#/ some of the funniest has come out of him getting mad at people picking on him.

[moonspower]

ngl one of my FAV things to see in this blog along side the rping is how we all bully Vi like sterotypic disney TV show characters ) )

✨ @chazingrainbows we love putting him through grief!!!

no look it's so funny to me because vi does kind of get big-headed and then people end up dragging him thru several layers of hell with a side of fries. it makes for some of the funniest stuff! because the usual topics on this blog are so heavy, so the comedic relief is funny. i dont mind him being the butt of a joke.

:/// i imagine you all grabbing his short ass by the collar of his shirt, shaking him around like a maraca, and then tossing him into a garbage bin.

as deserved........

[defectivefanboy]

Hi darling! How are you? How have you been? Sorry for bothering, I wanted to request! You really write very well and keep up with the good work! So anyways.. Can I request smut for Alastor, Lucifer & Crimson reacting to their girlfriend wear a lingerie?

Thank you so much! Have a lovely day/night!!

　　　∧_∧::

(´･ω･`)::

/⌒ ⌒)::

/へ_＿ / /::

(＿＼＼ ﾐ)/::

｜ `-イ::

/ )::

/／ ／::

／ ／::

( く:::

|＼ ヽ:::

Imma go ahead and ignore that icky word that's in there and make it S/O because I want to write Alastor. Here is my request page for anyone who wants to in the future. Please take a read before you come into my inbox :D

Can I request smut for Alastor, Lucifer & Crimson reacting to their [REDACTED] wearing lingerie?

Overall notes: Stories written on this blog are GN until specified. While this story uses they/them pronouns, and while I don't mind female readers on my blog/interacting, love my girlies, hey girlies~, but I do not write female reader, and if you are a fetishizer. fuck off??? ew. How would you even do that on an x reader???

C/W: NSFW topics, Each character will have their own respective warnings, Sexual content, duh, no pronouns used, Bottom! reader favored, Established relationships. OOC?, I mean this would never happen, so yeah ooc

Notes: the giggle I had to stop when I got to Alastor good god, but Lucifer was honestly the funniest and most enjoyable to write. I had a smile on my face the whole time

Crimson ♧︎...

C/W: Slight Voyeurism (mention of his right hand man Alessio), Degradation, he def has a sir kink, don't lie to me, mention of stealing/sugarbaby (hes an asshole) mention of stalkers? admirers?? idk he just mentions people leaving you gifts,

For being an old (mafia) man. He's not opposed to a little dress up

Only if its you though. He would NEVER

He would be into something with a little more class.

Never will his darling look like some 2 cent floozy

So none of that crotchless bull honky. While he wouldn't be mad at it, he would rather leave more to the imagination. Something to work for, y'know?

And he would certainly work for it.

You really wanna get him going? Accentuate your hips. That's something him and Moxxie can agree. They like their darling with a little bit of width~

If you are gonna wear something for him, you best put on a show while you're at it.

He waits to do business after dinner, so why not let him enjoy his meal

For an asshole he has some manners now

Always making you cum once or twice before even taking your outfit off.

It likes to wait before unwrapping his gift <3

But once he gets more accustom to your interest

He's definitely going to be the one buying you the set

well its his money that's being used, Al is the one who goes and picked them up. Poor baby...

"You're so needy, baby. But did you need to go and make yourself out to be a whore in the middle of a meeting?" Crimson said as he placed a hand on your waist. His desk might not be the most comfortable place, but it will do for now. It's not like he can ignore you when you got all dolled up for him.

"I don't remember buying this one. Alessio leaving you gifts now too?" His fingers slid under the thin fabric as you let out a soft whine before answering, "I got them,.. custom made, sir." you said, trying to steady your breathing as his hands wandered between your legs. You let out a yelp as he spreads your legs out more for himself.

"And where are you getting this money from, huh? Hope you're not stealing it from me, brat." He gives you a soft glare and a questioning look as his eyes scan over the fabric that covered you, before his spotted the embroidered 'C. Knolastname' on the front of the waist band. With his index finger and thumb, he hooked them around the band and traced the deigned. Crimson gives you a smirk and placed a kiss right under your belly button before moving down.

"Hmm... maybe i do have a use for that ring then after all, but i should repay this favor before hand. Right, (Y/n) Knolastname?"

Lucifer 𓅰...

C/W: light choking, another one with a superiority kink, mentions of god (he calls himself it), size kink for the fact I thought this man was like 5'8-10 come to look up his like 6'2-3, slight crack fic (because he wouldn't take anything seriously until truly needed, he giggles when you change in front of him, it's always a crack fic with him)

HE HAS A MATCHING SET!!

god how my perception of these characters have been warped

but he has most definitely bought you outfits before, probably the only one to go out of his way to get matching ones.

Even got a few custom ones made, you can always tell by the little duck embroidered somewhere on them.

He's game for anything you wanna wear. He isn't gonna stop you, if anything he's gonna encourage you to wear more.

He's helpless for you in such a pretty outfit and it's all for him?

He feels loved and he's sure to pay that back ten fold in the bedroom.

You might not allowed to be in heaven, but he can show you what it was like~

I maaay..be a bit delusional, but in private I feel like he's all giggly and shit.

Oh an he definitely was the first time you pulled this from your hat of tricks.

Almost a little to giggly i'd sat, to think the ruler of hell would be this flustered over an article of clothing is beyond me

But once he starts to become use to it. He starts to expect it. What? He is the king of Hell after all.

And he truly expects to be treated like one. (He's a brat when he doesn't get attention)

Be it sinner, hell-born, or even the 'perfect OC/that everyone loves who is half angel half devil/stronger then god/etc' he's gonna ask you one thing constantly...

"Please, my angel of death? Just one time, for me? Then i'll never ask again. Promise."

"I'm not wearing a duck tail while you fuck me. When- Where in hell did you even get these made?" you asked as you held up the pair of yellow lingerie with a duck tail sown on the back of the waist band.

"You shouldn't need to worry about that, my love. All you need to worry about is wearing them for me." He said with a light sigh and a shrug of his shoulders, a soft smile resting on his face.

"Again, I am not. fucking. wearing. them, you prick-!" As soon as you got the name out you felt yourself against the wall. The soft smile gone from Lucifer's face as a dark look pooled in his eyes, an unsettling stare never leaving yours. Before you could apologize, his hand wrapped around throat, his index finger pushed your face up to his as he spoke with a low voice.

Almost like that cheery devil was just a front...

"Oh, how far from grace you have fallen, my dear. Seems you already forgotten your god. But that's no trouble at all, for tonight..." His grip on your neck got tighter as he got closer to your ear and a sinister smile made itself at home upon his pale face. Y'know, you really only notice how big he is when he gets like this... oh that wasn't a complaint. Not when his presence alone encaged you against the wall, let alone the possessive grip that he had on you.

"I'll teach you how to praise my name once again."

Alastor 𐂂...

C/W: Teasing, sadly abo mention, WHY ARE YOU BOOING ME I AM RIGHT, blood mentions, possessive behaviors, light choking, mentions of cannabalism, duh, playing more into the abo, uhm, sniffing? idfk leave me alone its late. oh ft: a guest at the end.

Another man with class, just not as much. I mean, come on, he's still a sinner~

though when you present yourself to him in your outfit, he can't help, but raise a brow as he tried to keep down his smile at the sight.

Definitely a big tease, a BIG tease

Especially when you look so cute for him, squirming under his indifferent gaze. Oh how he wants to squeeze your cheeks and leave you begging for release~

He's also one for a game of cat and mouse.

so when you go out into town with him make sure to slip his favorite pair of lingerie under your clothes

And if you're one wear revealing clothes, then I hope you're ready for a possessive (and bloody) overlord, ad pray for anyone who thinks they can touch you, let alone come near you.

oh AND OHHHH wanna know how you really got him? How you really got to him??? When the static cuts out and that Louisiana drawl' comes out of him. (I would die. again.)

(If I say he has a rut would that be considered A/b/o? I mean he is a deer demon, same with other demons in a similar case)

but WHOOO WEE

for someone who normally has a distaste for touch that isn't initiated by him, He'll enjoy a night or two (on the rare occasion) where he lets you indulge yourself

though, do be careful now, he's a gentleman up and foremost, but he's not always a patient man at that. He's always willing to return the favor tenfold~

And if you already couldn't tell, he loves the color red, basically lives in it. So it's safe to it sets something off in him

be the cannibal in him, or maybe he just likes the color a little too much

but at the end of it you'll more marked up then a rough draft <3

"Bless your heart, Dear. Did you think I wouldn't notice... your little getup? His clawed fingers trailed your sides as he leaned down to whisper in your ear. His frame trapping you in your seat and god, would it be terrifying for any mere sinner in this position, if it wasn't for the playful twitch of his ear that told you otherwise. Someone was enjoying this more then he let on...

It wasn't the first time you had teased him in public, but it was the first time people really had the courage to come talk to you. To give the poor souls benefit of the doubt, you were just sat at the bar talking to husk. Though, you would also think the red pinstripe outfit and microphone that rested at your side gave itself away.

"And it seems i'm not the only one. Now, if I were to kill everyone in this god forsaken hotel. Whose fault would that be, hm?" A clawed hand made it's way around your throat as it softly pulled you back, letting him have full access to your neck. Burying his face in your neck, he took in a deep breathe as static radiated off him.

