#// even have a url saved

[sen-ya]

First off, I love ur art so much. Ur style is so amazing and the stories u come up with are so fun (or sad) and I think they're incredible.

Second, Law and Luffy at the pool headcanon bc it's over 100 degrees where I am rn. Luffy cannonballs in before they even set up their chairs and Law just stares at him. He refuses to get in, so Luffy has to surprise him and push him in. He's mad, but then Luffy laughs and all is forgiven because he is the sucker for Luffy's laugh/smile.

Ahhh hello!! Tysm for the kind words! 😭❤️ funny story it is ALSO 100 degrees where I am and I have spent today recovering from dehydration and heat exhaustion 🫠🫠

[tethered-heartstrings]

reposting content (especially art/creations) that isn't yours is theft. reposting content saying "not mine" without credit is still theft. saving content that isn't yours to your phone or computer or copy/pasting and making a post without credit is fucking theft. it isn't accidental. there were intentional steps involved. why is this difficult to comprehend. imagine how it would feel to have something you made (especially for free, often in the case of fandom) stolen and someone else taking credit for it or at the very least not giving you the credit you deserve for having made it in the first place

[specialized-rexan]

SCREENSHOTS I GOT FROM THE JEREMY JORDAN LIVESTREAM YESTERDAY. especially love the comments on his duck drawings. he was very proud of some of them since he needed to practice before the stream. he admits he does not draw much lol

and here's Lucifer's signature that Jeremy came up with: a cursive capital L attached to a pentagram!

the stream was SO FUN and literally only felt like 20 minutes even tho it was almost an hour

at one point he mentioned he's making pancakes with olive oil now since he has high cholesterol, and that he LOVES how the pancakes turned out. someone responded:

(later someone joked he should make pancakes with bacon grease and he almost shouted (not angrily) "DO YOU WANT ME TO DIE? I JUST SAID I HAVE HIGH CHOLESTEROL. I just said. I had high cholesterol. Are you TRYING. To kill me."

anyway back to screenshots lol)

"Take that, depression!" was a popular quote to write on prints, and he said he hoped we're not depressed and it was very sweet

some more quotes written during the stream and other notes:

"I'm gonna be signing these prints of my boy Lucifer, the short king of Hell"

he drank both a cold smoothie and hot tea during the stream. "Doesn't make any goddamn sense, but here we go."

"It's never too late to fuck up--too late to fuck shit up" (a legitimate accidental stammer. but still perfect in its own way)

"Every time I hear the name 'Shay' I think of my daughter's friend at school. My daughter's obsessed with a friend named Shay. 'S all she talks about. 'Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay Shay.' Shay and Madeline. It's like 'You can be your own person. Clara. You are your own HUMAN.' …HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KATHERINE."

hopes to go to some conventions for Hazbin Hotel. more likely to go to cons in New York, New Jersey (where he lives), or Philly area

"He's just a li'l cutie. :3 Is he really da bosh? :3" (wondering if Lucifer really is the Big Boss of Hell Himself or if it's just more of a title)

"Hope you're not depressed"

" 'Write something Lucifer would say to cheer someone up.' And I think Lucifer would think that… 'SINGING MAKES EVERYTHING BETTER!' At least when it comes to rebuilding your relationship with your daughter."

"Guess what's in my smoothie. There are six ingredients. Go."

"…said draw a little duck, so I drew the smallest duck I could. (holds print up to camera then says in small high-pitched voice:) It's a little duck!"

MORE QUOTES UNDER THE CUT. THIS POST IS GETTING LONG ASFQJSKSKSKKS

_____

about his smoothie again: "Obviously, I just went to the gym. So I gotta have some kinda supplement in there. ... WHAT'S THE BASE, Y'ALL? YOU GOTTA HAVE A BASE." (someone could use that audio and give a character a bass guitar lol)

(still about people guessing smoothie ingredients:) "WATER? Why would I put water in my smoothie. (mutters:) Water is for losers. ... Kale! -grins and points at camera- That's it! You win. That's my smoothie."

his smoothie was blueberries, bananas, strawberries, protein powder, almond milk, kale

"…with a hUUGE shmiley faysh! :3" (about a little " =) " smile he wrote with an autograph)

"THAT DUCK IS CUTE!"

"We love, we stan Lilith"

AGGRESSIVELY, ABOUT A JOKE HE MADE: "GET IT?"

