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cheesybadgers · 2 years ago

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Narcos Fic: Old Habits Die Hard (Chap. 20)

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Pairing: Horacio Carrillo x Javier Peña

Words: 12,880

Summary: An invitation takes Horacio and Javier back to Medellín, a city that has changed as much as they have since they were last in it. Amongst the celebrations, can they find a way to reconcile the old with the new?

Warnings: 18+ ONLY. Emotional smut, religious themes, discussions of canon-typical violence and past trauma, grief, healing, allusions to period-typical prejudices, smoking, drinking, swearing.

Notes: So, this chapter took on a life of its own and ended up a lot bigger than it was originally supposed to be, oops lol. The initial idea was for this and chapter 21 to be chapter 20, but, as you can see, it didn't quite work out like that 😂

The majority of chapter 21 is done, I just need to finish it off but life (and covid...again) have been getting in the way lately.

After that, I just have chapter 22 and a short epilogue to do, then fin. So, I promise we are very nearly there now! Ideally, I'd like it all done by the end of autumn, but that might not be possible...let's see how it goes.

Thank you once again to anyone still reading and waiting for updates, your patience is greatly appreciated (as always, please feel free to drop me a line if you’d like to, I love hearing from you!)❤️

I’ve also added to my OHDH trivia post to cover this chapter if anyone is interested (and there's quite a few new points for this one, as I ended up doing a lot of research lol).

Chapter 20: Something Old, Something New

Dappled light filtered through the Venetian blinds, splintering across the polished wooden furnishings and along the plush carpeted floor, bathing the hotel room in tints of gold. No traces remained of yesterday’s rain after a warm start to the morning, and the forecast miraculously looked promising for the hours ahead.

Horacio stood facing a floor-length mirror, his fingers wrestling with his jacket and a Cattleya orchid buttonhole until he tutted and gave up. It was the final addition to his outfit: a three-piece mid-grey suit, a pale olive green dress shirt, a bottle green tie and dark brown shoes.

“Come here.” Javier abandoned fastening his burgundy tie, letting it hang untied and loose around his neck. Instead, he took the buttonhole from Horacio and delicately pinned the flower on his left lapel. It matched the one already placed on his navy blue three-piece, which he had teamed with a rose-pink dress shirt and black shoes.

“Thanks. It’s been a long time since I’ve worn one of these. I’m out of practice.” The last wedding Horacio attended had been a friend of Juliana’s, and for some reason, attaching a flower to his jacket was trickier than his CNP lapel pins.

“At least the last time wasn’t your own wedding…which you never actually made it to.”

“Fair point.”

Javier smoothed down Horacio’s lapels, slow caresses on either side, chestnut lost in charcoal as he took all of him in. “Beautiful.”

“Likewise.” Horacio’s fingers slid up to Javier’s tie and worked their magic, managing a knot neater than Javier could ever make. He positioned and repositioned it at the collar until it was symmetrical.

“Satisfied?”

“Hmm, not quite.” He took hold of the length of the tie, pulling Javier down a couple of inches to his height, fresh mint and aftershave hitting their senses as they settled into it, careful not to squash the flowers at their breast.

Javier breathed hard against Horacio’s mouth. “I take it we haven’t got time for—”

“Absolutely not.” Although Horacio was panting as he re-straightened Javier’s tie, the sight of each other in formal wear a distracting novelty. “We’re meeting Steve downstairs in 5 minutes.”

“Shame. I miss Madrid already.”

“Our bed will still be there when we get back.”

“Who said anything about a bed?”

“Come on, we can’t be late,” Horacio reiterated with great reluctance, avoiding the look he knew Javier was giving him. “You ready?”

Javier took a deep breath and picked up the invitation from the nearby nightstand, his eyes scanning over the details one last time.

Juana Marisol Vargas Restrepo

Felipe Gabriel Trujillo Rojas

Con la bendición de sus familias, te invitan a celebrar su boda

(With the blessing of their families, they invite you to celebrate their wedding)

El sábado, 21 de enero de 1995

(Saturday 21st January, 1995)

A las tres de la tarde

(At 3 in the afternoon)

Iglesia del Señor de las Misericordias, Manrique

(Church of the Lord of the Mercies, Manrique)

Recepción a seguir en el Jardín Botánico de Medellín

(Reception to follow at the Botanical Garden of Medellín)

“I think so. Of all the churches in Medellín, though.”

Horacio let out a wry huff to match Javier’s. “I know. The bride’s choice, apparently. Plus, it’s close by for the reception.”

Javier hummed, his eyes still glued to the invitation as if the antidote to the discomfort simmering in the pit of his stomach was hidden between the lines.

“You okay?”

“Yeah…yeah, I’m fine. It was always gonna be like this. Wasn’t it? Being back here.”

“I don’t think there’s a way around it. But at least it’s a celebration this time.” Horacio placed a gentle kiss on Javier’s forehead. “And it’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.”

“I know.”

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After locating Steve, they shared a taxi to the church, where they met Connie and Olivia on account of Olivia being in a particularly fussy mood.

“I think it’s the travelling and being out of routine. She was up early this morning. So, of course, she’s tired now.” Connie gestured towards Olivia, fast asleep in her dad’s arms, before hugging Javier and Horacio.

“You look stunning, love the dress,” Javier said, noticing he owned a shirt in the same shade of turquoise.

“Aw thank you, you all look so handsome!” Connie stood back to admire them then leaned in to kiss Steve. “And not hungover?” she added with a raised brow, rubbing away the smudge of lipstick left behind on his cheek. “I take it I need to thank Horacio again for keeping you in one piece?”

It took Horacio a second to get what Connie was referring to. But then he remembered a paralytic pair of DEA agents slumped in the back of his car, alongside practically carrying Javier to his bedroom, removing his outer layers and plying him with water, then lying him on his side with a pillow behind his back.

Horacio had been heading for the door when a slurred noise over his shoulder stopped him. One that sounded suspiciously like “Stay.” He couldn’t prove it or ask for clarification. But nor could he leave. So, he stayed until he was reassured Javier was safe and sleeping soundly. Then he tiptoed home, relieved the next day to find Javier had no recollection of any of it.

“I don’t know about that,” Horacio said in the here and now. “We were all on our best behaviour for today.”

“Yeah, Murphy needs his beauty sleep these days. Isn’t that right?” Javier threw a wink in Steve’s direction and wondered if Connie’s choice of words meant what he thought they did.

“Well, some of us actually have to go to work, Peña,” Steve shot back with a self-satisfied curl of the lips.

Connie playfully slapped Steve on the shoulder. “Ignore him, he’s just jealous.”

“Can’t even deny it.”

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Guests began to file up the stone steps into the church, the Murphys following once they had roused Olivia awake, with Javier and Horacio hanging back at the top of the stairs.

Their arms rested over the balcony wall as they surveyed the road beneath. There was no CNP vehicle parked up this time, but instead, a hive of activity with guests being dropped off and a space reserved for the bride’s imminent arrival.

“It feels like a fucking lifetime ago, doesn’t it?”

“It was.”

“I, er, never saw her again. Helena, I mean. I secured her a visa – figured it was the least I could do after everything. But she took her kid and ran before I could give it to her. Her neighbour said she was staying with her sister in Peru, but…who knows?”

Javier wasn’t sure if she even had a sister, but he always hoped it was the truth. He always hoped she and her family were safe and that she found the strength to put what happened behind her. But of course, he had no fucking clue if these were comforting lies he’d told himself over the years. It wasn’t love, whatever they had. Far from it. He knew that back then let alone now. But for a short while, they cared in their own way, and as much as their circumstances and jobs allowed them to.

“Probably for the best. It wouldn’t have been safe here.”

“No, I made sure of that.” Javier’s hand dug harshly into the jagged stone, leaving dents in his skin until the subtle and discreet touch of a finger made contact with his own, pulling him out of his spiralling self-flagellation. “Shit, sorry. I didn’t plan on bringing all this up. Especially not today.”

“It’s okay. And it’s not like we ever really talked about it at the time.”

It had been a sore point for Horacio, not that he understood why back then. Of course, he knew Helena wasn’t the first or the last, but he could see whatever they had, however short-lived, went beyond the mere transactional. He’d never seen Javier so worried for an informant, and as it turned out, he had every reason to be. Then, she stopped being a threat and became yet another victim.

“Funnily enough, no. You just took it out on Steve instead.”

A knowing look eased the tension in an instant.

“Could you blame me?”

“Absolutely not. Especially when he was encroaching on your territory.”

Javier couldn’t resist a wink, which caused a muttered “Fuck you” followed by their shoulders shaking in unison.

Once calm was restored, Horacio turned to face the church, the wall bearing the brunt of his weight. “Looking back now, though, I don’t think I should’ve been so surprised by what you did for me in Cartagena and Tolú.”

“Why’s that?”

“Because I did the same for you that night here in Medellín.”

Javier joined Horacio; both now stood side by side, their gaze meeting in an acknowledgement of the rich history that existed between them that no words could ever fully convey.

And with the scattered remnants of their past now confined to distant memories they could at last put behind them, they made their way into the church.

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A waterfall of roses, carnations and orchids tied together with matching ribbons cascaded a rainbow of purple, yellow and white down the rows of pews. The flowers were supplied by the mother of the groom, who conveniently was a florist by profession. Every August, Medellín burst into bloom for Feria de las Flores, so if anyone was going to be in charge of the arrangements, it was her.

Candles lit a path from the aisle to the altar, reminding Horacio not only of Día de las Velitas but of his and Javier’s recreation of the festival during their first Christmas in Laredo. He was about to take a seat when he caught a flash of green dress uniform in the wings of the church and a pair of dark eyes picking him out of the congregation.

He excused himself to the sacristy at the side of the altar.

Trujillo peered out to the pews as his hands alternated between fidgeting with the knot of his tie and his cufflinks. “Is she here yet?”

“Not yet.” Horacio straightened Trujillo’s tie knot. “But it’s still early.”

“Yeah.” Trujillo nodded and took a deep breath.

“She’ll be here before you know it. So relax. I think we’ve been through worse.” Horacio’s lips stayed neutral for an impressively long spell until he caved.

“My hand was steady as a rock on that rooftop. But today?” Trujillo held out his hand to show the hint of a tremor.

“You ended something once and for all on that rooftop. Something that needed ending…for your father, Alfredo and Sebastián. For you. For Colombia. But today is the start of your future.”

“I always thought they would have been here for this one day. So, thank you. For being here instead. For coming back...after everything. For all those early morning drills and target practice. And for the free drinks.”

They laughed at the fact Horacio was a man of his word and hadn’t let Trujillo buy a single drink since arriving here.

“It’s the least I could do. And if you ever need anything, Felipe, don’t be afraid to ask.”

“Likewise…Horacio. That goes for Javier, too.”

Their silence was an acknowledgement that they had just shared an ending and a beginning of their own, no longer comrades in arms or superior and subordinate, but something different again, something equal.

“I thought my ears were burning,” came a voice from the doorway.

“Great way to kill the moment, Peñita.”

“Sorry. I wanted to wish you luck. And offer you some Dutch Courage, if you're interested?” Javier produced a hip flask from behind his back. “A present from Search Bloc,” was his answer to the quizzical looks he was met with.

“Just a taste, then. I don’t want Juana thinking I’m drunk.” Trujillo took a restrained swig. “Any last-minute advice?” he asked Javier, passing him the flask.

“You want marriage advice from me? Er, don’t do a runner before she gets here?”

“Good one, brother.”

“He did warn you,” Horacio added, shooting Javier a pointed look.

“True. Although,” Trujillo lowered his voice and glanced at the doorway, “neither of you might be married, but…you’ve been through a lot together. And I think it’s made you stronger. So, you must be doing something right.”

A wordless nod and one last swig for good measure were exchanged.

Javier and Horacio were unsure if it was the alcohol or something else causing the heat to rise in their cheeks. But either way, they were in quiet agreement with Trujillo’s assessment.

It wasn’t long before the words “She’s here!” were whispered with barely contained glee from beyond the door, and it was time to take their places.

The ceremony, even the drier elements, passed quicker than most weddings Javier and Horacio had been to. It was the first one Javier had attended since…well, not even his own now he thought about it because he never made it to the church. He never saw Lorraine’s dress either, as, unsurprisingly, she had changed out of it by the time he was forced to explain himself. Not that Javier really could explain at the time. But then, it was much easier to understand something was wrong once he knew what was right.

Between Felipe’s pristine uniform and Juana’s mantilla veil, memories of Horacio's Mamá wearing a strikingly similar black veil to his Papá’s funeral came to mind. But once upon a time, they had also stood at an altar like this with their shared life ahead of them, and even though the injustice of it being cut short would always linger, on this occasion, Horacio chose to cherish the fact it existed in the first place.

Furtive glances travelled between him and Javier as they bowed their heads to pray during the candle ceremony and for the exchange of rings and arras coins. It was a silent confirmation that whilst these rituals weren’t an option for them in the eyes of the law or church, their unofficial versions were no less significant.

------------------------------------------------------

They moved on to the reception at Jardín Botánico de Medellín in the evening, a place Horacio hadn’t been to since his youth. The wedding meal was to be served under a spectacular orchid-shaped wooden canopy in the centre of the gardens. Tables dressed in white linen were decorated with flower arrangements to match those at the church, and favours included coffee beans and orchid seeds.

The newlyweds sat at the top table surrounded by close family and their padrinos and madrinas, the echoes of war still loud and everlasting given the notable absences. Javier, Horacio, Steve, Connie and Olivia sat on the next one, along with some familiar Search Bloc faces and Carlos Holguín staff.

At the adjacent table were Martínez Senior and Junior. Horacio and Martínez Senior had only crossed paths at occasional ceremonies and dinners, even though their fathers worked more closely in the past. As the war on drugs kicked in, it became apparent the two men had polar opposite approaches to their jobs. And whilst Horacio made Escobar his mission, Martínez took a different path, specialising in FARC operations in the jungle instead. Until their paths converged, that was.

“Do you think he knows?” Javier muttered over the rim of his champagne flute after Martínez Senior’s eyes briefly fell on them.

“About us? Why would he?” Horacio replied into the palm of his hand as he scratched his upper lip.

“I dunno. He knew about everything else. And he must have questions.”

“I’m sure he does. But do you think he’ll even want to speak to us? I already know he hates my guts.”

“He might be pleasantly surprised you’re not dead. You never know.”

Their hushed conversation was thankfully drowned out by Olivia interrogating Connie about everything from the guests’ outfits to the flower arrangements and when the food was coming, whilst Steve caught up with Jacoby.

The tables were soon full of plates and dishes bearing carne asada, lechona, patacones, arepas, tamales, milhojas, concadas, cuajada con melao, fruit salads and the centre piece Torta Negra Colombiana, decorated with flowers to match the colour scheme.

The cutting of the Torta Negra followed before the space was re-arranged, guests spilling out into the surrounding gardens, refreshing their drinks at the various pop-up bars or walking amongst the flowers and trees.

By dark, a dancefloor was unveiled in the centre of the canopy with a band playing cumbia, vallenato, merengue, bambuco, salsa and beyond.

Once the bride had thrown her bouquet, the single male guests gathered to place a shoe beneath her dress. Javier managed to escape the ritual in favour of sitting back and watching from the sidelines. But at the risk of inviting prying questions from his former colleagues if he did the same, Horacio reluctantly added his shoe to the pile. Typically, his was chosen by Juana, which, as per tradition, meant he would be next to marry.

From several feet away, Horacio could see Javier’s suggestive eyebrow and overt smirk, and they were even more brazen close up when Horacio re-joined him.

“Should we pick out rings, or…?”

An eyeroll was the only answer Javier was ever going to get to that question, and it came right on cue.

“Because, er,” Javier continued regardless, clearing his throat and casually glancing around to make sure no one was in earshot, “seeing you in your shirt stays this morning got me thinking how fucking good you’d look in a wedding garter.”

As Horacio was hit with a barrage of mental images and a dry mouth, a large cheer erupted as the next tradition got underway. This time, all male guests – not just the single ones – were rounded up to remove their belts, the idea being that the man with the longest belt was the winner. Of what exactly, Horacio was never sure when this had played out at past Colombian weddings he’d been to.

He stood opposite Javier as they fumbled with buckles, unhooking the leather straps from their belt loops and pulling them off in one swift motion. Their eyes remained fixed on each other from start to finish, an act fuelled by Javier’s last words.

The sound of cheering pulled them back with reluctance to the proceedings, and even though their belts were probably slightly longer than they used to be, they weren’t declared the winners.

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As the drinks flowed, so did the dancing, regardless of whether the paired-up guests knew each other or whether they could actually dance.

Javier’s next partner was a familiar face, though, who had at least taken a few dance classes to get to know some locals when first arriving in Colombia.

“Is Steve with Olivia?” he asked, grateful for a slower number so he could catch his breath and talk.

“Oh, no, she’s with the Jacobys. She’s made friends with their daughter, Chloe - they’re around the same age.” Connie twirled underneath Javier’s outstretched arm and back around again. “Steve is conveniently helping Horacio with the next round of drinks. He always did have hips as stiff as a board. I had to practically drag him up for our first dance.”

“That…doesn’t surprise me.”

“And what about Horacio?” Connie whispered into Javier’s shoulder as their feet slid across the floor in time with the music. “Does he need to loosen his hips, or is he a dark horse?”

“You should know a man never dances and tells. But…” Javier spun Connie on her heel again, pulling her close so his head was near her ear this time. “I can assure you there’s nothing wrong with his hips.”

“That doesn’t surprise me either. When did you say you were heading to Manizales?”

“In a couple of days.” Javier swallowed hard now the subject had been raised.

“How’s he holding up?”

“Okay. We’ve not really talked about it since Madrid. Figured we’d deal with it after the wedding, but -” Javier scoffed, cutting himself off mid-sentence.

“Now it’s nearly here,” Connie finished for him.

“Exactly. But I guess we couldn’t hide in Spain forever.” As tempting as it was some days.

They somehow made it to the other side of the dancefloor, narrowly avoiding multiple couples before escaping back to their table once the song was over.

“How’re you finding being back again?” Connie asked.

“Weird.”

“Yeah. Definitely weird at first.”

Their shared laughter came like a sigh of relief, a release of tension now they had spoken the truth out loud.

“But different.”

“It’s not like last time, right?” There was uncertainty in her unblinking eyes, a plea not only for reassurance but for honesty as well.

“Trujillo said anyone left from the cartel with half a brain cell skipped town or went underground before Pablo’s body was cold. They’ve been tracking down anyone dumb enough to have stuck around. So, no. It’s not like last time. I promise.”

His tone was soft but he looked Connie in the eye until she nodded, needing the conviction as much as she did.

“I know I never visited Madrid like I said I would – blame your ex-employer for that, by the way – but for what it’s worth, I don’t think Medellín’s the only one who’s different now. So, whatever happens, Javi…”

“I know.”

His hand found its way to hers on the table and gently squeezed. An acceptance that there was no denying traces of the past, as they had already discovered, but a translucent overlay had been placed on top of it now. Whether the two could co-exist in the long run, nobody yet knew, but at least it was finally the chance of a future for them and Medellín.

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Horacio picked one of the quieter bars, reeling off a list of drinks to the bartender and perching on a stool while he waited for his order.

“Thought you might need a hand.”

Before Horacio could respond, Steve had already sat on the adjacent stool, his back to the bar to accommodate his long legs.

“You sure you’re not just avoiding the dancefloor, Agent Murphy?” There was a hint of a mock interrogative tone to his voice as he turned sideways to face Steve.

Steve held his hands up in surrender. “You got me there. Although…” He dipped into the inside pocket of his black suit jacket and pulled out a couple of cigars. “Courtesy of the groom, if you’re interested?”

Horacio broke into a laugh. “He paid up, then.”

“Damn right.” Steve held one of the cigars closer to Horacio, tempting him despite the conflicted look Horacio was giving it. “I won’t tell Javi if you don’t tell Con.”

Horacio sighed and rolled his eyes. “Fine.” He put the cigar between his lips and took the lighter from Steve, hovering the flame near the foot until it took.

Steve did the same, a woody haze soon encircling them.

The bartender appeared with a trayful of drinks and once he was gone again, Horacio lifted a beer bottle and slid it across to Steve. “I never got a chance to say thank you.”

“For what?”

“Stechner.”

A scowl stormed across Steve’s pupils, and he took a quick hard swig from his beer bottle, placing it back on the table with a little more force than intended. “It was my fuckin’ pleasure. You should’ve seen his face. Covered in blood and tears in his eyes when my hand squeezed his throat.”

He swapped his beer for his cigar, relishing in that sweet memory as a ring of smoke hovered above his head like a misplaced halo.

Every now and then, Steve still surprised Horacio. Because occasionally, Horacio caught glimpses of the turbulence that raged beneath the surface. It was a clumsier, more unrefined version than he was accustomed to, but he recognised and understood it nonetheless.

“Not sure I’d have been able to stop squeezing,” Horacio confessed.

“It was touch and go for a minute. But rumour has it, the new Country Attaché, Alana Cortés, and Messina were roommates all the way through their Academy days. And for a few years after…before Cortés took an assignment in Mexico out of the blue. But now she’s back.” Steve toasted the air with his beer bottle. “So good luck to our old friend, Bill, trying to pull her strings.”

Horacio raised his glass to meet Steve’s bottle, although there was an ulterior motive to leaning forward a fraction. “I take it you’ve heard nothing else about the photos?” His words were delivered towards the floor in case of the minutest likelihood anyone around them was the world’s best lip reader.

“Not a thing. But I’d handle it if something did happen; you have my word. Cali’s beyond my remit, but I’d put good money on Stechner’s attention being there now he can’t use us anymore.”

“You’re probably right.”

“Oh, and you were right, too.”

“About what?”

“Javi tryin' to shut me out.”

“Well, thanks for not letting him.”

They bowed their heads and returned to their cigars, a surprisingly comfortable silence sitting between them.

“How was he in Madrid?” Steve asked in the end.

“Good, mostly. There were bad days, obviously. But he sleeps better now.”

“He’s not the only one.”

“No. I think there’s a lot of that going around.”

“It’s weird though, right?”

“What’s that?”

“Being back. Like it was all just some fuckin’ dream. Like it wasn’t really me on that rooftop. Like everyone knew it should’ve been you in that photo instead.”

Horacio might not have been there for the final showdown, but he'd seen enough newspapers and bulletins to know that photo well. The one where Escobar’s limp body was held up to the camera like a trophy, now the hunt was over.

“Yeah, well, I made sure it wasn’t me, didn’t I?” he said matter-of-factly. “I’ve had to make my peace with it. And so should you.”

“I played out that moment so many times. Thought about all the ways we’d catch him. Over and over, I let it run through my head. But I wasn’t expecting him to look so…pathetic. Like any other son of a bitch criminal runnin’ scared when his time’s up.”

“Because that’s all he was. But it was real. And he’s gone. No matter what happens, they can’t take that away from us.”

“But now what?”

“Now, we live our lives. We don’t forget, but we move on.”

“I’ll drink to that.”

Just as they toasted their drinks, they were rumbled.

“Might’ve known this is where you’d be hiding. Found them!” Javier called over his shoulder.

Trujillo followed behind Javier; his police uniform now exchanged for a lightweight guayabera. “Anything to avoid a dancefloor. Blondie, are those my cigars?”

“I think you’ll find they’re mine now, Major. I might have a couple of spares lying around, though.” Steve reached into his pocket and pulled out more like he was performing a magic trick.

Trujillo rubbed his hands together. “Now you’re talking.”

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Once Steve had braved the canopy to pass Connie her drink, the four men retreated to a deserted part of the gardens where pine tables and chairs with canvas covering them were dotted amongst the trees. White lights hung across the branches like fireflies and lanterns lined the decked walkways, the party and dancing reduced to a murmur in the distance.

The quartet sat around one of the pine tables, the first time they had been together like this since the old days back at Carlos Holguín.

“Can you believe we’re finally here?” Trujillo asked, savouring the spicy scent of his cigar as it combined with the fresh floral notes of the forest.

“At your wedding? Barely.”

Trujillo rolled his eyes at Javier’s teasing and shook his head. “You can tick comedian off your list of career options.”