"Or maybe I should have you for a meal tonight. You do smell quite... appetizing, my darling. Such a shame I have to ruin that pretty little outfit of yours." Before you could even gasp a grumbling and angry voice rang out, bringing you both back into reality.

"Can you two not fuck at my bar please? You are just as bad as that damn spider."

"Oh of course Husker! We'll get out of your fur right now actually! Wasn't like these pathetic things were going to get a taste of you anyways."

[gilverrwrites]

Can you write some more Captain boomerang, fluff head cannons I loved your last one, and really would love some more 🥺🥺🥺

Abso-friggin-loutly! Fluffy/domestic HCs P2 [P1 Here]

CWs: Jealousy, guilt tripping. None graphic mentions of unrination. Rating: General

On days off from work (I use the term work, lightly) he is such a lazy git. He’s lounging on your couch in nothing but his undies and socks, both of which are ridden with holes and thoroughly stained ‘but they’re still good tho, here, have a whiff of that’ drinking beer and watching mindless action films or guilty pleasure sit-coms. 

If you join him, he will happily spend the whole day there, unmoving until one of you has to eat or pee. 

I hope you like physical touch because he will not keep his hand off you the whole time either. Playing with your hair, stroking your skin, sneakily trying to tickle you in order to force you into a more provocative position. 

He also loves to be touched in return. Likes it when you trace your fingers over his tattoos, play with his hair. Scratch his scalp and he’ll start twitching his leg like a dog when you hit just the right spot. 

Use a pen to play dot-to-dot with his freckles and he’ll get the result tattooed permanently.

Absolutely hates doing chores, and will try just about any underhanded tactic to get out of them. 

Oh sorry, love, I forgot. I know you did ‘em yesterday, and the day before that, but I swear if you do them tonight we can do that thing you like. But you’re just soooo much better at it than I am, I always do it wrong.

No weaponised incompetence, I swear down if he fucks it up, it's because he genuinely is that dumb/has never been shown how to do it. 

Claims to be outdoorsy, but if you ever take him camping or hiking he will complain the whole time that his feet hurt (because he’s wearing inappropriate footwear) and there’s dirt on his (already filthy) coat. 

He would never admit it but he’s more reliant on his creature comforts than he lets on. 

Does, however, genuinely enjoy playing sports together, mainly footie or frisbee boomerangs. 

Can say some pretty nasty stuff during an argument. He will almost instantly regret it but is too stubborn to be the first one to apologise. Instead, he’ll do everything but say sorry until you say it first or you come to an unspoken agreement that you’ve both moved past it. 

I did the dishes, an’ I went down to that food place you like and bought back dinner. Come on babe, don’t be like that, you can’t stay mad at this face, I know ya’ can’t.

Is very much the petty jealous type, doesn’t mind you having friends/being close with people, but takes it as a personal insult when you compliment them.

Funniest person you know, I thought I was the funniest bloke you know, remember that time I made you laugh so hard your drink came out of yer nose?

I’ve got a shirt like that, you never say I look good in it. Yes, I did, I said… Oh, well I don’t remember that.

But when the shoe is on the other foot, he’s such a hypocrite, he loves it when you get jealous. Especially if he’s still stinging from his own envy, he will actively try to make you jealous. 

Loves kissing you, all the time. Got his arms wrapped around you while you’re trying to get stuff done, planting kisses up and down your neck, on any piece of skin he can reach. 

You’re not allowed to go to a different room without giving him a quick kiss before you go. Even if he isn’t in either of the rooms. 

Oi, I’ve got a bone to pick with you, you left the bedroom to get a drink and you didn’t kiss me on your way. You weren’t in the bedroom or the kitchen. Yeah, and?

He’ll take whatever kisses he can get but his favourite are the sloppy ones, tongue halfway down your throat, saliva leaking, noisy kisses. 

Brags about you constantly. Every criminal, law enforcement officer, cashier, random lady at the bus stop way more about you than they ever should. Stories are often accompanied by many candid photos of you, photos you would cringe to see if he ever revealed them to you. Man wonders why he’s so easy to find by the law, when everyone from here to Sydney knows what you look like, what you do for a living, your favourite places to eat etc. 

He also keeps polaroid pictures of you, they’re always either loose in his pockets (cause he never carries a wallet) or pinned to the wall of whatever prison cell he’s locked up in. Many of which he’s drawn on. Some doodles are pornographic but most hearts, stars, halos, and speech bubbles with illegible writing that’s supposed to say things like ‘I love you Digger’ or ‘Miss you every day’.

He doesn’t really know how to convey it but he really does cherish you.  

[beelzebuddy-catan]

Obey Me Headcanons - Part 4

Mammon became luckier when the exchange program started. Not because of MC but because of Luke.

Satan is in an improv group but if you ask no he isn't.

Asmo gives people he's modelling with backhanded compliments to throw them off their game. Of course he'll look better but you can never be too sure. Right?

All of the brothers, except Satan sleep with lights on because they can't fall asleep in full darkness after living in the Celestial Realm.

Beel can't tie a tie. Satan tied his once and now he just loosens and tightens it.

Belphie can't tie his shoes. They're either Velcro, slip on, or untied.

He will never admit it.

Which is why he buys lace up shoes and just tells people he's too tired to tie them.

Levi wears heelies religiously and will just zoom out of the room when he's had enough.

Simeon pronounces lmao like LUH-Mayo but nobody will correct him.

Once in a fight when Satan was getting pissed™, MC turned to walk away and he said something under his breath.

MC spun around and slapped him.

It happened so fast he immediately snapped out of his rage fit from surprise and started laughing.

MC sells Mammon's stuff that he's forgotten about (you know he's got storage lockers full of things he doesn't even remember buying).

They save it for when he asks for money and pretends to loan it to him, know he won't pay them back.

MC has said "oh I thought you were the Avatar of ____, not the avatar of being a bitch ass" to at least one of the brothers.

Mammon was fucking around and chased some baby geese only for the mom to beat the shit out of him.

If Lilith had fallen with the brothers and become a demon, her sin would have been wrath.

Any being that can see ghosts/spirits can catch glimpses of her having violent reactions to coinciding with Satan's if he gets mad.

When MC drinks too much and needs someone to pick them up, they voice text Mammon asking for him to come.

Except half way through they always go: oh never mind Solomon just walked in. I'll just have a sleep over with him.

Mammon is ALWAYS there faster than a pizza delivery guy promising 20 minutes or less or a free pizza.

While Levi had his nickname long before Satan, it only really became commonplace when Satan was young because he couldn't pronounce the TH in leviathan.

Asmo can't French braid his hair, it always turns out as a Dutch braid.

Levi, however, is amazing at all different types of braids, so now he has to braid Asmo's hair

Diavolo thinks the funniest joke he's ever heard is the updog joke.

Mammon has gotten tricked into several multi level marketing scams.

He tries unsuccessfully to get his brothers to join each time.

Solomon started one just to mess with him.

It's the only time Mammon has been successful at it.

[im-notbean]

Headcannons of; Quackity x Greek! Male! Reader

On god bro. I just really want somebody who speaks Greek on the QSMP. So in orderto cure this fantasy of mine I have now created this, sorry if you dont like the fact that Y/N is greek but I had to do it. Sooner or later okay-

⚠︎ Warning ⚠︎

Swearing

Some cultural things you might not understand

Might not be accurate to the cannon QSMP

This post has both Q!Quackity and CC!Quackity

Grammar mistakes

Characters might be a bit off to you

Mentions of Homophobia

Author kinda pools info about greek food-

If anything bothers you from above please, don't read!

CC!Quackity

・Your accent>>>>>>

・I'm sorry but he just loves it, especially when you pronounce certain words.

・Like saying yogurt and bread shit like that you know?

・If you say Alex in greek he gets scared- (Άλεξ [Álex] might not be accurate lol)

・Praise. Him. In. Greek.

・He get's so mad if you don't, goes full on Mexican on your ass-

・Quackity definitely respects your boundaries, so he'd ok with you not wanting to be public about your guy's relationship

・Especially with Twitter and shit (I refuse to call Twitter "X")

・Makes the funniest jokes and yall know those corny ass pick up lines

・Like "I wish you were my Xbox, cause I wanna play you all~~ night ♡"

・He definitely does those daily

・He can't cook for shit, so you have banned him from the kitchen

・It's always akward explaning that to your parents...

・Quackity loves it when you cook for him

・Especially Greek deserts (I'm just gonna fanboy over greek food for a hot minutes)

・Like tiramisu or like those almond cookies

・OR FUCKING BAKLAVA

・OR EVEN LOUKOUMADES

・Incase you don't know what I'm fanboying over, Tiramisu is an Italian dish so I'm not gonna go over it in much detail

・Basically a layered desert with espresso innit

・Baklava is one of the MOST iconic Greek deserts, it's layered with phyllo pastery, melted butter, and nuts!

・The most common are pistachios and walnuts by the way and theirs a layer of cinnamon-orange syrup pored over it once it is baked!

・Loukoumades are the Greek version of fried dough, their normally topped with honey, cinnamon, and walnuts.

