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@trainto1925 and now u got ME thinkin!!!
wondering when eiden would have gotten good enough at plushie making to create his entire harem in doll form. ...possibly around the time blade showed up. eiden got a lot of practice making thousands of Eiden Plushies as gifts 🤣
imagining how eiden starts to do a lot of impromptu "visualisation" exercises when blade joins the roster
BLADE: but why was lil yakumo embarrassed when i showed garugaru the box in front of-- EIDEN: (sighing goodnaturedly) ok, say..um *grabs the nearest two items* pretend this cup is garu, and this spoon is yakumo---
after some repetition, eiden wonders if blade will understand better if he just has dolls representing everyone thus begins the plushie brigade
#i will assume that eiden makes the dolls in chronological order of meeting#so yakumo is one of his first dolls? maybe the dante doll is actually BETTER than the yakudoll technique-wise?#by the time dante joins the party#eiden has practised many diff forms of clan member so the creation is more streamlined#but also if we consider the millions of eiden dolls he's already made for blade 😅...#then all his lil clan members are around the same quality regardless of when they were made#eiden respectfully putting his best into every doll. trying to capture the unique charm of each person...#BUT THE GREAT THING ABOUT BLADE IS THAT HE CAN INTERRUPT AT ANY MOMENT#so imagine. that blade catches eiden making the clan member dolls#and he asks why?? and eiden explains that it might be easier for blade to visualise interactions with actual clan member plushies#than randomly assigned objects that happen to be lying around#of course blade gets excited#and he wants to help!! he wants to help Darling make cute little versions of his fave people!!!!#sooooooooo blade will get to make plushies of the clan members eiden hasn't made yet#so it is fully within the realm of possibility#that the itty bitty clan committee comprises adorable perfect lil chibis resembling their namesakes#AND Darling-statue-esque avatars of only the faintest resemblance#imagine that eiden (ever the speedy worker) actually created every clan member up to blade#before blade decides to join the assembly line#so Lord Jackass is the only blade-made doll of the collection (at least until rei joins)#dante could walk in on eiden trying to explain a complicated group scenario to blade (with the plushies of course)#and when he sees how every lil guy is normal except for HIS? ohhhhhhhhhhhohohohohohoho#i'm having a hearty chyuckle about it as we speak#replies
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#20.8 Spar
"Are you up for a spar, Viole?" Novick asked after they finished snacking on the garlic bread. He was always competitive, especially when he was introduced to new people. However, Dan and Gyetang also looked excited to join. From what Agni caught, they were curious as to how talented Viole could be to have earned his status as a slayer candidate, which was understandable.
Still, Agni huffed in amusement. His team still chose to train even though he had called today off. Though Agni wasn't against it. He felt like it'd be good for both him and Grace, since exercise always took their minds off things. Bam seemed a little reluctant, but he went along with it, especially after Grace said it'd be a good bonding experience.
Everyone moved to the training area and they made a quick bracket match. Grace reminded Agni not to overexert himself in this spar, even though Agni insisted that he was fine. But he understood why Grace was worried, since he would be too if Grace were in his place.
The first round was Dan against Gyetang. Both of them had improved a little bit from the last time Agni watched their spar. Gyetang was able to read Dan's movement the moment the spar began, and act accordingly to counter his attack. Though in the end Dan still gained the upper hand once he was able to render Gyetang's fuuma shuriken useless.
The second round was Grace against Agni, which would have ended fairly quickly if Grace used his reverse flow control. But since he didn't, he and Grace had shinsu enhanced martial art combat instead. Agni could tell that Grace was avoiding hitting his leg. In a real fight, Agni would use that to his advantage, but on this occasion he appreciated Grace's thoughtfulness. However, none of them went easy with the other, so they dragged out the fight until Agni ran out of stamina.
The third round was Bam against Novick. Despite it being the first match, Novick went all out on Bam by using his ultimate moves as a start. Still, Bam kept up with him, though he kept on the defensive. It wasn't until Novick and Grace encouraged Bam to attack that things finally got more interesting. Novick was slowly pushed onto the defensive, though Agni knew that Bam was still holding back. However, all of Novick's attempts at challenging Grace seemed to pay off, and Agni could see that he was still able to keep up. However, Bam's attack pattern was different from Grace, and one of his bangs took Novick off guard, allowing Bam to subdue him. Even though Novick was clearly still okay enough to keep going and break himself free from Bam, he raised his hand in surrender and ended the round.
