#<- better gen tag because i'm silly

[chipsonthemenu]

wauugh. does anyone else listen to mal blum. they have a band called mal blum and the blums and that reminds me of jrwi. yknow. gillion and the tidestriders. its silly to me okay their music is so good

AND AFTER A SEARCH I FOUND THAT I WAS SMART IN USING THEY/THEM, MAL USES THEY/THEM AND HE/HIM AND IS TRANS. QUEER ARTIST. MUSIC SLAPS. WHAT MORE COULD YOU WANT.

[yellow-computer-mouse]

⭐Intro Post⭐

ATTENTION: My DTIYS is up! Due date: October 5th!

Hey, what's up? I'm yellow-computer-mouse, also known as Yellow! I have a lot more info on my carrd, but here's the important stuff:

Pronouns:

He/Him

It/Its

Star/Stars

Ey/Em

I am a minor!

I am fictionkin (Snowfall WoF, Winter WoF, Aeolus EPIC) and a therian (Norwegian forest cat)!

⭐Userboxes by @kthecritter and myself! and blinkies by @spectral-stuff & @dragonpride17⭐

I use a lot of tone tags, and while you don't have to use them for me, it can help if the tone of a statement is unclear! Here are the main tags I use, along with their meaning! If you have any questions on other tone tags, ask away!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

/gen - Genuine! I honestly mean what I said! There is no sarcasm or passive aggressiveness in my sentence.

/genq - Genuine question! I'm asking a question out of curiosity, not malice!

/silly - Silly! I'm just messing around for the memes.

/lh - Light-hearted! I'm not being too serious, so don't stress it! Normally used alongside /silly :)

/lyr or /ly - Lyric! I'm quoting song lyrics.

I am also always willing to add trigger warnings to a post! If you feel like it's needed, let me know! You can reblog, send an ask, or DM me, whatever is most comfortable for you!

This does not apply to the 🦃🪓 anon because that is still ongoing, but please don't start ARGs with me. It's super cool that people want to, but I am not a puzzle guy. Thank you! (And no hate to turkeyaxe ^^)

I also use a lot of text colors! Here are the main ones and what they mean!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Red - Added emphasis. I'm drawing the eye to the important parts of a big text block.

Green - Links! I will never put anything incorrect behind a link, not even a rick roll.

Blue - Mostly just used on this post. I use blue whenever I type out a tag in the main part of a post.

Purple - Song lyrics!

Pink - Tagging a user!

There's some more things that I want to add, so they're going here! Nothing too important, so you can ignore this part if you want. /gen

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

My favorite color is yellow! It took me a while to figure this out, so please don't be mean about it. No yellow hate on this blog! /hj

I also like orange and red!

I love getting asks! Even if it's just one word with no context, it makes me happy!

I love it so much, I made three ask blogs! All are WoF-centered: @ask-hs-jade-winglet and @wof-adoption-au are canon characters, and @wofsidequesters is for my OCs!

I also made a daily art blog called @daily-snowfall! go check it out if you're interested in having one (1) snowy on your dash every day

My favorite food is cheesecake!

My birthday is July 28th! I am a Leo (or a Cancer, going by the new chart! lmk which fits better if you want ^^)

My favorite animals are isopods, thresher sharks, and whale sharks!

My favorite UTMV characters are Nightmare, Red, and Dust!

My favorite WoF characters are Winter, Turtle, Blue, Sunny, and Starflight!

I have a pet cat named Azzy, a dog named Homer, and a leopard gecko named Honeydew!

I have an Artfight! My user is yellow-computer!

I take requests sometimes! Icons and headers, free to use as long as you credit me! I draw dragons, furries, cats, humans/humanoids... pretty much whatever! Requests are currently open!

I don't have an extensive DNI, but there are still some things I'd like to keep out of my blog!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Proshippers/Comshippers/Neutrals

Zionists

Radqueers

Anti-furries (from people who believe all furries are zoophiles to people who just think it's weird)

TERFs/SWERFs

Basic DNI criteria (homophobes, transphobes, right-wingers/centrists, racists, etc.)

Here are some people who I welcome here!

Alterhumans/Nonhumans! (therians, fictionkin, otherkin, otherhearted, etc! Voidpunk as well, but that's different from the others listed)

Selfshippers! (As long as it's not pro/comship, go right ahead!)

Systems!

Those with commonly stigmatized disorders!

People who are "cringe"!

In general, anyone who isn't on my DNI!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

I am a part of many fandoms, but here are some of my favorites!:

Will Wood

Bears in Trees

UTMV

WoF

Portal

Slime Rancher

The Owl House

Epic: the Musical

The main fandoms I post about are WoF and UTMV.

I am taking commissions for Palestine! More info on that in the post below, or DM me!

Also, if you are a Palestinian with a GoFundMe, feel free to send an ask or DM me for support! I can't donate, but I will promote your campaign however I can!

Remember to do your daily clicks for Palestine!

Icon Masterpost

Furry Species (Aebe) Masterpost

UTMV/WoF Playlist Masterpost

Blog Masterpost

Thanks for reading my rambles, and have fun! ^-^

[riewritten]

Idk I love every scene you write, mostly Erwin physically touching the Mc, hugging her, comforting her etc. or you can draw one of your favorite scenes

this got nothing to do with what OP was originally talking about (they r talking about dusk in the brightest fanfic btw) but hey. the prompt is suddenly in line w/ my mood.

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐈𝐒 𝐌𝐎𝐑𝐄 𝐓𝐎 𝐆𝐄𝐓 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍 𝐀 𝐋𝐎𝐕𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐋𝐄?

ERWIN X GEN!NEUTRAL READER, ERWIN X YOU, NO Y/N

WORDS: 1.2k

idk what to tag aside from fluff & comfort bc the author is having an utterly terrible day again. i am scraping every bit of serotonin boost i could get because :( it’s just so :(

Heap of documents splattered across the table, to-dos that you weren't able to note hence long forgotten, the messages you intentionally leave unopened because it makes you sick, and all your utterances of "Okay, I'll get on to this one once I'm not burdened by the other task," which is, in hindsight, very counterintuitive because you can't even function anymore — because everything makes you sick. And there's this looming worry that, what if, what if this is all I could get?

"Hey,"

What if this is the farthest I could be for the rest of my life?

"Look at me,"

If I can't accomplish more—if I won't be able to finish this all, how dare I say I'll reach places farther than where I am?

What if—

Thoughts were cut off when a warm huge palm took a hold of your cheek.

"I told you to look at me."

"Oh, Erwin, regarding the deadline, I'm currently on it now. Have you seen the email I sent for your approval? A-and—" you panicky roamed at the papers in search of something you can't even mentally grasp as of the moment. 

Only to halt in sheer terror when you hear Erwin sigh as he sat on the table.

Now you can't look at him in the eye, "I'm so sorry. I'll do better next time."

"There's something more important for you to do better right now."

You met his eyes in a hitch. But even before you could respond, Erwin took hold of your hand; his fingers then started massaging your palm.

He first pressed on your thenar—a point just below your thumb. It was an utterly gentle massage, perhaps aware that with wrong pressure, his broad and strong fingers could instead hurt you. "Does your head hurt?"

You think there are lots of questions that are more important to ask right now, but still, "Yes, a bit."

He hummed, then his hands moved a bit. Still below your thumb, but leaning towards its edge. He pressed on it—repeatedly, languidly, while looking at you with features tranquil—perhaps he's trying to pass the same mood to you.

"Erwin, I have lots to do that will become backlogs if—"

"Shh,"

You purse your lips out of instinct.

You could laugh—hell, you would, but that doesn't erase his gentle command. For long you've been with Erwin, you already know that the most serious favors (or orders) are the ones he delivered with sheer gentleness. 

"How about your back? Does it hurt?"

"Uh huh. I've been seated all day."

After a last press, his fingers transferred to the point below your pinky. He silently did his work yet again, and now you feel the effects of it.

"Wow. Where did you learn this?"

"It's called acupressure. I actually already do this to you during the most random of times. Bet you thought I was just playing with your hands."

You chucked; yes, all this time you thought Erwin was just mindlessly fumbling your hands.

"And, for the last one…" He didn't ask a question this time around. His silly giant fingers just automatically shifted to the lower part of your palm, parallel to where your ring finger rests. "Here we go."

"What is this part for, Mr. Smart?"

The question was followed suit with a bell—the signal that the work shift is over. 

Finally, Erwin clicked a warm smile, scooted his head lower and gave your lips a small peck. After all, when the work shift is over, he can go all lovely on you again.

"Thank you," you whispered as soon as he withdraw his lips on yours. "So, what does this part of my palm cure, hm?"

He pressed on that spot again, his smile—while not gone at all—toned down a bit. A slight squint of your eyes and you'd think he turned quite lamentful.

"This part eases anxiety."

Your smile faded, something Erwin already anticipated. 

It's not because he confronted you so subtly, but he also didn't bother asking if you really are before pressing on that part. He saw it so well.

"I'm all fine now," you halted his fingers by squeezing your hand on it. "Let me get back to my work."

"Nuh-uh, shift's done now."

To establish the off-work mood, Erwin worked on removing his necktie. If you weren't so tired you'd gush at how hot the sight was, but then again, he didn't give you time to process everything. He slyly stood up and covered your eyes with the tie.

