#// yeah you read that alright!!
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cant stop thinkin bout charles and erik readin together on the couch but instead of reading with him charles is listening to eriks thoughts while he reads. Live mind commentary ……..
#xmen#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#snap chats#the rare time i post an idea of mine only because i really cant think of a way id draw this#usually i hoard my ideas cause i like surprising you guys but this aint really one i feel like drawing so. For You my friends#like i COULD but. idk just isnt particularly something im itching to draw it just seems cute#but anyways no chat let me cook alright hear me out cause i talk in my brain all the time while i read#sometimes i stop reading just to think about a bit i read yeah#i want charles to listen in on all of eriks side comments or observations he makes while reading something#like if he wanted to charles could read the whole book in less than five minutes- maybe shorter than that#and that aint fun that aint cool …. so time for Audible: Husband Edition. With Commentary#ITD BE SO COZY just hangin out by the fireplace …. maybe its snowin outisde … if snow even exists anymore atp#a light fire cracklin and the study SEEMS totally quiet otherwise and yet…..#charles has been locked in to erik’s off-the-cuff literary analysis and mild comments for the past twenty minutes. its simple but its bliss#charles doesnt have to worry about being seen as invasive .. he doesnt have to suppress his powers …#the rare occasion erik lets charles into his mind for somethin so innocent .. ive made myself sick i fear#see now i wanna try writing a fic but 1.) have written in years 2.) id have to really think hard on how erik would commentate on a book#hm…… actually i do wonder what erik’s commentary on The Fable of the Bees would be …..#IN ANY CASE. maybe - at the very least- i can draw cherik by the fireplce someday ….#thatd be cute … hm …. depends on if i get in the mood for it down the line#anyways i have to drive back to my dorm !!! boo !!!! so good night everyone !!!!!
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Jedediah and Octavius
Some wips (but I forgot to take pictures of most of the steps) + the 'clean' version (basically without the hearts because I posted this on Instagram too and people I know irl follow me there 🥲)
#I was so scared to color this but it turned out alright#this was my first ever ship actually. I think I was 8 when I watched the movie for the first time#(couldn't have been much younger. I had to learn how to read or else how would I read the subtitles? anyway)#then I watched the second movie and their relationship cemented in my head. a few years after the third film came and yeah#at the time I didn't even know what shipping was actually#night at the museum#natm octavius#natm jedediah#natm#jedtavius#jedediah and octavius#fanart#art#traditional art#if you made it this far reading the tags feel free to tell us what was your first ship :)#btw watch this post completely flop (I spent too much time making it. it's the rules of the internet I guess)#Jed's gay hip pose#gaius octavius#jedediah smith
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D:BH Rarepairsweek 7 | @dbhrarepairs
Day 1 - North/Kara
#dbhrarepairsweek#northara#north x kara#dbh#dbhrarepairs#dbh mods#d:bh#detroit: become human#dbh kara#dbh north#ok so i kept writing captions for this scene but i realised that i think it's more fun if you can read what u want in it if u want?#big story au or just romantic au?#r they revolutionary leaders?#co-parenting alice?#just struggling together?#did they kiss or just hold hands??#WHAT MATTERS IS: IT IS NORTHARA#THEY'RE NEAT ALRIGHT#like there's some fun potential there#i have MORE great scenes with them but i didnt have time so i wanted something light and less conceptual to start off the week hehe#helped me get back in the gif-making groove#also i tHINK this is the post format i want to go with but yeah#i want them all to look consistent but if i make any changes be ready for that#(also i rly enjoyed the prompts but im doing gifs this year a.k.a it's a bit more limited so NO PROMPTS. )#(BUT GONNA TRY TO MAKE 1 DIFFERENT PAIRING PER DAY)
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i think it's probably somewhat clear that i see isolde and kakania as lesbians (seems to be a common hc anyway) but i think i want to explore how that'd fit into their respective characterizations, not necessarily only from a shipping standpoint. note that this does get into headcanon territory, still i try to keep it as in-character as i can
i think kakania would actually be pretty open about it. in the 1910s?? i mean sure, she's already a controversy as she is ... an arcanist, an uncertified psychiatrist with unconventional methods, an outspoken member of society who stirs up public opinion. might as well give herself one more reason to be a subject of controversy. those who are set on hating her probably have no intention of changing that, so hey, might as well authentically be herself in every possible way including this. among those who have a more positive opinion about her, i do think this would make her somewhat of an icon. she draws other members of the community toward her. she lets them know that she is there for them and will fight for them. that they can turn to her and she will not scrutinize them for it. she'd tell them, no, there is nothing wrong with being this way. it isn't something you need to be "cured" from
in line with this, i think it would make sense for the "circle" to be a queer safe space. in fact, i like to think theophil himself could've been bi and thus would've accepted his sister's sexuality. but due to her own inhibitions (which i will touch upon later) i don't think isolde would ever have told him.
