#// I have felt like shit since Tuesday morning

[gccdstories]

// yesterday was horrible. Started when I woke up with a headache. No (big) deal, I get them all the time. So I took my medicine and went to work.

Boy was THAT a mistake! Barely made it to lunch as it was, and I knew I had to be back to finish out the last three hours because it was just me and all. (At that point, I'm still just thinking it's a bad headache that isn't going away.)

Go home with an (extended) lunch to take a nap and immediately fall asleep. When I wake up, the head is a little better, and I think "okay, I can do three more hours."

Wrong, AGAIN!

I do make it to work, I do manage to finish the shift, but by that time, I'm exhausted, my head is still killing me, my throat is on fire and I can barely talk and every single part of my body just hurts. In that "I got hit by ten trucks" feeling.

Needless to say, I came home and immediately went to sleep. Slept all night, and well into this morning (b/c work had said I could come in late to get a bit more sleep, etc.) However I wake up feeling even worse (I wasn't sure how that was possible, but apparently it was) so I made a doctor's appointment.

They tested the usual -- flu, covid, strep throat, etc.-- all of which were negative. So... good? I guess.

I've been doing so much sleeping lately, and I did manage to eat a bit earlier which helped my head settle down.

And getting all the kitty love as neither Xaden or Sasha have left my side for the whole thing.

(It's also a good thing that I was off tomorrow anyway, so I have until Friday to get "all better" before dealing with work again.)

[jjscrybaby]

𝑻𝑹𝑨𝑪𝑲 𝑻𝑯𝑹𝑬𝑬 💿 — 𝒄𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒂

jj maybank x fem!reader | fluff | (reader has hair, a fight, mentions of sex, kissing.)

masterlist.

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

JJ Maybank’s type was simple; girls that he never had to see again. It didn’t matter what colour hair they had, their height or personality, all he cared about was the sex and the lack of them the next morning. It was a running theme though that the majority of the girls he went for were Pogues, loud, reckless and naughty.

He was a man whore, all his friends loved to tease him about it but in reality it was deeper than that. It wasn’t that he’d never thought about falling in love like they did in the movies Sarah watched, it was the fear he felt when he’d think of that. The idea of being stuck with someone, giving them all of your trust when they could so easily walk away, he didn’t like the thought.

Not to mention, he’s not the ideal boyfriend. He’s been locked up more times than he could count, he smoked weed like he was drinking water and he was easily angered which always ended with his fist in another man’s face.

He didn’t want to be at the bar alone, but non of his friends would go with him. John B and Sarah were staying in, Sarah couldn’t drink due to the pregnancy and John B felt bad to go out without her, Cleo and Pope were having a movie night and he didn’t feel like listening to them bicker about morality and shit, Kiara was on a date with her new girlfriend and he definitely wasn’t invited to that. So, that lead to him stepping into the bar by himself ready to drink himself to death.

JJ was a regular at the Tangled Line, a bar on the edge of the pier which he’d been going to since he was fifteen. He knew everyone in there, the regular old men that sit in the corner, the owners who should be divorced but aren’t and the staff. That’s why he’s shocked when he takes a seat at the sticky bar and comes face to face with you.

“What can I get for you?” Your voice is sweet but professional, something he doesn’t hear a lot in this kind of place.

You don’t look like you belong here, a ropey bar full of old men that are sure to spend their night shamelessly flirting with you. You look too sweet. Too good. You may be the most beautiful girl he’s ever laid his eyes on, and for the first time maybe ever he’s at a loss for words.

“Um, yeah, just a lager,” he mumbled, eyes stuck on the kind smile you shoot him as you turn to grab a glass to make his drink.

“Five dollars, please,” you request, placing the drink in front of him.

He rummages through his jean pockets to find the loose cash he’d grabbed from Pope’s wallet — Pope wouldn’t mind — and placed a few notes down. You put the cash in the register and went back to standing, no other customers around. It was nine pm on a Tuesday, so that wasn’t much of a surprise.

“So, what’s your name?” JJ asked, after taking a few sips of his drink. You looked over at him, as if checking he was talking to you. “I just haven’t seen you around here before.” You introduce yourself, giving him a shy smile. It was obvious you hadn’t expected him to take any notice of you, and that made his confidence grow. “You just moved here?”

“Yeah, uh, my nan lives here,” you explained. “She offered for me to come stay with her for a bit, see if I like the change.”

“And do you?” He smirked, sipping his drink once again.

“Haven’t decided yet,” you shrugged sheepishly, fiddling with a charm bracelet on your wrist. “It’s only been a couple weeks, and I haven’t had the chance to meet anyone yet.”

“Yeah, this place ain’t exactly huge with the young folk,” JJ responded.

You let out a giggle and it’s like music to his ears, he grins back at you. “I’ve noticed, yeah. You’re probably the first person in here that’s not over forty.”

“Maybe I just look really good for my age,” he smirked.

“Maybe,” you giggle again, before an older man comes over for a refill and you walk to the other side of the bar.

JJ can’t take his eyes off of you as you work, and when you notice your cheeks heat up with a pink tint. He’s not sure what’s wrong with him, he has an urge to jump over the bar and kiss your glossy lips until you’re putty in his hands. It’s not the same feeling he gets with hookups, though, with them it’s all lust for his own pleasure; he feels like he wants to put you in his pocket and never let you out.

“So, what made you want to make the change?” He carried on the conversation when you walked back over towards him, not giving you a chance to go too far away.

“Uh, I don’t know,” you shrugged. “My nana said I needed to let loose, stop being so uptight. My mom wasn’t happy with me moving but she agreed in the end.”

“Let loose, huh?” He smirked, downing the rest of his beer before leaning forward towards you. “What time do you get off?”

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

When you’d moved to the Outerbanks, you never expected to meet someone like JJ. Someone that actually paid so much attention to you that you usually felt yourself blushing, someone who lives life in such a peculiar way.

He lives with all of his friends, and he works for their own business in a building that they built. You figured he’d only pay attention to you for a couple days, he already had a life here, but it had been over a month and you were still waking up with texts from him.

“Havin’ fun?” Kiara sat next to you, a smirk on her lips as she took in the sight of you. She’s never seen someone go to a party and read, but there’s a first time for everything.

“Yeah,” you smiled, looking over at her. She gave you a look, as if to say really? You sighed, smile still on your face. “Parties aren’t really my kind of thing, but JJ wanted me to come.”

“It’ll probably take awhile to find him, he gets easily distracted,” Kie joked, making you giggle.

“I don’t mind waiting,” you shrugged, nodding to the book that laid open in your lap.

“It’s nice, seeing JJ like this. He isn’t normally one to keep girls around.” Kiara was clearly tipsy, ready to reveal every secret about JJ she could think of. You couldn’t help but furrow your brows, looking at her as she carried on speaking. “He seems to really like you.”

“You think so?” You asked softly, hopefully.

She nodded her head, giving you a drunken smile. “I hope it works out. You’re fun, for someone that sits and reads books at parties. And I think you’d be really good for him.”

Before you can ask her what she means, her girlfriend calls for her and she goes stumbling away. You look around until your eyes land on JJ, he’s already looking at you.

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

JJ had become a regular at the Tangled Line, not for the booze but for you. He’d sit at the bar and chat to you throughout your shift, and then he’d drive you back to your nana’s house afterwards. Tonight, he’d shown up and had a couple beers, which then turned into vodkas.

You only had an hour left, most of the time you were just wiping down the bar to give you something to do so you weren’t just staring at the clock. You were halfway through a conversation with JJ, giggling at one of his flirty jokes, when you got interrupted.

“Oi!” Your head swivelled at the sound of an annoyed voice, an older man who you’d served earlier on stood there. “Gonna do your fuckin’ job or what?”

“I’m sorry—” you went to apologise, but JJ beat you to it.

“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to?” JJ was standing now, walking towards the man who had a scowl on his face.

“Not you,” he argued. “Get me a—”

“Nah, don’t talk to her. I’m talkin’ now,” JJ interrupted, once again. They were chest to chest now, and you were just watching with wide eyes. You’d never seen him like this, eyes narrowed and face red in anger. “Now, why don’t you try and ask nicely, huh? She don’t owe you shit.”

“It’s her damn job. Ain’t my fault she’s too busy whorin’ herself out to you to do her job—” he was cut off with JJ’s fist connecting with his cheek, sending her head to the side.

“JJ!” You exclaimed, covering your mouth in shock as the two of them started to fight.

JJ had the upper-hand the majority of the time, but the older man managed to get a few good hits in. By the time they were being dragged apart, JJ was spitting blood and the other was almost entirely unconscious.

“You need to get out of here!” You exclaimed to him, watching someone pull out their phone to call the cops.

“Fuck, no!” JJ argued.

“JJ,” you plead, trying to push him out the door.

“You comin’ with me?” He asked, looking down at you. His eye was starting to swell and blood stained his nose and lips.

“I’m gonna have to go grovel for my job—” you began to argue. He grabbed ahold of your waist, shaking his head.

“You hate this job. And I don’t want you workin’ here, servin’ other people that talk to you like that jackass. I’ll help you find another job, okay? I promise. Just come with me,” he begged.

You hesitated, looking back at where the man JJ had hit was slowly coming back to it, being held back by another man as he tried to get at JJ. You could see your boss coming out from the back, looking around in confusion. Your eyes landed on JJ, the determination in his eyes that he wasn’t going to leave without you.

“Fine, come on,” you sighed, ignoring the smirk that played on his bloody lips.

His fingers laced through yours and the two of you made a run for it out the building and down the road, he was chuckling but you didn’t find any of this amusing. You shoved at his arm once the two of you were far enough away.

“What?” He laughed.

“It’s not funny, JJ! You’re bleeding,” you argued, finally taking a proper look at the damage. He didn’t look that bad, once the blood was washed away there would probably only be a few bruises, but the sight still made your stomach churn.

“C’mon, baby, he deserved it,” JJ murmured, leaning down towards your face.

You sighed, pulling your hair from ponytail it was in to run your fingers through it. He reached for your waist, wrapping his arm around your back to hold you close to him.

“You’re an idiot,” you huffed, resting your face in his chest for a moment. “I can’t afford not to have a job.”

“We’ll get you a new one, one without old pricks who think they can talk to you like that,” JJ reassured, pressing a soothing kiss to your temple.

You wanted to shout at him, maybe even walk away and just go home. You’d never seen JJ like that before, John B had mentioned a few stories of JJ being in fights but you didn’t realise it could get that bad. You’d been a bit afraid at all the yelling and the blood splatters, but you couldn’t help the smugness you felt; he’d fought for you.

︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶

As promised, JJ got you a new job at the Wreck where Kiara and her family worked. He’d had to beg her to do him this favour, but luckily for both him and you, Kiara had become fond of you and she didn’t hate the idea of working with you.

You were locking up the restaurant, it was your turn to stay late and lock up, when you stepped outside you were met with a familiar camper-van and an even more familiar blonde leaning against it.

“I thought John B banned you from borrowing the Twinkie?” You teased, walking towards him.

He smirked back at you, shaking his head. “Sarah was bein’ sick so he was too busy to notice me take the keys.”

“Naughty,” you giggled, letting him open the passenger door for you. “I didn’t know you were pickin’ me up.”

“You haven’t got plans, right?” He checked, ignoring your statement.

You shook your head and he grinned, closing your door before jogging around to get in the drivers seat. You asked countless times where you were going, but each time he’d just give your knee a squeeze and turn the radio up higher. He pulled up at the beach, but an area you hadn’t seen before. It was secluded behind some rocks, just a small area of sand and the sea.

“What’s this?” You asked as he helped you step over the rocks.

“It’s my place,” he shrugged, sitting down on the sand. You sat next to him and his arm gravitated to wrap around your waist, a gentle kiss pressed to your cheek. “I— I wanna talk to you, ‘bout somethin’, guess I’ve been too afraid to do it.”

“Afraid? Of what?” You looked at him worriedly, resting your hand on his bicep comfortingly.

He gulped, giving you an anxious smile. “Y’don’t know much about how I was before you moved here, don’t really like talkin’ about it. I don’t want you to think of me like that, how everyone else does.”

“What do you mean, Jayj?” You asked gently.

“I’m not a good guy,” he murmured, looking out to the ocean. “And I don’t mean that in a self-pity way, it’s just a fact, y’know? I sleep with loads of girls and never call them back, I get in fights and end up locked up, literally every cop on this damn island knows me by name.”

“Really?” You didn’t sound judgmental, just surprised, and that’s what gave him the strength to keep going.

“My old man’s not a good guy either, guess I just grew up thinkin’ all this shit was right and now I’m older I know it’s not, but I could never get out of the habit of treatin’ everyone like shit. But then… well, then you came along,” he explained, voice softening at the end as he turned to look at you.

“Me?” It had been impossible to work out what you and JJ were. He flirted, sure, he’d hold your hand and kiss your forehead and beg for you to hangout with him, but he hadn’t outright said how he felt. You knew how you felt, though. You knew that whenever his eyes met yours your stomach would flutter, you knew that your waist would burn from his touch and you’d stay up late thinking of him when you couldn’t sleep.

“Yeah, baby, you,” he confirmed, a teasing tone. “I ain’t ever had proper feelings for a girl, guess that’s why it’s taken me so damn long to admit it to you.”

“Still haven’t,” you beamed, cheeks flushed and eyes excited.

He chuckled, turning his full body to face you. His hands cupped your cheeks and he leant forward so your breath was mingling with his. “I love you.” Your eyes widened, you hadn’t been expecting that. “That okay?”

“Yeah, definitely okay,” you whispered back. “I love you, too.”

He leant in and his lips touched yours, moving gently against your own. His hands were cold against your skin, but you never wanted him to let go. You brain went fuzzy and you pulled away slightly, breathing hard.

“You remind me of home,” you murmured softly, running your fingers through his hair.

“You are home.”

[paradiseprincesss]

imperfect for you | jonathan crane

i saw the moodboard @mothhball made for jonathan cranes mornings, and i was like i must write a fluffy fic about this immediately! also this is inspired by imperfect for you by ariana grande because as an ari stan, i had to write something based off her songs and this fit perfect with this song.

summary: you and jonathan spend the morning together, and you're feeling a little anxious from the stressful week you've had - but not to worry, your psychiatrist boyfriend knows exactly how to calm you down and cheer you up.

warnings: reader has a shitty week lol, minor age gap, kissing, jon spoils the reader hehehehe just fluff really

word count: 1.3k

masterlist

it was a quiet sunday morning, the sunlight beamed through the window of you and jonathan's shared apartment, and you stirred softly, waking from your sleep. you softly opened your eyes as you quietly awoke from your slumber - but you felt the absence of arms wrapped around you.

turning around, you noticed that the other side of the bed was empty, and you glanced over to the sunshine that was starting to peek through the curtains covering your big window; it was peaceful, serene.

you could hear water running in the kitchen, and some dishes being moved around as well as what sounded like utensils. with a yawn, you reached over to the bedside table and unplugged your phone, scrolling through the notifications. after a few moments of looking through your phone and replying to a few unanswered messages from your friends, you toss the phone on the pillow beside you with a quiet little huff.

the week you had with truly a week sent from hell. nothing seemed to be going right for you - nothing! true story. it all started on monday when your alarm didn't go off, and you were embarrassingly late to your lecture, which your professor wasn't too happy about. after the last half hour of the lecture you managed to catch, you had to beg your professor to extend the deadline for an assignment you had forgotten to hand in over the previous weekend, god it was humiliating.

then tuesday rolled around, and it was like the universe was punishing you. as you were driving to the gym, the check engine light in your car flicked on.

so, wednesday came along...and you didn't have a car since it was getting serviced in the shop, and jonathan was at work but you had to get groceries. you didn't want to walk to the grocery store because you'd have to carry the heavy groceries all the way back to your apartment, so you spent a ridiculous amount of money on getting your groceries delivered.

thursday and friday came and went, nothing too crazy happened until the end of the day on friday. as you were on your way home from the mechanics, with your repaired car (were not going to talk about the financial damage that did), you received a notification on your phone that your grade was updated for the late project you handed in, and the grade was...well, it wasn't the best mark you received, let's just say that.

when it came to saturday, you spent the day napping and wallowing in self pity, because after the week you had - why wouldn't you? jonathan was unfortunately working on saturday, which was unusual but he occasionally worked an extra shift on saturday if he needed to work through any extra patient files, intake forms, prescriptions and such. after he was off work, you were already curled up in bed and fast asleep, so he quietly showered and got into bed with you.

and now, finally, were here - sunday morning.

"sweetheart?" jonathan's voice snapped you out of your mental reflection of the shit week you just had, and you quickly looked up to see your boyfriend leaning against the doorframe of the bedroom.

jonathan wasn't in his usual suit and tie - no, he was in his grey sweats (don't even get me started on what those did to you), and his black t-shirt, and his glasses.

"i called out your name because i thought i heard you and i thought you had woken up, but you didn't respond. i came in here to check on you - are you okay, sweetheart?" he asks softly, looking at you with an expression that was mixed with him being both concerned but smitten at you in your sleepy state, bedhead and all.

as soon as he finished his sentence, the tears started to fall. you didn't even notice them really, but as soon as he saw you start to cry, he was rushing to sit with you on the bed, wrapping his arms around you in hopes to comfort you. jonathan placed a chaste kiss on the top of your head and spoke softly to you.

"oh, sweetheart..." he takes his hand and tilts your chin up to look at your pretty face, and uses his thumb to wipe the tears streaming down your cheeks, "what's wrong?"

you choked back a sob as he asked you that, and you looked away, embarrassed. "i've just had such a shitty week, jon. i feel like such a failure." you mumble, feeling yourself get worked up emotionally.

