#//my parents used to feed me calpol by the bottle when i was sick. like a baby drinkign from a bottle | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

writemekpop · 3 years ago

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Be My Baby | Qian Kun

Pairing: Qian Kun x Reader

Summary: One night, your old flame Kun calls you back to his apartment, to treat his sick baby. The wine flows, and your feelings for him become stronger than ever...

Genre: Dad!Kun, College friends AU, Y/n has a crush on Kun

Word Count: 1.2k

RING RING!

The ringtone made your hand jolt, and the eyeliner wing you were painting smudged. You swore under your breath. But as soon as you saw the name on the dialler your frustration melted away, being replaced by nervous flutters.

You picked up the phone. "Hey, Kun. What's up?"

Kun's voice tumbled out of the speaker. "Hey, Y/n, I'm sorry to call you on a Saturday night but Xia's got a fever and she's red and my car broke down so I can't take her to the hospital and I'm really worried and-"

"Shh, Kun. Breathe,” you said, cutting him off. “Do you need me to come and check-up on her?"

You could hear Kun sigh with relief. "That would be great, Y/n. I'm not messing up your plans for tonight right?"

You thought about the blind date you were supposed to go on. It would be useless anyway; you couldn't date when you were still in love with Kun, your best friend from college.

"No, you're not interrupting anything. I'll be over soon."

Twenty minutes later, and you were knocking on Kun's apartment door.

Kun pulled the door open. When you saw him, you had to force your mouth to stay shut.

Kun was standing there, shirtless, carrying his baby in one arm.

You forced your eyes to steer away from the smattering of black hair that fell into his faded jeans.

"Y/n, you’re here! I'm so sorry, Xia was sick on me and I didn't have time to change. Come inside."

You walked into the living room and placed your medical bag on the coffee table. You fished out your stethoscope and thermometer.

"Put Xia in the cot,” you said. “Let me take a look at her."

"Thank god you're here, Y/n. It's so useful to have a paediatrician as a friend." Kun said, chuckling.

Friend. You tried not to grimace. Instead, you focussed on the child in front of you, pushing your emotions to one side and letting your medical training take over.

The little baby's chubby cheeks were rosy, and her big eyes were glassy. She really was the spitting image of her father. You checked her all over.

Kun came back into the living room, this time wearing a T shirt. Your shoulders slumped in disappointment.

You picked up the baby. "Xia’s okay. It’s just a cold. She should be back to normal in a day or so. I've given her some calpol, just make sure she has enough to eat and drink."

Kun rocked the baby in his muscled arms. "Sorry, Y/n. I must seem like a typical over-anxious parent. It's just hard raising her all on my own, you know."

You touched his arm, ignoring how your nerves danced at the contact. "You're doing amazing, Kun."

Kun beamed, and his glorious dimples came out. "Will you stay for a bit? Let me just put Xia to bed. I feel like we haven't had a proper catch up in ages."

You heart thumped. "S-sure."

Ten minutes later, Kun came into the living room, a glass of red wine in each hand. "I hope you don't mind, I opened a bottle. I remember how much you liked it in college." Kun gave you a teasing smile and passed you a glass.

He sat down on the couch beside you, so close to you that you could feel the heat radiating from his denim clad thigh.

"So, how’s work?" he said. "Are you liking the new hospital?"

"Yes! I really feel like I can make a difference there." You took a large sip of wine. " What about you? Hendery still giving you grief at the office?"

"You know it!" Kun said, pushing his hand through his chestnut hair. "You know... it's so nice to have a normal conversation with another adult that’s not about babies. Don't get me wrong, I love my daughter, but it's nice to have someone else around."

You bit your lip.

Kun's cheeks were flushed - from the wine or his words, you didn't know.

He went on. "You make me feel like... like a person again. Like a man. Not just a nappy-changing-bottle-feeding robot. You’re amazing, Y/n."

You shifted closer, eyes locked on his plump, kissable lips...

