#// nOT GOING TO JUST LIKE EXPLAIN WHY BECAUSE I DONT WANNA JUST DUMP EVERYTHING ON THE DASH BECAUSE I TRY AND KEEP IT ALL HAPPY YKNOW but ..

[writelives]

It might be a reblog a few memes kind of day and hope for a spam

[haemosexuality]

im rewatching she-ra and naturally im gonna want to write about it a lot. starting by breaking down the catradora conflict origin story scene from s01e02 the sword part 2

people have said this before but the most important thing to keep in mind here is how different their understanding of whats going on is. theyre both approaching this with completely different views and so they misunderstand what the other means.

Adora: There's no time. We have to put a stop this.

Catra: What? Why?

Adora: Because this is a civilian town. Look around! These aren't insurgents. They're innocent people.

Catra: Yeah, sure. Innocent people who kidnapped a Horde officer. Now come on, let's get you back to the Fright Zone. Shadow Weaver is freaking out. [laughing] It'd be funny if she weren't such a terrible person.

so immediately theres two things i wanna say about this part, about how catra reacts to stuff. first off, something we learn about catra throughout the whole show and especially in the portal-alternative-reality, is that shes big on Pretending Nothing Is Wrong. whenever shes feeling upset or angry about something, she will start joking around and acting like shes just totally super chill guys, dw ("Ugh, whatever. It's not like I even care. I just wanna get out of this dump at some point before I dieee of boredom). Shes acting like that in this scene. Adora was missing for hours, shadow weaver was breathing down her neck and threatening her, she was already worried adora might have left at this point. she cant let adora know how worried she was tho, so shes all jokes and fast paced conversation. To Adora, tho, it just looks like catra doesnt care, like she doesnt understand the gravity of the situation.

and the other thing is that honestly? I dont think catra does care. about the town, i mean. i think catra was ready for war in a way adora never was. theyre both seeing combat for the first time here, and adora hates it. training for war is completely different than being in the battlefield, and adora couldnt handle it. face to face with it she couldnt tolerate seeing people suffering and dying, houses being burned down, a whole village destroyed. when the horde brainwashed adora into thinking they were only doing the necessary to save etheria, she completely and fully believed it, and when faced with the reality of the horde she immediately realized how wrong that was. Catra, tho, could not care less. she never believed in what the horde said, she knew full well what the horde did, so this isnt a surprise for her. and i do think shes naturally a bit sadistic, or at least growing up among the violence of the horde made her so. either way, shes seeing battle here for the first time and shes completely fine with it. doesnt even spare it all a second glance. why would she care about these people she never met if the most important thing in the world is right here in front of her? (i think even if adora hadnt left that night and went into the battlefield as a force captain, she wouldve ended up deserting. she cant stand seeing people suffer and she cant stand not saving them. shes too good, too selfless for that. catra isnt.) (also she is so ready to kill at all times. she loves violence. i once saw someone say how shadow weaver thought adora was the "cutthroat, ruthless warrior" when that was actually catra and they were totally right)

adora is also trying something futile here, she doesnt need to explain to catra that the horde is bad and hurts innocent ppl because catra has known that all her life

Adora: Catra, no. I can't go back. Not until the Horde leaves this town alone. You have to help me.

Catra: What are you saying?

Adora: I’m saying, this is wrong. They've been lying to us, manipulating us. Hordak, Shadow Weaver, all of them.

Catra: Duh! Did ya just figure that out? Manipulation is Shadow Weaver's whole thing. She's been messing with our heads since we were kids.

(the captions in the pics are slightly wrong, nvm that.) everything i said before. adora just realized all of this, while catra has always known, probably because the abuse adora suffered was more manipulation-and-brainwashing, while shadow weaver always made clear to catra that she didnt give a shit about her, so she suffered physical abuse with little attempt to convince her this was fine.

the "what are you saying?" is one of the things that show how different their perspective is. adora is talking about going against the horde and helping the town, while catra immediately gets more personal. what do you mean? are you saying that you might leave the horde? leave me?

Adora: How could you possibly be okay with that?

adora means, how could you be ok with the horde lying about its actions, and killing innocent people? how could you be ok with the horde raising us to do the same? and catra hears, how could you be ok with shadow weaver and hordak abusing us?

Catra: Because, it doesn't matter what they do. The two of us look out for each other. And soon we'll be calling the shots. Now come on, can we go home already?

catra replies: because, i love you. because you have my back and i have yours. because nothing really bad can happen as long as we have each other, remember? and soon enough, we'll be powerful enough that they cant hurt us anymore. Adora hears, because i dont care about these people dying, the only thing thats important is you and i. and anyways, soon its gonna be Us killing them, isnt that good? lets go back home to the evil murder place.

Adora: I'm not going home, Catra. I can't. Not after everything I've seen. Come with me. You don't have to go back there. We can fix this.

adora says: im starting to realize now how wrong i was about everything. we're not the good guys, and i cant stand for that. i cant stand around and watch people get hurt. i cant stand around and watch you get hurt. lets leave, together, and have a better life, please. lets do the right thing.

Catra: Are you kidding? You've known these people for, what, a couple of hours? And now you're just gonna throw everything away for them?

catra hears, shes willing to leave me. after everything i did for her, all that i took, all of these years of us being together, she would still leave me. she would break our promise. she would leave me behind.

and then she straight up electrocutes adora. ok

she says it was a reflex, but i dont know if i believe her. i dont think she likes hurting adora (not physically. not by this point, anyways), but i do think that shes the type to lash out when upset and immediately regret it, then feel guily about it. which just makes her more upset. :(

Catra: Oh, man. That was a lot stronger than I thought. Are you okay?

Adora: Why are you doing this?

Catra: Because you left me! And if I don't bring you back, Shadow Weaver’s gonna have my head. So, enough with your weird little identity crisis and let's go home already. Or do I need to zap you again?

thats the last time they talk. adora gets teleported away by glimmer, and when they see each other again, its clear that they both made their choice.

the moment adora showed catra she was willing to leave her, there was no coming back for them. because catra would never get over that. she'd spend all her life in that hellscape, putting up with abuse and bullying and probably so much more we dont get to see, because of the promise adora made her. and, in her eyes, adora was ready to leave her on the first opportunity that came up. that hurt. that broke her. and that released something really ugly inside of her.

cue in 2,5 years of homoerotic rivalry and trauma. ok post over if you read this i hope you liked it <3 bye

[twistedroseytoesy]

Here comes trouble

amazing song suggested for Ruggie and i turned it into an AU where ruggie overblots rather than Leona.

Used dialogue from "An Urge to Concede" from book 2, after the italisized text is where the AU starts. Also the song part of the parody is going to be animatic styled to flow a bit better.

"... Tch whatever. I dont even care anymore." Leona grumbled his attitude dropped like a rock in a pond.

"what?" ruggie said somehat dumbfounded by his dormleaders sudden 180 in attitude.

"i'm done. its over." Leona said with a sigh.

"Boss, what are you saying?!" Ruggie said anger and disbelief burning in his exclamation.

"Are you even payin' attention? If Malleus is able to take the field then we got no chance of winning." Leona explained, an air of depression slouching his shoulders. "There's no point even trying. I'm out."

"Y-you can't just...!" Ruggie begged before catching himself and trying to reason with the now sulking lion. "Malleus might still be in the game, but we took out all the other dorms' best players, right? But without you on the field, I don't even know if we'd have a shot at the top three!" He said ears drooping. "You're just going to abandon our dreams?" He said somewhat quietly, unwilling to believe the words he was hearing.

"For all the talk about "the world watching," this is still just schoolkids playin' a game," Leona said sharply. "All you wide-eyed tenderfoots talkin' about your dreams... Pfft. The whole thing amused me, so I threw you a bone. That's all this was." The other students and Ruggie flinched at that. at how their hope and excitement was all for nothing.

"What do you mean? What happened to working together to "turn the world upside down"?!"Ruggie asked desperately, he felt a burning in his heart and he wanted so desperately to believe that all that he had gone through, to finally reach somewhere, was for something. It had to have been for something. Otherwise, why was he so hurt?

"Are you seriously still goin' on about that? All right, fine. You wanna hear the truth?" Leona said now glaring at the hyena boy who was so hard to knock down. "You're a hyena who grew up in a dump, and I'm a secondborn prince who won't ever be king. And there is NO turning that around!" Leona roared and Ruggie felt his greedy little heart break. And from that breaking, he felt anger, rage, indignancy at all that he had done for Leona.

"What? You gotta be kidding me! What is this? You can't just quit after we've come this far! Not after all the hard work we've done, that I've done!" Ruggie said now indignant. The other Savanaclaw students agreed and Ruggie could feel something building up inside of himself but he didn't care. After using up basically all of his magic with Azul's potion, he was beyond pissed at how easily Leona gave up.

"After eveything, we've done! after everything that We worked together to achieve?! you just give up like that?! leaving nothing but crushed dreams?" Ruggie could feel something leaking from his eyes but he refused to back down now. "We're your pack! and you better start acting like a leader or else..."

"or else what Bucchi? You gonna cry about it?" Leona scoffed. "Go ahead and whine all you want. There's no changing that we'll lose it's easier to just give up little hyena." Ruggie felt something snap.

"I've seen people just give up." he said darkly glaring at the ground. " and It never helped anyone. I've never given up because I couldn't afford to." He started to growl, a darkness starting to drip from his eyes and fingertips. The others around him could sense something was very wrong. "You prissy little prince couldn't even handle a small bump in the plan before giving up?! shehehehahahahaha!" Leona's ears went down as more darkness started to pool around Ruggie.

"What did you say to me mutt?" Leona growled back, unwilling to back down from the one he thought was always above. Riddle tried to cut in but he was suddenly frozen in place, many of the students around were too.

"I've worked my tail off day in and day out. If I just gave up I WOULDNT EVEN BE HERE. And you wouldn't either! I'm tired of your high and mighty attitude." Ruggie screamed moving his hands wildly, everyone else around him other than Leona following his movements.

"you know what would happen to you back in my cut of the neighborhood Second born prince. You would be mugged and beaten to no tomorrow. So Leona, here comes trouble." he said darkly before a large burst of dark energy sent everyone back and kicked up large amounts of dust into the air.

"Overblott!" ace and deuce yelled when they got onto their feet. Mc watched and pointed in horror as some of the dust started to clear.

"Lilia! get the other students to safety and warn the faculty!" Riddle shouted to the fae nearby. he nodded and rushed through the dust to grab those injured, silver and sebek following quickly. Riddle, ace, deuce, grim, mc, and even Leona gathered and readied themselves as the negative energy settled over the field.

The dust settled and they heard multiple people laughing along with ruggies signature laughter, distorted and echoed through the now emptied playing field. Ace and deuce pale as they saw the incarnations of Ruggies blott separate from his body. Instead of one large monster usually behind him though, there were 3 regular-sized hyenas circling around the hyena boy, all giggling and laughing in an ominous way.

(ART IS NOT MINE! I found the art here! it was too perfect to not use)

"Bucchi, get a hold of yourself. idiot! you're going to get yourself killed!" Leona yelled at the raggedly clothed beastman.

"shishishishishihiihihihe! You think I care about that now?! I'm stronger than you leona. Always has been if you gave up and cried about something not going your way." The other hyenas around him laughed and started to stalk toward the group of students, the broken glass bottles they had for heads seemingly smirking at them.

"Snap out of it Ruggie! this is dangerous!" jack said getting into a fighting ready position.

"Shishishi. Poor little Frosh. It's too late to turn back now. Let's have some fun shall we fellas~" Ruggie cackled before launching a dark attack as the hyenas pounced. As the battle began dark music could be heard floating through the magically charged dust filled air. (song!!)

Ruggies voice echoes around: They say that I'm a nightmare Guess I'll catch you in your dreamsHe appears behind them from the dust: I come out of nowhere! I will haunt you in your sleep

He's now holding ADeuces magical pens: Yeah you should've known I'd never do what I'm told He tosses them behind himself smirking: I'm running in the fast lane Yeah I'm going rogue

The attacking bot monsters laugh and sing: "Here comes trouble Here comes trouble! Ruggie laughs as he dodges and swipes at riddle: I'm out of my cage You should be afraid Ruggie gets hit by one of Leona's spells and wipes at his cheek with a smile: Here comes trouble

Two of the hyenas sing and laugh as they circle: (La la-la la-la la-la la) hahahahaha!

He slinks behind the group before disappearing back into the dust: Catch me in the shadows Creeping around in your head He throws a flurry of spells as the blots all attack: got that bravado He makes a sliting throat motion: Watch me scare you dead

he gets multiple hits hit on Leona causing him to stagger: Yeah you should've known I'd never do what you've told he easily runs out of range as the other's spells dissipate behind him: I'm running in the fast lane Yeah I'm going rogue

Ace and grim are knocked down by the hyenas: Here comes trouble riddle is knocked back as he tries to dodge: Here comes trouble Ace and deuce suddenly walk next to Ruggie: I'm out of my cage He grabs their heads and slams them together, dropping them: You should be afraid

He launches them into the dust: Here comes trouble~ A hyena on his right shaking from laughter: (La la-la la-la la-la la) He takes a step forward: Trouble Hyena on his left shaking its head mockingly: (La la-la la-la la-la la) Ruggie smirks as the others take a step back: Trouble

:He tries to swipe jacks pen: Yeah, yeah, I do it like that he snaps his fingers, jack and grim freeze: I'm always on the attack he falls to the floor and the two follow: Lights out, fade to black the hyenas pounce on the two: Yeah, yeah, I do it like that I'm always on the attack he stumbles and laughs as he's hit again by Leona: Lights out, fade to black He screams as he flings his strongest attack: Here comes trouble! The other hyenas echoed his scream: Here comes trouble!