Since this spar was for the team to get to know Bam, and everyone knew that Grace was the strongest, the fourth round was voted to be Bam against Dan. Having seen the first round, Bam was able to predict Dan's attack. However, that didn't mean that Bam was prepared to go against Dan’s speed. Bam tried to use reverse flow control on him, but Dan was too slippery to get caught in it. He was used to having to deal with Grace's, so he was able to read Bam's aim. Dan didn't waste time and successfully pinned Bam down to the ground the moment Bam let his guard down. However, it seemed to trigger a fight response from Bam, and he summoned a bang behind Dan. Agni intervened by creating a barrier to null the shot which could cause serious injury, but the bang had already been snuffed out before it exploded. Agni looked at Grace who exhaled in relief with his hand half raised, before calling the match over. Everyone else was too stunned by the outcome until Dan offered a hand and pulled Bam up to his feet. Then Gyetang and Novick finally cheered and congratulated them both.
As they waited for Bam to cool down after two matches in a row, Novick challenged Agni to a spar. It was understandable, since Agni usually was too busy to join their afternoon routine. However, Agni was still worn out from his previous match and a little under the weather, so he aimed to end this one as soon as possible, especially because Novick was a tank which would put Agni at a disadvantage if the match was dragged out. As soon as the match began, Agni activated his lighthouse flow control to stop Novick and teleported behind him. He froze Novick's limbs before he was able to reinforce himself with shinsu, and pointed a knife at his neck.
"Not going easy on me, huh?" Novick chuckled as he admitted defeat.
Agni melted the ice on Novick's limbs and stepped away to the spectator seats. "I would be at a disadvantage, otherwise."
Since it ended too fast, Novick challenged Dan next. Compared to what he had with Bam and Agni, he went relatively easy on Dan. But in the end, Novick still came out as the winner since Dan was built for agility, not power.
As if saving the best for last, Novick finally challenged Grace for a spar. It went as it usually would. Grace was just humoring Novick, but at least he managed to make it believable and kept Novick on his toes. Agni had seen what Grace was actually capable of, after all. Practicing with them like this was actually wasting potential on Grace's part. He would grow stronger quicker if he faced an opponent that was on his level or above. But Grace looked like he was having fun, so who was Agni to ruin it?
The last match was Bam against Grace, which everyone had been looking forward to. Grace assured Bam that he could go all out with him, which prompted Agni to reinforce the barrier that surrounded the training area even more than usual. At first, neither of them made any move to attack, but it was interesting to see the differences in their mirrored stances.
"You can have the first move," Grace taunted.
Bam summoned two bangs and released them toward Grace. They were easily blocked.
"Is that all? I know that you can do better."
Agni thought it was harsh of Grace to say that. A regular on this floor that could control two powerful bangs was already considered a prodigy. But Agni understood the frustration. He himself had been far harsher on his younger self. Their teams were far behind, and would not survive had they lived during wartime. It was a scary thought.
Grace decided to step forward, and Bam switched to his reverse flow control stance. However, nothing happened as Grace kept on closing their distance. Bam frowned and ran forward, pressing his palm in front of Grace's chest. Grace didn't move away from the touch, looking at Bam with anticipation.
"Go on," Grace said when Bam hesitated a moment too long.
Bam bit his lip, before releasing his flare wave explosion. Grace's eyebrows twitched in pain. Even though Agni could feel the wave, it was not as destructive as he had predicted, even with his lowered standards.
"One more time, but you have to give it your all." Grace very rarely used his strict voice, but when he did, it was a clear warning that he was displeased. "If you refuse to, then I will start to go on the offensive."
Bam inhaled sharply and forced himself to release another flare wave explosion that was finally close to the level that Agni predicted Bam could do. Grace covered his mouth and coughed, and Agni saw a glimpse of red. However, Agni kept firm on his seat, since Grace was smiling at Bam.
"That's right, don't hold back." Grace jumped back to create some distance and got in his defensive stance again.
Bam got more serious after that, and his bangs were formed with more concentration. Grace carefully landed a few blows and slowly shifted to offense, while still creating some openings for Bam to take advantage of. Their exchanged blows got fiercer, and it was finally clear that they were having fun.
