#//but also rlly this just?? i love this piece so much. he is beauty he is grace he's gonna zanpakuto ur face

[seiwas]

i have so much to say about this fic and don't know where to start!!!

(long blabber of my thoughts under the cut!!)

sera, you opened this with such a strong introduction to one of my favourite themes when it comes to gojo: how much of him is man? monster? (human? god?).

a feeling of deep and solid peace had settled over him as he hacked through bodies, as if that was what he was meant to do. he already confused the ever thinning boundary between man and monster. that bloodshed brought him such euphoric tranquility could only mean it was growing worse.

this whole interaction with shoko was so interesting to me because of how gojo tries to chase back that feeling. war can do many things to people, but for it to be intriguing enough that gojo goes to shoko to lowkey re-experience dying like it's drug therapy shows how borderline insane he actually is!! it tells so much about his character too—that obsessive part of him that doesn't stop until he gets what he wants or figures shit out.

that being said, one of my favourite things about your knight!gojo series is how seamlessly you integrate the characters into this new world, with your very own (fleshed out) lore. your mind, sera!!

the relationships between the houses (especially the royal family and the gojos); who's noble, what they're known for, reminds me of all the things i love about series like game of thrones/house of the dragon!

i remember a scene from the first time you posted knight!gojo, the one of gojo and tsukumo dancing, and love it just as much as the first time i read it!

gojo’s looking at you. your cheeks heat with his attention. his stare is intense, eyes half-lidded. every move is prowling, almost predatory. his eyes remain fixated on your face as he and yuki move in a complicated, sinuous series of circles. there’s something impossibly filthy about his gaze. it borders on indecency, combined with the way he barely seems to be paying attention to dancing, giving you all of his focus instead.

when gojo stares at you so intensely while dancing with her, it really does feel like something rated r without actually being rated r, and that boggles my mind!! how you can do that sera!! the tension!!! how you can convey that through your writing!!

i love the characterisation, not just individually but in every dynamic too!

shoko is so witty and snappy, and i love how you characterise her, sera. not just in this fic, but even in your other works like cruel summer! she always adds so much sass to everything.

i also love how you included gojo's mother, which isn't something we really get to see in a lot of gojo fics. a lot of the time she's portrayed as an absentee parent, but i like how gojo has at least some form of affection for her here.

when getou came in to save princess from naoya, i scREAMED omg thank fuckin god!!! you wrote him so respectfully too, like how he wouldn't even touch princess' dress 🥺

then there's utahime! i've always loved how you write utahime (especially in cruel summer) and i love her all the same here! the relationship she and the princess share is so precious, and how princess regards her and feels bad that she's put in harm's way makes me 🥹 it comes to show how much heart you've put into the princess, sera, and i adore that!

why do the people around you insist on destroying themselves for your benefit? 

this line is one of the reasons i love the way you write the princess; the themes around her are so devastatingly tragic, i really feel so bad for her sometimes. there's so much expectation of her to live up to a role she was never prepared for, along with the fact that she has to satisfy her duties as princess—being a woman in that world, too. it's also another thing that she has to live with the fact that literally every person she loves becomes expendable for her sake (she is literally their dying cause). the way you write her really makes me ache!

she has all this, and then all her wants, but truly chooses to be practical about it. like she is so painfully aware of what she has to do that she finds no point dreaming otherwise (even though she so badly wants them). sometimes, i think that she constantly has to remind herself of it just so she believes it :(

if gojo satoru was your husband, no one would dare anything with you, but you chase the idea from your mind as quickly as gojo plants it. you’re your father’s daughter, raised on his practicality. you don’t waste time on pipe dreams. better the hideous truth than a lie costumed in beauty - the bite of thorns was infinitely preferable to the impermanent fantasy of petals.  ... gojo’s mother used to say that the more adamantly someone denied something, the closer to the truth it likely was. you can only hope gojo doesn’t remember, because she was right. the reason you won’t give him even an inch on the topic of marriage is because a proposal from him is the only thing you want but can’t have.  ... if you let him in for one second, you can imagine how easy it would be to never stop. he’s every one of your desires and hopes made manifest, tied up in a single person. ... thorns, not petals, you remind yourself. you can suffer the truth. 

there's a part that literally made me go:

but gojo knew you before you grew into the woman you are now. he still remembers how to pull smiles and tears from you, how to push you to the brink of exasperation and coax you into brilliant happiness. He has a key to all the gates you’ve erected. no matter what you do, he always slips past your defenses.  if you keep letting him do as he pleases, you’ll be the only one who loses. gojo is a man. If he’s rumored to be attached to the princess, it’ll elevate his reputation. he’s already the best swordsman in the entire kingdom. being thought of as a profligate would only make them worship him more. people love a little hint of degeneracy to their heroes - not too much to make them immoral, but enough to make them attainable.  a princess is not a hero. you’re not someone to attain, you’re someone to obtain. when people look at you, they only see the crown. if you’re thought of as a ruined woman, it would prevent you from finding a husband. it would destabilize the entire kingdom.  it hurts to realize that you’re that selfish. gojo would’ve chosen you over anything, but you’re letting something as empty as reputation displace him.  not that it’s exactly a choice. your life has been forfeit since you were born. you don’t belong to yourself, but to the royal house. as the only child of the king, you can’t allow yourself any mistakes, not when even the barest twitch of your fingers is scrutinized. 

reading it just stunned me completely! i love it so much because it touches on all the parts that make me feel so much for the princess. the burden placed on her is so heavy and there are so many things she has to consider.

you also add so much depth when you discuss how princess feels towards her father, because is it his fault he wasn't able to raise her? when he was grieving himself? can the princess truly blame him for that? honestly, i have mixed views about that too because the situation really is so complex.

you have such a gift, sera! creating a character that is so raw, so much so that readers ache for them and feel for them in the way that i managed to feel for the princess.

and don't even get me started on the dynamic between princess and gojo 😭 the push and pull is so strong; how they are equally so protective of each other, probably equally as jealous about others too. there's the teasing and the tension, and i just ugh! no words to even describe how much i love them together. you did such a wonderful job making me fall in love with them, sera 😭 gojo is so tender with princess and it makes my heart ache every time!

i don’t trust him, and especially not with you.” his hand smoothes over a stray ruffle on your petticoat, the gesture impossibly loving. “never with you, princess.”  ... he makes you feel at ease to speak freely without fearing how much you’ll reveal of your own vulnerabilities.  ... “then marry me,” he says softly. “marry me and be done with all of this. they don’t deserve you, anyway. they won’t treat you like I will.”  you close your eyes, feeling the telltale hotness of incoming tears burn behind your eyelids. why did he do this to you? he was so gentle it hurt, even though you knew he was capable of terrible things. somehow that made it worse, the knowledge that he was choosing to be kind. 

there's an exchange in the ballroom, the one where princess tells gojo to find another partner and he so firmly says he doesn't want to, that he doesn't care if people talk—and my heart reading it 🥲 i think the way you write gojo here is so desperately stubborn because all he truly cares about is the princess. it's echoed later on too, in the gardens when gojo tells the princess to take him in any way, he just wants to be next to her always 😢

there's also the assassination attempt! when princess thinks she's about to die and the last thing she wishes is to say goodbye to gojo. i love the entire exchange afterwards because it's truly one of the things i love about them—their lives are so different, shaped by the experiences that their positions have put them in but gojo never really makes her feel bad for being a princess. he never belittles her for the things he's used to but she isn't, and he just takes care of her, tenderly, gently, like handing her the cloak to wipe with should she vomit, like getting her silk slippers before letting her feet touch the floor (like who does that!!! omfg!!! gojo the man that you are!! sera the writer that you are making gojo the man that he is!!), like waiting for her and guiding her gently so she doesn't step on any blood (even lifting her up 😭). my heart was melting the entire time!!

the tournament also reminded me so much of that scene from house of the dragon! some of my favourite parts were:

at the end of their round, getou smiles even as gojo brings him to his knees. 

because it reminded me of satosugu in real 😭😭😭

he kneels - not to your father, but to you. 

because i got butterflies reading it for real!! his devotion omfg. and it's so cute too, how passing notes in secret is a thing for them.

that final scene in the garden had me crying too! the moment is so intimate, and the princess really loves him wholly and purely. gojo brings her crushed flowers and i still find it to be the cutest thing in this entire world 😭 then this:

“if not marriage, then knighthood. let me be yours, in whatever way i can have you.”  “you have me,” you tell him. “you always have.”

i'm crying 😭😭😭 gojo's devotion is so pure, and the princess' love for him is so pure too!! because she actually feels bad that he's devoted so much of himself to her at his own expense 😭

when i read this i really bawled:

gojo has been your dedicated shield for so long, the two of you have forgotten a life where he wouldn’t give up everything to protect you. he’d do anything for you - even that which he should hold sacred for himself. his very body is littered with scars that he’s received on your behalf. how much more can you take from him?  does gojo really want to marry you or does he want to protect you? will he play the part of the devoted servant for the rest of his life?  “you don’t have to…” you realize you don’t know how to say it. or that you don’t want to. selfishly, a part of you can’t bear to release him from the oath he gave you when you were children, though he couldn’t have known. neither of you could have understood what it meant for him to kneel at your feet and swear his life to you. it had all been in good fun, the way children understand things. “i don’t want you to- oh, satoru. you don’t owe me anything. you’ve done enough for me.” 

when she asks about the difference between wanting to marry or wanting to protect 😭 all the scars he's accumulated bc of her 😭 the fact that reader is willing to let him go, to set him free because he's done enough for her already aw mAN! i think truly, they both just love each other too much 😭😭😭😭

more lines that really made my heart hurt:

silently, you beg your tears not to fall. the way he disarms you is humiliating. you turn away, but gojo understands. years of watching after you has taught him a lot. he bandaged the scrapes that you refused to cry over and avenged your honor after you pretended your pride hadn’t been hurt. he can see right through you. “please don’t.”  ... you see the frustration on his face. he’s not a man used to holding himself back, and yet he does.  “it’s alright,” he says. “we can wait.”  it’s just another number to add to the tally of favors you owe him. 

and that scene at the end with yaga!!! i loved that so much from the first time i read knight!gojo too 😭

it's clear that gojo is so lovesick, he's a fool!

he was a soldier, so he had long since rid himself of the ability to lose his breath, but if he still could, he would’ve choked at the sight of her when he broke past the doors. 

how he cuts his little trip in shoko's lab and even hurries down the corridor just to get to the princess, how he's proud to protect her (to be the dragon that keeps people away), how he think she's so beautiful. it's the small things—how he rushes through the corridor, bites his lip to fight down a smile. he's so lovesick!! like the princess is his biggest damn crush and the love of his life!! (she probably is 😭).

when it comes to the princess, gojo drips with devotion and i find it so genius that it parallels so well with his position as knight. knights swear their devotion to their sovereign, just like gojo swears his devotion to the princess. and i'm not sure if that's something you meant to explore, sera, but regardless, it was so satisfying for me to uncover it. your beautiful mind!!

some of the lines that made me 😫 and think: gojo simp (for real felt these in my stomach)

wherever you were, he would always find you.  ... “don’t underestimate the things i’d do for the smallest sign of joy from you." ... “don’t make that face,” he says. “i’d marry you. if it came down to it, i’d take care of you.”  ... gojo’s mother had him trained in elegant cursive that he uses for formal documents and letters. In his messages to you, it degenerates into chicken scratch. it’s a lucky coincidence that it’s all but unreadable to anyone else, making it a code only you can decipher.  ... “i don’t care,” he says. “you’re what’s most important to me. more than pride, more than honor.” 

ultimately, your writing is, as always, just so beautiful, sera! i have too many favourite lines, but for sure the ones i featured here are some of them! literally had to stop myself from almost copy/pasting your entire fic when i was deciding what lines i liked best (and even then, i still listed down a lot 😭). i am always so fully engrossed in your works, and i am so immensely grateful for the amount of thought, love, and care you put into writing knight!gojo again! it's one of my favourites, truly :')

Act One, Chapter One: half agony, half hope

Knights are bound by duty and honor, but Gojo is more devoted to his princess than he ever was to his oaths.

Main Masterlist | AO3

wc — 10k

tags — royal au, knight gojo, princess reader, forbidden love, ballroom scene, dancing, court politics, blood, minor character death, period-typical misogyny, complicated relationships with fathers, secret meetings, flouting social etiquette by sneaking out to meet your childhood best friend who is also your loyal knight, title from Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

Next: the beginning of devotion (coming soon)

He was so still Shoko almost mistook him for a dead body. It was a common misunderstanding in her line of business, but not one she was usually startled by. As a poisoner, legally and officially a herbalist, the occasional corpse on her table wasn’t such an unexpected occurrence. A lord, on the other hand, was. 

Especially if it was him.   

Gojo Satoru wasn’t just a lord. He was the son of the former Hand of the King, the greatest swordsman in living history, and connected to the princess. There wasn’t a man alive who didn’t know the Gojo name. It was synonymous with the royal house itself as the clan that had produced scores of advisors to the king. In nearly every generation, the heir to the throne was accompanied by a Gojo, acting as a living sword and shield. 

But even with that storied history, this one was special. A young man who had risen to prominence during The Silent War, he returned home from hell as a knight unlike any other. The bards would adore him. They already did. 

Most generals earned their titles by leading campaigns. Gojo hadn’t needed one. He turned the tides of the war as a single man army. They had started calling him a grim reaper, a god of death. 

Shoko disliked him on principle, but she couldn’t kill a man like that. They’d have her head on a pike. She didn’t mind the idea of dying so much. What she did shrink from was the idea of dying painfully. 

The princess was known for abstaining from most decisions involving the crown despite being in line to inherit it, but Shoko somehow doubted that she would remain so passive if her favorite knight was murdered. Thankfully, Gojo let out a soft breath to show her that he did remain among the living. 

“I thought you died,” she remarked. 

“Sorry to disappoint you.” 

She said something else, but Gojo wasn’t listening anymore. He was floating through a shapeless world again, chasing that moment. It slipped away from him despite his redoubled attempts to capture it. He remembered the tang of iron in his mouth. Blood spraying in the air, a mist that he could smell and taste. The leather grip of his sword in his hands, slippery with sweat. 

He was trying to win back enlightenment, briefly attained and lost again just as quickly on the battlefield. A feeling of deep and solid peace had settled over him as he hacked through bodies, as if that was what he was meant to do. It should’ve concerned him. He already confused the ever thinning boundary between man and monster. That bloodshed brought him such euphoric tranquility could only mean it was growing worse, but he hated things he couldn’t understand. 

He needed to experience it again. Just one more time, so he could make sense of it. The smell of blood. Wading through the dead and the dying, thigh deep in gore - it was no use. Frustrated, he let it go. 

There was something soothing about the cracks in the ceiling. He stared up at it, letting his breaths come as shallowly as they had while he had been immersed in his meditative state. Shoko’s basement was chilly and dark, but it was necessary for the illegal autopsies she performed at his request. Those, and the poisons she crafted for him, were its primary purpose. It was only a stroke of luck that these qualities were also helpful for his attempts to recover his short-lived state of grace. 

He was tempted to try again, but not today. There was someone too precious to keep waiting if he delayed any longer. He wouldn’t impose upon her the way he often imposed on the elder lords who tried to remind him of his place by pulling rank. While they deserved his spite, she didn’t. 

Even Shoko was surprised by his sudden desire for punctuality. “You’re not going to stay?”

“I have a princess to rescue,” he said. “Dragons to slay, things of that nature.” 

Shoko scoffed. “You are the dragon they have to save princesses from.”

Well, Gojo thought as he hurried down the corridor, she wasn’t wrong. He was sure others agreed with her. He didn’t waste his time with children’s tales anymore, but he remembered his mother’s voice whispering to him in the dark, curled around him in his bed. A dragon was a tool to lock princesses away. His presence deterred anyone from coming too near to his princess, so by that definition, he was most certainly a dragon. 

Gojo found that he was a little proud of himself for that. Thinking of his mother had made him nostalgic. He thought she might be proud too, that he had taken such good care of the princess she herself had looked after. A dragon might trap, but it also guarded and hoarded. He had polished his princess like a treasure, lavishing her with attention until she had become a gem. 

She was beautiful. 

He was a soldier, so he had long since rid himself of the ability to lose his breath, but if he still could, he would’ve choked at the sight of her when he broke past the doors. She was seated so that the eye of anyone who entered the ballroom would be drawn to her first, but he would’ve found her regardless. He had promised. 

Wherever you were, he would always find you. 

It’s difficult to hide, being as tall as he is, but Gojo managed. He didn’t want you to see him coming. Already, he has to bite his lip to fight down his smile as he draws closer and closer. A few more steps, a detour to duck behind some random noble, and he’s in front of you. 

“May I?” You don’t have a chance to speak before he’s already dragging a chair closer. 

The smile on your face doesn’t match the harsh delivery of your words. “The next time you leave me alone with these miserable fools, I’ll order you to fall on your sword.”

