#//i spent too much time on this

[phasmascript]

Indie Multimuse/fandom blog written by Luci!

Muses/Rules

[theodosiani]

If You Were A Worm

Sive: No, worms are disgusting

Liora: She would say yes and not think about it but the next time she's drunk enough she would cry about how she can't protect a worm. They'd just wriggle away and then she wouldn't be able to figure out which worm was her love and which was just a worm so she'd have to bring them both home and love a handful of worms and that's too much.

Rosalind: Why would you be a worm? Did you do something to piss of Morrigan? Do you need help?

Alethea: Yes, and she would write sad wormy poetry about you.

Varania: She would say no but she would still love you.

Shokrakar: This is a strange thought exercise and she stopped doing those when she left the Qun. Ask her again when you are a worm and she can decide then.

Ghilan'nain: Yes, and she is the reason you are a worm. A worm cannot leave her.

Frauke: She's already making a nice terrarium, just in case.

Cosima: No, but she would protect you. Bring you someplace that worms could be happy and let you free.

[orxna]

Please blame @starkhvn for how much I have been thinking about this.

SO, the whole concept of pardoning turkeys is a relatively new one, only in the last 100 years HOWEVER, Thedas has a LOT of anachronistic aspects so we're gonna just go with it and logic out the, well, logistics.

So the gifting of birds to the president used to be a thing done by independent farmers, usually local to the area the president was from or otherwise known to him who would compete for the honor, until it was taken over by the Poultry lobby. Generally, several birds were given, there was some pomp and circumstance about receiving them, and it was over. The first 'pardoned' turkey wasn't properly pardoned in the sense that ones ones today are(often sent to petting zoos at historical sites), it was actually selected for being such a magnificent bird it was decided to 'keep him going' ie, send him back to the farm for breeding stock.

NOW WITH CONTEXT MOVING ON TO WHAT'S RELEVENT TO THEDAS

I would say that it would be reasonable to have it once have been dependent farmers of the given region (Starkhaven or Serault in these cases) to have given their prized bird to their lordship for First Day UNTIL the 'honor' was decided to be too great for peasants and nobles muscled their way in to use the event as a way to curry favor.

Now Starkhaven is easy, all gobblers look pretty majestic regardless of breed if we're being honest. So there it would probably be more of a deal to just have the Biggest Tom Possible. A broad bested bronze would be a good, maybe a blue slate turkey if you want a more striking color but you really can't go wrong.

CHICKENS HOWEVER, the thing about a chicken who is going to be an aspect of a ceremony is that simply Cannot use a meat bird if the point is to pardon the best bird to send back for breeding stock. Meat birds are Simply Boring to look at I'm sorry but it's true. This is ORLAIS you think they want a boring ass bird up there being pardoned for good behavior and good looks? No, they want something Goddamn Majestic.

So my proposal is that Orlais just goes buck fucking wild and uses the Big Boys. Now, there's a few options here if you want to go for sheer size paired with a really majestic plumage, which I think Orlais would. So I offer three options, the Brahma, and Indio Gigante, Jersey Giant which I will be renaming Antiva Giants because I think they are the New Jersey of thedas.

I'm partial to brahmas because my roosters are Brahmas and Leeroy and his son Killroy are Good Boys. However, Indio Gigante's simultaneously look cool and stupid which really gives them that Orlais Spirit. 'Antiva' Giants are a little too sweet tempered to fit in my imagination of this event and also Orlais doesn't deserve them.

Anyway for the reference the birds referenced in this post are

Broad Breasted Bronze Tom

Blue Slate Tom

Brahma Rooster

Indio Gigante Rooster

Jersey Giant Rooster

Bonus Appearance, my boys Leeroy and Killroy

[asphodelles]

drew that short italian guy from dragon age you guys like

[icarus-suraki]

Is this anything?

[feathered-serpents]

"Husk would be jealous of Angel's work-" Nah bro this is the vibe

[alexandriad]

🏺🏺

[gravitcat]

Caitlyn Kiramman

[yarrowdraws]

very late to the meme, it's been done before but. here.

turn on the sound pls

[galaxyspeaking]

With her eyes closed, Lady Galadriel seemed peaceful, as if asleep—

[ruviart]

😥💔

[jeonseoguu]

when the sibling rivalry goes too far

COMMISSIONS ARE NOW OPEN !!! check my pinned post for more details ⭐️

[toseeclearly]

YOU, A REGULAR PERSON: Pink Witch King of Angmar

ME, AN INTELLECTUAL: nazgUwU

[gelly-art]

The phrase "Astarion, you ignorant slut" entered my mind a week ago and hasn't left since and that's the only reason this exists.

[bunabi]

this is what he is (to me)

[theodysseyofhomer]

spare thought for the enslaved shepherds in greek mythology/tragedy who rescue the exposed doom babies... sometimes they know why the baby was left to die, sometimes they don't. they just — it's a baby. no one else wants it. you can't leave it here. what harm could it do. it's a baby. you want it to live. it's a baby