Steve sucked in air through his teeth at their war of words. “See what I had to put up with.”

“Says the white boy who needed me to be his fucking translator 24/7.”

A collective braying sound travelled around the table this time before it morphed into laughter and Steve making use of any Spanish swear word he could think of.

“But in all seriousness...no, not really,” Javier replied in earnest after they returned to their cigars.

“Sometimes when I wake up, it takes me a minute to remember he’s not still lurking out there somewhere.”

“But he’s not.” Horacio’s eyes glowed with steely determination, needing to put a line under this once and for all. “You made sure of that. You gave Medellín a future. And now it’s time to start yours.” He raised his glass to the centre of the table. “To Juana and Felipe.”

“To Juana and Felipe!” Javier and Steve echoed as their drinks clinked with Horacio’s.

“And to Colombia,” Felipe added.

“To Colombia!”

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Once the cigars were stubbed out, Trujillo and Horacio were pulled away for a Search Bloc reunion, leaving Javier and Steve to their drinks.

“I was telling Carrillo about Cortés earlier.”

“How did you find out about her, by the way? You never said on the phone.”

“Just some good old fashioned slightly off-the-record detective work, that’s all.”

“You covered your tracks, though, right? Because they’ll know it was you who gave her my intel. Even if they can’t prove it.”

“’Course. Although it wouldn’t take a fuckin’ genius to figure that out. Same with Stechner’s busted face. Don’t think anyone bought it was your handiwork.”

“To be fair, there’s a critical shortage of geniuses in the DEA. Present company included, obviously.”

“Obviously.” Steve retaliated by raising his middle finger in response to Javier’s trademark wink. “But most people hate Stechner as much as we do, so no one came asking. Never saw him around the school again after that, although I’m sure he must’ve been prowlin' about somewhere.”

“More than likely. So, er…no one’s mentioned the photos either?”

“No. And like I told Carrillo, even if they did, I’d handle it, Javi. I promise. There’s more shit on Stechner out there, I fuckin’ know it. Messina was getting too close, remember. I don’t think I’ll have to dig deeper, but look at it as an insurance policy.”

“Makes sense. And thanks, Steve. For Stechner. For the intel. For reassuring Horacio, apparently.”

Javier laughed at the thought of them engaged in something resembling a heart-to-heart. But if truth be told, it brought warmth to his chest to realise the two men could be considered friends-of-sorts these days. Not that he dared tell them that.

Steve gave a lazy salute with one hand whilst the other took a swig of his drink. “Don’t expect that to become a habit, by the way.”

And there it was, right on cue, just as Javier anticipated. “Oh, no, of course not.”

“It was a one-time-only Wedding Special kinda deal.”

“Right. Exactly.”

Javier took a long sip of his drink to hide the smirk threatening to explode into an undiplomatic laugh if he wasn’t careful.

“Any idea when you’re moving back to the States?” Steve asked, seemingly oblivious to Javier’s impressive restraint.

“Not really. It depends on Horacio’s visa. We haven’t decided on the best route yet. I’d forgotten how much fucking paperwork’s involved.”

It was no wonder Javier held such disdain for bureaucracy when the wrong piece of paper was the difference between crossing a border and not. When someone’s life was reduced down to a list of rigid criteria without much consideration for the sacrifice and hardship it often took to get to that point in the first place. It was why he had done his best to help informants get an American visa wherever possible, even if it meant bending rules until they snapped.

He knew Horacio had more options than most – more than his grandparents’ generation did – and they had been lucky with their past visas. But he tried not to think about the fact their future would be in the hands of an officious government administrator. One most likely not prepared to bend any rules in the slightest.

“You got that right. Don’t s’pose he’s thought about law enforcement?”

Javier shot Steve a sharp look. “Hilarious.”

“I thought so. And what about you? Any ideas what’s next?”

“Me? Fuck, I dunno, man. Guess I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.”

“You’ll both figure it out, y’know.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah. You always do. You’re like me and Con. We’ve had our rough patches, several of ‘em while we were here – and a few more since we left, come to think of it – but somehow, we get through it. Same as you and Horacio.”

“You drunk, Murphy?”

Steve contemplated that as though he hadn’t considered the possibility until now despite the array of empty glasses covering the table. “Fuck, I think I am.” He let out a loud snigger before hushing himself. “Don’t tell anyone.”

“My lips are sealed.” For all of Javier’s stoicism, he stood no chance, and it wasn’t long before they were giggling like schoolboys.

“About the rough patches, though…” Steve said once they had calmed down. “Any tips?”

“Someone once told me it’s okay to not always be in the same boat even if you’re in the same storm. Sometimes, you just need your own boat. But as long as you’re trying to sail in the same direction...and want to be in the same boat as much as possible, you can get through it.”

“Huh. Maybe it’s the alcohol, but that actually makes sense. Who do I need to thank?”

Javier smiled, almost able to smell fresh churros if he closed his eyes hard enough. “Someone a lot older and wiser than us.”

“Figures. And my point still stands, by the way.”

“What point’s that exactly?”

“You might not have worked out the finer details yet, but…” Steve gestured for Javier to move forward as though he was about to share highly classified intel. “The worst’s over now. We don’t forget, but we move on.” He nodded sagely before dropping his voice to little more than an alcohol-infused rumble. “This is your happy ending, Javi. Go live it.”

As they returned to the party, Steve alternating between leaning against Javier and patting him enthusiastically on the back whilst attempting something vaguely resembling Spanish, there was no doubt in Javier’s mind that Steve was wasted and probably had been for most of their conversation.

But when it came to the sentiment behind Steve’s garbled words, something told Javier that didn’t matter.

------------------------------------------------------

Maybe it was Horacio’s age or the quiet life he had become accustomed to, but he couldn’t keep up with Search Bloc’s drinking. The aguardiente shots were in full flow when he left them to it, doubling back towards where he had left Javier and Steve.

He made it past the bustle of the bar and round the corner towards a small rock garden with a walkway to the trees lying beyond.

“So, the rumours were true, then.”

Force of habit made Horacio momentarily reach for where his gun holster used to be as he spun around to face the voice from the shadows of a wooden bench.

“Depends which ones you’re talking about,” he replied in a measured tone now he knew the source of the voice. “You can’t believe everything you hear.”

“Well, let’s put it this way...you certainly look well for a dead man, Colonel Carrillo.”

“You almost sound disappointed.”

“Not at all. Vengeance isn’t my style.”

“Nor mine these days.”

“So I’ve heard. Congratulations on your retirement. I’d say that beats jail, wouldn’t you?”

Horacio scoffed as he sat on the opposite end of the bench, his brow flexing at such an expertly delivered blow. “I guess I deserved that.”

“I think we both know what a man deserves and what a man gets are rarely the same thing.”

“True. But you’ll always be Colonel Martínez: the man who stopped Escobar.”

“Perhaps so. But was death not the easier way out?”

“Easier than what? Vengeance?”

“Justice.” Martínez gave Horacio a long look from his end of the bench. “Gaviria was the one who wanted him dead. It’s no wonder you two got along so well.”

“I did my duty. As Gaviria did his and you did yours. We played the hands we were dealt.”

“Yes, and he dealt mine well when he signed my son up to Search Bloc before offering me your job.”

Realisation slowly spread across Horacio’s face, and without meaning to, he gave Martínez a look tinged with pity. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I kept him alive. He was transferred to a new intel unit instead…where he intercepted radio transmissions from Pablo the day we caught him.”

A curve of a smile formed on Horacio’s lips. “Funny how it works out sometimes.”

Horacio was reminded of his own double-edged sword of a path to becoming leader of Search Bloc. The journey began with Javier and a briefcase full of cash being deposited in the lap of General Jaramillo, forcing the General’s greedy hand to appoint Horacio as head of the anti-drug squad and make him a Colonel. A job that was already a poisoned chalice on account of his predecessor winding up dead at the hands of the cartel.

Javier using gringo money to buy Horacio a promotion had been a bone of contention between them back then. Too many heated discussions under the influence led to an argument where “Everybody works for somebody" and “Don’t ever mistake me for one of your whores again” were the last words to hang between them in a heavy fog of smoke, whiskey and undefinable tension for several weeks. During which time, Horacio was even more ruthless than usual. And as if to prove a point, Javier practically became a temporary resident at his favourite brothel.

The hypocrisy of the situation had sat uneasily under Horacio’s skin when he had always taken such a hard line on bribery from the narcos. Was this really any different?

But conversely, if he hadn’t been allowed to build his own force of incorruptible men, he would never have led the operation on Gacha. He would never have ended up in those quarters in Tolú with Javier. On his cot with Javier underneath him.

“Yes, it is. I did tell Gaviria I would bring Escobar into custody unless he resisted. But of course, he resisted.”

“Then maybe Escobar didn’t care about justice as much as you think he did. And there’s nothing you could have done about that.”

“Aren’t we supposed to care about justice, though? And I don’t mean the vigilante kind you and Los Pepes were so fond of administering.”

“You sound like the gringos I used to work with.” A surge of nostalgia rose in Horacio’s chest, and he’d have been surprised if it wasn’t showing on his face. Although, of course, it was one gringo in particular he had in mind.

“If you think I wanted Escobar to be extradited to an American jail, you’re mistaken. He was our problem to deal with, not theirs.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t give a fuck about a corrupt form of justice. How would that have been better than what I did? So many judges, politicians and journalists were bought or killed alongside our men. He wanted Colombia to bleed, and he’d have done whatever it took to make sure he didn’t remain in a cell. You, Trujillo, Search Bloc…you cauterised the wound that no one else could.”

“For now. I think we both know this was something of a Pyrrhic victory. And not the end.”

“Two things we can agree on.”

Reluctant smiles crossed their faces despite everything.

“I think our fathers managed a few more.”

“So I was told at Papá’s wake. How is your father doing these days?”

“He’s fine. Retired now but relieved the hunt is over. I think he hated watching from the sidelines.”

“I know the feeling.”

The distant drumbeat of the live band carried on the gentle breeze through the garden, whispering like ghosts through the plants and trees surrounding them.

“I may not have agreed with your methods, but I was very sorry about your father.”

“Me too. And for what it’s worth, I think my father would’ve been sorry about my methods as well.”

“I cannot imagine how losing a parent so young would have changed my path. And to be clear, this isn't to be taken as an excuse, but by your own ethos, you played the cards you were dealt, did you not?”

Horacio laughed. “Something like that.”

“I must admit, you were a tough act to follow.”

“Was I?”

“Yes. The level of respect you commanded from your men wasn’t easy to replicate.”

“You still got invited here, though.”

“True. And I accepted the invite despite my suspicions the groom was assisting Agent Peña before his departure.”

Horacio’s jaw ticked in anticipation of the treacherous tightrope he would need to tread here. He and Javier were out, done, without their badges or weapons. But Trujillo wasn’t.

“Suspicions or evidence?” he settled on in the end.

“Suspicions based on what I witnessed. But I think there’s irrefutable evidence his and Peña’s unfaltering loyalty rested with you rather than with me.”

“Trujillo also fired a bullet through Escobar’s skull.”

“Yes. An act I don’t judge him for in the circumstances. And rest assured, I have no intention of reporting my suspicions to anyone. Major Trujillo’s motives aren’t the ones still eluding me.”

Horacio swallowed down the dread burning the back of his throat like bile that was in danger of choking him if he didn’t get rid of it quickly. “What are you talking about?”

“You never struck me as a man afraid of death. And whilst I can understand the ambush might have made some reconsider their career choice, I wouldn’t have put you down as one of them.”

“Do you really think there was anything left for me in Search Bloc? My superiors already had your name on their lips to replace me long before I was shot.”

“In Search Bloc, perhaps not. But I’m sure the CNP would have allowed you back once the dust settled. They forgave you for far worse than being shot.”

Horacio huffed sarcastically despite how unwise it was to get sucked into the conversation. “I can assure you my decision was never about them. And it’s nothing you didn’t do for your son.”

That seemed to be the winning blow as Martínez nodded in concession. “True. We can’t afford to be afraid of death in our profession. But when it comes to the people we love, I must confess…I can’t apply the same rule.”

Horacio gripped the edge of the bench and focused intently on his feet, fearing even glancing in Martínez’s direction would fill in the few remaining blanks. He managed a minimal grunting noise in his throat that he hoped sounded like agreement.

“However, many times, I’ve asked myself why a man such as Peña would have destroyed his career so recklessly, and so close to the finish line. But I’ve been unable to settle on an answer.”

It wasn’t quite the change of subject Horacio hoped for. “Well, for starters,” he began, raising his gaze from his shoes at last, not out of a newly acquired sense of bravery but because he knew he needed to be convincing. “I wouldn’t read too much into Judy Moncada’s Get Out Of Jail Free Card.”

“Oh, I didn’t. I know Peña’s role was only a small part of something a lot bigger than he, you or I could control. But I have to wonder what leverage they had over him to make a deal with the devil impossible to refuse.”

Horacio had no intention of engaging further, but it wasn’t the first time he had wondered about the gap he left that was hastily – and bloodily – filled by Los Pepes. Would they even have been necessary if he'd never left? Or would they have tried their luck in approaching him with the offer of an allegiance? It caused his stomach to swoop if he focused too much on the people involved in that hypothetical scenario. But then he thought of Javier, and he knew with every fibre of his being if their roles had been reversed, he would have done the same.

“I’m sure every man has his reasons if the price is high enough.”

Martínez cocked his head in Horacio’s direction with a creased brow, holding eye contact for a fraction longer than Horacio was comfortable with. “Quite.”

Drunken laughter followed by a sniggered hush abruptly cut through the loud silence. The two Colonels – past and present – turned around to be met with the sight of Javier trying to control the swaying bulk of limbs belonging to his former partner.

Javier spotted them first and halted in his tracks, hoping the dim lighting hid the flash of horror on his face at the sight of two parallel universes colliding in front of him on a garden bench.

Steve apparently was oblivious to what they had stumbled across as he carried on along the path back to the party with just about enough of his faculties remaining to reunite with Connie.

“Everything alright?” Javier asked, fingers twitching on his right hand as he looked from one side of the bench to the other, then back again.

“Yeah, fine.” But Horacio’s eyes found Javier’s in the flecks of light from the lanterns hanging amongst the tree branches and told a more complicated story. “We were just comparing notes.”

“Oh yeah? Any interesting findings?” Javier’s eyes stayed fixed on Horacio’s or the floor for the most part, only risking a brief glance or two at Martínez.

“A few,” Martínez chipped in as he studied them more carefully than they were likely aware of. “Some that I will never be able to excuse or forgive, but I think I understand one thing more clearly now.”

“What’s that?” Horacio asked.

“I always believed there were two types of people in this world: those who rely on hope and those who rely on faith. But now, I see some rely on both.”

Before Javier or Horacio could formulate a response, Martínez announced it was time to locate his son as they had early shifts in the morning.

Their farewell involved little more than a handshake, a stern nod and an exchange of “Good luck.” But it was a necessary formality for all parties. A mark of mutual respect that wasn’t quite an offered or accepted olive branch but at least a truce. And that was enough.

------------------------------------------------------

“You okay?” Javier asked once Martínez had disappeared from view.

“Yeah. Well, I guess it was inevitable at some point.”

“Didn’t expect it to go like that, though. What the fuck did he mean? Just before he left. Does he know?”

“Maybe. Maybe not. I don’t think he’s telling anyone anything either way.”

“Agreed. We don’t have to stay if you’d rather -”

“No.” Horacio was quiet for a second, craning his ear towards the sound of the band behind the large cluster of trees they had sat amongst earlier. “I’ve got a better idea.”

He looked around them in all directions, twice, to be on the safe side, then took Javier by the hand and escorted him along one of the walkways. However, they branched off in a different direction than before, Horacio surprising himself with childhood memories of the layout of this place that he assumed were lost to the sands of time.

“What are -?”

“You’ll see.”

The path spiralled in circles, leaving them surrounded by greenery until they arrived at a softly lit water fountain in the centre. They were somehow closer to the sound of the music, even though they had moved further away from the party.

As they stilled, Javier looked expectantly at Horacio, who was already removing his jacket, placing it carefully on the ground and rolling up his shirt sleeves.

Javier did the same, still not understanding what this was all about, but the look in Horacio’s eye made him want to find out.

Horacio stepped closer, moonlight casting reflections from the fountain, illuminating the spark of hunger glinting in his pupils. “I’ve spent all night watching you dance with half the wedding party.” One hand dropped to Javier’s waist and tugged him forward into his hold. “It’s my turn now.”

Javier’s breath hitched as Horacio pressed them together, his hands automatically falling to Horacio’s hips to steady himself. “You only had to ask,” he said, the smoky timbre of his voice vibrating against Horacio’s ear.

“I thought line-dancing was more your thing.”

Javier nipped at Horacio’s earlobe in revenge. “That was when I was a kid. And you weren’t complaining about my dancing skills on our anniversary.”

Horacio let out an agreeable sigh as he chased the scrape of Javier’s teeth. “No, I wasn’t. But as nice as that was, we were hardly moving.”

“True. And if you must know, the Texas Two-Step got me several phone numbers back in the day. Lorraine’s being one of them. She was more into it than me, but it was actually kinda fun…for a while anyway.”

Memories of Saturday nights spent at old Texan dance halls and barn dances suddenly filled Javier’s mind. The faded aroma of leather and iron rust lingered alongside stale Lone Star beer, cigarette smoke and overpowering perfume as he led his partner across the worn wooden floor in time to the likes of Laura Canales and Hank Locklin.

His gaze would travel around the room – which was easier during a do-si-do – sometimes to make sure they didn’t collide with other dancers, sometimes to give anyone who caught his eye a discreet once-over. If he happened to hone in on a male dancer's tight-fitted jeans and fluid hip movements, it could easily be disguised as admiration for his female partner.

Not that it ever led to any encounters. Not there anyway; it wasn’t anonymous enough. But it was still a temptation. And yet another instance of feeling caught between two worlds: to have the tangible heat and beauty of a woman in his arms whilst fantasising about a mysterious, alluring man from afar, knowing he could never do the same with him in front of an audience.

“Juliana taught me to dance too. Or tried to, at least. She competed a lot when she was younger.”

Horacio smiled at the unexpected memory of them practising in her parents' kitchen, her father watching them like a hawk, glaring every time Horacio put a foot wrong or his hands fell lower than her waist despite the fact she was a grown woman. And his hands had already done much more than that whenever they had the place to themselves. His relationship with her father was the polar opposite of his relationship with Chucho, now he thought about it.

It wasn’t Juliana’s fault, though. And when they were alone on a crowded dancefloor, before his job and life came between them, before he understood the strange, borderline resentment twisting in his chest if he clocked male dancers with a particular look or build, they were content.

One of their favourite clubs ran a cumbia contest on the first Saturday of each month. The prize was tokenistic, free drinks on their next visit, but that didn’t matter on the occasions they came first when Juliana would tell her parents the good news at church the following day. The look on her father’s face as Horacio tried and failed to stifle a smug expression at her side would always be priceless.

“You ever danced any cumbia?” he asked Javier now.

“Some. At parties, weddings, quinceañeras…but that’s going back before I came to Colombia.” There might have been a few hazy nights in clubs and bars over here as well, but dancing hadn’t been his modus operandi in those days.

“So, you’ve never done it with a Colombian?”

Javier’s brow quirked of its own accord, and his tongue swept deliberately across his top lip. “No, er, you’d be my first.”

Horacio kept an impassive expression with his mouth, but his darkening pupils gave him away. “Don’t worry, I’ll be gentle.”

“You know that won’t be necessary.”

Somewhere in the middle of their flirtation, they loosened their embrace, one hand linked in the space between them as their feet stepped back and forth, then side to side, their movements mirroring one another. Quick, quick, slow, quick, quick, slow.

Without warning, Horacio pulled Javier across his body and under their arms, spinning him around with force, then bringing them face-to-face again.

“Lucho Bermúdez was one of the great musical legends here in Colombia. Still is after his death last year. Mamá and my Abuelas listened to him all the time whenever the whole family got together. Do you know the name of this song?”

Horacio waited until their noses were almost touching to ask as their feet subconsciously glided over the paving stones beneath them.

Javier merely shook his head, their legs intermittently brushing together as their hips popped to the beat before he was spun once, twice, thrice until he was dizzy and out of breath.

“Tolú,” Horacio whispered as they reconverged, his lips skimming Javier’s and his eyes flickering shut as flashes of them on his cot in their shadowed quarters flooded into view.

Javier teased his bottom lip over Horacio’s, moustache swiping back and forth until they shuddered, a different first time as fresh as if it happened yesterday.

But they never stopped dancing. Horacio looped through their arms until he had his back to Javier, one hand each gripped at Horacio’s waist. They shimmied sideways, their free hands entwined by their shoulders to guide them back and forth, switching their hold each time they travelled across the floor. Another spin, another brush of legs, or an electric look making it clear which memories of Tolú they were thinking of.

The song ended, leaving only their charged breaths and the evening breeze rustling through the maze of trees protecting them from prying eyes.

Then, the band struck up again, so they kept dancing. Their bodies and minds synchronised as they paid homage to the country that had brought them together in the unlikeliest circumstances, Horacio interjecting with memories from childhood whenever old classics were played. He was even forced to swear on the cross between their chests that he had nothing to do with the band playing Noches de Cartagena of all songs.

------------------------------------------------------

By the time Javier prised his eyes open, unwelcome rays were already bursting through any gap in the blinds they could find. He craned his neck above Horacio’s still form, his watch on the nightstand reading 8:45am; ouch.

He’d survived on minimal sleep plenty of times, but he couldn’t remember getting home from a wedding past 5:00am before. If he was honest, they were tempted to call it a night once their private party for two ended. But it would have been rude to miss out on the dancers – professional this time – costumes and confetti of La Hora Loca. When in Colombia and all that.

They still had a few hours before they were to reconvene with the wedding party for the ultimate hangover cure of bandeja paisa, so Javier’s nose and moustache brushed over the nape of Horacio’s neck, arms slotting around him from behind.

A serene purr soon followed as Horacio stirred and leaned into Javier’s touch.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.”

Javier’s lips now worked their way to the side of Horacio’s neck, concentrating on a sweet spot below his ear.

“Liar.” Although Horacio’s whole body arched and his head tilted to give Javier what he wanted.

“Surprised I was awake before you, to be honest.”

“It took me a while to get to sleep…all of two and a bit hours ago.” Horacio winced into the pillow at how little rest he’d actually had.

“Everything okay?”

“Hmm, yeah.” He raised his head and shifted so he was lying face-to-face with Javier. “I was just thinking about my family.”

“Makes sense.”

“When we arrived, we were so focused on the wedding. I didn’t let myself think about what comes next. But now…”

“I said the same to Connie last night. But…maybe we’re ready to rip off the band-aid.”

“Maybe. Part of me just wanted to get it out of the way when I was lying awake. But you nodded off in record time.”

“I think you wore me out.”

“But you enjoyed it, though?”

“It was perfect.” Javier closed the space between them, seeking out Horacio’s lips until he was met with a hum of agreement.

Javier pushed his luck, ducking below Horacio’s ear and descending over the column of his throat. Testing the waters to see if Horacio wanted the distraction Javier was more than willing to provide. “And how’s this?”

“Pretty fucking perfect too.”

Their kisses started languorous due to their lack of sleep, building to something fervid as Horacio nipped at Javier’s pout, catching it between his teeth until it was plump and swollen.

Javier retaliated, coaxing Horacio’s tongue towards his with expert flicks, tasting faint traces of last night’s cigars, until he captured it and sucked, long and thorough.

Limbs tangled between bedsheets soon became Javier whimpering facedown into a pillow whilst Horacio dipped and devoured, creating a slick glide between Javier’s thighs, the relief visceral when lining up and pushing forwards.

Horacio experimented with bracing yet measured rotations as he mouthed along the expanse of Javier’s trapezius, lost in a sea of broad muscle. He’d always loved watching the fabric of Javier’s shirts stretch and strain at his upper back, an eye-catching contrast to the narrow hips his jeans hugged oh so tightly. And now, the shirt wasn’t required, and he was the one setting Javier’s skin alight, triggering a visible response to every touch or movement like putty in Horacio’s hands.