You are being blindfolded by your man. Why?

"Hey, the hell—"

"Shh," he landed a kiss on top of your head. You heard him roam his pocket, then a opening pop came. Not long after, a strong scent tingled your senses. 

"What is that? It smells like lavender."

"Heh," Erwin proudly huffed. "Levi bought me one. It's an essential oil."

You laughed a bit loudly. Now, despite his eccentricities, you can't help but be endeared. Oh, what were your concerns again? What about staying in the same place for the rest of your life?

Not like the bother would subside just like that, but this is one of the things you'd be willing to stay in for the rest of your life.

"Old fart."

"Am I, now?" Erwin cooed as his finger damped the oil on the tip of your nose—just so you'd smell it more. "Such a handsome old man, am I not?"

You grinned softly. "And all mine."

Despite the constricted vision, you're sure as hell Erwin's smiling from behind too. He genuinely loves whenever you speak of owning him.

"See, your handsome old man wants you to sleep a bit but your mind is not being kind to you right now."

"And what does it have to do with getting my eyes blind?"

"It is so your brain momentarily shuts the fuck up. It would most likely start when it doesn't see anything anymore, no?"

"Watch your mouth, mister."

You felt his lips on yours, teasingly so, with fingers—pleasantly reeks of lavender—gliding over your cheeks. The sweet exchange, soft chapped lips, and little bit of tounge playing at the corner of your lips covered you in utter solace. This is all you could wish for, all you needed. Just the thought of your needs being met at its most tipping core renders you lightheaded.

That's why when Erwin withdrew from the kiss, you were already panting.

"Yeah? What's with watching my mouth, hm?"

"More."

"I'll give your demands once you grant mine."

"What's your demand? Fuck."

"Sleep."

"How can I sleep with this. Please."

Just as if he knew the answer. Erwin grabbed you to stand up, sat on the chair, and had you sit on his lap instead. He urged you to burry your head on the crook of his neck, engulfed your figure to his embrace, and uttered soothing hums.

Indeed, it was answered. Seconds away and you're already lulled to sleep.

What if this is the farthest I could be for the rest of my life?

Well, if you have this lovingly eccentric man on your side, the farthest could never be absolute.

What if this is all I could get?

What is more to get than a love this gentle?

🏷 @frenchdyer (slightly inspired by your OC office AU btw :')) @watyousayin | SUBSCRIBE TO STORIES

MORE OF SWEET SUBTLETIES: EPISODIC SERIES HERE

sorry. i know there are some series u want to be updated more than this, but im just too down and mind fucked to strategize. all i can do is a self-insert. yes, this is the first ever genuine self-insert ive made

bc today i emptied my bank acc due my mom's hospital emergency, spilled coffee on my work laptop, and almost cried with all the work i had to do bc it daunted to me that im not even keeping up with the schoolworks that i missed yet due to the weeklong out-of-town conference we had in work.

and it's seriously taxing questions of what if this the farthest i could get bc of how incapable i am? honestly, i'd rather die than stay in where i am rn.

DILLEMA ASIDE, erwin is the embodiment of my support system in my previous environment! yes, the acupressure and ointment is a habit my ex taught me (hope they’re in a good place rn. theyre such a kind person!!)

[titanusamarante]

Hey Proshippers, Listen

You know,  as someone who has been in fandom so long that I helped produce local fanzines and my childhood internet browser was Mosaic. I feel like I need to say some things. Proshippers would get a lot less flak if y'all tagged your stuff better. Most folks are mad at proshippers because a ton of y'all include the general fandom tags, so graphic incest/rape headcanons and problematic ship art shows up in normal searches, and folks get squicked at best at triggered at worst. And y'all have way too many variations of the 'proship' tag, so that gets around tag blocking. Also, I've seen a lot of proshippers picking fights by flooding antiship tags with proship content. Meanwhile the proship tags have like, one or two haters. Y'all are kind of the aggressors here. And for the goddess' sake, stop acting like someone hating an incest or lolishota smut fic/headcanon is somehow analogous to nazi book burning. It's REALLY not. I think most of the problem is that the unyielding hand of capitalism forced all of fandom to interact when in the old days it was a bit more spread out. Certain content had its own locked communites or even separate websites. The idea that incest and to be frank pedophilic ships were more 'welcome' back in the day by wider fandom is because that stuff wasn't right out in the open. You had to actively go looking for it via websites or groups dedicated to the pairing. So the groups around it were naturally more blasé about it. It was literally by design. Meanwhile general fandom could theorize and make silly crossovers and gen fics. Nowadays, fandom is a continent worth of ecosystems in four of five public parks. We need separate spaces again. It was healthier that way. Then you can theorize in one space and head on over to another for the spicy content you want. And Gen folks couldn't stumble on said content as easily. But in the meantime, stop the victim complex and baiting and tag your stuff properly. (No general tags, keep to your ship tags). Then your 'anti' problem will drop by a good bit. Get your edgelord (picking fights on purpose and actively try to trigger folks) problem under control and the number will drop further. Youll still get death threats, because this is the internet and because both sides have a serious edgelord problem. But, go pool your resources and make your own version of the lemon archive with a nice forum. Then when the death threats come, you can literally go 'why are you here then?' AO3's tagging system is neat in the meantime, but it still has issues. Also, before the threats come. I'm not an 'anti' (unless it's RPF, which is ACTUALLY dehumanizing). I know certain fiction ain't going anywhere, even if I consider it gross. Just tag it better, ffs.

BTW, y'all REALLY need to learn the difference between media criticism and 'ban this filth' puritanical screeds. I lived in the Bible Belt during the Satanic Panic. I KNOW what ACTUAL censorship cries look like. And yes, fandom does have some serious issues. Especially with racism and misogyny. You can also criticize things you like, because nothing is perfect.

[sweetshelluvaau]

wait when was fizz ooc /gen

like tbf we didnt know a lot about him off-stage before oops so even tho he wasnt what he expected i wouldnt necessarily say it was ooc

same for ozzie

Maybe ooc isn't exactly the right term (at least in Oops case, the Mammon episode, oh he was completely ooc imho. I explained my thoughts about this here) more than how the narrative has everyone in the show be like 'isn't Stolas great?' and just defending him like Fizz you barely even know the guy! That or the writers fear that they can't write an abuse victim which happens to also be a horrible person. They have to be the 'prefect victim'. They took Fizz's bite away in the Mammon episode where he couldn't stand up for himself let alone have these insecurities he didn't have before out of no where?

Fizz not being able to protect himself physically? Okay I can buy that he's not a fighter. Fizz walking on eggshells around Mammon? Completely understandable being he's both his idol and his boss. But I'm sorry he wouldn't have sit there and take Glitz and Glam insults without snapping back? He'd also chew out that obsessed fan as well (which would also show how he grew from a timid teenager to a Snarky Shit). Yeah he may get a word from Mr. Christmas Tree after for the fan thing, but with G&G? C'mon, a little drama is great entertainment Mammon would eat that shit up if it means more view and money.

However with the case of Oz: He was written as if he was a complete idiot just to make Stolas look better in Oops. Yeah thankfully he didn't kiss Stolas' ass and seems to not like the guy (and I know Viv is gonna recon that in the future because god forbid we have a character that isn't a villain not like Stolas) but the whole thing with the lawyer and and Ozzie making really rash decisions (I mean yes he's hot headed but he's not stupid) and really Stolas NOT needing to be there.

Also saw someone in the critical tag mention this today: I'm sorry, Ozzie would sense something is up with Stolas and his 'feelings' for Blitzo. We had this ham fisted consent speech that went over owl boys head and you're telling me a man who's lived for thousands of years and has most likely dealt with some of the worst of humanity and demons Earth and Hell have to offer isn't gonna sense any red flags? And considering how much he hates people like Mammon, I'm sure plenty of the Ars Goetia aren't any better.

In other words Ozzie could smell bullshit from a mile away.

Also I'm ranting about this again for the hundredth time but Ozzie wouldn't sit around listening to some lawyer, he'd go to rescue Fizz himself. The guy can teleport anyways so I'm sure he can easily sneak into Crimson's compound and lay down the smack down like it's no one business because he's a SIn for crying out loud! And maybe after seeing Blitzo keeping Fizz safe and having that conversation with Stolas, Oz would likely just give Blitzo the crystal as a thank you suppose to giving to Stolas to give it Blitzo being again, he's picking up bad vibes.

That or have Fizz deliver it at a later date. After all, it was Fizz who said he 'earned it' and who's word do you think Ozzie is going to take to heart? It sure ain't Hooters.

That being said I'd also blame the fact that the same character can act one way in another episode and then have a completely different personality in the next if it means fitting the narrative. No one character is consistent and can change if it means making a character look better or again, fits the narrative of that said episode. What did they have some character development the last few episodes ago? Never mind that we're back to their old self or better yet, they have a completely new personality all together the fuck?

Honestly, I'm kinda drained from making the same agreements all time. All I wanted was a silly demon show about some silly demon assassins, not whatever the fuck we got now. At this point I just want to focus mostly my AU and other projects.

[sanchoyo]

Hiiiiii, it is I again!! I just finished Cold Love and gosh!

