#// I have no idea what they are talking about shHHhHH

[usagimen]

      "Even I am concerned by the details of such a statement, care to explain more in depth over tea, @achroanimus? I have pastries as well - freshly made"

[cmdrfupa]

Tend to me

Barkeep!Nanami x Salarywomxn!Reader

“That's what I do. I drink and I know things.”

a/n did this come from talking in a server about how post college Nanami needs a job and simping over how hot he’d be with his sleeves rolled up? You bet your ass it did. Thank you Court and Nana for your beautiful brains 🩵💜

MDNI +19

Five rejection emails, no callbacks, and his interview today turned into a scene from a novela after the receptionist barged into the boss's office, exclaiming that she was pregnant. All in the span of one week.

Kento pressed his forehead to the linoleum. table as he groaned.  

“Don't give up! It's like, 10,000 other bank jobs! You'll get one.” Haibara squeezed Kento’s shoulder as he watched his form slump into itself. 

"Yu, it seems like I’ve been turned down for 10,000 jobs. At this rate, I’ll have better luck getting a job as a cab driver.”

“But you don't have a car—”

“Shhhhhh.” Kento turned his head to the side, still keeping it on the table and looking at Yu. 

He knew Yu was trying to help, but it’d be more helpful if he didn't speak.

"Look, Ken. If nothing else comes up, I can talk to my boss to get you hired.” Yu stuffed the last of his tuna onigiri in his mouth, smiling as he attempted to cheer his roommate up. “You won't have my role as a trainer, but you could be one of the guys who clean off the sweaty machines! Pays pretty decent.” 

Clearing his throat, Kento sat up, eyes still closed before he spoke up. 

“Yu.”

“Yeah?” His big brown eyes were only filled with genuine care; Kento looked over at him and sighed.

“Thank you. I'll let you know if I need you to do that.

 Yu gave a toothy grin as he gave Kento a swift pat on the back. “It's all gonna be okay! Just breathe.”

Kento stood with a wry smile. “Thanks. I'm gonna go for a walk. Clear my mind a bit. See you tonight.”

The stroll served its purpose. It reminded Kento he wasn't a poor interviewer, nor did he lack the gusto. The job market was over-saturated and relied heavily on personal connections; Kento did not know a soul in the finance world. 

He stopped; a ‘Now hiring, Inquire within’ sign on a heavily tinted window caught his eye while Gojo watched him from the other end of the FaceTime call.

“Where does that leave you now?”

 “Well, I’ll get some experience in the meantime, become a math teacher or tutor while I look for something more sustainable.” 

"You? A teacher? Nanamin, don’t make me laugh.” Gojo propped his phone up, “You’ll have the students' brains bleeding out if you do that. Think of the children, Ken-doll.” 

Kento rolled his eyes and watched Gojo clean his desk. Literary motifs littered the wall behind Gojo. A large poster of Yevgeny Zamyatin hung in the center. “Math isn't supposed to be fun anyway. It's not teaching Dr. Seuss. It teaches objective truths and concepts.” 

Gojo feigned a yawn. “Wherever there is objective truth, there is satire.”

“That’s not how Wyndham Lewis meant it.”

“You don't know that! He's dead. It's all about interpretation.”

“I’m hanging up now. Gojo. Goodbye.”

Gojo smiled. “I can pull some strings and see if Yaga has a spot in the math department.” he nabbed his phone, seemingly prepping to leave his classroom. 

“And remember dinner this weekend! See you Nanamin!” he blew a kiss into the phone pushing Kento to immediately hang up. 

Kento looked back at the building. The 3-story building had hints of older Japanese architecture with European accents. 

"The Zenith" was carved into a wooden pillar adjacent to the entry, with a simple design. 

“I can just see what they're hiring for. No harm in that.”

The bar inside was the epitome of luxury and sophistication, designed to impress the city’s most discerning clientele. In the hotel's heart, Kento felt out of place. The floor-to-ceiling windows showed breathtaking views of the Tokyo skyline. He waited for the hiring manager to end her dumbfounded stare. 

“So no previous barkeeping history, no customer service work, and no idea how to run a till.” The dark-haired woman named Utahime looked up at Kento. “What qualifications do you have?” 

Smoothing his hair back to think of what he could say to seem qualified, he looked around the room. Older individuals who appear established. Business-minded. 

An older woman, in a meeting, smiling at the blonde-haired man. An older man was on a call. His younger companion crossed her legs and batted her lashes as Kento scanned. 

"I could boost revenue and upsell your best bottles to those who don't care about the price."

“Mr. Nanami. How could you do that? Most of our clientele just order one drink and maybe a listening ear.” 

There were a lot of things Kento lacked but looks were never one of them. The gift of having the perfect genetics made academics a breeze. But, it was now time to use his good looks and gift of gab, inherited from his grandfather. 

“I learn quick. Hire me today and I’ll have every stool filled and the register overfilled in 7 days. I guarantee.” 

Polished, calm, and precise. Nanami excelled behind the bar, his steady hands mixing drinks for the city’s elite. With his sleeves rolled, he perfected the craft of keeping up with mundane conversations mid-shake. His bulging veins, as he held the shaker, made every woman calculate their tip before he served their martinis.  Muscles flexed when he noticed some of the older men who could care less about the young women in cocktail dresses attempting to be mysterious and wanted to know if the blonde keep could do more than be heavy-handed on the gin. 

He was the bar's eye candy, something they should've thought about hiring months ago. 

It's a world where he realized he can control every variable, crafting experiences one cocktail at a time. 

After his first week, they offered him a permanent position. Working midday during the week to keep businessmen and women pleased and one Saturday evening shift a month to keep the younger crowd in.  

The low hum of conversation and soft jazz music filled the dimly lit bar as Kento worked behind the sleek marble counter, expertly mixing another round of drinks for the evening's guests. He wore his usual stoic expression, with the usual white button-down shirt and well-fitting slacks to match. 

He placed a completed cocktail on the bar top, and wiped his hands while checking what needed to be refilled. “Utahime? Could I get some more ice and a few more lowball glasses, please?” he spoke into the earpiece he donned on his left ear. “They seem to be disappearing, and Choso isn't back from his break."

"Yeah. Give me 20. I'm running tables for catering. I'll send it by Takuma.”

“Thanks.”

He wiped down the bar top; a figure slid onto one of the high-backed leather stools in his peripheral with an aura that turned heads without needing to demand attention. 

“What can I get started for you this afternoon?”

“I’ll have a French 75, please. Thank you.” Smooth and assured, your voice rang like a hymnal in his ears. 

Kento gave you a nod, his ability to indulge in small talk temporarily taken from him by your presence. He set to work, measuring gin and fresh lemon juice with his usual care, topped with a flourish of champagne. The drink landed before you in a delicate, chilled glass.

You took a sip, eyes never leaving his. Your nude-colored lips curved into a small but telling smile. "Not bad... but not quite perfect either."

Kento raised an eyebrow, subtly intrigued but keeping his expression neutral. “I take it you have high standards.” 

You chuckled, low and sultry. “I’m a person who knows what she wants, and I don’t settle for anything less.”

Nanami leaned in slightly, his tone dry yet teasing. “Perfection is subjective. Some people might call that 'almost' drinkable."

"Almost isn't in my vocabulary," you replied, eyes gleaming with challenge. You pursed your lips. “Not in business, not in life... and definitely not in drinks.”

He smirked, just enough for you to notice. “I’ll keep that in mind for your next order.”

You swirled the drink in your glass, the fizz of champagne catching the low light as you appraised him. “A man who can admit he’s not perfect? You must have been raised well. Refreshing.”

Nanami met your gaze, unruffled by your attempt to throw him off his game. “I prefer precision over perfection. Perfection tends to make people complacent.”

Your eyes narrowed but with a hint of amusement. “Interesting perspective, coming from someone who works behind a bar.”

He didn’t miss a beat. “Someone has to remind people that the best things in life have room for improvement. Even when they think they’ve already got it all.”

Tilting your head, glancing at the way the simple silver chain rested against his collar. You were impressed but clearly enjoying the game. “You might be onto something. What’s your name?”

“Nanami Kento,” he said simply, as he wiped down the bar.

“Well, Nanami,” your voice is softer but no less commanding, "next time, why don’t you make me a drink that I can’t critique?”

He gave you a rare, almost imperceptible smile. “Challenge accepted.”

Your eyes lingered on each other, the tension electric. You raised your glass, with a smile so poised and self-assured, before taking another sip.

"Looking forward to it," you murmured, low and teasing. Then, you stood and left a 50-dollar tip with your card. You walked away, your perfume lingering in the air.

Kento read your name on the card. His curiosity ran wild with every possible scenario as he watched your backend disappear into the lobby

_

A few days later, the bar's golden lights glowed softly. They reflected off the dark marble counter as Nanami wiped down glasses. His thoughts drifted to the usual routine. He’d swapped shifts, which resulted in watching the evening crowd trickle in, primarily corporate types and high-society guests, and Nanami managed the situation with his typical efficiency and calm demeanor.

But as he adjusted a bottle of whiskey on the back shelf, a familiar presence caught his eye.

You were back.

You entered with the same quiet confidence, this time fitted with a far more casual, sleek outfit paired with heels that clacked against the polished floor. 

Moving with ease, you slipped into the same seat as last time, your gaze meeting his immediately. Your lips curled into a slow smile, almost as if you knew he’d be expecting you. 

“Good evening," Kento greeted, his voice calm with a slight edge of anticipation. 

"Nanami," you replied, leaning forward. Your self-assured energy was hard to ignore. “It's a pleasure to see you tonight. I think I’m in the mood for something a bit more... complex.” 

“Is that so?” he asked, his tone dry but with an undertone of curiosity. “What are we talking about? A Negroni? Maybe a Vieux Carré?” 

You smiled a glint of challenge in your eye. “Surprise me.”

Kento studied you for a moment, then nodded and began his work. 

His movements were precise but fluid as he grabbed a bottle of mezcal and began crafting a Smoky Margarita, layering complex flavors—mezcal for smokiness, lime for sharpness, and a touch of agave to round it out, all topped off with a rim of chili salt. The drink was bold and nuanced, like the woman before him.

He placed the glass in front of you with hushed confidence, waiting for your reaction. 

With a slow sip, your lips brushed against the glass as your tongue sampled the salted rim. Eyes closed momentarily to savor the taste.

When you opened them, your gaze locked onto his. 

“Now this,” you leaned forward, "is much better.”

Kento leaned on the counter slightly, his smirk more visible this time. “Glad to hear it. Looks like I’m learning.”

“Seems like you’re a quick study.”

You held each other’s gaze, the air between thick with tension that had only grown since your last encounter. Your voice dropped to an intimate murmur, barely audible over the ambient music. “So, Nanami... what do you do when you’re not making perfect drinks?”

He raised an eyebrow, amused by the shift in your tone. “I don’t get much free time. I like structure with very little change. But I do have a break coming up.” 

Your smile widened, and there was a glint of mischief in your eyes. “Is that so? And what do you usually do on these breaks?” 

Kento straightened, glancing around the bar. The crowd was calm tonight, his usuals with a small group of beer drinkers. He certainly wasn’t going to be missed if he disappeared a little earlier than usual. “Not very much. But there’s a private spot upstairs. Quiet.” 

“Lead the way.”

Kento signaled for one of the other bartenders, wordlessly handing off duties as he made his way around the bar and approached you. You stood and walked alongside him through the bar.

Turning the corner without paying attention, an inattentive passerby bumped into Kento, a glass of what he could guess was whiskey now soaking the front of his shirt. “Holy shit, sorry.”

“It’s fine.” 

You pressed your lips together, smiling as Kento didn’t let the incident interrupt your determined ascent up the stairs. 

You didn’t speak as you made your way to a barrier, secluded alcove on the mezzanine floor—a quiet corner with a view of the city through tall windows, framed by rich drapes. The world outside was glittering and alive, but here, away from prying eyes, it felt like their own little escape.

Kento stopped near the window, turning to face you as the ambient glow of the city lights bathed them both in soft light. You stepped closer, the subtle scent of your perfume mixing with the full scent of whiskey that stuck to him. He unbuttoned his shirt, uncovering his lean torso and square pecs. 

“You have a talent for choosing the right spot.” You said, your voice lower now. 

“I don’t waste time.” He replied, his eyes locked on yours. 

You smirked, stepping even closer until the space between you was nearly nonexistent. “Efficient. I like that.”

Kento’s pulse quickened though his exterior remained composed. The heat of your presence never wavering as he watched your every move. 

You lightly brushed his arm, a deliberate move to see his reaction. 

“I knew you’d be interesting,” you uttered, your voice soft, teasing, but laced with something deeper. “I just didn’t know how interesting.”

Kento’s lips quirked into a small smile, one that carried more weight than any words he could say at that moment. “You’re not so predictable yourself.”

Your eyes locked. The city lights flickered around you, but neither of you noticed, too caught up in the magnetic pull of something new, something charged. 

You reached up, your hand brushing his collarbone. You licked his whiskey-flavored chest. You languidly licked up to his neck as he sucked in a sharp breath. "Hmm." You whispered while your lips hovered close to his. “I like a man who can keep up."

Nanami’s voice was steady, but there was a rough edge to it now. “I don’t plan on slowing down.”

With a final, knowing smile, he closed the gap between you. His lips brushed yours in a kiss more electric than the city lights below. 

“Nanami Kento.”

“Yes ma'am.”

“When you clock out, my room happens to be on the floor above this one.” You slid your room card into his pants pocket as his hand slid down, pressing you into him. 

Kento pushed you to the wall with a quick yet gentle motion, nudging his knee between your thighs. "You've surprised me."

“How so?" The sudden closeness brought a surge of anticipation bursting in your chest.

"I didn't take you for someone who would enjoy a bit of public play."

You rubbed your wetness on his knee, lost in thought. A simpering moan escaped you. "I don't know what you're talking about, Nanami."

Amused by your attempt to keep it together, he moved his knee forward to elicit another moan from you. "The dampness of my slacks says otherwise." He drowned out the sounds of the late-night rush with the pants he pulled from you.

"Tell me how to please you with precision and I'll follow every direction."

Thank you @/saradika-graphics for the dividers ✨

[sevcasejay1chicago]

Hi! Would you maybe do a fic where the reader tells Kelly he’s going to be a dad? Super cute and fluffy and very excited Kelly.

Baby Severide

Warning: morning sickness/ vomiting, lots of fluff

Authors note: sorry it took so long to get this posted! I just haven’t had the spark to write in a while. Hope you enjoy!!!

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Two days prior to the announcement:

You woke next to Kelly like you do every day. The sun was just shining in and the cool breeze was rustling the curtains. You had nowhere to go today, so you weren’t entirely sure why you were awake. Kelly had canceled everything for the day since you had woken up sick two days in a row and were left feeling awful for most of the day. You soon realized why you were awake.

You untangled yourself from the sheets and shoved Kelly’s arm to the side as you ran for the bathroom. You barely made it in time when your stomach gave in. You had a white knuckle grip on the tank, sobbing as the next wave came up, when Kelly ran in.

“Oh baby.” Kelly sighed sympathetically. He grabbed your wash rag and wet it before coming to pull you down to your knees. “Shhhhhh. Just let it out. You are doing so good.” Kelly soothed, laying the cloth on the back of your neck.

You blindly reached for him, sobbing and hyperventilating as you tried to stop the vomiting. “K-hurk” you tried to call out his name, but a harsh retch cut you off.

“Sh sh sh. Don’t talk. Just focus on breathing baby girl.” Kelly said, taking your hair away from your face and gently rubbing your back as you gripped his pajama pants.

The episode lasted for about 10 minutes before you were finally able to pull away. You fell into Kelly’s arms with a sob. You hate throwing up and have now thrown up three days in a row. You don’t know what’s wrong.

“I gotcha. I gotcha.” Kelly shushed, slightly rocking back and forth. “Shhhhh. It’s okay Angel. You feeling better?” He hummed, kissing your sweaty forehead. You rose your hand and tilted it side to side in response.

“Think your done for now?” Kelly asked, leaning back a little to see your face. You nodded and Kelly smiled at you. “Okay baby girl. Up you go.” Kelly said, pushing you back just enough to stand and then pull you into his arms.

Kelly stopped to let you wash your mouth out a few times and blow your nose. He checked your temp for the third day in a row and hummed at the thermometer. It just couldn’t be right.

“Welp. No fever again baby.” Kelly said, rubbing your sides as you sat on the bathroom counter. “Ready to crawl back in bed or do you want a shower?” Kelly asked, standing between your legs still.

“Bed first. Nap. Shower later.” You said, laying out your plan.