"hey," he says gently, softly guiding you to look at him again, "deep breaths, my love, deep breaths. you are not a failure."

you look at him with a pouty expression and teary eyes, his words always had an effect on you. "i barely passed on my last assignment, and i just- i just feel like i fucked up. it's so stupid."

"i understand, i can't imagine how stressful that must be." he softly says to you, even though he can imagine how stressful that is, he studied to be a doctor after all - but to him, your feelings were always a top priority, he always wanted you to feel validated.

"and," you say, tears overflowing again, "since the car was in the shop, i had to get the groceries delivered to the apartment and it was expensive - and don't even get me started on the car. that was a nightmare, it was expensive to fix the stupid thing."

jonathan just chuckles softly, "i told you to use my card for things like that, sweetheart. groceries, car payments, shopping, all that - i gave you my other credit card specifically so that you wouldn't have to worry about that kind of stuff." jonathan says softly, kissing the top of your head again.

"...well, i was stressed, okay? i forgot you gave it to me." you say, looking up at him innocently.

he just shook his head and laughed softly, pulling you into a kiss, and kept his arms around you, to hold you close, keep you there, be there for you.

after a moment, you pulled away to whisper softly to him. "thank you for loving me even when i'm a mess."

he looks at you lovingly, "i'll love you under any circumstance, darling, don't be silly." he says to you, brushing his thumb over your bottom lip, the little action making your heart leap.

"before i knew you, i was always fucked up - like, so anxious all the time. emotionally distressed, i'm not even kidding...but i'm not like that since i met you." you say softly to him, as he kept you in his arms.

"you're the love of my life, you know that?" he mumbles against your lips as he leans in for another kiss, which you gladly let him do.

"you make the bad stuff delightful. i love you." you say, breathlessly, between kisses.

after he heard you say that, he kept you wrapped up in his arms, the two of you tangled slightly in between the white sheets of your shared bed, the sun gently glimmering through the window. for a moment, the world was still, just the two of you - perfection in a world of imperfection.

"i made breakfast and coffee..." he says softly, and took your hand in his, "we should have it before it gets cold."

you giggle softly with a nod, and take his hand letting him lead you into the kitchen.

these were your favourite kind of mornings, the ones spent with the man you love, the ones where you could blissfully ignore the world as you were too wrapped up in jonathans warm embrance to care about anything else.

[dazed--xx]

SKZ Break up Reaction (Maknae Line)

A/N:so I’m uploading this on my phone cause my 4 year old decided to break my chromebooks screen but I wanted to get this posted so I can post the second part to both anyway if you guys have any requests my requests are open any group you want me to write I usually do lol so just let me know anyway hope you enjoy please like comment reblog I love hearing your opinions

Jisung:

“GET OUT!” You shout, as you feel Jisungs arms wrap around your waist. You can feel his tears leaking through your shirt as he begs you to hear him out. Your tears streamed down your face. “you need to leave Jisung” You growl taking his arms from around you. His head shakes in panic “No! NO! Im sorry okay?! It was a mistake it didn’t mean anything to me” he cries. His shoulders shaking rapidly. You scoff at his words “Yeah for you it was just a fucking tuesday of course it wouldn’t mean shit to you. But the fact that you didn’t even think about me or I don’t know maybe the fact that you werent even single, proves to me that everything youre saying is bullshit. You don’t just go and fuck someone and then say Oops I made a mistake. You made a fucking choice Jisung and just cause it doesn’t mean anything to you now doesn’t mean you didn’t fucking do it and proves how much I cant trust you.” You snap, gesturing to the crying boy. Grabbing the bags you packed for him, you shove them at your ex boyfriend.

“I don’t want to go” Jisung confesses, his hand wrapping around your wrist pulling you back into him; burying your face in his chest. “Please don’t make me go, I don’t want to wake up every morning without you. I don’t want to let you go. It meant nothing then and now please believe me I don’t want anyone else it was a drunken mistake and I will never stop regretting it. I can make it up to you, I-I c-can fix things please—fuck—please don’t make me go. I love you” His sobs take over his body as you begin to pull yourself away from him. You stare at him, wanting to remember every inch of his face. You caress his cheek. Your eyes locking with one another “Im sorry, but I cant trust you anymore and I cant be with someone I cant trust. I want to break up. Im sorry but if you don’t leave. I will” You confess pulling your hand away from him. “Please....” He whines “Im sorry fuck im so sorry theres nothing I could be more sorry about I don’t know how to fix it. But I don’t want to leave please don’t make me leave, I need you okay? I need YOU! No one else I don’t know how to convince you of that” You shake your head at his words “You don’t need to convince me, you never will be able to Jisung, there’s never an excuse and I wont be able to trust you ever again. It will always feel like a lie.” His eyes widen in shock.

“i-I-” You lift your hand, not wanting to hear anymore “Just go, Jisung! Im done you hurt me way to much and I don’t want to hear your lies anymore” You growl. Nodding in defeat, he picks up his bags and makes his way to the door. You hold the door open for him as he makes his way out as he turns to face you once more you can feel your resolve breaking “I will always love you” he cries as you close the door.

Felix:

NEW MESSAGE: LIXIE💕☀️

Hey baby, just wanted to tell you good morning and I miss you when can I see you again? Its been too long😞

Your heart races as you read his message. Biting your lip you contemplate replying before deciding to lock your phone and continue avoiding him. You werent sure why he even bothered anymore, you knew he was pretending, and whilst he didn’t know you had learned the truth about him, you felt stupid every time you thought about seeing him. You were torn between the Felix you had gotten to know a bubbly sweet and kindhearted person that would give up their last for anyone in need, and the one that, apparently, likes to make bets with his friends about how long it would take for you to sleep with him. Its been a few days since you had been told the truth by Minho’s girlfriend, and ever since you had avoided Felix. You couldn’t help but feel anxious and idiotic anytime you thought about being near him, apparently he had won the bet, you did sleep with him fairly quickly considering you guys have been going out for only a few months and have been actively having sex since about your third date; and the idea that right after he went and reported his win to the boys made you feel dirty, gross, and used.

Your phone vibrating in your hand pulls you from your thoughts. Staring at the screen youre met with a photo of your smiling boyfriend. Pressing the decline button, you toss your phone on the bed lifting yourself to your feet. You stare around your room, pictures of you and Felix laugh at you as you grab the stuffed bear Felix had won for you on your second date. With a newfound resolve you toss the bear on the ground. Your body acting on its own accord as you begin throwing every symbol and memory of your relationship in a large destructive pile on the ground. Sobs rack through your chest, nausea building in your stomach. You trusted him, you allowed him to knock your walls down and he lied, pretended and faked his way through everything. With determination in your heart you stomp your way over to your bed grabbing your phone opening your messages with him.

To: LIXIE💕☀️

Please stop calling me stop texting me just leave me alone you won your stupid bet just leave me alone we’re done.

Your palms were sweating as your phone began vibrating once more. You stare at the photo of Felix, your jaw clenches as hot tears run down your face. You watch as the photo disappears a missed call notification coming in before the photo pops up once more. You sit in place as a plethora of calls continue to come in as well as messages all unseen. With a shaky breathe you turn your phone off, opting to take a shower you trudge your way to the bathroom. Your movements halt at the rapid knocks on your front door. “Babe! Please—fuck—open the door!” Felix’s deep voice pleads. Your hand smacks over your mouth, as you hear your doorknob rattling “Y/N! Open up please” he cries. “Let me explain!” The knocks continue in quick succession. “P-please! I-I c-can’t lo-lose y-yo-you, n-not like t-this please!” His voice is desperate, you could tell he was crying. “I’m sorry” the door begins to shake. You could tell he was trying to ram the door open. “I’m sorry! Please talk to me, we can’t be over we can’t Im an idiot but you mean so much to me don’t break up with me I’m sorry! I’ll explain I’ll tell you everything please” your sobs unable to be hidden anymore “Y/N?! Are you crying? Please—fuck—don’t cry please I’m sorry please open the door please! I need to see you. I need you to listen please open up!” He pleaded. You stared at the door as your heart pounded on your sternum as Felix pounded on your door. You apologized silently as you sat on the ground your arm wrapped around your waist as you held your hand over your mouth; tears steadily streaming down your face not being able to bring yourself to open the door.

Seungmin:

You stared blankly at the mahogany table, avoiding Seungmins bored stare. “Why did you ask me to meet you here if you weren’t going to say anything?” He questions confusion etched on his features You sat in shock at his words, you weren’t sure why you were so surprised at the cold stoic tone he used. It had always been the same with him anyway always leaving you to feel small under his judging gaze. You questioned the status of your relationship often due to the lack of affection on either part. You felt more like a close friend rather than his girlfriend or even someone he was dating, and whilst you two had never defined your relationship, you did assume from the fact that he had specifically told you that he had considered the time you two spent together as dates. You stared at your hands as your fingers continued to play with themselves in your lap. “I’m sorry…” you murmur, you hear him hum in response “it’s fine everyone has bad days” you shake your head in response “n-no…I’m sorry but I don’t think we should see each other anymore” your voice is almost a whisper but the widening of Seungmin’s eyes has you shocked. “C-Can I ask why? I thought things were going well…” he questions his hand reaching for yours sadness flashes across his features as you shift yourself further away from him “we’re more friends than anything don’t you think” you mumble disappointedly. “Friends?” He scoffs like the term was beneath him. “I’d like to think we are more than friends” he states calmly.

You wrap your arms around your waist “honestly can you name a single time we’ve done anything that could signify that we’re more than friends” you snap. Seungmin leans back in his seat, taking a sip of his coffee. “We go out on dates…umm I talk to you all the time…” he trails as he contemplates more answers only to come up with nothing and letting out a sigh. “It’s okay…you aren’t attracted to me Seungminie, not the way I am to you and I think you should find a girl you actually like” you state sadly as you lift yourself from your seat. “Goodbye…” you mumble as you make you’re way out of the café. Seungmin sat there in shock, a tear running down his cheek as you make your exit. He willed himself to say something, anything to get you to stay. He watched in horror as you made your way out of the door. His heart shattering in his chest as he wills you to turn around and just see him, see how he’s falling apart at your departure. He’s begged for every moment with you and in his idiocy you were wisped away, he felt lost what could he do?

Jeongin:

“You’re really wearing that?!” The disgust oozing out in his tone. You look down at your lilac skin tight dress and white thigh highs before nodding with confusion etched on your features a pout in your lips. “I-is there something wrong with what Im wearing?” You prod your eyebrow raising in offense. Jeongin scoffs, crossing his arms over his chest. You stood in your place, biting your lip in frustration “I mean you look really…..interesting.” He grits. You could feel the uncomfortable stares. You knew what he meant by interesting, reflexively you tug on the hem of your dress bringing it lower on your legs. “Don’t listen to him you look great!” Nayeon smiled as she rubbed your wrist comfortingly. You nod dejected, your eyes not leaving the ground. “I-I’m going to get something to drink” you state rapidly as you rush over to the kitchen. You stare down at your dress, you felt stupid and thanked god you had brought a hoodie. Taking a deep breath you grab a red solo cup pouring a small bit of vodka and adding pineapple juice before mixing the drink. You stare into the concoction, as used to Jeongins temperament and the harshness of his tone you are, you contemplate as to why you had even entered this torturous relationship.

You couldn’t think of many times when Jeongin would speak to you without insulting you in some shape or form. From your hair being the wrong way to you just being too annoying for his taste that day there was always something you did wrong. You thought today would be different, you thought for once he’d actually acknowledge you the way he used too when you first began. Your heart completely shattered considering it was your second anniversary. Your relationship was fantastic up until just a few months ago and now it feels like Jeongin would rather drop dead before even looking at you anymore. You don’t know why you had bothered anymore it obviously wasn’t working. You’ve done everything you could to try to save your relationship tonight being your final attempt and as much as you wanted to give the rest of the night a chance; he couldn’t even acknowledge your anniversary all day and then to greet you like that at a party you didn’t even want to be at. You weren’t sure if you could continue this, you missed your loving, sweet boyfriend. You didn’t know who this Jeongin was. You sighed as you take a sip from your drink. The mixture of alcohol to juice lacking so you grab the vodka bottle once more.

“Sure get drunk so I have to take care of you tonight” you hear from behind you, you roll your eyes. “What? I’m literally just making my first drink” you scoff before turning and shoving past your boyfriend his hand wrapping around your arm “oh and thanks for embarrassing me tonight by the way” he spits. An embarrassing heat fills your cheeks “how did I embarrass you?” You growl a fire burning in your eyes. “You’re kidding right?” His lips are formed in a tight line, you press your chest against his in defiance “No! How did I fucking embarrass you Jeongin?”

“So dressing like a slut to a party where you know your boyfriend and his friends are going to be isn’t a fucking problem? It’s not embarrassing?” He snaps, the glare in his eyes challenging you. The rage filling your stomach you toss your drink in his face. “I can’t believe you! You fucking prick” you shout, Jeongins eyes grow wide at your action. He stood there shocked, covered in your drink, his hands reaching for you quickly with a call of your name. You put your arms up preventing him from touching you. “No! I’m done! I’m so fucking done with you Jeongin! For months I’ve put up with your shitty attitude all because I loved you and you obviously don’t feel the fucking same anymore! You made me miserable and I still loved you! Don’t call me don’t text me just leave me alone. Happy anniversary Jeongin, I’m giving you the best gift I could…you’re single congratulations” your resolve completely breaking as tears stream down your face. You can see the panic in Jeongins eyes, his mouth sits agape in shock. With a scoff you turn to make your exit. “W-wait! Where are you going?” He calls, his voice is shaky. “Babe?!” You can hear him following after you “wait! Y/N!” His voice is shaky as you make your way out the front door, you knew if you turned back just one look at his face would break you. You had to keep going; you picked up your pace as the cold air kissed your skin.

Your car was only down the street a bit you just had to make it there and you were home free. Your heart raced as your legs moved rapidly. You felt arms wrapped around your waist pulling you back into a strong frame. The familiar cologne fills your nostrils, you could feel his shaking figure. “Don’t go, I’m sorry” he pleads. You sigh “please let me go Jeongin” pulling his arms from around you not turning to look at him. “I’m sorry please don’t go im an idiot I didn’t mean to forget but I don’t think it’s something you should break up with me over” he scoffs slight annoyance in his tone. A scowl forms on your face as you whip around to look him in his eyes “you know what?! Yeah! You ARE indeed a fucking idiot! If you think I’m breaking up with you over this bullshit ass anniversary then you’re wrong! You treat me like shit and a burden and I’m just done you obviously don’t love me anymore and as much as I do love you I deserve better just…please leave me alone…” tears stream down your face at a rapid pace, your heart shattering at every word. Your eyes drifting to the floor as your bottom lip finds it’s way between your teeth. Your eyes never once lifting to meet his as you turn away from him and make your way to your car. You don’t see Jeongin standing there in horror as you ultimately walk away from him. You don’t hear the sound of his heart shattering in his chest as you don’t look back at him. His jaw clenched as tears stream down his cheeks willing himself to not chase after you because like you said, you did deserve better

[the-guilty-writer]

Work The Case

Request from @doctorsteeb: This may be too sensitive a topic but just an idea— Hotch!daughter taking out a school shooter?

Aaron Hotchner x daughter!reader

Summary: A normal Tuesday takes a turn when you come face to face with your father's work.

A/N: Not going to lie I wasn't going to write this because I felt like the idea was too sensitive but then I remembered that I'm the queen of writing too sensitive things in real life so I may as well do that here too (within limits of course. I still have ethics). So here it is!

CW: school shooting, fatal gun shot, talks of foyet, talks of dead mothers, talks of car crashes, talks of drunk driving, talks of divorce, Jackson Pollok slander

---

The morning started out like any other Tuesday: you got up and ready for the day before having breakfast with your dad and brother- oatmeal and orange juice- then your dad drove you and Jack to school. Jack always got dropped off first at the elementary school, and you at the high school. The ride between the two was short, but it was always long enough for a small, private conversation between you and your father.

“You okay?” he asked you. 

Ugh. Profilers.

“I’m…” You thought about saying ‘fine,’ but you knew he wouldn’t take that as an answer. You sighed. “The teacher let the class vote on what chapter we would cover in class next, so we started on abnormal criminal psychology yesterday.”

“Oh.” You’d never heard your dad sound so uncertain.

“It’s an extra chapter. Since it’s not listed in the curriculum we aren’t being tested on the material. The teacher told me I could spend that period in the library if it was… too much,” you finished.

You dad pulled in front of the school, leaning over to kiss you on the forehead goodbye. “Whatever you need, sweetheart.”

“Thanks,” you told him. 

“Try to have a good day,” he said before you shut the car door.

You nodded. “I’ll try.”

---

You took your teacher’s offer and went to the library instead of their classroom. The space was large, but mostly empty of people- there was just the librarian behind her desk and a few students scattered amongst the tables. You took a seat and pulled out your homework, trying not to think about what they were learning back in the classroom. You’d honestly overheard enough phone calls that whatever they were learning about you already knew. There was a buzz in your pocket, which automatically made you freeze. You kept your phone on do not disturb through the school day. The only reason your phone would buzz would be if your dad was texting you… and if your dad was texting you it was an emergency.

You pulled your phone out and you were right- it was a text from your dad. Three words: Work the case.

Shit. That was code for you and Jack to hide- to hide somewhere that you wouldn’t be found unless you wanted to be. You looked around the library, but the area was like an open plain. You shoved your work in your backpack and hurried towards the doors-

BOOM!

A gunshot.

Boom! Boom! Boom!