・Anyway...

・He loves then sm

・If yall decide to make your relationship public, he wants you to decide how to do it.

・I personally believe you take over his stream one day as his "Special Guest"

・A cooking stream because y'know- it's iconic

・Your baking a classic greek disk.

・Gyro (Pronouced Yee-ro by the way)

・Basically Gyro is a dish that is a mix of lamb and beef (sometimes chicken too) that is made to fill pita bread.

・The sauce that is paired with is called tzatziki (it's really fucking good.) it normally has tomatos and onions and paied with greek fries.

・So your cooking the meat and stuff and Quackity just comes up behind you and you turn around right cause you know he's their

・So quickly, you bend down and kiss him.

・A little smooch before you kick him out th kitchen-

Q!Quackity

・You guys met on the train to the island.

・He tried talking to you but he seriously could not understand you, it wasas if you were speaking another language.

・When the government had paired people up, you didn't get a partner :(

・You also didn't really want an egg either, but you didn't mind babysitting them!

・Phil is so greatful for this-

・Quackity had heard about your egg sitting and decided to leave Tillin (I think i butchered this ngl) in your care

・Tillin loved you, she also liked the fact that she could understand you and offered as a translator.

・When Quackity came back he was surprised to see his own child translating what you were saying

・Once the new members joined you were assined partners with Tubbo (I am not sure if the new members have assigned parners ngl so...also are we getting new members today?)

・(Not even joking- ANYWAY LMAO)

・So y'know how Tubbo can get info out of Curchuro (prob butchered that again lol)

・You can do it also, sence your the only person on the server who can speak greek and not English he thinks the info he tells you is safe.

・You get Tillin to translate to Tubbo about what Curchuro tells you >:D

・Quackity learns about this and then he realized what the fuck is happening

・The he realized one day, you were gone.

・Along with the eggs.

・He never realized how much he liked you until you left...

・Quackity tried looking for you and the eggs

・But he never got far

・Tubbo also tried to help look for you, to no avail

・Not gonna lie, you and Phil got locked in a cage togther 😂

[ac3-76]

Legend of korra headcannons🐌

warnings: brief mention of drinking(kinda alcoholism), other than that nothing

(Most of these are in a modern setting)

Wing Beifong is a motorcycle guy and posts Aushen Ride type videos

Varrick is a coffee addict and he has awful coffee breath

Korra got a stingray tattooed on her upper back. the tail goes down her spine and the wings(?) are on her shoulder blades

If Formula 1 is a thing in their universe, Future Indistries is one of the og teams

Asami would have future industries make a feminine car for the races taking place in Women's History Month (march)

And for the cars used by the drivers outside of March there'd be something feminine on it, like a lip stick kiss mark

She started it because she wanted a more feminine touch in the sport to show that you can be a girly girl or a girly person and still enjoy and partake in something that's traditionally masculine

I feel like in general she uses her cars to bring awareness to things occurring in society

When Bolin got paid for the Nuktuk series one of the first things he bought was a high quality gaming set up that he had his eye on for years

Now he streams him playing video games and makes a fair bit of money from it

Sometimes the others will play games with him and make apperances on his streams

the fan favorite is Asami because she has the best builds in Minecraft and the best strategy in Call of Duty

Mako likes to watch Criminal Minds and other law/criminal shows to see if he can figure out where it's going and solve it before the characters do

Wu photoshops everything that he posts and is very active on all social media platforms

when Korra went on her own for 6 months after Zaheer tried to kill her, she started drinking because it made her sleepy

she didn't have to be awake and deal with her hallucinations, and when she slept it was nothing, no dreams, no nightmares, just hours of being away from her trauma

being with Toph in the swamp for a couple of weeks(or days?) was the start of her recovery from becoming reliant on drinking to avoid dealing with trauma

Opal collects cool rocks and crystals she finds in the places she travels to

She gets them as gifts for her mother

Also because she's an Air bender and thus follows the air nomad life style, she's always sure to say thank you to the land for allowing her to give the rock to her mom

Huan has had his art in museums and has sold some pieces to well known rich people

He gives most of the money to charity

Mako sleeps on silk sheets only

he was fine with cotton and other cheaper materials until he became Wus bodyguard

Wu insisted he sleep on silk sheets after Mako told him that he had never slept on silk, and now Mako needs silk sheets

Korra's had the same black 21 oz hyddroflask since she was 15

she refuses to buy another waterbottle

it's also covered in stickers

Bolin got Pabu a bed that was specially made for Pabus size, weight, and measurements

Kinda like the one Princess Anneliese had for her cat, Serafina, in Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper

Korras favorite thing to do when she sees a book or something with words is to ask how much spice in it

She's at a restaurant with Asami, they just got the menu, Korra picks it up and displays the front cover to Asami before asking "Booktok girlys before I read this how much spice is in it?"

She thinks it's the funniest thing ever

Wei and Bolin stream and play video games together, Wei has very severe anger management issues when it comes to video games

Not punch a hole in the wall bad because Su got mad at him the one time he did punch the wall, so he's practiced restraint, but still pretty bad

Su has a wax warmer for the scented wax cube things in every room of her house

She makes sure the scent is changed every week, and it has to be the same scent throughout the whole house

Tenzin avoids using social media and most technologies, as do the air nomads and monks, but Kya did get Tenzin to allow her to make a social media account for the air nation

it's mostly run by Jinora and owned by Kya on Kyas phone

it's used to spread information about the air nation, their culture, beliefs, customs, history, etc.

Lin wears boxer briefs

Asami has endometriosis

Mako doesn't handle spicy food that we'll, which is odd considering he's a fire bender

Wei's really into photography and always has a compact camera on him

His favorite compact camera is his Panasonic Lumix TZ95

Wings not super into photography but knows his way around a camera because Wei has rambled on about cameras and angles to him so many times

Wing also has to take pictures for Weis Instagram so he's had training on how to use cameras from Wei

Korra goes through a lot of interest that last for a couple of months, one of those interest was wood working/carving

Korra made Jinora a wooden claw clip for her birthday once

it's the only claw clip Jinora has and she loves it

Makos biggest guilty pleasure is cross stitch and other embroidery styles, but mostly cross stitch

Bolins bed has an uncountable number of pillows on it

After Korra and Asami come back from their spirit world vacation, they decide to travel the world

They both only ever traveled for world saving business, and even then it was earth kingdom and water tribe areas only

So they spent the next year or two traveling the world to see it in a tourist way and not a fighting war way

[onetoomanyyy]

can you do a deep Namida analysis? you can include personal hcs i need her i need h < wants namida lore so bad orz

Namida. Naminami. Master Namida. Mida-Chan. The Girl From Planet Namik.

I’m much more of a headcanons guy than an analysis guy, so this will probably be more “headcanons slightly based on analysis” than the other way around, sorry 😵‍💫 (however, a little while ago fishhjuice did a compiling of all the canon namida facts)

Namida likes to present herself as the most orderly and put-together member of Squid Squad, but in actuality she’s probably the strangest one. She can be quiet around strangers, but once you get her talking you’ll never get her to stop. She knows all sorts of seemingly useless facts that somehow always manage to come in handy. She has insane spice tolerance and usually finds herself adding copious amounts of hot sauce to foods she thinks are too mellow. She likes photography and art, sometimes doodling her friends in her free time. Her lack of a complete eyemask is a mutation that she used to touch up with makeup, but later abandoned it after it started to become integral to her image. She’s willing to sing but is a bit embarrassed to, as she isn’t sure her singing voice is all that good.

Namida grew up fairly wealthy and her parents fostered her love for music at a young age, sending her to a music school where she learned piano and picked up some jazz theory. Later, she began to grow bored with the prim and proper lifestyle, and was the first member to join Squid Squad after becoming fast friends with Ichiya.

Namida is the emotional core of Squid Squad. Shes the best at talking to people and has a way with words that make it impossible to stay mad at her (even if she just did something that definitely warrants it). She’s also the most affectionate member and is responsible for the most group hugs.

Out of all her bandmates, Namida is closest with Ichiya. She was the first person he met after moving to Inkopolis, and he was pretty much the first really close friend she ever had. However, this closeness meant that during the final weeks of Sqdsqd’s lifespan, she tended to brush off how much of an ass Ichiya was being out of fear of damaging the band further. This did not turn out to be the right decision and she went on to feel a little guilty about it, wishing she could have done more. She puts up with a lot of his shit, but is willing to give him another chance come Front Roe. She’s a little worried about it all, but she has hope that it will work out. (go read my fic for more on that 😋😋😋) (shameless plug)

Namida and Murasaki are partners in crime, two chaotic-good bundles of energy. They’re pretty much the only duo who never had any ill will towards one another. The majority of Namida’s nicknames were coined by Murasaki. They lost contact with each other after the breakup but happily reunited later down the line. In Front Roe, Nami wishes that Murasaki wouldn’t be so dismissive of Ichiya nowadays, because that definitely isn’t going to fix anything. Wow, finally a pair that isn’t that complicated!

