#//((A few pics of everyone and a little bit about them and their verses.

[makaylan]

hey, hey everyone! this is gonna be a little bit of a diary-entry/mini rant, so if my ramblings-on don’t interest you, please scroll ahead! though i would really appreciate if you stuck around :)

If any of my dear friends have noticed, i have been MIA on here for quite a while now, but especially since s3 aired. I have felt a huge disconnect from Bridgerton and the fandom as a whole, from around the time that promo was really heating up for s3. I’ve spent the same amount of time wondering why, over analyzing my feelings, and just generally being confused. I initially brushed it off, as I’ve had a lot going on in my personal life that was taking much more of my attention, but now that I’m feeling a little better mentally, the questions on why i feel so disconnected have come back.

Firstly, i think the way s3 was promoted left a bad taste in my mouth. I won’t go on about Nic or Luke N because they are certainly not the first leading couple of a piece of media to promote in this way, and they certainly won’t be the last, but yeah, weird. Additionally, all of the Bridgerton themed advertising was so over the top, that I was seriously wondering if Netflix was going bankrupt. I mean, a Bridgerton themed allergy medicine? What the fuck? What happened to the weirdly flavored teas with badly photoshopped pics of characters slapped on the front?

Then, s3 dropped. I binged part 1 in one sitting, and was left feeling very confused after i was done. I felt numb, almost. Here was a love story I was so anticipating watching come to life, finally in front of me on my screen, and I felt..severely underwhelmed. The acting felt stiff, the script felt shoed-in and cheap, just generally off??

Part 2 was much better in my opinion, and it even moved me to tears a few times, but i had to agree with the majority of the Polin stans- there were too many other storylines. Now, this isn’t a new thing for Bridgerton by any means, but this season just felt REALLY overpowered by way too much shit going on. I felt very confused by where the Kanthony storyline went, Ben’s storyline felt forced and like a shoe-in for fans begging for him to be queer, and it felt like they kept changing where they wanting Cressida to go AS they were filming. Those are just surface-level thoughts and feelings, but i hope it all made sense.

I would really love to be back in the Bridger-verse with all of the incredible friends I’ve made, but I don’t want to force myself to feel a certain way, I’ve never been able to fake it till I make it, and I would never want to lie to to my friends. However, I do really miss my friends and would love to talk sometime if they were also somehow missing me like I miss them. :)

If you’ve read this far, thank you. I really am looking forward to s4, to the knowledge that we now have our Sophie!!! She is gorgeous and I can’t wait to see where Luke T goes from here. I haven’t lost all faith. I’ll most likely be back as things pick up again, when filming is supposed to start in Sep.

Love you all, and I hope to hear from you/see you soon!!!

[mashmaiden]

The long story no one asked for!

So, my trip to LA. Holy crap what an adventure! Absolute whirlwind experience but totally amazing!

So last Tuesday, at like noon my time, the main casting director for NCIS and NCIS: LA posted on Instagram about an NCIS-Verse themed picket event the following day at 9am. Now, I live in Phoenix, which is about a 7 hour drive away from LA. It's doable alone, but a bit hard to go there and back in a day by yourself. But I decided I'd do it if I had to!

As an alternative, I looked at flights and buses, and found that Greyhound prices were about the equivalent of what gas would cost me, and that sold me. Bought the ticket and had about 5 hours to get ready to leave on an overnight bus. So I left my house at 10pm, parked at my friend's house, took the light rail to the bus stop, and got on a way too cramped bus at 11:30pm and headed to LA!

We got into Downtown LA at 8am. I caught an Uber to a neighborhood adjacent to Paramount Studios, got some coffee and walked toward the gates.

A little preface before we get to the rest of the stuff you guys ACTUALLY want to hear about. So, when I posted the Rosa pop on Instagram before the series finale, Natalia (the actress who plays Rosa), followed the account, and reached out, mentioning she would love a Rosa Pop of her own. I told her I could make her one if she wanted. When I posted to my insta-stories about potentially coming to the Strike that day, she messaged me with a "I hope I'll get to see you there!" So part of the 5 hours I had to get ready included finishing painting the Pop I'd created for her.

AT THE STRIKE

After checking in, I got a SAG strike sign and started wandering around. I saw Medalion (Fatima) and Kavi (Shyla) and Gemmill from afar, but was too chicken to approach any of them at that moment. I reached out to Natalia via IG and she said she was nearly there. A few minutes later, she and her boyfriend Nick arrived, and I went up to them. I presented her with her pop but offered to hang onto it for the time being (she only had a small bag with her, and the pop was in a box). She in return, had a gift for me! She framed a copy of the call sheet and sides (that day's script pages) from one of the days of filming the S13 finale episode! Totally unexpected and so sweet!

So the three of us walk around in the circles in front of one of the gates for a bit, and then we wandered over to the writer's strike checkin booth, where there was a small sign, indicating the "NCIS" meetup was at the OTHER gate. We head over there, and Natalia immediately spots a few of the writers/actors and we head their way. She introduces me to them - I think at this point it was Justin, Matt, and Duncan (Castor/COD's stand in -- he loved the Hetty pop!) - and we chat for a bit. I mentioned how my desire to do film work was started by all of our "ideas" we'd come up with for alternative plots, and one of them actually asked me what my favorite idea was! I half blanked, half chickened out, and kinda fumbled my way through the question.

After that, I ended up behind Kavi while we were stopped at the crosswalk, and I actually worked up the nerve to introduce myself to her. Told her how much fun I found Shyla, etc. She loved the Pops, and was so shocked that I came from Phoenix, that she started telling EVERYONE she saw about it. Around this time, we noticed Dani was on the corner, talking with other NCIS peeps (I think this is when she was taking the pics with Vanessa, Brian, etc), and Kavi asked me if I'd met her yet. I said no, and she was like "well we have to change that".

A few minutes later, Dani starts walking the circles with the rest of us, and as she passes us, Kavi gets her attention, literally DRAGGING me by my arm to follow her. She again repeats my bus tale, and I get to show her the Kensi pop. This moment was captured as a beautiful candid pic by one of the photographers who has regularly been taking/posting pictures of the strike.

Dani asked if the pop was for her. And, I'll admit, that was not my intention when I went, as the wedding Kensi was a little beat up, having traveled across LA with me 3-4 times by now. But, how could I say no?! So, now wedding Kensi is in the hands of her inspiration! *squee*! Beyond that, Dani and I talked a bit about working in the industry, I mentioned how I wasn't quite decided on where I'd end up, but was looking into writing and creative producing. She admitted to not being so into the writing side of things herself, but she enjoyed the directing/producing/acting side.

As we were standing there talking, we were surrounded by mostly NCIS: LA cast/crew members and someone suggested doing a group picture. I was in the middle of the mass of people, and no one made me move, so I somehow got to take part in the super cool group pic! lol.

I also managed to get one-on-one pics with with Erik Palladino (Sabatino), Don Wallace (Navy SEAL Frank Wallace), and Kavi. I got one with Natalia too, but not on my phone. I saw so many people I recognized from behind the scenes of the show, but didn't get to talk to everyone.

About noon-time I got picked up by the wonderful @anonkp who took me to a delicious lunch in Larchmont Village. Then she dropped me off near the bus station when she had to go back to work. But I had a few more hours to kill until the bus came, so I rode the metro line down to Santa Monica, took a few pics at the beach from far away, made my way back, and got on my bus!

I was REALLY hoping to sleep on my way home. By the time it got dark, it was 9pm and I was running on the short spurts of sleep I got on the super cramped bus on the way in. I wasn't as cramped on this bus, and I had the row to myself this time, so I started to try to nod off for a few hours... and then our A/C died. Just as we entered Arizona, of course. So we made an extra stop on the way home just so we could cool down from the hot bus. I finally pulled into my house at 3am, 29 hours after I'd left the day before.

And that's the crazy adventure I had! But it was an absolutely wonderful experience, and I'd happily do it again if given the opportunity! lol. (Even if I'll probably be remembered as "the girl with the dolls" from here on out!) I'm probably forgetting 800 things, but this is already too long! 😂😂

[ryehouses]

i was tagged in this by @bobafett, who wants to bring back ask box games! this was really fun and really helped drive home the fact that i am maybe a little too wordy!

y'all know the drill. copy, paste, fill in your own answers! feel free to share!

How many works do you have on AO3? impossible for me to say because i have shed ao3 handles like a particularly robust hermit crab, but if i'm just counting everything under iridan, thirteen!

What’s your total AO3 word count? ......1.3 million, as iridan. if we throw in some of my other psueds and the truly awful eragon fanfiction i wrote when i was fourteen, we're probably loking at 2 - 2.5 mil.

What fandoms do you write for? presently, star wars, jujutsu kaisen, star wars again. i have some witcher fic in my gdocs and older projects in rdr2, dishonored, anything that can catch and hold my attention for long enough for my brain to produce a bit of dopamine,

What are your top 5 fics by kudos? all five of them are in the ast 'verse except for lost country

Do you respond to comments? i try to, but it's really hit or miss! i am painfully shy and usually can only go '!!!!!' in thanks

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? of my completed fics, none! i am not really in to the angst ending. if i ever do get around to finishing it, i started a dishonored/his dark materials au that would have ended with corvo going slowly, gently nuts and taking over the outsider's place in the void

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? i like happy endings, so all of them!

Do you get hate on fics? occasionally. i still think about that one commentor on ast who accused me of blaming the jedi for order 66 like, all the time. mostly no, though, everyone is really nice!

Do you write smut? If so, what kind? i've been told that 'wrestling as nasty foreplay' is something of a signature move of mine, so! 1) yes and 2) whatever kind of smut 'wrestling as nasty foreplay' applies as

Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? yes, but almost exclusively his dark materials crossovers. i do have a witcher/temeraire fusion au sitting in my gdocs

Have you ever had a fic stolen? no, not that i'm aware of. i do semi-frequent google searches to see if my shit pops up anywhere.

Have you ever had a fic translated? i don't think so! ast was podfic'd, if that counts.

Have you ever co-written a fic before? i don't think so, because i am a whole idiot and am hard to collaborate with.

What’s your all time favorite ship? of ALL TIME? impossible to say. i am inconsistent and flighty. bobadin hit me pretty good, though

What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? haha too many. i started a jedi!din fic and didn't get far. i've had several WIPs on ao3 sit without an update for years. i have drafted, redrafted, and drafted again a novel that will most likely never see the light of day. finishing even one of those would likely water my crops for several years

What are your writing strengths? i take particular pride in my settings! somebody on ao3 told me last week that i have nice turns of phrase, too, and i am proud of those too

What are your writing weaknesses? i have never once said anything in six words when i could say them in six hundred million billion instead

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? obviously i've experimented in various projects, but i am fundamentally kind of lazy and prefer to sprinkle in a few words here and there instead of spending the time to learn about another language's grammar structure

First fandom you wrote for? the first fandom i published anything in was eragon, way back in the day! the first fandom i wrote for was his dark materials, in a composition notebook in like the fifth or sixth grade!

Favorite fic you’ve written? could not possibly pic! they are all like my children and also my therapist.

i'm tagging @meyerlansky and anybody else who wants to participate! consider yourself invited!

[puppy-phum]

So I thought maybe Taylor Swift’s red with PuenTaylay since their colors are blue lol. Idk. I honestly can’t think of a good quote. If you think of one and tag me that works too 😂 I just want to see JimmySea on my dash again 😍 I miss them already

hello deanna ♥

i am somehow so very grateful for this prompt :'D it was delightfully vague despite being so straight to the point, and this is why i decided to both follow it and not follow it at all.

here's the result

everyone keeps telling me puentalay are taylor swift coded but i've never really listened to taylor swift that much (i don't really count the radio hits i was subjected to throughout my life). so this was my excuse to finally get into her music! mostly through jessi's @patprans amazing vv edit from a while ago. i went through that whole list of songs in it and i have to say it was a journey.

from it, this love stuck with me the hardest. tbh i cry with it now if i listen to it bc it feels so right for these two. so thank you to you both for opening my eyes, i suppose XD not that i ever really was against any of this, i just didn't have the right motivator before. now i had that and the time. it was fun ♥

and don't worry, i also looked into red! i do know that song haha, i haven't grown up under a rock after all. but i had to look at the lyrics properly and i do get where you're coming from with this prompt. i can feel puentalay there, especially bc of the colors. which i wanted to hold onto even when i abandoned the song itself!

so there's blue, as their beginning and ending. there's black and gray for the missing part, for the loss and grief and longing. and then there's red towards the end for the love! which. truly if loving puen is red am going insane for a little bit. we have had the convos about puen and red, am not digging into that again.

i just hope you like this! and thank you so much for joining in and always talking with me even when our tastes are very different ^^ i appreciate it a lot! have a wonderful rest of your week ♥

(some more rambles under the cut!)

i really love the way this song starts and how it seems to tell the whole puentalay journey in just, what is that, one verse? well, you know. in just a few lines we've come from their starting point to the inevitable tragedy of them having to separate, and then we've come to their reunion and persevering love.

so the edit tries to interpret all that. the first pic is about the water (which i've been thinking about so much and am going insane about it currently, there's so much Water!!), about how talay gets swept into this other universe and how he finds puen. which. i hope you get it that this is also about that glass house scene in ep 4 where talay runs through the rain to get to puen again. that's important. that's puen's tide - that rain.

and then there's a bit of fluff there. about the things they could go on and on about. about these moments where they find each other. about these moments where they... idk. are just lovely and in love. i wanted to show that.

bc i needed that before we hit the angst town! skies grow darker? currents come and sweep you away again? yeah, so true. puentalay literally just get together and then they're fighting which leads them to the secret island. which then, kind of, steals puen from talay a bit later. I tried to show all that too.

and then it's just. episode 11 part 1/4 heartbreak hours. that part is legendary and i love the angst so much even if watching it feels every time like someone is trying to carve my heart out with a plastic knife. but this line in the lyrics!!! it was just so perfect. gosh. (paired with the "and this love came back to me" like CMON i could make another edit only for that)

this then leads to the pink and the red. bc next we see what they had, what good things they got. the "silent screams" are, for me, about talay. about how he's saying he doesn't do love, doesn't really think about it, but still ends up seeking it. and idk, the dusty heart thing always gets to me. that's kind of his silent scream; talking about the love he does not want to the guy who wants nothing else but them to fall in love. how ironic.

puen got the "wildest dreams" then bc damn, that man has so many Wild Dreams. i didn't want to include the popcorn eating in this bc that would've made this edit cracky imo, so there's now just puen intensely staring at talay. this man is up to no good. his fantasies are horrible yet so, so cute. am so happy he actually got to finally live his popcorn fantasy XD what a doofus.

and then finally! all the things they never even dreamed about! aka everything in the our skyy eps. all of that was so good and domestic i bet they never thought they would have something like that. so that was for the last one. am kind of happy this took so long to make so i got those eps before this ♥ they're such a joy.

idk how much sense any of this makes bc it's 2am and my brain is fried but i just had to get all of this out. thank you once more for giving me this chance ^^ ♥

[suitsusboth]

Hey again, it’s the love light gleams anon! Omg I loved, loved, loved yesterday’s update. It was soo in-keeping with the Evie/Beckett dynamic when she first arrives at the cabin and he’s desperately wanting to kiss her, hold her, ask her to stay forever. Your chapter had that pining, yearning, emotionally repressed combination of Anthony and Beckett down so well! Would you ever consider writing a future chapter from Anthony’s POV or swapping perspectives? I’m super curious what he was thinking when poor Kate was self-doubting thinking she made him uncomfortable and that he doesn’t return her feelings!