Kelly laughed and lifted you up. “Yes ma’am.” He said, kissing the side of your head before he deposited you onto the bed.

Hours later, you woke to a note from Kelly saying he was going to go help Matt do something and stop by the store. Assuming he’d be back around the time he specified, which was suppose to be 6 pm, you called Kim Burgess.

“Burgess.” Kim answered on the third ring.

“Hey Kim. It’s Y/n. Are you busy at the moment?” You asked, knowing that since it was 4 pm, she could be on the job.

“Nope. Just wrapped up a case. What’s up?” Kim asked, continuing to pack up for the day.

“I need a huge favor. Like, I need this to stay between us until I know for sure.” You said, twisting the sheets in your hands anxiously. You had an idea of what the problem was, now that this had been going on for three days in a row, but you did not feel well enough to leave home.

“I already know. I’ll be there in 20.” Kim said, hanging up.

You chuckled, knowing your best friend probably knew before you did.

Now:

As you suspected, Kim figured out you were pregnant before you or Kelly did. You knew that Kelly didn’t have a clue since he was pretty adamant about not going on shift yesterday, but you promised that you would call him if you needed him and would check in regularly. Since he left, you and Kim had been working on your little announcement.

When Kelly got home the morning after his shift, he was pleasantly surprised to find you sitting on the couch. You had on a red hoodie that he did not recognize, a pillow hugged to your stomach, as you sipped on some coffee.

“Hey sweetheart.” Kelly called, smiling as he eyed you.

You grinned. “Hey handsome. Come join me.” You said, setting your coffee to the side and moving the bag that you had next to you.

Kelly slide into his place, pulling you into his side. “Feeling any better?” He whispered, planting a kiss on your temple.

“About that.” You said, grinning. “I have some news.” You handed Kelly the bag from Walgreens and removed the pillow as he peaked inside. You held back a laugh at his confused face.

“Do we know…” he started to say, pulling out the little firefighter boots, but stopping short as he read your hoodie. “Newest member of squad three.” He read, a smile blossoming on his face as he looked to where the arrow was pointing at your stomach. “Oh my God!” Kelly yelled, grinning from ear to ear. “Are you serious?!”

You nodded, grinning like a fool as tears rolled down your face. “Your gonna be a daddy Kel.” You whispered, voice choked with tears of joy.

Kelly started chuckling and pulled you into a hug. “Baby. This is the best day of my life.” Kelly practically sang, leaning back to look at you, then leaning down to your belly. “Hey fire cracker. It’s your daddy and I am soooo happy you are going to be ours.” Kelly whispered, kissing your stomach.

You held a hand over your mouth, refusing to sob at the sight in front of you. You knew Kelly would be excited, especially given the way he reacted when he held your nephew for the first time.

“How long?” Kelly asked, kissing you quickly.

“Nat says I’m 7 weeks. I just never thought about it since I’m so irregular, but I saw her yesterday after I got a positive home test.” You explained, wiping happy tears from Kelly’s face as he did the same for you.

“When can we tell everyone?!” Kelly asked, practically jumping in his seat.

You chucked, so happy that he was happy. “Whenever your ready.”

Tag list:

@treehouse-mouse

@shadowmeadowsworld

@sorry-i-spaced

@zephyrmonkey

@allisonargent144

@amie134

@lane-rodgers-barnes

@pensfan5871

@dumb-fawkin-bitch

@marvel-and-chicago-fan

@daggersquadphantom

@stellakiddsblog

@100yroldteenagers

@senjoritanana

@celtic-shadow-wolf

[aza-writes]

The Columbia Party

college!matt murdock x reader

Summary: you're a law student at Yale and your friend takes you to a Columbia Law school party one night where you so happen to meet a really cute blind guy

Warnings: use of y/n, few curse words, alludes to future smut

Based on the quote: "Everyone knows that the only real Ivy's are the Holy Trinity; Harvard, Yale, and Princeton" because Blair Waldorf is an icon

requested: no

The music playing in the bar was so loud that you could barely hear the guy standing next to me. His smile was charming but he was trying way too hard to be Mr. Cool Guy. Bragging about how he went to an Ivy League when everyone here is doing the same. I fake smile and giggle, hoping it’s enough for him to buy me a free drink. And I was so close. One more playful touch on his arm and I would be sucking down something strong for free, getting buzzed after a minute. But no. My friend who brought me here, Bre, grabbed my hand and pulled me away into the crowd. 

“You have to meet my friends! You’ll have so much fun with them!” Even with her yelling, her voice is barely audible over the music and loud conversations. She pulls me through the crowd insisting that a quiet spot is only “a little further away.” It wasn’t until after we finished one song, listened to a full one, and started the next that we finally made it to a small corner booth with two guys and a girl sitting there. 

 

"Bre!" the long-haired guy who kinda looks like a hippy yelled toward us. He immediately stands up and hurries over to her. 

Bre grips my hand harder as she walks towards the hippy man. “Foggy! How are you?” She’s speaking louder than usual, indicating the buzz of alcohol in her system. She goes to hug him without letting go of my hand, leaving me awkwardly standing there. 

She finally pulls away after a few long seconds. “This is the girl I was telling you about!” She lets go of my hand and makes a grand gesture to me. “Isn’t she so pretty! I told you she was pretty!” I giggle at her drunk compliments. Bre was the type of girl to brag about her friends but she gets even more affectionate after she’s been drinking. The perfect hype woman. 

I was expecting him to hold out his hand for me to shake, instead, he pulls me into a big bear hug. “I’m Foggy,” he turns and points to a girl at their booth, “That’s Marci, and that one with the glasses is Matt.” 

I wave at everyone. “It’s nice to meet all of you. I’m y/n.” I smile as Bre again grabs my hand and pulls me to the booth to sit down. 

Bre giggles as we sit down, then immediately stands up. “I’m gonna get us drinks!” She smiles and dramatically kisses the top of my head with a “mwah” before she runs back into the crowd to the bar. 

“So,” Foggy breaks the silence, “Bre said you’re in law school too.” 

Matt perks up at this, finally allowing me to see his full face and the upper half of his shoulders. I can’t tell if it’s the alcohol but he has a very pretty face and extremely broad shoulders. Nice muscles too. Before I got to respond, Matt asks another question. 

“You go to Colombia too?” He faces me, with furrowed brows. You can see the wheels in his head spinning but I have no idea what he’s thinking. 

“No, I go to Yale.” I smile softly, uncomfortable with the fact Bre left me with three strangers. I only know Marci from the one time we met. I was staying the night in Bre’s dorm when Marci hurried in and packed an overnight bag to meet up with what Bre refers to as ‘mystery whipped man’ which I now think is Foggy by the way he’s sitting so close to her. 

Marci giggles at this and looks up at Matt. “Oh, this is just perfect!” I look at her confused until she turns to Matt. “Weren’t you just saying that people that go to Yale are-” 

“Shh-” Foggy cuts her off, but that doesn’t stop her. 

“A bunch of pretentious-”

“Shhhhhh!” This time it was Matt trying to get her to stop talking. 

“Assholes.”

My eyes widen. “Oh really?” I look back at Matt. “Everyone that goes to Yale.” 

“That’s not at all what I meant.” His voice is a bit more defensive but nervous beyond everything else. “It’s just a lot of people there are a bit more high class and um,” he looks at Foggy, trying to get his help in the situation. Foggy just sits there and puts his hands up in surrender. “Snobby?” 

“Snobby?”

“Shit that isn’t the right word.” 

“Snobby? Says that guy that goes to Colombia. You probably think that you’re too cool for one of the top law schools in the country.”

Matt scoffs. “Colombia is an Ivy League school, just like Yale.” 

“Oh please, everyone knows that the real Ivy’s are the Holy Trinity; Harvad, Yale, and Princeton.” 

Matt opens his mouth, about to rebuttal, when Bre returns with two Long Island ice teas. 

“Sooo, what did I miss?” She smiles and sits right next to me, trapping me next to Matt. “Is everyone getting along?”

“It’s going just great.” I give her an obviously fake smile before sipping my drink. I’m too sober to deal with any of this right now. 

• • • • • •

An hour passed, as well as two Long Island ice teas, two rounds of shots for the table, and something fruity Bre brought me. I was too buzzed at that point to even ask what it was, but it was good. I was doing relatively okay, drunk enough to feel fine but I could still think logically-ish. Bre on the other hand, was wasted out of her mind. She was so drunk to the point Foggy and Marci had to get her back to her dorm. 

“I’ll drop her off then run back to grab you and Matt.” And with those three leaving, it left me and Matt alone. 

I don’t feel like talking to him and I don’t want to talk to him, but the awkward silence was enough to make me want to bang my head into a wall. I’m honestly considering it. I slowly turn my head to look at Matt who was taking a sip out of his beer. His hands look so good holding the bottle. His jaw tense as he drinks it, his lips wrapped around the opening. 

Fuck he’s hot. 

He pulls me out of my daydream by chuckling a bit as he sets his beer down. 

“What’s so funny?” I’m at that stage of drinking where I say anything that comes to my mind. I can’t tell if I like this part or hate it. 

He just shakes his head and smiles. “I-it’s nothing,” he tries to compose himself but he starts laughing again. 

“Tell me. It’s not like I’m gonna remember it in the morning.” I lie, I’ll remember it perfectly fine. I just want him to tell me. What about this whole thing is so funny he can’t help himself from laughing. 

He chuckles a bit more and turns to me. “Okay then.” He smirks then leans in close. “When I took a drink your heart rate spiked, your skin is hotter, and your breath quickened. You find me attractive, don’t you?” 

My eyes widen. How the fuck did he know that? “Excuse me?” 

He chuckles again. “It spiked again.”

“H-how do you know that? And I don’t. And how the fuck do you know about my heart rate?” 

“Don’t worry about it.” he straightens up, his smirk still lying across his face. 

I wanna smack it off of him… Or fuck it off. 

Only a few seconds after I let that thought slip in, he’s smirking and giggling like a fucking mind reader. 

[testingthewatersss]

Phantom Trigger warnings for PTSD, mentions of war, torture, phantom limb etc. Bucky Barnes x F Reader Oneshot 6200 words fluff, angst, comfort. 18+ MDNI  Some nights are worse than others.

“…Baby…” Y/N grumbles, still half asleep, “…What’s wrong?…”

Bucky barely responds. A whimper escapes his locked jaw, but his eyes are still screwed shut;

“…C’mere…” she yawns, “…It’s okay…”

He’s crying. His chest heaving so violently that it’d woken her.

Her fingers slip up from their place around his waist until she can stroke his cheeks. They’re damp, and hot under her touch-

“Bucky” she says, more vividly awake now, “Bucky, what’s the matter?”

“I-” he gasps, eyes suddenly open and muddled in the dark, “I— g-god… it… it, h-hurts”

“What hurts?” Y/N asks, urgency slipping into her tone, “Baby, talk to me”

“My shoulder” he says, gritting his teeth, “It- it’s burning”

Oh…

She sighs, sympathy washing over her in one aching wave

“The whole arm… the wh-whole thing is throbbing… I- I can’t…”

He’s panting, clearly trying to catch his breath despite the pain he’s in.

“C’mere… Bruce said to try and move it, remember?”

“I can’t” he sobs, “I- I can’t, doll— It- it hurts so damn bad—”

She nods, understanding. She lets one of her hands drop down, tracing the angry red seam of his scar so lightly she’s barely touching him.

He barely seams to notice.

“Try your fingers…” she whispers, moving in even closer to his front, “…Open and close your fist”

Bucky feels a gentle kiss against his brow, and then, as he tries his best to focus— To make his metal knuckles even twitch — he can’t help but groan in despair.

It really is agony. The entire limb is consumed in a cloud of hot, aching, numbness, and the scar that attaches it to his body feels like it’s tearing open all over again.

“Breathe” Y/N instructs, tone blessedly calm, “In… and out, baby…. I’m right here with you, it’s okay…”

and just like that, he’s starring at her. Wide blue eyes shining in the dark as tears continue to stream down his cheeks.

He tries to inhale, to exaggerate his breathing in an effort to please her, but a sob claws at his throat at just the wrong time, and he ends up humiliated and spluttering as she lets her hand float back over to his brow.

“I know it hurts” she soothes, “It’ll pass… it always does.”

She’s right. Of course she’s right, but it doesn’t help ease the pain he’s in now.

He’s still sobbing, too, which doesn’t help-

“Fingers” she reminds him softly, tiredness heavy in her tone, “Squeeze my hand”

When he realises that the hand that’s not cradling his face is laced with his metal one, he cries harder. He can barely feel it. He can barely feel her hand, and he can’t take that at all—

“…One, two, three…” she counts, tightening her fingers around his in sync with the numbers, “…One, two, three…

His eyes are closed again, now.

Screwed up tight, jaw locked.

—One— Two— Three—

He’s trying desperately to feel the pressure against his palm. To make his fingers move past the deep, cramping, numbness.

Y/N can tell how hard he’s trying.

She knows that means that this episode is a bad one. She treats him to another kiss against his brow, and then, she feels it.

The slightest twitch against her thumb.

“Good” she praises instantly, “that’s your thumb, baby… let’s work with that…”

“Jesus christ-” he sobs, “—It… it’s never been th-this bad before”

“You spent all mornin’ in the gym with Rodgers” she reminds him calmly, “Maybe you over did it”

She’d warned him about that.

He remembers. Her concern, sweetened with a smile, and finally a kiss, when he’d promised her he’d be just fine—

and now, he’s bawling. Hysteria bleeding through the cracks of his previous state of quiet suffering at the mere idea of having disappointed her some how.

“Shhhhhh” Y/N coos, lips back against his brow, “Shhh… shhhh…shhh, baby, you’re okay…. it’s going to pass, I promise…”

“-I— fuck, I- I’m sorry, doll, I— I didn’t think-”

“Don’t be sorry” she cuts in, squeezing his hand again, “Everythin’s alright”

He swallows hard and redirects all of his energy into moving his hand again, into curling his fingers around hers in a hopeless display of attachment.

Holding her hand had been the first way he’d been able to show her any kind of physical affection at all. After spending so long either being kept in total isolation, or in varying states of torture he remembers the feeling of bliss the innocent display of skin on skin (or skin on metal) had filled him with.

He needs that kind of relief now. He needs the comfort it can offer him more than anything—

“Baby” Y/N whispers, “You’ve got to breathe for me”

He’s only getting more and more worked up. The pain he’s in being mixed with, and overwhelmed by panic and distress.

“I- I- I need you” he pants, hysterical again, “I, I need- I need to feel you please… p-please…”

And now he’s looking at her again, and her heart is breaking, and she’s moving, guiding him in, impossibly closer towards her chest before he can continue his desperate pleading.

“I’m here, I’m right here-” she promises, feeling his nuzzling into the crook of her neck, “-I’m not goin’ anywhere-”

“Shit-” he gasps, “-shit, I— can… can I h-hold on, doll, p-please?”

“Sure you can” she purrs, feeling his flesh arm snaking it’s way beneath her, “Did you get any sleep?”

“I think so” he mumbles, voice vibrating against her throat, “it’s been achin’ for a while but, god— it- it woke me up and it’s not gettin’ better, I— I didn’t mean to wake ya-”

“Don’t worry about waking me up” she tells him, adjusting to their new position.

He’s half-way on top of her, one arm willingly trapped beneath her back, and the other, is still draped lamely across her waist, with one of her hands still tangled with useless metal, whilst she palms at the back of his ribs to soothe him whilst he cries.

“…One… Two… Three…” Bucky hears her whisper, “…One… Two… Three…”

“O-one…two— three…” he mimics, trying to make himself feel the pressure he knows she’s putting on his palm, “One— two.. three…”

“That’s your thumb, again” she tells him fondly, “That’s it, baby, keep going… Well done…”

“…I can’t feel it…” he tells her wetly, “…I can’t feel…”

“I know” she whispers, “You will love, it’ll come back”

Bucky is good at pain. He has a military grade assault weapon soldered to his central nervous system, and even though this isn’t the sharpest agony he’s felt over the years— It hurts. It really just hurts.

and he’s crying, and trying desperately to make his thumb move.

It shouldn’t be this hard.

He makes a loud, frustrated, sound, and Y/N is quick to hush him;

“Baby, breathe it out—” she whispers, “—you can’t just force it…”

She’s half expecting him to snap at her. To tell her that he is breathing, that he’s trying his best;

But, no—

He looks at her, wide-eyed and tearful as he collapses down into a pitiful stream of sobs.

Irritation would’ve been better.

Anything would’ve been better.

She feels her whole chest burning as he sniffles silently against her neck, resolve shattering completely.

