probably fell in love more)

E!42 MILES being on the plane you were taking to move and get away from him. Wearing his flight attendant uniform and slowly making his way down the aisles. Finally getting to you and turning to you as that cute scowl appears on your face while nonchalantly saying, “Would you like some pretzels, ma? They gluten-free.”

E!42 MILES chuckling loudly when you downright ask him why was he following you everywhere like a stalking creep, amused that you haven’t gotten the message yet

E!42 MILES picking up your chin to make you give him all of your attention, leaning down to where your lips brushed against each other, and spoke in a quiet tone no one else heard,

“Doesn’t matter where you go or what you do conejita (bunny), I’ll be there."

ENDING A/N:  Is this really extra and extremely unrealistic, damn right. But its funny.

TAGLIST: @janaeby @bellstwd @nmgstuff @axeoverblade @zaddyskye69 @agstuffsworld @spidrstar @laylasbunbunny @missusmorales @popeheywardssecretgf @lumineliax @fukingsad @wisteriaflowersss @crxss01 @joliety @fiannee @sylisan

TAGS:

[gamblersdoll]

cw: power play, boss on employee, blowjob, p in v. please dont say “this is not..” yes its fiction.

this had to be the busiest season of it, of all the year.

the business always boomed around june or july, production sales and having more accidents in the summer. see, when it got hot in the south, no one knew how to drive. the heat must be frying their brains.

but thats where your job came in, you making commissions exactly how you always did.

and you were the most important and wanted agent in your industry, town, and on the market. your skills were unmatched, making more commission because you were a smooth talker.

do you think that passed by your boss, Nanami? you were crazy to think that. he always saw how well you did.

“come to my office, asap.” the message said on your work phone. your bosses’ voice never sounds completely comforting or warm, sometimes stoic. and dare it be past five o’clock, because now he’s just a grump.

you knocked on his door, received a ‘come in.’ you open the door, peaking in through the small crack.

“i did say come in, close the door behind you, please.” he said, nodding in response when you do exactly that.

such a good listener.

“what did you need, sir?” you ask, fixing yourself ad you sat down with minimal effort. he turns back to you, handing a stack of papers. “whats this?”

“im offering a promotion.” he says, a small smile on his face at your excited reaction. “for what could be a small price to pay, just maybe.”

“anything, this is great!” you cheer, earning a small chuckle from him.

and you would do anything for this promotion. you were on your knees, hands on his clothed thick thighs. your scalp burned, nanami pulling your hair. he didn’t pull too hard, knowing you had an attachment to your hair.

your throat expanded when his cock plunged into the warm tunnel, eyes tearing up as you look up to him. your eyeliner became ruined, runny at that.

his groans vibrated around the room, feeling more comfortable since all the employees had basically clocked out and left around their usual end of day meetings. his hips instinctively thrusted into your throat, curling your toes so you didnt gag too much on him.

“get up.” he hushed, pulling you up and bending you over the desk. he roughly pulled your tight mini skirt. he should reprimand you, you were out of dress code. your skirt was too tight and your ass could fall out any minute.

oh well, he had his cock sunk deepen into you to even give a flying fuck about some dress code that was put in place in the fucking early two thousands.

“do you like this, lovely?” he said in your ear, hovering above you. he nodded, “yeah? you do, dont you?” when you mumbled your positive answer. he undid his tie, replacing his neck for your wrists. he tied it enough to not cut off circulation, yet to tug you back whenever he so pleased.

“how bad do you need this promotion, lovely?” he asked in your ear, forcing you to stand against him while he thrusted his cock inside your slippery walls.

“need it so bad..” you choke out, feeling nanami’s hand squeeze only a tad bit more.

“say ‘thank you, sir.’ for the promotion.” he egged on, hands going to your hips as he groaned louder, feeling himself get closer to that brink. he felt his balls tighten, rolling his eyes as his veins popped out of his neck.

“thank you sir!” you cry out, he was hitting that spot that made your legs shake and your thick thighs quiver. “take me, use me please! anything!” you moan, feeling him slam your body back down onto his desk as your cheek pressed up against it.

he breathes heavily, moaning louder as he pumps his cock into you for the last few times. he made a mental note that he had remembered to put the magnum on before he even decided to take your body for his own.

“dont move, i have some wipes that i can clean you with.” he assures, rummaging through his desks and finally wiping the sweat, spit, drool, and your own milky essence coming out of your folds.

“thank you, sir..” you mumble, looking over your shoulder and he hushes you softly.

“you deserve this, youre a hard worker. your efforts never go unnoticed.” he praises in his own way.

[ultra-raging-ghost]

Sending you this because your takes on cucuhalo are interesting/pos:

The scene where cucurucho hysterically laughs as sipi tries to break bad's armour is meant to be bunny but also.....Q!Bbh first instict when Sipi was reporting him was to call cucurucho. He's definitely attached to him.

But when fighting sipi while bad desperately screeched for cucurucho, whom was laughing his ass off... I just wonder what you felt about that

(I'm all for the Bad needs attatchements and Cucurucho needs control theory)

NO NO NO OK BECAUSE I WAS SO ILL ABOUT THAT I WAS SOOOOOOO

OKAY LISTEN TO ME

OKAHY i need to stop screaming ok listen i think that that was such a MOMENT

Cucurucho has obviously been SOOO jealous today and yesterday over bad hanging out with ollie, i have a feeling that thats why he let sipi do that and was gleefully laughing while it happened (I think he let it happen for a MULTITUDE of reasons, one being to let out that jealousy and once again hear bad screaming his name(hehe)(suggestive but also it reestablishes bad's dependence to cucurucho), another to cover his ass since ollie immediately clocked cucuruchos attachment when she heard theyre roommates, and another because hes an evil little shit who thinks thats funny. Lowkey also think he was into watching bad run around terrified but thats a different thing to talk about......). It was such an INTERESTING moment to me hehehe i had so many thoughts about it, at some point i put myself in cucuruchos shoes (and my shipper shoes) and felt immense satisfaction hearing bad call for cucurucho, calling for his protection, like that was THE reaction cucurucho was looking for and hearing it was just so perf

I also found it super interesting that, despite having two witnesses who would point out bad's lie, bad felt comfortable enough to lie to cucuruchos FACE about what happened!!!! Most islanders are NOT about that life but bads one of few who know cucurucho favors him in some way and thinks/knows he can use it to his advantage!!!! like ollie and Sipi were RIGHT THERE and both called out his lie but bad had absolutely no problem confidently turning around and crying to cucurucho about how sipi had been mean to him and how cucurucho needs to punish them!!!!! I was expecting him to tell cucurucho sipi was being a jerk or biased or something but like THAT??? CRAZY!!!! I think it woulda worked too if cucurucho hasnt been on his absolute JEALOUSY streak!!!

I found afterwards very telling too!!! Cucurucho obviously got the reaction he wanted from bad in that chase, bad was screaming for him, he wanted cucuruchos safety, cucuruchos protection, cucuruchos validation in his accusations and that goddamn bear obviously wanted that because you can see how protective and less jealous he was afterwards!!!

Like first off, bro basically kissed bad goodbye when he was walking out of that office lets get that one straight.....

But second off when bad went afk on that carousel????? PERF!!! you could tell he was trying to make himself sit there and watch bad get bit (trying to keep himself mad, iykyk) but eventually he caved, saved bad, and EVEN GUARDED HIM!!!! He got protective and jealous when ollie sat next to bad and i think ollie knew it too!! She laughed at him all cheeky when cucurucho got jealous and asked what she was doing, and when she laughed at the question he went, and i quote "no, answer the question, what are you doing?" and then proceeded to SHOOT AT HER UNTIL SHE GOT OFF THE CAROUSEL!!!!!! AND THEN KEPT SHOOTING AT HER!!!!!! CRAZY!!! CRAZY!!!! INSANE!!!!!