Not too long after, Bam was starting to run low on stamina, but at one point he managed to sneak behind Grace and hit him with another flare wave explosion. However, Grace saw it coming, so he repelled some of the waves to decrease the damage that he took. Unfortunately, it fired back at Bam and injured his arm. They decided to stop the match then, as Bam seemed really close to passing out. Grace held Bam's shoulders to steady him on his wobbly feet, and gently lowered him so they both sat down on the floor. Agni approached them just in case his help was needed.
"Are you okay?" Grace asked, getting more frantic when Bam suddenly looked like he was having a heart attack. Agni froze in his steps when a red exoskeleton grew and enveloped Bam, healing his injured arm. But Grace seemed less surprised and just comforted Bam until the exoskeleton disappeared.
Agni squatted down next to them and whispered to Grace, "What the heck was that?!"
"Blue Thryssa, incomplete form." Grace looked thoughtfully at Bam, who was staring back at Grace with a confused and scared look. "Your wound healed now, see? It's fine."
"Are you sure?" Bam rubbed his healed arm. He winced, "It's, uh…talking to me?"
"Hmm, maybe I can help you understand it." Grace sat down cross-legged and got in his meditative state, placing his palm on Bam's back.
Everyone else had come closer around them as well, curious about what was happening. A moment later, a transparent blue horn started to form on Grace and Bam's left temple. It surprised Agni because he thought Grace had lost the powers that he had absorbed when they traveled back in time.
When Grace opened his eyes, he gave Agni a look that said they would talk about it later. Bam came back to his senses a moment later. Dan and Gyetang could no longer contain their curiosity and began asking Bam and Grace questions, but the topic soon drifted to more general conversation because Bam was just as lost as they were. Agni called the sparring session over and Dan went to prepare dinner. Bam and Gyetang joined him in the kitchen, and the sight of them getting along together was heartwarming.
Agni took a seat in the cafeteria, and Grace followed to sit next to him. Agni released the fish from his lighthouse bowl to roam around the kitchen, while Grace exhaled and stretched his arms. All the bruises on his skin were almost healed already.
"Well…?" Agni prompted Grace to start talking.
"Hm." Grace leaned back on his chair and rubbed the back of his neck, "After seeing what Bam is capable of, it made me think about how far I've come."
There was sadness in those golden eyes that tugged at Agni's heartstrings. Both of them had been broken so many times that no amount of fixing could bring both of them to what they used to be. Velt came and swam between them, nuzzling onto Grace's arm before settling on Agni's side. Her company was appreciated, and Agni gave her a few pats. Grace smiled as he watched them.
"About the Blue Thryssa though…" Grace stopped himself when Novick approached them and took a seat nearby.
Agni and Grace shared a quick glance. Honestly, Agni would prefer to talk in private with Grace when they brought up their time travel stuff, but it wasn't like they were actively trying to hide it either. Novick also didn't seem to mind, as his attention was more at whatever was happening in the kitchen.
Grace shrugged and continued their conversation, "It was like…I felt my own Thryssa resonate, and it said it doesn't have any recollection since, you know. It felt like I had just woken it up."
Agni hummed thoughtfully, "Could it be that you didn't actually lose them?"
"Maybe? I couldn't feel any others though." Grace tried to do something with his left hand, then frowned when nothing happened. "I can't transform it either."
"Oh, hm." If Agni recalled, the transformation was when they were with the beastkin. "I guess you have to get yourself or Bam to get it from Doom."
"I thought the same."
"Well then, guess I will have to update our plan soon."
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#quite a long read for this update. i wonder how many just skimmed past hahah#I had tried to ref canon but i kind of went down reference-searching rabbit hole and decided that i will just wing the rest based on memory#so i expect lots of inaccuracy on their abilities. tho gyetang's is 99.9% my headcanon lol#ok so i have a confession. on season 1 i wrote that grace didn't have his power that he had absorbed/collected#And he reasoned it bc that means there will be duplicates of the weapons/entities. while there is literally a copy of himself running about#the chpt was posted so early when i had yet thought about having this series this far. by the time i noticed the hole. we have been to s2#so in order to fix that. i come up with this solution. which is to sync them up in terms of the powers bam will/had absorbed#and i think it's quite genius of me 😌 bc grace can just say he has a power to copy without taking the real source#for the blue thryssa power though... I decided that it can only speed up healing process since its purpose is mainly for defense. not heal#tower of god#tog#two sides of the same coin fic#my fic#bam#baam#25th baam#25th bam#the 25th baam#the 25th bam#jue viole grace#khun#koon#khun a.a#khun aguero agnis#khunbam#koonbaam#bamxkhun#edin dan#novick#gyetang
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21. Friends hear through hotel walls? (Arabia and Ivy) for the WIP Ask Game !!!!!!!!!