Also, Kate’s ideas for the farms are so great! Reminds me of some of the farms I’ve visited in upstate NY and New Hampshire that have all these seasonal related activities such as apple-picking, bakeries selling apple-cider, apple cider donuts and apple pies etc, pumpkin patches and hay bale mazes. Then of course the Christmassy things for Winter. Cute baby goats for everyone! Lol now I’m getting carried away. But thanks again for the new chapter, you captured so well how there are so many things Anthony wants but doesn’t feel he can ask for. I’m so glad he has Eggnog to keep him company until Kate can return to Aubrey!!

PS ketchup on eggs is absolutely horrific! I’m with you and Ant there. So excited about Kate’s return to the farm and hoping for another Michael cameo!! 💕

hi hi hiii!

i'm glad you enjoyed it!

it's been interesting trying to meld them sort of, but i still want them to feel like kate and anthony. they are definitely different from their canon counterparts but hopefully you see them peek through. anthony is grumpy just like beckett and he's certainly not as wound up as canon anthony but he has that melancholy vibe still. family comes first to him still (he still thinks he knows best, but in a modern!verse he's been put in his place a bit more). love and loss still terrify him. and he's the nicest man in england aubrey (even though he grumbles most of the time). he's going to be different from beckett in a few ways -- he doesn't suffer from aversion of too much noise, but he doesn't like bit sudden noises (you find out why later).

kate i feel like i haven't quite hit the mark with. i don't think she's too similar to evie other than being burnt out at her job (which is fine with me tbh). she doesn't have the need to go anywhere -- that's why her trips such a big deal. she's be content to live her life in the same place, doing the same things for almost a decade. she's not a risk taker, she's not impulsive, she avoids change. i just don't know if i've captured her voice. idk.

as for a POV change i'm thinking about it, orrrr i'm just going to write a one shot from anthony's pov what he thought all through december. yet to decide. but i do know he's just met the most stunning girl who looked so alive on that empty street, who seems to be attracted to him too, who fits in with his friends/family, and is thoughtful and kind. snag is, she's only here for a weekend and his house is her only refuge. what creep makes a move on a girl when she's all alone in a place she doesn't know, a little tipsy and too late to go anywhere else if she's uncomfortable? could never be him. besides, it's not like she's going to visit again anytime soon. ;)

don't we all just want a little life on an idyllic farm? sign me up.

tbh i know anthony is more of a cat guy but i just saw that pic of the dog i used for the moodboard and had to incorporate it.

michael will be back a few times in this fic, so no worries there ;)

[curtainsfell]

AND INTRODUCING a young and bright-eyed newcomer to the stage, STERLING LECLAIR!

STERLING LECLAIR, a young man in the prime of his life! Born right here in our proud   c ity   ‘bM  ▐iN    ne ghberhood we     — ! ,  LeClair grew up with an absent father and an overbearing older brother. He spent his childhood playing baseball in the dusty streets, doing odd jobs, and hanging around our beloved Theatre. Once he’d picked up his reading, writing, and arithmetic, LeClair  nixed his classroom education in favor of learning from the genius of the Bard, and from the great works of our modern Ameri c n playwrights. The folks at the Empyrean will tell you hhe pic ked up on setcr aft from his keen                   eye for the stage. Self taught, a true self-made m an. Everyone’s kid brother! OUR SHINING LITTLE STAR! 

MR. LECLAIR has been working in stagecraft since his boyhood. His ascension to the sta gₑᵢₛ ᵤₙ ₚᵣₑc ₑ dₑₙₜ d his ahsnce n, js his Mr Sterling LeClair is a mere twe nty-one yearsof age. His impressive set work has been seen in such splendid works as      ,       , & mg       █       ! LeClair claims a lot of his talent is merely a side effect of his understudy with another renowned young stage actor you shou ld know, one  Marcus Barnum!  Quite a claim to fame for LeClair. Be sure to applaud for them both in their upcoming projects. 

AGE: 21

PRONOUNS: he/him

HEIGHT: 5’5

BODY TYPE: Lean & wiry

EYES: dark brown

HAIR: dark brown/black

ETHNICITY: German (father) & Korean (mother). Sterling is unaware of his mother’s heritage. He passes as white and looks at anyone askance if they suggest otherwise. 

SEXUALITY: bisexual

ALIGNMENT: chaotic good

MYERS-BRIGGS: ENFP

FACECLAIM: Ricky Kim

POSITIVES: spirited, passionate, amicable

NEUTRALS: impulsive, daring, determined

NEGATIVES: defiant, stubborn, irritable

HOBBIES: dancing, carnivals, baseball, arguing as a pastime, whittling, the arts, finding new speakeasies & dance halls

QUIRKS: fiddles with his shirt sleeves, “berries” is his “swag”/“poggers”

FEARS: helplessness, becoming his father

DREAMS: to be a well-known actor, to make a change in the world

MORALS & VALUES: Sterling’s preoccupied with justice & fairness. He’s a proud member of the Empyrean’s union and involved in grassroots socialist activism. He’s active in the queer scene of the time. He has no qualms with being a loud-mouth or resorting to violence when he deems it necessary. 

See, it’s his temper that would get him. But what a gas! He’d dance you all night long. And not afraid of anything! Oh, he’s awfully short compared to most fellas, only sta nds a few inches abo ve me, but you wouldn’t know it. He’s got some kind of presence, like a real stage star. And he’ll punch any man in the nose about, well, over nothing really. But you’d think he was made of sugar half the time. And he’s a terrible flirt. I think that’s what got him in the most trouble, at the end of it. Everyone knows  you don’t get mix ed up  with those big shot celebrity actors, and didn’t we all tell him. Men like that are trouble. But Sterling was the sort to go out and find trouble, anyway. Maybe he got what was coming to him. Oh, that’s awful to say, isn’t it? Don’t print that bit!

CAST OF CHARACTERS *These relationships are closed. Doubles of listed characters are welcome to take new roles or curate a new story with me.

@actliving as Marcus Barnum, the Actor

@lifetaking as Dorian LeClair, the older brother

Penny, the best friend

Clémence, her lover, abroad in Paris

Jonathan, the housemate

Amelia, his fiancée

STORIES & VERSES

MAIN CANON.   Exclusive with @actliving.   Sterling falls for his idol, one Marcus Barnum, and never stops falling. Canon is connected with the larger Markiplier Cinematic Universe & directly follows into @jumpinagain. 

ROARING CANON.  Sterling never meets the Actor, and the curse never falls on him, leaving him free to adventure in any direction he chooses.  Set in the year 1925 by default, but this can be adjusted at request. 

MODERN VERSE.  You already know what it is. Comes in several flavors, including but not limited to college era theatre major, professional set designer, and aspiring documentarian. 

ENTITY VERSE.  Exclusive with @actliving.  Sterling survives.  Or, the Dark finds its host before the events of WKM. 

CHILDHOOD FRIENDS VERSE.  Exclusive with @actliving, @the-actor-himself, & @splittinghares. 

& MORE TBA. For now, I am only listing fully developed verses I anticipate interest for. But one of my absolute favorite things about writing is putting my characters into new situations and verses, so please do make suggestions, no matter how odd or obscure. I would love to hear it! 

[pendles-is-friendles]

3. A favorite picture of your muse. And explain why. (you can pick which blog/muse)

Munday!: Accepting!

I... don’t have a lot of pictures of the current set of muses (’cause humans are really hard for me to draw and the nature of OCs and such), but I do have a fave pics of their prior verses.

Also, gonna do all of them so I’m gonna toss that under the cut for length.

Let’s start with FL4K, since they’re the active canon I have right now.  This gif’s my fave pic of them because it’s the first real look we’ve had into their personality and it’s just adorable.  This gif is why I hc the Jabbermon as being a mischievous little punk.  (It’s taken from the twitch ext. btw.)

As if people aren’t sick of seeing this one, I drew it and I’m still proud of it. I just wish I had the foresight to pick yellow over orange and blue over a different shade of purple or grey (drew it like.. right when they were announced and prior to the discovery that they’re NB.)

Ludwig, who’s currently in universe dev at the moment (and may get launched at Borderlands!verses soon might just make him a new blog specifically for that though since the oc universe needs its own place), doesn’t get a lot of love, but this is my fave pic I’ve drawn of him.  Just the ridiculousness of the pose and the fact that it’s kinda canon that all of the design changes for him are sudden mutations.  It’s also one of the few pics where my messier sketchlines really work with the piece instead of distract, imo.  

Though, I’m really proud of this one ‘cause it took me weeks to find out what colour this horse is.

Torque’s gotten the most art focus in the Blands!verse and has one of the best pics in the Battleborn!verse.  He’s also the most changed between the verses personality and looks wise, not just because of the change between species.  Specific things I like are the decision to use blood red as the shader for that bone mask and the details on the armour in the second one.  It took me a long time to get those lines exactly how I wanted them.

I only have the one pic of Blands!Rictus, but I got to show the glowy tentacles and his eyes.  He typically wears sunglasses to cover them and keeps his tentacles tucked in, but around friends he let’s them down, so to speak.

The second one is cropped, but it shows both some of his original design and also how the tentacles still work/attach.  They’re rooted along his spine and when I say they sink into his skin, that’s what I mean.  They legit look like tattoos until he pulls them out of his skin.

I spent forever looking for the full one of this, but this is the fave pic I’ve drawn of Vocatia.  Efforts to draw her human version hasn’t produced satisfying results yet.

Though, she still has this outfit, no matter the verse.

This is the most accurate human!TZ and it still doesn’t have half of his apparent scars.  

Though fave pic goes to this one when he was “stunt princess” for a day in his original universe.

I don’t have an accurate picture of human Bravo, but these two (with an extra TZ) show off her facial scarrage and a bit of both sides of her personality.  She’s always been deeply conflicted, but very good at hiding it when she wants.  She’s also always had her hair longer and favoured pink makeup as well. 

FU doesn’t have a lot of pictures, but her’s one with her original Battleborn armour and a little sketch of her face (also, bonus TZ... he pops up everywhere also it’s easy to do sketches of all of the clones together).  Yes, she literally taped glasses onto her armour in that verse to show she’s also a therapist. 

Whew, if you got to the bottom of this, you get a cookie.  I don’t have any pics of Argiope from either verse, sadly.  She’s really tough to draw because she has a human face that opens up into a split jaw kind of thing.  

[obeymeluv]

QUICK! KISS ME! [Bros x Reader]

A lead-up blurb before I go to bed.

School is killing me. This has been in the drafts far longer than I wanted.

No offense if your name is Bethany. It’s a name I picked at random.

The follow-up piece will have the kiss scenarios.

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Some of Asmo’s friends may have used you to get into a special makeup event, but it’s okay! They bought you a lip gloss as a thank you! The shade ‘Sealed with a Kiss’ was not what you thought it’d be

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Being one of the first humans in the Devildom could be uncomfortable and sometimes down-right dangerous! It also had its perks. To you, that meant being close with the Seven Lords of Hell (and Diavolo). To other lesser demons and classmates, you were kind of a ‘get out of jail’ free card.

Were they late to class? Oh, just helping the human out!

Caught sneaking in food or drink when they weren’t supposed to? It’s to split with the human, of course! They thought you’d love to try it!

Everyone was keen not to overuse it and you’d actually made good friends this way. It was starting to feel less like an excuse and more of a way to be included. You were the friendly, reliable human that had won hearts and saved some asses. As a thank you, one of your closer friends (a repeat offender for lateness), invited you out to an exclusive makeup release. She was a VIP member and had early access an hour before the store opened to the Devildom public. 

The fact that she chose you, a human, over some LITERAL century-old friends caused a bit of tension but she could care less. “I’ve seen them every day for over a hundred years. You get one year, and we’re going to make it awesome!” Bethany breezed through the store at a dizzying pace, picking through concealers and opening a box of mascara to look at the packaging. She moved at a pace only demons could manage; you thought you saw her by the nail polish display but when you looked again she was throwing sheet masks in her basket. Hooking her arm with yours, she picked up some foundation on the way back to the coveted display of lip glosses and lipsticks.

You weren’t totally versed in the differences between Devildom makeup and human world makeup. In all honesty, there didn’t seem to be a difference. Bethany swatched powdery cream lipsticks on her wrist and followed with ribbons of liquid lipstick. Every now and then she dotted them on your arm; she was adamant about finding a shade the both of you could wear as your thing.  