The ending was just so nice, mostly when I thought SHIGGY WAS DYING FOR A MOMENT- 😭 Then they were just being super sweet at the beach and I ngl cried a little, they all deserved that happiness <3 I also still wanna cry (In a good way tho) BECAUSE I FINISHED THE WHOLE THING I wanna write a little note to myself, next to my bed, erase my memories about these 2 fics, then wake up next morning, read the note and reread the whole thing with as much joy as the first time! I'm gonna reread them FOR SURE, but not now as they're still fresh in my brain :3

And you know, Cold Love has opened my mind more than it already was I mean I already love heroes and villains, but you've put a lot more details that made me go: "Shit, I didn't think it was THAT much"

The way you wrote how the hero commission treats heroes made me think of what my parents always tell me about Actors and Models. "Their lives/bodies don't belong to them, it belongs to the company they work for" That sentence hit me even more when the chapters were Hawks centered. Poor guy, he was a literal lab rat. The worst is that he ISN'T THE ONLY ONE GOING THROUGH THAT

Villains, I already sympathized with a lot, in other medias and MHA too But your fic made me realize that, when they do those crimes, it's for them but mostly for OTHERS as well!! They're like heroes, in a way, because they want to make society BETTER. They do this because they know how it feels to be rejected, hated and they want to change it so NO ONE ELSE has to go through this. Also, we often see them not caring about dying if they do achieve their goal, because they know next gens will have better lives than they ever had. WHICH I THINK IS HELLA SAD BUT SO NICE OF THEM???

Though I DON'T agree with them taking lives of course, but I don't hate them anyways because, when they've been rejected by everyone and everything, how else are they supposed to get attention? Very unfortunately, crimes is often their answer…

I think, if I was in MHA, I'd also opt for the Vigilante route. Fuck the hero commission lmao

I won't tell why, but let's just say that I'm more compassionate about villains now <3

ON A MUCH LIGHTER NOTE!! Fanart for Warm Healer is on the way!! So keep an eye open? :3

Fun fact for Cold Love: When Bret asked why Dabi was in the closet, I blurted out: "BECAUSE HE'S GAY!!" Lmao

So yeah, just wanted to say your fics are great! They've inspired me into improving my own fics <3 I even started making my own Shiggy x Reader AND a Dabi x Reader too! Because most of them are smut centered and I don't want just NSFW ya kno?

Anyways, I'm done rambling lol Thanks for writing WH and CL, thanks for inspiring me, thanks for bringing me joy and sorry for rambling that much lmao

Hope you're doing well, lots of love, take care and keep being awesome!!

thank you so much for such a long, sweet message 💗💗💗

I really enjoy bnha fics where the writers closely examine the society and its problems because its SO interesting (and im kind of sad the way it went in canon, I wanted a lot more and found the school setting kind of restricting for it in general, but we'll always have fics haha) i'm glad you enjoyed me doing that just a little bit! (maybe it was kind of weird to include in a romance SI series, but also it would've felt like a huge disservice in my opinion because ALL of the villains stories are influenced by the society they live in and how heroes are treated...)

aaah again, don't feel obligated to do the fanart but if you do, definitely tag me/send it my way, I'd love to see!! 🥺 (also you're writing your own shigaraki/reader and dabi/reader!!! omg!! I hope you have fun making your own!!! they're so fun to write <3 I agree on the wanting more SFW SI fics, sometimes I just wanna go on silly adventures with my favs y'know? :"))

no need to apologize for rambling!! I'm so happy to hear you enjoyed it so much!!! your message made my day ^_^ I hope you have a good day too and your writing/art projects go well!!

[rulersofthetriassic]

Into Post!

Hi! My name is Max Taylor (14 this year! March 16th!)! I am-... uh was an up and coming Dinosaur King! Trying to protect the Dino Cards from the Alpha Gang!

I don't know if they're here or not but! Better safe than sorry!

I have my buddy Chomp with me! And uh, I have some pokeballs... I don't really know what to do with them to be honest ^^;

Oh yeah- He/Him!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey. My name is Rex Owen, He/They, 15 on November 10th. I am following the idiot above me around just to make sure he doesn't go and get himself killed, but doing that made me end up in this mess...

He also doesn't really understand what Pokemon are, I tried explaining it to him but it won't get though his thick skull, I swear he's like a Pachycephalosaurus... I know what Pokemon are, none of them past gen 2 however, so... bear with me.

I have my Carnotaurus Ace, and uh... this Pikachu looking thing, Mimikyu? I call it Rag.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hiiiii! My name is Zoe Drake! She/Her! I'll be 15 in April on the 2nd! I like using the pink color in text so I hope people don't mind that <3

I kinda have an idea of what Pokemon are! But I only played Kalos and not that far either =< so please be patient with me!

I have my little cutey baby Paris! And this Applin that was following me around! I think I might name him Pie based off the evolution I saw ^^

That's all really! Hope we can make some friends here!! =D

//Ooc info under the cut

//Ooc. This is a sideblog! Unreality. Mod is an adult and goes by She/her and He/Him. All art I use is my own! I follow from @theshadowqueenofthedistortion ... Here's some of my other accounts as well!

//Semi-Serious blog, I will participate in active silliness and also write serious stuff. Will sometimes touch on death, abuse and a few other things, I will tag the serious stuff with their appropriate tw/cw tags.

//Magic anons are on! But I'm picky, and these are KIDS, so don't be weird.

//Shipping will be self contained, I have plains.

//I am very open to crossover stuff!

//Pokemon in this universe have human levels of sentience.

//Real life animals exist along side Pokemon in this universe.

//What the tags mean! Max Taylor Typing!: On the tin, Max is typing/writing a post Rex Owen Reads: A Rex post Zoe Drake Dreams~: A Zoe Post Chomp/Ace/Paris Nonsense: One of the dinos posting because I think it's funny We're The Dinosaur Kings!: Closed and/or serious RP. I will also use this tag when responding seriously to something. //Shadow Mod Speaks: Mod speaking. //Mod Reference: Me and/or Zorana making references. //Shadow Art: Art by me that isn't a ref/finished.

[marley-rose]

kiss your lips sore || marley & elijah 📝

TAGGING → marley rose & @elijahwilde

LOCATION → psu mixer

TIME FRAME → 7/13/2024

NOTES → what starts out as just friends chatting ends in multiple orgasms that only one of them will remember the next day. NSFW, obvi??

Marley grabbed a cherry coke from the bar and headed back toward the party, only to be stopped in her tracks when she saw...well, him. That's what he was to her, in her head. He was the only person who could stop her in her tracks in this specific way. She could tell she'd caught his eye and she smiled at him brightly, closing the gap between them and giving him a one-armed hug. He smelled good, looked good....was good. Always good to her in every way. God. "I didn't know if I'd see you here, but I'm so glad I did. These things aren't really my jam, I feel like I'm older than everyone. When did that happen?"

The night had been... weird, for lack of a better word, but Elijah was still holding out hope that like, something would go right. His eyes scanned the room, looking for someone who would make the night some hilarious story to tell rather than just a faded, drunken memory, and he did happen upon one Marley Rose. Perfect. "Stop it, Mars Bar," Elijah scoffed, wrapping his arms around her and grinning. "Because if you say that we're the village elders, here, I'm going to have to jump out a window. I purposefully caught up on all Gen Z slang so that nobody would actually know me as a millennial. Want to hear about my rizz?"

"Only if you want me to lose my girl dinner," Marley hit back, her nose crinkling in a laugh at her own dumb joke. "But seriously, I'm so glad I ran into you, I was losing hope and feeling a little too awkward. I'm fine on stage, I never get nervous playing to a full room, but parties always make me feel like I'm in sixth grade again, standing on the wall, like no one sees me and I don't want them to. Except, well, you see me, and I mean, that's not so bad."

"Girl dinner," Elijah sang back to her, waving his hand like he was attempting some kind of Mariah Carey-level riff. At the mention of her feeling awkward, he shook his head, and tugged her even closer. "You're so silly," he began, but meant it in the kindest and most loving way. "You're Marley freaking Rose. Literally the sweetest and most compassionate person in the entire world. Like, I get being nervous but on the other hand, every single person at this party would be better off knowing you and having you in their life. I fully believe that."

God, he couldn't just say stuff like that, could he? It was making it harder and harder for her to stop thinking about him like that, and she'd been making a valiant effort. She shook her head, "Have you and Lilah started my official fan club yet? Because you'd be really great co-presidents," she said with a little laugh. "I don't know if I'm the sweetest and most compassionate person in the entire world, but I mean, I will accept the title as long as it comes from you," she touched his shoulder affectionately and sipped her drink, "This is just cherry coke, by the way. I didn't want to be old and drunk at this thing."

I will fight her to be president of your fan club," Elijah said, looking at her very seriously and giving her a tiny bit of side eye. No, he was really kidding, but he hoped Marley would see it. "It's all good. I'll believe it enough for you until you can. Sound good?" Grinning, he tapped his own cup against hers, which decidedly did not contain only cherry coke-- but a Shirley Temple with vodka. "Oh, I'm two for two, Mars. Are you embarrassed to be seen with me?"

