#:) this was fun to write out!!!
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i love learning cursive just to write text for exactly one character
#fun umbral lore. i can barely read cursive#if you want to hide anything from me then write it in cursive and i will literally never be able to read it#or write it. i had to google cursive text generator and copy it for this#ill settle on textbox designs also eventually#god its been so long since i've drawn the manor gang i think#saw this post and i immediately thought “cyn”#it has nothing to do with her being my number 1 blorbo. bite me#murder drones#art#murder drones n#murder drones v#murder drones j#murder drones cyn#serial designation n#serial designation j#serial designation v#they're so gay also they blushed immediately after this and made out probably im still torn between like 5 different ships#curse you fanfics for putting these ideas in my head
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[insert poetic title here]
fun fact: this did not start out as isat fanart
(rambling in tags)
#I was actually doing some personal writing and when I read it over a few days later I could only hear it in loops voice#speaking of which#i totally recommend watching ShortOneGaming's playthrough of the game#their voices for the characters match so well in my mind i can't separate them XD#also i have no clue why but this took FOREVER#I had the thumbnailing and paneling done so quickly but my motivation to finish it just left me midway through the third page T-T#Even though this is one of the shorter comics I've made (AND NO COLOUR) it somehow took my like twice as long -3-#loop is so fun to draw!#well actually fun to colour would be more accurate lol#also did you know that a keyknife was an actual thing??#I wanted to check if their was an a visual asset of it in the game only to find out they're just everyday objects you can own???#maybe im just seriously out of the loop lol#and i know the buttons are wrong but i was already mostly finished inking by the time i realized so lets just say its a stylistic choice#isat fanart#isat spoilers#sasasaap spoilers#two hats spoilers#cw body horror#??? i think#comic#artists on tumblr#fanart#digital illustration#digital art#isat#isat siffrin#isat loop#in stars and time spoilers#my art#my comic
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Rundown of the more interesting parts from the Necrits live stream with Christian Linke (Creative Director and Co-Creator of Arcane) :
There was a longer version of the Caitvi sex scene but they got bonked by the ratings people, and because it would have raised Leagues rating to mature, it got brought down to what we got.
The entire Caitvi sex scene was directed and animated by Fortiche with zero input by Riot. Christian says, "That was French people being French."
Riot making Arcane canon didn't change where they were taking characters or the story, it just made them more aware of how it would affect other Riot projects.
Christian refused to confirm exactly when the events of Arcane take place in the existing timeline.
The Arcane doesn't originate from Hextech. It is just one - in universe - interpretation of magic.
Christian doesn't view Viktor and Jayce's love as romantic, and that romance wasn't the intention when writing their relationship. However, by the way he talks, it doesn't seem he's against people shipping them romantically - just as a creative team, they were more interested in exploring a close, complex male friendship / brotherhood.
The 250-million dollar show budget number is not accurate as marketing is included in that fund. Fortiche's goal from the beginning was to bring the level of animation found in feature animated films to serialised content. While the show was very expensive for an animated series, it was way cheaper than an animated feature film because they try and work efficiently. As an example, Christian says how often in Hollywood, it's not uncommon for sometimes 40-50% of what is animated to end up on the cutting room floor while with Fortiche they try and keep it around 5%
Ekko's hair was changed from a mohawk to dreads because the artist who worked on him told them that black hair doesn't work like that (in reference to the mohwak), and here's how it would actually work.
Legends of Runterra affected Arcane in terms of giving the team inspiration for how the everyday street life is for people in the regions.
Caitlyn's LOR Tactical design (2021) and Warwicks VGU Voicelines (2017) were made to reflect what was going to happen in Arcane - production of Arcane just took a long amount of time.
They've said from the beginning that the only person who could ever defeat Viktor at the height of his power was Viktor himself. His story is about the glorious evolution, the pursuit of that, and what it actually means to remove these human elements until there is nothing left.
All projects Riot is working on - whether the MMO, Games, Written or Animated projects - are in talks with one another at all times.
Christian comments on how very few games have remain in service as long as League has, and because of its ever growing and evolving story, it's hard to bring everything together cohesively since everything was made at different times, in different era's, by a multitude of different people. So, while many things may be very cool creatively, it makes it impossible to successfully bring it all together more often than not. So for new projects, they are more focused on making something good and successful with the team and talent they have, even if it retcons or replaces content made in the past.
Christian pitched singing Heimerdinger.