People began to scream. Through the glass windows of the library you could see students running, but it wasn’t because they were late to class. The lockdown alarm sounded and you scrambled under one of the tables, hoping it would be enough cover.

There was a stillness and a silence for a minute and you hoped that it was over, but gunshots rang out again- this time they were louder than they had been before. Someone was getting closer.

Your heart was pounding in your chest, making it feel as though your entire body was thumping to its too-fast rhythm. You wanted to cry, but you didn’t shed any tears. You wondered if this was what it had been like for Jack when Foyet had killed your mother and then tried to kill your father. As part of WISTEC, you had been sent away to a private boarding school with an alias while Jack and your mom were sent elsewhere. In the end, sending you away had saved your life, but now you were wondering if you were going to die soon anyway.

That was, until the library doors burst open. From your view under the table you could only see old shoes and baggy jeans but you heard the shots that were fired into the air.

“Get up! All of you!” It was a male voice.

You, along with the six other students in the library that had all dropped to the floor, looked around at one another- who would make the decision to stand up or stay down? Who would make that call?

More shots were fired. “I said get up!”

You thought about your dad- what would he do? And so you were the one to make the call, the first student to crawl out slowly from under the table and rise, your hands held up to show that you were no threat. The rest of the students followed your lead. This was your team now- if one of them died, it was on you.

You looked at the shooter and you knew who he was- Timmy Rogers. He’d been in some of your classes in middle school and high school. He had always been quiet- the kind of kid who did well in class but never answered any questions. The person who put their share into a group project and didn’t complain about having to pick up the slack if someone else bailed. He was nice enough of a person that you wouldn’t have expected him to be holding a firearm in the middle of your school, but then again most unsubs could keep themselves hidden for years- that much you knew.

“Line up against the wall. Now!” he shouted.

You walked calmly to the wall while some of the other students scampered. One girl was crying. Another boy’s fists were twisted with fear. The librarian was on her knees, pleading with Timmy. “You’re a good boy. You always have been. Your mother-”

“Don’t talk about my mother! Don’t talk about me! You don’t know me!”

“Yes I do,” the librarian was crying. “I do know you and your mom wouldn’t have wanted-”

Timmy pulled the trigger and she was gone. He marched over and grabbed the girl who was crying, dragging her out in front for the rest of you to see. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry!” She fell to her knees. “Please, I’m sorry-”

You thought quickly about everything you knew about Timmy. He wasn’t an athlete by any means but he joined the wrestling team anyway, he liked art and his project last year was based on his parent’s divorce, his father was a marine, and his mom…

Oh. His mom had died in a car crash last week. She was hit by a drunk driver.

“You never cared about me!” he yelled. “Nobody cares about me. Nobody cared about her-”

“I did.” You didn’t know where the words came from- they were solid and bold and half a lie, but they made Timmy let go of the girl.

“And who are you?” He pointed the gun in your direction. You wanted to scream, but you didn’t.

“I’m (Y/N) Hotchner. W-we had art class together last year.” You hoped your stumble wasn’t too obvious.

“Yeah, and why does that matter? Why should I let you live? Why should I let any of you live?” He waved the gun around in the air, making some of the students shriek, but somehow you stayed calm even though you wanted to explode. 

“Y-your mom died in a car crash last week. But it wasn’t her fault. It was the other person who was driving drunk and it wasn’t fair that they got to live and she had to die,” you said.

“Why do you care?” He spat.

You reached deep down… really deep. “My mom died too. She was murdered by a serial killer. She deserved so much better, just like your mom did.”

Timmy paused, the gun in his hand was shaking but still pointed at you. From your view, you could see that through the glass there were officers moving into the school. No. Not just officers- they were wearing FBI vests. Help was almost there, you just had to stall.

“My parents got divorced too,” you said. “Your final project last year really spoke to me- your dad was away all the time and your mom got tired of it, even though they still loved each other.” That was a total lie- the guy was about as talented as Pollok, but you had to find something. “My parents were the same way.”

Now Timmy was crying. You could see behind him that agents were moving towards the library, but you were too focused on stalling Timmy that you weren’t focused on their faces.

“And I was at a boarding school when she died so I was alone- all alone, just like you, Timmy. My mom died and nobody was there to comfort me. My dad wasn’t with me, just like your dad isn’t here right now.”

He was so distracted by your words that he didn’t even notice that the library doors had opened behind him allowing Agent Morgan, Dr. Reid, and your dad to come in unnoticed.

“He- he didn’t even come for her funeral-” Timmy’s hand was getting weaker. He was crying harder. “I-I can’t reach him-”

“I know. I couldn’t reach my dad either since I was still in WISTEC. They couldn’t tell me anything about him until I got home. It’s not fair. I know it’s not fair. I care that it’s not fair.”

Timmy dropped the gun, crumbling to the ground in a fit of tears. Agent Morgan tackled him, pulling his hands behind his back while Dr. Reid disabled the firearm. Your dad ran straight to you, gripping you in a bone crushing hug and you sobbed into his chest.

He pulled you in tighter, stroking a hand down your hair. “It’s over, sweetheart,” he whispered. “I’ve got you. It’s over.”

“I worked the case, dad,” you managed to get out between your sobs. “I worked the case.”

[pitchprowler27]

Hearts On The Sidelines Part 4

“Sooo are you going to tell me why you look like shit or are we going to continue to pussy foot around it?” Bobby flopped down next to her. The two were hanging out at Ellie’s apartment after a rare day off. Ellie hadn’t been sleeping since she ran into Mitch. She can’t stop having nightmares about her time overseas. She can’t sleep for more then two hours at a time before she’s riddled with endless dreams - memories of her times trying to save everyone. Waking up in a pile of her own sweat, heart beating out of control and just lying in paralyzing fear. She would take running on empty if it meant not having to feel so out of control. 

“Can we just enjoy each others company without having to have a heart to heart?” Ellie tucked her legs up and covered herself with a blanket. Bobby is just staring at her blankly knowing that uncomfortable silence was Ellie’s Kryptonite. She stared back trying not to let the uneasiness take a hold of her like it usually does. “Come on Bob” She dragged out. She really didn’t want to talk about this. “How about we talk about how I got Leah’s number instead.” 

Bobby’s jaw drops to the ground when she says that. He gets a weird creepy smile on his face that can only mean trouble. “I’ll let you off the hook for now but yes tell me everything.” 

Ellie goes into great detail, well really the cliff notes version, of the nights events. She leaves out the part of running into Mitch and her emotional break down in front of her crush. Bobby is shocked that Ellie had such confidence. He too is happy that they had a soup sandwich week and she was able to capitalize on this. By the time Ellie was done telling her friend about everything that happened he was still wearing a shit eating grin. He grabbed Ellie by the shoulders and was shaking her back and forth. “I’m so proud of you!” 

“Alright alright alright that’s enough. Do I even wanna know how your night was the other night?” 

“Honey your little prude ears would fall off if I tell you the dirty things that man did to me. I’m still shitting out his juniors if you know what I mean.” He smirked over his cup of coffee knowing his words were going to gross Ellie out. 

It did because she slapped him on the chest “Ew Bobby you’re disgusting.” Before the two could continue their conversations Ellie’s phone buzzed signaling she got a texted message. Thankfully it was from the girl she had been thinking of. 

Leah: Hey pretty girl, any chance you want to get coffee Wednesday morning? 

Ellie had to stop herself from screaming but her face betrayed her, she was blushing. Even after Ellie was weird at the club Leah still wanted to see her. Karma was real.

Ellie: Yes! Just name a time and place. 

Leah: Roasted at 8?

Ellie groaned knowing that she worked Tuesday night until 7am but she would do anything to see the other girl again. Bobby looked over her shoulder and saw the message and grimaced for his friend. He knew that she wouldn’t say no to her. He just gave her shoulder a supportive squeeze.  

Ellie: Sounds like a date 

Ellie: I mean plan, sounds like a plan. 

Leah: Oh no pretty girl you got it right the first time.

Bobby let out a low whistle “Okay Eleanor who knew you had it in you.” Ellie grabbed a pillow and smacked him with it “I just hope you don't get fucked at work and you’re miserable like you usually are when you run on no sleep.” 

“I am not MISERABLE after working over nights.” 

“Ellie…babe…come on” Bobby again hit her with that dead stare that made Ellie agree that maybe she was a little miserable when she was tired or finishing an overnight shift. 

“Who knows maybe It wont be busy and it’ll be an easy OT shift. I’ll get a little sleep and be the perfect peach on this date.”

———————————————————————————————————————

She did not get any sleep, it was not an easy OT shift and Ellie felt dead on her feet. As she stared at herself in the locker room mirror she wondered if it was too late to cancel. It was already 730 and she already squeezed herself into jeans, it was indeed to late to cancel. Splashing some cold water on her face in hopes to wake herself up was a last ditch effort. Ellie has on a pair of simple blue jeans and a paramedic hoodie. Her hair is up in a bun that is somewhere between messy and put together. She didn’t look to bad but the bags under her eyes were very telling of how tired she was. 

She slaps herself on the face once, lets out a deep breath and grabs her keys. The drive over was only seven minutes but to Ellie it felt like the longest seven minutes of her life. She was exhausted and her body was betraying her excitement of seeing the blonde. Its been a few days since she seen Leah and she’s kind of craving seeing the other girl. Theres something about her that she can’t put her finger on quiet yet. She’s captivating. She has caught Ellie’s attention and she wants more of the older girl. 

She parks her car and heads over to Roasted. She takes one final deep breath before she opens the door to the cafe. Ellie’s tired eyes scan the small establishment and sees Leah sitting in the corner. Her tired legs drag her over to the other girl and if Ellie wasn’t so tired she’d be starstruck by how beautifully attractive Leah looked. She too was wearing some light colored jeans, a white t-shirt and an Arsenal letterman jacket. Her hair was down and looked effortless. She looked perfect. 

By the time Ellie made her way over to her Leah stood up to greet her. “Hey pretty girl, I’m happy you were able to meet me. I didn’t order anything yet I was waiting for you.” She gestured towards the counter signaling for Ellie to walk over. Ellie turned and then looked back at Leah waiting for her brain to catch up with what was just said. Leah is looking at her expectantly, the look making Ellie finally move. As she’s headed to the counter she feels Leah’s hand rest on the small of her back guiding her to the counter. The action immediately makes her get butterflies Something so simple shouldn’t make her heart race but it does. 

When they get to the counter Ellie orders an a quad shot of espresso over ice with milk. Leah raises her eyebrows in surprise but doesn’t say anything. Like the true gentlewoman she is Leah pays and they sit down with their coffee. As soon they are sitting Ellie’s anxiety immediately spikes. Reality of the situation has set in. Here she was on a date with the girl she’s been swooning over for a few weeks. Not just any girl but someone Ellie undoubtedly finds attractive. 

“Sooo…” Ellie is looking anywhere but Leah, and if she was she would see the amused look she’s wearing. One she often wears when she is with the smaller girl. 

“What’s the matter Ellie? You gone back to being my shy girl again?” She coyly asks the girl across from her. She smirks when she sees the heat rising in her cheeks. 

“I am not shy!” 

“I’m pretty sure if it wasn’t for all the Green Tea shots you had you wouldn’t have danced with me the other night.” 

“That’s not true either!” Ellie knows that it is 10000% true. She would’ve stayed clear from the other girl if it wasn’t for the liquor running through her veins. “Maybe its like 5% true.” 

That earns Ellie a laugh and she smiles in turn. She never thought she was unintentionally funny before. Everyone usually always comments on how shy and awkward she is. Excluding bobby no one thought she was known for being humorous.

“So tell me pretty girl how is it you save lives but can’t hold a conversation with little old me?” 

“That is so different” She just raises her eyebrow as if telling her to go on. “Saving someones life is predictable. Theres protocols, rules, structure that you can follow. Of course there’s the unknowns but there’s almost always an answer.” Ellie is flinging her hands around as she’s speaking not really paying attention. “You are the other hand are….so you.” 

Leah leans back in the chair lacing her fingers behind her back sizing Ellie up like she’s her next meal. If Ellie was speaking her truth it was fucking hot. The endless confidence just oozing from her was infuriating but went straight to her core. Ellie would not mind being Leah’s next meal. “Whats so bad about me pretty girl.” 

“You’re hot” Ellie blurts out and instantly is redder then Arsenal’s jerseys. She covers her face with her hands and mumbles out a “fuck”. In hindsight she should’ve known coming here right after working 12 hours with no sleep was a bad idea. She may still be awkward but her ability to filter out her words has been lost. “I mean, yes you are hot but. You’re you and I’m…” 

“Also hot?” She raises her eyebrow daring her to argue with her. “Don’t sell yourself short pretty girl. You are also not too hard on the eyes, but please, do continue saying how hot you think I am.” 

She once again flushes with heat in her cheeks. She knows inherently she isn’t doing anything wrong because Leah seems to enjoy the banter but she feels like she’s messing up. “You’re a world class football star and I’m just a paramedic” 

“Just?!” Leah leans forward instantly appalled that she would say such a thing. “Ellie you literally save lives I kick a football around for a living.” 

She waves her off not wanting the attention on her. They continue to go about their morning date without stress. Of course Ellie is awkward and rambles about silly facts or random thoughts. She may or may not have told the blonde in front of her she has nice hand veins. It wasn’t long until Ellie could feel the fatigue start to take its hold on her. The pressure she felt on top of her eyes and she was trying, but failing, at hiding all the yawns. Leah caught on very quickly and was eyeing her up. Realization dawned on her and she reached out grabbing one of Ellie’s hands. “Did you work last night?” 

She slowly blinked and thought about how to answer the question. “I mean some would say I was working last night yes.” 

“Ellie!” She admonishes. “Why didn’t you say anything! We didn’t have to do this today.” She was not impressed that the girl in front of her should be sleeping and not downing insane amounts of coffee to stay awake just to talk to her. 

“Because I wanted to see you.” Ellie was looking at her drink that sat on the table not wanting to see Leah’s reaction. 

“Pretty girl we could’ve done this anytime.” 

“Oh yes because our schedules are so flexible.” Again, it earns her a laugh from the blonde. “I also wanted you to kiss me..” She mumbles out that part almost hoping she doesn’t hear but Leah hears everything. A knowing smirk was painted across her face. 

“Come on I’ll walk you home, no way you can drive. Maybe if you’re lucky you’ll get a good night kiss.” 

On their walk back to Ellie’s apartment it was met with a sense of ease about them. Their fingers kept brushing against one another, Leah linked their fingers together like it was second nature. Ellie prays her hands don’t get clammy but she knows theres a high chance that they will. Leah shares fond memories of her childhood with Ellie who smiles and nods along. She isn’t as forth coming with personal information but the other doesn’t mind. When Leah walks her to the door Ellie is rocking back and forth on her heals. 

“Is there something you want to say pretty girl?” Leah asks looking down at Ellie. She damn well knows what Ellie wants but wants to hear her ask. 

“Leah…” 

“What can I do for you beautiful?” She tucks a strand of stray hair behind Ellie’s ear. She cups her cheek and her thumb gently rubs against it. “I can’t help if you don’t tell me what you want.” 

Ellie wants to roll her eyes but she can’t deny that its hot. Everything Leah does is attractive. She feels small under the blondes intense stare but can’t help but want more of her. “I want you to kiss me.” 

Leah starts to lean in slowly giving Ellie all the time in the world to back away. Her lips gently capture Ellie’s in a tender kiss. It sends shivers down her spine and heat to her core. She’s never been kissed like this. With such passion and tender care. Leah deepens the kiss not ready to part from the smaller girl. Her hand is still on her cheek and the other goes to her waist taking full control of the kiss. When they finally break apart Ellie is seeing stars staring at Leah like she hung them one by one in the sky. 

Leah has this soft tender look on her face with a hint of a smirk, “How was that?”

“Yep” Ellie is smiling and nodding her head. Not many thoughts going through her head. A mix between fatigue and dazzlement from the kiss. 

“A woman a few words Ellie girl and I couldn’t ‘ask for anything else.” She kisses her on the forehead and takes a few steps away from the door. “Get some sleep and text me when you wake up pretty girl.” She turns to walk away but thinks better of it, facing the younger girl again “Until next time pretty girl. Can’t wait to see what you beg for next.” 

[phthalomushroom]

The Family (4)

last next

pairings: modern!mafia!aemondxreader

summary: You had left Kings Landing and the Targaryen family four years ago. Now back and living with your old roommate you realize that the life you had thought you escaped had seemingly been waiting for you. But will the family really let you go? Will the people you left behind forgive you? Can you forget the past and look to the future?

warnings: language, mentions of trauma, stalking?

word count: 1.4K

note: I thought I had the rest of this planned out but my brain keeps finding new ways to change it on me. Next chapter though, we got some tea coming! Hope you enjoy!

You had felt like you were going to throw up.

Once you had left the party you had headed home and downed at least half a bottle of tequila. To say the hangover this morning was a difficult one was an understatement. You pulled yourself out of bed, grabbed your phone that you had discarded somewhere on the floor in your drunken haze and looked through the messages from Baela and Rhaena who were asking where you went.

It seems your drunk self was responsible enough to text back something that resembled that you had made it home.

You moved across the room, barely missing stepping on your shoes as you headed to the kitchen. You needed something to eat that you wouldn’t regurgitate right away. .

“There’s nothing to eat.”

You turned to see Baela lounging on the couch, a rag shielding her eyes from the light.

“We need to go to the grocery store.”

“No shit.” She sat up taking the rag from her face, she looked like she also got hit by a bus. “Glad you drank my tequila, if it was here when I got back I probably wouldn’t be alive right now.”