Hes starting to pant: Here comes trouble he flings more and more spells: I'm out of my cage he laughs with crazed eyes smile stretching:You should be afraid fangs bared as he continues his crazed attacking: Here comes trouble

Riddle and Leona advancing and deflecting his attacks: here comes, here comes Ruggie pulled at his smile in pain as its stuck abnormally large by blot running from both his eyes: Trouble the hyenas as they attack on the downed first years: (La la-la la-la la-la la) here comes, here comes Jack unleashing beast and protecting the others: Trouble Hyenas hit away by jacks beast form: (La la-la la-la la-la la) here comes, here comes Ruggie screams out as he stumbles from jacks final blow: Trouble The hyenas dissipate: (La la-la la-la la-la la) here comes, here comes Just as Ruggie passed out and the music cuts: Trouble-

[bylerismyjoy]

''Mike wont leave el for will"first of all, Is it confirmed? did mike wheeler told you in person? we see the mileven break up and byler argument in s3, Mike was eating chip and chit chatting to lucas about the "female species" in his basement after el literally dump him meanwhile Mike go chasing after will begging for forgiveness in the THUNDERSTORM after the byler argument in the SAME episode this shows that mike care for will more then el and would rather be with will then el if he can.

''the mileven break up scene was like silly so there is no point to compare it to the byler argument in s3'' the mileven break up scene was supposed to be ''silly'' for a reasons because I believe the duffers is showing us how much will and el mean to mike in a different way and was trying to hint us clues abt mike projecting or abt his small feelings for will because then why would both scene be in the same episode and why would they put el dumping mike if it were just silly anyway like what's the point for it? This really show that will means everything to mike more then any other person.

''if mike don't love el and love will instead then why cant mike break up with el and be with will?'' is the 80s obvly is hard for mike to come out to any person and he is scared and afraid if he comes out not a single person would accept him which will make mike not even coming out plus he is also trying to accept himself or realizing his feeling for will at the same time plus he also don't wanna hurt el feelings when coming out so it will basically take awhile for mike to come out to any of his friends or the others and I'm sure for this mike wasn't trying to lead el on purpose is just in the process of what he wasn't trying to do anyway.

(mb if this seem dumb or doesn't really make sense am bad at explaining and I will take this as a small byler evidences ig even if it aren't trying to be cuz why not I dont wanna get byler doubt😪😔)

[27emailsicantsend]

Season 3 Episode 5 Thoughts

I have to start out by saying that this episode had such a high impact on me that I literally was not able to write these notes until the next day… So yeah that should explain a lot about how great this episode was

Let’s start off with sassy Gina. I think it is so fantastic how much she is using little comments and remarks to get back to EJ. It reminds me a lot of the last episode and how he was making little side remarks against Ricky. It’s almost like her subconscious way of showing him what he was doing to Ricky when he was mad. She was going to lash back the same

CARLOS’ NAILS I LOVE SM

Ricky breaking the 4th wall again by making eye contact with the camera 😭 pls

Also why does it make so much sense that Carlos was literally the only person to pull off the drama stunt with the rest of the cast? Like he really understands what makes good tv and I love that for him

Also the writing in this episode was 😙👌🏻 it was funny, romantic, dramatic, confusing and fast and everything else. It kept you on your toes and felt engaging every step of the way. The writers REALLY stepped up their game this season and it’s making the season feel whole and complete. I think some other story lines could be slightly more fleshed out but with the time constraints they had it was still done well

Kourtney saying “RCOSL” and Carlos getting annoyed gives me the same vibe as London and Mosby with the “PRNDL”

The fact that Gina said she CANT improvise and then she was asked to improvise in WDYKAL tells me it might not have been improv at all. She wasn’t improvising, she was acting out in vengeance. Which remembered what happened last time she couldn’t improvise and acted out instead? Mr Elton John got a drink dumped on his head at the dance in S1

And I LOVE that there is a water dumping parallel when Gina gets “upset” at Kourtney over her lines and gets to throw it again

Tbh I feel like anyone in this fandom would be fine if Sofia threw water at them

EJ is here for the wrong reasons??? Remember why Carlos casts these? Because he felt like they matched people’s personalities. I think this is a big ole red flag for p*rtwell. He’s in Gina’s life- at camp- for the wrong reasons. Maybe it’s to hold onto his past, not go to school, whatever… but that tells us he shouldn’t be there loud and clear

Ricky “I can hit him fr” 😭😭 pls my guy no need to be so eager

Also it’s been pointed out a million and one times but RICKY SAID HE LOVES GINA IN A NOT SO SUBTLE WAY. Like NO HESITATION. The minute Carlos said Ricky was mad Ej took the girl he loves Ricky was like “oh right gina!!” And then had to come back from it because he realized how quick he responded 😭😭

“He stole her- or WOULD HAVE stolen her in a fake scenario” 🤪😳🫢

And the held a torch to her for YEARS?? Um hello this implies Ricky has had feelings since the beginning?? Which in many cases Ej and Nini saw in s1. Like the scene where they hugged or Ej asked if gina cared about Ricky. EJ knows the feelings have always been there

Ricky b*tch slapping EJ is EVERYTHING to me. I shouldn’t promote violence BUT

And then him saying that was his motivation and asking to slap him again I’m DEAD

FREAKING CARLOS PUSHING THE MADDOX AND JET IN LOVE AGENDA SIR YOU DONT UNDERSTAND WHY ITS SO WRONG

Also him doing labor breathing to calm down 😭 call the police

A parallel I just realized: when Kourtney and Carlos asked Gina and Ricky a question all they needed was one question to come completely clean about how they felt and what was stressing them. It’s interesting they responded the same way to their friends

“A big bouncy butt” who wrote these lyrics?? I just wanna talk

Like this whole episode was peak comedy but Channing and Carlos had me ROLLING the entire time. So so good 😂😂

Maddox’s squeal when she fake cries 😭 and then Carlos “IVE BEEN SLAPPED 😦” GOLD

When Gina and Ricky are talking backstage by Carlos you hear Gina do this little flirty “yeahhh 😏” and it’s very much giving the same vibes as them in the woods

Did anyone else notice that Ricky has the EXACT same look on his face when Carlos says, “remember you still have unresolved feelings for Gina” as when she brings up the chocolates?? (Yes I’m a chocolate truther sue me)

How does 10 to 1 mean peeing in Hollywood? 😗 am I missing something?

The evil look gina has when Carlos tells her to have fun torturing EJ 😭

AND THE SVEN COSTUME I CANT EVEN LOOK AT IT ITS SO FUNNY

Like literally I could use EJ in that costume as a reaction meme for SO MANY THINGS

Timberlina knew what he was doing with that costume and it was evil 😭

Ricky’s soft “hey buddy” ☺️ and EJ’s face 🥺 THIS EPISODE IS GOLD I TELL YOU

I AM AT WDYKAL NO ONE LOOK AT ME NO ONE PERCEIVE ME NO ONE MOVE

The way Ricky says in the song you don’t know his name?????? And then we find out Gina doesn’t actually know EJ’s name???? The Hans agenda are you kidding me?????

When Gina took his hat??

Or what about when she touched his neck??

WHEN THEY HOLD SILENT EYE CONTACT MULTIPLE TIMES ARE YOU KIDDING ME THE LOVE IS LITERALLY TANGIBLE IT HURTS. THE VERY END LITERALLY LEAVES ME BREATHLESS

Or how about the fact that Ricky dips her AFTER the little streamer shutters close and EJ can’t see what’s happening?

Or the slow touching moments

LETS NOT FORGET RIGHT AT THE END THAT IT LOOKS LIKE MR BOWEN IS ABOUT TO HOLD HER HAND AGAIN AND WHO HOLDS SOMEONE ELSES HAND AT THE END OF BREAKING FREE??? TROY TO GABRIELLA

And every person who has made the lights comparison is so so right and for what

Gina throwing Ricky around as a rag doll with no remorse and him enjoying it is EVERYTHING to me

ALSO DONT FORGET THIS WAS ALL SUPPOSED TO BE IMPROVISED. THEY DID THIS ON THEIR OWN, NO DIRECTION, JUST THEIR OWN NATURAL INCLINATIONS. JUST LET THAT SINK IN

The vocals, the choreo, the other actors reactions, the CHEMISTRY… everything about this song is literally so good. And it all built up to this??? Like it’s not out of nowhere but years of waiting and build up and at the end the tension is so high it literally causes Gina to run out of fear because she doesn’t know what else to do but panic???? Like hello???!!!

If you’re not on the Bird app or if you haven’t gotten a chance to listen to their vocals isolated please do it. It is so worth your time

This song really truly deserves every praise it’s received and will continue to receive. Timberly and the others really outdid themselves this episode and for what

(For rina, that’s what… this is what happens when the shows producer has a blatant favorite couple… sorry not sorry p*rtwell and r*ni duets don’t hold a candle to this one)

Did I just rewind it so I can watch it again before finishing the episode? Maybe. Don’t stop me.

Me talking about Rina: don’t get me started

“Heart wrenching honestly” 🥺🥺🥺 that really was so hard for him and you could see it the whole time in his performance he just wants to love Gina so badly ughhhhh

Ricky even apologized for being too intense? Like he knew he went full throttle in that performance because it probably was the only time he was allowed to without EJ saying something. I’m sure he took that opportunity and ran with it… no matter how painful

RICKY JUST SAY WHAT YOU FEEL WE’RE ALL BEGGING 😭😭

Also those were heart eyes if I’ve EVER seen them holy crap

I actually have a lot more I want to say on this scene but I want to make a separate post about it

THE PARALLEL SCENE OF THEM WALKING IN A ROOM IT ALL HURTS SO MUCH

this scene was so much because everything comes out in different ways and to have that many reveals in one sitting can be not overwhelming for the characters but the audience watching as well

Not Maddox just calling Ashlyn out like that 😭 but also she never denied it… so??? 😳🏳️‍🌈

I don’t know if this was supposed to be taken as a funny thing or not… But I find it really interesting that Ricky needed to lay down when Jet and Maddox were yelling so much of each other? It seemed like he was almost having some flashbacks to things that made him upset and his anxiety started to heighten reliving that trauma over again? Because not only did his parents fight like this but he also fought with Nini like this… it just seems like a trauma response for him to literally shut down so I’m not surprised he felt the need to lay down during all of that

But also on a lighter note it’s so funny how the kids are all yelling and everything is serious and then Carlos gets completely caught up on EJ not being Eric Junior and Ricky missing everything to yell about Maddox and jet being siblings completely out of context help 😭😭

And ok I’m not going to go TOO in on this because it’s been discussed a lot but there has been a lot of discussion around Ricky having regression (which is not true at all… look at other posts about this to get more context), but isn’t it interesting that Gina says OUTLOUD, “this is what the old Ej would do”. She is literally pointing out that him not being honest and hiding himself is a form of him regressing as a character. I’m really interested to see how the writers bring him out of this

I saw someone post about Ricky saying when you can’t find the words you just sing instead might be him hinting at singing Kristoffs lullaby and I LOVE THIS SM. But also I can’t tell what I would love more? If he is singing this off in a distance and pining at Gina or singing it to her 😭 both would be beautiful tbh

RICKY HAS A CRUSH ON GINA I STILL CANT BELIEVE THIS IS CANON ON SCREEN OUT LOUD ITS-

But also when he puts his head in his hands after getting caught speaking outloud. Like boy knows he done messed up. I am REALLY curious what they’re doing with that footage. Either Gina will see it on purpose, on accident, or it’ll get deleted but she’ll still find out anyway through word of mouth and I don’t care how but I love that somehow Ricky is gonna get CAUGHT

You can see he is trying SO HARD to avoid his feelings being known and he literally can’t. I think this is where the line from Val earlier about not being able to hide your love and it comes out in other ways comes in. He literally cannot keep others from seeing it and finding out which is frustrating him beyond belief. Enough people are seeing, noticing, saying things though that at this point… I’m sorry buddy there is nothing that can be hidden

Why does jet singing in that jacket at the piano remind me of the Gorilla from SING 😂😂😂

Bu that aside lmao I love this song. It’s implications with the kids around him and him looking with admiration at younger Maddox says a lot about their relationship. He just wants what is best for her through his actions and it showed so poorly. He feels so much regret even though he wanted to do everything right. Just a lot of misunderstanding and heart ache which I think sums up a lot of the relationships in this season as well

Ok who tf is EJ calling? I think it’s easy to assume it’s his dad but I don’t know that that is actually who he is calling and why? Is it to leave? Create more drama? Heal something that he feels or needs to be healed? I’m just very curious about who might be coming

[adachys]

having some thoughts about the end of shineva 3+1 😄 I can’t put everything into words properly but i really enjoyed this movie. it may not ave been perfect but i loved a lot of things about it. i dont expect anyone to read this i just wanna dump my thoughts even if it’s unorganized. this is not really anything you should take seriously and i may or may not repeat things I already said in this but my memory is very bad and i like to reiterate things. this is also my first attempt at posting on tumblr. the song below is what i was listening to while writing this terribly long “analysis”? “infodump”? whatever this would be called

first, about asuka

this scene in particular really stood out to me because we finally know why asuka acts the way she acts. shinji saying “i liked you too” was also pretty powerful because it shows his growth and they finally both moved on and she got closure. the curse of eva is gone.

shes always been a loner. in the rebuilds particularly, she is aware she is a clone of the true asuka. she’s convinced herself she doesn’t need anybody to help her. her mom was distant and her dad never there. when kensuke takes her in after shinji nearly causes the third impact, she’s finally accepted and loved for the first time. kensuke is the father figure she never had. mari also truly loved her for who she was as well, calling her pet names like princess and your highness. i thought that was sweet. honestly i dont have much to say about asuka right now but i love her anyway.