Javier loved being vindicated that there was nothing wrong with Horacio’s hips whatsoever. Of being denied any forewarning of what came next from biting down on a pillow with his eyes screwed shut, the only way he could avoid prematurely spilling all over the sheets beneath him. It was a close call several times, calming breaths required to refocus, a request for Horacio to stop or slow down needed before it was game over.

Knowing he reduced Javier to begging because it was too much put Horacio on thin ice, and any more pleas like that would have finished him off. But the throbbing of his cock was in sync with his pulse, loud and insistent, and keeping still wasn’t having the same effect anymore. The salty taste on his tongue as it swiped over the nape of Javier’s neck where the silver chain still remained was an aphrodisiac he couldn’t ignore.

“Fuck me,” he rasped against Javier’s ear.

Without hesitation, Javier flipped onto his back, the loss of contact causing an ache of frustration. But it was replaced by straddling, groping and grinding, propelling Horacio up the mattress until his thighs were encased around Javier’s head.

Now it was Javier’s turn to feast, spreading Horacio with vigour, darting, licking, kissing, leaving trails of saliva, moaning as his cock was engulfed and fingers danced over his balls.

The scratch of nails scored Horacio’s ass as he worked Javier over, lapping with greed, hollowing his cheeks, bobbing his head and switching up the strength of suction, putting everything they had learnt in Madrid into practice.

They pulled off before it was too late, grabbing the bottle of lube and lying supine across the mattress with Javier underneath Horacio.

Javier’s feet were planted flat on the bed, giving him enough purchase to buck upwards with force, one hand holding on at the waist whilst the other roamed freely across the plains of Horacio’s chest, kneading fistfuls of pectoral muscles and skimming over his rib cage down to his thighs.

Javier caressed each thigh in turn, circling and massaging with his thumb, marvelling at how the span of his hand only reached a fraction of the way around them. “I meant what I said last night. About how good a garter would look on you.” His glutes clenched as he propelled upwards for extra emphasis.

The seed was sewn in Javier’s head as he watched Horacio dress for the wedding. It wasn’t the first time Horacio had worn what was a standard part of his dress uniform. A trick of the trade amongst police and military to avoid sanctions for a creased shirt. But it was the first time Javier had seen the shirt stays sitting snugly around Horacio’s muscular thighs. It was the first time he wanted to slip his fingers underneath the neat straps, maybe twang them or pull them tighter with his teeth whilst on his knees. Or as Horacio rode him with his back to Javier, one side of his shirt unclipped, underwear and a single garter tantalisingly removed, the other kept secured in place.

A guttural groan rumbled through Horacio’s chest like he had read Javier’s mind. “What kind?” he breathed out, surprised by his eagerness to indulge Javier and how fast his hand shot to his cock.

Javier choked back expletives at Horacio’s question and the sight above him. “I was thinking something leather…with a buckle…to match your belt and boots.” Each punishing thrust broke up his speech with strained grunts as he spread Horacio’s thighs wider, manoeuvring him up and down at the same pace. “Maybe one on your arm too….and a harness…to go with your hat…cowboy.”

“Fuck,” Horacio panted into Javier’s mouth at an awkward angle on the pillow, stroking himself roughly. Sparks of arousal multiplied with each wrist jerk as he pictured the look Javier gave him during the belt contest. Imagined him buckling the firm yet supple material until it bound tightly against Horacio’s sensitive skin like armour only they were allowed to put on or take off.

Javier’s hand replaced Horacio’s as he let his cock be held in stasis, basking in the heat and comfort of their joined form. His fingers journeyed back to Horacio’s mouth, tracing over it until Horacio parted his lips for Javier to feed two, then three digits inside.

Horacio sucked down, tasting himself as well as Javier as he swirled and licked, swallowing past the knuckles; faster and greedier. But it wasn’t enough.

Maybe it was the false pretences kept up the previous day and night combined with what lay ahead, but Javier seemed too far away. He always did when they were in public, but even more so when wearing a three-piece suit at a romantic wedding that wasn’t and couldn’t be theirs. It was why they still relished the time they could spend alone. And why they had needed Madrid. Because all those hidden looks and blink-and-miss, ‘accidental’ unseen brushes of hands could only be suppressed for so long. Last night, it had spilt out as inadvertent foreplay. But now, they needed more.

“Turn around,” Horacio said after releasing Javier’s glistening fingers.

They lay heart-to-heart, Horacio on his back, legs wrapped around Javier. Javier’s tongue skimmed across the breadth of Horacio’s chest, taking his sweet time working over each nipple, the scrape of teeth causing Horacio to lift upwards until Javier plunged him back down again.

And Horacio didn’t resist, his mind and body in free flight as the weight of Javier anchored him, allowed him to feel each and every nerve vibrate, his arms sliding above his head in complete surrender, offering them for Javier to claim.

Javier plotted a course across any patch of bare skin he could reach, licking up and down Horacio’s underarms, inhaling the musky scent of sweat before switching to his triceps, then biceps. On the left, he mouthed his way along the muscles; any marks left intentional reassurances and promises for their present and future, their bodies mapped stories of their lives.

Along the right, he eased up when he came to the faded scar at the mid-point of Horacio’s shoulder, placing tender butterfly kisses over the blemished skin, blinking away visions of a bullet tearing it open and taking care not to let his teeth make unwanted contact with their past.

He gradually dragged his mouth away until their gaze met, the rise and fall of Horacio’s chest compelling Javier to lay his head on it, soothed by the steady beat and the massage at his scalp.

Satisfied, Javier lifted Horacio’s arms back above them, sweeping over the peaks and troughs of fortified shoulders, forearms and wrists until they slotted through fingers that clamped around his like a vice.

Javier rocked in a pounding rhythm, Horacio’s legs rising higher, pushing Javier deeper as compensation for being unable to reach out and touch. Horacio honed in on the lifeline at his fingertips, the stimulation against his prostate and the safety of Javier’s forehead, all thoughts about the upcoming days put on hold.

But Javier could sense Horacio needed more again. It was written all over the beautiful agony of his face and the silent request in his eyes.

So, hands unlocked to let fingernails brand skin, tug at damp strands of hair and graze over stubble, the metallic ice of the cross contrasting with the fire burning in the core of their chests as they danced more synchronised steps only they knew.

A change in angle caused a slow build of release to skirt the edges of Horacio’s limbs, toes curling as jolts of pleasure transformed into overflowing currents. The fuse was lit, a chain reaction of heat stoking a fire in the pit of his abdomen on the cusp of burning him from the inside out.

Another snap of hips, his own hand jerking his cock in a frenzy, a rush of white noise, shuddering, shaking breaths and a release of molten bliss across their stomachs.

The ripples kept coming as every sound, quiver or fluttering around Javier’s cock pushed him closer to the edge. With one final thrust, he finished inside Horacio, a desperate growl tearing from his throat, the brunt absorbed by Horacio’s left shoulder.

They didn’t move, preferring spent velvet kisses, the world now in slow motion.

Javier concentrated on Horacio’s nose and forehead, pouring everything into each gesture of affection until he whispered, “I love you. And it’ll be okay. We’ll be okay.”

“I love you too. And I know.”

------------------------------------------------------

They dozed a little too long after wearing each other out for the second time in 24 hours, so Horacio went ahead first, leaving Javier to shower and join him afterwards. But it made little difference to the proceedings as plenty of other guests were slow off the mark, too.

Tables were laid out around the nearby restaurant owned by Juana’s parents, leftover flower arrangements used as decorations because it would have been a shame to waste them. It was a much smaller space than the botanical gardens, but not all guests from the night before were expected to attend. A fact that brought immense relief to Horacio because he wouldn’t have to make conversation with a certain Colonel again.

Whilst waiting for Javier, he worked his way through his belated first coffee of the day and took a bite out of an arepa.

“Is there room for two more?”

Horacio raised his head to find Connie with Olivia in tow. “Of course.”

Connie did her best to encourage Olivia out of her hiding place behind her legs. “Come on, sweetie. Do you want something to eat?”

Olivia peeped out from behind Connie, eyeing Horacio with suspicion.

“Don’t mind her; she’s just a little shy and overtired this morning.”

“Some arepas are going spare if that helps?” Horacio kept his voice low and gentle, peering around Connie until he drew a curious expression out of Olivia.

Olivia looked up at her mother, who nodded for reassurance.

“Go ahead.”

Olivia left her hiding place and took the chair between Horacio and Connie, mumbling a thank you as she ate.

“Help yourself, too.”

“Oh, no, thanks. I’ll wait for Steve, whose painkillers should hopefully be kicking in about now. I don’t feel too bad, but I left him groaning into his pillow. Were you and Javi in the same state this morning?”

Horacio fought down a smirk with every strength of his being. “Something like that.”

“I knew it was a smart move to travel to Cartagena tomorrow instead.”

“Where are you staying?”

“A resort just off La Boquilla beach. Steve and I would’ve preferred something quieter, but there’s more to keep kids busy where we’re at.”

“I don’t know the area well, but it is a nice coast up there. With plenty more arepas.” Horacio directed his last sentence at Olivia, who had already made a start on her second.

She slowed her chewing before smiling at Horacio, who had remembered a trick or two from the younger days of dealing with his nieces and nephews. If all else failed, food usually won them round.

“I’ve only seen Medellín and Bogotá, so it’ll be nice to get out of the big cities for a change.”

Horacio cleared his throat and took a long sip of his drink. “Yeah, it will.”

Connie leaned across the table to retrieve a freshly replenished pot of coffee and poured into her cup. “It’s a shame we won’t get a chance to see Manizales this time. But we’ll be thinking about it anyway.”

Horacio was startled out of his own coffee and met Connie’s eye, unsure how to respond before settling on a silent nod of thanks. “Maybe next time if all goes well.”

“I think we’d like that. Breaks like this are few and far between now we’re both back working.”

“How’s Miami these days?”

“Busy now we’re juggling our schedules with Liv’s. And we still have bad days sometimes, of course.” Connie gave Horacio a pointed look when talking of bad days, choosing her words carefully with Olivia in earshot. “But things are better now we’ve got more routine again…more stability.”

“Sounds familiar. I find being in the same country helps, too,” Horacio added with a wry smile.

“Exactly. Now we’re out the other side.”

“Yeah.”

They shared a knowing look, not wanting to say too much in front of Olivia about everything they had been through. It was hard to believe how much had happened and changed in the last few years, and it was clear everyone was still processing it all.

“How’s your arm doing now?” Connie asked in a hurry, keeping the mood light for the sake of her daughter.

“It’s as good as new. Well, almost. The ranch kept me moving. I think I built back more muscle than I had before. And I kept up strengthening exercises in Madrid.”

“Wow, you’re doing better than most of my patients. I never had to tell you off once.”

“I don’t follow many orders, but it wasn’t worth my arm – or life – to ignore yours. So, thank you.”

“Try telling that to Steve...or this one here. But seriously, I’m just glad I could help. Especially when I hear you might be making ranch life more permanent?” There was a conspiratorial tone to her question. A question she clearly knew the answer to already but was having fun asking regardless.

“That’s the plan, hopefully. Madrid was always supposed to be temporary.”

“But it helped?”

“Yeah. It was exactly what we needed. And maybe you’ll find Cartagena is what you need.”

“I think we will.”

There was that look again, one that spoke volumes about their shared understanding, even if their experiences were different.

Horacio’s gaze drifted up to Javier, who still wore his aviators until he flopped down at their table, already reaching for a cup and the coffee pot.

“Morning.”

“Afternoon, Javi,” Connie greeted with a wink.

“Very funny. But looks like I still beat your husband.”

“Don’t suppose you saw him on your way over?”

“Nope. I’m sure he’ll appear once the food does.”

Javier was right, of course. A worse-for-wear Steve arrived as the bandeja paisa was brought to the tables before they tucked into huge hot trays of beans, rice, chicharrón, chorizo, carne en polvo, plantain, avocado, fried egg and more arepas.

They ate in comfortable silence, letting the food work its magic and fill them up for the rest of the day, highlights from the reception still fresh in everyone’s minds despite their current weariness.

Before long, it was time to wave the newlyweds off on their honeymoon to Bequia. Their goodbyes were short and sweet, knowing they would be keeping in touch long after the celebrations were over, especially when Trujillo’s parting words were, “I’ll be waiting for my ranch invitation in the post.”

And even through the loud crowd of well-wishers, he managed to hear the mumbled “Cheeky fucker” echoed back at him in unison.

------------------------------------------------------

Javier and Horacio stayed to finish their coffees once the beeps of the wedding car disappeared into the distance, the majority of the party now dispersed and leaving them sat alone.

“Pops rang just before I left the hotel. Think he wanted to check in before…well, y’know.”

“Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, fine. The only bit of news he asked me to pass on was about him being offered first refusal on Ciro’s and Malena’s place.”

The fact the Ortegas were selling up wasn’t a surprise. Javier and Horacio had spent last Christmas in Laredo again, where Ciro and Malena had brought around a fresh batch of sopaipillas over the festive period. In the preceding months, they had gone back and forth on moving, but by December, they were set on putting the farm on the market in the New Year.

Horacio nodded slowly, his brow drawn tight across his forehead as he considered this new development carefully. “Makes sense.”

“Do you think he’ll seriously consider it at his age?”

“I think he has to. We buy the majority of our feed grain from them. Selling to an outsider could risk price hikes and shortages, or the new owners might want to supply to someone else. It’d be a big gamble. But if your father bought them out, then kept their staff on, used their expertise, maybe even increased the livestock with some of the extra land…I think it could be workable.”

Horacio was aware he was being watched and glanced up to face his audience. “What?”

“Nothing.” Although Javier knew his face told another story. “I just don’t think I’ve ever heard you speak such fluent cowboy before.”

“I’m not a—”

“Not yet,” Javier finished for him. “And I never said it was a bad thing.”

------------------------------------------------------

After every funeral, an additional service was held exclusively for CNP officers to attend. Whilst gravestones were located across Colombia in countless cemeteries, a modest wooden cross bearing a name was planted for each loss in the consecrated soil around the corner from Carlos Holguín.

Horacio had paid his respects here more times than he wished to remember, but he still wasn’t prepared for how vast the sea of the dead had become since his last visit. It was a silent expanse covering the grass for as far as the eye could see, the sole sign of life the weeds and wildflowers shooting up between the rows he walked through.

He recognised some names and could clearly picture their ashen-faced relatives as though it was yesterday when he stood on their doorsteps, hat in hand and solemn expression fixed in place. Others were indistinguishable from the rest. An indicator of the extent of the collateral damage and how long he had been away now.

As he stood in his civilian clothes, he felt strangely underdressed. But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to wear his usual ranch attire since being back in Colombia and had returned to the beige khakis and polo shirts that felt like an unofficial uniform of their own. One that allowed him to get away with wholly unofficial business in the past, but today wasn’t about him. Today was about them. All of them. No matter who they were.

Perhaps against his better judgement, with the help of Trujillo, he had located the graves of Diana Turbay and Carolina García Velásquez. He didn't allow himself to remember Carolina’s name at the time, even though she had been plastered all over the papers alongside mysterious references to an “unidentified officer of the National Police” leading the raid on La Dispensaria. A story eerily repeated with Diana’s death.

He didn’t linger at their gravesides. But on those occasions, just like this one, Horacio bowed his head, recited a silent prayer and made the sign of the cross.

“Lo siento,” were the only words spoken before he retreated from the churchyard.

He had done all he could here for now, and it was time to…not forget but to move on. It was time to face his fears and look to the future. It was time to let old ghosts rest once and for all.

#Narcos fic #Narcos #Javier Peña #Horacio Carrillo #Carrillo #Horacio Carrillo x Javier Peña #Javier Peña x Horacio Carrillo #Pedro Pascal #Maurice Compte #Narcos fanfic #Narcos fanfiction #Narcos fan fic #My Fan Fic #My Narcos Fic

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mysecretlittlelibrary · 2 years ago

Text

Just Let Me Adore You Pt. 8

Pairing: Stucky x Reader

Word Count: 3.7k

Warnings: none actually this is pretty cute they just go on a date lol

Genre: Pretty much ALL fluff, it's cute

Summary: You’ve been dating your boyfriend, Bruce, for 3 absolutely blissful years. He’s a scientist and professor who is as smart as he is kind and if anyone asked, you were sure you’d spend the rest of your life with him. That is until two mysteriously charming men that Bruce swears are dangerous take an interest in you that threatens to turn your entire life upside down. I mean… what exactly are you supposed to do with two gorgeous men telling you something that suggests that basically everything you think you know is a lie? And why does part of you have enough doubt to wonder if they might be telling the truth?

Series Masterlist

***

You watch curiously as Wanda shuffles through one of the boxes sitting around the guest room in her apartment. Even though you've been here a few weeks you're avoiding fully unpacking your things since you snuck them out of your and Bruce's previously shared apartment.

"You should really unpack this stuff like how do you find anything if it's all in boxes?" Wanda huffs.

"All the important stuff is unpacked. I didn't really expect to be going on dates. I mean at this point it's a good thing I even managed to go back to the apartment and get the rest of my life from my old place." You shrug. "I dunno if I should bother because like- it's not at if I'm moving in permanently."

"You could! I mean I have the extra bedroom, it's yours if you want it, you're already here. Why not?"

"We'll- talk about it later."

"OH! Where's the dress they bought you?! It's not like you could wear it with Bruce I'm sure. You could break it in now!" She says.

"It's in the other box." You point to where the dress should be and Wanda quickly pulls it out. The dress is a red floor-length off-shoulder number that looks as good now as it did when you saw it in the store. "I can't believe they bought me a dress because they liked my voice." You shake your head.

"I mean the dress is gorgeous. Put it on we have less than an hour before they're meant to arrive and you still have to decide on makeup and shoes and accessories." Wanda hands you the dress and you laugh at her frantic list as you take off your tank top and shorts to put on the dress.

"I need a different bra." You mutter.

"Do you have strapless bras?" She asks.

"Yeah I've got one- I actually hate it but I do have one." You say. You shuffle through a box until you find the bra and switch out your loungewear bra for the strapless. You shimmy on the dress and turn for Wanda to look at it. "Well? What do you think?"

"You know, exactly what looks good on you." She says with a nod.

"Lucky me since I didn't try it on before Bucky and Steve decided to purchase it." You muse.

"Okay, makeup. Do you wanna keep it simple and dramatize with accessories or go with dramatic makeup and keep the accessories simple?"

"I dunno I really like dramatic makeup." You hum throwing a t-shirt over the dress to do your makeup.

"So do dramatic makeup. We can give you a cute pair of earrings and one of those dainty necklaces of yours." She shrugs.

"The sun."

"What?"

"They gave me a sun necklace. Would it be too much to wear that and the dress they gave me? Too definitive on where we stand even though I have no idea how I feel about them?"

"Well it's gold, you'd have to match it with- wait what bag are you carrying?"

"I was gonna go with a black clutch."

"Is it black and gold or black and silver?"

"I have both."

"Well you have to go with the gold one."

"Okay." You laugh.

"Shoes? What shoes?"

"You can pick." You tell her.

"Are all your shoes in the closet?"

"Yes, those I unpacked." You tell her.

"Black heels. That way something in your outfit matches your bag." Wanda holds the shoes in question up. This particular pair of heels has gold detailing on the stiletto, a gift from your mother a couple of years ago.

"Perfect." You tell her. You finish your makeup and slide the shoes on. Your final makeup look is gold eyes and a red lip that matches your dress. You complete your look with the sun necklace and a pair of simple gold hoops.

"You look amazing!" Wanda gushes when you look over at her for a final assessment.

"Well, that's good since it's five after. They should be downstairs already." You say loading your clutch.

"I'll go down with you so I can let them know that if they mess this up I'll have their heads." Wanda says following you out of your room.

"These are mobsters Wanda please remember that before you threaten them."

"What they are is men taking my best friend out. Mobster or not I expect them to treat you perfectly and they should know there will be consequences if they don't."

"Do you intend to tell them you're a witch?" You ask her.

"Absolutely not. Then I lose the mystery factor that makes my threats that much scarier." She shakes her head and you laugh. When you exit the apartment building a man exits the vehicle parked right at the front and walks over to you.

"Miss y/n. Miss Wanda."

"Do we know you?" Wanda quirks an eyebrow at him.

"I'm Mr. Rogers and Mr. Barnes' driver. They're waiting in the car." The man explains leading you both over and opening the door. Steve gets out of the car to allow you to slide in between him and Bucky.

"Y/n, you look gorgeous." Steve kisses your hand and helps you into the car. Well, it's actually a truck, with tinted windows and spacious seats even with three of you in the back.

"Thank you Steve, hello Bucky." You say. When Steve settles back into his seat, Wanda sticks her head into the car before the driver can close the door.

"Gentlemen. Hello." Wanda smiles and you roll your eyes at her.

"Hello Wanda." They say in unison.

"I just want to make sure they we're all on the same page here. If y/n comes home with anything negative to say about this evening I will put you both in so much pain you won't even be able to scream. Are we clear?"

"We have no intention of seeing anything but happiness on y/n's face tonight Wanda, don't worry." Steve says kindly.

"Good. I will be holding you to that. Y/n, have a good night okay?"

"Thank you Wanda. I'll see you when I get back." You say. The driver waits for her to back up and then shuts the door before getting into the car.

"You look amazing y/n." Bucky says.

"Thank you Bucky." You nod. "Where are we going tonight?" You look between the two men.

"If it's okay with you we'd like to keep it a surprise." Steve says.

"Alright sure. I did give you permission to pick the place." You nod. You watch the streets of New York go by as you're driven through the city until eventually the car stops and the door is opened for you. Steve exits and holds a hand out to you to help you down from the car and then Bucky climbs out after you. Steve keeps his hand in yours and Bucky places one of his at the small of your back as the three of you enter one of the fanciest restaurants you've ever seen. Steve talks to the maitre d but you don't hear what he says, you're too busy looking around at the ornate interior of the place. Everyone in here is dressed to the nines, and despite knowing your outfit matches the environment, part of you feels out of place with the clientele of this place. You're all led to your table in a more secluded area of the restaurant. "This place is- very fancy." You say once you're seated and left alone by the maitre d.

"Are you uncomfortable? We can leave if you'd like." Bucky's voice is soft as he makes the offer.

"No, I'm fine. It was just an observation. I'll admit this isn't my usual scene but I am okay here. Thank you for checking though." You say.

"So this is one of those places that has a set menu, and they just bring out the courses for you once you've sat down. We thought it'd be simpler this way." Steve says.

"Oh okay. That's cool." You say. Just then a waiter brings your first course, a seafood tartlet.

"How have you been handling the new information y/n?" Steve asks.

"Which piece of new information are you referring to? Being a werewolf, my boyfriend lying to me for at least a year, you two being total stalkers, or the fact that your infatuation with me is totally out of your control?" You ask.

"All of it really. Whichever you want to talk about." Steve shrugs.

"Well, the werewolf thing is- somehow the least shocking bit of all of this honestly. That was pretty easy to accept, it didn't inherently change much for me, plus my mom has been pretty open to talking about it all so I at least have help navigating it."

"And- things with the hunter?" Bucky asks.

"I've moved all my stuff out of the apartment so as far as I'm concerned I'm done with him." You say.

"Can I ask what happened? How you, found out that we were right?" Steve asks. Your first course plates are then replaced with the entree which you miss the name of when it's brought but you enjoy the dish anyway.

"I called my mom about the werewolf thing and when I brought that up to him I just asked him if he knew and I could tell he was lying when he said no." You shrug. "It turned into a big dramatic blowout but the details aren't important really. He lied so I left. That's the moral of the story."

"I'm sorry. That kind of betrayal can't be easy to deal with, and if you ever want to talk about it more we can lend an ear." Steve says.

"It is what it is, you live and you learn." You say.

"Just say the word and you'll never have to see him again." Bucky says.

"Hm that- sounds like a threat on his life." You muse and Bucky simply shrugs. "Is that just how it goes with mobsters?"

"When necessary." He says casually.

"Interesting. I have an unrelated question though, that I've been wondering about all week."

"What's that?" Steve asks.

"If this... werewolf infatuation with me, however it all works, is affecting both of you... am I expected to make a choice at some point here? Between the two of you, I mean."