You frowned, joining her on the couch. “I take it you didn’t enjoy the party either.”

“I take it the talk with Aemond didn’t go well.”

“He was drunk and an asshole.”

She tilted her head. “Aemond doesn’t drink… he is an asshole though.”

“But he was never an asshole to me.”

She smirked. “Then I guess you’ve officially joined ‘Aemond’s an asshole club,’ I’ll get you one of our t-shirts-”

“Baela I’m being serious.”

“So am I, we meet every Tuesday to talk about the new assholey thing he’s done.”

You rolled your eyes, a headache starting to form. “I really thought that there might’ve been something left, but he’s changed since the last time I saw him.”

She shrugged. “He’s gone through a lot. Aegon’s death, Otto being locked up, and now you coming back. There’s been a lot of change happening.”

You rolled your eyes. “So because of all that he’s marrying Alys? I mean he couldn’t have picked someone with a little bit of, I don’t know, humanity?”

Baela chuckled. “I know this won’t be easy but things will get better, I promise. Besides, you’ve got your first encounter down which means you never have to talk to him again.”

“We live in the same city, I doubt I will never talk to him again.”

“Yeah but this time you don’t have to be so civil.”

You smirked, pride flaring in your chest a bit. “I was civil, wasn't I? 

Baela wrapped her arm around your shoulder. “I thought you were going to burn the place down, but you didn’t.”

You let out a long breath. “I need food and I need something to take my mind off all this shit.”

Baela smiled. “Shopping?”

You nodded in agreement. “Shopping.”

********

You and Baela had managed to stomach a little bit of breakfast at a cafe before making your way to the East side of the city. You decided on going to a well known store that was big for its unique couture.

You scavenged the racks trying to find some good purchases that matched your style. Baela had managed to find a few and had left you to go try them on in the fitting rooms. You had offered to go with her in case she wanted some feedback but had declined on the premise of not wanting to hog the fitting room.

You were currently looking through some sweaters when you heard an all too familiar voice.

“Well, look who's back in town.”

You stiffened, casting a glance over your shoulder to see Daemon Targaryen. He had his hands in his pockets and a sly smirk on his face.

“Daemon.” Was all you said before turning yourself back to the rack. You pushed yourself closer to the clothes, concealing your hand going into your bag to pull out your mace. You made sure to put it in your pocket so that it was easily accessible. 

“A cold greeting is not meant for family, sweetheart.” He moved around the rack so that he was in your line of sight. 

“We aren’t family.”

He sighed. “I have to say I was disappointed when I heard about the failed engagement. Aemy was so excited, nearly killed him to see you go.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat. “I thought the Targaryens no longer accepted you in the family, after your little coup with Rhaenyra.”

“A misunderstanding, Rhaenyra and I have been welcomed back. My lovely nephew saw to that.”

“Bullshit.”

“You’ve missed a lot since you left.”He leaned against the rack. “You shouldn’t have come back, (Y/N).”

You straightened. “I’m not involved in whatever shit you have going on. So leave me alone.”

He frowned. “I’m just reminding you that despite your disagreements with Aemond you are still seen as part of this family.”

You glared at him. “Aemond never told me anything about the family business. He never wanted me involved.”

“I was talking more in the literal sense.” He held his hands up. “I like you, (Y/N), which is why you should leave town.”

You raised a brow. “Are you threatening me?”

“No, I would never threaten you, I’m just giving you some advice. There are still bad people wandering around and I would hate for something bad to happen like last time.”

You crossed your arms. “That sure seems like a threat, Daemon.”

“If you don’t want to take my word for it, why don’t you ask the man who's been watching you since you and Baela left the cafe.”

You looked to where he gestured with his head to see the man in question. He wore a red baseball cap with a plain t-shirt and jeans and was staring very intently at a pair of tailored pants. 

He looked up briefly, catching your eye. He noted that you and Daemon were staring at him. He set the pants down and wandered towards the front of the store out of sight. 

“Who was that?” 

Daemon shrugged. “Ghosts of Aemond’s it seems, but I guess yours too since you shot their boss.”

You stared at him, unflinching. “That wasn’t me.”

He grinned, pointing a finger at you. “You are a good liar, I’ll give you that.”

Your hand drifted to your pocket with the pepper spray.

“Don’t worry too much,” Daemon said, taking a step back. “Aemonds gave his instructions in regards to you.”

“And what instructions are those?”

“Don’t let you die.”

You huffed a laugh, shaking your head in disbelief. “So he’ll assign a protection detail but he’ll treat me like a mistress.”

He took a step back. “I’ll be watching you, (y/n).”

“Creepy.”

He turned away, heading towards the front of the shop no doubt in hunt of the man in the red baseball cap.

“Was that Daemon?”

You jumped at Baela’s voice, nearly knocking down the rack of clothes you had spent too much time at. 

“Yeah,” you answered. “Just coming by to tell me he’s watching me.”

Baela shook her head “The family guard dog is back at it again.”

“Tell me about it.”

Baela had seemed to find some clothes she wanted to buy so you two headed to the registers. 

“Can I ask you something?” you asked before Baela could check out.

“Yeah?”

“Daemon mentioned that he was part of the family again. Is that true?”

“Yeah, I don’t know the specifics but about a year after you left Aemond had announced that he and Rhaenyra were no longer enemies of the family.”

You shook your head. “You’re kidding me, even after they killed Aegon?” 

Baela shrugged. “Jace said Aemond never does anything without a plan and I guess he needed them back in the family.”

You shook your head, watching as Baela put her clothes on the counter. It didn’t make sense, Aemond’s own brother being poisoned at the hands of those two. The Aemond you knew would never have sided with the people who murdered his big brother. Sure, Aegon and him had their differences and Aegon got on Aemond’s every nerve but he would never disrespect his brother like that.

And now you were being followed by some mystery guy and Daemon.

What the hell happened since you were gone?

Tag List: @dixie-elocin @liannafae @toodlesxcuddles @watercolorskyy @zenka69 @bellaisasleep @namelesslosers @tssf-imagines

[lillaydee]

One Heart Part 3

Sheriff Joel Miller / Reader

Trying and failing miserably to recover from an inconceivable loss, you accepted your best friend's invite to spend time with her and her family for a summer, hoping for a chance at a new beginning. Little did you know that the new beginning you were stepping into was a little too close to home.

WARNING:

Protective Joel (The Last of Us), Good Parent Joel (The Last of Us), Grief/Mourning, Joel is Bad at Feelings (The Last of Us), Joel Needs a Hug (The Last of Us), Ellie is mentioned, Sheriff Joel, Sarah plays matchmaker, No age gap, Joel is in his 30s, Joel is Trying His Best (The Last of Us), Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - No Cordyceps Outbreak (The Last of Us), Fluff and Angst.

SERIES MASTER LIST

PART 2

---

“She doesn’t speak?”

“Nope. She understands you, responds, nods, shakes her head, does things when asked, but she doesn’t speak. And if what you’re telling me is real, I mean… wow!”

“But… did she get checked out?”

“That little girl had been in and out of the hospital since she was born, of course she got checked out. For a while, people just thought she developed slower, you know, because of her… condition, but then she got better, and she still didn’t speak. And you are telling me she was speaking in almost complete sentences, so… yeah… shocking. I’m surprised Jenny didn’t hire a blimp telling the whole town!”

“What condition?”

She contemplated telling you, taking a deep breath, but decided against it. “Maybe you ask Joel about that, okay? Not my place. Not a fond memory to think of either… so…”

You wanted to ask more. You needed to know more. But the idea of asking Grumpy Ol’ Purdy Sheriff Miller (whom, incidentally, you totally flashed yesterday, not that it factored in your decision-making process when it came to him AT ALL) about anything, much less something as private as his daughter’s illness just turned your insides into icicles. You really wanted to know, though. You connected with this little girl, and before you had Ellie, you were one of those women whose idea to calm a crying baby was to pat their head with one finger and say ‘there, there’. You thought having Ellie would have changed that, but even when she was around, you had never warmed up to other people’s children.

So, why Sarah? Was it because she was Ellie’s age? That some of her demeanours reminded you of Ellie? Why though? Because she stepped on your foot and hugged your leg? Because she played with your hair?  Many children do that, you’re sure of it.

You really didn’t know.

‘You sure about that? Nothing to do with the fact that her Sherrif father is the hottest man you had ever seen in your life?’

What? No! Of course not. Shut up!

Yeah… definitely had nothing to do with it.

‘You did flash him, though. And even though he was the perfect gentleman about it, you were sure he fidgeted a bit too much after.’

Oh, shut up, you noisy, nosy, overthinking, sex starved brain.

---

You woke up early on Tuesday. 2 am early. Three days here and with the exception of that first night, you had slept well, despite the unease you had going on. You got dressed, got your bike out, ready to head to the market at the edge of town, the moon shining brightly, enough for you to see the area. You liked this. You had been cycling everywhere since you got here. Your body hurt like crazy, but you felt… limber, despite the stiffness in your muscles. Free. The air felt clean, the town felt safe, even with the obviously problematic kitchen window that Sarah had climbed into, you just felt as if nothing bad could happen to you.

“Where you off to, Lady?”

FUCKING HELL!!!

You jumped off your bike, convinced your skin remained on it, ready to kung fu your way out of whoever the fuck it was that just interrupted your blissful, romantic early morning fantasies about this town, scaring the living shit out of you.

Joel was sitting on Jenny’s kitchen steps, still in his uniform, a lit cigarette in his hand.

Shit.

“Your pass down your ability to sneak up on people to Sarah, or something? I swear one of these days I’m gonna have a heart attack and one of you will be responsible for it. Mark my words.”

He chuckled, standing up, walking the few steps it took to get to you.

“What are you doing out here? It’s 2.15 in the morning.”

“I just got home, needed a smoke, didn’t want to smoke where Sarah might see.”

“Didn’t know you smoked.”

“I don’t, usually, a bad vice from my younger days. I just… needed one today.”

“You just got home? You were out in town earlier than I was.”

“Had to help out on a case from out of town. Usual business. So, where are you off to? Bit too early for a bike ride, isn’t it?”

“The market. Had to help Maria with the shopping. I start in her kitchen today.”

He looked at your bike, now flat on its side on the ground, before stubbing his cigarette out, fishing his keys out of his pocket.

“Let me drive you.”

“No, no… it’s okay. I need the exercise. I like it. Helps me think. It’s not exactly far. Plus, you just got in, you should go get some sleep.” You picked up your bike and began wheeling it off.

He didn’t move, hesitantly fiddling with his keys.

“Go get some sleep, Joel. You look like shit.” Yeah, right, as if that’s possible. “I’ll be fine. You know its safe. Didn’t you work all day to keep it safe here? Good night, Joel.”

And you pedalled out of there, the light from your handlebar lighting the way. When you looked back as you were leaving the gate, he was still standing there.

Holy Shit.

You just had a full conversation with Joel, and neither of you yelled. Well, you did, when you thought he was a ghost, but that’s not the point. But the two of you were civil to one another. That’s great, right? Good job. Good job. See? You’re doing better. You’ll be fine. One day at a time.

When you arrived home two hours later, you thought you saw the curtain from one of the upstairs windows of Jenny’s house moved as you shut your front door. You needed to get some sleep before lunch prep.

---

There was a loud banging coming from your front door. Someone was aggressively knocking over and over and over. You glanced at the clock, it’s 730am.

God, no. Not again.

“Lynn!!! It’s Jenny. Are you home?”

You jumped up and immediately opened the door. A harassed looking Jenny standing there, Sarah and Jello in her arm.

“So sorry to do this, Lynn, but Omera is out sending Winta to school. Can you watch her for a bit? The horses got out. Joel is there helping. I have to go help them. Please?”

“Yeah, of course,” you said, taking the little girl into your arms. “Be careful!” you shouted after her, she just waved her hand in the air, sprinting towards the farm, far too agile for someone her age. You looked at Sarah, the little girl looking way too excited to be in your care. “You hungry?” She nodded. You set her down and opened your fridge.

“What would you like for breakfast?” you asked, scanning the contents of your fridge, which was abysmally bare.

“Egg Furries,” she said confidently.

Excuse you? “Egg Furries?”

Excited nod.

“What is Egg Furries?”

“Egg and Furries.”

Huh. Okay. Google is your best friend, right? You got your phone and typed in “Furries”.

A bunch of people dressed in furry animal costumes appeared.

Okay. Not helping. Call Maria.

“What are Furries?”

“Huh?”

“Your niece just told me she wanted Egg Furries for breakfast. What is that?”

“Well, it’s not like she’s ever spoken to me or made requests for breakfast, Lynn. She said Egg Furries?”

“Yeah, and I googled it, and all I got was pictures of some convention where full grown adults are walking around in furry animal costumes. I doubt that’s what she had in mind.”

Maria cackled. “My best guess, it’s Egg Fried Rice, she loves them,” she said. She was quiet for a while, before a snorting sound filled your ears and she was suddenly howling with laughter. “Egg Furries, oh my God that is gold!!!” she said between laughter. You can practically hear her wipe tears off her face. You heard Tommy ask her what happened. She told him. And you stood there, patiently listening to them laugh for what felt like five whole minutes. When Maria spoke again, she sounded emotional. “Sorry,” she said, voice slightly cracked. “Never thought we’d be laughing about something Sarah said, you know? You must be one special lady. She still hadn’t said a word to Joel or Jennie, let alone anyone else.”

You looked at the little girl, who was now busy studying your purple folded bike, flicking the lights on and off, completely entranced by it, your ratty, scratched up old silver helmet wobbling on her tiny head, Jello sat on the seat. There was suddenly a warmth in your chest.

“Yeah, well, I’m on babysitting duty for a bit, and she’s hungry. Anything she’s allergic to?”

“No, but if you’re making her fried rice, go easy on the salt. She shouldn’t be having too much of it. Nothing artificial or fatty, so no bacon or pancetta. No red meat. And no artificial anything, and go easy on the sugar, unless you want Joel to shoot you dead.” You heard Tommy complain about Joel in the background, Maria shushing him. “Just give her the Furries and some fruits, you’ll be fine,” she said, before her and Tommy started laughing again. “Furries, I tell ya…” She went quiet for a bit, “Hey, you mind if I come over and hang out with you guys a bit before work? Would love to hear her talk to you if she does… I’ve… I’ve never heard her speaking voice, you know? Tommy too?”

“Sure. We’ll be having Egg Furries for breakfast.”

She told you she’ll be over in maybe half an hour and hung up, still howling with laughter.

Sarah was eating her fried rice, pretending to feed some to Jello, when Maria and Tommy arrived. She was excited to see her aunt and uncle, but too busy eating to get up. The three of you chit chatted for a bit, Tommy sitting on the window seat with his breakfast.

“Lady?”

“Yeah, sweetie?”

“Can I want one more?”

“Of course! You want some more juice with that?”

Excited nod.

You got her bowl and glass and went to refill them. As you were putting the freshly squeezed orange juice back in the fridge, you were suddenly struck by how quiet the house was.

Tommy was holding Sarah close in his arms, hugging her for dear life. Maria was speechless. She smiled a teary smile at you, mouthing ‘thank you’.

You kept forgetting that Sarah had never talked to anyone.

Tommy set her back down on her chair when you placed her refilled breakfast on the counter. He gave you a bear hug, saying thank you over and over again. You waved his thanks away, asking him if he wanted coffee. He just laughed softly, telling you he’ll get it himself.

Someone knocked on the open door. It was Joel, looking tired as hell, looking for Sarah.

“Morning brother,” Tommy said. “Coffee? Orange Juice? Egg Furries?”

Joel looked perplexed for a moment, before his eyed landed on Sarah, who was busy enjoying her second helping of Egg Fried Rice and orange juice. His perplexed look disappeared, immediately.

“Who cooked the Fried Rice?”

“I did,” you said. “Why?”

“Can I talk to you outside? Alone?”

Okkkay…

When you got outside, Joel was not facing you, his fists clenched on his sides.

“Who told you to cook for my daughter?”

“What do you mean? She was hungry, she hadn’t had breakfast.”

He turned to face you. His face the epitome of anger. “You think you know what’s best for my daughter just because she speaks to you? Hmm? How much salt did you use? Was that orange juice freshly squeezed?”

“Yes, Joel, the orange juice is freshly squeezed. I didn’t use much salt at all, the MSG already gave the fried rice…”

“You used MSG when cooking for my daughter?” he raised his voice. So loud. So, so loud. So loud, Jenny came flying out of her kitchen door. Maria came outside, asking what was going on.

“What is going on, Maria, is that your friend here, used MSG when cooking for my daughter. Are you trying to poison her?” he advanced on you, and you shrunk back. “Did you even bother to check her dietary requirements before making anything for her? I know you were some big shot chef back where you came from, but here, in my home, when you are cooking for MY daughter, I decide what she can and cannot eat, do you understand me?”

Jenny and Maria were speaking all at once, trying to calm him down, Maria trying to explain, but it seemed like he was having none of it. His face was red, his body stiff. Tommy flew outside, trying to calm him down as well, but Joel was focused on you, the lady who obviously had nothing but ill intentions towards his daughter. Gone was the Joel who apologized to you, who offered you coffee and a ride, this hostile looking, enraged man was all that was left.

“Daddy.”

The chaos shut down immediately. Sarah was on your porch, looking at Joel as if she was about to cry.

“No, Daddy. Don’t yell at Lady.”

Joel looked as if he just woke up from a bad dream. The stiffness and anger melted away from his body. He went over to Sarah, picked her up, and asked her, “What did you call me?”

“Daddy.”

Joel broke down, hugging Sarah tight, his whole body shaking from wrecked sobs. She put her tiny hand on his head.