meanwhile for isolde ... i think it's more complicated. having a sexuality outside of the norm would be a deviation from the socially acceptable definition of the "perfect noble" she tries to be. so even if she were to ever consider it, she would simply end up pushing those thoughts away. no, not a chance. this shouldn't bother her at all. she's supposed to be perfect, yet she already has enough problems in her life as a member of the dittarsdorf family. considering the possibility of herself being anything but straight would lead to more problems, wouldn't it? and that's the last thing she needs. nonetheless she's ... never been attracted to a man either. but she tries not to think too much of it. maybe she just needs to wait it out. or so she tells herself
now to piece it all together ... i do really like the idea of kakania being her ... awakening. in fact i think it would make a lot of sense for her story, what with kakania being the metaphorical key to the doors that have always surrounded and confined isolde ... so hear me out. when isolde started associating with her and the circle she realized that it felt far less suffocating than ... pretty much any other aspect of her life. it's like a breath of fresh air. kakania in particular would fascinate isolde, in a way that makes isolde question things about herself. perhaps she even comes close to having a realization. but again, isolde remembers who she needs to be, and stops herself short.
eventually though, she would learn what kind of person kakania is, and what she believes in and fights for. this only deepens isolde's admiration further and she finally comes to a point of acceptance about her feelings. alright. i can accept this realization now. she no longer pushes it to the back of her mind. there's still a bit of repression and shame left in there but meeting someone who has not only awakened her, but also wouldn't judge her for it, has changed something within her entirely. the feelings overflow and she can deny it no longer. but again, at the end of the day she still needs to be perfect and socially acceptable. she can't just ... exist as freely as kakania does. but it's alright, isolde has feigned compliance for so long regardless of however difficult it might be. putting up with expectations has been a regular part of her life. so there it is, something authentic about this actor that she can't show to anyone else because it doesn't fit the part that she's supposed to play. kakania is allowed to know though, of course she is. it can just be their little secret. and one way or another, she'll figure out how isolde feels toward her. surely kakania would be quite honored to be on the receiving end of the affection of such a wonderful lady. as long as this affection doesn't eventually turn into a catalyst for destruction, right ...
#reverse 1999#r1999#kakania#isolde#isokania#ermmmmmmmmmmmm. yeah guys here's the Lesbian Essay alright#at this point i'm considering writing fic#even though i feel like plot isn't exactly my strong suit#nonetheless if you read through this entire word salad. i hope you enjoyed it#and i hope it makes Sense#i want to sort out more of my thoughts#i don't play when it comes to hyperfixation. i will dissect them. i will understand them#adding this to the new tag#lesbian kakania agenda
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#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
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hey just to let you know, I wrote the dick pic comic from you abogagos post into a fic! I found the situation hilarious and decided to give it a go.
here's the link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60821428
feel free to give it a read!
LETS FUCKING GO
#NO FUCKING WAY YOU NAMED IT ‘ACCIDENTALLY?’#IM LOSING MY SHIT . IM ACTUALLY. LAUGHED SO HARD READING THIS#THEYRE SO STUPID I HATE THEM. I LOVE THEM. WTF#edgeworth: for my own sanity I cannot let my mind wander about why wright sounded out of breath right after sending me a- scandalous photo#me: alright yeah makes sense. still got that stick up your ass I fuck w it#edgeworth: so instead im going to make him come out kicking and screaming starting with my vinyl record of Fleetwood Mac Rumours#LMAOOOOO. ARE YOU SERIOJS. LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO#THIS IS SO OVRR THE TOP AND YET SO BELIEVABLE FOR ME. ACE FUCKIGN ATTORNEY#casually dropping the bombshell that Phoenix Wright does thirst traps on tinder AS FHE LEAD UP TO THIS. AND IT WORKS#I ENJOYED READING THIS SM IM HONORED YOU TOOK IT AND ROLLED WITH IT. OH MY GOD
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Me for the whole episode:
Me for the 15 seconds of sskk interaction at the end:
#This is a joke obviously. I wouldn't dare disregard the rest of Atsushi screentime#Everything else though...#Jk ajhbcflkasbv the Ranpo chapter is alright. Seeing Yosano is always a bliss especially in the new outfit!!!#I take issues with the sexism but eh when do I not#First time I watched I was like of course I knew the killer! I read Agatha Christie lol#(This is what happens when you have a mystery enthusiast mother btw.#I've always been intimately familiar with Christie and Doyle and Poe and whatsnot)#Nothing much else to say! Great animation quality.#Episode 2x11 is my favourite anime episode so. Yeah :') Looking forward to it#The whole rewatch has been leading to this moment#random rambles#Me when the scene changes and I hear Atsushi's voice: 🥰🥰🥰🥰💞💞💞💞😍😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️❤️#Edit: (It is 15 seconds. I counted.)