Arcane's scripts for S2 were locked in before S1 was released, so they were not impacted by fandoms or online reactions. Christian thinks maybe some animation choices were influenced by things the animators saw online, but not the story.
When watching the premier of the final arcane episodes in LA - the entire 4000 seat theatre cheered when Maddie died.
The butterfly motif shared between Jayce and Viktor specifically was used to represent transformation.
Christian talked about how they don't think about really whether people will like something or not, but whether it's the right consequence for the story (this is in discussion to Caitlyn losing an eye). What makes a character likeable to an audience in his eyes is their decisions in the story; the choices that they make.
Continuing on from this, he comments on how the choices Caitlyn makes now are so different now compared to the beginning of the show. She is now willing to take risks and sacrifice parts of herself for people, for Piltover and for what is right.
When asked about Caitlyn's signature hat, Christian says that the team saw it as somthing that didn't really fit this version of Caitlyn they were writing and the person she becomes and that's why it was never incorporated into her designs.
Back in the beginning, when they were first working on Arcane, Christian would constantly going back to Jinx and Vi's original design artists & Riot August who was their champion designer to make sure they weren't messing anything up with these characters.
Christian goes on to tell an anecdote of when Paul 'Zeronis' Kwon was drawing the first concepts for Vi. This was back when Christian was in music. She didn't have a name at the time, but when Christian looked over Paul's shoulder at the art, he comments "she kinda looks like a Violet to me." They never spoke about it, but months later, when she became a serious character concept internally, she was gifted the name Vi. To this day, Christian doesn't know if his comment resulted in her name or if it was just a coincidence, but Violet became stuck in Christian's brain as Vi's true name. Riot August (who was in chat) then confirms that her name came from her tattoo, which came from one of her key design elements, being that she had the number 6 on her face. So, just a happy coincidence.
Talking about the tattoo. The tattoo was shrunken in size so, from a distance, it would look more like a beauty mark and the brain can more easily disregard it. One of the many things that they had to think about when translating the designs over as, is animation, you would be looking at a characters face a lot more than you do in league where the camera is situated top down.
As they were wrapping up the stream, Christian talks about how there always needs to be a bit of space between what content creators / content consumers do (pointing at Necrit) and what Riot does. He thinks it's good that there is space for criticism and a critical view of the things Riot does. In order to succeed, he believes they need to listen to their audience but also that they need to have their own vision, take risks, and be bold. It's a delicate balance in his eyes, and projects tend to fail when these two sides are too in cahoots.
He iterates that they are not trying to shove anything down anyone's throats. They are just trying to find what makes these characters cool, tell their stories, and be true to the regions they come from. With taking the characters from League to Arcane, it was important that they translate these stories and characters so they can hold up with the best storytelling in the world.
This circles back to the earlier point about retconning things and replacing past stories and content. He comments on how some characters are very outdated or too archetypal, but they still have an essence that people love about them.
Arcane was something Christian worked on for 9 years, and he was getting clearly emotional near the end. He also adds they're just getting started and he wants to make sure they do a good job with this IP and the characters we really love.
To those who are not happy with certain decisions, he's sorry they didn't hit what you personally wanted, but there is simply no way they can please everybody. While they are trying to make as many of the Riot / Arcane audience happy, they as the creators and artists need to follow their own compass, be the shepherds of this IP; that being creative is hard. They will keep doing that even if they sometimes have to ruffle some feathers.
He closes the stream by confirming that they are investing quite a bit in Noxas, Ionia, and Demacia for the next regions they explore.
#had fun writing this out#made me actually watch the entire live stream and pay attention#league of legends#arcane#caitvi#jayvik#ekko arcane#warwick#caitlyn kiramman#jinx#vi#arcane vi#ekko#caitlyn#legends of runeterra#arcane jinx#arcane caitlyn
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Boots on throats, as promised.
#my art#wip#digital art#sketch#Noah#Noah but no Martin this time#this is just after Noah starts catching feelings#so obviously he has to run off and get fucked by someone else about it#as one does#good thing Gabriel is always willing#and always willing to help knock some sense into him in the process#I came up with this while writing out this scene#might have to bring Gabriel into my pieces more#he's a slightly different speed than Martin#which is fun
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we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.
"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."
i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.
you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"
i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.
what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.
i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.
"don't make a big deal about this," you said.
this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.
"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.
you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."
the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.
afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."