“This one,” she decided, waving the tube at you and booping your nose with it carefully. “This is our color!” she took you by the hand and joined the checkout line. She had two in her hand but refused to let you so much as hold one, wanting to pay for it first. It wasn’t technically breaking the purchase limit rule; if they tried to nag her she’d just say she was holding onto it so another demon didn’t bully you out of it. You didn’t know if it was her VIP status or the fact that her defense made sense, but you were able to check out without a problem.

A few sour faces and mean glares met you outside but Bethany ignored it all, eager to have a Devilgram-worthy celebratory snack break (snack victory? You know, since you got the makeup?) The plan was to eat, hold down a table at the nearby cafe while her other friends shopped, and have group makeovers (or try-ons) before calling it a day. That plan was interrupted three bites into a croissant sandwich when Lucifer summoned you back to the House of Lamentation. He’d gotten wind of all the girls you’d be with and didn’t feel totally comfortable letting you hang out with them,

Had Barbatos seen something? Did Lucifer feel spurned that you weren’t hanging out with the Seven Lords of the Devildom? He gave no answer, simply asking you to stay put while someone came to escort you back to the house. Bethany was put off by the turn of events but few people dared to complain about the Seven Lords due to their connections with Diavolo (she was no exception). “If we can’t get the full makeover, we’re getting the selfie!” she declared, deftly breaking the seal to her Sealed with a Kiss gloss and swiping it on with help from the front-facing camera on her D.D.D

You busied yourself with opening your tube. Before you could ask for her phone (since the camera was already open), she took the tube from you and tilted your chin up. She dabbed the center of your lips playfully before carefully tracing your lips with the color. The heat rose in your cheeks and she smirked. Being part succubus, she could draw energy from emotions like embarrassment and the feeling of being flattered. Her fingertips pulsed under your chin as she drew on that energy. 

Getting energy sucked could feel like a lot of things -- being light-headed, getting a rush of excitement, all prickly and tingly like your whole body was pins and needles. Whatever it was, it usually faded into drowsiness and kittenish contentment. She probably only touched your chin for seconds but the wash of coziness had you melting against your chair, your cheek cradled in her palm. 

Did she take the pic? What was happening? It felt like Asmodeus had materialized out of thin air, helping you stand and making small-talk with Bethany before pulling you away, out of her aura that was trying to suckle the vestiges of happy energy you offered.

“And what shade did you get on those pretty lips, hm?” the cotton fell out of your head and ears, allowing you to really hear Asmo now that the aura effects had worn off.

“Uh,” you fished around in your bag and looked at the packaging. “Sealed with a Kiss.”

Asmodeus stopped so abruptly it’d almost yanked you back to him. The two of you were barely tangled at the pinkies and now he’d completely laced your hands together. He held your hands captive, drawing them up in surprise and basically dragging you into his torso. You were forced to look up into glittering pink eyes and if you didn’t know any better, they looked a little panicked.

“How long ago did you apply it?”

“I don’t know.” you blinked helplessly at him. That energy suck thing had a way of making your brain tune out and turn to pudding. That aside, who knows how long Asmo stood there and talked to Bethany while you were being siphoned?! “Bethany applied it, not me.”

Asmo clicked his tongue, huffed, resigned himself to only holding one hand. and started scrolling on his D.D.D to find that selfie Bethany posted. You were being dragged along like a child as Asmo’s shoes clicked towards the House of Lamentation. It amazed you how well he could navigate his D.D.D with his long, painted nails. 

Whatever he was looking for, he found it.

Asmodeus tucked his D.D.D into his pants pocket, scooped you up in a way that terrified and amazed you (two people being supported by one set of heels?), and flew to the House of Lamentation. He didn’t always use his wings, as he preferred to decorate them and maintain them with oils, but the fact that he was flying made you nervous.

What had he found? What was the deal?

“Asmo--” you started nervously, the flapping of his wings nearly drowning you out as he pushed himself. Flying against the wind didn’t help. Your hair was a mess and the wind was in your face; the Devildom was always a little chilly but now it was enough to make your face tingly.

“She gave you enchanted makeup. There is a reason humans don’t use enchanted makeup.” Asmo’s pretty brows furrowed as he cut a hard angle and glided over a portion of the square. The tell-tale thicket of trees that lined the winding path back to the House of Lamentation were on the edge of the horizon.

“What’s going to happen?” should you ask that? Did you really want to know?

“You’ll feel something in your lips--some people felt tingling, some people felt pulsing, it can be anything, I think--and then they’ll seal shut.”

“SHUT?!” you yelped. It was enough to make Asmo wince. The startle carried over to his wings; they shuddered and locked; the two of you dropped for a heartbeat or two before he corrected himself.

“If I can’t get some makeup remover on it first.” Asmo panted, tucking his wings in and preparing for a quick descent. He wasn’t sure why he hadn’t thought to teleport first--the panic? Trying to one-up Bethany by walking home and being extra cute with hand-holding?--but a quick touch down could roll into a simple skip teleportation and everything should work out!

“But my lips are already tingly!”

“Ugh, Bethany! I can’t believe you! I mean, I can because it’s you, but really, Bethany?”

“Asmo, focus!” you’d already skipped several feet ahead, clearing the front yard in two teleports. The third put you in the foyer. “I don’t want my lips to seal shut!”

The House of Lamentation was huge but when the occupants had supernatural hearing, that exclamation turned heads. 

“What’s this about your lips sealing shut?” Lucifer appeared at the top of his stairs, his head already shaking.

“DID YOU MAKE A PACT WITH A WITCH?!” Mammon screamed down the hall, clearly not far behind.

Asmo scoffed, lowering his D.D.D with a pout. He was halfway up the main stairs, fingers working at lightning speed. “It’s the lip color!” he explained, stomping his foot. Noisy people were just so annoying! If everyone was talking he couldn’t explain! How rude! 

“All this over some makeup?” skeptical Satan peered over the banister, book and arm casually propped up on it.

“If two people apply the color and kiss, they’re locked in a makeout session until it dries down. When one person applies the lip color, they can use it like a cheat sheet to see who secretly wants to kiss them,” his words tapered out from authoritatively informed to quiet and shy. “It’s from their ‘Liquid Love’ collection.” he muttered into the stunned silence of the room.

You were trying to open your lips and ask why. The magic had already taken hold. Asmodeus could see you trying to move your lips and strain your chin. Luckily, demons could read minds. “It’s because Bethany is stupid.” Asmodeus rolled his eyes. “Ambitious, but stupid.”

“Please explain, Asmo.” even when using the dear nickname Lucifer couldn’t hide the demand. His demon aura was creeping up his body and slowly becoming jagged and suffocating.

“Bethany has had a HUGE crush on our little human here, and wanted to seal it with a kiss, so to speak.” Asmo’s cheeks got pinker and pinker as he explained. Mostly because he was mad he didn’t think about it. His heart did something funny at the thought of you kissing someone else. Lucifer also looked like he wanted to murder someone about now, and Asmo had to remind himself that he was being looked through, not looked at.   

“Just grab a napkin and wipe it off.” Mammon shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets.

Asmodeus shook his head angrily. “It’s too late now. We need to find someone for them to kiss! Someone’s lips will break the seal on theirs...that’s kind of the point of the enchantment.”

“So they just pick someone to kiss?” Levi’s face was turning tomato red. Would it be him?! It would at least be one of them, right? What if your person wasn’t in the House of Lamentation and you NEVER SPOKE AGAIN?!

“Sort of.” Asmo patted your shoulders with his gentle, smooth hands. He started to rub them like he was trying to warm you up. Partly in encouragement and partly to get your attention because he could feel your brain spiraling down into panic. “They basically follow their mouth.”

“So that lip color is like a crush detector?” Satan abandoned his book at the top of the stairs and was now perusing articles on his D.D.D as he sauntered down the steps. It sounded like he’d found the one that sent Asmo flying to the House of Lamentation.

“Basically.” Asmo sighed. It was the stupidest way to confess to someone, he thought. Demon to demon, it was fine. Demon to human?! NO! The whole thing gave him a headache. The fact that Bethany thought she could just steal your little lips and be greedy with them was the biggest annoyance of it all.

“So,” Satan’s green eyes cut sharply from his phone to you. The corner of his lips curled up in a smart little smirk. He knew it was wrong to find your predicament so funny, but this was a very human thing to get mixed up in. “Who do your lips want? Who do you feel yourself being drawn to?”

[half-doomed]

HELLVETICA DAY 1 - AUSTIN

- we got to the venue at 2ish and set up camp

- we were around the 21st in line (dont remember exact #s but it was low 20s because somebody else had started a numbering system)

- we met somebody who we played uno with but we didnt really talk to too many other people that day other than to give the people in front of us an umbrella

- we ended up at the barricade to the far left of the stage

- savannah conley was funny and has a great voice but i wasnt super into her music (I tried listening to her set beforehand but i didnt rly like the vibe)

- joywave was incredible live and daniel has a great stage presence. Their set was so high energy right from the start to the very end

- during tongues dan pointed the mic at somebody in the crowd who shouted the line and his face was priceless (pretty sure this is a fan inside joke but I'm not the expert on them)

- their visuals were also on point

- idkhow time!!!! Their visuals were also super cute and everyone looked like they were having a great time

- lights go down and heaven is a place on earth were not on the set ):

- BUT someone gave dallon a trans flag ((:

- during jw's set dan told us to cheer as loud as possible when dallon did his bit at the end about forgoing the crowd chanting for encore and playing peekaboo so when we heard the word peekaboo the crowd went insane. It was very funny and dallon thought so too

- dan did his own verse for nltob, it was very funny. I had avoided the videos of it til that point

- after the show, we met daniel who had seen my tour bingo card on twitter so he took the card and checked off everything that had happened on tour so far. He also signed the card and tour poster i made

- I almost argued with him about one of the things he checked off because i forgot that a letter is technically an unreleased idkhow song 🤦🏽‍��️

- I asked him if clibbus could open for dallas and he called beef over who said he would for $3000 but unfortunately he has a job to do so the answer was no 😔

- I also forgot to get a picture with dan bc i blanked but he was wearing an HHM shirt

- then anthony came out and i gave him the gift i made him and he talked about some gross strawberry water he had earlier that day

- he also commented on how me and my friend had matching strawberry shirts but it actually wasnt planned lol

- Ryan had run off as soon as we had gotten to the buses and anthony said he hadnt seen him since he got off stage

- he had said he would get the other guys their gifts but then dallon came out so i asked if i could give him his and he jokingly was like "you dont trust me?"

- dallon was very sweet, he was on vocal rest so couldnt talk but i gave him his gift and his appreciation was very clear through what i could see from his face (he was masked) and body language

- I'm an idiot and didnt even take pics of the completed gifts but trust me they were cute and when he heard how long they took to make his eye went wide (this is bc i only decided to make gifts after tour started and i saw they were meeting fans lol)

- I asked him to write out a lyric for a tattoo and told him that i've been a fan since basically the brobecks days and he made a motion like when i was little which i thought was rly cute

- he also wanted me to wait and think on it for a year before i got the tattoo

- he was incredibly nice and i forgot to ask him for a pic with his gift bc i was frazzled but i did get him to also sign the bingo card/poster

HELLVETICA DAY 2 - SAN ANTONIO

- We got there around 2 again but this time we started talking to more people and made a few friends including some people i knew from the jw discord server and one of my twitter mutuals

- The time went by much quicker when we had started making friends

- We saw ryan and anthony walking across the street at some point and they waved. I'm pretty sure anthony recognized some of us

- I wore glitter dots for this show and then right before doors I got sweat, makeup, dirt, and who knows what else in my eye so i went to the bar next door to use their bathroom and had to rush out bc they started letting ppl in

- We ended up barricade again on the right side this time

- Savannah's outfit was cute, and her music had started to grow on me at this point

- Joywave usually has a car on stage with car wash outfit/uniforms but the stage was too small so they instead played some older stuff from content which was a really special set just for us <3

‐ They also had everyone tweet about them being the best punk show that had ever played the venue

- Also this venue does not have a physical barricade and so we were pressed right up against the stage to the point where my friend got dan's sweat on her

- Overall a very fun silly intimate vibe

- Dan said this was the smallest venue on the tour and we'd be able to reach out to touch dallon's toothpick legs and he ran out on stage to whisper in his ear

- !!! He was in the shorts !!!

