#<- i have never used that word in my life. he's changing me

[bratbarzal]

for ur valentines blurb pretty please these prompts with quinn hughes ☺️😘

¹⁾ “you really planned this?! remind me how you’re single, again?”

⁴⁾ “c’mon, like i need an excuse to spend time with you.”

⁵⁾ “i can’t help but think that this is a little more effort than someone would normally put in for their friend.”

✩‧₊˚ bratbarzal's valentines event!˚₊‧✩

idk why I give prompts and then continue to go off script but I honestly think I have a problem with being told what to do lmao. something about scripted sentence cuts a creative wire in my brain. THE SENTIMENT OF WHAT I WROTE IS THE SAME!!!!! I promise. also I like this one lmao!! I hope you like it too thanks for requesting!! and stacking the prompts is very cool gave me a nice little story to follow I love it!!! I wrote this whole thing and realised I didn't mention valentines once, but it's belated, so..... we're going to pretend it's okay I've decided on your behalf thanks love you

this ended up at 3.4k words lol - warnings for fade to black type smut, slightly angsty

Quinn: you coming over tonight?

A text from him has never filled you with anxiety like this.

But then again, for as long as the two of you have been friends, you've never actively avoided Quinn until now.

Monday had been one word answers, Tuesday had been emojis, Wednesday had been reactions, and Thursday had been radio silence, because he hadn't texted you, anyway.

It's not that you're mad at him. You wish you could be mad - wish you had any reason other than your own shame to be turning down all attempts at contact. But instead, all you can think when you see his name is how much you had fucked everything up the last time you saw him.

You: idk

And only because you feel instantly bad about how short that is, you immediately follow up with:

You: work has kicked my ass this week

You see the little dots keep popping up, and you're only torturing yourself to watch them come and go as he figures out what to say - how to salvage what you'd so carelessly made a gigantic mess of only last weekend.

You should really just say yes, you think - be the bigger person. Fridays have been your thing, all season. The day of the week he most frequently has the night off, and an end to your usually-hectic work-week, it has just made sense for the two of you to hang out, to make a routine of doing so.

Bailing on him is harsh, you know that. And with such a weak excuse too - you've had much worse times in your job, and it's never come between the two of you before.

And you know that he knows what you're doing. It's obvious. It's just whether he's in any mood to try and recover whatever scraps of your friendship still remain. Whether he even cares, anymore.

Quinn: please?

The two minutes it took for him to type just one word dragged longer than they ever have in your life, and you blink at your phone screen as you see the dots jump up again.

You chew nervously at your lip and wait, tapping your foot against the side of your desk and watching this time as it stays.

Quinn: I've already bought enough to cook for us both

He's such a guilt tripper.

You sigh, typing back and sending an immediate response, figuring a week of the bare minimum is punishment enough without blanking him or making him wait.

You: okay

A heart pops up below your message almost immediately, the reaction only worsening your anxiety at the thought of how hard keeping your distance is.

You: I'm finishing later than usual, should be there around 8

Quinn: ok I'll have dinner ready for then!

--

You knock on Quinn's door a little after 8pm - still in your work clothes, although that is usually how you come over, in your defence. Quinn loans you something comfy, and you usually change, but changing means staying over, and you're kind of trying to avoid all that again.

So when he welcomes you in, you awkwardly pat at his back as he tries to embrace you, before hovering around the kitchen instead of making your way back to his room.

He frowns a little as he watches you - he's in a hoodie and sweats, settled in now for the night with no intentions of getting back up once the two of you have eventually sunk down into the couch together - and waits a second to see if you're just on a delay, if you're just beat from work, like you said.

"I left a change of clothes for you on my bed," he says once he realises you aren't shifting, glancing quickly at you before he starts to busy himself with dishing up dinner.

"I'm good," you tell him, short, with a tight lipped smile sent his way when his eyes meet yours, narrowed in curiosity.

You're wearing a skirt and heels, for Christ's sake, and a blouse that's a little too restrictive around your shoulders. You've been in them all day, too. Of course you aren't good, and of course he knows that, but he drops it, a resigned nod and an awkward shift of his gaze back to the task at hand, spooning an assortment of green vegetables beside the rice on your plate.

You chance a good look at him while he's distracted - his hair soft, pushed back messily in a way that makes it flop straight back into place, and he looks a little tired, but he's had a long week, too. Back in training, pushing himself, dealing with a best friend who isn't reciprocating his energy. He's probably exhausted.

His jaw is clenched as he finishes the meal off, clattering utensils a little louder the longer you're quiet, and letting out heavy sighs when he's clearly growing more frustrated with how little you're giving back.

"How was work?" he tries, reaching into the draw and retrieving a knife and fork for the two of you.

"Long," you sigh, offering a small smile when he looks over to let him know that this particular instance of a short response isn't personal. You are genuinely exhausted - you'd worked an extra long day, just to get a major project finished, and, if you're honest, you're just ready for bed. "Glad it's the weekend, I'm probably gonna hit my pillow tonight and not see tomorrow."

The initial spark that lit up in his eyes when you started speaking a full sentence to him dulled immediately when he realised that you had all intentions of going home.

"You're not staying over?"

"I can hardly sleep here until Sunday, Quinn, that would be insane." Like you haven't spent consecutive days around his apartment, before. Like you haven't spent weeks with him back at his lake house in Michigan in the summer. Like the two of you didn't isolate together when you both got covid, probably from each other.

He nods, brief and sharp, jaw tensing again as he mutters out a bitter, "Right."

God, this is hard.

"Do you want me to carry anything?" You ask, trying to be helpful, just to make yourself feel better.

He wordlessly hands over the cutlery before turning to grab both plates on his own, nodding for you to make your way out of the kitchen for him to follow.

You do as he asks, holding the door for him so he doesn't struggle, stepping nervously behind him as he guides you through to where he's set the dining table up.

His curtains are drawn, a picturesque view of the nightlife of downtown Vancouver, twinkling city lights and the distant flash of vehicles passing by below stands as the most perfect backdrop to his set-up - the table candle-lit, a vase of fresh flowers in the middle, wine glasses and a salad bowl situated around the nice placemats you'd made him buy the last time the two of you went shopping together.

You hesitate when you get a little closer, eyeing up the setting reluctantly as Quinn places the plates in your retrospective places.

He's usually neat when it comes to his dinner table - usually likes to set things up so that they look nice, placemats, coasters. cutlery and napkins - but it's never like this.

"What's all this?" You ask, meeting his eye as he leans across the table to place down the knives and forks you hand to him.

"You said you had a bad week," he shrugs, "Wanted to do something nice."

He shuffles around you, the light placement of his hand on your hip as he does so jolting you toward the table, head swivelling to watch him disappear back toward the kitchen.

"You planned this?" you call after him, turning to look down at everything - a meal that he cooked, something nutritious and filling, knowing you wouldn't have the energy to make as much yourself, pretty flowers, and a calm, ambient atmosphere flooding the room. Your fingers poke softly at the petals on the flowers, lifting them a little to get a better look, mindful of the roses in the arrangement, careful not to be pricked by their thorns. "And you said you didn't think you'd be a good boyfriend,"

The latter sentence is muttered to yourself more than anything, a remembrance of something he'd said a while ago now - something that had always been in the back of your mind when you considered anything more - but your heart drops when you hear him chuckle from not too far behind, spinning on your heels to look at him, wide-eyed and apologetic. "I didnt-,"

“It’s fine,” he assures you, dipping his head but still keeping his gaze on yours, “Wine?”

He holds the bottle up in one hand, and your mouth goes a little dry at the sight of the label, mind going straight back to this time last week, when you had shared a few glasses with him. When things had gone too far.

Quinn's hands were holding you in place on his lap, soft fingers slipping under the hem of his sweatshirt that you wore, sliding up to press into the warm skin of your back, rocking you on his lap as his tongue swiped languidly against your own.

You couldn't quite tell whose mouth the taste of plummy Malbec sat within, but at that point, you didn't care - you'd both drunk enough of it to find yourselves in such a situation, you were at equal fault.

Not that any of it felt wrong in the moment, his hips bucking up as you straddled his thighs, your fingers clutching where his hair grew thick at the back of his neck. Quinn was humming soft, delicious groans straight between your lips, his own closing around your tongue as he sucked on it - all other bodily movements frantic and stuttered until he was repositioning the two of you, laying you back on the couch and gripping the elastic waist of your sweatpants.

It can't have been wrong - not with how easy it all unfolded, your hips lifting until he slid your bottoms off, his fingertips sneaking their beneath the hem of your panties - too drunk to care how sexy they might have been, never expecting to have to even consider such a thing around Quinn - all the while his mouth pressing firm, bruising kisses to your own.

"I shouldn't, I'm driving," you mumble, a soft shake of your head supposed to let him down easy, and to bring your senses back to the present, but his frown just deepens, the crease between his eyebrows now almost a fold.

"You can stay, you know," he tells you, pouring his own glass. "I don't care if you sleep until Sunday, it's not like you haven't spent the weekend before."

"I don't know," You sit cautiously in your seat, watching as he lowers into his own, face morphing into a hard scowl before he lets out a heavy sigh. "What?"

"It's like you've been making excuses not to hang out."

"Or maybe you've been making excuses to hang out," you retort, cringing yourself at how stupid it sounds, looking down into your lap as you place your napkin there so that he can't see the visible curl of your features.

"That doesn't even make sense," you know that, obviously, but you've been avoiding him for a reason - you don't want to have this conversation. You're not ready. "I don't need an excuse, we're friends, it's what friends do."

And God, you wish he'd just stop saying it. It's getting annoying now, your jaw tensing as you huff a short breath out, still keeping your head down to avoid him reading you like an open book - a book that may as well be pictures, at this point, or written for children with the most basic reading comprehension, one sentence per page and clear as day.

"What friends do," you mutter, in disbelief. He's one to talk about what friends do.

Friends don't do what you did last week.

Quinn's body had pretty much completely flopped onto yours, his chest rising and falling in heavy pants, but still careful enough not to bare all his weight on you so that yours could do the same.

Your skin felt clammy all over, baby hairs sticking to the back of your neck and your forehead, your neck slick from where his lips had been pressing all into it, sucking and nipping and you swear you'd even felt the glorious scratch of teeth at one point, and the heat of him above you was doing little to remedy the feeling.

You brought a hand up, almost absent-mindedly, to scratch softly at the back of his head as he came down, an overwhelming dizziness gripping at your eyelids, pulling you down as you felt him follow.

"You're making me feel like I'm going crazy," you sigh, "You can't seriously set all this up and not realise that it's way more effort than anyone would normally put in for someone that's just a friend,"

"You're not just anything," he counters, "When did I say you were just anything?"

He looks annoyed, that much is obvious - and yeah, you've technically been avoiding him, just like he assumes, but he was the one who made you feel like you had to.

A soft, sleepy groan was the first sound that brought you into consciousness the next morning - raspy and thick, and so close to your ear that the feeling of it buzzed the whole way down to your toes.

Then came unassuming movements, a twist of his torso, a shuffle of his hips, the stretch of his legs, all of which had been pressed right against all the same parts of your body - the sticky warmth of him catching your skin and rousing you fully from your sleep.

His arms tightened their hold around you before you really thought he knew what he was doing - a lethargic sigh huffing from his nostrils as he got comfortable again - and you had maybe a solid minute in his embrace until he fully came to.

The two of you were naked, one of the throws from the back of the couch draped lazily over your modesty, but that didn't really matter when you could feel the heavy press of him all over - your chest, your stomach, your hips, your thighs.

His fingers tightened, pressing a little into your waist before his touch disappeared completely. Before he was retreating, untangling himself from your body and sitting up. You felt the couch move as he shuffled around doing God-knows-what - felt the soft drape of the throw back over your body, and the whoosh of cold that followed and refused to leave.

When you dared to open your eyes, he was sat on the other side, leaning over, head in his hands after shrugging his boxers back on.

"Quinn?" you asked, your own voice thick with sleep, straightening to face him properly and rubbing at your eyes until they focused. "What's going on?"

"How much did we have to drink last night?"

Your heart dropped at the question, but your eyes floated over to the coffee table, two empty bottles standing on the other side. "A lot, I guess."

"Shit," he cursed, pushing himself up and pacing in front of the couch, refusing to look at you. "Fuck."

"Q, you're making me dizzy."

"I just," he stopped in place and scratched at the back of his neck, eyes lowering down your body in a way that made heat creep back up your neck, and your shoulders practically fold in on themselves consciously. "I didn't mean for it to go that far."

Your lips parted, although you didn't really know what to say to that. All you could do was nod, stuttered and slow, your gaze shifting too until it landed on the carpeted rug in front of him, focusing too hard on the pattern. "It's fine."

You could feel the weight of his stormy stare, but you couldn't look up - too afraid of rejection, too afraid of regret.

"We're friends, you know, you're-,"

"I know," you confirmed, not needing to hear how he didn't ever intend to be anything more. "We were drunk, Q, it's fine."

Your attempt at a reassuring smile probably looked a little more like a grimace, but you were saved probably by the fact that the two of you had had a lot to drink, and you were honestly a little queasy.

And maybe it had been the cold hard slap of rejection you woke up to that made you feel that way - after years of wanting more with Quinn - but he didn't need to know that. Not if he was already 10 toes deep into a regret spiral so soon after opening his eyes.

"We're friends."

"You said it last Saturday," you frown, "Saturday morning."

"No, you said we were drunk. I said we were friends, but you cut me off-,"

"Yeah, 'cause I didn't really want the first thing you said to me that morning to be that you made a mistake!"

"And here you are again, cutting me off!" his voice is a little raised now - so unlike the soft-spoken Quinn you're used to - easy going and well natured. "I can't win with you, you're either avoiding me like the plague, or you're not letting me speak, either way, I can't clear all this up!"

"What's there to clear up?" you scoff, "I don't need you to hold my hand and give me the full speech, okay, I get it, you don't want to be anything more than-," your body is jolted quickly by the sudden scrape of your chair across the floor, Quinn's grip firm on the leg as he pulls, "Hey, what are you-,"

And he's at the perfect height, then, to meet your lips once you're close enough, his hand leaving the chair to grip at your face - hold you in place so that you can't protest, can't cut him off in this, too, like you have been doing with every other way he's tried to communicate his feelings for you.

His kiss feels familiar, achingly so, the swipe of his tongue soft at the parting of your lips, his own mouth closing in a soft pressure against yours, over and over at a disorienting intensity - all thoughts melting away at his endeavour.

When he pulls away, he keeps his hands in place, watching intently as your eyes flutter open, and you slowly sink back into consciousness, pupils blown when they meet his, intense in their focus on you.

"You're really important to me."

You frown, because your brain will only allow you to process that as the start of rejection - followed by, which is why we can't go further - but that's not the direction Quinn is taking this.

"I wanted to do all of this right. That's why I freaked out last week. I didn't want you to think it was a drunken mistake."

Oh.

You're still a little dazed from the kiss, if you're honest, and so you find yourself blinking slowly back at him, mouth bopping open and closed while you figure out what to say.

"What?" Is all that comes out when you find your voice, watching as he rolls his eyes - part exasperated, part amused.

"Now you have nothing to say?" He scoffs, thumb swiping gently at your cheek as if to show you he's kidding. "I like you. I have for a while, and I want to be more than friends. I want you to stay at my place whenever you come over, and wear my clothes, and eat my food, and drink my wine," he lists, dipping his head closer and closer until you're face to face, a mere inch or two from him kissing you again. "And I want you to sleep here until Sunday. Maybe even after."

"Okay." you respond - the kind of one word answer you've been throwing his way to avoid getting hurt all week. And because you feel guilty, you add, "I want all that, too."

He breathes out a sigh of relief, closing his eyes and smiling slowly - an infectious kind of smile, that has you doing it right back, noses just brushing before you kiss him, again.

Stone cold sober, no longer looking to avoid your feelings, with the intention of being so much more than his friend.

[ki2rins]

liability - yjw

pairings: idol! jungwon x fem! reader || angst, fluff (?) || wc: 1.2k

synopsis: its been six months since you and jungwon broke up. six months since the dreaded break-up conversation you both had on the couch in the apartment you both shared. as the apartment is put up for sale, you walk through the familiar walls one last time, reminiscing all the fond memories with your ex.

rin's yap: the title 'liability' was sitting in my notes for awhile now and i really wanted to incorporate into a fic so here it is! was lowkey inspired by the apartment we wont share by niki too!