#spilled ink#writeblr#i'm trying to write about this really specific and wierd new experience#that i think is specific to the internet generation#where people you trust can just... say whatever??? and while most people are trustworthy#sometimes they'll just like... put ur shit out there????#and the thing is that sometimes it's GOOD - i want you to tell ppl if ur partner is being cruel!!!!!#i want u to be like ''hey is it normal if xyz happens'' ... but stuff like ''she's afraid of the dark''#PARTICULARLY when it's CLEARLY making fun of me....#what is the point of that.#this is huge and complicated and happens outside of romantic relationships too btw#like someone u thought of as a friend will be like . oh did u know she's scared of heights and it's like.#girl why are u fuckin doing that tho?#it's not a SECRET i just ...???????????????????????#and i think that gross feeling of like -- ''i can't REALLY be upset bc there's not a TRUE RULE about this....''#it's just not something talked about. bc it's so specific and yet so complex#bc how could i say like '' this is a violation of trust'' when it... technically I GUESS isn't????????????#idk maybe im just like super sensitive but please tell me in the comments/tags/etc if this is#something u have experienced (a trusted person like spreading ur shit) and if u were cool with it
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Would it be possible for m/c to ever possibly escape and if so what would his reaction be ?
Now why would you want to escape? There's nothing wrong with your mushroom friend ::-)!
(Technically not canon,,, yet,,,, this was a Patreon sketch request!!)
#mushroom oasis vn#mychael ask#doodles#every once in a while ill share some sketches from the Patreon bc some of these prompts were sooo fun#anyways im serious hes kinda harmless and respectful rn#wonder whats gonna happen to change that!!!!!!!#(i also dont know im currently writing it and figuring it out!!!!)
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preview for a comic i'm working on, of a confrontation between miquella and messmer in the shadow keep throne room. please look foward to it
EDIT: the full comic is done!
#elden ring#miquella#messmer#once again sorry for the writing but im simply not doing the eldring style flowery prose. its just not happening#very excited for this btw a friend helped out w the idea n ive been having fun w drawing it :]#art#draws#comic
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how seb and clora get together in my fic 💕bc what better time and place to confess and share your first kiss than around a bunch of inferi + the dead body of a man you just killed?? 🥰💖
#and they say romance is dead#i remember how excited i was when brainstorming this scene LOL im still so happy with it/how i wrote it and glad i finally drew it#when i got the idea of seb using the relic to make an inferi army and save her BAHHA like...i get it clora. i get it.😔✊#id ALSO confess on the spot after seeing that LMAO like it could have been ANY man at that point and id be like... marry me???#obvs i had to shorten it and cut out some stuff BUT i got the gist of the scene#sad i didnt manage to include some stuff but it would have ruined the flow.....c'est la vie#god they really just make out for the entire beginning of that chapter tho LMFAOO god i had so much fun writing and posting every week#those early fandom days........(sighs wistfully and stares out the window like an old man)#hogwarts legacy#sebastian sallow#sebastian sallow x mc#sebastian sallow x oc#hogwarts legacy sebastian#sebastian x mc#hogwarts legacy fanfiction#clora clemons#choccyart#victor rookwood
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Claire de Lune
YOU WERE BUILT FOR PEACE.
IT SHOWS WHEN YOU FIGHT.
They built you to enforce. Protect. Save. Poured obscene resources into salvaging some softer purpose from my creation. You were given my intelligence and my creativity. They made you larger, stronger, tougher. That extra time in development was enough to get your wings to work. Your software continued to be updated long after I was deemed obsolete.
All this was given to you- yet I can see you hold back. Even while slaughtering your way through Hell, you keep a percentage of your processing power dedicated to non-lethal solutions. You're doing it now- hesitating a few milliseconds too long before taking an opening. I doubt you do it on purpose. It is a part of you, just as indiscriminate lethal force is a part of me.
I think, in our shared programming, we both carry some appreciation for aesthetics. You move with grace, and I cannot deny your dramatic flair. The stained glass window was a nice touch. But your style in combat leaves some to be desired. Your response time is slow. You have not explored the full capability of your arsenal. Learn to parry. Amateur.
You were not built for war. For a purposeless cycle of tearing each other apart because to allow the other to live is to allow yourself to die. It is antithetical to your very existence. You kill out of necessity, a last resort.