“No Daddy, don’t cry.”

Joel lifted his face for her to see, and she pulled his lips sideways.

“Smile Daddy. Don’t cry.”

He gave a weak laugh, tears still pouring down his face. Tommy, Maria and Jenny watching, looking as if their greatest wishes had just come true.

“I’m sorry BabyGirl. Daddy was just happy to hear you speak to me.”

“It’s okay… but you say sorry to Lady okay? Don’t yell at her anymore, okay?”

Joel looked at you. Guilt filling his features.

You didn’t look at him. You went inside, shutting the door behind you.

---

Maria glared daggers at Joel. She and Jenny went into the big house, waiting for Joel to come in. When he did, Jenny took Sarah from him, telling her its time for her bath.

“What the hell was that?” Maria asked, her arms crossed on her chest.

“Look, you don’t know what she put in there, okay? She’s never cooked for Sarah before, she doesn’t know her medical history.”

“And yelling at her, humiliating her, accusing her of trying to poison your child was the way to handle that?”

“She told me she put MSG in the food!!!”

“Oh my God, Joel. She’s a professional chef, she’s a mother. She makes her own MSG; she didn’t use store bought processed ones. Just because it’s MSG, doesn’t mean it’s bad for you.”

“You can do that?”

“Yeah… Joel… you can make your own MSG. She used Shitake Mushroom. Heck, even I make my own MSG. And I have been using them when I cook for all of you.” Maria was beyond exasperated. “And, for the record, she did ask me if Sarah was allergic to anything. She’s not dumb, Joel. The woman makes her living cooking for people. You think she wouldn’t have thought of that?” She was starting to calm down, seeing Joel looking sheepish and regretful.

“Look, Joel, I get you are protective of Sarah, but she’s okay now. Did you forget? She’s not sick anymore, Joel. Let her live a little. She doesn’t have to live by the old standards anymore. And please, please, for your own sake, and especially for Sarah’s, please do not go around screaming at people who were more than willing to look after your kid at a moment’s notice. Specifically, people who she likes, like Lynn, who was only making sure your daughter didn’t go hungry this morning.”

Maria got out of there, crossing over to go to yours.

Tommy leaned on to the kitchen counter, his older brother looking so ashamed of himself, he couldn’t help but pity the guy, although he was definitely glad he was not on the receiving end of Maria’s wrath. He cleared his throat, bracing himself for the outcome of what he was about to say.

“You know, that lady has been here three days, and today, I heard my sweet niece speak for the first time ever. She called you Daddy, Joel. How long have you been waiting to hear her say that word? I get you want to protect Sarah, but maybe, just maybe, Lynn being here is good for your daughter, brother. Try not to scare her away, okay?”

Joel kept quiet. He had nothing. He knew he was more than guilty.

“Talk to her, apologize, tell her the whole situation. She’ll understand. I mean, I don’t know her well, but she’s been Maria’s friend since infancy, you know. I doubt Maria would have stayed friends with her all these years if she was a bad person. And… to be frank, she has history of her own, you know. You screaming at her, accusing her of trying to poison your daughter… that’s not helping. That was mean, brother. Apologize, please. I mean it.”

He made to leave, but continued, “And… you didn’t hear this from me, but hurting little girls? That’s a massively sore spot, brother. So… again, apologize. Grovel. Soon.” He patted Joel on the shoulder and left for work.

Joel heard the door to your house open. He hid himself, peeking out from the kitchen window. You and Maria were leaving for the restaurant. He knew for a fact that it was too early for you to leave for the lunch service. Your face swollen from crying. His heart sank. He felt like the biggest douche bag that ever lived.

You left early because of what he did.

He kept hearing Sarah’s sweet voice, the one he had only heard for the first time two days ago, calling him Daddy, telling him to say sorry to Lady. Even a three-year-old knew he crossed the line. What a dickhead, Joel.

He had to talk to you. Tonight. Make it up to you. Apologize to you.

That’s what he’ll do.

---

PART 4

[munsons-melody]

sick day

summary: eddie cuts class to come help you get over your cold

pairing: eddie munson x female!reader

cw: none + established relationship

word count: 1.5 k

a/n: i thought this was a v cute concept

masterslist

i do not consent to having any of my works republished, translated, or posted to any other site except here. if you see my works anywhere but tumblr, it has been republished without my knowledge, consent, or permission.

—

you were undeniably, undoubtedly sick.

what started out as a sniffle from the day before turned into a full-blown-out nasty cold. you could only blame the weather for the illness.

it was a gloomy tuesday morning, and upon hearing your groggy voice and horrific cough in the morning, your mother sent you straight back to bed and called the school to tell them you weren't coming in.

you ended up falling back asleep for a handful of hours, trying to avoid the torture of being awake with a headache, a sore throat, and uncontrollable coughing. however you were soon woken up by your phone ringing.

"hello?" you sleepily croaked out, your voice hoarse from the amount of coughing you had succumbed to

"hey y/n, why aren't you in class?" you heard eddie ask, the sounds of people talking behind him. he was using the school phone to call you.

"i'm dying," you told him, sniffling a little bit. "what?" he asked in confusion

"i got the worst cold ever and i'm dying" you said again, feeling a cough coming on

"oh shit, how are you feeling?" he asked and you rolled your eyes

"actually I'm doing great thanks," you responded sarcastically

"sorry, that was a stupid question" he said. you heard the bell ring in the background and some shuffling noises

"i gotta go babe but i love you, feel better" he told you, making you smile. "i love you too" you said as you heard a click and the dial tone ring out.

you coughed a couple more times, causing your throat to burn with pain. you groggily pushed yourself up from your laying position and sat on the edge of your bed

you caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and your looks had mirrored how you felt; like shit

your nose was bright pink from the countless times you had to blow your nose, cheeks were flushed, hair was in the messiest braid ever, your dark circles engulfed your eyes from the lack of sleep you got the previous night. you were wearing a giant shirt with garfield on it, some baggy pj pants, and you knew if anyone were to see how you did now, they would be disgusted

you went and used the bathroom, then went to the kitchen to search for something to eat that wouldn't make you more nauseous but failed to do so 

the house was quiet, the only thing you could really hear was the birds chirping and cars passing outside. you stood there, enjoying the silence, sipping on your water

you headed back to your room in attempts to fall asleep again, but after tossing and turning for a good 10 minutes, you sat up with a huff

just as you resigned yourself to the rest of the day filled with solitude and sniffles, a knock echoed through the house. startled, you slowly made your way to the front door, your stuffy nose adding an extra layer of annoyance to your condition.

you looked through the peephole to see eddie standing there with a large brown bag in hand. he looked so good wearing his black sabbath t shirt and ripped black jeans, his white reeboks giving a pop of white.

you slowly opened the door, only leaving a little bit of it open to avoid him from fully seeing you. it’s not like you always wore tons of makeup, just enough to boost your confidence, and eddie had seen you completely without makeup only a handful of times, but you didn’t want him to see the horrific sight which was you with the worst cold

"eddie, what are you doing here?" you asked with a raspy voice

eddie flashed his trademark grin, holding up the bag in his hand. "since you're sick, i thought i could be of some assistance. i brought you some homemade chicken soup. wayne swears on it" he said sweetly

"thank you baby that's so sweet," you said with a smile, before furrowing your brows

“wait where did you get homemade chicken soup?” you asked and he blinked

“oh well technically it’s campbells… but it works just the same, i swear, scouts honor” he smiled, lifting three fingers

he started to walk in but you shut the door more

"i don't want to get you sick" you told him and he shook his head 

"i have the immune system of an ostrich!" he declared and you let out a giggle which turned into a nasty cough 

"oh baby," he said sympathetically, standing up the next stair to the doorway 

"c'mon let me take care of you please, just until your parents get home?" he asked with the sweetest tone

"eds i have to be honest, i look absolutely disgusting right now, i don't want you seeing me like this" your voice faded into a whisper

"y/n, i can promise you that nothing you do or have will make me less attracted to you, i love you in every conceivable way now can i please just come in and heat your soup up for you?” he begged, giving you puppy dog eyes

you slowly opened the door, revealing your sick state to eddie and he smiled, walking in to your house and immediately giving you a kiss on the forehead

“jesus you’re burning up” he said taken aback and you rolled your eyes

“no shit sherlock” you huffed as he walked into your kitchen

“well i guess the first symptom of this cold is hate” he joked with a smile and you shook your head at him, shutting the door

“so how come you were able to come here in the middle of the school day?” you questioned, leaning against the kitchen counter as he poured your soup from the can into a pot

“i just went to the nurses and told them i was feeling sick and apparently there’s something going around the school so they believed me and sent me home” eddie shrugged, turning up the heat on the stove

“so that’s what i got” you said, crossing your arms

“maybe” eddie said, eyes staying on the soup to make sure it didn’t boil over

“wait what did you mean you have the immune system of an ostrich?” you asked, realizing what he said earlier

“yeah they have one of the best immune systems, it’s a fact” he said nonchalantly and you laughed

“and how do you know what?” you asked as he turned off the stove

“well when i was growing up, wayne had the day shift and after school i’d go to the library to read before he’d come and pick me up, i learned it from some nature book” eddie smiled, and handed you the steaming hot bowl of soup

“thank you” you said, your stomach suddenly making countless noises and rumbling, since you hadn’t ate anything all day

you sat at your kitchen table and ate your soup, and eddie munched on a couple saltines you had from your cupboard

“yeah and luckily i had a test i didn’t study for at all for 7th period so i get more time to study” eddie said and you nodded, not really caring in that moment if you secretly knew you had to help him study because you were so hungry, the soup vanishing in front of you

“mhm” you mutter out, finishing the rest of the soup and chugging some water

“feel better?” eddie asked and you nodded. honestly you did. now that your stomach had shut up and power of chicken noddle soup was finally coming to fruition, you felt the tiredness loom back over you

you yawned and stretched your arms out and eddie could see the sudden drop in the little bit of energy you had earlier

“now back to bed young lady” he said in a not so stern voice and you listened, getting up with your bowl in hand and placing it in the sink

eddie followed you into your room and shut the door. you put some of the tissues that were discarded on the floor and put them in the trash, and then instantly cuddled into your sheets, pulling them around you

eddie took off his jacket and shoes, walking over to the other side of the bed

“ed’s what are you doing? i told you i don’t want you to get sick” you said, and he just smiled, taking off his pants and then crawling into the empty space next to you

“i don’t care sweetheart, all i care about is you feeling better and i know that you’ll sleep better with me here, it’s a fact” he said, pulling you in close

“oh really? did you learn that in your nature book as well?” you asked with a slight laugh and he kissed your head

“no, i just know you that well” he said, letting you lean your head against him

you felt the sleepiness wash over you like a wave on a beach, and you just let your eyes close, feeling eddie’s chest move against your back

you were a little jealous he could breathe through his nose without the annoyance of it being stuffy but you didn’t care because he was right, you do sleep better with him near

fin.

[strstab]

𝐬𝐭𝐮𝐟𝐟𝐲 𝐬𝐚𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐝𝐚𝐲𝐬 - 𝐣.𝐦

summary ; kie’s fever got to you so jj helps you feel better

pairing ; jjaprilbank x fem!reader

notes ; sick readerrr, bath w jj, besitosssss, body lovin, cuddling, our beloved sock, & tinkerbell 🧚

a/n ; so this was actually meant to be out earlier this morning but then got caught up in a family function.. so sorry abt that. ALSO. i was going to post something tuesday but instead of posting it i accidentally deleted it… so shopping w the girls probably won’t happen 😭

after a sleep over at kie’s last weekend, you’ve felt yourself feeling more like shit by the day. on wednesday you were coughing up a storm and now you couldn’t feel your throat or stop sneezing.

you called off of work right after another restless night. jj was at john b’s and kie was the reason you were sick so you couldn’t hang out with her. you were on your third tinkerbell movie with a pile of tissues next to you.

you tried sleeping the sickness away during the day but even with the large amount drowsiness that was killing you slowly, you kept waking up with the same sore throat that wouldn’t seem to disappear. it had been like that since you were feeling symptoms so now you’ve been sleeping like 4 hours a night. or day.

you blew your nose into the tissue and then threw it into the pile. you felt soft fur rub against your neck which meant your cat had joined you in bed.

“sock, please help me. don’t you have powers to make your dear old mom feel better?” you whined just for your cat to give you a blank stare. you huffed and sat up, stretching your arms. you hadn’t gone up to do anything since the second movie started.

you dragged your feet all the way to the kitchen, grabbing a banana off the counter and peeling it open. you took a big bite as you searched the fridge for something else to munch on. there wasn’t much in it. the last person who did groceries was jj. the only things he usually brought home were beer, hot pockets, cookies, an 8th of weed (which he definitely picked it up from his dealer on aisle 10), and cat food. all of which only lasted a week in your house.

you found a cup of strawberry yogurt and decided to diy your brunch. you grabbed a bowl and poured the yogurt into it, then cutting up the banana you got from the counter and placing the bits into the bowl. ‘what a chef i am’ you thought.

you ate your ‘meal’ over the counter while scrolling through instagram. you were watching an interview from a netflix show when you felt strong arms wrap themselves around your waist, pulling you into their hold. you squealed and looked above to see blonde hair making it’s way to your neck.

wet kisses were placed all over your soft spot. “baby, i’m sickk” you whined pulling away from him.

“i know. and?” he pulled you back, this time holding you tighter.

“i don’t wanna get you sick,” you sniffle and he shrugs. guess getting sick wasn’t a big deal for him. but to be honest, he’s always had a strong immune system.

you were conversing about each other’s day, yours sounding quite boring. he was ranting about how john b wouldn’t let him redecorate the cats ass and how pope smacked the shit out of him while waxing his board.

your responses were short. your throat hurt too much to be talking a lot, so did your stomach to be honest. everything ached. you hopped up from your seat on top of the counter and went to get a bottle of pills. jj watched as you took two pills in your hand and swallowed them with a small cup of water. “what hurts mama?”

“more like what doesn’t hurt.” you sarcastically answered. he stared at you for a minute before smiling and picking you up bridal style. “jj what the hell?!”

your feet were kicking air and your arms wrapped themselves around jj’s shoulders, holding on for dear life. his hand was supporting your back as he made his way to your bedroom.

he placed a kiss on your lips and sat you on the edge of the bed. “did you get any sleep last night?” he asked rubbing the eye bags that were forming below.

you shook your head as he peeped the pile of tissues that sat next to your laptop. “stay right here i’ll be back okay?”

“i mean.. where else would i go” you grumbled as he ran off to the bathroom.

you sat there on your phone, continuously sniffling while he did his thing in the bathroom. quickly after, he ran back out to you and picked you up swiftly, dropping your phone on your bed.

you laughed out loud (lol😜😜😜) as he brought you to the sink in your candle lit bathroom. he stripped you of your clothes, eyes taking in your body that was perfect in every way.

you felt your face heat up when you noticed him, arms quickly trying to cover yourself. “stop staring.”

he chuckled and kissed your lips softly. “just appreciating what’s mine, princess,” he murmured.

you let out a sound of annoyance. “c’mon baby, you know you’re prefect.” he picked you up and placed you in the tub. your muscles immediately relaxed as the heated water touched your skin.

“too hot? cold?”

“‘s perfect, j.” you smiled at his thoughtfulness. he really didn’t have to do this, but it made you happy knowing he cared enough to do so.

everything about the room right now was just calming.

you inhaled the steam and aroma from the cookie scented candle that followed it. as jj massaged your back with soap you let out a hum of pleasure. he peppered kisses on your shoulder and upper back while you relaxed in the water. “mmm, i could fall asleep right now,”

“yeah? seeing how tired you’ve been it seems like you could fall asleep anywhere.”

after your bath you guys cuddled up in bed. his request obv. you protested because you didn’t wanna get him sick but he still didn’t care. he went on a rant while drying you up about how all he wanted to do was be close to you.

so now, you laid head on his chest as his fingers were tangled in your hair. there was still a pinch of guilt in you for having him this close knowing you could get him sick but you couldn’t deny the fact that this felt amazing.

tinkerbell played on the tv instead of the laptop but you weren’t even watching either way. your eyes were half lidded as sleep tried taking you over. you tried fighting it, wanting to appreciate the time you were spending with your boyfriend, but it was winning by a lot.

even though all you were doing was watching a movie in comforting silence, it still meant something to you. so, you wanted to be up for it.

he moved his hand to the side of your thigh and rubbed his thumb against it. “you’re falling asleep on me, love.”

there was no response from you but your eyes were still half open. he patted your side and you perked up. “sorry, what’d you say?”

you felt jj’s chest abruptly shake as he giggled above so you got up fully to look at him. “what’s funny?”

“nothing. just how cute you look half asleep.” he smiled and pushed your head back down to his chest. “jus get rest babe. you need it.”

you buried your face in his hoodie and dozed off while his thumb caressed you softly. maybe all you need was your boyfriend with you to get the rest of a lifetime.

yeah yeahhhh ooohhhhaahahshiegsksba

hey yall. hope u enjoyed thatttt. so if you read my a/n you’d know this was meant to be up earlier this day. (april 1st) but i got caught up in a family reunion kinda thing so yeah..

also i had shopping with the girls (cleo, kie and sarah) in my drafts but i accidentally deleted it bc my fingers tend to touch before reading what it’s going to touch… so yeah that’s gone. -(edit) i tried editing my notes and ALMOST deleted this post too…

y’all know my requests are always open so feel free to request!! or just talk to meee. entertain me guys i’ve been bored

but anyways… i’m cuddling with my cat so i’ll catch you guys laterrrr.