shinji (this one is long)

it was very moving when shinji finally reconciled with gendo. he finds out his father was just like him. he was on the path to being like gendo but instead of constantly grieving over kaworus death, he snaps himself out of it and finally accepts the fact. unlike gendo who eternally grieves over yui and cost all of earth to suffer for it. he couldn’t love shinji because he didn’t know how. he was so hyper focused on yui that it blinded him from what was important. that was his escape. in the part before they fight in the imaginary world, shinji cant go near him because of gendos AT field. he was afraid of his own son. skipping ahead because there’s so much to talk about, shinji abolishes all evangelions after saying farewell to rei and is alone sitting at the beach, but this time the ocean is restored to blue. he reconciled with everyone (gendo, asuka, rei, and kaworu). but something (someone) is missing. the animation decomposes to sketches. then an evangelion comes out of the water. mari falls out, and says something along the lines of “i told you I’d come back for you” (i dont exactly remember what she said) but at that moment everything returns to color and full animation. she came back for him as she promised. considering she’s a rebuild exclusive character she is the only one shinji doesn’t reminisce with. she represents moving on from the past, going to a new future.

ok so now for my train scene analysis. i admit i was not a fan of mari at first because i saw her as an unnecessary fanservice character that served nothing to the plot. as i explained just above there is more to her than was initially shown, even if she didn’t have much screentime. the picture above was very sad to watch(in a good way) though, she grabs shinjis hand and leads him to a new world, without evangelion. my interpretation is that this happens right after the beach scene. shinji wakes in a bench at a train station after the curse is completely lifted and he is an adult as he should be. on the other side of the tracks there is the original cast. the train has always been significant in the original series and the rebuilds too. it was shinjis way of escapism, to run away in his mind. this time around everyone is outside of the train, most likely representing he’s not gonna run away anymore, he has no reason to. as i said above, he wakes up immediately after the beach scene. so mari comes in and takes off his DSS collar, the symbol of his duty of piloting an eva and the weight of his “sin”. she puts it in her pocket, and i feel like thats her acknowledging his trauma but still accepting him as a person. they exchange a few lines. mari is by nature, flirtatious, and I believe shinji reciprocating that shows his growth, really. he is more confident than he was (unlike in NGE where he is kind of a wimpy pushover). so anyways, mari reaches out her hand. right now, theyre still in the anti-verse, hence the characters who have left are only just across the tracks. he wouldn’t have met them without the circumstances of eva. but shinji has already said goodbye and gladly takes mari’s hand to the outside of the station, where there is now footage of anno’s hometown. the message to the audience is that the true end of evangelion has finally happened and it is totally behind anno himself. whether or not the audience will put evangelion behind them is up to them. I know i wont be over this series anytime soon… and since this ending is up to interpretation i also want to believe that in the new universe shinji crosses path with his old friends again…

to end this shinji segment he is actually one of my favorite characters in the series and i relate to him to some degree (embarrassing moment…)

now about rei ayanami

she was definitely my favorite in this movie. the way she learned human emotion and hard work… the way she tried to think for herself instead of only doing what she was told… learning names of emotions and finding out who she is, i was broken when rei exploded into LCL. the note she left for hikari, “good night good morning thank you good bye” was just 😔💔😢😂😭👍

when she realizes she is running out of time, she goes to shinji, who has yet to overcome his emotions at a place that was formerly NERV(if I remember correctly). she asks him if he has thought of a new name for her and he says “you’ll always be ayanami”. she is content with this answer. one of her final words are “i wanted to spend more time with the boy i loved”. this is shinji. earlier asuka told her the ayanami series is programmed to love the ikaris and want to take care of them. rei doesn’t mind this either. I will always love rei and she didn’t deserve any of this…

now about kaworu

he is easily one of the most misunderstood characters in evangelion. people see him as manipulative but in reality he is the opposite. he is the only one who told shinji he loved him. at first, when he fell in love with shinji, that was him falling in live with humanity. shinjis fragile nature and heart, as an alien kaworu knew nothing of human emotions. shinji helped him realize what they were. his sacrifice and taking on shinjis first DSS choker was proof of this. in the original TV series, kaworu does a similar sacrifice so shinji can save humanity, but thats something for another day…his character is emphasized in 3+1 as well and i will talk about it.

in his confrontation scene, shinji speaks to kaworu on the dream train. kaworu notices how shinji has changed and shinji says that he can handle pain and heartbreak now. he won’t cry anymore and let himself be weighed down by the past. the scene then cuts to the beach where they first met, with shinji saying he knows this is a significant place, even if doesn’t remember meeting him there for the first time. kaworu says he is just like shinji. shinji says then that means you’re like my father. that line confused me a bit, but then I realized kaworu and shinji parallels gendo and yui. kaworu went through time and time again to make sure shinji could be happy. like how gendo hoped to attain instrumentality and reunite with yui in a better world. (Honestly i have some events mixed up in the wrong order but that doesn’t change much) kaworu then says their names are in the book of life so they’ll keep on meeting again and again. kaji appears to talk to kaworu and says that kaworu wanted shinjis happiness so he could be happy. after talking for a bit, kaworu appears to shinji near their piano room and tells him he is sorry. he misunderstood his happiness. as a kawoshin shipper…. I am happy with this type of closure. kaworu learns that shinji doesn’t need to be dependent on him for them to love each other and that his own self fulfillment should come first before devoting himself to someone else. I’m coping so hard right now..!!

i think i wrote enough for now… i have a lot of thoughts and theres more i wanna say… but this should be fine.

[silverrstarrr]

Headcanons of Eren with a Black s/o!🍡

(Happy black history month babes! Remember blm isn't just in this month but all year long :p)

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys most likely met in your high school years.

• I feel as if Eren would stare a lot at you during freshman year. Not in a bad way but in a Curious/adoring way. I mean all his friends are white lmao💀

• He probably approached you during a class period you guys have together.

• I don't think he would be ignorant? But he'll most likely ask to touch your hair.

• Maybe you have braids, locs, or passion twist or your natural curls out/4c Afro—doesn't matter, he'll ask to touch your hair.

• Of course you can decline and tell him no, he won't really fuss over it. He'll even apologize.

• But trust me, he's going to keep staring 😭 he thinks you're really pretty, don't worry ;)

• He won't care about your Skintone/shade, lightskin, brownskin, dark-skinned. He likes them all, I don't see Eren ever have a preference in girls in general.

• Whoever he likes, he likes.

• You guys hit it off in your freshman year.

• He'll ask a lot of questions about you and your culture and your hair

"Hey, why do you wear braids??"

"Is your hair really this long? Wow 😁"

• PLEASE LMAO, I TAKE THESE AS AN INSULT BUT I KNOW HE'S JUST HE CURIOUS 😭

• You'll have to explain to him about your hair.

• You guys most likely snapped and he sent a streak of him getting out the shower and his hair is wet.

• You'll go on about how you can't wash your hair everyday, that you have a certain wash day and his reaction is like "😲"

• Poor baby is like "woooow" and ever since then, he's been hook up to learn about your lifestyle, your family, cookouts, etc. He just wants to know you.

• He calls you pretty a lot.

• Not in a flirtatious way just because he thinks YOURE really pretttyyyy. He's just stating the obvious queen🙄❗

• He offered to go to the Beauty supply store once or twice to buy your weave/pick out the next color. Or he'll just accompany you.

• Also would pick out your next nail color, maybe hairstyle.

• He doesn't care if you wear lakefront, wigs, braids, or natural. He believes they're all beautiful. Plus he understands that our hair need protective hairstyles and can't really, yjehehejehwhww iykyk.

• During BHM, he would do the mossstt.😭

• He'll buy you food and buy you hairproducts.

• He'll constantly post about African American stories on his social media.

• Talked Armin into making a poem about discrimination and racism then made him read out loud to you in the hallway😭

• Would buy a BLM shirts for him Mikasa and Armin.

"Look y/n! We're supporting your people. Remember we're on your side. BLM!!"

• IM CRACKLING TOO MUCH LMAOOOO.

• Don't worry, he's has the right attitude but mann💀

• Depends on the type of person you are: you probably confronted them and told them to relax. Or, you dealt with it and the embarrassment 😭

• You most likely ask him for Reparations 🙄❗🤞

• He deadass would give you them.

• He'll be confused at first and probably wouldn't  even understand the word 💀

• But he'll give you money though LMAO.

This was 15 year old Eren, moving on to when he's older.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

• You guys are older. You've been introduced to the rest of his friend squad. Jean, Connie, Marco, sasha etc.

• Jean most definitely thinks you're pretty and fell for you at first sight. Eren didn't like this at all.

• Eren never really understood why he didn't like it when Jean played in your braids. Eren then started to purposely make you lay between his legs so he play with your braids before Jean could.

• They probably reacted the same as Eren about regarding your hair.

• Eren would take it upon himself to explain and even tell them about Lace fronts, sew ins, braids, etc

• He'll probably show off about  how much he knows about your hair.

• Eren would ask to help you with your hair.

• He most likely looked up YouTube videos about how to plate hair or how to deal with your hair type in general.

• You could probably teach him. He wouldn't understand the first time but with practice, he's pretty good. Not better than you though 🙄🤞❗

• Carries Hair ties, brushes and combs on him just for you.

• You also carry hair ties for him because of his long hair.

• You're the person who even puts his hair into that sexy ahh man bun🤨❗

• Most likely help you on wash day. Massages oil into your scalp.

• Supplies you with hairproducts.

• Likes it when you play in his hair. During PE, you guys would sit on the bench. Him between your thighs relaxing as you caress his hair.

• You guys look so cute and perfect while doing this. Connie and Sasha would always tease you about being Eren's gf.

• Loves your food! Like literally, he's in love with it.

• During the summertime, you invited him to a cookout. A lot of your family members stared at him but you know, they're accepting and gave him some food, chatted him with etc.

• Ever since then, he would always ask your mom to come over for dinner or save him a Plate lmao😭

• Sometimes if you were to cook, he'll be in the kitchen watching you

"Why are you watching me?"

"I wanna watch you so I can learn to cook your food and surprise you one day with it."

"Suurree but you can't out-cook me."

• He'll then smirk and accept that challenge.

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

Sorry I just realized I've only been talking about yall friendly part, lemme get into more intimacy 🥲

• He always have his hands on your hips, waist or ass.

• Maybe you're cuddling in the library or something, his hands are on your ass.

• Black women naturally have curvy bodies In my opinion. And curvy can mean thick, skinny or in the middle. They're still curves.

• He loves kissing your lips. Either that or your neck.

• When you're walking together he always have his hand around your waist.

• Eren seems like the type to hug you from behind and kiss the top of your head.

• I dont think he's big on PDA but that doesn't mean he won't do it.

• You're talking to Jean? Wraps his arms around your waist from behind and places his head on your shoulder- kissing your neck.

• If you so happen to have thay dump trunk in the back, he'll always caress it, give it a pat or smack it. But in the most sly way ever.

You're in the hallway, chatting up with Jean. You guys are discussing the topics of what was recently covered in class. Jean cracks a joke about how the teacher was talking and their looks. You laugh at the small insults he was throwing at your professor. Eren recently just left his class a few doors down from where you and Jean was. He notices your long box braids from down the hall and sees a tall male walking alongside with you. Eren quickly caught up with you guys. As he walked passed you, his hands slides over and grabs a good squeeze from your ass. Naturally you wouldn't mind but for some reason you got embarrassed and flustered. Most likely it was because Jean was there. Before you could respond  and complain to him, he leans over and places his lips against yours. Obviously, you kiss him back as his free hand grabs your chin, deepening the kiss. It was passionate. The kiss was probably to make up for his sudden actions but it was also because he missed your presence and touch. The way your lips felt against his own, his hands grasping and holding your hips rolled, everything. Jean rolled his eyes,

"Okay lovebirds, I get it." You break away from Eren with a small smile. You turn towards  Jean with an apologetic look, since he did just kiss you in the middle of a conversation.

Jean nodded and said his goodbyes, he'll catch up with you another. Watching as his figured faded within the crowd, you turn towards Eren and smack his arm. He let out an "ow" in response.

"Eren, what was that for? I usually don't mind it but we were chatting."

He lets out a soft groan and buries his head into your neck. He released the grip on your rear and just lays it there as his other hand slips down and does the same. You tap his back and he raises his head from it's previous position. You give him a few quick pecks, wrapping your arms around his neck, he quickly to returns the small kissed back. You both smile at one another, letting out a small giggle.

"Its okay baby, I miss you too." You peck his cheek for the last time.

"We can walk home together after school, meet me at my last period class." 

Eren face brightens up when you say those words. Mann, this boy was in love. The bell rang and you notice all the kids scrambling to get to class. He releases his arms from you and grabs your hand as you both scurry along to your next period class.

He drops you off and waves at Armin and Marco that happens to be in your last period.

"Remember your promise y/n!!" He said as he walked off to the direction of his class.

You rolled your eyes jokingly and settled in to class.

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Okay bonus:

I feel as if Eren would talk you into making those tik toks that beautiful darkskin/brownskin woman do with makeup and their cute ass hair. Of course you'll end up doing it because he kept hyping yo ass up and wouldn't let it down.

The video actually goes viral and gets a decent 345k likes with 1.1m views. Some of the kids in school  came across the video and started chatting up with you. Even some guys you never knew before started to hit you up but Eren gets so Jealous and has you hold his hands always in the halls 😭

Okay thank you loves! Please request/suggest things for him. I don't mind doing one of these for Jean, Connie, etc. Next up are my jjk men 🤨❗

[yikesharringrove]

Changing the theme a bit, since I saw you dont hate Jonathan thank goddd, maybe Jonathan having to ask Steve and Billy for tips because he's aro or ace? Or something he knows Lonnie wouldve actually killed him for, which Billy gets and Steve is fully willing to help soft Jonathon be a THING and they are just his gay mentors and mayhaps. Nancy just doesnt get it and it gets messy and Will just stands up for his brother in full anger and slams the door in her face and hugs jon so tight he falls

Steve is sex-positive ace, Billy is sex-repulsed, and Jon is greyace bc I’ve gotten so many messages about how many people were affected positively by showing ace diversity in that one drabble I wrote, so we’re keeping this goin’ because you’re ALL VALID. 😤

-

Jonathan had been crashing on their couch for a week and a half and has yet to say anything about the situation more than Nancy and I had a fight.