ANYWAY can you tell im so normal about them

[thecynthh]

smart ass - M.S pt 5

synopsis - matt’s not doing to well with his schooling but is determined to get his degree and pass his classes. one essay which is a huge part of their grade haunts him with a bad mark, luckily y/n is willing to help him

notes - NOT PROOF READ, lowercase intention smut near the end, aftercare cus thats what matt specializes in, cuddles

a/n - uhm idk if yalls could tell, or if u knew but i’m a virgin and have never kissed anyone so 🫣

leave some suggestions for chris or matt fics for me to write pls as well :3

——————————————————————————

——————————————————————————

present day a few days after their second study session

y/n pov

matt s 🐼

hey message me when ur leaving ur house. 8:46

btw we r ordering food to the house cus i dont wanna get gas. 8:47

text me what u want from CFA. 8:47

you

what in the flying fuck is CFA? 8:49

matt s 🐼

uhm hello? kid, how do u not know what CFA is???? 8:49

you

abbreviations like this is what's wrong with our generation… 8:50

matt s 🐼

kay ur so weird omfg. 5:50

CFA clearly means chick-fil-a smartass 🙄. 8:51

you

oh well then 😋. nuggets and waffle fries please 🛐🛐. 8:52

and sunjoy btww. 8:52

matt s 🐼

ew u like sunjoy? 8:53

you

u like rootbear don’t talk to me ✋. 8:52

and let me in pls im already outside :). 8:52

read at 8:52

i sling my bag over my shoulder and leave my car, waiting outside the large house with thrilling anticipation as i wait for matt to open the door. I see the fluff of his brown locks and a sweater similar to the one i’ve seen him wear before at school. i dont know why i get giddy when i see him, i dont know how we went to only speaking when madi was around too greeting each other whenever we see each other in the halls or cafe or even in our shared classes.

matt and his brothers were some of my closest friends now, after madi introduced me to them at a party, both of us got insanely drunk and made me call off crazy drinking ever since. all i remember from that night was the way matt took care of me while i was in a very vulnerable state and didn’t take advantage of me. i haven’t told anyone but madi about what happened to me when i was younger, and i’m glad she’s still taken her promise to heart, the only thing that telling her about my past shit did was make her and i closer.

i see matt in full view after he opens the door, “hey!” i say with a cheery expression despite how late it was for me.

“heyyy, thanks for coming by the way, even though you had a shift earlier.” he says sheepishly, before i left for work he messaged me begging to have another study session because he had more questions about the essay part of the exam. “oh hey lemme put your stuff in my room, just chill on the couch before the food gets here.” i pass him my backpack and laptop as he begins to walk down a hallway to make it to his room.

i move through the small entryway and become more apparent in his brothers view, “heyy y/n” nick says moving up to me for a hug, i take in his embrace.

“hi nick!!” i say excitedly. other than matt, ive hung out with nick a lot too, madi always has him over at her apartment, and even the three of us have made it a plan to meet up at our favourite bakery and talk for however long we want too a couple times a week. out of the little over a month i’ve know the triplets, nick has made a huge impact on me, and i felt safe around him, as well as chris and matt.

he lets go of me while i walk over to a slumped over chris on the couch, when he realised i was here he sits up on the edge of the couch. “sup chris,” i dap him up doing a little bro half hug with him.

“always nice to see you y/n,” he says as our arms unfold from the middle of us. i take a seat next to him with a comfortable amount of distance between us. matt returns not too long after i greet everyone. He sits down between chris and i and nick returns from the kitchen with a pepsi, root beer, bottled water and a lemonade, passing out everyone's drink knowing what each of us would ask for. matt and i give nick a thank you as he nods his head after.

nick stationed himself on the elongated part of the couch settling in with his fluffy blanket, he puts on a stranger thing episode and we all sit watching the tv. it only takes another five minutes of the episode for the doorbell to ring through the house. nick gets up immediately scurrying to the door with his fluffy blanket wrapped around him as he talks to the delivery man, thanking him and making small steps to see the rest of us. he comes back with two large bags of food planting them on the coffee table in front of all of us, before grabbing a tray of drinks after going back to the entrance.

“thank you for paying matty,” chris says, rubbing up again his brother with his lips pursed and now shoulder to shoulder with his older brother. i giggle at the sight, copying chris.

“mmmmh thanks mattyyyy” i say resting my head on the peak of his shoulder, pursing my lips as well and copying chris’ weird voice.

“you’re a fucking weirdo chris,” matt says in a disgusted voice flicking the other head that was very close to his face. “and you're welcome y/n.”

i laugh at chris’ overly dramatic reaction to what matt did to him. still giggling a bit at the sight of matt completely ignoring his brothers reaction, I say “just tell me how much i own you.”

“eh, don’t worry about it, it’s on me, plus save up for that new laptop you were talking about. i know how much you want it,” i blush slightly.

“aww thank you then,” i wrap my arms around him and squeeze him, he hands me the food that i asked for and retract back onto the couch.

“by the way, what time are we planning to stay up till? i told madi that i’ll tell her when i was heading home.” i saw looking at matt.

“well its kinda late so if you wanna stay in the guest room, im fine with that.” matt says, moving his head towards me, then breaking eye contact with the tv screen.

“im ay okay with that if you wanna stay over! plus you know your way around the house,” nick says giving his approval to matts idea of staying over.

“mhm im chill with it,” chris simply says.

“uhh yeah then, i'm down, thanks!”

we eat then say goodnight to nick and chris before we go to matt's room for some studying.

i lay down onto his bed as he walks over to his bathroom to change into some comfier clothes. while hes in there i start to think about our first study session when i found out matt had a crush on me. i thought it was very cute, but it made matt awkward on our last study night. i’m glad that he's eased up now, i just acted like i didn’t know anything and didn’t want to push on how he was feeling because I knew it would make his anxiety worse.

i come back to my senses seeing matt reappear from the bathroom door. we stayed on track for studying for an hour and a half before we eventually put on brooklyn 99 on in the background and talked.

“so, the retake is in a couple days, you think you’re ready?” i was hopeful he would be good by then because tonight felt very productive. I quizzed him on a couple of important ideas while he was playing with a baseball, throwing it up and down in the air. i learnt that he understands stuff better when he is doing something with his hands, it keeps him focused.

“hm, i’m not too sure, maybe another study sesh the day after tomorrow so by friday i’ll have all the stuff we went over fresh in my mind.” the baseball still gets thrown up and falls down in front of his face, with his hand waiting to catch it before it smacks him right on his nose. “thanks again for this,” i hear him catch it one more time before he moves his hand away from his face and looks at me just to the right of him. i'm hovering over him slightly, his eyes glow the brightest in the slight illumination from the lamp we always use when we study.

“yeah of course matt, you're my friend anyways.” our faces mirror each other, his eyes roam my faces while his hand holds the side of my face.

i toss my hair to the side of my head to lean down to kiss matt, he immediately returns the kiss enveloping my bottom lip with his. i moan into his mouth feeling him push me down and dominate me. one of his hands rests on my hip keeping me down as i pull him down with my legs letting him top me. most of his body is pressed down to mine, i lift my hips to give myself some kind of sensation i desperately crave for.

“fuck, i’m sorry are you okay with this?” matt says when he disconnects us.

i cup his chin bringing him a little closer, “i really fucking like you matt, please don’t stop.”

a smirk grows onto his face, “i really fucking like you too, you’re lucky i do.” he becomes more unserious pecking little kisses amoungst my face making a very loud “mwah” sound with each of he presses into my skin.

“matttt” i say through my sour looking face while he shows his affection.

“okay, okay, i’m done. but uh, how about we kiss again, didn’t get a good feel of it the first time.” he says with a knowing smirk on his face. i use my hand to weave through his brunette hair pulling him towards me again, we share a more passionate kiss, with knowing and love rather than lust.

it doesn’t take us long till things got more serious, his lips attach to my neck instantly sucking multiple hickeys into visible spots on my neck, moving down to my collar bone and eventually to the full and plump part of my boob. this is where my dream stopped last week, ive been trying to ignore it for the longest time but being in the moment now after thinking about it in my head makes it feel even more surreal.

his hand sneaks to the bottom of my fresh love shirt that i took from matt’s drawers when i found out i was sleeping here his fingers feel the hem of it. “is it alright if i take your shirt off?” he says with a quiet voice, almost afraid of what i’ll say.

i quickly nod in reply but that doesn’t seem good enough for him.