[nolita-fairytale]

make my heart surrender | carmen berzatto x fem!reader | chapter seven: tuesday, again

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader

warnings: lots of swearing, tooth-rotting fluff, use of she/her pronouns, friends to lovers, references to sex, no use of y/n, second person pov, happy ending

word count: 3.8k

summary: you left your heart in chicago, so the only logical conclusion you've come to, is that you have to go back.

a/n: ok this author's note may be a long one. WOW. can i just say 'wow' holy shit?! i wrote this story in a week because inspiration struck and i couldn't get these characters, or this story, out of my freaking head. i am beyond grateful to any and all that read, liked, reblogged, or commented. thank you for being cheerleaders for me, carmy, and this story. i am truly so in love with these characters it hurts, so thank you for encouraging me to continue this love affair.

that being said, i am not done with these two at all. i have a few companion pieces i'm working on right now: a playlist, a headcanon, and maybe even a oneshot (or a few but who's counting)? thank you again for reading. please enjoy.

read: part six | masterlist

Tuesday, again. 

It’s Tuesday again and your time in Chicago has come to an end. Carmy had stayed the night with you at your airbnb. But morning came, and he left early to start his morning at the restaurant. Truthfully, he just hadn’t wanted to watch you pack – couldn’t get out of there fast enough when you’d opened your suitcase. You noticed how much it bothered him, letting him know that you’d stop by the restaurant before heading to the airport. 

And that was that. You’d gone your separate ways before, and you’d go your separate ways again – just for a little bit. And it wouldn't be like last the last time. It’s bittersweet – leaving today – but you keep reminding yourself of the conversation you’d had yesterday about the future of your relationship. You wanted to be with him, and Carmy wanted to be with you. The rest, you’d figure out as you go.

Your boyfriend.

It felt strange – even if he’d basically already been your unofficial platonic boyfriend back in New York. Adding a title to it was a whole other ball game. 

New. 

Never did you think, as you were preparing for this trip, that you’d return back home with Carmy as yours. You thought maybe you’d talk about what happened -- smooth things over -- but that would be that, and you’d go back to being friends. After this week, you were starting to believe you were never supposed to be just friends. 

You had a feeling none of your friends would be surprised when you shared the news – not in the least. 

You finish packing up your things, double checking that you haven’t left anything behind before heading to the restaurant. It’s about thirty minutes to lunch service, and since they’re not open just yet, you enter through the back door one last time for what feels like could be a while. 

And there it is again: that bittersweet feeling. 

“Chef!” Tina says, her eyes lighting up as she sees you. “You headin’ out today?”

“Hey, T,” you reply. “Yeah, I’m heading to the airport after this. Just wanted to stop by before I go.”

“Well you better come back soon,” she says almost as if it’s a threat, and you laugh in response. 

“Of course.”

“There she is!” Marcus hollers across the kitchen, as soon as he spots you. “Damn. What am I gonna do with you?”

“Uh… keep doin’ what you’re doing and kill it?” you reply, eliciting a proud smile from him. 

“Seriously. This last week… I’ve learned so much from you. Thank you,” he says, his gratitude evident in his voice. 

“No, thank you, Marcus,” you answer, genuinely. “I haven’t felt this inspired in… well a while. I want to be kept up on all your new flavor pairings. Just remember. I’m only a text away.”

“Yes, chef,” he replies, moving in to give you a hug. 

He wraps his arms around you and you hug him back. Boy, is it bittersweet. How, in one week, have you gotten so attached?

“Hey! I want in!” another voice chimes in, as you and Marcus’ hug comes to an end. 

“Syd!”

You smile, greeting Sydney with a hug – a hello goodbye kind of hug.

“You better come visit me in New York,” you insist. You’re not sure how long you’ll be there, but you say it anyways, just in case it’s a while. 

You watch as Sydney and Marcus exchange glaces. 

“What?”

“Nothin’, chef,” Marcus answers, almost too quickly. 

Sydney shrugs, “I don’t know. Just uh, wondering how long you’ll be there for.” She’s prodding and she knows it. You decide not to ask what she means by it.

“Well, if it ends up being longer… than I expect, you better come up,” you clarify. 

“Okay, yes. I definitely will,” Sydney agrees with a nod, before pulling you in for one more hug. 

“Hey, cousin said you’re headin’ out so Ebra’s made you a sandwich for the trip, babe. We’ll see ya around soon,” Richie greets, interrupting your moment with Sydney and Marcus. 

Richie, whose affection seems to catch you off guard, slings an arm around you, handing you the sandwich that Ebraheim has so kindly wrapped up for you. 

“Cousin!” Richie shouts, in search of Carmy. 

“Jesus Christ, it’s ten in the morning. Are we already starting the yelling this early or-?” Carmy calls back to him. He bursts through the doors from where he’s been fixing something up in the front of house dining area. He stops as soon as he sees you. 

“Hey.”

“Hey yourself,” you reply, taking in the image of his unruly curls, white t-shirt, and blue apron you've gotten so used to over the last few days.

It’s almost as if everyone else but Richie tries to make themselves as busy as possible – to give you two a chance to say goodbye. You can hear Marcus and Sydney making themselves scarce as Angel and Manny turn the sink water back on. 

“I just uh-, wanted to stop by before heading to the airport,” you say, unsure of just how much everyone else knows about you and Carmy’s current relationship. “Say goodbye to everyone.”

It’s clear that they know something’s up, but you still have your reservations about kissing him in front of everyone. 

“What do you mean?" Richie asks, glaring at Carmy. "This asshat’s not takin’ you to the airport?”

Richies practically shouting for the entire kitchen to hear, causing you and Carmy both to take a breath. You exchange a ‘here we go again’ look as Richie continues on.

“What kind of-, I swear to god, cousin-.”

“Richie!” you hear Tina snap, looking up from her prep station. “Shut the fuck up and give them a minute, you old bitch.”

Richie throws his hands up, before bowing out of the conversation, leaving just you and Carmy in the middle of the walkway. You can hear Richie and Tina bickering in hushed tones over by the stove, earning a quiet laugh from you. 

Your heart aches in the best way as you commit this moment to memory.

God, you're going to miss this. 

“You wanna..?” Carmy asks, nodding his head in the direction of the back door. 

You nod in agreement, letting him lead you back out to the alley. 

And now it’s really just the two of you, and while it’s not the most romantic of backgrounds, you’re going to work with what you’ve got. Carmy seems nervous as he fidgets with the ties of his apron. 

“You uh, you sure you don’t want me to take you to the airport?” Carmy asks hesitantly, thinking back to Richie’s earlier comment. 

“Yeah, I’m sure,” you answer with confidence. “Besides, I’d never want to take you away from these guys. You open in a few anyway.”

He smiles, accepting your answer. It’s something he loves about you: that you get it. You understand that sometimes the food’s gotta come first. 

You didn’t know why it felt so weird – so challenging, awkward, strange – to say goodbye to him. Because it wasn’t really a goodbye. And it also was and you’re not sure if you have a name for this feeling yet. 

“Carm?”

“Yeah?”

Instead of answering with words, you just reach over, grabbing that beautiful head of hair of his, and you kiss him. He tastes of the cigarette he smoked on his walk to The Bear and the Altoid mint he had later in his office in anticipation of your arrival. You want to memorize each and every part of this: the way he smells, the way he tastes, the way his hands feel on you. He pulls you in, wrapping his arms around you as you continue your passionate make out – your passionate goodbye kiss – in the alleyway behind the restaurant. 

Your kisses begin to slow down, and before you know it, you’re pulling away from him. 

“Text me when you land, okay?” he asks, a hopeful look in his eyes. 

You nod, “Yes. Yeah. I will.”

And you want to turn to go, but you can’t yet, so you add, “Thanks for inviting me out here.”

He laughs dryly, leaving one more kiss on your lips for the road.

“Thanks for coming to see me. I’ll see you soon.”

A few Tuesdays later

It takes exactly five minutes of being back in New York to realize that Chicago is where you need to be. You don’t regret asking for time to think, but you almost felt silly to worry that you wouldn’t come to this conclusion. You have to go back: to the restaurant, to purpose, to Carmy.

You let yourself think through every little detail, and in each scenario, you know that Chicago is where you’re supposed to be. It had, afterall, been everything you’d felt you were missing. 

Your heart was there, and for once, you were going to let yourself follow it. 

You’d just needed some time to let your head and your heart catch up – get on the same page – and wrapping things up in New York gave you that time to get clear that this was your next step. 

Not that you mind letting the man you adored and some very hot sex cloud your judgment. 

It takes a few weeks, but you and Carmy text every day, even on the busy days. Some days you text a lot, and some it’s just a few exchanges: a ‘good morning’ text, a ‘thinking of you,’ and a ‘goodnight’ text when he’s wrapped up at the restaurant. But it doesn’t bother you. You know what it’s like. Other days, you’re able to sneak in a phone call… maybe even a FaceTime… and if you’re really lucky, you get to talk for hours before either of you realize it’s two in the morning and you should’ve been asleep a long time ago.

People are always coming and going in New York City. It’s why it’s not hard to find a sublet for your apartment, and once you’ve set the ball in motion, it feels impossible to backtrack. After you find the subletter, you tell the restaurant that you’re not coming back and they’re not happy with your decision. You tell them you’re moving to Chicago and only a few people left on staff understand why. Your friends who know you and Carmy aren’t surprised – just as you expected – and by the end of your happy hour catch up, they’re halfway to booking you a ticket to Chicago for that night.

Your parents on the other hand are less than ecstatic. They have more questions, more hesitations, and they want to make sure you’re thinking things through. You tell them that you have, that you’ve combed through every possible scenario, and each time you come to the conclusion that this is what you have to do. 

But they’re happy you’re happy. They say they’ve never seen you like this and you agree. You’ve never felt this way before either. 

You’ve got to stay just a little longer – make sure you can get all your shit sold or moved. Because you’re a responsible adult even when you hate being a responsible adult. It takes a few more days to get an available U-Haul, and you’re all packed up. You’d called Carmy earlier to tell him, but he’s not answering his phone. Sydney hadn’t been in touch either, so you figured they were slammed at the restaurant.

Holy shit. This is really happening, you think to yourself. 

With one foot over the ledge already, you’re off. 

Wednesday, again.

You’ve set him up so well that if he blows it, you’re gonna be pissed. All he has to do is be his normal, annoying, crass self. 

C’mon, Richie, you think to yourself, pleading with the gods that this goes the way you hope it will. 

As you’d told him your plan, he seemed more than happy to oblige. Just rile him up a little just to make the surprise that much better. Richie wouldn’t miss out on an opportunity like that, would he? You can hear shouting coming from the kitchen, and can tell your plan has been set in motion.

“Richie, what the fuck are you talking about? They said what? Who?” Carmy asks, frustratedly.

Yesterday’s dinner service was a shitshow. It’d been slower for lunch this afternoon, and he berates himself for being naive enough to think that he could catch his breath today. The last thing he needed after yesterday was some food critic coming into his restaurant to pick apart all of their hard work. 

“I don’t know, cousin,” Richie shouts back defensively, as if he has no other volume level than that one. “I don’t know if she’s a fuckin’ food critic or not but she sounded like one. Somethin’ about an overseasoned juice or whatever the fuck!” “Jus,” Carmy corrects. “It’s pronounced, ‘zjhoo,’ fucko. Not ‘juice.’ How many times do I have to tell you?”

“Yeah, yeah, fuck if I care,” Richie mutters. “All I’m saying is you should go out there and give the pompous jack hole a piece of your mind.”

“Alright, if it’s going to get you off my back, I’ll do it!” Carmy snaps, having had enough of Richie’s shouting. “Just tell me where she’s sitting so I know who to talk to.”

“At the bar. Christ,” Richie sighs, removing himself from the conversation entirely as he steps away from Carmy. 

Carmy sighs in frustration. He removes his apron before hanging it on one of the wall hooks, then makes his way through the swinging doors that lead to the dining area. It’s still slow, even after the small lunch peak they’d just experienced, and there’s only one woman sitting at the bar. 

You.

It’s then the Carmy realizes he’s been set up. This was all just an act to get him out here – out to the front of house. His breath catches in his throat as he sees you sitting at the bar of his restaurant. You lock eyes with him, and he’s suddenly feeling much more nervous than he previously was. 

“Surprise,” is all you manage to get out, half apologetically.

He makes his way to the open side of the bar, stepping around it so that he can stand on the same side as you. 

“Hey,” he says, even though he’s practically speechless. 

“So uh…” he stammers nervously. Out of all the things he could say to you all he can think of is, “What’s this I hear about an overseasoned jus?” 

You shrug, a devious smile on your face and a sense of mischief in your eyes, “Well I had to come up with something that’d get your attention.”

“It worked. Consider it gotten,” he nods, a blush running all the way down his neck. “Wh-, What’re you doing here?”

He doesn't mean for it to sound so abrupt, but what he really wants to ask is: what does this mean?

You wait, taking half of a beat. 

“I… heard you might be hiring another pastry chef to… you know… help out around here,” you reply, nodding towards the kitchen. Carmy has no idea how you’re playing it so cool, and you’re not sure how you are either. 

“I-, I’d have to talk to Marcus first,” he stammers, matter of factly. His head is spinning, and he can’t breathe, in a good way this time. He can’t believe you’re here and half expects to wake up and realize he’s only dreaming. 

“Of course,” you nod in agreement. 

You pause again, wondering if he’s surprised in a bad way.

“I uh… I called,” you offer up, almost as an apology. 

“We’ve been slammed,” Carmy replies, taking a step closer to you. “And I passed the fuck out last night after service. I’m sorry.”

“No, it’s okay! I-, I figured…” you chuckle, beginning to explain yourself. “I just wanted you to know that-, I mean the rental company had a last minute opening and it was gonna take a few more weeks to get another a U-Haul if I didn’t-. I didn’t intend on making this like… you know this big surprise or anything…”

“... but then I saw Richie first and uh, well, I couldn’t help fucking with you a little bit.”

He laughs, shaking his head at you, “So this was a set up?”

“Oh yeah.”

You stand up, out of the bar chair, taking a step towards him. You look around, noticing that the restaurant is mostly empty, save for a couple in a booth over by the window. 

“You never answered my question. About you. Being here,” Carmy starts, redirecting the conversation back to you. He doesn’t want to get his hopes up – needs you to say you’re here for good before he lets himself feel all of this excitement that’s bubbling up in his body.

“Right. I just came here to tell you that uh, I found someone to take over my lease in New York,” you start, seeing Carmy’s eyes light up. 

God, you’ve missed the way he looks at you. 

“And the urban garden I've been volunteering with… they got me connected with a spot here. Keep my head out of my ass,” you continue, eliciting another laugh from Carmy at your crude comment. 

“Natalie’s-, she and Pete are gonna help find a place too.”

You take another step towards him. 

“You talked to Natalie?” he asks, surprised. 

And he, towards you. 

You shrug, playfully teasing him, “She picks up her phone.”

“Right,” Carmy says shyly. 

If he had picked up his phone you would’ve told him that you were coming and he’s not sure what he would have liked more: knowing ahead of time, or this surprise. Fuck it. He doesn’t care how it happened. He’s just glad he gets to have you.

“I… had a lot of time to think on the drive and-,” you tell him.

“Uh oh,” he interjects, playfully. “That’s never good.”

You shake your head with a laugh, “Will you just shut up and let me get through this?”

He concedes to you, a soft smile on his face as he waits for what you’re going to say next, as you continue your whole boombox over head, throwing stones at the window love confession thing.

“I was thinking that maybe I’d stick around for a while… get a cat or something to keep me company on the days we just can’t stand each other,” you say. 

It’s not what he’s expecting to hear but he understands what you’re really saying. You want to be here. With him. You want to plant roots. 

With him. 

“A cat?” he questions.

“Well, yeah neither of us have time for a dog. We’re both gonna be too busy with the restaurant,” you answer, continuing this scenario you’ve got in your head.

“We?” 

“We.”

Another step. 

He waits for you to say more, but you both understand that anything else would be overcomplicating it. And suddenly you’re standing so close to each other that you’re grateful that there’s only two other people in this restaurant. 

“Does this mean-?” he begins to ask, trailing off toward the end. He looks down at the floor, wondering why he feels so shy. 

“That I packed all my shit up to move here? Yeah,” you reply, confirming his assumptions about where this was going. “When I got back, it took me about five minutes to realize that what I’ve been looking for-, I had it. For a week. Here.”

He looks back up from the floor, to you, his blue eyes staring into your soul. 

You take a pause once more, mustering up all the courage in your body to say what you need to say next. 

“I want to be here, Car. With you. If the offer still stands.” 

He looks at you, you speechless, because he can’t believe this is real. 

But this is real. You’re not dreaming, he reminds himself.

He opens his mouth to say something and all that comes out is, “You hungry?” And you’re shaking your head and laughing, hopelessly in love with the man standing mere inches away from you who can barely get out the words he needs to tell you how he feels. 

“Because I’m sure you’ve had a long trip and I can-,” he continues to ramble, his face inches away from yours.

“God, I fuckin’ love you,” you blurt out, impulsively closing the gap between the two of you. You press your lips to his, giving him the most passionate kiss you’ve perhaps given anyone, and he kisses you back.

Because he loves you too. 

And he never wants to let you go ever again. 

Your kiss is suddenly interrupted by the sounds of voices, cheers, and a few claps, splitting the two of you apart. You both turn to find the entire staff of The Bear, crowded around the door that leads to the kitchen, and peeking out. Tina’s got a proud smile on her face, while Richie is most certainly the one clapping. Marcus is saying an ‘oh shit’ to Sydney while she’s practically squealing at the two of you. 