Billy and Steve didn’t know what the fuck to do about it. Jonathan was obviously fucking heartbroken over whatever the fight had been about, but they didn’t wanna pry.

“Thank you guys for taking me in. I’m sorry, I’ve probably been cramping your style.” Steve just shook his head, serving three plates of eggs and toast.

“There’s not a lot of style going on in this apartment for you to cramp.” Steve smiled at him as he placed the plates on the table. Jonathan gave him an odd look.

“What do you, what do you mean?”

“We don’t really fuck.” Billy was always the blunt one. Jonathan’s fork clattered to the table.

“You don’t, why not?”

“Neither of us are really into it.” Jonathan looked like he could fucking cry.

“Me neither. That’s what the fight was. Nancy kept asking why we don’t have sex, and if I stopped loving her, and I do! I love her so much, but I just, sometimes I feel that way about her, but I usually don’t, and I’m so fucking confused.” Steve reached out, placing a firm hand on Jonathan’s arm.

“Jon, it’s okay. I mean, I don’t think we’ve had sex in like, a year?” Billy nodded.

“It was before we actually talked about how we both felt about it.”

“And is that-” Jonathan trailed off, but they got it. Is that like me.

“I don’t mind sex. If I’m with someone who wants to have it, I can be cool with that, but I don’t always get off, and it’s more about making the other person feel good, or using it as another way to be like, intimate. But I don’t really think about it, and I can definitely go without.”

“I actively don’t like fucking. I kinda think sex is, is fucking gross. I mean, you do you and all that, but like, every time I had sex it just, it made me feel gross.” He pulled a face.

“I just, I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel for her, honestly.” Jonathan ran a hand down his face. “Sometimes, sometimes it just feels like a fucking chore. And she just, she kinda confronted me about it, and I probably could’ve worded it better, but she got so angry, and hurt, and we just, we decided to take some time apart.” He pushed the eggs around his plate. “And there are some situations that I just, I want it with her so badly, but most, most of the time I just, I just want to be with her, like just spend time with her. And she, she’s never been very good at being sensitive about things, or, or, sympathetic, and she just, she made me feel fucking broken. Like there was something wrong with me.”

“First of all, fuck her for making you feel like that.” Billy had one eyebrow raised.

“Bill-”

“No. Jonathan, you are not broken, and it sucks she made you feel that way. If she can’t be in a relationship that respects your boundaries, then she is not the one.”

Steve sighed.

“Jon, Bill’s right. A relationship should be safe. She should be more mindful of your boundaries and feelings, and should not be making you feel bad for those things. I’m not saying you should like, dump her-”

“I am.” Steve batted a hand at Billy.

“-but, if you have an open conversation with her, and nothing changes, then you are always welcome here.” Steve squeezed his arm again.

-

The talk with Nancy had been bad.

She had taken everything really personally, said that Jonathan needed to sort out his priorities and to let her know when he’s attracted to her again.

And he tried, he tried so hard to explain the way he felt, that it all comes and goes like the fucking tide, but she had put her foot down.

So he showed up back to Billy and Steve’s apartment with two more suitcases and tears in his eyes.

“I just, I know I can fake it when I need to, I don’t know why I didn’t.”

“Because forcing yourself to do shit like that sucks. Fuck Nancy for being a bitch. Figure yourself out, and then find someone who respects your boundaries.”

Billy was pacing in front of the sofa, talking sharply, pointing at Jonathan a lot. Steve had one arm over his shoulders.

“You deserve respect, Jon. And you deserve to feel safe and happy in a relationship.”.

-

He couldn’t sleep that first night.

The fight was circling in his head, over and over and over and over-

He heard the bedroom door open, and someone creep out through the living room and into the kitchen.

He looked over the back of the couch, saw a bleary eyed Steve filling a glass of water for himself, wearing one of Billy’s faded band shirts, and a pair of panties.

Jonathan laid back down before Steve could see him looking.

-

The next morning, he found himself staring at Steve.

He had put shorts on, and even a chunky cardigan while he made breakfast, but Jonathan knew.

“Can I, can I talk to you about something?” Steve smiled brightly at him. “I, um, I noticed you coming out here last night.” Steve just nodded, a look of recognition in his eyes.

“You wondering about panties?”

“Um, yeah.” Steve shrugged. “I just like ‘em. And it’s not like, a sexual thing. Sometimes they make me feel sexy, but that’s not what it’s about. I just like them. Have a lot of women’s thing.”

“What about them do you like?” Steve shrugged again.

“It’s hard to describe. I’ve never felt like, super masculine. Like, big macho tough guy, I wanna hunt and never talk about my feelings.” Steve put on a stupid-sounding deep voice for his macho man. “And I mean, not all men are like that, but that’s kind of how you’re expected to be. And women are expected to be pretty and delicate, and I’ve always related to that more. Women’s clothes help me feel that way.”

“I’ve, um, I’ve always felt that too. Not necessarily the kinda, pretty and delicate part, but the, not feeling connected to masculinity and like, what’s expected from you.” Steve set down a plate of eggs and bacon in front of Jonathan, putting one down for himself as well, and one in Billy’s empty space.

“Hold that thought, I’m gonna grab Billy. He doesn’t like it when I yell for him.” Steve patted him on the arm, and was gone for a few minutes before he returned with Billy in tow.  “Okay, Jonathan. Please continue.”

“Well, not much to say. I feel like my dad kinda always shoved that like, macho man shit on me. Would take me hunting and stuff and I just never liked it.”

“Jesus, mine did that shit too. Not with hunting, but he was all about men having their place, and women having their place.” Billy took an aggressive bite of his bacon.

“Mine was too! I got sad once when I shot a rabbit, and he called me a pussy for like, a week.”

“When my dad was layin’ into me, if he ever saw my cry, it would just get that much worse.” They were nodding at one another, trading shitty dad stories back and forth. “He would like, get mad if I helped my mom cook and shit, too.”

“God, it’s like we had the fuckin’ same dad.” Billy raised his mug at Jonathan. “It’s hard to break outta that shit, even though he’s not in your life, anymore.”

“I think so, too. I haven;t seen him in years, but every time I do something he would’ve thought was too soft, I can still hear him in my head. And you know, that’s one of the things I like about Nancy. She’s really hard, and tough, and never expected me to be that way.” And he knows that in the end, Nancy was bad news for him, not being able to love and accept him, but that aspect of their relationship was so nice, so easy.

“There doesn’t always have to be both. I mean, Steve’s more outwardly soft, but we’re both real mushy at our cores. There doesn’t have to be a big tough one and a sweet soft one. Sometimes you have elements of both and you make it work.”

“You just have to find the balance within yourself, I think. And learn to embrace the parts of you that are soft and the parts that are hard.” Jonathan was nodding vigorously at Steve. “And it’s always different. I love getting to feel soft and pretty in a dress or something, whereas Billy finds ways to be soft by taking care of things, like me and all the plants.”

“Do you think, do you think you could help me? Find that, I mean.”

“Of course! Just think of the things you already feel, things that feel right when you do them, and that’s a good starting point. And maybe that’s your photography, and maybe it’s something else.”

So they let Jonathan experiment with things to find his softness.

He would help Billy tend to the fucking garden they had on the balcony, or bake with Steve. He took a million pictures, and Steve was thriving under the camera, would put on make up and something pretty and pose around the apartment.

It was just nice.

Getting to live with these two, and train himself not to be ashamed, it was nice.

Will would come and visit quite often, and he and Jonathan spent a wonderful Saturday evening coming out to each other, and validating the ever loving shit out of one another.

Billy and Steve came home to the two brothers hugging one another on the couch and trying to hold back tears.

Steve had inserted himself into the hug while Billy patted each one of them on the head and started making dinner.

But he figured of course this would happen.

His perfect little cocoon would crumble apart at some point.

Will had come over, and Steve and Billy had gone out to dinner together, leaving the two of them to order pizza and have a movie night.

It was great, hanging out with his brother like when they were little, not a fucking care in the world.

There was a knock at the door.

“Jon, it’s me. It’s Nancy. Can we talk” Jonathan’s heart stuttered to a halt in his chest.

Will was staring at the door like maybe he could set it on fire if he glared hard enough.

Jonathan sighed, opening the door to face his fate.

“Are you seriously still mad at me?”

“Yes.” She huffed.

“C’mon. Come back home.”

“Nancy, I can’t. Not if you’re not going to respect me.”

“We were fine. I don’t know why we can’t just go back to the way we were-”

“Because I was forcing myself to do things I was uncomfortable with just to make you happy.”

“Relationships are compromise, Jonathan.”

“I know that, but when I brought up to you what wasn’t working, you refused to listen. I was the only one forfeiting my boundaries and comfort in that relationship, and I deserve more.” She rolled her eyes.

“Jesus Christ, Jonathan, this is-” Will was shoving Jonathan back, stepping between the two.

“Nancy, he’s done talking to you about this. Unless you can respect that he doesn’t always feel that way, then move the fuck on.” He slammed the door right in her face. “You don’t need her.”

Jonathan was gobsmacked. Will had never spoken to anyone like that, at least not that Jonathan’s every seen.

“Why did you...?” He trailed off, still staring at the door.

“She was pissing me off. You’re right. You compromised everything in that relationship and she couldn’t even give you the bare minimum.”

Jonathan swept Will up, hugging him as tight as he possibly could.

“Thank you.”

“You deserve better than her.”

“Yeah, I do.”

[camelely]

13rw S4 Fix

 So i did one of these for last season and I think now that I’ve had some time to think about S4 I’ll do the same. While last season I thought the issue was one character being overused. But here it seems like there were multiple smaller things that could have improved the whole season Again I’m keeping the same basic plotline and characters :) 

1) Winston 

Have Winston stay at Hillcrest. Him moving to Liberty did nothing for the main plot and he was basically a red herring through most of it. Let him try are befriend the characters from the outside. He can learn about Jess from Bryce’s trial and the news coverage and then try to befriend her at Monet’s. This is where he meets and later starts to date Alex. Since he doesn’t go to liberty school Alex sees him as a sort of escape and lets him in. Clay and Ani dont tell everyone about him because they dont know he is trying to get close to them. It makes them seem less like assholes and more like people. They don’t mention his connection to Monty because they dont realize how close he is getting to answers. Clay can still suspect he did the graffiti, after all it was a break in and a non student could have done that. Plus Estella is another red herring in the school. She serves that purpose so let Winston be the outsider looking in. His arc would still be about knowing a different Monty and not knowing who is was at Liberty but now he is literally the outsider who didn’t really get Monty, rather than it just being a figurative thing at the prom. You can still have the prom scene it would just be entirely imagined rather than the half imagined thing they went with. I think they overused the people talking to ghosts thing so here it would be a  fantasy of Monty and the relationship they had rather then a representation of what could have been. However I don’t think this would have retracted from the point. Also play him up, he is a sympathetic antagonist and it sucks how much he is sidelined for Diego. I didn’t hate Diego but Winston and him basically went through the same arc. They were pro Monty and ending up dating a member of the group, couldnt believe that member was involved and then learned something about Bryce and Monty agreed to move on and just did. All while saying they will alway care for that member of the group. It was an unnecessary rehash. Having WInston be the outsider looking in and Diego the insider looking out also lets their characters compliment each other. They should still work together, just have Winston contact him looking for Monty’s friends. It’s simple. 

2) Tyler and Tony 

Oh Tyler. The character who seems to be in the middle of everything despite never doing anything himself. I didn’t mind his arc of helping the cops find the guys who sold the illegal guns. But Tony’s suspicions, eventually leading to Clay and Tony finding out the truth and just moving on never really go anywhere. I think  it would be cool if Tyler tells Tony, despite the cops telling him not to tell anyone, because he trusts Tony. But Tony, who has had bad run ins with the cops, thinks it is a bad idea. He doesn’t want Tyler taking the deal. Tyler says its the only way the guns wont be traced back to them but Tony thinks teh cops are planning to double cross them to mind out more about Bryce and Monty. At the same time he starts getting close to that cop that takes him boxing and helps him get into college (i dont remember his name for the life of me lol). Tyler sees this as being hypocritical and pulls away. Tony still suspects Tyler is behind the lock down because he is pulling away and Tony is getting paranoid. The rest of their story can still be the same but this way they can show Tony’s paranoia and his loyalty. 

As for Tyler and Estella, It was fine. The scene of them in the bathroom was really powerful, being in the bathroom with a de la cruz and becoming comfortable because isnt her brother was really nice. This could even be another reason Tony and Tyler fight. Tony can be paranoid that Tyler is trusting her too quickly and think she will turn on him. 

3) Jess

Her arc with the principal, being scared and agreeing with the security measures before she sees them in action was really interesting. Focus more on it and less on her manipulating Diego. I did like parts of that arc for her so I don’t want it completely gone but I do think focusing on her working with the principal would have been cool. I would call more attention to her first meeting and her agreeing with the measures and slowly show her change her mind and start to turn against them. Maybe even have an early scene of her and ANi talking about it and have Jess admit she feels safer. Move the creepy cop trying to pat her down to the second or third day. So she can have a moment where they make her feel safe before the negative experience. I loved the protest and a bit better build up would have made it amazing

Her arc with Ani. They fought over Bryce... It should have been a conversation. Not a moment where Ani judges Diego and then they argue. I still think this arc should have been Chloe and Jess and should have been in last season. But they had the opportunity to include Chloe this season and just didnt. I’ll talk about this a bit more in the Zach section but I think Chloe should have been at Prom and the moment between the Ani Jess and Chloe should have been then. It would be right after Jess and Ani made up and would have been cool. 

