#/equivalent of audible through transference i guess

[space-ninja-fashion-show]

I can't remember if i've mentioned this before or not but Alden hates getting rained on So Much and he always gets So Miserable about it. Especially once within the safety of the Orbiter/Dormizone

The cure to this misery is Become Dry And Cosy, the latter most ideally achieved via cuddles (usually Kohlrabi or Lanius)

He becomes Even Worse about it once they find Kodiak bc his reasons are no longer exclusively "i hate this i'm suffering this sucks" but also trying so hard to bait Kodiak into laying his coat over him and ideally also cuddling with him. And every single time Kodiak does fall for what Alden classifies as his Evil Plans and Kodiak classifies as being adorable

[rimmers-swimming-certificate]

Red Dwarf fanfic - Comatose (18/19)

part 1 | part 2 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 | part 6 | part 7 | part 8 | part 9 | part 10 | part 11 | part 12 | part 13 | part 14 | part 15 | part 16 | part 17

The bed in the medi-bay was as hard and uncomfortable as Lister remembered. He wriggled around a little, trying to find a position that wasn’t going to leave him with bruised, aching muscles after a couple of days of inactivity.

“Ah!” said Kryten. “Here it is.” He was standing with his back to Lister as he riffled through a storage unit at the side of the room. Lister moved his head to one side in an attempt to see what it was that Kryten had found, but without getting off the bed it was impossible. He didn’t bother. Instead, he waited, drumming his fingers nervously on the surface of the bed and quietly humming a tune.

When Kryten turned around, he was brandishing a very large syringe filled with clear fluid. Lister stared at it, and felt his mouth go dry. “I’d forgotten about this part,” he said.

Kryten held the syringe so that the long needle pointed upward, and tapped on it a few times to coax any air bubbles to the surface, then depressed the plunger to expel the air, along with a large drop of the… stuff. The mind enema, Kryten had called it, the first time they had tried this.

“You didn’t seem to mind last time,” Kryten told him.

Lister licked his lips and very deliberately didn’t look at the drop of liquid rolling down the very long, very sharp needle. “Last time I was comatose, Kryten.”

“Oh, yes of course. The time before that, then,” Kryten tried.

“The time before that I’d been chloroformed. By you. It was when Rimmer ordered you to knock me out and help him steal my body, remember?”

“Oh,” said Kryten. “Right. Which frankly, makes me wonder why you’re doing this. With all due respect sir, have you taken leave of your senses?”

Lister shook his head. Not looking at the needle made it seem bigger, somehow, as though it was magnified by his imagination, so he looked at it again. To his horror, he discovered that no, actually, he had been remembering it right. In fact, if anything, it looked bigger now. He didn’t look away; he felt more comfortable when he could keep an eye on it. “Does the needle have to be that big?” he asked.

“Well, yes sir,” Kryten told him, surprised. “It needs to be long enough to penetrate right to the brain. We’ve got to really stab it in there, pierce right through the temple to the soft tissue beyond.”

He sounded disturbingly cheerful about the whole thing, and Lister felt vaguely sick. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“Now…” said Kryten, “Before I stab you in the head, I just want to make sure you’re absolutely certain about this. You’re not… under any duress, are you?”

“Duress?”

“Yes. I mean, Mr Rimmer isn’t… you did tell me that once you were healed I was never to use this technology on you again.”

Lister nodded. He remembered saying that. It had been his first day as a hologram, and he had already been desperate to get back into his body. Now look at him. It was strange how quickly things changed. “I said never without my permission, Kryten,” he clarified. “You have my permission. If you didn’t, would I be laying on a bed waiting for you to inject me in the head?”

“You could be testing me,” Kryten suggested.

Lister sighed. “I’m not.”

“So you really want me to do this?”

Lister closed his eyes. This was proving to be a lot more difficult than he had expected. It was one thing to come up with the idea and ask Kryten to do it, it was another entirely to have to face a barrage of questions from a mechanoid brandishing a giant syringe, and still stick to the plan. He was beginning to feel relieved that he hadn’t told Rimmer about this in advance. It meant that he could still back out if he needed to.

“I mean,” Kryten continued, “it is a very unusual request, and frankly, given your recent head injury, it is very worrying.”

“What? Why’s it worrying?” asked Lister. “You’re not saying it’s dangerous are you?” He wasn’t doing it if it was dangerous.

“Oh, no sir,” Kryten promised. “The procedure itself is quite safe. What worries me is the possibility that your head injury caused damage that we weren’t aware of; something resulting in you experiencing sympathy for Mr Rimmer.”

Lister sighed. If only there was some way to do this without Kryten’s help. Unfortunately, it would have been impossible to do it himself, and there was no way he was going to trust the Cat with safely transferring his mind from one place to the other. There was no way he would trust the Cat with transferring anything from one place to another.