Marley snorted a laugh, "No, you're like, the only reason I'm not leaving," she confessed, cheeks pink. Damn. She smiled, "You're not an annoying drunk, you maintain your charm. I, however...just start crying or making out with a stranger apparently, all judgement and charm goes out the window!" she rolled her eyes, remembering the last time she'd gotten well and truly drunk, "I feel like I haven't recovered from the last time I got too messed up...and it was forever ago!"

Elijah laughed, but again, it was good natured and only stemmed from how adorable he thought Marley was. “Hey, I support all of your choices! If you want to drunkenly make out with a stranger, I’ll hold your bev.” He wasn’t gonna let her cry that night, though. “It’s like… scratching an itch, I guess? If you enjoy it, then once in a while doesn’t hurt.”

Marley thought on it; he wasn't wrong, not exactly. "Well what are you drinking?" she asked curiously, eyeing his cup. " 'Cause if I was gonna switch over, it'd have to be something pretty good, ya feel?"

“I’ve got a Dirty Shirley.” He hated the name as soon as he spoke it, and laughed. “Sorry, that sounds soooo fucking creepy? It’s a Shirley Temple with vodka. Tastes like candy. Do you want a sip to see if you like it?” He held it out to her.

Marley giggled at his phrasing, "Ohhhh no. I wish I'd recorded you saying that to save for posterity," she said. She nodded, "Hm, sure, why not?" She took a sip of his drink, the fruity taste hitting her nicely as the burn of the vodka tingled her throat, "Oh damn, I love this," she said with a smile. "Okay, okay, let's go get me one," she conceded, "I'm convinced."

“Amazing,” Elijah flagged the bartender and ordered another one. “A little sweet and a little bite, just like you.” When the bartender brought the drink back, Elijah clinked his glass against hers. “Cheers. To old friends and new adventures.”

There was that word again, friends. The loop that she'd got herself stuck in by not being brave. A little bite? What bite? Was the bite in the room with us? If she had bite, she'd kiss him right now, or she would've kissed him years ago when there was still any hope of anything happening. She put her smile back on her face and hoped the drink would loosen her up. She clinked glasses with him and took a drink, "Oh, that's beautiful, I could write a song about this very moment."

“Do it!” Elijah encouraged, nodding at her. “I would love to watch you write a song. I feel like it would be like watching Albert Einstein do math. I bet that music from Ratatouille plays, too. You know, the one where they’re cooking and in the zone? Would that be confusing, though? If music plays in your head that is different from the music you’re trying to write?”

Marley snorted, grabbing a tiny notepad and a pen from her purse - this wasn't an odd thing for her, inspiration was everywhere. "The lyrics usually come first, but not always perfectly formed, kind of just like, general ideas." In the notebook, she scribbled, out of his view: this tastes like candy but i bet it'd taste better on your mouth, bet i taste better than all the girls before, bet you'd never leave and it'd never go south if i was brave enough to kiss your lips sore, lalalala? maybe? As she wrote, her brow furrowed. How bold of her, actually, to write lyrics about him in front of him. "See, the music will come later. I actually have a lot of instrumentals and beats that I put together that might fit. We'll see later." She took another swig of dirty shirley and smiled at him.

Elijah read the words over her shoulder and was convinced suddenly of his ability to hallucinate. “Is this fiction?”

Marley thought she'd successfully kept her scribbles out of his view, but of course, she'd been concentrating so hard that she forgot to factor in that he could move to read them. She swallowed hard, her cheeks red. "Sometimes I write fiction, à la folklore..." she trailed off, but she felt it would lack artistic integrity to lie right now, aaaand maybe she was a lightweight, and despite having drained only half of her dirty shirley, she felt a little courageous, "But. this isn't that," she finished her thought boldly, taking another drink and looking him in his eyes.

Elijah stared at her for a moment, wondering if this was one of those alcohol induced fever dreams that Marley had been talking about. Getting sloppy, making out with a stranger. Personally, he’d never seen her exhibit that kind of behavior before, but he knew that someone’s perception of themselves could be brutal in even the best of cases. It was with all the courage and most likely none of the sense in his head that he narrowed his eyes at her. He made sure both of their drinks were nowhere in spilling zone before he carefully tugged her onto his lap, wrapping his arms around her waist. “If you wanted to kiss me, all you had to do was ask, Mars.”

Marley's eyes widened, but she didn't pull back, already feeling heat between her legs at how close he was to begin with, but now that he was under her, that was different. Shit. She smirked at his declaration, but realized he was for real when she saw the want in his eyes, and she wondered if he in turn could see the want in her own. She tilted his chin up and leaned in to kiss him softly, but her body had other plans. It wasn't soft, it was full force, it was cherry and vodka and a taste that belonged to just him. She sucked on his bottom lip and let his hands roam her body as they pleased, years of tension on her side breaking in one moment, and she felt fucking alive. She was right though, the dirty shirley did taste better on his mouth.

In no universe was Elijah expecting that this would be how the night went, but he certainly wasn't going to complain nor take this opportunity for granted. He'd expected something sweet, and nothing could have prepared him from the way she took over. Was it the alcohol making both of them brave? Or was this something she'd actually wanted? "Marley..." he moaned out her name as she deepened the kiss, tugging her impossibly closer onto his lap. He broke away from her, only to trail kisses down her jaw and settled in the curve of her neck, nipping at her skin and soothing it over with his lips. "You're mine tonight."

"I'm never anyone else's," she murmured, a total slip of the tongue, but a truth nonetheless. She tilted her neck back to give him more access, and without any permission from herself, she found herself grinding down into his lap in a room full of people, the ache between her legs simply needing a little something. She let out a small gasp at the sensation, goosebumps forming on her body under his touch, "We need to go somewhere," she whispered against his ear, "This is gonna get really real really fast," she reasoned, as if she wasn't literally riding him with their clothes on.

At the feel of her hips against him, Elijah knew that she was right. He was very quickly feeling his body start to react to her, and knew she could, too. Even the tiniest movement of her hips was making his breathing start to get ragged. He forced himself to break away from her neck and instead cupped her cheeks with his hands, giving her a kiss that was still passionate but not one that would end with them ripping their clothes off at the mixer in front of everyone. "Do you... want to come back with me? To my place? Or... would you rather find a dark corner?"

"Corner," Marley said breathily, knowing they'd probably just start in the back of the uber and ruin one of their ratings. "Take me somewhere, anywhere," she whispered against his ear, lust and a bit of the drink clouding her normally rational mind. This was so not what she'd normally do, but she also wasn't normally with the one person she thought about every night before bed. She hopped off his lap and extended her hand for him to take, and when they connected - yeah, maybe it was a static shock, pure science like her sister would say, but maybe it was the spark she was always singing about in her songs. Maybe, just maybe.

Elijah was ready to carry her to the corner if need be, but as he reached for her hand he brought it to his lips and kissed it. When they were far enough away from the rest of the party, and Elijah had found an alcove that was tucked far enough away that nobody could possibly find them, he gave her about a minute to process before pinning her to the wall and kissing her. “Do you even know how crazy you make me?” He asked, as he pressed up against her to let her feel just exactly what she’d done to him.

The second she felt him hard against her thigh, it was game over. She didn't even think, she just reached down to palm him through his pants, nipping at his jaw, "That's the thing, I didn't know," she said breathily, "But this is a good way to find out," she said, pressing a kiss to his mouth again, grinding herself against him in a way that she simply couldn't help.

Elijah whined against her lips as she palmed him, and he shifted to give her a better vantage point to grind against his thigh. “Take what you need, gorgeous.” Man, if she wanted to use him, he was the most willing for it. “I’ve wanted to kiss you every time we sing together,” he mumbled against her lips, as his hands skimmed down her sides to rest on her hips, encouraging her to move. “And that’s not the only way I’ve wanted to taste you…” He trailed off into another moan, kissing her with more fervor than he had now that the eyes were no longer on them.

Marley was torn between lust and pure adoration at his words, but the pulse between her legs was really winning out. She kissed him back hard, so hard that it practically hurt, but it hurt so fucking good, "Mmf, yeah?" she murmured, "Show me where you wanna taste me," she teased, carding her hand through his hair and locking eyes with him.

He needed no further permission, and as soon as he lasered in on her ocean blue eyes, he knew he was a goner. Elijah moved slowly, hoping to give her every possible out if she wanted him to stop, but trailed kisses all the way down her body before he knelt in front of her, his fingers just brushing against her thigh. “Can I kiss you here?” He asked, referring to the circles he was tracing under her skirt. “That’s one of the places I’ve wanted to taste.”

Marley bit her lip as she looked down at him, "Yeah," she whispered, "God, yeah," she practically whined, feeling the fabric of her panties completely soak now, she spread her legs apart to give him room to get where he needed, never taking her hands out of his hair.

With her permission given, Elijah gently pushed up her skirt and nearly felt the wind get knocked out of him. Marley’s voice, which was his favorite sound, somehow was even more intoxicating in this moment. He pressed kisses to the inside of her thigh, every few movements biting down and then easing it over with his tongue. When he got to her panties, he gently pushed them to the side to kiss her again, closer to her center wanting to see how reactive she was. He wasn’t surprised to find her already wet, but shocked that he’d been the one to do it to her. In one swift movement, he hooked his index finger over the waistband and tugged them down. One hand reached for hers, the other kept her skirt in place as he began working her up.