Namida always respected Ikkan for his musical prowess and considered him the funniest (even though he cracked jokes the least often). They would end up sharing the quietest moments together, making easy small talk and sometimes exchanging personal musings they wouldn’t share with the others. However, even Namida had concerns that some of his criticisms of the band were a bit too harsh, but they were all in good faith, right? So it wasn’t a big deal, right? She misses having someone to talk to where she didn’t feel a need to be the bigger person.

that’s all I’ve got for Namida! I really don’t draw her enough for how fun she is to draw. Thanks for the ask!!

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

In advance of Taskmaster season 18 starting, I found Andy Zaltzman's old episodes on a couple of Alex Horne podcasts, and listened to those. This sent me down a route of finding various Zaltzman appearances on podcasts, and I was reminded that there's an entire Zaltzman-hosted thing that's easy to find that I've never heard. It's his "Summer of Sport", which was a podcast he did for The Guardian throughout summer 2016, discussing the various sporting things happening. Rio Olympics, obviously. Also other stuff. I think there was cricket on.

It's weird that I've not listened to that before, and that it's not even something I think of if I think of Andy Zaltzman's career, even though I know Andy Zaltzman's career very well. I know Andy's pre-Bugle career because that's Chocolate Milk Gang stuff; I have studied that era in, probably, far too much detail. And anything he's done since The Bugle started, I know about it because I've heard it plugged on the podcast.

But Summer of Sport fell through a crack, as the John Oliver era of The Bugle ended in March 2016, and the reboot started in October 2016. This one little six-month window of Andy Zaltzman's career where I don't know what was going on, and he hosted a whole 12-episode podcast without me noticing. I mean, I was vaguely aware that it existed for some reason, but didn't really know what it was until I came across it this weekend.

So I picked a couple of episodes that had guests I wanted to hear from, and downloaded them. I think I'll end up listening to the whole thing, but I've started with that. And I'm not hugely proud to say I started with a Russell Howard episode because it had Russell Howard. It also had Steve Williams, a guy I know three things about: he's a Welsh stand-up, he appeared in that Comedians' Football video on YouTube (on the non-Avalon team... which might be why I know so little about him), and he wrote on Russell Howard's TV shows.

I will still be annoyingly quick to click on any podcast that has Chocolate Milk Gang person + Russell Howard, because they'll bring out the CMG-type humour that Russell Howard does sometimes, which I still quite enjoy.

It is odd that Russell Howard is still quite near the list of comedians whose voice I've spent the most hours listening to. 125 hours of the BBC 6 Music show with Jon Richardson, plus all his Mock the Week, plus every episode of Good News and nearly every one of The Russell Howard Hour (minus the last few, when I gave up on it after he started throwing in the alt-right stuff) - that adds up. It's all stuff I watched earlier in my time getting into Britcom though, a few years ago. Basically, Taskmaster was the first thing I watched, and Russell Howard was one of my very favourites on Taskmaster (I didn't even know when I first watched season 6 that he was one of the most famous ones, I just knew I found him the funniest and most interesting), so one of the first things I did after that was look up what else he'd done, and it turns out there's a lot. I watched all his stand-up DVDs before I got into most other people's stand-up, when I was mainly watching panel shows - so I quite liked those stand-up DVDs, but I'm pretty sure I was easily impressed by generic charm and would be less impressed if I re-watched them now.

He was also the first British comedian I saw in person, in early 2022 when my then-girlfriend got us tickets because she knew I liked British comedy and saw Russell Howard coming to town and she didn't know that I was mad at Russell Howard for bringing Jordan Peterson on his TV show, and I didn't tell her that because it was a nice gift so we went, and to be completely honest, we had a fantastic time. Did he have the best material in the world? I don't know, probably not? But he had some pretty good material and a lot of fun stage presence and the night felt exciting and electric I hadn't been to in-person comedy besides my local clubs before, and he was a lot of steps up from that (actually that's not quite true, I saw Trevor Noah in an arena in 2019, which was not great). He'd done a bit of local research and talked shit about the truckers who'd recently taken over our city and that got massive cheers from the crowd and then there was one moment when he muttered that even though they'd gone about it badly you had to admit they had a couple of good points, and I thought "Fucking hell Russell do not do this now, for the sake of the 125 hours I spent listening to you talk on the radio in 2007 when you were cool, please just be that guy tonight and don't fucking ruin this", and then he didn't, no more right-wing stuff, just impressions of family members that I probably enjoyed too much.

Russell Howard is actually back in my city this month, he's done one night here a couple of weeks from now. I have to admit I briefly considered getting tickets. I am curious as to what sort of material he's doing these days. Curious as to whether his comedy would hold up, in my eyes, now that I've seen a lot more stand-up (almost definitely not, but I'm curious). Curious as to whether he's turned around the right-ward political drift, or doubled down on it. Though ideally I'd like to find that out in a way where I don't give him money, in case it turns out to be the latter. And I have to admit... okay, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have bought a ticket anyway, but the thing that made me decide to definitely not buy a ticket is I remembered that I read somewhere he had a kid earlier this year. So the show will presumably be about that, and I don't want to hear that. Yesterday I watched John Kearns' The Varnishing Days and thought that was absolutely brilliant, earlier this year Anne Edmonds released her special Why Is My Bag All Wet and I found that hilarious, and a few months ago I heard Josie Long do an hour-long WIP that I loved. All three of those stand-up shows were about the comedians' kid(s), and it is so unlikely that I'm going to find four parenthood-based stand-up shows in one year that I like, given my general aversion to the topic. I realize it's not great that the threat of parenthood material put me off a show even more than the threat of right-wing material, but I just can't listen to another person tell me how tiring it is to raise a baby.

Anyway. I was trying to think, today, of why I keep being interested in hearing Russell Howard talk even though I know he's not that great, and it occurred to me today that of all the British comedians, Russell Howard's the one who's most like most people I know in real life. I've written lots before about which comedians' personas or material most remind me of myself, and of course I like those, everyone likes some relatable comedy. I almost never find Russell Howard relatable (except sometimes on Taskmaster, when the ruthlessly competitive side came out, which was what made me like him so much in the first place), but he does strongly remind me of so many people I know, just overall, in a broad variety of ways.

I've pointed out some of those individual ways before. I knew that part of why I got so drawn into that BBC 6 Music radio show is it reminded me of a couple of my own friendships that strained and/or disintegrated in the same ways as whatever the hell the Jon Richardson/Russell Howard relationship went through on live radio for a couple of years, with me being and OCD obsessive like Jon Richardson (not using the term in the annoyingly quirky colloquial way there, I've got a diagnosis and also have several disintegrated friendships to prove it is not just a fun quirk) and Russell Howard reminding me of some of my more carefree and easily distracted and sunny-dispositioned friends. Russell Howard's vague right-ward political drift is a pattern that I'm sure I'm one of many people who's seen it play out lots in real life from the last ten years, when you know someone who's otherwise cool and then suddenly they're telling you that actually, if you'd just stop and actually read Jordan Peterson's books and consider what he's saying, you'd realize he has some pretty interesting insights that could benefit us all. And you wonder if they've changed suddenly, or if they were always like that and you never really knew them. For comedians who are all desperately seeking ground that hasn't been covered 10,000 times for their material (yes, we all know that raising a baby is hard, we've heard it before), I think the "friend goes right-wing an you wonder if whether they've changed or whether you never really knew them" phenomenon happens far more often than it's been talked about; there's an area of life that's been disproportionately under-covered. Though it maybe it doesn't happen all that often to comedians, what with the liberal bubble and all. That mythical liberal bubble that sounds like such a lovely place to live. It must have happened to some comedians, though. The ones who hang out with Russell Howard, for a start.

Anyway, I found Russell Howard's ComCom episode absolutely fascinating, it's one of my favourite episodes of that podcast. He talks in ways I've rarely heard comedians talk, but that people I know talk all the time. He talked about destructive obsession with self-improvement, in a way that sounded more like an athlete than an artist. The type of athlete mentality that's the reason why so many people I know end up slipping down the Jordan Peterson rabbit hole. And approached several topics with the sort of shoulder chip and hard-headed attitude that I'd expect to see on my Facebook feed far more than on a podcast about an Art. I've spent many years as a nerd among athletes, and I find it interesting to listen to Russell Howard describe himself as sort of the opposite of that.

Anyway, absolutely none of that was the point of this post. I mean, I guess it's the point now, but I really did not sit down to write that stuff today. I sat down to write this because I wanted to say, I was picking out a few little episodes of Andy Zaltzman's summer of sport to listen to, and I was drawn to the Russell Howard one in spite of myself, because Russell Howard + Andy Zaltzman = Chocolate Milk Gang, and I was not disappointed on that front, as while they were discussing the diving event at the Rio Olympics, Russell Howard said something that is damn close to be exactly what I've written on my blog before:

I have described the Zaltzman/Oliver dynamic in those terms so many times, there's just no way to capture it without comparing it to a sport. Two people who were doing something so far outside the box that their stuff wouldn't fit with anyone except each other, and yet with each other, they're like teammates who are perfectly calibrated to know exactly where the other will go every time and therefore push each other to higher levels.

...That was the point of this post. I just wanted to share that audio clip and say "Look, some Chocolate Milk Gang discussion, and Russell Howard described Zaltzman/Oliver the same way I did." Not really sure what the point was of the several paragraphs ruminating on the nature/draw of Russell Howard up there. Just forget about those.