“Or if not a brain injury, perhaps some variation on Stockholm Syndrome,” Kryten continued. “Of course I’m not implying that Mr Rimmer kidnapped you, but the effect may have been similar. I imagine the enforced time seeing the universe through his eyes, as it were, may have had unexpected consequences.”

“What are you saying?” Lister asked.

Kryten shrugged his shoulders. “Perhaps nothing, sir, but perhaps that the trauma of your time as a hologram has damaged you psychologically to the point where you empathise with Mr Rimmer.”

Lister shook his head.

“See? This time last year a statement like that would have revolted and horrified you. Now, you’re still laying there waiting for me to inject you in the head. And I used the biggest needle I could find, too!”

“Kryten, what’s made me sympathise with Rimmer is you, downloading my brain into a hologram and leaving me to it for six months. Anyway, I’m not doing this for Rimmer. Not totally, anyway.”

“You’re… not? Then I’m completely confused. I was working on the assumption that you were doing this because you decided you liked Mr Rimmer.”

Lister shook his head. Oh God, he hoped Kryten didn’t mention that to Rimmer; he’d never hear the end of it. “It’s not like that. It’s…” he hesitated, trying to work out how to explain what he wanted to say. “Okay, so, you won’t judge me, right?”

Kryten hesitated. “Without knowing what you’re going to say sir, I can’t make that promise. I can, however, promise to pretend that I’m not judging you, whether or not I actually am.”

“Fine.” Lister sighed. It would have to do. “While I was in a coma, while I was a hologram, I… touched Rimmer.”

“That’s all?” Kryten said with obvious relief. “I mean, it’s a little distasteful, but hardly the end of the world.”

“No, I mean I…” Lister shook his head. Kryten didn’t need all the details. “I mean, I touched Rimmer, and I liked it.”

Kryten’s expression morphed into something close to disgust. “Oh, sir! You are sick!”

“Hey! You said you’d pretend not to judge me.”

“I…” Kryten hesitated. “I’m sorry, you’re absolutely right. Enjoyed touching Mr Rimmer, you say? Well that’s completely f… Completely fiiiiii… fiiiiinnnnn…” He shook his head. “I’m sorry sir, I can’t do it. I thought I could, but I just can’t.”

Lister sighed. “We didn’t, like… there was no…” he lowered his voice to barely audible levels, “sex or anything. It was just, like physical contact. Hugs and… ” he broke off and shook his head, probably best not to mention sleeping in the same bed, or the kiss. “Look, people need to be touched, okay? And I hadn’t been for a long time.”

Kryten put the syringe down in a metal tray. “That’s simply not true,” he said. “I touch you all the time.”

“Kryten, hoovering me down when I drop crumbs down my shirt isn’t the same thing. Anyway it didn’t even matter that it was Rimmer, that’s how much I needed it.”

“You must have been desperate.”

Lister shrugged. “Yeah, I guess I was. And now I’m me again, I miss it, you know? Plus, Rimmer’s been in a bad mood for months now. I didn’t notice at first, I guess I was too focussed on recovering, but Cat pointed it out to me a couple of weeks ago and he’s right. You have to have noticed.”

“Of course. He’s been at least 52% more petty and 67% more irritable, and yes, it definitely is getting worse. He’s been the hologramatic equivalent of a moody teenager who someone told to stop being so moody.”

“Yeah, tell me about it. And did you know he’s started revising again?”

Kryten frowned. “Revising?”

“For the astronavigation exam. That’s the thing with Rimmer, when he’s feeling unhappy he never just sits around feeling sorry for himself like a normal person, he has to throw himself into some stupid task, like alphabetising our quarters, or learning Esperanto. Or in this case, passing the astronavs.”

“But Mr Rimmer can’t pass the astronavigation exam,” Kryten said. “If he could, surely he would have done it one of the other nine times that he tried. The only thing that can possibly happen if he does this, is that he’ll fail and end up in an even worse mood than he already is.”

Lister nodded. “Exactly. So if he’s doing the exam again because he’s unhappy, what we need to do is find what’s making him unhappy, and fix it. Right?”

“It stands to reason sir, yes.”

“So, if I’m missing being touched and I’ve got a physical body, imagine how he feels. He’s been a hologram for years, all of a sudden he could touch again. I mean, he could only touch me, but it’s something, right? Then I go back to my body and he’s back to square one.”

“I see,” said Kryten.

“So I figured maybe this would help both of us. If I can do this a couple of days every few months or so, it’d be good for both of us, and as an added bonus, maybe we can stop Rimmer from driving us all crazy.”

Kryten considered it. “So, if I’m understanding you correctly,” he said. “You believe that the only reason Mr Rimmer has been making us all miserable, is that he needs a hug.”

Lister shrugged. “Basically, yeah.”