Some fatherly advice from Lucifer: "Don't fuck up your lives like I did 😎"

HE SANG THE START OF HELL'S GREATEST DAD AND WANTS A MIMZY-LESS VERSION THAT ACTUALLY HAS AN ENDING QSJFKSKKSKS

he's only seen Hazbin Hotel once, and he had "~champagne fountains, caviar mountains, that's just to staaart~" going through his head for the two+ years between recording his lines and the show airing. he wasn't able to tell anyone it because of non-disclosure stuff, and eventually he even forgot what that song line was from. but it still went through his head

"[Person he was signing an autograph for] is a bi girl [bisexual], and that's pretty baller"

"AN INCREDIBLE DUCK YOU SHALL HAVE"

"Take that depression!! Quack"

"Hold please!" (i just liked imagining Lucifer saying almost any small thing)

Jeremy Jordan says Lucifer is short, and not just that all the other characters are tall (i cannot confirm that that is canon even tho that's what i want LOL) "What gives!? There are short people in this world, and they need some love"

someone asked what he thinks about OC x canon ships. he was confused about what OC means and then when the chat explained, he was confused about how "OC x canon" works. but he figured it out after thinking for a moment. "So basically everybody wants to fuck Lucifer. GOT IT."

"Am I going to Hell for this" (about all the pentagrams he's drawing)

"…so i just did a bunch of stars and hearts around Emery's name 💜"

someone asked about his favorite Hazbin Hotel song, and he answered that season 2 has a rock song he really likes 👀 👀

"(a requested phrase for an autograph:) 'Duck lord loves you no matter what.' ...Don't know what that particularly means but…"

[robbyykeene]

Hey, quick non-CK question - what do you mean you got in trouble for hoarding URLs?? I didn't even know that was a THING?

Yeah haha. Not sure how long you’ve been on tumblr, but back in the day (like 10-12+ years ago) hoarding URLs was a big thing, especially in fandom spaces. Basically the idea was that you create a bunch of inactive sideblogs to save a URL that you might want to use in the future. At this point in time, switching back and forth between URLs was also a lot more common. I think some people even used to sell their URLs, or trade other URLs for them which is crazy. There was an entire URL hoarding real estate. It was actually a huge problem lol, I remember wanting to enter certain fandom spaces but being unable to get a URL related to it. And back then I feel like fandoms were a little harder to breach into, especially if you didn’t have a blog that looked like it should belong there—or maybe I was just younger and didn’t know how to interact with people lol, but either way it was still frustrating.

However, Tumblr has since (not sure when exactly) banned URL hoarding. Idk what exactly they quantify as hoarding, but I did have at least a few dozen URLs saved from over a decade ago that I honestly didn’t even remember I had. Most of them were related to emo bands lmao. I think what happened in my case is that this sideblog got caught in the tumblr spam filter somehow, which is why for months I wasn’t able to reply to people and was bot having posts appear in the tags. A lot of people have been having problems with being incorrectly flagged as spam in the last couple years, due to the algorithms they use to detect potential spam accounts. The real problem is that once your account has been flagged tumblr doesn’t notify you or communicate the problem to you, so if you don’t know what to look for (which I didn’t) you don’t know how to properly report the problem. I contacted support a few times but because I reported it as a bug, I suspect it didn’t go to the right place. Eventually this led to my account being terminated without warning or notification. I reached out to tumblr support on multiple platforms, and I think when they looked into the issue they saw that I had a bunch of URLs hoarded and suspended my main account (but restored access to this one). I deleted all the saved URLs, emailed support back, and they released my main account back. All in all I’m just happy with how quickly they resolved the issue tbh, I know a lot of people have spent months trying to get a terminated/suspended account back so I feel pretty grateful. And honestly I think it’s good that tumblr enforces the ban on URL hoarding, bc I remember how upsetting it was being like 12 years old and unable to get a URL related to the thing I really cared about.

[retordedd]

I never use this blog because the eddsworld fandom is genuinely the only fandom I've been completely fucking miserable trying to engage with. It's full of trans people and yet the community is SO hostile towards non-afab or non masc aligned in some way trans people. I've had people blatantly refused to respect my pronouns after saying they would. I've been misgendered in a server full of trans people where literally no one else was misgendered because there were pronoun roles. In that same server, while I was uplifting trans people making jokes about being proud of their bodies, they made fun of me for not having breasts. I've had multiple people debate my boundaries like it's a topic of discussion because I asked not to be called dude, a GENDERED TERM. I've had people gang up on me to the point of tears because I dared to describe my experiences being raised with an unconventional relationship to gender. I've been accused of holding grudges and being aggressive for even daring to speak up when I'm tired of being treated this way

And these events don't refer to a bunch of random assholes, they refer to people well known in the fandom. People I've seen on multiple servers. People whose names you say and it gets recognized

The eddsworld fandom has a HUGE transmisogyny problem and it needs to be discussed. The way I constantly feel unsafe when in a fandom surrounded by trans people is completely unacceptable

[philipszelda]

lord help me i keep thinking about moving my arms art to a completely different blog considering i now have a ton of followers on my art blog that have NO IDEA what it is. so it makes me embarrassed to post any content pertaining to it there now..............