[lunarruled]

Which of your muses is the pickiest eater? Finn with his stuck-up ass lol

Do any of your muses have dietary allergies? Ky can't ingest silver of any kind or wolfsbane but I don't know if that fits as an allergy.

What is your process for creating a new muse? Sometimes I see a face and the character just comes to me or vice verse.

How do your decide on an FC for a new muse? I usually don't, it's like the cat distribution system, it just picks me lol

Which of your muses needs / wants a hug the most? Charlie definitely needs it the most. Kyle is the hugger of the family though.

Which of your muses has the most unique comfort food? Roman, he likes cold spaghetti with hot sauce on it.

Do any of your muses have issues remembering things? Charlie, he's been hit in the head a lot with some pretty heavy objects. But it's never anything really important!

Do you ship any of your muses with some of your others? Charlie used to have a thing for Ky, but she was never interested in him in that way.

Which of your muses tends to be the group “mom friend”? Kyle or Roman.

Have any of your muses ever experienced sleep paralysis? Charlie has and still does sometimes.

Which of your muses do you tend to have muse for the most? Always Kyleigh, she's my baby and my number one.

Which of your muses has the most unsteady sleep schedule? Kyleigh. She only sleeps about two hours a night at the most and can go a full twenty four hours without any sleep.

Which of your muses would you consider to be the best cook? Charlie or Kyle

Which of your muses second guesses themselves the most? Why? Kyleigh. She fully believes that nothing she does is ever good and she'll never amount to anything simply because of what she is and what she has to do in order to survive.

Do any of your muses have trouble falling asleep / staying asleep? Charlie

Which of your muses is most likely to walk into a sliding glass door? Charlie, then get mad that the door had the nerve to be there LMAO

Which of your muses do you think would be good friends if they met? Charlie, Roman, Jay, Juelz and Ky! Kyle is too much of a 'parent' to have any fun lol

Which of your muses has had the weirdest dream? What was it about? Roman. He had this one dream that he was on a giant mountain surrounded by clouds and he heard Sophie but couldn't see her. Someone was holding him back, he was in pain but couldn't figure out why. Then it all went dark.

Which of your muses has the funniest story from childhood? What is it? Kyle would say it was the day he was born.

Which of your muses would you trust LEAST with the ability to teleport? Jay. He is way too hyper and would probably teleport to Liam's all the time, leaving them both forever in trouble.

Which of your muses tends to get attached to people / things the fastest? Jay for sure

Which of your muses has / would have the most complicated coffee order? Finn because only the most pure and perfect coffee order can grace his body!

Which of your muses is most likely to believe in ghosts? Which is the least? Kyle since that creepy ghost kid visits his daughter. Seth doesn't believe in them which is weird considering he's a vampire.

Which of your muses would be most likely to survive a zombie apocalypse? Kyleigh and Charlie

Which of your muses has / would have the silliest ringtone? What would it be? Jay and it's Liam going: 'My dawg!' over and over lol

Which of your muses would be labelled “most likely to succeed” in a yearbook? Kyle actually was.

Which of your muses has the best / most attuned gut instinct? Do they listen to it? Kyle from taking care of all his children all of his life (Charlie in the past and Liam now) and he always listens to it!

Which of your muses has had the most character growth since you started writing them? Kyleigh, since I write her the most and have been for over half of my life. She started out so simple and straight to the point but now she's complicated, with multiple people that she cares for, a family and a really good life. @allxmadxdownxhere

[zhuwang194]

Gepard x reader “Loser”

I’m a loser, so either way, it’s fine if I just howl, right?

Being in the wanted post together with the called trailblazer isn’t a good sign, y/n is one of a famous thief of Belobog together with her friend Sampo, who she swear one day she will slap his face.

Now she is watching in a hidden place with Sampo the fight between Silvermane and the people not from this world.

“Hey Sampo, waiting to the right moment?” She asks her friend, who was preparing himself to act.

“Of course my lady, Sampo Koski never fail in his entrance in a show” He answers the girl, who was a little bit annoyed by his attitude.

“I swear one day I will kill you” Threat an angry y/n.

“Wow, a new way to say I love you right?” Teased Sampo knowing how she easily gets mad.

“Shut up and let do it” y/n after saying, picked her sword, prepared to take the foreign people out of the trouble.

When Gepard was going to make another move against the black hair boy, his attack was blocked by a sword.

“What a unfair battle, lot of silvermanes against 3 people” Say y/n with a playful tone.

“Who are you?” Asked the pick hair lady, tired after the battle.

“Call me y/n and… long time no see Geppie~” She looked at the blonde hair boy.

“Y/n, I wasn’t expecting you to appear” Say a surprised Gepard “You really should come with me and accept the judgment, you know, robbery is not allowed”.

“Shut up Gepard, you saying that is illegal robbery? What about the people from underworld?” She says with an obvious anger in her voice “you guys from overworld don’t even care about them”.

“I only did what the supreme guardian ordered” Answer Gepard.

“Listen to her, this bitch” Say y/n annoyed only my the mentioned supreme guardian.

“You really shouldn’t insult her y/n” Reply Gepard already a bit annoyed by y/n attitude.

“If you want to take the foreign visitors… only if I’m dead.” After saying that, y/n pointed the sword against Gepard “Sampo, take them out of here”

Already not expecting him to say, Sampo already acted by throwing his smoke bomb. And y/n being y/n, already making a move against Gepard, and he defended very well.

“As expected” she says with a no surprised tone of voice.

“You really thinks these little trick will work? How pathetic”

The fight between them was really fierce, y/n only attacking and Gepard defending.

“Such a loser, only attacking with help of tricks” Say Gepard.

“Says the Blonde Tartaglia” answer y/n while make another attack against him.

“Tartaglia what?”

“Nothing”

After a long battle, both of them are tired.

“Time to escape” y/n used a trick to make her disappear in the snow.

Gepard look at the place where she was.

He has many questions too in his mind, but he never has an answers for them, about some of the supreme guardian attitude.

In the night, y/n comes again in the overworld, but that time, only to appreciate the view of Belobog. She walks on the city, it was late, so nobody was on the streets.

“What a peace…” she thought herself, playing with the knife in her hand. “I wish that scene in the underworld too”.

Not long time after her walk, she hears someone singing, it was clear that the person don’t know how to sing, and being curious, she decided to spy the person. It was Gepard, trying to sing but failing.

“You sure don’t have talent to sing” Say y/n revealing herself from the dark.

“What the hell-’’ A surprised Gepard says, blushing really hard.

“Let call today a day of peace, we can be friends just tonight” Teased y/n.

“Is another of your tricks right?” Suspected Gepard.

“No no no, I’m honest, more than a friend of mine” She says. “Let’s help you with your singing skill darling”

“W-why are you calling me that?” Gepard was really flushed.

“Why not? Is normal calling someone darling, isn’t it?” Question y/n.

Gepard was blushing and y/n enjoying the moment. The funniest part is y/n making fun of him with the fact he told her, he can’t keep a plant alive, he can’t sing and he don’t know how to draw.

“So the wanted draw was made by you?” Say y/n still laughing at him.

“Hey! Don’t need to bully me like that”

“You are so funny to talk” She says, noticing some other people coming in the place they were. “Time to say goodbye Geppie”.

Before she leaves, she kiss his cheek, making him really embarrassed, you y/n kissed his cheek, how bold.

The story pretty sure don’t end here in their minds, but here in the post yes, is the end.

[tameodesza]

💍 Househusband AU: Headcanon 1

masterlist

a/n: Sadly, school, work, and moving has taken over my life. I’m still working on fics with whatever free time I have, but in the meantime, here’s some HC ideas I’ve been collecting (also, I need to clear up some space in my notes, 🫣)

 What do they like most about each other?

💍Shawn really appreciates Bret’s wisdom and patience with him. Admittedly so, he’s a bit of a himbo. Don’t get him wrong. He’s a smart guy, but there are moments where he questions how he even graduated college. But he loves that Bret doesn’t get annoyed with him or make fun of him. Just guides him or explains the situation to Shawn again with more clarity, such as:

“No, Shawn. You should not pour hot water on the windshield just because you don’t want to wait for it to defrost”

“Yes, Shawn. The car battery will keep dying if you keep leaving the lights on”

Or Bret’s favorite silly moment: “Bret, I can’t find my glasses!” “Shawn, it’s on top of your head” “….oh….well, how’d they get there?!”

💍Aside from Shawn’s beauty, Bret loves Shawn’s humor. Shawn’s pretty goofy, more so when he’s purposefully trying to make Bret laugh after a particularly bad day. Bret thinks he’s one of the funniest people he knows, aside from Owen of course.

What do they like the least about each other?

💍This was kind of hinted at in my last post, but Bret strongly dislikes Shawn’s drinking habits. It’s one of the reasons why he doesn’t like being gone too long from home. He sometimes asks his parents or one of his siblings to swing by the house to make sure Shawn’s not indulging too heavily without him there.