Gojo laughs, unfazed. “Good choice. You’re too pretty to get your hands dirty. Although, you are a bit more murderous than expected for a princess.” 

“You try putting up with Naoya’s simpering gibberish for an hour.”

“I don’t have to.” He slips into the chair beside you, avoiding you neatly when you try to trip him. “Watch your feet, my lady. People like me don’t have to put up with Naoya.” 

People like you shouldn’t have to, either. You’re both higher ranking than he is, a princess and a lord each, yet Gojo’s the only one who gets to escape his painful-to-witness affections. 

It’s only natural. A royal dowry comes attached to you. Any eligible man would have to be an idiot not to fight for your hand, but really, they’re vying for a chance at kingship. You can’t go one day without someone reminding you that you’re a physical embodiment of the crown, something to want and own. 

Gojo pours himself water with a heavy hand, bypassing the wine. Watching him sip at it, you realize you’ve actually never seen him drink.

“Come now,” he says, a little softer. “Don’t look so desolate. What will I do if everyone sees you pouting? You’ll ruin my reputation.”  

“You don’t have a reputation to ruin.” 

“Don’t underestimate the things I’d do for the smallest sign of joy from you. Shall I procure one right now to destroy for your amusement?” 

You know he wants you to smile, but you can’t. Even if Gojo can usually pry laughter from you with the ease of a trained jester, this time, your sadness weighs over you like a heavy wool cloak. It’s your birthday, but it’s not a happy occasion. Every passing year tightens the noose around your neck. 

You’re a princess, and that means your life was arranged for you before you breathed your first breath. There’s nothing you can do about it. You’ve never had a choice. 

“Don’t,” he whispers. 

“Don’t what?” 

“Don’t make that face,” he says. “I’d marry you. If it came down to it, I’d take care of you.” 

His words nearly cause you to spill your drink all over your finely embroidered dress. If it set in, it would never come out. He grasps your hand just as the cup begins to tip, saving you. 

“Did you mistake your water for wine?” It’s a genuine question from you. 

He waves his goblet around carelessly. You’re worried he might be actually drunk, but you smell no alcohol on him. He couldn’t get inebriated from just a sip, anyway. Whatever wild whims have overtaken him tonight are entirely of his own design. 

“Better me than Naoya, no? I’d keep you safe.” He cracks a crooked smile in your direction, like you’re sharing a secret. “Admit it. I’d be a good husband. If I were around, you’d be untouchable.” 

He’s telling the truth. If Gojo Satoru was your husband, no one would dare anything with you, but you chase the idea from your mind as quickly as Gojo plants it. You’re your father’s daughter, raised on his practicality. You don’t waste time on pipe dreams. Better the hideous truth than a lie costumed in beauty - the bite of thorns was infinitely preferable to the impermanent fantasy of petals. 

Instead of answering him, you push your plate in his direction. You don’t even have to ask. Gojo dutifully takes your knife and fork in hand to cut up your meat. “Not even going to consider it, princess? I’m hurt. That was a serious offer, you know.” 

“You’re insufferable. Be quiet and eat.” 

Gojo’s mother used to say that the more adamantly someone denied something, the closer to the truth it likely was. You can only hope Gojo doesn’t remember, because she was right. The reason you won’t give him even an inch on the topic of marriage is because a proposal from him is the only thing you want but can’t have. 

Predictably, he ignores you. He’s never known when to quit. With so little that can genuinely stand in his way, Gojo has difficulty understanding the concept of a limitation. You’re both spoiled in that sense, noble children who had never been told no. 

“Think about it,” he says casually. “We’d be invincible. What other house could stand before our union?”

“I said- hello, father.” 

“A little early to be calling- oh, hello, Your Majesty. You look well tonight. Is that a new ring?” 

Your father cuffs Gojo around the ears. “Brat.” 

He’s in a good mood, then. 

“My little girl,” he says to you. “How pretty you look. I’m surprised no one has stolen you away from me yet.” 

You’re not so little anymore, but you forgive him. It’s just the two of you, ever since the queen died. He’s the reason you are what you are, as cultivated as a rose in a greenhouse. The climate that nurtured you is one carefully tailored by his own hand. 

“Not for lack of trying,” Gojo says brightly. 

“Boy,” your father calls him, despite the fact that Gojo isn’t a boy either. A deep sigh escapes his lungs. He looks truly sorrowful for a moment. “You look just like your mother.” 

Gojo’s smile freezes on his face. It’s true, he does. Through him, the king’s former hand lives again, but you know Gojo doesn’t want to be seen as an extension of her, even if he misses her more than anything. 

You’re familiar with the way your father knows exactly what to say to make you feel small again. The king is someone who exudes power. His uncanny ability to pick out what you’re most sensitive to and exploit it makes even the most proud of noblemen revert to children in his presence, as if they’ve been scolded by a nanny for stealing tarts from the kitchen. It’s strange that you feel the need to protect Gojo, the strongest person you know, from that. 

He reaches out and pats Gojo’s cheek now that he’s reduced him to silence. “Enjoy the night, my dear child.” 

When he leaves, Gojo slumps back in his chair with a tick in his jaw. Even if the king is your father, he can’t help himself. “Nasty old man,” he mutters. 

You pinch his thigh beneath the table. “Smile and look pretty.”

“Ugh, who is it now?”

“Lord Zenin and his son haven’t gotten their fill of tormenting me.” 

“Hm,” Gojo says. “I wonder.” 

“If you have a plan to avoid them, hurry. They’re nearly here.” 

“I don’t know,” he teases. “I don’t think you’d like it very much.”

“Yes, well, I don’t like conversation with Sir Zenin very much either.” 

He grabs your hand. “Then you’ll forgive me for anything that happens tonight?” 

“Anything is questionable, but do as you please.” 

He tugs you from your seat, pulling you through the crowd of people. Caught in his wake, you float past faces familiar and unfamiliar until the patriarch of House Zenin and his infernal spawn fade behind you. 

When you turn to face him again, he’s dipped into a bow. His smile is sweet, boyish. It’s as if you’re children again, and he’s stolen you from your lessons to waltz in an empty ballroom, motes of dust that you’ve stirred up floating in the sunbeams. 

He extends his hand, a sapphire burning on one finger. A dragon curls around the silver band of the ring, a nod to his heritage. Though the Gojos are a powerful and ancient house, in this moment, Gojo looks young, foolish, and all the better for it. 

“May I have this dance, my lady?” 

You giggle, wishing you had a fan to pretend to hide behind. You’re playing pretend again, acting as if you’re characters from a storybook.

“I’d be delighted to, my lord.” 

The music swells. Gojo takes your hand and presses a kiss to your bare knuckles. His lips are soft against your skin, temptation incarnate. In his grasp, your fingers tremble slightly, torn between wanting to seize him and wanting to run away. 

You’re terrified by how much you want him. 

If you let him in for one second, you can imagine how easy it would be to never stop. He’s every one of your desires and hopes made manifest, tied up in a single person. Although it’s impossible, you still feel the heat of him. The warmth of his lips linger on you, a stolen moment before he sweeps you up in his arms.

This is how you remember he’s a boy no longer. The breadth of his shoulders is wide. He’s lost the roundness of youth, his face growing angular and cunning. There’s solid muscle underneath your hands as he pulls you with him, his feet beating a steady rhythm that you have to fight to keep up with. 

He’s doing it on purpose, you know, testing how much you still retained all of those years of tutoring. You’re determined to show him they weren’t for naught. 

When you catch your breath and master the music once more, gliding with him rather than being tugged along, he smiles like he always expected you to. He’s been like this since you were young, dangling challenges in front of you that he’s equally as excited to see you pass as fail. 

The music slows. All around you, the frantic steps melt into slow swaying. You’re feeling brave tonight, so you step closer. You allow the arm curled more tightly around your waist, the tender look in his eyes. When you steal a glance around, no one is watching the two of you, but how far can you go before you lose it all? 

“Don’t talk to Naoya again,” he murmurs against your skin. It tickles, and you squirm until he presses so close it petrifies you. “I don’t like the rumors around him.”

“What rumors?”

“Bad ones. He tumbles girls and leaves them with nothing. Hurts them, takes whatever he wants, and ruins their lives. I don’t trust him, and especially not with you.” His hand smoothes over a stray ruffle on your petticoat, the gesture impossibly loving. “Never with you, princess.” 

You shudder at the way he says princess, feeling cut open, exposed. What has gotten into him tonight? You don’t understand. It feels like drowning, your brain always three steps behind, struggling to break the waves of your confusion. 

You know you’re weak. It’s your name that protects you, the threat of your father and the royal house behind you. Alone, you’re a lamb to slaughter. You’ve been spoiled your whole life, leaving you naive and helpless. 

Gojo is someone you trust implicitly. He’s always protected you. You’ve relied on him for as long as you’ve been alive, but perhaps that’s conditioned you to feel comfortable putting your hand into the mouth of the beast. Even at the chance of exposing how poorly you’ve been trained for the court’s schemes, you don’t hold back when you’re with him. He makes you feel at ease to speak freely without fearing how much you’ll reveal of your own vulnerabilities. 

“I can’t,” you tell him honestly. “House Zenin is one of the Three Great Houses. I can’t refuse Naoya without good reason.” 

“Then marry me,” he says softly. “Marry me and be done with all of this. They don’t deserve you, anyway. They won’t treat you like I will.” 

You close your eyes, feeling the telltale hotness of incoming tears burn behind your eyelids. Why did he do this to you? He was so gentle it hurt, even though you knew he was capable of terrible things. Somehow that made it worse, the knowledge that he was choosing to be kind. 

“You should go,” you say instead. 

Marriage between you and Gojo would never happen. Forget your father. An alliance between the strongest house and the royal house? It would be akin to tyranny. There would be blood in the streets before any of the other nobles would allow it. It’s better not to dream about impossible desires. 

Thorns, not petals, you remind yourself. You can suffer the truth. 

“Why?” He says. “I want to stay with you. I want to be good to you.” 

“This isn’t something to joke about, Satoru.” He looks like he’d rather you have slapped him. “Never talk to me about this again. Find someone else to dance with.” 

There. Your brain snags on something to distract you. You’ve been dancing with him for too long. It’ll reflect poorly on your reputation to give an unmarried man so much of your attention. 

“Pick another partner,” you urge him. 

His brow creases. Stubbornly, he holds onto you even tighter. “Don’t want to.” 

“You have to. Everyone will whisper. I’m surprised they aren’t already.”

“Then let them,” he pleads. “It doesn’t mean anything to me.” 

Regretfully, you pull away. Darkness clouds his beautiful face. It’s unnatural. When you remember him, he’s always smiling. The instances when he directs a genuine frown at you are few and far between, but you’ve already made your decision. 

Gojo stalks off in search of a new partner. Somehow, even though you were the one who forced him to leave, your heart stings to watch his back fade into the distance. If you didn’t want him to go, you shouldn’t have said anything. This is what you hoped for. Still, it’s painful. 

You want to find somewhere to rest after your spat, drained from a rare argument with him, but nowhere is secluded enough for you to let your guard down. Suddenly, you feel a wave of hatred for your stupid, glittering palace and the stupid, glittering fools infesting it. You just fought with your best friend and you’re tired, but you still have to keep up appearances. 

Somewhere nearby, Gojo is spinning another girl, her skirts flaring out around them. You wish you could press your palms to your eyes, letting the pressure relieve your headache, but you’ve shown enough weakness tonight. Instead, you tilt your head back and breathe, trying to appear calm and in control. 

It’s a good thing you restrained yourself, because Naoya is the one that finds you. His shoes are the first thing you see, black leather with steel accents. Steel, not silver, because he wants it to hurt when he kicks. 

You know. You’ve heard the stories. 

“Abandoned by Satoru, my lady?” You hate the way it sounds coming out of his mouth. Gojo makes it sound so intimate, like it’s for you and him only. Naoya’s version is a bastardization, much like the man himself. 

You’re too tired to deal with him, and yet, you’ll have to. House Zenin is important to your father and thus, important to you, especially when you inevitably replace him. “What are you insinuating about your princess, Sir Zenin?”

You use the proper address, the way he should’ve spoken about Gojo. They’re not close enough for him to be calling the other man by his first name. 

“Nothing, nothing,” he says. “Don’t get defensive now.”

You want to tell one of the knights stationed around the hall to drag him away. Instead, you smile and let him prattle on. Court politics. If you ever want to prove to your father you deserve everything you’ve been born into, you have to play the game. No matter how terrible some of the players are. 

“Since you graced Satoru with one, I hope you wouldn’t mind another dance.” 

Turning him down isn’t an option, but when you see that everyone’s watching, you realize even more how much it really isn’t an option. He probably arranged it that way too. Demonspawn. You’d curse his house if you could, instead, you offer him your hand, cringing internally when he tries kissing it. 

You can’t help but compare the two. Gojo did it better. 

Like any son of a high born house, Naoya’s a good dancer. It’s the one compliment you’re willing to grace him with, as everything else about him, especially his personality, is hideous. His hand is solid against your upper back, the other leading you as you spin around the room. It makes you want to scrub yourself clean, even under the layers of clothes. 

You’re doing this for your house. Your throne. This is nothing. None of your mantras diminish your desire to shove Naoya’s head in the cake waiting at the banquet table. 

“I’ve been waiting for this for a long time,” he tells you. 

“Forwardness is unbecoming in a man,” you say with a smile, as if he’s telling you the sweetest nothings. “What would my father say?”

“Don’t play coy, princess. We both know how this ends.” 

“Please excuse me,” you say as soon as the song ends. One is enough. “I find myself rather dizzy.” 

Naoya’s lips whiten with anger. He tries to grab your wrist, but someone steps between you. “Watch your hands with Her Royal Highness, Zenin. I won’t tolerate your disrespect.” 

Naoya’s eyes flash, but the interloper is sweeping you away already. His hands hover above your dress, never actually touching, as he guides you in the opposite direction. 

“Sir Getou, what are you doing?” 

Getou looks down on you in amusement once you’re a safe distance away. “Satoru sent me to rescue you, of course. I didn’t think he was serious when he said you would get into trouble without him.”

“Trouble finds me,” you reply archly. 

“Yes, yes,” he placates, sparking annoyance even though he just saved you from Naoya. “Are you tired of dancing yet, or do you have room for one more? I’m hoping to make an impression on potential wives by dancing with the princess.”

You’re smart enough to know that one more is rarely truly one more, but Getou did save you from Naoya. Besides, if you’re busy with him, no one else can ask for your hand. 

“I suppose I can spare you a dance.” 

Like Gojo, Getou is an adept dancer. He is, after all, a trained court noble, and the sons of House Getou are unusually predisposed to the arts in any case. If the Gojos are known for their strength, the Getous are known for their crafts. 

Getou doesn’t flinch from your unwavering gaze. If anything, he seems to find it amusing, although in the way one would find a puppy amusing. Gently, he leads you around the ballroom. 

“Stay alert, my lady. Someone’s watching you,” Getou warns. 

You follow his gaze to Gojo. There’s a beautiful woman in his arms that takes you no time at all to place, so infamous is her notoriety. Yuki of House Tsukumo is second only to Gojo in her blatant disrespect for everything the elders held dear. 

They make a striking couple. Everywhere they go, heads turn to watch them pass. Her gold to his silver, her lion to his dragon - it would be a powerful match. They would be perfect for each other, if only because no one would be able to challenge each other like they could. 

Excellent dancers each, together they become an instrument for the music to shine through. Getou is gentle with you, each movement as delicate as lilies floating across the surface of a pond. In contrast, Gojo and Yuki dance like they’re fighting, each trying to gain an advantage over the other. They’re magnetic, drawing every eye in the room to watch them. 

Everyone else may be entranced by the pair of them, but the pair itself seems disinterested in the crowd around them. Yuki’s eyes are closed but Gojo-

Gojo’s looking at you. Your cheeks heat with his attention. His stare is intense, eyes half-lidded. Every move is prowling, almost predatory. His eyes remain fixated on your face as he and Yuki move in a complicated, sinuous series of circles. There’s something impossibly filthy about his gaze. It borders on indecency, combined with the way he barely seems to be paying attention to dancing, giving you all of his focus instead.

“We can’t let them steal all the attention,” Getou says. He really is Gojo’s brother-in-arms. “Let’s give them a show.” 

You’ve never been trained in statecraft, but you’ve been given the very finest of tutors in the elegant manners of the court. A show, as Getou puts it, is more than within your capabilities. You close your senses to the rest of the world, focusing on the shift of your skirts and Getou’s quiet voice as your steps weave intricate patterns across the floor. 

He’s a naturally friendly man. It’s easy to talk to him, whispering between each peak in the music. Although he’s friends with Gojo, your social circles rarely overlap enough for you to spend much time in Getou’s company. You’re almost surprised by how much you enjoy it. 

“I think it’s time to change partners,” calls a familiar voice.

As Getou takes the hands of Lady Yuki, her eyes still closed as she sways, someone takes his place. Gojo’s hand slides from where Getou’s were placed appropriately on your upper back down to your hip. You drag them back up, ignoring his pout. He’ll be your last dance of the night. 