Marley couldn't stop herself from letting out whines and moans, and when he reached for her hand, honestly? For her that was the best part. She squeezed his hand as he dove in, her mouth falling open when she felt the heat of his mouth on her. She'd thought about this before, of course, but nothing could prepare her for the reality, the beast that was awakening inside of her every second this went on, "So damn good..." she whined.

Elijah knew the number one rule of going down on a girl was to not stop but he couldn’t help feeling proud of himself that he was the one doing this to Marley. He hummed against her, shifting his approach over to suction and nudging her hips in an encouragement to move. Elijah was ready to make sure she couldn’t walk by the end of the night. He squeezed her hand again, looking up at her with adoring eyes. He moaned, but it came out more like a hum against her body.

Marley's moans were getting higher, and higher still, and of course, she wasn't singing, but she sort of felt like she was. Marley squeezed his hand back, they were communicating without words, they didn't need them. She knew exactly what he wanted from her. She rested a leg on his shoulder and let herself fuck his face, grinding against his mouth as her cries got louder and higher - surely people could hear them if not see them, right? She didn't care. "Eli 'm gonna cum," she whimpered, her legs shaking.

Elijah nodded, humming against her still as he encouraged her, determined to make this the best damn sexual experience she’d ever had. Tall orders, but still. “Mhm,” he encouraged, enjoying the feeling like he was completely surrounded by her. Elijah shifted so that their fingers were interlaced instead, and squeezed her hand twice this time. He wanted her to know he was right there with her.

Marley ground herself against him a couple more times, and then she squeezed his hand hard as she felt her orgasm hit her, her moans turning to happy little sighs as her hips stuttered against him, "Oh my God," she murmured, placing her foot back on the floor so she wouldn't keel over, her whole body practically vibrating. All she wanted to do was kiss him again, "C'mere, c'mere," she commanded.

Elijah rode her through it, holding himself back slightly since he knew she might be sensitive. She wanted kisses, and he wanted to give them to her. Turning her down probably had to be the hardest thing he’d ever done in his life, but Elijah shook his head. Instead, he continued, kissing at her folds and waited until she showed him she was ready to go right back into it.

Marley took a second to understand what was happening, catching on quickly, and smirked when she did, "You're bad," she murmured, taking a second to breathe before hitching her leg back on his shoulder and reaching her hand out for him again, letting her head fall back as he practically devoured her for a second time. "Shit," she hissed, a little sensitive, but the tiny bit of hurt felt good.

Elijah held in most of his laugh, but it trailed off into a moan as he set himself up. He could have stayed there all night, drowning them both in pleasure. Forget the fact that he was starting to get uncomfortably hard against his pants, but it didn’t matter. Nothing did, other than making sure that Marley had no words other than curses and his name. He urged her to move her hips again as he gave her suction, moaning without a care who heard them.

Marley followed his lead, grinding her hips against him slowly at first, then a little faster, the ache building in her feeling impossibly sweet, just fucking gorgeous. She didn't know she liked a hint of pain until just now. The way he sucked her was almost too fucking much, and she loved the too-muchness of it all. She felt tingly everywhere, even her toes. She rocked harder against his face, her moans starting to sound more like sobs, but God was she happy.

Her voice was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard in his life, and he knew he’d do anything to get her to make these sounds again. As she reached her second climax, Elijah slid one finger inside her, searching for the spot that would make her really scream. He didn’t want to break his movements but he did want to tell her to let go.

Marley felt it hitting her again, like a fucking truck. She let out a moan-sob and felt herself shaking like a leaf as she let go, "Fuck," she cried. "Oh God, baby," she whined. She felt like she was on a higher plane of existence - no one had made her feel like this in a long fucking time, if ever. She wasn't sure if she'd ever felt quite this good with anyone, now that she thought about it.

This time, after Elijah rode her through it, he did stand up, take her into his arms, and kiss her. “You were so good for me,” he mumbled in between kisses, as he lifted her up and pinned her to the wall. “So fucking good, Marley.” He sighed, peppering kisses on her face.

Marley let herself be lifted and kissed him back with fervor, "I always wanted to be," she whispered, her senses buzzing. Everything from how he smelled to how he tasted to how good he just made her feel just made her need him to never stop touching her.

"I think we need to get out of here," Elijah swallowed, his voice very rough as he shifted his attention to her neck. "I can't have you in all the ways I want you on this desk, as fun as that would be. And you deserve a bed, really."

Marley's chest swelled with affection at his words, "So take me somewhere," she said matter of factly, pulling back to kiss him sweetly before moving to smooth her skirt down in preparation to simply blow this pop-stand. She bit her lip, her wet center still throbbing from all the attention it was getting. "You coming?"

Elijah reached for her hand and grinned. “Sure am. Should we go see if they’ll give us a room?” Maybe not the most romantic of circumstances, but he’d certainly make do with what he was given.

Marley nodded, "Mhm, yeah," she said, taking his hand and walking out of their little hidey-hole, making their way to the front desk. They probably looked like lovestruck teenage idiots as they approached the bored looking woman behind the keyboard, but Marley couldn't bring herself to care. "Hi! We'd like a room please, whatever you have available," she said confidently, like she wasn't requesting a room to fuck this man in right this minute. It was about to be a long, long night.

Marley didn't know this at the time, but she'd definitely left her underwear somewhere in that hotel, and also probably some of her dignity.

[gren-arlio]

So. Fia and the Mysterious School.

So uh...Yeah, I know I'm seriously late to the party when it comes to this stuff, but I realized that this was mostly done and it was in drafts, so I might as well post it. This might just be filler for the big post, but enjoy nevertheless. ----

Madou 4 is... looking pretty cool, I'm not gonna lie. Really enjoying the art direction they're going for. And the designs of the characters? Amazing.

Like genuinely, even if it doesn't get an official English release, I'm down to watch and learn about it.

(They're so...silly...)

Even the screenshot of the overworld is very charming to boot.

I heard a pal say "It looks like Gen 6 of Pokémon" and I could see it, but we'll have to wait and see for the true experience of this game.

I'll make what I think of the characters a Read More thing. Imo, looking amazing.

You can read about the stuff right here.

---

Fia:

The newest silly girl on the block. Besides me thinking that Witch finally got her name chosen, I genuinely love the design they went for, since small hats are peak character designs.

Apparently she's a bit of an airhead and I'm all for it. Let her get involved into dumb stuff because she's dense and clueless and stupid. We love that in this world.

---

Will:

Tbh, besides the whole crop top thing he has, I absolutely dig the design and color choices they went for. And also excluding the fact that his name is Will in a fantasy game, I do find it curious that he has a twin brother, Roy, who's apparently a teacher.

Oh, and since this is making headlines: Apparently he's got a mix of Lagnus and Rulue in him. So he HAS to be peak.

---

Leena:

I really dig the design, I won't deny it, somehow they made almost all blue look really, really nice. The site says that she's calm and collected, but struggles with speaking to people, which I will most likely hope is just her being shy to talk to people, rather than the whole "She just sounds like a pervert," like Schezo does.

She also apparently reads a lot, if the glasses and the shy personality didn't point at her being quite the reader. So with that, she might be peak.

---

Totto:

Green mage with white hair that covers the eye? Where have I seen that before... Jokes aside, he does open his eyes compared to someone we do know, and he's pretty different. According to the site, he's someone with a lotta info...you just gotta pay the dude for it. So like Anna from Fire Emblem.

Also apparently, there's some promise he made to someone? Who knows about it for now?

---

Eska:

Now this design is pretty unique, yellow and white with pink eyes is an interesting choice of coloring they went for. I genuinely like what they went for with her, AND she's half dragon? I wonder what they're gonna go with her.

She gains interest to Fia (It google translates to Fear, so uh...yeah.) after the start of the game, and she doesn't really have common sense, which is gonna be interesting.

---

Roy:

Besides the fact that he is NOT our boy this time around, Roy is Will's twin brother who went the teacher route in life rather than the hero route. He's basically the antithesis of Will; Cool-headed and prefers to be realistic to Will's optimism.

Also, I think he visually looks better than Will, but eh, that could change in due time.

---

And finally, Jurk:

Besides his kinda bad name IMO, I like his design a lot. A guy who simply travels the world is always a fun concept in any game, and his design is honestly one of the best I've seen from the game. He's also friends with the headmaster of the school, which could be interesting.

My main concern is the person he tags along with, Mew. She's probably going to be an alright character, but I don't have super high hopes of that. Plus, her design isn't selling me at all, it just doesn't look right.

---

But yeah, those are (at least for now), my honest thoughts for the game RN. Maybe when more is covered and shown off sometime. But that'll be all for today.

[randomingoftherandomness]

Fic: I know I love you

Tags: Gong Shangjue x Gong Yuanzhi, High School AU, Cousin Incest, Singer Gong Yuanzhi, Pining, Talent Show, Age Difference, Businessman Gong Shangjue, gonna add the underage tag just coz of the age difference

A/N: This is the song that got me back into Kpop. As a Gen 2 fan, I never thought I would ever get back into it once I left that group of friends who loved it as much as I did. But there I was, diving headfirst into Gen 4 Kpop and thus far, it's been great.

