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sanguinarius-archive · 5 years ago

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Hey! Could I get to know some of your headcanons about dickfigures/your designs for them? :D

ya ya sure!!!!

i already have my designs for them up if you havent seen, here they are!

as for headcanons idk how long this post will be so ill just add a read more for anyone who might not wanna scroll thru it all lol

red!!!!!

his real name is rowan bc i thought it was cute, also it means “little red one” which is eVEN BETTER

he’s nonbinary masc and bisexual! the self projection is REAL

he has adhd

most of my headcanons kinda flow into my own version of dick figures because i’m not very Satisfied with canon NJSJDNSKM so like. for example red doesn’t just kill people or whatever. he gets into fights and has scars and wears bandaids a lot bc of them

he graduated college with blue, he got a bachelor’s degree in fine arts (honestly idk how college works bc im a grade 10 baby so if thats like totally wrong just let me know also im. canadian so idk how american school system works LOL)

red got suspended a lot in high school but never expelled. mostly bc he got in fights that were mainly him protecting stacey from shitty people (he sees her as his sister so he was rlly protective) and the school wasnt really sure what else to do so they just. you know. suspended him a bunch of times hoping itd do something but it didnt

he hates his dad! reason being is bc when he was born, his dad was actually an alien able to disguise himself as human, so he wanted to take red back to his home planet cuz red turned out to be more powerful than anything his dad had ever seen. but red’s mom was like Nope, so she snuck out with him and his plush cat (kitty amazing) and they were never found. red is very close with his mom and is scared of his dad coming back someday

we know he canonically likes rlly loud music so im just gonna project here and say he’s a metalhead. at least, some form of it. he likes the alt scene music and industrial rock. examples being deftones, nine inch nails, skinny puppy, rage against the machine, kittie and others. it keeps him focused and calm

bLUE!!!

we know blue was bullied as a kid but i dont wanna say red also bullied him bc i feel like thats just wrong to me? MAYBE ITS NOT ACTUALLY but it just makes me sad so like. lets say red, being as protective as he is, stood up for blue a lot cuz he was like “oh this kid cant fight” so he knew what to do

blue dated pink for awhile but they mutually agreed to break up after blue realized this wasnt what he wanted (he came to the conclusion that he was gay, well, he knew for awhile but it was Internalized Homophobia)

he grew up in a very conservative family so to see the world completely differently by meeting red, ems (lt), pink and stacey was a very good thing for him. unfortunately even tho his family did love him, it was conditional so they stopped talking to him after he came out. thankfully he’d already graduated high school by that point

despite being emotional blue isn’t very good at understanding how he’s an emotional person. he’s able to distinct one feeling from another and analyze them, but it’s just... hard for him to kind of. process WHY he feels a certain way? which is what’s led to a lot of his struggles in getting closer with ppl

he loooves reading and writing we already know this but i mean come on. he also got a bachelor’s degree in english/ela. so he’s able to become a teacher ig but he doesn’t really want to? at least not for awhile yet

blue was ems’ first friend. at first he couldn’t understand why they had tics but decided he shouldn’t get into someone else’s business. he didn’t find it weird, just cool!

he and red would always pair up for projects if they had classes together!!!!!! blue would do the writing/research and red would do the illustrations. they always turned out really good even if it ended with red cramming it at the last minute

surprisingly hates broseph more than red. well i mean its not surprising, because broseph was always a huge DICK to him

blue’s real name is wyatt!!!!! i forget the meaning but i felt the sound of it and the meaning fit him well

piiiiink!!!!!!!!!!

she’s still in college, getting her doctorate to be an astrophysicist!

pink is very very smart and will help anyone who’s struggling with something in school. she was basically the genius who always got in the honor roll every year. but, she actually was really anxious especially with exams

pink encourages stacey to go back to school, and sometimes stacey does, but she always ends up leaving again. it’s a little stressful but pink has hope for her

she’s never drank one sip of alcohol in her entire life. she smoked weed once, but it felt weird so she didn’t do it again

ever since she and blue broke up she’s been very supportive of him bc she herself is bisexual!!! so she sees nothing weird about it. in fact, about almost a year later she started dating stacey

pink’s real name is lily. when she became friends with blue she met red through him and she was like “can i join your nickname thing” and they said “sure” so they called her pink. stacey sometimes calls her pinky or just pink but mostly lily

pink helped red with academics. even tho he was sometimes insufferable to work with (/j thats a Joke i promise she’s a very patient person) she didn’t give up on him!!!! in return he helped her out with some fitness stuff cuz pink was always insecure about gym, and later when she graduated she actually got into exercising bc of red!

she loves travelling and going for walks. she owns a lot of houseplants and she’s given them all names and takes very good care of them! she also owns an albino ball python named Velvet

STACEYYY!!!!!!!

stacey is nOT actually all about sex this time ok. i don’t like that. i mean she did have some personality in canon but it wasn’t much? anyways she just really likes to express herself thru tight/”risque” clothing like fishnets and leather and pleated skirts and thigh-highs and platform boots, all of that. basically she’s a goth girl but doesn’t really “act” like one

she’s really intelligent when it comes to animals and insects and will tell you anything you need to know. when she goes back to college she gets a degree in environmental science

stacey can play the electric and bass guitars!!!! she was in a band back in high school but it never really went anywhere beyond performances at parties in someone’s garage. not that she didn’t like it, looking back on it makes her feel happy, but she wished it continued. probably why she has a hard time going back to college bc she’s not sure what she really wants

stacey is a trans woman btw!!!!! unfortunately it was a little difficult in high school to be who she was bc some kids were jerks, but there were a lot of others who supported her which is good

she views red as her brother as well and they still hang out a lot

i haven’t really had time to focus on stacey and make headcanons and stuff for her so i don’t have a lot but... let’s say, secretly, she’s a scifi nerd. and for the sake of debate, let’s say she’s a marvel fan. if you count being a fan of deadpool as being a fan of marvel

LOVES GIRLS.... loves pink!!!

has very similar music taste to red’s!!!!!

emssss!!!!!!! (lt)

instead of being a stereotype of ppl with tourette’s syndrome, it’s just a normal thing that isn’t focused on a whole lot. it doesn’t make ems swear but if they get really really frustrated they’ll curse while doing one of their tics

ems is agender, i’d say they’re also ageless but i don’t really want to make them too “nonhuman” because i feel like that’s dehumanizing to people with tourette’s. so let’s just say most laws of existence don’t apply to them

they’re very friendly!

they’re an aspiring musician, just like in canon

ems is also big into horror movies believe it or not. they’re pretty critical of them though like most horror movie fans, and only like specific ones (i’m not a horror movie fan myself so i can’t say what Specific Ones they like ajsdhbjn just imagine they have good taste okay)

they r very artsy too and like doing crafts cause it gives them something to focus on. it’s just a hobby though it’s not something they’re Professional at

they love nature and flowers and trees and all kinds of plants and animals!!! they like to document what they see when they travel thru nature and stuff so they bring a camera with them (and their phone, but, you know whatever)

ems was never really affected by things people said to them regarding their syndrome. to them it was something they were born with, so they couldn’t bother to feel bad about themselves. in certain situations theyre able to control it but 90% of the time they don’t care about what ppl think

aaaand there u go!!! as for minor characters like raccoon, jason/trollz0r, broseph, dingleberry, they all exist (raccoon isnt a racist stereotype tho), i just dont focus on them a whole lot. most of my hcs for stacey and ems here were thought up on the spot since i havent had time to lay out all my ideas for them but i hope what i have here is good !!!!

also, red and blue ARE dating, and pink and stacey ARE ALSO dating. gay rights

#asks #dick figures #Anonymous

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queermediastudies · 5 years ago

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Intertwined Stories on Homosexual Issues

The Hours is a drama film directed by Stephen Daldry. The movie was released in United States on December 18, 2002, and won Oscar Award in the same year. It tells the inextricable connection between three women in different eras. To be honest, it is a deeply depressing and shocked Montage movie, which shows the different reaction made by three heroines, Virginia Woolf, Laura Brown, and Clarissa Vaughan, when facing same social and psychology pressure brought by gay and lesbian issues. By showing those stories, The Hours shows audiences how different people make their choice when facing death problems on homosexual issues: Escaping through death, meekly accepting, or getting rid of the pass. Although The Hours’s major concerns do not maintain colored gays or lesbian groups, it is a good movie which using Montage structure to guide its audiences to a broader real-life concept.

Virginia Woolf is a talented author, lived in a countryside in Britain in 1920s. She used to live in London, but finally settled down in the countryside in order to cure her illness. Virginia herself cannot stand for such a quiet life; she is eager for living in a busy city. This repressed country life made Virginia breathless, and her homosexual identity gradually revealed: she kissed her sister in her house. Being gay or lesbian was actually illegal in England at that time (Caitlin, 2015). I consider this kiss as the way Virginia recognizes and expresses herself in her repressed daily life, which is similar with the “coming out” process in homophile movement throughout the 1950 and into the 1960, when “the individual realization that one was homosexual, and the acknowledgment of this sexual identity to other gay people.”(Gross, 2002) Virginia’s self-conscious also start the plot that she persuaded her husband to move back to London latter in the movie. A plot at the beginning of Virginia’s story shows her fight ended in failure: She drowned herself into the river in the countryside. Perhaps Virginia’s homosexual identity isn’t recognized by the society, in the following years, she went back to the quiet countryside and suicide in despair.

Laura is a typical housewife with a lovely son. She lived in the Los Angeles in 1950s, shortly after the end of World War II, when men returned to ordinary life with the honor in battlefield. Unlike others, Laura seems to be laden with anxiety; she was trapped in her dully life. It was Virginia’s novel, Mrs. Dalloway, resonated her to yearn for a new life style. When Laura’s friend came to visit her, she imitated Virginia and kiss her female friend. Her friend avoided contact with Laura latter on since homophobia, which makes Laura totally disappointed. She threw the unfinished birthday cake she made for her husband into the garbage can and wanted to give up her life as well. Laura wanted to suicide just like the story in Mrs. Dalloway. But in the end, she gave up and returned to her normal life. Laura has an intersectionality identity, not only as a white middle class lesbian, but also as a tender mother and a virtuous wife. In the heteronormativity concept in the society, Laura cannot only live for herself, she needs to be responsible for her family and fix into the family role, although they are contrary to her sexual orientation and personal willingness. Warner once stated how heterosexuality social mainstream shapes personal living way, “Het culture thinks of itself as the elemental form of human association, as the very model of intergender relations, as the indivisible basis of all community, and as the means of reproduction without which society wouldn't exist”, “Materialist thinking about society has in many cases reinforced these tendencies, inherent in heterosexual ideology, toward a totalized view of the social.” (Warner, 1993) Laura cannot ignore her child and husband’s expectation for her. Finally, Laura remade the birthday cake, celebrated birthday night with her husband, and continued her dully and hopeless life.

Relatively speaking, Clarissa Vaughan’s story is the best among three heroines. Clarissa is an editor who felt in love with Richard Brown, a gay writer with AIDS. Clarissa took good care of Richard every day, and considered that her life is meaningful only by staying around Richard. Richard, on the other hand, suffered from AIDS, disliked and scared by all his friends except Clarissa due to his disease. The only reason for him to keep alive is Clarissa. This type of living style is not what Clarissa and Relatively wanted, they just created cages for each other. The audiences can see how Clarissa wanted to get rid of it and started a new life, from the plot she cried alone in the kitchen. Finally, Richard jumped out of the window to stop Clarissa spending more time on him, and force Clarissa to start her new life. Although Clarissa was in heartbreaking sadness, she finally got rid of the past and started her new life.

Besides of the story, there are a lot of details and metaphors among the movie in order to make the it more lively and real to audiences. For example, Virginia’s sustained anxiety state and her unconscious action of biting the bottom of the pen when writing; Laura’s confused and unconfident mental state as well as the birthday ceremony cake she made twice; Clarissa’s messy hairstyle and her anger when Richard giving up himself. Although The Hours organized in Montage way, which lenses frequently switch form plots to plots, it brings a smooth viewing experience since the emotion between plots are identical and well organized. Those stories focused on the life of heroines, rather than any specific queer issues, which also claimed by Goltz et al, “‘To come out as me and not to highlight his sexuality, preferring to ‘talk about me, about my life, not about my queer life” (Goltz et al, 2016).

Although The Hours tells a great story of the death problems that queer people are facing among different period of time, it seems that its major concerns are all white people. The Hours failed to represent any living situation of black gay and lesbian people. While according to the report of UCLA, African-American take up about 12% of LGBTQ group nowadays. (The Williams Institute, 2019). The public’s losing attracted on colored skin people may cause them faced misrepresentative and misunderstanding. According to Ludmila Leiva’s words, “As a queer person who is also a person of color, watching television is a fraught experience for me. Constantly, I find myself searching for characters whose stories mirror my own and, repeatedly, I come up empty-handed. I am forced to accept the few, tiny fragments reflecting my own lived experiences that I can find scattered across today’s TV offerings, but I am tired. I long desperately for television writers, producers, and networks to prioritize the centering of human experiences beyond the conventional, and I know I am not alone.” (Ludmila, 2017)

Obviously, the experience of queer people in color is different than the white, but only a few people notice it in TV and film industry. Existing media works cannot represent them in the correct way, which will create unfair treatment toward those minority groups. The phenomenon of lacking colored queer concepts in The Hours and other media projects still need time to improve.

As a Chinese citizen, I must say that this movie shocked me a lot. CPC is harmonizing Chinese online environment, concepts like LGBTQ rarely appeared in Chinese public view. It is scary how many Chinese male and female actually living their daily life just like Virginia Woolf, Laura Brown, or Clarissa Vaughan. From my personal perspective, the most desperate story in The Hours is Laura’s one, she cannot ignore her child and husband’s expectation for her, thus she needs to keep living along with dull and hopeless life in the rest of her life. Happened to know that from Chinese perspective, Confucianism create a great heteronormativity for both man and woman to obey their role.

In general, I think The Hours is a great film to appreciation and analysis. Montage itself is a great way to guide the audience's mood and enlighten them to think more. By using Montage, the director maximizing the tension while guaranteed the integrity of his film. Moreover, the juxtaposition and intersection of Virginia Woolf, Laura Brown, and Clarissa Vaughan’s stories cause tension suspense throughout the entire film, and shows the relationship between each character in different places and different time period when facing the similar problem. In the end of the film when all three stories come to the end, the sense of shock comes continuously to force me think more outside the movie’s concept into the reality.

Works Cited

Gallagher, C. (2019). Was It Illegal to Be Gay In 1920s England Or Is Thomas Barrow's Struggle On 'Downton' Just About Cultural Pressure?. [online] Bustle. Available at: https://www.bustle.com/articles/62849-was-it-illegal-to-be-gay-in-1920s-england-or-is-thomas-barrows-struggle-on-downton [Accessed 27 Oct. 2019].

Gross, L. P. (2002). Up from invisibility: lesbians, gay men, and the media in America. New York: Columbia University Press.

Goltz, D. B., Zingsheim, J., Mastin, T., & Murphy, A. G. (2016). Discursive negotiations of Kenyan LGBTI identities: Cautions in cultural humility. Journal of International and Intercultural Communication, 9(2).

Leiva, L. (2019). TV Is Getting More Progressive, But It's Still Failing Queer People of Color. [online] Bustle. Available at: https://www.bustle.com/p/tv-is-getting-more-progressive-but-its-still-failing-queer-people-of-color-64520 [Accessed 25 Oct. 2019].

Warner, M. (Ed.). (1993). Fear of a queer planet: Queer politics and social theory (Vol. 6). U of Minnesota Press.

Williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu. (2019). The Williams Institute. [online] Available at: https://williamsinstitute.law.ucla.edu/visualization/lgbt-stats/?topic=SS#demographic [Accessed 30 Oct. 2019].

#QueerMedia #The Hours #coming out #heteronormativity #intersectionality identity #AIDS #Virginia Woolf #Laura Brown #Clarissa Vaughan #social mainstream

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chut-je-dors · 6 years ago

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5TL ask masterpost

Hi!!! Since there are SO many. SO SO many asks about 5TL in my inbox right now, I thought of (instead of working on a crucial uni deadline I have coming up) putting them all here and writing one long-arse post (so that people’s dashes won’t be..... overwhelmed with asks. Also less tagging). So here we go - Hopefully you get your answers here! Consider it as a fic........... it’s that long. Starting from the oldest!

Anonymous said: 5 thomas lane is definitely, without a doubt, my favourite ever fic. Its bloody brilliant!! I just wanted to ask, we know dave got people being rude about john and paul, and then the incident in the supermarket, but do vera and chuck ever get any shit at school about their dads? Or do other parents ever have a go at paul and john? Love the fic, honestly its my favourite thing. Its absolutely wonderful 💞💞💞

Thank you!! That is always such a lovely thing to hear! <3

Vera and Chuck have been thankfully mostly protected from any kind of homophobia. Chuck’s friends are too young to really care about it, they just go ‘ok’ when Chuck tells that he has two dads instead of one, and as for Vera only her close friends know. It’s not that she would’ve been treating it as a secret, but usually children at that age don’t really talk about their parents openly in class. At least I wouldn’t have been able to tell if some of my classmates had two mums, since you’d spend time in small groups instead of one bigger one, and then interact with the other people in the class only for school work. So since only her good friends know (and they don’t care) she hasn’t had to face any prejudice either.

As for Paul and John, at school events they receive a stink eye at most, since the other parents can’t possibly put up a scene in front of the kids and the teachers etc. Most of them don’t care, but there are always some who will kinda, steer their kid the other way. Paul and John fortunately are aces at dealing with the hurt feelings it causes, and Vera and Chuck are yet to notice that kind of behaviour. Dave is a little bit more perseptive, but then again he’s the oldest and unfortunately remembers some of the early encounters the family had when the world’s - and Liverpool’s - view on gay people wasn’t yet as open as it is now.

Anonymous said: 5tl question!! When j and p DO fight, who apologises first? Who sulks more? (Love this bloody fic)

Both are awful stubborn mules!! It’s terrible. But at the same time they go over the fight in their head and feel sorry about it, and then eventually one of them decides not to be an idiot anymore. But I feel that overall Paul would be less inclined to apologise first if he feels he’s right, and John will come trudging over ‘cos he can’t stand it when they fight for a long time. Then again, if John absolutely feels he’s correct, he’ll hold onto his opinion with tooth and nail, and Will Sulk. John in general sulks more I think, but half of it is tongue in cheek, since they so rarely have actual fights (more like, small-ish disputes)

Anonymous said: Okay I have a 5tl question: when it comes to the kids, which parent is each the most similar to personality-wise? Like for me, I’ve always thought Dave is like a mini Paul whereas Vera just SCREAMS John to me, what’s your opinion on this? Is this something you considered when writing the kids? <333

Oh god this is such a difficult question,, after a 20-minute discussion with @thefrogchorus, (since this was such a difficult question and I needed her blessed input to sort out my thoughts) we came to the conclusion that they’re kind of a mix of both John and Paul without any definitive traits coming from their parents (Chuck is a mini-John, but that’s also because of y’kno, being his actual biological son). They’re very much their own people in my head, but especially their manners come from John and Paul, whether it be how to win an argument, or how to deal with sadness, etc.

I actually feel like Vera takes after Paul, in a way that when she puts her foot down, she’ll go through fucking stone if needs be, and Paul is very similar to that. Their sense of humour comes from both Paul and John, but I feel like they appreciate the sort of “silliness” John seems to cultivate a bit more.

Anonymous said: Can you tell us more about George and Ringo from 5TL? How did they end up together and what kinda dynamic does their relationship have? :)

George and Ringo met when Paul inherited the cottage from his grandparents back in 1998. George would come along to help rebuilding the cottage which was in a complete shambles. For the first two years Paul, John and George would sleep in a guest room at the farm since the cottage was inhabitable. In the mornings the four of them, since they quickly started getting along with Ringo, skipped over the field that separates the farm and the cottage and they’d work on the cottage all day long.