➽──────────────❥➽──────────────❥

6 months ago

you and jungwon had been dating for three years. you both met from a mutual and clicked it off instantly. what started from late-night talks became more profound with daily calls and hangouts. within three months, jungwon confessed and you both started being a couple and even bought an apartment to be closer to each other.

everything was smooth sailing till enhypen announced their world tour. obviously you were thrilled for your lover, he has worked so hard to achieve the success he has and you were so proud of him. but what you were worried of was the the distance. would he still have time for you amidst the shows? what about the time difference? would you both be able to get through that hurdle together?

at first, it was going fine. although he didnt have much time to call you due to his schedule and time differences, he still managed to fit a few voice recordings everyday for you to wake up to. you went on with your daily life as well, providing jungwon with little snippets such as pictures of your meals and updating him on your day.

then it hit. it was 2 months into the tour when his behavior took a turn. he stopped sending you daily voice recordings, calling it a hassle when you asked about the change. he did not communicate as much as you did too, only answering questions you asked and sending out the mandatory good mornings and good nights.

you did not want to be pushy about it since he was on tour, and you knew how tired your boyfriend was with all the schedules he had. so you waited and waited till it has been a month since his return. but he was still distant from you - so today was your final straw.

"its my job to be an idol baby, you have to understand. its my job to fly around and perform. i cant just fly back to see you whenever i want, you have to compromise." jungwon raises his voice in hopes that you get his point.

"but you are never around won, never! even if you are in the country, you are always at the company doing i dont know what! theres no communication at all!" you snapped at him without even processing his words.

"im the leader of enhypen, yn. i have responsibilities to uphold and you are just being a liability to me right now."

"a w-what?" you said as you take a step back, trying to take in what your boyfriend has just said to you.

"i dont think we both can handle this anymore yn." jungwon muttered as he looked you in the eyes, staring at the tears streaming down your cheeks. he knew his words broke you as much as it did to his heart.

--------------------------------------

here you are, right in front of the apartment you called home for two years. it was a simple shared abode for you and jungwon - well mostly for you since he was constantly on tours. with a sigh, you opened the wooden door and walked in. the apartment was mostly empty since it was put up for sale, with only certain furniture left since you returned to your parents' house and he returned to his dorm.

as you walked to the living room, there lay only the couch and the tv console. it was as empty as the first day you both moved in. you looked forward and you saw the balcony, one of your favourite spots in the apartment.

"baby, what are you looking at?" you heard jungwon say behind you as you felt his arms snake around your waist.

"just thinking about us and our little home" you spoke, turning around to face your boyfriend as you placed both palms on his cheeks, using your thumbs to rub soft circles into his skin.

jungwon gave you a soft smile and stared into your eyes. "i love you so much you know yn? im so glad that i finally have someone that is waiting for me at home. our home."

"why are you suddenly so cheesy won!" you giggled and pushed him away gently out of shyness. but your action made him hold your waist tighter.

"cant i just show my beautiful girl some love?" he murmurs as he leans down to pepper kisses on your face.

you cant help but smile at the intimate thought you had with jungwon. although he was your ex, he was still part of your life, a major part.

you walked down the hallway next, making your way to what was once your shared bedroom with jungwon. the same bed and vanity were still there. you sat on the bed and glanced around the room, once filled with warmth was now eerily quiet. you traced your fingers on the soft bedding, remembering how he would always listen to your troubles and ease your worries on the same bed you were sitting on.

"its so not fair! i rushed to the shop right after work but it was already sold out!" you whined as jungwon caressed you by placing soft pats on your head.

"its fine baby, you can always get it another time hmm?" jungwon hummed against your skin as he placed soft kisses on your forehead.

you squirmed and shook your head at his words. "no! its not the same! its your favourite, and i wanted to give you a surprise."

jungwon chuckled after he saw you pout. "we can always go together one day, baby. wont you like that more?"

"really?" your eyes lit up at his words.

he pressed another kiss to your forehead, his voice softer this time. "of course baby, anything for you."

the rumble of thunder outside jolted you back to reality, shattering the warmth of the memory. you took it as a sign to leave, not wanting to get caught up in the rain. before stepping out, you cast one last glance at the bedroom - the space where laughter once echoed, where love once lived. and with a quiet breath, you walked out leaving all your fond memories in that four-walled room.

you made your way past the hallway, hands brushing the walls that once hung framed pictures of you and jungwon. at the living room, you took one last look at the couch, where you both said your final goodbyes six months ago. the memory is still fresh in your mind and it is not like you have not thought about it every single day since.

reluctantly, you reached for the door, your heart heavy with all sorts of emotions swirling inside you. but as you swung it open, you were greeted by a frame that towered over you. there he was, right outside.

for a split second, you froze, your heart pounding so loudly you swore the silence between you amplified it. your mouth opened slightly but no words flowed out. you could only look at him, a whirlwind of emotions overtaking your senses - anger, confusion, longing, and a strange sense of vulnerability. the longer you stared at him, the more you felt like everything around you was crumbling.

"yn...i never thought i'll see you here again..."

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© ki2rins 2025, please do not copy or plagiarise my work.

[btsugarush]

I'd Hate To Say it | pjm (teaser)

summary: when you return home from studying abroad, you come to find your former best friend, jimin, has made drastic changes to his life that could put him in danger or behind bars forever.

pairings: drug dealer jimin x fireader.

warnings: smut, violence, fluff, blood and gore, ex best friend jimin, gang member!jimin, tattooed/pierced!jimin, long hair!jimin, use of guns/knives, mentions of self harm, mentions of abuse, alcohol abuse, drugs, drug addiction, angst, murder, strong language, 18+, minors dni.

word count: 796

author’s note: yes yes, I’m getting back into my writing and I’ve finally posted at least the teaser to this fic lol.

Your heart beats heavily against your chest as you finally hear Jimin’s door unlock, the brunette appearing on the other side as it opens. He looks uninterested to see you, an annoyed expression on his face. “What’re you doing here, y/n?” He says dryly. You take a deep breath before you speak. “Is it true?” You ask softly.

Jimin leans against his door frame, a raised eyebrow as he waits for you to explain what you mean, but you don’t. “Is what true?” He urges you to go on. “What everyone is saying… that you– that you have something to do with that boy getting murdered.”

Jimin squints before his dark orbs survey the hallway to make sure no one is around. It was almost like he thought you were setting him up, but regardless of your estranged friendship, he still knew you better than that. Once he made sure the coast was clear, he pulled you by your arm inside his apartment and slammed the door closed. “What’s everyone saying?” He questions.

“That you, along with your little gang associates, had something to do with that shooting that happened in Busan last night.” Jimin scoffs, letting go of your arm. The brunette walks around you, running his fingers through his hair in distress. His back is turned towards you, and he stands in silence for a moment before turning to face you.

“Do you believe them?”

You’d be lying if you said you didn’t. It was time to face the painful truth; Jimin was no longer that sweet boy you used to know. “I don’t know what to believe anymore, Jimin. I mean… since I’ve been back I’ve barely recognized you. You’ve been into a lot of reckless shit, and now you have murder attached to your name? It doesn’t seem too far-fetched anymore.”

Jimin scowled at your insinuation. “Then I guess you got it all figured out, don’t you? Just call the cops now if you’re so sure, y/n.” He pulls his cell from his pocket, reaching out for you to take it. “Go on, take it.” He beckons. You shake your head, refusing the phone. “I didn’t come here to prosecute you, Jimin.” You speak softly. “I came here hoping that it wasn’t you… but I can read you like a book still, and I know you had something to do with it.”

The brunette makes a ‘tsk’ sound. “So what if I did, y/n? Are you gonna rat on me?” He takes a step closer to you, the look in his eyes intimidating; but no matter how hard he tried to instill fear into you, he was still Jimin. “No… but you should turn yourself in. I don’t wanna see you go down like this, Mochi.” You utter the nickname you used to call him when you were kids.

This softens the brunette for a mere moment before he finds himself enraged. “Don’t. Don’t you fucking call me that. Don’t you fuckin’ pretend to give a shit about me. Not after you left me behind.” He grits his teeth, pointing his ringed finger in your face.

“I never left you behind,” you push his finger away, glaring at him. “I had goals, dreams to achieve. I couldn’t be stuck in this dead end life like–”

“Like me?” He cut you off. “Say it, y/n. Say like me.” He pushes. You shake your head, taking a step back from the brunette. “I’d hate to say it, but you’re a lost cause. I should’ve never come here. If you wanna ruin your life forever, that’s fine by me. I’m done caring.” You turn to exit, but Jimin isn’t done guilting you. “You never did.”

This finally boils your blood, and you whip around to face him. “I’m not the one that stopped reaching out, you did!” You remind him. You were tired of being the one to blame for your fallen friendship with Jimin. The phone worked both ways, and he was the one that stopped answering your calls, and calling altogether. “I am tired of being blamed, I am tired of your coldness towards me. I don’t know what the hell you wanted from me!”

“I wanted you to stay!” He snaps. “But you left and I was all alone! I needed you, y/n. I needed you and you fuckin’ left me…” his voice cracks, and for the first time since you’ve been back you see a glimpse of the old Jimin in his eyes. Soft. Innocent. Lost. “I… I don’t know what to say…” your voice is gentle. Jimin finds his composure, shaking his head. “I don’t need you to say shit,” he spat. “You wanna know if I killed that kid? Yeah. I did it.”

[grandline-fics]

Single Red Rose with Shanks please~ 🌹

DESCRIPTION: Single Red Rose- When your date goes wrong, they come to your rescue

WARNINGS: none come to mind

CHARACTERS: Shanks

WORDS: 1,434

A/N: Thank you @littlemissmav for this valentines request. I had a lot of fun with this one and I hope it's to your liking! 🌹

*REQUESTS ARE OPEN*

DIRECTORY | PROMPT LIST | KO-FI | VALENTINES EVENT MASTERLIST

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The bar was as uncharacteristically lively for it still being relatively early in the afternoon but this is what happened when the Red Haired Pirates came back for their visits. Their presence never failed to bring a fresh surge of life to the otherwise calm and peaceful island. The best food and drink were always brought out the second their ship appeared on the horizon in swift preparation for when Shanks and the crew disembarked from the Red Force and began their usual route through the city, gathering their loyal fanbase of civilians eager to hear the newest stories of the crews’ exploits and adventures and those begging to go with them when they’d eventually leave again. As always regardless of what the flurry of questions thrown his way was, Shanks merely laughed and told them. “Have a little patience. We’ll eat and drink first and then we’ll talk.”

“What? Please tell me you’re joking!” Your voice cut through Shanks’ attention on the group he was sitting with in the tavern. Mostly because even though you hadn’t yelled your tone was a definite shift from the air of festivity. His attention was also caught because he had noticed you from time to time when he stopped by the island. With his tankard of ale poised at his mouth, Shanks glanced over his shoulder to see you stood in the corner of the room staring at your friend with wide eyes. “You set me up with someone I don’t even know? Are you crazy?!”

“What?” You friend asked with a small shrug, unbothered. “He’s cute in a certain kind of way.”

“So you go out with him then!” You hissed and Shanks held back a chuckle. 

“It wasn’t me he wanted to ask out, not that it matters. It’s a double date, so I’ll be there too if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Th-that doesn’t matter. What possessed you say yes on my behalf and without even talking to me about it first?” You asked, unable to wrap your head around what was thrown at you. You thought you were having a night out with your friend, now you were facing the reality that a date you hadn’t agreed to was on their way. 

“There wasn’t much time. Besides every time I try to set you up with someone you back out. I think this’ll be fun, you need to put yourself out there again.” Your friend assured you with a smile. “Come on, it’s almost time to meet them. You’ll be thanking me tomorrow for this, I just know it.”

“I highly doubt that.” You grumbled, being pulled from the tavern to the meeting spot. You were still not happy that your friend had yet to apologise for all but forcing you into this with no warning. You were so wrapped up your forced date that you failed to notice you’d gotten Shanks’ attention the whole time, his keen gaze following you as you left the tavern against your will. With you gone, Shanks effortless reentered the conversation currently happening at the table like nothing had happened but his curiosity was definitely piqued.

For the next hour he remained at the bar, enjoying the awed stares as the stories were shared and drinks continued to flow. Still though Shanks couldn’t stop thinking about your unhappy expression as you were dragged from the bar. It was so unlike you because anytime he did spot you in his visits here you were always smiling so sweetly. It didn’t sit right with him that you were clearly uncomfortable but who knew? Perhaps the date was actually working out well as your friend had predicted it would. Knowing he couldn’t properly enjoy himself until he had his answer, Shanks got to his feet and lightly clapped Benn on the shoulder. “Going for a change of scenery. Might be back in a bit.”

Used to his Captain’s random whims, Benn merely nodded and waved him off. He’d either see Shanks back here, back on the ship or randomly the next day at some stage depending on what kind of mischief he managed to come across on his solo wandering. Shanks didn’t know exactly where you’d gone for your date but he'd been to the island enough times to know the key spots couples tended to go to-especially for first dates- and headed for those first. The first couple places got him nowhere but the third place he spotted you immediately. Your friend and her date were all but draped over each other while you were the complete opposite to your date. You sat angled in your seat, trying to create space between you and him while he was oblivious and attempting to convince you to come closer.

“Promise I won’t bite, don’t be shy and come closer.”

“I’m happy where I am thanks.” Oh this was painful to watch and Shanks’ eyes narrowed slightly when he saw your date gearing up to press again for you to move closer to him. Immediately he approached, throwing his arm out wide and calling out to you. “Baby, there you are!” You and the others in the building looked his way and when you saw the Emperor’s stare on you, you choked on your drink. No. There was no way he was talking to you and yet here he was, not looking anywhere else but your face. “I was looking everywhere for you. I know I was a little late but that’s no reason to go out with someone else to make me jealous.”

You could only part your lips and try to remember how to speak but nothing coherent was coming to you. All you could really register firmly in your mind was Shanks was in front of you. Your shock only grew when he fell to his knees in front of your seat and took your hand into his. “Please give me another chance. Just say the word and I’ll sweep you off your feet all over again.”  

Shanks gave you a wink that your date couldn’t see, wordlessly telling you to play along. At the prospect of cutting the date short your brain began to function again and you let out a small laugh. “Sweep me off my feet, huh?” You repeated, feeling your nerves settle when Shanks’ strong fingers lightly squeezed yours in reassurance. Feeling stronger you cleared your throat and tried to look convincing enough that the others wouldn’t see through the lie. “I suppose giving you a second chance is the least I could do seeing as you tracked me down.”

Grinning Shanks was on his feet in seconds and in a swift but smooth motion had you lifted onto your feet and effortlessly guiding you outside. “Seriously thank you for that, you’re a life saver.”

“Life saver?” Shanks grinned as you let out a calming breath, leaning against a random building he’d stopped beside. “He that bad?”

“Apart from the backhanded compliments, blatantly eyeing up others, and ordering more drinks before I was finished my first one yeah he was swell.” You sighed. You had a feeling your friend only dragged you along on the date because hers asked if she knew anyone for his friend and it had nothing to do with getting you to ‘put yourself out there.’ Still Shanks didn't need to hear any of that, he’d done his part so you smiled at him once more and moved to walk again. “Thanks again.”

“Woah, where do you think you’re going?” Shanks asked, falling into step beside you but remaining a gentleman by not touching you. Last thing he wanted was to take you from one uncomfortable situation and put you in another. “I promised to sweep you off your feet, remember. That's if you want to?”

“You were serious?” You asked in surprised, looking to see he his expression showed no deception. There was no denying he was a very handsome man and it wasn’t everyday you got an offer of a date with someone like him. “Okay, I did promise you a second chance after all. Sweep away.” Grinning Shanks stepped a little closer and took your hand to lead you somewhere different, glancing at you when you laughed softly. “When you got on your knees back there and pretended to beg for me to take you back I thought you were going to propose.”

“I guess it did look like that.” Shanks agreed with a laugh before offering you a playful smile. “But before we move on to marriage we’ll eat and drink first…then we’ll talk.” 

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[belu-4]

Marked by you

Couple: Alpha!Patri guijarro x Omega!Fem!Reader

Au!Omegaverse, Alpha x Omega.

Words count: 3,7k

Warning: +18

Patri has never been one of those alphas who believes in destiny or the idea that there is an Omega waiting for her somewhere in the world. For Patri, football has always been the only constant in her life, the only thing that really matters. Love, bonding, brands… She sees all of that as a distant, almost unreal concept. It's not that she doesn't understand instinct, but she's never felt that pressing need to claim or be claimed.

At least, until Y/N arrives at Barcelona.

Signed alongside Ewa Pajor, both from Wolfsburg and best friends. Ewa knew everything about Y/N and vice versa. From the moment Patri sees and meets Y/N, something changes in her.