- During sound check i asked val if he got his gift and he said it was above his bunker 😭��� i almost asked him or eddie if they could give me a setlist but didnt wanna bother them while they were working. We also kept making awkward eye contact with beefus lol

- During idkhow's set anthony recognized us and gave us picks (:

- He was also wearing glitter! <3

- I'm pretty sure dallon heard us chanting die die die during choke bc he kept smiling in our direction

- When he said peekaboo a lot of us that were at the previous show cheered

- It was a very intimate show and not just bc dallon was showing off his legs lol

- Dallon was a lot more talkative and silly at this show!! He poked fun at guitar players and anthony's face was great

- Since lgd (and heaven is a place on earth btw) was back on the set he introduced it as they were playing an older song that was on the EP (he misremembered but none of us caught it til we were talking to him in dallas the next day) (more on this later)

- We also brought roses for both bands which will also be important later ! Some beautiful and iconic pictures came out of that, you can thank my roommate and i for getting dallon those flowers <3

- We didnt wait after the show to meet them bc we had a long drive the next day but we should have bc ryan was meeting people 😭

HELLVETICA DAY 3 - DALLAS

- We left late, then got stuck in rly bad traffic on the way in but dallon had a twitter q&a at that time so it made it just slightly more bearable

- We ended up getting there at like 5:30ish, about 30 mins til doors

- We actually still ended up 3rd row back from barriers and saw all our friends we made from the previous day (:

- Savannah's set was very enjoyable and her cousin and some other people were there

- Many ppl from the jw server were there so we went rly hard for their set and made plans to take a group photo with dan after the show

- I cant even remember much about jw's set bc i was going so hard but it was extremely fun. 3 nights in a row seeing them and i was still blown away each time

- We sat down in between sets bc we were all tired as hell and a lot of ppl joined us. I told them dallon would be very supportive of sitting in between sets. Everyone around us was very friendly <3

- Dallon was extremely silly during this show! The vibes were immaculate

- I'm actually gonna skip straight past the show bc i wanna talk about meeting them afterwards and I'm fighting for my life to stay awake rn

- We finally got to meet ryan!! I forgot to take a picture with him but my roomate got to talk with him and i got my cds and poster/card signed. I'm pretty sure he and paul got high after the show bc he completely misheard what i said when i asked if he got my cross stitching gift lol but we were both pretty out of it

- Like it literally took me 5 mins to realize dallon was standing near us bc i was busy talking to daniel

- I brought a the hoodies cd and he told dallon that that was his brobecks and that he would've hated them bc they were emo lol

- He signed my roommate's razzmatazz cd (lol) and i introduced him to my friend who shares his name

- I told him about how a lot of us from the server were there and he agreed to get a group pic with everyone

- Paul came out at some point completely zooted but i didnt get to talk to him bc i thought he was busy meeting other fans but he signed my roommate's hot dog bucket hat (we all had bought matching hats and dan was given one as well for the group photo)

- Dallon signed my pick that i got from anthony bc i didnt get a chance to talk to him again ):

- I did finally get a solo pic with dallon and he wasnt on vocal rest anymore so he stayed for a pretty long time to chat with everyone which was very sweet

- I did have a slightly personal question for him but i completely blanked and freaked out a tiny bit and he told me to wait a few minutes and it finally came back to me. I had wanted to ask him if he ever got my rose/gift card/letter in houston back in february. He said he didnt remember but that if he did it was probably in his house with the other letters he's gotten. He was very reassuring that he remembered faces and that having adhd made it hard to remember names but he always remembered faces. I said smth along the lines of it's great that he's learning more about himself since his diagnosis. Then he told me that he really appreciated the flowers (the ones from san antonio were in the tour bus) and that he enjoyed my presence and i didnt know what to say to that. I dont really know what happened immediately after that because that kind of a compliment coming from him completely scrambled my brain.

- He also talked about how he screwed up the lgd intro again in dallas and my friend mentioned that she thought he was introducing absinthe and that they should put it back on the setlist and he agreed. He talked about how lgd was supposed to be on the ep but they flipped a coin and got diatt i think instead

- He also told us that he was very excired about the idea for the new album and that it just needed to get recorded but he wouldnt give us any hints about the title or anything

- All my friends i had made at the previous show were there as well and we had a group pic taken with him. It was all so special and it was genuinely one of the best weekends of my life and I'm so sad that it's over 💔

And if you read this far thank you and I'm sorry

[xjustlikeyou]

The TAI/Midtown Aftershow

This is what I wrote when I got home re: the VIP experience of the Aftershow

Feel free to message/ask if you want clarification about anything because most of it is not even full sentences. It was just things I didn't want to forget.

(Also if someone has a better memory than me and has the actual Midtown set list - hit me up)

———

TAI soundcheck -

We were really late going in. Jon posted the pic of TAI soundchecking while we were all still in a line outside and we were all like ???? (Also this venue loved lines. We started in one, then went to another, then went to a third, fourth, and fifth).

We were kept in the venue for a bit and heard all of About A Girl in the stairwell before they let us in.

We walked in to everyone on stage but Will who walked in as we were filtering in and was so fucking bashful. I was directly in front of Will (and somehow survived).

"I left and went to the bathroom and came back and there's all these people here! How did that happen?"

They were all so fucking happy and playful and joking and teasing and complimenting each other which made my heart so happy. I legit never thought I'd see them together again - much less SO HAPPY. They were all so appreciative and I still can't believe it happened.

I think Carden talked the most out of all of them. Partly because Sisky didn't have a microphone unless he stole someone's which he did a few times.

After the first couple takes:

The butcher - “this takes the edge off”

Mike - “yeah!! It should always be like this. Like a soft opening. This is great. I love this.” 

Will - “Agreed. But it’s more, well more like a warm…no. It’s not. I’ve made it weird.”

I’ve already gotten so overwhelmed I forgot all that we saw

I know Big Mess, some of LAX, Bulls in Brooklyn, About A Girl again, Phase maybe? Def one or two from Almost Here. At one point they were going to do verse and a chorus of a song and we and Will kept going into the second before trailing off. Will shrugging and kinda giggling - "well, we all just got so excited - I forgot we were stopping."

GABE WATCHING THEM the whole time.  - Hugs all around and x2 for Will. He's so fucking proud of them. And supportive. Everyone deserves a hype person like he is for them. Jesus. I have so many feelings.

Mike (roughly): "So, uh. We've been rehearsing for this for a week now. It's really good to be doing it for people other than ourselves. I mean, Gabe flew in and sat on the ground and watched - he's actually over there still watching - and he said we were good but...ya know. We're glad you're here."

Will immediately starting to walk towards Gabe to get his hugs and then coming back, "Shhhh, he's not supposed to be here. It'll be our secret, okay?" DEAD. SO DEAD.

Fucking incredible vocals - Will sounded so so so good. They all did but I just. SO GOOD.

Ian being Ian - had his slide and wanted to play fancy things and was adorable

Sisky not having a microphone - "Yeah, why don't you?" "I don't know where it went." "We can get - " "NO NO NO no microphone."

Snakes on a plane - fan try outs - Sisky leading with Carden and everyone ragging on Gabe (who refused to come out but did pretend to take notes on everyone's performance). They pulled 3 people from the crowd to try out for the rap. Completely impromptu supposedly. Mike kept stressing they had not planned on doing this. But Sisky kept saying it'd been 17 years and he still hasn't figured out how to play bass and rap and was not going to try.

Will's panicked little "wait, what mic are they going to use? This one's mine" and cradled it to his chest broke me.

Sisky said it was going to be crowd participation but also sort of chose himself too.

Will had tea and was very precious about it.

“I’m warming up and so are you”

To go from shy and awkward to chills and just pure happiness

THAT MAN BELONGS ON A STAGE ALWAYS. 

The protect trans live pin. I’M STILL NOT OVER IT. 

Legit we all got chills halfway through just because it was so special and actually happening and none of us could believe it. Will literally rubbed his arm in the middle of a song and called it out and just ugh.

At one point, he did this little mic catch, looked at Gabe, did it again, and was just so proud of himself.

Mike constantly ragged on Gabe and it was the best.

Mike: “So I blocked an extra hour for Midtown’s soundcheck because Gabe needs it. You think you need 2 hours of vocal warm-ups? I think you do."

“Is it 7:30 yet? I promised Gabe we’d be off by then.”

It legit felt like a performance minus the stopping and adjusting and it was just so relaxed and so happy and I - it was worth everything I paid for and more.

---

(We start the very slow process of waiting to meet the TAI boys and get to see the beginning of Midtown’s soundcheck) 

Meeting them - all of them were so so so so nice and it’s so fucking overwhelming to have all of them right there talking to you at the same time. I was shaking violently and the security guard was trying to calm me down LOL. "Mike's an ass! He's just a dude. They're all just dudes. It's going to be great. Just breathe." Easy for you to say, sir.

They were all very lovely and immediately tried to calm me down but somehow being circled by them all IS NOT CALMING. I thanked Will for wearing the pin and shared what their music/scene has done for me and DIDN'T CRY. so yay. Success. I felt a lil bad because I turned and had started to talk to Will (to thank him) and Carden immediately turned to Sisky to talk amongst themselves before looking surprised that I was addressing/thanking all of them and they were all so fucking sweet. I can't. I love them all so much.

But it was so fucking overwhelming that I nearly walked directly into Gabe who was still soundchecking out on the venue floor almost 2 hours later. You def can’t say he doesn’t care. He legit moved out of my way and I went to stand back in line and the person I was next to was like "....you nearly took out Gabe, you know that?" FML. Sorry, man. I WAS SHOOK. The person who took photos I thought took two but turns out she takes them the whole time so I have 7 photos and all of them are embarrassing. But I'm glad to have 'em.

We got a TAI...tote with a signed lanyard card thing and a sticker of the new logo and the gabilliam poster.

We got sent to wait in another line which ended up being so long we just stayed and they scanned our tickets and we could go in from there after we got our merch. We got to see Jon soundcheck and some people called out Happy Birthday. That fucker started to play Sins just to see us all whip around and laughed. He teased a few other songs bc he's Jon.

--------

Jwalk

He started early and people were still coming in. I felt really bad for him because everyone was talking to the point it was hard to hear him over the chatter. I was getting seriously annoyed because he's got a beautiful voice and his songs are bops and it was really cool to see them live.

"I actually borrowed this acoustic from Siska and it has cobwebs in it."

Someone near me aggressively yelled happy birthday to him again and Jon was all "uh, thank you? Happens every year." And moved on.

He played most of his recent stuff and was so good

—————

MIDTOWN

Gabe crediting tyler with midtown coming back and then my chem:

Gabe - “so mikey called and said can you play some shows?

I said we suck, bro.

And mikey said ‘so practice’

And here we are.

Talked twice about not remembering why he stopped touring until he wakes up the next morning and remembers he’s “an old fart with a bad back”

His kid’s roblox - took a picture /video of the crowd with it. "My 3 year old asked me to bring his roblox with so I don't forget him so I'm taking a picture of it with each crowd, is that okay?"

Tyler immediately: "Yeah, none of that is true. He just bought that."

They were so happy and so grateful and bantering back and forth and just so appreciative.

Played over their time by 2 songs - “We’re out of time? Fuck it. Let's keep going."

“On our last Midtown tour - we toured with the academy is and struck up a friendship that will last forever. Like for real. The type of friendship that continues on even after we’re dead. I love those dudes so much.”

DEDICATED TWO SONGS TO THEM. A Faulty Foundation and No Place Feels Like Home. 

“Whose going to riot fest tomorrow? Sorry. We’re playing the exact same set there tomorrow. Deal with it. We’ve only got so many songs. Forgive us.” 

“The my chem tour - 98.5% of the people there won’t know who we are. Obviously you guys are amazing and do know us but we wanted a song that everyone and maybe even their parents knew and could have a good time with so Tyler had written one once and it’s finally time to play it” - Tyler talked about a writing session that went bad then played When You Were Young. 

They were so good!! Gabe's bass broke halfway through. And two songs before the end he said he'd lost his voice and kinda took a step back vocally

Rough set list:

Become What You Hate

Like A Movie

??? (I forgot what came next) 

Just Rock N Roll

Get It Together

When We Were Young

So Long as We Keep Our Bodies Numb We're Safe

A Faulty Foundation - dedicated to the TAI 

To Our Savior 

No Place Feels Like Home (Also dedicated to TAI…)

Empty Like The Ocean

Give It Up 

————

TAI… absolutely fucking incredible from start to finish. It literally felt like no time had passed at all.

GABE. GABE COMING OUT FOR CLASSIFIEDS  - unplanned. Surprise. Will flustered AF.  MORE HUGS FOR MIKE AND WILL. 

AJ and Mike for Attention - hugs after all around.

SNAKES ON A MOTHERFUCKING PLANE

Will being so bashful and appreciative and stumbling over his words and I cannot with him.

I don’t understand how they’re not a bigger band. 

They’re so fucking amazing.

I have no complaints. Would have changed nothing besides the fact it had to end.

I hope someone gets the setlist together bc I can’t.  (Edit: They did) 

Set List: 

The Phase That Pays

About A Girl 

Slow Down

LAX to O’Hare

Season

Sleeping with Giants (Lifetime)

Classifieds (WITH SURPRISE GABE CAMEO)

Bulls in Brooklyn

Black Mamba

Very 1st Lie (Cover of Material Issue’s song - a local Chicago band active in the 90s) 

Attention w/ AJ and Mike D

Big Mess

Checkmarks

After the Last Midtown Show

Encore: 

Snakes on a Plane

———

Legit, I will never regret having flown out here to do this. I didn't think the Projekt Rev 07 tour could ever be toppled from my fav concert of all time but this did it. I will never forget this.

[hyuckssunchip]

in the mood for art

(pic: 欧亚菲温泉水世界, OYF hot spring world)

Pairings: Renjun x Reader

Words: 1.2K

Warnings: Language (there is almost always language in my writings), fluff

Summary:

As a self proclaiming 'art connoisseur', you are discussing the qualities of a specific painting, yet you soon find yourself in hot water. How will you handle it?

You were grumbling to yourself, as you did when you were forced to attend an event that you didn’t want to.

It wasn’t that art shows were boring to you, or that you hated them. You appreciated art.

Just not this in particular.

“Anyone could make this.” You scoffed at the boy beside you, rolling your eyes as your best friend continued gushing to an unsuspecting man a few feet away.

“You think so?” He answered, face showing a hint of humor.

“Yeah, my six year old nephew has stuff better than this.”

A small grin took over his face, “So he’s the new Picasso huh?”

“No, he’s just better than this stuff.”

“And what makes you so qualified about art?” He cocked his head, suddenly amused and invested in you.

You shot him a look, “Some of the best food critics can’t cook to save their lives.”

“And you think that gives them the right to destroy people’s careers?”

“I never said that. I’m just saying that just because I can’t paint, doesn’t mean that I can’t enjoy it, or not enjoy it.”

“But if you did paint, don’t you think you’d appreciate it more? Understand that it’s not as easy as it looks?”

“But even then, this guy’s gotta have the basics down. All I’m saying is a lot of these art shows showcase work that are just big names. There’s loads of better stuff out there.“

“Hmmm, and do you know this big name?” He asked, returning his gaze to the painting on the wall, the signature on the bottom standing out to him more than ever.

You hesitated, eyes flickering to the name on the panel. Huang Renjun.

Sure you had never heard the name before. But to be fair, names like Picasso, Van Gogh and Claude Monet seemed to stick out a bit more. Not to mentioned you weren’t exactly well versed in the art world, at least of the present day.

At that moment, as if you were saved by the bell, the lights in the room dimmed, a semi-spotlight illuminating the front of the makeshift stage. A older man stood at the front, just behind the podium. It was obvious that he was the curator and you couldn’t help but feel a little distain.