As was said in chp. 5, “The four of them got along swimmingly right from the first moment, and the very nice lad’s good-natured, calm farm-boy attitude completed the group in a strangely perfect way.“ “George started helping at the cottage very often, as well.”

So George and Ringo really got to know each other and fell in love during that time. There’s gonna be a chapter eventually that goes over these events, so I’m not going to delve too deep into it now, and some details might change over time, so that’s what you’re gonna have to do with for now :)

As for the dynamic between the two... George embodies this wonderful dry wit that matches perfectly with Ringo’s more good-natured and gentle teasing. Their relationship is easy and fun, very very soft and warm. It’s really quite relaxed, considering both of them do lot of repetitive work that takes a lot of time, and they’re like that together as well, patient and calm.

Anonymous said: Have any of the 5tl kids been lost/ran away at any point and given John and Paul a fright?

I think, in grocery shop, at most. They’ve always been quite adept at keeping the kids under their watchful eye, and the kids haven’t had any urges to run away (because while Dave has teenage angst, he has no urges to like, y’know, leave the family he loves?). Of course even when you lose your kid into a grocery shop it’s a bit of a scare, at least for the Mother Hens Paul And John, (in the early years, not so much anymore since their skin is so tough), but everything’s always worked out fine in the end.

Anonymous said: I have a questionnn: has 5tl John had issues with his weight/ insecurity in the same way that actual John did? Idk I just love getting insights into this universe

I don’t think so, not to the same extent. Probably when he was a teenager he would’ve worried a little over his figure (like all teenagers do) but in this universe he’s always stayed in a relatively good shape, body mass wise (he still can’t lift heavy things but, hey. he’s a scrawny artist cut him some slack) and as such he doesn’t have any insecurities over it. I think, if he ever grows a little bit of belly when he’s older, it’ll be received with good humour and loving taps from Paul :) <3

Anonymous said: is paul always the big spoon in 5tl or do they switch? (WHY do i only think of these questions when im going to sleep jrbhrnsfjsj) 🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔🐔

Bless this question honestly aaahhhh <3333, Paul indeed is NOT always the big spoon, they switch, and BOTH love being the little spoon cos it makes them feels so nice. When they first started dating John might’ve taken the role of the big spoon a little more since Paul was still SMALL (bbbless,,,) but they evened it out. Sappy beings,, <33

Anonymous said: How did Martha join the 5TL family?

In the most traditional way possible: First kids wanted a dog, then Paul wanted a dog, and John grudgingly said “okay, I guess” and then suddenly there was fur everywhere and he had to go outside for long walks everyday no matter the weather and he had to keep a puppy from eating every possible furniture while Paul was at work. Poor John. (But he secretly loves Martha so it’s okay. He gets a little weak in the knees when Paul babbles to her.)

Anonymous said: How old were 5Thomas L. J+P when they started talking about kids/ did poor oleJohn hit the roof and freak out when Paul first suggested it since we know he’s not a fan of kids (except his own ofc)!

I think the discussion took place quite early in the relationship. Paul has always known he’d want kids, and as for John, and I quote the very first sentence of the whole fic,

“Having children had never been a requirement for John to live happily ever after. He would, however, be completely fine with one or two if his future partner wanted them, and he would love the kids with all his heart (if they weren’t absolutely terrible).“

So John has never hated the thought of kids, but for him the thought of them was more along the lines of “yeah I’ll be fine even if I never had them but if some where to come I wouldn’t object to it at all” so when Paul brought the subject up (like “hey how do you feel about kids? I mean ‘cos I kinda love them and I definitely wanna be a dad someday, but ofc not if it meant breaking up with you, ‘cos I’ll much more prefer a life with you ‘cos you’re like the only person I’ve ever loved and wanted to have sex with xoxo :) in fact let’s have sex right now”) John would’ve been like “yeah, cool, if it’s any possible any day i’m game even though i‘ll probably suck at being a dad because DADDY ISSUES” (the key to john’s character in any universe,,)

Remember that when John proposed Paul literally answered with “yeah i’ll marry you ONLY IF I GET TO BE THE POP”, so at that point Paul’s desires were very well known for John, and John knew what he was getting into. And as we know, John adores his kids :) So they’ve pretty much always had the agreement that one day there will be kids if it’s just possible. Only when it became the reality that they CAN adopt Dave, John started becoming nervous with the possibility of fucking up terribly, and even then he wanted to have a kid SO bad, as you can read from Chapter 12: the Bath Scene (which gives me the FEELS). That scene and chapter explain John’s stance on this pretty well! :)

Anonymous said: How tall are the 5tl kids? Just wondering <3 I love this fic

Hahah, thank you! Out of all the asks I’ve got over this fic, this is maybe one of the strangest ones - but it’s not a bad thing! Hahah I love how it got me thinking.

The average 15 year old boy in the UK would be around 5″7, but since Dave is originally from France he’s a little shorter, I’d say 5″4. Vera is 4″6, and Chuck is 3″8 :)

Anonymous said: I can imagine John getting absolutely TURNT around Rasputin by Boney M in the 5TL verse for some reason and it makes me laugh a lot

You are absolutely RIGHT this is the absolute TRUTH and it’s CANON NOW I SAID IT. John loves Boney M if only because they hit him right to where it itches. He loves singing along to Daddy Cool and Paul kinda hates it because Paul likes the Ramones and Nirvana and Rock’n Roll, baby, and then there’s John waving this disco propaganda at his head, but they work around it.

(Occasionally Paul might be caught humming Ma Baker) (Mma-mma-mma-mma-mmmaah)

Anonymous said: Do you have any more 5tl headcannons? The wait is killing me lol

Hahaha so many of them are actual spoilers but have a small list of ones that I can share with you! (Also... this whole post kinda is based on my headcanons so.... ) :D

Dave creates memes about his sucker family and sends them over in the family whatsapp group

(Credit @sunbeatle <3)

This also includes the Pepe. John loves the Pepe. He sends Paul Pepe memes all day long. Paul wants to know who this lizard is.

Chuck loves Pepe. He draws Paul a Pepe drawing. John puts it on the wall above their bed.

“John please stop. i'm not having sex in front of the lizard”

John blindfolds Paul so that Paul doesn't have to look at Pepe

“John I am going to divorce you over that lizard.”

Dave: "oh my god pop. it's a fucking frog." Paul: "wHAt part of that LIZARD looks like a FROG to you????"

Plot twist: Paul actually loves Pepe and knows it's a frog but he loves seeing how amused John gets over Paul's loathing; Anything For The Husband

(Pepe idea: Credit for Maria and Daisy. made us all howl with laughter)

John uses a ton emojis, always the wrong and the weird ones. He is VERY aware of it. Chaotic Evil.

Paul used to have the same kind of sunglasses as Kurt Cobain in the 90′s. He actually used them. They looked like this:

Terrible.

Paul sometimes writes poems, mostly humorous ones with a tongue-in-cheek about his life; it’s a nice creative outlet. He also might write poems specifically directed at the kids, so a children’s story but in poem form, and then he reads them to Chuck (or has John read them dramatically, which really fun for all of them)

There you go people! Hopefully this satisfied your bottomless thirst for more 5TL for some time! Don’t be afraid to hit me with new asks and your own headcanons, I love discussing this fic! Cheerio! <3

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hollenius · 6 years ago

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I'm so so sorry but I have to: Werner for the character meme (and/or Chuck McGill, if you can't think of anything!)

What the hell, I'm gonna do Werner AND Chuck

Werner

Fav thingabout him: He is so sweet; if I had a German uncle or grandpa or something, I'dwant him to be mine. He obviously takes his work very seriously too. He(initially) seems like a very cautious, careful sort of guy...unfortunatelythis attitude does not extend to all aspects of his life.

Least favthing: He's too sweet, dammit. His naivete and trusting nature made megenuinely angry, because I couldn't believe anyone could be so stupid aboutanything when he seemed fairly smart about everything else. I don't think youhave to be "street-smart" to understand that breaking out of an enclosedcompound without permission isn't the sort of thing you'd be allowed to getaway with. I was annoyed at how he felt like a plot device at the endthere--that he just existed to force Mike to have to kill him. It's a fault ofthe writing more than the character. Everyone could see the end coming from amile away, which is (as far as I can remember) unprecedented in the series.Even things that were heavily telegraphed and seemed obvious usually carriedsome sort of unforeseen twist, i.e. everyone thinking the lantern was going tobe involved in Chuck's death, but not knowing it was going to be a suicide. Thesecond they showed Mike building up a relationship with Werner, everyone knewexactly where it was headed. Also, this is a weird pet peeve, but I hate how healways called Mike "Michael". Bro, you've been working with him formonths, you are the only one who calls him that.

Fav line:(agh, unfortunately I can't recall any because I don't have any way ofrewatching season 4 at the moment. I love that he was courteous enough totranslate into English that he felt like he was going to throw up in the bumpyvan ride.)

brOTP: Him& Mike as cute old man drinking buddies.

OTP: Werner& his unseen wife, I guess. (That phone call before his death was so sad. I hope nothing happens to her, but this is the Breaking Bad Cinematic Universe, so bad things often happen to innocent people.)

nOTP: idk,Werner/Kai? I haven't really seen him shipped with anybody so I can't say Ihave any strong opinions on the matter.

randomheadcanon: (again, I need to rewatch all of season 4, because I remember thestory arcs, but not enough of the little details in dialogue and stuff.)

unpopularopinion: I have to admit, I don't know enough of what the popular opinions onWerner are to know what an unpopular opinion would be. I liked him, I just wishhis character arc felt less contrived and that he was treated like less of adevice. I also have seen some people in some places comparing him to Walt,which doesn't really make sense to me, because personality-wise they're justtoo far removed from each other. (Then again, people were even comparing dopeyPryce to Walter White, which was also a stretch!)

song Iassociate w/ him: I...I have no idea! Sorry. (So long, farewell, aufwiedersehen, goodbye?)

fav picture: the cute little drawings @callmcgills did of him! (Also, ugh, the shot where he is, uh, shot...is beautiful. Depressing, but cinematically beautiful. I’m not posting that here though.)

Chuck

Fav thingabout him: Honestly, as a fellow cowardly, anxiety-ridden, socially maladroit, perfectionistolder child, aspects of him are extremely relatable, frightening as that may beto admit. (My younger brother is of the slacker/moocher variety, rather thanthe con man variety, though.) I don't agree with everything he does, but I understandwhy he does it. (This is actually pretty similar to my attitude towardsSkyler's actions in Breaking Bad--I don't necessarily agree with her decisions,but I mostly understand why she acts the way she does.)

Least favthing: I think he should've been willing to at least put Jimmy on some sort ofprobationary path to HHM after he landed Sandpiper. HHM was under no obligationto hire Jimmy after he passed the bar (a lot of fandom seems to feel otherwise,which makes no sense! I don't think any other firm would've wanted to hireJimmy either!) Jimmy probably would've still managed to screw something up, butat least then if Chuck wanted to officially bar him from working for HHM forgood, Jimmy would know why, and what it was that he had done to cause that. Itdoes no good to punish someone if he doesn't even understand he's beingpunished, which is what the whole issue is in the first place with Chuck goingbehind Jimmy's back and using Howard as the perpetual bearer of bad news.

Fav line:"Because if there's one thing kids love, it's local printjournalism."

brOTP: lmao Chuck is bros with nobody except his space blanket, and his ol'sipping-scotch-and-chortling companion Howard, before that relationship gotdestroyed...

OTP: ...althoughI must also confess a SHAMEFUL desire to ship Chuck/Howard, because it's gotsuch a messed up power dynamic, because they've known each other for at least18 years, because Howard's clearly still so much in awe of Chuck (which Chuckprobably enjoys), and because neither of them seems to have any other friendsor close relationships. (Are we ever going to learn what's up with Howard'swedding ring? Even my mom thinks Howard is gay at this point! And what's upwith papa Hamlin? Did he die? Retire?) Canon-wise, I'm actually really curiousabout Chuck & Rebecca's relationship, because I have to wonder what it washe did that caused her to divorce him, but not bear any particular grudge oranimus towards him afterwards. He was clearly really upset about the divorce,but doesn't bear any ill-will towards her either. She doesn't appear to enteredinto any new relationship after the divorce either. It's all very mysterious.

nOTP: I can'ttell if this person was serious or not, but I swear I remember seeing someonepropose some theory that Kim had fucked Chuck at some point, and that's gonnaget a BIG NO from me.

randomheadcanon: oh god I've got like five hundred of them at this point. Themassive infodump that was Chuck's obituary in the season 4 premiere contributedto a lot of them, I think. I imagine Chuck's freshman year of college, at age14, was absolute hell for him. He was so proud to get accepted to an Ivy Leagueschool, but had been upset it wasn't a more prestigious one, like Harvard,Yale, or Princeton. (He had applied to them and had a few interviews, but unbeknownstto him, he had been heavily penalized in their byzantine admissions proceduresbecause, despite his sterling academic record, they didn’t find him outgoing or athleticenough.) His parents put him on the train to Philadelphia by himself, with afew suitcases, a map, and $50. He had no problems getting to the university,but was pretty overwhelmed right off the bat by the fact that everyone else wasolder and wealthier than him; he had dealt with this to some extent in high school, butnot to this degree (I headcanon his fictional alma mater, Francis Xavier HighSchool, as a typical Jesuit all-boys preparatory school that draws heavily fromupper-middle-class suburban families). Here he was, a literal child, thrustinto the adult world, and the world of the elites, at that. He probably feltself-conscious about things he hadn't even realized he could feelself-conscious about before, and spent at least a couple nights sobbing intohis pillow, and praying that his roommate couldn't hear him. He made a coupledesperate attempts to fit in, with a relatively low level of success (e.g. goingto a party and trying to impress people there by playing piano, only to get abeer spilled on him instead), before deciding it wasn't worth it and he wouldthrow himself singlemindedly into his classes and extracurriculars. He had hisfirst-ever panic attack sometime during his first semester, and wound up at thecampus doctor's office because he had convinced himself he was having a heart attack.On being told he was physically fine, he was indignant, but all the same, henever told his family about the incident, or anyone else either. Somewherearound this time, he also gets a letter from his parents, telling him he'sgoing to be a big brother in a few months, and won't this be exciting for him?(He wants to tell them his life is too exciting for him as it is, but saysnothing, instead writing back that he is sure having a younger sibling to helplook after will be the greatest experience of his life. He almost convinceshimself that he means it.)

unpopularopinion: I DON'T HATE CHUCK. (The most unpopular opinion of all!) He's myfavorite character on the show, with the obvious disclaimer that saying acharacter is my favorite doesn't mean I approve of all the character's actions,etc. Also, I know he's just a fictional character, but I'm still pissed offabout people celebrating that he killed himself & saying they hope it waspainful & stuff like that. Like, how much of an asshole do you have to be?What a horrible thing to say.

song Iassociate w/ him: Burning Down The House j/k, probably Faure's Sicilienne,because I too, cannot play it on piano without screwing up

fav picture: Not a picture, but I can’t resist.

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filzmonster · 6 years ago

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song-of-amethyst replied to your post

“Top 5 Ships of my heart Rules: list 5 of your OTPs and tag 5 people. I...”

GilBreak is no crackship, they're totally valid! :D Do you see a lot of people say they are the other's left eye? <3 (also, I don't like to admit how much I relate to the tragic ships thing but here we are) On a more personal notes though I'm very interested in the PH crackships :p *has quite a lot of these too*

Oh look, I’m procrastinating again

nladsfhalksfhasdf I feel so validated right now ?? :’) Honestly I feel like there are not that much people in the fandom that actively ship them and I’m just here ?? starving for content ?? xD

(I mean. looking at the fandoms we’re in there’s not much of a choice we have but to let our hearts be broken by the same couple of idiots over and over again. It’s heaven for masochists.)

Oh boy. I show you mine if you show me yours I’ll put it under a read more since I can already see myself escalating with this. Also most of the crack ships basically boil down to Gilbert x Anyone Else b/c that’s just the kind of trash I am ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Gilbert x Reim

I fully blame that one special manga scene for this ship. The one in which they are having a tea party and Sharon tells Break that Gilbert learned how to cook because of him and then Gilbert spends two pages gushing about hOW AWESOME REIM IS and that just kinda did it for me (together with all the other little scenes these two get throughout the manga). Because when you think about it, they are very close age-wise, they probably spend a lot of time together and they both bond over what an asshole Break can be. THERE’S POTENTIAL THERE OKAY. Also they would have a very healthy, supportive relationship and it would just be the purest thing ever ?? So yeah. totally shipping them.

Gilbert x Lottie

I FULLY BLAME THE OTHER SPECIAL MANGA SCENE FOR THIS OKAY. The one in Last Dance ?? Where Lottie and Gilbert are bugging Reim b/c they found out he proposed to Sharon. IDK it just hit me how nice their dynamic seemed over those short couple of pages ?? Also I feel like they would really understand each other - they both have Master issues, they are both Baskervilles, they both lost people they cared about, they both had to do horrible things, they both got betrayed by Jack, they both had a special connection with Oswald/Glen, they are both kinda mother hens let’s be real. But they still did very different things with their common ground. Gilbert chose to sort of abandon Oswald/Glen because he couldn’t accept his decisions, while Lottie chose to stop him but still stayed by his side instead. They could talk about these things and it would be such an interesting conversation!! Aaaand someone in the fandom once said that since Lottie likes to cook too, she could help Gilbert learn how to cook with only one hand and just !! imagine !! the cuteness !!

Okay this is the part where it gets really crack-y okay pls don’t judge too hard

Leo x Gilbert

HEAR ME OUT. Bonding over Elliot’s death ?? Bonding over Oswald ?? Bonding over that whole Glen Baskerville thing in general ?? Bonding over Vincent being a self-sacrificing idiot ?? Bonding over Oz & Oz’ death ?? Just. Them being there for each other in ways no one else could be there for them. They are both servants. They are both kind of Glen B. (even though Gilbert isn’t anymore but like. he was supposed to be, he grew up being prepared to take over that role, something must have stuck) They both lost the same people. It probably wouldn’t be like. a very good (as in healthy and based on trust, true love) relationship, but it would be an interesting, darker one. It also probably wouldn’t last but that’s not the point of shipping anyway is it ??

Gilbert x The other Nightray siblings

Okay. This one is. Going to take a while to explain. I once read a pretty dark Gilbert x Vanessa fanfiction and that was when it just ?? occured to me that while we don’t get to see much of the other Nightray siblings (RIP I guess) except for Elliot (with whom I do not ship Gilbert with because they actually have a brother-brother bond in my eyes tbh) they still have potential to have interesting dynamics with Gilbert (and Vincent, too, so I guess I ship Vincent with them, too). Especially when you look at it from a ‘we are using each other for things’ point of view. Like them using Gilbert to try and get to Raven’s power or just using him for the Nightray’s dirty work in general. Gilbert using them for information he could pass on to Break. The Nightrays are already a pretty dysfunctional bunch so why not add that kind of dysfunctional relationship/dynamic, too ??

Gilbert x Sharon

I don’t have an excuse for this, they are just both really nice & caring characters and they would deserve each other okay. With that said:

Vincent x Sharon

If I remember correctly, Jun once stated that an arranged marriage between Vincent and Sharon was supposed to be a plot point in the manga so ?? I could see it work in a ‘we are both highly political and totally maybe not on the same side so we’ll just really use each other for our own gain and whups what do you mean we could also team up and be badass together ??’ way. Break would probably kill Vincent first though so

Break x Rufus Barma

I once got a fanfiction promopt for them so. I blame the person who prompted me. I can’t un-see it, you know ?? B/c once I started to think about their potential dynamic in order to write the fanfic, tHE DYNAMIC WAS JUST THERE OKAY. IT WAS JUST THERE. and it would work ?? I mean. The relationship between these two would probably be based on them constantly trading secrets and informations with each other and trying to out-plot the other one, but they could still be a pretty good couple. Much like Vincent x Sharon: they would just team up and screw over everybode else together.