Y/N is not just any forward; she is fast, intelligent and with a presence on the court that makes it impossible not to look at her. But what really throws her off is not her talent, but the way her body reacts to her presence. Her scent envelops her in a way she has never experienced before, her alpha wolf roars inside her every time Y/N gets too close, every time she smiles at her in that playful way that leaves her head in a mess.

“Well, as you may have heard, we have signed two new players,” Pere said during a meeting before the start of preseason. “Both from the same team in Germany… Please welcome Ewa Pajor and Y/N Weisz, we still have one more signing to finish, but the staff and I are quite excited to welcome these great players.”

Y/N POV.

Ewa and I walked slowly into the meeting room where the players of the squad were. As I entered, I automatically grabbed Ewa’s hand, my nerves jumped when I saw how many people were sitting in front of us, I thought it would only be the players, but there were people from the staff, I assumed the physios, that room was full of people.

“Come on Pup, you can do it” she pulled my hand so I could follow her to one side of Pere. While Pere was talking to us and, I assumed, introducing us, I let my gaze wander around the room. I spotted a person in the audience, which made me feel calmer, until I felt someone push me lightly. “You should introduce yourself Y/N”

“Umm, of course. I’m Y/N Weisz, I’m English and ummh… I play forward, nice to meet you”

I heard Ewa laugh beside me, which made me look at her badly as I let go of her hand “stupid” I wherpered just so she could hear. She just laughed. “You can go take a seat, we are going to talk about what is coming up in the preseason”

There were some free seats next to Alexia, where Ewa and I went to sit. As I settled into the seat, I smelled something that made me frown, Ewa noticed it “what is it pup? Is there something wrong?” I looked at her and gave her a small smile “do you remember that a few years ago I told you that I might have found my partner?” She gave me a confused look while nodding slightly “Girls, can you please pay more attention”

“I’m sorry Pere”

I looked to the side before wherpering “I think she is here” I received a surprised look from Ewa, but neither of them said anything else.

A few chairs away, Patri and Pina sat together playing while waiting for Pere to start talking about what he had planned for the preseason. After the new girl came in, Patri had started to feel strange, which was noticeable by not paying much attention to what Pina was saying to her.

“Damn Patri, could you pay more attention to me? I've been talking for more than 5 minutes”

“Sorry Pina, I got distracted by something stupid”

While Patri responded, without having any idea what Pina had said, she couldn't take her eyes off Y/N, there was something about the girl that made it almost impossible for her not to look at her and keep an eye on her.

“Stop looking at her, you look like a stalker... you're scary”

“Shut up, I'm not looking at Y/N”

Pina let out a laugh when she saw how her friend gave herself away “I never said you were looking at Y/N” Patri sighed as she lowered her head in defeat.

Two months had passed since Y/N's arrival in Barcelona and since then Patri has not stopped feeling strange. Despite trying to ignore what her body tells her every time the forward is near, the reality is that every interaction with her makes her self-control become more fragile.

Y/N's scent has become intoxicating to her, impossible to ignore. Her alpha wolf growls every time the omega gets too close to her, every time he brushes her arm in training or smiles at her in that playful way that leaves her head in a mess.

Y/N, for her part, is already fully integrated into the team. She has made friends with several of her teammates and her relationship with Patri has evolved into a kind of constant game of provocations. Sometimes, Y/N gets too close, pretending to need help with a play, when in reality she just wants to see how Patri tenses up in front of her.

u closeness. Other times, she drops comments that make Patri choke on her water in the middle of the locker room, which causes laughter in the rest of the team.

The connection between them is obvious to everyone, except Patri, who continues to refuse to accept what is more than obvious to the rest of the team: Y/N is her omega.

The music boomed in the club, and Y/N enjoyed the company of her teammates. Patri stayed close, always watching, with that intense gaze that sometimes made her shudder. However, in a moment of distraction, an unknown alpha got too close to Y/N. her strong and dominant scent suddenly surrounded her, and before she could react, she felt how they tried to mark her with their scent.

Y/N’s instinct screamed danger. She shifted uncomfortably, trying to get away, but the alpha insisted with a sly smile.

“You have no mark,” he said arrogantly. “You could use someone like me.”

Before Y/N could respond, a deep growl cut through the air. Patri was there, her body standing between them. Her presence was an imposing shadow, her eyes shining with suppressed fury.

“She doesn’t need anything from you,” her voice was low, dangerous.

The alpha raised her hands in mockery, but Patri gave him no chance to continue. He approached Y/N, leaning towards her neck, and without hesitation, he slid her nose along her omega’s exposed skin, releasing her own scent in an unmistakable way. Patri’s fragrance enveloped Y/N, replacing any trace of the intruding alpha.

Y/N felt her body relax, her instincts finally calming at being protected. Her alpha had marked her, at least with her scent.

The other alpha clicked his tongue and walked away in annoyance. Patri, without turning away, looked at Y/Nintensely.

“Are you okay?”

Y/N nodded, but her heart was pounding. “Thank you…”

Patri just looked at her for a moment before muttering, “I’m not going to let anyone touch you.”

And in that instant, Y/N knew that maybe, just maybe, Patri was finally starting to accept the inevitable.

After that occasion, things had undeniably changed. Y/N trusted Patri more, they went out more often and used to meet up at someone’s apartment to watch movies or a series they had recently started watching together.

Although one of them was collapsing emotionally.

Patri was afraid, she was afraid of love and destiny. Y/Nwas her fear made person.

Four months had passed since Y/N had arrived in Barcelona and Patri had already accepted the inevitable. Her alpha wanted that Omega, she wanted to claim her. Although Patri needed advice or to talk to a more experienced alpha.

“I need your help…”

Patri quickly entered the café where she had met Ingrid and Frido.

“Ther sounds serious,” Ingrid commented, leaning on the table in curiosity. “What’s wrong?”

Patri sighed, running a hand through her hair. “It’s Y/N. I don’t know what to do with her. My alpha wants her, but I don’t know how to take the next step.”

Frido smiled in amusement. “Why don’t you just mark her and be done with it? Easy.”

“Frido…” Ingrid rolled her eyes. “Not all alphas are as direct as you.”

Patri snorted. “Exactly. I don’t want to scare her or do something that will make her back off.”

Ingrid gave her a sympathetic look. “If she’s your Omega, she’ll know. You just need to show her that you’re there, that you’re not going to keep her waiting.”

But Patri still had doubts…

Patri had managed to sneak out of the locker room before Y/N showed up. She didn’t want to see her yet, not after Ingrid and Frido had made her face her own feelings. So she had opted to seek refuge in the gym, only to be found minutes later by Alexia and Aitana looking grumpy.

“What’s wrong with you?” Aitana asked, leaning against one of the machines with her arms crossed.

“It must be because she’s realized she’s completely in love with Y/Nand doesn’t know what to do about it,” Alexia replied with a sly smile.

Patri groaned. “Can you two not jump to your stupid conclusions for five minutes?”

Aitana raised her hands in peace. “Okay, okay. But if you wanted to talk to us, it’s for a reason.”

Patri sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “I don’t know what to do,” she admitted in a lower voice than usual.

Alexia and Aitana exchanged a look.

“About what?” Aitana asked, though they both already knew the answer.

Patri pressed her lips together, as if she was having trouble forming the words. “About Y/N. My alpha… wants to mark her. But I don’t want to screw up.”

Alexia burst out laughing. “Jeez, Patri! You say that like you’re going to bite her neck all of a sudden in the middle of a game.”

Aitana joined in. “Though it would be fun to see that.”

Patri rolled her eyes, but couldn’t help but smile a little.

Alexia sighed and patted her on the back. “Look, if you really want her—and from the way you look at her, it’s pretty clear that you do—all you have to do is show her.”

“But if you really want her, you’ll have to do it.”

“Without being a brute,” Aitana added.

“Yes, without being a brute,” Alexia repeated with a smile. “Just be yourself, but don’t hold back so much. Y/Nis waiting for something from you, Patri. Don’t make her wait forever.”

Patri was silent for a moment, letting her words sink in. Then she nodded slowly.

“Okay.”

“Okay?” Aitana repeated with an arched eyebrow.

Patri smiled, more confident ther time. “Okay.”

The night when everything changes is nothing extraordinary. There is no special occasion, no event that marks the moment, but the tension between them has been a constant in recent months, growing like a fire that neither of them has wanted to put out.

Patricio and Y/N are at Patri’s apartment, like so many other times. Dinner has been quiet, full of glances that say more than their mouths dare to admit. Y/N sits on the couch, legs folded under her, wearing a Patri t-shirt that's too big for her. The scent of her Alpha permeates the fabric, enveloping her like a constant reminder of who she belongs to, even if she doesn't officially belong there yet.

Patri sits beside her, elbows on knees, eyes fixed on the TV screen, but she's not watching anything. She knows. Y/N knows. It's now or never.

"Patri." Y/N’s voice is soft, but firm.

The Alpha turns her face toward her, her dark eyes reflecting something contained, something she's tried to suppress for too long.

"Yes?"

Y/N licks her lips, her heart pounding. She doesn't want to beg, but she doesn't want to keep waiting either. "How much longer are you going to make me wait?"

Silence settles between them, heavy, burdened. Patricio doesn't answer right away. A few minutes pass, with Y/N waiting expectantly for an answer that never comes.

Taking that as a negative, Y/N decides to leave Patri's apartment, with a big wound in her heart.

“I think I screwed up”

“No shit Sherlock”

Patri looked down when she heard the tone of voice Ewa used with her.

“I panicked, understand me”

Alexia let out a sigh as she thought about how to help her friend.

“I know you're young and you tend to panic on certain occasions Patri, but your actions speak for you this time, and she ended up hurt”

“I know Ale, but what could I say to her?”

The conversation ended there, with a rather affected Patria, thinking about how to talk about that subject with Y/N again and be able to explain her reaction.

Before leaving the locker room, Alexia spoke again “Y/N won't come today, apparently she woke up a little sick and asked Pere for the day off” and with that, she left.

Now Patri had only one mission, go and see her omega and let her know that she wouldn't make her wait for her any longer. She went to talk to Pere, convincing her to let her go because she felt a little sick to her stomach and that she wouldn't be able to train. Pere also gave Patri the day off, believing her poorly crafted lie.

With permission granted, Patri went to her car and then headed to the supermarket that was near Y/N's apartment. She bought candy, chocolates, food and medicine for everything, in case she had a cold, in case she had a migraine, in case she had an upset stomach. Patri was prepared for everything.

Or well, almost everything.

She never imagined that the health problem that had prevented Y/Nfrom going to train that day would be her heat.

When Y/N opened the apartment door, thinking it was Ewa who would bring her food for the day, she was surprised to see Patri standing in front of her.

“Patri? What are you doing here, you should be training with the others…”

Patri was standing there without making any movement yet. The aroma Y/N was giving off was driving her crazy, she wasn't thinking very clearly anymore.

“Ewa sent you? Something bad happened to her?”

“Y/N..”

Y/N placed a hand on her shoulder, which made Patri's body react automatically. Y/N realized ther when she looked down to see what she had bought. Patri was having an erection right now in front of her. Y/N's Omega instincts were playing against her at that moment, the only thing she could think about was servicing her alpha's erection, being able to feel it and make her come.

“I... thanks for coming to see me Patri, but it's not the right time” Y/N was sweating, feeling her body beginning to go through another heat wave and her crotch getting wetter and wetter.

“Yes, sorry I...” Patri gripped the bags that were still hanging from her hands tighter. Her breathing was getting deeper and deeper, her face was now more rosy.

Y/N saw that doubt crossed Patri's face and she decided to take the initiative “You can leave the things in the kitchen… I'll go to my room” she moved to the side, leaving enough space for Patri to enter.

It was clearly a lie, as soon as Patri began to put things away, Y/N stood behind her and hugged her. She let her hands rest on Patri's abdomen, leaving light caresses, feeling the warm skin against the tip of her fingers, which made her moan.

Patri let her instincts carry her. She quickly turned around and captured Y/N's lips in hers. Y/N moaned in the middle of the kiss, urging Patri to continue. She grabbed her thighs and lifted her onto the counter.

“Please, Patri…”

Patri growled into Y/N's neck, close to where her mating mark should be.

Patri smiled mischievously, feeling her heartbeat intensely. Y/N's burning gaze turned her on even more, and the atmosphere was charged with an electric tension that enveloped them.

“Yes, that's exactly what I want,” Y/N answered in a small voice, her breathing ragged. Patri's eyes sparkled as she heard her Omega's plea. She knew that the moment was what they both wanted, a crossing of desires and instincts that they could no longer ignore.

Patri leaned forward, her lips barely brushing Y/N’s soft, warm skin, causing her to close her eyes in pure delight. “You have to tell me,” she whispered, her hot breath caressing Y/N’s neck, making Y/N shiver. She wanted to hear it, she wanted to know how far she was willing to go.

“I want to feel your mark, my alpha, please…” Y/N’s voice was almost a wail, an irresistible invitation. Patri’s hands began to roam Y/N’s body, exploring every curve, every angle. She lifted her shirt, exposing her abdomen, and slowly lowered her lips, leaving a trail of kisses that made Y/N’s skin burn.

“You’re so beautiful,” Patri murmured, leaving a kiss on the underside of her breast. The sound of Patri’s voice made Y/N’s body react immediately; her lips parted and a moan escaped her mouth again. She could feel Patri’s need, the palpable desire flowing between them.

With a speed that took her by surprise, Patri lifted herself up a little, positioning herself between Y/N’s legs, who could wait no longer. Her face burned with desire as Patri looked into her eyes, seeking consent in every moment, every touch.

“Are you ready?” Patri asked, her lips just inches from Y/N’s, as if they were dancing in a current of sexual energy.

“Yes, fuck…” Y/Nanswered, eager, her voice full of longing.

Patri smiled, feeling that little phrase light a flame inside her. “Then I won’t stop,” she said in a husky voice, full of promise.

She took the head of her member in her hands, moving closer to Y/N’s entrance, feeling how wet and ready she was for her. With a firm but tender movement she pushed it in, Patri kissed her again, their time with a fierce passion that made both bodies move in perfect rhythm.

Patri began to rock her hips faster and more urgently, while Y/N couldn't stop moaning and asking for her alpha. The counter shook under the weight of their bodies, but nothing mattered. There was only them, unleashing a storm of sensations. Y/N's nails dug into Patri's back, inviting more.

“Yes Patri, right there… God”

Y/N's head fell forward, resting on Patri's shoulder, while she took one of Y/N's legs and lifted it up on the counter to get deeper. “Is that what you want? For me to fill you up and have my puppies?”

“Yes… I want you to call me Patri… Fill me with your cum”

“You feel so good… Y/N, my friend” Patri ran her tongue over the spot of the mark, preparing it to place her mark.

When Patri felt Y/N’s walls begin to close around her cock, she began to make deeper movements. She was turned on by the idea of ​​being able to fill her omega’s pussy, seeing how Y/N then dripped with her cum.

“Take it all Cari… I want to see how good you will look filled with me”

The only sound that could be heard in that kitchen was that of both of their hips colliding, besides the wet sound they made.

“Patri, I'm going to do it... keep going like that, please.”

Y/N bit her lip to avoid making more noise, but Patri stopped her movements a little when she saw that. “No, Patri... why are you stopping?” Patri brought her hand to Y/N's face and her fingers caressed her lips. “I want to hear you, Y/N…”

After that exchange of words, Patri went back to her swing, waiting for her omega to climax.

As soon as she felt the spasms run through Y/N's body, Patri bit Y/N's neck, finally being able to mark her as hers.

Within minutes, they were both in Y/N's room, where she was riding Patri. Y/N was leaning forward slightly, holding onto Patri's abdomen, leaving scratches, but Patri couldn't care less if that meant seeing her omega jump on her cock and have her tits bouncing in her face.

For the next two days, neither of them left that apartment, although well, Patri was forced to stay lying next to her omega (recently claimed) since she didn't want to feel her alpha away from her. When Y/N's heat ended, they both had to go back to training, normally.

As soon as they arrived at the sports city, it was more than obvious to everyone what had happened, and well, if it wasn't obvious, Y/N proudly showed off the recently acquired mark. Behind her, Patri walked in, a small smile on her lips at something Y/N had said on the way to the locker room.

When Y/N walked out onto the field to warm up with Ewa and Keira, Alexia was the first to make a mocking comment to Patri.

"Welcome to the claimed Alphas club, Patri," Alexia says with amusement. "You've got a great life ahead of you." Everyone present burst out laughing at what Alexia said and at the sight of Patri blushing.

"Honestly, I thought it would take you another year," Frido adds with a smile.

I did my best with this. revised I hope you like it

[dronningreid]

All my what-ifs.