Send me an ask from my WIP List and I'll post a little snippet or tell you something about it!
Ack sorry in advance this one is... Not Fun??? *hides under my desk* idk where this idea came from but I ended up writing it as a way to feel more comfortable writing Arabia/Ivy (there's nothing quite like putting character's in a crisis to get to know them better I guess??). Anyways, idk if I'm gonna post this one because everyone will banish me to angst jail and attack me with hammers and mean comments haha. But uh, here you go?? Enjoy???? (abuse tw)
Arabella curls up into a ball with her back against the headboard, trying to make herself as small as possible, trying to get away from the awful sounds coming from the next room, now entirely unmistakable as Satine’s boyfriend hitting her while she begs for him to stop. “You’re okay, Bella,” Ivy murmurs, momentarily covering the receiver with one hand while she rubs Arabella’s leg with the other. “They’re on the way. They’ll be here in a few minutes. It’s going to be okay.” Arabella shakes her head; she can’t seem to stop trembling, but it feels like it’s happening to someone else. Something glass shatters next door and Satine sobs and Arabella thinks she’s going to be sick right here on the mattress. Nothing about this is okay. She wants to lean closer to her girlfriend but she can’t seem to make herself move; besides, everything inside her is screaming at her to get away from everyone. Arabella covers her ears and squeezes her eyes shut tight, trying to block out the sound of her friend’s suffering, feeling guilty all the while that she has this option. There’s another loud thump from next door and Satine’s voice cuts off mid-scream. Ivy drops the receiver, her hand stilling on Arabella’s knee. For a moment neither of them moves or even dares to breathe, both imagining the worst. It turns out there is a more horrible noise than her friend’s cries for help, and that’s them going abruptly, horrifically, bone-chillingly silent.
#the few good things to come out of this are i think im getting more comfortable with writing them??#idk i feel like if you can write them experiencing their worst. their best comes easily??#Character Study. or something#am i any good at capturing arabia's voice??? UNKNOWN. but i sure am. trying my best. im doing Something idk#or her inner monologue at least since she shuts down and doesnt speak in this snippet#i also have decided that ivy calls arabella 'bella' and i think that is Very Cute#does that make up for the angst???? (probably not)#like everything else ive posted today this is. entirely unedited#sorry if you thought this was gonna be FUN and instead you got gifted THE HORRORS#i guess what happened here is we talked about how arabia hates loud noises and shuts down when people yell#and likely has her own history of mistreatment and/or abuse#and i was thinking about the dynamics of arabia who has escaped her abuser x satine who hasnt yet and how that would play out#also what would happen if arabia witnessed it but she couldnt get to satine in order to help?#abuse tw#thank you for the ask!!#im sorry? or youre welcome?? idk at this point.....#pls dont hate me#my fic
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angel neil is being a straight up dick to me rn >:c
arson neil and mafia front are my favorite kids now
#>:((((((((((#straight up annoying!!! i can't decide how this scene is supposed to go#i have a couple Ideas but neither of them is great. maybe i should just Skip the whole thing.#like Boom it's the next day or smth :') i didn't wanna do that but alas it's looking like i might#anywho surprisingly arson neil is behaving this week. i actually wrote all the parts we need for this week the other day!#(but i answer in order so you know... you haven't seen em yet)#but anyway! angy :(#diaerie
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#apologizing for my absence YET AGAIN#i've been so scatterbrained#and i decided to start a thing for september#where i write one short screenplay per day#in order to just like... practice and know how to get ideas flowing#which will come in handy when my friends and i do a competition at the end of the month#where we have to write film and edit a short film in just 36 hours#but i do have some drafts i'm hoping to get to#i want to write here#and plot with characters#i have an OC i'm hoping to finally bring onto the blog officially#anyway i hope everyone has been having a lovely time <3
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being a busy ass student with student journalism gigs on one hand and comm academic shit on the other is very interesting because with the jam-packed life I live I only really get to breathe at like late lAAATE night when no one can bother me about my responsibilities other than myself. that being said that's also when creative brain goes into overdrive and now misfits finally has the final draft of its opening number woo