Oswald/Glen x that Nightray dude that warned him about Jack

b/c why not ?? We know next to nothing about that guy so why not make him someone who cared about Oswald and tried to give him some love because Oswald dESERVES IT OKAY.

Jack x Arthur Barma

Again: why not ? Arthur totally had a crush on him and it would make Jack betraying him so much more brutal and cold hearted (or Jack was actually also in love with him but his obsession with Lacie was still stronger).

Jack x Miranda Barma

¯\_(ツ)_/¯ (honestly if I wouldn’t read Jack as kinda grey-ace / not interested in other people besides Oswald and Lacie, these two could just have some kind of. friends with benefits relationship without the being actual friends part.)

Ada x Vanessa

It would be like Romeo and Juliet but gay They could either be using each other to get information, or they could be actually in love and just. be tragically seperated by their family feud.

Lottie x Sharon

The female power couple I deserve. They are both Queens. They both care a lot about the people important to them. They are both willing to make sacrifices and they are both very smart on an emotional level. Also they could totally bond about the dumb men in their lives.

Oz x Break

... I don’t even know why myself. They are just very similar to each other and it would be like one bunny bumping heads with another bunny.

Reim x Lottie

J U S T. do it for the aesthetic, if not for anything else ?? They are both really smart and - out of their respective groups - the ones who look like they have their life together the most but actually don’t

Elliot x Alice

No idea where that one is coming from tbh, they just seem like they would kinda. click. with each other. also imagine the look on Oz’ and Gilbert’s faces

Alice x Gilbert

In a world where the Tragedy Of Sablier never happened, these two grow up together and have a very ‘slow burn childhood friends to lovers’ trope going on. f i g h t m e one day Gilbert is sad so Alice gives him a very cute stuffed rabbit (“this one always protects me when I’m sad I can lend him to you”) and from then on they just share the stuffed rabbit with each other as their protector

I ... I think that’s it. I’m not even sure if you read until here tbh xD Like I said, please try not to judge too hard, a lot of these are very lowkey ships. aLSO FEEL FREE TO TELL ME YOURS PLEASE I AM CURIOUS TOO !!

#song-of-amethyst #songofamethyst #replies #w o w this escalated like. A LOT.#I'm sorry.#in other news i successfully procrastinated until the point where i don't have time to do the thing i procrastinated anymore so.#a win?#i don't think so but whatever.#I'M SORRY I AM TALKING SO MUCH ANLSDKHFASDF #<3

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thenightling · 6 years ago

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NOPE BOOK TAG!

Tag creator (A BookTube Book) - https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQt_…

1. NOPE Ending: A book ending that made you go NOPE either in denial, rage or simply because the ending was crappy.

This is a tough one. I rarely hate how literature ends. I’ll name a few comics and then move on the literature.

Novels: The Man who fell to Earth by Walter Tevis (Love this novel but hate the ending.) The Dresden Files: Changes The Frankenstein Papers by Fred Saberhagen (He writes Dracula so well but his Frankenstein Monster... Spoilers, he’s a f--king alien with amnesia. That’s the twist. He just THOUGHT he was created by Victor Frankenstein. It’s so... Stupid. The Last vampire by Whitley Strieber. Lilith’s Dream by Whitley Strieber On my Honor

Lolita. WHY is this a classic?!?

______________________________

Comics: The Sandman: The Kindly Ones. I know it’s a classic but out of all of the original Sandman this is the one I liked the least, loved the rest. The Dreaming (1990s to early 2000s version). It’s just... awful. Madman & Monster (written by Steve Niles and published by IDW). I hate the ending but like the premise.

Nineteen eighty-four by George Orwell. Great novel, just very depressing.

Manga:

Return to Labyrinth. The author (Jake T. Forbes) just wanted his cake and eat it too. He establishes that Jareth is Sarah’s true love but at the same time decides that they can’t be together “For reasons” and has Toby give a “I learned something today” speech that lasts several pages to justify it. No, if it’s true love, they’re supposed to be together. Don’t try to placate both the shippers and the fans who want them to not be a couple, you won’t appease anyone if you try to appease both.

Wolf’s Rain: It’s just so sad. Why!??

_______________________

2. NOPE Protagonist: The main character you dislike and drives you crazy.

Novels: Miriam from The Hunger, The Last Vampire, and Lilith’s Dream by Whitley Strieber.

The Vampire Armand from Anne Rice’s The Vampire Chronicles. He’s too much of a Sadist. I don’t understand the appeal. Lolita. WHY is this a classic?!

Comics:

Echo from The Dreaming (Late 90s / early 2000s version)

Riri Williams, the current writing of the Captain Marvel comics, actually pretty much all of Marvel at the moment... _______________________________________________

3. NOPE Series: A series that turned out to be one huge pile of NOPE after you’ve invested all of that time and energy on it, or a series you gave up on because it wasn’t worth it anymore.

Novels:

The Hunger book series by Whitley Strieber

Anne Rice’s The Vampire Chronicles, most everything after Tale of The Body Thief and Tale of the Body Thief wasn’t that good... The Dresden Files. I don’t know, my interest just kind of waned and also I came across a few unpleasant fans who legitimately believe women and men “talk differently” and “use different language” when speaking and told me a woman can’t write male characters and visa versa. Mary Shelley begs to differ! Comics: The current Sandman Universe comics...

Morbius: The Living Vampire (1990s run)

Manga:

_________________________________

4. NOPE Popular pairing: A ship you don’t support.

I don’t really hate many pairings...

Oh, wait. Lolita. Do I really need to explain? Comics: Joker and Harley Quinn (original versions as created for Batman The Animated series.) Cain and Abel and their sister-wives in The Dreaming (late 90s to early 2000s comics). That was just... Oh, my God. Was that just to be edgy!? For God’s sake, Abel’s fraternal twin sister was Cain’s wife and locked in attic!? WTF?!? Lucien and Nuala (also in The Dreaming late 90s and early 2000s version). Essentially “Hey, the people we’re in love with are dead. Why don’t we hook up?” “Okay! You’re good enough. Let’s settle on each other.”

Does Caitlin R. Kiernan have any concept of love, at all? Steve and Bucky. Not because it’s a bad ship or because it’s gay but because the fans who support it are so rabid and if you suggest it’s not canon they immediately assume you’re a homophobe and send you hate.

SwanQueen (Emma Swan and The Evil Queen in Once Upon a Time) similar reasons as above. ____________________________

5. NOPE. Plot twist: A plot twist you didn’t see coming or didn’t like.

The Frankenstein Papers by Fred Saberhagen.

(He writes Dracula so well but his Frankenstein Monster... Spoilers, he’s a f--king alien with amnesia. That’s the twist. He just THOUGHT he was created by Victor Frankenstein. It’s so... Stupid. _______________________________

6. NOPE. Protagonist action/decision: A character decision that made you shake your head NOPE.

Faust and his hornness for FOURTEEN-YEAR-OLD Gretchen and almost everything he did because of that horniness.

7. NOPE. Genre: A genre you will never read.

I don’t think there’s a genre I’d never read. But I’m not a big fan of young adult romances or bodice rippers and torture porn. I’m not into errotica or graphic violence even though I adore Gothic Horror.

8. Nope format:

Umm.... I prefer hardcover to paperback but I don’t avoid any particular format. I do hate when the new Barnes and Nobel classics call things like Edgar Allan Poe and H. P. Lovecraft, Mary Shelley, and Bram Stoker “Gothic fantasy” written across the cover. It perpetuates the idea that horror is lowbrow and it angers me that we refuse to consider good quality horror to be horror anymore.

Anne Rice’s Prince Lestat (when I read it with wet hands and the dust jacket off) the color on the cover started to turn my fingers dark blue. I never want that to happen again.

9. NOPE. Trope: A trope that makes you go NOPE.

Long lost child that the protagonist didn’t know they had because the mother (or in rare cases someone else) thought it would be best the child never know they are related to the protagonist because their life is too dangerous / cursed / ect... I hate when parental rights are stomped on for plot, and especially when “it’s okay because it’s the mother who did it and the mother just wants whats best for the child.”

10. NOPE. Recommendation: A book recommendation that is constantly hyped and pushed at you that you simply refuse to read.

I’ve never refused to read a recommendation but I have later thought “Why did you think I’d like this?!”

Twilight “Because you love vampires.” Oh, and Frankenstein’s Monster: A Novel by Susan Heyboer O’keefe. Just because he looks like the version from the Shelley novel doesn’t mean he acted like it. That as awful.

______________________________

11. NOPE. Cliche/pet peeve: A cliche or writing pet peeve that always makes you roll your eyes.

Wasn’t this already number 9? I thought we covered this with tropes. Many tropes are cliches. Oh, well...

Oh, and “He’s blue collar so we’re going to use him as the serrogate racist / bigot now even though he wasn’t before.” (Cough) Merv Pumpkinhead in the new version of The Dreaming. (Cough.)

12. NOPE. Love interest:

I thought we established this with the ship conversation?

I don’t feel like re-writing it, just re-read that one. Same answers apply. I guess I can add The Corinthian from Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman. You know if it ever gets a film or TV series adaptation someone somewhere will find him attractive and start making errotic art and fan fiction about him...

13. NOPE. Book: A book that shouldn’t have existed that made you say NOPE.

The Dreaming Late 90s early 2000s version. I don’t really like saying any book shouldn’t exist. But there are some that are really awful sequels or insults to an established lore because of how subpar they are. ___________________________________

14. NOPE. Villain: A scary villain/antagonist you would hate to cross and would make you run in the opposite direction.

The Corinthian from Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman and pretty much any antagonist created by George R. R. Martin.

15. NOPE. Death: A character death that still haunts you.

Morpheus in Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman.

And even Abel’s death even though he comes back later.

___________________________

16. NOPE. Author: An author you had a bad experience reading and have decided to quit.

Anne Rice. She doesn’t even remotely write the way she used to . It feels vapid now. And i have trouble reconciling myself that the angry bird aliens from Brevena and the Replimoids exist in the same universe as Interview with the Vampire.

Also she’s been very cruel and unprofessional in her behavior to those who have criticized her work and “I didn’t know I was sicking people on anyone” shared negative reviews with direct links to pages on her Facebook over the years. it got nasty. She even dug up one of my old reviews for Blood Canticle that I wrote FIFTEEN years ago!

And to a lesser extent, J. K. Rowling. Her views of Americans and especially “Nomaj” (linguistically) just makes me cringe internally. Americans are the more old fashioned with language, not hipster (i.e Elevator vs. Lift, Cellular phone vs. Mobile). Not to mention cloistered religious-style orders (like Catholicism) use the same terms from country to country. This is also true with Wicca. Linguistically the American terms in Fantastic Beasts do NOT make sense.

@sorry-for-the-chocolate @thesaramonster @zal001 @missghostlymoonshadow @kaimaciel @endlessemptynight @deathlyendless @vagaryhexxx @thegreatvampirekiller @unnecessaryhorns @sweatyeddieandaliengoo

#Nope book #Nope book tag

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acsversace-news · 7 years ago

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June 1995, Milan. Gianni Versace "casually" informs Donatella that he's "arranged an interview" with The Advocate. When she doesn't react, he mumbles, "For gay readers." "To say what?", she asks challengingly. "That the built-ins on this season of ACS are as envy-making as your stereotypically Versace pink butterfly blazer is hideous," Gianni does not say, although he could,

because these floor-to-ceiling jobs make me want to book a ticket to Italy like now. Mystifyingly, there is no sideways-rolling ladder with which to reach tomes on the higher shelves, but of course this isn't the point of the scene; the point is that Gianni has never said in so many words that he's gay, and that Donatella doesn't think he should do so "to print, to publish." Antonio D'Amico smirks as Donatella picks up her cigarettes and crisply points out that she handles publicity for the company. Gianni shrugs disingenuously that it's not about her, but Donatella isn't going for it: it's about more than him. She's annoyed that he didn't consult her, and now he's annoyed, clanking down his espresso cup and snarking, "What would you advise?" Yes, Antonio echoes, "What would you advise?" Donatella side-eyes him and theorizes aloud that it's Antonio's idea, that he wants to "be famous" as "Versace's lover." For 13 years everyone's mistaken him for Gianni's assistant, he grumbles, and Donatella snorts that apparently his pride is more important than the company. The sniping continues, Antonio saying he's not trying to become a public figure: "I know my place. Unlike you." Donatella cocks her head and asks at four degrees Kelvin, "And what is my place," at which time Gianni bangs a chair and snaps, "Enough!" No more fighting over this: it was his idea.

He asks Donatella to walk with him, and she stalks after him with that weird colicky gait women get who wear too-high heels every day. He wants her support, but she notes that his company supports all the people working around them -- and they have stores opening in countries where homosexuality is illegal. What if he's denied a visa? What if the stores can't open? Gianni is momentarily taken aback, and asks what she really thinks could happen. She says the rock stars, the actors, "the royalty whose endorsements we cherish" might not want to associate with the brand. Gianni shrugs, "Unless we keep Elton," but Donatella doesn't see the humor; he lives "in isolation," and has forgotten what the real world is like. He tries to argue that the women they design for are "fearless," and when Donatella says it's not the same, he asks, "Is the brand Versace braver than the man?" She doesn't have an answer for that, but when he stalks to the other side of the atelier, she follows, asking if he's angry at her, or the world. She goes on to wonder what his "admission" will cost when they take the company public. Gianni says, not terribly forcefully, that she's exaggerating, but she reminds him of Perry Ellis's final show, Ellis dying of AIDS, too weak to walk on his own. "His most important show" in many ways, Gianni murmurs, and certainly it is as far as its value as a reference in this season of ACS -- Ellis, who died in 1986, remained in resolute denial about his illness and that of his longtime lover, whom he had seen into the ground earlier that year; at that point in the life of both the epidemic and the culture, that approach was probably the default, at least for public consumption -- but Donatella's point is that, after that, people stopped buying Ellis's clothes. "Some people," Gianni says. Many people, Donatella retorts. Some, Gianni insists, and walks away from her again.

Why now, she wants to know. "Because I was sick. And I didn't die," Gianni says. It's a miracle. He has a second chance now. Why is he alive -- to be afraid? No. He's here, and he "must use it."

After the title card, we return to 1997 -- four days before Jeffrey Trail's murder. In a crappish motel in San Diego, Andrew Cunanan is seated in grimy underpants on a nubby chair surrounded by trash bags, prepping a needle full of drugs and grandly reassuring an American Express account representative that he just needs enough money to get to Minneapolis.

He's going to visit his "two best friends," one of whom owes him more than ten grand; then he can go back to being the best customer ever. As the Amex rep skeptically repeats that he's asking them to extend his credit so that he can…repair his credit, the camera lingers pointedly on an expensive watch on the floor. Cunanan distractedly taps the needle to rid it of bubbles as the rep verbally eye-rolls that she has to consult her supervisor. Cunanan chirps that he'll hold, and injects himself between his toes. I assume this is included to show both his alleged drug involvement and his much-ballyhooed ability to charm all and sundry, but I ran into some American Express credit trouble in college and was on the line with their reps almost daily, assuring them that my latest low-double-digit payment from my pizza-delivery job was winging its way towards them and please don't make me declare bankruptcy as a 20-year-old. Like, if I convinced them to let me chip down my balance 13 bucks at a time? I'm...not that charming. This is eminently doable by civilians.

Cunanan gets up, surveys his closet, and starts taking down armfuls of suits and shirts, still on their hangers. Do people actually do this? It seems like an only-onscreen thing. In any case, the removal of the last armload of blazers reveals a mini-crazy wall consisting of the very Advocate article the Versaces were arguing about before.

That pic at the top left, that looks like IRL Cunanan, should maybe have been cut, no?

In a warehouse, Jeff Trail is hoisting heavy canisters onto shelves. Later, he's not laughing alone without salad at a picnic table above the work floor when a co-worker joins him. Jeff notices the guy's tattoo as an armed-forces design; the guy notices him noticing and asks if he served. He did, in the navy, and kind of overshares about the USS Gridley and how he's sort of sad she got decommissioned. So he misses it? Every day. Why'd he leave? "I dunno," Jeff grits, and admits he regrets it, but when the guy begins to say he was never going to become an officer, it gets awk in a hurry with Jeff interrupting that he was an officer, and adding that his brother and sister are both in the armed forces. "You married?", the guy asks, probably concluding that it was Jeff's spouse who wanted him to leave the service, then. Jeff parries that, but the guy asks again why he left, especially to work "in a place like this." This place is okay, Jeff glares, but the guy's like, but for an Annapolis grad?

Jeff, icily: "I made the decision." The guy tries to smooth it over by saying his wife always tells him he asks too many questions, but Jeff just repeats over him, "I made the decision -- okay?" The guy apologizes for offending him and offers to "leave it there," but Jeff can't, leaping to his feet and shouting again that he made the decision, loud enough for other co-workers to look up from their lunches.

After lunch, Jeff is loading canisters, zoned out, when he's told "an Andrew called" -- he says he'll see Jeff at the airport.

That's where we see him next, as he greets David Madson with a fond arm-squeeze. David didn't think Jeff would come. Neither did Jeff, Jeff says disgustedly. David doesn't get why Cunanan's coming there, but Jeff's like, he has nothing and no one and everything he's told you is a lie. David gets that, right? David: "Do you even like him?"

Jeff sighs that Cunanan was "there for" him once, and he owes Cunanan, but it's not the same. David feels "kinda sorry" for him. "Don't." He's lonely. "For a reason," Jeff says, adding that after this "for old times' sake" weekend, he's done with Cunanan. David's like, he's here for three nights, ugh, and Jeff says Cunanan can have his apartment, Jeff will stay with his sister, and not to victim-blame here, but if you don't want to deal with Cunanan because he's a grifter, you put him up in a hotel, not at your house when you can't keep an eye on him and/or your belongings. Cut to Cunanan emerging from the crowd with a step almost Michigan J. Frog in its peppiness as Jeff asks David not to tell Cunanan where he is: "He's so crazy, he might just show up."

Asterisking this point is Cunanan's desperately cheerful sing-songing of "The three amigooooos!" and overly handsy hug of David. He hugs Jeff next, choosing to ignore Jeff's stiff reaction, and burbles about how much fun they'll have this weekend: "It'll be just like old times." Jeff's all, nah, and says he can't hang out with them. Cunanan asks why not. "Aside from everything you've done?" David looks down as Cunanan feigns ignorance.

Jeff says he's away 'til Sunday at a sales conference, but he'll be sure to send Cunanan a postcard. Cunanan lamely asks if Jeff's "still annoyed" about the postcard he "accidentally" sent to Jeff's dad signed "Drew, kiss kiss." "I made a mistake!" David rolls not just his eyes but his entire head as Jeff brings out his keys, saying Cunanan can stay there tomorrow night. Cunanan doesn't get why he's not staying with David; David says without much conviction that he's busy "seeing a friend." "Wh-who, what friend?" Cunanan presses, but despite this inability or unwillingness to take a hint re: David wanting to get it in with, y'know, not him -- or, more to the point, David's obvious trepidation at drawing that line brightly, or at all -- Jeff still hands Cunanan his keys, then walks off without another word. Again, I don't mean to cast aspersions on Jeff Trail; nothing he did either doomed him or could have saved him, or any of the others. I've found myself in similar situations, feeling like it's easier to just go along this one last time and then get down to the ghosting once s/he's left town -- especially when s/he's presenting as a dishonest but not noticeably dangerous asshole. I have the benefit of a hindsight of which Jeff was deprived by Cunanan, as well. That's the frustration: that it can't be undone, couldn't have been undone. Or that maybe it could have gone differently -- if Cunanan weren't so easily able to leverage the doors of the closet against his targets.