"No. You don't have to." Bucky says.

"I don't have to? You'd be able to handle that kind of dynamic? Where I just, date both of you indefinitely or, permanently? Because if you're gonna like kill each other over this I don't want anything to do with either of you. I have no interest in being the subject of some sort of contest."

"We've done it before." Steve says.

"Oh so this is just normally how you date?" You ask.

"Well- it's not exactly our default no but, this isn't our first rodeo either." He chuckles.

"You don't think it'll cause problems? Not having me to yourself?" You ask curiously.

"Not at all." Steve says and you turn to Bucky who hums his agreement.

"We told you before, we share most things." Bucky says.

"Okay. Well as long as that's the truth, moving on. I know what you do for work, theoretically, so what do you do for fun?" You ask.

"Theoretically?" Steve quirks an eyebrow at you.

"I mean I've got an idea of what the whole mobster thing could entail yeah but it's not like you're gonna give me the details, are you?" You shrug.

"Do you want details?" He asks.

"We'll tell you anything you want to know." Bucky says.

"Anything? Really? You don't think I'm too innocent to know the inner workings of your crime empire?" Your question is kind of sarcastic but you are curious if they'd seriously tell you about it.

"As much as we want to protect you, we also know that if we want you to be part of our world you need to be prepared for what's in it." Steve says.

"If you choose us we want you as our equal y/n, in all things. Even our business." Bucky says placing a hand over yours.

"So- like I could be part of decision-making?" You ask, mostly to gauge how far this equal partner thing goes. Bucky and Steve glance at each other with a look you can't really interpret.

"If you want to be." Steve nods.

"It's that simple?" You ask skeptically.

"When it comes to you, things will always be as simple as if you want it, it's yours. We'll give you anything you ask of us. Always." Bucky says.

"You two are dangerously charming. Saying all the right things." You hum.

"We'll never make a promise we don't intend to keep." Steve says.

"That's easy to say now." You scoff.

"We know that hunter betrayed your trust in him, so we'll do whatever we need to, to gain your trust and we will treat it with the respect it deserves. The respect you deserve." Bucky says.

"I take it trust is very important to you? Especially with the kind of work you do." You say.

"Precisely." He nods.

"That's good to know." You hum. "So, hobbies. Do you have any or does work take up all your time?"

"We have a few hobbies. I like woodworking." Steve says.

"I like drawing and reading." Bucky says.

"We both do hunting." Steve offers.

"Like with guns or as wolves? Also is it just for sport or do you eat what you kill?"

"Why would we hunt with guns?" Bucky scoffs.

"I mean humans hunt for sport and obviously they use guns and since- I don't think we have the same dietary restrictions as like vampires I imagine there's nothing stopping you from just shooting things for fun because you can." You shrug and Steve chuckles. Your entree plates are then swapped out for a dessert, a layered slice of cake.

"We hunt as wolves. Usually, just things we can eat." Steve says.

"It's not really valuable to kill just for killing sake. We aren't monsters." Bucky offers.

"Monsters no but mobsters yes." You say and Bucky smirks.

"Hunting isn't work, it's a hobby." Steve says.

"Okay, hunting, woodworking, drawing, and reading. Anything else?"

"We- dedicate a lot of time to work. So, not really no." He shrugs.

"How do you intend to have a relationship if you're both basically married to your work?" You ask.

"We aren't married to it. We don't have much else to pour energy into yet so we dedicate our time to work but it's not the kind of thing that would take over our lives if you were in it." Steve shakes his head.

"How do you know?" You ask.

"The job hasn't always been our life." Steve says.

"And we have capable people working for us. We feel confident stepping away when we want to. There just hasn't been much worth pulling us away." Bucky says.

"Don't read into this question, I'm just trying to learn as much as I can so I make an informed decision at the end of tonight. Do you realistically believe I'd be worth pulling you away from work?"

"We already know so." Steve says immediately. Bucky pulls out a phone from his pocket and places it on the table.

"This phone only calls your security detail. They are the only ones with the number." Bucky says.

"Sorry, are you still having me followed?!" You blink at him. Your gaze snaps between the two men. "I want an answer and it better be the truth." You say when neither of them speaks.

"We don't trust your ex." Steve says.

"That is not the question I asked you." You frown.

"Not... fully." Bucky says.

"Not fully?"

"They aren't following you like before they just check in." Bucky says.

"I don't need your men to check in on me. That's ridiculous. You make it sound like I'm in danger." You say.

"We won't call them off. I know you don't like them but we have to take precautions especially because you've been seen with us. We- have enemies and we will not leave you vulnerable to them." Steve says firmly.

"I don't like this. But I also don't like being an exposed target so- I'll yield." You say crossing your arms.

"Thank you." He says quietly.

"I have one last question, and then we can call it a night." You say.

"Anything you want to know." Bucky says.

"Since you guys have been like- basically stalking me for a few months is there anything you don't know about me? I feel like I'm at quite the disadvantage here."

"We didn't do a deep dive into your personality or anything. We really just know general things, your job, your old address, age, birthday, and some things we could observe like that you'd rather walk than take a cab and you'll sooner call someone than send a text, and at work when the store's empty and you're reading at the counter your face gives away all of your thoughts when you're enraptured." Bucky says.

"Woah." You mutter.

"We don't know much, not anything that anyone who worked with you wouldn't be able to find out but you learn a lot from observation." Steve says.

"Clearly."

"Any last questions y/n?" Bucky asks.

"What do you want out of this? Out of me?"

"We want to make you happy. Whatever that means." Steve says.

"No, I want you to be selfish with your answer, not diplomatic. What do you want out of this? What is the ideal outcome in your minds? If you two were writing this story, how would it end?" You ask. There's a pregnant pause as you're sure Steve considers another careful answer.

"We'd marry you. Devote our entire lives to you and in turn, you'd do the same. You'd come into our world, learn every bit of information and run it all with us. You'd walk into every room with us on either side of you. You could say jump and everyone under us would ask how high. In my version of the story, we make you a queen, adored by all. It doesn't all have to be tomorrow but that is how it ends." Bucky says. Steve sighs at the end of Bucky's answer. You're quiet for a long moment as you consider his words. It's dramatic and intense and realistically it should scare you because from anyone else it would come off as psychotic.

"Is it always like this with you two?" You ask after a while.

"What?" Steve asks.

"Steve you're more calculated with your words, everything you say is meticulous, thought out. While Bucky, you seem to be a little more impulsive. If you open your mouth you will say exactly what it is you're thinking, it's why you don't talk as much as Steve, right? You're more likely to say something reckless and Steve stresses when he thinks your words might cause trouble. The if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all rule." You explain. Steve and Bucky blink at you with clear shock on their faces. "You two aren't the only ones with observational skills." You say proudly.

"That is impressive." Steve muses.

"If she chooses never to see us again after this Steve I will never date another person. I simply can't imagine settling for less, because anyone else would be less." Bucky says to Steve which makes him chuckle and you giggle.

"To answer your question, yes that is usually how things are." Steve says.

"So what happens now?" Bucky asks.

"Now, I'd like you to take me home." You say standing up. Steve and Bucky follow your lead. Steve tosses bills on the table as Bucky walks you towards the door with his hand at your back. By the time you step outside the car you came in is waiting at the curb and the driver is standing by the door. Bucky helps you into the car before getting in behind you, while Steve pulls the door on the other side open and slides in, sandwiching you between them. The drive back to Wanda's is pretty much quiet, only once the car stops in front of her building and the driver gets out does one of them speak.

"Will we see you again?" Steve asks. The driver opens Bucky's side of the car and he steps out to help you out of the car.

"I only promised you one date." You say. "But, if you leave me with the best way to contact you, we'll see." You take Bucky's hand and climb down from the car.

"Your phone." Bucky says. You unlock the device and hand it to him. He inputs his number and then Steve's and gives it back to you.

"Goodnight boys. Tonight was nice." You say.

"Goodnight y/n." Steve says.

"Goodnight." Bucky nods getting back into the car. They watch you walk into the building and don't pull off until you're in the elevator. When you enter the apartment, quietly in case Wanda is asleep, you kick off your heels and let out a sigh.

"How was it? Tell me everything!" Wanda comes rushing down the hall and nearly gives you a heart attack.

"Fucking hell were you just waiting for the door to open?" You ask her clutching your chest.

"Obviously. You went on a date with two super hot werewolf crime lords I won't be able to do anything until you tell me about it!" She says pulling you to the couch excitedly.

"It was great Wanda. They're a little intense honestly, but they were perfect gentlemen and answered all my questions even though I basically spent the night interrogating them. I think I like them." You bite your lip shyly.

"Where did you go?"

"Dinner at some really fancy place. One of those restaurants with a set menu where each course is predetermined and it probably costs like a hundred dollars per person."

"Impressive." She nods.

"Everything with them is. They are-"

"Don't say too good to be true." Wanda points at you.

"I was going to say a surprise actually but too good to be true might be the reality. They talk about me being their equal in all things, like their business, and about making me queen of their empire and devoting themselves to me. It's a little love bomb-y."

"It's only love bomb-y if they can't keep the same energy. Some people just love that intensely and I'd say the fact that they've spent months adoring you without really any promise of reciprocation suggests that's just how they are. Plus werewolves are dedicated partners by nature, I mean it makes sense. Sure it's intense for someone that didn't know they were a werewolf a month ago and it's okay to be cautious, especially after Bruce, but I already told you they're not ill-intentioned." She shrugs.

"All very true things."

"So you'll see them again?"

"I'd like to." You nod.

"Oooo I'm so happy for you!" She squeals jumping up.

"Wanda calm down." You laugh but nothing could possibly chill her out now. Things are changing for the better quickly and Wanda has always been the biggest advocate for whatever makes you the happiest.

***

Part 8/???

Tagged Users: @cjand10 @vicmc624 @mandijo17

#marvel fanfiction #marvel #stucky fanfic #stucky x reader #stucky fluff #stucky smut #stucky #stucky angst #werewolf bucky barnes #werewolf steve rogers #werewolf au #Just Let Me Adore You #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #steve rogers

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bomberqueen17 · 1 year ago

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Loftus Bralette Sewing Journal: cutting out

LOL so I have started the project but not made a ton of progress, but I thought, well, I'll write it up anyway.

First thing I did was watch the sewalong. It's not the slickest, shiniest sewalong-- there's no jaunty theme song, there's no animated intro, there's no flashy graphics-- it's very much Old Youtubey, where it's someone actually doing the steps and showing you as she goes, not really sped up, with minimal intercuts. As it happens, the demonstrating sewist is the owner of Porcelynne, which is a lingerie supply company and pattern maker, and she also helped design this pattern and the previous Cashmerette bra because she is not only a bra specialist but also is a very busty woman herself, and so completely on the same wavelength. She has incredible technical knowledge, has clearly sewn very many bras, produces a lovely end product, and shows you several places where she either made a mistake or has made many mistakes in the past and has developed this trick to avoid the mistakes. So it's a good solid sewalong... just not the most short-attention-span-friendly thing in the world.

So I will say I watched the sewalong with closed captions on and at 1.5x speed, just for my first runthrough.

(I can't watch a sewalong or tutorial while I'm trying to sew a thing. I do best if I watch it first, so I know what to expect. Hopefully it relates well enough to the instruction manual that I can piece the two together and figure out what I'm supposed to do as I go.)

And now I've started my own sew-through.

I bought a bunch of stuff from Porcelynne-- a nice kit for once I've made it, but basic stuff to muslin it. There are several places on the Cashmerette website and also in the instruction book for the pattern that lays out exactly what fabric you need and what notions. I also then made a list in Sharpie on a scrap of paper, inventorying how many pieces of each pattern piece I needed, and how many inches of each type of elastic I needed, so that I could enclose that inventory along with this iteration of the garment, so that I could refer to the checklist.

I also labeled the elastic-- N for neckline, U for underarm-- as I cut it, so I would know what was supposed to go where.

[img desc my hand holding several lengths of peach-colored elastic, one with a sharpie N and the other with a sharpie U which is sideways and looks like a C but I know what it means trust me. in the background is a baggie with other elastic in it including two pink straps I cut off an old bra to reuse the notions. This bra muslin is not going to be all one color or even going to match, that's just how it is.]

I forgot to order cup lining, it was in my cart but then the session refreshed and I didn't re-add it. So I'm making my muslin with two layers of the same fabric, which means I need to label which layers are the lining and which the outer. This is both easier and harder and I'll let you know whether I recommend this or not 😅.

I'm following Jen from Porcelynne's suggestion of marking the wrong side of the fabric with painter's tape, and i applied the tape immediately after cutting out each piece since there's not an obvious right or wrong side to this fabric, and I also used a felt-tipped marker to write on the painter's tape which 1) piece it was, which 2) layer it was, and 3) whether it was the pattern piece or the mirror image. (Given my specific brand of neurospicy I cannot reliably tell left from right so I'm just making One Half Of The Bra The Same Direction As The Paper Pattern And The Other Half Mirror-Imaged and I'll find out which is right and which is left once i put it on.)

I also immediately used a felt-tipped marker to trace the grainlines on the pattern pieces, then flipped them over and traced the marker line onto the other side, so that I could see how the grainline should be oriented while I had the pattern pieces in mirror-image mode, since the most accurate way to cut fabric is not to cut it while folded. And i know myself, I'd want to wiggle the odd-shaped pieces to fit best on the fabric, and I'd fuck up the grainlines, which are important especially as some of the pieces are cut from stretch fabric.

To add to the confusion, the lining is inside-out from the regular bra. So my first layer, everything mirror-imaged gets an A on the end. (Piece 1a, 2a, 3a on the painter's tape.) but for the lining, the A goes on everything NOT mirror imaged, because the lining and main pieces are cut from the same pattern piece. So the first half of my bra consists of pieces 1, 2, 3 in main fabric, and then mirror-imaged pices 1L, 2L, 3L, and 6L in the lining fabric, and then also 6 non-mirror-imaged in the lining fabric-- 6 is the center front bit and you cut both layers from your lining.

So then the opposite of that is the other half of my bra. Pieces 1A, 2A, 3A, and then lining 1LA, 2LA, 3LA, etc. And then there are two copies of pattern pieces 5 and 4 cut from the powermesh fabric-- the powerbar, and the back band.

L for lining appears in the written instructions, and that plus my own inability to distinguish left from right is why the bra is not labeled L for left or R for right. L for Lining would confuse me even if I just labeled the right half. So I did not, it is Side Unmarked and Side A.

I traced the paper pattern in felt-tipped marker directly unerasably onto the fabric because this is my muslin. And then after I cut it out (with a rotary cutter and mat) I took a pencil, laid the translucent fabric over the paper pattern piece, and traced on every notch, every marking, and the entirety of the sewing lines. For the mirror-imaged pieces, I did this and then flipped them over and darkened the sewing lines onto the now-right side of the fabric. Because this is my muslin and it is far more important to me to sew it perfectly accurately than it is to have the marks erase for later when I maybe wear it and maybe never do.

Yes, this took forever. I did not do this at my usual cutting table I did it on the kitchen table where I could sit comfortably, because I only needed about 24x24" of space to work, and I needed good light and a very steady surface and to be comfortable and not rushed while I worked.

[image description: all my cut out pieces spread across my kitchen table/counter, labeled in silver metallic sharpie on blue painter's tape, with the roll of painter's tape and the paper pattern pieces and my cup of water and scissors all strewn around.]

As soon as I was done I lay everything out, compared it to my checklist, compared the checklist back to the instruction book, made sure the painter's tape was on the correct side of each piece, and then put everything neatly away. I have all my elastics and notions in one little plastic baggie, and then all of the second half of the bra (so, mirror-imaged main pieces, and then non-mirror-imaged lining pieces) in another little plastic baggie, and then the first half of the bra is just in the main baggie that i put the other baggies into.

I brought the whole thing down into my sewing room, and what I did was get the lid of a rubbermaid tote to use as a tray, and lay out half the bra on that, triple-checking the orientation of the pieces, and I did find one where the masking tape was on the wrong side somehow argh. But I've started off by sewing the outer layer and lining layer of the first half together, and I got like one seam in before I was interrupted, but everything inactive is still in the baggies and everything active is on that rubbermaid tote lid in its correct orientation, so I could walk away from it and know where to resume when I come back.

I also have the paper pattern pieces easily to hand to check that notches are correctly marked, because I have no faith in myself to have done that right consistently. Normally I put the pattern away but I'm not doing that here, and I think it makes sense to just print the pattern out numerous times and put any corrections on every instance of it, and then have several copies of it so that any project in-progress can still have the pattern pieces with it until it is complete.

This is my note to myself to do that, keep the pattern pieces there and make adjustments as necessary and then when I finish the muslin, print out another copy with adjustments included.

I also would like to print out a mirror-imaged copy, and potentially have separate pattern pieces for the left and right, as I expect some asymmetry to be a factor.

#loftus bralette #sewalong #cashmerette patterns #bra sewing #diy sewing

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barelyspiderman · 6 months ago

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" my name is penelope park, and I DOWN KNOW how this story is supposed to go. "

A STUDY OF ... college dropout. not trying to be a hero. working to live. ghost town. the fae court. volunteering to be experimented on just to live because you got bit by a radioactive spider. friendly neighborhood spider to no neighbors.

rp blog for PENELOPE PARK the THE SILK SPIDER.

aerialist by nami.

knowledge post

hi! my name is nami, i'm 22, i use it/its pronouns, and i'm an animator(i have a degree lmfao)!! here's mobile rules :)

Don't be a dick. This is probably my number one thing, this is for tumblr, it's writing, it's for fun. So lets have fun.

OC. Crossovers. Duplicates. I LOVE ALL OF THESE!!!!!!!! I am a huge advocate for ocs, especially as an oc writing myself :] I love ocs, give me your ocs. Give me crossovers too!!! He is literally from another world than main verse, so yes. Then duplicates, I LOVE DUPLICATE!!! I love discussing them and writing the interactions and WAGH!! Whether it be twin verses or otherwise, I grabby.

Selective. Mutuals Only. For the sake of my comfort, this blog is selective and mutuals only, meaning if I don't follow you, please don't try to thread with me or reblog my posts. I'm okay with sending questions or anons, but actual threads is a nono.

Mun =/= Muse. i am neither of these characters. please do not equate their actions and morals to my own.

I will not hold back my muse. I don't like to restrict or hold back my muse. I let the muse go in the directions the muse wants. The second I feel forced or the muse feels forced to do something that's out of character or unrealistic for the character, it causes inspiration to dwindle.

Triggers. This blog is 18+ only it will contain triggers. i try to tag as much as i can, but i am bound to miss things.

Discord/IMs. Discord is open for mutuals!! I am practically always on discord, I do the occasional discord drop, but all you have to do is ask and I'll give it to you.

Other Blogs. i have many...many other blogs. if i'm not here, i'm likely on one of those!

Activity. I have recently graduated from art college in Animation! So I am extremely busy trying to find a job and the like. This blog is LOW ACTIVITY.

Length. I have a habit of writing a lot. Like a lot-- You don't need to match my length, I just ask you give me enough to work with...that being said if you reply to like 5 paragraphs with a single sentence, I probably won't continue the thread lol.

I think that's it? I'll add more if necessary :)

#pinned.#nami. 22. it/its.#spiderverse rp #spider verse rp #marvel rp #spiderman rp #spider man rp #spider-man rp #i will. make a seperate post for a bio #(the knoweldge post)

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radioiaci · 11 months ago

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@angelsandemons ⧐ 5, 14, 30 RPC TOPICS ASKS.

5. dash commentary DASH COMMENTARY IS SILLY and I think it's a great way to get your character involved in the goings-on around town, especially if you're not sure how to start with someone or a group of someones. My ONLY thing about dash commentary is that you want to be sure that what you're responding to is actually something that is not supposed to be private or privileged information about a character. If a character is openly musing about something that your character should NOT know about, then using dash commentary to comment on it is probably not appropriate. Just read the room, but otherwise, it is REALLY fun to play with. 14. icons Icons are TOTALLY not necessary, but I do like to look at them when my partners use 'em! But it's not a deal breaker. I often have threads these days where none of my icons make real sense for the expression I'm envisioning Alastor to be having or for the situation, so that's when I break out the divider. The divider I use to help break up text just so my eyes don't miss anything, but neither are wholly necessary. I also make my icons bigger because... idk... I like them 2 be bigger... sue me... LOL. But don't worry if you don't have icons! I think they're great to have and give me an idea of what your character's expression might be at a glance, but with the right writing partner, I can envision it in your writing. :3c 30. your choice! something that came up today is the concept of mutual effort that I really really try to enforce. sometimes I can get a lil wordy and I understand if someone needs to take some time to match that vibe (and sometimes it's not possible to match at all just by nature of how someone writes/their character motivations) BUT I appreciate so much when someone can meet me, not necessarily in length, but in depth of the narrative that we're crafting together. if all I get in response is surface-level of your character when I've gone in depth about my characters feelings and thoughts, then it's REALLY hard for me to want to continue a thread or be excited about playing together. so I think that is something that I'm probably going to be a bit more stringent about as time goes on. especially with a character that I have such a personal connection with and it's discouraging to see someone almost brush through it without seeming to care. enjoy the TAKES.

#⨻ answers ⨻#angelsandemons #▶ after-hours broadcast ▶

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onegirlatelier · 2 years ago

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August 2023 | Dressing gown based on yukata

I wrote a while ago that I want to post more finished objects here, now that I'm trying to repair my relationship with dressmaking. It's thirty-five degrees Celsius over here and I'm having either covid or a really bad cold, so forgive me if my logic is twisted in places.

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This is a dressing gown heavily inspired/pretty much based on a yukata (a lighter kimono which you wear in the summer, especially to the summer festivals). I've wanted a kimono/yukata for so long, but practicality-wise I was also in need of a dressing gown less warm than my fluffy towel one, and when I saw this fabric I had the idea to make a dressing gown that's basically a yukata but with mods because a) it was a Western fabric, b) I wouldn't be wearing it the traditional way.

I hope it's fine and not culture appropriation...and to be able to defend that, I have watched documentaries on the making of yukata in Kyoto and also examined carefully two websites containing detailed info on how to make an actual yukata. Any changes I made should hopefully be a conscious decision, and this project can be a test run for when I can afford an actual kimono roll of fabric and an occasion to wear it!

That's my reasoning. Now let's move on to the fabric...

Guthrie & Ghani floral stencil print in #navy. 20%linen+80% viscose. I would NOT recommend this fabric for dressmaking unless it's for a rough outer garment. The fabric was very scratchy with linen bits, and I had to manually pull out the prickly bits as well as tumble wash it twice. I don't think it's intended for dressmaking...but I was so excited and realised it too late lol.

To help reduce the scratchiness, the shoulder lining was a cotton/silk blend. I think a thin but sturdy cotton would be a great choice but I didn't have that; I just had a lot of sheer cotton/silk blend leftover from other projects.

The contrasting colour facing (which is not traditional): from a scrap fabric basket of a shop, a cotton/viscose blend. It was a twill weave with that typical smooth powdery finish you get with viscose twill.

Notes/Mods:

130cm on CB instead of the traditional 160cm. A yukata is quite long (equals your height) because you wear it with a triple fold at the waist, called an ohashori. This fold allows the wearer to adjust the length of the yukata i.e. where the hem hits. Since I'm not doing the ohashori, I don't need the extra length.

My fabric would actually only allow an 110cm CB if I were to cut the front and back in one piece (as is traditional), because I had only 2.2m of it. It was not cut on grain, but also there had probably been a bad shrinkage. 110cm was way too short for me. To maintain the flow of the pattern on the back, I decided to add fabric pieces directly to the bottom of the front, because there were more things going on in the front so the pattern was disrupted anyways. This way, the front and back were still largely cut in one big rectangle, which is more recyclable.

There are not separate front strips (okumi) on my gown. Usually there would be, and there would actually be some shaping for the upper body achieved through this seam between the okumi and the front body. I omitted them because a) I wouldn't have enough fabric to match patterns if I had cut them separately, and b) I wanted to reduce weight as much as possible because this fabric was so heavy.