“Should I be worried about being replaced?” He murmurs. 

“It was only one turn,” you tell him. 

“And I never want to do it again,” he says. “The other girls don’t dance like you do.” 

He’s an unrepentant liar. You might have been tutored by the best dancers your father could find, but at this level, first and second place might as well be interchangeable. He’s only saying it so you know that he wanted to come back to you, despite the fact that you forced him away. 

Gojo’s a contradiction wrapped inside a paradox, at once sadistic and merciful. No one’s capable of making you feel as much as he does. Without the guidance of formal tutors to give you the education of a prince, you have no idea how to navigate the dangerous world of alliances and betrayals, war and peace. Once, you clumsily blundered through diplomacy, watching your father’s disappointment grow by the hour. You’ve since learned that complete silence is preferable to gaucheness. At least that is something your education as a princess has taught you. 

But Gojo knew you before you grew into the woman you are now. He still remembers how to pull smiles and tears from you, how to push you to the brink of exasperation and coax you into brilliant happiness. He has a key to all the gates you’ve erected. No matter what you do, he always slips past your defenses. 

If you keep letting him do as he pleases, you’ll be the only one who loses. Gojo is a man. If he’s rumored to be attached to the princess, it’ll elevate his reputation. He’s already the best swordsman in the entire kingdom. Being thought of as a profligate would only make them worship him more. People love a little hint of degeneracy to their heroes - not too much to make them immoral, but enough to make them attainable. 

A princess is not a hero. You’re not someone to attain, you’re someone to obtain. When people look at you, they only see the crown. If you’re thought of as a ruined woman, it would prevent you from finding a husband. It would destabilize the entire kingdom. 

It hurts to realize that you’re that selfish. Gojo would’ve chosen you over anything, but you’re letting something as empty as reputation displace him. 

Not that it’s exactly a choice. Your life has been forfeit since you were born. You don’t belong to yourself, but to the royal house. As the only child of the king, you can’t allow yourself any mistakes, not when even the barest twitch of your fingers is scrutinized. 

When Gojo offers to escort you back to your chambers at the end of the night, you swallow down the desire to agree. His eyes are hopeful, mirroring your own expression. It could be like back then, when you were children, running through the halls of the grand palace without a care in the world. Except you know you can never return to the halcyon days of your childhood, before your mother died, before his mother disappeared, before everything went wrong. You try not to let the disappointment on his face bother you when you allow the knight your father sent to bring you back to your rooms instead. 

You attribute the strange feeling you get in the morning to the leftover melancholy of last night. Sunlight trickles across your face lazily, not enough to raise you from your bed but just bright enough to remind you that morning was here. 

You’ve never slept long enough for the sun to warm your face while you were still entangled in your sheets before. The window faces your bed at such an awkward angle that the sun has to be high in the sky before it can light across your pillows. 

Usually a maid wakes you by now if you aren’t up already. Where were they? 

A gentle knock at the door only makes you more apprehensive. It can’t be Utahime. You know the sound of her steps. The pacing is stilted, awkward, as if whoever was behind the door was nervous. 

“Hello?”

“Oh, princess!” Definitely nervous. Not a voice you can recognize. A new maid, perhaps? But why would they-

The door bursts open. You scream as a cloaked figure lunges at you. She throws herself on top of you, trying to pin you to the bed so she can run you through with the knife she has raised in her left hand. 

She’s crying. “You weren’t supposed to be awake!”

Crying and angry. Fluffy white down bursts into the air, obscuring your vision as she stabs a pillow so brutally it vomits its contents. She’s not very good, which explains her terror. Unfortunately, you aren’t very good either, and you’re pinned underneath her. Thrashing doesn’t work - at the very least, she’s stronger than you, if badly trained. 

When she finally immobilizes you, she has a growing bruise over her arm from a terrible punch you had thrown, trying to mimic the way Gojo does it. Keeping your thumb outside your fist was all you remembered, and it went wide. You barely managed to hit her, and it came with a cost. She snags your wrist and pins it down. 

The knife plunges towards you. It’s rusty, which terrifies you almost as much as the implement itself. If by some miracle you survived, you’d be at risk of infection. 

Blue eyes flash before you. In this moment, an inch away from death, you wish you had gotten to say goodbye to him. Fear robs you of rationality. You don’t know anything but that you want to see him one more time and feel the warmth of his embrace. 

“Princess, it’s okay. I’m here.” 

You crack an eye open. The girl is no longer visible. The only person leaning over you now has white hair and the characteristic Gojo eyes, impossible to fake. You decide you must’ve died already. This is heaven, where your wishes have been granted. 

Gojo pulls you up. His hands are warm and solid. Vaguely, you realize that you’re trembling with the same nonchalant distance that you would use to catalog the color of the pillows. 

“You’re not dead yet.”

“Did I say that out loud?”

He chuckles. His thumb is rubbing soothing circles into your palm. “No, I could just tell by the look in your eyes.” 

“The girl…”

“Dead.” 

You scramble to the edge of your bed and peek over. Sure enough, she’s lying in a pool of her own blood. Her throat has been cut so surely her head is nearly separated from her body. 

You gag. 

“Wait,” Gojo says. He kneels to tear off her cloak and holds it in front of you. “Here, princess.”

You don’t want to give in to your queasiness, especially not when he himself is so stoic, so you shake your head. More insistently, he pushes it towards you. 

“It’s only natural,” he soothes. “I’m used to this. You’ve never seen a dead body before.”

“Just come here,” you say weakly. “No, actually. I’ll come to you.” 

“Give me a second,” he says, dropping to his knees. Under the bed, he retrieves your silk slippers. He slips them onto your feet gently, standing when he’s finished with his task. 

Obligingly, he waits as you gingerly step over the girl. When your slipper threatens to dip into the red stain spreading across your floor, he simply grabs you underneath the armpits and lifts you over it. 

Even though it’s a horrific scene, you can’t look away. Her face is frozen in a still mask. Bile fills your stomach. Gojo gently turns your head in another direction with two fingers, the touch delicate. “Don’t look.” 

“I think I’m going to be sick.” 

“I told you not to restrain yourself,” he says disapprovingly.

“You’re not- you’re-“ You can’t figure out the right way to finish your sentence. “Does it really get that easy?” 

His laugh is short and brutal. “Easy? I didn’t even think about it. All I know how to do is kill. I don’t mind it, for you.” 

You shake your head. There’s nothing to say, with a body between you and blood pooling around both your shoes, but still, your heart aches. You had known him when he was a boy. It would always be hard to see him with calluses where once his hands had been chubby and soft. 

He chucks you under the chin, the gesture fleetingly affectionate. “Don’t be so despondent, princess. I’m glad to do it. That’s what knights are for.” 

Knights and maids, all meant to lay down their life or other lives for you at your convenience. Utahime was too loyal to have let an assassin into your chambers by choice. Your breath catches. It concerns him that you’re teetering into upset again, just when he’s calmed you down. 

“Satoru, is Iori-“ The thought is too horrible. You can’t finish it. 

“She’s not dead,” he says. 

Noticeably, he doesn’t say that she’s alright. 

Utahime will be scarred forever. They found her slumped at the bottom of the stairs, her body dumped unceremoniously after they stole her from outside your bedroom. A massive gash opened her right cheek up, crossing just slightly over her nose bridge. 

You almost can’t bear to look at her. Not because her scar makes her hideous - far from it. Utahime will always be beautiful to you. The scar is only a reminder of how you’ve failed her. 

You’re a princess without any power.  All you can do is fuss over her after the fact, unable to change the past. 

“Princess,” she hisses, jerking away from you for the third time in as many minutes. “You must stop! I’m your lady-in-waiting, not the other way around.” 

“You got hurt for me,” you say, hands balled helplessly at your side. You refuse to touch her more aggressively, for fear of aggravating her wound. The bandages wrapped around her cheek are an ever present reminder of how much she’s sacrificed for you. So are the whispers. The looks. She holds her head high, acting as if it doesn’t bother her. 

“I was glad to do it. I didn’t want to be shipped off to some far away baron anyway. Be grateful,” she cracks a smile you don’t feel. “I certainly am. At least I could still join the church, if anything.” 

Why do the people around you insist on destroying themselves for your benefit? 

“You don’t need a baron.” Loyally, you vow, “I’ll take care of you for the rest of your life.”

“Be careful, my lady. Some would take that as a marriage proposal, and then I’d have twice as many death threats.”

“I’d protect you.”

“You, princess? I doubt that,” Gojo calls. 

You’ve been watching the knights move in and out of the arena from your vantage point on the royal balcony, but very few of them have dared to address you, much less speak to you so casually. They’re all too focused on the tourney you’re set to watch this afternoon. Only he would be so familiar with you and so unconcerned about the sparring, knowing his chances. 

Utahime lets out an aggressive sigh with no regard as to whether or not Gojo could hear her. In fact, she’d probably prefer it if he had overheard. Gojo, for his part, ignores the chance to antagonize her for once in his life in order to focus on you.  

“You know, my lady, I’ve heard an interesting rumor going around.” 

You walk to the edge of the balcony and peer over the railing. Utahime gasps in fear and grabs onto your petticoats, afraid that you’ll tip over the fencing. “Go on, Sir Gojo,” you say. 

“If a fair damsel grants a knight her favor, he’ll fight ten times as well. Twenty, even. And all the more so if it’s the princess, who everyone knows is the fairest in the land.”

Unwillingly, a smile twitches to life upon your lips. “Is that so?”

“Won’t you grant your most loyal knight a token of your affection?”

“Don’t,” Utahime gripes. “What has he done to deserve it?”

A scrap of pale blue fabric flutters in the light breeze, reminiscent of doves. Gojo catches the ribbon you’ve loosed from your hair, his fist enclosed in armor. He brings it to his lips for a chaste kiss he can’t place upon you. The entire time, his eyes are on yours, searching. 

“I’ll win this whole thing,” he says. “I’ll defeat every knight here for you.” 

The trumpets blow, calling the contestants. He’ll be wanted. Utahime shakes you lightly as he leaves your sight. “Get yourself together,” she says sternly. 

“But mama, I love him!” You joke. 

Her frown can’t last in the face of your teasing smile. She fixes the lace on your sleeve and collar, though they’re hardly ruffled. She can’t help herself. It’s her second nature to dote on you. 

“Ah, my princess,” she sighs. “You worry me.” 

You poke her uninjured cheek, trying to get her to smile. “It’s not me. You worry too much.”

Another voice cuts in. “I feel the same way sometimes, my dear Lady Utahime, but I trust no one more than you. Her mother left her to your capable hands, after all.” 

Your father has arrived. Utahime smiles as the king kisses her cheek, but you can’t. You know he means it lightheartedly, but it galls you all the more that he says it so blithely. When your mother fell ill, Utahime had been the one who took charge of looking after you. 

Not your father. 

Not your only living parent, the man who was supposed to feel all the closer to you for your loss. Instead, he pushed you away. 

You knew you weren’t being fair. 

The king had been wracked with grief over the passing of his beloved wife. Along with his other royal duties, he couldn’t possibly have been expected to watch over an infant as well. You know better than anyone the toll the crown takes on a man. Stewardship of this land asks a heavy price. It’s not an easy role. 

No, you can’t blame your father for choosing the country. It’s his duty, as it is yours.

You only wish it hadn’t been Utahime’s burden to carry instead. She was just a few years older, a child still when she had raised another child. In many ways, she had been a mother to you. Only now that you’ve grown older than she had been back then do you understand how much responsibility she had accepted at such a young age. 

Your father turns to you. “Are you enjoying the tournament?”

“It’s barely started. Only the squires have been jousting. We haven’t seen any of the real knights yet.” 

“Those squires will become knights themselves one day. Watch carefully, and you may discover a treasure worth keeping.”

As he speaks, you finally find someone worth watching, as if your father only had to say it to cause it to happen. A boy with rosy hair lunges towards his opponent. He disarms him and forces him to the ground - only to offer him his hand in exchange.  

The other squire hesitates. Doubt crosses his face. Finally, he accepts the proffered hand like someone expecting an attack at any minute, but all the other boy does is pull him to his feet and dust him off. He’s more honorable than most of the knights of the realm you know, too focused on humiliating their opponents to flaunt their own glory. 

Your father doesn’t notice your distraction. He’s still speaking. You bring yourself back to the conversation just in time to hear him say, “Sukuna, the King of the Curses.”

“Sorry?” You laugh. 

“It’s no laughing matter, I’m afraid,” your father says gravely. “He’s the ruler of the Western Kingdom, the land where the sun never sets. Perhaps he’s grown tired of his arid land and seeks gentler climes, for his invasions have earned him the title ‘King of Curses’.” 

Utahime’s lip curls in disgust. “King of Cruelty is more like it. I’ve heard of what he’s done to his prisoners. That man has no honor.”

“None,” your father agrees, “and yet it is necessary not to antagonize him. We are small if prosperous. We can’t afford it.”

Utahime looks as if she wants to speak, but she holds her tongue. She’s always been good at navigating the court. Trained under her, you wait as well. Taking your cues from her is something you’ve done since you were a child.

“Yes,” your father says, his eyes distant. He’s ruminating over something he won’t share. “He can’t be provoked. The representative he sent us for this tourney must be carefully attended to.” 

That representative, Uraume, doesn’t fight like any knight you know. Their sword is wider than most of those found in your country, and half as tall as a man. Precision is lost in favor of brutality. They wreak havoc with the brutality of a butcher, tearing through the ranks of your best and strongest. Of course, he’s not the only strong fighter. There are other knights to watch as well. 

“That Lady Tsukumo is doing quite well for a woman,” your father notes in surprise. “What prodigious talent. I don’t think her house has produced a fighter like that in years.”

“She’s better than half your knights,” you remind him. “Lady Tsukumo already defeated most of her bracket.” 

“Yes, yes,” your father laughs. “You know I don’t mean it like that. I’m simply admiring her.” 

As the day progresses, clear victors emerge in each division of the tournament. Uraume is one of them. Gojo is another. 

They placed him against Getou for his penultimate match, knowing the crowd would go wild for a contest between not only two of the best knights of the realm, but sworn brothers. Although Getou is better than most, Gojo is more of a natural disaster than a real, human adversary. At the end of their round, Getou smiles even as Gojo brings him to his knees. 

The next round is even more hotly anticipated than Getou and Gojo’s. 

Gojo strides into the center of the arena with the classic arrogance he’s known for. He delights in riling the crowd up. They cheer louder and louder on each circuit he laps around the arena on his silver stallion, pale as moonlight. By the last, they’re nearly delirious with passion for him. 

Uraume has no such pretenses. They’re a cold creature, as frigid as they come. 

It matters not. Gojo beats them so easily that it can only be described as disrespectful. He rides past Uraume and thrusts the hilt of his sword into their stomach with such force they fall off their horse. Gojo dismounts casually. He hadn’t even used his blade. He flips Uraume onto their back with a boot and steps onto their breastplate, pinning them in place. His sword hovers underneath their chin, a whisper away from death. “Yield,” he says pleasantly. 

You, remembering your fathers speech about Sukuna’s chosen representative from that morning, glance to the side. He’s smiling as gently as ever. Underneath his cloak, where only you and Utahime can see, his hands clenched so tightly his knuckles have turned white. 

After the match, you recognize one of the men rushing Uraume off to be one of your father’s most trusted advisors. He must be doing damage control, but then again, when is he not when Gojo’s around? 

Your father stands, as composed as if he had never been upset in the first place. You envy that self-control. You’ve always aspired to your father. In your eyes, he was the perfect ruler - perhaps because he was the one who taught you what a ruler should be. 

Gojo waits in the center of the arena. He’s beautiful as always, as fierce as an avenging angel. There’s a fine sweat beading at his temples in a way that makes you want to wipe it off with your handkerchief, but you abstain, knowing thousands are watching. 

Gojo has no such scruples. 

When it’s time for him to be awarded his laurel crown, he kneels - not to your father, but to you. A gasp rises from the crowd. You stifle your own shock. Here, where every sign of weakness is clearly visible and easily taken advantage of, you can’t reveal that this wasn’t planned. The royal family’s control over its retainers must appear immaculate - even if Gojo had always been uncontrollable. 

Wordlessly, your father passes you the laurel. You know something is brewing. He can only tolerate Gojo’s outlandish behavior so many times. But this isn’t the place to worry about your father’s incumbent wrath, so you take over the duties of honoring the victor. It’s easy. You’ve seen your father do it enough times to be able to replicate it in your sleep. 

Gojo rises from his knees, a hungry smile on his face. “I told you I’d win.” 

“That you did,” you reply noncommittally, trying to figure out how you’re going to discreetly get him out of the arena without your father attempting to try him for treason. 

He frowns. Knowing him and the type of maneuvers he’s likely to pull, you put a respectable amount of distance between the two of you as you mark his brow in gold paint. 

When you grasp his hand to lift his arm into the air, he presses something into your palm. Years of sharing secrets and playing pretend at espionage have trained you not to flinch. When you lower your enjoined hands, you slip the shred of paper he’s passed you into your pocket. 