“And extrapolating from what you said about your own experiences, the only reason he needs a hug is because you hugged him in the first place, and inadvertently reminded him that he enjoys physical contact.”

“Uh…” Lister shrugged again, “Yeah, I suppose.”

Kryten picked up the syringe again. “In that case, sir, I withdraw my objection. I’m more than happy to stick a needle into your head.”

(thank you to @norwegianpornfaerie​ for the beta)

(next)

[jjoelswatch]

I HAVE SEEN THE WAR OF THE STARS

This was a very different Star Wars movie in the best ways possible. Whether you loved it or hated it, this movie would not have been possible without SW:TLJ, full stop. Personally, I liked this movie a lot. SW:ROTS is my favorite just because it’s a) the movie that got me to like Star Wars and b) Anakin, so nothing really compares to that for me but. I think I can largely attribute what I did like about this movie to how much it reminded me of story arcs in Clone Wars or Rebels (namely Mortis, Malachor, and the World Between Worlds), with the little caveats/side quests and side characters and the focus on arcane Force powers.

What I liked:

Kylo Ren and Rey being collective badasses on two opposite spectrums of the Force. You really get the sense that as things continue to become unbalanced, the more and more their powers grow. This movie is truly a love letter to fans of both Rey and Kylo Ren, because they both have largely satisfying developments (in their powers and their character growth). I’ve never hated Kylo Ren like a lot of people do. I like his character, I think he’s - at least - cool. This movie really showcased how formidable he was right off the bat-- from Title Scroll to opening scene. And if this movie showed how powerful he was, it REALLY doubled down on how strong Rey is. More on this throughout this ramble post.

Holy Sith lore, Batman.

Rey’s training sequence was everything Luke’s training sequence in SW:TESB should have been (limited ofc by film techniques of its time); I thoroughly enjoyed it. I know a lot of people are complaining about it, since she adamantly chose not to walk the path of a Jedi, but I liked that Leia got to be her Jedi Master.

Even though it was in the trailer, Rey flipping over the Kylo’s ship and slicing the wing off with her lightsaber was rad af.

Also followed by another rad af moment of her Force pulling the ship, like damn girl.

My face when Rey used Sith lightning was one of genuine shock like holy shit. This is also when I knew the “Force bloodline” twist ahead of time. It allowed me to become (mostly) okay with it. But damn, even Kylo Ren is like “...fuck”.

AUDIBLE SIGH OF RELIEF THAT CHEWIE DIDN’T DIE. Actual personification of that one bear vine.

Former spice-runner Poe is...sexy. What a concept.

Kijimi planet sequence was really cool. It also hammered home the entire space nazi motif in a very in-your-face way, which I appreciated because I feel like people try to rationalize the Empire and First Order as not being that, when that’s literally what they are. It also introduced Zorii Bliss, who I really enjoyed.

I really liked the style of the Force bond/Force Dyad moments in this movie. We got a good handful of them in TLJ and they were cool (and confirmed to not just be Snoke causing them with that movie’s end scene), but these were better. Just the way the scenes transition and the tangible objects being transferred between them.

Her parentage reveal, the mirror of the “join me” scene from TLJ [chef’s kiss] *

General Hux being the spy really reminded me of Alexsandr Kallus being Fulcrum in SW:Rebels, except Kallus was hotter and had less petty reasons for betraying the Empire.

The space horse...tusk...creatures. I love them.

Rey and Kylo Ren’s fight on the Death Star wreckage. Finally, at long last, we get to see some prequels level Jedi flips and jumps. FINALLY!

Leia’s last sacrifice c’:

Rey striking down Kylo Ren, healing him, telling him that she had wanted to take his hand when he offered, but she’d wanted to take Ben’s hand. So perfect.

Ben and Han’s mirrored scene from the bridge scene in TFA with Kylo and Han, line for line, with the right choice made this time. Just the combined effort of his father’s memory and his mother’s sacrifice having him throw his lightsaber into the ocean, killing Kylo Ren and becoming Ben Solo once more. So emotionally satisfying. **

Also: “Dad...” “I know.” very nice callback to TESB.

Force Ghost!Luke c’: catching that lightsaber as Rey goes to throw it into the flames; nice resolution to Luke’s arc from TLJ.

LUKE AND LEIA TRAINING SCENE FLASHBACK!!

Kylo Ren’s redemption/turn to the light was something that I thought I would hate, but I actually thought it was the one consistent character arc in the sequel films. I actually enjoyed it a lot, like everything about him turning to the light was handled well and you can track its path through the entire sequel trilogy. Don’t @ me.

Ben doing the classic Han Solo No Look Shot-- with Lando’s blaster (how did he get that?)

Ben absolutely butchering the Knights of Ren wearing the space equivalent of a sweater and jeans. Just the epitome of chaotic Skywalker/Solo energy. Iconic.