“words smart ass, i need words.” he says with a little bit of a condescending tone to his love tainted words.

“yes matt, you can take my shirt off too.” i say with a small giggle following after it.

he lifts the fabric to uncover the same white lace bra i was wearing while i slept over at his house by accident. “mh, i’ve been dreaming about this for a while ever since i saw you in it that morning,” he kisses the lace that travels to the small connecting piece of fabric between the two cups of my bra.

“and i know you heard what chris said to me that morning, yet you still acted like nothing was wrong.” he moves his hand to my upper back placing his hand onto my bra strap, “hey, can i take this off?”

“mhm,” my lips sealed trying to conceal my response to the amazing feeling of his hands on my body, he undoes the clip on my back with skill and purpose. the touch of his fingertips grant goosebumps to my skin in a very arousing manner.

he pulls the dainty clothing article off my arms and throws it to the floor benign absolutely amazed by my tits, they weren’t much but it seemed like matt was under a spell, he latched his lips just above my nipple to give me more hickeys, he sucks and soothes repeating this multiple times before he eventually dips down to my nipple, i feel the rush of arousal arching slightly off the bed.

i moan in response to the new sensation, i’m not exactly a virgin, but i haven’t done anything like this in a while, let alone at all for god sake. he massages the other boob, playing with the nipple with his hand the opposite of the one his mouth is very focused on.

he finally comes up for air after a little bit teasing, my thighs rub together and sits up to rip his shirt off to match my level of revealing skin, off goes his sweats as well leaving him in just his boxers, “matt, oh my god” i'm out of breath and very needy.

he continues a trail of kisses down to my clothes pussy, he looks up at me while holding the stretchy waistband of my pants, i give him a vigorous nod knowing what he was asking for.

he slides them completely off leaving me in just my underwear. he plants another sweet kids over my clothed heat which milks another desperate moan from me. “matt wait-“ he immediately comes up from my bottom half and lays beside me listening to me.

“hey we don’t have too if you don’t want too, i’m down if you just wanna go to bed in the other room, or even if you just wanna stay here and cuddle for the rest of the night.” he says before i can go ahead with what i was thinking.

“no, no i really want too it’s just, i haven’t really… done this before.” i tell him, he seems almost fully unaffected by my words.

“that’s fine, i’m here to make you feel good,” he places his hand nearing my core again, he rubs my panties over my clit moving down to feel the very apparent wet spot. “wow i’ve barely touched you and your so worked up,” his voice was sultry with a hint of a condescending tone.

“m-matt please” i struggle to say feeling the pressure he's putting down onto my throbbing clit.

“i’m gonna take these off now, okay?” he says with his fingers wrapped around the thin string of my thong that’s barely covers anything.

he slips them off admiring the sight in front of him, i almost get self conscious wanting to cover myself up with his blankets. his head dips and his hands pant onto my hips and one on my inner thigh. his tongue makes very sudden contact with my clit, he sucks and swirls his tongue around it, feeling the very heavy pressure i arch my back slighting leaning forward into his face.

his finger creeps and teases my hole before he fully plunged it into me. i heavy moan escapes my lips, “quiet now princess, can’t let nick or chris hear you.”

he continues his movements stimulating both my clit and hole at the same time, “more, please” i say with a pleading tone. he removes his finger from inside of me and replaces it with his tongue and mouth. he absolutely devoured my pussy giving me as much pleasure as he could, his mouth moving back to my clip and he slid his finger back into me moving it at a moderate pace.

i don’t try very hard to conceal my very loud moans, as soon as matt enters a second finger into my dripping cunt, i release with a pornographic moan, squeezing his head between my legs. “holy shit matt,” he licks up all of my hot cum and comes back up to kiss me.

“mmh you did so well for me, you ready for me now?” i say a needy yes while he goes back to sit back on the his headboard. he removes his boxers with such haste letting his cock spring out with a bead of pre-cum leaking out. “i wanna watch you ride me, you control the pace and how deep you wanna go.” he whispers into my ear.

he lifts me on top of him, kissing him passionately while i grind down onto his twitching cock. he lets out a guttered groan “okay, let’s do this cause i could bust just from looking at you.”

he lines himself up and holds my hips while i sink down onto him. his so thick and long, i feel him in ever existing crevasse in my cunt. “fuck yes” i say letting out a heavy breath.

“holy shit you’re so tight-“ he says between his monas and hard breathes. i begin to move myself up and down slowly, whatever pain that came at first quickly moved to pleasure as i speed up my movements.

my tits bounce every time i move up or down, my movements are set at a constant pace, “matt, i think- i think i’m gonna cum.” i say, feeling his dick twitch in my pussy again.

“come for me baby, give it to me,” he says, taking me by my love handles and moving me up and down a little faster. i came hearing his words letting out a couple of breathy moans, he follows soon after me. i feel his thick long ropes of cum fill me up and come back down dripping onto his cock.

matt does a couple of slower pumps in and out of me to ride both of us through our highs. he picks me up as if i weigh nothing and puts me down beside him laying down onto the bed.

he goes into the bathroom to retrieve a small cloth and comes back to wipe me down. he does a couple of strips to pick up as much extra cum he could. i feel him hit my clit and i whimper loudly, “oh god, i’m sorry, i know your still sensitive.” once he’s finished he goes into the bathroom and cleans himself up.

fishing his boxers from the ground he slides them on and grabs my underwear and a large t-shirt from his closet. he hops onto the bed putting on my underwear and pulling me up to put on the shirt.

“mh thank you,” i say tired and groggy.

he plants a kiss onto my forehead “anything for you smart ass.”

he comes under the covers and wraps his arms around me, intertwining our legs. we sleep peacefully until the morning

taglist - @westwiing @comet235

[shsl-fander]

Morning Workouts-Prinxiety

Tw: Working Out

Word Count: 762

Pairing: Roman/Virgil

Summary: Virgil catches roman right after a workout for the first time, unprepared for how flustered it makes him.

@spacedouterri

Roman huffed, his breath quickened, rapid gasps for air as he just kept his jog on the treadmill he'd summonded. His legs started to burn, a growing ache in his thighs as he gripped the sides of the treadmill as tight as he could. Sweat dripped down his face, and eventually his running started to slow as his breathing became heavier. His eyes quickly darted towards a nearby clock, he'd been exercising for about an hour and a half so far which seemed pretty good.

Roman panted,clicking the treadmill off before he collasped onto the floor dramatically, knees wobbling underneath him. "Oh my gosh peck, the things I do," he complains, though his dramatic sulking was interupted by his boyfriend walking into the room. Roman could feel the wet drops of sweat dribble from his forehead down the rest of his face, he puffs rubbing his forehead with a nearby towel. He then glances up at the noise of Virgil's entrance, "Oh! Greetings Snow Fright!" he grins, waving towards him.

Virgil stammered, words sticking to tip of his tounge, stuck in between his throat. He cleared his throat, frantically shaking his head trying to remain civil and keep his thoughts focussed, however his gaze couldn't fall from Roman. He couldn't stop staring at his boyfriend, and god he looked hot after a workout. Virgil's breath hitched, palms growing sweaty and blush darkening on his face. "Uh I uh- fuck," he groans, burrying his face into his hands. "Its like 8 am you can't do this to me yet it's too early to be gay."

Roman tilted his head, chuckling softly as he stretched, standing up to properly face Virgil. "I like when you're like this, it's cute," he purrs, wiping more sweat off himself. "And it is NEVER too early to be gay in my book! Plus I have to work out early in the morning if a prince wants to stay strong and healthy!" He argues in defense, flexing his muscles.

"See? Its working!"

Virgil's face just grew even redder, blush rising to the apples of his cheeks and spreading all over his face.  He shoved Roman, "Shut uppp," he whined, "You're purposely making it worse you royal pain in the ass."

Virgil forces a waterbottle into Roman's arms, eyes darting towards the floor.