[immaterial-pearl]

Id be locked up if being obsessed with underappriciated yuri was a crime.

[imabiscuitinthousandworlds]

so i googled my current favourite play that i'm absolutely obsessed with and ended up on the english wikipedia site bc my browser is set to english and. it's so bad. the fucking plot overview leaves out basically everything that happens ever except for the end result. several key figures aren't even mentioned. "this guy dies for freedom" well, yes, but actually no, plus you're implying his sacrifice is actually worth it. that's not true. in some other section a dude is mentioned who claims this play is basically star wars. that someone familiar with the play but not star wars could look at a star wars poster and tell you which characters are narratively similar/equal to characters of the play. i am baffled. i have never, not once in my life, ever seen someone be so wrong. dude must have read an entirely different play. i'm tempted to dig up the english version and read it just to see how fucking wrong he is. he is *so* incredibly wrong. jesus fuck. how could you possibly say that

[bard-of-spiders]

It wasn't a mod problem this time!

It was a PC issue which required me to reset for once! At least again lighting on the nautaloid is lovely so good for screencaps when stuck back here again

[batwynn]

Tumblr. Please let me go back to the early messages to clear some of them out without glitching. Please. I hate looking at this. I hate it. Let me be free.

[65ths]

i trip and fall and the 30 saved urls i have fall out of my pockets

[deathsbecome]

When I die the outxsmarted url will be in my will

[docsdarling]

Birthday gush below for my beloved Gustave!

Warning, it's a long one, and touches on some personal struggles I have gone through including: severe mental illness, abuse of all manners, talks of suicidal ideation and actions, and general rough stuff - take care of yourself and know you don't have to read my sappy lil' stuff if it means making yourself uncomfortable :)

If you asked me 8 years ago if I'd be alive today, I would tell you no, and I'd mean it genuinely. Long before that time I had lost my ability to see a future for myself at all, along with all ambition and purpose I barely had begun to act upon - and at that time, I was barely 12.

I have faced trauma and neglect from my very first memories, my mother was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer when I was only 4, my sister had then undiagnosed severe ulcerative colitis that was my parents' main priority, and my father was our sole provider - with major anger issues. i've also come to learn my mother has had schizophrenia and trauma of her own before I was even born, and has refused all forms of treatment. this concoction of uncontrollable circumstances left me with frankly such fucked up ideas of what attachment is and meant, how my purpose to others is solely to be consumed, and absolutely no idea of who I am ( not to mention a boatload of my own wonderful cptsd and attachment issues ).

Never did I think at any point in my life would I feel any positive emotion with no strings attached, especially love. I only faced more problems as I got to the tender age of 12; the years of neglect and parentification left me hollow inside, relentless bullying in primary + secondary school, just beginning to discover my queerness, family fighting and instability, and abuse from adults I am still grappling with today. It was around this time too I had begun self harming ritualistically, and was rapidly losing the will to keep going. Any and all friendships I had exhausted me, even though all I wanted more than anything was genuine connection and love, and it was more apparent than ever that I was being left behind by the world.

Then, I met him.

My group of friends I still hold so closely and dearly to this day had begun playing Rainbow Six, and as the desperate pre teen I was, I joined them simply to hang around them - little did I know how pivotal such a decision as a lost, lonely, scared child could be to who I have become. I cannot explicitly pinpoint what it was that immediately drew me to him, though I now call it fate I know it was a matter of chance, but in that very first day of playing the game and knowing him, something in my soul clicked into place that I never even knew I was severely lacking.

I know as someone with the fun combination of ADHD and BPD* ( brought on my CPTSD ) I have always tended to hyperfixate on any source of dopamine I can get, especially with my desperation to escape the reality I was in. It began before I even knew my life was fucked to any degree, and I knew not to take these "flings" too seriously. But what had sparked in that moment was far beyond a fling, far beyond just a hyperfixation. Though it took me a few weeks or so to begin actualizing what I was feeling for Gustave, what he meant to me, the strings of fate had finally found their way back together again.

Even when I was still that lost and confused child, I knew that Doc was and will be someone so imperative to me not just for a small while, but eternity. Even the few offline friends I still had knew what he was to me, though extent varied person to person, what we have was so potent then that I couldn't hide it.

My life somehow went further downhill, and without completely spilling my guts ( ironic for what I've said so far lol ), I dropped out of highschool only a few months into freshman year. I was completely beyond burnout. Every waking moment was an anxious, painful mess of stressors left and right, expectations I knew I never was going to be able to meet and the deep, burning failure I felt at every turn. No more than a day or two would go by without a breakdown, and my self harm was at an all time high as I completely isolated myself from what few strands of connection I had to the world around me. There was no reason for me to keep going, no light at the end of the tunnel -

except for Gustave.