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What are your favourite telltale signs that a fanfic was written by an american?
Some that always sticks out to me:
- Characters drinking lots of coffee
- Tea with cream instead of milk (it’s not unheard of, but it’s not your standard cup of tea)
- People mentioning hospital bills
- Being unable to write smokers casually
- Sirius is salivating for a Harley Davidson and not a Triumph
Okay honestly the tea thing in general is a BIG one. I think people don't always understand the way tea is consumed in the UK, how ingrained it is in daily life. Ive basically got a rotating cup of tea all day. Growing up in my house, even when we lived in america, someone would offer to make tea basically hourly lol. There's different situations when tea is offered in slightly different ways, different ways of making tea like builder's tea, different things that are served with tea, tea meaning 'dinner' in some regions, and these customs are hard to understand unless you've lived them.
Often Remus is portrayed as a tea fanatic because he offers tea when Harry visits him, which is always funny to me because that's just the normal thing to do when someone's visiting.
Another tea-related one I encountered once (this made me laugh a LOT and I felt a bit bad for the author) was that Lily 'woke up to the smell of tea.' This is an instance I think using coffee would have been alright lol, they obviously just replaced 'coffee' with 'tea', not realising tea doesn't really smell much when you make it and definitely doesn't waft about the house like coffee does. James would have to be holding the cup under her nose or brewing several large vats of the stuff in the same room lol
I agree with the ones you've said. In what was once the most popular jily fic in the fandom, there's a whole thing with Lily somewhat righteously trying to get James to quit smoking when, in the 70s, everyone and your nan smoked, even indoors, and Lily herself probably would have too. In a lot of Europe young people from all walks of life will casually smoke. rah where's my baccy etc
Similar to the Harley thing, there's often a lot of American music/TV/food/pop culture used. Or anachronistic stereotypically British things like everyone being into the Beatles.
THE NAMES. Characters having surnames that are very much from America's immigrant heritage, polish or german etc, like 'Schneider' and 'Kowalski' and things. First names too, this is a bit less dire but a lot of names common in the US wouldn't have been given to a child in the 60s. Specifically aristocratic characters would have a particular set of names, although pureblood conventions are obv a bit different than irl.
Another one is general drinking culture. Like I mentioned the idea of, honestly, anyone who isn't an obvious child being asked for ID in a pub is very silly haha, unless maybe in a student area. Whereas in America they'll ask everyone for ID before they let them sit down. (even my 60yr old dad has been asked lol)
in my experience Americans have a strange relationship with alcohol in general, which is both slightly puritan and enthusiastic. My theory is that this is because of prohibition (I find this very historically interesting) and they aren't as prone to casual daily drinking as Europeans, rather they tend to go all out on specific occasions. I love an American house party haha, but I don't think Americans would go for work drinks at the pub as often.
Exaggerated distances between places. Working class families having multiple cars and big houses and driving everywhere even within London. Aristocratic characters doing things they'd never do and having things they'd never have. The Blacks are often portrayed as too fantabulously wealthy imo in a very Rockerfeller New England-y way. Also they wouldn't speak French to each other lol
In general class distinctions, which are very important in the UK, are difficult to understand from an outside perspective I think.
However, I think the main tell for me is usually dialogue, SORRY THIS GOT SO LONG:
This issue, tbf, is very understandable. It's very difficult to achieve natural-sounding dialogue for dialects that you're not personally familiar with. Tbh I think it's not always easy to achieve natural-sounding dialogue in general for anyone. I've lived in America too and now have lived in a non-english speaking country for many years, mostly speaking catalan/spanish on a daily basis, so I get confused too and I use american phrases picked up either during my time there or from the internet. Anyway point is I think about/notice dialogue a lot, so here are my thoughts.