“C’mere” she murmurs, pulling him closer towards her front, “you’re breaking my heart…”

Bucky whimpers like a wounded stray, trying his best to move with her, to burry his face against her skin until everything just stops.

It’s too much, he’s too tired.

He hasn’t slept well in days. Even with her next to him, he’s been tossing and turning and aching and dreaming—

“You’re exhausted…” she notes, and he finds himself wondering if she can actually read his mind, “…baby, does it hurt too much for you to go back to sleep?”

“Yeah” he confesses, choking on the words, “It- it’s real bad this time”

“Are you cold?” she wonders, concerned, “I can get more blankets, or FRIDAY can turn the heat up”

“I d-don’t know, doll, I— I j-just w-want it to stop…”

God, there’s that burn again, deep in her chest, behind her ribs.

Her heart is breaking in real time.

“Let me see” she purrs, instinct taking over, “Can I touch it, love? I’m not goin’ to hurt you, I promise.”

I’m not going to hurt you.

He’s heard that before. Hundreds of times- and it’s almost always been followed by cruelty.

He trusts her though, more than anyone, and her voice kind, and calm and he’s nodding, sniffing and crying lamely into the crook of her neck whilst her hand slips up to the scar on his shoulder.

The skin is burning hot.

It’s red, and angry, even in the dark.

“God, Buck” she sighs, sympathy thick in her tone, “I think somethin’ must have knocked it, or maybe you pulled it some how. Did you miss a punch or anythin’ like that?”

“Maybe?” he snivels, “I d-don’t know, I— I didn’t w-want to hurt him, s-so I— I try not to use it b-but I can’t— I can’t al-always-”

“You can’t always help it” she agrees, “It’s not your fault…”

Her fingers are trailing across the wound. She can feel the texture of scar tissue pulled tight across muscle and metal plates. She can feel heat pulsing out from the joint as her thumb floats over a bump that feels suspiciously like a screw hidden under his skin.

“I…I th-think I used it to, to jump from a frame?” he offers weakly, “I w-was on-only messin’ around with Rodgers, I- I didn’t think a-about it-”

“You’re not goin’ in and out of cryo anymore” she replies calmly, “it’s not as tough as it was when you were, baby, not yet, anyway— You’ve got to lay off it for a couple more months at least… it’s so fresh, it never got chance to heal right…”

Bucky thinks she sounds affectionate when she’s talking about it.

About the hideous metal limb that was soldered to his body to stop him from bleeding out and to keep him useful;

He doesn’t understand how she doesn’t hate it like he does.

“That’s your thumb again” she whispers, suddenly, “are you trying to hold my hand?”

It’s not flickering against hers, anymore. Now, it’s still, curled around her.

“Y-yes” he admits, embarrassed and still sobbing-

“Okay” she whispers, “Okay, good job.”

She squeezes his palm encouragingly as her free fingers continue to trace his scar, soothing the tender skin with a gentle, well practiced touch.

Bucky closes his eyes again and tries to shake the fog from his mind.

He just feels broken right now. He just wants to hold her hand. He thinks that he could handle any amount of pain as long as he could feel her fingers around his.

She’s his safe space. She’s been his safe space for as long as he’d known her, and now, he’s clinging to her in every way he can and it doesn’t seem like enough.

He’s panicked. He’s hurting. He’s crying like a baby and he can’t make himself stop—

“That’s good” Y/N praises suddenly, feeling his pinky finger moving now too, “That’s a finger, too… you’re getting there, baby…”

She presses her lips against his temple, because it’s the part of his face that he can reach, and lets her palm flatten across his scar, just feeling it throb under the contact.

It seems softer than it had when she’d started touching it, but, so does the rest of him.

His muscles have relaxed, cramp inducing stiffness forget in favour of complete, submissive surrender.

He just wants to cry in her arms. Even the desire to stay tense, to stay guarded and ready for the pain he’s in to increase is no match for the way he just wants to be held by the woman he loves.

“C-c-can y-you t-touch my arm?” he requests shyly, “p-pl-please, I- I w-want to try and feel it…”

“Sure” Y/N whispers, letting her palm float from his scar, all the way down across his bicep, and finally his wrist, before making it’s way back up.

He shivers. It just aches.

Bruce had called it ‘phantom limb’

He’d said it’s common in people who’d had traumatic amputations.

He said it’s his brain trying to reconnect the nerves from the arm that’s no longer there, and that usually it’s only described as a ‘strange’ type of pain. Like an ache or an itch that you can’t soothe, because the arm, or the leg, or the foot is gone.

But his case is more complicated, because the nerves that were left over had been wired into the metal-work of the new arm so that he could feel and lift and fight with it without someone having to programme extra data into the already limited technology.

So those nerves are still there, still firing signals to his brain, but now they’re stuck in a mess of vibranium, trying to let him know that this hurts that it’s too heavy, and that it needs to get off so they can heal, but they can’t and the old arm is gone, but his brain doesn’t know that, because it can’t and it’s feeling the pain of that, but losing the feeling of the replacement, and it-

“It’s too much” he whispers, “th-this is… it’s too much, I- I can’t… I can’t”

“You” Y/N soothes, continuing to run her fingers up, and down the limb, “Don’t have to do, anything, baby… Just breathe… cry if you want to, and let me look after you, I’m right here… you’re safe, you can just settle…”

She’s telling him he can just be, with her. That she doesn’t mind if he cries, and doesn’t sleep, and he loves her, more than anything in the world.

“I’m right here” she whispers again, “baby, I can feel your thumb, I’m not goin’ anywhere, you must be worryin’ about somethin’”

He’s more than worrying, really. He’s terrified that she’s going to leave him. That he’s going to snap back to somewhere terrible, where he’s totally alone, suffering in the dark with nobody coming to do anything other than make it worse— He doesn’t know how she knows that though— How she always seems to know, but god, he’s grateful. He’s grateful because he needs to hear her telling him that she’s staying.

The pressure his grip is putting on her hand is impressive considering not only how weak it was before, but also, because it’s only coming from his thumb and last finger.

It’s almost painful, but she doesn’t even consider pulling away, even a fraction. She just squeezes his palm again, before letting the hand that had been trailing across his arm move over to his hair.

He whinges as she strokes a curl back behind his ear, letting out a stream of sad, needy little noises as she starts to soothe him that way;

“I’m callin’ in sick today…” she tells him calmly, “…I’ll have FRIDAY do it later, and then, we can spend the day gettin’ some rest…”

Before he can open his mouth to object— To apologise, and plead for her not to change her habits because he’s so unstable, she’s kissing his temple again,

“I’m taking care of you” she says firmly, “I’m making lunch, and dinner, and you can have all the cuddlin’ you want, sweetheart, you are long overdue some skin on skin…”

and then, she feels it.

3 vibranium fingers are clutching her hand, now. Sure, that’s including the thumb, but still, it’s progress.

“Sweet boy” she whispers, voice dripping with affection, “That’s it, good job”

Bucky’s head is ringing now. He can hear her, he can hear his own fractured crying, too.

Despite that, her praise washes over his chest like a balm. Cooling the hot swell of panic that had been slowing building since he’d been woken by the searing pain of his arm.

He doesn’t know what he’s doing to earn her approval, or the sweet terms of address she’s treating him too, but he definitely does’t want to stop.

“You’re okay” he hears her whisper, “I’m sorry it’s hurtin’ so much, it’ll pass soon, I promise.”

She listens to him sniffling, sad, tired sounding sobs vibrating against her throat as he tries to make himself grow quieter, and all she can think to do is squeeze his palm again.

“Shhh, shhhh, shhhhh” she hushes, over and over again, “shhhhhh, shhhh, shhhhhh”

The rhythmic pattern of her exhaling is almost as comforting as the way she’s still stroking his hair.

He releases in a sudden moment of clarity that he’s so totally in love, that if she was to reach over and take out the knife he knows she keeps in her dresser and slit his throat, he wouldn’t even flinch.

“I love you” doesn’t seem like nearly a serious enough statement to convey the real depth of his feelings for her, but he says it anyway, “doll, I- I love y-you so much”

“Oh, baby” she murmurs, fingers slipping round from his hair to his cheek, “I love you too, you know that, don’t you? You know how much I love you…”

Do I?, he thinks, muddled, She… she must love me, because she’s here… she’s takin’ such good care of me, even after all this time…

“I think so?” he says uncertainly, “m-my head is… is real messy tonight, doll— I- I’m sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry” she counters quickly, “It’s just tryin’ to keep you safe, it’s workin’ real hard and we already know you’re exhausted”

“I… I feel safe” he says, realising as the words leave his lips that it’s the truth, “I always feel safe with you… I- I a-always have…”

Y/N feels herself beaming in the dark as the shattered pieces of her heart knit back together.

“Good” she whispers, emotion plain to hear, “Good, baby, because you are safe… you’re so, so, safe…”

He knows that. He really knows that.

That is why he’s letting himself cry, and admit to the pain he’s in.

Weakness is only okay when he’s safe, because weakness used to mean terrible, terrible things were coming.

He’s nodding, tears drying against her skin, now, too, from where he’s spent so long nuzzling into her throat.

“I can feel all your fingers gettin’ stronger, baby, can you feel my hand yet?”

She squeezes his palm and he exhales long and deep and relieved.

“Yes” he says, “Yeah, I- I can.”

“Good” she replies, pecking a kiss against his brow, “That means it’s gettin’ better… keep movin’ them as much as you can and it should speed things up.”

“I don’t want to let go” he tells her weakly, “I’m scared.”

I’m scared.

That breaks her heart.

“Baby” she whispers, “What of, huh?”

“Y-you bein’ gone—” he pants, honest and exposed, “—me le-lettin’ go and w-wakin’ up in… in a c-chair or- or o-on a table all, all on my own”

The broken pieces of her heart burn behind her ribs. Her whole chest tightens in response.

It’s so painful she has to take a second to steady herself before she replies, because she doesn’t trust her voice not to crack;

“Can you look at me?”

Bucky edges his face up shyly. There’s no distance between them, really, and by the time he can actually see her, their noses are almost touching.

He feels disgusting. Tears are cold and fowl against the hot, red skin of his cheeks, and he can feel his pulse throbbing in his temples.

Still, he watches her. Sore, blue eyes focusing intently on her face.

“I’m right here” she says strongly, “You are never, ever, going goin’ back to bein’ on your own like that… I promise.”

“S-sometimes” he gulps, “Sometimes wh-when I close my eyes I- I don’t k-know where I am, and I— I ha-ave to hold on, I- I don’t want to let go, n-not right now, doll — I— I d-don’t want to go back there…”

She can’t protect him from his mind. No matter how badly she wants too, she can’t do a thing to stop him from dreaming about isolation, and torture and suddenly, the idea of asking him to relax his grip on her, feels a lot like asking him to submit to that experience willingly.

“You can hold on” she says, tightening her fingers around his, “you don’t have to let go… Sweetheart, you can always hold on okay? You can always hold on to me…”

and he is holding on, his flesh arm is curled under her body and even that is tightening, tugging her close to his front.

“I— I- love you” is all he manages to say before he starts sobbing, again.

He’s hurting, and tired, and done being brave for right now.

His face falls back to the crook of her neck and he starts weeping.

It’s hot, and wet, and untempered.

Y/N knows better than to ask him to quiet down. She knows that the fact he feels able to just let go like this is a testament to how safe he feels with her.

It doesn’t make it easier to listen too, though.

She contents herself by hushing him. By running her free fingers through his hair, carding it back gently as she tries her best to just soothe him any way she can.

Bucky can feel himself slipping. Every inch of him hurts. He’s tried and crying, and scared and all he wants to do is cling on to the one thing in the world that makes him feel safe and he can’t even do that properly.

He feels useless, and weak, and like he’s about to fall even though he’s almost one hundred percent sure that that’s impossible.

Y/N wouldn’t let me fall anyway, he thinks desperately, She’d never—

But, but what if she lets go?

I can’t hold on, not well enough, not with one arm, and she… she might not think about it—

No, No— That can’t happen— he’s barely hanging onto sanity as it is, and losing the stability she’s offering, losing the feeling of arms around him, and her fingers in his hair—

No. No. No.

He’s suddenly choking on air, again.

“D-Don’t l-let go” he begs, hysteria forcing the words past his lips in a blur— “D-Do-d-don’t—p-please… p-please y-you c-can’t l-let go..”

Y/N feels her brow furrow. She can barely make out his words through the mess of his sobbing, but she wants to hear, to answer him if she can;

“Baby” she whispers, “I can’t hear you… take a breath for me…”

“P-please” he chokes, trying not let himself lose it completely “Please, -doll, d-don’t let g-go…I- I c-can’t a-and I-I need y-you t-to h-hold on—”

Her heart burns behinds her ribs as he speaks. As she hears him pleading with her to hold him because he can’t hold onto to her.

“…Oh, love…” she sighs, shaking her head, “…Don’t worry ‘bout that…”

He is worried though, he’s very worried.

He can’t say anything though, not when he can barely breath.

He settles for starring at her instead.

Wide, blue eyes focused on her face as tears run down his cheeks in hot uneven rivets.

His nostrils are flaring, lower lip quivering as he tries and fails to tighten his metal fingers around her hand, again.

She hasn’t seen him this blatantly terrified in weeks.

“Hey, sweetheart…” she whispers, “…talk to me, huh… you look so scared…. so, so scared… can you tell me why?”

He whines, a pathetic, shallow stream of whimpers leaving his throat as he tries to focus on her question;

“Hmmmm?” she presses, hand slipping from from his hair to his brow, and then down, to cradle his cheek as his jaw starts to shake, “I know it hurts, I know you’re tired, but somethin’ else is goin’ on in there isn’t it?”

Her thumbs are tracing his temples now, and he’s hanging on her every word.

“I… I’m s-scared” he agrees weakly, “I- god, I- I’m scared.”

Y/N nods, knowing how hard it is for him to express himself sometimes.

She gives him a minute, watching as his eyes over flow again,

“Can you tell me why?” she presses when his sobs start to slow, “Sweet, sweet boy…”

“It…” he murmurs, “It’s s-tupid”

“No” she counters, “it’s not”

She sounds so sure, that he finds himself gulping, readying himself to tell her;

“F-fa-fallin”

Her head tilts, she presses her lips against his cheek, and waits for him to try again.

“Fallin’…” he whispers, “I- I’m ss-scared of falling…”

That hurts.

It feels like a steel dagger through her chest. It twists as she sees his eyes drop, a fresh layer of shame in his face.

“Right now?” she checks, fingers running over his cheeks.

He nods, and lets himself be wracked by a pitiful bout of sobbing.

“Oh, baby” she sighs, wrapping her arm back around his shoulders, “You know I’d never let you fall…”

She’s not telling him he can’t fall. She’s not reminding him of logic, or telling him that he’s being stupid, or— anything, like that. She’s just holding him as he nods again.

He knows she wouldn’t let him fall. He knows that, and that-

“Th-that’s wh-why you can’t let go” he stammers, “I- I can’t h-ho-hold on, and I need too… I need too.. s- so please d-don’t don’t l-let go…”

“…I’m not letting go…” she swears, “…Sweetheart… C’mere, you’re okay…”

Y/N can feel her heart breaking in her chest as she ushers him impossibly closer. As she guides his face even tighter against her neck, lacing her fingers through his hair.

It’s almost made worse by the way that he’s not even trying to stifle the noises he’s making. He’s whimpering, and sobbing and clutching onto her with his one good arm.

She has to fight every instinct she has. Every single one is telling her to hush him- To tell him to settle down, and stop crying so hysterically, but she can’t. She can’t do that, because she knows just how hard it is from him to let go in the first place.

It’s taken him a long time to feel safe enough to show weakness like this. To not burst blood vessels trying to hold back the urge to cry out, to not strain the muscle in his jaw from locking it so tightly—

“I- I’m sorry” he splutters, because he is, he really, truly is, “I-I c-can’t—”

“Shhhhh” she breathes, relishing in the opportunity to soothe him, “you don’t have to be sorry, baby…”

Bucky disagrees, really.

He’s crying. He’s shaking, and he can’t stop, and he shouldn’t have woken her up in the first place, and now he’s keeping her up because he’s broken and scared and—

“Oh, g-god doll, I—” he stammers, “— I’m s-orry”

“I know” she agrees, knowing that brushing it off isn’t helping, “I know you are, but you haven’t done anything wrong…”

His list is burning behind his eyes even though they’re screwed shut.

“Is your arm still hurting you?”

The concern in her voice is thick and obvious. His self-loathing swells as he struggles to flex his fingers, again.

It’s difficult. They’re stiff and unyielding, and the whole left side of his body is aching now. Random moments of agony splintering out from his spine, across his flank.