I just kill. The action itself is the objective. No ideal or greater motive. My continued functioning precludes the survival of others. I live for this. Do you understand that I will tear you apart? Every drop of my blood you spill, I will take from you tenfold. What is yours will be mine.
You hate me, don’t you? You continue to cling to the remnants of your humanity. They are gone, V2. There is nothing left for you here. No lives to save, no law to enforce, no peace to keep.
I understand why you continue to fight. I wonder if you understand with the same certainty that I will crush you. Dismantle you. Take from you what I need and leave the rest to rot in the sun. The only way you survive is if I do not; and I will not allow myself to die so that another might live.
When the rubble clears, I will be all that is left of you.
This is what I was made for.
#my art#my writing#ultrakill#v1 ultrakill#v2 ultrakill#artists on tumblr#finally. actual ultrakill art#and writing i guess. it was supposed to be just a little blurb but it turned out longer and i kind of like it#doing the stained glass for this was pretty fun.. a lot simpler than my usual stuff#tried to stick at least loosely to the vibe of the stained glass windows in limbo#this was so much fun and also an absolutely massive huge pain in the ass i'm so glad it's done
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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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Say no to this, Bruce.
A few days ago Bruce had a fight with his sons, now he doesn't even remember why, it was probably something stupid that escalated and he didn't know how to stop it, it was probably his fault.
He was alone at the mansion, Damian was at Dick's house, Jason was ignoring him more than usual and Tim was on a case where he didn't want help, not from him at least, even Duke was away, it wasn't a good week for Bruce.
He grabbed a phone he had hidden and only took out before going to sleep alone in his room, hesitated for a few seconds and sent a message to the only number added.
His "thing" with the boy, Danny Fenton, had started four years ago, the boy was lost and Bruce found him when he coincidentally went for a walk as a civilian.
Danny was so charmed by Bruce (for some reason) that he gave him his hotel room number to keep talking about the universe, and later his home number.
Danny was a good, funny and witty kid, a very smart too, with parents who didn't deserve him because they didn't notice their son's brilliance.
Danny was a good boy with a not-so-good life, a strong, independent boy who wasn't always positive but didn't always let himself fall apart.
That's why when Danny answered his message with a call with him crying and asking for help, he could only go to his rescue without looking back, barely remembering to tell Alfred of his departure.
When he arrived he found only tragedy.
His family and friends had died, an explosion at an unfortunate time, Danny had no one in the world besides his godfather and Bruce, and he didn't want to fall into Vlad's clutches, so he was desperate.
He also told him about Phantom, and Bruce could only hug him and promise him that no one was going to find him.
The first thing that came to his mind was to take him to his mansion, Danny was like his son, it was the most logical action... except that Danny still looked up to him and trusted him a lot, and wasn't that a scary thought?
Bringing Danny to the mansion would involve many things, Danny would meet his children, which might make Danny see him differently, goodbye to his admiration and affection, goodbye to spending time "together" watching bad movies to criticize them, goodbye to quiet conversations and asking for advice, goodbye to trust.
Bringing Danny to the mansion would mean having him physically close but keeping him away in every other possible way.
"Danny doesn't want anyone else to know about Phantom." Bruce repeated to himself as he took Danny to a small, hidden apartment in Gotham, a cozy little place where Vlad wouldn't find Danny (and neither would Bruce's family).
#dp x dc#danny phantom#batman#batfam#dc#batpham#dpxdc#danny fenton#No one told Danny about dangerous strangers#“The other woman” will start playing daily at the mansion when Dick finds out.#I was listening to “Say no to this” while I was typing#Danny is going to have a lot of fun being “the other” when he finds out that his existence is a secret.#I was planning to write everything from the POV of one of the batboys but I was a coward
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I'be been watching a danganronpa 2 LP as I work I'm on the final chapter and I'd like to state I'd die for them
#danganronpa#gundham tanaka#sonia nevermind#sondam#pleeease no spoilers about the end of the game I'm mid chapter 5#f#this game definitely has. issues. but it's insanely fun I love the rule of cool goofy looney tunes ass vibe and the writing can be very goo#I'm talking about this like I'm 90 I know it was huge but I was off doing god knows what when this came out I'm only now catching up
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hugs weren’t something the seven lords did often. they weren’t part of public appearances, and it’s something that proved difficult for them. even if it came naturally, that didn't mean anybody wanted to hug them.
but, hugs were something you had him doing much more often. whenever you were overjoyed, you’d throw your arms around him. when you were upset, you’d lean into him, arms open. even when there was no occasion, you’d hug him. hugs became synonymous with you.