There's often overuse/misuse of slang or certain terms that can end up being amusing, like that fan film using 'a row' constantly to describe a bitter fight to the death between sworn enemies haha. Over/misuse of things like 'bloody,' 'wanker,' 'twat' lol. Understanding what types of characters would say what, and in what situations, can be tricky. 'Pants' is a common mistake because in BrE it means underpants, not trousers. 'Restroom' is also very American. 'College' meaning 'university' ditto. 'Pissed' for angry rather than 'drunk,' 'mad' also to a lesser extent-- I'd normally understand 'are you mad' as 'are you crazy.'
I saw a tumblr post once, one I thought would be a bit mean to reply to directly, in which a character jokes to Sirius about 'doing fags' because he smokes cigarettes and is in a relationship with Remus. lmao. That's a good example of someone trying to use a slang term without understanding the way it's really used. Also a good example of someone gratuitously using a slur (which is more common in America anyway) for no reason lol oh well
In general, I think since Americans are used to hollywood portrayals of British characters who mostly use something akin to RP, even authors who are diligent about BrE can end up sounding a bit stilted and a bit pride and prejudice-y with their teen characters (except with 'bloody wanker!' sprinkled in occasionally.) And this is fine, I don't think it's fair to expect perfectly natural/accurate dialogue from fanfic authors all the time, wherever they're from. But a line like "Yes, it must have been nice" might sound more natural as "Yeah, must've been nice," though it depends on the character obv.
Personally I think I overuse contractions because I find them fun (I love a cheeky 'oughtn't' or a 'mightn't.' or 'shouldn't've' lol. tbh im always saying 'ought' and 'ought not' irl but that's just me being weird.) But contractions and dropping certain words is common in informal BrE, what's tricky is that if this is misused it also sounds odd. So it's a difficult balance to get right. For instance: 'it would be nice if they had' can become 'be nice if they had' but not 'be nice if they.' or 'be nice if they'd.' This was a professionally made video game rip but there's a character in Mass Effect who talks like that, it drove me mad.
I love to think about accents and dialects and dialogue in general (which is why this got so long sorry) and imo the key is just familiarising yourself with a dialect as much as possible and making sure you hear the accent in your head as you write. Using slang terms in ways you've heard them used before, and carefully. For younger characters you'll want to watch something like the inbetweeners rather than bridgerton haha. Or something like Would I Lie To You or Taskmaster where there's a variety of panelists and therefore of accents, both series are free on youtube and are excellent!
#the ID thing in america is so wild and i always forget when i go there#they wont accept my spanish ID so i have to bring my passport with me everywhere#anyway personally i think people should use flippin' a bit more haha. esp for the 70s.#replies#i was reading something earlier where everyone was saying 'yes' to each other back and forth#'yes i think so. do you agree?' 'yes and are you coming to the show?' 'yes i shall be there'#which i think is uncommon in casual speech even in america#where ppl say 'yep/sure/sounds good' a lot#and for a british character i'd use 'yeah/alright' or if theyre a dumbledoreish character 'indeed/quite so/certainly'#not that ppl don't say 'yes' EVER haha. it's just less common than you'd think#there are other things i can point out (i truly think about this a LOT) but anyway. its too long already
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I don't want you to forget me I want you to die with me. I miss you I should have lived. I love you. Why are you putting these words in my mouth?
(artfight attack for @tsunagite, ft. reinhardt :3)
#art#bella#fc!bella#lc ocs#lobotomy corporation#artfight attack#HI DID YOU KNOW IM NORMAL ABOUT THESE TWO? :) <- face of a normal guy#i love bellas fucked up psyche. it really just throws everything on full blast to cope with fucked up shit#'reinhardts dead gang' 'alright. what do we do' (socratic seminar)#'we have decided to hash out every single emotion youre feeling all at once. possibly via psychosis. please do not resist'#<- same exact process happened when she was hallucinating the alt as well in friendcorp. shes normal!#also the vast majority of the text here is all written by me so i encourage you to read through it! :3#lots of it also from/referencing 'curiosity killed my beia'. absolute banger of a comic#theres. so much detail here#like if anyone wants the entire list i made i can dm it#+ theres more than that list too#specifically the halo + pins on the little winged reins in the bottom#the halo references the attack this is a revenge of and the pins reference 'experiment' by syumi#<- may be misremembering the title but like. you get it#edit: yeah i got it wrong - its calldd specimen#anyways i love these two theyre so fucked. i think about them forever <3
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e-42 prowlerbyte angst (kinda) cuz i thought it'd be funny but in like a sad way
margo actually hating the prowler and thinking anyone with masks and weapons are terrible ppl just bc of how bad things are on earth-42
every time miles and his uncle show up on tv news channels she talks shit abt them not knowing she's talkin about her bf and his uncle
miles is oddly defensive every time, just sayin stuff like "margo you literally have never seen these two hurt civilians or anyone else but cops for that matter"
margo argues back "they obviously steal stuff and use bombs that could hurt someone tho. and nobody who's up to any good is swingin around wearing stuff like THAT"
miles rolls his eyes and pouts a lil bit about it but is genuinely distressed that his own gf can't see the good that the prowler does on a near daily basis so that pushes him to actually help more civvies whenever possible.