#so heres the thing kasi the opening number of that damn project hAS BEEN THE HARDEST TO WRITE#i believe at this point there had been morethan 10 drafts gjdjd because like heres the thing with that number specifically#misfits is a fourth wall breaky show within a show and the 5 narrators (and 1 misfit which i'll get to in a bit) knowingly perform#to appease the audience. hence the opening number throughout the years has reflected that - a performance that breaks the barrier between#audience and stage. even when misfits wasnt a show withjn a show concept this had always been the general treatment so that the audience#actually GETS whats happening - but i always come to changing it because well i also wanted to add foreshadowing factors: somehing that#suggests that the show isn't actually all that it seems. previous drafts had this show through the typical Tagalog - Real#and English - Scripted element in the show - language being used to determine authenticity. however that begs the question of how to#properly utilize the Misfits in the opening number - given that two of them dont know about the Show while the other is confused#and then at 2 am i remembered Hermes from Hadestown and boop a lightning bulb#instead of opting for opening numbers that had hints of sabotage or theatrical malfunctions that suggests that the show is Not What It Seems#i thought - why not have it 'malfunction' at the start and have it introduce the wrong character first 5 minutes before the Narrators come#so basically after the Producers (represented through um P.A. voices smth like that) welcome everyone - what is supposed to be the#introduction of the Narrators first ends up as the introduction of the 3rd Misfit (Zeke - 18 - nb) who appears genuinely lost#they appear genuinely in distress though they keep themselves composed at the realization that they are facing an Audience#and they Know this because he was formerly a Narrator as well - though at this point in the story nobody (bar one) knows that#they decide to take their time in chatting with the audience while charming them using their old Narrator tactics in order to get a grip on#whats going on - being a first step towards how involved the audience will be in the story as Zeke then goes to question them outwardly on#the morals of the story they expect and whether it is ethical to have children forcibly conform to religion in the first place#but they do so in an entertaining Bo Burnham manner - a way that doesnt catch people off guard until They Want To - because ayun he#plays by the rules of the show#this doesnt seem like the 'opening number' yet does it but im getting there fjd because once they sense that the narrators will be on stage#as a memento they teach them to sing a melody that will serve as Zeke's motif - something that will eventually scare the lead Narrator and#the Producers - because whenever the motif is sung it means that someone has Broken a Significant Part of the show#especially since the Motif was um lets say its from a now defunct show the Producers and Zeke and the Lead Narrator used to have#that melody will then be subtly present throughout the entire opening number of the Narrators - which will then be played straight#but with the Misfits make their pre-official-introduction appearances by forming the bridge of the opener using the Motif#thats when we learn of the show being compromised from the very start - especially with the lyrics of the motif expressing doubt in faith#personal shit (ran out of tags whoops but um yea basically its Have The Audience Have A Hint to Whats Going On Through Recognizable Motifs)#(also the motif the audience learns is a melody - Zeke (and the lead narrator) changes the lyrics as they go) (also sorry for the ramble)
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Just got back home from the hospital
#my mom is a diabetic and her toe (just one toe) was itching severely for an entire day so we went to the emergency room around 5 in the#morning#it’s 11:00 rn bro#they took forever to see her man it shouldn’t have taken this long I hate roseland hospital 🗣️🗣️🗣️!!!#i remember getting a taxi back home from the hospital back when Uber and Lyft weren’t popular yet because of a toe fracture#and they took forever to see me then#the taxi driver was like ‘if I was on my death bed I still wouldn’t want to be taken to roseland’#you’ll be sitting in the lobby for like 6 hours until they call your name and shit#and mom mom still didn’t get to get her medicine#the dude at the pharmacy told us to wait an hr#I went up there to check up on the progress about 30 min in and that was when he’d#decided to tell us that they didn’t have the medicine and that it needed to be ordered 😵💫#went to a pharmacy across the street and same thing#my mom is try to call Walgreens and cvs to see if she’ll have any luck#I feel so bad for her#rambling
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how deal with taidan