You were suddenly overcome with a desire to kiss him. You gripped his T shirt, pulled him towards you and pressed your lips against his.

Kun's froze. His eyes went wide. To your dismay, he wasn’t kissing back.

After feeling his muscles tense, you pulled away. You clasped your hand over your mouth.

Kun was staring at you, mouth agape.

A horrible wave of embarrassment flooded through you. "Oh my god, Kun, I'm so sorry. I didn't even ask-"

"Hey," Kun said, placing a steadying hand on your thigh. "It's okay. You just caught me off guard. Do you perhaps... like me?"

You gulped. "Yes, I… have done for a while. I was going to say something, but then your ex got pregnant and Xia was born and... the timing was never right."

Kun nodded. "Wow. I had no idea you felt that way, Y/n."

When he saw the disappointment your face, he rushed to continue. "Don't get me wrong, you're a total catch! But- but you're my friend, and I’d rather not jinx that. Also, I haven't dated or been... intimate with anyone since Xia was born..."

You blinked furiously, willing the tears away. "It's okay, Kun. I understand. I’m going to go." You stood up.

But Kun grabbed your wrist before you could leave. "Wait, Y/n, don't leave like this."

You sat back down. Your pride was already wounded, how much more damage could five minutes do?

"I'm flattered that you like me, Y/n. And I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought about you like that, in the past. But I'm so overwhelmed with Xia and work... I just don't think I'd make a good boyfriend right now."

You nodded. “Can I ask you something?”

Kun stroked the back of your hand. “Anything…”

“Can we kiss? Just for a bit. Let’s forget about the future or responsibilities… just live in the moment.”

Kun bit his lip, thinking. He really didn’t know how sexy he was. Eventually, he said. “How can I refuse such a beautiful woman?”

You reached forwards and touched the back of Kun’s neck, feeling the stubble of his hair line under your fingertips.

You pulled him towards you, and kissed him on the mouth. His lips were velvety and soft like pillows. When his tongue touched yours, you jolted.

Lips still locked together, Kun lay you down on the couch and shifted on top of you. You could feel his body all over you, smell the faint coconut of his shampoo.

You wrapped your hands around his broad shoulders and pulled him closer. Kun’s hand found its way to your clothed waist. Then his fingers danced up your side and softly touched your breast.

You longed to pull his T shirt off to feel his skin against yours, but then-

“WAAAAAA!”

You both froze.

Kun removed his hand from your breast and sat up. He helped you up to a sitting position on the couch.

Kun took a deep breath and fanned his heated face.

“I better go and tend to her,” he said, smiling apologetically.

You nodded. “I’ll probably get going.”

Kun squeezed your hand. “It’s unfair of me to ask you to wait for me, but I’m going to do it anyway.”

You couldn’t help but laugh. “Okay.”

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MASTERLIST

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privatemessage · 7 years ago

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Jake

After the final email to Mycroft, Greg sat for a moment contemplating the evening. He had never wanted to share Jake’s memory with anyone. His precious 3yr old, snatched so cruelly. But with Myc, he wanted no secrets. He wanted to tell Mycroft how wonderful his son had been. Tonight, over Indian he would share this most important part of himself.

Greg thought back over that time.

Jake.

It’s a boy

Greg had held the 6lb 4oz bundle in his arms. Wrapped in a white hospital blanket, the baby glowed with life and promise. His pink cheeks contrasting with the white of the blankets and his tiny rose bud lips, had Greg falling in love in a heartbeat. He was perfection.

It had been a straight forward delivery, 6 hrs of labour and Greg had been there the whole time, they appeared like the loving supportive family he wished with all his heart they were. Nothing could be further from the truth.

Since the moment. Cindy showed him the two blue lines on the test strip, he had been torn, on one hand ecstatic that at last he was going to be a dad. He also felt a shadow, a cancerous doubt, lingering deep down in his very soul. Is this baby even mine? He had asked the question, after all she had been upfront about the two affairs she had already had. One-night stands, drunken moments.