At his darkest point, Reid decides to meet with reader under the pretext of closing that chapter in his life, but maybe his feelings for reader are more alive than he thought.

change the ending series masterlist

who? Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

category: angst

warnings/content: mentions of Maeve, discussions in a public place, mentions of sex (nothing explicit), special appearance by sassy Reid (because i'm his fan) mild use of vodka and mention of alcohol. English is not my first language.

word count: 3.8K

a/n: Obviously the name of this part is a reference to cardigan but I love What if...? so it's a fun coincidence. And I have a very good justification for what reader did so wait for the final part. I wrote this a while ago and I was going to wait longer to publish this but unfortunately I've been too busy to finish my drafts and it's been a rough couple of days which has also prevented me from doing what I love most. Anyway I hope you enjoy this <3

What if you were to appear in his life again?

Maybe if he hadn't asked that damn question...

Well, long before that, a lot of blood had already been shed and most of it was his.

What if he agreed to meet you?

Well, it was something Spencer was about to find out and honestly it wouldn't be the first time a question had gotten him into trouble.

<<Maybe the past should stay where it was>> He kept telling himself but he was never good with that.

"Hey Spence, drinks at O'Keefe, you come?" JJ asked as the rest of the team made their way to the elevator.

Reid pulled on his coat. "No, I uh, I have a date." The words were out before he could reason them out. "Well, it's not really a date, more of a meeting of old acquaintances..."

JJ understood immediately. "The lawyer?"

Reid's gaze was lost on the floor. "Yeah, her." He sighed.

"Are you going to see her? I don't know if that's a good idea." JJ didn't get a answer.

"I read the file I asked Garcia to make for you. Her mother was the principal at your high school and her father was a professor at MIT at the time when you studied there before going to Caltech." Yes JJ, there was a reason why that had happened. "That happened a decade ago Spence, I guess it ended badly and I know for a fact that no one can be special for that long time, not like that."

"She does." The truth broke through his stone wall. "A file doesn't say how much I loved her, all the times we shared, how I thought I knew her better than she knew herself, and it doesn't say I slept with her." The lump in his throat thickened. "Someone I had my first times with will be special until the day I die."

The thoughts materialized into reality before he could stop them. It was horrifying to be seen so vulnerable by someone...

But he had to admit that it felt good to relieve some of the burden on his bones.

JJ's eyebrows rose and her eyes widened. "You're right..." She whispered. "But if she's so special, why didn't you treat her like that at the police station?"

Reid picked up his briefcase. "I wouldn't have done it if she hadn't crushed my heart." He replied curtly before walking past her towards the exit.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

"What are you going to order?" You asked him as your eyes scanned the menu.

He should be repeating your action, but instead he was watching you.

From the moment you entered the restaurant he felt like he was so close to have a heart attack. Well, his skin was cold, he was dazed and he swore he felt a pressure in his chest but of course he knew he wasn't having a heart attack because statistically it's more common to have a heart attack after the 45 than at his age.

"Same as you." He replied without interest in a successful attempt to hide his true feelings.

You nodded before pointing the waiter to the saucer on the menu. "Two orders but one without creamed spinach."

A crack appeared in his stone wall.

His heart skipped a beat at that 'nonsense' and he hated himself for it.

He seemed to be 100% sure that you never loved him and now you came out with this, remembering perfectly what he hated...

The waiter took the order and then left with the menus.

He was so quiet so you decided to be the first to break the ice. "How's your mom?"

His mind played tricks on him as projected the time he introduced you to his mother. "She's fine." He said defensively.

Your brow furrowed. "Hey, you were the one who called." You had a very good point that even he couldn't deny.

He sighed and folded his hands together on the table. "And you were the one who suggested we meet."

You leaned over the table. "Don't start with that or you'll lose." The waiter came back and left the dishes on the table, so you rejoin in your seat.

"Lose? Is everything a game to you?" He asked sternly. Oh no, this was heating up a lot sooner than you anticipated.

"Of course not." You defended yourself. "But don't pretend that I started this when I know damn well that you investigated me."

His brow furrowed as a question swam through his mind. "It wasn't me to begin with."

"Oh sure." You took out your cell phone and placed it on the table.

He took your cell phone when he saw a photo of him with Penelope taken directly from her instagram.

"I get a notification every time someone searches for me on the internet, but I didn't get the IP address of course was the FBI." You explained.

"A little so paranoid, don't you think?" He said cynically.

"Let me continue." You reprimanded him. "And oh surprise after being investigated by someone anonymous, a certain Penelope Garcia started following me on Instagram."

Reid closed his eyes for a moment. "In my defense, I didn't ask her to do that." JJ do, but he don't.

"Of course, it was like a favor between friends?" You crossed your arms.

He looked at you directly. "What does that tell you that she's only my friend?" Reid knew exactly what he meant by that.

"Well she's not your wife." You looked at his hands thankfully finding the absence of a ring. "And I doubt she's your girlfriend. She's not your type." Your second statement was accompanied by a slight movement at the corner of your mouth, almost like a smile.

He leaned forward. "Oh yeah? So who's my type?" He whispered so damn provocative.

Spencer had that damn power where his eyes seemed to be able to read your soul. "Me." The words left your mouth almost immediately.

"Don't give yourself so much credit." That was a huge blow to your ego. "Maybe you were my type, when I was seventeen. But look at you and look at me. I'm thirty one and I'm not a kid anymore."

And when you had nothing left you used your last weapon. "Well, you act like one."

Reid sighed as if it wasn't worth his time to continue wasting his time on you. "You and your old tricks."

You looked away, trying to find a better counterattack. "So tell me, what's your type now?" Curiosity won out over revenge.

"Well I'm dating someone now." Those simple words were the equivalent of a gunshot or so you thought, you'd never been shot.

You swallowed in an attempt to undo the lump in your throat. "And what is she like?" Yeah, maybe you didn't want to hear the answer to that.

"Very clever would be an understatement." He replied proudly.

<<Of course, someone like him>> you thought.

At that moment a memory invaded your mind.

"So you're dating with Spencer Reid? Isn't he too smart for you?"

Words spoken 14 years ago still had the power to make you feel so small and it was worse when it were accompanied by that thunderous teenage laughter.

"And is she pretty?" You asked as if something as absurd as physical appearance would make you feel better.

His mistake was answering you truthfully. "I think so." He immediately scolded himself.

Your brow furrowed. “You think so? So you don’t even know what she looks like?” You let out a humorless laugh. “That’s so stupid, dating someone you’ve never even met.”

His eyes flared with anger, but he tried to maintain his composure. "Appearance is not something that has ever mattered to me and even though I have never seen her in person I know her better than I ever knew you."

"If appearance never mattered to you then what the hell did you see in me?" Your voice rose a little. "Because I was never as smart or perfect as you wanted me to be."

"I never, ever made you feel inferior to me." His voice rose as well. "And now that I think about it, I have no idea what the hell I ever saw in you."

Your bottom lip trembled slightly, almost imperceptible but he saw it and you saw that he saw it, so you looked away in an attempt to not look so fragile.

"I..." His voice faltered, of course he was still angry but the possibility of hurting you, no matter how small, made him feel like he didn't deserve the air he breathed. "I really don't know, it was only when I least expected it that the feelings were there..." He sighed. "I guess I just needed the happiness you gave me." His words were barely a whisper.

How could forget?, you had drew stars around his scars from the second he met you. But what did that matter when you made him bleed?

"And now someone else gives you that happiness?" You looked down at the floor, fearing the answer.

When he said yes it was like you had nothing left. Immediately your eyes filled with tears and you tried at all costs to avoid him noticing.

But he was a profiler so of course he noticed.

What if you would've confessed the truth on that swing?

Before answering his question, it's necessary to take a look at the past.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

<<I did something wrong?>> The question settled in his mind a week ago when you started acting weird around him, but since then the question wouldn't leave him alone.

You were alone in home, just lying on the couch watching TV.

But you were forced out of the comfort of the blanket when there was a knock on the door. “Who is it?” You wondered if you should pull out the welcome mat or a knife.

"Spencer Reid." He didn't need to say his full name, it's not like you'd meet another Spencer and even if you did, when you heard the name you'd only think of him, your boyfriend.

Hearing his voice from the other side of the door, you immediately put on your slippers to go over and open the door and when you did...

"You've never told me what your favorite flowers are, so I bought one of each. Well, at least from the ones in the flower shop." As he explained, your eyes took in each beautiful flower perfectly arranged in the large, beautiful bouquet. "Maybe I should have gone to a bigger flower shop..."

You immediately shook your head and moved closer to join your lips with his. He accepted immediately, placing his free hand on your waist.

You gave him small kisses before pulling away. "It's perfect, thank you." You whispered before taking the bouquet.

You went to get a flower vase from the kitchen and you didn't see Spencer, so you peeked out only to see him standing in the doorway, waiting.

"Are you a vampire who needs to be invited in?" After a week a joke had the honor of leaving your lips.

He smiled shyly before he closed the door behind him. "Where's your dad?"

"Exam season he stays late, you know." You explained as you filled the flower vase with water. "You must be pretty stressed and busy too." You glanced at him briefly before placing the flowers in the vase.

"I'm never busy for you." He cautiously approached you.

Your gaze was lost in the beautiful bouquet he bought for you and then you had a hard time breathing because of how sweet he was, such a good boyfriend, so perfect. You thought that you didn't deserve him.

"Well then what do you want to do? We can go outside to the swings in the garden or we can go up to my room while dad is not there." You suggested, lowering your voice a little as you said the second.

Reid's cheeks quickly flushed pink. "I... uhm." He scratched the back of his neck.

His skin grew warm just remembering your hand inside his sweatshirt. It had only been a couple of days since his first time with you and he was still breathless just remembering it.

"We can go to the swings and talk, that's what I came here." He paused. "But if you want, we can go to your room afterwards..." He whispered.

Both swung on the swings, the air brushing against your face as both rose higher.

"And what did you want to talk about?" You asked while stretching your legs to climb higher than him.

He stopped the swing from moving and looked at you as if silently requesting you to imitate his action.

Your swing stopped next to his. “You’ve been a little distant lately. Did I do something to upset you or hurt you in some way?” He scanned your expression for answers.

You shook your head immediately.

"So what is it?" He looked at you with pleading eyes before taking your hand and rubbing your knuckles with his thumb. "You know you can tell me anything, right?"

You nodded, you needed to tell him something and despite what he said you couldn't tell the truth. So you opted for something else that had also made your days bad.

You took a deep breath. "My parents are getting divorced."

He looked at you with understanding but said nothing, waiting for you to continue.

"I was having a bad day and luckily you showed up." You smiled lightly at him. "They gave me the news a few days ago and I don't know how I didn't see it coming. My mom is in Las Vegas and my dad is here in Cambridge. I thought the long distance relationship was working for them but it turns out that they cannot tolerate being close to each other."

Your eyes filled with tears. "I know I'm not a little girl anymore who has to suffer because her parents are separating, but it hurts." He nodded before placing a sweet kiss on your knuckles. "Now that I think about it, I don't know of any relationship that has lasted that long. Can love last that long? Because if not, then how much time do we have left?"

Panic welled up in his gut. “We’re not your parents and we’re not my parents.” He tightened his grip on your hand slightly. “I’ll always be yours.” So that’s why it’s said to be careful what you say.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

"Have you ever wondered what would happened if you had told me the truth that night at your house?" The question came out before he could stop it.

You managed to keep not a single tear from falling, you had gotten good at that over the years. "You would've broken up with me." Yes, you had thought about that a thousand times.

"It's not true." The truth was humiliating. "And if it had been so, what was the point of you leaving me first?" He scolded you, pain and repressed anger seeping through every syllable.

What if you hadn't left like a father and running like water? The answer was not good for his dignity.

"Well if you think you have the answer tell me what would have happened if I had told you the truth that day?" You asked abruptly.

The truth was something I would never say out loud to you, but I had thought about that answer for 14 years.

He wanted to think that both would have worked things out together, that both would stay together until you finished college and then he would bought the most beautiful ring and gotten down on one knee.

You probably said yes and then you would be his wife now, Mrs. Reid. And maybe both would have a child, maybe two.

But that was only a possibility 14 years ago, now it was an impossibility. Because he lived in a cruel reality where he wasn't your husband or the father of your children.

"We could have fixed it." He replied with a half-truth, leaving out the rings, the white dress, and the cribs. "But you left me and ran away from me..." The words burned in his throat.

"I wasn't running away from you..." You whispered.

"Then what?" His tone was harsh.

"Of the consequences." You tried to hide the vulnerability in your words, but what your lips hide, your eyes show.

He had nothing left, why continue hiding the truth? "I would have forgiven you." He confessed quietly.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

Spencer hated when you and him separated at parties, because he was only there for you.

This time both separated because you had to go to the bathroom or so he thought.

"Hey Spencer, you need to control your damn girlfriend." Kelly's words made him frown.

"What are you talking about?"

"Haven't you heard? The whole school is whispering that she slept with Ryan and like two minutes ago she kissed him in the garden." Kelly replied, almost steaming from her ears.

But for Reid what Kelly said couldn't be true, you would never be capable of doing something like that...

But once doubt sets in there's only one way to stop it. So he came look for you.

When you came out of the bathroom a couple of girls gave you a glass of vodka perhaps, a glass that you accepted.

You took a sip before walking into the living room, back to Spencer. But he met you halfway and snatched the glass from your hand. "You said you weren't going to drink tonight." He spoke in an unusually serious tone.

"I'm sorry, but the girls just showed up." He continued to look at you with that horrible seriousness. "I only took a sip, if you want I can throw it." Your attempt to please him didn't work.

"Whatever, that doesn't matter now." He set the glass down somewhere. "We need to talk." He ordered, the boy who always asked you if you wanted to do something or not.

Your hands immediately turned cold. Maybe he had already decided that you weren't enough for him. "Yes, yes. Here or-?"

"Outside." He took your hand and led you outside before you could say anything.

"Kelly told me something... interesting." He kept his ice mask on or he probably would collapse there.

"Kelly always tells gossips, she loves gossip." You laughed at the quality of your 'friend' who was one minute away from ruining your life.

Spencer didn't laugh, he remained serious. "Kelly said you kissed Ryan today and that you slept with him." You immediately frowned upon hearing something as absurd as that.

Then some popular guys walked past you and Spencer, unfortunately you heard what they were whispering.

"What's someone like her doing with a nerd like him?"

"She's going to end up being a loser like him." Well at least he already has a PhD and is close to have another one.

Well, you'd heard worse things about him and yourself actually.

"Is that true?" He ask, obviously trying to find out the truth and recapture your attention that was lost with those boys.

"Can we talk about this somewhere else?" You insisted when you felt those looks judging you, mocking you, burning you...

"Why? Are you ashamed of me?" He crossed his arms and looked at you sternly.

"What?!" You immediately scolded yourself as you earned glances from a few guys.

"I'm sick of pretending I don't notice that you've been avoiding physical contact when we're with your friends lately, among other things that make it seem like you're embarrassed to dating with me." Between his words and the stares on your face you felt breathing getting harder with every second.

"Spencer, can we really talk somewhere else?" You asked as your eyes darted around, feeling the stares judging you.

"No, let's talk here and now." He replied firmly.

Everything was starting to spin and your breathing was getting harder and harder. Then, like a miracle with some price, your phone rang.

"It's my dad, I have to answer." You told to Spencer, still in a daze before moving away from him so you could answer.

He let out a frustrated sigh but let you go, not knowing you weren't coming back.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

"But it's too late now." He said quickly in the moment he seemed you were to say something.

Your eyes closed for a moment. Defeat was something you didn't want to get out of this meeting. "I'm really sorry Spencer, I've had a really bad fourteen years just tearing myself apart over a mistake I made when I was young and didn't know anything, I was only seventeen..."

He looked at you without compassion. "Very bad years?" He let out a humorless laugh. "You were engaged during those years while I had nothing." He emphasized his words. "I was the same age, so your only justification will be that nonsense?"

"Yes, I was engaged but that's over." You replied firmly. "However, I'm sorry and there's nothing I can do to make up for it because for you nothing will ever be enough!" You raised your voice again, not remembering that both had an audience, it was a surprise that they didn't kick you out of the restaurant. "Besides, that happened fourteen fucking years ago, get over it!"

"Get over it? Get over it is what I've been trying for more than a decade and just when I'm overtaking you, living in my present and finding a good girl you come back to my life like a damn storm to truncate everything I built." He also raised his voice, letting everything come out of his system. "Sometimes I wish I had never met you."

His words went to pulverize every one of your bones. "I'm really sorry..." Your voice was barely a whisper.

"If you're so sorry then just leave me alone for good." He demanded, his tone lowered this time but just as painful.