#^ crying over saki for the second night in a row#i am Not Okay about the fact her taidan is exactly a year after her pb footage aired on sky stage#bc that was the very last thing where i was like ok yeah maybe saki IS my second fave of all time#feels weird to call her my second fave#shes like basically on par w aasa 😭 idk how else to word itjfhd#idk not the point i am just emotional and sad and will miss her dearly#but also wishing her luck in whatever she decides to do next whether that be in the public eye or not#also just feel so sad about how busy ive been recently 😭😭#was planning on going back and watching all her shinkos and leads that i havent watched yet before the 13th but uni hit me like a truck#and i have not have time 😔#have not had *#sorry if you are reading this 🙏 it is not coherent 🙏🙏 fjdhdjd#idk i was torn up enough over kiwa and this is about to be 4000x worse sofhdhdjd#did watch every sakigumi show in order a while ago w my gf and that was nice at least#idk man im excited for aasas run im sure itll be great im just so not ready to say bye to sakigumi#god if youd have told me when i first got into zuka i would be this torn up over saki leaving i would not have believed you#but here we are#at no point was i expecting to get This Attached to saki but it just kind of happened#aasas fault whatever#fjhdjdhd#sorry none of fhis is coherent i do not know how to organise or articulate my thoughts#idk i love s4kiaasa so much#getting to watch them together both on and off stage for the last two and a half years ish since i got into zuka has meant so much to me#i hope they both continue to thrive and i look forward to seeing what they do next
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Just know there's a world where I have the free time and brain capacity to make the true "all dnp content in chronological order" playlist or at least singular, centralized list with links that I yearn for but unfortunately that is not the world we're living in 😔
#if anyone out there is like hey alexis remember when you were doing the world's slowest watch through of all their content what happened#the answer is partly time/energy#but also partly that i had a compulsive desire to actually watch EVERYTHING in exact time order#and that started to require flipping back and forth bw several spreadsheets and yt playlists#and i just dont have it in me my brain decided that was too much and too annoying at this time#(and god forbid my very cool and normal brain lets me just. not rewatch things in order now lol. couldn't possibly do that!)#i understand why we don't have this yet though because it would be so time consuming#and shoutout to stillarchivingdnp who have gotten the closest to this and do very good archival work
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my most controversial star wars opinion is that i think lux bonteri is not a horrible concept per se but perhaps underutilised
#by underutilised i mean not pointed in the right direction. 2 episodes and 1 4-ep arc is enough for him i think#yes ik hes annoying but it is so fucking funny to me for ahsoka to have that one random friend who definitely went to a prep school#or something and also was literally a separatist until he decided hes going to go rogue now and make the worst choices ever#like either kill the will they wont they early OR cut it entirely and they can be so funny. we are in HOT SPACE what are you DOING HERE#you are going to DIE and the guys like yes thats the plan ^-^ you see ive fallen into business with a very powerful man ahsoka you might#have heard of him. goes by the name of /hondo/. and ahsoka does the biggest fucking sigh ever#cut the kiss cut the bullshit keep the funny. and ahsoka needs more friends her age anyway#anyway i think im just soft on him bc his entry into the show meant a fucking respite from Other Ships I Really Didn't Like In TCW FFNet#(femslash was there but not as big of a presence yet unfortunately)#i dont blame ppl who hate him bc a friend in need is his problematic arc but truly hand me a spanner i can fix him#lesbian and her momentary comp het bestie......she crashed on his couch at least once post order 66#oh and UNFRIDGE STEELA she should have been head of onderon or something. so bullshit#as he is in canon he feels like wasted space for ahsokas character. theres no point in giving her any love interest while shes in the order#and barriss riyo and the s7 gals are all better choices anyway#and you cant pull the 'well some separatists are just normal' card after s3 bc he also wants to kill dooku like. at least be funny!#or try to set up whatever the hell ahsoka does between s7 and rebels! idk man
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me: mom why don’t we ever host a shabeel
mom: [no response]
me: fine i’ll do it myself
#him#my art#orz#the other day i went for a walk#it was like a rainy day 😭😭😭😭😭#and saw a bunch of shabeels being held#now i do know that it’s the sort of thing that’s planned in advance so it wasn’t really their fault#but it was still a bit funny that 😭😭😭😭 out of all the days of the summer they ended up picking the nicest & coolest days 😭😭😭😭😭#so i got into wondering why we never host one 😭😭😭 i remember one being held at our ancestral home but never at our current place#(tbf they have a joint family so there’s a lot more manpower available hashtag nuclear family problems)#so in order to fulfil my dream i drew this concept 💅#maybe his husband wanted to host one?? but that’s just the two of them (and maybe their 3 kids)#i feel like you need at least five people…….. maybe they can call his cousins?? if he has any non-evil ones (haven’t decided yet)#maybe they just call their friends? or neighbours ❓ idk i think Urvish (husband) is friendly enough to convince people#maybe they can even call his ex… why not? the ex desperately needs goodwill with god tbh so this is a good place to start