I don’t think she should have had scenes where she saw and talked to Bryce. Yes it created some powerful moments but they could be reworked. Have WInston use his wealth to commission a positive thing in the paper about Bryce and Monty and have her talk to his idealized photo of Bryce. I will mention it in the Clay section but her hallucinations detracted from his journey with mental health. 

4) Clay

Okay two thing here the first is his arc with mental health, hallucinations, and blackouts. They used it for drama and I wish they hadnt. It should have been about him healing. I didnt mind the way they handled the realization for clay that it was him doing everything (Did they explain the symbol he kept drawing because I missed it if they did? or i just forgot because it was that forgettable lol) but I think the whole thing could have been handled a lot better and a more educated fan then I can provide a better explanation for what exactly was off about it. I will say the the therapy sessions were repetitive and I know thats realistic but for a tv show its boring. The scene were Clay goes to his home was weird and low key scary. I understand the purpose but  I wish he had called him and asked to meet at his office instead. A more likable and relatable journey for Clay with his mental health would be really good for a show that was accused of glorying suicide (personally i dont think it did. My inbox is open if you wanna talk though :))

The second thing is the phantom phone caller. I hate this trope so it might just be me but this is so stale. There are exactly two ways it could go. The person could know everything and be a real problem or the person could be fishing for information and not be a real problem. The whole thing was predicable since Winston had red herring written all over him, Estella was barely developed, and on this show it is always the football guys. Instead let the pranks be smaller and less crazy. Like these boys had to coordinate a lot to mess with Clay. There should be more than one prank and end with a Monty doll and Clay holding a knife to set up the camp episode. But they should be pranks, not the phantom caller psychological torture bs. The blood shower can also happen just on a different day. Clay can be confused about what is real and what isnt making him even more worried about his blackouts and again assuming the mental health arc is handled well, the pranks can be a real part of it. Dumping him in the pit on the camping trip also seemed kinda attempted murdery so maybe do something like tie him to a tree of the path or in a small dirt ditch not a rocky pit where if he hit his head or fell weird the team would all be murderers. 

5) Alex

His arc with Charlie was one of my favorite stories this season. I was also not bothered by him getting close to and exploring his sexuality with Winston and Zach. I’m in the minority but I’m glad Zalex wasn’t made canon and Zach was used to be an effective (kinda) ally and good friend. Plus this way Zalex can live on in the fandom untouched or ruined by the writers interpretation. 

They should have given us Alex in therapy. He tried to kill himself had a traumatic injury, an arc with steroid abuse, and an arc about killing someone. All of which were forgotten this season. All the other characters seemed to be dealing with Bryce and Monty, why not focus on Alex? Even if it isnt in therapy just let him exist in his feelings.

6) Zach

I have one major issue with Zach’s arc, the lack of Chloe. She was the reason he almost killed a man. Let them date, let him start to spiral while dating her. She doesnt know what he did. Have them grow apart on screen but her still connecting to him and not wanting to give up on him. They should go to prom together. I know the hooker was supposed to represent Zach turning into Bryce with the hookers and the drunken sex/potential rape  and cocaine. But Chloe fills the same comparison. He brings cocaine she is not okay with it, He tries to convince her to have sex in the back she is not having it. Maybe he tries to convince maybe it becomes a bit worse than that but she breaks up with him at prom and leaves early. She sees Bryce in him, she doesnt have to say it but you can see it on her face and she walks away when her mind and heart tells her to this time no making excuses. Boom Chloe actually has an arc. As for Zach this is a big wake up call for him he sees what we had become. I know it is later in the actual show but I think it should be in the prom episode so he can have a better conclusion in the finale, like the other characters. The whole season was a downward spiral and I wish we got to see more of him pulling himself out of it. If the whole finale is him getting better even though he wont be all the way done he will be in a better place up the end.

7) Justin

Okay the hard one. I think the writers really wanted to kill him. I mean a fan favorite, who did bad things, and the death would be in the series finale. this is a tv writer’s drug of choice. So I’m gonna do a fix where I still kill him first then to the ideal version. Ok so first Justin dies. No HIV/AIDS. It was out of nowhere, unneeded, and seemed a bit insensitive. If you want it to be related to his drug use, make it so he got a bad batch when he relapsed. Or maybe organ failure. If it doens’t need to be drug related it can be an accident or someone he knew on the streets getting revenge, like that drug dealer we spent time with last season. Or if Justin helps Tyler put the gun salesmen behind bars then have it be retaliation for that. He can still go to the hospital and have goodbyes but it wont be an aids diagnosis and death in the same episode. I know they had signs in earlier episodes but the timeline is still really fucked up...

An ideal ending would have him live. He can still pass out at Prom. The diagnosis can be a combination of stress and withdrawal symptoms.He can be the red herring for the person in the coffin. If Justin lives he can represent hope. He can show the audience that you can get better and things can work out. Even if you are sick and think you will die you can do better be better and live in a better world. Plus I love him and really wanted him to be happy. The message would be you can get out of a bad situation and wold have ended a sad series on a positive note. Even if you are a bad person. Even if you have bad circumstance. Even if it feels like the world is against you, it can get better if you put in the effort. Which felt like the message the show was going for in eariler seasons by showing the people on the tapes doing better but abandoned this last season.

So who would I put in the coffin. Ani’s mom. Now I know she wasn’t a well liked character and her mom wouldn’t have the same audience or character reaction Justin’s death did. But this version isn’t about making the audience sad. Ani would finally have a plot that was really about her, her mom died, Bryce’s mom basically wants to provide for her. And she isn’t sure what to do. Justins funeral felt like it was overshadowed by graduation anyway. Now Ani’s moms absence and the funeral being overshadowed both make sense. She is going to college and doing what she can to honor her mom. And the death of a parent causes Clay to immediately appreciate his own family more. The theme in the first season with Clay was appreciating and acting on his feelings for Hannah before she was gone. Ani’s mom dying is a reality check for him and he know the most important things are his family and friends. Justin’s arc was about finding a family and he did. The core of the show is about family, friends, and the importance of  a strong support system. And starting it with a mother grieving her daughter and ending it with a daughter grieving her mother would be a cool full circle moment.

This post is really long so if you read all the way down Thank you! :) 

[aizawa-needs-coffee]

Hi!! Could I have a matchup please? I'm 18, pronouns she/her, I'm fine w any gender though I have a preference for males

If its of any relevance, physically I'm about 5'8 tall and on the chubby side, green eyes, brown hair (with blonde streaks) and I wear glasses

If you're into astrology/ mbti, I am a Sagittarius w both moon and rising in Cancer and I'm INFP

So I'm quite emotional lol. Usually very in touch with my emotions and quite perceptive of other's feelings as well. I have a huge saviours complex especially when it comes to feelings (i love helping others figure out their feelings, being a shoulder to cry on or even offering comforting hugs) but I try my best to keep it control cause I don't wanna be suffocating

On the outside I'd say I'm fairly organized, I keep my room clean and all of that, I'm a lil bit of a perfectionist but mentally I'm all over the place. I tend to get carried away by thoughts and emotions and end up procrastinating a lot; anxiety makes it all worse. In short, I suck at time management

To most people I may seem quiet and reserved but I actually really enjoy talking to people; I'm really insecure about not being funny or interesting enough tho. Around my friends I'm more relaxed but still have moments of self doubt

I can also be quite obsessive. If something really catches my interest I won't stop until I search all there is to know about it. For example I watched bnha, read the manga, the spin offs etc all in less than a month and now I'm indulging in fanart and fanfics because I need m o r e c o n t e n t hsbsb. I'm also that kind of person that listens to a new song they like on repeat until they hate it. Speaking of music, I can't say I have a taste lol. My fave genres are rock, pop and indie but I hear smth I like, I listen to it, whether its "high quality" music, basic or weird. Lately I've been listening to a lot of epicore which is literally the type of music thats used in fantasy and sci fi movies askfkdk

I like expressing myself through writing, singing and dancing but I really can't say I'm talented at either of those, it's all in good fun. I also enjoy reading (fiction, non-fic books bore me like hell; my fave genres are fantasy, sci fi and crime) but I haaate literature in school. I'm actually a bit of a math nerd and this year I'm starting uni, studying computer science!! Oh! I've also taken drama classes for 2 years (despite the fear I loved being on stage and plan on starting again once I'm done w the baccalaureate), I love playing D&D and while I woulnd't quite call myself a gamer, I love role playing video games. I'm also almost always down for any kind of multiplayer video games w friends although I have no experience

I'm not a sportive person, I go on walks or do a few exercises every now and then at home but I'm willing to try stuff out like a new sport or going to the gym w an s/o. I do plan on starting self defense classes soon and maybe taking up sword fighting (I love swords hehe)

Tbh I've never been in a relationship so I'm not really sure how I would act w an s/o, nor what I'm exactly looking for. I best express my affection through physical touch tho and that includes my friends so I'd like someone who isn't bothered or can get used to that (s/o would still receive the most hugs/ cuddles etc). I'm not that comfortable w the other love languages for friends and family, but I think I'd be a lot more eager to express my love through them for s/o. If I'm on the receiving end, my weakness is still physical touch :)) but I also need words of affirmation every now and then cause insecurities 🌠 and while I wouldn't ask for anything, especially objects, I am a hoarder and I'd keep any kind of gift like its a national treasure simply bc its from someone I love.

In addition, it doesn't really matter if s/o is more on the emotional or rational side a long as they dont invalidate my feelings; it angers me a lot and makes me feel even more insecure. I tend to isolate when I'm really really upset about something so I need a lil bit of pushing to talk abt it; I'm open to talk abt my feelings but I need the verbal confirmation that they care and wanna help, its not just cause they're being nice

Wow that is a lot of rambling jeez ajsjsjs sorry. Thank you so much if you've read throught that all and ty for the match up!!

Me and my wife literally having a ten minute debate on who we’d pair you with before I made my choice. Thanks for all the details and I hope you enjoy the match up!

I match you with Sero

I feel he’s outgoing and extroverted enough to help you with your anxiety and always reassure you that you are good at things and he does love you, he’s also so chill and laid back that even if you were clingy he’d not mind, he’d embrace it, his chill nature would help balance you. He would help you feel grounded and have a ‘you don’t have to do it all now’ attitude but would happily help you out. You need help going to the store? He remembers the list you wrote, having trouble fitting in lunch while you study? He’ll come to your door with pizza.

He’s determined and outgoing but isn’t aggressively positive and loud either which I think is why I picked him over Kirishima for you.

+++

“Hey babe, whatcha reading?” Sero asked sitting next to you on the sofa, he handed you a soda which you gratefully took, not looking up from your laptop screen.

As soon as he was sat down comfortably your hand grabbed his, clasping your fingers together as you managed to tear your gaze away from the Wikipedia page which was still open. You blinked up at him and shook your head.

“Oh just something I learned about today and wanted to do some.. extra reading” you explained.

He nodded his head and drank his soda watching as your face lit up as you started to ramble about the topic, he didn’t really know much about it but the way you told him about everything, the way you happily expressed your interest towards the topic made him happy. He gave you his big grin when you finished.

“Sorry, I rambled..” You felt bad, you always felt nervous when you info dumped on people.

“Nah, it’s cool, I didn’t mind at all” he brought your hand up to his face and gave it a kiss, your face flushed at the gentle gesture which caused Sero to laugh playfully.

“Well, if your sure… I just wanted something to take my mind off chores”.

“It’s the weekend, you don’t have to rush anyway.. and if you don’t feel better by tomorrow I can help, you can wash the dishes and I’ll dry?” he suggested still peppering kisses on the back of your hand before you set your laptop down and crawled closer to him.

You nodded softly, that sounded a lot more manageable, you felt your anxiety settle down from a raging nagging feeling to something easier to tolerate. He was such a good influence on you. Sero set down his drink and wrapped his arm around you, pulling you closer to his chest.

“The guys want to come over and say hi later, maybe get pizza… but I can tell them not tonight if you aren’t feeling it… maybe you can play that new game you got? I liked watching you play the other night” He suggested as he nuzzled your head, enjoying how your hair felt on his face.

“Maybe… can I give you an answer later?”

“Yeah, no rush babe”

You smiled softly feeling the lanky boy kiss the side of your head and listened as you carried on talking about the trivia of your current interest.