People are cheering. You notice with warmth that he looks heroic, like he’s stepped right out of an old legend. Your father doesn’t seem to agree. 

Arguments between the two of you used to be few and far between, but lately it seems like you can’t do anything right. You’d forgotten what it was like to retreat to your parents’ bedroom for a scolding. It hadn’t happened since you were a child, yet here you were again, studying the fabric of the draperies to avoid eye contact with your father, just like you had when you were younger. 

“He wasn’t trying to be disrespectful,” you start. But that’s not true, and you know it. So you try again. “He wasn’t trying to cause problems. He cares about the kingdom, father. He was just trying to show off his - our - strength.” 

“Gojo is a liability.” How easily your father casts him off, marks him as defective. He’s always been like that - clinical in his appraisal. You lacked that precise, indifferent ruthlessness. You’ve tried. 

“He’s a good man, a good knight. House Gojo has always been loyal to us, father. Remember his mother? Remember Sorashi? She wouldn’t want you to treat her son like this.”

Your father flinches. First comes sorrow, then, anger. “Don’t speak to me about Sorashi.”

“You can’t just pretend like they never existed! Sorashi, my mother-“

“Child, you are testing my patience dangerously.” 

You fall silent, hating yourself for it. Always a child. Never someone worth listening to. 

“You don’t understand anything,” he says more gently. 

“I don’t understand anything because you won’t tell me anything!” 

“You’re a princess,” he snarls. “You’re not supposed to know anything!”

You reel back, stunned. You had always been afraid that this was how your father truly felt. 

“You have no sons, so it’s me or no one else.” Disgust fills you at the fear in your own voice. Weak. Pathetic. After all these years, the lessons your father gave you still haven’t sunk in. Perhaps he’s right, and you’re not fit for the throne after all. You’re still begging for what you want instead of demanding it like it’s what you deserve. A prince wouldn’t act like this, but you’re not a prince - only a girl who was never taught how to rule. 

He throws up his hands in exasperation. “I didn’t say anything about sons. See, you’re too young and inexperienced. This is why I won’t let you in yet. You’re not ready to rule.”

“But I will?”

He gives you a wan smile. He’s tired. Guilt seeps through you. These days, all you do is fight. You miss the times when it felt like you had worked together. At the end of all of it, you love your father. You hate that it’s been like this. 

“All in time, my child. I love you, I really do. But you’re not ready.” 

Mutiny curls under your tongue. You’re not ready because he waited too long, hoping for a male heir until your mother died. By then, it was too late for you to catch up on years of lessons you should’ve had. Regardless of what he says, you know how he feels. You were never the one he wanted but-

He’s still your father. When he reaches out to stroke your cheek, a peace offering, you close your eyes against his hand and don’t give voice to your treasonous thoughts. It’s nothing to suffer the humiliation of your status for a while longer. You have all the time in the world to earn your place. 

Your father is right, in the end. You can be patient. 

Back in the privacy of your room, you unfurl Gojo’s note. Gojo’s mother had him trained in elegant cursive that he uses for formal documents and letters. In his messages to you, it degenerates into chicken scratch. It’s a lucky coincidence that it’s all but unreadable to anyone else, making it a code only you can decipher. 

The gardens at midnight. - S. 

Only a place and a time. Is he trying to tempt fate? 

You indulge in the idea of not going, especially since things are already tense with your father. All the way up until the hour you need to leave, you let yourself believe it’s not happening. It’s too risky. People are already suspicious of you as it is. The minute passes, and if you go now, you’ll be late, so you won’t. 

You grab your shawl with a huff of annoyance. You’re going. You were always going to go, from the very moment you got the note. 

You aren’t used to sneaking through hallways you usually glide through. There are several close calls as you make your way closer and closer to the gardens. Multiple times, you’re forced to make a run for the nearest door or drape to hide behind. 

You’re barely two feet away when you’re finally caught. A hand slaps over your mouth before you can scream as someone tugs you into a dark corridor. You kick and lash out, forgetting everything Gojo has taught you in favor of blind violence. 

“Shh,” comes a voice in your ear. “It’s just me.” 

You bite him. 

He hisses and pulls back, shaking out his hand. “What’s wrong with you?” 

“Why would you do that? You scared me!” 

“You’re not careful enough, princess. Did you even notice the maid coming up the left hallway?”

Admittedly, you hadn’t. It’s lucky that he was there to save you. 

Gojo has always been there to protect you. The tension bleeds from your body. You sigh and lean into him. You can’t help it. 

He laughs. “Are you that happy to see me?” 

“If you don’t be quiet, I’ll show you exactly how happy I am.” 

“Come on,” he tugs you out towards the gardens. It’s dangerous, but you follow him anyway. Being with Gojo is so threatening not despite his strength, but because of it. You rely on him too easily, trusting him to see you safely through any peril. His very presence is the promise of security. It makes it too easy to relax when he’s with you. 

You expect him to tell you why he called you here, but he remains silent when he tugs you down on the bench next to him. “Satoru?” 

“Here,” he says, opening his hands. A single crushed violet sits on his palm. You raise it to your eye. It’s all the more fragrant because it has been mangled, the delicate petals bruised to release the scent into the air. 

Gojo’s mouth lifts in a smile. “Sorry,” he says. “I didn’t realize.” 

“You really know how to win a girl’s heart,” you tease. 

“Hopefully I know how to win over her father’s too.”

You freeze. 

“If not marriage, then knighthood. Let me be yours, in whatever way I can have you.” 

“You have me,” you tell him. “You always have.”

You don’t know how to answer such devotion. Besides the obvious political ramifications of being wedded to Gojo when your marriage is meant to be a bargaining chip used for the sake of your kingdom, you don’t want it. Not like this. 

Gojo has been your dedicated shield for so long, the two of you have forgotten a life where he wouldn’t give up everything to protect you. He’d do anything for you - even that which he should hold sacred for himself. His very body is littered with scars that he’s received on your behalf. How much more can you take from him? 

Does Gojo really want to marry you or does he want to protect you? Will he play the part of the devoted servant for the rest of his life? 

“You don’t have to…” You realize you don’t know how to say it. Or that you don’t want to. Selfishly, a part of you can’t bear to release him from the oath he gave you when you were children, though he couldn’t have known. Neither of you could have understood what it meant for him to kneel at your feet and swear his life to you. It had all been in good fun, the way children understand things. “I don’t want you to- Oh, Satoru. You don’t owe me anything. You’ve done enough for me.” 

For a second, your imagination plays tricks on you. The cobalt of his eyes kindles into a terrifying flame, like the lightning in the town he hails from. It’s as if the draconic blood his ancestors claimed still lives within him. 

He continues as if he hadn’t heard you. “I’m going to ask your father tomorrow. I want to be your dedicated knight; I won’t wait any longer. I’ve waited enough.” 

His pushiness feeds your annoyance. You cling to it, preferring it to the dreadful hopelessness inside of you. The right thing is not always the easy thing. Gojo deserves his freedom after wasting his youth on keeping you safe, yet letting him go feels as difficult as willingly driving a nail through your hand. You want to cling to him forever, reassured by his strength. 

“Don’t,” you say, trying to sound firm. 

“At the ceremony,” he says determinedly. “When he gives me captainship in the army. He’ll have to say yes if I ask him then.” 

“Satoru, please-” Your voice wobbles embarrassingly, and you have to pause. Silently, you beg your tears not to fall. The way he disarms you is humiliating. You turn away, but Gojo understands. Years of watching after you has taught him a lot. He bandaged the scrapes that you refused to cry over and avenged your honor after you pretended your pride hadn't been hurt. He can see right through you. “Please don’t.” 

You see the frustration on his face. He’s not a man used to holding himself back, and yet he does. 

“It’s alright,” he says. “We can wait.” 

It’s just another number to add to the tally of favors you owe him. “It’s not that I don’t want you to be my guard,” you say in a small voice. “I just-” 

“I know. Though I do think the king will ask me anyway, so this is all pointless.” He looks away. “I just wanted you to- Nevermind.” 

“Really?” Doubt colors your voice. 

“I’m the strongest. Who else would your father ask to protect you but me?” 

“He doesn’t like you,” you point out. “No, he does, but it’s a very begrudging like. I don’t get it.” 

It makes you smile, thinking about the way your father can’t stand Gojo but won’t allow anyone else to speak poorly of him. He’s still a Gojo after all, no matter how much trouble he causes your father, and your father loves Gojos. The royal house has always held their house dear. They had been close for decades. Always, they were something to the other, no matter what form that something took. 

“There you are,” Gojo murmurs. His fingers trace the arc of your mouth. “So pretty.” 

You glare at him through tears. “And whose fault is it that I cried?” 

“Your father’s?” 

You scoff. “You see? This is why he doesn’t like you.” 

Gojo looks at you seriously. “I’ll get down on both knees and beg him for it if I have to.” 

“Don’t do that,” you gasp. 

“I don’t care,” he says. “You’re what’s most important to me. More than pride, more than honor.” 

You look at the crushed violet in your hand. 

Who else but Gojo? 

He breaks you down so easily. You press the flower back into his palm. “I know you’ll do what’s right.” 

His eyes soften. He leans closer. 

“Gojo,” comes a voice. “What are you doing in the gardens this late at night?” 

You stiffen. The owner of the voice is drawing closer. 

“Do you trust me?” Gojo asks, as cool and collected as ever. 

You nod, fearing your voice will give you away. He cups your face in his hands and ever so delicately presses a light kiss to your cheek, tilting his head towards you. Does it look like a real kiss from afar? Did he mean it to? 

“Stop,” he tells the man behind you. “Don’t come any closer. You’ll scare her.” 

“A new plaything?” Asks Yaga. “I’m not so scary, am I?” 

Gojo notices you tremble harder as the voice registers. Lord Commander Yaga is close to the King. As the captain of the kingsguard, he could ruin everything.

Gojo lifts a hand to the back of your head and presses it gently towards his shoulder, obscuring your face. He pulls you towards him, arranging your legs around his waist. A soothing hand traces a warm path up and down your back. It calms you as much as it shames you. You’ve never been this close to any man, not even him, and now you’re cuddling only for the sake of protecting your secrets. 

“The Lord Commander of the Kingsguard is a terrifying man, or so I’ve heard,” he says casually, as if the two of you aren’t trapped in an extremely compromising position. As if your father wouldn’t demand his head on a pike if Yaga realized who it was. 

“Just escort her to her room when you’re done,” Yaga says gruffly. “I don’t need to tell you to be a gentleman, do I?” 

“No, sir,” Gojo says cheerfully. 

That night, you breathe a sigh of relief. Yaga gave no sign he recognized you. He acted as if he normally would upon encountering any soldier of his on a late night escapade, profoundly disinterested and deeply desirous to get away. Only in the morning do you begin to doubt your deception. 

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐀𝐁𝐎'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡

one piece social media + dating feat: sabo

》 asl brothers completed

♡ liked by lalalakoala, nicorobin and 5.3k others

_ynln: ur gf or ramen, pick one

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: the answer is obvious

↳ saaaa_bo: ramen 🙏

↳ ace: wrong.

↳ ace: the correct answer is me 🤩🤩

↳ marco_o: said absolutely no one

↳ _ynln: @saaaa_bo surely this is grounds for a break up 🫤

lalalakoala: okay we get it, you have a boyfriend

p1rateking_luffy: YOU GUYS GOT RAMEN WITHOUT ME?????!!!!??! ☹️☹️

↳ _ynln: sorry luf, i'll bring you next time!

↳ saaaa_bo: no wtf we are not bringing luffy, i'm gonna go broke and he's gonna eat our share

↳ ace: im gonna have to agree with sabo

↳ p1rateking_luffy: 🙁

↳ lovenami: nah sabo you're so real for that (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: @ace you are literally the LAST person who can say that

♡ liked by blackleg.sanji, nefertari_vivi and 6.9k others

_ynln: applications for a new bf linked in my bio.

[music: traitor - Olivia Rodrigo ♫]

tagged: saaaa_bo

blackleg.sanji: I APPLIED ‼️‼️‼️

blackleg.sanji: HOW MANY CAN I SEND IN?!

blackleg.sanji: WILL I BE NOTIFIED IF I MAKE IT IN THE WAITLIST?

↳ theroronoa.zoro: the only notification you're gonna get is one from the police

saaaa_bo: WOWW JUST CAUSE I CHOSE RAMEN OVER YOU 🤨🤨

↳ _ynln: girls gotta do what she's gotta do

↳ _ynln: OMG SABO YOU APPLIED? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH OMG STOP 💗💗

↳ saaaa_bo: wtv loser.

lovenami: omg you should've made them transfer you five dollars to apply

↳ _ynln: nami ur trying to pimp me out huh 😭🫵

lovenami: you're so gorg yn. (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ _ynln: i miss u sm namiiii 💕

nefertari_vivi: OMG STOP UR SO PRETTY I LOVE UUU

↳ _ynln: 😭💕

ace: why is everyone happy EXCEPT ME (liked by saaaa_bo)

↳ marco_o: give me five minutes and i'll dm u a list of reasons (liked by _ynln, saaa_bo, p1rateking_luffy)

♡ liked by ace, lalalakoala and 11 others

priv.ynn: blocking him on this acc so he doesn't see this but omg this is so cute, koala caught him trying to buy gifts for me <333

ace: yo wtf why isn't he getting me prada 🤨

ace: ALSO WHAT DID HE BUY DAMN THAT BAG IS HUGE

↳ priv.ynn: IDK I RLLY WANT TO KNOW

lalalakoala: you guys are so cute together it makes me want to die 🥱

lovenami: DAMNN GIRLY UR SO LUCKY (liked by priv.ynn)

♡ liked by p1rateking_luffy, _ynln and 8.2k others

saaa_bo: public service announcement: my gf is the best. i love her sm. she is so beautiful, i am so lucky to be hers <3

tagged: _ynln

p1rateking_luffy: HEHE my future sister in law is so pretty (liked by ace, p1rateking_luffy)

↳ _ynln: AWWW LUFFY YOU'RE SO SWEET LOVE U 💕💕

_ynln: SABO STOP

_ynln: YOURE MAKING ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ALL OVER AGAIN YOU IDIOT 🤓💖

↳ saaaa_bo: does this mean i won the boyfriend application?

↳ _ynln: there was no competition 💪

nicorobin: pretty girl

↳ saaaa_bo: i agree ☝️

↳ _ynln: YOU GUYS STOP IT IUBWVCEI

lalalakoala: think u feel lonely? spend the night third wheeling these guys and see how u feel then 💀💀

↳ _ynln: KOALA WE TRIED SETTING YOU UP W SO MANY PEOPLE YOU'RE JUST PICKY

↳ lalalakoala: 🥱🥱

♡ liked by saaaa_bo, ace and 8.5k others

_ynln: top scoring appplicant 1️⃣

tagged: saaaa_bo

saaaa_bo: pretty woman

saaaa_bo: hell yeah 💪🔥🔥

ace: yn check ur dms i sent u uggo photos of sabo as a kid

↳ _ynln: LMFAOOO???

↳ saaaa_bo: ACE YOU'RE LITERALLY PRAYING ON MY DOWNFALL

↳ saaaa_bo: ALSO I WAS NEVER AN UGLY KID

↳ ace: sorry couldn't hear that over that tooth gap of urs 🥱

↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO FUNNY ACE

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐

↳ _ynln: HAHAHA NOOOO SABO WAS SO CUTE ‼️

↳ ace: everyone she's being held at gunpoint (liked by _ynln)

↳ saaaa_bo: 😐😐

blackleg.sanji: NOOOOOO

blackleg.sanji: gotta respect sabo for treating you well gorgeous queen (liked by saaaa_bo)

lalalakoala: omg im literally gonna have to block u

[insxghtt]

reschedule — bella ramsey x reader

All you wanted was to go back in time.

warnings: hurt/comfort. i used they/them pronouns for bella (bc i see that it's what pedro uses) and it was kind of difficult bc english is not my first language so if i got anything wrong i apologize. also bella said that they don't rlly care abt pronouns so i guess if i use she/her or he/him is ok right? idk let me know in the comments.

this was based on two requests: "hi babe can you write bella ramsey x reader where reader and bella are in a relationship but reader believes bella will leave them and bella reassures reader that they love them sm" / "bella and reader have a massive fight and reader thinks it’s a breakup but then bella comes and they makeup?"

You and Bella had been together for three years and not even once you doubted that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with them. Bella was everything you’ve ever wanted. They were kind, funny, beautiful, and most importantly, they always made sure to make you feel loved. 

You knew how important their career was to them and you respected that. The Last of Us was a huge success and Bella was out a lot, doing interviews and even getting new jobs. You were so proud of them and just seeing that sparkle in their eyes was enough to make you forget any problem you had going on. 

Well, you had a few problems going on. You just released your second book and the book launch was awesome, except for a little detail. Bella wasn’t there. 