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Good evening girls. Made an absolute fool of myself @ the sams club today
#basically I was like let me go get snacks for the salon since my mom added me to her membership and I haven't really utilized it yet#got my snacks. was like okay let me get a slice of pizza! thatll be good#order my pizza. they tell me it'll be a 12 minute wait. I say that's fine!! and decide to put my snacks in the car while I wait#get out to my car. get all the snacks in. have one case of dr pepper left. haul it up.#one can fucking explodes and covers my light pink skirt in dr pepper viscera and gore#I now look like I've pissed myself#aight. well I already paid for my pizza so I gotta go back...#clean up as much as two napkins allow me to and head back in#ofc nobody cares but it feels like people are looking. whatever. so what if I pissed myself. grow up.#go to fill up my cup w dr pepper (despite the betrayal). no dr pepper.#dear god why. okay. uhhhhh starry???? i guess!!#take a sip. it tastes like shit. oh well. theyre calling my name now#go pick up my pizza. the cheese is nice and melty and it smells good. :) okay. life is still good!#halfway back to the exit I'm balancing my plate on my arm and and I'm holding the cup claw machine-style#the lid snaps off the fucking cup and it spills a good 1/2 cup (cooking measurements) onto the floor#oh my god why. why why why why why.#okay. we can fix this. it's not a ton. put my cup on table and do a cute little walk of shame back to the napkins#get like 50 napkins and do my goddamn best to clean up my mess. goes fine. okay. time to get the fuck outta here before I do something worse#back at my car. open door. holding cup like normal now. lid pops off again and spills all over my skirt a second time.#why the fuck is this happening to me.#out of rage I put my pizza in the car and dump the rest of the cup out on the pavement. tasted like shit anyways#lady in car next to me watches the whole thing.#yeah you're witnessing mental illness bitch. enjoy.#lost my appetite. pizza is good but I don't even want it now
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im finally going to replay y0...
#it's been a little over 2 years#and ive never replayed any of the games before so im very interested in what this is gonna be like#i just played them slowly and in order + lad ishin at the end#i kinda wanted to do the judgments first but uh. they're never on sale <3#someday though#ugh im nervous though#not about this but like. ok real ones will remember that a couple of months ago i mentioned i finally asked my mom for like. mental health#assistance that wasnt her telling me to stop spiralling. the two appointments we could do were like. next week or october#i technically have enough time to get my shit together but ive also like. never talked to an actual doctor about this stuff before#and she kept asking me if i could be more specific than 'general longterm mental health issues' (and anxiety which she added)#but like. i dont wanna tell her Shit about that yknow#especially not like. just woken up at 2pm no preparation#also she added anxiety on her own. so you KNEW it was an issue and you didn't fucking do anything about it? at all??#truthfully i don't think it's nearly as big of an issue as before. i get stressed about stuff sure but it's pretty circumstantial#like these days i dont have anxiety about much of anything because im not trying to decide my entire future between 8 hour days in the#bright lights and eye contact factory#girl you don't have any idea what we're getting into by doing this#anyway if i get an ocd diagnosis that'll be the most awkward because that's the only one they actively joke about and that i've butted head#with them on. (i mean theyre also shit to npd/aspd ppl i just haven't chewed them out for it yet bc every time i do that i end up useless#for the rest of the day at least and i gotta pick my battles)#and idek what i wanna do about the Probably Autism going on man. i've been thinking about doing foster care/adoption for years now#when im older/if im ever financially stable. a diagnosis could basically nuke my options for that#but they'd NEVER believe a self diagnosis#whatever FUCK JT ITS YAKUZING TIME!!!!!!!!!#OH AND IT'S THE FIRST TIME DOING ONE ON LEGEND#which im nervous about bc i never really play stuff on anything but normal#so uh. 😬😬
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avoiding school work by drawing my weird little warforged fighter and her wife(cursed sword)