This is all to say that it's okay to be a fan of something. There's no age limit to be a fan and as long as you're not hurting anyone with your passion and enthusiasm, you're good :) If you needed to hear this today, there's always a place in fannish spaces for us older fans. No matter what other people might say x

If Gong Yuanzhi were to say that he didn't feel an ounce of nervousness, that would be a lie.

Sneaking a peek at the auditorium's crowd, he hears a loud cheer - definitely led by his cousin Ziyu, the absolute simp - when Yun Weishan's voice starts going into the chorus of that earworm of a song by Esther Yu. Next to him, he can feel Jin Fan pushing at his shoulder so that he can steal a glimpse of his other cousin Zishang who had partnered up with Yun Weishan.

He's surrounded by simps, he swears.

Turning back to where Jin Fu, Jin Fan's fraternal twin, is twirling his drums and this quiet dude they only know as Ah Yue is testing out the keyboards, Yuanzhi meets the latter's eyes and nods.

"Ready?"

"As I'll ever be," Yuanzhi huffs, fiddling with his guitar for the umpteenth time. Ah Yue takes pity on him and claps him on the shoulder. He doesn't even ask him the question he knows he wants to ask.

It's fine, Yuanzhi tries to reason. It's fine if he doesn't come tonight.

Logically, he knows that Shangjue gege is probably busy if not on another plane to another city to negotiate another deal to fatten up the family's coffers. More than that, he knows that Shangjue would have about a million things better to do on a Friday night than to attend some high school talent show just because half of the family's younger cousins are part of it.

Still, hope springs eternal. Even if reality is proving otherwise.

From where they stand at the curtained eaves of the stage, they can hear Yun Weishan and Zishang jie's voices bleeding into the final notes of their performance. It's show time.

"Deep breaths, yeah?" Ah Yue says, bumping fists with Yuanzhi as they step onto the stage to the applause of the audience.

They take their place as the emcees of the night announce their names and their class number. Breathing in deeply, Yuanzhi squints out at shadowed faces of the crowd, trying to quell the rapid-fire beating of his heart.

Positions himself at the microphone, he takes a deep breath, fingers pressing down on the opening chord.

I know I love you

Yuanzhi pours his heart into that opening growl. Behind him, he hears the guys start up on their instruments just like they'd spent hours and hours practising. Part of him wants to turn around, grin with glee at how cool this all is, but he holds on to what he needs to do.

In this world of zero, I know you're my one and only 

Try as he may, he cannot help his mind from turning to his gege. The lyrics of the song speak to a truth that his soul knows -- has known for a while now.

My life before you was a mess

Yuanzhi blinks and he can pick out Ziyu cheering him on in the shadows with a borderline maniacal grin. A warm sort of glow settles in his chest. This silly cousin of his...

He can’t help the grin of his own as he sinks his voice into the words. Adrenaline pumps through his veins when he hears Ah Yue’s voice harmonise with his own.

Now I can't stop thinking 'bout you, When I'm sinking alone

The beat kicks up. The drums start to pound through his chest and Yuanzhi closes his eyes as the guys all start singing together.

I know it's real, I can feel it

Yuanzhi feels free in the words of the song. Fingers strumming along as he tastes the way the crowd begins to cheer.

When he opens his eyes again, there he is. Standing in the back of the auditorium, haloed by the exit sign, but he’s here. In the shadows.

Yuanzhi can hardly believe it.

No.

He can’t bring himself to believe it.

I'm a loser in this game

For the longest time, Yuanzhi had trusted in the emotions that tells him he loves Shangjue gege like a brother. Fond and protective in a familial way, respect and admiration all wrapped into how Shangjue gege is so capable and strong.

There was always a thread of gratefulness, too, when Yuanzhi thinks about his emotions. Grateful that Shangjue took him in and practically helped to raise him.

If there was anyone who deserved his love, it’d be Shangjue gege.

All or nothing, I want all of you 

But emotions change.

And recently, Yuanzhi’s heart hurts whenever he thinks about how Shangjue is being expected to marry and have kids.

Even more so when he thinks of gege having someone to love and hold in that way. In the deepest darkness of the night hours, Yuanzhi can admit into the shadows that he wants to be the person that Gege holds and loves. Especially if it’s in that way.

I'm full of problems, love sick 

Yuanzhi keeps his eyes fixed on the shadowed halo on the fringes of the room.

Everything else fades away and he bleeds his heart and soul into the words. Meaning every syllable, every beat, every lilt and crescendo.

In some distant part of his senses, he can hear his band mates carry their own parts as they harmonise together. Yuanzhi doesn’t linger on them.

He keeps his eyes on his prize.

Say you love me, to the end of the world 

Logically, Yuanzhi knows it’s wrong.

If he ever verbalised the exact emotions he feels about Shangjue, chances are he’d be excommunicated from the family. He can imagine the looks of disgust and contempt; can see it in his nightmares.

He knows Shangjue gege can tell something is wrong, but how does one even begin to tell the object of your affections that you love them in the romantic way that begs to burn down any bridge that could cultivate it back into familiar familial feelings?

Loss of his gege is unacceptable. The only thing left for Yuanzhi is to sing it.

All or nothing, I give all of you 

The auditorium shakes with the force of the audience’s cheers. Ah Yue, Jin Fan, and Jin Fu all clamour around him to wrap him up in a hug before they take a bow to the standing ovation they receive.

Yuanzhi turns back to the spot in the shadow and has to kill the bud of disappointment that starts to flower. He doesn’t have a right to feel that way, no.

So, he accepts the applause with a smile, bows politely and jogs backstage where Zishang jie is squealing and pulling him into a rib cracking hug before she jumps right into Jin Fan’s arms.

“Are you alright?” Ah Yue asks, a hand on his wrist. Outside, the next group takes their place in the spotlight. Yuanzhi nods, moving quickly to where they’d stash their bags and cases.

He feels sick.

What was he doing thinking that Shangjue ge was even here tonight? More than that, what the hell was he even dreaming about that Gege would even understand that this song is dedicated to him?

He stuffs his guitar back into its case, snapping it shut and gathering his bag.

“I’ll see you guys on Monday ok?”

“Hey, where are you going?” Jin Fu frowns. “They haven’t announced the winners!”

Yuanzhi can only shake his head and plaster on a weak grin. “I…”

“He’s coming home with me.”

Yuanzhi thinks his soul jumped right out of him and into the underworld. Literal chills start breaking out down his spine when Shangjue gege steps confidently forward and wordlessly takes his school bag. Sliding their palms together, he tangles their fingers, guiding him away and out of the backstage area.

“Gege, what are you—“

“My Didi gave me a ticket to his school’s talent show. Did you think I was going to miss it?”

Yuanzhi wisely keeps his mouth shut.

Shangjue scoffs, weaving them through a sea of performers and their assortment of props and costumes. In no time, Yuanzhi is breathing in a lungful of cool, crisp night air, but gege doesn’t stop and he stumbles a little to keep up.

“Gege—“

“Get in the car,” Shangjue says, letting go of him to move to the driver’s side. When Yuanzhi doesn’t immediately follow, he turns, sighing. Coming back to Yuanzhi, he cups him by the cheek.

Running his thumb over his cheekbone, Gege purses his lips. “We need to have a conversation and I’d rather we do it in the car.”

Yuanzhi numbly tips his head, looking down on the asphalt of the school parking lot while Shangjue manoeuvres the guitar case off him and into the back of his Jaguar, and then shuffles him into the front passenger seat, buckling him in with a smooth practiced motion.

Panic and trepidation sits thick on his tongue.

“Where do you want to start?” Shangjue says over the hum of the car’s engine as he takes them out of the parking lot and into the main road.

“I don’t even know where to do that,” Yuanzhi admits. He starts to fidget with his fingers, stilling with a start when Shangjue gege takes his hand into his own again. Deftly switching lanes, Yuanzhi watched the streetlights wash over the dark interior of the car in measured intervals.

“You’re my Didi,” Gege says. “I’m your Gege. It’s as simple as that.”

The words twist something sour in his chest. It’s the undeniable truth and one he can’t even run away from no matter how hard he tries to.

“Yeah.” Yuanzhi mumbles. Squeezing Gege’s hand he makes to pull away, only for Shangjue to hold on tightly.

Shangjue’s eyes are focused on the road. Cool and calm as he safely merges the car into the evening traffic.

“Yuanzhi, once again you’re hearing and not listening.”

Not a little offended, Yuanzhi tries to pry his hand out of Shangjue’s only to fail miserably when his gege huffs.

“I know you love me.”

Yuanzhi blinks owlishly, brain shorting out at the soft smile that Shangjue gege sports when he inches the car forward.

“Did you think I wasn’t listening?”

“I didn’t know what to think,” Yuanzhi manages. Shangjue’s hand squeezes his thrice.

A gentle quiet settles in the hush of the car. It’s not unpleasant, more so when Shangjue carefully lifts their hands to his lips. The gesture sends a thrill down Yuanzhi’s spine, especially when he lets go only to change gears, then sliding their hands back together again.

“I was going to wait until you’re a little older to broach the topic. I didn’t…” Shangjue trails off, throat bobbing. “I didn’t want it to seems like I was pressuring you into anything…”

Yuanzhi feels his cheeks warm.