"Drink this, dumbass. You look exhausted."

Roman flipped the cap off of the bottle, chugging as much as he could in one sip. "Thats because I am exhausted, emo," he comments, "Beauty is pain."

Virgil shook his head, "You're attractive enough with it Ro," he muttered, rolling his eyes. Virgil bit the inside of his cheek, gaze still on the floor.

Roman's eyes grew wide, a smile tugging on the corners of his lips. "What? Say that again, I didn't quite hear you?"

Virgil groaned, "You know you heard me, princey!"

Roman bat his eyelashes,"Is it so wrong to want to hear my boyfriend declare his undying love for me once again?" He tossed the bottle up into the air mindlessly, catching it in his empty hand. Roman laughed softly, "Whats up anyways, storm cloud? You usually aren't up early enough to see me post work out."

Virgil sighed, shrugging before burrying his hands in his pockets,"Couldn't really fall back asleep and thought you could use some water and food, " he admits,"theres uh- waffles in the kitchen with some orange juice if you want it, but It's not much so you don't have to, " he scratched the back of his neck awkwardly, chuckling under his breath.

Roman's eyes widened and his gaze softened, snaking an arm around Virgil before tugging him closer. He pressed a gentle kiss to Virgil's cheek, "mm thank you love," he mumbles, "Thats sweet. You really are going soft on me, emo."

Virgil rolled his eyes, "pfft as if, get a grip princey," he mutters in response, butterflies swirling around his stomach as he felt roman's breath against his face.

Roman slowly cuped Virgil's face, gently rubbing his thumb against Virgil's jaw. He closed the space between them with a tender, slow kiss. Virgil leaned closer, pressing his body against Roman's as his arms found their way to Ronan's hips. Virgil traced circles on Roman's skin, smiling against his lips. The kiss is nothing but light and gentle, as if the two had flopped onto a lovely cloud, blinded from the outside world.

"Cmon," Roman began as he pulled away, watching Virgil blink his eyes open once again. "Lets go get some breakfast."

[vriskabot]

davris morning routine hcs?

YOU CAUGHT ME OFF GUARD I WAS PLAYING MINECRAFT cracks my knuckles. this kinda turned into sleeping habit and self care hcs as a whole sorry not sorry -vriska is not a night owl or a morning person but she IS a long and heavy sleeper. do not wake her up before she is good and ready or you WILL get torn a new asshole bare minimum. if the verbal lashing does not work she will escalate immediately and directly to grievous bodily harm -dave is probably the only person who can manage this without dying but even THEN he would much rather get on her ass about going to sleep on time than get on her ass about getting up in the morning -dave is a much lighter sleeper and honestly naturally a nap guy. i think on a genetic level the strilondes dont sleep long even when they DO manage to sleep (dirk and rose are notorious insomniacs) but i dont think dave really minds it -nobody knows when he sleeps but he does! hes just Constantly Around -this was only further reinforced by living with bro and being trained and all that jazz so daves sort of got a built in alarm clock (lol time player) -in that vein dave can kinda predict when vriska is gonna be up based on what time shes gone to sleep so he can be in and out of the bathroom before she needs to be in there which is. a very very good thing -i think dave was a lot more anal (and anxious) about what he looked like when he was a teen (to the point of being unable to leave the house if his hair wasnt JUST right) but hes way more lax about it now -that being said i also dont think hes gone fully curly girl now that hes okay with his hair having a single iota of texture whatsoever. he just combs it into the style he wants it to dry in and lets nature take the wheel after that (its very soft and vriska LOVES to touch and tousle it) -he MAYBE uses a light pomade while wet if anything but thats only if he NEEDS his hair to stay nice all day -vriska on the other hand. woo buddy. -depending on how im feeling about her styling, shes either full 17 step curly hair routine or blowdried + straightened + hairsprayed until its crunchy even if her hair is naturally already straight -like im sorry shes SO emo -i think a lot of that stemmed from the sort of persona she put on to protect herself that ended up becoming her taste Anyway -the full face of makeup + done hair carries a very Intentional feeling that makes her seem a little less off the wall, has-no-clue-what-shes-doing than she really IS -ultimately its about control! having more control over the interpersonal dynamics and the flow of things based on the kind of assumptions people make about her based on the way she presents herself -dave was doing his similarly insane hair routine at 13 14 15 for the same exact reasons -dont let her fool you though its all smoke and mirrors -when she was in her teens it was definitely a full coverage foundation + powder foundation + pencil liner for EVERYTHING situation and loads of dark eyeshadow -in her adulthood though i think shed be alright with like. a much more lightweight base like bbcream or even just concealer in spots for daily wear and she saves the full face beat for more special occasions like dates and shit -as much as i think dave finds later on in life that he actually kinda enjoys cooking, hes not up making a Full Breakfast every day -theyre both perfectly fine with like. toast and microwave breakfast sausage to eat -vriska however is not to be trusted with the stove. she sucks SO bad at cooking save for the few dishes shes ruined enough times that shes got the experience to do it right -both of them are horrible caffeine fiends. they will drink soda or energy drinks with breakfast and then wonder why their fucking stomachs hurt later -i think in the case of NEEDING caffeine vriska is much more varied in her intake sources--energy drinks, soda, coffee, and tea are all viable options depending on how much energy she feels she needs -dave though... he feels like the "starts with an energy drink and only drinks other stuff when he has a craving" kinda guy

-though maybe thats the raging adhd you tell me -their bed is almost never ever made and both of them live in organized chaos. whether or not they ENJOY the chaos is a different story entirely -vriska is a blanket hog AND a pillow hog so they eventually had to settle on each having their own blankets -vriska loathes mint toothpaste and dave is a cinnamon toothpaste guy so you can imagine how much of a eureka moment vriska had the first time she spent the night -and yes that means she was just bearing with the mint because she had no clue there was any other option -uhhhhh i cant think of much else more on this topic i hope u enjoyed <3

[toaster-hair]

“There’s a human in the neighborhood!” chapter 3 part 2

this part puts the “sweat” in “the sweat chapter” teehee 

You finally made it to the train station, paying $20 bucks for your train ticket. As you sat down in your seat, you checked your phone. There was a new notification! Cool! It was from an unknown number. Not cool. You tapped the notification and read the text. 

Hello Neighbor. Sally Gave Me Your Number. Im Still Trying To Figure Out This Whole Texting Thing.

You chuckled, you could instantly tell who it was. But it was probably best to ask anyways. His texting style felt like one of an older person. 

wally? is that you? ur doing fine lol ( ´ ▽ ` )

Yes, Its Wally. How Are You Doing. I Saw You Run Out Of Howdys Place. What Happened. 

oh i was just late for my new job so i had to run to the train station. thats all.    (￣▽￣*)ゞ

Oh. Okay, I Thought Something Bad Happened. Tell Me About Your Job When You Get Home.

You sent a thumbs up emoji. You put your phone back into your backpocket. You watched the train stop and you got up. You searched up the place on your phone for directions and made your way to the city. You were so used to your colorful puppet world, that the regular world seemed off to you. Bleak and uncolorful. Harsh and judgemental. You just hoped the day would be over soon.

Finally, you stepped into your new job. It was a cute little boba shop! FishEgg Boba. You were introduced to your new coworkers, shown around the place, and started work.

Dinah was a happy-go-lucky girl with HUGE crazy hair. You couldn’t tell if it was a wig or not, you just knew she used a shit-ton of hairspray. Definitely a jersey chick. She worked at the cash register and was very chatty with customers. You guessed she was like, 5’6 or something.

Bayani was a shy older chubby woman, when you met her she barely spoke. She lit up when she started talking about her kids. One was in high school and the other was in middle school. She was working with the drinks themselves. You figured she was like, 6’5 or something given the fact she was a bit taller than you.

Casper was an odd one. He had these piercing eyes and an unchanging smile. He kind of just. Stared you down. He was friendly, of course, but he just felt a bit. Off. He definitely fit the “creepy janitor” trope. He was definitely the shortest of you all, only really clocking in at about 5’0. 