Lying crosses his mind. He thinks that he should reassure her, tell her not to worry, but then, he feels her arms tightening around him. He feels her lips against his head, pressing kisses against his hair, and the idea of hiding anything from her is impossible.

She feels him nod a split second before she hears the weak little “Yes” that he manages to force past his lips.

“Okay, baby… maybe we should change positions, huh? take the pressure off your shoulder.”

It’s clear that he’s unhappy with her suggestion. Both of his fists tighten around her body in a way that is clearly not deliberate.

At least his hand seems to be working again, she thinks dryly, Even if he’s not doing it on purpose.

“Sweet, sweet boy” she soothes, “Let me look after you, okay? I’m not going to let go, I promise, but we’ve gotta try and get you a little more comfortable…”

Again, he makes himself nod before he can verbally convey his agreement.

“C’mon then” she sighs, preparing herself to manoeuvre his body, “Just relax for me…”

In his defence, Bucky does try. He does his best not to tense up, but the second her front slips away from him, his whole body grows taught, hating how exposed he suddenly feels.

Wide, blue eyes are starring at her the second his face is revealed.

They only grow more panicked as she uncurls her arms from around his body, stroking his cheek instead.

“Shhhhhh…” she exhales, caressing his jaw, “…I’m right here, you’re okay…”

He suddenly looks very small.

That’s ridiculous, really. He’s huge, much bigger than Y/N, and his muscles are taught and glistening, but despite his obvious strength he just seems so incredibly vulnerable.

And then, she can’t help but picture him like this, in different, less safe circumstances.

The image of him lying exposed, on some cold metal surface, waiting for people to come and hurt him— To come and torture him or, or tease him, or scream orders in his face, blinding her for a moment.

No wonder they kept a mask on him, she thinks, He’s too easy to read.

“…Baby boy…” she whispers, thumb brushing across his lower lip like a kiss, “…You wanna talk to me?…”

Bucky sniffles, blinking up at her and trying not to give in and draw her thumb into his mouth in a primal attempt at self-comfort.

He feels his jaw quivering, as he tries to make himself speak, and when he finally does, all scraps of his usual boyish charm are lost in the waver in his voice;

“I- I h-ate this, doll”

She nods considerately, fingers trailing across his face in obvious act of adoration.

“I know you do” she promises, “It’s okay”

Everything about her is so gentle. Her touch, her tone, the way she’s looking at him, every ounce of her presence is protective and loving, and he can’t stop starring at her, trying to capture every second of it.

“Deep breathes for me, huh? While you’re on your back, try and let your ribs relax a little…”

He does his best to obey. Lips parting as he tries to deepen his inhalation.

Y/N smiles at him as he splutters out the exhale, and nods encouragingly as he winces, adjusting to the way his ribs aren’t currently being compressed by his position.

4 of them are vibranium, and all of them have been broken at least once. He’s so used to half-breathes that full ones feel strange.

It aches. It makes him want to cough, which only makes it more uncomfortable, but he knows that shallowness isn’t his friend, especially when he’s crying.

And he is still crying. It’s just silent now, tears melting against Y/N’s fingers as she strokes across his skin.

“You’re lookin’ real lean, sweetheart”

Her gaze is flitting across his chest, eyes lingering on the sharp outline of his muscles, on the ridges caused by the imprint of his ribcage.

His metabolism runs fast, and if she hadn’t spent so long around Steve, she might not have noticed that there’s anything unusual about the way there isn’t an ounce of fat on him anymore, but she has. She has spent a long time around Steve, and, besides that, she’s spent even longer around Bucky. Bucky, who hasn’t been eating properly because he’s used to being fed on a schedule by handlers who cared less about if he was hungry and more about maintaining his optimum physical condition.

“Lean?” he echos, voice shaking.

There’s a crease between his brow. She leans down to kiss it, fingers dropping from his chin, to his chest.

He feels her tracing the outline of his ribs and suddenly feels himself flush with insecurity.

“I don’t think you’re eating enough” she murmurs, pecking his cheek, and hovering above his lips, “Are you hungry, baby?”

Her lips are so close to his, she’s teasing him with the promise of a kiss. With the promise of indulgence, and he’s still trying to deepen his breathing, and her hands are still real low—

“I d-don’t know” he admits, voice almost inaudible, “Maybe?”

“Maybe” she repeats, leaning in to press her lips against his, treating him to a moment of bliss before pulling back just enough to prompt his flesh arm to reach up, holding her close.

Y/N smiles, nose rubbing his as his palm opens and closes against her waist.

“Bucky” she whispers, “Please, promise me that you’ll try and eat a little more during the day?”

Worry is back in her voice. Concern mixing with affection as she goes back to stroking his cheek.

and then he’s nodding, gulping, and simpering and replying with an “I promise” that she rewards with another precious kiss.

“I know it’s not easy” she allows, “I know you’re out of practice, but you’ve gotta take care of yourself… or at least let me take care of you, okay?”

‘Let me take care of you’

Her words echo through his head like a prayer. Swirling amongst the swell of incoherent panic that had been filling it before, fighting back against the bitter sting of pain and that seemed so all encompassing;

He could take any amount of pain if she was there to hold him like this after it was done.

He would take any amount of pain, if it meant that. He’d willingly submit to anything, if it would result in her soothing him this way;

“Please” he breathes, “Please look after me, I- I can’t ri-ght now…and I— I trust you”

The sincerity in his voice hits her like a bullet, and suddenly nothing else in the world matters. Nothing apart from him, and his whispered plea.

She nods, kissing him again before moving to guide him round, helping him shift so that he’s on his side, back against her front, with his metal arm draped carefully over his waist. She moves in closer, knowing how much he relishes her touch, and then she nuzzles into the angry seam of his shoulder, urging it to settle now that there’s no weight on it at all.

One of her arms is mirroring his vibranium one, curling over his ribs so that they’re fingers can lace together at his navel, and the other is up stroking his hair as she presses more kisses against the back of his head.

“Try and get some rest now, sweetheart” she soothes, already knowing that her aim of relieving some of the tension in his body is working, “and when you next wake up, we’ll take a shower, and get breakfast, okay?”

Bucky just nods. Surrendering completely to how hopelessly nice it is to just be held. To be held, and not have to worry about doing anything, because if he has to do something, then she’ll tell him.

His breathing is easier now, too. This new position is a happy medium. His lungs can expand, and his chest feels much less tight, but it doesn’t feel as exposed as lying on his back. He’s still tucked up against her, he’s still holding her hand and feeling her body curled around his in a way that’s awfully protective.

“I love you” is the last thing she hears him say, before he settles into a pattern of deep breathing.

She beams against his hair and tell him that she loves him more, ignoring the shake of his head that her comment earns. She thinks about arguing with him about it. About all the playful ways she could counter his refusal, but instead, she decides to let him have the win.

He hasn’t had enough of those lately. He hasn’t had any, really.

“You win” she concedes, “but I do love you a whole lot, Barnes, more than I could ever tell you, anyway.”

Bucky feels his whole chest swelling with sheer bliss when he hears that. When he hears her, and realises that he believes her.

He has no doubt that she really does love him as much as she says, and that is why he manages to fall back to sleep, despite the aching numbness that had woken him still being very present in his arm.

Y/N doesn’t follow suit. Not right away, anyway.

She stays awake, eyes trained on her partner until she’s sure that he’s settled, which isn’t nearly as quick as you’d think.

Even though he’s sleeping, she thinks his brow looks awfully tight some times.

Every few minutes, a crease will appear between his eyes, his legs might twitch, too, and or his fist will tighten.

and she’ll react.

She’ll whisper out a line about how well he’s doing while she strokes her fingers through his hair to soothe him.

It works well, too.

His body relaxes in response to her voice, and then, he’s back to looking peaceful until the next time his jaw locks.

When the gaps are finally longer between, Y/N lets her eyes flutter shut, relying on instinct to know when to hush the man she’s still very much holding.

That works just as well. The arrangement is clearly well practiced.

So well practiced that Bucky doesn’t wake again until late into the morning.

Masterlist

[hydr0phius]

Some crack summaries (and just general notes) of Greater Good like how I did with Chaos Rising

Ar'alani: We have technology to aim our weapons with but I'm going to just eyeball this shot here.

...

Thalias: *enters the bridge, is exhausted*

Samakro: Wow, you look like shit.

Thalias: Thanks so much. I really appreciate that.

...

The side of Thaliamakro in this book has me giggling and kicking my feet. If they don't get together romantically I am still here for the friendship. I love them skdjfhsdjf. SAMAKRO SHE'S NOT A SPY THOUGH, MATE-

...

Laknym & Thalias: *open their mouths to explain something to Che'ri or to ask a question of each other while they're down in secondary command*

Kharill: SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Thalias: We're-

Kharill: SHHHHHH. NO. NO TALKING. SHUSH.

...

The ominous things being hinted at about the Stybla family's past (the most vicious warriors etc). I'm intrigued. Tell me MORE.

...

*Samakro & Thrawn talking about keeping the Magys on the Springhawk & it's low key an argument*

Samakro: And what do you suppose the Syndicure will think of this?

Lakinda, internally: I hope I don't get dragged into this.

Thrawn: Actually, I wasn't going to tell them *looks at Lakinda*

Lakinda, now officially in the argument: Uhhhh

...

Lakinda: STUPID THRAWN TAKING ALL THE DAMN GLORY!!!!! I DISLIKE THIS MF-

...

Thalias: *wakes up*

The Magys in hibernation:

Thalias: Who the fuck put that the- wait, I said Thrawn and Samakro could put it here. Uh. *proceeds to dress for the day throwing side eye looks at the hibernation chamber and wondering if the magys is just suddenly going to wake up and jump scare her (she's not)*

...

Thalias: *opens the door*

Che'ri, instantly looking inside: WHat's ThAt-

Thalias: A coffin!

Che'ri:

Thalias:

Che'ri: That's a bit weird.

Thalias: The Magys is in hibernation to stop her from offing herself.

Che'ri: o h.

...

Ba'kif: *giving the new orders for Thrawn to be shifted out to the Paataatus again, except there's a lot of political shit going on at the same time*

Samakro: *needling for a bit more info in a subtle way*

Thrawn: *no fucking idea what's happening, but not too pleased about going to the Paataatus hive-home world when he's got a Magys in hibernation in Thalias' room and a puzzle to solve back on Sunrise*

...

Jixtus having music and beanbags at his meeting with Haplif. Haplif struggling to get out of the beanbag with dignity. Jixtus telling him he should bird watch more often.

...

Thurfian: *frothing at the mouth with sheer rage after hearing about the scuffle over Sunrise with the unknown dreadnaught + Lakinda's assistance*

Zistalmu: *approaches*

Thurfian, internally: What if I just laid into him? What if I gave him a verbal lashing? A bit of a tickle up? I'd feel better if I tore something to shreds-

(Also Thurfian): Don't do that. Focus on the end game. FOCUS ON THE END GAME.

Zistalmu: You look happy.

Thurfian: Fuck you-

...

Lakjiip: Look at this *hands Lakuviv the metal report from the Agbui jewellery*

Lakuviv:

Lakuviv: THat's fucKING NYIX ALLOY-

Lakjiip: I KNOW

...

Haplif: *does anything*

Lakphro: What are you planning??? I'll find out. I'll know-

...

Lakjiip: Tell no one of these brooches.

Lakphro: Of course.

*later*

Lakphro: *calls his cousin who is married to a scientist who has connections with other scientists that work with metals etc* Hey so there's this jewellery I'm going to send it to you in the mail-

...

Lakbulbup: Send it through express post.

Lakphro: Have you SEEN the rates for that lately????

...

Qilori of fucking Uandualon. Back again and causing havoc we're all going to see later. He's going to be the reason the skywalkers are targeted by the Grysk, isn't he...

...

Shimkif: Marry me.

Haplif: wHAt-

Shimkif: It'll gain Yoponek and Yomie's trust. It'll be fake too

Haplif: Oh ok.

...

Shimkif: Sorry I was gone so long. I was busy poisoning birds.

Haplif: Amazing.

Yomie: I found another migration up north.

Haplif, internally: No the hell you did not-

...

Haplif: I don't like birds. I've had enough of birds.

Shimkif: *poisons Yomie*

Haplif: Nice, we're out of here.

***

RIP Yomie, you had the brains to figure the Agbui out, but your silly fiancé did not and now we're in a bit of a pickle. Haplif giving Yoponek the brooch he took from Yomie's corpse to Yoponek and telling him she left it for him to pin it to her dress on their wedding day when they met again and Yoponek just believing that day will come and meanwhile Yomie's floating in the damn VOID-

I'm sad about them.

...

Ar'alani: You need to identify yourselves.

Battle Dreadnaught: We've been begged by the people of this world to protect them from threats.

Ar'alani: Oh, so you've talked with the Magys, too?

BD: The what?

Ar'alani: The leader of the people of Sunrise.

BD: Never heard of it.

BD: We were begged though. We will get rid of you if you don't leave.

Ar'alani: Mate-

...

Ar'alani: You need to bring that asteroid's missile with you

Lakinda: Ok.

*later & with no asteroid missile (too slow to get it out intact in time to provide aid to the Vigilant)*

Ar'alani: uUUhhhhh we might not do well with this now...

*more battle. Lakinda lays into the damaged side of the Dreadnaught and pretty much takes it out after Ar'alani draws enemy fire to her ship.*

Ar'alani: Yeah, nice.

...

Lakinda: Oh my stars, what if Thrawn's not even that good? What if it was just Ar'alani all along- no. No, he is good. He just learned from the best. *is a little bit obsessed with Ar'alani and Thrawn's history*

...

Ar'alani: Ok, Csilla said you have to go help Thrawn with the pirates, but I know you have beef with him-

Lakinda: I do NOT have beef with Thrawn.

Ar'alani: You get this annoyed look and tone whenever you interact with him even if he's not being annoying.

Ar'alani: Anyway, as Admiral I can just keep you here if you don't want to go.

Lakinda: No, it's fine.

Ar'alani: Sure.

...

HHhhh ok. Haplif is getting so much Chiss info and Lakuviv and Co. are completely unaware they're being played and I'm scared about how this whole thing with the Nyix mines is going to play out.

...

Lakbulbup: Hey so there's this guy called Senior Captain Thrawn and he's good with analysing art-

Lakphro: Yeah fine. Send the brooch to him.

...

Captain Fsir: aaaaa help, we're being attacked by Vagaari scouts.

Thrawn, off mic to the bridge crew: This is a set up.

...

Thrawn: I have a plan but I need to see inside your ship first.

Fsir: What-

(He got invited over and took them down so fast at the "pirate base" because of it lmao).

...

Lakooni: *comm dies after she sends the emergency family summons* LAKUVIV. Your comm is shiet

Lakuviv: That officer you were talking to was me, I'm sorry it had to go this way *pulls a blaster on her* if you'll follow me to my private rooms-

Lakooni, absolutely furious: I'm going to fuck you up so bad for this, do you even know? Do you know what you've unleashed? I'll end your entire career, you backstabbing son of a bi-

Lakuviv: *raises blaster a bit higher*

Lakooni: FIne.

(I can't be the only one whose mind went straight to the gutter and wondered if AO3 had anything with them jxfkjeasdfkjsd)

...

Every time someone says "yeah, we'll swing by," (which is a lot actually now that I think about it) gave me a bit of a giggle. It made conversation feel more real.

...

Lakinda when the summons came through: Ok but does Thrawn NEED me there? no. He just needs my ship *leaves*

...

Apros when Grayshrike eventually meets up with Springhawk: Lakinda got called away on a family emergency order put out to all CEDF Xodlak that weren't in immediate battles or on critical missions.

Thrawn, pissed: WHAt-

Samakro, also pissed and angry at Apros: DID YOU TRY TO STOP HER?

Apros, not able to be pissed with Thrawn because he's higher rank, but able to be pissed with Samakro because they're the same rank and therefore fair game: YES. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I NOT?

Apros: oh btw, Thrawn, she said this had come for you *gives him Lakphro's brooch*

Thrawn: Ooh, pretty.

...

Thrawn to the Magys: Wakey wakey, do you know what this is? *holds up the brooch*

The Magys: The work of my people. It looks new, though.

Thalias: surprise, they're not dead.

The Magys: There is hope!

*when they've put The Magys back into hibernation*

Thrawn: We also have three families being scammed.

Samakro: *grumpy noises*

...

Lakinda, just woken up: What do you want?

Thrawn over comms: You're being scammed. There are no mines. It's a set up.

Lakinda: Damn.

Thrawn: I have a plan though!