“Welcome everyone, thank you so much for attending and supporting our artists. Today we are privileged to be in the presence of one of the artists themselves. He is here to speak on the behalf of the charity that this function is supporting and funding. So, to speak a bit more on youth access to art and creation, Mr. Huang Renjun everybody!”

You felt yourself nearly choke on the air as the round of the applause filled the room. Suddenly you felt very anxious, glancing around the room to spot the possible artist.

But by the time that you had looked back up towards the podium, the man who you had been talking to earlier was standing behind it.

“Hello everyone, thank you so much for the warm welcome. As most of you know, I’m Huang Renjun and I’m so grateful to be able to speak in front of you about….”

You began to tune out the speaker, as your mind reeled back at all the things you had said to him, about him, to his face. You mentally slapped your forehead hating that you had decided to open your stupid mouth.

You were brought back out of your reverie when the applause started back up. Your eyes were trained on his figure making his way off of the stage. He was greeted by many people on the way, glancing every once in a while in your direction, at which you tried your best to hide from. Eventually he did make his way back to your side with a teasing smile.

At this point you were hiding behind a drink you had snatched off of a server.

“So, did you enjoy the presentation?” He asked, leaning in awfully close and making your face heat up even more than it would have without the proximity.

“P-presentation?” You managed to stutter out, eyes wide against his.

He grinned, pulling back as he placed his hands in his pant’s pockets.

“Oh, presentation! Yes. Yes, I did. It is very nice… of you… to- to do that.” You nodded, taking another long sip as you cursed at the lack of confidence in your voice.

The look on his face intensified, it was as if he was struggling not to laugh at you.

You huffed at the way that he was holding back his smile. “Fine, whatever, laugh at me. But just so you know I don’t want to take it back. I mean if I could go back in time and not do it I would, but I did it and … yeah. I said what I said.”

He nearly doubled over in laughter, wiping a fake tear out of the corner of his eye. “No, it’s alright. I surprisingly enjoyed what you had to say.”

“Renjun!” A voice shouted from across the room, and he was ushered in that direction.

“Well, it was nice- interesting to meet you.” He grinned, smiling at the darkening shade on your cheeks. “And by the way, I’d love to meet that budding Picasso nephew of yours.”

He chuckled, and with one last wave he headed towards the silver haired man who pulled him into a rough hug.

You frowned, still kind of shocked by the way your night was going. “Like to meet my budding Picasso.” You scoffed, muttering to yourself. “How am I supposed to see you again?”

Your mouth fell open slightly, realizing what you just said.

No. No you were not going to. No you did not want to see him again. Why would you? You completely embarrassed yourself tonight. Why would you want to see him again?

But then again, there was something in that smile that you really did want to see again.

“Are you ready to go?” Your friend asked, finally making her way to you and looping her arm in yours.

“Uh…”

“Gosh that was quite the show wasn’t it?” She asked excitedly. “Mr. Huang was so cool too, don’t you think? It’s great what he’s doing, raising awareness and support, plus it really helps that he’s incredibly handsome. I’m half debating coming back tomorrow just to see him again.”

“What?” You asked, turning to face her at her last sentence. “Tomorrow?”

“Don’t worry, I won’t drag you along twice.” She laughed, tugging at you to keep moving.

“He’s going to be here tomorrow too?” You asked, half to yourself, but she picked up on your words.

“Yeah, he’s gonna speak again. Don’t you think he’s so cool? And did you see his eyes? Oh my gosh I could just drown in them. You know, I think he’d be the type to….”

You began to tune out her words, smiling to yourself, thinking that maybe, just maybe you could be free tomorrow night.

And maybe, just maybe, you’d be in the mood for art.

©Copyright 2021. hyuckssunchip. All rights reserved.

[shadlad24]

Tumblr Master Post

(Third Mensiversary)

Hey, guys! So, instead of the usual monthly post, I decided to consolidate everything. From now on, I will update the following list and reblog it every 22nd. Enjoy!

Please note that Tumblr either cannot or will not preserve my formatting. So, I have used Google Docs as well. Please click on this link if you’d prefer that. It’s open to all. Thanks!

My posts are almost XWP-related and can be categorized into eight main categories (The pic below is merely for record-keeping and visualization purposes; scroll down for the actual links):

Questions

Curious— Why does everyone think Gabrielle/Renée O’Connor has green eyes?

A Favor to the God of War?— What in the world was the favor Ares wanted from Gabrielle during “Sacrifice”?

Smoking Gun?— Why did Hope knowing Solan’s name give her away as his killer?

Good Luck, Kid!— Why was security so bad in “Maternal Instincts”?

The Love of Your Love— Wasn’t the second verse of this song frustrating and hurtful to Gabrielle?

The (Many) Problem(s) with Ares— Why does so little about Ares’s character make sense?

Hard Ask— Can I PLEASE get a willing, able, AND reliable beta-reader for my Xena fanfic???

The (Many) Problem(s) with Ares [Reblog]— Three more questions about the god of war

No Way— Is the titular image of “Xena: Warrior Princess” what it seems?

Episode Reflections

Random Thoughts While Watching XWP— funny moments from “A Family Affair,” “Them Bones, Them Bones,” “Married with Fishsticks,” and “Coming Home”

Observations from “Sins of the Past”— fifteen things I noticed while watching the episode for the second time (first after completing the series)

Running Commentary on “A Family Affair”— just what it sounds like XD

Concluding Thoughts on “A Family Affair”— a defense of Hope and Gabrielle

Echoes Across the Years— how Solan’s last conversation with his mother echoed Gabrielle’s first with the warrior princess

Redeeming “Fishsticks,” Part 1— how the adults and themes in Gabrielle’s dreamworld held great significance

Redeeming “Fishsticks,” Part 2— how Crustacea’s monstrous children were re-imaginations of Hope and The Destroyer

Fault— my thoughts on the series finale

Good Luck, Kid! [Reblog]— a fun little extension of the original post showing the impression Gabrielle made on Hope

Original Fanfic Excerpts

The Mother of Hope, a collection of one-shots exploring Gabrielle’s thoughts, feelings, and experiences with/about her daughter

Disparity— Hope’s and Gabrielle’s conversation during the final commercial break of “A Family Affair”

Somewhere— Gabrielle searching Tartarus for Hope while Ares was harassing Xena and Solan in “God Fearing Child”

Super Challenge— the entire Rift Arc summed up in a single conversation, the lines of dialogue coming from each of the twelve Rift episodes of season three

Aperture— Gabrielle’s thoughts the night of her wedding

The Daughter of Duality, Hope’s life story from her perspective

My Great Hope— Seraphin prepares her goddess for childbirth

Hope Rising— Baby Hope makes a terrible mistake

“Tears of a Goddess: Blood Rain,” a one-shot exploring “Motherhood” from the goddess of love’s perspective

Useless— Aphrodite agonizes over what to do when alone with Gabrielle and Eve

Tears of a Goddess, a story in which Aphrodite comes clean about the large part she played in Gabrielle’s life behind the scenes

Gabrielle Rages against Xena— the bard finds herself at Aphrodite’s temple, heartbroken and lost after the series finale

Aphrodite Ribs Gabrielle— Aphrodite complains about Gabrielle’s mishaps throughout the show

Rapprochement, a story about Xena and Gabrielle hashing out The Rift Arc before finally coming together as a couple

The Answer— Xena reminds Gabrielle of who she is

Divine Intervention— Aphrodite blesses Xena and Gabrielle’s union

Adventures in Moving Forward, a chronicle of Aphrodite’s and Gabrielle’s adventures together post-AFIN and all my other XWP stories

Stranger— Aphrodite protects Gabrielle from a mob in Brittania

The Betrayer, Gabrielle's untold experience during “The Deliverer.”

Disturbance— Xena makes an unexpected suggestion on how to stop Gabrielle’s recurring nightmare

Deception— Khrafstar fills multiple voids in Gabrielle’s heart

Defilement— Reality slips away from Gabrielle with the loss of her blood innocence

Desecration— Gabrielle becomes one with darkness

Dissolution— The return of Gabrielle’s hero brings about only more tragedy

Fan Theories

Soul Orbits and Psychic Echoes— how Xena and Gabrielle got their children through equal and opposite people and circumstances

Shazam!— how Xena might be able to come back after the series finale

Man-Killer— what really happened to Toris

An Unsung Hero— Aphrodite being Gabrielle’s guardian angel throughout the Rift Arc

Infamous, Infuriated— why Xena engaged in the GabDrag (and BardBraining)

Solving Some Problems with Ares— answering two of my own questions about the god of war

Odd, Sort of Beautiful Symmetry— how we ended up with Annie and Harry

Soul Orbits and Psychic Echoes [Reblog]— an extension of the original theory that focuses more on Solan and Hope themselves

Solving More Problems with Ares— answering my next questions about the god of war

Episode Cracksubs

The Comedy of Amphipolis— “The Haunting of Amphipolis”

What in the Gurkhan?— “Who’s Gurkhan?”

Them Bones and Boneheads— “Them Bones, Them Bones”

TL;DRs— cliff-notes version of longer posts

TL;DR #1: Soul Orbits and Psychic Echoes

TL;DR #2: Infamous, Infuriated

TL;DR #3: The (Many) Problem(s) with Ares

Funny Little Moments— (Five:) a series highlighting overlooked silly things from each episode, illustrated in pictures and cracksubs / (More:) summation posts showcasing additional funny moments from each episode, in half-season chunks

Five Funny Little Moments #1: “Sins of the Past”

Five Funny Little Moments #2: Chariots of War

Five Funny Little Moments #3: Dreamworker

Five Funny Little Moments #4: Cradle of Hope

Five Funny Little Moments #5: The Path Not Taken

Five Funny Little Moments #6: The Reckoning

Five Funny Little Moments #7: The Titans

Five Funny Little Moments #8: Prometheus 

Five Funny Little Moments #9: Death in Chains 

Five Funny Little Moments #10: Hooves and Harlots

Five Funny Little Moments #11: The Black Wolf

Five Funny Little Moments #12: Beware Greeks Bearing Gifts

Miscellaneous

Golden Ticket— Renee O’Connor’s initial responses to me on Instagram

Bath Time— a fun self-challenge involving making a story from recently downloaded/screenshot images in just a few minutes

Mensiversary— review of my first month on Tumblr

Confirmation/Affirmation— Steven L. Sears’s essay of support for my Furies theory

K.O.— Renée O’Connor liking my comment about ^

Hooray!— The Mother of Hope is finished (kinda)

Aww…— a quick picture post to try something new while I was bummed about the deadly tech bug that obliterated my posts for weeks

Second Mensiversary— review of my second month on Tumblr

NOOO!— a lamentation related to The Mother of Hope

The (Many) Problem(s) with Ares [Reblog/Response]— answering a reader

More Funny Little Moments #1: Season 1, Episodes 1-12

*Other

Black Hole— a poem about depression

It’s Nothing— a poem on invalidation

What the?— the beginning of the bug :(

[eonghwa]

#seonghwa-verse headcanons: amusement park/roller coasters 

a/n: inspired by my little trip yesterday. full credits for rapper hcs go to my lovely friend who always puts up with me and all the shverse shit.

!! the order of the personas for the headcanons is mtl to enjoy rollercoasters

intro + masterlist ː sh personas profiles

 cw: gn!reader. no specific warning

say my name 

him wave and rapper are three for price of one

enjoys all the rides

really loves rollercoasters and has a blast

laugh when on the rides, at times he laughs so hard he almost can't breath

but somehow always looks like he's scared in the pictures 

his goal is going on every single ride of the park 

and you are going with him

he's a kid at heart and he's cute

overall going with him would be so fun

but if you're scared he probably isn't the right amusement park partner

wave

s c r e a m s on EVERY ride just for the sake of it

loves "water coasters" kind of rides

would talk you into wearing a white shirt 

scientific facts mode: on "you know white clothes absorb very little of the sun's heat and keep your body cooler hence why you really should wear this"

"i'm only telling you this because i care about your well-being"

it's only later when you're standing in line that you realize his true intentions

aka your wet white see-through shirt

again if you're scared of rides you don't wanna go with him 

rapper

last one of the golden trio

makes sure you two always go to the front of any roller coasters

backhugs you and moves you to the very front every time

if you try to run away he just tightens his hold on you 

his head on your shoulder trying to get you relaxed

yet amped up for some fun

lowkey cute but i don't know if i trust him

atoz

the one who goes for the most crazy and extravagant ones

definitely not the right partner if you're scared

but unlike the golden trio he wouldn't force you

he would just go without you

and have you waiting for him

would make you choose the next ride tho 

more like he leads you without you noticing to the next fun one he wanna try

making it look like it was your idea to begin with

it is what it is

inception

here for the thrill and the adrenalin rush

LOVES the speed 

doesn't like going alone tho

he always wants his roller coaster train buddy

would also love to go on the ferris wheel

to enjoy the view and your presence

in a slow peaceful mood

fireworks

in the middle, likes roller coasters /a normal amount/

does the ones he liked the most more than once

once in a while he wants to try the scariest one

enjoys a fun day with you

lowkey he's the cheesiest date but don't tell answer

also reminds you of sunscreen if you went on a real hot summer day

would stand in line for hours just for you

buys ALL the pics of you two from every ride

laughs at wonderland

pirate king

not really scared but when it's your turn and you are the next in line he starts getting antsy

as soon as the ride starts he screams his head off

but it's fun and HE is fun

one time he said something along the lines of "mom please save me"

once the rides is over he gets off like nothing happened 

denying he screamed non-stop for the past few minutes 

just loves spending time with you having fun

answer

not really a fan of big roller coasters 

but no one knows if he's actually scared or not

would do some from time to time 

but you won't see him gushing with happiness

would do it for you tho 100%

holds your hand even when you are supposed to hold on tight to the bars

would play some game to win you some stuffed toy animal

the bigger the better

halahala

again not scared of roller coasters but he just doesn't like them

doesn't like that kind of speed while being /blocked/ in a tiny wagon 

doesn't like “sudden” or “rough” movements and some rides do not help with this

gets a bit grumpy but please buy him some strawberry ice cream

and watch him be a smiley baby

HAUNTED HOUSE man

wonderland

has to keep the facade

but he's scared af of roller coasters

good thing he can keep a straight face during the whole ride

but won't do more than one 

his act can last for just one round

then would suggest the slower ones

watch him suggest the carousel 

buys candies for everyone

[deejadabbles]

A Thousand Songs (Atem/Yami x Reader)

Chapter Five: Hello, My Old Heart

One /// Two /// Three /// Four /// Five /// (Six coming soon) ///

Summary: You knew that you and your band could make it big. Not only that, but stay together while doing it; the five of you were family, after all. The only problem was that despite all your musical talents...none of you were particularly good at lyrics. After years of struggling to put out your first full album, the solution finally made himself know in chance meeting on an empty stage.