Your job was mostly just to help speed things up. Whether by making drinks with Bayani, or wiping the counter and sweeping the floor with Casper, or just covering for Dinah while she was taking a break. They really had you working your ass off.

“Oh, Y/N! Could you stir the boba for me?” Bayani asked you. Of course you ran over to stir the pot. “Y/N, could you help me get this stain out?” Casper asked you. Of course you tried to get the stain out of the floor as best you could. “Y/N, sweetie! I gotta go use the bathroom, could you watch the register while I’m in the back?” Dinah asked you. Of course you took customers orders until she got back. All this running around got you sweating! The sweat soaked into your clothes, making you smell nasty. You had to constantly wipe the sweat off your forehead with your arm.

Around the end of the day, you made a drink for yourself. You sipped it and scrolled on your phone. You then remembered Wally’s request. You opened your messages app and started typing.

It was gr8!! ヽ(>∀ <☆)ノ i  got   a  long with my new coworkers nicely!!!

You closed the app only to have to open it immediately after.

Thats Good. Im Glad.

ur quite the fast replyer lol 

I Was Waiting All Day To Hear From You.

Oh wow. That made you blush a little. Dinah looked over your shoulders. “Wow, Y/N, whose that?” she asked “Are they your pardner?” she teased. 

“Huh?! Oh, no no, he’s just my neighbor…” you stammered. The sweat on your forehead dripped down your face. 

“Woah, Y/N. Are you okay? Your face is all red and sweaty.” Bayani looked over concerned. 

“Huh? Oh, yeah I’m fine.” You reassured her “Just feel a bit worked out is all. Uh, we’re closing soon, right?” 

“Yep!” Dinah looked at her watch “Me and Casper will close the shop, you guys can go home.” you and Bayani thanked her as you headed out the door. Surprisingly, you both headed in the same direction! This made Bayani start up a conversation. “So, Y/N, do you live around here? Do you have any kids? Probably not, you’re pretty young. Do you have any pets?” she questioned.

“Oh, I live a couple of blocks away. I take the train over to my neighborhood. No kids, but one cat.” You answered her, playing around with your fingers. You smelt something odd, but it left your mind as soon as it entered.

“Are you sure you’re okay? You look like you’re going to pass out.” Gosh, she was so concerned. Did you… did you really look that bad? You hadn’t looked in the mirror since this morning. You certainly could feel your sweat soak your clothes, but that’s whatever.

“I”m fine, I swear. It’s just hot out is all.” You deflected her a bit. You did have a fever semi-recently, but you recovered from that, right? At some point you waved goodbye to her as you made your way over to the train station. You waited a bit, got on the train, and stared out the window as you made your way home. The sun was really beating down on you. Probably wasn’t a good idea to own so many sweaters, and even less of a good idea to wear one today. Your sweat made your sweater stick to your skin. The sun started to set when you got back to the neighborhood. The second you stepped back into town, Wally was there to greet you.

“Hello neighbor, how are- oh uh. Are you okay?” he asked before he could ask. Why was everyone saying that today?! “Yeah I’m just really sweaty is all.. Pretty hot out today haha.” you brushed off his concerns.

You both just stared at each other for a moment. Before you could fill the awkward silence, he did it for you, asking “What’s sweat?” before you could answer, he interjects again! Saying, “Wait, it’s not something gross like poop, is it?” the distress in his voice was clear.

You shook your hands “No, no! I mean, it can be gross, but not as gross as poop!” you tried your best to convince him “Basically when we- and I mean we as in humans, not we as in the both of us- get super hot, our bodies produce sweat to cool us down. It can make us smell bad sometimes, so we take showers! Speaking of showers, I should go take one right now. Oh, and feed my cat and stuff. I should probably do that first.”

He looked at you with those big pretty eyes of his with a glint of sadness. “Okay. Well, let’s talk more in the morning then, okay? Or over the phone. Either is fine.” you nodded “Yeah, we’ll talk later. Goodnight!” You walked to your house, Wally watching you as you slammed the door behind you. You instantly fell down to the floor once you entered the house. Your kitty cat running to you, meowing at you frantically. “Yeah, kitty, I know. Just let me lay down for a couple of minutes.”

(I FINALLY UPDATED BITCHES HOPE YOU LIKE BEING SWEATYY. Srry this took so long im more hyperfixated on atsv at the moment (esp hobie cuz hes a total hottie!!) i might write some fic for that but i didnt wanna just abandon this fic lol. Might draw what i picture Y/N and their coworkers to look like. Also, if it wasnt clear, y/ns coworkers were meant to be similar to poppy, julie, and wally!)

[narzissenkreuz-ordo]

im not gonna go into too much detail since its my business that doesnt need to aired out in the open

but this weekend was absolutely worst case scenario. i was no contact with my father for 3 years before he contacted us shortly after my mom's cancer surgery and because me and my sibling were both so vulnerable we decided to give it one last chance.

I made a mistaking thinking things would be different, he has his fair share of trauma and one of the first things he said to us on the phone a few months ago that no matter what he loves us and supports us with 'living our lives they way we want' and that was not the case at all

he brought his new wife and step daughter with him ( i realize now that he guilt tripped me into letting them come even when i said it should just be us) and i'm pretty sure they have NO idea about our baggage

he just acted like nothing had happened the past 3 years. we didnt have a conversation lasting more than a minute at a time. his new normal family didnt even talk to us or try to get to know us, i still dont even know what his wife's job is or his step daughter's college major is

they made me cry on the ferry to seattle yesterday, trying to convince me and brother to just get odd jobs or find work online rather than go through with disability benefits and at that point i just mentally clocked out. once we were out of the car in seattle i decided to stay at a near by cafe so they could go to tourist-y stuff (i do not do good in big crowds) and i just ended up ubering to the ferry terminal and went home on my own. And i have not talked to them since, he know i was upset and feeling sick and didn't even send me a text asking how he was doing. instead he dropped my sibling back home in the afternoon, didn't even take him out to eat, and then sent us pictures of the drinks he got at this local cider place that me and griffin were dying to try out. he was 20 minutes away and went out with his new family and took pictures to shows. i repeat. he was 20 minutes away from my house.

so i cut my losses and ended up writing a long ass letter last night. i wasnt mean, calling him a horrible person or calling him names. just how i felt so utterly unimportant to him and had no idea why he even reached out to us again, i told him i felt like he played a horrible cruel joke on me and brother

and thats that i guess. i was absolutely appalled by his step daughter and wife. I have never met such a group of entitled people before, the two of them are 1st gen ukrainian immigrants. They were absolutely disgusted that there were public needle disposal stations and pro-palestinian signage in the area. I cannot believe that they experienced the horror and pain of the current on-going conflict of their home on such a personal level yet roll their eyes at the current genocide happening in gaza. 'im glad the college protesting fad isn't popular on tiktok anymore' 'no one talks about ukraine anymore because of this' like. absolutely abhorrent.

so yippee i guess i have my final closure!!!!! theres no more second chances (this was like, the 10th chance at this point the past 20 years lol)

ok i realize i went into Too much detail but i feel better posting this thank god

[jones-friend]

BG3 is an all-timer

Since 2017 I’ve been making more of an effort to play more games. Two have always sat at the top for me: Legend of Zelda Breath of the Wild and Bloodborne. The first game to be added to these two since my Bloodborne fascination is Baldur’s Gate 3.

I’ll be sharing my thoughts and experiences on the game, spoilers will be below the cut.

Very few games conclude with me feeling like I’ve earned the adventure the game wants me to feel. Baldur’s Gate 3 is a whole ass adventure full of twists and turns, puzzles, combat, fantastic sound design, incredibly well written companions, a legendary soundtrack, and a full suite of antagonists to face off against. It is the widest game I’ve ever played with so many systems below the surface I stop seeing the inner workings of the clock and it appears to me as magic.

Baldur’s Gate 3 doesn’t do anything New per say, but what it does is incredible. Everything is bound together in story, everything becomes a piece of the whole and all of it works in concert in a way that enchants me unlike any game I’ve played before.