“You wouldn’t have—“

“But I would have.” Shangjue cuts with certainty. “You wouldn’t have been anything but willing and that’s what makes it dangerous.”

Carefully, with an infinite tenderness Yuanzhi was sure he could never pour into another person, Yuanzhi whispers, “And yet I would have loved you.”

Shangjue turns to him. “I won’t apologise for making you wait.”

“How long?”

Shangjue blinks, confusion colouring his brow. “How long?”

“How long do I have to wait?” Yuanzhi elaborates. “How long until you will be comfortable with… this?”

The laughter that bubbles up in the car makes him smile. His heart settles in the sound of it, then picks up again at the way Shangjue looks at him syrup soft with an intensity that Yuanzhi now has a name for.

“Get into your top choice for university and then we will talk.”

Yuanzhi smiles. “Do you promise, Ge?”

“All or nothing, Didi.” Shangjue replies easily, running his thumb over the back of Yuanzhi’s hand.

[bisexualshakespeare]

Twenty questions for fic writers

thanks for the tag @lowkeyed1!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 53 without my podfic only works

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 195,236

3. What fandoms do you write for? According to my front page, the fandoms I write the most for are Haven (7) Ted Lasso (6) Fandom - Fandom (6) Teen Wolf (5) Our Flag Means Death & Willow (4)

I'm fine with Haven being my number one but I'd like to bump Teen Wolf off there. My Willow fic will overtake it soon but I still need another fandom to push it off completely!

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

A Wedding of Errors - Teen Wolf, Allison/Lydia, Rated T - Wedding Planner AU and my first (and only?) Big Bang fic! It had beautiful at and I still follow the artist though it looks like the post got deleted in a blog rebrand or something.

Not a Rebound - Supergirl, Winn/James, Rated E - Post season 2 episode 1 smut I wrote to make myself feel better after they nerfed Kara/James for no reason! (we know the reason 😑)

No Time Like the Present - Young Justice, Jamie/Bart, Rated G - Short little future fic of Bart having a panic attack and Jamie helping him out. First time I wrote something and was like wow that was like writing writing!

Uninvited - Elementary, Gen Sherlock & Watson - pod together project I had to ask for a co-writer to help pinch hit this for me because I was struggling. It was strange to co-write, especially with a stranger, but it was interesting and the podficcers seemed to have fun!

ShapeShift - Teen Wolf, Stiles/Danny, Rated T - AU based on a Bollywood movie I found on Netflix and became obsessed with called Pyaar Impossible. Also a pod together project!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Sometimes. I like that ao3 has the unread comments on your front page, so I like to keep them there so I can see them and smile at them when I'm scrolling through the suggested marked for later stuff. If someone has commented multiple times, I'll usually thank them on the most recent one rather than replying to all of them. Of course if someone asks a question I'll answer. Otherwise it depends on my mood.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? I was gonna say I try not to leave fics on too an angsty note but then I remembered Garder le Silence my Harry Potter pod together that's an episode of Potterwatch during book 7. It's pretty moody all the way through.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? Probably A Wedding of Errors. It's the only fic with an epilogue so you actually have a little time after the couple gets together. Hmm should I write more epilogues? 🤔

8. Do you get hate on fics? I got an angry comment on Wedding saying it was a bad f/f fic because I spend too much time on the side m/m/m love triangle. Honestly that was something I was worried about and if the person had just been disappointed, I would've understood but they were just mean so fuck em.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? a little! increasingly more so last month lol some light d/s, with a lot of silliness and communication

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? nah I don't love the idea of crossovers. Usually I'd rather have a full AU

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? i don't think so?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes! Wedding was translated into Russian in 2015, two years after I wrote it and the translator made a little banner for it!

😭 it is so crazy to think someone thought about my fic so much they put it in another language! I am in awe of them. Umi no Iruka you can ask anything of me. You can throw me into battle like a pokemon. I am in your debt.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Just Uninvited!

14. What's your all-time favorite ship? Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku from My Hero Academia. I have never written a fic for them and I probably never will. It's a classic case of, if I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more. 🥺

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? Hmm well I don't usually post anything unless I've finished it. I did start a series of fics for a glee rare pair but I am nOT going back to that. I have the last installment in my Winn gets fucked series like 90% done I literally just need them to fuck and I can post it. I have a couple Haven WIPs I probably won't go back to unless the hyperfixation comes back in a big way.

16. What are your writing strengths? Dialogue, calling back to things earlier in the fic, estimating the word count of a story, which I didn't think was a strength but lowkeyed said it was their weakness so i guess!

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Description of places blegh, coming up with events for people to do between plot points, describing how people move and gesture? I can see things so clearly in my head it's so hard to describe! it's like "and then they do the face they did in episode 6 where they were like hmnmm you know??" impossible! I should've become an artist!

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? I would love to if I knew the language well enough but unfortunately I'm english only. I've thrown in a few lines sparingly but I think there's definitely some cool stuff that can happen if it's used right by someone who understands the language well.

19. First fandom you wrote for? I think Jimmy Neutron? I got into fandom young lol

20. Favorite fic you've written? Whatever I'm currently working on is my favorite! I love creating so much and I'm ecstatic imagining all the scenarios and tweaking them over and over and living in their heads and surprising myself when I come up with things I didn't plan! So by that measure my favorite is my unpublished Cyrano inspired romcom but if we're going published, I of course have to go with Multivocal, my heart ❤️ or perhaps A Familiar Sound, my soul! ✨

Tagging @secrets-of-luftnarp @lawlessferalgay @lichfucker @caseycassidy

[katsudondom]

I need to vent, sorry

long post incoming :)

↓

Yeah, I feel that I was born in the wrong generation

And no, I don't think I'm special or anything for saying that.

Like, do people think I want to feel like an outcast whenever I'm around a group of people that are the same age as me? Because I'd trade my interests and niches any day if it meant I could finally feel what it's like to have a group of friends by my side, or a partner holding my hand.

And yes, I do have many criticisms about certain aspects of modern technology and social media, but I don't downright hate it or dismiss the good that came from modern technology/the Internet entirely. If anything, I'd love to be born when the Internet was just starting to walk, when it wasn't as popular yet and when you were considered a nerd for even owning a computer. That'd be an amazing time to be alive, until "normies" (cant find a better word sorry I know it's cringe) started making the Internet more mainstream and later on it being the #1 reason why Americans are more stupid and self-centered then ever (in my personal opinion).

I'm more so disconnected with my generation because of the culture, not modern technology.. A generation where we believe in anything without doing any research or seeing different perspectives first, a generation that's easily brainwashed into believing anything, a generation that's so sure that their opinion is right that they'll even ruin someone else's life or ridicule them into oblivion just because the other person thinks differently. That's the reason why I feel like I don't belong with my generation, not because "ew social media".

Actually, that's not the whole reason why-

I also really just love the grunge/rock culture of the 90's, and the scene/emo culture of the early 2000's. It all felt like a community back then, like wherever you were at there'd be people accepting you with open arms, no matter who you were or what you looked like, ready to have you join their clique people that just liked the same shit as you do.

Nowadays, there doesn't even feel like a community anymore, even within your own culture. Everyone's divided, everyone's prejudice, and everyone can't put their differences aside and at least co-exist with each other. This "you're with me or against me" mentality is getting old real fast. Instead, let's have thoughtful and provoking conversations with each other, instead of being quick to go on social media and wishing ill to the white kid in your History class just because he wore a red hat that you happened to disagree with.

Idk, it's all just really silly.

I was just scrolling down watching YouTube when I saw a video calling people like me who think they're in the wrong generation "annoying" and I had to vent since it actually triggered me a bit, ngl, because just by looking at the thumbnail where they put a bunch of modern technologies and had "modern" in bold letters with the word being crossed out, I knew what points they were going to make, and I just needed to vent about how not everyone who feels like an outcast is trying so hard to be different.... It's 99% the complete opposite and I just always hated that stereotype from people who obviously have it way better in life, from people who clearly don't understand what it's like to be almost invisible even when you try so hard to be liked/seen to the point where you fantasize about a time you weren't even born in because "what if?".

Shit, I'm done, needed to get that off my chest and the only way I'd feel good about it is by posting it online. Scared to put tags on this because half of the criticisms about Gen Z that I wrote about relate to about 99% of Tumblr users, so I might piss someone off but fuck it, I want my voice to be heard and no one will probably care to read this anyway.

And yes, I know there's other teens/young adults out there like me, who has the same mindset as I do. I don't think that I'm the only special snowflake that feels this way, but it's so fucking hard finding someone who sees the world the same way as I do, that it does make me feel a bit like I am the only one.