[normiewrites]

happy birthday katsuki! despite it being such a joyous occasion, i wrote something pretty down in the dumps. i dont wanna explain the plot and hope you all understand it, or not, doesnt matter as long as it made u feel something cause i felt nothing writing this. i tried making it more realistic than fiction and im pretty proud of it.

prompt was taken from @daily-prompts

thanks for beta reading @savnofilter @kingtamakimurder !

other tags: @mci-writing @lady-bakuhoe @mutantjournalist @assortedanime

warning(s): its kinda depressing, angst, smut, fwb, drugs (not too much)

‘when is it ok to steal something?’ - bakugo katsuki x (fem)reader

you didn’t know when you started noticing it all. but you did, whether you liked it or not. the way that the newspaper cut outs would hang lazily off his dull yellow walls, the gravity forcing them to bend over like worshipers. or the way that the green big grenades on his desk were more roughed up than you were with the drugs in your system. or the way that his left calloused hand was always so tightly held onto your waist, leaving bruises for the next day as memories, while his right robotic one barely ghosted your skin, as if he was trying not to accept the truth. 

but the biggest thing you noticed was how empty everything was inside of him. you believed that you didn’t have any choice but to notice these things, because you were constantly only being fucked doggy style, never to face him and only the blank sheets beneath you. or maybe because it was to distract you from the cold droplets of water that would rain onto your back in small amounts. he always cried and maybe that’s why he never wanted you to face him, to never see how his tears pulled out his broken soul for you to see.

it was always like this, and each time, you would never get closer. you’d meet him in the parking lot near your apartment. it was a big and lonely parking lot, the streetlamps barely working as they flicked on and off, like the universe was sending you a morse code. he would always be ten minutes late no matter what time you would reach. maybe it was because he wanted to guarantee your existence, to know that you’ll be there waiting for him, like he was scared that if he showed his eagerness, it would make you run away.

was he even eager to ever meet you? you wouldn’t really care, not because he was a good fuck and gave good prices for your drugs, but because you couldn’t. he was always a mirage, there for you to see but not touch and despite how hard he would rut his hips against your ass, he could never be close enough to capture.

there was never any time for ‘talking’. he always got straight to the point once he picked you up. smoking a few blunts in his living room before taking off both of your clothes and proceeding to his bedroom. neither of you would ever mutter a word yet you both knew what each other wanted. it was a ritual now. you always picked the easiest clothes to take off, not even bothering to wear a bra, and he liked it that way. most boys would, they’d find it hot and alluring, always aroused with how you planned to get down. but bakugo liked it because it meant he would spend less time close to you. it would mean he would have to use his prosthetic arm less.

you felt like you knew nothing about him. or maybe you knew too much to be true. the news paper cut outs would be all about the pro-heroes’ stories. deku, uravity, red riot, grand and many more. but most of them were about all-might. at first, you would’ve thought that he was just a fan boy and loved to keep track on the hero society. but the more times you came over and looked at them, the more you realised that they were pinned up so wrong. they were hung with sorrow and regret, pins in the wrong positions like he was playing darts while drunk. why did he do that? why did he pin them up with more pain than joy? was he actually drunk or was his past controlling his future?

it was amusing to you, the way he would make you feel so good and satisfied yet so lost and yearning. you weren’t even yearning something for yourself, rather for him. no matter how hard or how longed you yearned, you could never understand what it was for, and neither did he. of course, you never asked him about it, because the first few times you did, either you were told to leave or he would just straight up ignore you.

however, this night was different. you were going to hold your ground against him and find out the truth, because while it felt so good to be filled by his warm actions, it was all so empty and felt like there was no purpose as time went on. maybe this new found confidence was due to having the pro-hero deku walk by you on the street during patrol, or maybe because you wanted to desperately know what was on the photo frame that he always put down before giving into your urges.

“katsuki!” you moaned softly, moaning as he pressed a searing hot kiss against your neck, smoke gliding out of his mouth and tickling your chin as his hands massaged your ass.

you had gotten to the use of the cold metal of his prosthetic hand against your skin, in fact you found it slightly pleasing of the contrast in temperatures of both of his hands. maybe that’s why he kept you around; you were the only one who accepted him like that without questioning it. you couldn’t care to question it, you were a quirkless girl in a quirk filled world, nothing was shocking anymore. besides, you found it kind of cool. if only you knew how cursing it was.

the night was hot and urgent, the both of you were tearing each other’s clothes as you sat atop his lap on the sofa in the living room. the cheap material of the sofa dug into your knees as you grinded against his hard and restrained boner, moaning against his cheek, not caring for the sweat that accumulated on his forehead. you both had never kissed. it was one of the two rules that he had put from his side. no kissing, and no facing him. you had respected them as he respected yours, but the time you both spent together wanted you to be a rebel and break down those walls.

you giggled softly, the feeling of your high running through your body like silk on freshly shaven skin overriding your usual thoughts and stresses as you heard the familiar tear of your panties, a rough mark being left behind on your skin.

“you’re giving me the next 10 grams free, that was expensive, katsuki” you whispered, tugging on his hair as he growled softly at your name, leaving rough kisses against your collarbone and breasts.

katsuki liked having you around. you didn’t talk too much, didn’t question the mess of his room and silently adored his prosthetic arm, no matter how much he hated it. you were simple and not demanding yet you could pull out so many explicit moans from him. but the most important part is that you didn’t push about the tears that always seemed to find their way onto your bare back. you were comforting, almost too comforting that at times it alarmed the scared animal in his heart.

after sharing a few more rounds of blunts and hickeys, you felt the familiar nudge of his arms, his signal to tell you to go on all fours, never to face him for the rest of the night. but something inside of you stirred up, almost like you were being controlled from an outside force. you found your hands pinning his against the backrest of the sofa, a confused look shooting through his red eyes, his blonde eyebrows furrowing underneath his matching hair.

he moved to speak up but you cut him off, “please, just for tonight. i promise, i won’t judge, just please.”

you didn’t realise you were closing your eyes tight until you saw the sudden intrusion of red and blonde in your vision once his gruff answer snapped them open.

“why?”

least to say, bakugo was nervous. he had never felt this nervous since his surgery day. he couldn’t even believe you made him nervous, it was so stupid to him. his younger self wouldn’t be as nauseous as he is now, but then again, lots had changed and he wasn’t like him anymore.

“your face is just so pretty, i wonder how much prettier it gets with tears falling down” you muttered, holding his face in your palms as your thumbs brushed his cheekbones.

you were so close to him, much to close for his liking. well at first, it was too close, but he soon recognized the spike in his heart was the fact that he was exhilarated by your statement. he knew that you knew he cried, and he felt too ashamed to show you. but there was no hiding now, there was no point.

despite the soft blush that adorned his cheeks and the furrowing of his brows, he kept his face the same. it was like he had the inability to change his face, like he was wearing those clay face masks that would restrict movement. it was the expression of when you get laid-off from a job that you worked so hard for and was praised by your bosses for.

you nearly thought that you ruined the night as he backed his face out of your hands, his eyes looking elsewhere. now it was your turn to be nervous. the air was so still, unlike his red eyes as they tried to look for something to lock onto, to anchor him and help him make his decision.

“fine” was all you heard before you felt him lift you up slightly, aiding him and standing on your knees as he shifted his sweatpants and boxers down, his eyes still not on yours.

you couldn’t comprehend what happened, not only because of how surprising his reaction was, but because of how less time he gave you before slipping his cock into your wet hole. the action was so simple yet so satisfying, just like you.

“katsuki!” you moaned loudly, your fingers going over the small scars that littered around his undercut till they reached his blonde top, pulling on them.

it was hot and desperate, the way that he would quickly get to work on your nipples as he would thrust up into you and how you would roll against his hips, tugging on his hair and nipping on his ears. you fully understood how much you had been missing out on, how close it finally felt. the way that his arms would snake up against your back, pulling your chest closer to his face, even managing to angle his cock deeper. there was just one bridge left to cross and it was the man himself below you.

he was thankful for how loud your moans were to cover up his sniffles, and it was an odd feeling as his cold tears raced down your chest to your belly rather than on your back. and like before, you weren’t going to ignore this.

and like before, it didn’t feel like they were your actions as you had tugged his face up, connecting his lips to yours before he could say anything to stray you away. his lips were chapped and motionless against yours and you tasted the saltiness of his tears that had reached the cavern. it was so hot yet empty, just like him.

“what the fuck, y/n?” he asked, the nature of the words contrasting from how soft his voice was and how tired his eyes looked.

neither of you noticed how both of you stopped, the lust gone just like the rules that you had broken. if you could describe his face in terms of a colour, it would be grey. it was so sullen, tear marked and conflicting, just like thunderstorms.

“who are you, bakugo katsuki?” you asked, hands gracing his bare collarbones as you searched his face for answers. but it wasn’t like you were going to find any, because there weren’t any. hopefully one day though, you could make some for him, or at least he hoped that.

he completely ignored your question, sighing softly as he rested his forehead on your chest, not bothering to clear up his eyes.

“tell me, y/n, when is it okay to steal something?”

when was it okay to steal something? maybe it was okay when people got what they wanted through injustice manners. or maybe if it was something needed for an emergency, of course not that the cost of others. but then again what was stealing? poets would call it love, judges would call it a crime, thieves would call it a life.

you had so many answers that you didn’t want to say any, because what if the other was a better choice? so you stayed quiet, letting him fill the silence this time.

“tell me, y/n, when was it okay to steal my parents? when was it okay to steal my arm? when was it okay to steal my fucking life?”

the pain that rippled through your body was enough to ignore the snot and the buckets of tears that fell down your chest. in fact, it was too much, making your own eyes water, your hands instinctively rubbing his warm and firm back. who was he? the answer was too broad. too complicated. too scarring. it was all about him and nothing about him.

you didn’t mind the way that he gripped your arms, because the bruises would be nothing compared to what he went through. so, you pulled him close to you, letting him shake against you and cry against your neck.

bakugo didn’t know why he was opening up to someone like you. you both were just supposed to be fuck buddies, nothing else, and yet you had broken him down, and he fell voluntarily. maybe it was because of your quirklessness, or how observant and patient you were with him. but like many other unknown answers that night, it couldn’t matter to him, because you understood or at least wanted to. he needed you.

he needed a reason to live again.

[offtopicoverload]

what’s up kc!! 2, 8, 9, 13, 17, 28, and 37 for the meme for fic writer questions 😁

love youuuuu!

2 (Is there a trope you’ve yet to try your hand at, but really want to?)

so i answered here but then i looked up tropes cuz i couldn’t think of any and saw coffee shop au and i mean maybe. i haven’t read many, but they’re always cute yknow?

sidenote- i saw the term ‘draco in leather pants’ and just ????

8 (Share a snippet from one of your favourite dialogue scenes you’ve written and explain why you’re proud of it.)

“What are we doing here? Are you going to mug me?”

“No! Close your eyes.”

“Okay, you’re definitely mugging me.”

“Just do it. Please? Perfect.”

“This is a very elaborate ruse to mug me, you know.”

“Would you stop it?”

“Just saying. You already know where I live and when I have work, you don’t have to mug me.”

“Stop it or I really am gonna mug you.”

“Knew it.”

“Shut. Up.”

“Fine, fine. Just leave my money alone.”

“Just your money?”

“What’s that meant to mean? You want my phone, too?”

“Just checking if you’re available then.”

“Depends.”

“On what?”

“What you want out of me. I’m not mugging people with you.” 

“You’re the worst.”

“Aw, you really care.”

“I care about your money.”

“Knew it. Golddigger.”

“Arsehole.”

“Says the mugger.”

the banter in hope dumps noah is probably one of my favourites ive done, like i just really liked writing rosie as an annoying little shit ashdfjkg and then this bit specifically came to me in a fever dream and i think was one of my first ventures into banter banter sooooo

9 (What fic has been the hardest to write?)
oof. i dunno. i forced whispers and hope dumps noah during bouts of block, i think whispers took me like 6 hours in the middle of the night to finish piecing together or something. and hdn was like 12 to get a couple k done

13 (What’s the best writing advice you’ve ever come across?)

just do whatever. dont worry about other people or grammar, or anything, say fuck it and have fun

ive always been super neurotic about spelling and grammar and formatting, and just kinda saying not worrying about that dumbass rule that says you cant start a sentence with “and” or “but” or “because” has been really fuckin rad

17 (Do you write your story from start to finish, or do you write scenes out of order?)

out of order and bouncing between fics. i currently have 10 docs open, and ive been jumping through three today, writing whatever scene is easier at the time

28 (Share three of your favourite fic writers and why you love them so much)

OKAY SO

@ravenadottir like. themmmmmm yknow? the amount they write, and the talent and skill and dedication to everything is just unbelievable. like im still not over that lottie fic and its been months since i read it last

@bubblelaureno cuz its iris and i love them to death and they’re so dedicated to everything and so sweet and i dont get how they write so much or come up with the things they do, but they fuckin do it man

and then coco g on ao3 has one of my fav oneshots, how did we get here? it was one of the first fics i ever read and im still not over it

37 (Talk about your current WIPs)

oh boy. ill just do first two on my posting. ones a queen b request that i totally forgot about for two whole ass months and am finishing to post tomorrow or so, its essentially a rewrite of chapter 1. and then the second is elisa x mc for the fanfic sub prompt competition of fake dating and i dont really wanna spoil cuz im super hyped

fic asks

[karsonisnot]

Alright, so imma try just straight text posting the chapters to my tumblr as well, seeming as it seems to work for other people, however i will leave a copy of the link on here so u guys can show some love there if u like.

https://my.w.tt/KeEgwDgCpbb

MiKayla meets Chloe and Belle for the first time after being seperated from the rest of the world almost all her life. Mikayla all of a sudden finds herself back in the old world when they explain everything that has been going on, with one goal. To take down it all.

*DISCLAIMERS*

This is not about the dream smp member, this is a time where they have grown up and had kids, which is told from their perseptive.

This was written in a time where all these people were alive story wise, so fuck it, they all lived to have kids. No, i will not be explaining where the kids come from, but they are related to their respective parent. Im just too lazy to explain it

And in this, TOMMY AND TUBBO ARE JUST FRIENDS. Stop shipping 16 year olds together, and get your life together.

Chapter one: running and hiding

Everything had been diffrent for awhile. Not that anything about chloe's life was normal to begin with, but alot was changing. Her and her family was forced into hiding a long time ago, before the first retakeover happened before she was even born.

   She had been told what had happened countless times, so many it was almost like she lived it. The manburg second rise to power. When her dad stuck around. That was, till Niki got killed in the crossfire of the war. That was when her dad grabbed his best friend and booked it, and ran so far away they would never be found, and built themselves a world out here

  She was broken from her thoughts by a chicken in her room. She didnt really think much of it till she realized there was a chicken in her room

  "What the fu-"

  "NO, GET BACK HERE"

  Her dad ran full force into the room, bewilidered.

  "THERE YOU ARE" He screamed, throwing himself at the chicken, who just dodgedhis attack.

   She fell backwards out of the way, her blond hair blocking anything that happened, until she threw it back into place and saw her dad. On the floor. With a chicken trying to eat his hair.

   She sat there and watched as her dad fought with the chicken over who owned his hair. Eventually he managed to get up and grab the chicken before it could try and flee again.