A playthru of Baldur’s Gate 3 is the hour equivalent of the entire Mass Effect trilogy.

We don’t get games like this often at all. They just don’t come around like this. If you have not played BG3 I cannot recommend it enough, it is incredible in every facet.

In my playthru of Baller’s Gate 3 I made Jones the pal-adin, oath of the ancients.

Dragonborn look so fucking good in this game. I romanced Karlach and was so taken by her personality that when we left to Avernus to fight together so she could live it brought me to tears.

All of the companions are top tier quality. All of them. I will say some have stronger storylines than others but all voice actors and writers are bringing their A games and I can recall incredible moments with all main six party members that endeared me to them:

Astarion: when I discovered his performative voice and his vulnerable voice and we held an entire intimate conversation in his vulnerable voice after all our companions went to sleep

Gale: when after all the game he approves of so many actions you take and is so quick to be your best friend/lover as you support him with his struggles with Mystra he triggers a Disapproves when you try to talk him out of ascending to godhood

Wyll: when after he declined to dance earlier in the game you catch him dancing about and he offers you to join, having a moonlit dance led by Wyll to an orchestra vers of the game’s main theme between just the two of you

Shadowheart: when I offered her to let her heart decide what was best with her parents and she chose to save them, shunning Shar’s teachings of Loss to excise Pain

Lae’zel: when after being saved from Orin in the Temple of Bhaal her demeanor shifted, using Faerûn customs to thank me and asking me “is something burdening you” whenever I talked to her in camp

Karlach: her anger over killing Gortash and how it fixes nothing for her, her pivot from I’ll never go back to Avernus to I want to live bc now she doesn’t have to go it alone 😭

What is incredible is the climax of each storyline of these characters hinges on your understanding of these characters and characters. If in 100hrs did you learn the people you travel with. And thats just the companions. Theres Halsin, Jaheira, and Minsc I was so entirely taken with. Then there’s NPC’s both allies and antagonists.

A lesson I learned from this game is make your antagonists HATE each other, this gives the players exploits that make the story thrilling. The antagonists in this game are incredible. Ketheric Thorm is my favorite of the chosen, when you ask him if he’s going to betray the other two chosen and he gives this resolved “Yes. Its going to happen. Everyone will die bc Myrkul is the only god who answered me. So I’ll be the best chosen he’s ever had”.

Orin and Gortash are excellent pinnacles of their deities and you’re given so many opportunities to interact with them beforehand letting you really get to know who you’re up against.

Raphael is also absolutely incredible. A devil in hell with the House of Hope who preys on the desperate offering contracts to be their savior while reaping all the benefits. Raphael, who watches your progress to let you get in over your head before striking with an incredibly juicy deal, and refusing to steal from him is an entire questline created from the player’s defiance and NOT from an NPC setting it up for you, AND his final fight has a disney villain song he sings. Holy shit is all the House of Hope stuff good.

But what really sets all the pieces of BG3 together is The Emperor. My roommate and I have had discussions for HOURS on his half truths and metered out information. When Ansur called me the Emperor’s thrall I FELT something. I felt played, betrayed by this character who reassured me they were my friend at all times bc I knew Ansur was RIGHT. I was being manipulated hardcore even if we had the same goals. This was NOT an even alliance. The emperor and his execution is one of the best characters I’ve ever seen in any video game.

And thats part of what BG3 does so well. Characters so rarely just spit out what they’re feeling. You have to listen and watch how they speak and interact with them as if they were a person. To me that’s the greatest triumph of BG3, I have to approach all the game’s characters like characters in a dnd session, like people. Its a really REALLY hard trick to pull.

Mechanically this game is a joy. The sound design is so chunky that all the actions and effects feel great to use. Respec’ing is easy and quick, and bc gear doesn’t upgrade you can respec and get back in the game instantly. It felt GOOD to deal 333 damage in the last round of combat with Huge Pal-adin Jones.

Btw, Elixir of the Colossus and the Growth effect on the giantslayer stack.

The fights are executed so well with multiple allies and enemies, casters in almost every combat, lots of uneven terrain and hazards, and not every combat is a “combat”. Many endgame scenarios caused me to sit back and say “oh? So we’re gonna cheat huh? I’ll show you cheating”.

Theres also bits I learned here I’ll be applying to dnd. The Blood of Lathander is a great example. Its a +3 weapon on a subpar weapon die, a +3 1d6 mace is just a more consistent +1 longsword. And its undead boons don’t do much if there’s no undead around. And its 6th lvl spell only gets cast once per long rest. Its a great weapon that makes the player feel overpowered against undead without breaking the game.

And thats just thoughts from running a custom character. I’m on Dark Urge and co op playthru and I love how the Durge playthru is just a cursed version of a custom character playthru.

I would be remiss to post my thoughts without mentioning The Bugs. This game has some major bugs that would have been a dealbreaker for me in a lesser game, but I’m willing to forgive BG3’s bugs bc of how much its trying to do. Some of them include:

Lae’zel T Posing on top of the altar she should be shackled to

The entire fireworks quest not working from guards always getting involved to fireball being thrown through two stories of wood floors and ceilings

The sound not working during the first final battle requiring a reload

Gale reprimanding me for taking a deal that had yet to be offered to me

Black boxes constantly flickering over Karlach’s campsite

There were more. And they did dampen my enjoyment of the later Act 3. However these are in the process of being fixed and with the game’s scale I’m willing to look past them. I will also say in its current state, 11/13/2023, the epilogue is far too short. Shadowheart didn’t even appear in mine. I’d at least like to know the fate of my main 6 party members, maybe more about the world after the ending. The ending is currently lacking for how well juiced the rest of the game is.

This is one of the best. Through and through. Its an experience thats left me changed, I truly feel I’ve gone on an adventure with my companions and we’ve gone through some intense trials and tribulations, faced down monsters and menaces, and played the big hero and saved the day. I cannot recommend the game enough, its a must play for anyone with capable hardware that can run it. Instead of a top two I now have a top three: Zelda Breath of the Wild, Bloodborne, and Baldur’s Gate 3.

[istherewifiinhell]

okay just gonna link a bunch of the es story boards videos (i started this with the mind of curation but ended up in a place of COLLECTION. whoops)

and ONE FUN BONUS at the end which u could just skip to the bottom for if (website popup voice) YOU DONT LIKE COOL ANIMATION. (joking lmao. this is for me interact however u like). The bonus is BOTH a fun fact and a fun vid.

i could not be any more clear at ALL TIMES. that i want ppl to watch es but lol either way. <3 story boards. (note also the rise turtles like swag (crossover staff) and see why i say this show looks so good cause u can tell their doing the 3d like its 2d)

notes: scratch track (the non VA audio in theses) so charming. yay u get to see them actually use purple rain. u can really clock mandroid flubbed a punch cause he DIDNT want to punch alex (inch resting) LOOK how extra expressive twitches alt mode is in 2d tho RIP. (crys about the little bird moment for the five hundredth time). Hashtag <3 fucking lmao.

this scene is one of those first DAMN thats crazy in the show i feel like and oh lol. would u look at that. DAMN THATS CRAZY.

AND THEN. this is the part with the meg move i love so much and the meg.op battle couple AND THE AND THE. (passes out) its sooooo cool.

notes: deleted scene, explains WHY shock wave got out during the megs field trip ep. gayass. CUTE KITTY. #3 son mug. this shits literally just so funny. she/her rav pronoun drop fjgbdfjg.

notes: altered version from the final ep they moved night shade around. they all have their final mode colours in the boards aw lol. ALSO. little like. adopted kids moment that i doooo get why they cut but u ALSO GET how it would emotional payoff in the ep with NS protecting their parents Oughhh (rolls on the ground)

notes: JUST A LITTLE MORE emotional oumph to the megs flash back but not that different. hes handsome tho i like to see him. like the scratch tracks impression of shock wave its cute. i can hear the vocal quality their going for.

oh hey also GAY CARS. i just found these/am seeing them first time today

Neat!