💍Shawn doesn’t think it’s a big deal. He knows his limits, but Bret’s seen him inebriated more times than he’d like. It’s one of many reason why Bret dislikes Shawn’s friends. He thinks they are enablers and a bad influence on Shawn

💍Bret also hate’s when Shawn turns down their plans so he can go hang out with Hunter, which is ironic given the amount of times Shawn’s chosen Bret over Hunter, but I digress

💍Shawn hates how stubborn Bret could be sometimes. He knew he could be bratty and stubborn himself, but Bret had him beat by a longshot, oftentimes not budging or not willing to compromise on something he feels strongly about

Who’s the better cook?

💍Shawn, hands down. He wasn’t much of a home cook when he lived in Texas. However, since marrying Bret and having more free time on his hands, he tests out a lot of different recipes with Bret in mind, hoping he can impress the older man with his mad cooking skills. He’s gotten so good over the years that he was sure he could give Julia Child a run for her money.

💍Bret would love to cook more, but he’s on the road too often to hone in on that skill. And Shawn usually kicks him out the kitchen anyway, so he doesn’t have many opportunities to learn.

💍To Bret’s credit, he knows how to make a mean turkey sandwich, and he’s really good at grilling meat (mainly because the grill is doing much of the cooking for him). Anything beyond that and scrambled eggs is beyond him

Common interests?

💍Gardening. It’s one of many random hobbies Shawn picked up while being home alone

💍After being on the road for a couple of months, Bret was surprised to come home and find bundles of daisies and tulips growing in the backyard.

💍During his short vacation from being on the road, he became Shawn’s little helper, carrying the fertilizer, handing Shawn gardening tools, helping Shawn pull up dead weeds. Anything Shawn needed

💍Then it just became something they did together all the time, sometimes Bret seeming more excited about the progress of their flower garden than Shawn

Bonding activities?

💍Aside from gardening, their favorite bonding activity consists of Bret testing out ring moves on Shawn

💍Although Shawn hadn’t wrestled in a while, last time being years ago with Hunter, he still was comfortable getting thrown around, though Bret tried his best not to be too rough because he didn’t want to hurt him

💍That was the least of Shawn’s concern, the blond man often finding himself getting turned on in the midst of the action

💍His favorite move was being in a headlock. He doesn’t know why, but it was something about being trapped between Bret’s chest and biceps that really did it for him 🥵

💍And yes, Bret thought he was weird for that, but Bret still loved him nonetheless

Random Character Quirks

💍Shawn is an avid gum chewer. It’s a nervous habit he picked up from college to help calm his nerves and it just kind of stuck. Bret noticed it a couple weeks into dating, but he doesn’t mind because it makes kissing Shawn all the better

💍Surprising to most, Shawn is actually a neat freak. He always notices if something is out of place. He’s constantly sprucing up the house – sweeping, mopping, dusting, rearranging furniture – especially when Bret’s away. Bret’s learned the hard way that its better to ask Shawn before he decides to move anything in the house

💍Shawn loves booping Bret’s nose because he thinks it’s cute. He does it randomly and Bret never sees it coming, but it never fails to put a smile on his face

💍Bret’s an avid note taker. More often than not, he carries a mini notepad or sticky note and pen, jotting down any ideas that come to mind. It’s more of a stream of consciousness type thing. Whether he’s at the grocery store and gets an idea for a wrestling angle or he’s traveling on the road and sees something he thinks Shawn may like, he’ll quickly make a note of it, afraid he’ll forget something important.

💍Shawn hates coffee with a passion. He doesn’t understand the appeal Bret sees in it. He’s ranted to Bret plenty of times that it tastes like poison, to which Bret brings up a good point that maybe it’s because Shawn didn’t use enough sugar. “Then it’ll taste like sweet poison!” was Shawn’s reply.

💍Shawn loves debating Bret on his “controversial” food takes: 

 Poutine’s not that great? Shawn thought it was a national treasure  and was jealous it wasn’t popular in the States. Bret should get his citizenship revoked for thinking otherwise.

Turkey bacon’s better than pork? Blasphemy. 

Oatmeal raisin cookies are better than chocolate chip? Get out.

Pouring milk before cereal? Are you ok?!

💍Shawn’s not that great of a driver. He’s not awful, but his road rage blinds his ability to make wise decisions. Bret’s had to clutch the armrest for dear life more than a few times due to Shawn’s speeding. Owen downright refuses to carpool if Shawn’s driving. The final straw was when Shawn nearly went on a high-speed chase after some guy who cut them off, threatening to track the man down, jump out the car, and I quote “give him a real country ass whoopin’.” For everyone’s sanity, and the safety of his fellow Canadians, Bret usually drives whenever he’s home or if Shawn’s traveling with him between house shows on the road

💍They both truly changed each other for the better. Shawn helped Bret come out of his shell, often encouraging the older man to engage in his goofy antics, Bret doing so willingly knowing he wouldn’t be judged for Shawn. If anything, the blond would judge Bret for not engaging in his crazy antics. Shawn attributes much of his growth and maturity as a person to Bret. Throughout his time of dating and being married to Bret, Shawn’s become more level headed, patient, less reckless, and thinks things through before he acts (except when it comes to his driving of course lol)

Bonus!

💍Bret refuses to attend another kliq Christmas party after seeing Hunter in a g-string. He didn’t mind seeing Shawn in the same getup of course. In fact, Bret and Shawn had to leave the party early that night 😏.

💍Bret also had the dishonor of taking a picture of both Shawn and Hunter in said g-string, which Shawn thought was hilarious

[agentnico]

Renfield (2023) Review

Finally we have a sequel to the 1988 masterpiece that is Vampire’s Kiss, that spawned generations worth of meme material and then some, and gave us a Nicolas Cage so unhinged, even for Nicolas Cage! It only took them 35 years, but now we get Cage as the actual vampire. Wonderful. As for those who haven’t seen Vampire’s Kiss - seek it out. It’s an amalgamation of weird, funny, silly, creepy and bat-shit (pardon the pun) crazy, and its about Cage THINKING he’s a vampire. It’s honestly amazing! Anyway, now let’s see him play an actual vamp.

Plot: Renfield, the tortured aide to his narcissistic boss, Dracula, is forced to procure his master's prey and do his every bidding. However, after centuries of servitude, he's ready to see if there's a life outside the shadow of the Prince of Darkness.

Those who know me are probably aware that I have a particular affinity to the man, the myth, the legend that is Nicolas Cage. I truly believe the man is great. With the way he uses German expressionism to deliver performances that to the casual viewer may seem over-the-top ridiculous and unnatural, but in reality is him giving it his absolute all deliver roles that are so unique and unlike anything else one has ever seen. I’m not simply talking about Vampire’s Kiss here. I mean, pick any film from his filmography - you have Face/Off, there’s Mandy, of course Con Air, The Rock...the list goes on. Even when he’s in a blatantly terrible movie such as The Wicker Man remake, he somehow comes out on top at the end with everyone loving him and quoting his lines endlessly. I mean, everyone knows the memorable scene where Cage is being tortured with a wire mesh helmet filled with bees, prompting his oft-parodied line, "Not the bees!" The man is great! He truly cares for the acting craft and is so shamelessly willing to go above and beyond in every role. 

Now the time has come for Nicolas Cage to take on a role that was a long time coming - Count Dracula. Look, I’m not going to waste your time here, Cage is fantastic as Dracula. He obviously steals the show by truly embodying the famous Bram Stoker creation. He is indeed over-acting 100%, but for this version of the character in a horror-action-comedy he is perfect. He’s everything I wanted from Nicolas Cage playing Dracula, and look, if you like Cage’s brand you will love him in this. If you don’t, then maybe just don’t go see Renfield. Easy choice there. But the way he uses mannerisms and maniacal facial movements in this movie make you truly enamoured and entertained whenever he’s on screen. A particular highlight moment is when Dracula visits Renfield in his studio apartment having caught him out on a lie, and his sarcastic delivery of every line is truly some of the funniest stuff I’ve seen all year, and I’ve watched Cocaine Bear! Also shout-out to the make-up department too, as the way the make Cage’s Dracula look in this movie, particularly in the earlier scenes when he is recovering from the burns of sunlight and you see the skin on his face half peeled off, that’s some great practical effects. 

So yes, Nicolas Cage is obviously Renfield’s main selling point. However the titular character himself is played by Nicholas Hoult who too is actually really well realised, with Hoult giving an adorably innocent character performance in his demeanour, all the while also managing to rip people’s heads and arms off left and right, yet still somehow being adorable whilst doing so? Yep, quite the paradox. Speaking of ripping off limbs, there is a hell of a lot of gore in this. I mean proper over the top comic violence where there are literally geysers of the red stuff splattering all over the screen. It’s as if Tarantino walked on set and was like “you guys may not have any feet shots, but boy are you gonna blast some blood!“ Honestly, it’s like Django Unchained all over again. Kind of felt a bit video-game like, with some anime tendencies due to all the madness. 

As for what I didn’t like. Awkwafina - I do apologise for those who are a fan of hers, but I just cannot warm to her in any of her roles. I find her super annoying, and not simply due to her voice, and in here she does the same shtick she always does. And in reality, her entire side-plot in this movie about being a cop fighting against corruption - why was that in the movie? Goodness, I’ve just reminded myself of that Key & Peele sketch about Gremlins 2 where Jordan Peele constantly says “THAT’S BRILLIANT, THAT’S IN THE MOVIE, DONE!!” But yes, all the scenes inn the police precinct felt like they were part of a different movie that had nothing to do with what was going on. All the stuff with Dracula and Renfield’s toxic relationship is great, however all the cop stuff was unneeded. 