Sometimes they swing back and hit him, though, as we're about to see when he and David return to David's loft. David snuggles with Prints for a minute, and Cunanan takes the opportunity to fish that expensive watch out of the top of his duffel and make a big show of having "gotten" (read: stolen, we'll no doubt see in a future ep) David something. "Open it!" he says with an antsy body twitch that is almost endearing, except that he's horrid. David seems to know that it contains an emotional bomb as well as whatever's literally inside, and is initially speechless at the sight of the watch. Cunanan has assumed that awkward stiff-armed stance again

as David struggles for words. I'll note here Orth's Vanity Fair piece's assertion that, "though Madson was at least two boyfriends away from Cunanan by the end of April, he continued to accept gifts from" Cunanan. I still haven't read Orth's book, and perhaps she's more nuanced therein, but I'm finding implied judgment in that locution, to the effect that David "shouldn't" have taken gifts from a man he wasn't involved with, because it sent mixed signals -- or meant that David wasn't a quote-unquote perfect victim, the saint the newsmagazines are always looking for. Well, it probably did send mixed signals, and David probably wasn't perfect, because none of us is -- but here again we see Cunanan's victims a) not knowing what we know, because it's not what anyone tends to assume, and/or b) accepting overly generous gestures from Cunanan because it's less uncomfortable than rejecting him or questioning the gifts' provenance. The scene we're watching/cringing at here perfectly illuminates not only why Cunanan's victims might have had over-the-top "presents" from the killer among their possessions, but why Cunanan for the most part continued to skate on outrageous behavior.

Behavior like…refusing to read the room, because when David snaps the watch box closed and pulls a nauseated face, then goes to refill Prints's water bowl, Cunanan bustles over, picks up the box, and goes into cheesy-proposal mode. David's response is a glorious "ehh-whennnnhhhh?!" look from Cody Fern

at which Cunanan has the presence of mind to stammer that he doesn't have to answer right now, he can think about it "for the next few days." David's like, it's against the law, so. Cunanan shrugs: "Who cares about that?" "Everyone," David exasps. "Well, I…don't!" Cunanan says, and Darren Criss throws in a tiny shoulder shimmy here that is so eloquent vis-à-vis Cunanan thinking this damn-the-homophobia-torpedeos declaration will win him his case. David's like, again: no, "it's insane," and Fern's unwittingly Australian inflection of "in-sein" is rather winning. Cunanan is hell-bent on ordering a sweet roll, however, and babbles that they can call it a commitment ceremony, then. David tries to explain that "it's not -- the term" as Cunanan Manson-lampses at him and blares, "Then what is it." "The idea of you and me," David finally is able to say. His expression unchanging, Cunanan pauses, then tells David to keep thinking about it over the weekend, and then "if for whatever reason it's a no," he can keep the watch as a thanks. ..."Whatever reason," indeed. Thanks for what, David asks, exhausted. For turning Cunanan's life around, Cunanan duhs, then shares that he got a new job, a claim David doesn't believe; as Cunanan keeps lying about his new condo in San Francisco, David wearily closes his eyes and nods to himself. "I'm a whole new person!" Cunanan desperates, fastening the watch onto David's wrist. "And all I need -- is someone to be a new person for."

At his sister Laura's gorgeously porched house, Jeff surveys the family pictures (including one of Laura in uniform) in the hall, then takes the linens he'll be sleeping on from his pregnant sister; he doesn't want to be any trouble. "It's no trouble, I love that you're here. Why are you here?" his sister asks, easing herself onto a sofa. Jeff admits he's avoiding Cunanan. She snarks on Cunanan's postcard "mistake" trying to out Jeff to their dad. Jeff says grimly that he's not going to hang out with Cunanan, but Laura has Cunanan's number and Jeff's, telling Jeff he shouldn't let Cunanan have "that kind of control" over him and that Cunanan "was threatening" Jeff with the postcard. Why doesn't Jeff just tell their parents he's gay himself? Jeff knows what they're going to think. "They love you," Laura snorts, which, no doubt, but also: easy for the het sibling who's furnished grandchildren to say, even if she's correct. Jeff changes tacks, saying it's not the right time: they're so happy about the baby. It's her baby, Laura says, so as his superior officer she's ordering him to do it. "I'll think about it," Jeff says. "You've thought about it enough," Laura grumbles. Again: yeah, probably, and she's not a bad guy here, but…you know. Your loved ones' coming out is not about you. Jeff rolls his eyes, then tells Laura's belly, "I'm looking forward to being an uncle, so. Much." He smooches the belly -- aw -- and rests his head on it, listening…

…which makes the overlapping cut to the polka palace in the next scene pretty hilare and cuts the sadness nicely. Too bad we're about to be marinating in uncomf. David and Cunanan climb the stairs into the joint, Cunanan babbling that it's such an original idea, and it feels "special -- memorable." David quashes that line of thinking ASAP, saying it wasn't his choice -- his friend picked it. Said friend is his co-worker Melinda, who appears out of the crowd to greet David, and he introduces Cunanan as his "friend, Andrew." "'Friend,'" Cunanan repeats with a full "this guy, amirite" head-and-shoulders eye-roll, and says he's more than a friend. Everyone's "…k" faces do not deter him from grabbing David's wrist, still with the watch on it, and raising it to eye level to brag that he got it for David "to show how much he means to me." He adds quote casually, "It's worth ten thousand dollars." Melinda says, "Wow," and shoots David a quick, merry "by which I mean 'wow, you're gauche'" look. The silence in which nobody knows how to respond to Cunanan goes on for quite some time…

…and then we mercifully cut to David and Melinda polka-ing amateurishly and laughing a lot. Then it's into slo-mo, and the distorting of the soundtrack, as Cunanan tries to arrange his face into a "isn't this a hoot" shape but ends up Starmanning, as usual.

Later, David orders more beer and speculatively watches Cunanan from the bar as Melinda heroically tries to make conversation: "So what do you do?" Almost daring her to call him on it, Cunanan lies that he makes movie sets; he's working on Titanic down in Mexico. "And you're here for David?" "There's no one I love more," Cunanan confides, which at least is in the same area code as true. David returns with three steins, and Melinda fills him in, giving gorgeous "pfft" tone to "We were just talking about movie sets in Mexico!" "Mexico?" David says, glaring at Cunanan, who thinks for a second before grabbing David's hands: "Let's go dance!" Melinda watches them carefully as David gets free of Cunanan's grasp and says he doesn't need the whole weekend to think about it. "I can't hear you, the music's too loud!" Cunanan says through a desperately fake chuckle. David tries to repeat himself, but Cunanan's sticking with the can't-hear-you bit, bobbing frantically and shouting, "Let's just dance!" They can't get married, David says. "Even if we could -- we can't." The smile drains off Cunanan's face as David says he's really sorry, he doesn't know what else to say. He leaves Cunanan standing on the dance floor, other couples whirling around him. Oof.

At the loft the next morning, Cunanan is sitting, staring into space, still wearing the same clothes from the previous night. David comes out in a tee and boxers and asks if he couldn't sleep. "No." David half-rolls his eyes and goes into the bedroom to fish the watch out of his top drawer; the camera pans up to find Cunanan in the doorway, having Nosferatu'd his way into frame once again. David startles, then murmurs that "there's something great" about Cunanan; he's always thought that. He's generous. But it's not right to keep the watch, he says, handing the box to Cunanan. "I know money is tight." Cunanan badly lies that it isn't. David says it's okay to ask for help instead of telling "all these crazy stories," but Cunanan isn't going to admit to anything, asking through another super-fake chuckle, "What crazy stories?" David girds his loins and runs down the list: he's not making movie sets, he doesn't have a condo in San Fran…he's unhappy. He should let David help him the way Cunanan has helped other people. Cunanan looks genuinely baffled and fearful at this idea as David clarifies that he doesn't mean by marrying Cunanan -- that's not possible, it's not real. It's not what, Cunanan prompts, giving him the Manson lamps. "Another crazy story," David says reluctantly, and holds the box out for Cunanan to take.

Cut to both men heading for the elevator. As the door is closing on Cunanan, David stops it with his arm and guiltily says he can cancel on his "friend" for that night, if Cunanan needs to talk, "about anything." Cunanan tries for cheery, but ends up sounding robotic as he says again that he's starting a new life in San Francisco. "I need someone to share it with." David pulls a "yeah, still a hard pass" face and says he'll see Cunanan Sunday. Now it's Cunanan's turn to stop the door with his arm, and his face has darkened to one of Dawsonian accusation: "Is it Jeff? That friend you're seeing?" David waits a beat too long before denying it. Andrew releases the door silently. David turns away from the elevator all "Fuuuuuu."

It isn't Jeff, but whoever it is, he's cozy with David That Way when they return to David's building -- as Cunanan can see from his creeper stakeout spot across the street. When the other two head inside, he marches robotically across the street for a closer view.

From there, he heads to Jeff's apartment. It takes him a second to get the lights working, but alas, almost no time after that to come across the photo of Jeff and David, Prints nestled between them, tucked into the frame of another photo on Jeff's bureau.

The picture looks merely friendly, to my eye, but Cunanan is already paranoid about the possibility of a…"Tradson," I guess, and starts rifling through Jeff's drawers. It's not totally clear what he's looking for -- proof of a relationship; blackmail fodder a la what he unearthed at David's in the previous episode -- but when he pulls out Jeff's Navy uniform box from the closet, it seems like it's maybe both. Disrespectfully donning Jeff's hat, he digs under the dress whites and finds an unmarked VHS cassette. It's a news broadcast, interviewing active-duty servicemen about gays in the military, and the interviewee onscreen drops a few f-bombs as Cunanan keeps going through Jeff's stuff, eventually finding the gun. He's quite expertly loading a clip into the gun when he hears Jeff's voice coming from the TV; it's Jeff, in an identity-masking shadow, telling an interviewer that any gays in the military must serve in the closet. Cunanan kneels in front of the set and strokes Jeff's darkened face as Jeff says his career is probably over anyway, because he saved a gay fellow sailor from getting beaten to death by his peers, which tipped off said peers that Jeff too is gay. Cunanan sights the gun at the TV. Jeff, near tears, confesses that he's dreamt of taking that "good thing" he did back, letting the other guy die, so that the others wouldn't "suspect" him. (This interview did take place, around the time Jeff met Cunanan; the segment of it I found doesn't contain any mention of this incident.)

After the break, we're in 1995 in San Diego, aboard the Gridley. Jeff heads below decks, and comes upon a fight, or rather one seaman punching another repeatedly in the face. Jeff pulls the puncher off, and the puncher says that "that f***** brushed against" him. Jeff helps the punchee, Williams, to his feet, and as the puncher is threatening Williams if he ever touches the puncher again, Williams knocks him down with a right cross and sneers, "I'm sorry -- did I touch you?" Jeff scatters the combatants and their audience.

That night, a hand puts a bar of soap in a sock (we don't see the item, but per my father, this is how barracks justice was handed down as of the sixties, so let's assume), and Jeff awakens to hear the sounds of a blanket partyalready in progress. It's Williams, no surprise, and the gag they've put on him is no match for his wails of agony. Jeff rushes over to break this up too, telling the participants to scatter or they'll get written up, and helps Williams into the shower to clean up -- and to convince him to go to a doctor, which Williams doesn't want, because he'll have to write a report and make a complaint. "You're hurt, you need a doctor," Jeff says patiently, but Williams hollers, "I need out! …Get me out. Get me reassigned. Please!" He's near tears, and panting from the pain. Jeff cups his cheek. Williams meets his eye, then grabs his arm and pulls Jeff down onto the shower bench with him and cries on Jeff's shoulder. Jeff nurturingly busses Williams's head, and the generous comfort Jeff offers Williams is painful to watch, because you know no good deed goes unpunished, on earth as it is in American Crime Story, so of course Jeff glances up to see a NASCAR-looking dude giving them a disgusted glare from the doorway, then flip-flopping away.

The next day, Jeff goes through the lunch line and into the mess, and the shot follows him as he looks for a spot to sit, then locks eyes with NASCAR mustache guy from the night before. (The actor's name is Ric Maddox, and I'd like to note that he has also played the Joker in a short film called Gay Batman. The sort of dialogue he has here can't be an enjoyable day at the office, and Maddox is good, doesn't sell it out with ham like he might want to.) Finn Wittrock gives us a flicker of "let's get this over with" as he walks over and sits firmly down at the last empty seat at Mustache's table. Mustache can't wait to launch into a story about a guy getting caught at a "hook-up place for f**s," asking if Jeff knows it. Jeff's like, um, no, and Mustache goes on that the MPs went in undercover and busted the spot. Great use of your budget there, y'all. Jeff asks if the guy got discharged; Mustache says no, not if he agrees to name "every f** he's ever blown," but the guy doesn't know names -- so he's going to provide a list of tattoos. Cut to a super-tight close-up on Mustache's beady eyes as he asks with subtle relish, "Got any tattoos, Jeff?" Jeff glances around the table and chuckles all "FOH with that," but…

…the next scene is Jeff in the showers again, this time with an exacto knife, his issued Zippo, bandages, and a Costco bottle of rubbing alcohol. This is painful to watch, but I have to wonder what kind of clandestine blowjobs everyone else is giving that they'd see, much less take note of, a tattoo on the calf. I mean, don't the pants stay pretty far up in that instance? -- unless that's the point, that Jeff's paranoia is that far-reaching (and perhaps justified). Anyway, he takes the blade to the Martian and starts carving, but only gets about a third of the way around before he has to stop.

The next day, we're in a handheld shot of Jeff supervising other seamen, including the puncher from earlier, who glares at him. He's told the captain wants to see him, and as he's heading for the captain's quarters through a warren of hallways, it seems like everyone he passes -- and needs must nearly brush up against in these tight quarters -- along the way is eyeing him suspiciously. He takes a quick breath and reports in to the captain, and maybe this got fixed for the air version, but we probably shouldn't see what looks like a Studio City parking lot out the porthole.

Jeff is told to have a seat, and does, at which time he spots blood seeping through his pantleg from the tattoo wound -- also apparently added in post, as it doesn't move when Jeff's leg does, so I assume they fixed that too. He tries not to freak out, but then the captain hands him a booklet entitled Dignity & Respect: A Training Guide On Homosexual Conduct Policy.

This comic book -- yes, "comic book" -- also existed, which might seem hard to believe if you haven't served or don't have family members in the service but is all too credible if you have/do. Like, the parachutist at the top right…"irony-free up-fuckery," is what my vet uncle would call this. Jeff too-quickly asks if there's some reason the captain's giving it to him. It's being circulated to all officers; does Jeff not think it's important? Jeff's like, of…course, sure. Does Jeff have any questions? "No sir!" Jeff gulps. "You haven't looked at it." Jeff then grimly recites the section of the…Uniform Code? Not sure if that applies here, actually, but it's the regulation that prohibits engaging in or even admitting to "homosexual acts." The captain stares at Jeff, then asks if he knows all the regulations by heart. "Most, sir," Jeff says, which tracks. "Open the book," he's told, so he does, staring dully at a page that overexplains what "Don't Ask" means. The captain asks again if he has questions, and when Jeff answers again that he doesn't, the captain goes on about a code of conduct, without which they're "nothing." "Nothing," Jeff repeats. So they're understood? "Yes, sir."

Nighttime. Jeff's in the shower again, this time poring over the comic. He pauses when he thinks he hears footsteps, then resumes, this time at the Don't Tell portion of the book.

Daytime. He's dressing in his whites, buffing his cap, shining his white shoes. I didn't even write a note about the visual reference to Lt. Col. Markinson in A Few Good Men, because that character's about to shoot himself, but maybe I was onto something, because then we're back in the shower, Jeff standing in his whites on the bench and contemplating the belt he's looped over a ceiling pipe.

Wittrock looks about twelve years old in this shot and it is buh-rutal. Jeff puts his head through and leans on the belt, but he can't go through with this either, although it's a harrowing couple minutes, and the mood isn't lifted by his despair as he sags, crying, onto the shower bench.

He's only slightly happier about the prospect of visiting a gay bar called Flicks, but he does it, albeit with baseball hat pulled fairly far down and a body language suggesting deep conflict. Company B's "Fascination" blares in the bar as he hesitantly orders a beer and looks around at the men smiling, the men smoking, the go-go boy with the American-flag briefs smizing at him. Beside him is Cunanan, who spots him as a rookie immediately. "Was it that obvious?" "There were a few clues," Cunanan smirks, and introduces himself.

Later, they're yukking it up at a table with a few empties as Jeff reveals that he's never gone to any gay bar before. Cunanan's shaggy-dog joke about the bartender setting off fireworks that make the shape of Jeff's name to mark the occasion wigs Jeff out momentarily, but Jeff sincerely thanks him for making the night un-humiliating. Cunanan preens that it's his honor, and he feels like he's part of Jeff's history. He asks if Jeff is military, and murmurs that it must be hard. Jeff agrees that it is. Cunanan switches gears, saying rules require him to buy Jeff drinks for the rest of the night and insisting Jeff put his money away. Jeff smiles to himself. At the bar, Cunanan watches him fondly.

Another time, at the same bar, Cunanan asks how it happens that CBS wants to interview Jeff. They came to the base and canvassed the straight soldiers, Jeff says; his part is sharing "the other side." Cunanan sputters that Jeff is crazy, they'll kick him out, but Jeff says they'll keep him in shadow so he can't be identified. "How humiliating," Cunanan breathes. Jeff doesn't get it, so Cunanan notes that the bigots get to stand in the light, uniforms on, proudly; Jeff gets to stay in the shadows with his voice distorted, "like a criminal." "Yep," Jeff says grimly. Of course this is how Cunanan thinks of it, and that the Navy will witch-hunt Jeff, that nobody cares what he has to say and it's not worth it, but it's something Jeff needs to do. He can't explain it.

He pulls up to a motel in his Jeep and gathers himself, then approaches one of the rooms.

Gianni and Antonio do the same, at a different hotel.

Jeff listens at the hotel-room door.

Gianni breathes, "My heart," and puts Antonio's hand on his chest to feel the hammering. "Mine too," Antonio laughs. Gianni wonders how many interviews he's done. Antonio puts Gianni's hand over his heart and says he can't count. "None like this," Gianni says. They kiss. Gianni knocks.

Jeff shakes hands with his interviewer.

Gianni shakes hands with his interviewer. As he's posing for pictures, Antonio stares into the middle distance; he's snapped out of the reverie by Gianni coming over for help zhuzhing his shirt.

Jeff's reassured that viewers will only see his silhouette, and that the MPs can't make the interviewer reveal his sources.

Gianni's interviewer confirms that Gianni understands he's on the record.

Jeff explains that the military is his life; it's all he ever wanted to do. Asked if anyone serving is out, Jeff says the majority are closeted, "and will always be closeted."

Gianni interrupts his interview to introduce Antonio in so many words as his partner, and to ask if they can do the interview together. The interviewer smiles warmly, knowing what he's witnessing, and says absolutely.

Jeff, meanwhile, isn't so optimistic, saying that he thinks talking to CBS is probably the end of his career. But at the same time, his career probably died a long time ago, he says, choking up. They know. They've never promoted him, even though he's a good sailor. "How do they know?" Jeff tells the story of saving Williams's life. It's slightly different from what we heard before in the phrasing, but we're still seeing these two men, both struggling to do the right thing, and the hopeful version of the right thing. Both killed by a guy who couldn't see any way to get love except to never tell the truth and to trade in shame instead of pride.