"If that's what you want..." You replied quietly, you would have liked to be the first to leave but it seemed like your body was still clinging to something that was never going to be.

Spencer paid the bill before leaving you with your words stuck in your throat.

Reid walked alone down the street, the cold brushing his skin and then he looked at the broken cobblestones on the ground...

Would there ever be anything in the world that didn't remind him of you?

What if there was a woman (other than you) that he could love?

Maeve was the answer.

Or so he wanted to believe, because he knew very well that saying he loved Maeve was too soon to be real.

He thought he did, he really did. But then the memories of you coming back to haunt him and he realized that saying he loved any woman wasn't you would be blasphemous.

Spencer could never, ever loved someone the way he loved you. The way he maybe still love you...

And that brings us to the last question.

What if he still love you or you still love him?

Maybe he should make a call...

[16wolke11]

CRESTFALLEN - Lando Norris

A/N Tuesday is for the tears

Summary: The reader struggles with the emotional rollercoaster of her relationship with Lando, who has been increasingly distant, only returning when it's convenient for him. After a painful confrontation, where the reader tells him she can't continue in a relationship where her needs are unfulfilled, and despite Lando's pleas, she decides to leave, acknowledging that it's time to let go and move on.

Words: 2276

Warnings: Sad Ending __________

When I woke up this morning, I just wanted to go back to sleep, avoiding what would happen today and ignoring all my responsibilities forever. Lando is returning home today, and what usually would be a day of happiness for me is now something I await with dread. Today is the day I am going to end this relationship if you can even call it that.

Every time Lando leaves for a race, appointments at the headquarters, or anything else, I am crossed out of his life. It wasn’t like this when we first started seeing each other, but it turned into this miserable thing over time. Even though I’ve seen improvements, I can no longer do this without hurting myself over and over again.

So when he texts me, ignoring the one I sent him while he was away, I make my way to his apartment. Standing in front of the door, I didn’t even want to knock, when I was usually so ecstatic to meet him again. I take a deep breath before finally lifting my hand, and it doesn’t take long before the door flies open to reveal a grinning Lando.

“Hey love,” he greets me, pulling me into the hallway and lifting my chin to press his lips to mine. As much as I would like to sigh, kiss him back, and just snuggle into his embrace, this is not what I’m here for.

“Stop, Lando,” I mutter against his lips and manage to get out of his grip, leaving him with a confused look.

“What’s wrong?” he asks, eyebrows furrowed. But he does take a step back, letting me get rid of my coat, and I need to take a deep breath before speaking up.

“We need to talk.”

“That doesn’t sound fun,” Lando pouts, and I can feel some anger rising in my chest.

"This is serious, okay?" I snap and get a weird look in return. This isn’t a great start for a conversation, but since it isn’t going to be a good one, it might be okay.

"I just missed you. Can you at least give me a proper hug?" Lando mumbles, and I sigh. It feels like being guilt-trapped, but for him, it must be strange. Usually, I’m the first one to hug and kiss him when he’s back. Things have just changed without him noticing.

“I don’t know why I keep doing this to myself,” I mutter to myself but do hug him, knowing that it’s probably the last time I’ll be close to him. Almost giving in to his familiar touch, I lean my head against his chest and wrap my arms around him. Lando did hear what I tried to only say to myself, and I can hear the confusion in his voice when he speaks up.

“What do you mean?”

I pull back from the hug and take a step back, trying to create some safe distance between us. “Me waiting for you to come back, waiting for this to become a real thing,” I begin, trying to find a starting point for this conversation that would make sense for Lando. He furrows his eyebrows, so I just keep rambling.

“Every time I think it might be different, you pull away again, leaving me behind like a convenient space-filler when you’re back home.” I try to stay strong, not wanting to cry at the beginning of the conversation, and calmly tell Lando my problem, but I know it’s going to be hard. Slowly, Lando’s eyes widen, and there’s concern on his face, like he’s slowly realizing which direction this conversation is going.

“It’s not like that. I don’t think you are…” He stutters, struggling to find his words, and ruffles his hands through his hair, messing it up slightly.

“Fuck, I never wanted to hurt you, you know that. Right?” Lando asks eyes fixated on me, and I lift one of my eyebrows at his question.

“Hurt me?” I ask him, thinking about what happened again and again during the last weeks. How my texts have been abandoned as soon as he left the country, and how he acted like nothing happened as soon as the plane touched down back here again.

“You’ve been doing that for months now,” I inform him, crossing my arms in front of my chest. A defensive move while trying to hold myself together and not fall apart.

“Acting like you care, and then just disappearing, acting like I never even existed.” I tell him what he did, at least from my perspective.

“I don’t know what to believe, what to think about you, and I need to figure out what you even want from me.” This is the reason for this conversation. Being with Lando was once my favourite thing, and now it’s something I fearfully look forward to. I can see that Lando gulps, fingers fiddling with each other. Good, at least he’s as nervous as I am about this topic.

“I don’t want to hurt you,” Lando admits, and I would love to believe him, but I just can’t. He desperately speaks up again, and I try to listen to his words.

“I don’t even know how to fix this, I try…” At this point, I already have to stop him.

“You try, really?” I scoff at his words because it felt like many things, but not like he tried to make this relationship work for us.

“It doesn’t feel like it. You come and go out of my life like I’m just a side character in your game of life. But I’m not.” There are many emotions on Lando’s face, trying to bubble up to the top, but I’m not finished. It’s finally time to tell him how I really feel about the whole thing we shouldn’t even call an “us.”

“I’m not here for you to just mess with me when it’s convenient and leave when it’s not.” My voice cracks, and I need to blink a couple of times, trying to get rid of the first tears prickling in my eyes. He uses me when he’s back home, and when he leaves, it’s like he pauses his life here and just continues playing when he’s interested in it again. But the world keeps spinning here, even though he isn’t here.

“That’s not my intention. Please, just listen.” Lando begs, trying to grab my wrist, holding onto me, but I snap my hand back, knowing I will fail to stay strong when his soft touch is on my skin. Lulling me back into the good times, but I need to keep a clear head now.

“I’ve listened to your excuses and promises for long enough. You’re no longer the person I fell for. You keep changing, and I don’t feel like I know you anymore.” I am no longer sounding as strong as I would like to, my voice rather thin, but I need to tell Lando how I felt during the last weeks. In the beginning, he was sweet, and I understood that his life was busy, but time passed, and he is no longer the one I fell in love with. The one who called me late at night just to talk for a bit, or even to keep each other company while watching a movie even though we were miles apart. Now he is the one who puts me away and just pulls me back out when it’s convenient for him.

“I never wanted that to happen,” Lando promises, now pacing up and down the room.

“I never wanted to hurt you.” He looks straight at me, and I try to listen to his words, maybe even to an explanation.

“I feel like I don’t even know how to be what you need.” Lando says, hesitating for a moment before continuing his speech. “You deserve someone who gives you everything, and I… I can’t do that.” He admits, and my heart aches. Even though I am angry at him, at the same time it hurts to see him broken. But for my own sanity, this needs to be done.

“Then why are you still here?” I ask him. When he is aware that he isn’t the right person for me, why didn’t he leave? Keeps torturing my feelings even though he tells me he knows better.

“I already gave you all of me, and you tell me it’s not enough? Is that the reason I’m not enough?” The tears flow now, but I don’t care. I could prepare myself for this conversation as much as I wanted, but some things just caught me off guard.

“It’s not about you not being enough. You are everything to me! But I don’t know how to let you be loved the way you deserve by me. And I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to.” Lando tells me, and my heart breaks at the sight of him. His slumped shoulders and the absolutely broken look in his eyes. It does take me only a few seconds to realize the meaning behind his words.

“You’re afraid of love.” I whisper, a realization which does make sense, but makes everything just more painful than it already is.

I take a deep breath before coming to another hard point on my list. “And I can’t keep waiting for you to see me, really see me, without hurting myself.” Trying to keep my head up, I look into Lando’s face, wanting to see his reaction and if he is at least as hurt by this as I am. “How long do you think I was supposed to wait for you to figure this out?” I ask him, my voice trembling, I hate the hurtful feeling in my chest, but I know I need to break it fully now to slowly heal it later. “How long am I supposed to act like it’s okay while you keep breaking my heart?”

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Lando’s voice breaks, and I need to look twice to realize that he is crying as well. I’ve never seen him so vulnerable, and as cruel as it sounds, it’s almost good for me to see him hurt. That he can experience these feelings and not just brush them off as it felt for me every time he left before.

“I just don’t know what to do anymore,” he tells me, and I believe him.

“I love you, I really do, but I’m terrified of losing you and pushing you away.” I need to close my eyes at his confessions, warmth flooding my broken heart, but I have to let my head take over before my heart falls again for him.

“You already did this. You already pushed me away. And I don’t know if I have the strength to keep doing this. I don’t know if I can keep loving you like this when you pull away every time it gets too real.” I know it’s cruel to give him crumbs like telling him about the love, but I try to be honest. Put all my feelings into this, and this includes the hurtful things as well.

“Please don’t leave me.” Lando pleads, and he takes my hand in a desperate grip.

“I need you, and I know I messed up. I know I hurt you, but I’m scared. Scared of ruining everything, and I swear I…” He sniffles softly and takes a couple of deep breaths in an attempt to calm himself down.

“I’ve tried too, you know.” I tell him and carefully start to remove his fingers from my hand. Fingers shaking, but I am determined to stay strong. “But it always felt like I was fighting this battle alone. I can’t be the only one trying anymore. I need someone who wants this, wants me.” I explain to him and take a step back, trying to bring back some distance between us.

“I want you, more than anything. I just need time.” Lando tells me, his fingers curling into his hoodie like he needs something to hold on to.

“I don’t have any time left. I can’t keep waiting for you to decide I’m worth it. Maybe I’m not, at least not for you.” This was something I thought about during Lando’s last trip. Maybe I am worthy of love, but not just of Lando’s.

“I just need to let go of the hope that one day everything will be perfect.” The little cry that comes with these words makes me sound even more miserable, but the truth has to be spoken. I need to let go of the perfect image of an “us” and try to go on with my life.

“Don’t say that.” Lando tells me, attempting again to grab my hand, and I let him, probably for the last time.

“Please don’t leave me.” His voice cracks, and I would like to hug him, tell him that everything is going to be okay, but that would be a lie.

“You are everything to me, and I will lose everything without you.” Lando pulls me closer, desperate, while we both just cry. He doesn’t stop me when I pull back my hands, his arms slumping down on the side of his body, and I can see the spirit breaking in his eyes when I step back.

“Maybe it’s already too late, Lando,” I whisper and turn around, finally leaving his apartment, knowing I wouldn’t be able to resist him if I stayed any longer. This end is a beginning, and outside the building, I am finally able to breathe again for the first time in forever.

[greenwitchfromthewoods]

nymph. [part 6] l General Marcus Acacius

Summary:  you have been with him for a long time, but he has never seen you. but everything has changed.

Warnings:  fluff, a little bit of smut and angst, wondering about a potential pregnancy, gods and mythology are treated in a simple way

A/N: I haven't written this series in a long time. My head has been occupied with other things, I guess… I'd like to finish it. A series I didn't plan on. Maybe some of you will stick with me to the end. Thank you for that.

I hope you will be gentle with me. your feedback is very important to me and I thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. 🖤 sorry for all the mistakes

nymph [masterlist]

"What do you mean? A wedding?"

Marcus kissed your hands and looked at you with a mixture of tenderness and concern in his eyes. As soon as he got home he was urgently called by Brutus and since then something was clearly worrying him. 

Although you asked, he dismissed you with answers that it was nothing, or that he would solve everything himself, that you shouldn't worry. However, things must have taken a turn for the worse, because that evening he asked you to talk.

It was a warm and quiet evening. The garden smelled of flowers, and you found a secluded place by the pond. It was there that the words about the wedding were said.

"Marcus, you know I don't need this." You said, squeezing his hands tighter. "I love you with all my heart, being by your side is enough for me."

"I know, my dear." he sighed "And I don't want anything more than every other day with you, but... There were some complications. Emperor Geta, and a few other senators, noticed you during the last gladiator fights." And he told you everything Brutus had told him. 

Your presence in the coliseum didn’t go unnoticed. Several senators caught sight of you, began to wonder where you were from and what connected you with General Acacius. At first they thought you were his lover, a slightly better-off slave. 

Marcus did not hide his indignation when he said these words to you. However, someone led them to the fact that you were free. And since you were free and had no official relations with General Acacius... Emperor Geta heard these rumors and even summoned Marcus to his place to ask about you.

"I didn’t like it." he muttered "He asked about you, and I felt my blood boil. I want you to be safe, my love, but this man will strive to have access to you. I don't know what made him come to us, it was some whim of fate. I was naive and stupid... I shouldn't have taken you to that place then."

You squeezed his hand tighter. "It's not your fault, Marcus. None of this is your fault." You said quietly. "I was deluding myself that we would live together away from all this, but it's your world that sets the rules for us. I don't want you to have problems because of me."

"Problems?" he snorted. "It's just the whims of a child who pretends to be the ruler of the world. He would be nothing if it weren't for me and the army." and then as if he caught himself on those words, he closed his eyes. "I'm sorry, you shouldn't have listened to this..."

"You know perfectly well that what you say is safe with me forever." You slid off the bench and sat down by his lap, resting your chin on his hands. "I'll do whatever it takes, whatever you expect of me. I'll be who you want me to be if it only protects you too."

His warm hand stroked your cheek, and you snuggled into it with pleasure. "I want you to be yourself, to be safe..." Marcus said "Marriage will allow me to protect you."

"So let's do it."

A faint smile appeared on his lips, he sighed quietly. "I don't know what I did that by the grace of the gods you appeared in my life."

"Or maybe it's a giggle of fate?" you mumbled, kissing his hand.

"I'll take it without batting an eyelid, if I can spend the rest of my life with you."

Word of General Acacius's impending wedding has spread throughout Rome, probably thanks to Brutus, who has mobilized all the friends he can trust. According to him, Marcus and you had been planning your wedding for a long time, and the promise of marriage was made before he returned to Rome.

"You know how it is! Acacius fought wars and conquered lands, marriage was not on his mind. But then the gods mocked him and sent him this woman. The boy fell in love!" Brutus said to everyone who asked him why the wedding was taking place in such a hurry. "There's no point in waiting! The descendants of his family should be born as soon as possible."

Aurelia, Brutus' wife, had taken care of everything at her husband's request, and you praised her for it, because you had no idea what was going on. You felt like an outsider when you listened to the orders she gave the servants, and when she asked you for your opinion, you weren't sure what to say. Marcus was the one who made the most important decisions, you trusted him.

Meanwhile, your thoughts were occupied by something else. Melitta. You hadn't had the opportunity to talk to her in private since that evening. Every time something interrupted you, or she was so overwhelmed with duties that she quickly left you. 

"You seem nervous." Marcus noticed on the morning before your wedding day. "Is something worrying you, my love?"

You shook your head, not wanting to burden him with your problems, because he carried a lot on his shoulders already. You overheard him telling Brutus about his unpleasant conversation with Geta, that only his service to Rome saved him from his wrath.

"He won't leave you alone until you marry that girl, Marcus." Brutus muttered. "You're like a son to me. You love her, I know that, so do what would have been inevitable anyway."

"This is not how I imagined it..." Marcus' voice was a bit resentful. "I wanted her to feel alive. To experience everything..."

The sound of footsteps and the creaking of a chair meant that Brutus sat down. "And you can still give her all of that. Your whole life ahead of you! You're both young, in love!"

Marcus snorted. "I don't want her to feel forced into this wedding!"

"Remember, I was the one who talked you into appearing with her in public. She would have sat hidden in this house forever for you. Children would have started to appear and what would you have done then, huh? Don't look at me like that! I was young and I know what goes on behind closed bedroom doors." Brutus chuckled, and you felt the heat pour into your chest and neck. 

You knew what he meant. All those closenesses with Marcus, at night and during the day, his hands never leaving your body, his cock buried deep inside you, the seed he left inside and which later flowed lazily down your thigh. You had lived in this world for hundreds of years, you had observed people and gods, you had seen pregnant women, you had been present at births and deaths. But what if?

A dark thought like a cloud covered your mind. You no longer heard what Brutus or Marcus were saying. Your feet led you to the garden where you sat under a spreading tree, lost in your dark thoughts.

Could you even give him children? Could your womb create a new life, a life that would be the sum of you and the man you loved so much? Minerva had made you human, but did that mean you were already completely like them, with all their flaws and good qualities? You didn't think about it that way. 