Overall Renfield is a silly horror comedy that doesn’t take itself seriously, and simply gives us some stupid entertainment. I had a blast - Nic Cage is great, Nic Hoult was fun, the gore was mental, there were some hilarious moments of dialogue. Ben Schwartz AKA Jean Ralphio plays a mobster/spoiler son brat in this and has some of the funniest lines. Arguably Schwartz is even more over the top than Cage in this movie, and that’s saying something! Renfield is a great time at the movies, as long as you’re willing to embrace its goofy gothic style and lack of seriousness. And Nic Cage fans will have a hoot.

Overall score: 7/10

[unorthodox-oblivion]

Lost :P

Thank you for the ask @obsessivedaydreamer and @eponine119 who also asked for LOST

TV ASK TIME

Favorite episode and why

I don't really have one. It's always switching around between one of Kate's or one of Jack's or one of Sawyer's or one of Juliet's. I can't really pick one. But yeah, it's a switcharoo of one of those. They're some of my favorite characters and I like getting more character development for them, that's the main reason.

2. Funniest/crackiest/it’s-terrible-but-I-still-love-it episode/scene

Oh I love the scene with the glasses. Even seeing the gif on my feed gets me laughing and makes my days better. The disgust in Sawyer's face, the way Kate teases him, the tone Jack uses (that I can't even hear in the gifs, except in my head it's so clear), my god... lol

3. It’s-terrible-and-I-hate it episode/scene

To not go with Exposé, the Fire + Water episode. Ugh.

4. Best episode/scene for my favorite character

This is probably the hardest question, but either Tabula Rasa or Eggtown. At least right now. Ask again tomorrow and it might change lmao

5. Best episode/scene for my favorite ship

the scene where Kate catches Jack reading to Aaron and they make out after lol nah. I really, really like their first kiss. There's a lot to unpack there, but it had me squealing because I didn't see it coming.

6. Best episode/scene for a particular supporting character

Define supporting character lol

For Lost that's kind of hard, because a lot of the "main" cast feel like supporting characters more than main characters, even though the names of the cast pop up in alphabetic (last name) order to insinuate that they'd have roughly the same amount of relevance and screen time which is untrue since most of it falls to the A-team. And then sometimes I find myself thinking of some characters as supporting characters even though, technically, they're main characters. You know what I mean? ugh.

And I don't really like the characters that are ACTUAL supporting characters. But to go for like a side-side-side (more of a side, than a supporting really) character, I really like the post-rescue scene of Kate and Cassidy together talking about Sawyer.

7. Best episode/scene for a character I don’t usually like

Any scene between Sharon and Sayid. He made her character more interesting and more bearable for me.

8. Most visually beautiful or interesting episode/scene

Aside from that shot of Sun on the beach? lol God... the pilot. The pilot has incredible shots. Most of season 1 does, really, but the pilot is outstanding.

9. Most emotionally affecting episode/scene

Idk. I wasn't really... moved by any episodes (the friend that got me watching the show was so mad at me for actually being happy when a few people died lol) but... I guess the scene where Kate leaves Aaron behind, not because of the scene itself but because I couldn't help but picture the hell that kid would have to go through in the morning, even though she had told him who Carole was. She was still all he knew and the poor thing would be heartbroken.

10. Most powerful use of music in an episode/scene

Make your own kind of music as a season opener. Period.

11. Episode/scene that changed my perspective on the show

I don't think there was one other than the pilot. I watched the show cuz I made a trade with a friend. He would watch my comfort show, I would watch his. (I've done my part ¬¬) So I guess the pilot? I thought I was gonna hate it and I loved it and I couldn't stop watching the show.

12. Episode/scene where the acting stands out

Gosh, anything with Michael Emerson? His character frustrates me but he plays everything so well. There is so much subtlety to his acting that you notice especially on gifs or upon a rewatch.

13. Overall best-written episode

The Constant.

[softness-and-shattering]

Why is there an outfit of the absolute in a tollhouse room that seemingly hasnt been opened since the shadow curse? The room with the barred door, that you enter from above, with the super convenient secret door out to the street. Is it an error, or was the absolute around and into fashion 100 years prior? And how old is Halsin still?

So the beach fight was actually really fun, havent had that kind of a crowd control challenge before. I actually failed the first time round, only made it to round three. It took a wall of fire, multiple glyphs of warding and 2x turn undead. Discovered that the fire only lasts a couple rounds and then it turns to fire ground only which was bit weird? And then Wyll died walking over it for idk what reason, after ddciding to run through the wall earlier for some reason. Didnt save him in time and had to ressurect.

I respecced him as a paladin cause I struggle with warlock. He only has one channel oath charge at time? At level 8?? My usual team is my bard, karlach, astarion and shadowheart, and after the first attempt i swapped astarion for wyll, but he didnt do that much. Did smite sone wraiths, that was very useful, I just thought hed have nore turning undead, maybe more area of effect stuff. As it was, shadowheart and bard carried most of the battle and the others picked up the pieces. Necessary support. Idk I just expected more from Wyll I guess?

Super cool fight though. first wall of fire, glyph of warding, and guardian of faith. The guardian looked super cool, unfortunately disappeared the turn before it was needed, because I cast it pre-battle and the Halsin conversation took a few turns/wasnt in turn-based mode. I wonder if i started the conversation, switched to shadowheart in turn based, went back to the conversation if that would work.

Also tried the thing of throwing a healing potion at someone, it never works for me. It just destroys the potion, idk what im doing wrong.

And then shadowheart and karlach were silenced fighting the tollkeeper, for some reason it still thinks karlach is silenced even q long rest later. Ill see if thats still happening when I boot up my game again.

I really like the little area under the tollhouse basement. I wish there was more to explore there, but. Little secret romantic hideout. Who was down there anyway? During the shadow curse? They seemed peaceful. I dont mind skeletons as that kind of environmental story telling. I just find the piles of bones and stacks of shrouded corpses and random dismembered limbs to be no thank you.

I also didnt kill the devil so astarions big mad at me now. Offered my neck up but i forgot to check if its improved his opinion of me. Need my sneaky rogue man! I just dont at all like or trust Raphael. Creepy man. Offered me food that was definitely suspicious.

I started watching someone stream the game, totally new to dnd, so its interesting watching what they do and dont pick up on compared to like, eg I started off knowing to look for a dash option, and about spell slots, and im familiar at least passongly with a majority of spells and feats and things. It is starting to give me that experience of "no one understand my fave like I do", also looking on ao3 for karlach. Its a looot of "tall demon bondage mommy lady" and thats just not her personality at all, shes incredibly sweet and genuine and free spirited and also vulnerable and new to being around people she cares about, to trusting. Shes not a practised dominatrix. Maybe I should also look for lower rated fics and see what comes up too 😂.

Also the funniest thing happened in the tollhouse fight. I had asterion pickpocket the tollkeeper so he had her key. We're in combat, Karlach happens to run past the safe, I get the magic pockets pop up and suddenly Karlach is running on the attack encumbered! So I pull up the inventory, send the chest to camp, and she keeps running. All in six seconds! 😂😂

And I forgot to check what was in the chest!! Ill have to do that, lets be real, probably tomorrow. And then as long as there isnt more to do on the Thaniel quest immediately, on to moonrise towers! And a level up. Hopefully. Im eyeing it. Collecting fifth level spell scrolls, want to learn em already 👀. Gimme those cool spells!

(And the way you specify where you want the wall of fire to be? Very cool and well done).

[the-firebird69]

This b**** works at Walmart they've been sitting there complaining about him and Walmart's had enough of them we can see the people at Walmart writing notes get them the hell out of there. No they're not doing that so we're going to do it and we're going to take over and we're going to use this because we're going to start fighting this assholes ourselves we need them out they're horrible people they're trying to poison people and that's what they're saying don't have him take the poison out of Walmart you're saying so then take it out and we're going to use it on you starting now I'm going to have your husband poison your friends so they poison her back I'm going to use your stupid clans covered by eating them in my cage will turn into you and give me his team of killers killing all your buddies.. she got really mad and she said I've matured him for the last time that's correct now your brain is going to be swill. Turns around she's crying riding your bike home and she goes to a room and starts crying and fell asleep and she doesn't really care she's trying to do it for impression no she cares it's all over and she ruined it said how's my family be weaker than you it's not possible go to your Island and get the hell out of here

There are two Tina turners and it's a fat slob who's imitating her

Hera

Zues

And I thank you very much and yeah that's the fake one and it's really Lily and she went to her house turned into her and died and the movie is in Florida and we think the people grab her and it started there I've been trying to put it close and he doesn't really care if she's a fat slob. She's possessed okay and these guys are going to use her and what he says is I have all these people who won't shut the f****** and an evil some of them are close like Tommy f who gets his face cut off. She imitating my clan and you make it look like I'm not small even though I'm not really proud of the clan that makes a lot of sense and this jackass is doing it and say it is King Charles and my husband said that and he's so ashamed he can't stand it for years and it's really like keeping a character around she didn't do it on purpose but her name was saying is zoee it's not really true. And she comes back and in and out of the roll of Michael Myers and she comes back as the women in salt... I think we're going to go ahead and scary monster movie I mean they're doing Barbie and the reason is this scene comes up and he's like getting really powerful maybe 11 ft 12 ft is bulky and it's our son moves the car out of the way a little so the guys get out the ivory and they do it before he comes back out and the push it on vibrate it back and forth also it slides into traffic and one of those garbage trucks slams into it shoots it like a hockey puck down the street you're a loud crash

Right now it's a positive lesson and he's going to ask Dave to do it and to try and teach his people because they learn that way at least the sun got it right away nailed it if he has blue eyes and that's how damn it and you know what it is right out there did Mark out there and have him move the car and then you have your father moving and you show that the machine is doing it and it does all sorts of s*** cuz you can go pick it up after and they said they're going to stage it like you have to stage the whole street so Dan is going to do it and he says he gets out which is covered and it's covered for all sorts of stuff so they're going to go ahead and do it

It's one of the funniest scenes I've ever heard him come up with I'll tell you this kind of full of funny scenes.