She had pleaded with him not to leave. Oh god, there were times he wished he had, times where he had been close to packing his bags, but then the voice of his dad telling him what a failure he would always be. No God damn it, he would make this bloody marriage work.

He loved Jake straight away, but he needed to know, needed to know that at some point another bloke wouldn’t turn up and take him away. He couldn’t lose him, not if he was giving him his heart. Jake had been three months old, just three months! Cindy had been tired, well they were both shattered. Cindy begged him to watch Jake whilst she went out for a meal with her friends. He was glad of course, laying bare chested on the sofa with Jake in just his nappy laying close to him. He could have cried. The connection he felt to this little human was astonishing.

Cindy hadn’t returned till 5 am, he would have been fast asleep had he not just resettled Jake after a night feed. Still, he feigned sleep, listening to Cindy strip then rustle in the wardrobe before she slipped in beside him. She stank of beer (she didn’t drink beer) She stank of aftershave (of course she didn’t wear aftershave). When she was fast asleep, in her drunken stupor, he rose and went to the wardrobe pulling out her clothes. Screwed up in the back, clothes that had been secreted away, reeking of aftershave and sex. The blouse dishevelled, buttons ripped off. “The fucking cow she’s fucking done it again, and Jake still so tiny.

Something broke, he broke! He, went into the lounge with the blouse, and put it on the dining table with a note, that simply said, "I want a paternity test, we will visit the clinic today!” Then he made up the day’s bottles, tidied and got ready for his day until Jake stirred. He bathed and dressed him and knew that, regardless of any test result, he wasn’t giving him up. But he needed to know.

Cindy had the right to look sheepish, she came into the lounge after reading his note, the tears already streaming. I’m so sorry, it didn’t mean anything. I just, it just happened. Please, I’m so sorry.” He threw her a glance, â€œGet showered, a friend of mine will do the test, she is discreet, and she owes me a favour.â€.

The test came back. 99.9% positive that he was the father. It was like a rebirth and every free moment he had, he bonded with his boy. His little man. He was Greg’s reason for going to work and earning a wage, his reason from coming home at night.

Greg stopped counting how many times he knew she had been out shagging, he refused to have sex with her any more. He would stay purely for the child, purely to prove his parents wrong. She had no reason to leave, she spent his money, and got sex elsewhere. On the outside, they appeared as a family; inside, his heart was smashed into microscopic pieces.

Then that day, his fucking bed, his bed! He had been called out early to a nasty incident, he should have been working till 9pm, but he stank. He rarely used his home shower to clean up after being at a crime scene but there was going to be a long queue at the station for the facilities, he hadn’t been far, so he had come home. He had heard Jake crying, up in his cot, then he heard, well didn’t need to be a bloody genius to make out what he was hearing. As he pushed his bedroom door open, there they were, she was riding him like a fucking drunken cowboy, and shit, when he saw the PC, he was furious, he was incensed, the arrogant toss pot shagging the bosses wife for God knows how long. He had literally kicked him out of the bed, thrown his clothes at him. And then turned to her. That’s it! I’m filing for a divorce. She cried of course, but all he could say was, “you were fucking one of my PC’s in MY bed, whilst OUR son, was inconsolable in his cot, you are nothing but a whore.”

He had rung the station, told them he had an emergency at home, taken the rest of the week off. Then he had cleared her stuff out, and sent it to her sisters. He had spent the rest of the week trying to work out how he was going to be a single dad.

Of course, no way he could keep her away and Jake became a pawn in some sick game. In the end the only way he could see enough of Jake, was to allow her back home. Jake stayed with her in their house. He moved into the spare room not being able to sleep in their bed again, but he would often come home to find that a neighbour was baby-sitting. Cindy would come back at all hours, yet still she filed for sole custody. Used every trick in the book to try to discredit him. Over the next few years, the routine was the same. It was the family from hell. The only thing that kept him going was that little boy and the hours he got to spend with him.