It’s okay, you thought. They were busy with work. It happens. But just because it happens doesn’t mean that it didn’t hurt a bit. Especially when you found out that they didn’t show up because of an interview. Interviews can be rescheduled. Especially when it was someone like Bella. Pedro rescheduled an interview two times a while ago just because his sister needed some help with the children. He said that family always comes first. 

It was your second book. You had been writing it for two years, working every single detail of it. It was a big deal. Maybe she didn’t see you as family, you thought. That was when all the problems became to appear. All your insecurities, all your internal conflicts. You spent the whole book launch overthinking every part of your relationship. 

When you got home, you knew Bella would be there. They had your key and asked if they could go to your place after the interview. You said yes, of course. Didn’t matter if you were slightly hurt, you just wanted to be with them. 

“Hey! How was it?”, Bella smiled when they saw you walk inside the apartment. 

“It was good”, you smiled back and gave them a big hug. “I missed you so much.” 

Bella laughed at how muffled your voice was because of the way your face was hidden on the curve of their neck. “I missed you too, darling.” 

You let them go and they gave you a quick kiss. “I’m hungry. And really, really, tired.” 

“I know. It’s why I ordered some pizza”, they pointed to the box on the center table in front of the couch. 

“Oh, you’re the best!”, you throwed your body on the comfortable couch and sighed. “Is it pepperoni?” 

“Yes...”, they sat next to you and grabbed one piece, giving it to you. 

“Thank God... I mean, I know you’re like, a hater of meat eaters, but...” 

“I’m not a hater!” 

“You are kind of a hater. It’s why I appreciate this”, you grabbed the slice of pizza. 

Bella grabbed one slice of the other pizza, the one without meat, and looked at you. You two smiled at each other and toasted the slices before eating it. 

The time went by and considering how hungry the two of you were, it didn’t take long for the pizza to disappear. Between one bite and another, you told Bella about the event. You told everything, like you wanted them to see it. You really wanted them to see it. And when Bella realized it, they felt terrible for not being there. 

“I’m so sorry I wasn’t there.” 

“You already said that”, you laughed and held their hand. 

You were with your head laid on their shoulder and you felt them kissing your hair. 

“No, I mean it.” 

You raised your head to look at Bella. “It’s fine, you were working.” 

“You’re not mad at me?” 

“No!”. 

You were a little mad, but it would pass. There was no reason to ruin that moment with a stupid argument. They were sorry, that’s all that mattered to you. 

“At least you read my book, it’s more than what my own mother did, so...”, you joked. 

But Bella didn’t laugh. In fact, they gulped. 

“You read it, right?” 

The response was the silence. All the walls you used to hide how disappointed you were collapsed right there. 

“You didn’t even read my book?”, you dropped their hand. 

“I was going to...” 

“I gave it to you, like, a month ago.” 

“I was going to read it, I swear! It’s just that there were so many things going on that I...” 

“Oh my God”, you stood up from the couch. “You really don’t care, do you?” 

“What?”, they stood up as well. “Of course I do!” 

“Yes, of course you do, but never as much as you care about your own work!” 

Both of you were angry now. Bella was feeling offended. It wasn’t like they were terrible all the time, Bella was always doing the best to make you happy. 

“Are you kidding me?” 

“No, Bella, it’s just the truth.” 

“Imagine if I told you that every time you say no when I invite you to an event, how would you feel?” 

“It’s different, Bella. You’re great at what you do.” 

“And so are you!” 

“It’s not the same thing!”, you yelled. “People love you. You’re successful.” 

“So what? You want me to not be good at my job?” 

“No, damnit! What I'm trying to tell you is that we’re different. You’re on, like, a thousand tv shows”, you pointed at her and then at yourself. “My biggest achievement was a book written three years ago and after that, all I do is sit and watch while the world around me continues to move.” 

Bella stood silent, waiting for you to finish with tears in their eyes. 

“The one thing that kept me going was this stupid plot I had in my mind during a shower, a stupid plot that I worked so fucking hard for two years. You were there, you saw it! I fucking cried myself to sleep wondering if I would ever do anything good again”, you dried your tears with the sleeve of your sweater. “And I finally did it! I did it, and it’s so good, and I wanted you to be there so you could see how good I am. I wanted to give you a reason to be proud of me!” 

When you were done talking, Bella didn’t say anything. They didn’t even look at you. 

“I think I should go”, they said. 

“You’re going to leave? Really?” 

“I just...”, they sighed. “I need to be alone now.” 

Bella gave you no time to say anything. They grabbed their bag that was on the corner table next to the door and left. 

“Yeah, that is really fucking mature, Bella!”, you yelled before the door was closed and they were gone. 

The morning after that night was awful. You and Bella never had a fight like that. You tried to call them 2 times since you woke up, but it was useless. At first, you thought they were asleep, that’s why they haven’t answer. But the day went by, the night came again, and they still gave you no answer. Talking to their mom, you found out where Bella was. 

“Locked in their room”, she said through the phone. 

“Okay, can I talk to them?”, you asked nervously. 

“Did you guys have a fight?” 

“Ah...”, you were not sure you wanted to talk about this. 

“Alright, you don’t have to tell me”, she calmed you down. “Bella asked me to say that they’re busy, if anyone called.” 

Shit, they were going to break up with you. 

“I though Pedro and Bella were supposed to be on a tv show today.” 

“Bella rescheduled.” 

Okay, so whatever Bella was doing, it was more important than you, apparently. 

“Oh...” 

Bella’s mom sighed. She knew the two of you enough to tell that something was off. 

“Honey don’t worry”, she said. “I’m sure you guys will figure this out.” 

It didn’t feel like it. 

“Okay”, you agreed. “Thank you, I'll try to call them again later.” 

“Bella loves you very much, you’ll be fine.” 

You thanked her again before hanging up. Not a second after that, you got a message from Pedro, answering one of your texts asking about Bella. 

“They didn’t say anything to me. Just that something came up and that it was urgent, so we had to reschedule the interview.” 

You couldn’t stop a tear from rolling down your cheek as you typed. 

“I think they’re gonna break up with me” 

Pedro was fast to answer that one. 

“Bella is crazy for you. Shut up.” 

You let out a sad laugh. Pedro was so sure of it that you were a bit jealous of that confidence. Bella never did that before. Honestly, it felt like it was already done. You could imagine them coming to your apartment to pick up their stuff and you could see yourself begging for them to stay. Were you being dramatic? Maybe, but it felt real. 

You laid on your couch, curled up in a ball of blankets that smelled like Bella. It was funny how much you missed them, considering that you saw each other last night. But this was different, this time they didn’t say the ‘I love you’ that they always said before leaving. No, they said ‘I need to be alone’. 

That was it? Three years of relationship thrown away because of a book. 

The sound of the doorbell brough you back to earth in a flinch. You stood from the couch and stared at the door. What if it was them? You didn’t want to hear it right now. You couldn’t handle it. Not now. 

“I know you’re in there, the lights are on.” 

Shit. It was Bella. Trying to be silent, you reached for the light switch and turned it off. 

“Did you just turn the lights off?” 

“No...”, you answered, soon closing your eyes and hating yourself for being so fucking stupid. 

With no other options, you walked to the door and opened it. 

“Why did you kill him?”, Bella asked. 

They had dark circles around their eyes and on their hands, was the book you gave them. Your book. 

“What?”, you were still trying to process it. 

Bella entered the apartment without even asking. “Why did you kill him? Do you know how sick and twisted this is?!” 

“What are you talking about?” 

“Your book!”, they pointed at it. 

You closed the door and continued to stare at them without having any idea of what was going on. “You read it?” 

“I read the first two pages last night and just couldn’t stop”, they said, gesticulating every word in excitement. “Why did you kill him? Do you know how much I cried?” 

And then you realized. She was talking about the main character on your book. 

“Well, I...” 

“I mean, do you have a problem with happy endings? This is the best book I've ever read, and you had to kill my favorite character?” 

You didn’t know what to say. “How did you finish it so fast?” 

“I was up all night.” 

Oh, so that’s why... 

“And you didn’t even think of, I don’t know, check your fucking phone?”, you yelled. “I thought you were going to break up with me!” 

Bella finally stopped talking and looked at you with confusion in their eyes. 

“Why would I break up with you? I love you.” 

You breathed in relief and closed your eyes. “You dumbass”, you whispered before wrapping your arms around their waist on a tight hug. 

Bella was still confused, but they hugged you back and ran their fingers through your hair. “I’m so sorry I made you think that.” 

You raised your head to look at them. With all the tenderness in the world, Bella touched your cheeks and kissed you on the lips. All the worries, all the sadness, it was all gone. When they pulled away, their arms were still around your neck and your faces were still close. 

“So that's what you were doing?”, you asked with the smile on your lips that Bella loved so much. They nodded. “And you cried?”, Bella nodded again. “Good.” 

Bella laughed and gave you another kiss. “I should’ve been there. And I should’ve read it the same day you gave it to me...” 

“It’s fine.” 

“Shut up, let me finish”, they interrupted, and you let out a laugh. “I am so proud of you. You’re so good at everything you do and this book...”, Bella sighed. “This book is just heartbreaking, perfect, sad, beautiful, thrilling...” 

“Yes, I got it”, you giggled, already blushing from so many compliments. 

“Exciting, original, sensational, fantastic...” 

“Okay!”, you covered their mouth with your hand. “You loved it, I get it.” 

Bella tried to say something, so you removed your hand. 

“Are we good?”, they asked. 

You answered it with another kiss. 

“Okay, I think we’re good”, Bella smiled. 

“Yes. Yes, we are.” 

[eggyboyoart]

I was gonna post a vid on tiktok bc I have more followers there but i'll post it here because-

When I die, I wanna be reincarnated into Redacted Tumblr as a beautiful Lasko/Gavin spicy fic-

Anyway, I drew the D.A.M.N. boys + Imperium AU :D Please look at them, its late and I'm tired.

I also have a speedpaint of them on my yt (eggyboyoart) so if you wanted to look at that as well, I would be rlly happy :))

(TW: Spoilers for Imperium AU)

I wanted Lasko to look super light and soft and cloud-like while also being kind of elegant?? He looks so poofy :D

I hc that he takes rlly RLLY great care of his hair, like- mans has a 23 step routine to keep it untangled and soft :))

The hair routine also helps him relax and de-stress after a long day

I also headcanon that he wears a lot of light, soft sweaters with a button up underneath for that academic soft boy look

In the Imperium AU, he got the scar across his eye from a wayward daemon who tried to attack him in the D.A.M.N. daemon haven.

He wears his hair tied back into a low pony tail to seem more 'professional', bc my mans is the ACADEMY PRESIDENT :D

Imp! Lasko wears a black suit with a white button up and either a red or light blue tie (gotta keep it professional when you're tormenting daemons and chasing after uninterested freelancers :|)

IDK why but whenever I imagine Damien (original timeline), its always with rlly short hair

idk I feel like if he had long hair, it would make him too warm around his neck and that'd make him uncomfortable and grumpy (well, more grumpy than he usually is anyway)

gotta keep the neck open for air flow (and easy access-)

I think he wears a lot of sleeveless clothes (tank tops, sleeveless hoodies, etc and shorts bc of the heat

Damien is a chronic khaki shorts wearer, I'M SORRY-

Imp! Damien is royalty so obvs gotta keep it professional

I feel like he would have other priorities than cutting his hair so it mostly just gets slicked back out of his face

The scar on his neck is from a failed assassination attempt (our boy damien stays livin', unlike Angel-)

I feel like he still wears sleeveless shirts but also wears a fur cape (like, one of those white ones with the black spots with the red velvet) which seems counter intuitive.

I am relieved to say that Imp! Damien doesn't wear khaki shorts :D silver linings, guys-

I wanna start this off my saying, Imp! Huxley might be one of my favourite characters

Hes just, such a piece of shit and I don't want to change him, I want him to stay exactly how he is, thats the POINT-

Freelancer bought him neon jewellery for his lip piercings and he screamed when he got them

also a sweater wearer like lasko but he likes his sweaters to be oversized, but because hes just big, his sweaters are like blankets for regular sized ppl

he has his hair kinda long-ish bc freelancer enjoys playing with it and he likes making his friends happy so he keeps it kinda long just for them-

Imp! Huxley is a piece of shit and we love him for that

He doesn't have friends so his hair is shorter

He probably wears tactical gear/uniform bc he is an enforcer, but its all like a dark green which looks rlly good on him

no neon piercings for Imp! Hux as much as I hate to say it

GAVIN OUR FASHION ICON-

He knows clothes like he knows freelancer's body- IN AND OUT. Hes got that shit LOCKED DOWN

Freelancer gave him the heart glasses as a gift

Gavin never saw the appeal of piercings until freelancer said they would look hot on him, REALLY enjoys all the different types of jewellery

Probably wears patterned button up shirts (with as many buttons undone as possible) with skin tight jean/leather pants

Imp! Gavin dresses like hes homeless, theres no time for fashion when you're trying to survive in an dystopian magic world where everyone hates you :P

I hc that when a Daemon gets low in energy/emotions, they can't keep their 'glamour/human form' up so they forcibly have to take on their more daemonic traits (horns, coloured eyes, markings, tails, claws, etc)

and bc of the shit hole that the Imperium AU world is... :|

I also hc that only sex and sadism daemons have coloured sclera

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 165 spoilers and thoughts below the cut that im not terribly late on this time yippee!

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.

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what if i went up to you and stared at you like this

HAHAHAHAHAAA I LOVE THIS PANEL SO SO MUCH

ive been sending this on like all my socmeds and to all my mutuals/irls. im tormenting them with it it's just so fucking cute and silly . puppy dog eyes javier. pleading emoji. he's just so fucking silly ALKJDFLSDKF HELL I MADE IT MY DISCORD PFP ITS SO GOOFY I LOVE IT SM HAHAHA CUTE CUTE CUTE

HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA

silly panels aside back to the top!

lloyd. stop hurting me oh god he looks so tired and gaunt and,,, lifeless. it HURTS seeing him like this, the life he once had just,,, stripped from him.

LIKE I WANTED TO SEE HIM WITH HIS HAIR DOWN AND MESSY BUT NOT LIKE THIS BRUH WHAT THE HELL SOB SOB SOB

the invitation oh my god. its so silly goofy but also so so personal its cute as hell its stupid looking but in the most affectionate way possible. the people of the estate really REALLY care about him and god idek if lloyd realizes that bc literally just after this, he apologizes to everyone for not being able to things for them anymore

not even able to get back up to get back to the bed GOD I FEEL SICK

but it doesnt matter anymore whether or not lloyd can still protect them, the estate has come to care for him so much , its not his protection they want they just fucking love him and he doesnt realize that i feel so fucking ill. lloyd i need you to open your eyes and look at this beautiful land, this beautiful home you've built with your own two hands. ITS NOT OVER YET PLEASE GOD ITS NOT OVER

and then lloyd without second thought chooses javier to live. because he really thinks hes just an extra getting in the way, a burden, a bug that shouldnt be there. so he thinks its fine if he, as a side character, is the one that dies SOMEONE PUNCH ME.

he looks so fucking SMALL. alone and in the dark IM GONNA EXPLODE INTO TEN BILLION PIECES. who wrote this fuckass program. SWEAR TO GOD IM COMIN DOWN TO FIX IT MYSELF GOD DAMMIT

AND THEN THE SYSTEM TEXTBOX COMING IN IM SO GRATEFUL PLEASE HELP HIM SOB SOB SOB

im super duper heartwarmed to see that whoever is running the blue textbox is on suho's side. it has never been impartial, huh,,, it just wants to see his wish come true. ooogh my heart.

lloyd looks,,, strangely peaceful here. is he like, paused rn? im not really sure what the system box is up to, but hopefully thisll delay anything from happening while javier is concocting his plan,,,

speaking of!