You and Carmy exchange a look. He looks away, his face turning redder by the second, as you laugh. 

“I called it! What did I say? Did I say three weeks? I think I fuckin' said three weeks." Richie cries out in celebration, his fist pumping into the air in triumph, earning a groan of disappointment from Gary.

"Pay up, fuckos!"

“Wait, what?” Carmy asks, his brows knitted together in confusion. 

Sydney rolls her eyes, beginning to pull a few ten dollar bills out of her apron as Tina mutters an insult in Spanish

“You guys were-,” you start, searching the faces of your future colleagues.

“Betting on how long it would take for you to come back? Yes, chef. Yes we were,” Marcus answers, cheekily. “I said two weeks. Syd put her money on a month, but Richie said three.”

“I just meant that it’s not that easy to move! Not that you wouldn’t come back,” Sydney adds, justifying her guesstimate.

“I said she’d be back in a week,” Tina chimes in.  

“It was clear to us you’d be back. We just didn’t know when,” Gary informs, leaning up against the bar. 

“Well, that’s news to me,” you laugh, shooting Carmy a look that says ‘did you know about this?’

He shakes his head ‘no.’

“You two are also idiots. That was also clear to all of us,” Tina points out, earning a laugh from you and Sydney. 

“Never even cleared your work station, chef,” Marcus adds, nodding back towards the kitchen. “You can uh-, come join us when you’re ready.”

You watch as Marcus disappears, back into the kitchen, hearing the sound or Richie’s more than jovial chants that he was right. Tina’s yelling at him in Spanish and Sydney’s telling Richie to shut the fuck up. 

You’ve missed this. 

“I uh… gotta get back to work,” Carmy says, pulling you out of your head. The blush permeating his face has spread all the way down to his neck and he's not sure how he's supposed to continue the day like this. “Gotta wrap up lunch and prep for dinner.” But he gets to do it with you, so he's gonna figure it the fuck out.

He turns to you, holding out his hand. 

“You comin’ or what?”

You’re beaming as you take his hand, your heart pounding out of your chest. It feels like a beginning of something you don't have the words for, and you're very much okay with that. You're ready to throw caution to the wind and fearlessly dive in -- to take a leap -- as long as you get to do it with him too.

“I thought you’d never ask.”

the end.

taglist: @lazypeachsoul @bookwormvoyageuse @allthefandomstogether @gaysludge @sobshoney @harrysmatcha

[bomberqueen17]

ow

lol so. i'm at home after the farm season right. i have so much writing i have been wanting to do, and i have succeeded at doing some of it! i had a brief "ah chicken season is over" hiatus before The Dread Deturkening, and spent that whole thing writing frantically, hence the solarpunk tall ships idea which is still in progress btw-- I did finally start a for real draft version to solicit feedback and now I realize a bunch of people's tumblr handles is not a great way to actually connect so i need to figure out how to do that-- which is beside the point of this post--

anyway. now that it's For Real Hiatus From Farm Season I'm trying to actually get my life in order and not succeeding very well.

Dude's company laid off a bunch of his team and therefore shut down the local office, so he, being the last man standing, had to go in and clear the space out. As part of that, his former desk is sitting in our garage, and I'm trying to clear out space for it in the basement. The basement is a black hole of fuckery because one year ago, some of you may remember, we had our kitchen remodeled, and we had contracted to do it in February but they called us the last week of November and said can we do it now instead, which sure but it meant I had to haul seventeen years' worth of stuff out of the kitchen into Literally Anywhere Else and then they needed me to clear out part of the basement erroneously believing they were putting in a new support pillar, which they weren't, but then they needed me to clear out a path to the back wall of the basement because the electricians needed to install a whole new panel there, so like, ok cool but it just meant a lot of things got haphazardly hauled from one corner of the basement to another in tremendous hurry with no time for keeping track of what's what. So that's a disaster and now's the time to fix it.

I have also been hauling some of it to the attic. I had been using the desk in the spare room for sewing on the days when Dude was working from his office. Since those days no longer happen, I have no access to those machines now, which are stacked in a corner. The basement is now too crowded for me to resume using the little space I'd carved out down there, so I have put some sewing stuff into the attic, which isn't insulated and is rather drafty now. But anyway. I'm rearranging a lot of things and can't make progress on any projects while that's happening.

I got a ton of reorganizing done on Monday evening in the basement (having spent the whole morning hauling shit out of dude's former office, which is now surrendered and locked and all set), and yet more Tuesday, and was hoping to finish it yesterday but Tuesday evening I fucked up my back, it felt all crunchy, and I was really worried until I woke up Wednesday in just torrents of gore, which I realized is my new perimenopausal normal-- I've started to realize that menstruation does fucky shit to all my connective tissues, so I shouldn't actually worry about my lower back destroying itself if it's also Cramp Time. So I spent yesterday absolutely immobile, dosed up on ibuprofen and just like that scene out of the Shining except wrapped in blankets and drinking herbal tea.

I also spent much of yesterday just. Unconscious? Which was weird. I don't know why I'm so fatigued but at least I'm sleeping.

(I also cleaned the oven. Do not recommend, especially not when one's lower back is doing mysterious rice krispie impressions.)

So today I was hoping to get back to work but I do feel like I've been beaten with sticks. Maybe instead I will finish working out how to get people who've expressed interest in beta-reading into a google doc.

A not so hilarious side note is that if I do not have a desk to sit at I have trouble organizing my thoughts?? IDK it's very weird but there are several tasks I need to do where I'll need to have my laptop and a sheet of paper in front of me I think, and my brain is like "illegal unless At Desk" and that's tough shit since I don't have a desk. I had started noticing it over the summer in the cabin where I also don't have a desk. How do I organize my thoughts if I can't Sit At A Desk to do it????? One would think I'd figure it out since i've spent most of my life without a desk of my very own, but. Not so far!!! Not currently.

Also a major thing my brain is Not Allowing me to do is finish preparing for Christmas. I'm not seeing family for Christmas, for the like tenth year in a row because every year we arrange to do it together my older sister fucking flakes out, and this year it was the off year but she flaked out of thanksgiving instead-- i'm not saying she doesn't flake out for good reasons, one of her kids was real sick and i'm not mad, but the fact remains, we're not seeing that bit of the family and she's not letting us make any contingency plans, so my brain is like Fine No Christmas Then and won't let me figure out what to get people for gifts and it is actually a problem because some of those people are kids and are expecting me to figure it out anyway.

argh.

my beloved godfather, my Type A mom's little underachieving alcoholic gay probably ADHD depressed college dropout brother, never was good at christmas presents for us kids either, and still managed to hold it together better than I am despite being in a relationship with a man who wouldn't allow him to tell us nieces about him and so he just showed up to all our family events and was my uncle's "friend" and we all figured it out anyway so there was no point hiding it from us but ugh they still did and i remember us at some point in the 90s, all us sisters sitting together ranging in age from high school down to elementary school and my older sister being like "we all know they're gay right" and us all being like "yeah why can't we just say it" and the oldest sister looking at me, who even then everybody knew was the gay one, and i was like "man i don't know" and we all just solemnly agreed to not mention it...

anyway

he did better than this but he died of lung cancer in '08 so I can't ask him how he managed it. (what i have in my favor is that my dad's side of the family gave me asthma so i never could have taken up smoking, so at least that won't kill me.)

He never got an ADHD diagnosis tho so I can't find out what meds he took. Well, he took whiskey, we know that. It didn't work though. and he wasn't really a loser, i've met so many people who knew and loved him now that i'm an adult and sometimes go around in the city where he lived. even now so many people remember him so fondly. and he bragged about us, his nieces, all the time, all these people know who i am as soon as i mention him. boy i miss him!!!

this is the miracle of the ADHD brain I was fretting about house cleaning and now i'm grieving my long-dead uncle, who of course I knew mostly through the lens of my mother who literally never understood him in the slightest.

[kcalsforhim]

˖⋆࿐໋ tuesday 10th of december

⋆˙⟡

i weighed in first thing in the morning, cause i’ve been eating like shit and im honestly tired of myself ?

i don’t remember how i felt when i woke up, maybe not good.. either way i went to class. today i had a full gloomy bear outfit.. a cute sweater… a bag… and i brought my plush since he’s just adorable. i even added the tag to the bag zipper for a little extra bit of cute. i drew my oc in class the entire time basically and then we left. i drank an energy drink

when walking to the station haku had to leave early, which was totally fine. he was going to set up a christmas tree with his little brother.. i don’t think my parents are setting up a christmas tree this year

when walking from my local train station back home it was so freezing cold.. so so so cold.. my hands were turning into stone. i walked so quickly so i could get home quicker.. then it was time for omad

dinner / omad : chicken with some sauce, rice, broccoli

cals : 354

the chicken was good, i put a little on my plate when my mom was out of the kitchen i even put a piece back. i consider buying food from the store all the time, but ill probably stop doing that for the time being… i have to buy lots of christmas presents nowadays. the rice was.. well rice. the broccoli was good, i put a little bit of soya sauce on it, that made it taste pretty good

chamomile tea with 0 sugar sweetener tablets

no sweet treat today, but i did have this tea.. it was regular tea. last month i tried to liquid fast for a week and i drank so much tea im kind of traumatised, but my mom offered this to me and i do like tea despite that so i accepted.

later in the night i really wanted a pancake, but i couldn’t, i already started my fast, and i wasn’t supposed to break it. i made a promise to eli i wouldn’t binge anymore, or otherwise she’s not allowed to buy me a christmas present (i really want that present, and she REALLY wants to buy it for me) and well, i did want the pancakes but i ended up not doing it ; i just cried LOLLLL but it’s fine

i just drew for the end of the night and then i went to bed around 11pm.. pretty standard

cals : 354

steps : 14.6 k

today was ok, i felt kind of numb, i didn’t really feel much of anything, i was hungry but.. if i just don’t have anything, i can’t hurt myself. taking the joy out of eating is very hard for me, but today i felt no joy. i didn’t get to pick what i had, i did like it, but it’s not like i had anything in particular to look forward to eating.. it was okay.

i have this oc that is really creepy and maybe a bit awkward.. he’s very handsome, and he listens to these kinds of songs on a record player while he butchers up body parts for his boss to eat for dinner… while i was drawing him yesterday, i fell asleep listening to his playlist

⋆˙⟡

[writing-whump]

Sensory overload

☕️-anon wished to see how Hector and Arnie were doing in the meantime, so here we go. A bit of Arnie and Hector plus Olive and some emeto.

Arnie found Hector glaring at his phone on the couch at 7 pm.

"I don't think you can make it bend to your will that way," Arnie said as he rubbed at his eyes.

Since Sunday he had trouble sleeping for some reason, waking up at 5 or 6 am although he was never a morning person. He would turn in bed for two hours, trying to get himself back to sleep, but to no avail. It left him tired and grumpy, cause he wanted to sleep but couldn't.

To compensate, he took frequent naps during the day, like the one he just woke up from. Probably worsening the problem by not being tired enough to sleep through the next morning again.

Hector grumbled something, leaning back with his coffee only for his eyes to return to the phone screen 10 seconds later.

"Who's not answering?"

Hector scoffed, like the name wasn't worth saying out loud. Arnie kept quiet and watched him until his older brother finally caved. "Isaiah."

"Oh? It's so rare for you to message him." Arnie sat down behind the table, still disoriented from sleep.

"Yeah. And just when I do he ignores me. Isn't it weird?"

"I told you he planned some special anniversary thing with Seline on Saturday. That's why we weren't meeting. And then she likely stayed over so he had his hands full over the weekend."

"It's Tuesday," Hector protested.

"It's summer break," Arnie reminded. "More busy with free time with his pack and stuff."

"That's why I..." Hector turned his head away to scowl at the twilight behind the window.

"What was that?" Arnie gave up on the table and went to sit down next to Hector instead, grabbing his untouched coffee from his hand. "Look, you have been super busy during the holidays. You work 25 hours from 24 each day or train or claim some new territories you don't need. Isaiah can't be waiting around for you to make time for him."

Arnie didn't mean himself at all when he said it. He felt more than a little neglected by Hector's constant 'work' excuses. It was his last holiday before starting university and Hector was nowhere to be found.

Hector growled at the cup being taken out of his hand but said nothing. "That's why I wanted...never mind."

Arnie took a sip and grimaced at the taste. No sugar. "Wanted what?"

Hector bared his teeth at no one in particular. "I thought we could plan a trip, okay?! Just the three of us. I'm fed up with the city, so I thought we could do mountain climbing or some shit in nature. And when I suggest it, he doesn't respond. Asshole."

Arnie sighed. "That's really nice, Hex. I'm sure he will like it once he sees it." The younger blond leaned back on the couch. "You know how Isaiah is with the phone detox thing. He likes to take breaks from screens and being available."

"It's the girl," Hector spit out angrily. "Just when we get him back he has to have a girlfriend and a new pack to piss me off."

Arnie rolled his eyes. "We are not losing him to Seline, come on."

"Women always destroy families. Especially brothers. And wolves."

"I'm sorry, how many experiences do you have with that?" Arnie said with a snort.

"Oh, not you too!" Hector crossed his arms on his chest, sliding farther away from him on the couch.

Arnie chuckled. Delaney and Hector's other closest wolves have been bringing it up from time to time now. That Hector should be looking for a partner soon, ideally a witch to cement his position as branch leader.

Everyone knew wolves couldn't rule alone. Stability came from relationships, from functioning compatibility. A leader should have a witch to lead with, to offer to the pack, to bring them all together.

Hector, who had zero interest in dating since Arnie could remember, saw this part as particularly annoying.

"So. You gonna be in this splendid mood for the rest of the evening or we putting on something on Netflix?" Arnie yawned, putting the coffee away.

Hector got up, pacing the living room. "Can't sit still. I'll go for a run."

"You gonna leave me here alone?" Arnie pouted. Free evening and Hector was gonna spend it away again?

"You can join me," Hector said with a knowing smirk.

Arnie groaned. Hector knew he was not very keen on exercise. Being around a superhuman you could never hope to keep up and who would never let you win even knowing this was rather demotivating.

"I thought so. Enjoy wasting your life on useless Netflix shit, I'm leaving."

Arnie huffed and slid down on the sofa into a more comfortable position. Agitated Hector needed the exercise to keep his shadow calm. It was for the best.

...........

If you looked for a piece of quite in a crowded city such as Vienna, school grounds were the safest bet during summer.

It was tiring for wolves to be this surrounded by humans, noise and scenes all the time. Hector felt like the proximity of the buildings got only smaller, squeezing the air out of him.

He needed open space. Nature. Something green with a free view of the sky and the horizon.

Hector ended up back at the university campus at the bench near the ditch he found Matthew passed out not that long ago.

Of course he wanted the campus for himself now. He spend so much of his time there because of the uni that it felt like a base to him.

It was surprisingly lively on the way to the Messe, lights and people coming and going like fireflies drawn to light of the giant exhibition building. None went through the dark space around the bench though, for which Hector was grateful.

Not until his name suddenly echoed through the whole park.

Olive pushed her way through the crowd, which was quite an achievement since she was so small. "Hector! I didn't expect to see you here!"

Hector shrugged. "Just passing by." It always fascinated him how happy Olive seemed whenever she saw him. Her whole face lit up, her smoky gray eyes so big like a doe's.

"Oh." She stopped at the bunch, a cute little pout to her mouth. "So you are not coming to the expo?" When he looked perplexed, she continued, "Illusion and light play exhibition! It's just here for a few weeks."

Ah. That explained the liveliness.

Olive shuffled her feet. She wore a white button-up that hugged her slightly chubby figure, an orange-red necktie, short black hair hidden under a red beanie, and bright red shoes. Hector internally shook his head. Artists had the weirdest tastes.

"Would you...like to come too? I have been there several times, I know the best parts!"

She got excited so easily about the smallest things. If an exhibition or a nice sunset or a collection of crayons could make him so happy...then again, why not? He was not managing to stop thinking about Isaiah's unread messages and he could use a break from thoughts about his duties and goals before they started turning in circles too much.

"Whatever." He got up to his feet, which made Olive almost bounce on her feet.

"You are going to love it!" She actually grabbed his arm, dragging him forward.

Hector blinked at the contact. He wasn't sure how he felt about her being so comfortable touching him. On some level, he suspected she didn't realize he was a wolf or who he was in that world, but he couldn't bring himself to tell her. It was amusing how relaxed she was, how she treated him with such friendliness. Was that normal with girls around guys?

Besides, it made him feel all smug he managed to throw people off his scent as a wolf. Managing this degree of control to not be recognized by the energy and danger wolves emitted or the thickness and reactiveness of their shadows was a point of pride for civilized wolves.

As they got inside and he automatically paid the ridiculously small tickets for them both, he wondered if there wasn't something else. Hector liked who he was. He was proud of who he was, and he never pretended to be anything else.

He was the Executioner's younger brother. He was Vincent Wolfson's son. He was the pack leader's nephew and chosen branch leader in a city as big as Vienna, in the heart of Western and Eastern Europe. Destined to achieve something big, to take over one day. That was his aim—he wasn't secretive about it.

But with Olive he was...just a guy. A stuck-up economy student who could be too blunt at times, but that she, for some reason, found amusing.

The exhibition's theme was the universe. There were seperate rooms projecting different light plays, from infinite space to exploding suns, kinetic installations, Milky ways changing colours, labyrinths of mirrors and light sculuptures.

Olive kept dragging him around, showing him her favorite pieces and projections, flooding him with background information and cool facts he didn't have the vocabulary to understand.

His eyes were beginning to hurt. The constant onslaught of lights that were actually everything but regular, the flashing patterns and ever-changing chaotic rooms...there were no points of reference. And worse, there were so many people—smashed together in an even tighter space, like a city, but smaller.