  He looked at her, and she couldnt hold back her laughter anymore. His hair was an absoulte mess and he looked like he was in extreame disstress.

  "What's so funny, what, do you wanna wrestle a fuckin chicken?" He said, shoving the chicken in her face, just causing it to go more crazy.

  "NO NO NO, I will not be fighting any chicken, thank you, please put the weapon down." She said, swatting it away.

  "Well maybe next time don't get a chicken in your room."

  "Well maybe next time dont let a chicken loose from the pin with the front door open."

  They both heard a muffled laugh come from the hallway, and saw Belle standing there. Her black hair in way better condition then either of theirs.

  "Well, she is right Tommy." She remarked, trying to look innocent.

  At that, Tommy stormed off mumbling profanities at the chicken, and went outside to put it back in its pin.

   Belle walked in and went to the window ledge, after a couple of seconds, Chloe joined her.

   "How are you this morning?"chloe said after watching her dad dump the chicken in the pin.

  "Eh, im pretty good, espically after watching that. You?"

  "Im pretty okay."

  Belle looked over at her, and saw her looking out into the forest.

  "Your thinking about going out there again, arent you?"

  "I mean, maybe."

   Belle looked at her, with a mix of emotion, mainly concern.

  "Come on man, you know thay area is off limits. We cant go out there."

  "I mean, why not? We've done it before, nothing bad ever happened, I dont understand the pararnioa around a wooded area!" Chloe said, defensively.

   Belle looked out at the scenery. The trees going over the feilds, the lake about a half mile out, not a single other thing in sight. Ever.

  "I mean, we always use to go out there at night" Chole began. "We would go out there with nothing but lanterns and we would run around, just not caring  about anything. We would play by the lake, we would talk about whatever came to mind, we would bring swords put there and practice on trees, we would do anything, and nothing would ever happen."

   Belle sighed. She was right, but they stopped going years ago to keep both their dads sane. They were paranoid about manburg or "worse" finding them. Whatever worse meant.

  "Hey, have you two seen Tommy?" A voice said from behind.

  They both turned around to find Tubbo at the doorway, looking worried.

  "He was suppose to come in after taking care of the chicken."

   He walked up to the window, and they all three started started scanning the area, to find no Tommy, anywhere.

  "Where could he have g-"

   He was cut off short by seeing Tommy run up the hill, clearly in panic.

   Tubbo ran out to the hallway just to meet Tommy in the middle.

  "Get the kids out if here. Now!" Tommy said, scrambling to his gear.

  "What, why, what goin-"

  "I DONT HAVE TIME TO EXPLAIN, THEIR HERE TUBBO, GET THEM OUT, NOW!"

   Tubbo instantly turned around and met the two girls in the hallway.

  "Okay girls, with me, and hurry." He said, alreadly on his way to the back of the house

   They followed as quickly as they could, extreamly concerned and confused. Tubbo, after a little seaching, found a loose floorboard and lifted it up, inside was a backpack.

  "Okay, Chloe, take this, and grab your weapons on the way out the back, and run. Run far away from here."

  "What, why, whats going on?!" Belle said, clearly about to break down.

  "Look, keeping it short, manburg forces found this area. Just keep running North, and when we can, me and Tommy will find you, but for right now, we need to hold our ground, or risk everything in this house."

  "Wait, why not just leave too?!" Chloe said, dumbfounded they even thought of staying.

  "Because, there are things in this house we cant risk them getting, now leave please, before you cant!"

   Chloe grabbed Belle by the arm and started walking the direction of the back door.

  "WAIT!" Belle yelled, forcing chloe to let go.

   Belle ran up to her dad, and hugged him, tears starting to stream.

  "I love you dad." She said, grip tighting.

  "I love you too, honey bee, now go, Ill be there soon."

   She let go and ran back to chloe, and grabbed her sword and bow. Chloe took her axe and took for the back door with Belle.

  "BE GOOD TO HER CHLOE" she heard Tubbo yell before the door fully shut.

   They both took down the hill as fast they could. And ran for the forest. When they were finally there, they stopped for a second to take things in.

   First mistake made that night.

  "WHO'S OVER THERE!" They heard a man say, right before turning and being met with a crossbow

   Chloe grabbed Belle and took off in the opposite direction, not knowing if she was going the right way.

  "GET THEM!"

  Chloe cursed under her breath and looked at Belle, who was now running right next to her. They both knew what to do. They were taught in this circumstance, move in a difficult way.

   Bella all if a sudden split off, and Chloe, hoping they wernt near, grabbed on to a tree and climbed into the leaves.

  Guess sneaking out did pay off in the end.

  Only about two minute later, she saw people move underneath.

  "Where did they go?" A woman said.

  "Dont know, but they cant have gone far." A male voice spoke out.

   Chloe stayed still, trying to not make them look up, because if she did, her khaki colored jeans and red jacket wouldnt blend in the best.

  Chloe looked around and saw something else in the trees. After a few seconds, Belles face appeared through the leaves, making direct eye contact with her. They both did there best to communicate with their eyes, but it wasnt going to work wothout their hands being able to move.

  "What do we do, sir?" The female said, speaking up.

  "Split up, their teens, they cant do anything to us, so split up and find their hiding spot."

  They heard movement happen below them, and after a while of not hearing them, they jumped down.

  Chloe, pointed in a direction, next to asking if they should go that way with her face. Belle proceeded to do neck swipey thingy with her hand and pointed the other direction. Chloe nodded, not wanting to argue silently with her.

  They both went in that direction, weapins in hand, waiting for something to happen. But nothing ever did. And they eventually put away the weapons and started talking

  "Do you know where the fuck we're going?" Chloe asked, clearly done with all of this.

  "Nope, not a clue."

  "Oh great, this is gonna go extreamly well."

   They went on for hours. And hours. And hours. Till eventually they needed to stop. They came upon this rocky cliff and decided to sit there, and rest for a short while.

  "I cant fucking beilive this, i thought we were safe from all of that shit." Chloe said, sitting down next to belle.

  "I really dont know why."

  Belle sat there and thought, letting her mind wonder on what just happened and what could have possibly happened. Their parents could have fended them off, saved the day, and be on their way here right now. But, on the oppsite side, what if they lost. What if they were taken in. Or worse, what if they were de-

  "What's that." Chloe said, breaking her thought trail.

  Clhoe was pointing at the rock, and after an embarrsing amount of seconds, Belle found it. It was

  "A button."

  Chloe got up at the mention of anything clickable, and walked towards it. Belle knew what was about to happen.

  "Uh, maybe dont press the mys-"

  Too late.

  All of a sudden, a part of the wall started opening and Belle got up in response. She turned to see a giant hole being made into a cavern. A lit cavern.

  "Holy shit." Chloe said, stunned.

  "Sho- should we really go in there?" Belle said, clearly scared if whats inside.

  "Oh come on, stop being a pussy. After all, our lives could be ruined, why not risk it"

  Chloe took a soild pace towards the entrace, Belle scrambling to catch up, not wanting to be left behind. When they got inside, the doors shut alot faster then it could open. But before they could even blink, they heard a voice.

"Dad, is that you?"

[rigginsstreet]

Tell me about the symptoms of ptsd that fp shows

wish i had the gifset i was looking at earlier that brought all this up lmao but anyway google is free SO

agitation, irritability, hostility, self destructive behavior.... self explanatory we have visual canon proof of all those things. self isolation... like sending your son to go live with your best friend bc you dont think youre good enough to raise him (which to be fair he is not but also his sons shitty so idk whos winning that battle for rightness but whatever) ALSO im willing to bet if we saw the actual downfall of his and gladys’ marriage we wouldve seen his attempts at pushing her away much like how he was with fred in 107 at the jailhouse (not saying hed be physical with her but like... idk the mind wanders sometimes i cannot lie but mentally hed be in the same space) ALSO theres the alleged matter of the flashback where we see fp (along with everyone else but sh we’re focusing on fp right now) isolating himself from the group which i mean really him cutting ties with everyone who is not fred makes sense cuz they werent friends to begin with but (and idc what r*s wanted us to believe) he and fred were absolutely friends prior so THAT particular relationship is what needs to be focused on because fp pushing himself away from fred actually means something in this context.

emotional detachment is another could-be symptom... as i have also discussed via is reactions to freds death + his alcoholism which always either goes one of two ways: we see him drinking to numb the emotions or we see the drinking enhancing them (and of course all this ties back into self destructive behavior)

now for this part... i want to make it VERY clear that i absolutely do not condone riverdales writing.... i think we’re all aware of that here but lest this post get in the hands of outsiders lmao... just wanna make it clear. and they absolutely are not thinking this deeply... about anything.... but especially about fp... but like if i were the one taking charge of this storyline with whats already been written... this is how i would explain things:

so lost of interest or pleasure in activities can also be a symptom of ptsd and at first i was like eh i dont know if i really see anything in canon that backs this up BUT then i remembered fps constant flip flopping about the serpents and how he was all set up to have this cushy life on the north side only to later go back to the serpents (i guess? i still dont know whats hes doing) and particularly that stupid ass scene with archie at pops talking about how he missed ... street fighting... i guess.... anyway i say all this to say that it doesnt directly fit into “loss of interests” but i think its worth noting how he never seems to be satisfied (which... i know is 100% just inconsistent writing. i get that yes we know but i also think theres some truth to be dug out from that bc uhhhh i can do whatever i want thank you) but once again this also ties back into self destructive behavior because of course fp cannot just leave things alone when hes got it good he has this raging boner to fuck everything up at all times

ALSOOOOOO

why was it so easy for clifford to get fp on board with dumping jasons body ??? jughead wasnt threatened until fp was already arrested like WHAT fucking hold did clifford have over him ?? other than the fact that he was a man with much more power than fp and im not saying that couldve possibly triggered some twisted need to go along with him to like... appease him but... i dont know. im not a psychiatrist. (also again i know lazy writing but shhhh im on a roll)

heightened reactions... his fucking temper tantrums and outbursts... yea so theres that

fear/severe anxiety all i can think about is how in 302 when they were all confronted about g&g he had such an intense look on his face compared to everyone else WHICH I STILL WANT ANSWERS FOR but also i just gave myself one. youre welcome me (also ties in to heightened reactions)

did i mention depression? that bitch is clearly depressed and anyone who says he isnt is a liar or has never seen a depressed person

OH AND WE CAN ALSO TALK ABOUT THE SCENE WHERE HE ACTUALLY TELLS JUGHEAD WHAT AN ABUSIVE PRICK SENIOR WAS AND HOW HE LOOKED STILL VISIBLY SHAKEN WHILST THINKING BACK ON THAT TIME

insomnia/nightmares are also symptoms and while we have no canon proof he suffers either of those.... has that man ever looked well rested in his life? no. i rest my case.

[irkenheretic]

okay i promised id do it and im doing it: Explaining The Plot Of That AU I’m Vague About: The Post

(as i was preparing to write this i actually got my 250th follower, which slapped)

so i’m just gonna start with the simple version, which is this: it’s a rebel AU which primarily centers around the tallest, who are both defective. they give up on trying to make any meaningful changes as figureheads, and instead direct their attention to being involved with the “neo defect revolution,” or NDR. they do manage to make one change as tallest- there is a garbage dump planet turned into a sanctuary for defectives (who in this au are executed once discovered,) and eventually enough of the populace finds out about it that the tallest have to deal with it. they finesse their way into kicking it out of the empire, so now it’s its own planet with its own rules, governments, and most importantly, immigration policies and protections

a lot of stuff happens and it’s gonna be structured using arcs, and each arc has a separate protagonist/deuteragonist/tritagonist lineup (but that doesnt mean the same lineup won’t be used multiple times!) and yes the insane list of OCs are for this au alone: some arcs are very OC-centric, some have OCs as supporting characters, and a couple are all-OC or mostly-OC. 

its going to be very longform and it’ll span from the tallest’s elite training days to twenty years after zim arrives on earth. (the 20 year gap btwn zim arriving on earth and the story proper isnt as tightly plotted as later tho.) the point is to see how a revolution on the scale of the NDR works, who was fucked over by defact laws, who was fucked over by other laws, etc. theres a lot of lore and a lot of headcanons i made for this AU and even a conlang. i am a being of hubris. itll be a series of fics, some multichapter and some oneshots. 

the series as a whole is gonna be called Invader Zim: Annexed or just Annexed for short. its a pun on an irken word that sounds similar but means the exact opposite. i am not explaining more bc itll be explained in the fic itself. but thats why the tag for it is #anx lmao

i didnt mean for this to be as long as it got but under the cut im gonna breakdown some of the early arcs:

so it all starts with a fanfic called Love Is The H-Word (no the “h-word” isn’t “hell.) it centers around red and purple as elites-in-training, who do a little whoopsie and have an egg. purple doesnt wanna smuggle it into a smeetery, bc then he’ll never see it again, so they go to the defect sanctuary (still a part of the empire at this point.) purple knows he’s defective while red has a hard time accepting that he is as well, due to events from his past. but being around all these other defects are starting to wear down his denial, and the fic is all about that. it also sets up some plot stuff, like how defects adopted a self-identifier in the word “heretic,” hence the sanctuary being named, “heretirk.” (hey look my url!) (no, the “h-word” is not heretic, either.) 

i dont wanna say what happens in that fic bc spoilers, but stuff Happens. its also when we meet some ocs that end up being important, and the existence of others are foreshadowed. this is also where we meet the tallests’ future advisor, rarl kove, for the first time, as a local who decides to keep them company. purple bonds with kove due to their shared interest in politics, while red reluctantly bonds with titch, a young irken (a smeet in heretirken standards, an adult in imperial standards- did i mention he and red are roughly the same age? lol) who is interested in military stuff and thrill-seeking and general destruction. titch is pissed because he claims his father is stealthing on devastis as a military commander, but won’t let titch sneak in as a soldier, as titch is deaf. 