FATE KICKING IN LIKE TEN TIMES WORSE IS SO DAMN SCARY. THE MULTIPLE GIGATITANS OH GODDD im so fucking terrified. javier please hurry!!! he looks rlly cool on draggy here hehe

I THINK JAVIER AND ALICIAS EXCHANGE TOO IS SO FUCKING HILARIOUS. alicia, upon only seeing javier, immediately is suspicious of lloyd scheming something. she thinks the two of them are plotting again, hence the "what are you up to".

the problem is that it's just javier on this plan. there is no lloyd directing him, so javiers reaction is SO silly fun bc i. dont think he thinks of himself as being. scheming?? bc he seems SO confused at alicia's skepticism here HADLFKJSDLFKJ ITS SO FUNNY

I REALLY THINK JAVIER WAS GENUINELY A LITTLE CONFUSED AS TO WHY ALICIA WAS QUESTIONING HIM PLEAAASEEE

i think javier believes he's just going about business as usual. doing what he can to protect his lord, as he does, all the time, the usual. sure that involves getting an angel to ask the queen for the eye of summer, but that's certainly not plotting on the same scale that lloyd does. javier isnt a schemer. he just does whats necessary to protect the one he cares about the most. hence his goofy innocent puppy eyes, because its not like hes "up" to anything. idk how accurate this assessment is, so pls correct me if im wrong, but I LOVE IT A LOT HES JUST SO FUCKING DEDICATED I LOVE U JAVIER MVP!!!!!

and then raphie shows up yay!! EXCEPT HELP WHY DID HE GET SUCKED BACK IMMEDIATELY WHAT THE HELL he was so underprepared. poor guy. getting thrown around like this sob sob

ALICIA ASKING IF THIS IS SMTH JAVIER KNEW ABT OR IF THEY WERE PLANNING SOMETHING AND THEN JAVIER BEING GENUINELY FUCKING SHOCKED HELP MEEEE "maybe its not a prank...?" LMFAOOOOO

i mentioned this in the last ep post but like. again javier wears his heart on his sleeve he's so fucking protagonist its unreal. hell, not even on his sleeve, he has his heart out on his damn palm sob sob

i think he's shocked here bc he didnt expect raphaels call to play out like that, he prolly thought theyd issue it more seriously. the issue with this being so half-hearted is now alicia isnt absolutely certain that this is the will of the heavens, so she's less inclined to follow along. it doesnt help that her board of nobles (seriously why does she keep these bozos around they just keep yapping) are arguing back and forth abt whether or not to listen. this is kind of a little wrench in the smoothness of the plan... everything now hinges on alicia's whim now.

anyway two more panels javier being menacing/blunt as hell and alicia thinking on her throne,,, god they are so fucking. awesome i love them so much

anyway that is ALL! for this week! the episode felt a little bit slow to be honest, but i think that's because the events of this ep are little things that build up to whats next, so i dont mind it at all (especially since the last couple of eps have been super fast lately)! i really really enjoy this buildup and im super excited to see what happens next,,,

see yall next week! lloyd please be okay! or ill cry! like for real!

[yoursweetinoccentdreams]

That Pretty Red Dress.

Pairings: toji! x fem reader.

Warnings: too lazy to put this reader is like 25 and toji is like 27-28 OK OK and also MERRY FUCKIN CHRISTMAS (SORRY IM RLLLLLYY LATE I STARTED THIS AROUND XMAS SOO TECHINCALLLLYYY ITS STILL XMAS TIME OK ;-; SORRYYY)

Colors: Red and green regular text, Blue Is Toji and Pink is reader and white is megumi. (it rlly depends on what tumblr app color u have but the light default color is Megumi u got it)

There you were, under the Christmas tree decorating it with ornaments that were made out of blood red plastic, holding little Megumi in your arms while you each pick up the little decorations piece by piece .. in your pretty little red dress, that brought out your curves and big supple breasts that weren't yet filled with milk.

Toji falls in and out of his slumber as he hears little giggles and chuckles, he sighs getting out of bed putting boxers on and heading downstairs. You can hear Toji's HUGE feet plowing down the stairs as he makes his way over to you and Megumi, he kisses Megumi on his temple & then coming up behind you grabbing your waist pulling you in, & giving 2 kisses to your neck.

"G'mornin, you two are up early" "Toji... its 2:30 in the afternoon...." You chuckle sweetly as Megumi nods off to sleep in your arms. "Mama... i sweepy..." Here.. ill take him to sle- Toji offers, No.. babe i got it i have to uhhh... practice.... you say under your breath. You can feel Toji's stupid smirk as you turn your head from him it now settling in your head that you fucked up. "ill be right back let me put him to sleep." You run upstairs while humming a tune to Megumi, setting him down gently in his toddler bed. You dim the lights as you shut the door hearing those gentle little snores you have always loved so much.

You meet Toji downstairs as you walk up to him giving him a gentle kiss before he says, "...what did you mean by practice?... do you mean what I think you meant?? or were you just messin' around." His dark blue eyes linger upon yours as he doesn't take them off you. "oh.. um.. I meant it.." "So you really want kids?" You hesitate to reply to the question, "I mean.. yes but i don't think I'm really fit to be a mom I-" "Bullshit." Toji interrupts "Yer perfect, everything about you, yer already such a good mom to Megumi, i don't want to pressure you but I'm ready when you are.."

You swallow thickly always wanting a child but never thinking you were good enough to handle such a responsibility. "I'm 25 toji.. don't you think I'm too old?.. your ex wife was 20 when she had Meg..." "She doesn't matter to me anymore okay?... your fuckin beautiful.. how many times do I have to get that thru your thick fuckin skull?" Toji sighs, "Do I have to show you how beautiful you are?" Toji being toji he already knew the answer.

He kissed you deeply and- "Strip." he stated blankly, you could almost laugh in his face for being so stoic. You start taking your Dress off knowing to not to give him any backtalk. As your fully unclothed in front of him he grabs your waist and pulls you in for a kiss. "beautiful".. He whispers. He slaps your ass leaving little red marks on your soft supple skin. "beautiful" he has you straddling him as he picked you up and tossed you on the couch.

He takes his boxers off and slides them down to his ankles, as he cant help but admire you're glistening folds right before him. He kisses your lips before he lowers his head down to suck on your clit. "O-oh fuck Toji..." you moan out in pleasure as he licks and prods his tongue like a prancing reindeer. "Yeah? does that feel good princess? this pussy's all wet and sensitive fr'me... Perfect just how I like it."

You moan at his words like a pornstar "H-hah!.. D-Don't talk like that T-toji..." you plead. "What?.. is it too.. embarrassing?" He coo's, before you can say another word he stuffs you almost full with 2 fingers you wince at the burning sensation, "Shhhh" he silent's your moans with a kiss "Wouldn't want to wake Megumi... Now would we?" You shake your head " N-no..." You blush.

He fingers you with complete strokes, you cover your mouth with both hands. You look up at him with tears in your eyes as you are about to become overstimulated, "You're being such a good girl for me baby, cum for me" He grabs your breasts with the other hand and starts moving them around roughly. "fuck yeah... Gonna get you pregnant nd have these beautiful tits swollen with milk Yeah?, that's what Me and Megumi want... if yer ready wanna give it to us mama?" You could almost imagine having another child with the love of your life, considering Megumi mentioned wanting to have a sibling & you were ovulating so the timing was perfect.

"M-imma cum Toji.." You look down seeing a ring of cum around his fingers, you close your eyes shut thinking about how hes trying to overstimulate you on purpose as if you could feel him smirking at you. As your so close to your high, he fingers you faster, "I'm Cumming!" you're eyes roll back into your head as you try to hold on to something, Not being successful you end up trying to grab the couch, not noticing you're squirting all over Toji's hand. "Fuckkkk ma... that's it.. let go just like that.." "ohh my god.." you say trying to catch your breath. "Alright princess.. Yer.. okay right? " he blushes slightly turning his head acting like he's distracted (AWEE I LOVE SOFT TOJI) "Mhm...." You nod quickly.

Suddenly he gets up stretching his arms and waist, "Are you ready for me princess?" He asks in question,His cock growing painfully hard as he strokes himself aligning his cock with your slit. He looks deep into your eyes and thrusts in gently, waiting until he bottoms out inside of you to get you adjusted. "S-So full..." You whined squeezing ur eyes shut trying to adjust to the pain. "Good girl... takin me so well, fuck mama.."

He praises you as he thrusts into you willingly creating the perfect rhythm and going at the perfect pace. "A-hmmn, Toji! yes! fuckmefuckmefuckme!" You moan with a stream of curses flowing out of your mouth completely forgetting about the toddler upstairs sleeping soundly. Toji puts his hand around you're mouth as you can only be heard by muffled screaming and the sound of Toji's balls hitting your clit repeatedly. "You want me to get you pregnant yeah?, I love you so *thrust* fucking *thrust* much" *thrust*. You can feel yourself coming to your climax as you look down and alas, there's another white ring of cum forming at the base of his cock. "Toji!.. I'm gonna C-cum.. I cant!-" "NO you can.. cmon take it for me, baby.." He pounds you harder, lowering down on top of you as you wrap your legs around his waist trying to desperately hold on. He fucks into you ruthlessly as you nip at his neck and scratch at his back. "fuck... yer so fucking T-tight.."

"mmmm!" you moan to yourself by squeezing your lips together trying to not wake Megumi up. "Im cumming Toji!" You squealed as you could sense a familiar feeling of a knot being tied building up in your core, you gave Toji one more moan as you rolled your eyes to the back of your head squeezing around his waist and hugging him tightly as you reached your climax.

"Thatsss it....." He hisses kissing your neck, " you did so good for me *groan* Princess" He praises you as long ropes of cum spurt inside of you and he goes limp being perfectly satisfied. "M.. Sorry about your back Toji" You apologize willingly as Toji grabs a towel from a freshly washed and dried pile of laundry to cover you up.

"Baby, I'm a sorcerer killer what makes you think I can't handle a couple of scratches?" You giggle at his remark as you try to stand to go check on Megumi but you fail, stumbling to the ground like a baby giraffe taking its first steps but lucky for you toji was there to soften the landing. Toji sighs in relief "Woah.. okay let me carry you what were you trying to do?" The only thing you can think about right now is the 2 most important people who mean the world to you, "I want to take a bath and check up on Meg." Toji clears his throat picking you up bridal style. "Alright..." Toji carries you upstairs to the master bathroom and sets you on the counter as he runs you a nice hot bath putting bath salts, bubbles, and a bath bomb, formed in the shape of the sun that smelled like warm vanilla sugar. Toji helps you inside the bath while he's goes to check up on Megumi who has changed positions but is still sleeping soundly, Toji notices the time and realises an hour and thirty minutes have gone by.

Toji meets you back in the bathroom as his deep voice says " Megs is still sleepin' he's gonna be hungry in a little while.. but for now enjoy your bath. Your heart flutters as the thought of you're Son and your husband checking up on each other every minute of the day. "Toji can you get in with me?" You ask him with pleading eyes. "No.. i just took a bath earlier." He grumbles. You go quiet for a minute or two you were about to clear the silence and speak up when he cuts you off and says "Tch.. Fine." He takes his boxers back off and he sits in the tub behind you cradling you and your stomach. "So... any names?" Toji asks, You smile as you rest your head on his chest and the two of you start coming up with that also means the word

Blessing

the end.

Quick A/N!: I KNOW THIS WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DONE SO LONG AGO BUT I HAVENT HAD ANY MOTIVATION TO POST IVE BEEN FOCUSING WITH WORK ETC BUT IM BACK (I think) SO I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS ONE BUT ITS PROB GONNA FLOP

[yeehawpim]

HI UM i really admire you and your art and i was wondering --

so i really love the way you format your comics, its really straight-forward and lets the reader process every word with ease (which i think adds to the impact of the writing), and that one rue comic with the split colors for the parentheses... how do you do it without making it look so messy?? to bring up another example, the hide-and-seek comic- i love how subtle and genius the call back to hiding behind the door was, it blew my mind... i take a lot of inspiration from the way you format and lay out your comics but for some reason i cant wrap my head around how you do so much with so little (in reality this might just be the result of me wanting to add so many little details for others to find , while being conflicted on keeping it simple, and,,, AGH...) for context : im trying to make a comic about isolation, but i keep filling up the page because i want to add things - when really i know i should be keeping it simple... but other than removing unnecessary details, i want to know what else you do to make your comics so clean and simple yet it rips out the emotions from your heart and has you stare at it as it beats. like... i want that type of impact!! i want to affect others on such an intense level!! i want to induce emotions!!! but how?

(sorry this was long, HAHAHA i just want to drive my point home- again with the 'wanting to add a lot of stuff to prove a point' thing but i digress)

ok first of all that is a huge compliment and it means v much to me, thank you 😭🙏❤️❤️

tbh for me the answer of keeping things uncluttered is paying attention to spacing and eye direction. Spacing depends on timing, if you want an action to happen slowly for instance you can make the space between panels longer, or take more panels for someone to complete an action. There's tricks for directing your eye, if you ever read anyth about focal points (eg biggest contrast, triangular shapes pointing towards what's important), but really with comics I keep in mind you're reading left to right and top to bottom.

The ruehob comic is actually simpler than you think 😅 I already knew which text had to be on the left and right with august's text post. And after that the "lanes" were so narrow there weren't a lot of complicated things I could do, just make sure you still read left to right and saunter vaguely downwards.

when you talk about putting little details, that doesn't necessarily have to distract people. Like I honestly applaud you having the drive to do detailing. You just have to make sure your compositions allow for it. Like if you think about ghibli backgrounds, they're elaborate and beautiful af.

For smth about isolation, my first thought was that you can draw a person in a setting alone among a bunch of objects, for instance. If you keep the person small but surround them with a bunch of detailed objects, it could feel very lonely. Just make sure the person still stands out b/c they're what's important, so for example the background stuff is a less saturated colour, or the person is the least detailed thing on the page. I think that's the main thing, you just have to make sure the things important to what you're saying stand out. Clarity is rlly half the battle when I'm laying things out haha

In school our teacher called this "killing your babies" because it sucks when you work hard on a cool drawing and it just doesn't work out😂This also still happens to me, it's actually partly why I keep things simple so I can work fast and throw out less

Here is a timestamp from supereyepatchwolf's video about Chainsaw Man, which has some of the coolest fuckin layouts

He's got other stuff that talks about manga and how eye direction can work and what cool stuff has been done. Off the top of my head his vid about one piece and his vid about gantz have helped me understand how to cause Emotions. Also I think he has one about Junji Ito that specifically talks about how details can make you scared, if you're into that 😂

hope this helps!

[dekarios]

tagged by @arisatominakos to do this lil poll...!!

pick your favourite ship featuring at least one oc of mine :3 i am literally only including my two primary afhiri ships because i think this is a fucking war because i have friends who rlly don't like one and adore the other and theres some clear bias shit going on so I WILL MAKE THEM FIGHT. under the read more is some info about both ships and the characters :) candor is ofc another oc of mine and gale is. mr dekarios

i will not be tagging anyone because this kind of embarrasses me.... LDKSJFSDF wait i lie i tag @aeducanthaig @roseeway i know who null will vote for actually... IF YOU WANNA DO THIS CONSIDER URSELF TAGGED PLEASE!!!!! this is such a good idea i'm just a twit

afhiri is my sweet lil bardic clown tiefling that i feel like everyone who follows me knows intimately by now SL;DFKSDF ... if you don't know much about afhiri.... afhiri is very silly and very sweet, uneducated and purposefully pretends to be much more immature and childish than they actually are because they are quite literally trying to relive their childhood that was stolen from them! they don't like responsibility or emotional conflict! they do like to sing and dance and have fun :3

candor is a solar angel who acts as a steward and avatar for lathander and is very calm and collected .. stern, sotic, quite dry and humourless.... is undergoing a self imposed exile because it feels like it failed lathander (it literally didnt). believes wholly in honour and duty and justice, is absolutely full to the brime with affection and love and shows it wholly through loyal devotion and service .

candor finds afhiri during the exile and decides to protect her from herself (and her wild magic) . candor fully believes they are soulmates and when candor was created at the beginning of the universe it was created with a missing piece, and that afhiri is that piece ..... also candor is 10ft tall and afhiri is 5ft tall so like. :) they are extremely gentle and sweet together. afhiri is not a calm person at all and is quite against anything that tries to get her to be srs at any amounts cuz it frightens them. but candor is different. candor threatens everything afhiri is trying to build (running away from themselves and what they were forced to become for their family) but afhiri doesn't run from candor.... it is security, it is safety. it is ok to be their entire self around candor. candor leaves at the end of the game feeling worthy of returning to lathanders side, and promises afhiri that when she dies, it will guide her through the upper planes and they will spend eternity together

afhiri x gale is super funny to me i rewrote canon a bit with it so picture this . wyll and karlach are partners in my canon, and afhiri is acting as a sort of replacement for karlach in intimacy between the couple . gale sees this as afhiri being a third partner in the relationship and grows jealous because he likes afhiri and believes he could be better for her so the act 2 scene is him confessing his feelings and asking for her to give him a chance because he knows they'll create beautiful magic together.. and afhiri laughs in his face cuz she's just fwb with them man. god gale ur so silly. i like silly. mwah mwah anyway that's how that relationship starts. i like afhiri x gale because to me its about keeping gale young... she is fun and full of energy and life and gale has kept himself locked away for a year to wither and wilt and afhiri is a burning sun who makes him feel alive ... this relationship ends up quite toxic however, a certain event happens that causes gale to kill afhiri (and candor gets involved its a whole drama) and gale feels so much guilt and fear at the realisation of death separating them that they have limited time hes back on his god bullshit ^_^ though it's not all bad. in my canon afhiri and gale ascend together and candor and afhiri are reunited in the upper planes but its a bit different :) (candor isnt happy, but devoted itself to afhiri instead of lathander all the same) .

as u can see afhiri x candor and afhiri x gale has quite a lot of overlapping and theres some poly stuff going on here i could talk about it forever.....

[captain-mj]

hey idk if I missed what it stands for somewhere or smth but. rlly curious what ESU stands for in the GhostSoap Handler fic.

also,, 100000/10 fuckign,,, LOVING that fic so MUCH I am bouncing off the walls like the roommate's crackhead cat at 2am that keeps one from getting decent sleep

So this is the last chapter! ESU stands for Experimental Soldiers Unit (not the most creative but are most military names?)