The day of Jeff's death. He comes home to find his apartment in bad-guest disarray and Cunanan performatively eating Froot Loops, four of which he probably left in the box, because: dickhead. Jeff sees his uniform hat on the table, stares at Cunanan, and heads into the bedroom without a word as Cunanan scrambles to his feet. Jeff finds his uniform on the bed and stalks back into the living room: "You went through my stuff?" Cunanan non-answers that he was going to tidy up, but Jeff interrupts that he touched Jeff's uniform. Cunanan was going to put it back: "So what?" "'So what'?" Jeff snarls. Cunanan's eyes narrow as he says he doesn't get why Jeff keeps it. Cunanan didn't serve his country; he'll never get it. No, Cunanan doesn't, not after how the Navy treated him. "You've never believed in anything except yourself," Jeff says, but Cunanan protests that he believed in Jeff, "didn't I," when the Navy didn't? "Everything you gave me, the bars, the meals, the men, it means nothing -- I want my life back!" Jeff says. He means his real life, as a soldier. Cunanan croons in an oh-honey tone that they never wanted him -- Cunanan wanted him! Jeff's like, pass, and says he doesn't know who Cunanan is; he doesn't stand for anything. He isn't anything, he's just a liar. "You have no honor," Jeff finishes, heading back into the bedroom.

Now Cunanan's pissed, and tries to take control of the situation/Jeff, sneering that Jeff's not in the Navy anymore, "sweetie" -- he's a washed-up [slur] with a shitty job, in a shitty condo, "bitching about how you could have been someone." This is Cunanan, really, not Jeff, but Jeff says he's right about that. Cunanan attempts to pull rank by announcing grandly that, when Jeff walked into "that bar," he saved Jeff. Jeff: "You destroyed me!" He wishes he'd never gone into that bar; he wishes he'd never met Cunanan. Cunanan switches gears, saying Jeff's confused and can't see it, but Jeff can see it: "I see it, I feel it, I hate it." I think he means that what he sees and feels keep him from what he truly loves, serving in the Navy, but I'd hear arguments. In any case, Cunanan is still trying to work the tractor beam, putting his hands up to Jeff's face and starting to say he loved Jeff so much, but Jeff swats Cunanan's hands away, knocking him back a step: "No one! Wants! Your love!"

Cunanan Starmans out of the room, gathering his bag (with Jeff's gun on top) and leaving without a word.

David is opening the door to let his "friend" out and finds Cunanan just standing there. Cunanan brushes in, in between David and the friend, without being invited in. "Andrew!" Cunanan parks it on the coffee table: "Yes?" David didn't hear the buzzer. Cunanan didn't want to bother (read: alert) David, so he "just slipped in behind someone else." The friend's like, yikes, and David has to whisper that he'll call. He fastens his bathrobe tightly, and is about to get into it when Cunanan fake-haltingly mentions what David said "about needing help." Can they talk tonight? "Sure," David this-fucking-guys, and goes into the bedroom. Cunanan schemes.

Jeff irons his uniform and folds it neatly away.

While David showers, Cunanan calls Jeff to neener that he has Jeff's gun; he borrowed it to protect David from a stalker who's back in town. As Jeff is bitching at him about having a license and how the gun never leaves the apartment, Cunanan smiles smugly at the trap he's going to spring. Jeff says he'll come over and retrieve it, but he's done with Cunanan -- done. Cunanan tries to grade-school that Jeff said that already, but Jeff hangs up on him. Cunanan wanders into the area of David's loft that's under construction and eyes the hammer.

Jeff's downstairs now, banging on the broken buzzer. Cunanan asks if David's going to get the door, but this time, David asks if he's joking, and Cunanan grumps that Jeff is "very hostile at the moment" and he'd rather not get into it with him in the foyer. As David's letting Jeff in, Cunanan is selecting the hammer and taking up his lurking post. We see him hear Jeff say he never wants to see Cunanan again, and again here the dialogue is somewhat shuffled from what we saw last week, but it may air differently -- or be a "what Cunanan 'hears' and what's actually happening aren't the same" thing. It doesn't change the ending, unfortunately, and we cut from the door swinging shut and Cunanan rushing Jeff…

…to Jeff's sister getting wheeled into labor, hollering in pain. Slow pan across Jeff's empty apartment as his parents leave various messages about the labor and delivery; fade out on Jeff's hat, neatly atop the uniform box, as Jeff's parents inform him that he has a niece, and everyone's healthy.

#acs versace #previously tv #epic old school recaps #2.05 #recap #review #article #february 2018

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magg0t-bible · 7 years ago

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Top 20 Favourite Alt-J Songs

The title is pretty self explanatory so I’m just gonna jump right in

(Also I’ll be briefly explaining what I like about each one, so another long post. Feel free to skip through if you just want to know the songs)

20. Left Hand Free

Generally a really nice bop. It is arguably their most poppy song, and quite different from most of their other music, but it’s still recognisably them, which is what I love. Honestly all I have to hear is the guitar intro and I’m already dancing like an idiot

ALSO there’s a really cute interview/live performance that the band did on KEXP (I’ll insert the link at the end if I can be bothered) where they’re playing this song and in the bit where it goes back to “ain’t shady baby I’m hot”, Gus starts clapping to the beat and makes Joe laugh so much that he can’t even sing it properly and it’s v cute

(Also the little “speakeasy” about halfway through is sexy ngl)

19. Interlude 3 ❦

Strange choice I know, but hear me out. I love the simplicity of this interlude, because it’s literally just 58 seconds of piano and quiet vocalising over the top, but it WORKS SO WELL. Plus it’s placed between a heavier song and a more gentle song on the album, so it’s an interesting way of transitioning.

18. Taro

I have such good memories of the first time I heard Taro. I associate it with getting up early in the morning and going for a walk, as cheesy as that sounds - it just generally fills me with so much happiness. I think it’s very well composed, and that INSTRUMENTAL!! I love it!!!

Not to mention the lyrics about the two war photographers (Robert Capa and Gerda Taro) are very interesting. In general I just really love the different topics that Alt-J write about in their songs.

17. Arrival In Nara

This is such a beautiful, peaceful and gentle song. The piano in the first half sets the song up so nicely, and it’s complemented well with the really light vocals. Especially when Joe and Gus harmonise for the “though I cannot see I can hear her smile as she sings”....I’m dead

16. Intro (This Is All Yours version)

Even though this song does take some time to build up, I’d definitely say it’s worth the wait. The layers are built up so gradually and effectively, and by the time the drums come in, it’s just....it’s just amazing. Wow.

15. Ms

I actually used to skip this song when I first listened to An Awesome Wave, not because I didn’t like it, just because it didn’t really stand out to me that much. WELL.

You know that meme that’s been recreated a million times that says “when you listen to that one song on the album you always skip and it’s actually fire”? Yeah, that’s Ms. The lyrics are beautiful, the a cappella on “the dark seeks dark” works so nicely, and the instrumental after “the nights of all my youth pressed into one glass of water/the shadow burns across like embers tide paper” is so incredibly relaxing.

14. 3WW

I remember one day early in 2017, I said to myself, “it’d be really nice to see Alt-J live, but they haven’t made any music in like, three years. Oh well.”

THE. LITERAL. NEXT. DAY. My friend texted me saying that they’d released a teaser for a new song. So after running round my house hyperventilating and whisper-screaming (don’t worry, I was home alone), I went onto YouTube and listened to the 30-second teaser of 3WW.

AND MY MIND WAS BLOWN. Even more so when I listened to the full song. Gus’ vocals in the beginning are AMAZING - so glad he finally got a solo. Ellie Rowsell’s vocals halfway through are so perfectly placed, and she was definitely the right woman for the job. The instrumentation is absolutely beautiful. Overall the song is just a masterpiece.

13. Hunger Of The Pine

The first song I ever heard from This Is All Yours. I love the way it begins, with Joe singing without any accompaniment apart from that repeating note. It’s another song that builds up nicely, especially by the time the drums come in, and that Miley Cyrus sample?! I had no idea it was her, it just blends in so well.

This is definitely the sort of song you should listen to with headphones on, preferably also with your eyes closed. It’s such an experience and it really takes me places.

(Also shoutout to Gus and his awesome French skills towards the end)

12. The Gospel Of John Hurt

This song is quite similar to HOTP, in the way that it focuses on layers and starts in a very simplistic way before building up. I really like the drums in the second verse and chorus, and the tempo change right after that. I also thought it was cool that the first time Joe sings “Jeremiah” it’s kind of gentle and airy, but then the second time it’s more like “JeremiAHHHHHH” idk it’s cool

And every chorus after the tempo change just makes me feel like my soul has been awoken because W O W

11. Dissolve Me

The first few months of 2017 were a bit difficult for me, and An Awesome Wave as a whole really helped me through them. However, Dissolve Me stood out because of the line “she makes the sound, the sound the sea makes, to calm me down”. My difficulties were to do with my anxiety, and listening to this song helped me to relax like you wouldn’t believe. So it holds a special place in my heart for that reason.

My favourite part has to be the ending when Joe and Gus are harmonising with the “ohhh” and then the chords from the intro come back, and they take it in turns to sing “she makes the sound the sea makes, knee deep in the north”. Absolutely spectacular, even more so live.

10. Something Good

This song definitely lives up to its title. As far is I’m concerned, if you tell me that you can listen to the drums in the intro and not want to dance, you’re a liar. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.

The vocals in the verses are honestly so groovy, and the choruses are somewhat gentle, but they still make me want to get up and dance. The drums throughout the whole song also give it a really nice vibe.

9. Interlude 1/The Ripe & Ruin ❦

I have a surprisingly strong connection with this song, and I’ll explain why. The lyrics are generally about finding balance in your life, but they more specifically describe a woman who constantly counts her steps while walking and makes sure to “abide by the law that she herself has set”. One of my idiosyncrasies has always been pretty much exactly this, and I’ve always thought I was weird for doing it, so this interlude makes me feel lot less alone. Plus the lack of music makes it feel much more intimate.

8. In Cold Blood

AN ACTUAL BANGER. That’s pretty much all I need to say.

The way it instantly begins. The fact that the numbers in the beginning are backwards binary code for ∆, meaning it’s the world’s most cryptic name drop. The line “all above crowd around so fucking loud”. The brass in the chorus. The way the music at the end of the chorus just instantly stops, Joe sings “in cold blood”, and then the music comes right back. I LOVE IT ALL.

7. Tessellate

Tessellate was the song that led me to discover Alt-J, thanks to my extreme obsession with the Ellie Goulding cover that spent a long time being my favourite song ever. I will admit that my younger, unappreciative self wasn’t huge fan of the original song initially, partially because I saw some of the dodgy looking people in the music video lip syncing to the song and naturally thought they were the band. But over time, I decided to give Alt-J another go, and it was probably one of the best decisions I’ve ever made. And I obviously LOVE Tessellate now.

6. Adeline

I’m pretty sad I didn’t get to see this song live, but listening to it at home with headphones is a magical enough experience. It has such powerful lyrics, the way everything gradually builds up is just so beautiful (yes I say that a lot, but they do it a lot okay), it’s just incredible. Especially that end bit where Gus is singing “ohhhhh my Adeline” and you hear the “YAAA YAAA YAAA” over the top. MIND=BLOWN.

5. Matilda

I can honestly say that it was love at first listen with Matilda. Given that I’d been introduced to Alt-J with Breezeblocks and Tessellate, it was nice to listen to something that was a little more light and gentle (in my opinion). I love the way the song references the film Léon, and the drum beat right at the start of the first verse is so peaceful and nice to listen to.

4. Fitzpleasure

When I first got into Alt-J and I’d only heard An Awesome Wave, Fitzpleasure was actually my number 1 favourite song of theirs. I obviously still love it, given that it’s now number 4. The bass line (and guitar in general) is so COOL!! It’s such a groovy sounding song and I love the way it switches between Joe singing a cappella and heavy bass. 10/10.

(P.S. yes I know what the song is about, and no, we are not discussing that today.)

3. Pleader

My favourite Relaxer song, the music video for which has made me cry on multiple occasions. The introductory violins, the way everything is layered, the vocals, the lyrics, basically this song just makes me feel every single emotion at once and it gives me goosebumps and it’s AMAZING. What a killer song to end an album with.

2. Bloodflood

This may come as a surprise, but I actually took ages to listen to this song. I didn’t actually listen to An Awesome Wave from start to finish, I kinda just put it on my laptop and listened to each song gradually, which I now realise was not the best idea. But HOLY MOLY. BLOODFLOOD.

I don’t think I need to say much about this song, because every Alt-J fan knows why it’s amazing. However, it is only number 2, because in terms of personal connections and meaning, there is only one song that can top it.

And that song is......

*drumroll*

1. Nara

WOW. Where to even start. The first time I listened to This Is All Yours (actually from start to finish this time), Nara just stuck out to me for some reason. I have always been a huge supporter of the LGBT+ community, and hearing a song about a gay relationship is just really nice for me. It’s incredibly powerful due to its description of how difficult it is to be gay in a situation where that isn’t truly accepted.

As well as that, the repetition of “hallelujah, Bovay, Alabama” at the end always hits me right in the feels. It’s such a simple motif, yet it works so well as an outro, especially if you understand why they chose those specific words.

So there you go, my top 20 favourite Alt-J songs. Congratulations if you made it this far.

Honourable Mentions

(aka songs that could’ve been on the list but I only thought of them after I’d finished writing the list and I couldn’t be bothered changing it so here they are)

Breezeblocks

Bloodflood pt. II

Deadcrush

Every Other Freckle

Intro (An Awesome Wave version)

Last Year

Portrait

353

Ok I promise I’m done now

[Here’s the interview if you’re interested, Left Hand Free is at 7:14]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RrqIws8Q7H4&t=441s

#alt-j #alt j #top 20 songs #basically just ranting about a band that has my WHOLE MF HEART #garden of eden

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vitaevictoria · 6 years ago

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Every Book I Read in 2018: Part 2 http://bit.ly/2Fr2swN

Let's finish this list! It's already 2019, baby! Here are the rest of the books I read in 2018. I read SEVENTY (70!) in total, which is the most I've ever read in a year. Make sure you follow me on Goodreads to see what I read this year! 36. The Miseducation of Cameron Post by Emily M. Danforth Read in Sarande, Albania. Had this on my Kindle for years but was saving it for when I ran out of physical books to read which was easy to do since ALL of the books on hostel shelves were in German. The writing is nothing to write home about (lol) and it could've easily been shorter. I'm sure the movie is better. 37. The Heart Goes Last by Margaret Atwood Read in Greece. This is the third Atwood book I've tried to read but the only one I've actually succeeded in reading. It was alright. 38. The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald The only book in English at the last hostel on my last stop in Greece. Finished on the plane going home. Read it once in high school but also enjoyed it this time! 39. Upstream by Mary Oliver Read in my bedroom. My first book back on American soil! It's been on my to-read list for a while so I was excited to read it. There are some really good passages but Oliver might be too smart for me. 40. The Witch Elm by Tana French I gasped when I saw this on the shelf at the library. French is one of my favorite authors and this is her first standalone book. Compared to her other books it wasn't her best, but not-her-best is still better than most people's greatest. 41. Crazy Rich Asians by Kevin Kwan Read at my aunt's beach house. Read for bookclub. I probably wouldn't have finished this book if it wasn't a bookclub pick. It just...wasn't good. Would be more bearable as an audiobook. 42. Buffering by Hannah Hart Also read at my aunt's beach house (I had nothing to do there but read). I'm not big into YouTube but I enjoy memoirs and this one blew my socks off. Hannah has been through A LOT and discusses the complexity of love and family. 43. Braving the Wilderness by Brene Brown [AUDIOBOOK] Listened to in my car. Not good. Hard pass. 44. The Inexplicable Logic of My Life by Benjamin Alire Saenz Read on my couch. I loved Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe but this was a big disappointment compared to that one. 45. My Year of Rest and Relaxation by Ottessa Moshfegh Read on my couch. Definitely wasn't what I thought it would be but I still loved it. I LOVE self-absorbed, unreliable female narrators. 46. Lethal White by J. K. Rowling Read at my grandma's house. This is the fourth book in her Cormoran Strike series and wasn't the best. I'm looking forward to the next one since I have a feeling it will be better. 47. The Power by Naomi Alderman Read half on my friend's couch in the Scottish highlands, finished it at home. Loved this book and would be a great one for kids to read in high school. 48. Talking as Fast as I Can by Lauren Graham [AUDIOBOOK] Listened to in my car. Covers a bit of Gilmore Girls and a bit of the rest of her life. Listening to this feels like a big sister giving life advice. Some bits could've been cut out but I mostly enjoyed it. 49. Paper Girls vol. 1 by Brian K. Vaughan Read at my aunt's. I've never read a comic before and I think I need to read a few before my brain gets adjusted to the rhythm of them, but this was good! 50. They Both Die at the End by Adam Silvera Read on my aunt's front porch. Very disappointing. I really wanted to like it but the writing has no pizzazz. 51. Carve the Mark by Veronica Roth

Read in my room. It was alright! Not as good as Divergent but one of the better YA books I've read. I've heard the sequel is better so I'll read that. 52. Heartburn by Nora Ephron Read in my childhood bedroom. I read this in one day, it's that good (and that short). No one can write like Ephron. She is so smart and so funny and I'm so sad she's gone. 53. Georgia Peaches and Other Forbidden Fruit by Jaye Robin Brown This is about a lesbian pastor daughter's in Georgia and I was so excited to read it and yet I was so disappointed! The writing was bland and it just felt like a lot of wish-fulfillment and didn't really reflect evangelical Christian culture at all. 54. Conversations with Friends by Sally Rooney A breath of fresh air after a lackluster book. There are no quotation marks which annoys me when Cormac McCarthy does it but is smart when done by Rooney. This book is weird and a little fucked up and none of the characters are perfect and I LOVED it. Can't wait to read more by Rooney. 55. The Diviners by Libba Bray [AUDIOBOOK] My first loan using the Libby app, which I highly recommend! Your library probably has it, or something similar! The narrator, January LaVoy, is very talented and can do lots of different voices. Can't wait to listen to the other books in this series. 56. The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue Mackenzi Lee Gay and fun and cute! Definitely want to read the sequel in 2019. 57. An American Marriage by Tayari Jones I wish I loved this as much as everyone else does. 58. I'll Be Gone in the Dark by Michelle McNamara [AUDIOBOOK] Brilliant and chilling to listen to. Usually, I would never want to re-listen to an audiobook but this one was so good. 59. We Are Okay by Nina LaCour Probably would've like this more if I read it in high school. Decent and quick. 60. Truth and Beauty by Ann Patchett [AUDIOBOOK] I loved Commonwealth by Patchett and she narrates this one. It was alright! And probably very therapeutic for her to write. 61. Just Kids by Patti Smith I love this and her! M Train is next on my list. She sings a song called "Because the Night" written by Bruce Springsteen and it's an honest to goodness bop. 62. By Nightfall by Michael Cunningham [AUDIOBOOK] Read by Hugh Dancy who does a HORRIBLE Virginian accent but I loved every second of this book. Over the top introspective which is right up my alley. 63. How to Be a Person in the World by Heather Havrilesky Alright! Better to read slowly over time. Or just read Tiny Beautiful Things by Cheryl Strayed. 64. Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine by Gail Honeyman During all the hype of this book and no ONE EVER BOTHERED TO MENTION THAT IT'S SET IN GLASGOW!!! Loved this book so much and will definitely read again in the future. It's just so soft and kind and honestly a great guide on how to be an adult??? 65. The Perfect Nanny by Leila Slimani Beautiful and creepy and artsy and probably even better in the original French! Must learn French! 66. We Should All Be Feminists by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie [AUDIOBOOK] Always been meaning to read this. A great starter to feminism and something that every gender should read (would be a great high school or middle school read). 67. Women & Money by Suze Orman [AUDIOBOOK] Trying to up my financial literacy. This book was alright. It's definitely aimed at a middle-aged woman freshly out of a divorce who doesn't even know the passwords to her bank accounts. Suze is brutally honest and I respect her for that. 68. Gmorning, Gnight! by Lin-Manuel Miranda Cute and quick and definitely want to buy for my nightstand so I can annotate it/read it whenever I need a pick me up. 69. On Tyranny by Timothy Snyder [AUDIOBOOK] Not as much fearmongering as I thought there would be. This reads like a to-do list to be a good citizen. Take this book with a grain of salt and a pinch of optimism. 70. Talking to Women by Nell Dunn Started reading in Sweden when I borrowed Poppy's copy and was able to buy my own when I was unexpectedly stranded in London for a few days, so yay, silver lining! It's a transcript of Dunn's conversations with her friends in 60's London and it's mindboggling how so much and so little has changed about women's lives since. My goal for 2019 is to read at least 50 books! Let's do this!