(fun facts: in the au, “titch” is regional slang for “a little bit.” ironically, titch the character is above-average in height.)

due to titch’s deafness, he developed “gesturespeak,” irken sign language, so he can communicate. this existing becomes important later

a oneshot called invade the system is right after h-word in publishing order. it details zim’s exploits in leaving foodcourtia, where he was assigned and infiltrating the invading academy he eventually graduates from (in this au, zim is too short to be an invader, which sucks because the hight minimums for the military are really short to begin with lmao)

the fic chronoligically after H-Word focuses on red and purple being back in their platoon on devastis, specifically red navigating his training and his relationships with two defective platoonmates, pon and zi (who are in h-word a little,) after the realization that he too is defective. it also focuses on how the irken military works, and how they train their soldiers. 

the first arc overall focuses on red and purple going thru training and such, and ends after they graduate and are on the field, working to get commander rank. (they planned to gain commander rank then leave and go back to heretirk to train an army there, as heretirk has.... no army.) in the middle of this, they’re pulled out and told they are to become the next tallest. they debate over staying and taking the job or just running to heretirk, and they ultimately decide to stay.

the next arc i call the “bridge,” tbh. its less tightly plotted than the other arcs; fics are spread apart from each other chronologically and all that. it spans the time after the tallest being appointed to a little after zim arrives on earth. it also has a couple of anthologies focusing on imperial defects- each chapter is a new character. these guys are all important and the easiest way for me to introduce their backstories without cluttering everything up is anthology style, lmao. other things that happen are a look into how the tallest work, eventually culminating with the resolution of the tallest having to Deal With Heretirk, tenn’s rescue from meekrob, and zim on earth obtaining a half-irken smeet named pip due to stealing an Unethical Science Experiment from dib (which is pip.) the bridge is basically just. “heres some stuff that happens between point A and point B so when we get to point B you’re not confused as all hell.” 

the next arc focuses on zim. in the first fic, pip is sick and zim is trying to get into his neighbor’s pants, to cope. this basically sets up that zim in this au has no idea how to find personal fulfillment in living- he’s only OK if he focuses on pleasing someone else, be it taking care of pip or doting on the neighbor, some rando human named piqu (pronounced, “peek.”) this is mainly a cute romance story with the underlying veneer of “a child is slowly and painfully dying” in the background. fun! 

without spoiling the circumstances, zim and pip end up on heretirk, which at this point is its own independent planet. pip is in the hospital for most of it so zim has to do his own thing. computer fans rejoice bc hes basically zims dad at this point, who tells him to go outside and get some fresh air and talk to the locals instead of schmooping or screaming in anxiety. im sneakily introducing more characters like ini, the “next-gen zim;” a short bio-engineer (she works on PAKs) who was constantly passed over by everyone because they dont trust someone that short or they dont trust someone that spazzy, even though shes actually brilliant. also her brother mo, who’s a pilot that NOBODY will teach military-class ships to (at this point, HTK has a population of ex-military that had their old ships, but still no formal army) because he doesnt talk and they think hes “slow” as a result. for the curious, he is physically able to talk most times, he just doesnt like it. zim ends up teaching him how to fly military-class which ends up being important laterrr

(haha ini and mo. wheres meenie and minie? ILL GET TO THEM)

no really, theyre quadruplets. named ini, myni, minie, and mo. these are real characters. 

minie isnt introduced till later. shes too cool to be the side character in someone elses arc. she is feel uncomfortable when we are not about her.

myni is busy palling around with pip and pip’s friend “elly” (real name elevenn, with two N’s.) elly is a half-meekrob War Crime Baby and tenn’s smeet. he has vision problems (he can “see” energy signatures of things, as opposed to conventional sight. everything is monochrome and he has to really focus to see like, words on a paper. also fuck tablets) but the trade-up is telekinetic powers (that he cant use too much or his brain will melt. fun!) this isnt relevant until the arc AFTER zim’s, where they end up poking around a historical site due to myni’s interest in that kind of thing, and they find logs of an old revolution (that was actually pretty successful in their goal, before they were caught and executed,) that lead them to a man named lefy. he helps with revolutions and helped these guys, and the trio go to seek him out; myni because he wants to impress his parents with helping them, pip because after they’ve recovered enough to walk around and do stuff, feel like they need to justify the choice to save their life and make their dad proud and all that, elly because he doesnt want pip to get hurt and die. And thats where the stuff REALLY starts happening and i cant tell u more sorry

this seemed kind of disjointed but thats bc i cant really be too detailed otherwise id like.... spoil it lmfao. but thats the summary of the first few arcs.

[hey-hamlet]

BNHA AU Ideas : Darker Stains

Also on AO3 

TL;DR: 

Being a villain might run in Izuku's family, but that doesn't mean he needs to be the same type of villain as his dad. After all, the world doesn't need another All for One.

But I could do with another Stain.

AKA: Izuku, stubbornly follows Stain around until the guy warms up to him, all while he slowly poisons his gen ed class against the concept of heroes. Iida is stuck in the middle of all of this and finding himself begrudgingly agreeing with the kid who seems too sweet to be a villain.

Basically, deku is stain's apprentice

Ok less apprentice, more like "kid he cant get rid of"

izuku has afo and is sensei's kid and its kinda been his mission to get stain onside, but he just kinda started staning stain

so he said "love u dad but can i just like, follow this guy" and his dad said "you know what, its good to broaden your villainous horizons" So he makes a deal w stain: the heroes don't have to die, but izuku will take their quirks from them

in this AU izuku can "borrow" a quirk pretty quickly but needs a solid minute of contact to fully take it

izuku goes to ua, hes a gen. ed. student! he's there to get connections/blackmail but he only shows up around 3 days a week because of "family matters" but he’s holding great grades so they haven’t pushed too hard about his attendance. the only quirk izuku is listed as having is minor telekinesis, its all he uses in school but he gets pretty far in the sports festival, all the way to the tournament but has to forfeit his match because he needs to do something

(it was against bakugo. he honestly could have fought it but bakugo would be way angrier not being allowed to fight him so he left a little early)

so bakugo has always been kinda,,, scared of izuku. he lives w his dad, his mum lives in europe or something, bakugo isn't sure (afo told her it'd be safer for her to leave the country because all might vs him would be dangerous. She agreed but asked that he A, look after izuku and B, she be allowed to give her quirk to him as a gift to keep him safe. its izukus favorite quirk) and izuku has always let off a creepy aura. he had a "weak" quirk but did a lot of unexplained things, was too smart etc and his dad was creepy as all hell

bakugo would never admit it, but he was kinda glad he didnt have to fight izuku

Iida doesn’t get the call from his mum until later so he gets his medal and everything.

turns out? tensei was stopped by the hero killers, they don't "kill" people but they do kill heroes, tensei fought, lost and lost his quirk

so everything happens as in canon up till hosu (mirio has ofa) so izuku knows iida a little, was on his team with todoroki (replaced kami, his quirk was great for grabbing headbands). He actually picked iida's team because he wanted to know more about him before they took on ingenium

he wasnt 100% onboard with the removal of ingenium because he wasn't all that bad but he wasn't perfect for stains ideology because he was pretty profit-focused, had no other heroes on team but loads of sidekicks who make lower rates than heroes and give his agency a funding boost and was from a Hero Family so it wasn't super likely he wanted to be a hero just to save people

but he was a nice guy and put his life on the line for people so izuku thought he was pretty ok but stain was sticking to his guns and izuku didn't want the guy dead,,, so he said sure. so, izuku kinda,,, knows iida is going to come after stain. he saw all the people who put in internship forms, he saw where iida put down and put 2 and 2 together. but, thing is? he really likes iida! every time he's met iida the guy has been super nice to him, if a little uptight. during the cavalry battle he even took a hit for izuku he didn’t need to and izuku liked that so he’s trying to steer stain away from where he knows iida is probably going to end up because fuck endeavour and he's in Hosu

(plus izuku wants that sweet sweet fire quirk because he's not allowed to take dabi's)

also: relevant but only just, izuku has a really cutesy villain costume and isn't linked to the hero killer (like, think bunny poncho)

so izuku is wandering around, trying to work out how to lure endeavour into a dark alley and not having much luck because the nomu are L o u d and he ends up getting pushed to the ground and trampled in a person stampede

which he's a little salty about! but, iida, a knight in shining armour, stops his search for the hero killer to help izuku up and ask if hes ok and izuku blushes despite himself because even tho hes trying to steal the number 2 heroes quirk hes a big fan of heroes and iida? pushing all the heroic buttons

so yada yada, stain ends up taking native because endeavour wasnt leaving the crowds and izuku goes over to take the quirk for him and iida shows up

He steps between izuku and stain (assuming stain ment to hurt izuku) and says hes going to get revenge for his brother

and stain just fucking,,, sighs because he can see izuku's blush from here and the kid is all starry eyed over baby ingenium but like, the kid is vengeance-y and that’s not great for a hero, so he thinks the least he can do is rough him up a bit to teach him what a hero should be doing, because he’s trying to make a point more than anything he doesn’t use his quirk yet and tries to explain his point to iida

izuku is sitting off to the side with native and just watching this go down (he,,, may also be stealing native's quirk,, because fuck that guy but thats not the point)

anyway, iida is losing, and pretty badly too because the kid is angry and alone. izuku has finished taking native's quirk, who still hasn’t realized because hes stupid so he hauls iida over his shoulder from where hes a little concussed on the ground and runs off with him, leaving stain to sigh because what has his life come to

izuku talks to iida about stains ideas while patching him up, admitting that he thinks iida's brother was actually a pretty good hero and that stains a little strict. iida cant help but understand stains way of thinking, even though hes mad at himself about it. he tries to ask izuku what he was doing but he just gets shushed

izuku kinda dumps iida on todoroki and runs

(todoroki swears there was something familiar about the rabbit costumed kid)

so, izuku like comes up to iida during school, says he heard ab. stain and that it was really impressive that he did all that yadda yadda, and then leaves, 20 minutes later todoroki sees iida trying to flex his arms and grimacing. iida admits his arms are a little sore but its nbd

during hero training iida collapses a little and ochako runs over, hes trying not to scream because his arms hurt so bad.

he heads to recovery girl and hes? ok? but now also got engines where his brother did? and todoroki and ochako are so lost. todoroki turns to iida and says "i know this is off topic, but didnt your involvement with stain get suppressed from the media?" and iida freezes

iida trying to find this gen ed student but he doesnt really remember izukus name. hes just "green boy w minor telekinesis who knew too much"

i want izuku ducking behind his bestie shinso to hide from the big bad hero student. shinso is ready to throw down for izuku honestly. izuku confided in shinso ab. his villainous quirk and shinso is honestly shaping up to be his righthand man. together they'll show the world what heroes should really be, by tearing the system to shreds

iida is trying to find "green boy". short skinny green boy who hides behind his tall angry friend and is only on campus like, half the week. 

needless to say iida is having some trouble

so iida, honestly losing faith in heroics (in this au, todoroki told iida about the quirk marriage) goes looking for stain

iida: “where is izuku”

everyone in gen ed: 💪🏽👁👄👁👊🏽

iida, now in tears: “what are you  say i ng”

basically in this au izuku has managed to poison the gen ed. kids against heroics. some of them cant stand their teachers anymore, none of them want to transfer, they fake gag when they see the heroics students and some of them have even dropped out but no one suspects izuku because the kid loves heroes!!!

mic is his homeroom teacher

ooooOOOH TRAITOR MIC TOO

so mic is also the traitor

but hes like,, stupidly in love with aizawa and izuku kinda loves eraserhead so izuku makes his dad promise to not hurt 1a/aizawa so in this au? aizawa doesn't get smashed by the nomu. aizawa was trapped by stains quirk so the guy has tr a u m a but he's not in pain. afo is honestly trying to kill allmight but izuku likes all might so they fight about it but like, a soft fight? and it's disturbing even shigiraki because you should not be lightly bickering over the life of a man

shigaraki s in the corner tears in his eyes because izuku just gave afo permission to “lightly maim him” like goddamn kid what’s wrong with u

stain runs into iida and he's like "god please i dont wanna fight you again the boss' kid will cry" and iida is like ",,, so tell me about izuku" and stain fucking glares at him w such intensity iida is both 1, sure he's correct 2, scared for his life

so stain calls kurogiri and throws iida into the bar and izuku jumps like, 6 feet in the air like a cat and is clinging to the roof but he calms the fuck down and iida is so shook that the only thing he can think to say is ",,, we are too young to be in a bar"

and izuku busts a gut and hes like, crying laughing "you're right we are way too young, why don't we go to another room?" dabi wolf whistles, then has to dodge izuku's now flying milkshake iida n izuku just chat! n iida is a little creeped? because izuku is charismatic and charming and iida agrees with him 100% but he shouldn’t be? he should be nervous or angry or at least a little confused but hes just so charming and bubbly its a little odd. honestly, all the stuff izuku pointed out? iida starts to see how bakugo can get away with acting like an ass but shinso can’t even look at someone wrong without getting set upon

iida is making massive leaps in his training because his quirk has doubled in strength! but, it feels like hes stolen something from his brother

but thats not possible, right? you cant give and take quirks.

of course not

...

right?

iida starts wondering what midoriya's quirk really is, exactly. he never named it. just said "i can use telekinesis on light stuff" but, he hung around villains and seemed to be respected by them, without any visible training, weapons or strength

and shinso, when prompted, said he empathised with midoriya, which iida thought was an odd word choice?

anyway, iida doesnt feel great during hero training. all might's villain costume feels almost offensive? and the profiling aizawa has them do feels wrong, like making assumptions based off the quirk, not the person. it just feels gross and wrong and he's starting to feel really conflicted. because stain hurt people. izuku hurt people.

but he agrees with them