Previous Parts

Soap gently helped Ghost into his tac vest while Ghost checked Soap’s gun. He went over every inch, making sure it was working perfectly.

Ghost felt a kiss be placed to the base of his wings.

There was a funny sense of finality that Ghost knew everyone around him must feel. Surely they had to.

Yet no one acted any differently.

It was a simple milk run. The only difference was Valeria was the target. It was fine. Normal.

Fucking… normal.

Ghost felt like he was on a tightrope. Soap was perfect. Soap was always perfect. But Jesus Christ he was tired. It ached. This longing to curl back up in his chair in Glasgow.

Graves’s words were going to him. But now, so were Alex’s.

“Simon, do you ever wish you could retire?”

“No.”

“I do. I think of one day never shifting back. Putting the wings away. Maybe just cutting them off so i can never be asked again.” Alex had seemed far away. Something had changed with him recently. Or maybe it was Ghost seeing it for the first time. “Can’t do it yet. Not while they’re still things to do. People to protect.”

Ghost hadn’t responded.

Alejandro seemed happy. Graves seemed happy. Was it something they were doing? Some secret?

Alejandro and Rodolfo got married. He saw the way they looked at each other. It was the way he looked at Soap when he caught himself in mirrors.

Why was that not enough? Why was loving Soap not enough to fix it? Fix him? Make him less tired?

But he did his job just like always. He sat quietly in his seat on the truck, listening to a Gaz and Price and Soap. They were talking about the mission, planning.

Ghost would go in alone and they’d ambush her. She knew they were coming so they expected a lot of fighting. It’s why it was important they stay and watch his back.

His nails dug into his skin. They were concerned about him. Price asked if he could handle it alone.

“Yes, sir. I can.”

Ghost went into the building, taking special care to be silent. Everyone else could get the enemies' attention. He just needed to find Valeria.

And he did. He found her with a hurt monster. A Damaged thing.

Nunez's wings were beautiful, but he had the same staining on his skin that Ghost did. Same curse.

Valeria looked at him.

He understood.

"I watched the military destroy Alejandro. Take men and return pieces of them. I just... couldn't let that happen to him. I stopped it in Los Almas when no one else did!" Valeria hissed at him, standing in front of Nunez. "It was selfish and horrible what they did. You defend them you..." She stared, slowly relaxing. "You..."

Ghost stared. He swallowed thickly.

"No, you get it."

Ghost hated her.

"If we're found, they'll take him away from me. They'll start experimenting on him again. Can you live with that?"

Ghost thought of an airplane.

"Go." He rasps. "Just go."

Valeria smiled and Nunez dragged her away, going faster than anyone Ghost had ever seen. And Ghost went out a different door.

He heard them realize Valeria was going South and Ghost started going North.

Simon knew he had to go home.

Hopefully Soap wouldn't be so mad at him.

His radio went off. "Simon. Simon, how copy."

Ghost took his radio off and dropped it on the ground.

"Simon. How copy."

Ghost listened to them try to call him back. He took off his vest and left it on the ground. His dog tags were left a few feet away from them.

He hoped Alex would leave soon. He deserved it. Gaz deserved it. To know his sweetheart would be coming home.

Ghost remembered his journey to Texas after Mexico. It felt similar. His feet bled. His chest convulsed. The little thing called his heart beating and fluttering randomly. It begged him to go back or lay down and die.

What are you without the military?

Don't know. I'll figure it out.

What are you without Soap there to hold your hand?

If I never let go of his hand, I'll never have to know.

Ghost found himself crawling into Soap's bed in Glasgow. He showered first, not wanting to dirty his sheets. Soap had been there recently it seemed but left again. His body sank into the pillows. Too large and bulky but it cradled him gently.

When he got up, he ate. He showered again. He stared at the walls before using Soap's computer.

First thing he did was snoop through emails to look at reports. They were about him. All about him. Where was he? Why was his gear left? Is he okay?

In one of Price's reports, there was a message at the bottom.

"I hope it goes well."

It was an odd phrasing. Just odd enough for Ghost to know it was on purpose.

Of course Price would know.

After a week of searching, life returned to normal. For them. Ghost was still in Soap's home. And after a lot of rest, he started to do stuff again. He started to look through more reports, but nothing was that fun. Then, he started to search the internet.

Ghost found his brother's old music. Silly teenage band music. He liked hearing his brother's drumming. The person singing didn't really matter. Just Tommy's drumming.

It led Simon down a rabbit hole. About his murder apparently.

There were videos upon videos about his family.

He watched every single one.

True crime videos. Women doing makeup and men making jokes.

it was nice, seeing his family together again sans his father.

Then, someone showed a picture of him in a bar, clearly drunk and hunched over. His body was already changed but the baggy hoodie kept it semi hidden.

"It's time stamped for 9:17."

"Time of Death was put at 9:19."

"How did he travel all the way home and tear them to shreds in two minutes?"

Ghost didn't do it. That night wasn't his fault.

The realization had him clawing at his skin and wailing until he worried the neighbors may call the cops. His head throbbed and his throat ached.

The black on his skin spread. It burned and ached and for once, Ghost decided it wouldn't be so bad to be half mad and feral. His brain hurt. There was so much heat on his body. Intense and furious.

A fever over took him. It felt almost silly. Like his emotions had gotten so harsh and bad that it gave him a physical reaction.

His body had an intense ache over it and it felt like the light blistered against his skin. Everything was hazy and out of focus, unable to focus on anything.

So Simon showered in the dark and he ignored that his skin felt so uncomfortable and that his feathers had started to fall out.

And then one day, he woke up, body incredibly sore from his fever but no more hysteria or fever. He ran his hands over his face, pausing.

His hands. They looked.

Normal.

No claws.

Just pink flesh.

There was a sound and he perked up. It didn't ring in his ears or go on for ages.

There was a click of a door and Simon went downstairs. His clothes hung off of him, no longer tight.

Soap.

Soap put his keys into the bowl. He looked exhausted. Red rings around his eyes.

Simon was stupid.

"Missed me?"

Johnny went for his gun before freezing. He just kept staring.

"Ghost?"

Simon stretched, for the first time in years not feeling the weight of wings and guilt on his shoulders.

"Just Simon."

"Simon."

"How about I make you a cup of coffee? Or food? I'm sure you're starving." Simon wanted to feel useful suddenly. It was an intense need to help that was interrupted by Soap kissing him hard. Simon only flinched back, worried his fangs would cut his lips. But there were no fangs. Just lips.

Simon yanked him closer and kissed him deeply, pulling him in closer.

Johnny pulled away and shook him. "You fucking disappeared. You fucking... You..." He kissed him again.

"I'm sorry. I waited here for you. I'm never going to let go of your hand."

"Huh?"

"Don't worry about it."

[lussiane333]

I saw the name VINCENT SINCLAIR IN THE LIST OF WHO U WRITE FOR?? Omg u got my favorite slasher, now I HAVE to share my ideas w u

ok ok, so let’s say his s/o is an artist too, right? I feel like they would model for each other. Like, we all know how there are head canons of Vincent and his s/o going on cute dates like sitting under the shade of a tree and having a picnic with various fruits and stuff, yk, the romantic shit, but I imagine them sitting only a foot away from each other both with their noses in sketchbooks as they glance back and forth from the paper to the other and each time they make eye contact they just blush n get shy or something cute like that-

or like, if his s/o has long hair, they just do each other’s hair to relax after long days of murdering and waxing n stuff. But I also imagine Vincent having a really southern accent when he whispers. Bc, well, we know he can breathe, so wether he can speak or not doesn’t rlly matter since he can just kinda whisper without a voice lol. But both of his brothers have THICC southern accents, and in EVERY SINGLE FANFIC where Vincent speaks, (which I don’t agree with but I’m not here to shame bc that’s not cool) he never has an accent :(

u don’t have to even respond to this lol I know I’m not that imaginative, but I hope that I gave u some ideas or inspiration!

-btw u look great today ;)

Hello there! I'm glad you decided to share your ideas and thoughts with me 🖤

If you are also into art, he would want to make and create stuff with you together! (Vincent would like to hear your every idea how to make his "living figurines" even more interesting looking)

If you brought up the idea of drawing and sketching each other, he would clean around his space and try to make it the most comfortable for both of you!

He would get everything, your every little detail. For him, drawing and painting is the other way to admire and cherish beauty.

Vincent would definitely stop drawing unintentionally and look at you, you'd notice him, give him that beautiful smile he loves, and if he's without mask you would notice his mouth corners slowly rising up, never taking his eyes off you. I also imagine tired Vincent and you in bed, massaging his palms, helping him to relax and he's just like in heaven.

He asks you to pose for him very often. He has this little sketchbook that is full of drawings that are forming into the final piece of you.

The hair stuff? Yes. Brushing through his long hair while being pressed against him, he just melts.

Imagine he is working on his next thing, or cleaning his knives, or medical supplies he has, he's deeply focused and of course his hair is getting in the way. He doesn't pay it no mind, he's used to it and it somehow comforts him even. But getting the stuff out of his hair is not so comforting.. So you walk over to him, and put his hair up with a tie and kiss his cheek, he really does appreciate it.

After a long tiring day Vincent loves when he can just lay on top of you and bury his face into the crook of your neck, feel you, and smell your hair and scent.

His absolutely favorite thing is when you tangle your hands into his hair and go through it with your fingers. Best way for him to fall asleep. Now if you have long hair, expect Vincent want to braid and brush it every chance he gets. He likes how your hair looks and loves the way it smells! If you're using some oils, he's doing it for you now. If you have short hair he still wants to brush it, stroke it, and help you wash it in the shower.

The accent.. Again, Vincent snuggled up with you, arms around you and listening to you talk about things, and maybe you even asked him something he doesn't really know, he just looks at you and is like:

"I love ya.. so much" and holds you even tighter to him.

[asexualzoro]

it's december 9th, meaning today is my 23rd birthday (which is my favorite number!), which means it's time for...

Lew Writes Wrapped 2023!!!

im including anything that happened after my last bday, so we have some works from december as well. this one's a bit of a weird one for the total word count, you'll see why

it's all treebark from my sideblog / alt ao3. i cannot change. i will not change. for these im just gonna specify the relationship that's the main focus bc thats easier than fandom bc all but like one are third life

dandelion wishing

(Dec, 2.4k, treebark, oneshot) (link)

op movie 6 au for dogwarts in which Martyn is the baron and Ren doesn't know he's dead

id actually plotted out a whole third life au for this movie like months prior and really wanted to write it, so i took it for treebark week and focused it just on these two. it's my fave movie of all time and i obvs had to give it to my fave completely dead team <3

i will admit tho. it did make me back search martyns twitter to see if hes ever posted abt watching this movie. bc i know he likes One Piece and i realized this would bring me into the danger zone (he hasnt ever posted abt it if hes seen it)

A Romance Route for the Doomed Villain?!?

(Dec, 5k, treebark, oneshot) (link)

treebark dating sim isekai parody that spiraled out of my control made in a day-long possession

im still baffled by this one. why was the response to this one so insane?? there was smth in the water the day i posted this bro. a 1:2 kudos to hits ratio for the entire first day is literally fucking unbelievable. 70 comments?? what hold did this fic have on you people. i got fic written about this one?? my friends goncharov'd me in front of my face

really fucking fun to write and the insane response was smth im always gonna remember. i appreciate you guys so much

treesekai also turns a year old in a few days!

Until the Angels Realize You're Not One of Them

(Feb, 7.2k, emerald duo, oneshot) (link)

a traitor phil au which was mostly just me talking about all the reasons i love technoblade

this one... wasnt actually written this year for the most part? i didnt want to not acknowledge it, since it's on my ao3 in this year, but i wont be able to count it toward the total

still. traitor phil au my beloved. hearing him say on his stream he and techno wanted to do a betrayal arc made me feel insane bc i already had this written at the time

missing or obstructed

(2022-present, 12.9k, Grian & Ren, ongoing) (link)

post 3L fic about Ren and Grian seeking out closure with a lot of funny little sleep metaphors

same deal as the last fic, i, uh dont think i actually wrote anything new for missing or obstructed this year either? just uploaded chapters i wrote last year,,, i didnt wanna now acknowledge it, but i wont count this in my total later

i miss her. one day ill actually sit down and write more missing or obstructed. in my doc im JUST at introducing Martyn and i havent written it yet

to reach my mangled debut

(Sept, 4.2k, treebark week, ongoing) (link)

it wouldnt be me if i didnt have an execution somewhere in here. another op au!

THIS. I LOVE HER. when rev and i were plotting out the whole storyline for smop renchanting i was begging please give me this scene i need it and i had so much fun writing it. i rlly need to finish soon but i haven’t had time but please. please check out smop. she’s top of my priority list to update

Three-Dog Night

(Sept, 6.7k, treebark week, oneshot) (link)

BIG DOG. beauty and the beast au!

god im so fond of this au. there’s some rlly good scenes written for this and unposted bc i just need to link them together. honestly i think if i took a month and focused it on this fic alone i could fucking finish it but i don’t have the time ;-;

that said i’m so enamored w this au genuinely. o dunno what else to say i just think. puppy

Cover Me In Roses

(Sept, 3.3k, treebark week, oneshot) (link)

lamplight roleswap! put Martyn in a flower pot

i don’t feel as motivated to work on this one when i have lamplight unfinished so it’s lower on my priorities but know i have like an entire arc of this written and unposted. we just have a few paths for this one and i have to decide which one to use

it’s so wild to me lamplight has like. aus. like this isn’t even the only one? a roleswap. that’s insane? it’s wild that you all like lamplight enough i can even get away with this

First Sign of a House Fire

(Sept, 2k, treebark week, oneshot) (link)

i love superhero stories for two reasons: plots about secrets and adapting the characters to give them powers. this had smth fun for both of them

yellow rose isn’t super high on my list of priorities to update (i think the oneshot is interesting on its own) but one day,,,, it’s part of the many aus cherri and i have but it’s the longest for sure. the doc for just this au is like 100k words long on its own. at the time i draft this cherri and i are actively writing smth else for it in another tab. theres like 4 offshoots and im obsessed w all of them. we had to make ocs about this one. i’m excited to eventually add more to this series

actually that’s one of the scenes i’m most excited for and most dreading adding. we made a backstory oc and im SO attached to him and im excited to post a thing out there w him but. ough. whatever cringe is dead i’ll get there eventually and brute force my way into attaching you to our funky little robot guy

also love that this fic forced me to be decided on a docv characterization that i have to stick to. he may be a canon guy to martyn’s vtuber lore but he’s my oc now too

Blindsided

(Sept, 2k, treebark week, ongoing) (link)

pirate au and royal au based on a big secret and also stuffing a guy in a box and it's all stupid dramatic literally what else do you want or need in life

this is my wife. my favorite. my most beloved. blindsided gives me new illnesses and diseases. i have just one scene to write before i can update it and then i can continue unleashing her. god i love this fic the drama of it is SO fun.

the funny thing abt blindsided is i know all the plot chronologically but now how to Present it which is part of why i haven’t continued too much. eventually i will but until then know that one of the scenes im sitting on which has been fully written is one i think about constantly. hopefully when i post it cherri’ll let free the comic she did for it

i actually have the ending of this fic written i just need to get there lmfao. second on my priority list after smop i think

Cradle of the Leviathan

(Sept, 1.5k, treebark week, oneshot) (link)

i just love mer aus man. whats the point of it all if you cant have mer aus. just get a big ol fish

i have the ending of this au written as well and literally so little of the lead up. but this is pretty low on my priorities. i think this one stands just fine on its own. mer aus are nice like that

we actually have a few mer aus but for now i’ll be focusing on this one. i do have a few sweet post story things written for this one. maybe one day i’ll write enough to post em lmao

Lamplight AU

(2022-present, 47k, treebark, ongoing) (link)

renchanting dnd/fantasy au, martyn's a paladin and ren's a lamp

so i started this au last year. my wrapped last year said my total was 20k, so that means this year's total is.... 27k!

and… it was just lamplight’s birthday and i did all my appreciation for the fic and its readers then, but god. i love this fic so much and i love you all who have read it and been so kind about it. the amount of popularity it has makes it a bit nerve wracking to work on, but i still really want to see it finished. i hope to see the bulk of it done by this time next year!

Six Sentence Sunday

six sentence sunday is a challenge where i try to post six sentences i wrote that week every sunday, to keep me writing every week of the year! i do it over on my writing blog, @driflew

i did not keep up on my six sentences,,, i had a lot of sunday fencing tournaments. i did for ~33 weeks this year! thats a pretty good amount! i’ll have to be more on top of it next year tho

unpublished work

the last few years i havent included unpublished work, but with the extreme bulk of it, i wanted to note it down. cherri @/cherrifire and i have been writing a lot back and forth at each other in discord dms this year, and i wanted to include those in my count! bc holy fucking shit is there a lot of them

i didn’t include collab pieces, just pieces i wrote alone. i also only included the renchanting aus i share w cherri and scarian aus i share w flowey, nothing else—no unfinished lamplight or other independent pieces or oneshots, no original fiction for class, nothing. i also missed a few u haven’t moved to docs yet. so i’m lowballing by a few. thousands. of words

the total for those is...... 135k words! there is,,, something wrong with me

total and end notes

our total this year is...