NOT THE SAD SHIP VIDEO VIBES.... OH GOD OH GOD... NOT THE SAD ASS PIANO MUSIC..... WHAT THE HELL. THIS IS DEVASTATING. watching bd tanking those shots for bee and crumbling APART. awesome. what the fuck. HELLO.

finale stuff

kids fighting oppie at the train yard. just COOL

fight on the bridge. ALSO COOL.

BIG finale scene stuff in 3 diff parts

scary shit and visuals that FUCK

THE MEGS ANGST. im KILLS ME that it didnt get a way in there. tho would have killed me to see also. no really tho this shit is so visually insane god damn. seeing this DID also help me understand how the screamer save happened better. EVIL SPIDER MAN. also in the group that comes saves em. was not in the final ep but we must pray hes still safe maybe just doing smth else.... (hes with swin and his bro busting in. the brother is the car. lol). twitch doing megs move!!! (propelling herself with her canon). mandroid going full fucking beast mode.... etc.

urghh u can really vibe out how bad those injuries are. and emotionally. bwah.. and. THIS SHOW. god. okay.

okay this one isnt the bonus but ill give it anyway

song from the tf the movie and also my alarm for several months (yes it HAS stopped working thanks for asking) BWAH. my loves. (weeping gently)

OKAY HERE IS THE FUN BONUS VIDEO

REALLY funny really goofy really fucking delightful. the mean girl trio seekers energy is supreme. god i love gay ppl. anyway. hey. doesnt that screamer look.... familiar...... WHY YES. YOU MAY NOTE THE YOUTUBE CHANNEL... SAME PERSON. THEY GOT A FUCKING JOB. ON THE SHOW. (unsure if its causally related) THATS SO FUCKING CRAZY the world is wonderful. es seeker trio THE mean girls seeker trio of all time. even if their barely in it. cause like. wow. (gets stuck in my loop of watching this forever and ever again) BWAH

[asm5129]

RWBY V9 E6 thoughts and analysis

Jaune, my poor boy

here he is having had to just kill a friend

Then he has the WORST luck and stumbles onto this weird-ass tree

(Love the clock tree’s design btw)

And then he picks the “time lime” (as a friend called it) and it sends him back decades, we don’t even know how much

And since he fell last, no one knows he fell at all

Meaning he has to wait even longer

In better news, love that Jaune sees Crescent Rose and immediately goes to save it when he’s falling

He knows how important it is to Ruby

(Or was. We’ll get there.)

We now have explicit time shenaniganery in the Ever After, and I doubt it’s our last

Poor Jaune though my god

What must he have gone through

GROUP HUG AWWWW

Weiss “if I knew he’d be this hot I’d have stuck it out” Schnee

“What good is saving anybody if Salem just destroys the world anyway”

I love how RWBY does this. This is a line that, on the surface, makes perfect sense. But it’s not the logic that’s flawed—it’s the mindset behind it.

Every moment of life is valuable. Every single one. (Link at the end to an amazing video essay on this using the lens of Life Is Strange).

Think about it. Otherwise, the fact that we’re not immortal would make our lives instantly meaningless, and that’s just not true.

On top of that, you could save the world, but if everyone (or nearly everyone) in the world is dead, that’s not really rational either

Like Yang says, the idea that saving individual lives doesn’t actually matter in the grand scheme of things is the path that led Ironwood to become a villain.

VILLAGE? Jaune has a village?! Who might we meet there? I’m intrigued

Jaune….why are you giving me Ironwood vibes? 😳

CC genuinely seems to be glad to see Jaune

The tree is what causes ascension!? What a twist

CC, you say that can’t happen to them, but you were also awfully worried that team RWBY wouldn’t be who themselves anymore after visiting Herb

Clearly you thought SOMETHING could happen

But…you were also worried something could happen….and actively tried to prevent it….So what’s going on here?

Ah, so THATS who the boy in the back of Alyx’s photo in the intro is

“You never asked, silly”

Thing is, I think CC is being sincere. I don’t think they were hiding it, they genuinely just don’t answer questions that aren’t asked. It’s just not part of the social contract from their perspective

A Punderstorm?

Also just realized

Jaune must have been actively fighting against the Ever Afters attempts to resolve his issues the entire time

Probably because of his trust issues which have only gotten worse over time it seems

Also first impressions of the Ever After being what they were for him probably didn’t help

But wow yeah

He must have been actively resisting healing from his pain for a ridiculously long time

Poor Jaune

Ah poor Weiss, she and the Ever After do NOT get along

“Something bigger to work out” eh?

“How do we take the next step” BEES

What do the symbols on these signs mean? Boy and paw?

SUMMER IN RUBYS REFLECTION

Oh my, it’s literally visualized in front of them but Ruby does not even notice her own trauma (Summer) yet ruminates on the trauma of others and her inability to fix things for them (Weiss and Atlas)

I do not trust Jaune’s story here, at least not completely. I don’t think he’s lying, but it’s very much filtered through a biased lens of trauma and trust issues

“She wasn’t just a little petulant. She was selfish, and cruel.” She also looks about thirteen

“Like the whole world was make-believe and the rules didn’t apply to her” MAYBE SHE THOUGHT IT WAS MAKE BELIEVE 🤯

We don’t know how she got to the Ever After, but it’s quite possible she genuinely didn’t think of it as “real”, which meant she didn’t have to feel bad about any of her actions

Just like how Alice in Disney’s adaptation (the animated one) didn’t really have to contend with her collateral damage since it was all a dream

What changed at the Herbalist, Alyx? What did Herb say to you?

“The more I tried to get the story back on track the more she distrusted me”

Honestly? That one I think is a little valid. You were trying to force a child’s life to fit a narrative you believed it was supposed to fit. If, say, she found out something along those lines, yeah of course she wouldn’t trust you Jaune.

Honestly, the more interesting thing for me is that she apparently lost all trust in Lewis as well.

“I couldn’t even be the make-believe hero”

Poor Jaune. For all the growth he had, there was still that part of him that saw himself as ultimately just “the lovable idiot stuck in the tree while his friends risk their lives” and he hates himself for that

For not being the hero he thought he should be.

Wait…Holy shit

In the Ever After, he was kinda stuck in a tree

Though not in it’s branches this time, he was stuck in its grasp nonetheless

“The Rusted Knight drank the poison in her stead” this is such a strange line

That’s gotta be intentional. Why does he refer to himself in third person as “the rusted knight”? What does he mean “in her stead”?!

It does obviously seem that the poison wasn’t lethal. So that’s another intriguing thing about Alyx. Jaune states that she said she “wasn’t going to let anyone stop her from leaving. She’d do whatever it takes”

And yet, she seemingly made sure not to kill him

“The cats role in the ever after…I figured it out later, when the cat came back for me once Alyx left” Okay so, I’ll admit there’s at least a chance it was lethal and the Cat saved Jaune somehow

But I think it’s more likely it wasn’t lethal, because the flashback had Jaune basically just falling unconscious to the best of what we can see. Of course, that doesn’t mean the Cat didn’t help him recover a bit….who can say, all I’m saying is it’s interesting the cat came back for Jaune.

Then again, maybe CC just genuinely didn’t understand there might be conflict between them now

Yeah so, lots of people have pointed this out, but this is where it becomes clear how biased Jaune is. The Cat took Alyx and Lewis to the tree, one of them got home—the assumption is it was Alyx since she supposedly wrote the book (many have pointed out it’s quite possible Lewis is the one who made it back, which is why Alyx is presented much more sympathetically in the story) and this is where all of Jaune’s issues finished the story for him.

He began to believe that the Cat was never helping anyone, that they were only ever manipulating them in order to feed the tree and keep the cycle going, and this is a clear indication of how his trust issues are affecting his ability to see things clearly

BZZZZZZZZZZZ ITS BEEEEEEEEES TIIIIIME BABYYYYYY

“I’ll feel a lot better when we’re together on that platform”

Just LOVE that Blake has been taking the lead this whole volume

She is ready to love and be loved

She knows who she is, she knows what she wants

And she’s done letting the memory of Adam or the threat of Salem or anything else stand in her way

“You’ve got a really good brain”

“You have cat ears!”

