#/ or southerners with family that aint WITH it.

[moonspower]

remember those writing guides ud see.......... i feel like writing one on the southern region cuz im tired of seeing ppl have southern muses and chalking it up to them saying Y'ALL and nothing else when down here we're very diverse. some parts, very small parts, have decoration day. which is kind of akin to japans obon where we decorate graves and have picnics and play games in said graveyard. eat poke sallet from poke weed which can kill u if not cooked properly. appalachian culture, etc etcetc. so many influences from french to irish even german. and african and indigenous.

also y'all is sooo expansive.... y'all'd've don died had you swam deeper in that lake.... y'all'd'nt had any damn luck in the lottery.... y'all'a been late for lunch had you come in 10 minutes later.... y'all'n gon and fucked up the plumbing, thanks.

[helloturtlebutter]

mostly just didn't know midwesterners said yall tbh, at least not like michigan, minnesota, wisconsin (settings of said fandom). Ofc Kansas, Missouri, etc would say yall absolutely. Love their versions actually. But the northern midwest up their next to canada? I just can't imagine them saying yall but I'd love to know if they do!

every time I'm reading a fanfic and a character in the USA picks up a torch, I know what they mean but also I have a minor moment of crisis because all I can imagine is

[xx0acidicorchid0xx]

some notes on wolverines (mustelidae) and Logan

cause new hyperfixation (its been goin on since a few weeks ago). gonna preface this by saying i have only seen the first x-men movie, and whatever else i found on tiktok n tumblr through my hyperfixation hoarding, so if anything is wrong or actually canon (or not canon) I'm sorry

notes under cut:

wolverines, while technically weasels, theyre the largest terrestrial weasel, and can weigh 26-50lbs.

Logan, is 5'3, but weighs at least 300lbs due to the admantium skeleton (195lbs without, meaning this small furry smelly man is just pure bulk)

wolverines are muscular n stocky and have thick fur (also waterproof n oily to prevent frost n such in them harsh canadian forests), are native to canada but can be found in similar environments, and are described as lil balls of violence and are extremely territorial around their food, family, and themselves (only out of necessity in order to survive the winter wastelands they live in). they also lack social skills and pack behavior like wolves

Logan, hairy beefy man, born in canada, described as an asshole, is violent n aggressive, but also severely traumatized. now with the fur, wolverines are nicknamed skunkcats because of how much they reek (they also mark whatever carcass they stole or found so nothing else can take it from em or where they buried it). if Logan (who canonically reeks) has waterproof n oily fur, it must be real difficult getting him to shower (not to mention he doesnt like getting wet) and also the water will not be able to get to his fucking skin because hes built to survive canadian woods.

wolverines are also commonly found in trees, as they use the height to locate prey and eventually pounce onto said prey

from some of the panel screenshots ive seen, Logan isnt unfamiliar with climbing onto trees

wolverines have been known to take on animals 3x their size, such as fuckin Moose, polar bears, elk n caribou, etc etc (only difference here between the mustelid and Logan is that there is no known attack on a human by a wolverine).

while wolverines have semi-retractable claws, Logan's claws are fully retractable. they (both the animal and Logan) have huge paws/hands, for the animal, its to prevent sinking into the snow

along with the thick waterproof fur and stocky build, theyre latin name gulo basically means glutton, so they have to eat a fuck load in order to maintain their body temp (usually they just eat their weight or very frequent small meals, but larger stuff is common), also theyre carnivorous but will eat anything they can find or kill, usually carcasses from avalanches n such, aka opportunity eaters

i have heard that Logan eats a shit ton, especially meat, but only large meals when alone, and small meals more frequently at the mansion. with the body heat thing, it must be super hard for him post-adamantium to keep his body temp at a normal range without literally sitting in the sun all day.

despite the aggressiveness they develop in the wild, when domesticated (which ive heard/read is super easy than you would think), they become very attached to one person, who usually is the trusted handler. they exhibit very cat-like behaviors, except wolverines actually like being picked up and wearing harnesses, they also like pets (but again, the trusted handler thing). they can become calm when hearing a high pitched obnoxious voice, and can go into a kind of trance when their gums are rubbed.

not sure about the cat behaviors n harnesses n other shit for Logan, but with the voice thing: Wade. thats all i really need to say about that

wolverines are naturally polygamous, but do come back to the female every so often to help raise the kits. theres a video of a wolverine male leaving out a moose leg near a female's den so she can have something for the kits to eat

this man gets passed around the x-men mansion like coleslaw at a southern get together dinner, aint no way hes monogamous. he does worry about the women he basically adopted and raised (rogue, laura, jubilee i think, yukio?,, i cant name any others but theres several)

wolverines also have the ability to smell a frozen carcass from over a mile away (and lemme tell ya, unless you have an excellent sense of smell, frozen anything doesnt have a smell except sharp)

this man can canonically smell emotions, and be able to tell the difference between Mystique and Storm just from smell Alone.