Hector felt a dull, throbbing headache building behind his temples. It reminded him of the subway, but worse. The lights were too much, the noise was too much. The rooms were spinning and turning, blending together and then spitting him out in confusing directions.

His stomach felt unsettled, waves of queasiness coming and going. Sweat was forming on his upper lip and at the back of his neck.

"O-Olive..." he blinked and screwed his eyes shut, stopping where he was, reaching with his hand in search of something solid. A wall or a door, something that wasn't moving.

"Hector? Hey, wait, what's wrong?"

"G-..." he gulped, his stomach feeling impossibly heavy. Heat went to his face and chest, intensifying the nausea. He gagged, slapping his hand against his mouth. "Get me out-"

He couldn't see in the confusion, the hall was too dark to contrast the effect of the rooms.

"Okay, just a second." A small hand closed around his. Hector squeezed it, maybe too tightly in his disorientation, mouth overflowing with saliva. Damn, he needed to sit down. The claustrophobic feeling was back and he gagged again, splash of acid against his throat.

Her small hand and trace of scent led the way and he let her, the only familiar focus point in the chaos of people and lights hurting his eyes. He crashed against the door on the way and cursed, but the pain of something solid against his side was a relief.

"Just a couple of steps," Olive said, tugging at his arm. "Almost there, I promise."

Hector unglued himself from the door with great difficulty, one more door coming up, when finally, finally he was hit with a wall of fresh air.

He gulped down on the semi-clean night wind greedily, panting to breathe against the nauseating sensation. Almost winning the round, if his stomach didn't cramp that moment and he groaned.

"Okay, okay, let's sit you down, okay?" Both of Olive's hands were wrapped around his arm, using all her weight and strength to steer him to the side of the entrance.

He couldn't tell where the bench was or where they were going. The ground was tilting again, all wrong and his knees buckled, sending him to the ground. Olive didn't let go, going down with him.

"I guess not. Okay, let's stay here, it's fine-"

Hector gagged, the world going deaf for a second and then retched as his dinner came out with a splash against the yellowed grass. At least it wasn't the pavement, that would have splattered more.

Olive was still under his arm, pressed into his side. Her hand snaked around his shoulders, tapping gently. "Feel better?" Her eyes were so wide again, glittering with concern.

"Sorry," he rasped. His body heaved with another retch but he fought it down. "Don't know what-"

"The lights. I'm sorry, I didn't know. The movement and lights can be overwhelming for more sensitive people-"

Hector scoffed, rocking up and down in attempt to catch his bearings. Why was he always throwing up around this girl? "I'm not sensitive."

"I didn't mean it like that," she said sharply, indignant now. "I mean, prone to motion sickness or with senses like shadow wolves. You can't say they are sensitive, can you? But there is even a warning at the entrance that it isn't good for them, cause there is a higher risk of sensory overload."

"Ah. That makes sense, then." He let himself fall back to sit on the ground properly, spreading his hands out. The world was still spinning, but it was slowing down a little.

Olive let go of him, kneeling at his side. "Huh?"

"I'm a shadow wolf too, Olive." Hector focused his eyes on her, wary of her reaction. "You really had no idea."

Her mouth made a little o, looking even more winded than he was. "Oh wow."

Hector cleared his throat. "So what? Scared of me now?" He shifted away. Normally, he enjoyed people being wary of him, of respecting his power, but the idea of Olive being scared of him wasn't appealing at all.

Maybe that was also one of the reasons he was in no hurry to correct her.

A flush crept up her face. "No, I'm not! I'm..."

"I wasn't hiding it, you know?"

"Right. The turf talk, and the people always behind your back. And how sick you felt at the subway...I just didn't...I never spoke to a wolf before. What does that- what does that mean now?" She covered her mouth with both hands. "Does that mean I was breaking all the rules of interaction? I'm sorry, I didn't know-"

Hector chuckled dryly, which turned into a cough and into another small gag. "Damn it."

Olive lifted herself up on her knees, gripping his shoulder. "You still feeling icky?"

Icky? What kind of word was that? He felt comforted by her unconscious touch though. On some level, he still didn't feel like a wolf to her. "Nah, almost good." He closed his eyes for a second, breathing through the sudden heat wave, letting out a loud burp against his hand before letting it fall to his side again.

"What does that mean for me?" Olive asked in a small voice. "You are not going to kidnap me or eat me or something, right?"

Hector had to laugh again. "No. That's not in our rules either." He looked at her hand on his biceps, realizing for the umpteenth time he didn't mind her touch as much as he should have. Not at all. Somehow she had touched herself into his shadow's graces and sense of space. "You don't have to follow any rules. Not with me. I'm too high up to mind," he reassured her.

She ducked her head, and when he tried to straighten up to catch her eye, he lost his balance and flopped right onto his back.

"Oh, so high up," she said with an involuntary giggle, leaning over him. "You okay?" Her hand climbed higher on his arm all the way to the top of his shoulder. "You are so sweaty."

"And dizzy," he admitted with a grimace. His arm shot up to grab onto her hand that was touching him. "A little warning, Olive. Wolves tend to think anything they are touching is theirs. You keep doing that," his eyes rose slowly over her arm to her body, "and I might forget how to let go."

Olive blushed even more, her round cheeks furiously red. Oh, he could get used to that expression.

Part 2

[thotofthecentury]

fuckboy!angela x reader college au

could be read as a part 2 to my last one, but isn’t required to read this

TR: dubious consent, briefly

“You haven’t said anything since you last spoke?” Mariah whispers from across the library table.

“No!” you whisper-shout back. “I’ve done everything I can to avoid her! I am out of the room when she doesn’t have class, I go to bed before she gets back-“

“God, just ask her out already,” Chanse groans into his hands at normal volume.

You and Mariah both shush him, looking around, perhaps a bit paranoid.

“Not yet!” Mariah replies at the same time you say, “Are you crazy?”

The last time you spoke to your roommate, Angela, was Tuesday. Today is Friday. Your suddenly super hot, sexy, and very flirtatious roommate.

“You can’t avoid her forever,” Chanse whispers like you didn’t know that. Like that hasn’t been on your mind since she found out you were a virgin. To face her… now that she knows…

The words ‘you can’t avoid her forever’ loom over you like a cloud. Or more like a loaded gun. It’s nighttime and you suspect Angela’s going to stay over at a girl’s dorm, being Friday night and all, but you never know.

You’ve never felt more vulnerable or practically humiliated than when she called you out for being a virgin. When she called you out for not-so-secretly masturbating while she hooked up with a girl in the next bed! But it was just a one time thing. It’s over. There’s nothing more you can do but to coexist with her.

An hour passes and you’re ready for bed. It’s 2:30 in the morning. Just because you’re a bit of a prude doesn’t mean you don’t have fun on Friday nights. If ‘have fun’ means watch reality tv for hours on end instead of doing homework. Angela’s called you lame for it, but at least you’re having fun.

You turn out the lights and lay down, getting all comfy to go to bed, knowing you won’t have to get up uber early to leave the room before Angela wakes. No way she’s waking up from whatever hangover she’s about to suffer from anytime before lunch.

You wake with a start to a soft thud on the outside of your door. Probably someone drunk stumbling to their room.

“Shit,” you hear from the hallway along with a keycard hitting the tile floor. It’s Angela’s voice.

Fuck, fuck, fuck. You look over to the clock. 3:43.

You are not letting this ruin your very peaceful slumber. You roll over and pretend you didn’t hear a thing. Surprisingly, falling back to sleep wasn’t a challenge. Must have taken her a while to figure out how to unlock the door completely wasted.

You feel your hand grab your own boob under your shirt. Your hips rock slowly into… something. The pressure between your legs grows. Your eyes open to a pitch black room. 4:17, the glowing red digital clock reads. Both of your hands are suddenly back to your sides. The wetness between your thighs is obvious. You’ve had sex dreams before, but this was different. There was no dream part. Out of nowhere, your body reacted. To something? You guess you bunched up part of your blanket in your sleep and shoved it between your legs.

There’s warmth still on your boob and when you go to touch it, you touch a hand. Your heartbeat quickens. Then you feel a body beside you, touching you, leaning against you to not fall off the twin size bed. You know who it is.

You gasp and raise yourself onto your elbows.

“What the fuck?” you whisper. You hate yourself for whispering. This is not a time to whisper.

She shushes you softly, moving her hand from your boob to your face. One finger presses over your lips.

“Don’t,” she whispers. “It’s ok.”

“What are you doing?” you say quietly, obeying her.

“I wanted to help,” she whispers into your ear before kissing your neck. Her hand goes between your legs, toying with the hem of your underwear. You never bunched together your blanket. Her hand’s been there before. How much before?

“I-I don’t-“ you start but cut yourself off with an unintentional moan as she pulls a finger up over your clothed clit.

“Wait, stop,” you try.

“I don’t think you really want me to,” she hums into your neck.

“Y-Yes I do-“ you moan again.

“Fuck, stop it,” you try to sit up, pushing her hand away with one of yours. You’re out of breath and so insanely turned on.

She places her hand on your inner thigh.

“Y/n, let me help you. I’ve seen the way you look at me,” she swipes her tongue from the base of your neck to your ear. “I’m doing this for you. It will be quick, I bet you won’t last long.” Her breath is directly on your ear, her hot, hot breath. There’s a faint smell of alcohol coming from her.

“Angela, I don’t-“ you want to say you don’t want her to but yes you do. She’s ever so slightly pulling your thigh, spreading your legs, and you clench around nothing.

“Say the word ‘no’ and I’ll go to bed,” her hand squeezes your inner thigh.

“I-“ you moan again.

“Mmm, what was that?” she teases, licking your neck again.

“God, just fucking do it,” you say. It felt like another person said it. But you know it was you because her fingers push your underwear to the side and she plunges a finger deep inside you.

You swallow, hard.

She wiggles the tip of her finger against your g-spot and you grasp her wrist. You push her in deeper.

“Angela, more,” your whispers are strained.

“How can I deny you?” she whispers back. She adds another finger and roughly pushes into you to her knuckles. She leaves her fingers there for a moment. Her fingers are larger than yours, that’s for sure. Your knees threaten to close.

All while leaving her fingers inside you, she positions herself between your thighs with her other elbow next to your head to keep herself up right.

“Does that feel good?” she asks, the streetlight reflects off her big brown eyes that now look down at you.

“M-mhmm,” you whimper.

“You’re going so good, honey,” she says as she starts to finally thrust her fingers in and out. Her wrist lines up with her pelvis so she begins using her hips as well, to drive her fingers into you. The palm of her hand digs into your clit with every thrust.

The bed begins to make the smallest thump against the wall behind it.

You’ve never felt your g-spot and clit be used at the same time and it’s making you crazy. The leans all her body weight into you creating the best pressure imaginable. Her mouth surely leaving marks along your neck.

“I think I’m-“ you try but it comes out as a moan.

“It’s ok,” Angela whispers without relenting her pace. “You can come, y/n.”

“Fuck, Angela,” your legs squeeze her waist and your hands scratch her back as you come. You grind into her, reveling in your aftershocks. Once you relax, she pulls out of you and brings her fingers to your lips. You take them into your mouth, licking between her fingers. She doesn’t break eye contact. You’ve tasted yourself before but never on someone else and you’ve obviously never had Angela’s fingers in your mouth before which is really what you’re loving about this.

Angela leans down to connect your lips, tongue darting between them. Your tongues meet and it’s like heaven. She pulls away and you’re certain you saw a string of spit in the faint streetlight.

“You kissed me,” you say softly.

She raises an eyebrow at you before flopping onto her back beside you. “Yeah, I also just fucked you, keep up,” she laughs.

You turn over to look at her silhouette. “Yes, but you didn’t while you were…”

“Fucking you,” she provides nonchalantly.

“Yeah,” you sigh and you are so glad there’s no light on. Your cheeks are undoubtedly bright red.

“Be grateful because I usually don’t kiss a girl until the third hookup,” she adds. Ah, there’s your roommate Angela.

You close your eyes, meditating for a moment instead of lecturing her on treating women with respect.

“Hey, so that was really hot and I’m really turned on now,” Angela says. “I don’t expect you to do the same for me, but would you mind if I took care of it? I can go to my bed-“

“Don’t go,” you cut her off.

She smiles a stupid half smile. “You can, y-you should,” you stutter. “I want you to do that… here… I want to watch.”

[cheeeeseburger]

Dream girl Part 7

Next part

Sidney Crosby x Reader

Masterlist

A/N: What is this, another part on the same night, with a third one on the way? I'm on fireeeeee. Anyway, English is not my first language, enjoy!

Quickly, you and Sidney fell into a routine. He made you breakfast in the morning; you packed him snacks with a little note. The note was usually a joke, and it always made him smile.

At night, when he was not busy playing in another city, the two of you would cook dinner together. He knew you hate touching raw meat, so he cut the chicken while you seasoned the veggies. Sidney thinks his life was meant to look like that.

But he also noticed the way your eyes watered when you looked at your cellphone, or how you avoided attending his games in person. It didn’t take a genius to figure out who the texts were from and who you were not looking forward to see again.

So far, you had managed to hide to your boyfriend that you were living with Sidney. The rookie still thought you were living with your friend. The captain just wanted to scream it to the world, but you wouldn’t let him, afraid of creating drama, especially since the playoffs were soon approaching. The rookie still thought you were living with your friend, and you let him believe that.

Sidney’s feelings were as strong as ever, but he wasn’t sure about yours. He knew for a fact they were there because of your promise to him, but also because he noticed them in the heat charged gazes you sent him and the way your eyes would trail his mouth, his jaw, his chest.

For his sake and the sake of your relationship (which was nothing but your two names on a dotted line because of the condo), you two established nonofficial limits. Of course, there had been moments when those rules were nearly broken, but how could they not, when two consenting adults were crazy for the other and living under the same roof?

The Penguins had just won the game, and Sidney was on fucking fire. It felt good to win, but it felt even better knowing you would be waiting at home for him.

When he did come home, though, you were not waiting for him in the living room like you usually did. Instead, he heard vague noises coming from upstairs.

“Sweet? Are you okay?” He nearly ran upstairs and knocked on your door.

“Uh, yeah. Just a second, please!” After a minute or two, you opened the door, a slight flush on your cheeks. “Hey, Sid. Congrats on the game. You played so well. That second goal was phenomenal.” Okay, you were definitely blushing and avoiding looking at him.

Suddenly, he recognized those sounds. You had made similar ones back when you and the rookie were still living together in his basement. The noises, the light layer of sweat, the blushing, it all made sense: you were touching yourself, and hopefully, you were thinking about him while doing it.

“Thanks, sweet. Glad you saw it. I just wanted to check up on you. I’m going to let you finish now.” He said that last part with a wink. Busted. You turned crimson. He was grinning from ear to ear.

“Um, yeah. I’m going to do that. Goodnight!” You nearly shut the door in his face. He heard you say “oh my god” repeatedly under your breath. Sidney chuckled. He was secretly glad you closed the door so quickly because he wouldn’t have been able to hide his erection any longer.

He entered his own bedroom, not fully closing the door. His hand was immediately in his pants. Knowing that you were doing the same thing basically next door did it for him. None of you knew, but you finished at the same time.

Sidney avoided the rookie at all costs in the locker room without it being too obvious. It took all of his self-control to not punch the defenseman in the face when he talked shit about his girlfriend that refused to talk to him. In his mind, he had done nothing wrong. Fucking idiot.

One Tuesday, while he was brushing his teeth, you came into the bathroom and sat on the counter. It was clear it was a rough night for you. Your phone had been blowing up all night and he heard you curse your boyfriend’s name. Sidney just wished you would break up with him. He did not know why you refused to, even though you would clearly never get back with him ever again. You acted like you were taken anyway, never daring to cross a line with Sidney. It was not his place to comment, but it was starting to burden him. He wanted to understand, but the old posts on your social media of your perfect relationship were a constant reminder.

“I wish I could be your mistress.” He nearly spit out his toothpaste. “What?”

“Yeah. That way, I wouldn’t be cheating on anyone.” Honestly, that was a pretty cheap thing to say. It was selfish and you only said it out of misery.

“But I would have to cheat on someone, and I would never do that to anyone.” Maybe his tone was cold, because your eyes misted immediately.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said that, Sid. I just meant that I want us to be together, but I can’t cheat on him either.”

“Then why don’t you break off with him?” The words came out harsher than he intended them to.

“I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know! It’s so stupid, but I can’t bring myself to, and he only wants to have me back. I know he’s awful to me, but he was my first love, and I always imagined we would get married someday, you know? I guess I’m waiting for a good reason, even though I have an endless list of reasons why!” Tears welled up in your eyes.

“Hey, hey, don’t cry, okay? I’m sorry for saying that. I guess I’m just impatient, and maybe a little bit hurt.”

“Oh Sidney, I’m so, so sorry. You have to hang on to my promise, because I will stay true to it. I never wanted to hurt you. It won’t be long, I swear. I want you, Sidney Crosby. Will you wait for me a while more?”

He sighed softly. “Of course I will, my love. I’ll always wait for you.”

To seal the deal, you softly pressed your lips on him. At first, he was too shocked to do anything, but Sidney quickly returned the gesture with a soft kiss. He shared the taste of the toothpaste with you. A few seconds or minutes later, you pulled away shyly.

“Goodnight, Sidney.” You jumped of the counter and Sidney watched you leave the room in awe, his feelings even more conflicted than before. At least, you had given him hope.

The next day, the note on his snack was a kiss. Like an actual kiss made with your lipstick. He pinned it proudly in his locker.