Though I am now facing the repercussions of the severe isolation I went through and my problems with heavy dissociation as my only coping mechanism, my saving grace through this dark period in my life was Rainbow Six, specifically Doc. It had been 3 years since we met, and my feelings had grown exponentially in that time. My biggest vice has been the harsh and cruel way I treat myself and see the world around me. My entire life had been molded by only being worthy if I served others, I only could ever see myself as an extension of someone else, and when I had no one to do so for, I was nothing short of abusive to myself, seeing treating myself with kindness and care as a sign of weakness.

However, Gustave's core being is his empathy and kindness. Though it may not be gentle and soft at all times, his driving force has been caring. For others, the world around him - and it was the complete opposite of a weakness, it's what makes him exceptional. How could I treat myself so awfully for being fundamentally identical to the person that matters the most to me? I was already head over heels with him at this time already, calling him mine and myself his in all circles I ran in, detailing our lives and how they intertwined, and I had been so focused on what was crumbling around me to realize the change within me that he had lit.

It began in small ways I hadn't even caught; choosing clothes that were comfortable rather than performative, making sure to keep up with bathing myself and other personal hygiene things, being able to look in mirrors without feeling utter disgust and hatred. I had begun caring for myself, using his care for me as a guide. Behind every scared decision to do better for myself, to be brave and not give into my vices or illnesses, was Gustave. Whether it was "forcing" myself to eat on days where I didn't feel like I could or refusing to let me speak so cruelly to myself, and the eventual decision to stop cutting myself no matter how bad the urge was, all of it happened from his support and presence in my life.

I mean it point-blank seriously when I say I would not be alive today without him. I have attempted on my life at multiple points, been hospitalized for such, and still struggle with the occasional urge when shit gets tough, and it's Gustave who taught me how to step back from that ledge and keep fighting. Not only because he had planted the seeds for my still growing self-love, but because that light at the end of the tunnel finally had reappeared - and he was the one holding it. No matter how shitty of a day I had, what scars littered my body and where they came from, what baggage that I bring to the table, he would be waiting for me with open arms and nothing but sheer adoration all just for me - and I never had to earn it.

Love to me had always been a painful thing, something I had to fight tooth and nail for, and even when it was all "good", there still was a terrifying feeling that at any second it'd be ripped from me. I felt this way towards everyone, whether family, friends, or past partners, love always was a double edged sword to me. But something, some inexplicable thing, about Gustave completely disarmed me. To this very day, there is only an extreme select few who I truly feel safe with, and he's the top of that very list. With him, love no longer felt like I was being flayed alive, it was very much the opposite.

Words escape me whenever I attempt to describe what Gustave is to me, what I feel for him and vice versa, but the best way I can put it is simply this - he is my home. The epicenter of safety, care, love, belonging, and so, so much more, he is what love is to me, plain and simple. Though I do also have two other f/os I am married to, Gustave is truly who I see as my husband, my life partner, my lover, my other half. I still hesitate on calling myself ficto, but I know regardless of what labels I find myself under, the love we have for each other is raw, deep, serious, and real. No matter what time has in store for us, where we may go or what we may become, I am always 100% certain that we will always be at each other's side.

To share another year with Gustave in any form is an utter gift, no matter what. This last year was a tough one for us, between me needing some heavy surgery, Gustave getting hurt himself, and us moving over 1,000 miles from where I spent most of my childhood, it has been full of roadblocks - but not a single one could tear us apart. It is nothing short of a privilege to me to call myself Gus' spouse, to be able to love him so up close and personally and to be there for him through it all, there is not a single other soul I could ever bare my own to, as we truly are made of the same stardust <3

My angel is 40 now! We've had a relatively quiet and personal day to celebrate, Gustave has never been one for over the top flashiness or even large-scale celebration, but that doesn't mean I haven't been showering him with the utmost love and affection :)c Life is a strange, complex thing that is completely unpredictable, and though there will undoubtedly be hardships in the future, nothing can wipe me off the face of this planet as long as I get to spend each moment here with my Gustave 💙

[rindemption]

a tiny sneak peek at what's going on at my other blog.

I have 20 ocs

...20

I'll get the ones I think I'll talk about the most up and active then I'll do my real, proper announcement about the blog. It's going to be a work in progress for a long time- if I wait until it's fully done it'll be ages so I'll settle for done enough to be functional then finish it on the go

[onetoknowone]

Not to bee greedy but .....i cannot believe i missed we were happy by one night

[nedpng]

what if i change my user name