Ever since you stood before Marcus' eyes, life had swallowed you whole, but at that moment you really started to wonder. You were mortal, your veins were pumping blood. You remembered how you had injured yourself while doing some housework and only Melitta had bandaged your hand, because you were too surprised by the sight of blood. You remembered your first monthly bleeding, but what if it was just a whim of your body?

You knew that Marcus dreamed of children. He didn't have to say it, but you saw it in his eyes. He was also at the age when a man wanted to have his own offspring, someone to whom he could pass on his name and teach what he himself knew.

And what if you couldn't give it to him? What if you were just...

"My lady!" quick steps and calls distracted you, you hastily wiped your cheeks and stood up, revealing yourself to Melitta.

"I'm here." you said, trying to smile, and you allowed her to drag you into the preparations.

"You're nervous." Aurelia smiled and looked at you fondly. "I remember when my daughter got married, she was scared too. And I was too, although we're lucky and we marry those who are meant for us."

"Do you think so?"

Your voice must have sounded uncertain, because Aurelia stopped adjusting your white robe and carefully took your chin, lifting it so that you looked into her gentle eyes. 

"My child..." she said. "I've known Marcus since he was a child and I know that his heart belongs to you. His feelings are sincere, strong and true. The gods created you for each other, I'm sure of it."

"I don't want... Aurelia, I don't want Marcus to be ashamed of me. I know that I don't fit in this place..."

The older woman thought for a moment, then said. "You were at the temple yesterday, right?" you nodded "I'm old now, but I believe that we get what we're meant to. And you were meant to meet. You couldn't run away from it, child. Accept what the gods gave you and live by the side of the one you love. Because you love Marcus, right?"

"Oh, Aurelia!" your eyes filled with tears "I would do anything for him."

The woman smiled and stroked your cheek. "So let's thank the gods for this love."

The gold ring sparkled on the ring finger of your left hand, and you stared at it as if you couldn't believe that it was Marcus, dressed in white and gold, who had put it on. You could still feel the sweet taste of wine in your mouth, you could hear the buzz of the guests' conversations, but the only thing that mattered was the warm gaze of the man to whom you had given your life.

“What is it about this that I can’t take my eyes off?” you asked as he entered the bedroom and walked over to the bed.

"A promise." Marcus replied, tenderly stroking your cheek with his fingers. "A promise that we will always be together. That I place my life in your hands."

You knelt on the bed and took his face in your hands. Silver strands of hair mingled with dark ones, you saw small scars and wrinkles, you stroked his cheek covered with stubble. His face could be a model for butchers, and he was only yours.

"My life belongs to you." you said quietly, your lips brushing his "Forever."

"That's the most beautiful thing you could give me." he smiled.

His hands carefully slid your clothes down, revealing your naked body. No matter how many times he saw you naked, he always felt the same delight. And you felt the same. Your fingers deftly stripped him of his clothes, and soon his warm, sun-kissed body was on top of you. 

For a soldier, Marcus could be an incredibly gentle and tender lover. Devoted to you and what connected you. Adoring you as much as goddesses and gods. Sometimes you thought he sinned with such words, but over time you understood that only they could express what he truly felt.

"Even before I slid that ring onto your finger," he said, kissing your neck, "I already knew you were mine. You were mine before I first saw you. Before I even learned your name."

"What if I had never revealed myself to you?" you asked, sliding your fingers through his soft hair, he raised his lust-darkened eyes to you, "If I had never stood before you in mortal form?"

"I don't want to think about life... about this illusion of life that I would have to lead without you. I felt you, my love. And nothing and no one would be able to satisfy my hunger."

You kissed him, hard and deep. With all the strength of the feeling you had for him, with the promise of the life that you were now going to share in two. You wanted to give him everything - your love, your devotion, your loyalty, your womb and the children that could come of it. Or if they ever did. 

You lost yourself in his body, in the way he caressed and worshiped you. Bodies tangled together, him moving hard inside you, your sweet moans filling his ears. He left his seed so deep inside you that you could only hope that you would be able to give him what he so desired.

Your quiet footsteps were almost inaudible as you walked through the sleeping household. Marcus was fast asleep, unaware that you had left your bed, but you had to do it eventually. You pushed open the heavy door and entered the servants' part of the house. You quickly found Melitta's room and quietly slipped inside.

She wasn't asleep, but you didn't seem surprised. The sweet scent of herbs filled her room.

"I was expecting you." she said quietly. "What do you want to know, my lady?"

"How did a nymph become a slave? How did you end up in Marcus' house?" you asked, feeling your insides clench.

A lazy smile appeared on the girl's beautiful face. "You're afraid, aren't you? You're afraid that you'll end up like me... Broken, abandoned, without the one who promised you love forever."

You frowned. "Marcus, he would never..."

"He's a mere mortal." Melitta hissed, her eyes lighting up. "He's weak. His body is already slowly dying, and we gave up our immortality for people like that..." 

You approached her slowly. The smell of burning sage and other herbs filled your nostrils. "What did they do to you, sister?"

"Everything they promised not to do."

☆☆☆☆

Thank you for your time.

@ashleyfilm @gothcsz @littlenicpascal @missladym1981 @axshadows @psychoenergy @sabsunflowergirl @pedrofan @heckzprince @hard-candy-writing @mynameisbaby9 @94namkooksworld @bbyanarchist @picketniffler @tranquilty @psyched2b @jeewrites @tuquoquebrute @aotfantasmagorias @mynameismothra @kluvspedro @fefa-la-printcessa

[jessjad]

Please? I have a Dean Winchester x reader request. The idea I had was the reader coming back from trying to have a normal life after 2 years but being saved by Dean from her abusive ex-boyfriend, who was possessed by a demon. She calls him from a motel after escaping from the attack and almost getting killed.

Feel free to message me if you want to ask questions. I can't wait to read it.

A/N: So, this request from @ravenrose18 immediately sparked some ideas. And I was changing things over and over again. This could've gone so many ways and I think I got the best compromise out of it all. I hope, you like it, lovely! Thanks so much for sharing your request with me! 💜

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Word Count: 2948

Warnings: 18+ only!!! (Only for the violence), tension, abuse, cuts, wounds, angst, feelings.

My Masterlist

Voice from the past

Dean was nervous. Really nervous. He was driving toward Arkansas City. As Baby purred gently across the streets, AC/DC played softly on the radio. The almost four-hour journey from Lebanon seemed to never end, even though there was so much distance behind him. He was only about thirty minutes away to be exact, but it still felt like a long way away. But even if he had had to drive another four hours, he would have done it.

He kept thinking back to last week. The day he got a message that he hadn't really expected. It came from Y/N. Sam would now say 'the Y/N' and somehow he was right. Even though Dean wouldn't admit it, of course.

But Y/N had been a part of his life for a long time. She grew up with Bobby after he was the only one who saved her from the clutches of a werewolf. Unfortunately, her family wasn't so lucky. And since Dean and Sam were often at Bobby's and somehow grew up there themselves, they had become friends over the years.

Y/N had also grown up as a hunter and Dean had taught her to shoot at some point. She got better and better as time went on, becoming more fearless and brave. And Dean had to admit then and there that he had fallen in love. Feelings that still persist to this day.

That's exactly why he didn't like thinking back to his last conversation with her. It was almost two years ago when Y/N explained to him that she wanted to give up the hunter life. Dean hadn't really known how to react. Over the years they had solved cases together and traveled together, even if their paths had always diverged. But the fact that she wanted to quit because of a guy surprised the older Winchester.

Todd. His name was Todd. Urgh...was there a name that sounded even more wimpy? He wouldn't be surprised if he drank warm milk. Dean cleared his throat briefly at that thought. Okay, maybe the jealousy came out of him for a moment. And maybe also the disappointment that he simply couldn't find the heart to tell her that he wanted to keep her by his side. That she was important to him.

But well, maybe now he had a new opportunity to do so. Because according to her own statement, Todd was now a thing of the past and she wanted to go back to the hunter life. A second chance. And Dean was determined to use it too.

A moment later his cell phone rang and when he saw Y/N calling him, his heart beat a little faster. This was the first time Y/N actually called since she contacted him. He answered the call with a small grin.

"Hey, sweatheart. I'm not even twenty minutes away. I could stop and bring us some greasy burgers. What do you think?"

But he didn't get an immediate answer.

"Hello? Y/N?" he asked again and then he heard it.

Heavy breathing and a slight wince. He furrowed his brows and worry spread through him. But again it took a few seconds before he got an answer.

"Dean?" came faintly and with a pained undertone from the other side.

This was definitely not what he expected and he automatically stepped on the gas a little more.

"What happened?"

It stinked. This motel smelled. The worn out carpet, the musty bed linen, the tattered curtains. Even the wallpaper seemed to give off a foul smell. And yet Y/N was happy that she had somehow made it here. The hotel was abandoned, no longer in use, and she was lucky that the door to this room at the back of the building wasn't locked. Even if it had taken a lot of effort for her to even get in.

Now Y/N was crouched behind the bed in the corner and the adrenaline that had given her the strength and stamina to make it this far was slowly wearing off. And the more she calmed down, the more her body began to ache. The cuts on her arms and legs were the least of her problems. Her ankle was now throbbing quite badly and she knew she had several bruises.

Her heart was racing and she tried to calm down, but it wasn't that easy. Every time she tried to take a deep breath, her chest would rebel and her left shoulder would experience stabbing pain. She didn't have to question the fact that this was probably the worst injury.

Y/N carefully tried to pull the jacket off her shoulder when she noticed that she was losing more and more feeling in her left arm. She huffed and moaned slightly. The makeshift bandage that Y/N had pressed over the gaping wound was now soaked with blood and small red rivulets were making their way down her arm.

She was in pretty bad shape.

This was not how Y/N had imagined her return to hunter life. She slowly tried to sit up a little, but failed. With a dejected laugh, she briefly closed her eyes and tried to suppress the tears that wanted to make their way down her cheeks. When did everything go so wrong? She had just wanted to meet Dean to get up to speed. And now here she was, lying on the dirty floor of a disused motel, probably bleeding to death.

But then her memory got a little jolt. Dean! She had to call Dean. And so, with a blood-stained hand, she strained to fish her cell phone out of her back pocket. It still took three more attempts to dial his number.

As she listened to the beep, she realized that she was slowly losing consciousness. Y/N is finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate and stay awake. But as soon as she heard Dean's deep voice greeting her happily, it gave her another push.

But she still found it difficult to speak and her body seemed to ring like an alarm with every movement.

"I'm... not in Arkansas City... anymore." she replied almost breathlessly.

"Where are you?" came the question in a firm and determined voice.

"I'm... in an abandoned... motel outside... of Winfield." Y/N suppressed a painful groan. "Dean... I'm... hurt pretty bad."

There was a brief, almost unsettling silence before Dean spoke again.

"Okay, listen. Don't move and try to stay calm. I'll be right there. The only thing you have to do is stay awake. Alright? Don't fall asleep."

She agreed to this as best she could and after giving Dean the name and room number, they hung up.

The silence that followed was almost deafening. Y/N heard her pulse racing and the blood rushing in her ears. Still, she tried to stay awake. With her right hand she lightly pressed the wound on her left shoulder. The small pulses of pain that the pressure sent through her body helped her. That, and the thought of Dean. His green eyes, the mischievous smile, his dark voice.

Y/N had been in love with him for such a long time now. She couldn't even remember when it happened. But she had known that she had to free herself from him at some point. Because it was clear that he would never feel the same for her. All the women he spent the nights with, at one point it had been to much. And when Todd showed up in her life two years ago, it was almost like a sign.

But she didn't think that the exit and the distance from Dean would draw her back to him. She loved him and she wanted to at least try to win him over.

So she had talked to Todd. He had been nice from the start. He had been charming and always seemed as if there were no problems in the world that couldn't be solved somehow. He had embodied freedom and somehow Y/N had wanted that too. The hunter's life was hard and you had to renounce many things.

She had really liked him, but nothing more had come of it over time. And then over a year in, he started to change. He got more and more aggressiv, until he had hit her the first time. That was three monts ago. At first she had not known how to react to that, but the more the abuse happened, the more she knew she had to get away.

So she explained to him that she wanted to go back to her old life. She hadn't mentioned that that also meant Dean. Todd didn't take the decision too well. He was furious and she had feared that he would attack her. So she bolted to Arkansas City. But of course he found her there and his black eyes stared into hers as he stabbed the knife into her shoulder.

"How could... I be so stupid?" Y/N said to herself. “Why didn’t I... notice anything?”

Her head started to spin and every second felt like an hour. She slipped in and out of consciousness. She had to try harder and harder to stay awake. And just when she thought she could not do it anymore, the door busted open and she heared Dean calling her.

When Dean spotted Y/N behind the bed and knelt down in front of her, he had to swallow. She looked pale, weak and fragile. Not at all like the young, cheeky woman he remembered. But he just couldn't let that show. He carefully touched her lower leg and Y/N opened her eyes.

As soon as she saw Dean, her tears flowed and relief was written all over her face. It almost broke his heart because it had taken him a little longer to find the motel and the more time passed, the more she probably lost hope that he would find her in time.

"What happened? Can you move?" He immediately saw the blood trickling down her left arm and looked around for something he could use as a bandage.

"It was Todd. He followed me down to... Arkansas City. He... was possessed by a demon. I... I didn't notice." As she spoke, she tried to stand up, but she lacked the strength.

"Okay, slow down." Dean was immediately at her side, stabilizing her so she didn't collapse.

"It must have... happened when... he was out and about. The... demon wanted revenge. I killed... a friend... probably three years ago."

"Huh." Dean responded, but that wasn't rare at all. "Is he on your heels?"

Dean had taken off his shirt and balled it up and was pushing it onto her shoulder. They couldn't stay here long. Y/N had to go to a hospital.

"No. I... shot him with a devil's trap bullet." now Dean looked at her in surprise. "The weapon... you gave me."

Relief flooded his heart now. The gun had been his parting gift. You could never be sure. Still, he would send out a hunter bat signal so someone would check on Todd and make sure he was no longer a threat.

"Okay, Y/N, I'm going to pick you up now. Or do I have to do a once over?"

The young woman next to him laughed dryly. "No. My shoulder is messed up. My ankle is most likely busted. But other than that I'm fine."

Dean had to grin. There was a little glimpse of the Y/N he knew. But they didn't have much time left. He could see that she was losing her strength. So he carefully took her into his arms. Something she couldn't endure without a pained groan.

Soon she was safely seated in the front seat of the Impala. By now Dean had changed his fully drenched shirt with a spare towel he had in his trunk. He gritted his theeth, because it seemed that Y/N was pressing the towel down on her shoulder like she was holding on for dear life.

Dean slid behind the steering wheel and immediately drove off. It was oddly quiet in the car and his knuckles turned white. He glanzed over to Y/N every now and then to make sure that she was still awake. The hospital in Winfield was still a ways away, but he was determined to get there as quickly as possible.

Dean heared Y/N whimper everytime he drove over a bump on the street. He apologized everytime, too. But otherwise he did not know what to say. The silence almost killed him but time was not flying by fast enough. And then, Y/N decided to talk.

"Dean?" her weak voice bled over the engine of the Impala while she kept pressing the towel on her shoulder. "I have to tell you... something..."

"Don't speak now. You need all your energy that's left in you, sweetheart. Just stay awake, will you?"

Dean's knuckles once again became white while he was holding the steering wheel. He also increased the speed he was driving at. The hospital was not far away anymore, but she had lost a lot of blood by now and that was what really worried him.

"But I... have to tell... you." She said again, but her mind became foggy and she started to feel sleepy.

"Nothing can be that important right now. And when you're thinking of sayin' goodbye to me, quit it. Not gonna happen. So, hold on. We're almost there."

For a second he thought he'd won, buit then Y/N crushed his heart.

"I love you." her words rang in his ears, although he could not really believe it. But she then made sure her message came through. "I've been in love with you... for such as long time... now and... I just wanted you... to know that."

And with her last breath she closed her eyes, not being able to stay awake anymore. Dean's voice accompanied her into the darkness, calling out to her.

An annoying beep woke Y/N from her sleep, but waking up wasn't that easy. Her head was pounding a bit and a bright white light made it difficult for her to open her eyes. When she finally made it, she realized she was lying in a bed and was hooked up to monitors. They had made it to the hospital.

She looked around further and spotted Dean sleeping in a chair next to her bed. His head hung back a bit and his mouth was slightly open. It almost looked like he was drooling a little. How could such a strong man be so adorkably cute?

Suddenly he jumped up and wiped his mouth with the back of his hand. When he saw that Y/N had woken up, he got up and came over to her.

"Y/N! You're awake. How are you? Do you need anything?" Inwardly he wanted to take her hand in his, but he held back.

"No, no, I..." she tried to sit up a little, but it didn't really work.