Rock Band AU, Atem x Reader, gender neutral reader.

You could visibly see the poor young man swallowing hard as he settled in the seat across from you and the rest of your bandmates. Try as you might to make the setting casual (cushy chairs instead of a desk, offers of soda and chips, greeting him with an ‘what’s up, my dude?’, etc.) Atem still seemed rather nervous. Not that you blamed him, you distinctly remember Honda making a joke about “oh yeah, ask the dude to come to our secluded studio by himself to meet five strangers, that’s not creepy or anything” when Yugi told you guys how he had invited the man to meet with the rest of you.

“So, Yugi said that you write songs as a hobby?” Anzu began, giving him the warmest smile she could, an effort to ease Atem’s mood.

He nodded, then started unclasping the latch on his leather messenger bag, “That’s right, I’ll admit, I don’t have too many that are finished, but that’s mostly due to boredom and moving on to a new idea, not lack of inspiration.” He then pulled out some papers divided by paperclips. “Here are the songs I think best represent my usual work, the work that’s easiest for me to write as well as what I would prefer to put out there.”

Honda grabbed the small stack and passed out songs to each of you. A bit of an awkward silence fell as you all started reading the various lyrics, but not even that could tarnish how impressed you were with the ones you were reading. Poetic, but not too over the top or pretentious, nice. You glanced up at the others, nodding your head with an impressed smile before switching papers with Yugi to look over another example (you also didn’t miss the way Yugi beamed at you). Now this song struck you, after only reading the first verse you could already hear the beginnings of a beat and chords you could put with the lyrics.

“Yugi also said you have a killer voice,” you said, shifting your eyes from the page to peer up at him.

He gave a cute little cough, “Uh, yes, I suppose I’m not a bad singer.”

You had to actively keep your mind from gushing over how sweet he was. The dude looked like a typical adonis hottie, but his shy outer demeanor just added an extra layer to him. He was wearing something more stylish than the few tabloid pics you’d seen: a long-sleeved black shirt with a silky maroon and gold vest, accessorized with a few rings, bangles, necklaces, and a pair of gold dangling earrings.

You shook the wandering thoughts on his attractiveness away; this was for business, not pleasure. “I was just wondering if you’d mind singing one of the songs for us, that way we can get a feel for the melody you had in mind.”

Again, Atem seemed to swallow something in this throat as a hand reached up to briefly play with one of the flat triangles dripping from his ears. “I suppose I could do that, but, do you mind if I play my violin with it? I’ll find it easier to sing with some music.”

“Of course,” you waved an eager hand, egging him on before handing him back the music sheet in your hand.

His eyes scanned the pages, reminding himself of what song it was before nodding his head and reaching down to the instrument case beside the armchair. Jonouchi had made a comment about Atem carrying his violin everywhere, trying to set a joking mood, but it just caused a flushed Atem to mumble about how he had just picked it up from getting its weekly tuning.

Once Atem was standing, violin in hand, he took a deep breath to collect himself. Then, after two slow heartbeats, he began to play.

The first note was a sorrowful one, long, like a quiet, mournful hum, his slender fingers pulsing to create a wave effect on the sound. Then he was singing. His tone came out like a deep, almost breathy moan, letting the lyrics flow like a story at first- before his tone rose and belted out the chorus.

Atem was captivating, pulling you in with every line, every inflection, making you want to hold your breath lest the sound of it distract from the song. He kept his eyes closed, lost in the music his hands and mouth crafted, and the longer the song went on the more he seemed to relax, to lean into his own notes.

You blinked suddenly, realizing that your mouth had been hanging open just in time to close it before Atem ended his performance on another soaring note and breathy lyric. He stayed like that for a moment, catching his breath, basking in the lingering sound of his song.

Finally, his eyes blinked open and shifted to gauge everyone’s reaction. You weren’t the only one left in awe.

“Holy shit,” Honda breathed.

Yugi’s beaming smile was at maximum sunshine as he leaned into you and whispered, “That’s the song I heard him sing at the theatre, isn’t it beautiful?!”

You nodded and opened your mouth to say something but Anzu beat you to it.

“Can you do that again?” she asked, eager, as she jumped up and walked to her keyboard.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” you asked, also bouncing to your feet and joining her.

Anzu smiled back at you, “Keeping that longer intro and adding keys to it?”

“Yes!” you turned to Jonouchi- who was still staring at Atem like he didn’t quite believe the man was standing there. “Jou, add some drums? Something steady and subtle at first, drawing everyone in before the lyrics start and-”

“-and picking up when the chorus kicks in?” he finished, snapping to attention in an instant, “You got it!”

With that Jonouchi vaulted off the back of the couch, plopping onto the stool at his drum set. Atem was still standing there, now looking a bit bewildered and amused as he watched everyone get to work, perhaps some pride shining in his eyes that his music had inspired it.

“Atem?” you asked, tone gentle and drawing his attention back to you, “Can you play that again?” you repeated Anzu’s question, seeing as how she was fully engrossed in her keys now.

Again, the man seemed hesitant, “Shouldn’t you be taking over, you’re the lead singer after all.”

“Dude, we have to keep that violin track,” you insisted, finding your voice breathy as you pointed at Atem, “It’s perfect for the song, it’s deep and beautiful and-” speechless, you gave an exaggerated chef’s kiss to emphasize just how much you meant what you were touting.

The expression earned you a smile from the violinist, a hint of bashfulness mixing with the fresh and rising pride. “Alright, if you think it will improve the song.” With that, Atem lifted his violin, took another deep breath, and started the song again.

***

It was strange how no hands had officially shaken, no one even told Atem he was hired, but that session was immediately followed up by the band asking when his next free day was and asking him to come back for another practice session. Atem had never intended on actually playing with the band, but, when they acted so enthralled with his playing, he could hardly say no.

The next time they got together (almost a week after their first meeting) Atem found himself just as nervous as when he first met them. Parking outside their studio, he found his chest heating up with some anxiety. Atem never was good around people, after all.

Hello, my old heart

How have you been?

Are you still there inside my chest?

He rubbed his hands against the steering wheel, letting out a long breath and holding it a moment, before making himself grab his violin case and climb out of the car. His feet crunching on the gravel driveway grounded him a bit and he had managed to calm down slightly before knocking on the studio door.

I've been so worried, you've been so still

Barely beating at all

He heard the sound of laughter coming closer on the other side of the door and a moment later it opened, revealing you in the doorway and more laughter echoing yours in the next room.

“Atem, there you are! Come on in,” you stepped aside and waved an inviting arm.

Atem felt the heat in his chest climb up his neck, “Sorry, am I late?”

“Huh?” You then waved your hand again as you shut the door behind him, “Oh no don’t worry, we just got here early, that’s all.”

He heard someone else call his name before he even got to the room where everyone was sitting, and by the time he did enter, the whole band was waving and greeting him. He cleared his throat before nodding back to everyone and saying a weak ‘hello’ before you spoke again.

“Come on, sit down and chill for a bit before we get started,” you waved at a beat-up arm chair even as you perched on its armrest.

Atem realized with a quick look around that there was nowhere better for you to sit and you were likely offering him your own seat. “Oh, that’s alright, I don’t want to steal your seat-”

Before his offer to sit on the floor was out, you shook your head, “Dude, we can’t have our muse sitting in a creaky fold-up chair, at least sit on the other arm so I don’t topple it!” You laughed again as Honda made some comment about how a topple would probably bust the thing in half.

His cheeks were hot now, but he took the offer with grace (or at least, as much grace as he could muster) and perched himself on the other armrest, setting his violin on the actual seat. Atem also remembered how last time, he had been offered the armchair while Anzu took the creaky fold-up chair. Everyone here really seemed to care about making him comfortable.

Hello, my old heart

It's been so long

Since I've given you away

When was the last time he met anyone who had greeted him with such...openness? Such compassion. And a whole group of someones at that...

He cleared his throat again, trying to draw himself out of his wandering thoughts. “So, are we just going to work out more of the music today?”

And every day, I add another stone

To the walls I built around you

To keep you safe

Everyone seemed to respect his want to get down to business, perhaps thinking that he had other engagements, and only chit-chatted for a handful of minutes, before getting down to their rehearsal. It went well, just as the previous session had, and Atem found himself in awe of how well the creative process of making notes together flowed. Just like that first day, everyone seemed to work off of each other so well, bounding ideas left and right, almost always being on the same page. Even when they weren’t, there were just a few goodhearted jabs and sighs before working everything out.

Again Atem found himself shaking his thoughts away. He really should stop, it wasn’t wise to get attached to this process, these sessions, these people. After all, he was just their ghostwriter, nothing more.

Oh, don't leave me here alone

Don't tell me that we've grown

For having loved a little while

He found himself smiling again despite himself, when you started throwing popcorn kernels at Jonouchi; retribution for a comment about how you needed to change the chords up in the third chorus.

“I’m not changing it,” you said with your tongue sticking out, all while Jou looked affronted at your kernel bombing. “It’s a steady beat, that’s the whole point! Right, Atem?”

At the sound of his name, Atem’s eyes went wide, “Uh- What?”

“Eh, don’t drag him to your side!” Jonouchi pouted, tossing some popcorn from his lap back in your direction.

“I’m not dragging, I’m asking his opinion, there’s a difference,” you said matter of factly, then turned back to Atem, who was sweating a bit now, “What do you think, Atem? Are the same chords during the third chorus too boring? Or does it fit the subtle, powerful nature of the song?”

“You’re leading his answer!” Jonouchi countered, again looking appalled, then squawking as you tossed more popcorn at him.

Atem was a bit distracted by the way Honda kept laughing as Jou picked kernels out of his shirt, but eventually he managed to swallow thickly and answer your question. “I actually like the way you have it now, if I’m being honest.”

You beamed at him, stuck your tongue out at Jonouchi in victory, then held the popcorn bowl out to Atem. “Thank you, my muse! Here, have some brain food.”

His face was heating up again at nickname- or, dare he say, endearment? However, even as he blushed, and took a handful of popcorn, he couldn’t keep that smile from making yet another appearance.

Oh, I don't wanna be alone

I wanna find a home

And I wanna share it with you

When everyone called the day's session to an end, Atem tried not to feel...disappointed. Stop that , he told himself again, this was not something to get attached to. As everyone packed their notes away, Honda started asking about dinner.

“Heeey if I give you a ride to work, think you can get me a discount on nachos again?” he asked, turning to you with an eyebrow wiggle.

You scoffed, “Dude, the boss was barely okay with that one time I did it, I can’t convince her again. But I can just buy your nachos if you really want.”

“Where do you work?” Atem found himself asking, far too late to stop himself from getting involved.

“Oh- ever heard of The Mark? It’s a bar downtown.”

Atem shook his head, feeling a bit embarrassed. Admittedly, the only bar he had been in since college was the high-end one in his apartment building.

You didn’t seem to take notice of his embarrassment though and just shrugged, “It’s only popular to a certain crowd. Anyway,” you continued, turning back to Honda, “give me a ride and I’ll buy you nachos.”

“Okay, all this talk of nachos has me hungry,” Jonouchi groaned, “Let’s go with em, Yug.”

Anzu perked up at that, nodding to you as she said, “You know, I’ve really been craving your specialty daiquiris. Jou, got room in your truck for me?”

“Sure,” the drummer shrugged as everyone started milling towards the door.

Yugi was smiling brightly as he held the door open for everyone, “Guess it’s a band outing now! Atem, you want to join? You can follow us to the bar, it isn’t far.”

As his feet were once again crunching on the gravel drive, Atem had to stop. He looked back to the group, ready to see at least one of them giving an uneasy expression at the invitation, if not an outright protest.

Instead, he saw Anzu nodding her head eagerly while Honda locked up the studio. Neither you nor Jonouchi looked wary of the suggestion and instead just looked to him for an answer.

You must have thought he needed further prompting, because you said, “Hey, our ‘girls night’ plate of nachos is more than big enough for all of you.”

Atem had to swallow another something in his throat. All of you were already inviting him out for drinks?

Hello, my old heart

How have you been?

“I- sorry, I have to get up early in the morning. Thank you, though.” Atem could only cast his eyes to the ground during the half-lie.

How is it being locked away?

He saw something flicker in Yugi’s eyes, but he was quick to hide it with a smile. “Okay, maybe next time.”

Your smile matched Yugi’s as everyone headed to Jou’s truck and Honda’s bike, “Have a good night, Atem.”

Don't you worry, in there you're safe

“See you next week,” Anzu waved.

All he could manage was a nod as he turned towards his own car.

And it's true, you'll never beat

But you'll never break

It only took one more session to get the rest of the music figured out, and then it was time to record. Atem was interested in the process, how the five of you set up the sound equipment, what programs you used, he even asked you how you had installed padding to improve the sound quality.

The video part of the recording would be left for later, right now it was just the song to worry about- though you did make a point to tell Atem that you wanted to discuss setting ideas for the video soon. Atem felt his heart swell a bit at that. Not that he wanted to admit it, but he was glad that you wanted to involve him in every step of the song. This song in particular, this first one that had so enthralled Yugi first, was likely one of the more personal ones Atem had written.