it kinda annoys aaron but he understands. eventually aaron lets him go off and do his own thing occasionally, stopping bank robbers from shooting unarmed bystanders and whatnot
the word spreads relatively quickly and soon prowler gains a "vigilante" label on the streets. a couple of his saves end up on the news, too
cue miles smirking at margo one day as they're sat in miles' living room with the tv on.
"...so. looks like prowler's moving different lately, just like i said he would. not lookin too bad there, is he?"
margo scoffs and shakes her head. "i mean... it's cool that he's saving ppl now i guess. doesnt mean hes a good guy exactly but we'll take what we can get!"
this definitely doesnt help miles' paranoia at all tho. he's even more adamant with his uncle that margo cannot know abt their prowler business now more than ever.
#clown horn#spiderverse#miles g morales#margo kess#prowlerbyte#i read a fic once where margo was miles' mj#and so then i think its fitting for them to have a lil “mj gets saved in the rain” moment yanno what i mean#its their canon event ALSJDJDKSLS#margo gets saved by the prowler and she allll of a sudden does a whole 180 on him#miles preens a lil as she goes on and on abt how ☆great☆ the prowler is!! how strong he was. how chivalrous...#margo: AHEM I MEAN-- yeah he did alright! i'm fine now. he was... he was okay i guess so#miles: yeah i bet he was p cool huh 💅💅💅😏#margo: yeah... i mean... i still love you but i meannnnn if the prowler wants to like hmu real quick--#miles: O-KAAYYY you better stop that now *laughing* i get it!#margo: ahahaha yeah i see why youre a big fan of your boy now. he's... yeah he was p cool ☺️#miles is content enough with margo having a crush on his alter ego for now#maybe thatll make it all go down easier when she eventually finds out...#mi writing
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i just watched all of us strangers and um, that shit hits hard
#mescal my new crush with three of my all time favourite actors?! lgbtq rep?!#you bet i was watching that#(spoilers ahead >>)#but fml the tag under it said ''fantasy'' so i sort of went in with a hint#except at first i thought it was like a dystopian thing or an alien thing#and then it just got worse when my only two options turned out to be ''he sees ghosts'' or ''he suffers from schizophrenia''#😭😭 and the last scene omfg the scene where he founds him dead bro I FELT THAT COMING#i wasn't expecting to read the guy was already dead since the first day they show him?!#like stop. why did i even go digging further#yeah it made sense bc of the smell but 😭😭 i was already destroyed you didn't need to fucking kill him alright#let's not even begin to unwrap the whole rollercoaster with his parents bc i've got my issues myself and ugh#idek if anyone's gonna read this but i needed to vent#listen it was a good film but it has some touchy subjects frme#at least it wasn't all in his mind 😭#fml it'd been some time since a film destroyed me like this#films#all of us strangers#paul mescal#andrew scott#rambling
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erik will genuinely jump at any chance he can to steal charles' last name and be so catty about it i know this for a fact WHAT is his deal
[Magneto (2011)]
#cherik#snap chats#if i had a nickel every time erik went by 'mr xavier' at some point id have two and its making me wheeze#like at least the first time it was to be headmaster or whatever so it at least makes sense but vjaevlEVEKJV WHY#needed our mandatory charles mention for the magneto issue ig alright ill take it#legit tho why did he feel inclined to steal charles name vjelkvjeaklj like his names 'erik magnus' in this#while i was trying to answer that fashion ask i stumbled upon this thing and gave it a quick read#its only one issue and fairly short so why not#Context Squad I Guess this issue's just sharing the first time erik moves to new york#hence. stealing charles name i guess vjaLVKJAJKL like girl you didnt do anything evil yet ..... alright .... just to be sure ig...#do you ever think he freezes getting called mr xavier or is he so used to it at this point#maybe he twirling his hair and giggling to himself every time he hear it idk#oh but yeah he didnt do anything evil yet. he actually gets his suit in this issue from a woman named cassandra .....#not charles sister of course but still im laughing anyway because he wants her to join him in his Not-Brotherhood group#and shes like 'i met you like five days ago youre insane' and the sort#its an ok read. its unnerving seeing erik smile so much- especially so broadly but its not like. an offensive issue. its standard#it does the job on sharing the story. not that im a critic of any sort vjalkjkaLJ#at the very least it's implied erik has a notable accent in this so thats very cool 🥰#its always cute whenever erik admits hes a drama lover too like vjeLVJEalkvjelkj like at least hes self aware this theater kid 😩#ok bye ive been meaning to work on something but ive been running around all day valkvjkae