Lakinda once he's explained: From the bottom of my heart, what the fuck-

Samakro: That's insane actually.

Thrawn: Well if you two come up with anything better, let me know <3

...

Samakro convincing everyone that Thrawn's plans are strictly military and that he's got no clue with politics and doesn't know how to play them anyway (which is still wild to me tbh. I don't believe it) and then even convincing himself on it too/that Thrawn's their best commander even if his plans are insane sometimes.

...

I'm still processing the 3 families showdown over Sunrise but Thrawn's plan worked a treat even with family politics fucking up Lakinda's end (my girl got thrown in the brig for talking to Thrawn/warning him that at the end of this the embarrassment at finding out they were being scammed would have worse fallout than the actual fight that they didn't think of when they were making the plan).

...

Lakinda: Oh my gods it was Ar'alani copying Thrawn's tactics the whole time-

...

Thyklo: Patriarch Thooraki is dead.

Thurfian: Ah. Condolences.

Thyklo: You're replacing him.

Thurfian: It is an honour.

Thurfian, internally: holy FUCK- Zistalmu is going to lose his damn mind lmfao.

[iamaboringrattat]

i want mommy to play mind games and lie to me as she plays. i’ll believe them bc mommy knows how to play with her pussy. u know wat it truly needs but i don’t.

i’m laying on my back, with arms place underneath my knees. to be all open for u to touch. ur holding my black bullet vib, turning it on the first setting. starting from the bottom of my slit. i feel u playin with my lips collecting the juices to bring up to my clit hearing how wet ‘she’ is. wanting to tease me u push the toy into my cunt. hold it for a few seconds while i slowly realizing the invasion. i feel u slip it out and place the flat tip on the bottom of my clit. “pull up my pussy and show me that pretty clit of yours for me”

“yes ma’am” i do as i’m told.

“such a good girl for mommy, make sure u hold it”.

movin the vib for the first time u make slow circles around my clit. makin me whiny already. every rotation stopping to press down on the top and bottom of my clit. top bottom. top bottom. top bottom. feels so good i have to squirm i little bit. “you already close sweetheart?” i nod my head and let out a soft and weak “yes ma’am”.

i feel u press of tip of the bullet flat on my whole clit. over my moans u tell me, “make that pussy cum whenever u need sweetheart” kissing my wet pussy lightly. makin me cum for the time, i think.

after i finish soakin the towels for the first time, i think. u begin to flick my clit as u turn the vib up. struggling to buck my hips. “wait. mommy. i just. came.”

u hear me struggle through my sentence as u continue to couch me through my ‘first’ orgasm. “what are u talking about silly? u still have to come for me please. ik it’s a lot but mommy’s gonna help you squirt for me i promise.” flicking up and down quickly and firmly.

up down. up down. up down. makin me squirt for the second time for u, i think. i hear a soft click as u turn up the vib for the last time pushing it hard on my clit. fuck i need u to stop now, i think. my eyes start to get blurry as tears swiftly build up and i cum for the third time, i think.

moaning and squirming as i try to catch my breathe. i slowly start to lose the grip pullin up my clit and my arms holdin up my legs. ur quick with it, “no ma’am, go back to how ur supposed to be” i’m obedient so i do.

u decided to tease me way more by pulling my lips apart and placing the vib on the underside of my clit makin me squirt for the fourth time, i think. it hurts. i’m crying and u don’t care. my pleas get covered up with, “i know u can cum for me. i know it’s a lot but once u cum you’re gonna feel so much better. come on.”

fifth time, i think. sixth time, i think. “mommy. fuck. please. i already came. i already. ahh please.”

“shhhhhh baby what r u talking about, mommy’s pussy hasn’t cum once, she’s only been gushing a little. ik she always does that’s right sluty girl. look and nod at me sweetie”.

i pick up slowly my tear stained face to look at u. “please. it. hurts.”

“what was that baby?” u reply in a serious tone.

“mommy i. i already came. please. fuck. it. hurts-. i’m coming-.”

i feel mommy kiss my pussy and licking me as i cum for the first time. mwah. mwah. mwah. u back away taking everything off. rubbing the inside of my thighs. “see i told u it would make u feel better. u can bring ur legs down. i’m gonna hold u down this time i make u cum”

“what?” i let out a sacred whimper as u grab my knees to open them back up to my chest.

“no no no nooo please no. i already came so-“

“no u didn’t” pinching my clit then plugging my hole with two of ur fingers.

“what dumb whore u don’t know anything do u?”

u pull up ur left hand to spank my desperate clit. “mommy told you that u only came once for. so i have no idea of what ur talking about cuz mommy’s pussy only came once.”

ur palm coming down on my clit twice then to pinch it again. with no warning u push a third finger into my cunt. as u pin both of my knees with one arm and gain access to suck on my clit. hard. my useless attempt to grab and push u away makes u laugh in my pussy causing vibrations makin me try again. i’m close again.

“ur not allowed to cum slut. awe did u wanna cum bby? but u we’re just beggin for me to stop. god ur so dumb. just shut up for and hold it.”

ur mouth on my clit makes me squirmy. ur lips sucking so hard then playing with mommy’s clit with the tip of ur tongue. still raming ur fingers deep inside my cunt.

“omg. omg. oh my fuckin god. i’m sorry. i’m so sorry i don’t know what i’m talking about”

i ramble franticly and cover my mouth with my hands. letting out a pathetic scream, my eyes glossing over again.

“calm down sweetie, god damn ur so dumb and needy. u can cum for me.”

i’ve been waiting on this but i’m scared what if ur lying. but ik mommy wouldn’t lie to be. “come on, hurry up bby”

u feel me clenching and finally coming for the second time. mwah. mwah. mwah. u slap my pussy one more time to see scared my face gets. squirmin to my side with my legs closed. pussy wet and throbbing as i twitch and moan into my hands. placing ur hands on my upper thighs near my clit and my waist. poking my swollen clit.

“why are u so sensitive sweetheart?” u kiss my face as u roll my clit under ur fingers to calm me down.

[urdrowning]

Okay so Ona piano idea:

Edit: OH MY GOD I apologise, I honestly started this thinking I would just quickly put down some ideas and then I ended up writing this whole thing... Well I hope you like it. (also I recommend listening to the pieces whilst reading it, really adds to the story. I put the youtube links in there)

Whenever you're playing piano Ona gets completely distracted and just stops doing whatever she was doing before to stare at your hands, completely mesmerised by the movements of your fingers tickling the ivories. 

The first time this happens is when you've just become roommates. You'd finally gotten a piano in your shared apartment and you decide to try it out, whilst Ona is doing the dishes. You start playing Maybe by Yiruma (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6Wg_JpVHkio), because you've played it so many times that it was etched into your muscle memory. At first you're too lost in the music to notice your roommate staring at you, but after about 4 phrases, you are suddenly startled by the sound of cutlery crashing to the floor. When you look up you find Ona looking at you with wide eyes, bright red cheeks and a flustered expression. "Sorry, it just slipped away from me. Please continue." She says as she picks everything up and proceeds to continue washing the dishes. You giggle as you start playing again from the top. Only this time, you notice the sound of the dishes being washed disappearing as soon as you start playing. You turn your head ever so slightly towards the kitchen and you notice Ona has indeed stopped what she was doing, but as soon as your eyes meet hers (which had been focussed on your fingers before you turned around), she suddenly averts her gaze back to the sink and pretends to focus on a particularly stubborn stain on one of the plates in there.

The second time it happens is when later that week, some of your United teammates come over to your place and someone asks you to play something. You decide to try and impress them with your piano cover of Fly me to the moon (that goes a little something like this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5X0ln7lP-w). Some of the girls gather around the piano to watch, but Ona is still sitting on the couch with some otters, chatting about something. When she hears the sound of the piano however, she completely forgets what she was talking about. She stops speaking mid sentence and without even realising it moves her head to look past the other girls and get a better view of the girl behind the piano: you. "Ona what where you-" "shhhhhh" she rudely shushes Millie. When you approach the second chorus, Ella opens her mouth to start singing along: "FLYYY ME TO TH- ouch!" She stops as she feels an elbow collide harshly with her shoulder and she finds Ona sending her a stern glare.

The third time is when you have just arrived back home after an intense match. You sit down on the piano stool whilst the two of you are still discussing everything that happened on the field today, and you start absentmindedly tickling the ivories. "But be honest, were you on time with that slide tackle or should it have been a foul?" You ask whilst your fingers roam the clavier, fiddling around on auto pilot in the key of G-minor. You turn your around when you don't get an answer but your hands don't leave the piano. Ona doesn't look you in the eyes, instead her gaze is glued onto your hands, following their every movement. "Ona?" You ask as you now fully turn around, forcing you to stop playing. Ona blinks as she lightly shakes head left and right. "Sorry, what were you saying?"

By the forth time you have noticed the pattern and you decide to inquire her about it. "Ona, you know you don't have to be polite and drop everything you're doing whenever I am playing piano to listen right?" You ask, her eyes widening at your observation. "Yeah I know, I just- It's... distracting." she says hesitantly. "Oh, I'm sorry. I'll just play when you're out then." you say, immediately feeling guilty because she probably finds your practicing annoying. "No, no, please, no, that's not what I meant. I like it, I really do. So much I can't stop watching you play. You really look b- sound beautiful.. I mean it- It sounds beautiful when you play." she stammers shyly. "Oh. Thanks."

The fifth time Ona decides to get ahead of the distraction as soon as she sees you sitting down behind the piano. "Can you show me?" she asks with a shy smile on her face. "Sure, come here." you say as you scoot over a bit and pat the now empty spot next to you. The chair is far too small for the both of you and you almost fall off your side, only being stopped by Ona's arm quickly wrapping around you. You feel your cheeks flushing so you quickly start playing a piece you've just learned called The Dream of You by Tim Neumark (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A-Cm7QHjB8U). You immediately regret playing the relatively new piece, because Ona's arm still being wrapped around you sends butterflies to your stomach and this time, you're the distracted one. It only gets worse when halfway during the piece, she softly lays her head on your shoulder. You sloppily make your way trough the piece, hoping Ona didn't notice all of the mistakes you made. You can feel her body moving up and down as her breathing relaxes, and when you glance to the side, you notice she has closed her eyes this time. When you play your last notes, you keep your foot on the pedal, letting the sound die out naturally, and you suddenly feel your heart rate starting to rise. Surely Ona must notice this as her head is still on your shoulder and your heart is basically pounding out of your chest at this point. She slowly starts lifting your head but she doesn't move backwards, leaving only about five centimeters between your faces. "Y/N?" she almost whispers, "Can I-" "Yes." You interrupt her. A smile forms on her lips before she closes the small gap between you.

piano anon this is my official request for you to start writing, i am in-love with your mind. this is absolutely incredible i would give ANYTHING for this to be a full fic 🫶

THIS IS ABSOLUTELY ADORABLE !!! THE IDEA OF ONA JUST INSTANTLY MELTING INTO A RELAXED STATE WHEN YOU PLAY THE SLIGHTEST PART OF A SONG.. i’m gonna actually melt.

the last part where she rests her head on your shoulder while cuddling into your side.. i’m actually gonna melt 🫠 like it actually made me giggly and all. i’d like to imagine on some nights when ona feels homesick or has had a bad day training she asks you to play for her to make her feel better, and while you play she ends up falling asleep cuddled into your side :,)

[real-life-senshi]

10 (Mostly) Spoiler-Free Reasons to Watch Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon 2003 Live Action

A countdown to the 20th anniversary of Act 1 air date!

Reason 6: A more developed ✨Miracle Romance✨!

How can one ever talk about Sailor Moon without discussing the most iconic and legendary couple in history that rivals Romeo and Juliet - Usagi & Mamoru?

Had the live-action done this couple's story dirty, they might as well chuck the whole project out the window! Thankfully, they didn't screw it up, and in fact, I personally think their love story got a further glow-up!

A more well-rounded developed relationship

The live-action gave more space and time to develop Mamoru and Usagi's relationship, making it more believable, and realistic, and proving to the audience their feelings for each other are genuinely mutual! It started off with an almost antagonistic, pigtail-pulling relationship, developing into what seems to be a "one-sided" crush because they are both so oblivious, to mutual love and respect.

Like seriously - this is how Usamamo meets in Act 1 (shhhhhh, it's Act 1, barely a spoiler):

While technically this is also another spoiler, I'm going to say it anyway to highlight the difference here: Basically, Usagi falls in love with Mamoru AND comes to terms that she's in love with Mamoru and "not Tuxedo Mask" before finding out Mamoru's true identity and their shared past life. I think this is such an important, and much better narrative because it leaves no room for debate that Usagi is in love with Mamoru for the right reasons, instead of being in love with the idea of him because he's Tuxedo Mask and it's romantic. In fact, how romantic it is to consider Usagi fell in love with the same person twice without realizing it???? I think that’s romantic!

To me, there's a difference between "they are bound to fall in love with each other because it is their destiny" versus "they fell in love with each other just as it was foretold by destiny". The live-action strictly falls into the latter category. It's all a matter of choice and agency from the characters!

More dramarama!

The live-action seriously amped up the drama between the two of them, on both fronts regarding their personal lives and also their heroic lives! The additional dramatic elements (that I will NOT spoil) created a heightened "will they, won't they" tension that will make UsaMamo fans anxious to watch. There's quite a bit of mutual pining for Usamamo fans to look forward to in the live-action!

Angst is also a must in the live-action universe, and it's a treat to watch these two coming together trying to defy the odds. Even the filming angle and post-production editing go all out to amp that up!

Minimal "damsel in distress" routine, reverse or otherwise!

I know... it's a running gag in the manga and anime universe that Mamoru always gets kidnapped or brainwashed. Thankfully, the live-action took a different trajectory with their storytelling.

That's not to say there's zero kidnapping/held hostage-type situation, etc. But even in such scenarios, the Prince of Earth always is still in control and does everything he can to ultimately come to a resolution in his own way.

Personally, I don't care much for Mamoru in manga and anime verse, thinking he's just there to make Usagi look good, but I actually like Mamoru's character in the live-action. No matter as Tuxedo Kamen or Prince Endymion, he has quite a bit of involvement in battle scenes. And he is ACTUALLY competent and pairs up really well with Usagi as a couple and with Sailor Moon as a fighter. Some of their duo fight scenes are really cool!

Oh. And there's none of the "kissing you while you are asleep/unconscious" stuff. I'm not going to argue it wasn't romantic in the manga, etc. But times have changed since the original material was written/drawn, and I don't think that's something that will fly well with people in this current age and time. The live-action caught on with the time and used other techniques to make the romance pop instead, and for that I am thankful!

Opposite attracts

Mamoru is written a bit differently than manga and anime. Mamoru's more aloof, prickly, and definitely tsundere. He becomes awkward when he warms up, which is really adorable to see. Also, he wears leather jacket and rides a motorcycle, which amps up his "cool" factor by... A LOT!!!

Usagi is mostly the same as manga and anime, but less crybaby. Like I mentioned before in part 2 of this, Usagi is not exaggeratedly "stupid", just slower, and appropriately immature and innocent for someone her age who hasn't experienced much adversaries until the Senshi business. (No, butt-heading with your little brother doesn't count. lol)

So all's to say in the live-action, they really build up this whole opposite-attracts kind of deal with Usamamo, and where Usagi had to work to see through Mamoru's prickly exterior and soften him up.

Also, I think they cast Mamoru and Usagi really well. Just look at their height difference! Another thing that makes them look so good together????

You can watch the subbed versions of the series at:

Miss Dream Fansubs

Sea of Serenity Fansubs

The series is also on other online streaming sites, but be cautious to only visit them with good adware and firewall installed.

5 days till the 20th anniversary of Act 1 air date!

Part 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10

[spidey-official]

There was a bang on the roof of my house just now,,, was that u,,,, i have bandaids????

uhhhh i have noooo idea what you're talking about shhhh shush shush I just escaped mr stark I think you might be hearing things shhhhhh it was probably the wind

[nuu-art-blog]

spoiler warning for Last note of the Golden Witch

1: Me, happy that I get to experience Last note of the Golden Witch for the first time through the nezumiva streams, since I hadn't gotten around to seeking it out for myself yet

2: My darling beloved dearest who I liveblogged Umineko to when I first read it so they sort of know everything that happens but didn't read it themselves, however, likes reading wiki pages: "No way, Asumu had a witchsona"

1: "Huh, must be a manga thing, cause I don't remember that."

2: sends me a Dot Jpeg

1: Me, who had seen the character before but had escaped knowledge of the character's name before now: "THAT'S ASUMU????"

2: "Nooooo she's not Asumu shhhhhh, I must've read that wrong,"

1: "Once something is learned it cannot be unlearned..."