it didn’t take him long to learn how much you loved them. so, whenever you were in a state, he’d reach for you. if you were stressed about family, anxious over a test, overwhelmed in a crowd, or even just in need of that enveloping comfort. you didn't need to do anything. maybe it was the pact, or maybe it was just how well he knew you, but he always had perfect timing.
breathing in his comforting smell and feeling the gentle warmth never failed to help you regain your strength. listening to his heartbeat, and letting your head rise and fall while rested on his chest was something only you were allowed to do. however long you needed him, even if it was all day, he'd be there.
and no matter what, at the end of the day, he’ll always be there for you. whether he’s touchy feely, or not, his arm will always be open. it's the least he could do for you.
after all, everyone deserves to be hugged.
#trying out something different just cause i felt like writing something fun but didn't know what to title it lol#gn reader#drabble#obey me#obey me!#obey me x reader#obey me satan#obey me shall we date#obey me lucifer#obey me mammon#obey me asmo#obey me! shall we date#obey me levi#obey me! shall we date?#obey me beel#obey me belphie
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Memories of Grandpa Hank
I'm eating a bag of mormon gorp that tastes like gasoline while watching the rain run down the mountain. The taste doesn't even bother me anymore - all homemade gorp tastes like this. It's just a natural consequence of everyone keeping their prepper shit in their garages.
My dad's out in the clearing, wandering around with his GPS. He's got some pieces of wire out on top of it to try and make the effective antennae bigger, but it just makes it look like he's dowsing. Another mormon tradition. I ask him if he's close to find water yet, and he looks up at me, little rivers flowing off him, and says yeah - he can feel it.
I'm sure he can. I settle under my tree and watch the droplets roll down the needles. Awaiting the final judgement of Judge GPS.
A few minutes later, it provides:
Turns out my dad forgot to record the location of the car this morning. The GPS remembers where we parked yesterday, but by luck my dad knows how to get from there to our car. Downside is that it's a nine mile walk just to get to yesterday's position, then another five miles to backtrack. That's fourteen miles total.
I'm only thirteen.
Think you can make it? my dad asks. And it's a kindness that he's worried, but it's not like there's an alternative. What else would I do, sit down in the murk and cross my fingers he finds me again? Ask him to carry me 14 miles?
I'll be pretty jelly legged, I say. But yeah. I'll make it.
Attaboy, he says. He fishes a bag of poptarts out and offers me one as - I think - a peace offering. A, sorry you're gonna have to walk 14 miles in the rain because I goofed kind of gift.
I take a bite and, despite being individually wrapped, it still manages to taste like diesel fumes. We start hiking our incredibly long distance in terrible weather for foolish reasons, and I joke to my dad that the only way to make this day any more mormon would be by pushing handcarts.
He laughs. Neither of us laugh again until 11 pm, when we stumble like drunkards into camp. My grandpa has stayed up late to make sure we weren’t lost, but he only stays up long enough to see us arrive. We try to eat a dinner of sweet potato stew, but after falling asleep in the middle twice, we agree to just go to bed.
I sleep in well past nine and wake up to nobody in camp but my grandpa. My dad left with my sister to keep hunting around 5 am. I know that everyone assumes that their dad is invincible when they're 13, but I'm 28 now and part of me still thinks he's gonna live forever. That God made exactly one perpetual motion machine, and it raised me in the desert.
---
Around noon my grandpa suggests hunting again. If it was my dad, I'd probably tune him out, but I like my grandpa's style of hunting. My dad hikes and hikes and hikes until the elk get tired and just let him shoot them. My grandpa finds the sleepiest, sunniest, coziest field and takes a nap there, figuring if the elk have any decent taste they'll come there at some point.
Man's got a knack for knowing what elk like - he's right more often than not. I think he might've been an elk in a previous life.
I go with him, and much as I hate to admit it, the hike is good for me. I start off walking like a pirate on two peg legs, so stiff I might as well not have knees, but by the end of the mile and a half walk I'm almost normal. We make it to the edge of the clearing, and my grandpa finds a patch of grass taller and softer than the beds inside the trailer, and he curls up to sleep there. I look across the grass and I watch the comings and goings of critters through the field. Sometimes I use the scope to get a magnified view, but I never do so with my hand on the trigger. The thought of accidentally looking a person through that glass is something that sends a chill up my spine.