Then one awful morning, he went to get Jake dressed ready for the day, he had the snuffles, was hot. Greg gave him Calpol, but Jake complained of having tummy ache and started to vomit... He was only three. Three, three years old and his whole life ahead of him. When his temperature had gone up further, Greg had taken him to the doctor. The next hours were awful. Meningitis they said, he’d caught it early, but it was vicious and for two days the virus was rampant in his little body. Then..... Well then it was over their darling boy, his darling boy. Gone.

He went back to work straight after the funeral, it had been a small affair, He had refused to allow anyone from work to be there, hardly any of them knew about Jake anyway, he was fastidiously private about his home life. it was just him, and her. A few very close friends. He hadn’t spoke to Cindy since. He had sold the house, settled finances with her via a solicitor. The PC? Well he asked for a transfer, one day, one day Greg wanted to be there to turn down his only hope of promotion. But for now, the thought of them together in his bed made Greg feel sick.

Now all he had left of Jake was a small box. Full of Jakes tiny life. His birth records. His first sleep suit, his first drawing, photos and some video. Nothing that linked him to his mother.

That box, stowed safely, followed him wherever he went, never opened. But always close at hand. One day, he would share his son’s memory. But for now, he kept his son locked away in his heart.

#content #Jake #child death #grief and loss

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ourdragonflydays-blog · 6 years ago

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Things that have been essential with a newborn

So, my little poppet is 6 weeks old now and I thought I would write a list of those essential things that we really used/learned the first few weeks of his life! (Please take into account this is from my perspective, you might have completely different views due to you circumstance. That’s fine, you do you boo.)

Sleepsuits. So before he was born I imagined myself dressing him in cute trousers and jumpers with little booties and hats. Now the hats and bibs are needed however lots of the cute clothes are just not suitable for a newborn. Not just because changing a nappy is harder to do (I mean I don’t have much else to do in the day so I wouldn’t mind a distraction) but because for my little bean the trousers were simply too tight for his little tummy and this caused gas. Which brings me to my next point...

Anti-Colic techniques. I naively thought babies slept, pooed, looked around cutely and then slept some more. Did you now sometimes they cry for seemingly no reason at all? For sometimes hours? That you can’t stop? It sounds like a nightmare doesn’t it? Thankfully our child has not been too colic-y but this is a real thing and no-one really knows what causes it. None of the grannies I spoke to in the street mentioned this when I was pregnant!! But we found a few things that seem to work - the first is try to get rid of all gas. This is usually through burping and making sure the baby is upright when feeding and not sucking in air when taking the boob/bottle. (Our son has moved from breastfeeding to bottlefeeding and both created the same amount of gas so I wouldn’t worry about that.) Again, just wearing sleepsuits has really stopped any pressure on his tummy and make sue they have the right sized nappy (you should be able to comfortably fit two fingers under the waistband). We also have set up a nightly routine of bath, bottle and bed at around 7pm which helps with the so called ‘witching hour’. The ‘witching hour’ is a mythical name for colic, the crying at evening time. Babies are crazy and seem like they are in pain for this time - pulling their legs to their chest, getting red in the face and crying regardless of what you do. Now this was very testing (still is) for my husband and I and in the first few weeks this caused me a lot of anxiety when the end of the day rolled around. Following some anti-colic tips have really reduced the amount this happened but when it does there are some medications you can use to help the baby with this. We tried Infacol (which didn't work for us), there is gripe water which is for 3 months onwards but we found our saviour to be... Dentinox Colic Drops!! They seriously work for us but we like to use them as a last resort. They basically work to combine all the small little bubbles in your babies tummy together to work out as a burp or a fart. We use it sparingly because the baby acts like i’ve poured vinegar down his throat and it hurts my soul when he cries like that.