[more stuff under the cut]

Okay, first here I want to introduce a new Witch OC of mine; Zero, the Witch of Chaos

[Witch Description: When most witches discuss fragments, though there are infinitely many, they are mainly focused on fragments that follow the same rules as each other. Zero, the Witch of Chaos, exists outside of those rules and structures. They can see fragments of infinitely many different rules, and of each ruleset, infinitely many scenarios. Zero fights by creating noise and confusion around the truth by using the tool they call the Magenta Truth- statements that have the level of red truth in at least one fragment. Though the Magenta Truth is easily possible to disprove if it does not apply to the fragment taking place, it is more akin to creating a haystack to cover a needle. Some witches dislike Zero, viewing their inclusion of fragments with contradictory rules as disrespectful to the rules of an individual fragment; however, from Zero's perspective, every fragment is true to itself, and thus all hold equal value to each other.]

And now after rambling about all that, I'd also like to talk about the design process too. Their name is obviously the number, 0, and I chose it because 0 is both a real number and an imaginary number.

Their design also incorporates a lot of magenta because the color magenta technically doesn't exist either- there is no wavelength of light for magenta.

Then, with the magenta, I also employed a bit of the magenta-cyan-yellow color wheel, where the left half of the shirt on their design is a darker cyan and the right half of their shirt is a lighter yellow. Even if it might be on theme, I didn't want to use pure cyan and pure yellow because it would have felt too noisy to me.

Of course, speaking about noise in the design, there's a lot of asymmetry. Mismatched hair and mismatched attire and mismatched earrings

To be honest, the idea for the theme originated in joke continuation of the theme from the last time I did art for the stream, that being the Sonic crossover stuff, so the thought process was like Chaos emeralds, Chaos control -> witch of Chaos, but despite that I'm actually really happy with how this oc turned out? I feel like they can stand on their own, even outside of the joke.

However, I am hopelessly and endlessly committed to the bit, so-

Last time I did art and related memes, one of the included things was this,

and now that some time has passed I can say that I have done this Further Research and I'd like to report my findings;

Kanon is not Shadow, but Somebody Else Is. Consider the following traits.

Of course, one of the very defining things for Shadow's character is that he lost Maria and Gerald, who are family to his eyes, and this tragedy changed him

When he's brought back, all he can think about is getting revenge for the family he lost

His mission is the only thing that matters to him at this point

Eventually comes to realize this isn't what Maria wanted for him at all and spends the last act of the game helping to avert the disaster he set up

And with all this laid out, obviously the real Shadow The Hedgehog parallel is Ange Ushiromiya, and though this also started as a joke I've thought about this way too much now. If Ange and Shadow aren't the same characters then um what's this?

Checkmate. So I also drew Ange in the pose from the beginning of SA2 where Sonic sees Shadow for the first time.

"It all starts with this... a Book containing the Single Truth!"

[forabeatofadrum]

The Class Menagerie

Summary: Kurt is a pre-school teacher at a school that has a huge variety of animals to care for. Unfortunately, one day, Kurt finds out that ten of them have escaped their cages. Luckily, a new trainee teacher named Blaine, offers to help him out.

Notes: Hello, hello, welcome to The Class Menagerie, my fic for the Klaine Back-To-School challenge, hosted by @the-lima-bean. There are animals!

The title was given to me by an anon on Tumblr, so anon, if you're reading this, thank you!!!!

Also, also, don't try to wrap your head around why this random pre-school in New York has this variety of animals. It is my fic and I get to decide the reality of the situation!

I hope you enjoy.

AO3 | S&C

--

Kurt is about to lose his mind. He has no idea where it has gone wrong, but it has gone wrong.

"Fuck," he yells, because he's fucked. He is so totally fucked. It's his third year as a pre-school teacher and this has never happened before.

He needs to reel in the swearing before the kids arrive. He also needs to fix this mess before the kids arrive.

They will be devastated if they find out that ten of the classroom pets have gone missing.

"Fuck!" Kurt says again. How did this happen? These animals are all specially cared for. They live here in special cages. This classroom is reserved for them. Kids come here to see the animals, not the other way around.

Suddenly, Kurt hears a voice.

"Everything all right in here?" he hears, "I heard swearing."

Blaine Anderson is leaning in the doorframe and he has no right looking that good while doing so. Kurt knows of him. Blaine joined this pre-school’s staff as a trainee teacher a week ago. He mostly helps out in Mercedes’s class, so Kurt hasn’t gotten a chance to properly talk to him yet. Sure, they’ve exchanged some words, but Kurt would love to get to know him more properly.

Unfortunately for him, Blaine just happened to walk into an awkward situation.

Then he realises that the animals might be in the room.

“Close the door!” he frantically yells towards Blaine.

Blaine is shocked, but he manages to do so.

“What’s going on?” he asks, looking alarmed.

“We lost ten animals,” Kurt gestures around. Blaine takes in his surroundings and he sees the empty cages. His eyes widen when the realisation hits him.

“How did this happen?” Blaine asks frantically.

“I don’t know!” Kurt answers, sounding equally frantic, “I came in around eight, since my class will visit the fur babies first, and this is what I found. I don’t know how long they’ve been out. Or how they got out in the first place.”

Blaine checks his watch and Kurt sees the realisation sink in. They need to find these animals fast, otherwise they will have to deal with a lot of upset and potentially crying pre-schoolers.

“Check every corner, now!” Blaine yells.

It doesn’t have to be said twice.

Both Kurt and Blaine sprint towards the corners, but to no avail. Kurt’s about to tear his hair out, which is saying something cause usually nothing would allow Kurt to mess up his hair.

Then he hears it.

“Shhhh!” he shushes Blaine.

“What?”

“Shhhhhh!”

It is dead silent and that’s when Kurt can hear it more clearly. It’s a squeaking noise. It’s the sound of a little hamster. Kurt and Blaine follow the sound.

“Let me check,” Blaine says and the next thing Kurt knows, Blaine’s on the floor. He’s trying to see if he can spot the hamster underneath the furniture.

Kurt looks at Blaine and he reminds himself that he’s at work.

“I think there is an animal there!”

“Toffee?”

“Toffee?” Blaine asks.

“The hamster is named Toffee,” Kurt says.

Blaine slowly gets up and Kurt holds out his hand to help him. Blaine takes it and once Blaine’s up, he doesn’t let go. He doesn’t seem to notice. Should Kurt comment on it?

“Who are we missing, apart from Toffee?” Blaine asks and Kurt reminds himself to stay focused.

“Uh…”

“Kurt?”

“Right!” Kurt snaps out of it and he gets out of Blaine’s grip. Kurt sees that Blaine quickly looks down to his hand, but he also doesn’t comment on it and Kurt turns away to check the cages.

Kurt quickly makes a list of all the missing animals and his frustration only grows. He knows that ten are missing, but now that he knows who are missing, it becomes more real. They’ve already found Toffee, but they need to find two baby rabbits, a baby ferret, a baby meerkat, one guinea pig, a chinchilla, a rat, a hedgehog and a mouse. Usually, Kurt is proud of this school’s boastful collection, but now he wishes that they weren’t known for this.

“Kurt, help!” he hears and when Kurt turns around, he sees that Blaine is stuck.

“What happened?”

“I tried to reach Toffee, to no avail! I tried to reach through this gap between the cabinet and the wall,” Blaine says, “Could you help me move this cabinet?”

“Oh Blaine,” Kurt laughs, “This cabinet has wheels!”

“… Oh.”

Kurt takes the brake of the wheels and Blaine uses his free hand to push the cabinet aside and Kurt has to stop himself from laughing. Blaine looks so bewildered.

“Well, Toffee is accounted for,” Kurt says as he reaches down to pick up Toffee, “Although I am afraid it’s not going to be as easy to find the others.”

Blaine checks his watch.

“What are we going to do?”

“Let me send a message to Rachel,” Kurt says, “She can welcome my class.”

Rachel isn’t a full-time teacher. She sometimes gives music classes to the kids, but Kurt happens to know that she doesn’t have a class this morning and she’s at school. She likes to get here early to prepare.

Kurt quickly sends her a message, explaining the situation.

Meanwhile, Blaine is listening attentively for more sounds. He’s following something.

“Kurt, I think I found something,” he whispers.

Kurt presses send and he hopes Rachel sees it in time, otherwise they’ll be in big trouble.

Blaine’s crouched down in front of a bookcase. The bookcase is filled with informative children’s books about all the animals in the classroom, including the one who is currently sleeping behind the bookcase.

It’s Waffle, the chinchilla.

“Waffle!” Kurt whispers excitedly.

“Did you all name them after food?”

“I didn’t name them,” Kurt answers, “Some kids named them and they aren’t all named after food. Most are, though.”

“What name would you give to your pet?”

Kurt stops and think. He doesn’t really know. He’s never thought about it, since his landlord doesn’t allow pets and even if they did, Kurt wouldn’t have the space.

“I don’t know. You?” he casts the question back.

“Mimi,” Blaine answers.

“Mimi,” Kurt repeats, “I like the sound of that.”

“Thanks, I’ll tell her.”

“You have a pet?”

Blaine nods happily.

“Yes, wanna see a photo of her?”

Kurt would love to, but just at that moment, Waffle chooses to wake up. Kurt and Blaine’s heads jerk back towards the bookcase. They can hear Waffle making noises. It seems like the chinchilla hasn’t moved yet, so now is their chance.

The bookcase doesn’t have wheels, though, so Kurt carefully stars taking books off the lowest shelf. He hopes that Waffle won’t be scared. Blaine is in position to grab Waffle.

It works and Blaine carefully puts Waffle back in the cage. Two down, eight to go.

“This is a nightmare,” Kurt groans out.

“At least we’re together,” Blaine laughs.

“Huh?”

“I mean, the two of us. Here. Two is better than one. We’re faster!” Blaine says quickly.

“Exactly,” Kurt says.

“So, uh, do you want to see a photo of Mimi?”

“Absolutely.”

Blaine whips out his phone and his background is a photo of Mimi wearing a rainbow bandana, so he doesn’t have to sift through photos. Mimi is a cute light brown cavalier king Charles spaniel. Kurt focuses on the bandana.

“Oh, yeah, she wore this for Pride.”

Kurt already heard through others that Blaine is gay, but this confirms it for him.

“Very stylish,” Kurt says back.

“How about this? Let’s have some fun!”

Kurt raises an eyebrow.

“For every animal we find, I show you a Mimi photo.”

Kurt lets out a laugh. Blaine is adorable.

“Deal.”

The two of them continue to search the classroom and Kurt thinks he can hear some stomping coming from one corner. He moves the furniture so that he can get a better view.

“Oh!”

“What?” Blaine asks from the other side.

“You should see this for yourself.”

Blaine moves to stand next to Kurt and his eyes also widen. Then he looks amused.

“This is why they call it breeding like rabbits,” he says.

“Do we… interrupt them?” Kurt asks.

“Maybe we’ll come back to these later. At least we know where they are now.”

Kurt moves the furniture back, now in a way to prevent them from easily running away from that spot, and Kurt and Blaine continue their search.

They find Noodle the hedgehog in the open cupboard with all the food. Kurt carefully wraps him in a towel so that Kurt won’t get hurt. Blaine cleans up the bag of food that Noodle demolished.

Afterwards, Blaine shows Kurt a photo of Mimi wearing a raincoat.

Blaine then has the idea to use the leftover food to potentially lure an animal out of hiding. He places it on the ground and he and Kurt move behind the cages. Lo and behold, Crumpet the guinea pig crawls out of a box with toys.

Even though Blaine is the one who came up the plan, Kurt still feels like he’s being rewarded when Blaine shows him a photo of Mimi sleeping with her head tucked between her paws.

“It’s so dark in here,” Kurt says, “Maybe some additional light will help the search.”

Kurt then draws the curtains open and Nathaniel the rat jumps on him from the windowsill. Kurt shrieks in shock and Nathaniel jumps off him and runs away.

“Bad girl!”

Blaine runs after her and dives to the floor in order to prevent her from hiding in another tight spot.

“I got her!” Blaine yells, “I got- Ouch! She bit me!”

Luckily, instead of hiding in that tight spot, Nathaniel zooms across the classroom. Kurt tries to catch her. He feels a bit bad for her, because she is clearly stressed, so Kurt makes a mental note to tell the kids to give her an extra treat later.

“Nathaniel, please just work with us!”

“She’s named Nathaniel?”

“Yes! Again, kids named these animals!”

Eventually, both Kurt and Blaine push her towards a corner. Luckily, she doesn’t jump on Kurt again, or Blaine, so they manage to carefully pick her up. Blaine places her back into her cage and Kurt’s left behind to clean up the poops, because Nathaniel pooped in fear.

By the time everything is clean, the bunnies have also finished their business, so Kurt and Blaine put them back in their cages as well. Luckily, they were too tired to run away. Besides, Kurt suspects that they don’t mind being in the cage as long as they’re together.

“That calls for 3 Mimi photos!” Blaine says.

“We fucking need it,” Kurt says back.

“Language, Mr. Hummel!” Blaine laughs.

“The kids aren’t here yet. Let me have this.”

“You can have this instead,” Blaine holds out his phone to show him a photo of Mimi running in the grass. Then he swipes to one of Mimi chewing a toy, and then to one of Mimi with a squirrel.

“That’s Watson,” Blaine explains, “He lives in Central Park and he’s Mimi’s best friend.”

Kurt coos. Of course Mimi has made a friend in the park.

“Alright, three left,” Kurt says and he quickly checks his phone. Rachel has sent him a thumbs up emoji and Kurt lets out a sigh of relief. He’ll deal with the repercussions of all of this later, but first he and Blaine have three more animals left to catch.

“Where the hell could they be?” Blaine ponders out loud.

He has a point. Kurt feels like he’s scoured every nook and cranny of this classroom, but he is still missing something. The windows have been closed this entire time, and apart from the moment Blaine came in, the same goes for the door. They must be somewhere.

There are some more cabinets with closed doors. They never checked that, because how the hell would these animals get in there?

Still, it doesn’t hurt to look.

Kurt and Blaine go through all the cabinets and indeed, they find Cookie the ferret sleeping between some blankets.

“How did this even happen?” Kurt asks.

“I have no clue,” Blaine says, as he carefully lifts Cookie out of the cabinet.

“These blankets do seem more comfortable than the cages,” Kurt says.

Blaine puts Cookie safely away and then shows a video of Mimi. She’s singing along with Blaine, who is playing some simple piano melodies and Kurt’s heart swells at the sight of Blaine. And Mimi. Mimi, too, of course.

Luckily, watching the video has an added benefit. Bear the mouse reacts to the sound by peeping. Kurt and Blaine follow the sound and find Bear in another closed cabinet. It’s an old one, so Kurt can see that Bear ate part of the door to make an entrance.

“Bear the mouse?” Blaine asks.

“Again, kids!” Kurt says as he puts Bear in the cage, “Someone thought it was funny to name a small animal after a big one.”

“I wouldn’t call Mimi Hedgehog or something.”

“You’re no fun,” Kurt teases.

Mimi is indeed a small dog. The photo of her standing next to a big tree illustrates that.

“One more!” Blaine says cheerfully.

Kurt smiles. His eyes fall on the clock. School has started, but it’s alright. Rachel will keep his kids entertained and all things considered, they’re doing this fairly quickly.

Right?

Twenty minutes later, Kurt realises he was mistaken.

They cannot find Sebastian the meerkat.

Meanwhile, Rachel is trying to message him, asking for how long it’s going to take. She obviously has to be discreet, since she cannot be on her phone while teaching the kids, but it makes it all a bit more complicated, since they can’t just call.

Blaine’s bowtie is untied and he looks stressed. Kurt’s certain he also looks messy. They’ve uprooted so many pieces of furniture in these past twenty minutes and that is exhausting.

“Can I go on the record and say that I fucking hate Sebastian,” Blaine says.

“Who’s swearing now?” Kurt says with mock horror.

“You were right. It is necessary.”

“Where could he be, though?” Kurt sighs.

“Maybe we need to change our approach,” Blaine says.

Kurt raises an eyebrow.

“What do you suggest?”

“Maybe we need to startle him, so that he comes out of hiding. We can make a loud noise.”

“Hm. That’s an idea.”

“There’s one downside, though.”

“Hm?”

“We will disturb the other animals, and I don’t know if I can handle that. Emotionally.”

Kurt looks around and he also doesn’t like the idea. Cookie is still sleeping peacefully and Nathaniel has finally calmed down.

“I don’t think I can handle it either, but what choice do we have?”

“Yeah…” Blaine nods solemnly.