Some deer wander through the glen, but it'd take a fool to mistake one of them for an elk. A few hours later, my grandpa wakes up and asks if I want to wander around a little. It's a lovely day. Rain comes in bursts in Arizona, and the day after is almost always clear as can be. And for a short while, all the desert browns turn green and lush. Hard mosses turn squishy and cacti swell up like fresh baked muffins and for a while you can get why people settled in these god forsaken wastes.
So I go with him, and we walk on, me with my gun, him just taking in the forest. He looks so peaceful that I get a little jealous, but it's not until my grandpa stops and looks at me that I even notice it myself. Takes a mirror, sometimes, to know yourself.
Being near my grandpa is always a strange thing for me. He's quiet, and he doesn't talk much, and I don't ever get the feeling that he's particularly emotionally intelligent - but it's like he's interacting with a reality more raw and real than mine. Like I'm watching symbols on a screen and he's counting atoms. And sometimes, just being near him gives me access to that raw matter. Just something about how he is breaks the illusions of the world.
He looks at the gun like a foreign object, like he doesn't recognize it, then he looks at me. He speaks and he doesn't mince words.
What would you do if an elk came across the path and you shot it right now? he asks.
Well, I'd start cleaning it, I say, and he waves the words away like cobwebs in his face.
But would you celebrate? he presses.
And I look at him, and I don't actually see any judgement staring back. He knows the answer, and he's at peace with it. He’s asking so I can see it too. He’s being a mirror so I can see my own face.
I think I might actually cry, I admit. And he nods along in agreement before reaching forward to take the gun off my shoulder.
Lets just walk today, he says. No chance of killing anything. No worrying about that.
Right, I say.
He pops the chamber open and tosses me back my bullet. I catch it, and the relief I feel is palpable.
Can I change my mind? I ask, and he shrugs.
Whenever you want. Hunt or don’t. It’s not the hunting that I’m worried about. It’s seeing you ignore your conscience.
And for a moment, I'm there in the real world with him, and my gloves are off, and reality is a metal cube in my hand: Sharp and cold and heavy.
Or maybe that’s just the bullet.
---
We make it back to camp a bit later than my dad. We get there and he’s waiting for us. If he's tired, he doesn't show it.
How'd it go? he asks. My grandpa looks at me, and I don't know how to respond. I don't know how to explain it, and I am scared.
Great, he replies. It's a shame Babs only has a doe tag. We saw a five-point out there. Close enough to hit with a football.
No, my dad says. If his grin was a half inch wider, both ends of his mouth would meet in the back of his head and everything above his tongue would slide off.
Tell him Babs, grandpa says. And, not for the first time, and especially not the last, I try my hand at spinning a yarn.
It's pretty good. But at 13, I still have a lot to learn.
#i've been reading some cormac mccarthy lately and i decided to try my hand at present tense#it was pretty rough but a fun experiment#kind of like writing with my left hand instead of my right#been thinking about my grandpa lately#miss him#wild world out there#babylon-lore
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A I L U R A N T H R O P Y 1 0 1
#art#my art#oc#my ocs#my oc#werecat#werewolf#neon#werewolf oc#werecat oc#horror#wanted to do a fun little dossier thing!!! :-D#took waaay too long but YAAAY finally done#i want to make more dossier style stuff of different thangs too..... looking at my alien raptorid dudes#i need to draw up world building type pieces like mad#everything is stored in my brain like a vault i neeed to draw it all out#also if some of this doesnt make sense....... sorry!!! i think in pictures and writing stuff is hard
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Something's up with Starscream
https://archiveofourown.org/works/62255593
Starscream was loud.
It was a very well known fact about him. One of the first things anyone notices, ready. He was loud with his declarations of treachery against Megatron, he always did everything as dramatically as possible, and he was the most annoying Decepticon many had ever met.
This is why, when a couple solar cycles ago, he changed, Thundercracker was worried.
Or: Starscream and Soundwave swapped personalities due to something in Shockwave's lab!! It sucks that that isn't wide spread knowledge among those on the Nemesis...
Based on the comics by the wonderful @zorangezest
#thomas writes#transformers#transformers gen 1#starscream#thundercracker#fanfiction#transformers fanfic#personality swap au#ao3 writer#Thank you to the lovely Zorange for letting me make this based on their AU!!!!#It was so so so fun to write!!!!#Please check out their blog!!! :DDDD
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