#silver sentinel oleander#and whatever tf the name of the sword is. havent decided yet#the iron queen#my ocs#my art#they have a very fun dynamic and i wanna ramble abt it so bad#good god it is not at all a healthy relationship but it sure is interesting#its pretty much entirely based on how ollie was built to fight and serve and now sorta has a complex where she NEEDS to serve. to be useful#bc otherwise she feels so so so lost and without purpose#since the day she was forged she has only known how to follow orders; how to protect the crown; protect the city#and then accidentally finds an evil cursed sword that causes her to kill the royal family and the rest of the silver sentinel#and when she realises what happened she is terrified bc not only has she failed her sole purpose; she now has no purpose#with no crown to protect; no royal family to serve; what use is she?#so when she hears the sword speaking to her; offering her a new purpose; service to a new queen#she accepts without hesitation#and and and#and its so fucked up bc the sword will actively hurt ollie bc it is still an evil cursed sword#and ollie would just be like i was built to fight and bleed and die for the throne anyway. i would gladly give you anything#but also the sword is almost. seductive and possessive in the way she commands ollie. like saying shit like#‘oh my beautiful loyal soldier. they would seek to wrench me from your grasp- from your protection. we shall make them pay’#like its very queen + queen’s bodyguard but if the queen was. a talking evil sword#but also yeah they are just tge ps5 boy video
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ignore this i just wanna ramble in the tags for a sec i’ll probably delete it in a bit 🤪
#did an escape room with the fam on my sister’s birthday two days ago and my brother made me feel stupid the entire time#wouldn’t listen to me wouldn’t share or let me help and then act like i wasn’t helping (??? let me then)#and because he’s Loud my whole family was following his lead and ignoring me#but in the end i was the reason we won bc i was the only one who immediately understood the word riddles AND the one who wrote down#all the numbers he said we wouldn’t need. i was the only one who could connect the past information with the current problem#the only one who listened fully to the cd and decided to write down the locations without it being relevant yet#the only one who thought the tiny details might be relevant and the only one who automatically fixed his mistakes bc i noticed a pattern#and in the end still got no credit for anything (except from my mom) even tho if they had listened to me from the beginning they would’ve#been less stressed and finished sooner#then at the restaurant he didn’t listen to me again and we ordered too much even tho i told him we wouldn’t need it#THEN after dinner my grandma started texting me all frustrated telling me i need to keep my aunt updated on what’s happening thru the day#so she doesn’t feel left out. bc she’s having a rough time lately. bc it’s my job to make everyone feel better#FIRST of all this woman ignored me for years when her ex husband decided i wasn’t worth it#and now suddenly it’s my job to keep u informed on my every move so u don’t feel left out?? text me urself. ask what i’m doing.#ask HOW i’m doing??? do u even care beyond a ‘what colour is your sturdiness today namaste’#every time my aunt complains about the tiniest thing and starts crying about it it my grandma blames everyone else#no one even knows or cares if i’m having a rough time#she came to ‘help’ when my mom was sick and i did everything for her instead. and then she threw a fit when i wouldn’t eat her salad#when i was too exhausted from staying up all night with my mother to go on a run with her the next day#my mom finally got mad at her for implying i’m lazy all the time and told her i’m ‘neurodiverse’ and do things my own way and she didn’t#even know what that meant so my mom was like ‘on the spectrum ‘ and my aunt just got mad that she had never told her#would it have made a difference at all? would u have expected different from me?#meanwhile i’ve done so much for my cousin… including taking care of luca the entire time she stayed with us. i had him all the time#i didn’t mind. i love that kid more than anything. but everyone expects everything from me like it’s just a given#i talked her through every problem every breakdown walked on eggshells to keep her happy and then what does she do when she leaves?#ignores me. doesn’t come back when she said she would. complains that i don’t include her in things#bc sometimes i have quiet conversations with my sister so i don’t bother everyone#and then gg wants to know why i won’t come see her? why i won’t drop everything to fly there? my aunt wants to know why i don’t call?#because despite loving me u have made me feel inadequate my whole life. some of u more than others#and i’m tired. and it’s time for me to Be me For me without justifying it to everyone else.
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#their relationship is my favorite part of the movie hands down #i know i'm on the 'ship literally any two men who look at each other for 1.2 seconds' website but #the fact that xenk/edgin is so much more popular than the actual real platonic relationship these two had going on still surprised me
A lot of people like my lips. What people? Uh, they’re out there. Do they like your eyebrows too? What’s wrong with my eyebrows?
#what lizz said#we need more platonic life-partners/co-parents who are both straight in media#they COULD be attracted to each other but they AREN'T. and yet they STILL decide to build a life together!#because you don't have to have sex or romance in order to be a family!!!#god i love it sfm#was NOT expecting something this delightful in this#DND#as queue wish
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