Perhaps most importantly I omitted kise. A kise is when you press open a seam, you don't press it entirely open, but leave about 0.2mm of fabric folding over the seam so that the seam is hidden. This technique is used throughout a yukata. I suppose that this helps protect the seam, since it's easier to reinforce a kise than a seam when it's worn. I omitted this again because of the fabric. Too heavy and bulky.

Since I used a Western fabric, this means I had to use different seaming methods than the traditional ones, because traditionally almost the entire yukata/kimono would be have selvage edges at seams. I could not just anchor down the seam allowance; I had to hide the raw edges neatly.

The shaping of the collar is traditional, but the construction was me. Usually you would use a long strip that's double the width of the finished collar, and fold it. I'm not sure if it's traditionally accepted to have the outer fabric and the lining of the collar cut separately. You would also need a collar reinforcement, which I omitted.

Traditionally you don't cut away any excess fabric on the front (on each side you would have two rectangular pieces of fabrics, the front body and the okumi). You just encase the excess as seam allowance in the collar. This way the fabric remains very recyclable and you can also adjust the collar for another wearer. I think this is truly a great idea, but I had to do some trimmings again to reduce bulk and weight.

Contrast colour for facing. I am pretty sure this should not be happening, because a yukata is supposed to be simple and summer-y. My mind was so dominated by the Orientalist paintings of G. H. Breitner which was a shame but the kimonos themselves were so pretty. Since I'm wearing it just for my pleasure, I added a bit of flare.

Normally, when I deal with raw edges, I whip-stitch with a tiny mark on the right side. This time I tried to do a blind stitch that leaves a tiny mark on the right side and no stitch marks on the wrong side. It is easier than I thought it would be (after lots of practice) and I might be converted.

In two or three places I just could not do a two-fold hem, so I smoothed out the fabric and did a little bit of overcasting.

I had tried the latest way of doing bar tacks and I didn't like it, so I stuck to my usual method.

Just a wide belt for now~I don't think I'll ever make an obi for it, but if this pattern is ever done on silk, I might just make a lined kimono with an obi!

#sewing #sewblr #stories #kimono #yukata

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ev-n-learning · 1 year ago

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2023 year stats!!! Wow its been a year since ive shown u one of these... amazing

anyways not too much to say here i don't think! Although can you believe its been almost a year since i stopped learning ukrainian.... weird

something thats interesting to me is that i've spent more time on czech this past year than ukrainian the year previous... and just on duolingo, somehow?! There's no way I'm 2 months away from finishing the czech tree!!!

I suppose the courses could have been different lengths to start out with, but I do blame the redesign they did... I still don't like it, lol. (Other factors could be: czech has No Cyrillic so i cant read it as well)

As far as the other languages go — I really can't believe it was only this year I finished 50languages?! Year so long... but anyways, after that i will be honest with you: most of my active belarusian studying has been solely anki and (mostly) daily search of the wordle. The other most is People I Follow On Tumblr and tiktok (theres belarusians on there)

Russian is about the same as I've been doing. Slogging through 5,000 words of top 10,000 on memrise still. Probably about 2,500 of the way through. Probably at LEAST 2 more years of slog...

Maybe it doesn't serve much of a purpose, but i'd feel weird having the extra time. Like, no, i'm supposed to be Doing Something at 14:45,,, and, yknow, sometimes i encounter these words in the wild. (Not so much anymore though)

Doing my best to keep up with polygloss for russian, too! It's fun but I never know how to describe the images so a lot of matches get sent into the ether... oops 😅

As for marathi, well................................. nanowrimo happened. Is putting it shortly - actually, I started doing something else in november, and with that, languages, and nano... it was a lot! So I did not do much marathi in november specifically because of that. The rest of the year, well... hmmm. The less said the better?

Well, anyways, it's because of having to spend the same amount of energy almost on czech at the same time, *and* because of the Something Else i've been doing. So - I do want to learn it! Spending time on marathi would be great, actually! I am just Busy. And thus it has been relegated to anki only for the better part of the year if i remember right 😔 someday...

Sidenote, at the rate I'm typing this will be posted after midnight..... well, i wanted to put it out there yesterday night, but i couldn't decide what to say, lol. January 2nd is still New of new years, right??

To be honest, I haven't really thought about any language plans for this year... i know russian and belarusian well enough to read posts & such, and I have the mental fortitude to read books i understand maybe 25% of, but listening and talking I'd say are probably where I need the most improvement. (Writing, well... I'll get back to you once i can learn grammar effectively). With everything as it is now, I'm not sure there's much to be done about that, but maybe I'll figure something out here sooner or later... maybe.

I know I want to finish the czech tree on duolingo, and then I'll pick another language from my duo list and the cycle shall begin anew... and then in 12 years either duo will be dead or i will not wish to learn languages any more (a scary thought). OR i will speedrun every language on my list to the best of my ability and then never touch duo again (no streak, no badges... i think monthly badges are like the Only duo thing that actually works on me because i Need To Collect. ah, fomo...)

As for marathi, if I can manage to pull it out of hibernation alongside all that duolingo nonsense, then by god i'll do it 🫡 if i learned* one language by being exceedingly slow at it I can do it again!!

*referring to russian so perhaps its not accurate to say "learned" still but my point stands

...

Anyways yeah!!! Idk how to end this so з новым годам (late) to u all and good luck & wishes for the new year <3 things may never be perfect but at least i can hope they will be better 👍 🎉🎉🎉

#alt text #stats for cats #langblr #learning languages #languages #year in review

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magmaticmachine · 2 months ago

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how would the boss rematches for the NID bosses even go anyway, and i guess some of them would need reworking to incorporate something interesting

best i can think of for puffy is a longer course given the similarity between her and donbalon

for gillwing, not only is his body length doubled, but he now has spikes on his chin, forcing nights to paraloop him [not sure about the instakill though]

oh and they all could do with those masks too, maybe when the fight is done nights destroys the masks, and with them destroys the ideya captures [the yellow ideya captures dissolve with wizeman's dispellment alone]

[btw about the nodes in the last ask i may have worded that part poorly, but the idea of having more time to explore the dreamworlds on foot sounds like a prospect, i just wanted the gameplay to be the same as the original while still treating the ideya as macguffins]

Interesting question! I am not good with game mechanics lol

Okay so. If you can't pull off the tail trick, it takes, like, 21 successful hits iirc to take down Gillwing. Doubling the tail, armoring the face, and removing the paraloop insta-kill would honestly be too cruel. Honestly, I'd just give the big guy a fireball ability, something like the one from the Nightmare Zone DLC for Sonic Lost World, or maybe a dash phase where he chomps at you two or three times in quick succession? Alternatively: Monster Hunter his ass. I wanna hit a big dragon frog with a big sword and make adorable frog-themed armor.

Donbalon's fight is straight-up a redux of Puffy's at a somewhat harder-to-parse angle. Just giving her a longer hallway doesn't really strike me as interesting, but I don't know what else I'd do for her. Either the opera theme could be played up with some sort of sound-based attack, or the mansion itself could be played up into a more labyrinthine area. Make that house a home, y'know?

Gulpo and Clawz I REALLY don't know. Gulpo's whole thing is setting traps, and realistically they'd just have the big fish set More Traps...I do think a charged up chomp move or a little plasma ball might be fine. Or maybe some kind of net trap that slows you down, and THEN an attack if you're stuck in it. Again, though, at a loss for this guy.

And then the whole point of Clawz is to break those fireworks before they go off and grab the bastard quick. Realistically they'd just add more fireworks, but I'd like to maybe see something done with Clawz's apparent speed – maybe a grapple like Reala has in NiD or IF DONE WELL. MAYBE. some kinda quick time event, maybe you hit him as a counterattack. idk

Jackle, maybe his tarot cards could have effects now, or he can use some of the knickknacks around his arena, like the guillotine and the jack-in-the-box. Probably would make decent obstacles.

Reala needs to be a mirror match. Explosive dodgeball just isn't satisfying enough, I need to personally throttle him. Doing something more with the grapple/power struggle thing he occasionally does might be fun but realistically his ass is getting paralooped IMMEDIATELY. I don't mind him having some kind of fire power either though, but...feels weird. NiGHTS and Reala are supposed to be equals, but NiGHTS doesn't summon anything like that...

I don't know what I would do for the Wize Guy™️ but at this point the big bastard just needs a different fight altogether. He's a pushover in NiD and he's even more of one in JoD despite requiring the gimmick masks. Even utilizing those it remains far too similar visually and mechanically to NiD's fight; Bellbridge overall suffers this same way. Also I don't think the persona system really...needed to exist, aside from swimming it's almost entirely useless in JoD. The dragon and rocket exist solely for two specific bosses and a couple of collectibles. And visually personas on each of the bosses I think would feel very cluttered. It already works poorly on Reala's face, hiding the W shape of his cowl in JoD; and Puffy already has a mask as well...I think their designs will still read just fine without adding anything like that.

TBH most of the JoD rematches really weren't harder, just...more tedious. I didn't even use the rocket persona for Cerberus at first and still got away with a passable rank before I figured it out – unless you're going for an A-rank, every boss in the game is kind of a pushover. Bomamba was the most annoying since that fight is a physics puzzle that requires you to be fairly steady and there's a million things getting shot at you, but even then, like. Sometimes the cats just get dropped directly into the hell pits, which is nice.

Also RE: the nodes; I'll be real, my very first assumption was that they were to do what the Ideya Captures were already designed to do – they already hold up your progression and require blue chips to break down, if you run out of fly time without breaking 'em, you have to break it as Elliot or Claris, and until you manage that NiGHTS will be in the palace lookin' very "sounds like a skill issue." about it. The thing that make me reconsider my initial reading was you mentioning having to break those TO dualize lol. So your wording was probably fine, I just overthought it! (This happens to me often.)

#nights into dreams #long post #ask #thefallen16

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punkscowardschampions · 6 months ago

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Roses pt.2

Moses: [do obvs, and just know that he’s immediately getting out of this car and picking this girl up to CRADLE her like an absolute baby, with no fucks given to any passersby or anything sensible like that, for a full minute ™ which would feel like forever to y’all because you never wanna be apart and have been acting like you’ve not seen each other for a thousand years, when he finally gets into the car, still no fucks given, because he’s getting into the driver’s seat still holding onto her for dear life and keeping her so close to him as she’s sat in his lap, only letting go even slightly so that his hand can go between her legs where it ‘hurts’ and stroke her there (over her clothes, for now at least) like you would someone’s arm or whatever if you were trying to comfort them, being the slowest and gentlest he ever has as if y’all have nowhere to be ever and this isn’t supposed to be a secret and thus much more subtle lol, eventually rubbing circles too like you do on someone’s back for the ‘there, there’ of it all, but we all know where that still soft and gentle contact is hitting, clothes or not, and we likewise know the EYE CONTACT is insane the entire time]

Rio: [truly out here acting like it’s been any length of time when we know it’s not and you’ve been apart mere hours, holding onto him with a level of physical clinginess that matches the emotional one, like he was taken from you and you thought you’d never see him again, pushing your face into his neck more than you are nuzzling at this point, the !! is aggressive, lord knows how y’all get in this car but you’re making it work and it’s making her die how close you’re keeping her, before he even starts touching her there’s a noise as y’all land in this seat that becomes a NOISE, nodding furiously like you found it because you would not tell him where it hurt but there was no need to guess]

Moses: [mhmm y’all are bringing a level of highkey to proceedings always and forever, the drama mick, this grown man in such a bad mood and sulking like a child because he had to drop her off home for a second, god forbid, hence the escalation of going under her clothes as soon as he hears that NOISE to touch her the exact same way because the restraint is being shown in how slow and gentle it still is and the fact he’s not putting his fingers inside of her yet with !! how he usually does so therefore he’s capable of no more, bystanders if you see this, no you don’t because he’s only LOOKING at her]

Rio: [anyone who could be around, don’t be lmao, ‘cos they can’t possibly move at this moment in time, sorry not sorry, so much was just said and you don’t even know where to begin with any of it, and that’s before he’s being distracting beyond all measure with what he’s doing so you’re just LOOKING back at him too and all you do say is ‘don’t go’ because he said he would and you know you don’t want that]

Moses: [give them a moment please there’s much to address lol, jemily knows damn well that he only discussed leaving so that she’d be anti jali like him because he was literally like if I do go it’s their fault but this girl has no reason to see that he’s full of shit and his threats are as empty as his promises, not yet anyway, shaking his head and KISSING her like no I won’t, the softest he has ever because these are proving I can be soft hours, but it’s so much more dramatic and intense for that and he’s ofc continuing his v distracting antics so]

Rio: [we see right through you, sweetheart, but this girl is here giving you all the reassurances you want ‘I do need you, I’d be so lost without you’ her breath catching on the word ‘without’ as if it’s winded her it’s so unthinkable and offensive but also letting his KISSING overwhelm her so the ‘you’ is barely spoken after and is also completely into his mouth, running your hands up his body from his lap, stopping when the skin gets noticeably warmer where his tattoo is and MOANING, deepening this kiss without being frantic, just INTENSE]

Moses: [me and my boo rolling our eyes but she’s falling for it and right into the trap of giving him exactly what he wanted and set out to do with this convo, he couldn’t be happier and she’ll feel that thanks to being in his lap, likewise finding wherever her tattoo is with his free hand and GRIPPING onto the fabric there in a fist to pull it away from her skin, loose as that top already looks like it is if we’re going by the pic, giving caring and like you want said tattoo to be able to breathe even more but really he’s just !! hence at the same time his fingers finally slipping inside of her, working up to the standard 3 he’s always gotta use though instead of going right for it because like I said these are soft hours, starting with 1 and again being so slow and deliberately gentle as if she’s never been touched before, doing a MOAN of his own as if he’s fucking her with his dick instead of a single finger because feelings and horniness are high]

Rio: [I think her tattoo was just above her elbow sort of placement if I recall, so it’s giving pulling her by her arm is a way she’s obviously into, going to touch him too which is always more of an event unless the boy is only in his pants or in trackies because there’s always zips and whatnot, so looking at him like ? to see if he wants you to or not because he’s being slow and deliberate and maybe that’s against said vibe even if he did MOAN]

Moses: [love that, I couldn’t tell from the pic obvs cos it’s zoomed in but that’s cute and good to know for future ref even if I’ll blatantly forget in the future haha, we can’t tell what you’re wearing as trousers in that pic sir but I’m 100% sure there’s all that nonsense because you’re not dressing trackie casual, giving her a look back like ?! are you going to or not, giving nothing away because he does love to test her]

Rio: [scowling at him but immediately smiling after in a pouty sort of manner because you’re not fewmin obvs, just here pawing at him with as much blatant intention as you can over his clothes like hmm, do you want this or not because of course his body does, whatever he says, doing a BIG sigh, that’s shaky as hell because of what he is doing to her, resting her chin in his shoulder (that isn’t tattooed) like guess I’ll wait SO impatiently then hehe]

Moses: [smirking back at her because he’s that bitch always and he thinks he’s such a big brained mastermind despite being nothing of the sort, raising an eyebrow at her like she does her big sigh like oh you okay there hun because he’s radiating smugness from every pore at how shaky it is, choosing the moment her chin lands to finally employ that 3rd finger and do the most that he has so far to get a reaction, I love that he hasn’t said a word yet btw, okay mysterious girl]

Rio: [shhing him (for smirking so loudly lmao) directly in his ear only for your shh to get ironically LOUD because he of course had to do that and kill you even further, owwing like I told you it hurt but we know this oww sounds INDECENT and is not an indication to stop by any means]

Moses: [doing a hot lol at how loud the shh gets because he’s once again smug af about it, how could he not be, but it of course turns into a LOOK which is blatant heart eyes/ 🥺 and his own shh + comforting sounds at her owwing because he’s going from smug arsehole back to loving father energy immediately, kissing her tattoo spot with the material barrier in the way but as if it’s not, like maybe if I kiss that better you’ll forgive me/I’m pretending to misunderstand that this is what hurts because I wanna atm, soft but indecent being the vibe here as it is with continuing to touch her because we’ve once again added in the rubbing her clit antics from earlier for added ‘there, there’ and I’m so soz energy]

Rio: [‘I hurt’ to repeat yourself in person and aloud this time because you are NOT okay and the 🥺 is mutual x1000 tbh, whimpering like you are on the verge of tears, biting your protruding bottom lip to stop it wobbling so, hugging into him so you can pull on his clothes that are in your way ‘dada’ fully whining it and LOOKING at him like, HELP ME]

Moses: [calling her whatever specific and personal gypsy nickname he used for Edie from the moment she was born/inside Alison and therefore still uses to this day, giving baby but more special (we SEE you sir, doing such a shameless ref she will recognise because she can’t remember being an actual baby and if you called her this too or not, but strongly putting the idea out there that he deffo did, true or not) spoken as a sad sigh (being the first thing he says, iconic tbh) as if he’s likewise SO upset about this and asking himself/her what to do about this awful predicament, when he’s nothing of the sort and is in fact thrilled (because everything about the entire spectacle of what she’s just done couldn’t appeal to him more, duh) and that’s evident because the sighed word is almost a noise, bouncing her on his lap like she is said baby, except not at ALL, we’re all fully aware what this action is (despite the fact he’s added sad eyes to this too now like oh poor you and a furrowed brow as if he’s genuinely pondering what to do) and as per she’ll be able to feel exactly what her whining and everything else has done to this man because his physical reaction is indecent and !!]

Rio: [KISSING him so you don’t ruin the illusion you are in great pain (although, in a way, completely true) by GRINNING at him because his performance is likewise exactly what you want from him and you could not be more into it, telling him how hot he is which is close to indistinguishable because you are crashing your mouths together that hard and with no room for breathing, let alone talking, only pulling back to LOOK at him again 1. Because you are bouncing back as !! as he is doing it and 2. Because you want to work out if he did call you that or he just did for the first time because obviously you’ve heard him call Edie this name so you get the vibes and you are OBSESSED either way unfurrowing his brow with her fingers, turning into stroking his whole face like look at you]

Moses: [KISSING her back because this is the first moment he can be fully !! instead of being gentle and soft because he had to prove how careful he could be but that doesn’t mean he can sustain it forever by any means lol, catch him biting her bottom lip before she pulls back because simply must when she did it first and looked so adorable doing it and he wasn’t okay, LOOKING back at her too with SUCH dramatic intensity because he wants to just go feral rn but clearly is telling himself no not yet because it annoyed him earlier when she said he wasn’t being careful (even though he isn’t ever), giving nothing away technically about whether that name was used for the first time or is a throwback because he’s likewise too into it regardless and that’s all she’d be able to read in his face, making the noise that the earlier sigh wasn’t quite when she strokes his face, quietly but dramatically, continuing to move this girl with INTENT]

Rio: [really leaning into this kiss and him, trying to make him go feral because you want to and thus you need him to because you know he’s making you wait right now so you have to win him back around fully ‘do you hurt too?’ whispering when he makes this NOISE, cupping his face like oh no, but of course you’re pairing this with some very intentional movement in his lap]

Moses: [he could stop her and really make her wait if he REALLY wanted to prove any kind of point, but is he, no of course not, a nod because yes blatantly but also to kinda shrug his face from out of her cupped hands because he can give out all this softness but he can’t take it lol, burying his face into her neck as they get a proper rhythm going here, to slightly muffle the swearing he lets out as if he can’t possibly let her hear it because that’s bad dad behaviour]

Rio: [‘let me help you’ as a phrase that’ll vibrate against him now his face is buried into your neck because you want him to accept your softness lowkey but not enough to force the issue, especially not in the moment, taking the opportunity, however, and making the executive decision to get him enough out of his clothes to tease fucking you properly like you know you want to]

Moses: [again, you could stop her because she’s expressed that y’all can’t be having a pregnancy happen rn but he still is very much not taking even a second to derail this or stop things from escalating into feral territory remotely, instead what he is doing is KISSING her neck and absolutely doing the most with that]

Rio: [tilting your head towards the roof because thankfully neither of you is driving right now and you don’t have to keep your eyes on the road, letting him really go to town on your exposed neck, gritting your teeth about it and feeling his now uncovered self, finally getting to touch him and do the teasing he’s been doing to you]

Moses: [for once y’all aren’t dangerous driving and we’re all welcome, crimes are still being committed but not in a moving car at least, my boo said the shoe’s on the other foot now sweaty and she’s so right for that, catch this man putting his thumb in this girl’s mouth to do it because of the whole thing of having to get past her gritted teeth and all that and once again show how easily he can whilst simultaneously making an absolute meal of it, hilarious truly because he’s the one MOANING about finally being touched, she isn’t being loud here]

Rio: [you know she’s here now being NOISY as hell, moaning around his thumb like it is something else entirely and yet looking so innocent about it like this is all you needed the entire time, resting her head down on his shoulder again and looking up at him shamelessly sucking his thumb, not stopping touching him though, of course, doing it like it’s just another thing to comfort you and you’re not slowly but surely trying to kill him]

Moses: [we see you both because he’s here doing his usual BIG stroke of her hair as if that’s just a comforting gesture and not him shamelessly controlling her going to town on his thumb like he manoeuvred her head during the car bj moment, sir you’re beyond obvious and the eye contact is once again off the charts levels of insane and intense, repeating what he called her before and the only word he has said beyond since now also swearing by being like ‘that’s it + [this nickname]’ with such proud dad and good girl energy because as per she’s doing everything right]

Rio: [the combination of this nickname that you LOVE him calling you and the memory of all your previous car shenanigans being so blatant in this moment has you pushing yourself even harder than he is, GRINNING at him now, holding his thumb between your teeth whilst you do, biting down ever so slightly and making a noise that’s giving am I doing a good job still? Because can never have enough praise]

Moses: [grinning back at her when she bites him a lil bit like you would a cheeky kid you’re not at all mad at and are shamelessly encouraging, running his thumb over her teeth like parents do when their babies are teething and they wanna feel if a tooth has come up yet, it’s giving that, or that he’s counting how many teeth she has as his tiny bub, asking ‘are they hurting you too?’ like he’s so concerned, adding in the sound effects that are like poor baby without him saying it]

Rio: [biting down harder as you nod your confirmation to his question, the yes, though muffled via obvious means here is still so INTENSE it’s insane, headbutting his shoulder like a toddler throwing a tantrum because that level of overwhelm hardly feels foreign to you now]

Moses: [if that’s one thing about this man it’s that he loves her to just lose it, if he was there for the ruster kitchen drama he’d have been egging her on so hard, hence he is rn by taking his thumb out of her mouth with as much !! as he put it in so that he can hear her repeat that yes screamed from the rooftops, giving her a LOOK which needlessly makes it even more obvious that’s what is expected of her and what he wants]

Rio: [she could but dream, instead a VERY traumatising time was had and we do not wanna think about that right now thank you kindly, not when we’ve got all the yeses to throw out, literally like we’re trying to set a record for how fast we can say the word as many times as possible, like how can I make myself abundantly clear to you rn sir, beyond maintaining EYE CONTACT too]

Moses: [this man LIVING for how she’s tripping over her words because of how eager she is to please him, really appealing to him in an ideal way once again gal, as a result he simply cannot resist positioning them while she is talking so that if either of them makes the move to he’ll be inside her but not making that move himself because really in the mood to make her beg on this day before he lets that happen, not once breaking the eye contact while he’s manoeuvring her about so you know his eyes are BLUE af about it]

Rio: [going to bite your lip again when he’s positioning y’all and you know what’s coming but resisting when he doesn’t immediately make it happen and thus it’s obvious you’ve gotta keep behaving and give him more, licking your bottom lip instead and only breaking this insane eye contact to LOOK down at what he is yet to do like oh ‘I told you I need you’]

Moses: [not him tilting her chin back up immediately like well how dare you break this insane eye contact when they’ve been making it since he showed up, okay mr extra ‘you’ve told me loads today’ because a convo was had and he will hold a grudge]

Rio: [making a little noise of surprise but more !! lbr when he lifts your head, doing a mini shrug because you don’t want to be moved even slightly by it ‘then tell me’]

Moses: [when you did that initial head tilt at a normal level of contact but then the lil noise has him HOLDING onto her with more !! moving her face closer to his so that when he speaks it’s against the bottom lip that she licked but a moment ago ‘you don’t need me enough yet’ because she had the audacity to say that they’ve gotta wait until she’s older to be wilding in these streets the way this man wants]