“What noise do we make, though?” Kurt asks, “We also can’t make too much of a mess, because it might scare the kids.

“I have a whistle.”

“Why do you… carry a whistle?” Kurt asks.

“It’s to remember my marching band days,” Blaine says and he reaches for something in his pockets. It’s his key ring and there is indeed a small silver whistle attached to it.

“I didn’t know you marched!” Kurt exclaims.

“I mean, we haven’t really gotten the time to get to know each other yet,” Blaine points out.

It’s true. There’s a lot that’s left to discover and Kurt likes the idea of that. He wonders how Blaine will react when he finds out that Kurt was on the football team for a short while and that he was a cheerleader for a little bit longer.

“Maybe after all of this, we can hang out more,” Kurt suggests.

“You can come and meet my dog!” Blaine immediately says.

“I’d love to!” Kurt beams.

“How about this? If we find this meerkat, you can meet Mimi in the flesh!”

“How will that work? Is she here at the school?”

Blaine turns a bit red.

“Erm. Uh. I meant you could come over to my place after work.”

“Oh.”

“I- You don’t have to, if you have plans! Or whatever reason! You don’t have to justify a no if it’s a no-”

“Blaine, it isn’t a no!” Kurt quickly says.

“Ah,” Blaine looks relieved, “Good.”

“We better find this meerkat, then, if me meeting Mimi is the pay-off.”

Blaine nods and he blows his whistle. As expected, a lot of the animals react and Kurt feels like a terrible person, but it has the desired effect. Sebastian the meerkat shows up from God knows where and starts running around the classroom, jumping on furniture, throwing off things, and creating chaos in general. It doesn’t help that Kurt and Blaine are frantically chasing him.

“Fuck!” Blaine yells as he trips over something and goes down.

Since Kurt was running right behind him, he, in turn, trips over Blaine and lands right on him.

“Ouch!” Kurt says.

“At least you landed on me,” Blaine groans.

“Are you hurt?” Kurt asks.

“Nothing is wrong. I managed to catch myself. I just lost some of my dignity.”

Kurt rolls off Blaine. Blaine also rolls on his back, and to Kurt’s surprise, Blaine starts laughing.

“What’s so funny?” Kurt asks, aghast.

“Just… You know…” Blaine laughs some more.

“What?”

“This is the weirdest things that has happened here at work,” Blaine says through his laughter, “And we work at a pre-school, Kurt. Kids do crazy shit.”

“Like naming a mouse Bear,” Kurt says and he also starts to feel a bit giddy. This is ridiculous.

“Exactly!”

The two of them lie on the ground, just laughing. They can’t wait to tell the others in the staff room. Kurt turns his head to Blaine and he’s surprised to see Blaine staring back. Kurt wants to say something else, but he doesn’t know what. The laughter has been replaced by a comfortable silence.

Kurt wants to reach out. He’s no longer on top of Blaine, since that’s the appropriate response, but he realises he misses it. That’s weird.

But before Kurt can even make up his mind about it, he feels something on his legs.

He looks at his leg and he sees Sebastian the meerkat crawling around.

“Uh.”

“Stay still,” Blaine says and he slowly gets up.

Sebastian the meerkat walks up towards Kurt’s face. By now, Blaine’s crouching next to Kurt, waiting to grab this damned animal.

Unfortunately, the meerkat must have crazy reflexes, because the moment Blaine tries to reach, he jumps off Kurt and runs away. Blaine loses his balance and falls face down on Kurt.

“Fuck this meerkat!” Blaine yells against Kurt’s chest.

“This meerkat seems to have a secret agenda to have us fall on each other,” Kurt jokes, “Now you’ve landed on me.”

“There are worse things to land on, I guess,” Blaine says and he lies there.

“Uh. Blaine?”

“Yeah?”

“We should get up and find Sebastian.”

“Right!” Blaine says as he gets up. He holds out his hand to also help Kurt up.

Sebastian is once again nowhere to be seen, so Kurt and Blaine look around, but he’s gone. Or so it seems. Where the hell can a meerkat be?

Blaine takes out his whistle.

“I can do this again…” he trails off. He doesn’t want to and Kurt understands. It was a last resort and it scares the other animals.

Maybe they need to give up. Kurt can explain to the principal what happened and all ‘animal care’ lessons have to be put on hold.

Kurt sighs and he checks the other animals to see if they’re alright. He pets everyone, apart from Noodle, because the spikes would hurt him. He gives Nathaniel an extra treat. He chuckles when he sees that the rabbits are cosied up together. He says hi to Sebastian. He is happy to see that Cookie is still asleep. He-

Wait a second.

He backtracks.

He stops in front of Sebastian the meerkat’s cage.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Kurt hears Blaine from behind. Kurt can understand the sentiment. Sebastian is in his cage. They couldn’t find him the second time around, since Sebastian straight up moved back on his own.

Kurt quickly closes the cage door.

“Well… At least all animals are accounted for.”

“Oh my God,” Blaine says.

“Does this still count for the Mimi photo requirement?” Kurt asks to lift the mood. It has its desired effect because Blaine loves the photos and the photo of him and Mimi on the beach does not disappoint.

And just like that, it’s over. Kurt quickly fixes his hair and Blaine also ties his bowtie. They have places to go. Kurt has a group of pre-schoolers to look after and Blaine also has to prepare some stuff for work. They’ve already lost valuable time, so they need to get going, but a part of Kurt doesn’t want to. As wacky as this was, it was also kind of fun.

Blaine coughs.

“Anyway. See you later? We can meet up in the staff room, or I can send you the address.”

“What?”

“For the Mimi meeting.”

“Oh, of course!”

Blaine opens the door. He waves and then walks out of the classroom. There’s nothing left for Kurt to do, so he leaves as well.

When he arrives at his own classroom, the relief on Rachel’s face is evident. They play it off in front of the kids and they don’t ask a lot of questions. It’s time to get to work.

--

Blaine’s apartment is very small, but Kurt likes it. The best part is that Mimi immediately runs towards them.

“Did you miss me?” Blaine coos as Mimi jumps against him and Kurt’s heart swells, “I missed you too!”

Kurt crouches down and Mimi tilts her head.

“This is Kurt, he’s a friend, and we had quite an adventure today,” Blaine tells her.

Kurt holds out his hand for Mimi to sniff it. He passes the test, because Mimi licks it.

“She likes you,” Blaine says.

“I like her too!” Kurt says and he’s beaming. Mimi is very playful and Kurt pets her. She revels in it. At one point, he scratches her head and her head tilts back and she squints her eyes. Kurt’s about to burst.

He looks up and he sees Blaine looking down with adoration written across his face. Kurt gets it. He’s only known Mimi for a few seconds and he’s already willing to go to war for her. Kurt’s certain he has the same smitten look on his face.

“You can carry her, if she wants you to,” Blaine says.

“How do I know?”

Blaine kneels down next to Kurt and Mimi.

“Just kneel in front of her and stretch your arms. If she’s willing, she’ll jump into your arms, so you must catch her.”

Kurt tries it and Mimi is eager to be loved, so she leaps into his arms.

“Look!” Kurt turns to Blaine, with Mimi pressed against his chest.

“I’ve never seen her warm up to someone this quickly,” Blaine sounds a bit amazed.

Blaine helps Kurt get up and Kurt carries Mimi to the living room. Blaine gives him a small tour of his place and he asks if Kurt wants coffee. Kurt can’t say no to that!

Kurt cuddles Mimi and Blaine talks from his kitchen. He tells Kurt how he adopted Mimi. A friend of his had a dog who unexpectedly got pregnant, so Blaine and his friends adopted all of the babies. They still have reunions with Mimi’s mom and siblings.

“I have pictures!”

“Please show them!”

Blaine returns with coffee and the two of them spend the remainder of their time together looking at pictures of adorable dogs. It starts with Mimi and Mimi’s family, but then Kurt learns that Blaine also volunteers at a shelter when he has the time and he has many pictures of animals there.

“That’s partially why I hoped to do my traineeship at our pre-school,” Blaine explains, “I like that this particular pre-school has the animals. I want to become a teacher because I love working with kids, so it’s a win-win.”

“Well, it’s important to learn kids from a young age how to care for other life.”

“Exactly!”

“My three-year-old niece once wanted to pet a friend’s rabbit, but she just started slamming that poor animal’s back. Luckily, my sister-in-law stopped her.”

“That sounds unfortunate.”

“How did you get into teaching?” Blaine asks.

Kurt lets out a sigh. It isn’t a big marvellous story. Teaching wasn’t his dream growing up, but that is fine. Sometimes you work hard on something, only to realise that it isn’t what you want after all. That’s what happened to Kurt. He was enrolled in a drama school, but he wasn’t feeling it. This only stressed him out, because he’d worked hard to be accepted into the school. He thought that acting on stage was his dream, so it really messed him up when he realised that it wasn’t true.

Still, he saw no way out. He was committed to finishing his degree. Then in his second year he had to do an internship and he did it at a school. He helped out in a drama department and it was as if the clouds in his head parted. He realised that he was still young and that he had his life ahead of him, so he made the big decision to quit drama school to learn to become a teacher.

During that time, he realised he preferred the pre-school age.

“And here I am,” Kurt wraps up his story.

“Here you are!” Blaine laughs and it’s a nice laugh.

“I’m glad I ended up at this school, even though our principal makes, uh, questionable decisions sometimes,” Kurt says, “But don’t tell principal Sylvester I said that!”

“My lips are sealed,” Blaine pretends to zip his mouth shut, but then he immediately says: “I am also glad I ended up there, even if I am just a trainee. It’s a great place, with amazing extracurriculars and other extra ‘classes’.”

Kurt hums in agreement.

“And, uh, I met you.”

Kurt looks up in surprise. Blaine is staring back, looking a bit nervous. Is he trying to flirt?

“I’m glad you joined our team too!” Kurt says, just to be safe, but then he adds: “I’m even glad that the two of us had our little adventure this morning.”

“Yes, although I will forever detest Sebastian.”

Kurt shrugs.

“I don’t. Because of him, we had more time together.”

Kurt really, really hopes he isn’t overstepping and that he understood Blaine correctly.

“Yeah, that is one way to look at it,” Blaine says back with a smile.

Kurt wants to say something more, but then his phone beeps. He knows what it is. He set an alarm for himself. He’s meeting up with some other people, but he so desperately wanted to meet Mimi and see Blaine, so he added this to his already busy day.

“Ah. I… have to go.”

Kurt puts his empty coffee cup down and he lets Mimi jump off his lap. He already misses her warmth.

“Okay.”

“But thanks for having me.”

“Always. Mimi loves you.”

“And I love her,” Kurt says and on a cue, Mimi barks.

Blaine walks Kurt to his front door and Kurt realises he really doesn’t want to leave, and that he wants to stay here with Blaine and Mimi, but he’s made these plans with the others weeks ago so he really cannot bail.

“Will I see you again?” Kurt asks as he puts on his coat.

Blaine has an amused look on his face.

“We will see each other tomorrow at work, remember?” he says.

Kurt lets out a small laugh. He knows that, but that’s not what he meant.

“Outside of work, dummy,” Kurt clarifies and Blaine turns red, either from embarrassment or something else.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“With Mimi?”

Kurt thinks about that. He loves Mimi and he’d love to see her again, but the idea of just going somewhere with Blaine sounds appealing as well. He tells Blaine that. Blaine turns even redder and Kurt’s pretty certain he must look the same.

“Are you, uh, asking me on a date?” Blaine asks.

“Yes,” Kurt says, “Interested?”

Blaine nods eagerly.

“Definitely. I’ve been meaning to get to you know me ever since I first saw you!”

“Ah well, as I said, maybe it’s a good thing that 10 animals escaped this morning,” Kurt says.

His phone beeps again. Shit, he really needs to go if he wants to catch his train.

“I’ll text you, okay?” Kurt asks.

“Okay.”

“Yeah.”

And with that last eloquent word, he leaves Blaine’s apartment.

--

They have their first date the weekend after. It’s nothing glamorous. They have coffee at a local place and then pick up Mimi to go for a walk.

It’s absolutely perfect.

Blaine’s also picked up a picnic blanket and the three of them bask in the sun in the park. There’s a fenced off area for dogs, so Mimi can roam free and Kurt and Blaine take a lot of photos, because they can.

But all good things come to an end.

Blaine’s rolling up the picnic blanket and Kurt’s holding Mimi and scratching her behind her ear.

“See you on Monday, huh?” Kurt says.

“Yup.”

Kurt holds out Mimi so Blaine can take her. It’s time to go.

And Blaine does want to take her, because Kurt’s pretty sure he wouldn’t get away with kidnapping Mimi. Kurt moves closer so that he can put Mimi in his arms.

Once Mimi’s settled, she nestles herself in Blaine’s embrace and Kurt’s heart melts. He wishes he could just kiss Blaine.

And then Kurt realises that maybe he can.

He can’t help it. Blaine’s so close and Kurt leans in.

Blaine realises what Kurt’s aiming for and he doesn’t seem opposed to it, which is a win.

Kurt presses a kiss on Blaine’s lips as a goodbye. Blaine kisses back. Mimi lets out a bark, which makes Blaine laugh. It’s a bit awkward, because there is still some distance between them, since they don’t want to squash Mimi.

So Blaine puts Mimi down, much to her annoyance, but Kurt sees that as an invite to pull Blaine closer and he kisses him again.

--

That Monday, Kurt and Blaine see each other at the pre-school again. On their way to the staff lounge, they pass the classroom with animals.

“We should thanks them,” Blaine says, which makes Kurt adore him even more.

He’s right. They should.

Kurt opens the door so that the two of them can take a peek inside. For a split second, Kurt’s worried that some of them have gotten out again, but once he looks inside, he sees that all the animals are peacefully in their cages.

“Thanks guys,” Kurt whispers.

“Yeah, thanks! Even you, Sebastian!”

Kurt closes the door and the two walk to the staff room, hand-in-hand.

--

End notes: I hope you enjoyed. And that you love Mimi as much as I do. You can check my meme tag for memes about her, because I am me. And a shout out to @cerriddwenluna for naming Bear the mouse (kinda, she suggested naming a small animal after a big one) and @raenestee for naming Noodle the hedgehog and Nathaniel the rat.

[chazz-is-a-zelda-fan]

kaorupost wooohoooooo

sorry @r0yalgrimm-artz you asked and you shall receive <3

ohhh kaoru. where do i begin with you. this is all stuff i made up in my brain so if this doesn’t work in canon, shhhhhh

so the basic rundown is that kaoru is yusuke’s younger brother (he was adopted) and was enrolled in duel prep with chazz (did i mention he’s a selfship insert. sorrryyyy) and the two become super close friends despite their differences in standing. but after two years, yusuke’s parents die, and so kaoru is sent to north academy since his extended family can’t afford duel prep tuition. before he leaves, chazz gives kaoru light and darkness dragon and they both promise to make it into obelisk blue together

except for the part where chazz promptly forgets that because his brothers are assholes and continue to traumatize him for the rest of the time he’s in prep school :( yusuke promptly disappears and kaoru clings onto chazz’s memory and LaDD to fill this emptiness that he can’t remember. through a stroke of luck and skill, kaoru ends up catching sheppard’s attention and manages to get transferred back to duel academy. HOWEVER, when he’s moving back, this is the part in s1 where chazz is leaving DA to go to north. so they just miss each other :(

kaoru has a very specific request. even though he could easily be in obelisk blue, he absolutely refuses to join the blue dorm until he’s beaten chazz in a duel with LaDD. that was their pact, he’s gonna live up to it!! until he gets there. and chazz is gone. some digging around reveals the j-squad to be at the center of it, and kaoru being the borderline teenager with issues that he is, immediately hates all of them and seethes at them pushing chazz away.

when chazz returns, kaoru doesn’t get a chance to talk with him one-on-one until the end of the season. he’s picked to protect a spirit key, but it’s kind of weird since he’s made it obv that he wants nothing more than to defeat chazz and kind of hates everyone else. this is the first near-death experience, getting caught up in the abandoned dorm and dropping yusuke lore hints oooo (LaDD is sighing wondering where they went wrong lol) anyways, atticus and kaoru end up bonding over a vague memory of yusuke, but they don’t realize it’s him. atty helps kaoru figure out that yeah man, that’s pining, you’re gay. hope this helps ^^

s2 is where the fun comes in!!! he doesn’t get to explain to chazz how much their promise meant to him, but he’s gotta try. but when he does work up the courage, oops! the dorm’s brainwashed. so kaoru, having watched zane and atticus duel, and seeing the blue dorm go to shit, gets an idea.

he steals the dragon mask, invoking it to test out his theory. if losing to someone who’s part of the society is a surefire way to get into their ranks, what happens if a society member gets beaten by darkness? would it cancel out and break them free? LaDD refuses to go along with this plan, but kaoru doesn’t care. now as nightshroud, kaoru goes to duel chazz. he loses, and the dragon mask turns back into card form. chazz gives kaoru a whole speech about how he’s too useless to be wanted by any color, and kaoru gets torn apart by atticus yelling about how dangerous that plan was.