Your voice rose with the chorus, fingers dancing gracefully against the bridge of the guitar, and Atem found himself admiring how well suited your voice was to his lyrics. A perfect fit. Though you likely had no way of knowing the background behind this song or why Atem had written it, you belted the lyrics with passion and depth, cared for every bar as if you were singing from the depths of your heart.

Maybe you were. Music spoke to more than just those who wrote it, perhaps not in the same ways, but that hardly mattered.

He heard the way the ending lyric stole your breath, and his violin hummed its final note with you in a harmony Atem had admired a dozen times during these rehearsals. When the last note ended, everyone waited a moment, seeming to hold their breaths, before daring to move. When everyone did, Jonouchi was already bounding over to the computer hooked up to the recording mics. With a few clicks and a quick look over something on the screen, the blonde gave a clap of his hands.

“We got it! That should be all we need for a high quality recording.”

Everyone cheered or hooted at that, and Yugi made a comment about finally having something new to give their fans. Atem was smiling with the rest of them, but he was failing to ignore the way his chest ached just a bit. The song was done, and, unless they asked him to join them on stage, Atem supposed this was the last time he would play with the band.

Writing songs for them was all nice in of itself, but, despite all his personal warnings not to, he would be lying if he said he hadn’t grown a bit attached to these evenings and nights with the band.

Oh, I don't wanna be alone

I wanna find a home

And I wanna share it with you

A sudden call of his name had Atem jolting back to the present, and he saw you standing beside him, a hint of concern creasing your brow. “Everything okay?”

“Uh-” he cleared his throat, “-yes, I’m alright,” he lied, just as he had lied to deny himself the after-work drinks weeks ago. “I was just thinking, we got so caught up in recording this song, that none of you got the chance to discuss if any others were to your liking.”

“What, any of your other songs?” Honda asked, and when Atem nodded, he literally waved the comment off, “Dude, I’m pretty sure we liked all the examples you gave us, right guys?”

“Definitely!” Yugi didn’t miss the chance to boost Atem’s ego (or rather, soothe any worries). “We actually looked over your other songs the other day, and all of us agree we want to record all of them. I told you you were a perfect fit for us!”

The words, as well as the wink Yugi gave, did make Atem smile, but it didn’t do much to alleviate the root of his woe. “I’m glad they fit with the band so well. If you want to know the melodies or themes I had in mind for any of the other songs as well, please don’t hesitate to ask.”

That seemed to give everyone pause.

Nothing lasts forever

Atem watched as they began giving each other looks, very pointed looks, in turns, and he couldn’t ignore the sinking sensation in his chest. They seemed to silently agree on something a moment later, because Anzu spoke up as her eyes turned back to Atem.

“Actually, we were talking about that a lot too…”

Some things aren't meant to be

Atem swallowed hard, heart starting to pound in his ears. Perhaps he wasn’t good enough, perhaps they thought him too pretentious, or maybe he had overstepped the boundaries of his role here, maybe he and his violin didn’t-

“How would you feel about joining the band for the whole album?”

But you'll never find the answers

Until you set your old heart free

Again, your voice put a break on Atem’s reeling thoughts, and he had to blink to collect himself again. “I- you mean, you want me to play for the other songs as well?”

More looks were exchanged, quick ones this time, before Yugi chimed in next. “We talked it over a lot the past week and we all agree that you gel with us pretty well! And not only that, but your violin really adds a lot to our music, we’d really love for you to record more songs with us, not just write them.”

Until you set your old heart free

Now Atem’s heart was pounding in his ears for a whole other reason. He almost wanted to smack himself when he felt the widest, most giddy grin he ever remembered smiling spread across his face.

“I would like that very much,” he said, cheeks going a bit warm when everyone was returning his smile.

Hello, my old heart

“So what are we waitin’ for?” Jonouchi jumped in, all enthusiasm and eagerness, “What song are we doing next?”

That sparked conversation, and everyone started chiming in with their votes almost immediately, Yugi and Anzu even digging out Atem’s sheet music for references. Atem could only take the scene in with a smile that was widening the more he watched them bicker good-heartedly.

And he was glad he had gotten attached to this process, these sessions, to these people.

I wanna share it with you

[nanasarea]

Lee Jeno as your idol bf

Genre: fluff

Pairing: jeno x idol!reader

Prompt: Jeno and you being the cutest duo

Request: Can i request maybe Jeno as your idol boyfriend?

Word count: 1348

Haechan /  Yuta / Mark /  Jaemin / Chenle / Renjun / Jisung / Jaehyun

you were a new sm rookie

so you saw each other a lot

but you never actually interacted

he had his busy schedule

and you spent most of your time practicing

but you whenever you saw him

your heart went boom

we got that boom boom boom boom boom 

but his does too

he was the mc when you debuted

he stood next to you when he introduced your group

yeeun was on the other side

and he had to give you some flowers

yeeun gave your band mate some too

but that didn’t stop him from blushing 

the dreamies teased him so much

he replays the video on youtube

like 25 times

fast forward to promotions

you go on a variety show 

it’s an sm special

so a few members from nct, your group, red velvet, so on

and the mc asks you for your ideal types

jeno gets shy instantly

“are you shy because she’s here?” - renjun

*cue to Renjun’s funeral*

he just smiles 

while mentally punching Renjun

but it’s okay 

because he physically punches Haechan when he said

“bro, you’ve had this crush since she was a rookie, man up.”

at least you don’t know it’s you, right?

haha wrong

Haechan is there what do you expect

he accidentally says you name when he explains Jeno’s crush

RIP Renhyuck when they get back to the dorms

mainly hyuck tho

your members tease you for it too 

because they know you have the biggest crush on him

“Jeno, it’s okay, y/n has a crush on you t-”

you end up putting your hand over their mouth a little too late

you know how irene is like almost everyone under sm’s mom?

she ends up setting you up 

“ah, young love.” 

“irene-noona, you’re acting like you’re 50″ -jeno

“shush, child.” -irene

you stay after practice to work on your dance

just so happens that jeno also planned to practice then

so you end up showing off to each other

and flirting

very shy flirting 

because he gets flustered when either of you say anything

or do anything

he gets so red when you bring up the variety show

you end up just sitting on the floor

and talking the whole night

yes, the whole night

mark walks in to start practice

“I didn’t know anyone was going to be here this early.”

“early?”

“it’s 7am?”

cue looking at each other and getting flustered

thankfully mark came for 127 practice

yours don’t start until 3

and Jeno’s doesn’t start till 6

so you end up getting some coffee 

at this point, you’ve spent 12 hours together

but neither of you are ready to say goodbye

sure, you ran out of things to say

but was that going to stop either of you?

hahahahaha no

you end up going back to your dorms for lunch time

because both of your members were worried

and you hadn’t showered last night

and you had practice

so by this point, you needed one

but before going your separate ways

he gets your number

obviously

and you give it to him

obviously

you haven’t even been seeing each other for 3 weeks

but the fans know

the fans know everything

with like almost no proof

you go out and invite some friends to avoid a dating scandal?

they see right through it

even with hats, sunglasses and masks?

they recognize based on your height

so sm’s like “yes, they are dating, now shut the fuck up”

fans: we been knew tho

ok so remember when

chenle: jaemin mom, jeno dad

well

congrats, you’ve just adopted a whole group of chaotic crackhead

not that you mind

you love them

jisung even starts calling you his parent

casually

jaemin is like highkey annoyed

first you steal his boyfriend, now his son?

but it’s okay

because you also steal his heart

believe it or not, he’s your number 1# shipper

you were shocked but not surprised

bc like you two do be cute

going on vlive together like all the time

mainly voice only

bc “babe, i have no makeup on.”

“jeno, literally stfu, you look perfect”

“aww, babe.”

renjun throwing up in the bg

i’m not saying he would want to match 

but he would lowkey want to match

you’d end up asking jaemin to take like 879 pictures

jaemin lowkey loves it

but he still complains

you have to buy him coffee for his hard work

your ig account being filled with cute pics like

“ootd w/ babe”

you mention jsmr to him once

and he starts doing them again

even features you on one of them

he just stares at you the whole time

did you actually do a good job with the asmr?

do you think he cares?

you’re cute, 

he’s whipped,

you could scream into the mic and he’d be like

“omg, that was amazing”

whipped jeno whipped jeno whipped jeno whipped jeno whipped jeno

oh and 

did i mention whipped jeno?

your comeback teaser came out like 3 seconds ago?

he’s already watched it 5 times

screenshots every frame with you in it

fanboys

then proceeds to fanboy to you

“bABE YOU LOOK TOO GOOD, YOU’RE PAYING FOR MY MEDICAL BILL BC I JUST HAD A HEART ATTACK”

daily snaps from him when you both have schedules

sometimes even from hyuck teasing him

sends a photo of jeno on his phone

with a picture of you in a thought bubble over his head

“y/n, we love you, but we need to be on stage in 2 minutes and he’s still on his phone talking to you. stop.”

so he might have bought your album like 34 times

he didn’t get your photocard

and he was going to get your photocard

sure, he could have just bought the photocard somewhere on ebay

but no, he wanted to get it in the album

he finally does and sends you a snap 

posing with the card 

40 albums in the bg

“finally got yours, babe :) “

he’s too precious

you end up rapping his verse once on tv

he has the video saved on his phone

watches it before bed

and when he wakes up

“renjun, look at this one fancam, i can’t”

“damn”

“huang rENJUN, THAT IS MINE”

jealous jeno? 

jealous jeno

he respects you and knows you’re only his

but he still gets a tiny bit jealous when you interact with other idols

hears a new rookie group member say you’re his idol type

“nOPE, BUDDY, THAT’S MY LINE”

reassuring him that he’s your one and only

you come to his concert

you sit with his 127 and wayv members

you’re expecting a cute family friendly concert

until he starts making dream show

a strip show

doyoung’s just like

“so, my son is grounded now”

johnny just nudges you and smirks

you end up blushing 

like a lot

he has a secret fan account

and so do you but shhh he doesnt know 

ends up liking a tweet on his main account

by accident

and now everyone knows

you tease him

the dreamies tease him

doyoung scolds him

and then teases him

back to him being an mc

you just had a comeback

and he secretly holds your hand behind your backs

but it’s not secretly

because everyone sees

and it’s okay

bc it’s cute af

you end up doing an sm station together

you wrote the song together

about each other

so you spend a lot of time in the studio

messing around

you try and write some lyrics

but get distracted by him playing guitar

you just stare at him

and he gets so shy when he notices

the mv is filled with cute videos of you two

there’s this one scene where he does something very cheesy

and renhyuck end up recreating it

to tease you two

but you don’t care

you’re too whipped for each other 

to sum it up: your most frequent view is his eye smile and you’re not even mad, because you’re just as whipped for him as he is for you

hi, i love jeno 🥺

[animatedminds]

Pixar’s Soul: Review and Reaction

The first sentence I’ve always used to describe Pete Docter and Pixar’s Soul since watching it has nothing to do with the plot. It’s instead is a starstruck comment about the music: the movie begins with a cover of a Duke Ellington classic - Mercer Ellington’s “Things Ain’t What they Used to Be.” It ends with a jazz rendition of a classic from several decades later - but still quite a bit in our past - Curtis Mayfield’s soul classic “It’s Alright.” On a personal level, this would say way more about Soul that most other descriptions of it might to get me to watch it - were I not the kind of person who was absolutely intent on watching the movie day one regardless. Though I am myself a few generations after either of those artists were around, their music has been a part of my life since I was a kid and are essential on any playlist in my opinion. Curtis Mayfield’s music, especially, deserves all the love in the world, and hearing by surprise someone cover his work in a Disney movie made my entire day - and it would have, even if the film weren’t the meaningful ride it is.

But before we get into all that, lets also look at those songs. “Things Aren’t What They Used To Be” is played a la a teacher and a higher school band class: the students are learning and a bit difficult to listen to, while the music-loving teacher cringes at the front. But the choice of song tells us a lot. It’s a jazz standard: which means when it comes to jazz, it’s one of the essentials - a tune every band learns to play, and every jazz fan has heard before. The teacher is a jazzman - you can probably guess who - and the whole time he’s listening to the song you can hear him wanting to sit down and make it sound as perfectly as he hears it in his head. Remember that analogy. Heck, when you watch or rewatch the movie, remember the mindset Joe - because that’s who that teacher is, Joe Gardner, is in for that whole teaching scene in the first place: and remember how important the desire to make things perfect is to the greater story the movie is trying to tell.

“Things Aren’t The Way They Used To Be,” indeed. By the end, you have to wonder: isn’t that the point? Now the second song. “It’s All Right” is a smooth number for dancing to - not frenetic and wild dancing, but more a slow jam sort of vibe. BUt it’s the lyrics that are the most befitting the themes of the movie. Like several of Curtis Mayfield’s tunes “It’s All Right” is an ear worm of an R&B number that’s actually about being a peace with yourself. “You’ve got soul” - ha, I get it - “and everybody knows, that it’s all right.” Or, to quote instead my favorite verse of the song (I did say Mayfield was one of my favorites): “when you wake up early in the morning feeling sad like so many of us do, hum a little soul, make life your goal, and surely something’s gonna come to you.” This is before the spoilery part of the review, but they could not have picked a better song for the movie’s themes if they wrote it themselves.

Soul, after all, is ultimately a movie about how the things we do, the things we love, even the things that define us and should make us feel good in and of themselves, can become a shackle that prevents us from feeling the things that we adopt them to feel. Dreams - especially dreams deferred - can consume us rather than uplift us, and sometimes in pursuing them we may forget to live, and forget that others are living in this world and dreaming alongside us.