Rio: [we are BREATHING like we’ve just ran a race, or like y’all have already fucked each other senseless, here almost panting in the face of this claim like how can that possibly be true, shaking your head like yes I do]

Moses: [tutting like no no, but practically in her mouth because he’s not moving away at all, shaking his head at the same time as she does hers so they are in sync despite him being like no you don’t which is the opposite with his gesture ‘But I can’t be as cruel as you’ as if she called a complete and utter sex ban until she’s 17 when she’s done nothing of the sort ‘I love you too much’]

Rio: [‘don’t you think I love you?’ asking seriously but also talking against his lips because you aren’t moving either, our tone is SAD because you called us cruel]

Moses: [‘you wouldn’t do anything for us’ the unspoken like I would for you in his tone rn and he’s likewise SAD about it, closing his eyes for a sec to really emphasise the fact because they’ve been doing so much LOOKING at each other]

Rio: [the urge to pull his eyelids open like OI coming upon you but managing to stop at your fingertips gripping onto his cheek and brow bones for a hot !! sec before letting go, pushing his face away from yours much gentler than that move just was ‘what haven’t I done for you?’ like hello, have done everything you’ve asked, no matter how much I should not]

Moses: [when he knows damn well she has that urge and his face is giving DO IT so hard, eyes closed or not, because he is that bitch, once she instead pushes his face away, GRABBING hers again with !! and forcing her to LOOK down at the position they are still very much in ‘it’s what you’re not gonna let me do’ as if he’s not allowed to cum inside her ever again which we all know is simply not something that’d ever last or be true]

Rio: [when you’re literally shaking at being in this precarious position for so long but not being able to do anything about it and now you’re being confronted with the sight of it as well as the sensation which makes you want it even more so you just push down as hard as you can without warning to make it happen ‘I’ll handle it’ because you clearly have been this entire time y’all have been seeing each other to avoid getting pregnant]

Moses: [the way he immediately goes feral in his response is giving handle THIS because petty king, could not be pushing himself deeper inside of her and then pulling out again so she’s deprived of the sensation as immediately, likewise without warning, literally grunting with effort of both, very mature, you’re really selling yourself as someone she should let herself be impregnated by underage sir]

Rio: [the heart eyes you’re giving him are so unhinged because you’re in no position not to have your eyes rolling at this so the effort it takes is matching his, nodding like go on, do it]

Moses: [this man needs 0 encouragement to keep up these antics but she’s given it and he’s ofc taking it, repeating the same move but with even more !! launching himself at her to kiss her on the thrust in and breaking it on the pull out, like this is a game when it’s so serious]

Rio: [laughing in an even more unhinged way, somehow, because you are making SOUNDS at his antics that you have 0 control over and they are intermingling with your giggles and you just sound beyond indecent tbh, when he comes back to kiss you one of the times holding onto his head with both your hands and wrapping your legs around him like I’ve got you now, biting onto his lip so he has to rip it away if he’s gonna]

Moses: [forever spurring him on to being his most unhinged self, his breathing meanwhile has never been this indecent, really out here sounding like y’all have run a marathon, pulling his lip away with enough force that he’s gonna be bleeding and feeling that both in the moment and in the aftermath but in contrast doing the opposite of pulling out, MOANING as he holds her in the exact position she’s in, his hands GRIPPING onto her to keep her there]

Rio: [GASPING like it was your lip that got pulled, your hand flying to your mouth reflexively because you didn’t mean to hurt him but you have now and you’d be lying if you said you weren’t turned on, that hand is holding back a MOAN as loud as his own, but you’ll repeat it without being asked because you have to put your hand on his heart/tattoo as you say ‘this is where I’m meant to be’ because all the meaning of course]

Moses: [the girls are losing it and I’m cackling remembering that they are once again in a car in an inappropriate location and time (given that he said in the convo that the shop wasn’t shut) for any of this, in response to what she said though, taking off his top however chaotically he has to here and now while still fucking her with all the !! because he doesn’t care if she’s not meant to touch it, in this moment he NEEDS her to and the eye contact he’s giving when that t-shirt (I think? going by the pic) is over his head is SCREAMING that]

Rio: [truly, playing a dangerous game on this day but we know why, to prove you can and not get caught, covering his entire tattoo in kisses because that many kisses is feral but you can still be soft and not do any real damage, just have to be over his entire pec right this second sorry, kissing your way up to his lips again and resting both your hands there between y’all]

Moses: [it’s not subtle but neither is the way that she’d be able to feel the effect that first kiss making contact with his skin would have him feeling, shamelessly out here almost cumming just from that and then they keep coming (no pun intended haha) so he’s really out here doing his best not to die asap because he doesn’t want to before she’s covered every inch of this tattoo, under his breath swearing again but it sounds more like a prayer because jesus this, god that, christ almighty this, lord that in such a frantic tone, kissing her back when she gets to his lips like he’s relieved for the opportunity to shut the fuck up/he’s about to collapse if he doesn’t and needs her oxygen desperately]

Rio: [you know she stayed there longer than strictly necessary because loves when he gets all blasphemous about it and shamelessly wants to listen to it for as long as she can but you two are both too far gone to keep it up for long, gotta go at this frantic until you’re literally unable to support your weight and collapse onto him entirely]

Moses: [mhmm x 100000, he’ll be calling her the v special baby nickname for a 3rd time (because 3 is her number and therefore we must, even if he hasn’t planned it himself, I can and will be cinematic) as he cums, no notes]

Rio: [no notes indeed, except to say we call him a name we used to call him as a literal bub and has only been remembered via us being told by Ali and it is coming back to us once more in this moment as we cum]

Moses: [y’all are unhinged and it’s too much fun, grinning at her, bloody lip and all, because even if he wouldn’t have typically remembered this name she used to call him given his shitty track record this man has been thinking about that time period TOO MUCH since roses got together and so it’s believable he could recall it and be OBSESSED by it, touching his lip and doing the most breathless hot lol because couldn’t be happier in the immediate aftermath of all that feralness hearing that specific ref come out of her mouth ‘you love me’ like okay, I stand corrected, ‘rewarding’ her by staying inside of her and intending to for as long as he can]

Rio: [that was unhinged and you know it, SMILING into your own chest as you hide your blushing and own hot lol like I know, I know because you really just said that, making a mhmm kinda noise ‘I did warn you’ because we done told you we do, recovering here on his chest and listening to his heartbeat as he does too]

Moses: [pulling her head up with the gentlest hair pull he has ever done because he wants to see her blushing adorably ‘and I warned you I miss you’ the I miss you in gypsy lingo cos that’s how he said it when he did earlier, as if that excuses any of his behaviour because in his mind it totally does, continuing to softly play with her hair as she’s resting on his chest, putting it up if only with and in his hand as he’s done before]

Rio: [doing the biggest and happiest sigh of all time, calling him daddy in gypsy lingo like you’re saying everything back to him and then some, so much feeling you don’t even know how to handle it, kissing his cheek as gently ‘do you forgive me then?’]

Moses: [the way the d word would have his dick twitching, however dead they are rn, ‘what did I say?’ because he said something earlier to the effect of not being able to be/stay mad at her and that’s clearly true all things considered, including that action happening v unsubtly ‘don’t you feel you’ve been?’ because being so loving rn in this moment and he’s literally inside her still as they speak]

Rio: [shifting as unsubtly on him about it, even if neither of you is acknowledging it to the other you both feel it, studying his face and eventually kissing his other cheek (the one that isn’t right there for you to reach up to easily) like yes, I do feel it ‘just checking it’s real and not only on a technicality’ because want to be properly forgiven and not in a fight with you]

Moses: [doing an intake of breath that’s almost a GASP but smaller about that unsubtle movement of hers, turning his cheek like a jesus ref about forgiveness lol, to kiss her on the mouth, as a peck but more than that ‘I promise’ because in this moment he sincerely couldn’t love her more once again]

Rio: [grinning and giving him your own peck but make it extra back, quick but full of !! ‘we should probably move then’ ‘cos it is not late enough in the day for this as we’ve mentioned, looking around like this has only just occurred to you, however, looking back towards where the farmhouse is, even if it isn’t in sight like whoops]

Moses: [moving in a completely different way to the one he’s well aware that she means, pulling out enough that his still ultra sensitive tip is able to do the most to her in a likewise still ultra sensitive place and thus demanding her full attention despite their surroundings needing some and them having places to be if they’re gonna shop and/or go on this date]

Rio: [really GASPING at this, LOOKING at him full 😯 like you can’t believe he’s done this when it’s the most him thing to do and you very much can lmao, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and resting your forehead against his so you’re now making EYE CONTACT that close together like okay, you have my attention]

Moses: [SUCH a breathless hot lol at her 😯 face because it’s yet again the cutest, telling her she’s cute by uttering that single word, almost in a whisper because his voice is hoarse for obvious reasons, as she wraps her arms around him, moving again so that when she’s resting her forehead against his he’s pushing back with his own for a !! sec, watching her eyes get bigger because they undoubtedly are at the sensations he’s providing atm]

Rio: [‘you’re not’ brutal diss, no just kidding, we’re shaking our head and then KISSING you because you’re so hot it’s hurting our feelings for real, doing some of your own blasphemy under your breath and against his cheek as you’re kissing down to his jawline]

Moses: [‘what am I?’ as if he doesn’t already know, a dramatic nod that helps him the same way the forehead touch did in doing the absolute most when he hears that blasphemy because it’s even better coming from her clearly as a church going good girl to his fallen bad boy, like yes, you’re so correct don’t ever stop talking like that]

Rio: [‘corrupting me’ like you were that good of a girl when we know the truth lol, moving in a way that makes it very clear how you feel about it though, giving him a lil bite just under his chin and above his adam’s apple]

Moses: [touching his tongue to his fucked up bottom lip like yeah maybe because she wouldn’t have done that until now but he’s clearly the opposite of mad about it, he’s giving her heart eyes from their close af proximity and letting them hit her with full force just like every deliberate movement, biting said lip as her teeth make contact with his skin, to emphasise the noise that escapes regardless more than trying to in any way suppress it as well as ofc making his lip bleed again for the hotness of it]

Rio: [touching your fingers to his bleeding lip and smearing it across them, stopping breathing about it because said fingers are already trembling and you know your breath would be shaky too ‘I can feel how much you like it’ as a whisper, like he’s not aware he’s inside you and is giving away exactly how much, licking your finger tips like you’re just curious and it’s nbd]

Moses: [licking his lips cinematically as she licks her fingers, not even as intentional mirroring he’s just gotta like when you have sugar on them and simply must lick it off ‘I meant it, what I said about how being inside you feels’ because he said earlier that it feels like god wants him to be inside her forever and always and he’s as sincere now as he was when he typed it]

Rio: [doing your own dramatic nod because you know he meant it and you also believe it as genuinely as he does ‘you can feel it too’ because it’s not like you’re sat here turned off, not even a little, smiling at him and licking your own lips because you’re watching him do it ‘I’m serious about how committed I am to you’]

Moses: [smiling back at her because yeah he can feel it too, thrusting deeper into her about it because he can’t not, taking her hand and doing a lil kiss where a wedding band would go because he mentioned those earlier as well ‘me too’]

Rio: [‘I can’t believe this is happening’ as if the force of that thrust just pushed those words out of you, because truly, a correct response, how did you get here and so fast girl]

Moses: [doing a harder one like believe THIS as if she’s doubting him and his feelings instead of how wild it is that y’all are here in such a short space of time, making his eyes water a little bit because y’all hadn’t recovered enough for how any of this feels, so it’s almost like he’s crying like he said he could earlier too]

Rio: [all the swearing you have to do to not scream, your voice being very !! and close to it but we’re demure lmao, though you could lose it at how his eyes watering makes them look the most blue they have ever ‘drown me’ like actually going to die in your eyes excuse me]

Moses: [thank goodness the ghost of Carly isn’t haunting him cos if she was she’d appear at having literally said shit so similar herself, not that this man remembers a word she’s ever said, but I do ‘we’ll go together’ because how wet she is undoubtedly could drown them both in this car rn, and he’s thrusting in and out of her at a pace to needlessly overemphasise that while also refusing to blink so his eyes are watering even more]

Rio: [my boo says I remember thotty, sadly we can’t haunt this girl into running although that would be quite the wake up call lmao, not you clamping a hand over his mouth as well as yours so he can listen to how wet you are and just how wet you are like yeah we will, goes without saying you are making indecent EYE CONTACT that’s got your own eyes watering too]

Moses: [jemily wish but unfortunately not, instead what’s happening is he’s pressing his mouth against her hand when she does that so she can not only feel his insane breathing against it and any noises which do escape but also she’ll get blood from his lip on her skin, maintaining this indecent eye contact to such insane levels until his teeth graze her palm too because he’s so !! letting them dig in like they’re fingernails leaving a mark]

Rio: [saying feral shit against your own damn hand like you can’t move it, just to see what he can hear and what he can’t, making it a game but also you gotta be feral because he’s killing you and you want to look at his bloody lip print on your palm but also you kinda want him to bite you so you’re just there being indecisive and turned on, we’re back at almost bouncing in his lap territory you’re so !! and don’t know how else to express it]

Moses: [having to join in with this game even though there’s no hope of any of it being coherent with or without her hand being there because of all the panting and moaning he’s having to do at how she’s moving and what she’s saying because what he can’t hear and therefore has to just imagine is as fun as what he can understand, being LOUD as if that’ll mean she’ll understand him perfectly like he’s abroad talking to a foreigner lol but we all know he’s just gotta be loud to be extra]

Rio: [when you simply have to do the most now to try and kill him again, will not be able to focus on anything else until we have and you can tell that’s the sort of mood you’ve put us in from how truly shameless we’re being about everything]

Moses: [luckily for this girl this was always gonna give being an unhinged quickie because of everything that came before it and the recovery time they didn’t even try to give themselves so it defs won’t take long, the passersby are again welcome too tbh, shh sir, not that he will until the literal last second but still, he won’t take her hand away until then either, doing it once again so easily that it shows how easily he could’ve at any point, breathing so so dramatically once he has]

Rio: [fr, you’re actually going to have to fling yourself off of him when y’all die into the passenger seat because overstimulated is the word and you actually cannot bear any more, here breathing like you truly did just escape death like jfc]

Moses: [‘where is it you reckon you’re off to?’ but he’s not mad about it only smug truly because it’s blatant what she’s doing and why and he’s always just gonna be thrilled he has killed her that hard, especially her because it’s mutual which obvs isn’t always the tea, watching her amused because the drama mick as if he isn’t in a similar state of being himself, flushed, sweating, still practically gasping for air etc etc]

Rio: [just looking at him like hush you because you can’t even say it in your current state but of course you don’t want him to either because you love how smug he is and can only be so embarrassed of your state when he’s in the same one, shaking your head like oh you as you open the window and lean your head out a little]

Moses: [reaching for her like you’re going to immediately pull her back into your lap and force her to stay there but instead making her decent by pulling her clothes back over her to cover the parts of her that have been exposed since she got in the car basically, STROKING her hair again as she leans her head out the window which he’s obvs doing big enough to again seem like he’s gonna pull her head back in but he’s holding onto the back of her neck post hair stroking and keeping her there getting fresh air ‘can’t you let him handle it?’ eventually being spoken, not at all clear but he means can’t you just let god decide if you get pregnant or not because she said she’d handle it when she initiated their first hook up and he’s gently moving her head so she’s looking up at the sky, nobody get it twisted, this isn’t really a question, he’s telling her that’s what he wants her to do]

Rio: [giving him the oh thanks absentminded sort of smile because you’d gotten so used to the level of undressed and dishevelled you were that you weren’t even thinking about making yourself decent at all, resting your forehead against the cool window in the way you were resting it against his only moments ago, making a little noise that’s somewhere between turned on and comforted by having his hand on the back of your neck, moving where your head is looking, staying quiet for a beat as you think about what he’s saying ‘you said, they’ll kill you’ practically as a question, like what about jali/my family]

Moses: [‘either way’ because that’s what the tea is, whether she has a baby or not, jali would kill him for ever touching her, as they should, said like it’s casual and he doesn’t really care at all cos we’re not appreciating the gravity of the situation at any point or he simply wouldn’t have done this, he’s just that bitch thinking he’ll find a way out of it/jali won’t actually murder him ‘they’ll never accept that you’re with me’ his hand instinctively holding onto the back of her neck a bit tighter as he says you’re with me because it’s such a possessive phrase]

Rio: [a very quiet ‘I know’ because you do and you feel awful for the danger you’ve put him in, never mind the unspoken and unknown added comprehension that no one would accept you and Buster either (or at least that’s the current conclusion you are at) ‘no one will’

because never forget the legal trouble you could be in that you just never acknowledge sir]

Moses: [planting the softest kiss ever below where his hand is ‘we have to just do what we want’ because he’s the anti Buster in this scenario like he’s the anti Johnny in many others and doesn’t give a fuck for consequences, legal or otherwise ‘you know’ whether that means you know I’m right or you know what you want or both]

Rio: [turning, after his kiss and however little you can turn your head with his hand on the back of your neck to try and look at him like BUT !! ‘until you die and then you can’t want for nothing’ like what do we do then, reaching out to hold his other hand]

Moses: [‘I won’t’ said like such a dad to a little girl’s question/irrational fear which is why I think we should kill him regardless of what else we decide to do because he seriously thinks it’ll never happen ‘I told you, I love you too much to be cruel’]

Rio: [my boo says you ain’t immortal honey, watch me (and she’s so right for that) but you’re just here getting fobbed off and you know it so just looking at him imploringly like but really though ‘I love you that much too’ like I don’t want you hurt on my behalf]

Moses: [‘come here’ letting go of the back of her neck so she can because he’s that bitch who thinks holding her again will fix this and lowkey anything/everything, I say sir this is SERIOUS, you’re taking your life in your hands, but here we are]

Rio: [this is your parenting style/how you live your life, we know, and she isn’t about to refuse to hug you because that would feel mean/we don’t have the willpower rn, so crawl back into his lap and curl up into a ball basically, making yourself as small as you can]

Moses: [forever and always, for better and mostly worse, yes it is, so this snuggle pause is going ahead, once again like they have nowhere to be ‘Whatever happens to me because of you is worth it’ not you saying you’d die for her, sir be so fr, also putting ALL the blame on her not at all casually]

Rio: [nodding like okay, because you have to go with it (you don’t) ‘we’re doing this, we already have’ like well there’s no turning back now (there is) because you have already crossed the line in ways you can’t take back and that’s not a lie, jali would already want to kill him for how far this has gone, not that that means you should just have a child and tie yourself to him forever but you’re hoping that you can just avoid that subject for now, SQUEEZING him tighter for what he says]

Moses: [‘I’d do it again’ into this snuggle, because he would and we all know that, he’s learning no lessons on this day or any other and has no regrets, Buster I wish you would but I get it]

Rio: [‘you love me’ the way he said it earlier but obviously completely different in tone, we’re not being smug but like oh my God, do you REALLY love me that much because heartbreakingly we can’t imagine that]

Moses: [a nod because he really does believe with his whole heart that he loves her that much, saying ILY in gypsy lingo with all the feeling this man is capable of which is clearly a lot, you intense bastard ‘I’d die if you left me, to be sure’ because again how he feels, never over Alison leaving him to this day, unspoken vibe of jali murdering him being a maybe (to that DEFINITE) when it’s nothing of the sort]

Rio: [the HEART EYES have never been bigger or more real, here we are really getting won over so fast because you do believe him, even if it’d be better for your heart in the long run to not, you do and you’re in it too, saying it back and giving him a really soft, almost familial kiss on the lips like y’all haven’t just banged so ferally before this conversation ‘I will never leave you’ promising with your whole chest like whatever happens, it won’t be that]

Moses: [mhmm, and he knows he’s won her over once again so he couldn’t be happier, me here like Buster PLEASE, as per, but no so he’s giving those heart eyes back and then putting HIS whole chest into kissing her again SO indecently after she’s promised]

Rio: [silently MOANING into this kiss, pulling him into you by his top, sitting up slightly from your curled ball position to do so without him having to really bend down ‘tell me what you want from me’ like I know but remind me PLEASE]

Moses: [me like I sure hope you put your top back on and haven’t just been sitting here topless and crotch out this entire time sir while having a serious-ish convo because imagine ‘be older now so’s I don’t have to wait for what I want’ as sincerely as the ILY and the kiss and all the rest as if she can]

Rio: [if you here naked we gonna have to godmod that for you hun because that’s simply too much lmao ‘alright’ nodding like you can make that happen any harder for y’all both wanting it this bad, flipping your hair out of your face so you can see him better, doing a little smile like it’s done]

Moses: [agreed, I already can’t take this man seriously ever without that, thank you, cupping her tiny face in his big ass hands for that size comparison shit they just love, LOOKING at her like you’ve gotta check she truly means this when you know damn well she does, you just wanna hit her with those eyes again]

Rio: [we’re giving puppy dog eyes back at this moment because too deeply in love with him for our own good, overwhelmed and hence having to give him an indecent cheek kiss/ending up licking him about it]

Moses: [sos they’re both in too deep atm and it’s all Winnie’s fault, when you’ve gotta hot lol at her antics but it’s all of a second before he’s once again manoeuvring this gal’s face (will he ever stop, I fear not) so that she’s licking his busted bottom lip whether it’s bleeding currently or not, like you did this you fix it, but it’s just another excuse to be indecent in this car]

Rio: [giving his cheek a little nip like hey don’t laugh at me before he’s manoeuvring your face and you have to gasp like oh no, I’ve not learnt my lesson at all, making comforting, cooing I’m SO sorry noises as you lick and kiss and suck his busted lip into your mouth, ultimately just making it bleed again we all know, swearing when the metallic taste pools on your tongue]

Moses: [his face fully encouraging her bad behaviour in that little nip because he’s 100% that bitch but then she’s all over his face at his request so then he can only encourage her with NOISES of his own as well as making it beyond clear with how he’s holding her face that he never wants her to stop doing any of this, especially when his lip is shamelessly bleeding again and they have the same obvious reaction to it, because in no world is he not swearing too, using whatever word she has not but with the exact same energy, practically finishing each other’s sentence because if she said jesus he’s saying christ or if she said fuck he’s saying me, if she said christ he’s saying almighty, something to that effect, we know what I mean]

Rio: [making a point to bite his top lip too until it bleeds because you can’t handle him finishing your sentence like that and you��ve got to show him how he’s making you feel, lapping up the blood like you’re dying of thirst, telling him how much you love it when he bleeds for you]

Moses: [me like sir you undoubtedly have work tomorrow because you always have work unless it’s sunday so do you wanna calm yourself but clearly the answer is no because he’s too into it ‘you wanna keep it one-sided’ like oh THAT’S why you didn’t bleed for me when he took her virginity but we all know the real reason and that he’s just taking an opportunity to remind her of said first time and how much she wanted him]

Rio: [decorum has flown out the window never to be seen again, I fear ‘you’re not that sort of daddy’ placing his hands on your booty like no, you could simply never hurt me, kissing him better some more and humming about it contentedly]

Moses: [honestly, are y’all ever gonna drive, the answer is obvs also no because instead he’s cupping her booty in his hands like he did her face moments ago, giving it a lil squeeze ‘long as you’ve no need of putting in your place’ because she’s SUCH a good girl but there’s the suggestion he could be that sort of daddy if she isn’t, hence needlessly emphasising this by smacking her booty but in a love tap/men doing sports and being homoerotic kinda way not a !! one while she’s still behaving]

Rio: [wriggling and jiggling into his hands because you love to see it, even more so when he gives you a little tap, doing an OTT sigh ‘if only I didn’t have to be so good’ because simply cannot help behaving for him but you are so not opposed to being put in your place, of course]

Moses: [feeling all that wriggling in his lap and being unable to keep still himself about it ‘if I was a better catholic’ as his own OTT sigh like what a shame we’re not just doing anal for jesus because you know she’s still not sold on the 100 babies idea]

Rio: [doing your own hot lol because you’re imagining how good he’d look in the getup, explaining that by pulling on the collar of his top, bringing it up higher and nodding like yep, you could rock it, blushing when you really think about what he meant though ‘wasn’t that church girl’ to be like I’ve never done that before without saying it]