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damn I yap a lot
tldr; im alive, sadly im still on hiatus, other stuff is fine now I just have new [physical] problems, you'll know when I'm fully back (give it another couple months) and comfortable, I'm in a [technically well-over] 3-month long ongoing depressive episode [not tryna do trauma olympics or make anyone feel bad btw it's all chill]
so sorry if I've left you hanging [with art or smth], I'll get to it in time, I promise [I may have unwillingly forgotten, likely not but there's a chance]
Hey, I'm alive, I have been for the.. almost 6 months I've been gone. Holy shit, I didn't even realise that it's been that long. I figured I should at least say something in case anyone is worried or wondering even though everything isn't solved yet, so, here. [under the read more so it's not flooding or anything]
Also, I figure I should apologise for venting on main and just leaving it up - this is all going to stay up because I need to keep it somewhere to aid with my memory issues - but, still, must've been a little weird
Absolutely not a good time to say all this [for me bc I haven't thought this message through] but I'm kinda half-back, just on hiatus from socials due to declining physical health. Really badly declining, I need help honestly
Originally, as you know, I was gone because I had a really bad fall out with my mother, but things pertaining to that have been solved now [except me not feeling 100% safe and trusting to my mother, that will never change. She's tried hard, I just wish I could find her reliable emotionally as well]. It's just that, since then, basically, all these physical problems that I don't understand have been royally fucking me up and messing with my mental too. It's messed with everything I love. I don't know what to do anymore.
Oh wait, where I was actually going with this, so
OK nvm I forgot but you'll see me around bc I've been talking to certain people trying to pretend like nothing's happened and I've made the kinda-silly decision to not fully come off hiatus or talk to other certain people before I'm okay again.
#so the post is for the practical stuff n the tags r for emotional btw [or at least I tried to do that]#[yeah just except the para starting with “originally” I'll keep that there despite being unnecessary]#-#genuinely. im so scared. im so scared all the time [most of the time not scared of anything in particular - I mean the physical problems#fuck me up by making me scared and sad and tired most of the time for no reason]#I have no energy and it's all up and down and even though I actually feel okay rn [not good but okay] after literally breaking down an hour#ago I still know this shouldn't be happening#nobody is going to believe me if I say I have high-functioning depression. who do I tell. well they will believe me but how would it help#and I'm so scared to tell anyone for no reason. I'm not scared mentally rn but no matter whether or not Im ok the emotion stops me from#taking action if that makes sense.#--#I don't understand what I did to deserve this why is this happening to me#why are these internal problems out of my control happening to me#I don't understand and it truly deeply scares me#---#I meant to out this at the start of the tags but fuck it I'm too far in and on mobile to go all the way back now#thank you if you read this far. truly thank you because I need someone to talk to and my irl's are not an option for all different reasons#if I reach out to you about smth random please talk to me as if I'm still not half-gone.#feel free to message me whenever about wtv despite the “hiatus” I need it#... if you have read this far for whatever reason please text me that my Rui loves me my brain is trying to guilt me and say he doesn't#[that just happens when I'm in a certain state even tho that's when I need Rui the most selfship mutuals u get it pls help me out]#he. he does love me right? I swear he does I just. can't seem to believe it right now#I shouldn't have pushed all that to the bottom when it was directly telling my mutuals what I need lol#I feel a little hopeless sometimes. that's not like me I'll be alright in the end. no not that. I'll be better than alright I can fix this#I can fix this. I just need help. god I need help.#at the very least I'll be alright
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(from this video)