Drugs. No, not those kinds. The medication type. The little sausage got his first cold when he was 3 weeks old and he could barely breathe (somewhat due to the button nose inherited from his father...)! This was a new hurdle for us, especially as my husband went back to work on this week and the cold meant sleeping was very tricky for the babe unless he was lying on one of us. This meant one of us not sleeping to keep an eye on him. Not ideal. We therefore scoured any and every shop and pharmacy for ways to relieve him of his snot! Being so young he couldn’t take calpol or any kind of paracetamol/ibuprofen so we were left with saline drops prescribed from the doctor. Have you ever tried to get a drop of liquid down a squirming newborn, and inherently tiny, nose? Its a lot of fun. We did find in an ASDA calpol saline spray suitable from birth which actually sprays the saline up their nose. This worked well. We also bought a nasal aspirator. Technically we bought two ... initially bought one from mother care which you pushed down and then released when it was in his nose. Don’t buy it! it doesn’t work! I also sterilised outs which rendered it useless so also don’t do that. I did then make another dash to Tescos and bought the type that is a long tube that give you images of sucking up and eating the snot...which worked really well for getting out the snot. My husband was better at it than me because he has the lung capacity of something with large lungs. Quite satisfying as well got to be honest seeing the snot in the tube. We also bought vapour oil to put in a bowl of warm water. Not sure if this did anything. Smelled lovely though.

Money Being 24, and on fairly low income my husband and I want to spend the least amount of money possible. The chick’s clothes are usually secondhand, he has Tescos own nappies, we buy the average formula, Ikea everything, we look out for deals on wipes etc. That being said there are a few things that we ended up forking out for that I think were really worth it. (side note - something that was not worth the £50 was an automatic breast pump which was painful, time consuming and really noisy and impossible to sell secondhand!) Cot - We started out with a secondhand moses basket which was £5 and I thought would be good enough. Here are the reasons why it wasn't: it was really difficult (and painful!) to lower him into from the bed, didn’t rock anyway, was a pain in the arse to clean and he didn’t like because when he flung his arms out in his sleep (newborns do this did you know?) they would hit the sides. We therefore ended up forking out nearly £200 on a bedside crib to co-sleep in the bedroom safely. Here are the reasons why it is better: It doesn’t pull my stitches to put him down into it, I can check his breathing easily, it can adjust to different levels and be raised at one end when he is poorly, he likes it better, it will be easier for him to adjust to his cot as it is bigger and it looks nicer. Bottles - I am not trying to start a discussion, everyone is different and has their own reasons for how they feed their baby. At 3 weeks old we moved from breast to bottle feeding. We decided to buy a perfect prep machine from Tommee Tippee which dispenses the perfect temperature water. It is £100 new and we paid £20 for it on Facebook marketplace and then an extra £10 for a new filter. It is amazing. In the day it works well and saves the hassle of the kettle but I don’t know how I would survive at night without it. I am like a bear - you are brave to wake me. So the 3am feeds are hard for me (but mostly my poor husband because of my vile demeanour). The perfect prep means that I can have a bottle ready in 38 seconds (i’ve counted) and I am usually back to bed in 20 minutes. Side note - I also got a £1 Avent microwave steriliser from a nearly new sale which is a godsend. Pram - I have no way of comparison here with this being my first baby so take this with a pinch of salt but my family has the tradition that the parents (my mum and dad) buy the first born’s pram. I therefore asked for the best and got the SilverCross Wayfarer travel system. it was about £800 (Thanks mum!). I use this thing every day and it never fails to make me happy. It is just so intuitive and easy! The buttons are all where you think they will be, the joining parts all work easily, the car seat is safe and sturdy, the isofix is easy to install, the bassinet is very cute, the raincover is easy to put on, the cup holder holds starbucks etc. There is literally nothing I dislike about it except I wish I could be pushed around asleep and be fed on demand. A Washer/Dryer - What? No not traditional put-on-your-registry baby item but do you know how many times you will be pooed, weed and sicked up on in one day? sometimes all at the same time? this would be fine in the summer but good lord if I didn’t have the capacity to dry the washing we would literally have nothing to wear. Also, fuck the clothes horse. I used that thing for 2 years and it doesn’t dry the clothes and makes the room all damp. The washer dryer was £300 and my dear husbands father got it for us. I love it (and him). A Baby Swing - Do you ever need to poo? Have to eat? Need to put on a bra to answer the door to the postman? These are the times that the baby swing is important. The baby also loves it and sometimes would rather be in it than on me. He loves the mobile that hangs above his head and is a safe place to put him if you need a breather. My mum again got it secondhand for £80. Worth every penny.