Enjoyed Ben’s little shrug of “finally” when Rey used their Force bond to transfer him one of the lightsabers to use. Was sitting there watching him fight like, get this man a lightsaber.

Also, regarding that moment, just the pause within their Force bond, actually, truly seeing each other.

All the voices of the Jedi. Chills. I heard Luke, Obi-Wan, Yoda, Windu, Kanan, Anakin. Ahsoka. ***

Rey’s sacrifice. Ben’s sacrifice. For a moment, I thought they were going to kill both of them and Palpatine (which I would have hated and appreciated at once; zero it out, bring balance to the Force via a flatline), or leave Rey dead and Ben alive to be haunted by his own deeds and demons. It was a surprise that Ben could use Force healing in the way Rey displayed earlier in the film, but a good one. Thanos vc: a soul for a soul.

“Ben” c’: such a bittersweet moment of acknowledgement and redemption tbh. ****

Rey burying Luke (Anakin’s) and Leia’s sabers on Tatooine c’: *****

Rey’s yellow lightsaber made from her staff. I wonder if it’s double-bladed (I bet it is).

I had a feeling one way or another that by the end of the movie Rey would be taking the Skywalker name for herself. I’m sure this made a lot of people angry. I’m not one of them.

What I didn’t like:

Not much tbh!

The Reylo kiss I guess, since it felt shoehorned in since they were both enemies 12 hours prior (if that). It would have felt more natural if it had just been a brief embrace or (as a friend suggested) a forehead touch. I’m totally okay with Rey and Ben having this strong connection through the Force, but no matter where you stand on the idea of those characters being romantically involved, you have to admit that they just weren’t there yet to have that kiss. ******

Conflicted that the Skywalker bloodline is gone. Like, trust me, I know the point - or one of the major ones - of this film is that blood doesn’t dictate choices/blood isn’t important, but like...I really love the Skywalkers, okay?

Palpatine being alive in this pretty much invalidates Anakin’s journey in the first six episodes, which sucks because in this house we love and appreciate Anakin Skywalker. You get a sense that Palpatine’s return was definitely never the end goal for this trilogy. It doesn’t feel planned because it’s never explained how he’s back, how he survived. We’re left to assume that it’s Sith power sustaining him. We never find out how Palpatine (who’s basically a zombie, I mean, look at him) managed to create a massive fleet of Star Destroyers capable of destroying planets. That’s just how it is, deal with it.

Asterisks/Questions Unanswered/Misc.:

* Still can’t believe Rey Palpatine fan theories DID THAT. Press F to pay respects to my Rey Kenobi theories (which would have made more sense with a Force bond but WHATEVER).

** This is where I would have wanted Anakin’s Force Ghost moment to be, especially since Kylo Ren idolized the ideal of Vader for so long, I felt it would have been a nice touch to have Anakin step in here, while across the galaxy Rey is being reached out to by Luke. Ultimately though, I think Han worked best.

*** Look, I know Ahsoka’s voice was in the past Jedi/Force Ghost moment, but like...my girl ain’t dead. Togruta live for over 200+ years, plus she was resurrected with the power of The Daughter. She just Force Skyped in to give Rey an inspirational line. Also Ahsoka is...not a Jedi, so ? interesting.

On that note, the above scene also reminds me 100% of Ezra’s moment in The World Between Worlds.

**** Really wish redemption didn’t always have to mean death, but I also understand that just like in ROTJ with Vader, there was a slim-to-none chance of a future for Ben after doing everything he’d done. But I also think death is...an easy out, when you don’t want to think about how a character can continue to atone for their deeds. I would have liked to see Ben live.

***** As for burying Luke and Leia’s sabers in the sands of Tatooine, Luke never associated himself with Anakin’s saber, so she buried Anakin’s saber in a place he hated and associated with so much pain and loss.

****** Reylo has never really been a ship I sailed, though I’ve never expressly hated it (there are certainly far more uncomfortable scenes with Anakin and Padma in AOTC than there have been between Rey and Kylo Ren in the sequel films), but if one of them is going to die, don’t have them kiss. If you’re going to have them kiss, let them live.

Finn never really did get to tell Rey what he wanted to tell her, huh? I joke. I think it’s obvious by the final act of the movie that he wanted to tell her that he could feel the Force, that he’s Force sensitive. This was hinted at in TFA during several beats (especially when he fights Kylo Ren-- anyone can use a lightsaber, but it’s kinda curious that he could hold his own for a bit).

This movie radiates a bi energy in ways I can’t describe. All the stuff with Poe being real concerned about what Finn wanted to tell Rey when he thought they were going to die? Poe and Zorii? Finn and Jannah? Poe and Rey? Really can’t believe they cut away before Finn and Poe kissed in the end celebration scene.

Ben Solo > Kylo Ren