#not a confession#helluva boss#the fact that they even mentioned Chaz just made me screech mentally#because... you know. if you've read my oneshot you know#but yes exactly. I also tie back to him the fact that Millie was so serious and untrusting during the flashback#(to be fair. being a mercenary is cutthroat business. but even while fighting and killing she seems a lot goofier nowadays)#how the timeline works in my head is#affair in Wrath. Chaz bounces to another ring and breaks her heart. she stays home for a while after that before moving to the city in Prid#she could've had her walls up out of a sense that the city slickers would only betray her#Chillie seems significant to me bc we've SEEN just how MUCH it takes for Millie to snap when it comes to loved ones and their bullshit#let alone turn from loving affection to seething murderous hatred#so you KNOW that whatever happened between her and Chaz WOUNDED her. or at least offended in a huge way idk#someone on AO3 wrote it so he cheated on her with her sister. like yeah that could do the job alright#though that does imply she loved him which is easily the biggest plot hole here. like. look at that thing#what is there to love#about Chazwick Thurman#he's an embarrassing roach with a dick complex#(also my girl Sallie would never have standards that low. please. she's also a lesbian now but that's another thing)#tbf Chaz and Blitzo are quite similar... except Blitzo has way less shallow writing... I wonder if that could be explored#her currently being so close to someone who is in theory strongly reminiscent of her ex. putting up with so much from him too#ah but I shan't keep talking Chillie. we'd be here all night if I tried to explain all my mental lore#isn't it funny how I've thought so much about them despite despising S02e03 and becoming physically ill by Chaz's sceentime#on my first watch#and then never watching it again#it's just the Concept of him alright. like shared ex of M&M who's a conman a loser a former mafia goon & whores himself to survive#who are you and how did you get here#plus the fact that he's a shark bc sharks are so cool. did you know threshers harm and even kill prey by whipping them with their tails#wish we could've seen that#I love it when anthros have their animal traits acknowledged#wow the tags here really derailed from the original screenshot. ignore them please 🙏
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WATER SEVEN BABYYYYY
Look at robin reacting when luffy says he wont give her up.... 🥺🥺
This is a joke right now but its actually a one piece tenet aldjsisjka
Usopp aksbaksjakqk the foreshadow is foreshadowing... Also Robin being happy with the crew after the Aokiji incident... Fuck!!!!
Sanji thinking robin just vanished or flew away and suddenly usopp is soaring thru the skies... imagine
AAAAARGGGGHHHH YOU CAN SEE THE GEARS TURNING
Zoro talking to merry..... only while he is alone of course
Why are nami and sanji matching ajdhakjsk look at the citrus sisters
Carpenter: maybe it was the government
Gov agent: I don't think so, also don't say that they are everywhere
LUFFY SUPPORTS WOMEN'S WRONGS!!!
Don't scream att chopper like that!!! Look at him... So small....
Imu tease???? (No) (Also I've changed websites again bc the translation is kinda off , I can't find a good quality b&w spanish translation and the colors scare me (i want the real manga experience))
GET HIM ICEBURG!!!!
I truly forgor if this is just a lie about her wanting to find the rio poneglyphs or genuine because she wants to die and will do it for them... because in skypiea she says she is not interested in the weapons so maybe if the gov pardons her but considering what she wants is illegal then idk abdjabjs this is such a dumb thing to forget... like thats important girl where did it go (reading this after remembering and it's kinda funny... i will make any sacrifice to kill myself (and keep you safe)... she goes HARD)
Little paulie and mozu and kiwi.... omg hello (the SBS says the twins wanted to be shipwrights too omg)
Franky's backstory is small but it does so much for me like it is so central to the themes... boats and people...
DID SOMEBODY ORDER MORE TRAGIC BROTHERS?
The fact that franky needs to learn this lesson to pass it on to robin.... do you understand how big this is.... also Tom does exactly as he says and takes responsibility for franky and what he has done... because he has done nothing wrong AND THAT'S HIS SON and he just punched spandam bc he wanta him to feel the pain franky feels... Tom is such a man..... proud of having built eater 7 up with the sea train.... goes out with a boom.... should we all kill ourselves....
I am crying again................... franky my god.... and the fucking frog!!! And of course franky can't stop Tom's hope for his island... of course he can't.... he hasnt learnt the lesson yet but this guy isn't over yet!! He has a life of being a pervert cyborg ahead!!! Iceburg following Tom's footsteps but franky not being able to do that bc of his guilt....
This is one of the coolest things chopper has done btw...
NAMII 😭😭😭
Robin damning the world for her crew when all she has ever done is damn her companions for her own sake.... how big is this...