Moses: [nuzzling into her flushed cheek with his own to feel the heat of her blush while he SQUEEZES her booty again, caps this time because it’s got more !! in it for the fact he’s also thinking about it now despite the joke it kinda was ‘explain another verse to us’ because she did earlier but you weren’t into it because it was about the notp of Johnny and your sister’s flop marriage whereas this moment has an entirely different vibe, giving mhmm I know what kind of church girl you are, so good, so PURE until roses happened]

Rio: [STARING at him and making whining noises under your breath, so quietly but he’ll still catch them every now and then, especially when you stop to nuzzle each other for that hot sec there, here scrambling to think of any verse you know (that's not giving nativity or easter that everyone kinda does) because your brain is melting at these vibes rn, casually panicked and getting even redder about it, but eventually think of some Moses to tell him because main character vibes he will enjoy]

Moses: [maintaining eye contact as he rewards her for appealing to this ego (the way she’s really good at doing) by choosing appropriate bible quotes she knows off the top of her head enough (and better than him anyway so he won’t question if they’re a bit ad libbed) by spreading her booty cheeks apart with his hands while he pushes his crotch into her, they’re both fully clothed but she’s only got little shorts on as we recall from her outfit so she’ll get a trial run of how this would feel, cos he loves to test her and this shamelessly is]

Rio: [having to concentrate so hard on these quotes as he does this that you’re almost going crosseyed from the sheer effort, crackly noises coming from your throat as your mouth is left open, swallowing big to try and wet your mouth to speak ‘this is why good girls stay good then’ like now I see]

Moses: [concentrating equally hard on watching her every reaction and his antics like a multi-tasking icon because both are as important, adhd whomst, doing a noise like mhmm which is blatantly more of a noise ™ because it’s affecting him too, he’s only human as much as he likes to pretend otherwise]

Rio: [‘father will seem formal but-’ grinning at him like gotta do what we gotta do, resting your head on his chest and looking back to watch him and what he’s doing, arching back into the rhythm of it]

Moses: [grinning back, telling her that whatever she called him remembered from being a bub as she came is his fave and dada from earlier is a close second but letting it be known from his face and his continued antics of dryhumping her like this that he isn’t opposed to the formality under the circumstances, it’s getting close to him being called a god, we all see it, so ofc he likes it]

Rio: [snuggling up to his neck and squirming with the memory of calling him that because it’s your favourite too ‘you made me forget my big girl words’ whispered in his ear]

Moses: [‘you make me forget he ain’t the only one who can see us’ because hearing someone outside of this car isn’t making him stop it’s just spurring him on to go harder, spreading her wider and pushing himself against her with INTENT before putting his thumb in her mouth again, cos we all know what he wants that to be covered in spit for]

Rio: [whipping your head ‘round so noticeably but you are likewise not rushing to stop because you’re into it despite rationale that you shouldn’t be, GROANING about this increase in pressure, shaking your head and looking heavenward like I can’t believe this is happening, holding onto the pad of his hand underneath the thumb, sucking it dutifully but nibbling on him, just to show you have some nerves despite your downess]

Moses: [a nod at her groan like yes exactly because that’s the reaction he wants, holding her gaze when she’s sucking his thumb, having paused his other feral antics for a sec to make sure he’s got her full attention (as if he wouldn’t) and to show he understands the gravity of this situation at least ‘I’ll be gentle’ showing her with his other thumb and through her clothes what he intends to do, just rubbing slowly like look you can trust me]

Rio: [nodding back, kissing him softly but with SO much love that it has that passionate edge to it because you do actually trust him to be gentle about it and he’s shown you he can ‘I want you to’ only dropping his thumb from your mouth at this point]

Moses: [everything about how she behaves is once again perfect for this man and therefore as he’s pulling her clothes out of the way (wow she’s really been dressed for a record amount of time lol) he’s kissing her forehead with good girl/proud father energy before then taking that sucked thumb and touching her exactly like he said he would, pressing his forehead gently against hers as the first contact is made]

Rio: [pushing your head into his inadvertently pinning him to his headrest for a sec as you get accustomed to this new sensation, the GASP making way for a hot lol only for another smaller gasp to follow ‘God, I love you’ pulling yourself back slightly only to free him, pulling him with you though to kiss him to muffle some of the noises you’re making here on this day]

Moses: [still being gentle but applying slightly more pressure because he can’t help himself when faced with these reactions, there’s only so much patience this man has and he used it up earlier when y’all were messing about, the kiss doesn’t have to be as soft though and when he has that lightbulb moment of realising that, his tongue being extra about it in the way his thumb can’t be]

Rio: [lbr she’s into your lack of patience and how into her you are forever and always, never mind just into the sensation and down to continue so you’re getting 0 pushback here, hence the ‘push me’ into this kiss, when you can, when you’re not all up inside each other like you’re having a contest]

Moses: [they’d be shippable if not for the multiple heinous red flags waving in our faces, pushing his thumb inside of her when she says that but not how she would’ve expected, gotta keep her on her toes and more importantly take some of how wet she is to lube up his thumb again before he goes for it putting it fully inside of her elsewhere, stopping to LOOK at her, checking that she defs wants this for a !! second]

Rio: [mhmm, if we ignore the crimes lmao, ‘I’m not just saying it’ as a yes, I want this but having the slightly defensive edge of being like I’ve meant everything I’ve said, just because you’ve had to backtrack on the immediately giving him babies thing for his own good]

Moses: [‘this might hurt more’ in explanation of why he’s paused and asked because we see her defensiveness, he said those words during their first hookup and he’s not wrong it could ‘or you might really have an accident’ again phrased like that because she did when she was like please pull over or I’ll squirt rn immediately, all the throwbacks, but fr 💩 is a possibility as he didn’t warn her that they were gonna do anal stuff on this day, not you trying to put her at ease by telling a baby anecdote like don’t worry if you do shit on me though because you have before, y’all’s kinks are out of control, but lowkey that is kinda sweet of you in the freakiest way possible, sir]

Rio: [frowning at him, because now you’re in your head and out of the moment, even with him being sweet and trying to hit you with all these reminders, shaking your head like no, I won’t, as if you have full control over this when the point is losing it but you can’t now so it’s a pointless exercise and you both know it, moving away slowly like you’ve simply just changed your mind ‘later then’ said so casually with a shrug because want it to be]

Moses: [frowning back at her for frowning at you, very mature as ever, but he’s like well excuse me for trying to prepare you for this and be vaguely responsible for once, putting the thumb in his mouth when she moves away, not actually because he’s sulking that hard but to clean it off as this is clearly not a goer now, biting it sassily as she shrugs like okay then if that’s what you want]

Rio: [me like not you doing him down for actually being nice for once but you can’t help it so I should not shade you, raising your eyebrows at his sass like really? Getting out of his lap awkwardly and rearranging your clothes once again, not looking at him again and flicking the music on]

Moses: [me like that’s the last time he’ll try and be remotely grown up about anything with how hard that backfired haha, shrugging at her eyebrow raise but otherwise not acknowledging her because he’s finally starting the car and driving away from wherever the hell they’ve been for a million years]

Rio: [oh no lol, god what have you done (pink pony girl), the way you’d wanna just get out of this car but that feels a strop too far and you’re trying to be like no this is casual, this is fine so you must not be that diva, so instead you’ve got to kick back and pretend you’re just vibing to this music so much rn]

Moses: [RIP to the shop assistant who is gonna have to deal with them soon because he’s driving to the shop they talked about earlier likewise as if everything is fine and casual and we’re all buzzing for date night]

Rio: [YIKES, the way you don’t even want to get food now never mind do the whole shopping spree but you’ve got to make him driving this way make sense so you’re suggesting that you can just get the food instead now because lbr you wasted so much time there so it can be giving we’re running out of it energy]

Moses: [my boo says we simply don’t wanna think about food or pooping ever again thank you hun, the way he isn’t even listening to her though is so real, not even in a being a stubborn prick way (though it’d be understandable if she took it that way) but genuinely isn’t listening in an adhd way, he’s driving there cos that’s what they said they were gonna do and she was excited about, even if they only have 10 mins to shop, even if they get there and the shop is literally shut they’re still gonna go there because it was part of the fun plan ™ ]

Rio: [‘I’ve not got my wallet’ even though you know the plan would not be you spending your own money but you genuinely would have forgotten it as you were running out of your house to see him so impromptu like you were]

Moses: [taking his out of his pocket and throwing it into her lap, with his eyes on the road for once, because obvs I’m gonna pay, no discussion necessary]

Rio: [making the okay then noise like I guess that’s that answered, going to lay across the backseats and be on your phone because there’s clearly no conversation to be had here]

Moses: [but of course mr fickle over here wants to talk the second she decides to do that ‘let’s not play this game’]

Rio: [‘I’m not playing a game, just hardly in the mood now’ stopping typing/scrolling/whatever you were doing on your phone to speak but not looking up at him]

Moses: [‘give us your phone’ said like a dad who’s confiscating it, literally reaching his hand back so she can hand it to him because he’s clearly expecting her to]

Rio: [holding it up but not giving it to him ‘why?’]

Moses: [‘I’m intrigued what you’re in the mood to do instead’ because we’re now mad that she’s questioning it instead of handing it over immediately]

Rio: [‘I’m just texting my friends’ and showing him the screen but not giving him your phone, tone like it’s not that deep because truly just trying to distract yourself with whatever mundane drama your friends are offering in the chats right now]

Moses: [‘I’ll not tell you again, you can hand it over or you can get out of the car’ because sis we’ll make it that deep, she’s annoying him now lol]

Rio: [scoffing like are you serious as you thrust this phone at him like see for yourself]

Moses: [not you throwing her phone out the car window, slightly more dramatic than the underwear of before, the lack of chill is hilarious, she won’t find it funny though]

Rio: [when your initial reaction is to follow it so you open the door but thankfully do not just get out of a moving vehicle so you just look at him like stop the car now without shutting said door]

Moses: [do stop the car very dramatically, like a child having a tantrum, not safe at all because it’s so immediate we all know, deliberately not looking at her]

Rio: [resists urge to be dramatic and have you fully fall out of this car, go and rescue your phone even though it is almost certainly fucked and you don’t even know what to do now, just going to the side of the road so you don’t also get run over to top it all off]

Moses: [it’s this grown man driving away and leaving her there without a phone that works for me, he’ll do the parental thing of coming back when he’s decided she’s waited long enough, but still]

Rio: [oh girls, we are actually horrified]

Moses: [I’m triggered because his ‘get in the fucking car’ reminds me of jali when he was like get on the bike and Ali was like no, don’t remind me you’re related ever again thank you]

Rio: [my boo says BISGUSTING and it is, this girl will actually be crying because she’s not prepared for any of this, getting in the car and saying ‘take me home’ in the passenger seat this time but couldn’t be sitting any more on the edge away from him]

Moses: [‘don’t go crying now’ being said moodily but he is taking her home and she’d know that from the direction they’re now heading because he isn’t gonna do anything but that now that he’s taken the sec he left her there to calm down slightly]

Rio: [‘you broke my phone and then you left me’ stated plainly like there’s no need to elaborate on why I’m upset and am allowed to be]

Moses: [‘I’ll buy you a new one’ still in a huff like omg get over it as if it didn’t JUST happen]

Rio: [shaking your head like no you won’t/no thank you]

Moses: [‘why are you being like this?’ the audacity sir]

Rio: [‘I couldn’t get home without you, so I had to get in the car even though I don’t want to be anywhere near you’ spelling it out like that’s why I’m so upset because you left me with no other choice]

Moses: [‘you didn’t want to go home or be anywhere near them when you were crying over being dropped off’ as if she’s being beyond unreasonable rn when it’s in fact him]

Rio: [shaking your head like forget it because he doesn’t want to see his wrong and you aren’t about to make him]

Moses: [‘fuck’s sake’ because he got rid of her phone to make her talk to him and she’s still refusing to]

Rio: [‘you did this’ like don’t swear at me, this wasn’t my doing or idea]

Moses: [‘you pushed me, girl’ because nothing is ever his fault, oh no no]

Rio: [‘you won’t need to worry about that anymore’ like I’m going home, that’s your problem solved]

Moses: [driving more dangerously in response like fine, you wanna go home so bad I’ll get you home in record time]

Rio: [‘you already scared me’ because true and we’re in tears, you don’t need to do all this]

Moses: [again stopping the car so abruptly but this time to LOOK at her, breathing and blinking as if he’s gonna start crying about it]

Rio: [me like at least you would’ve put your seatbelt on this time so you aren’t flying across the dash lol, looking at him, for a literal second like yeah, do you get it now but saying ‘just stop’ softly when you look away again]

Moses: [‘I can’t’ with all the feeling ever despite it being said as softly because his defence is and always will be that he’s so cray because he loves her so much, he is that toxic male cliche]

Rio: [just here cradling your broken phone, having never felt more like a child in your life, shaking your head because you don’t even know how you’re meant to respond to him rn]

Moses: [giving her his phone by so gently placing it in the space she’s left by being on the edge of her seat because her sim won’t be destroyed and she can easily swap them over and do whatever she wants rn including calling someone else to come and get her if that’s what she wants]

Rio: [looking at his phone for a while, considering the pros and cons and realising that calling someone else is too much aggro because they’re going to want to know why you are where you are and you just simply can’t be bothered to try and explain this away, passing it back to him with a nod like thanks but no thanks ‘you’d only have another argument with my mammy’ like let’s just get this done]

Moses: [shaking his head like no I wouldn’t because despite how untrue that may be he means it sincerely in this moment, leaving his phone in the middle console so she can change her mind if she wants to or use it for anything else including whatever she was OG using hers for because he has no interest in using it himself rn, starting the car up again but driving the careful-est he’s capable of this time, biting his lip so he doesn’t say a million things, we all know it’s bleeding again but he’s ignoring it now]

Rio: [‘don’t hurt yourself’ patting yourself down as if you’re going to have brought tissues with you randomly but obviously you’ve not and you don’t have much hope for the glovebox either but you check nonetheless for something suitable for him to clean himself up with]

Moses: [making a scoffing noise because he could not care less rn he’s too emo about the turn of events today has taken, sir they were your own fault, if she passes him anything he will be pushing her hand away, so gently, but still]

Rio: [when you’re about to tell him to just stop then but you realise he’ll give you the same response so you catch yourself before you do, putting your hands up like fine ‘we’ll just go home and forget about it’]

Moses: [‘you’ll go home and forget about me’ like that’s what you really mean hun I’m aware, said so forlornly as if that’s the gospel truth]

Rio: [‘don’t be silly’ because even if that were the plan, would not be that simple]

Moses: [‘I’m not’ because what everyone says when they absolutely are]

Rio: [and you’ve said the same so you aren’t going to deprive him of the right, just shaking your head like no that’s not what’s going to happen and yes, you are but okay]

Moses: [‘you’re the one refusing to let me make it up to you’ like YOU’RE being silly not me]

Rio: [‘I don’t want to make up yet’ which is simplifying it a bit but it’s not a lie either so you’re going with it]

Moses: [‘if that’s how you want things to be left’ because you can’t force her here and now even though I know in my heart and soul that he’s gonna go buy her the car he promised ASAP (so probably tomorrow) and leave it for her outside Ali’s or the pub (depending on the o clock and where she’ll be) with a big bow on and that there will be a new phone in the glovebox/middle console because he can’t be told or take no for an answer]

Rio: [me like SIR, do you think you’ve not been suspicious enough lmao, she isn’t remotely at that bday where a car is a suitable present, not that it’s anywhere near her bday anyway, good LORD, giving me a heart attack just thinking about it, you wanna get caught so bad]

Moses: [just like well now you can always get home and you don’t need to get in a car with me EVER AGAIN because he’s so dramatic, we can always skip to her discovery of that whenever you want btw because we all know this car ride is gonna be a lot of awks silence]

Rio: [I will post this for us then we better sleep, sadly]

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tinygumdrops · 1 year ago

Note

i will definitely keep that in mind! i feel like it’s not even competitiveness but the sheer amount of stuff i need to do that’s stressing me out, but im taking it one day at a time and doing well

can i ask what clerkship is?? i dont know much specifics in the whole med school /residency/fellowship track LOL

Hi! :D So sorry for the late response. Things got a bit hectic irl ;-; But I'm really glad to hear you're doing well!

I hope it's safe to assume you're from the West---I think majority of the folks on here are. The US system is the one I'm most familiar with, so I'll try to explain using that as the basis. So once you graduate from premed, you take the MCAT and go to medical school, right? Well, med school typically lasts for four years. Unless your program is MD/PhD or MD/MBA, where they sometimes stretch into six to eight years.

Those four years are divided into pre-clinical (first two years of didactic a.k.a. MS1 and MS2) and clinical years (last two years, MS3 and MS4). After the first two years, you can take the first out of the three licensure exams, USMLE Step 1. MS3 and MS4 are your "clerkship" years. That's when you spend most of your time in hospitals and rotate under different specialties. After MS3 though there's another hurdle to overcome, and that's the second licensure exam, USMLE Step 2 CK, which tests your clinical knowledge. There used to be a USMLE Step 2 CS which was supposed to test your clinical skills but it's been discontinued since COVID.

Anyway, after you're done with that you continue MS4 with rotations in hospitals again. Around this time you'll also be applying for residency training in the specialty you want to be in. You submit your Step scores, med school grades, CV, letters of recommendation, etc. to an electronic portal which forwards them to all the residency programs you're considering, and if the program committee ~☆deems you worthy☆~, they'll extend you an invitation. Once interview season is over, you'll be able to rank the programs you like from your first choice to last, and the programs will do the same by ranking their favorite candidate to least. The electronic portal will compare the list you made with the programs', and this will determine if you guys "matched". During residency training you can take Step 3, but a few folks take it as soon as they finish med school just to get it out of the way.

Length of residency training varies per specialty and program. For comparison, Internal Medicine usually takes 3 years while Neurosurgery takes 7. Fellowship is when you do subspecialty training, and again the number of training years vary. There's also sub fellowship, where you'll be studying for the subspecialty of your chosen subspecialty (it's complicated ik the human body is a shitshow). Fellowship isn't necessary though, it really depends if you see yourself more of a specialist or a generalist. And after all that time and money and tears, you'll become an attending, which I guess is another brand of suffering on its own but at least the pay's better (???) ;-;

Anyway, that's how the US training goes. The names, years, and the cost of training definitely varies from country to country, but I find that med school -> residency -> fellowship/attending pipeline is essentially the same everywhere. Hope this gave you an idea! :D

#ask #anonymous #aside from MD there's also DO schools #they're also doctors but they take different exams from MDs but i'm afraid i don't know much about DO programs #you might try looking into it if you're interested

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whoseyscientist · 2 years ago

Text

BEST BATMAN FICS I’VE READ 3 BRUCE WAYNE FOCUSED

Hihoo Here’s some more crazy good batman fics with a particular focus on the sad angsty man in the bat suit because I love him so! Mix of gen/batfam and shipping stuff cause I just wish him well in life c:

As I was making this list I realised alot of them were one-shots huh the more you know- mix of mainly one-shots and the occasional epic lengths lol

= General/ Batfam =

Nominal

https://archiveofourown.org/works/8613352

Don't ask why Batman is sad unless you're willing to give him the time to consult his spreadsheet.

(legitimately?? funniest batman fic I’ve ever read, one-shot)

The Jason Project

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19899613

Jason had just wanted to see his autopsy report, he had only wanted to know what information Bruce had about his death. And when Bruce hadn't given it to him, he had stolen it. He hadn’t meant to stumble upon the bucket list of a dead child and the footage of a grieving father crossing one item after another off the list.

(^ short, sweet and very emotional)

More Precious Than Gold

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13273611/chapters/30371190

Most dragons sleep on their hoards.

Bruce's hoard sleeps on him.

Or: Bruce is a dragon. Predictably, he hoards orphans.

(so, so goddamn cute, two shot)

Manor-Dad lets me drive the Batmobile

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19002637/chapters/45125308

Bruce had two options when Dick found the Cave. 1) Tell him the truth. 2) Go along with Dick’s excited “You’re dating Batman!” until he figured out the truth.

Several children later Bruce wished he’d gone with option 1) or he wouldn’t have to deal with all his kids believing he and Batman were separate people. Yes, even Damian.

(Unfinished but still so very funny, crazy good fic)

dad time

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20434550

five times the justice league misinterpreted batman's actions + one time they absolutely did not

(Bruce just proudly showing off his kids in League business is so canon lmao, one shot, also this author in general has some quality batfam content legit)

Cingulomania (Sometimes, Dad Needs a Hug)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29690424#main

‘Right,’ Tim said, in the voice he used on missions, ‘we’re going to have to call in an expert.’ * ‘Hey guys!’ Dick said, voice slightly crackly over Tim’s phone speakers. ‘What’s up? I’m not supposed to visit until tomorrow - is something wrong?’ - Something is seriously not right with Bruce. They’re a family of detectives and no one can figure it out. It’s kind of embarrassing.

They’re all starting to get worried. - (Sometimes, Bruce needs a hug.)

(^ Feeding my bruce is touch starved agenda quite nicely, one shot)

A Hero Lost

https://archiveofourown.org/works/40358904/chapters/101096682#workskin

When Jason Todd died on that fateful April day, Bruce was tempted to just... stop. To let the world know he was Batman, and that it'd just lost a hero in Jason Todd.

And so he did.

It didn't keep him from mourning the death of his son.

Or: Bruce quits being Batman in the wake of Jason's death, tells the world who he is, then retires to Montana and slowly finds healing. And when Jason comes back to life six months later, and Talia tells him 'you remain unavenged,' he can't find any evidence to support that, so he goes home.

(^ Truly, truly beautiful, it’s a short read but very much worth it)

In For a Pound Series

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17558375/chapters/41378861

25 is too young to be a Dad. That's what Bruce thought when Talia dropped off this baby she claimed was his. Add to that a jealous 11-year-old Dick, and Bruce has his hands full. What does one even do with a baby? Why does this baby scowl so much? And when on earth is Talia coming back?

(^ Very good series with some very fun batfam shenanigans)

Matches

https://archiveofourown.org/works/8074405

What in the hell kind of name for an alias is Matches?

(one-shot, silly, very funny dialogue- bruce is so awkwardly charming I love it)

= Shipping =

Whoever Falls First

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7679041

"There's more kryptonite out there. When the Superman returns, there's going to be an all-star battle royale in the criminal underworld. Every megalomaniacal freak will want a piece of it so they can get a piece of you. And some of them will manage. They'll weaponize it and won't hesitate to use it against you, and when that happens I will not have you flailing around like an idiot."

aka: Bruce teaches Clark how to fight.

(have I recommended this before? I can’t remember, either way it’s immaculately written, superbat one-shot)

pull out the pin

https://archiveofourown.org/works/42361755

Revulsion curled in Clark’s gut, instinctual and sudden. He knew, without knowing how, that the creature wearing Bruce’s face was not Bruce.

“Oh boy,” Not-Bruce cracked its neck, turning its grin on the rest of the group, “You do not want to be in this head, let me tell you.”

(superbat and sooo good, also do yourself a favour and just read all of this authors stuff, its always a banger)

Dilectus Meus Mihi...

https://archiveofourown.org/works/301669/chapters/482974

Clark Kent has lost all his memories of being Superman, and Bruce Wayne must retrain him in the use of his powers. But his super-powered identity isn't all he's forgotten...

(two shot, fun and sweet, just superbat falling in love again <3)

my body is an orphanage (we take everyone in)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12683415

He can stand in a room with the League members and receive surreptitious glances from each one of them individually, each one of them trying to communicate with the intensity of their eyes some sort of camaraderie with Bruce, us against the world, which would be funny, would be far less bitter and ironic, if he wasn’t so desperate to affirm with each of them in turn, yes, you are my friend, for better or for worse.

So he lets them have sex with him because it seems like that means a lot to them.

(^ ace bruce!- incredibly bittersweet with a very sweet ending, poor bruce man :c)

ship-to-ship combat

https://archiveofourown.org/works/39666915/chapters/99302841

"Clark. What the hell is this," Lois asks, staring at Clark's Bruceman WIP folder. Clark's first instinct is to fly away, but that would still leave his fic on display for her to see. His second instinct is to blast a hole straight through his laptop screen with his heat vision, which isn't much better.