Cameras This is pretty self-explanatory but already looking back at him when he was first born is so lovely and they change so much. Take all the photos - awake, asleep, naked, clothed, covered in excrement, crying, at the doctors etc. You will forget in your sleep deprived state and they change before your eyes. I love the photos we have of him and will cherish them forever.

Muslins see - Sick. Poo. Wee.

Baby Baths I love having bath myself so its only natural my son loves it too. We have a little baby bath that fits into the main bath and cradles him safely. I then get in the bath with him and my husband pours water over him (and me!) while I use baby soaps to wash his little body. This is such a special time for us, we are all working together, usually smiling and laughing, with lovely smells and skin-to-skin and calming down after the day. This so far is my favourite part of being a mother.

Patience This is not just patience for the screaming ball of flesh that wakes you up at god-knows when covered in god-knows what. This is patience with the life you have now. You cannot poo when you want to. You aren’t in control of your day anymore girl! All those hours blissfully bored when you were pregnant are a million miles away. You are responsible for this little person and this little person’s needs mean you can’t sleep through the night, or have a whole bottle of wine, or take a relaxing bath, or do the food shop without timing it just right or really have the life you had before. And dealing with that change takes patience. Patience with yourself and the emotions that come with managing the change (fear, regret, longing, exasperation...). Patience with your husband who gets to leave and spend a few hours at work without the baby. Patience with the people in the supermarket who walk in front of you (they don’t know how stressed you are). It is hard. No-one will tell you it’s not hard. Or not to feel those things. But give yourself credit. You’re doing it, you can do it, you have already done it, and with a bit of patience you will learn to get through it. It will get easier.

Netflix Good lord its boring home on your own. There are only so many times I can hoover and clean before I lose my mind. But it is so stressful leaving the house that sometimes it’s just not worth it. Netflix is amazing because there is so much available and I can choose what I want to watch holding the remote while feeding the baby!

Support I don’t mean a good bra (but always necessary)! The people around you make the hard days that bit easier. Me and my mum are very close anyway and she is self-employed and so it’s great to have someone who is available in the day to go and see. My husband and I also try to go for a walk every night to make sure we spend some time talking to each other and doing something other than baby care! I have also found some mother and baby groups to be good - it might be worth looking around though because some are very toddler heavy / not very baby friendly ! My sister also made us some food for the freezer which has been great (especially on those growth spurts!) and my granddad has been very good in giving us tomatoes from the allotment. Reaching out and talking is so important to keep yourself from becoming isolated and its something that I still need to remember.

KY Jelly (or water-based lube) Pretty self explanatory. After the bleeding it is dry down there. I mean sahara dry. And I don’t just mean use it for sex. Some days it was just necessary for daily use. And the last one for now:

Teamwork Myself and my husband are so lucky and thankful for our baby. We know how hard it is for some people and not everyone gets to be parents so we are incredibly grateful. That being said it is without a doubt the hardest thing we’ve done together. The best days have been the ones where we have worked as a team. Unfortunately it is very easy to snap and take your frustration out on the closest person. We have been working hard to make sure we talk explicitly about how we are feeling and work together to make solutions. If it gets hard I try to remember that it’s us against the problem. My husband is my rock and I could not do it without him. I try to tell him this as often as possible and him to me.

Wow, you’re still here? You deserve some kind of award. Thank you for reading, I hope it was helpful.

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