Dean helped her position the headboard high enough to jer liking. He also gave her a glass of water that she didn't actually asked for. Nevertheless, she accepted it gratefully.

"So? How about me?" Y/N asked and Dean scratched the back of his neck lightly.

"Perhaps a doctor should explain this to you." he replied, already making his way to the door.

"Wait!" she stopped Dean. "Explain it to me. Please."

How could he say 'no' to that? So he came back to her and looked at her with a crooked smile.

"You have several cuts and bruises on your body. A bruised rib and your ankle is sprained. But that will probably sort itself out over time. Your shoulder did need surgery though. Something with the spina specu... spina... spinach something."

Y/N giggled, but put her hand over her mouth so Dean wouldn't see it as he continued. "But that too could be repaired and in a few months... you should be back to your old self."

"Well, that's what I call an exciting reunion." She joked, but Dean didn't seem too keen on it.

"I could have thought of better things than taking you to the hospital covered in blood and seriously injured."

And he was serious. It would be a lie if he said that seeing her like that didn't bother him. The thoughts he'd had about her when they'd left him sitting in the waiting room. When no doctor or nurse wanted to talk to him, update him. When his heart had been gripped by an iron hand that had almost stopped him from breathing.

Hopefully he would never have to go through this again.

"I'm sorry." said Y/N with a small voice and lowered her head.

Dean balled his hand to fists and turned fully to her. "I was really afraid for you. Especially when you suddenly stopped talking in the car."

And suddenly Y/N remembered the last thing she said to Dean. Her eyes widened and she didn't have to look up to know that the elephant in the room was now literally there. Nevertheless, she suddenly felt a little nervous and couldn't say anything.

"The doc said that you need to stay a couple more days in the hospital and after that... I'll take you with me to Lebanon." Now Y/N looked up again. "We need to talk."

"Dean, I..." she started, but when she saw that Dean walked up to her to take her hand in his, she felt silent again.

"I love you, too." He then finally said and Y/N looked up at him in surprise. "And if you let me, I'll never let you out of my sight again."

A/N: That’s it. It was really fun and I hope you liked it. 😊 Let me know what you think. Feedback is very much appreciated! 💜

Everything Taglist:

@lyarr24 @k-slla @nk1023 @iloveeveryoneyouramazing

[starryjkoo]

I honestly didn’t expect Jikook to talk about their military service much tbh. 2seok never really have, neither of them have been very active on social media, Jimin made it pretty clear he just wanted to go and get it over with and come back… so I’m just… really glad to hear that they managed to make some memories worth taking back with them, ones that they’re excited to (potentially) even share with us. I’m also not surprised but still endeared to learn that Jikook are still managing to find the humor in every situation.

The part of the convo where they’re laughing and talking about not being sure how much they can share because they’re scared of ARMYs running off just reminded me so much of AYS and how they talked about it. I could see Jikook on that couch in the last group live, laughing and playfully scolding Namjoon for spoiling the show, calling the elbow to Jimin’s face a gift for ARMYs, and telling us to look forward to it with all of that silly laughter and wide smiles. Last time they were talking about not being sure if they should share we learned it was because the whole first trip was centered around Jimin’s stomach issues 😭 I can only imagine what they’re talking about this time if it’s bad enough they think it could scare away ARMYs after we all watched that (but I also need to know).

But that little convo with Hobi, idk it was just nice to see that nothing has changed really (insert JM’s favorite LGO lyrics). It was so Jikook, silly and a little chaotic, warm and familiar, them laughing about the unfortunate or crazy things that happen to them, wanting to share their misadventures with us (and clearly with the other members, who knows how many times JM brought up that elbow story for example, he’s so funny).

I just really appreciate that part of their dynamic so much, the way they manage to find the humor in everything, turn a sucky situation into something to laugh about and look back on fondly. I’ve talked about that so much on my blog, but it’s seriously something I love so much about them and something I can’t highlight enough is just so valuable in life. No wonder they get along so well when they always manage to find a way to have fun wherever they’re at and to be able to lift each other up through laughter whenever something unfortunate happens. That kind of thing must be pretty invaluable in their current environment.

We already knew through their letters that things have not been easy at all for them in there. I’ve worried just a little. I know they’re alright, but it’s clearly just… emotionally so taxing, and their words, while having resolve and looking forward to the future, are also honest enough to share those vulnerabilities and uncertainties with us. So, it was just nice to hear their voices for one (first time we’re hearing JM since 2023 😭) and to hear that familiar silliness as short as it was, but also to know that amid all the struggles they’ve at least had a few spots of laughter, and that after all that has happened at least they’ve made some memories worth taking back with them. I’m glad that it seems they’ve both made friends too (or in Jimin’s case, adopted sons). I can’t wait to hear their stories if they decide to share any with us (and I’ll prepare myself because it sounds like I’ll need to) but I’m just happy that they’re hanging in there, that there’s not much longer left, and obviously that they have each other to lean on, confide in and make laugh every now and then too.

[lchufflepuffcorn]

Nesting head canon

Requested here by the 🥰anon!

Note : I've changed computer and now I don't know how this thing works. I'm so sorry if anything happens, I'll try to correct any mistake as soon as possible! Keep in mind that English is not my first language, so be kind if you want to correct me (or else😶‍🌫️).

Masterlist

Dragon!Hybrid masterlist

Warning : Minor DNI. Spicy content ahead, consider yourselves warned. Aemond : Mention of penetration (reader receiving) Laenor : Mention of penetration (Character receiving). Fingering (Baela Recieving). Dry-humping (Jacaerys doing it). Sub-ish Laenor cuz I can. No official gender references for the reader.

Aemond: 

Nesting™ for Aemond is not something that will change his way of acting toward you, not to the outsiders eyes, anyway. He’s pretty minimalistic in his approach. He’ll spend more time with you, touching your shoulders or the small of your back more often. Fleeting touches of his fingers brushing yours as you walk before wrapping your arms to his. If he even thinks that he saw you shiver from the cold, he will give you his jacket/cape/scarf/etc menacingly. He’s clingier, in the way that before, he could manage to have you roam all of the King’s Landing castle with only people at his booth giving him notes on your whereabouts. When he’s nesting, he has to have you next to him, or if he really cannot be with you, with Helaena. He doesn’t trust anyone else with you but his sister, his sister’s guards (because she’s the princess, and then the queen) and himself. 

He will rearrange the chambers and keep it cleaner than it already is during that period of time. The cushions would be comfortable, soft, the linens clean and fresh at all times. The room (especially the bedchamber) would smell of your favourite scent, the bed itself would have draps covering it from unwanted eyes, but shear enough so that the room outside would be visible if any kind of lights are lit. Aemond would also make sure that you are fed enough, going as far as to have snacks readily prepared for you next to the bed. 

I also see Aemond being softer with you when he’s nesting. 

Kisses shared as he moved inside of you, hands caressing your face, you chest, hips then legs, as if Aemond doesn’t know where to place his hands the most. The candlelights make his eyes shine with more adoration that you’ve seen from him than he’s had for weeks now. His hair, stuck in a braid you’ve treaded falling over his shoulder swinging with each wave made by the movements of your bodies intermingled together. His patch still ornating his face, he shivers and sighs when your lips leave his and trail all over his face. His hips still when you reach the dark patch over his maimed eye. 

“Qelos…” He breathes his pleas softly, one of his hands reaching for your face, putting a bit of distance between the two of you to examine your face. 

“I want to see you.” Your voice nearly makes him whine (weak, Vhagar growls at the voice in his mind). Aemond’s breath hitches when you make the two of you roll over to sit on his lap. He can feel himself piercing deeper into the warmth of your body, and the prince let his face fall in the crook of your neck, a soft moan of your name escaping him. 

Using his moment of inattention, you slip the patch covering his eye off of his head, leaving it on the pillow behind him. You kiss his scar, the corner of his eye, words of praise mingling with sighes of pleasure. Aemond could never imagine a more perfect being as you. 

Baela:

To Baela, nesting is the way to confirm and end a courtship. She knows that it will come back multiple times in her life and that it’s also used to achieve the catch of future hatchling within her. She could become pregnant outside of nesting season, but it’s easier when she is then when she’s not. And it’s a big deal to her. Everything needs to be perfect, she has to show you how good she would be to your hatchlings. Hence, she’ll pull all the stops. 

Baela would learn to crochet if you shivered, she’d hunt for a fur to add to your collection. Banquets would only serve food you like, your room would be cleaned and redecorated to fit the latest interest you’ve shone toward anything really. You would only find the softest material on the bed, and she would have upped the security of it with guards posting at the door and down the hall. She probably will also have hidden dagguers in many places, just in case. She's not clingy in public, but she cannot take her hands off of you in private, and she gets scary angry when someone interrupts your private session. 

You could never had been prepared to the dichotomy of Baela’s character as you were busying your fingers inside of her, pumping softly, kissing her shoulders as she writhed under you, moaning praises to you wantonly, and the snarl that echoed throught your bed chambers, freezing you in your position when her father (whom you hadn’t heard knock, if he had done so) entered your space. 

He didn’t seem bothered by the lack of cloathing he found you in, nor did he seem impressed by his eldest daughte’s fury. He spoke in valeryan, which you couldn’t understand, and promptly covered baela and yourself with the furs scattered on the bed. Baela spat something back to her father, dragon wings popping into existence, shielding you from further sight. Daemon rolled his eyes, added something that made your lover huff before he left, giving you a proud(?) look. 

“What was that about?” You asked once the door of the room was closed once more. Baela only sighed, plopping down on the soft pillows, her leathery wings sprawled on each side of her. 

“Father had been searching for us, the servants didn’t want to bother entering our room, they had an invitation to a banquet to announce. He thought he would be best if he told the news instead.” You nodded at her explanation. 

“And was it? Best, I mean.” 

Baela’s gaze fell on you, her eyes roaming over your naked body for a second before she shook her head. 

“Don’t worry your pretty head over it, my brave Rider. Dragons have respect for other dragons, and their mates.”

She rose from her lying position, trapping your face with her hands and kissing you, not letting you wonder about the meaning of her words much longer before starting your previous activities once more. 

Jace:

To Jace, nesting is all about your comfort. He becomes much more overbearing and worried about your wellbeing, even in moments that aren’t warranting it. If you didn’t spend much time apart to begin with, say goodbye to your alone time altogether at this point. 

He doesn’t let anyone else touch you, even your help, he’ll wash you. Hell, he’d spoon-feed if you’d let him (you’re not). And if he could justify it, you wouldn’t leave the bedchambers at all. There is no reason why Luke and/or Rhaena would need your attention more than he does!  

Jace’s nest would be one of the more chaotic ones, however. Sure, it’s made out of the nicest materials he could find, and all of your favourite things surrounding it, but it’s not in your bed, rather in the room that contains all of your clothes, behind the bed, where it’s more protected. It’s on the ground (but he’s made a soft surface so that it’s comfortable, he’s not an animal!!) and he freaks out everytime a servant tries to go inside the small space during his nesting period. 

“I still don’t understand why the bed is not acceptable.” You were muttering, neck thrown back as he placed a multitude of kisses on the skin of your neck, careful not to leave any (visible) marks there. A grumble left his chest, his dragon’s tail swapping the air around you 

“Safe.” He (or maybe it was Vermax) muttered against the skin of your neck, not even bothering to look up at you. You hummed, letting your hands tangle with his hair, eliciting a purr from him. 

“I know it’s safe, but from what? There’s about a thousand knights sworn to your mother present on the castle’s ground alone.” You teased. 

Unpleased by your words, Jace nipped at your shoulder, purring at the small sound of pleasure that made past your lips. He pressed his clothed body against yours, letting you feel his hardness as he rubbed himself on one of your legs. “Jewels need to be protected.” He breathed softly, teeth playing with the lobe of your ear. You hummed, contracting your leg to tease him. 

“Of course, darling.” It was no use to try and have him make sense right now.  

Laenor:

With Laenor it changed after the fiasco of his first nesting with you. But he always was very present and protective with you, making sure you were comfortable and had everything you would need at any point in reach. When he’s younger, he would muddle the courting rituals and the nesting instincts. 

Laenor was quite proud of this year’s nesting. He’d rearrange your shared bedroom so that the pile of comfortable and plushie material that usually served as a nest was in the corner, with  good sight on the door and an easy acces to the hidden door. He’d even had you scent (unknowingly) his favourite dress shirt. And now, he had you pounding into him, dripping sweat and puffing warm air into his neck and he purred incessantly. 

You’d willingly meet him inside of the nest, without asking questions and without having him coaxing you inside of it either. It was the first time it happened. You were becoming quite knowledgeable in dragonkin tendancies as time passed. A far cry from the child you were, unsure and hesitant about every action you did. 

“Ah… How come it’s with me you spent that time?” You asked, breath coming out short, his back arching as he felt your appendage hit his prostate repeatedly, a string of moans cutting his answering short. 

“You want to know now?” Laenor’s not sure if he should be insulted or preening at your curiosity. 

Your hands placed on his hips, you made him meet your mouvement sharply, and another pathetic endaring sound made it out of his lips. “Maybe not.” You chuckled, capturing his lips again with your own. 

Rhaena:

As her nesting instinct developed later in lifeshe might have been surprised by it. She is also pretty minimalistic with it, not understanding why she would do it anywhere else but in the bed (Jace does NOT give good advice.) She’s very conscious of your confort, and loves having your scents intermingle with eachother inside the nest. So be prepared to find clothes under the covers of your bed during this time period. 

I don’t think she’ll be very assertive or protective of you, per se, more so of the nest itself. It’s also not a reflex she has to protect it from the three little ones she’s taking care of for her aunt. Aegon III, Viserys and Joffrey have free passes when it comes to your nest, as she sees them as her own. 

“Rhaena.” 

Your grumbled echoed in the darkened bedroom of the essos manor you were currently invited to occupy,trying to wake the limp form cuddled at your back with an arm thrown haphazardly in her direction. The back of your hand hit something once, twice… three times before a groan answered your call. “What?” 

She nuzzled into your neck, both of you naked from your previous night, and with eyes groggily looking at the sad juvenile face pouting at you from outside the warm barrier of the bed, you tugged the covers closer to you. 

“There’s a child here.” 

Rhaena’s quick to raise her head from her pillow, looking over you to the white-haired little boy with fat tears threatening to fall from his eyes. She curse underher breath, exiting your bed and searching the ground for something -anything- to cover herself with. Rummaging throught the mess of linens you offert her a long shirt, unsure if it’s hers or yours, and uncaring at this point. You let her deal with Aegon, searching yourself for something that would make you more presentable before lying back down in your bed. 

It’s a good while after that Rhaena comes back in the bed, followed by the child, who settles between the two of you, content. She smile apologetically and you shrug. They might not be yours by blood, but they act like your children, so what if they spent time cuddling with you to find comfort? 

Taglist: @lady-dragon-rider or @lady-dragon-rider-2 (I don't know which one now..)

[bloodyminyard]

what the fuck is up with jeremy knox? what we know from tsc

keeps receipts for everything (writing the cash tip he gives on the receipt as well; reference to Jeremy having to "jump through hoops" to give Cat and Laila money for rent/groceries without his stepfather knowing)

has issues with his older brother Bryson (avoids confrontation with him "would rather leave his keys" and was "too tired and sore to put himself through that") (William The Butler helps Jere avoid him) (comparison to Jean? "if Jean was already asleep, bryson might be too" could be irrelevant tho)

there was a "scandal" Jeremy's freshman year at USC (his sister Annalise mentioning "end the way you started" in reference to jean's tranfer causing a scandal)

Annalise hates exy, but she used to go to all Jeremy's games in high school, but "never forgiven him for sticking with it"

"the fall banquet that broke their family in half"

he is/was in therapy (cat also says “the right therapist can be life changing, take jeremy for proof”, what was jere like before therapy?)

Jere does not fuck with his step-grandpa (annalise saying "what's grandpa think of this investment of yours?" and jere responding "he is not our grandfather")

annalise also states that Jeremy "destroyed the family"

Jeremy also walks annalise out and opens her car door for her? it may be just a nice Jeremy thing but it struck me as weird bc she’s being mean to him lol, like does Jeremy feel the need to wait on his sister for some reason? perhaps out of guilt?

he doesn't like being called "Knox"

weird about cops (avoids walking past them; "there was little to no chance he'd know them, and no reason they'd recognize him") (possibly means he's had interactions with cops before/regularly?)

secret sibling? we don’t know for sure how many siblings he has, my assumption is four, the two we know about (older brother Bryson, younger sister Annalise) and another unnamed brother that Cat mentions, she hesitates before saying three siblings, but then says “there’s bound to be a jerk or two once you pass four kids” (in reference to bryson) directly after she says he only has three siblings, cat ur not very good at this does he have three or more pick a side

Jeremy is "permanently on his stepfather's bad side" (his words)

he was uninvited from family dinners for a week bc of him dyeing his hair (generally points to him having to keep up certain appearances but i will lend that more to the whole “family of a politician” thing, but could be relevant)

so theories?

i’ve seen just general homophobia being a theory but to me it doesn’t fit with the vibes

with the keeping track of what he spends his money on i’ve also seen him possibly having a drug problem

the secret sibling is very interesting, are they dead? did jeremy have something to do with it? maybe secret twin????

i keep going back to annalise hating exy tho, what does exy have to do with it???????