Clark, in an attempt to make some spare cash, unintentionally stumbles into the world of superhero fanfiction, becomes a prolific writer for Gotham's OTP, and tries his best to fend off rival fans who want him to convert to superbat instead.

(^ i really just assume everyones already heard of this one cause it’s just- really well written but its superbat and bruceman(LOL) it’s un-finished but hilarious and surprisingly real and emotional)

as to which may be the true

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7880368/chapters/17998981#main

It isn't difficult to go on in the wake of Superman's death. His resurrection, though, poses a problem—especially when it turns out there's no such thing as the right moment to explain that Martha Kent's obnoxious billionaire friend? Is also the man who tried really hard to shove a kryptonite spear through Clark's face.

(I love post resurrection content it’s so good, superbat)

Nine Tenths

https://archiveofourown.org/works/426785

In which the man who's faster than a speeding bullet is pretty slow on the uptake. Bruce corrects this problem the only way he knows how: by being smarter than the average bat. Stark is more than willing to lend a hand.

(this is so cute, gotta love some jealous superbat, also Clark being the one that hates a random hero for literally no reason is fucking hilarious I love it everytime lol)

Remembering Normal

https://archiveofourown.org/works/11494842/chapters/25786338

Hal Jordan is a totally normal alpha, and definitely NOT gay. At all. Like, even a little. Except there was this once. . .

(steamyy, this author has such an insane grasp on bruce and hal as characters its actually insane, their lvl of dialogue is something I aspire for, batlantern)

Late Night Talks

https://archiveofourown.org/works/34941634

Two-face's new partner looks a lot like Bruce Wayne. Surely that doesn't mean anything...

(Twobat, oneshot and the first introduction I’ve ever had to two face/matches malone)

#there's probably more but I can't think what they might be so this is it for now :p #batman #batman fanfiction #dc #dc fanfics #bruce wayne #batfam fanfiction #batfam fanfic rec #batman fanfiction recs #ao3 #superbat fanfiction #batlantern fanfiction #If I make another one imma find more duke fics- love that kid

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shawtuzi · 3 years ago

Text

Peaches and Coconut

i was high as shit as i wrote this lol.

minors dni obvi 18+ content warnings: mentions of church n god but just a lil bit (erens dad is the pastor lol), SMUTSMUTSMUT, oral (male and female receiving) , penetrative sex, praising, softdom!eren, virginity loss, creampie n squirting, sorta daddy kink? it was said like 3 times idk, barely any plot this is pure filth// word count: 4.7k+

It started off as a normal Sunday. People ushering inside the church to find the best seats, relatives and friends catching up with each other their muffled voices mixing with the organ that played quietly, the kids touching running around in the pews trying to find some form of entertainment until they were brought down to the basement for playtime to not disturb the adults. Everything was normal and on routine. Well everything except you.

Eren was seated in his normal spot; threw pews down from the altar on the left side sitting at the very end. The spots next to him were empty and he was hoping they’d stay that way, and they usually do considering his dad was the pastor and highly suggested he had his space because he was “quite agitated on Sunday mornings.”

He was scrolling mindlessly through his phone until the overwhelming scent of coconut and peach hit his nostrils, he looked up and saw you looking pretty as ever with your pastel pink knee length dress and a pink plaid trench coat to match. Your hair was styled to perfection in a slicked back bun along with a pink headband. “I’m sorry to bother you, are these seats taken?” God your voice. It was sweet like honey making him hang on to every word you said. You had the sweetest smile on your face, cheeks and nose slightly red from the cold weather outside. “No it’s not you can sit here” he gave you his award winning smile flashing his perfect teeth canines poking out. How could he say no to such a sweet face?

“Oh my goodness, great thank you so much! This is my family's first time coming here and we wanted to get good seats. We’re new to the neighborhood” you said, taking a seat next to him, your thighs brushing slightly together. You were very chatty and very open, he liked it tremendously, a small smirk coming onto his face as you continued to talk. “Oh my gosh where are my manners, let me properly introduce myself my name is Y/N” you giggled reaching your hand out to his. “No you’re fine” he chuckled, bringing his hand to envelope your small one in his shaking it slowly, “Eren Jaeger pleased to meet you pretty.” Your cheeks turned from a slight pink to a full blush, you quickly pulled your hand back clasping them together in your lap.

Just as Eren was about to make more conversation with you the service unfortunately started. He internally rolled his eyes as he heard his father speak at the altar for the umptenth time. As the service went Eren kept taking sly glances at you melting on the inside at how innocent you looked hanging on to every word his father was saying. He looked at your parents and from the looks of them he expected nothing less of their daughter; innocent, sheltered, and untouched. ‘This is going to be fun’ he thought to himself.

As the service ended he watched as your parents got up to greet his father as all the newbies in the church did leaving you once again by yourself. “That was incredible and the pastor is amazing isn’t he?” you gushed turning to him. “Yeah he’s pretty great but technically I’m supposed to say that he is my dad after all” he chuckled, eyeing the small cross necklace that hung prettily on your neck. You gasped in awe and it made his smile grow wider you were so fucking cute. “I bet that must be amazing. My dad was the pastor at my old church, I loved helping him during services and volunteering,” you smiled scooting closer to him. Bingo. A sinister smile made its way onto Eren’s face, “oh is that so? Well actually we’re having a Christmas party for the kids and I need some help with decorations, would you like to help me with them?”

“Of course I would, I loved planning stuff for the kids at my old church I-” Eren tuned out, paying attention to not your words, but the way your dress rode up your plush thighs. You looked so soft, so sweet and he bet you tasted even sweeter. You were a virgin through and through he could always spot one from a mile away and you were the epitome of one. His mind started drifting elsewhere, more darker nastier thoughts. He imagined the way you would sound as he lapped at your sweet pussy, slipping a finger into your tight untouched entrance. The way you would be crying for him to stop but cry even harder for him to keep going because the pleasure was too good.

“Eren? Are you okay?” you asked a look of worry washing over your face. He tensed up when he felt your hand on his knee rubbing small circles with your thumb. You were so unbelievably lucky you were in a room full of people or he’d take you right now with no restraint. “Yes I’m fine” he groaned, shifting in his spot feeling his cock start to harden under his dress pants, “what was your question?”

“I asked when we would be decorating silly” you giggled giving his knee a slight squeeze. “Friday after school, I could give you a ride here if you want? You go to Paradis High now right?” Your face suddenly flushed again and you looked down twiddling with your thumbs, “U-um actually I’m homeschooled….” you mumbled toying with the purity ring on your finger. A virgin and homeschooled? You were fucking perfect.

“That’s not a problem, pretty I’ll just pick you up from your house,” he offered, giving you a sweet smile. “R-really? You don’t think it's lame or embarrassing?” you asked, giving him big doe eyes. “Nope, not at all sugar” he chuckled, giving your thigh a firm pat, the way your thighs clenched didn’t go unnoticed at all. Don’t worry my angel you’ll be mine soon enough.

Friday couldn’t have come fast enough but it was finally here. Eren would finally have you all to himself for a couple hours. This entire week you were the only thing on Eren’s mind, you were the first thing he thought of in the morning and the last thing he dreamt of at night. Not to mention he’d been fucking his fist to the thought of you every. single. day. He’d be at the dinner table saying grace with his parents when suddenly an image of you would appear in his head, you underneath the table struggling to cockwarm him in your mouth, tears running down your rosy cheeks and drool dripping down your chin. It always ended the same way; him having to excuse himself while he got off in the bathroom imagining it was you riding him, your tight pussy sucking him in with ease as little whimpers and whines left your swollen lips.

As Eren pulled up to your house you were already outside ready to go and you looked absolutely breathtaking. You were wearing an oversized knit sweater with a black plaid skirt and the cutest fucking thigh highs. You were every mans dream and he intended on making you his and his only. “Hi Eren, it's so good to see you again!” you beamed reaching over the console to give him a warm hug. He nuzzled his face into your neck sniffing lightly. Oh how he’d missed the sweet smell of coconut and peaches. “It’s good to see you too angel ready to go?” he asked and you nodded cheeks turning pink at the nickname. You couldn’t deny he looked amazing as well. His shoulder length hair pulled back into a messy bun strands peeking out of it, along with a plain black hoodie and black sweatpants. So simple yet so handsome.

The whole drive there Eren let you do most of the talking just to hear your sweet voice. “I like your ring where’d you get?” he asked even though he already had an idea of what it was he just wanted to hear you confirm it. “Oh this here? It’s a purity ring my dad got me, you know to save myself for the man I love” you smiled showing it to him more clearly. He pulled the car into the parking lot and turned to you his green eyes boring into yours, “it’s beautiful angel purity suits you very nice” he chuckled grabbing your small hand and ran his fingers over the small diamond on your ring, “you radiate purity quite actually” he smirked bringing your hand up to his lips and leaving a chaste kiss on it. Your hand twitched under the kiss and he chuckled once again, “let’s get inside before we freeze.”

The church was quiet and empty as Eren led you to the basement insisting that you hold his hand so you wouldn’t get lost even though the building was fairly small. Once the two of you got to the basement the smile on Eren’s face immediately disappeared once he saw Jean fucking Kirstien already getting started on the decorations. “What are you doing here?” Eren asked, trying not to sound annoyed that Jean was seriously a walking cockblock. Jean turned around a smile etching onto his face, “Hey Eren! Nothing much, just getting a head start on the decorations, and who is this cutie?” Jean asked, eyeing you slowly and it made Erens blood boil. That was the same look Eren gave you when he first saw you so he already knew what sick thoughts Jean must’ve been thinking. “Oh that's perfect we have some extra help!” you beamed walking over to Jean to help him, “and I’m Y/N by the way so nice to meet you” you giggled and it made Eren sick.

Eren clenched his fist and took a deep breath before walking over to the two of you trying to put as much distance between you and Jean as possible. For a good fifteen minutes it was just you and Jean making conversation while Eren stood to the side seething at the blossoming connection between the two of you, “not on my fucking watch” he growled before an idea hatched in his head. “Oh shit” Eren said loud enough to get your guys’ attention, your eyes widening at his use of language. “What’s wrong Eren?” you asked quickly, walking over to his side to see if he was okay. “Yeah everythings fine but I just realized there’s some extra decorations my dad wanted me to get but I don’t want to leave you here by yourself…I mean I am the one that invited you after all it’d be so rude of me to leave you” he smiled then turned his attention to Jean the smile turning not to innocent, “Jean would you mind picking up some extra things I don’t wanna leave poor Y/N here all alone you understand right?” he said, cocking his head to the side.

“Oh- um yeah sure what do we need?” Jean asked, scratching the back of his neck. He would've said no but everyone knows you don’t tell Pastor Yeager’s son “no.” “I’ll text you” Eren grumbled and Jean nodded silently making his way to the stairs, “I won’t be long” he said to the two of you even though it was more directed at you. As Jean finally made his exit Eren turned his attention to you, his demeanor quickly changing, “tell me something Y/N… do you like me?” your eyes widened at the question and you quickly nodded, “O-of course I do Eren you’re my only friend here” you pouted. Eren just couldn’t help himself, he brought his thumb to your poked out bottom lip softly running his thumb over it groaning when your mouth opened slightly like you wanted to suck it.

“Is that so? Then why were you flirting with my friend? Friends don’t flirt with each others’ friends angel” he chuckled darkly moving closer until you were backed against the table where all the decorations sat untouched. “I wasn’t flirting Eren! I promise! Please don’t be upset with me!” you pleaded tears brimming your eyes. “Oh angel shhh don’t cry” he fake pouted bringing both of his large hands up to cup your cheeks, wiping away the tears that fell. “You wanna make it up to me, yeah?” he asked, inching his face closer to yours. You nodded silently nuzzling your face into his palm, “yes anything for you Eren” you mumbled kissing his palm and Eren swears he could’ve came right there on the spot. “Fuck have you ever kissed anyone before baby?” he asked and you shook your head biting softly onto your bottom lip, “j-just once but it wasn’t like, with tongue or anything” you mumbled embarrassed at the confession. “Would you like to kiss me like that angel?” you nodded quickly and Eren wasted no time bringing his lips to yours.

The kiss started off slow and sweet but gradually got more hungry. Eren nipped at your bottom lip causing you gasp which gave him easy access to slip his tongue into your mouth, moaning at the taste of your strawberry chapstick. “Fuck angel you feel that?” he whispered, pressing his hard cock into your front, you nodded shyly looking up at him with big doe eyes “that’s what you do to me baby, make me so fucking hard I can’t even think straight.” He hissed when you brought your hand down to brush against it making you gasp, “s-sorry did I do something?” you asked, bringing your hands back to your sides. “No, no baby m’just so sensitive it hurts” he pouted grabbing onto his bulge palming himself gently, “wanna make me feel better? Take care of your friend, yeah?” he smiled when you shook your head.

“On your knees pretty c’mon” he whispered, pushing you down onto the rough carpet. He pulled down his sweatpants and boxers down allowing his throbbing cock to spring out slapping against his hoodie, he chuckled when he heard you gasp inflating his ego even more. He was fucking huge. A good seven and a half inches with a prominent vein on the underside that you could’ve sworn you saw visibly pulsing. “I don’t think it’s gonna fit Eren” you whimpered, feeling your panties dampen you were uncomfortably horny, slick making its way down your thighs the longer you stared at Erens cock. “Don’t worry my angel we’ll make it fit, now open up” he chuckled darkly slapping the tip of his cock against your kiss swollen lips. You opened your mouth slightly giving the tip an experimental lick and gasped at the taste, it was salty yet sweet and possibly your new favorite thing to taste. “Mmm you like it baby?” he groaned out watching you kitten lick the tip, “think you can take some more?” you nodded quickly, opening your mouth wider.

He smiled down at you patting your cheek, “such a good girl” he mumbled as you finally took the head on his cock into your awaiting mouth. You stopped quarter of the way already gagging, but before you could pull your head away Eren pushed your head until his cock was fully sheathed in your warm mouth. “Oh fuck-shit!” he moaned, throwing his head back feeling you gag and splutter all over his dick. He was going to take it easy on you since it was your first time, but since you were on a time crunch and you felt too fucking good going easy was out of the question. Eren grabbed your head with both of his hands bobbing your head up and down with force. You brought your hands up to his thighs digging your nails into them until he slapped them away, he stopped your head until only the tip was in, “aht aht baby hands on your lap, be a good girl for me and I’ll make you feel so fucking good I promise” he groaned and nodded obediently placing your hands in your lap.

“That’s a good girl” he praised you patting your head softly, “now make me cum and I’ll give you a reward” he growled shoving your head back down. The only noises that could be heard were Eren’s loud moans and groans along with your gagging. “F-fuck pull your sweater up baby lemme see under there” he choked out and you obeyed lifting your sweater to show your full breasts almost spilling out of your white lace bra. He pulled his cock out of your drooling mouth and continued to jack himself off, spurts of cum falling onto your chest and little on your chin. “Fuck me” he mumbled looking down at you, “get up” he growled but before you could stand he was yanking you up using little strength to place you on the table , paper snowflakes, streamers, and rolls of tape scattering onto the floor. “Look at you so fucking beautiful, all fucking mine” he mumbled more to himself than you. With your shirt still lifted he licked, kissed, and sucked all over your breasts lapping up the cum that was on them, you gasped at the sight clenching your legs, “E-eren please” you whimpered feeling tears brim at your eyes again.

Eren looked up at you green eyes sparkling, “please what angel? Tell me what you want” he smiled, kissing your neck nipping at it softly. Your brain was on overdrive, there was so much happening and you knew it was wrong, god did you know it was wrong but it felt so good. The way he sucked at that special spot below your ear making you let out the prettiest sounds. “Want you to touch me…down there” you mumbled feeling your cheeks heat up. He removed his head from your neck, bringing his hand under your skirt rubbing your thigh, “right here?” he teasingly asked, rubbing slow circles with his thumb. You shook your head the sexual frustraition making you want to sob, “show me where you want me to touch you” he commanded and you bit your lip shyly taking the hand that was under your skirt and moving it towards your aching cunt. “Ohhh you want me to touch you right here?” he asked using his thumb to rub your clit over your soaked panties. You gasped clutching onto his bicep, “y-yes Eren please touch me right there ‘wanna feel you so bad” you cried out finally letting the tears fall.

“Well since you asked so nicely” he smiled pulling your panties to the side sliding a finger through your wet slit. “Fuck angel you’re so wet is this all for me?” he asked in a sickeningly sweet tone. You nodded quickly, tears still falling from your mascara smudged eyes, “yes it’s all for you I p-promise” you choked out grinding your pussy against his hand. That was all Eren needed to hear before he was rubbing quick tight circles on your clit, his middle finger prodding at your tight entrance. “Eren!” you cried out digging your nails into his bicep. He slipped his middle finger in and groaned at how tight you were, “shit angel you’re so fucking tight ‘gonna feel so good on my cock, m’gonna fucking split you open” he growled adding another finger and picking up the pace of his movement.

The squelching of your cunt got louder and louder and Eren knew exactly what was coming. Literally. “Eren I feel funny w-wait” you moaned grabbing onto the hand that was under your skirt but Eren just slapped your hand away, “it’s okay baby I got you let go cum on daddy’s fingers” he whispered sweetly in your ear biting gently onto your lobe. “Oh-!” before you knew it you were cumming all over Eren’s fingers, your legs shaking violently at the new feeling you just discovered. “There you go baby, just like that cream all over my fingers you’re doing so good I’m so fucking proud of you” he groaned grabbing the back of your neck and pulling you into a kiss, but this wasn’t like the other one; it was messy full of teeth and tongue and you honestly preferred it over the sweet and sensual way.

Eren pulled away a line of spit connecting your lips, “you did so good angel” he praised removing his hand from your skirt completely covered in your cum. He bought his middle finger to his mouth and moaned at the taste his eyes rolling back, “and you taste amazing too, go on taste yourself love” he whispered tapping his ring finger against your lips, you immediately latched onto the digit rolling your tongue over it until all your cum was cleaned up. “Taste good pretty?” he asked and you nodded a small smile coming onto your face, he chuckled at your reaction and kissed you softly rubbing his hands soothingly over your thighs. “You want some more? Want daddy to make you feel good again?” he queried and you nodded quickly making his heart flutter, “okay take off your sweater and lean back for me baby.”

You bit your lip softly and removed your sweater along with your bra making Eren let out a guttural groan, “fuck you are so fucking beautiful” he mumbled grabbing your breasts in his rough hands grazing your nipples with his thumbs making you whimper, “now lay back for me angel.” You laid back against the table, your back arching slightly from the cool temperature. Eren swiftly pulled your panties off and tossed them aside making a mental note to grab them later and keep them for himself. He cursed under his breath once he finally saw your dripping pussy, “fuck you’ve got the prettiest pussy I’ve ever seen.” The nasty comment made you cover your face but Eren was quick to move them shaking his head, “eyes on me doll.”

Eren wrapped your legs around his waist gripping his leaking cock and tapped the tip against your swollen clit. “You ready for me, pretty baby?” he asked and you nodded, “yes Eren please make me yours, ‘wanna be your good girl forever, w-wanna marry you” you whimpered moving your hips up against his cock. “Don’t worry baby m’gonna make you mine, gonna fucking breed this pussy” he growled before slowly pushing in the tip making you gasp loudly.

“Shh shh it’s okay baby I know, I know I got you” he cooed, kissing away your tears, “don’t worry my angel I’m gonna make you feel so good” he promised nuzzling his head into your neck kissing it softly. After sliding in inch by inch he finally pushed all the way in, “Eren!” you screamed, gripping onto his shoulders. You’ve never felt so full in your life and it was a painful stretch at first but the pain subsided once Eren started rubbing quick circles on your clit. “Ready for me to move?” he asked breathlessly, trying his hardest not to cum already. You nodded whimpering, burying your face into his neck inhaling his cologne, “y-yes please move daddy please!” you pleaded and Eren didn’t need to be told twice slowly moving his hips, his heavy balls patting softly against your ass.

You threw your head back moaning softly, “oh my g-” you cut yourself off biting down harshly onto your lip drawing blood. Eren chuckled darkly picking up his pace, “go ahead and say it he’s listening” he taunted which only made you moan louder. He grabbed your right hand and took your ring finger into his mouth, sliding the purity ring off with his teeth and setting it aside. Your eyes widened at the sight, you should’ve slapped him from removing such a sacred thing your father gifted to you but it was also the hottest thing you’ve seen in all your eighteen years of living.

“Don’t think you’ll need that anymore huh?” he giggled picking up the pace of his hips slamming into your weeping pussy. He stood up straight bringing your legs over his shoulders before continuing his brutal pace, his bun had completely fallen out, beautiful brown locks cascading down his shoulders. He looked like he was carved from the gods, gorgeous tanned and toned body, huge arms that bulged every time he thrusted into you, but your favorite was his blissed out face as he fucked you. The way his eyes fluttered shut every time you clenched around him or the way he bit his plump lips and clenched his jaw, it was almost too much for you. Scratch that it was too much for you.

“E-eren I’m gonna-” you cried out back arching off the table as you came all over his cock liquids spraying all over your thighs and his abdomen. “Oh fuck” he yelled not stopping his movements, “who knew my prettly little angel was a squirter?” he laughed pulling his cock out and slapping your clit making you jump. “E-eren I don’t think I can keep going” you whimpered trying to shut your legs but he just pushed them back open again. “You can and you will because you wanna make me happy right? Wanna make me feel good like I’ve been making you feel good?” he asked in that sweet voice of his that makes you melt internally. “Okay I guess-” before you could even finish Eren slammed back into you literally knocking the air out of your lungs.

“Mmm that’s right my good girl taking her daddy’s cock so well, maybe I won’t take you to get a Plan B and just breed you here all. fucking. night.” he growled pounding into you harder during the last three words. “You’d like that wouldn’t you? Carrying around my babies in your belly, fuck I bet your tits would get so big from the milk I’d drink from them everyfuckingday” You couldn’t even talk too drunk on his cock to come up with a response, all you could think about was Eren Eren Eren. Eren’s thrusts got sloppier and his moans got louder, “oh shit I’m gonna cum baby I’m gonna cum in your pretty little pussy oh my god” he groaned out finally hitting his release. Ropes of cum filling your womb so much it was leaking out of your poor abused pussy.

“S-so full” you whined clenching around Eren’s cock making him groan. “Fuck I know baby. I don’t think I’ve ever cum that much before” he chuckled slowly pulling out of your cunt watching your releases spill out of your beat up pussy. He leaned down licking and slurping up as much as he could, moaning at the taste. “No no no please” whimpered trying to push his head away. He stood up straight grabbing you by your throat and pulling you towards his face, “open” he mumbled and you obeyed sticking your tongue out like the good little girl you were. He spit the mixes of his cum and yours onto your tongue and you quickly swallowed it sticking out your tongue once more to show him and he smiled. “My good fucking girl” he said before kissing you roughly still tasting your releases on his tongue.

“Now let’s get out of here before horseface realizes I lied about getting decorations” he said pulling his sweats up. You gasped and hit his shoulder, “Eren I can’t believe you lied about that that’s not good” you huffed putting your bra and sweater on. You hopped off the table and Eren shook his head chuckling, “oh but what we were just doing was any better?” he teased squeezing your sides. “Oh stop it and where are my- oh here they are!” you smiled reaching for your panties about to put them on until Eren snatched them out of your hand. “I’ll take these for safekeeping” he smirked bringing them to his face taking a long sniff making you gasp. “You’re disgusting” you mumbled feeling your cheeks turn crimson red at the lewd act.

“Yeah yeah now let’s go pretty baby we have the whole day to ourselves” he said wrapping his arms around you kissing your nose. “What about Jean? What if he came back and heard?” you asked pouting and Eren shook his head rolling his eyes, “Jean didn’t hear anything even if he did he wouldn’t say shit, not unless he’s looking for the ass beating of a lifetime.”

Jean in fact did hear which was why he was in the church bathroom fucking his fist to sounds he heard from you and Eren. Maybe Eren would be nice enough to share next time? Who knows you might get lucky angel.

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