Anyway,

Goodnight 🖤

[broomsticks]

you tackled that tonks/lily post so gently, so elegantly, I am in awe. (also I wrote tonks / lily for efficiency sake but I do think it would be an interesting ship to explore!). for me - my priority in HP is sibling relationships tbh and FRIENDS. like I wrote a romance and 80% of it was about platonic relationships. also - I dislike how people are like 'mlm is for straight women!' and erase the fact that so many women writing mlm are queer (that was in a reply re: wolfstar), as shown by statistics (which you probably have, you are so clever!)

ahhh thank you that means a lot! glad my hard-earned wisdom from my (one year's 😂) long experience shipping both remadora and wolfstar is coming in handy LMAO. but seriously - fandom Means Something to so many people and that's wonderful, that shared passion and excitement and joy and connection and vulnerability, but the flip side of that, when it means different things to different people, the "why don't you see this the way i do?" / "how can you not care about this as much as i do?" / "why does this not mean the same thing to you as it does to me?" hits so much harder. i get it, it's a horrid feeling!

but i've realized that what often comes across as remadora bashing/ erasure from some wolfstar folks is really them trying to say, in maybe not so many words, that canon acknowledgement / a happy ending for wolfstar would really have meant a lot to me, and therefore i am creating in fic what i would have wanted to see on the shelf/on the screen, just these small ordinary happinesses that's been denied same-sex couples over and over and over and over, in mainstream media and in real life.

and conversely, often what remadora shippers are trying to say is that remus and tonks, individually and together, mean a lot to me too, and so it hurts to see tonks' character sidelined/ assassinated even more than it already was in the books, it hurts to see it repeatedly insinuated that just because it's het m/f makes it automatically less queer, less 'cool,' less valid, less worthy of thoughtful consideration and affirmation and celebration, especially now that canon is long dead and buried and the fandom has really become its own thing.

(i don't know the jegulus and jily fandoms well enough to say, but.. you get the idea)

are gay people and same-sex relationships discriminated against? absolutely. are women a marginalized group? for sure. what about bi people, especially bi folk in m/f relationships? oh gosh don't get me started.

but. one side claims misogyny, the other claims homophobia, something something 'protecting male friendships,' something something biphobia, … it's tiring. it's the oppression olympics and i'm not about that (especially in this fandom! this fandom!!! of all places!). i'm tired. everyone has scars and hurts and is just trying to have a nice relaxing self-indulgent time. i would love for more people to read/write femslash, fic about the actually unlikable or morally complicated characters, and dark fic, but more than that i want people to enjoy themselves and be happy in fandom! ship and let ship. write whatever you want. don't want to read it? don't read it. fandom is for joy and silliness and fun. and for writing and gifting me james/lily/peter fic, obviously 😊

OKAY WOW SOAPBOX. i have feelings about ship wars, especially of the political moralizing and activism sort.

-#-

anyway yes gen fic is another area that's so hard to find a community for. AO3 already does better than most in having the & tag (the platonic 'regulus & sirius' made it into the top 10 tags of fics written last year! amazing) but it's inconsistently tagged: this first war longfic i'm currently reading, Power the Dark Lord Knows Not, is far more sirius & james and sirius & regulus, heck even remus & peter and sirius & peter, than it is wolfstar, but the slash ship is the only one tagged -- this is a delightfully chaotic minerva & peeves oneshot that's not tagged -- and ... even if it IS tagged, who really goes looking for remus & professor binns fanfiction? i'm a little sad that genuary never really came back after that first year too. ah well.

-#-

also hahahaha yes the stats you want are here. these stats are from 2013. 2013. imagine how different they probably look now, and in this defiantly queer section of the HP fandom at that.

[dunysims]

my first tag in one of these EVER, thank you @wileyfern

rules: answer the questions and tag 9 people you want to get to know better

favorite color: without a doubt green!! but deep blue has a hold on me for some reason too

sweet, spicy, or savory: love everything spicy

tea or coffee: i prefer tea, coffe makes me sleepy (lol)

craving: chips

last series you watched: shameless season 8

currently reading: ima be honest im reading a daryl dixon x oc novel on wattpad, its actually good, follows the twd history but adds this silly little things with daryl, good good

working on: what to do with my bellingham legacy!! i love them but they are just gen 2 and they're 8 siblings, gen 3 has 1 teen, 2 children and 1 toddler. i've been thinking about making sawyer my gen 2 heir and start posting about his life after he gets out of jail, with little cameos of his siblings of course because i can't just erase all the history they have together, but mostly just sawyer life (and past too). i'm also working on sawyer's future love interest so yeah

idk who i should tag either, lets see if i remember the alphabet

@alcearosea-sims @breezytrait @cerubean @deadlytrait @hibarisims @its-adrienpastel @joaquinlechien @katesimblr @mujori

[nonbinaryeye]

are you a troll blog? sorry im autistic and i really struggle to tell the difference when people just dont break keyfabe at all /gen

No, not at all. If I was not serious about some of the statements I was making I would use the the tone indicator /. If you doubt me you can scroll through my blog and tags and see that I'm on tumblr for a while and engage with several fandoms, reblogging stuff, writting metas, posting silly jokes, writing fanfics and such.

I feel like you are asking this because of the "what is MoralIntern allegory for" post? Because I want to make it clear that I do not really think it's supposed to be metaphor for either EU or UN and yes I really do believe it's metaphor for USSR.

As thus appears to be controversial I'm planning to better explain my claims but also I'm open to discussion and I would be curious to read reasoning on why would someone assume it is about EU.

[mirpkechi]

THAMK YOY SO MUCH MIRORO SOBS <//3 apparebtly i have no other real value than being a joke emu wonderhoy emo otori omg haha look it’s emu

currently watching them make memes of the gc and i’m in literally none of them so i . posted some salty passive agressive memes about my effort being worthless or sum and some of them just went “this is so me” like bro no that’s not the point i’m begging for attention

jfhgjf vebting on disc is not enough atp when everyone ignores it there

who the FUCK. anon i'm on my way to beat the fuck outta them. you don't deserve that at all, i love you. ♡

i know who you are, anon, but i won't tag with your specific tag just to keeo that sense of anonymity. if you'd like,, we can always talk on our sideblogs ♡ i love you dearly, and you're so fucking strong.

this post will be a much longer ramble because i have many feelings about this specific situation, and i feel like i actually can talk about it, being someone who has been through this whole thing too [fairly recently]. anon, you're so strong for this, genuinely. ♡

as i mentioned before, i've also been through the exact thing, almost to the very point, and it truly fucking hurts so, so much, when you get boiled down to the "happy-go-lucky & silly" person in the group and being brushed aside as if you were nothing but the "comic relief" in the group [in my case, i felt boiled down to just one half of the "silly loud emukasa duo",, and it hurts so, so much to have a group of "friends" that really never cared to get to know you].

it gets tiring, doesn't it ? when you feel as if you have no use other than being a source of "entertainment" for them. maybe not in the literal sense of the word, but moreso in the sense that you only feel needed when you interject to make some kind of joke and keep up the façade of being the silly friend [yet when you actually start a conversation, suddenly nobody wants to talk, do they ?].

i'm assuming our friend groups were very, very similar [minus the fact that i'm assuming yours is an online group, whereas mine is a mix of irls and online "friends" ? correct me if i'm wrong, anon ♡], in the sense that everyone had an "assigned" proseka character — with those who chose which character was assigned to each person deeming themselves to be "complex" characters like mafuyu or ena, and then assigning you to be emu because, yet again, emu's just the loud, dumb-happy character, of course !!

i don't think they realise how complex emu is, do they ? people compare mafuyu and emu as if they were polar opposites, yet they truly aren't that different, are they ? i hate the dumbificatiob of emu so, so much. she isn't just the loud, forever bright character, and you know that. the way that they condense you into just that, it makes you want to keep the act up, right ? but i promise you that it's okay to let it down and that, around the right people, you can truly be yourself ♡ even if it's just on your sideblog, that's okay ♡

in my experience, i felt almost as if it was expected of me, to "not be capable of any negative emotions", and it just. it feels so invalidating, doesn't it ? feeling as if you're doing this because it's an established role of yours. the invalidation hurts even more when you feel like you have to keep up a persona that no one even realises that you have to perform, just to not inconvenience them. you're doing so, so well and i really love you. /gen /p

as for the "making memes of the gc whilst leaving you out" part . . . i'm not too sure as to how to help in a healthy way. over the past week [?], i've seen my own so-called friends make memes whilst excluding emu / kohane [thr characters they see me as], or straight up placing a different friend into the role of emu. i'm not sure how to help, but god do i know what it's like, and it truly does just crush you, realising that you no longer matter, or that you aren't seen as "worthwhile" to them. i'm so, so sorry, anon. you deserve so much better, and please trust me when i say that i would give you the world if it could make things any better. ♡

i honestly don't get why people reply to /personal/ vents / pleas for help with "oh lmao so me fr",, it's so invalidating, and it really does just make you feel even worse. there's a difference between using your own personal anecdotes and trying to foster a sense of understanding between you and the person who's venting, and then just being cruel and making it all about you, and actively ignoring what the person is trying to say.

you truly are such a good person, anon, and like i've said already, you don't deserve any of this. even if we've only known each other for what, a few weeks now ? you're still a person i consider such a close friend, and you really do mean a lot to me. maybe we can suffer through our crumbling friend groups together lol [crude attempt at a joke].

but in all seriousness, i hope life treats you well from now on. i don't fucking care how much people try to make friend group troubles seem inferior to romantic relationship struggles, because friendship issues can hurt so, so much, especially when you feel as if it's your fault [trust me when i say that i know you've not done anything wrong. some people are just cruel, and i'm so sorry that they have hurt you like this. ♡♡]. i hope life is easy on you, and that you can rest as much as you need to. please drink water and make sure you're eating every day, and that goes to both anon and anyone who managed to read all of this. i love you dearly ♡ /gen /p