#Travel #solo travel #solo female travel #backpacking #travel blogger #budget travel

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sableaire · 8 years ago

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is sangwoo as much of an asshole in Korean or is that a cultural misunderstanding? Obv. He's abusive but is majority of his dialogue as abusive or is some of the dialogue just an acceptable bluntness? I'm not sure I'm asking this right sorry

(I know I said I was going to wind down with the translation posts, but I forgot I had this in my drafts, woops; in any case, this will probably be the last of its kind, so have fun)

Boy, oh boy, I was going to put off translating some of his lines until later, but this is such a perfect opportunity. To answer your question, first of all, he’s using informal register with someone older than him that he doesn’t know well. That’s already blatantly rude. People even one year older technically have the social right to go, “Informal? Are you being informal with me? Do you want to die??” (and it’s such a highschool bullying stereotype tbh)

It would be fine if Bum gave Sangwoo permission to speak to him in informal register, but Bum isn’t really in a position to grant any kind of permission right now. So Sangwoo’s being rude from the get go. On top of that, Korean is super context-heavy, so regardless of the words he’s saying (which are aggressive as heck), his demeanor and actions make them abusive. I’m not sure if Sangwoo’s ironic sense of humor comes through in the English, but there’s that too.

I’ve hinted at it before, but Sangwoo is way more menacing in Korean than in English for two reasons: the Korean language is more efficient with speech bubble space, and the Korean language is highly sensory due to onomatopoeia being used as descriptors. That being said, the post you’ve all been waiting for, some of the verbal violence you’ve been missing out on:

First of all there’s this post describing one of the first lines Sangwoo says to Bum, and then this one about how manipulative Sangwoo is from the get go. I had this whole thing written about the one line Sangwoo says after he pours porridge on Bum’s face, but it ended up too long so here, have a separate post for that too.

So with those out of the way, let’s start with Chapter 3. First let me just get a mistranslation out of the way:

That ‘clang’ says ‘탁’ in Korean, which is literally ‘tak,’ and it’s a sfx that implies more of how something is hitting another thing rather than what is hitting what. If you look at the motion lines, it’s pretty obvious that Sangwoo threw the pill bottle at Bum and not the pole he’s chained to, meaning that the sfx should have been translated to “Thwack” or something else. So from the get-go, Korean Sangwoo earns an extra violence point.

When he’s cutting Bum with the can lid, he says he’s doing it “Since I need to punish you…” but the Korean reads “엄살 부린 벌 정돈되려나…” which is pretty different and arguably scarier.

The word “엄살” means “overreaction” and more specifically “complaining about pain or hardship as if it’s worse than it is,” and that alone probably gives you a sense that Sangwoo is saying utter nonsense right there, but let me translate the original for you:

“I wonder if this will at least be enough punishment for your overreacting…[?]” In the Korean, he’s pretty clearly speaking to himself, kind of just wondering out loud. A direct translation sounds unwieldy in English, but the implication is a little scarier because wow, you broke this poor man’s legs, I doubt anything is an overreaction at that point.

Anyway, I also mentioned his ironic sense of humor, right? Well, this is when the Korean honorific system comes into play. Later, during the shower scene, Bum begs to be allowed out of the basement because it’s “too dark and moist and stuffy,” and Sangwoo’s reponse in the English is “Of course it’s dark… it’s a basement.”

The Korean translates as follows: “Of course it is. It’s a basement, Yoon Bum-ssi.” Sangwoo speaks here in polite register, uses Bum’s full name, and an honorific. That is cutting irony, and the politeness burns with condescension. I’m not sure if the nuance quite carries over to non-Korean-speakers.

Basically imagine this same situation except if Bum was a doctor, and you would expect any reasonable person to call him Dr. Yoon in respect of that. However, this whole time, Sangwoo has been calling this doctor by his first name, and then in this one instance goes, “Of course it’s all those things. It’s a basement, Dr. Yoon.” It’s a similar feeling of condescension to that.

Anyway, moving on to the parts I was excited to translate. When Bum considers trying to crawl to the doorway but doesn’t, Sangwoo appears and mocks him for it. In the English, he appears eerily no-faced and saying “Retard~” which I suppose is the literal translation, but it arguably loses too much of the tone the original uses when it says “뷔웅신~” which was said in the equivalent of “styuuupid”. In fact, just “Stuuupid~” might have arguably been a better translation. Maybe it wouldn’t have been harsh enough? Anyway.

There’s a lot of impact missing in this translation, but it can’t be helped. Translating the Korean directly into English would have made it too long to be natural and also not fit in the speech bubble. What the Korean says here is, “무릎 깨지도록 기어갔으면 나갈 수 있었을텐데” which translates into as follows:

“If you crawled hard enough to shatter your knees, you probably would have made it.”

And then the scene that got me to write this post is actually the knife scene because the Korean language got it a lot scarier. Sangwoo can be vivid with his words, oh boy. The English version reads as follows:

“I’ll pull your neck back… // … and slice it up. // Nice. And. Slowly. // At the same steady speed. Sliiiiiice…”

It’s similar to the Korean, but due to speech bubble constraints, a lot of imagery was lost. The Korean translates to something more like this:

“I’ll yank back your neck until the vessels burst from your throat // I’ll shave the flesh from the end of your chin, first // On the skin stretched taut, very slowly // without hurry, at a steady speed [I’ll] // draaaaaaaaag…”

He uses a Korean sound effect there “쭈우우우욱” which is the onomatopoeia used to indicate something being dragged or pulled against slight resistance. It carries connotations of light strain, and the more the sound is stretched out, the more stretch we expect to feel.

Scary, scary, isn’t it?

In the flashback scenes in Chapter 9 involving Sangwoo at the gay bar, Korean readers get an extra sense of how manipulative Sangwoo was being. In the Korean, while at the gay bar, Sangwoo clearly calls the older guy 형 ‘hyung’, a word meaning ‘older brother’ and clearly this man is too old for Sangwoo to be calling him ‘hyung’. Calling someone significantly older than you (who is well into their adulthood, middle-aged and up) by one of Korea’s ‘sibling’ terms is a blatant act of flattery and or flirtation. Unless you’re actually siblings, in which case the age doesn’t really matter, but that is irrelevant to this comic.

Sangwoo’s entire demeanor in this chapter got a little lost in translation. He’s a lot more verbally gungho about this than the English managed to convey. Where the English read “How about it? You’re going to be the masters of your own fate! What a joke!” he was actually saying:

“Doesn’t that sound fun? One of you two will be choosing death with your own hand! Like an idiot!” with that same delighted grin.

His next line, “But it’ll be exciting, like a rollercoaster” is a correct translation, but I’m sad that the English language doesn’t have an equivalent for the Korean word “짜릿” in the original.

“짜릿” is pronounced “jjarit” and the way to pronounce the double-j romanization is by vocalizing a “ch”. If you say “ch” there’s only the sound of air, right? Add your voice to it, and you get a tense, strained kind of “j” sound. That’s the ㅉ in Korean. The Korean word is pronounced ‘jj’, the ‘a’ from ‘ah!’, and ‘rit’ with a clipped long e. The emphasis is on the first syllable, so it goes “JJA-rit.”

I don’t know if the feeling of the word carries over to English, but in Korea it’s basically a feeling onomatopoeia. The word sounds like and means that little jolt of thrill that you get from something exciting. Scientifically, it’s probably the feeling you get from a rush of dopamine. So, in any case, Sangwoo’s Korean dialogue forces more of a feeling from the reader just because Korean has a specific word for it.

In Chapter 10, when Sangwoo is telling the man to stab Bum, the English reads “You’re going to need to go Splat! Splat! And stab him,” but the onomatopoeia Korean uses is “푸슉푸슉” which reads like “pushyuk pushyuk” with the u pronounced how it would be in Japanese romanization. Now, I didn’t know this, but a Korean friend of mind commented that that sound effect also functions as an innuendo. Go figure.

Funnily enough, Sangwoo’s arguably most emotionally violent scene (his breakdown in Chapter 13 when he thought Bum escaped) is translated pretty much as well as it can be, save for one key point. The English says, “I’ll rip him apart! Just like with that girl!” but the Korean meaning is as follows, with the most important difference bolded:

“I’ll rip him apart like meat with my hands, just like with that woman, just…! I’ll tear him apart…!”

The connotations between girl and woman are different, and in Korean, if he meant someone young enough to think of as a ‘girl’ rather than a ‘young woman’ or older, he probably would have used a different word. Also, more violent imagery, yay.

And from this point on, it’s not so much Sangwoo’s aggression that gets lost in translation so much as his affection, and that’s worrying in whole other ways. It should be noted that even though the Korean translations sound a lot more aggressive, Korean speakers are kind of used to used to the natural onomatopoeias and imagery in our language, so these direct translations probably sound a little scarier to you all than the Korean did to me… at the same time, the Korean was scarier than the English, so, whatever, here you go, aha.

#typical-doggo #killing stalking #ks lost in translation #abuse//#violence//#ks mistranslation #lost in translation

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wetrumpfeed · 6 years ago

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Afternoon MAGAthread: YOUR WEEKLY PRESIDENTIAL RECAP!

HAPPY SATURDAY DEPLORABLES!

This is your favorite Saturday afternoon mod here to deliver you TONS of spicy dankness from the past week! If you happened to miss any past recaps you can catch those here!

Sunday, June 9th:

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

Another false report in the Failing @nytimes. We have been trying to get some of these Border Actions for a long time, as have other administrations, but were not able to get them, or get them in full, until our signed agreement with Mexico. Additionally, and for many years,.... ... .....Mexico was not being cooperative on the Border in things we had, or didn’t have, and now I have full confidence, especially after speaking to their President yesterday, that they will be very cooperative and want to get the job properly done. Importantly, some things..... ... .....not mentioned in yesterday press release, one in particular, were agreed upon. That will be announced at the appropriate time. There is now going to be great cooperation between Mexico & the USA, something that didn’t exist for decades. However, if for some unknown reason... ... .....there is not, we can always go back to our previous, very profitable, position of Tariffs - But I don’t believe that will be necessary. The Failing @nytimes, & ratings challenged @CNN, will do anything possible to see our Country fail! They are truly The Enemy of the People!

For two years all the Democrats talked about was the Mueller Report, because they knew that it was loaded up with 13 Angry Democrat Trump Haters, later increased to 18. But despite the bias, when the Report came out, the findings were No Collusion and facts that led to........ ... ....No Obstruction. The Dems were devastated - after all this time and money spent ($40,000,000), the Mueller Report was a disaster for them. But they want a Redo, or Do Over. They are even bringing in @CNN sleazebag attorney John Dean. Sorry, no Do Overs - Go back to work!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Left-wing racism is real

Mexican military begins arresting migrants riding 'The Beast' train to US border - More than 200 migrants got off the train and fled," said the director of the Digna Ochoa Human Rights Center - Many "hid in the bush, so only 25 were arrested," - Its better than our Democrats have done so far

If a straight pride parade is absurd, so is a gay pride parade. It is obviously insane to suggest that a person can only be proud of their sexuality if they are gay. Outrage over straight pride is hypocrisy on steroids.

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

How do “they” Ignore the Most Beautiful FLOTUS Ever?

Good question... how do they?

Still waiting for that apology from Adam Schiff

Old school, kick-in-the-ass presidency!

Monday, June 10th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

Memorandum on Presidential Determination Pursuant to Section 303 of the Defense Production Act of 1950, as amended

First Lady Melania Trump's Visit to the United Kingdom

President Trump Greets the 103rd Indianapolis 500 Champions: Team Penske

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

Now with our new deal, Mexico is doing more for the USA on Illegal Immigration than the Democrats. In fact, the Democrats are doing NOTHING, they want Open Borders, which means Illigal Immigration, Drugs and Crime.

We have fully signed and documented another very important part of the Immigration and Security deal with Mexico, one that the U.S. has been asking about getting for many years. It will be revealed in the not too distant future and will need a vote by Mexico’s Legislative body!.. ... ....We do not anticipate a problem with the vote but, if for any reason the approval is not forthcoming, Tariffs will be reinstated!

When will the Failing New York Times admit that their front page story on the the new Mexico deal at the Border is a FRAUD and nothing more than a badly reported “hit job” on me, something that has been going on since the first day I announced for the presidency! Sick Journalism

Video

Thank you @MarkLevinShow and John Eastman!

Can’t believe they are bringing in John Dean, the disgraced Nixon White House Counsel who is a paid CNN contributor. No Collusion - No Obstruction! Democrats just want a do-over which they’ll never get!

I have been briefed on the helicopter crash in New York City. Phenomenal job by our GREAT First Responders who are currently on the scene. THANK YOU for all you do 24/7/365! The Trump Administration stands ready should you need anything at all.

Congratulations to the 2019 Indianapolis 500 Winner @IMS, @SimonPagenaud and @Team_Penske! @IndyCar🏆🏁

Video

#AmericaFIRST #MAGA🇺🇸

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Robert Mueller exploited cellphone GPS to track Trump associates

Uber Driver threatens passenger: She replied by saying “Tell me you don’t support Trump or I won’t finish this trip.”

Jim Acosta is a master of the self-own.

Trump: “John Dean’s been a loser for many years” ...as Dean refuses to acknowledge how much money he has been paid by CNN for accusations against the President 🤣🇺🇸

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

To all the pedes down in the trenches, I support you!

PSA: If you have a family member with disabilities, please ensure they have one of these devices to assist first responders

It’s funny because it’s accurate

It Is oN SpEcTruM

Sorry frens, but you have to go back! True frens respect the rule of law!

Tuesday, June 11th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

President Donald J. Trump Announces Judicial Nominees

Executive Order on Modernizing the Regulatory Framework for Agricultural Biotechnology Products

President Trump Delivers a Statement Upon Departure

President Trump Delivers Remarks on Renewable Energy

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

New book just out, “The Real Deal, My Decade Fighting Battles and Winning Wars With Trump,” is really wonderful. It is written by two people who are very smart & know me well, George Sorial & Damian Bates, as opposed to all the books where the author has no clue who I am. ENJOY!

“Jerry Nadler’s Trump Bashing Show Is A Bust.” Headline, New York Post. @foxandfriends The Greatest Witch Hunt of all time continues. All crimes were by the other side, but the Committee refuses to even take a look. Deleting 33,000 Emails is the real Obstruction - and much more!

“Mueller has spoken. He found No Collusion between the Trump Campaign and the Russians. The bottom line is what the Democrat House is doing is trying to destroy the Trump Presidency (which has been a tremendous success), and I can assure you that we’re done with the Mueller...... ... ....investigation in the Senate. They can talk to John Dean until the cows come home, we’re not doing anything in the Senate regarding the Mueller Report. We are going to harden our Infrastructure against 2020!” @LindseyGrahamSC

PRESIDENTIAL HARASSMENT!

Sad when you think about it, but Mexico right now is doing more for the United States at the Border than the Democrats in Congress! @foxandfriends

The United States has VERY LOW INFLATION, a beautiful thing!

This is because the Euro and other currencies are devalued against the dollar, putting the U.S. at a big disadvantage. The Fed Interest rate way too high, added to ridiculous quantitative tightening! They don’t have a clue!

Maria, Dagan, Steve, Stuart V - When you are the big “piggy bank” that other countries have been ripping off for years (to a level that is not to be believed), Tariffs are a great negotiating tool, a great revenue producers and, most importantly, a powerful way to get...... ... ...Companies to come to the U.S.A and to get companies that have left us for other lands to come back home. We stupidly lost 30% of our auto business to Mexico. If the Tariffs went on at the higher level, they would all come back, and pass. But very happy with the deal I made,... ... ....If Mexico produces (which I think they will). Biggest part of deal with Mexico has not yet been revealed! China is similar, except they devalue currency and subsidize companies to lessen effect of 25% Tariff. So far, little effect to consumer. Companies will relocate to U.S.

Good day in the Stock Market. People have no idea the tremendous potential our Country has for GROWTH - and many other things!

“Why did the Democrats run if they didn’t want to do things?” @SenRickScott

On my way to Iowa - just heard nearly 1,000 agriculture groups signed a letter urging Congress to approve the USMCA. Our Patriot Farmers & rural America have spoken! Now Congress must do its job & support these great men and women by passing the bipartisan USMCA Trade Agreement!

Today, here in Iowa, we honor America’s cherished farming heritage. We salute your commitment to American Energy Independence — and we celebrate the bright future we are forging together powered by clean, affordable AMERICAN ETHANOL!

“Trump administration gives final approval for year-round E15 use”

Beautiful afternoon in Iowa. Thank you to all of our Nation’s Farmers. May God bless you, and may God Bless America!

“Someone should call Obama up. The Obama Administration spied on a rival presidential campaign using Federal Agencies. I mean, that seems like a headline to me?” @TuckerCarlson It will all start coming out, and the Witch Hunt will end. Presidential Harassment!

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

The mad lad is at the Google campus in Austin, Texas](https://www.reddit.com/r/The_Donald/comments/bzgr6o/the_mad_lad_is_at_the_google_campus_in_austin/)

We just cracked 750k PEDES!

Nearly 1,700 Pedos Arrested Nationwide in 2 Months During DOJ Sting OP (6/11/2019)

NEW PROJECT VERITAS: Tech Insider Blows Whistle on How Pinterest Listed Top Pro-Life Site as Porn, "Bible Verses" Censored

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

This is why I love living in Texas.

❄️ Liberals Hate Glaciers Now ❄️

Or tariffs per trade deal made.

TFW you're banned from all of social media but other patriots are doing God's work spreading your message

Wednesday, June 12th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

Six Nominations and Two Withdrawals Sent to the Senate

President Trump Participates in a 2:2 Bilateral Meeting with the President of Poland

President Trump Participates in a Joint Press Conference with the President of Poland

President Trump Remarks on the Opioid Crisis

President Trump Participates in a Joint Signing Ceremony with the President of Poland

President Trump and the First Lady Attend the Polish-American Reception

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

.....The Fake (Corrupt) News Media said they had a leak into polling done by my campaign which, by the way and despite the phony and never ending Witch Hunt, are the best numbers WE have ever had. They reported Fake numbers that they made up & don’t even exist. WE WILL WIN AGAIN!

Despite the Phony Witch Hunt, we will continue to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Thank you!!

Wow! Just got word that our June 18th, Tuesday, ANNOUNCEMENT in Orlando, Florida, already has 74,000 requests for a 20,000 seat Arena. With all of the big events that we have done, this ticket looks to be the “hottest” of them all. See you in Florida!

The Fake News has never been more dishonest than it is today. Thank goodness we can fight back on Social Media. Their new weapon of choice is Fake Polling, sometimes referred to as Suppression Polls (they suppress the numbers). Had it in 2016, but this is worse..... ... .....The Fake (Corrupt) News Media said they had a leak into polling done by my campaign which, by the way and despite the phony and never ending Witch Hunt, are the best numbers WE have ever had. They reported Fake numbers that they made up & don’t even exist. WE WILL WIN AGAIN!

It was a pleasure to host my friends President Andrzej Duda and Mrs. Agata Kornhauser-Duda of Poland at the @WhiteHouse today. U.S.-Poland ties are at an all-time high. Thank you for being such an exemplary Ally!

Michael Whatley has been with us right from the beginning. A great Leader and @NCGOP Chairman!

Thank you!

Our Farmers deserve this, they are GREAT!

Two Fantastic People! My friends from the very beginning. Thank you D&S.

is = if (Spell)! Not like Chris.

Thank you very much!