Yang flirting with Blake in volume 1 when they first met CONFIRMED

Also confirmed is that Yang’s inability to flirt with Blake is tied directly to her struggle with vulnerability

She’s scared to say what she means when it matters

THE MUSIC

YANG’S ADORABLE LITTLE “Shall we dance” ANIMATION

THE TEARS IN HER EYES

“I think you’re an extraordinary person. You’re always the first to lighten a situation. You act bravely when you’re afraid. You do what you say.

Try to keep up!”

“I like that you’ve never been intimidated by me….even when you didn’t like me very much.”

“I was a little weary of people in general…”

“But you never gave up on them, even when they hurt you. You never give up. You know what matters to you.”

This whole exchange is so beautiful

And I love that despite Yang’s comedy often acting as a defense mechanism and Blake’s unwillingness to give up on people causing her to stay with Adam, both are presented as something worth loving because that’s not all they are

Yang makes Blake smile. Sometimes it’s a defense mechanism, sometimes it’s not, but Blake loves that Yang makes her smile

And Blake’s refusal to give up on people was taken advantage of by Adam, but it in and of itself is hardly a bad instinct—and Yang saw that firsthand when Blake dedicated herself to making sure her team (and Yang especially) knew she was never going to run away from them again

And of course, that’s only the tiniest piece of why they love each other.

“You do what you say”

After all Adam’s manipulation, gaslighting and abuse, to have someone who says what she means and actually acts like it must be incredible

“You know what you want”

Yang’s always been a bit adrift, defining herself by her relationship to others. In v1 she mainly saw herself as Ruby’s older sister and parental figure; and she also defined herself by being abandoned by Raven and wanting to find her. It’s not that she never had wants of her own, but she her wants often depended on how she viewed herself in relation to others.

Blake took no shit, she was passionate, she took a stand when it was something she believed in—and maybe even inspired Yang to do the same in volume 8?

“Let’s make this quicker. Any big truths we haven’t dropped on each other yet?”

As soon as Yang says that, she knows the truth she has to say and the storm reacts and

THE COLORS

THE PURPLE AND YELLOW

ITS SO PRETTY

Everything in this scene is SO PRETTY

“It’s like…a cliff. And if I do it I’m just going to….fall.”

“I think we’re already falling…”

RWBY has played around a LOT with the idea of “falling”

Cinder Fall/the fall maiden and falling into the abyss after her fight with Raven

The fall of beacon

The intro to volume 3

Ironwood’s fall into villainy

Falling into the ever after

So much more

Hell, initiation literally launched them into the air and they had to learn how to develop a landing strategy as they fell!!! Fuck this show is so well-written

But here, Blake takes the idea of “falling”—presented as something dangerous by Yang—and reframes it into something explicitly positive for the first time

The big deep breath Yang takes…Blake is literally telling her she already knows, but poor Yang is still afraid she might not be loved back

But Blake doesn’t even let her finish before making sure she knows it’s real

I learned that apparently Lillies are the official lesbian flower so that’s just a wonderful detail

I love that this kiss isn’t rough and passionate like they’ve been waiting to get their hands on each other

It’s gentle and calm

Tender, and compassionate

And while it’s not verbalized, you can actually see them checking for the others consent!!!!

So CC definitely has been explicitly hiding SOME stuff

Like that they didn’t know Alyx wrote a book about her adventure

When CC implies Jaune isn’t particularly stable, his reflection becomes his younger self. Intriguing.

CC wanted to go to remnant? But Alyx didn’t take them. Intriguing. Also “through the door to remnant”?

And yeah, ultimately, team RWBY did not care about CC. They were using them. Despite everything they did for our heroes, they only saw CC as a guide and an annoyance to endure so they could get home

Blake’s leg is doing the thing and it’s adorable

“Feels like I’ve been waiting forever for that” WE ALL HAVE JAUNE THOUGH NOT AS LONG AS YOU BUT SEMANTICS IT WAS SO WORTH IT

Crescent Rose. Jaune found it.

And Ruby is straight-up disassociating poor girl

When she crafted Crescent Rose, she crafted Ruby Rose as well. And she doesn’t want to be Ruby Rose, so she rejects Ruby Rose’s weapon.

And tomorrow, my guess is we’ll get a return to the Blacksmith, and maybe some Summer/Salem info too.

That video essay I mentioned on why every moment of life matters (the thumbnail is a bit clickbaity, promise the video is exceptional)

And a fantastic breakdown of the Bumbleby Confession scene:

[not-alien-girl-v]

hi love ur work!!! could u write an eddie munson x reader where reader tells him she’s pregnant and he kills himself in the upside down instead of being a parent. also could y/n be secretly vecna? thanks 🤩🤩

I'm on my way to tell my boyfriend, eddie munson, that i'm pregnant. i'm so scared he will be upset, but i know he loves me, and deep down i know that he would never hate me for anything. i'm just so scared for such a big change. a baby is a huge responsibility! i hope we can make it through this endeavor!

i knock on his door.

'KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK'

he opens it and i see him, wearing his iconic hellfire t-shirt and jean jacket, hair a frizzy mess, but that was my man! i lunge forward and trap him in a hug, pee stick in hand.

"why are you so happy? especially when vecna is going around killing everyone!" eddie warns me. little does he know... hehehe.

i show him the pregnancy test in my hand. he jumps back. "EW DON'T TOUCH ME WITH IT!" he exclaims as he wipes the peepee off of his clothes.

"sorry! i'm just so happy! we're gonna have a baby!" i smile big at him but he doesn't smile back. what's wrong, i wonder.

"i-is it mine?" he asks me like a dumbass.

"of course it's yours! i'm not a slut, munson!" i poke fun at him. he still doesn't smile back.

suddenly, over a walkie talkie, a frantic voice starts talking. i think it's dustin, his weird little friend. he's already basically a father figure to those young boys in his dnd club. i don't get why he isn't happier to be a real dad!

"listen... y/n... you should probably go... don't call me... don't come by my house... we're done"

"EDDIE NOOOOOO!" i scream but it is too late. he kicks me out of his trailer, and i land hard on my ass on the cold, hard, ground.

i'm so fucked!

___

on the boat at lover's lake, above the entrance to the upside down

"so, how are things between you and y/n, eddie?" steve asks him, looking wearily down at the glowing portal below. no one knows where exactly it could magically transport them.

"she told me she was pregnant, so i dumped her ass!" steve high fives him at this.

"nice one man!" steve is happy at this.

"shut up you two! we have to jump down there to the portal! we have no idea what might happen to us, though! what are we going to do?" nancy worries like the worrying bitch she is.

"i'll go first" eddie volunteers.

"eddie no! it coul dbe dangerous!!!" robin warns like the hot bitch she is.

"girl. danger is literally my middle name!" eddie tells her sexily then jumps off the boat into the unknown. they all follow soon, hoping eddie doesn't lead them to certain death.

___

as sooon as eddie wakes up, he is face to face with y/n, his pregnant ex-girlfriend. "w-what?"

"hi eddie" she says

"this can't be real!" he says but looks around and sees the rest of the gang down there with him.

"you bet your ass it is! if you don't want to be a father, then all your friends will have to die! also blarg!! i'm vecna! i'm actually evil and stuff and you r baby will be half vecna half munson!"

"noooooooo!" eddie curses the heavens above for his terrible fate. "it's a good thing i always carry around a rope!"

eddie takes out his pocket-rope and walks to a vecna tree, which is like a regular tree but it's in vecnas house and thats scary!

he ties a noose with the rope, and gets up on a chair.

"omg eddie nooooooooo!" steve cries but it is too late, eddie has tied the rope around his neck and jumped off.

he is now dead!

"noo! how will i ever raise my baby now!"

"omg girl he's dead..." robin whispers to nancy and nancy agrees bevcause its true.

"now you all have to go! prepare to die, teens!" y/n/vecna says in her vecna voice and she does the clock thing and then robin and nancy and steve all die from the vecna curse of whatever scares them or something.

"haha!" y/n/vecna exclaims in victory!