[letmebeyourcrrsh]

can't just forget

bully!seungmin x reader

warnings: just a few scenes of teasing to evil jokes, some curse words

genre: enemies to lovers

summary: you and seungmin hate each other. since day one in college, he choose you to be his target. no matter how bad you try, you cant even escape him. until one day, something in him had changed…

every hallway at college felt like an obstacle course for you. and it wasn’t just because of the usual school drama or the random students judgy faces—it was seungmin. seungmin, with his cruel teasing, who made sure that every single moment you spent at college would ruin your day.

“Y/N, did you seriously wear that?” seungmin’s voice echoed through the hall as you walked past him. he was leaning against a locker, surrounded by his group of friends, all of them waiting for his next punchline. “you do know that no man would ever look at you, looking homeless like that, right? you look like you just rolled out of bed.”

laughter erupted from his group. it was always the same. it didn’t matter what you wore, how you looked, or how hard you worked on your assignments. seungmin found a way to poke fun at everything you did.

“shut up, seungmin,” you muttered, your eyes fixed ahead as you tried to escape his gaze.

but that only seemed to encourage him. “oh, come on, I’m just giving you some advice. maybe next time, you’ll at least try to look presentable.”

your heart pounded. you had gotten used to his teasing by now, used to the way he made you feel small.

you quickened your pace, walking faster, but as you turned the corner, you felt a hand grab your wrist, pulling you back.

 “are you in that much of a rush to get away from me?” seungmin’s voice was more teasing than usual, and his grip tightened, though not in a way that hurt.

you jerked your arm free. “let go of me. asshole.”

seungmin stared at you, the usual smirk on his face, but there was something different in his eyes. for a second, just a second, the teasing facade faltered, and you thought you saw something else—something softer, almost apologetic. but as quickly as it appeared, it was gone.

“fine, fine. no need to get all dramatic. brat.” he let go of your arm and leaned back against the lockers, watching you walk away. “don’t take everything so seriously, Y/N. It’s just a joke.”

a joke. that’s how he always framed it. as though the hurt you felt was just some silly thing to laugh off. but you didn’t laugh. you never did.

that night, you layed in bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to push the words seungmin had said earlier out of your head. why did his insults still sting? you hated how much they affected you, how they always seemed to worm their way into your thoughts. you hated him.

all these years you had been surviving him.. it started off as harmless jokes. he used to joke with everyone, every of his classmates, so back then you didn’t take his jokes serious. until these harmless jokes started to get more cruel… often pointing out your insecurities. and not only did you have to deal with his words, but sometimes even with his pranks.. either you walked into the classroom, just for a water bucket to fall on your head. or he even went so far, ruining your clothes with paint. sometimes made you trip here and there…

he just could never leave you alone. and you just cant understand… why you.

the next day, you were walking to your next class when you saw seungmin by the lockers, his back turned to you. You tried to sneak by without him noticing, but of course, he turned just as you passed, his eyes landing on you immediately.

“well, well, well, if it isn’t my favorite Y/N” seungmin smirked, stepping into your path. “why looking so serious? just not trying to make your life more miserable than it already is?”

you narrowed your eyes. “what’s your problem, seungmin?”

he tilted his head, his smirk fading slightly. “what’s my problem? I’m just calling you out, that’s all. am tired of the way you act. you literally should be happy I am wasting my time on you.”

you felt your temper rising, the words you had held back for so long threatening to spill. “if you’re so tired of me, why don’t you just leave me alone?”

“because you're always so boring. that attitude, it gets under my skin. makes me want to—”

before he could finish, you cut him off. “what is it you want, seungmin? what do you get from making my life a living hell?”

“just shut up, Y/N. I don’t have time for your whining. you’re always so dramatic.”

you stared at him, feeling both furious and confused. “I don’t get you, seungmin. I don’t get you at all.”

with that, you walked away, leaving him standing there.

a long time had passed. everyday it kept going as usual…seungmin teasing you, not leaving you alone, literally just being a pain in the ass.

until one day.. you couldn’t take it no more. there had just been to much of seungmin. so much, that you literally couldn’t leave your dorm no more. you had called in sick. and had stayed in you room like this for almost 2 weeks now. everything that had been learned in the day, was send to you by some classmates. you just studied in your room, really couldn’t step out to face seungmin no more.. until you couldn’t call in sick no more. and it

it was pure luck… you returned back to classes, and seungmin wasn’t even there today. Best day ever. however, later that afternoon, as you sat in the library trying to focus on your studies, you felt a familiar presence. you instinctively turned your head, only to find seungmin standing at the edge of the table, his gaze fixed on you.

“what do you want?” you asked, your voice icy.

seungmin hesitated, his lips parting as though he was about to say something, but the words caught in his throat. “I just wanted to apologize,” he finally mumbled.

you blinked in surprise, chuckled in disbelief and glared at him. must be another prank now. “you what?”

seungmin shifted uncomfortably on his feet. “I’ve been an idiot. I don’t know how else to say it.”

you stared at him, with even more hate now... “you’ve been hurting me for YEARS. and now you want to apologize? quick this shit. I aint playing along with another prank. just leave me alone seungmin! you keep ruining my life! I. hate. you.”

he looked at you, his eyes dark with something you couldn’t quite decipher. “when you disappeared- I really thought I went to far.. and- and i- I was worried, because you were just suddenly gone, and I didn’t know what happened- and I started to feel extremely weird because what if..-,” you interrupted him with a laugh. “ if you thought I would do something to myself just because you moron have nothing better to do, than to ruin my life, then you are wrong. “

 “I am sorry- I just don’t know how to deal with... this. with you. with how I feel.”

you groaned. “what are you talking about?!”

seungmin sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I didn’t mean to hurt you like that, but I... I like you, Y/N. and I know it sounds stupid. I’ve been making you miserable because I’m too afraid to admit it to myself. I thought it would be easier if I would be hurting you.. I thought it would just stop with the feelings- but when u disappeared. it drove me insane, knowing I am one who actually causes a lot of pain.”

 “wait, what?” you stammered. “you like me? seungmin.. do you even hear yourself!?”

seungmin nodded, his gaze dropping to the floor in embarrassment and guilt. “yeah. I know it sounds horrible, but I’ve been... so stupid. I’ve been so terrified of it, so I made you hate me. I thought if I made you mad enough, maybe I wouldn’t feel this way anymore.”

you stood there, stunned. you didn’t know what to say. you only wanted to scream at him for everything he’d put you through, for the pain he caused, for the way he always made you feel small.

 “I don’t know what to say,” you finally whispered. “you’ve been horrible to me, seungmin. really horrible. I don’t know how to just... forget all of that. I cant forgive you. cant just pretend everything is okey. I only want you to leave me alone. forever. I truly hate you seungmin. ”

this is the end of this part!! but dont worry. afterall this is enemies to lovers,

so if this story hits 100 notes then ill be writing a part 2!

other than that. hope you enjoyed this crazy story

[djarinova]

[01:34 am] - rafayel x f!reader

˗ˏ✎ synopsis:- rafayel is unable to stop himself from getting handsy as the two of you dance under the rainbow lights.

˗ˏcontent - reader + rafayel are drunk, needy!rafayel, reader is wearing a dress, rafayel is jealous, he pulls up your dress slightly in a crowd of people so he can feel your ass, public making out - divider by @/saradika

˗ˏwc - 1021

The strobing lights from above the crowd reflect enticingly off of your skin, the glistening beads of sweat allow your body to be littered in speckles of red and blue and purple. Rafayel's hands grip your hips, acting as the only way of communication between the two of you—the music is loud, the thumping from the speakers sends vibrations from your feet all the way to your head—and as the conductor of how the two of you dance. There's something so intoxicating about having you submit to every push and pull of his hands, knowing that you'll allow him to have control of the flow and rhythm of your body.

Rafayel bites his lip, the sudden rush of blood heading south leaves him feeling lightheaded. His mind is cloudy with an inspiring mix of euphoria and an almost uncomfortable level of hunger. He can feel the curves of your chest against his body, the rise and fall of your breathing, the heat radiating from your skin. At every point where the two of you meet Rafayel feels his skin tingle with anticipation. The electricity between you converges at these small, inconsequential places of contact, and each time you touch Rafayel he feels as though you're sending a bolt of lightning straight through his body—it thrums throughout him, into the tiniest corners of his very being. It makes him feel like a madman.

Surely you must be noticing this too?

You feel him squeeze your hips—if you had been any more sober it would have hurt because of how hard he squeezed—and you look up to find his eyes waiting for you. With a tilt of your head you question him, are you okay? But he shakes your concern off with a nod and a laugh, the darkness of which you couldn't possibly hope to hear over the music…

Rafayel doesn't think he'll ever get sick of the sight of you dancing. He watches as your concern bleeds back into joy, your eyes screw shut as his hands start to explore your figure. The dark red of your dress is absolutely maddening for Rafayel. The colour doesn't usually affect him like this, but this shade… it brings out such a primal feeling inside of him and, coupled with the number of drinks you've shared this evening and the amount of wandering eyes he's seen gawking at you, it's about to pounce on you like nothing you've ever experienced.

Rafayel's hands settle back on your hips, and for a brief second you think he's giving you a respite from all his needy touching. But then he draws you closer, a hand quickly appears at your jaw and with his index finger under your chin Rafayel tilts your head upwards. His other hand ventures south again and he starts massaging the flesh of your ass. A startled sound escapes you as he searches blindly for your bare skin beneath your dress, but his mouth is on yours before your mind is able to catch up with his actions.

You melt into the kiss, your hands slinking around his neck in search of something soft to hold on to, and the noise of the club seems to fade away completely. All you're able to focus on is him. The way he chases you, desperate and pleading, as you try to pull away for air. The way he whines into your mouth when you take his lower lip between your teeth. The way his hands are pushing you as close to his body as humanly possible, your hips flush against him, and when you feel something hard pressing against you through the thin material of your dress it's like a jolt of electricity passes into you. Your eyes flutter as they roll back into your head and as your hand begins to palm his hardness through his trousers Rafayel seems to lose his very last shred of composure.

He pulls away from you lightning fast, you notice a small trail of saliva sticking to his chin and smile. He steps around you to pull down the back of your dress and grabs you by the hand, pulling you towards the exit and out of the doors without so much as a word. You stumble, the fresh air hits you like a freight train and the alcohol suddenly feels much more intoxicating than before.

Rafayel catches you, somehow much more steady than you despite having the same number, if not more, of shots as you.

“Careful there little one,” he smirks, already pulling out his phone and getting a car to come pick you up.

He tells you it'll be 10 minutes. The words are whispered against your neck, his face finding itself a refuge between your ear and your collarbone. He nips at you, making you whine, the tender skin above your collarbone becomes almost raw with how long his mouth is attached to it. His teeth act as small talons to scratch and claw at you with, his tongue rolls over the delicate marks, a bruise already beginning to form on your skin from where it was sucked on so meticulously by the untamed artist.

He pulls away when the loudness of the club starts to infiltrate the quiet night air. Now that you can get a clear look at him the full blown lust in his eyes cannot be mistaken. It makes you feel giddy.

“You okay, sweet one?” He asks, the tips of his ears are bright and you can see the beginnings of his embarrassment starting to surface across his cheeks too.

“Y-yeah,” you splutter, “I-I'm okay.”

You smile as Rafayel reaches an arm over your shoulder. He pulls you against the side of his chest, and you can hear the thumping of his heart against your back when you reposition yourself. Standing back-to-chest the two of you wait on the curb for the car.

Rafayel is unable to stop his hands from wandering over your figure, but the night is beginning to get tired and the people are few and far between, so the overly touchy—and visibly drunk—couple go largely unnoticed.

[raavenb2619]

Koisenu Futari Episode 8 spoilers under the cut

The way the title card comes up and frames the shot, literally separating Sakuko and Takahashi.

"In other words, rather than doing a risky and fun job, he chose a life with a boring job where he can spend his days with you. That's how important living with you is to him." Kazu, that's sweet, but you're wrong : )

That was a really nice scene, Sakuko with her mom

XD wait I just realized, the conflict here could be fixed by "communicate or break up" XD

That's a nice montage of a scene from every episode. Celeste Summit vibes. (Or technically Core I guess)

Gods, I've never seen an aroace confession before, and that was so very Takahashi, they didn't compromise his character for any of it

"What you're saying is that we both will live separately." "Right." "Living separately means we'll become alone again. And our relation of 'Family (subject to change)' will vanish you know?" "It doesn't have to." Yes!!!!!!!!

Gods, the framing in this scene is Takahashi up and to the left, and Sakuko down and to the right, which is an inverse of the framing of the poster/title card, because she's helping him to grow for a change!

Gods the music in this scene is so good, and I have so much to say aaaaaaaaaa the swell under Sakuko is perfect

"Also, if I ever get tired of living here, we can think about it again together. You also try working in the Vegetable Kingdom. If it doesn't work out, you can quit. It's okay to not decide everything. We can put everything– ourselves, our family, as subject to change. When we put something in words, we get bounded by it. Just like us not wanting to get bound by the 'normal' defined by those around. The things we hold important and our ways of thinking keep changing continuously. So we can think about the best in that particular moment. If that time, our best is completely different, and things don't work out even after talking...then we don't need to force ourselves to remain as a family."

I needed to quote that without commentary because it's perfect. It's so perfect. It's. Fluidity and flexibility in how you view yourself and terms and the future, it's feelings first and labels later, it's people grow and change and we might grow apart, and if that happens we'll try to talk about it and make things work, but if we can't that's okay, we don't need to force ourselves to remain as a family.

I need to put that quote on my wall and watch this scene once a month

She's learned and grown and she's helping him to learn and grow, too. And it's not just generic growth, it's growth that's influenced by an aroace lens. It's perfect. It's perfect

"Thank you, Kazu-kun. For always trying to understand me. Thank you." "I am the kind of guy who grows up everyday. Isn't my absorbing power so awesome?" XDDDDDDD I literally laughed out loud, then rewound to type up that exchange, and the moment he said that line I laughed out loud again. Oh, you're a gem, Kazu.

hi you should definitely post your thoughts on each episode of Koisenu Futari (if you want to). cause there’s some character arcs and seeing how opinions of characters change is really fun!

-Interested aros in your area

You know what, I think I will. I didn't have anything to do for ASAW this year, but all of a sudden I do :)

Koisenu Futari Episode 1 spoilers under the cut

Sakuko eating food so she didn't have to talk about love, and then eating too much is just so so funny to me. Peak character design right there.

I can already tell that "Our castle" is a motif that will make me cry because I've glanced through @arotechno's posts about Koisenu Futari.

Sakuko finding Takahashi's blog is incredibly funny to me personally because I am an aroace blogger. (I mean it's also...I've been running this blog for a long time, huh. I haven't answered advice asks in a while, but like. My blog is a resource that I know has helped people figure out that they're aspec. And that's. Huh. There's something weird or surreal about that to me right now, I guess.)

Sakuko asking to be Takahashi's family when she just met him shows me that like, yeah this show really really does know what it's talking about. Because...yeah. (TV show: *is about being aroace*. Me, an aroace: *is shocked that this is so relatable*)

I also just, can't get over the fact that like. This is a real TV show. This is a real professionally made TV show, with actors and extras and lighting and cameras and soundtrack and mixing and cinematography and blocking and. Like, I've seen Bojack Horseman and stuff but like. This is a TV show about aromanticism and asexuality. And a lot of real actual people, real actual real life adults with jobs and stuff who got paid by working on this, worked on this. And the aspec stuff isn't just an incidental side character whose asexuality overshadows their aromanticism and whose identity is rarely relevant. This is a TV show specifically about being aroace. That's literally what it's about.

Has anyone done motivic analysis of the music? I wonder if there's anything interesting. I notice the piano at the very start of Ep 1 came back later in Ep 1. Obligatory https://raavenb2619.wordpress.com/2021/04/28/how-frozen-and-frozen-iis-music-codes-elsa-as-aroace/

[juniemunie]

[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]

Hitting a lil' too close to home?