This, as you might be able to tell from the way I’ve described it, is a movie with a very strong, and most importantly very well related message that - as we’ve come to expect from Pixar’s output at this point - touches us in our jaded adult hearts. As a creative person with lofty dreams who has almost literally been where the protagonist is in this film - and as many in my generation also have gone through - it definitely feels like a film that was directed straight at the generation that first watched Toy Story as kids decades ago, and now feel somewhat unfulfilled as adults going into the world. Same as Inside Out (a movie specifically designed to make adults cry, in my opinion), the SparkShorts and arguably Onward (I definitely related to Bailey, some). So much like my review of Jingle Jangle, you have something of an idea where this review is going to go before the jump, but that’s okay. This movie did have ups and downs, but its just the kind of up Pixar is good at: they know they’re audience, and especially did for this gem. By the end, it can definitely make you feel as though you too can make it through, as long as you have a little Soul. However, it is not just the message, but the nuances and skill in which they relate that message (and they do come close to making decisions that could have ruined it, at times), which means it’s very difficult for me to put why this movie works into a review without SPOILERS. If you want to avoid SPOILERS, don’t hop over the pic and instead treat the above as your non-SPOILER review.

Soul is the story of one Joe Gardner, played by Jamie Foxx a brilliant early middle-aged pianist with lifelong dreams of becoming a jazz musician, who we first meet teaching part time band at a local high school. The inciting incident is an interesting choice: Joe gets a major offer - he can come on as a full time teacher, making his occupation a career! But Joe believes very much in the adage that “those who cannot do, teach” - in the sense that he wants to do. He cannot accept the position - over the advice of his mother - because that would mean giving up on his dream of being out there playing music for a living: a dream that has consumed him his entire life but which has given him nothing in return. Until now. While agonizing over the decision to take the position, Joe's life then gets a big twist: a former student of his, remembering him fondly years after they knew each other, has a hook for him to join the band of a famous jazz singer and saxophonist - played by Angela Basset (side note, here: jazz has long had a reputation for being something of a boys club, especially for certain instruments, and the choice to have the lead saxophonist and famous idol whose band Joe wants to join be a woman is a great choice that my entire jazz-loving and living family took note of). Joe is instantly elated - he rushes over and naturally aces the audition for the part in the band, and so is on cloud nine...

Until he dies. That’s when the plot really starts. Joe falls down a manhole like an astronomer in an aesop fable, and is now stuck on the slow escalator to The Great Beyond. Naturally, he’s not for that and tries to escape - pursued by overeager spiritual soul-accountant Terry - ending up in the Great Before instead, and leaving his body in a still-living coma (the implications that coma patients in general are people who are choosing not to die when they’re “supposed” to is something I’m sure the writers didn’t intend, so I’ll let it slide). There, Joe is pressganged into mentoring a pre-prepared soul for birth, helping them find their Spark for life - which Joe interprets as the one true purpose and dream they are meant to fulfill. Once he gets them their Spark, he will be able to steal a badge his mentee earns as fully fledged souls and . Luckily for his intended very morally suspect intent on spiritual larceny, he ends up with Soul #22 - and that’s #22 out of hundreds of billions - a soul who has simply never found a Spark despite having been in the Great Before for thousands of years. #22 doesn’t want to live, so she agrees to give him her patch when they’re done. But no mentor before has been able to inspire her (well, technically #22 is genderless, as she demonstrates in the story at Joe’s request, but she is voiced by Tina Fey), so how can Joe? When that proves to be too hard indeed, #22 instead decides to help Joe get back - mostly because she’s intrigued at why anyone would want to cling to life so badly - with the help of some mystics who astral project while in the Zone: where everyone goes when they’re fully immersed in what they do. This almost works, but at the last second everything goes awry: #22 gets mixed up with Joe when he returns, and so he doesn’t quite get back the way he wants to...

That’s enough plot summary for now. That’s all just the set-up anyway, for the choices in writing and concept that I’m about to talk about. As you might have been able to tell from that ominous last note, the middle chunk of Soul - almost right up until the climax, in fact - is actually a body-swap movie, a la Freaky Friday. #22 ends up in Joe’s body, so he has to get her to do the things he needs to get ready for his gig and get through the day while they wait for the mystic to bring a way to set everything right. And did I mention he’s in the body of a cat? Having been following the movie, this wasn’t entirely a surprise, but it was still not something I was entirely ready for coming in. I tend to shy away from that kind of story on a personal level, as body-swap narratives are nearly predominantly based on cringe moments and awkward misconceptions - and that sort of thing usually tends to make me want to leave the scene in question and get a cup of water until after the awkwardness passes. However, this isn’t really part of the review in the sense that I perceive that the movie being in that genre is a flaw - because ultimately that’s just an aspect of my personal taste. Rather, I use it to show just how strong a movie Soul was and how well its narrative choices resonated with its themes that ultimately while it did indeed partake in your typical body-swap narrative cringe moments - “look, the [redacted] in Joe’s body just ran into his boss / mom!” / “look, the [redacted] is having a bizarre conversation with Joe’s friends!” / etc - those moments actually add to the narrative rather than take you out of it. Joe as “friends,” as exemplified by the barber he goes to to get his hair ready for the gig when it inevitably gets ruined in a bout of hijinks (the barber being that extremely well-designed bearded character the internet went wild over). He goes to that barber all the time, talks with him constantly, and believes he knows him well. But it turns out that Joe’s so wrapped up in his wants and desires that he’s never even asked him about his life - he just assumed that the barber was like him, born to do that one thing he was good at. It takes #22′s innocent, slightly off-kilter and occasional philosophical questions about what the heck all this “life” stuff is about for Joe to learn that this person in his life didn’t even want to be where he ended up initially, he ended up there because that’s the way his life turned, but he loves it because it’s life and he appreciates the world he’s come to create around himself. Likewise, he runs into his mom, but while Joe has come to expect his mother to be dismissive of him and his dreams, it takes an accident with #22 for him to realize that he’s been so caught up in his desires and her in her preconceptions that neither of them have ever had a real talk about their relationship, nor given a chance to grow in each other’s eyes. You might notice a trend. One of Joe’s students - a brilliant trombonist - comes to tell him she’s quitting band, but she doesn’t really. She’s just insecure because the other students make fun of her. Joe knows this already - it’s become commonplace to him - so the doesn’t feel the need to do anything about it and instead focuses on his own needs. But #22 decides to talk to her on a whim, and this push and pull of insecurity but joy in what one is good at fascinates her, while it bores Joe. While - like any other New Yorker - public transit is a chore to Joe, the melting pot of people and music draws #22 in: best evidenced by the moment where Joe and #22 meet another great musician playing for tips in the subway. Joe, despite being capable of relating as a musician, just walks past him after appreciating the sound for a sec, while #22, entranced by the things people do, leaves something for him. The world is drab and lacking in vibrancy from Joe’s point of view, as evidenced by the very accurate grimy look of the high school he work at - but from #22′s seemingly jaded eyes seeing it for the first time, it’s full of wonder.

This actually creates an interesting character contrast on top of the one we already know: Joe is the idealist, and #22 is the cynic... right? Well, it turns out Joe doesn’t have much of an appreciation for the world around him - not intentionally, but still to a very strong degree - whereas #22 simply hasn’t had the chance to experience life yet and thus never knew what it was that made people want to be part of it. Life itself becomes her Spark, though neither of them realize it at the time. Lets just get the aesop out of the way now. Your dream is not your life: that’s what Soul wants to say. Things that compel you as a person may consume you, even embitter you, and prevent you from seeing the world around you for what it is. But that doesn’t make dreams a bad thing: people everywhere find that Spark from the dreams to keep moving forward - it’s just that it shouldn’t preclude living, nor should living preclude your dreams. Life is a delicate balance, and man is this movie serving up some complicated life lessons here. I immediately took this as a far more mature take on the message The Princess and the Frog stumbled somewhat through years ago (man, I’m turning out to be pretty hard on that movie in this blog). My biggest issue with PATF is that it tells us that Tiana should be less intent on her dream and find love instead, but doesn’t show us. It’s just characters chiding her for not settling down until the plot ultimately pushes a man in front of her and she realizes she should’ve been finding one all along. That’s a very harsh way of putting it, but it condenses what I’m trying to say: ultimately PATF pushes Tiana to realizations she doesn’t seem to need, whereas Soul has a similar message about life and does so by focusing on character development, about how the protagonist doesn’t have as firm a handle on his life as he thought, and thus brings us a take on the lesson that’s far less cut and dry.

If you’re a fan of The Incredibles, the comparison to Mr. Incredible is fairly easy. Joe, though well meaning and decent overall, is a very self-centered person who happens to be so for very sympathetic and relatable reasons. He just wants to do the thing he feels he was born to. He'll do anything to get back to life and do that thing, even for a single night. He’s consumed by this desire so much that he's oblivious to the people around him, unable to connect to the people he loves, and unable to find joy in anything but his dream. And man, as a young writer who knows in their heart of hearts they can do great things and feels pain at the idea of not doing so, that hits different let me tell you.

The lessons Joe learns from #22 even stick. It turns out that part of what caused Joe’s dream to fail all those time was because of that lack of connection with life. He never presented himself in a way that got people to take notice of him, he never pushed for that position he wanted even though people said no, he never made himself and his life so vibrant that he glowed in the eyes of others (and again, that hits different). That’s maybe the most simplistic message of the bunch, but as a person in the creative field it’s true that sometimes being the smartest person in the room isn’t enough: it’s making himself shine that ultimately clinches Joe the gig even after he almost lost it thanks to the day’s shenanigans.

But in the end, it doesn’t feel like he thought he would.

Remember when I said there are parts where the movie comes perilously close to kiboshing its message? That moment is one, it’s the one. Not that that moment is bad - far from it, it’s the best moment in the entire movie (and you can fight me on that if you want to). It’s because it’s the crossroads, the pin, the core of the entire film: depending on the choice they made after that point, that moment could have either been the best moment in the entire movie, or the moment that toppled everything.

The realization of Joe’s dream doesn’t feel like the explosion of confetti and catharsis that he expected. It was just another moment of his life, a great one, but it’s still just part of his life. So what does Joe do? Does he panic? Does he keep going until it feels good? Does he - as he would in a lesser movie trying to give a cookie cutter aesop - immediately quit and realize he should’ve been teaching all along? No, he does none of those things. He absorbs the moment. He realizes that at the end of the dream you’re still just living life, and that you have to appreciate that. Joe isn’t wrong for pursuit of his dream. He’s not wrong for believing that hopes and dreams make life so much more worthwhile. He’s wrong in thinking that those dreams are all that define us, and that their realization is all that makes people themselves worthwhile at all.

And in the end - though I may be getting a bit too referential for this - the unexamined life is just so much less fulfilling than the alternative.

And all that a message and a half! It hits different. It’s mature as all heck. It’s something people my age (especially in my generation), twice my age, half my age never learn. It’s a callsign that sometimes Pixar is still make movies for the people who were kids way back when Toy Story was released, and are now insecure adults wondering why the world isn’t as wonderful as they saw on the screen. It’s brilliant. I said before that Joe interprets the “Spark” to be one’s purpose in life. The one thing that makes them who they are, that they are on the planet to do. He is wrong, absolutely and utterly. And in that misconception, when #22 finally does get their Spark just from being on Earth and seeing what its life, he accuses them of leeching self-actualization over his own personal ambitions, fully believing that they didn’t find a “purpose" on her own, but just copied his. But the Spark, as it turns out, is just the joy of living, the thing that makes people want to live. It can come from a dream, or just from watching the beauty of the sun set over a leaf drifting in the wind. Only in understanding this can Joe finally understand what he’s been missing in life, only then can he reconcile with #22 and help her finally be born, only then can he walk into the world and know how he’s going to live it.

We never find out what Joe decides, whether he goes back to teaching, or continues with the band. The choice is open to him, but we never find out which one he takes - another choice that keeps the aesop from falling apart. The point of all of that wasn’t that Joe has to do one thing or another to be happy, it was that Joe needs to be happy and secure in himself before he chooses what his life should be. Either of those could make him happy. Neither of those could. But now he’s in a much better place to see it, and do what he can.

We also never find out what #22 is like when she (or he, etc) is born. The two of them never meet past the point where #22 goes to Earth. Their time together has passed, and #22′s life is now their own. And that’s a great choice either. I’ve seen the occasional person feel that the choice made in this paragraph or noted in the previous one made the story confusing, but they’re ultimately what make the story what it is. The answer isn’t the necessity of resolution, its the reaffirmation of the journey. It reminds me somewhat of Wreck-It Ralph (an example of the main Disney Studio delivering a complex aesop, rather Pixar delivering them all), where being a villain wasn’t Ralph’s problem - it was that he wasn’t happy doing the thing he loved. You have to live, from living you will learn, and from learning you will do. The sheer incredible execution of this message (as you may have guessed, it’s a fairly difficult one to relay adequately in a film narrative, and the movie goes non-traditional in conclusion to maintain it) would have made this film a recommend for me even if it wasn't also beautifully animated, very well acted, funny (there’s a Knicks joke that floored me), heartwarming and relatable. But it’s also all of those things, so I have to recommend it twice as much. It is, regrettably, another movie with a black lead where the lead spends most of it transfigured into a form that’s not a black person (a soul, and then a cat), and I’ve already seen some grumbling that instead for much of it a character explicitly coded as a white woman is in his body instead, but I perceive that as an issue that’s endemic to the industry than a fault in this movie specifically. Everyone does that, but this is the only movie I’ve seen where doing that is an essential part of how the narrative develops the characters (Joe has to not be himself in order to understand his life from an outside perspective, a la Scrooge as a ghost watching his own history), and so I don’t scorn the movie for it. I, however, would very much like Hollywood to start doing that less, and - hey - as a prospective writer that’s one of those things I plan to do my part to combat. This movie, however, gets a pass in my book in ways that the general usage of this concept does not. In short, you should see it. If you get the chance to see it right now, you should take it to feel good at the end of this incredibly insane year. If you don’t want to have to sign up for Disney+ to see it now, I get you and understand, but if you get a chance to see it later do not pass it up. It’s one of the few movies I’ve watched that are an instant buy when it becomes available on digital - and the last time a movie did that for me was BlacKKKlansman. Whatever you choose to do, do it well. Keep the spirit alive, always keep searching for the real you - because it’s not always easy to find, but it’s worth looking for - and always remember that you could always have a little soul.