I can't take this...... it's always nami in these positions... it happens AGAIN in Zou with Sanji... there is no way
The love letter gag is too good like damn that's so funny
AND IT'S NAMI GOING THROUGH IT AGAIN!!!! SHE LOVES ROBIN SO MUCH!!!!
#OOOH GRANDPA TEASE!!! he wanted to see luffy too?? omg and he owes garp a favor so he is going to kill him... alright then....#robin attacking FIRST and ZORO coming to her defense!!! CHEFS KISS!!! INCREDIBLE#my GOD!!! ROBIN WANTING TO LEAVE HER PAST BEHIND BC SHE TRULY HAS BEEN CHANGED BY THEM AAAAHHHH#this is so good... aokiji had to end crocodile and he still has a debt to someone (garp?) AND smoker told him stuff about luffy too#kokoro is such an mvp... be careful with the government agents she says.... hell yeah they should do that#the people in water 7 just giving advice to the pirates akdhaksjak sure go fix your boat but down there#robin laughing like ufufufu is so cute... also kalifa knowing everything bc she is literally a gov agent 💀 ICEBURG WAKE UP!!!#lucci pulling out the ship of theseus response akdhakaj conundrum solved everyone!!!#usopp is so heartbreaking already... beaten he goes to franky to get his money back knowing he will lose bc he wants to fix the merry... go#zoro cutting steel like its nothing... yeahhhhh also does luffy think the ship and usopp are like sanji and the baratie??#he wants to sacrifice himself for it but doesn't realize his life is the treasure and not the thing... luffy realizing this is not worth it#the fight was insane.... usopp feels useless and is enmeshed with the merry so he won't let it go and tells luffy does not care when he doe#so luffy gets mad at usopp for lying and not understanding what is going on and says he is not a carpenter (true but hurts) so he is nothin#god it is so bad... sanji breaking p the fight is so important AFTER zoro says to calm down and talk but they rile each other up...#THE DIALOGUE IS INSANE!!!! USOPP IN DENIAL AND LUFFY TAKES ALL OF HIS BAIT IT'S JUST SO AJDBAKSNSKN AND THE ONLY LIES ARE WHAT USOPP THINKS#ABOUT LUFFY!!!! BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT TO UNDERSTAND!! HE JUST FEELS!! HE SAW MERRY!! THE ONLY ONE!!!#luffy just laying on the hammock for hours... telling nami usopp wouldnt give up his life for an argument... then he only needs to fight...#is luffy fighting usopp just so he can de stress kind of??? like he is letting him get his punches in and then he will come back#once he thinks things through... like nami did... and what sanji ends up doing too... like just give him what he wants#luffy likes fighting friends even and this is the only fight he doesn't want.... the merry crying GOD!!!!#the impact dial... it hurts them both.... jesus.... luffy got two hits in but those were enough.... they are making nami cry SANJI KILL THE#everyone is crying but sanji and zoro akdjsks yeah luffy got him what he wanted... he can keep the ship but he can't beat him#and after all if strength is made by conviction luffy knows he is right and usopp is just in denial... so of course he would lose#franky reveal and Robin assassin reveal at the same time.... just remembered when usopp asked her specialty and robin said assassinations 😭#luffy nami adventures hell yeah.... and theres even more after the aqua laguna... LETSGOOOOO#goddamn you can see the thread of kuzan finding robin with the strawhats to then cp9 forcing her to act in water seven....#franky acting weird because he is worried about iceburg... i know it...#iceburg: its weird youre working for the government... but thats for the audience to worry about. not for me#pluton was built on water seven ✍️✍️✍️ also iceburg saying weapons are bad no matter who holds them... yeah franky would agree#reading one piece
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we literally need to start shaming people for ignorance again
#i AM fucking pretentious. and you should be too. in the case of Muslim Bosniaks but also beyond. what the fuck do you mean everyone has a#right to their opinion like yeah sure but not if it’s wildly uneducated and you’re a goddamned dumbass like. you SHOULD be shamed off the#internet forever like yeah we’re not all experts on everything that’s the beauty of human connection and interchanging experiences and#knowledge but if all you have to offer me is fascist and red pill rhetoric you got spoonfed from people equally as dumb but perhaps a#smidge more manipulative/charismatic than yourself then guess if i want to hear it#fuck OFF read a book should become a routine comeback again im not joking#for a population that has ALL this information at the tips of our fingertips we sure are collectively becoming incredibly stupider#TIPS OF OUR FINGERTIPS LMFAO okay pleonasm queen ig you got MAD mad#god. alright. back to work im doing something. eheeee not saying what bc evil eye. but EXCITING
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