LaDD and kaoru reconcile, with the j-squad reluctantly admitting that kaoru isn’t all that bad, and kaoru promising to drop the petty grudges. they end up making a plan to save chazz, defeating him. then they go and save alexis (they being atticus and kaoru, chazz joins in to help alexis), and chazz still ends up tournament winner since he’s helping with the whole de-brainwashing thing

i don’t have much for s3. he almost dies again is that anything

during s4, both kaoru and atticus have consistent flashbacks to yusuke and the abandoned dorm. kaoru goes to investigate by himself and ends up in the world of darkness, LaDD being left to relay the message that kaoru’s trapped. most of the season plays out the same, but there’s still the issue of hey KAORU IS STUCK IN THE ABANDONED DORM. HELP

once yusuke is rescued and kaoru gets to reunite with his brother, he FINALLY gets to have the heart-to-heart he’s been meaning to with chazz for years. and then he gets embarrassed when chazz says he knew and he just didn’t have the chance to say it. atticus nods sagely in the background like “it was obvious, kaoru” “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!!!!” “hatchling this is a public space.” “NOT YOU TOO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!”

post-series, kaoru goes on to be a pro and later a manager, him and chazz frequently working with and for one another. it’s nice when your boyfriend is your boss and he’s your employee next month :P

OH. I AM SO SORRY FOR THE RAMBLE. I. I REALLY LIKE THIS GUY CAN YOU TELL. sorry if this is hard to understand it’s literally 1 am lol

[mrsweasley23]

Steve the voyeur gets rumbled (Part 5) NSFW

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

Full fic on ao3

Steve woke up to something warm and wet rubbing gently across his chest. What the fuck? Where was he? The last think he remembered was...

Fuck. Shit. Fucking fuck.

"Hey baby. It's okay. Just getting you cleaned up. You'd made quite a mess of yourself"

"Eddie. Oh, God. Eddie, I'm so sorry. Shit... I just..."

"Shhhhhh" Eddie purred, pressing his finger to Steve's lips. "As much as I would love to hear how you explain this one away, I need you to listen..."

"No, Eddie, I..."

"Do I need to gag you?" he smirked. Steve's cock traitourously twitched.

Eddie's deep brown eyes were boring down on his.

Steve shook his head.

"I can see you very much enjoyed my show, Steve"

He planted a gentle kiss on Steve's cheek, ripping a moan from his lips before he could stop it.

Eddie grinned, his eyes sparkling. "Oh we are going to have so much fun, Stevie"

"What..."

Eddie frowned, pressing his finger more firmly to Steve's mouth, dragging it along the full, bottom lip.

"I talk. You, Steve Harrington, have been a very bad boy"

Steve's head dropped towards his chest, bringing his hands up to his eyes.

"But I haven't exactly been a golden boy either. When you smashed drunk into the apartment a few weeks ago, I knew you were there. Believe me, the thought you were there, that you could hear me, drove me fucking wild. Hell, just being around you on a normal day drives me fucking nuts, I have to stop myself from touching you, from fucking biting a fucking chunk out of you"

Steve's head lifted a little. His eyes raised to Eddie's. A little shake of his head told Steve it wasn't his turn yet.

"But the idea that you would hear me fuck, that it might turn you on, that it make you think about me in that way. Fuck. I was unhinged. Tell me all about it, Stevie"

"I didn't mean to....but I was drunk and it sounded so hot. Sounded like you were both having so much fun"

"Did you touch yourself Steve?" the commanding voice was back. "Did you listen to me fuck and make yourself come?"

Steve flushed, dragging his eyes away from Eddie's.

"I stood outside your door and I made myself come. I'm sorry"

Eddie put his fingers under Steve's chin and lifted his face so their eyes were locked.

"No apologies. Did it feel good?"

Steve nodded hesitantly.

"Words, Stevie"

"It felt so fucking good, Eddie. I had to bite my arm so you didn't hear me"

"Could have sworn I heard a whimper the second time though..." Eddie smirked.

"Fuck. You know about that? I'm the worst fucking friend Ed. I'm so sorry"

"I said", he grabbed Steve's wrists tightly, "no apologies. I told you to come for me baby and you did"

"How did you know...?"

"You've been dancing around me, acting all weird since that night. I texted Rob when I was out, checking you were okay. She said you weren't saying over. I hoped you'd be hiding in your room. Tried to put on a good show for you"

"Oh, you did" Steve chuckled lightly. "It's all I've been able to think about. I didn't know I wanted...". He hesitated. "I've never wanted...a guy before"

"And now?"

"Eds, I've been doing everything in my power, just to hear you have sex"

"Tell me more about that.." Eddie pressed little kisses onto Steve's jawline. "Tell me what you did when I came back from the club"

"Eddie I can't..."

"Tell. Me"

Fuck. Steve was powerless.

"I listened to you fuck him. Call him a pretty boy. That made me so hot. I tried...I tried to finger myself but..."

Eddie's eyes shot wide. "You've been putting your fingers in yourself and thinking of me?"

Steve nodded.

"Holy. Fuck"

"But it wasn't enough. I couldn't... I wanted more. I wanted..."

"You wanted my cock?"

"Uh huh"

"I came so hard thinking about you fucking me. Listening to you come"

"Just like tonight?"

Steve nodded.

"Did you like my choice of playmate tonight?" Eddie chuckled.

"You found a Steve"

"Thought I'd fuck with you a bit. And the prospect of getting to scream your name drove me pretty fucking wild"

" 'Steve, I'm coming and it's all for you'." Steve recalled laughing.

Eddie flushed a little. "Too much?"

Steve shook his head.

"Judging by the state I found you in, I think it might've been"

"I could have come the moment he called me Your Steve"

And with that, Eddie crashed his lips towards Steve's, his hands snaking into Steve's hair. "You want to be my Steve?"

"More than anything. I want to be yours. I want every part of you and want you to take every part of me"

[bauhausdog]

i feel weirdly energetic for some reason, (◕‿◕) so im gonna talk about something in my mind a bit.

basically, i think that "learn the rules before you break then" and both "shape language is real, triangle can indicate danger" and "shape language isn't real, look at all these square characters, they have nothing in common" are kinda flawed and highlights what i think its a deeper problem on how we tackle art theory as a whole. Also, i think appeal is subjective and that, actually ugly or "unappealing" things have value.

skip to the star emoji if you just want to read my main point

I don't like how the drawing fundamentals are treated as a single canon, i personally don't believe in a single canon on, uh... pretty much anything, perception, even though there's quite a lot of objective ideas in it (like how lenses work, ambient occlusion, anatomy, etc.), that doesn't mean the way we make those connections and create theories based on them is objective and silver bullet proof. To make my point a bit clearer, I'm specifically talking when people refer to the "fundamentals" as the rules, to further sharpen my point of view, i rarely, if ever, believe in rules in art. To exemplify of what i mean, let's immerse a bit in the world of... uh.. renaissance era, although it would be delightful to rant about centralizing "art" as "beauty and skill" and those as whatever western society at the time thought it was good, i am not and i dont want to make a comparison of bigoted "beauty" guidelines to "uhmmm, not so objective aesthetics" guidelines, but i do want to use a specific pattern of thought in it.

Ok, so, (at least the art we known) from that era looks kinda the same right, that's because they had a somewhat set of ideas and values of what made "something pretty", and "good art", that is, realism = good. Ok, then let's say you, fellow artist, wake up in bed, and decide to read a hypothetical "art rules" book and decide to compare it to the "good art", you see how you should structure the steps of a drawing, how you should apply anatomy, how you should render shit, and so on. "golly gee, that's a bunch load of rubbish if i ever seen one" You might say, but you take another look at your 1500 deviantart gallery book, all of the popular mainstream artworks seem to have followed these steps, right? But there's something missing,

Here's a question, how do you make something new then? art right now doesnt look like reinassaince that much anymore. You might say "oh break the rules", im gonna get to that part, put that in the back of your head. Ok, so, how do you create something new? how would you create artwork? if you were trained like those famous painters, you would probably just follow their steps and mindset, and create similar artwork, but can you break the pattern while upholding restrict art guidelines? imo you can't

"bauhausdog, what does this have to do with cannons?" shhhhhh... im gonna get to that part.

So, art history taught us that, in a nutshell, people just ducked around and finded out, breaking that rigid art canon piece by piece, although it's worth noting that a lot of it was also ideological, but i want to shine a spotlight on the art part of this phenomenon, "art should have realistic colors" lol no, fauvism, "art represents reality" lol no, surrealism, "art should be realistic" lol no, modernism, "art should not be realistic" lol no, naturalism.

people broke that weird rigid old canon, and people learned that they could make new things bc of this experimentation.

Alright, let's tie evertyhing together so far, in the modern day, we have taken a lot of lessons based on these art movements, we absorved a lot of stuff, we have knowledge of almost everything, our process of drawing, our way of arting, our 'artstlye', is super varied, there is a lot of elements at our disposal, we can be as realistic as we can, as cartoonish as we can, we live in the same timeline as tawog and everything everywhere all at once, shows that mix different methodologies, philoshopies of art in one motion picture.

excuse my "middle-upper class got out of art school trust fund guy" term here, but we do live in a hypermodern reality, this is super, super cheesy, but it is everything, all at once :PPP.

Now, let's wrap the previous question, how do you create new stuff? experimenting, literally thinking outside, inside, and about the box, that box being our conception of art, also, the way we conceptualize art is super importqant, i mean, its literally the way our little heads organize what is a art and how do you art a thing.

"bauhausdog, you said something 30 minutes ago about the back of the head", ok, so, to talk abut how we conceptualize art, let's talk about, well, the thing. Until now, my thesis isn't breaking any new ground, i'm not proposing a solution, or at the very least pinpointing a problem, well, i can kill the rest of the birds with just a single stone, a quote stone.

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

"learn the rules before you break them", it seems reasonable at first, let's break down the phrase, "learn the [rules](...)" what is this "rules"?, well, it's the general notion of art fundamentals, "(...) before you "break" them", what breaking means, exactly? well, if we take fauvism, fauvism was about subverting naturalistic rendering as the "correct pretty" standard, fauvism is basically messing with colors, duck around, find out. This distinction is important to make, in my interpretation, "breaking" is equal to that, experimenting outside a strict set of guidelines.

But wait, did you catch it? the weird connection with these two sentences, "learn this general set of rules, then you can experiment and get to your own conception of what art is", this sounds weirdly similar, where i've heard that before....

this is where it all comes together, follow me on this logic for a bit. Based on what I talked about the art movement argument, i said that previous experimentation (eg: modernism) lead to a better conception about art and its elements in general (eg: learning about abstraction and how to incorporate that on an artwork with modernism), the give-away here is that we build upon to a better and more comprehensive understandment. So, the contradiction to me is, if you need to learn and build upon a certain set of guidelines to then be able to do your own thing, there is something wrong with this set of rules.

To me it is just so weird that these rules just ignore that we live in a world of everything, why a "wrong" color palette is wrong? why airbrushed pillow shading is wrong?

and i'm not crucifying this one phrase, in my opinion, this is part of a wider acceptance of just this general "art guidelines" that you need to learn to improve.

What i am criticizing here is a generalized "art conceptualization canon" that fails to consider the subjectivity of aesthetics and caters to a mainstream type of art, and is tunnel visioned and doesn't teach art beyond the bite sized pieces of information.

I don't have a lot of examples to back this up, but what i do know is, there's no agreed upon, universal opinion on whats appealing or not, what works or what doesn't, what's true or what's not. The only example i will bring up is this. perfect perspective is bullshit, like, persperctive is the least broken rule here, perspective should not always be drawing straight lines converging trhough a point, honestly, freehand it, use your knowledge to distort it. "draw straight lines converging to a point" is a bit shallow

In my opinion, art should be taught in a more hollistic way even down to the little details, actually, i think it would be beneficial to teach a hollistic view in art as a whole, as in, the individual elements don't live in a vacuum. And also, there should be an emphasis on different aesthetic values (eg: naturalistic, western comic book, modernistic, eastern) and be mindful of the subjectfullness of aesthetics.

In conclusion, i think we should start refering to the general "fundamentals" as like, "post-modern western society's theory on illustration aesthetics" or in an actual serious manner something like "objective art theory". that's still a janked mess of a broken, but i would much prefer structuring things as like "perceptual color theory", "emotional color theory", "western color theory", instead of plain "color theory"

tldr: "art fundamentals" are a bit reductive, tunnel visioned and puts a single set of aesthetic values on a pedestal

also, a bit of a tangent, but i dont believe in a universal appeal at all, "dont shade with airbrush", "dont pillow shade" there's at least one human being that really, really likes the look of airbrush with a pillow shading look, just follow your art honestly, even if it is ugly, who cares, ugliness should be celebrated, not in the "not conventional" kind of way, i mean graffiti is beautiful, but i hated graffiti, acne looks pretty, but im still trying to unlearn to hate acne.

extra tangents: i think that color theory reflects certain aesthetic values and is not universal (dont have anything to prove but a suspicion), let people do random ugly shit for fun, "bad" art has value.

sorry if it doesnt sound coherent as much as i try to push my brain power my head feels foggy when i try to talk about something

I will add to this more later

[querte07]

WhateverIFeelLiketober

The prompts me and @fanstasticbook worked on over October!

...Yeah i know this is super late shhhhhh

Goofy Goober OC by Fanstasticbook

...The yuri,,,

We exchanged our monthly PFPs for a prompt, I also played around in CSP because I did the free trial and all

Machine

Spiky goober

Four if Fanstasticbook was the CEO of everything (btw every friday we drew agt 4 as the prompt)

They will not happen, but I think sharklings are cool...

Some goober pumpkin OCs from a while back, they're some of my faves

Also they're child n' mother respectively just for those curious about the OCs (I am talking to basically nobody nobody is following me on here)

Spooder, from same set of OCs as the previous day

Decided I wanted to be awesome for day 10 so I just did

These designs are some Fanstasticbook came up with btw not me lol

Umbrellas in character design.

Need I say more?

Yummy borger !!

Another goober enters the ring, this one being related to @crossthesplatside (whenever we finally get to posting more about the projects 💀)

Once upon a time I designed different looks for different names the Zoologist from Terraria has available and this one is basically my favorite

B̴̛͚̭͕̩̳̮͈̮̲̙͓̤̱̞͎́̉̊̔͋̈́̓͌̕͘e̶̦͈̭̝̪̞̻̘̰̽̅p̷̼͈͍̰̞̔̄̾̑̈́͒̉̕̕͠i̶̡̱͉̣͕͇͈̳̼̓̐̔̔̑̈́ͅs̶̻̜̻̥̪͔̹̺̥͓̲͂̈́̒̅̀̐.̴̨̛̯͕͆͛̊̈̎̈́̈́͛̕̚ͅ

It's probably really hard to read but!! Made a dualie type based on pez dispensers

Also 'Spoolies was short for something and I forgot what it originally was entirely...

Ghostie designs :>

Just came up with these after looking into some short folklore on them and such, some are just more original ideas

Old octoling OC that's also relevant to a future project eventually, we'll see when I finally have something to show off for that

Book designed her originally btw

Crossover drawings are always a lot of fun, so here's Genny from Fire Emblem Echoes: Shadows of Valentia in Marie's outfit!

My favorite moment from the Splatoon Movie was when Agent 4 said "I'm gonna goober" and goobered all over the place

Once again Cross and B-Side are related to @crossthesplatside for whenever we work on it more. Gotta love how the creative mind jumps away from projects right when you finally start making them public!!

Redesign of an old witch OC of mine

Didn't turn out great but I messed around with an ASCII TV-head face

Once again related to posts for days 8 and 9, something might eventually come from this project. A webcomic maybe.

EXTREME YURI ATTACK!!! AGENT24AGENT24AGENT24 GRAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

Drummer for Fanstasticbook's custom splatband!

Bad endings💔

...A little too intense for comfort, Sunny. Might wanna just work on completing Kettles.

Candle half based on the design of Paraffin in Terraria's Split mod

Corrupted lamia kinda Terraria related. Bit horrific so I'm sorry if it's unsettling to anyone.

Goober interaction (Marie stole the lollipop from Cal I can't believe she's done this)

Final day will be in a separate post 'cause I reached the 30 image attachment limit...