187512 words!

that might be my highest word count yet! because i caught treebark disease. wild.

something really fun about this year to me is i really loved everything i wrote.

if you want to get me a gift or support me on my birthday… maybe try reading my work and reblogging it or leaving a comment! you can find my writing at driflew or skelew on ao3, follow my writing blog at @driflew, or even consider tipping my kofi!

thank you for sticking with me and supporting me this year! i really appreciate it! hopefully i can break 100k next year too!

[sammyluvr]

i feel like sam is such a good drawer, like he’ll make full sketches of you in like the most beautiful way and paint them and give them to you, like some might be provocative and some are js rlly cute and sweet. also if u buy him flowers he’d frame like a petal from each flower in the bouquet and write what date u gave them him in the frame.

this one’s more for if u n him were childhood best friends but he’d like make one of those flip books and draw it from like when u guys were kids and then to like now and it basically illustrates how he came to be in love with you and he’d have a letter attached to it as well and it’s rlly poetic that basically says how beautiful you are and everything and how he loves you and wants to be with you (the letter would be on tea stained paper in a tea stained envelope sealed with red wax) also he’d write it in like royalty cursive rlly posh n shit. and he’d like make a string of photos of you and him and hang it in ur room (the letter, flipbook, etc would all be in ur room and he’d put rose petals down and light ur favorite candles). also he’d give u books and books of his poetry he’d wrote with you in mind and also he’d make a CD or cassette of songs that make him think abt u, there’d also be a bouquet of ur fav flowers there too and ur fav snacks with a teddy and a handmade bracelet or necklace he made for u (he has matching). and he’d walk in with those puppy eyes as he stands awkwardly waiting expecting u to reject him bc he’s convinced himself u don’t feel the same way but u meet him with a kiss and then u guys make out and he asks u to be his girlfriend. from that day onwards you’re his forever muse.

also if he was feeling sassy or something he’d make that a scavenger hunt/wild goose chase around the bunker😋🤞

-💽

i love that he is canonically is shit at drawing (except for sigils and wardings and the likes) but that lots of us headcanon him as a good drawer <3 i talked about this with my darling blondie, i think he got good at drawing at stanford because he really liked trying new hobbies now that he can + because jess was an artist!! so they'd sit there and do art together, she'd do her artist stuff and he'd sit there and draw her agh <333

though i also really really like the idea that he started to like drawing and art as a kid because of how much time he spent alone in motels and all that with nothing to do. so he'd just grab a spare piece of paper and random pen and just sit and draw <33

AGH THE FLIP BOOK IDEA T_T sobbing that is the most adorable ever aghhh <33 him going all out to ask you to date him is so very sweet sigh. i feel like in the hunting world he'd have to go with something simpler, and i think he likes that and makes it very special no matter what, but it's so sweet to think about him having the time and energy and ability to show his abundant love for you with a very physical manifestation <33 i love it a lot, you absolutely are his forever muse ahhh <33 crying so much about him.

[theinkymystery]

Hello to the Author and Editor of Inky Mysteryy!!! I've really liked your work and i consider it as special since it really influenced me(or im just easy to influence) and everything about it UGHHHHHHHHH ITS SSOOOOOOOOOO GREAAAAATTTT anywayss, Inky Mystery made me do lots of fanarts, A WHOLE BUNCH. I mostly posted them in my acc (new to tumblr anyways) and their descriptions too. Here's some of my fanarts:

(sorry for the fold Hehe)

Play the Exit Song (ik its messy XD)

Anyways, the Not-cup character doesn't exist, i just misinterpreted him as an actual one, which i know isnt canon but i did it anyway XD

Double Trouble version 2(version 1 is unfinished tho and is digital, i got lazy to finish it so HAHAHA v1 features only Mayhem and Holly, while this one adds Cuphead nd Not-Cup)

The Slap scene after the Gala (still disappointed to Cup for his actions, great writing btw, it really made me feel the characters, specially Holly my fav)

Letter-less version

The Marvelous Mayhem (she's one of the most mysterious character if ya asked me, i also liked her bcoz of this and i often doodle her)

Lukahd, infamously known as The Lady of Despair (anime style)

Angel-Demon War but only shows Ventis and Lukahd

(srry that its landscape)

And tthis is how i imagine Metatron would look like( i purposely didn't put his halo bcoz it was takenby the Guardian Angels at some point, right?)

Welp, thats my favorites!(sorry for the bad lighting and blurry cam tho) Hope ya like it. You really have great writing skills and im curious about the timeline of when the parts were distributed and hidden by the micco, angels and dishes. Tho, don't answer this one if it needs ta give us spoilers. Also Mayhem's origin, how the Night terror has been now and about what Cuphead felt after he hurt Holly's feelings. (curious for the latter). For the tear tho that a certain cat god fixed, was it like a tear in a paper? Since they live in a 1930s cartoon style right? So it may be comparable to a torn paper with a tape XD. I really like Holly and i was new to the Colly ship when u broke my heart. I was rlly disappointed with Cup's actions, and it was all bcoz of your great writing! I hope they can get the last part and find the Ink Machine on time, I rlly miss their old selves, where they were still happy. I just wanna how u these fanarts of mine, icant rest easily knowing that my favorite author wont see my fanarts(and how much i dedicate to it and love the fanfic novel)

Anyways, that's all i wanna say XD (too many, troublesome me) you have great writing, i love ur work and prolly i wont stop at making fanarts of it XDD

These are BEAUTIFUL arts! Thanks so much for sharing them!

Yup! The tear was sort of like a tear in a piece of paper. :)

[everythingispirates]

What is One Piece

ONE PIECE is the best pirate media I've ever consumed which should tell you how warmly I recommend it considering the like. blog you're on rn. it's a manga, anime and upcoming netflix series and I'd recommend checking the live action out if you're curious abt it since the anime is kind of horrid pacing-wise (tho with great va's and music so if you think you can stand it be my guest). if the la sucks then check out the manga instead it's some of my favourite character work and worldbuilding of all time. everything abt it is just so incredibly vibrant and FUN like a central theme of the story is just like. joy and laughter and all that but it is also about defeating fascism with the power of incredible violence so it's multifaceted. the story is like so so much but very basically it's biggest treasure known to man is on an island only one crew has ever been able to reach and our mc is going to get his rubbery little hands on that thing. on the way he picks up a zany crew all of them are fantastic characters and together they make me cry with how much they love each other and are a family and all that it's beautiful. cw for like one million instances of child abuse bc everyone has a tragic backstory, also like a few genocides bc like I said fascism. cw for freak stuff is there's an imo rlly clunky racism metaphor don't care for that shit and also the way the story handles queer ppl specifically trans ppl is just a fucking. rollercoaster so beware of that I think it's nuanced but there are some really low lows. also art style is kind of nightmarish sometimes between the loop lips and the female anatomy but that's rlly all I can warn for off the top of my head and bear in mind this is a genuinely giant piece of literature so you can basically find like. anything in it. anyway sorry it's like p late and this is the kind of subject that will get me absolutely chatting so I'll stop for now. watch one piece on netflix when it drops this thursday or read the manga if you're truly based. my final message. goodbye

[modpoppy]

favs from all my fandoms (new and old)

some of my favs from each fandom ive been in like ever

genshin impact: my fav of all time kaeya alberich i love him Very Much So, hes just one of those characters who its like. UGH. where he just wants to be sweet but cant let himself get too comfortable where he is (literally in his case). i also relate to him irt my relationship with my family/sibling. hes just constantly aware of other people both to be cautious and to know the people he cares about more, hes been shown canonically to pay close attention and provide gifts that he knew people wanted

runner up is ZHONGLI i related to him very much but i fogrgt why rn lol

kingdom hearts: xion, not for very long but right around when i was finally actualizing my gender identity (id previously been very agender/masc) i rlly took to xion for like. Gender Inspo. i felt like even tho she got the short end of the stick she did her damndest to forge her own identity (roxas got his whole game and arc about it while xion bascially got fridged but its fine). when i finally let myself consider who i would be as a fem person, i pictured her :D

one piece: sanji!! i already sorta liked him (okay maybe not in fishman island or thriller bark. that was. shit.) before heading into whole cake but. lord almighty. lemme tell ya i dont cry very easily over anime but whole cake took me OUT. sanji just tries so hard to be someone who doesnt cause the problems, hes cringe fail but he tries so hard to just be ALLOWED to exist bc hes fought so hard to believe he SHOULD uugggghhhhhhhhhhh. irt the straw hats i think he has some of the most unique and fleshed out philosophies (not wasting food) that his backstory perfectly contextualizes. also im on board with trans fem sanji

runner up is YAMATO he is so beautiful AND hes a kinnie whats not to love im just mad hes not in the straw hats (yet)

total drama: svetlana this was legit the only gif i could find of her on here. i dont need to explain myself svetlana sweep 🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️🤸‍♀️

jjba: doppio/diavolo its FINE it COUNTS but technically 90% just doppio..... back in 2021(?) i dyed my hair like diavolo (pink with green spots) i feel like thats. all i need to say

ace attorney: to the surprise of absolutely no one THE PHANTOM ive just always attached to the whole. Not Being thing. in the past i struggled rlly hard with depersonalization/derealization/dissociation/basically every manifestation of the phantom, so id connect to them (which i dont think helped lol). nowadays, i focus rlly hard on the idea of the phantoms semi-redemption bc its like... being a person not being a required prerequisite to existing/being in society if that makes sense???? its complicated and probably only makes sense to me :P

runner up is obviously UENDO+ i love them all tell no one but i think kisegawa is my fav i wish she got more lines i actually only watched soj for them bc at the time everyone said the game was literal ass

(dw athena is in close third place shes literally my daughter)

rvb: if you asked me while i was a fan id probably say agent maine but in retrospect grif was clearly my fav, especially later in the show when he was one of the few leads who had a genuine character arc. he feels the most like a real person idk man

silent hill: every fucking gif of henry is him busting his ass thats all that needs be said

danganronpa: i changed favs very often bc i had zero idea what constituted well written characters lmao i have ~eclectic tastes~ but the main character i rlly liked was touko/syo, her arc in despair sisters afairc was decently well done and her relationship with komaru was sweet, even if dr is kinda an inescapable grease fire. in hindsight, i think i also related more to her than i realized bc of her self esteem and the way her trauma/phobias seemingly blocked her from basic self care/socialization but it was really more about her never having the courage to push her own boundaries (idk how well thats shown in the game but that was my experience)

runner up: korekiyo bc i liked him a lot for longer than most othr characters but afairc my perception of him was VERY heavily based on headcanons/fanon so i doubt id like him at all on a replay. best guess is id only maybe like shuichi or something. pretty much everyone in dr is an asshole tbh i cannot emphasize enough how ass my taste used to be my ability to pick characters i like boiled down to someone telling me a character was cool and i immedaitely absorbed them

pjo: okay so this bitch is in a book so ofc theres no gif for him but jason grace is the funniest motherfucker on the earth. half the time id say something out loud while reading and hed immediately say that exact thing. absolutely exquisite. bro had no idea what the fuck anyone was saying half the time

twst: i started playing for ruggie but immediately deuce also proved to be the funniest motherfucker ever i dont think ive ever seen his gimmick in anything else its so fucking funny i live for characters who seem like the straight man but then turn out to be equally as batshit as their peers (i stopped playing bc i had been misinformed and thought this was a college but these are HIGH SCHOOLERS why am i being isekaid into HIGH SCHOOL WTF)

now for some misc favs bc theres not really a fandom for them per se

i love him and he is me

oh my god and i found a gif of my favorite scene i love steven i also want to . attack him sometimes

[lobotemi]

formulating small thoughts on all of the sinners in limbus so far (some vague limbus company spoilers, LARGE TEXT WALL WARNING):

yi sang - the blorbo. the scrimblo even. he is definitely one of my favourite sinners after canto 4 (will post my full thoughts on that later) which is surprising because i didn't really like him that much before at all. i was really neutral on him but canto 4 has just made me love him to bits

faust - she is super interesting to me, considering her source material i think she has the potential to have the best canto. i am also just constantly entertained by her antics (hell's chicken was the BEST for getting to know everyone a little more outside of the main plot. i'm super excited for 4.5) it's obvious she's hiding something, i think dante even mentions as such, but i think that makes her cooler. she is the one who (presumably) recruited all the sinners and vergilius, so she's rlly rlly interesting and i hope we get to know more soon (soon as in 2 YEARS WHEN HER CANTO IS OUT)

don quixote - definitely top 3 sinners for me, she's everything... she grew on me so much, after things like her moment with sinclair, the facade slip in canto 2... she's just super interesting to me and i'm really excited to see what comes with her canto. plus her favourite moment of mine which is the bongy chicken log where she talks about eating the chickens, and then proceeds to not own up to it. phenomenal job don

ryoshu - hellscreen is one of my favourite pieces of literature referenced by limbus, and it's real fucked up. ryoshu is very entertaining to watch, though she rarely speaks. seeing sinclair translate her acronyms is very silly and overall as a character i really like her so far. excited to see what's to come for her

meursault - i like meursault, there's no one i actively dislike, but i'm just neutral on him. he's cool i just dunno how to feel about him yet. his source material is cool though i'm excited to see how his canto goes. his moment in hell's chicken was silly and made me like him a lot more

hong lu - he's silly. i think all of the sinners are silly but hong lu takes the cake. though after canto 4 i've started respecting him a lot more, he can be really mature and he is a sweet little guy he's just a little dumb sometimes. i really enjoy his presence in the group though, he's great, i can't wait for his canto (though i'll probably never read his source material because of its sheer length, but i'll probably force myself to eventually because i am interested). thank you project moon for making me read classical literature

heathcliff - funnily enough heathcliff was one of my least favourites out of the group at the start of the game, but he is definitely one of my favourites now. it's been really sweet to see him gradually start to care about the other sinners and he has mellowed out a lot which i appreciate. wuthering heights is cool and i'm excited to see his canto (which i think is coming after ishmael's, so hype!)

ishmael - ISHMAEL. she is amazing. wonderful. beautiful. i'm not sure if i'd say she's my favourite sinner but she is definitely in my top 3 with donquixote, though if you asked me idfk who else is in the top 3. SO excited for her canto and she seems really interesting from the tidbits we got about her so far. like, she's gone to the outskirts? i hope she finally gets the closure she needs and deserves (..and we get a sea shanty from mili LOL)

rodya - the mother of the group... rodya was another character i didn't really care for at the start of the game but she's SO sweet and i don't understand how i didn't like her. canto 2 wasn't my favourite but it was really silly and i hope she gets another focus canto at some point because it feels unfair that sinclair and yi sang (and probably everyone else from this point) get a mili song but gregor and rodya don't??? i dunno, i really like both of them and i think it's a shame since their arcs didn't feel complete.. so hopefully she gets more spotlight!

sinclair - sinclair is very very cool. i like him very much, his canto was really interesting and kromer was a really cool villain, i like seeing him slowly gain confidence over the story and demian looks to be a really cool character as well. like gregor and rodya, his arc didn't feel fully complete to me (?) but hopefully he can get more of a spotlight in the future despite canto 3 being phenomenal already. i am not opposed to more sinclair content, he fits in the group really well and he bounces off the other sinners well. i really like him!!!

outis - words cannot describe how excited i am to learn more about outis. she's such an asshole but we support women's wrongs. was there any need to make fun of sinclair like that in canto 4? no, but she did it anyway. she seems to give less and less of a fuck about maintaining her relationship with dante every canto and i find that hilarious, outis is amazing. i'm really excited for her canto, i like her a lot

gregor - he is done so wrong in his canto. SO WRONG... gregor deserves the world, all he has ever done is be a cool guy to the rest of the sinners and he was the first person to kinda be nice to dante. and that was from the start as well. massive respect to trauma dad he is amazing. i hope he gets more spotlight soon, he works so well in the group and he has such fun interactions with everyone.

dantehh - they're so cool. they're so amazing. shuckaroonies they are a really interesting character. i really REALLY appreciate that they're not a self-insert because i think that would shatter my soul. i'm really interested to find out who they are, how this whole reversing people's time came from and where they came from because faust seems to know who they were before. they are a very good executive manager. well done on scoring those goals for lcg you absolute legend

these obviously aren't my full thoughts on all of the sinners, i'd love to do individual posts analysing all of the sinners and possibly a post with predictions about the next cantos based on the their respective source materials. but this is just how i feel about them after engaging in limbus for about 2 months and getting into lobcorp and ruina. (if you have read this far, and somehow haven't played these two games, PLEASE PLAY THEM THEY ARE SO GOOD...........)