“Biden would be China’s Dream Candidate, because there would be no more Tariffs, no more demands that China stop stealing our IP, things would go back to the old days with America’s manufacturers & workers getting shafted. He has Zero Credibility!” @IngrahamAngle So true!

“It’s about peace and Prosperity, that’s how Republican Presidents get elected, and this President has delivered on the Economy and he’s delivered on keeping America Stronger & Safer. Our biggest enemy is not any one of these Democrats, it’s the Media.” John McLaughlin, pollster

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

The man who had revealed Pinterest's censorship strategies has been fired - Project Veritas

President Trump waves Mexico border deal at reporters: ‘It goes into effect when I want it to’

Obama White House Deleted Online Speeches About The Immigration Crisis Hours Before Trump Entered Office: Report

BREAKING: After Democrats Unnecessarily Rush to Contempt, President Trump Asserts Executive Privilege Over Census Documents

Michael Flynn hires Sidney Powell as new counsel

The Madlad: Crowder Hate Speech Isn’t Real Q&A

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

Hey guys

Accurate Representation Of The SJW Movement

Bam! Roasted!

I wonder how many others there are like this?

Trump Derangement Syndrome Medical Journal Entry Prototype

Thursday, June 13th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

A Message from Surgeon General Jerome Adams

First Lady Melania Trump Attends 75th Anniversary Ceremony of D-Day

Historic F-35 White House Flyover

President Donald J. Trump Announces Intent to Nominate Personnel to Key Administration Posts

President Trump Delivers Remarks on Second Chance Hiring

President Trump Has a Working Lunch with Governors on Workforce Freedom and Mobility

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

General Michael Flynn, the 33 year war hero who has served with distinction, has not retained a good lawyer, he has retained a GREAT LAWYER, Sidney Powell. Best Wishes and Good Luck to them both!

Unrelated to Russia, Russia, Russia (although the Radical Left doesn’t use the name Russia anymore since the issuance of the Mueller Report), House Committee now plays the seldom used “Contempt” card on our great A.G. & Sec. of Commerce - this time on the Census. Dems play a..... ... .....much tougher game than the Republicans did when they had the House Majority. Republicans will remember! “This has already been argued before the U.S. Supreme Court, but the House doesn’t want to wait. This is a common thread between all of the Committees - do whatever you... ... ....can to embarrass the Trump Administration (and Republicans), attack the Trump Administration. This is campaigning by the Dems.” Attorney David Bruno. So true! In the meantime they are getting NO work done on Drug Pricing, Infrastructure & many other things.

“Congress cannot Impeach President Trump (did nothing wrong) because if they did they would be putting themselves above the law. The Constitution provides criteria for Impeachment - treason, bribery, high crimes & misdemeanors. Unless there is compelling evidence, Impeachment... ... ....is not Constitutionally Permissable.” Alan Dershowitz, Constitutional Lawyer

The Dems fight us at every turn - in the meantime they are accomplishing nothing for the people! They have gone absolutely “Loco,” or Unhinged, as they like to say!

I meet and talk to “foreign governments” every day. I just met with the Queen of England (U.K.), the Prince of Wales, the P.M. of the United Kingdom, the P.M. of Ireland, the President of France and the President of Poland. We talked about “Everything!” Should I immediately.... ... ....call the FBI about these calls and meetings? How ridiculous! I would never be trusted again. With that being said, my full answer is rarely played by the Fake News Media. They purposely leave out the part that matters.

When Senator @MarkWarnerVA spoke at length, and in great detail, about extremely negative information on me, with a talented entertainer purporting to be a Russian Operative, did he immediately call the FBI? NO, in fact he didn’t even tell the Senate Intelligence Committee of.... ... ....which he is a member. When @RepAdamSchiff took calls from another person, also very successfully purporting to be a Russian Operative, did he call the FBI, or even think to call the FBI? NO! The fact is that the phony Witch Hunt is a giant scam where Democrats,... ... ....and other really bad people, SPIED ON MY CAMPAIGN! They even had an “insurance policy” just in case Crooked Hillary Clinton and the Democrats lost their race for the Presidency! This is the biggest & worst political scandal in the history of the United States of America. Sad!

They’ve been wrong all along!

While I very much appreciate P.M. Abe going to Iran to meet with Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, I personally feel that it is too soon to even think about making a deal. They are not ready, and neither are we!

"It is the assessment of the U.S. government that Iran is responsible for today's attacks in the Gulf of Oman...."

After 3 1/2 years, our wonderful Sarah Huckabee Sanders will be leaving the White House at the end of the month and going home to the Great State of Arkansas.... ... ....She is a very special person with extraordinary talents, who has done an incredible job! I hope she decides to run for Governor of Arkansas - she would be fantastic. Sarah, thank you for a job well done!

Today we announced vital new actions that we are taking to help former inmates find a job, live a crime-free life, and succeed beyond their dreams....

Thank you Jason Chaffetz! #MAGA

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

This past week, Steven Crowder and his team have seen 100,000 new subscribers, 12 million channel views, and new Mug Club members showing their support by paying full price instead of using the discount code. Vox tried to destroy Team Crowder. Instead, they made Team Crowder stronger than ever.

I am blessed and forever grateful to @realDonaldTrump for the opportunity to serve and proud of everything he’s accomplished. I love the President and my job. The most important job I’ll ever have is being a mom to my kids and it’s time for us to go home. Thank you Mr. President!

Sarah Sanders tears up as GEOTUS thanks her and gives her an amazing sendoff. "I will continue to be one of the most outspoken and loyal supporters of the President and his agenda"

Project Veritas Features - Pinterest Insider Speaks Out: "The tech companies can't fight us all"

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

This is Eric Cochran. Eric gave up his cushy high paying Pinterest job to blow the whistle on their plans to silence America. Eric is awesome. Be like Eric.

Michael Flynn’s attorney posted this on Twitter. I thought you all might like it, too.

How to solve illegal immigration

White House Chef Andre “Tiny” Rush is a master ice carver, sommelier, pastry chef, chocolatier, and sugar sculptor, among other specialties. He is also a combat veteran who retired as a master sergeant after 23 years in the United States Army.

Friday, June 14th:

TODAY'S ACTION:

Memorandum on Providing an Order of Succession Within the Central Intelligence Agency

Executive Order on Evaluating and Improving the Utility of Federal Advisory Committees

President Trump Speaks on Expanding Health Coverage Options for Small Businesses & Workers

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

Natalie Harp, fighting Stage 2 Cancer and doing really well, was a GREAT guest on @foxandfriends. Right To Try is producing some truly spectacular results. Proud of Natalie!

I will be interviewed on @foxandfriends at 8:00 A.M. Enjoy! @FoxNews

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to our GREAT @USArmy. America loves you! #ArmyBday

The Radical Left Dems are working hard, but THE PEOPLE are much smarter. Working hard, thank you!

Announcing great, expanded HRAs—big win for small employers and workers. This is a fantastic plan! My Administration has worked very hard on creating more affordable health coverage.

Thank you Senator @MarshaBlackburn for fighting obstructionist Democrats led by Cryin' Chuck Schumer. Democrats continue to look for a do-over on the Mueller Report and will stop at nothing to distract the American people from the great accomplishments of this Administration!

Thank you @senatemajldr Mitch McConnell for understanding the Democrats game of not playing it straight on the ridiculous Witch Hunt Hoax in the Senate. Cryin’ Chuck will never stop. Did Senator @MarkWarner ever report speaking to a Russian!?

Just spoke to Marillyn Hewson, CEO of @LockheedMartin, about continuing operations for the @Sikorsky in Coatesville, Pennsylvania. She will be taking it under advisement and will be making a decision soon.... ... ....While Pennsylvania is BOOMING, I don’t want there to be even a little glitch in Coatesville – every job counts. I want Lockhead to BOOM along with it!

The dishonest media will NEVER keep us from accomplishing our objectives on behalf of our GREAT AMERICAN PEOPLE! #MAGA

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

In honor of FLAG DAY: When Palm Beach Wouldn't Allow A 50-foot Flagpole at Mir-a-Lago, Trump Placed a 30-foot Flag Pole on a 20-foot Hill. USA USA USA!!!!

The idea that American embassies would ever even consider flying a pride flag on the same pole as the American flag is just absolutely ridiculous. American embassies represent America, not your sexual orientation.

We all out here celebrating Trump’s birthday in Myrtle Beach, SC

Attendees in the White House Rose Garden sing Happy Birthday to President Trump as he arrives for event on expanding health care options for small businesses.

Trump campaign plans outdoor carnival with food trucks and a party band before he announces re-election bid at Orlando rally

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

Double Standards!

I heard that Gibson family won their lawsuit and was awarded $44 million dollars for being falsely smeared as racists. Here's a picture of Nick Sandmann for no reason at all.

Happy 73rd Birthday to the BEST PRESIDENT EVER!!!!

It's time for President Trump's yearly call to Ben Rhodes... He still won't say it.

Saturday, June 15th:

🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:

“The latest Polls find 51% of Americans approve of President Trump’s Job Performance. Last month a Democrat Pollster said President Trump’s approval rating has been the most steady of any President in history!” @OANN

“With over a 50% Approval Rating at this point in his Presidency, analysts believe re-election in 2020 looks (very) promising!” @OANN Hey, we have accomplished more than any President in the first 2 1/2 years, WHY NOT?

Despite the Greatest Presidential Harassment of all time by people that are very dishonest and want to destroy our Country, we are doing great in the Polls, even better than in 2016, and will be packed at the Tuesday Announcement Rally in Orlando, Florida. KEEP AMERICA GREAT!

All in for Senator Steve Daines as he proposes an Amendment for a strong BAN on burning our American Flag. A no brainer!

“President Trump to launch 2020 Campaign in Florida!” @foxandfriends Tuesday will be a Big Crowd and Big Day!

The Trump Economy is setting records, and has a long way up to go....However, if anyone but me takes over in 2020 (I know the competition very well), there will be a Market Crash the likes of which has not been seen before! KEEP AMERICA GREAT

SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:

Trump Admin Takes First Step to Demand Payback From Sponsors of Immigrants Who Use Welfare

Giving driver's licenses to illegal immigrants will make New York a safer place, says worlds biggest retard.

The Left is trying to steal 2020 with Massive Voter Fraud, this must be stopped: Illegal Alien Population Booms in Red States Ahead of 2020 Election

This is pretty awesome 👏👏👏

🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:

Whoever wrote this had a time machine.

Ah yes

2020 WE'RE FAST APPROACHING MEME WAR ROUND 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO - CALLING ALL 2016 MEME WAR VETERANS AT 0500 FOR TRAINING

Simpler times

WEEEEW LAD!!! SO MUCH WINNING!

Without further ado, some tunes to get you jamming through all this winning:

Country Roads

My Girl

Isn't She Lovely

I Wanna Dance With Somebody

Africa

MAGA ON PATRIOTS!