It's all these people have to die because they're not fighting monsters at all or staying in them holding them off drinking against people who do I guess and that's going to happen but really we're rolling on movies and he's going forwards

She's got like 10 minutes ago and it's the person who took over team to turn his job

Thor Freya

He's going to eulogize her

Hera

I'm trying to grab me with the same ambulance and he tried to grab me this morning as I went to go to the policeman and it was Tommy f and Jason ran out there and she was gone already so the house is in the movie so it's going to be a fight I don't want to take a pay cut at first supplemented first and have other people do it like social security she's going to try it if they don't they're taking a beating cuz you can't see it once that other lady

Zues

I don't want to take a beating but this sucks you can't go anywhere and Garth wants to be the BF and he's a huge idiot with a big mouth

Corine

Olympus we approved this message to go out

[maybeitslove]

dream plays with kittens (while answering fan questions)

summary:

Buzzfeed presents The Kitten Interview ft. Dream

“George always calls me Dream unless he’s mad or something and says Clay.” Dream admits with a laugh, “But it catches me off guard every time, like oh shit he’s being serious now.” Realization hits him suddenly. “Oh- I just cursed, sorry! Is that allowed?” He looks over at the team of people behind the lights with an apologetic expression.

-

The Kitten Interview | Buzzfeed

Starring: Dream

We had fans submit questions they’ve wanted to ask Dream, and gave him a bunch of tiny kittens to play with.

-

Dream gasps in delight. “Oh my god, there are more?”

Another two kittens are handed to him, adding to the four milky white kittens already clambering about on the pink-covered floor around him. One is resting peacefully in his lap while he holds two in his hands, helping them climb up his chest and onto his shoulders.

“This one’s ready for a nap,” he laughs, using a pointer finger to pet the tiny cat on his thigh. “Lil’ sleepy guy.”

-

“Hey guys, it’s Dream here with Buzzfeed to answer some of your questions while hanging out with these sweet little kitties.” The camera zooms in on his hands playing with a particularly lively cat, before panning up to his face. He smiles at the lens before picking a slip of paper out of the jar they gave him and reading the first question out loud.

-

Question 1: Do you prefer cats or dogs?

“This feels like a catboy/dogboy question in disguise,” Dream admits with a laugh, silently damning his lack of filter. “I mean- I have a cat, Patches, and I definitely like cats a lot. Some dogs are cool, but generally, I think cats are just more chill and easy to live with.”

“I’ll leave the catboy/dogboy discourse to Twitter,” he decides. “Seems to be a popular topic of discussion over there.”

-

Question 2: How often do the crew boys hang out outside of recordings, and do you have a group chat?

“Wow, a double question. Uh- We hang out a lot outside of recordings and streams, usually just in calls for hours at a time where we all kind of come and go whenever. Bu- Oh!”

One kitten slides off his shoulder and into the hood of his hoodie, letting out a weak mewl as it falls in. Dream pauses mid-sentence, “Oh no! Let me get you out, baby cat. It just crawled into my hood,” he chuckles and reaches a hand behind his neck, retrieving the ball of fluff with one hand. “There we go,” he places it back in his lap along with the others.

“What was I saying again? Right- Yeah, we hang out all the time, and we definitely have a group chat. There are several, actually, but the funniest one is our iMessage group.”

“Can you share the name of the group chat?” The director, Hanna, asks, making him look up at her.

Dream feels himself blush, “Uhm, no I cannot.” He laughs nervously, adding, “That name is very not safe for work — or the internet.”

“Quackity came up with it, I’ll just say that.”

-

Question 3: What is your favorite content to make?

He stretches his legs out so all the kittens can gather in the space between them. “My favorite content to make has to be youtube videos.” Surprisingly sharp paws scratch on the side of his legs as the last cat struggles to get to where the others are now piling on top of each other. Dream helps it over.

“Youtube has been where my passion for content creation has been since the beginning,” he continues. “Especially longer videos like manhunts and challenges with Sapnap and George, because those are always so much fun to film — and edit.”

“Streaming can be fun sometimes ,” he hesitates. “But I mostly enjoy just popping into other people’s streams. And I know people want me to go live on Twitch more, trust me-” Dream looks directly into the camera, “-I see all your tweets, guys.”

He shrugs. “I think I just prefer videos where I can control what is shown and what isn’t if that makes sense.”

-

Question 4: Does everyone call you Dream or is it just your online name?

“My real name is Clay, but I feel like most people know that at this point,” Dream readjusts his hoodie a little. “My family and, like, closest friends call me by my real name, but I go by Dream most of the time.”

He helps a kitten crawl through his hoodie pocket, smiling as it peeks its head out of the other side.

“George always calls me Dream unless he’s mad or something and says Clay.” Dream admits with a laugh, “But it catches me off guard every time, like oh shit he’s being serious now .”

Realization hits him suddenly. “Oh- I just cursed, sorry! Is that allowed?” He looks over at the team of people behind the lights with an apologetic expression.

“We can bleep it out, don’t worry about it,“ one person reassures, clearly amused at his panicked tone.

Dream breathes out in relief, brushing an awkward hand through his hair. “That was a slip-up. I would never condone such atrocious language,” he jokes paired with a brief smirk into the camera, “never.”

-

Question 5: Do you have plans to release more music in the future, and would you collaborate on a song again with another artist?

He folds the paper together while he gives a cryptic response. “I constantly have cool projects going on, most of which are kept very hush-hush,” he puts a finger to his lips.

“But what I can say is: yes , there will be more music in the indefinite future.”

“As for collaborations-” Dream drags out the word before continuing. “I guess you’ll just have to wait and see.”

He smirks and picks out another question without sharing any more details. Twitter is going to have a field day with that teaser.

-

Question 6: What is your favorite memory with George?

“Favorite memory with George,” he ponders out loud, “I have to think about that one.”

“My absolute favorite by far is probably meeting him for the first time, which was like three weeks ago.”

The memory of their long first hug and the soft hellos that followed is forever engraved into his mind. A dull bite to his finger snaps him back to the colorful filming set.

“Apart from that, I’d say every kind of late-night call with him over the years has been very meaningful to me.”

“Aw, Dream,” a voice mumbles from behind the camera, just barely caught by the mic.

Dream looks to the right of the camera to where George is sitting criss-cross on the floor with a kitten of his own cradled in his arms. It has gray fur matching his hoodie and looks to be sound asleep.

Their eyes meet and the brunet sticks his tongue out, earning a scoff from Dream in return. “Shut up, George.” His tone is practically dripping with affection, but the fans are used to that.

“Oh yeah, George is sitting behind the camera just watching me like an idiot,” he explains to the lens pointed at him just a few feet away. “He just rolled his eyes at me,” Dream commentates. George shakes his head with a not-so-hidden smile, “Oh- and now he’s shaking his head.”

Everyone in the room laughs quietly at their antics, and Hanna says he can go on to the outro now. Dream nods and looks into the camera again.

“Those were the questions. Big thank you to Best Friends Animals Society who have kindly provided us with these absolute angels-” he gestures to the small kittens roaming around him “-for this interview today. They are an amazing animal rescue organization dedicated to finding a home for cats and puppies in need of one, and I urge you all greatly to check them out!”

“Thank you for watching! Byeee,” he smiles and waves goodbye to the camera.

-

“And cut! That’s a wrap everybody,” the director announces. “Great work and thank you for coming, Dream. You can chill here with the kitties however long you want,” she says kindly. “You too, of course, George.”

“Thank you, we’ll only stay for a minute or two.”

She gives a thumbs up and walks out of the studio along with the rest of the team, presumably to look over the footage, leaving Dream and George alone with the cats.

-

He beckons the brunet over to the rose-colored backdrop and watches him scoot over with the gray kitten safely on his arm. “You did amazing,” George says softly once they are sitting close enough for their legs to be pressing against each other.

Dream nudges their feet together, letting out a breath now that the cameras are off and he can finally relax. “You think so? I really liked it.” He leans in closer to pet the gray kitten. “It was probably a good idea to have this as my first interview, ‘cause now I’m not nervous at all for the next ones.”

George leans on his shoulder, watching him handle the little animals around them with care. “You’re a natural, Dream.”

-

read the fic on my ao3 here <3