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HAPPY SATURDAY DEPLORABLES!This is your favorite Saturday afternoon mod here to deliver you TONS of spicy dankness from the past week! If you happened to miss any past recaps you can catch those here!Sunday, June 9th:🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Another false report in the Failing @nytimes. We have been trying to get some of these Border Actions for a long time, as have other administrations, but were not able to get them, or get them in full, until our signed agreement with Mexico. Additionally, and for many years,.... ... .....Mexico was not being cooperative on the Border in things we had, or didn’t have, and now I have full confidence, especially after speaking to their President yesterday, that they will be very cooperative and want to get the job properly done. Importantly, some things..... ... .....not mentioned in yesterday press release, one in particular, were agreed upon. That will be announced at the appropriate time. There is now going to be great cooperation between Mexico & the USA, something that didn’t exist for decades. However, if for some unknown reason... ... .....there is not, we can always go back to our previous, very profitable, position of Tariffs - But I don’t believe that will be necessary. The Failing @nytimes, & ratings challenged @CNN, will do anything possible to see our Country fail! They are truly The Enemy of the People!For two years all the Democrats talked about was the Mueller Report, because they knew that it was loaded up with 13 Angry Democrat Trump Haters, later increased to 18. But despite the bias, when the Report came out, the findings were No Collusion and facts that led to........ ... ....No Obstruction. The Dems were devastated - after all this time and money spent ($40,000,000), the Mueller Report was a disaster for them. But they want a Redo, or Do Over. They are even bringing in @CNN sleazebag attorney John Dean. Sorry, no Do Overs - Go back to work!SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Left-wing racism is realMexican military begins arresting migrants riding 'The Beast' train to US border - More than 200 migrants got off the train and fled," said the director of the Digna Ochoa Human Rights Center - Many "hid in the bush, so only 25 were arrested," - Its better than our Democrats have done so farIf a straight pride parade is absurd, so is a gay pride parade. It is obviously insane to suggest that a person can only be proud of their sexuality if they are gay. Outrage over straight pride is hypocrisy on steroids.🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:How do “they” Ignore the Most Beautiful FLOTUS Ever?Good question... how do they?Still waiting for that apology from Adam SchiffOld school, kick-in-the-ass presidency!Monday, June 10th:TODAY'S ACTION:Memorandum on Presidential Determination Pursuant to Section 303 of the Defense Production Act of 1950, as amendedFirst Lady Melania Trump's Visit to the United KingdomPresident Trump Greets the 103rd Indianapolis 500 Champions: Team Penske🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Now with our new deal, Mexico is doing more for the USA on Illegal Immigration than the Democrats. In fact, the Democrats are doing NOTHING, they want Open Borders, which means Illigal Immigration, Drugs and Crime.We have fully signed and documented another very important part of the Immigration and Security deal with Mexico, one that the U.S. has been asking about getting for many years. It will be revealed in the not too distant future and will need a vote by Mexico’s Legislative body!.. ... ....We do not anticipate a problem with the vote but, if for any reason the approval is not forthcoming, Tariffs will be reinstated!When will the Failing New York Times admit that their front page story on the the new Mexico deal at the Border is a FRAUD and nothing more than a badly reported “hit job” on me, something that has been going on since the first day I announced for the presidency! Sick JournalismVideoVideoThank you @MarkLevinShow and John Eastman!Can’t believe they are bringing in John Dean, the disgraced Nixon White House Counsel who is a paid CNN contributor. No Collusion - No Obstruction! Democrats just want a do-over which they’ll never get!I have been briefed on the helicopter crash in New York City. Phenomenal job by our GREAT First Responders who are currently on the scene. THANK YOU for all you do 24/7/365! The Trump Administration stands ready should you need anything at all.Congratulations to the 2019 Indianapolis 500 Winner @IMS, @SimonPagenaud and @Team_Penske! @IndyCar🏆🏁VideoVideo#AmericaFIRST #MAGA🇺🇸SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Robert Mueller exploited cellphone GPS to track Trump associatesUber Driver threatens passenger: She replied by saying “Tell me you don’t support Trump or I won’t finish this trip.”Jim Acosta is a master of the self-own.Trump: “John Dean’s been a loser for many years” ...as Dean refuses to acknowledge how much money he has been paid by CNN for accusations against the President 🤣🇺🇸🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:To all the pedes down in the trenches, I support you!PSA: If you have a family member with disabilities, please ensure they have one of these devices to assist first respondersIt’s funny because it’s accurateIt Is oN SpEcTruMSorry frens, but you have to go back! True frens respect the rule of law!Tuesday, June 11th:TODAY'S ACTION:President Donald J. Trump Announces Judicial NomineesExecutive Order on Modernizing the Regulatory Framework for Agricultural Biotechnology ProductsPresident Trump Delivers a Statement Upon DeparturePresident Trump Delivers Remarks on Renewable Energy🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:New book just out, “The Real Deal, My Decade Fighting Battles and Winning Wars With Trump,” is really wonderful. It is written by two people who are very smart & know me well, George Sorial & Damian Bates, as opposed to all the books where the author has no clue who I am. ENJOY!“Jerry Nadler’s Trump Bashing Show Is A Bust.” Headline, New York Post. @foxandfriends The Greatest Witch Hunt of all time continues. All crimes were by the other side, but the Committee refuses to even take a look. Deleting 33,000 Emails is the real Obstruction - and much more!“Mueller has spoken. He found No Collusion between the Trump Campaign and the Russians. The bottom line is what the Democrat House is doing is trying to destroy the Trump Presidency (which has been a tremendous success), and I can assure you that we’re done with the Mueller...... ... ....investigation in the Senate. They can talk to John Dean until the cows come home, we’re not doing anything in the Senate regarding the Mueller Report. We are going to harden our Infrastructure against 2020!” @LindseyGrahamSCPRESIDENTIAL HARASSMENT!Sad when you think about it, but Mexico right now is doing more for the United States at the Border than the Democrats in Congress! @foxandfriendsThe United States has VERY LOW INFLATION, a beautiful thing!This is because the Euro and other currencies are devalued against the dollar, putting the U.S. at a big disadvantage. The Fed Interest rate way too high, added to ridiculous quantitative tightening! They don’t have a clue!Maria, Dagan, Steve, Stuart V - When you are the big “piggy bank” that other countries have been ripping off for years (to a level that is not to be believed), Tariffs are a great negotiating tool, a great revenue producers and, most importantly, a powerful way to get...... ... ...Companies to come to the U.S.A and to get companies that have left us for other lands to come back home. We stupidly lost 30% of our auto business to Mexico. If the Tariffs went on at the higher level, they would all come back, and pass. But very happy with the deal I made,... ... ....If Mexico produces (which I think they will). Biggest part of deal with Mexico has not yet been revealed! China is similar, except they devalue currency and subsidize companies to lessen effect of 25% Tariff. So far, little effect to consumer. Companies will relocate to U.S.Good day in the Stock Market. People have no idea the tremendous potential our Country has for GROWTH - and many other things!“Why did the Democrats run if they didn’t want to do things?” @SenRickScottOn my way to Iowa - just heard nearly 1,000 agriculture groups signed a letter urging Congress to approve the USMCA. Our Patriot Farmers & rural America have spoken! Now Congress must do its job & support these great men and women by passing the bipartisan USMCA Trade Agreement!Today, here in Iowa, we honor America’s cherished farming heritage. We salute your commitment to American Energy Independence — and we celebrate the bright future we are forging together powered by clean, affordable AMERICAN ETHANOL!“Trump administration gives final approval for year-round E15 use”Beautiful afternoon in Iowa. Thank you to all of our Nation’s Farmers. May God bless you, and may God Bless America!“Someone should call Obama up. The Obama Administration spied on a rival presidential campaign using Federal Agencies. I mean, that seems like a headline to me?” @TuckerCarlson It will all start coming out, and the Witch Hunt will end. Presidential Harassment!SIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:The mad lad is at the Google campus in Austin, Texas](http://bit.ly/2IKRcuo just cracked 750k PEDES!Nearly 1,700 Pedos Arrested Nationwide in 2 Months During DOJ Sting OP (6/11/2019)NEW PROJECT VERITAS: Tech Insider Blows Whistle on How Pinterest Listed Top Pro-Life Site as Porn, "Bible Verses" Censored🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:This is why I love living in Texas.❄️ Liberals Hate Glaciers Now ❄️Or tariffs per trade deal made.TFW you're banned from all of social media but other patriots are doing God's work spreading your messageWednesday, June 12th:TODAY'S ACTION:Six Nominations and Two Withdrawals Sent to the SenatePresident Trump Participates in a 2:2 Bilateral Meeting with the President of PolandPresident Trump Participates in a Joint Press Conference with the President of PolandPresident Trump Remarks on the Opioid CrisisPresident Trump Participates in a Joint Signing Ceremony with the President of PolandPresident Trump and the First Lady Attend the Polish-American Reception🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:.....The Fake (Corrupt) News Media said they had a leak into polling done by my campaign which, by the way and despite the phony and never ending Witch Hunt, are the best numbers WE have ever had. They reported Fake numbers that they made up & don’t even exist. WE WILL WIN AGAIN!Despite the Phony Witch Hunt, we will continue to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Thank you!!Wow! Just got word that our June 18th, Tuesday, ANNOUNCEMENT in Orlando, Florida, already has 74,000 requests for a 20,000 seat Arena. With all of the big events that we have done, this ticket looks to be the “hottest” of them all. See you in Florida!The Fake News has never been more dishonest than it is today. Thank goodness we can fight back on Social Media. Their new weapon of choice is Fake Polling, sometimes referred to as Suppression Polls (they suppress the numbers). Had it in 2016, but this is worse..... ... .....The Fake (Corrupt) News Media said they had a leak into polling done by my campaign which, by the way and despite the phony and never ending Witch Hunt, are the best numbers WE have ever had. They reported Fake numbers that they made up & don’t even exist. WE WILL WIN AGAIN!It was a pleasure to host my friends President Andrzej Duda and Mrs. Agata Kornhauser-Duda of Poland at the @WhiteHouse today. U.S.-Poland ties are at an all-time high. Thank you for being such an exemplary Ally!Michael Whatley has been with us right from the beginning. A great Leader and @NCGOP Chairman!Thank you!Our Farmers deserve this, they are GREAT!Two Fantastic People! My friends from the very beginning. Thank you D&S.is = if (Spell)! Not like Chris.Thank you very much!“Biden would be China’s Dream Candidate, because there would be no more Tariffs, no more demands that China stop stealing our IP, things would go back to the old days with America’s manufacturers & workers getting shafted. He has Zero Credibility!” @IngrahamAngle So true!“It’s about peace and Prosperity, that’s how Republican Presidents get elected, and this President has delivered on the Economy and he’s delivered on keeping America Stronger & Safer. Our biggest enemy is not any one of these Democrats, it’s the Media.” John McLaughlin, pollsterSIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:The man who had revealed Pinterest's censorship strategies has been fired - Project VeritasPresident Trump waves Mexico border deal at reporters: ‘It goes into effect when I want it to’Obama White House Deleted Online Speeches About The Immigration Crisis Hours Before Trump Entered Office: ReportBREAKING: After Democrats Unnecessarily Rush to Contempt, President Trump Asserts Executive Privilege Over Census DocumentsMichael Flynn hires Sidney Powell as new counselThe Madlad: Crowder Hate Speech Isn’t Real Q&A🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Hey guysAccurate Representation Of The SJW MovementBam! Roasted!I wonder how many others there are like this?Trump Derangement Syndrome Medical Journal Entry PrototypeThursday, June 13th:TODAY'S ACTION:A Message from Surgeon General Jerome AdamsFirst Lady Melania Trump Attends 75th Anniversary Ceremony of D-DayHistoric F-35 White House FlyoverPresident Donald J. Trump Announces Intent to Nominate Personnel to Key Administration PostsPresident Trump Delivers Remarks on Second Chance HiringPresident Trump Has a Working Lunch with Governors on Workforce Freedom and Mobility🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:General Michael Flynn, the 33 year war hero who has served with distinction, has not retained a good lawyer, he has retained a GREAT LAWYER, Sidney Powell. Best Wishes and Good Luck to them both!Unrelated to Russia, Russia, Russia (although the Radical Left doesn’t use the name Russia anymore since the issuance of the Mueller Report), House Committee now plays the seldom used “Contempt” card on our great A.G. & Sec. of Commerce - this time on the Census. Dems play a..... ... .....much tougher game than the Republicans did when they had the House Majority. Republicans will remember! “This has already been argued before the U.S. Supreme Court, but the House doesn’t want to wait. This is a common thread between all of the Committees - do whatever you... ... ....can to embarrass the Trump Administration (and Republicans), attack the Trump Administration. This is campaigning by the Dems.” Attorney David Bruno. So true! In the meantime they are getting NO work done on Drug Pricing, Infrastructure & many other things.“Congress cannot Impeach President Trump (did nothing wrong) because if they did they would be putting themselves above the law. The Constitution provides criteria for Impeachment - treason, bribery, high crimes & misdemeanors. Unless there is compelling evidence, Impeachment... ... ....is not Constitutionally Permissable.” Alan Dershowitz, Constitutional LawyerThe Dems fight us at every turn - in the meantime they are accomplishing nothing for the people! They have gone absolutely “Loco,” or Unhinged, as they like to say!I meet and talk to “foreign governments” every day. I just met with the Queen of England (U.K.), the Prince of Wales, the P.M. of the United Kingdom, the P.M. of Ireland, the President of France and the President of Poland. We talked about “Everything!” Should I immediately.... ... ....call the FBI about these calls and meetings? How ridiculous! I would never be trusted again. With that being said, my full answer is rarely played by the Fake News Media. They purposely leave out the part that matters.When Senator @MarkWarnerVA spoke at length, and in great detail, about extremely negative information on me, with a talented entertainer purporting to be a Russian Operative, did he immediately call the FBI? NO, in fact he didn’t even tell the Senate Intelligence Committee of.... ... ....which he is a member. When @RepAdamSchiff took calls from another person, also very successfully purporting to be a Russian Operative, did he call the FBI, or even think to call the FBI? NO! The fact is that the phony Witch Hunt is a giant scam where Democrats,... ... ....and other really bad people, SPIED ON MY CAMPAIGN! They even had an “insurance policy” just in case Crooked Hillary Clinton and the Democrats lost their race for the Presidency! This is the biggest & worst political scandal in the history of the United States of America. Sad!They’ve been wrong all along!While I very much appreciate P.M. Abe going to Iran to meet with Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, I personally feel that it is too soon to even think about making a deal. They are not ready, and neither are we!"It is the assessment of the U.S. government that Iran is responsible for today's attacks in the Gulf of Oman...."After 3 1/2 years, our wonderful Sarah Huckabee Sanders will be leaving the White House at the end of the month and going home to the Great State of Arkansas.... ... ....She is a very special person with extraordinary talents, who has done an incredible job! I hope she decides to run for Governor of Arkansas - she would be fantastic. Sarah, thank you for a job well done!Today we announced vital new actions that we are taking to help former inmates find a job, live a crime-free life, and succeed beyond their dreams....Thank you Jason Chaffetz! #MAGASIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:This past week, Steven Crowder and his team have seen 100,000 new subscribers, 12 million channel views, and new Mug Club members showing their support by paying full price instead of using the discount code. Vox tried to destroy Team Crowder. Instead, they made Team Crowder stronger than ever.I am blessed and forever grateful to @realDonaldTrump for the opportunity to serve and proud of everything he’s accomplished. I love the President and my job. The most important job I’ll ever have is being a mom to my kids and it’s time for us to go home. Thank you Mr. President!Sarah Sanders tears up as GEOTUS thanks her and gives her an amazing sendoff. "I will continue to be one of the most outspoken and loyal supporters of the President and his agenda"Project Veritas Features - Pinterest Insider Speaks Out: "The tech companies can't fight us all"🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:This is Eric Cochran. Eric gave up his cushy high paying Pinterest job to blow the whistle on their plans to silence America. Eric is awesome. Be like Eric.Michael Flynn’s attorney posted this on Twitter. I thought you all might like it, too.How to solve illegal immigrationWhite House Chef Andre “Tiny” Rush is a master ice carver, sommelier, pastry chef, chocolatier, and sugar sculptor, among other specialties. He is also a combat veteran who retired as a master sergeant after 23 years in the United States Army.Friday, June 14th:TODAY'S ACTION:Memorandum on Providing an Order of Succession Within the Central Intelligence AgencyExecutive Order on Evaluating and Improving the Utility of Federal Advisory CommitteesPresident Trump Speaks on Expanding Health Coverage Options for Small Businesses & Workers🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:Natalie Harp, fighting Stage 2 Cancer and doing really well, was a GREAT guest on @foxandfriends. Right To Try is producing some truly spectacular results. Proud of Natalie!I will be interviewed on @foxandfriends at 8:00 A.M. Enjoy! @FoxNewsHAPPY BIRTHDAY to our GREAT @USArmy. America loves you! #ArmyBdayThe Radical Left Dems are working hard, but THE PEOPLE are much smarter. Working hard, thank you!Announcing great, expanded HRAs—big win for small employers and workers. This is a fantastic plan! My Administration has worked very hard on creating more affordable health coverage.Thank you Senator @MarshaBlackburn for fighting obstructionist Democrats led by Cryin' Chuck Schumer. Democrats continue to look for a do-over on the Mueller Report and will stop at nothing to distract the American people from the great accomplishments of this Administration!Thank you @senatemajldr Mitch McConnell for understanding the Democrats game of not playing it straight on the ridiculous Witch Hunt Hoax in the Senate. Cryin’ Chuck will never stop. Did Senator @MarkWarner ever report speaking to a Russian!?Just spoke to Marillyn Hewson, CEO of @LockheedMartin, about continuing operations for the @Sikorsky in Coatesville, Pennsylvania. She will be taking it under advisement and will be making a decision soon.... ... ....While Pennsylvania is BOOMING, I don’t want there to be even a little glitch in Coatesville – every job counts. I want Lockhead to BOOM along with it!The dishonest media will NEVER keep us from accomplishing our objectives on behalf of our GREAT AMERICAN PEOPLE! #MAGASIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:In honor of FLAG DAY: When Palm Beach Wouldn't Allow A 50-foot Flagpole at Mir-a-Lago, Trump Placed a 30-foot Flag Pole on a 20-foot Hill. USA USA USA!!!!The idea that American embassies would ever even consider flying a pride flag on the same pole as the American flag is just absolutely ridiculous. American embassies represent America, not your sexual orientation.We all out here celebrating Trump’s birthday in Myrtle Beach, SCAttendees in the White House Rose Garden sing Happy Birthday to President Trump as he arrives for event on expanding health care options for small businesses.Trump campaign plans outdoor carnival with food trucks and a party band before he announces re-election bid at Orlando rally🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Double Standards!I heard that Gibson family won their lawsuit and was awarded $44 million dollars for being falsely smeared as racists. Here's a picture of Nick Sandmann for no reason at all.Happy 73rd Birthday to the BEST PRESIDENT EVER!!!!It's time for President Trump's yearly call to Ben Rhodes... He still won't say it.Saturday, June 15th:🔥🔥TRUMP TWEETS🔥🔥:“The latest Polls find 51% of Americans approve of President Trump’s Job Performance. Last month a Democrat Pollster said President Trump’s approval rating has been the most steady of any President in history!” @OANN“With over a 50% Approval Rating at this point in his Presidency, analysts believe re-election in 2020 looks (very) promising!” @OANN Hey, we have accomplished more than any President in the first 2 1/2 years, WHY NOT?Despite the Greatest Presidential Harassment of all time by people that are very dishonest and want to destroy our Country, we are doing great in the Polls, even better than in 2016, and will be packed at the Tuesday Announcement Rally in Orlando, Florida. KEEP AMERICA GREAT!All in for Senator Steve Daines as he proposes an Amendment for a strong BAN on burning our American Flag. A no brainer!“President Trump to launch 2020 Campaign in Florida!” @foxandfriends Tuesday will be a Big Crowd and Big Day!The Trump Economy is setting records, and has a long way up to go....However, if anyone but me takes over in 2020 (I know the competition very well), there will be a Market Crash the likes of which has not been seen before! KEEP AMERICA GREATSIGNIFICANT TWEETS AND NEWS:Trump Admin Takes First Step to Demand Payback From Sponsors of Immigrants Who Use WelfareGiving driver's licenses to illegal immigrants will make New York a safer place, says worlds biggest retard.The Left is trying to steal 2020 with Massive Voter Fraud, this must be stopped: Illegal Alien Population Booms in Red States Ahead of 2020 ElectionThis is pretty awesome 👏👏👏🐸 TOP SPICE OF THE DAY 🐸:Whoever wrote this had a time machine.Ah yes2020 WE'RE FAST APPROACHING MEME WAR ROUND 2, ELECTRIC BOOGALOO - CALLING ALL 2016 MEME WAR VETERANS AT 0500 FOR TRAININGSimpler timesWEEEEW LAD!!! SO MUCH WINNING!Without further ado, some tunes to get you jamming through all this winning:Country RoadsMy GirlIsn't She LovelyI Wanna Dance With SomebodyAfricaMAGA ON PATRIOTS! #robgray

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SEVENTEEN AND HIGH, Nikki Darling swaggers down the middle of Garvey Boulevard, a busy thoroughfare in the San Gabriel Valley, as cars swerve around her: “‘Three Days’ by Jane’s Addiction is playing on my Walkman and I feel like I’m in a movie, like I’m an assassin.” She stands in the street with a cigarette hanging from her lips, with “someplace to be or maybe nowhere to go.” She taunts the cars as they pass: “Fly around me, motherfuckers! Fly around me like I’m not even here!”

In an opening scene brazen with feminine adolescent rage and emotion, Nikki Darling the author dares readers of her debut novel, Fade Into You, to come in close. By writing in the New Narrative style popularized by Eileen Myles (Chelsea Girls) and Michelle Tea (Rose of No Man’s Land), Darling keeps the veil between fiction and nonfiction purposefully thin, and having her protagonist carry her name builds intimacy. In an interview with the popular feminist podcast Call Your Girlfriend, Darling said she named her character Nikki because “being in the interiority of a teenage girl is not something readers are always familiar with.” In Fade Into You, Darling gives us more than an intimate view of a teenage girl; she gives us an intimate view of a young, mixed-race Chicana living in the suburbs of Los Angeles, the kind of portrait that is nearly nonexistent in L.A. letters.

Luis J. Rodriguez’s Always Running: La Vida Loca: Gang Days in L.A., an award-winning 1993 memoir that shares the tale of a young man struggling to survive gang life and addiction in the 1980s San Gabriel Valley, is the most notable and celebrated literary depiction of Chicanx teen life in Los Angeles. But not every Chicanx can identify with living “la vida loca.” Darling’s protagonist struggles to find her identity in a city that says to be Mexican can only be one thing, an issue many Mexican-American/Chicanx Angelenos understand. As Nikki thinks,

It would be my luck not just to be half-Mexican, but the wrong kind of Mexican. I am not from East Los. My people are borderlands, the frontera. I am a pale ghost of a bloody past. A daughter of the viceroyalty. A lady of Spain. But I’m not that either. I’m me. I’m SGV. I watch from the schoolyard as the sad boys mark up the EMF, throw down the emero. I live in the cool shadows of libraries.

I grew up in the SGV in the ’90s, and when I was 17 I liked to wear loose-fitting, faded blue jeans with a white T-shirt and blue Chucks. It’s how I felt most beautiful. One afternoon as I was sitting on the front stoop of my grandparents’ Boyle Heights home, my party-crew cousin from La Puente, in stiff Dickies and dark hoodie, looked down his chin at me and asked, “Eh, you like a rocker? You a skater? What are you?”

“I don’t know,” I said. I read his questions to mean, Why aren’t you more Mexican?

On a different day, a friend from my hometown of San Gabriel came with my family and me to that same Boyle Heights home for Sunday menudo. When my father parked in the driveway and I slid open the door to our Dodge van, she refused to get out. “I’m going to be shot!” she screamed, tears running down her face.

Her shocked reaction meant, I didn’t know you were that kind of Mexican.

By the late ’90s, I had not yet seen in books or TV these disparate expectations of what it meant to look and act Mexican. But I had seen them in two movies: My Family (1995) and Selena (1997). The latter, written and directed by Gregory Nava, put into words how I often felt, a dilemma perfectly articulated by Selena’s father, played by Edward James Olmos, as he rants to his family about the possibility of Selena touring in Mexico:

We gotta prove to the Mexicans how Mexican we are. And we gotta prove to the Americans how American we are. We gotta be more Mexican than the Mexicans and more American than the Americans both at the same time. It’s exhausting! Man! Nobody knows how tough it is to be a Mexican-American.

But Selena grew up in Corpus Christi, Texas, a vastly different setting from Fade Into You’s San Gabriel Valley, California, which in Darling’s hands becomes its own character. Schools, streets, and favorite hangouts of this L.A. suburb east of downtown are namedropped with acute knowledge, and the dialogue between Nikki and her friends — with all its dudes, mans, and bitches — is so accurate to the time and place it sounds more like transcription than fiction.

As I read, I was in awe of how much I had in common with Nikki. I, too, had a gorgeous, gay best friend I was in love with. I, too, studied theater. I, too, got high and went for pancakes at Denny’s before driving up to the mountains because they were close and we could. But as I moved further into the novel, I noticed another layer of the Mexican-American experience that is specific to the suburbs. Nikki narrates,

We are the kids of LA.

They write books about us. They make after-school specials about us. And none of it is the real us. None of it really captures who we are. But we eat it, digest it, and let it redefine us until we no longer know what is real and what is fake.

Nikki inhabits the parts of the SGV where teen movies and TV series such as Pretty in Pink and My So-Called Life are filmed, but these stories never center people like her. When she says, “They write after-school specials about us,” the us is never really us. The best we could hope for was to be the quiet and queer best friend, the Rickie Vasquez to the story’s Angela Chase. Hollywood used our streets but not our faces, and this became a kind of trauma.

I attended a private school in Pasadena not far from Casa Walsh and Dylan’s surfer bungalow (RIP Luke Perry), and my friends and I behaved as if we were characters on Beverly Hills, 90210 even though we were in 91107 and a good 25 miles from the über-rich neighborhood. Like Nikki attending a party at a midcentury home at the edge of South Pasadena, nearly everything we did felt cinematic: “Chelo and I walk into the party and I can tell things are about to get real cinema tonight. It’s a night when this city we live in really shows itself.”

To keep the fantasy alive, many classmates bleached their hair, and when people started driving, a good number opted for convertibles without concern for the make or model. But our proximity to Hollywood teen life affected more than our outward appearance — at least for me, it corrupted my very sense of self. I remember one day bounding into my house after being dropped off by a friend in her white convertible and catching my reflection in the large mirror that hung across from the front door. I didn’t recognize the person I saw. The image of my own brown face shocked me, and for a moment I was invisible.

Latinx people make up nearly 50 percent of the population of Los Angeles, with the majority being Mexican or of Mexican descent. And yet even though most films and TV shows are made here, I can count on two hands the number that center Mexican-American stories. In the afterglow of the 2019 Oscars, Los Angeles Times features writer and taco historian Gustavo Arellano tweeted, “Still waiting for Hollywood to give love to Chicanos.” Sure, over the last six years a Mexican director has won Best Director five times, but these are Mexican nationals, which is a very different experience. What of the immigrant families, children of immigrants, and multigenerational Mexican Americans who live in this town and help make it work?

The literary world maintains a similar sparsity. As a senior in high school in 1998, I read The House on Mango Street by Sandra Cisneros in my English class. Though it is set in Chicago, I saw a young, Mexican-American character in literature for the first time, and the book thrilled me. In my 20s, I obsessed over Michele Serros’s Chicana Falsa: And Other Stories of Death, Identity, and Oxnard (1993), and in my 30s I fell in love with Isabel Quintero’s Gabi, a Girl in Pieces (2014), which follows a 17-year-old, light-skinned Chicana who lives in the Inland Empire and loves poetry and hot Cheetos. Author Helena María Viramontes (Under the Feet of Jesus) also tells stories about young people living in East Los Angeles, but a nuanced view of growing up Chicana in the L.A. suburbs has been missing until now.

We SGV kids live close enough to Hollywood to be infected by its story lines and cultural sprawl, and yet only our streets are worthy of making it onto film. We live close enough to East Los Angeles to know we aren’t the right kind of Mexican, and yet we’re at the same time too Mexican. We are pushed into the margins of pop culture. So while Nikki Darling the character is walking down the middle of Garvey Boulevard dying to be seen, it’s Nikki Darling the author who’s shouting: We’re here! We matter! We live on these streets! And that’s a reflection I recognize.

Women Who Submit co-founder Xochitl-Julisa Bermejo’s work has appeared on Terrain.org and in KCET Departures. She is the author of Posada: Offerings of Witness and Refuge (Sundress Publications, 2016).

The post Invisible No More: How “Fade Into You” Reflects the L.A. Chicanx Experience appeared first on Los Angeles Review of Books.

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