wolverines are very vocal, usually this kinda snarl/snort/growl/mumbling/chuff sound

not sure about comic Wolvie, but Hugh Jackman (and Logan, obviously) does snort n growl n roar n other shit like that

wolverines' mating rituals often include fighting multiple times, and mate Only after the female is confident in the male's fighting (males who return several times are more likely to mate than males who only fight once or twice) and that the female doesnt submit too easily. this is so the female and male can ensure the produced kits are strong enough to survive

self explanatory, minus the producing kits (that i know of)

also fun lil fact, wolverines' back molars are rotated at a 90 degree angle, so they can gnaw through bone easier (supposedly this is a common trait for mustelids)

not sure about sideways molars, but Logan does canonically have longer, more animalistic canines

most of my notes and how i worded some stuff is taken from wolverine expert Steve Kroschel, and tumblr user @/icarusredwings, as they have Amazing notes and headcanons on wolverines and Logan

[desswright29]

BACK THAT AZZ UP!!

A/n: A short story

You and Shuri sit in your shared bedroom, relaxing from a long trip. You all had just gotten in from a trip to Florida, where she finally met your family. To your surprise it went perfectly well. Great even! She mingled with your family perfectly. Asking questions, laughing, drinking, talking, and dancing. They loved her especially her swag. The girl cousins were swooning, and the boy cousins were impressed. She kept disappearing with the guys on occasion and spent most of the trip hanging out with them, which you found enduring. That is until today.

    Shuri sat body leaned back against the headboard, one leg straight the other bent casually with one hand resting behind her head. She was on her American phone with head phones on, scrolling through tik tok as you did the same. She looked good af (as usual) with her hair braided back, dark green silk pajamas on, the top completely unbuttoned showing her matching lace bralette and waist beads that held her strap. She continuously giggled at her phone, causing you to keep stealing glances loving the sound of her laugh and also the way her abs would contract with each laugh. She looks up at you and tucks her bottom lip between her teeth, her eyes lowered and she reached over slightly gripping your forearm. “Babyyy” She says voice low and seductive. “Hmm?” You say staring at your beautiful woman’s body in a trance. 

“I want some coochie” she says in her best southern accent. Your eyes snap up from her abs to her eyes as your mouth falls open in confusion. “You what?” 

“I want some coochie. Ain’t das how y’all say it in the souf.” She kept up with the southern accent that if it hadn’t been for her heavy African accent, might’ve been spot on. “Girl! What the fuck is going on?” You say stifling laughter. She smiles, lifting one of her brows. “You aint gon’ give me no coochie shawty? I know you want to. I seen you looking.” 

“Please stop!” you say finally breaking into laughter. She keeps up her act, standing on the bed looking down at you sedcuctively “Nah, I know how to make that pussy wet bae, imma dance fuh ya.”  

“What is happening! I gotta be in the twilight zone.”  You shake your head.

“Griot! Play “Back that Azz Up”  by Juvenille” 

“I just know she’s not.” The beat began to play and you had the biggest grin on your face as  Shuri moved to stand over top of you. She rocked from side to side. Her right hand coming up to the left side of her chest as she beat the rhythm into it. “You ready for this baby?” At this point you’re excited, so you yell “Give it to me baby!” As the beat drops, Shuri crosses her arm across her body pretending to grab ass as she thrust her hips to the beat over top of you.  

Girl you working with some ass yea you bad yea.

You bad yea.

“They said this is how to catch the ass when you throw it back at me.” You scream at the top of your lungs laughing. Tears welling up in your eyes. “OMG! Shuri I can’t breathe!” As funny as it was, Shuri was sexy af. You were tickled and turned on as she continued to give you Magic Mike realness. You hyped her up as you screamed the lyrics underneath her, and the hook began.

Girl you looks good 

Wont you back that Azz up

“YOU’S A FINE MUTHA FUCKA!” You say with your chest pointing at Shuri with two fingers. Shuri took her hands and flapped the fabric of her opened silk shirt behind her as she rolled her hips down in squat and began to pop her ass and rock side to side at the same time. 

“Call me BIG DADDY! When you back that Azz up” She sang along with the song. 

Shuri danced her ass off for you singing her favorite parts of the lyrics to you.

“You can do a trick yea on the dick yea”

“Them titties sittin’ right yea, I wanna bite yea. I could fuck you right yea, all night yea. Wanna bring it to my house yea, on the couch yea, knock the pussy out yea, get ‘em out yea!” She screamed! 

“Hand me the water babe!” She tells you and you reach to the night stand and get the bottle of water to hand to her. She takes it and begans to slowly pour it over her chest making it drip down her body as she did a body roll rubbing it in. You squeal in delight! Cheering your girlfriend on. 

As the song ended she collapsed on top of you as both of you went into a fit of laughter!

“These mutha fuckas don’ contaminated my baby! I knew better than to let you hang with them. They took you to a strip club didnt they!”You laugh. 

“Yes my love, but they didn’t have anything on you though sthandwa!”

“Oh I know that!” You bite your lip as she lay on your chest. “That shit was sexy though baby.” She looked up at you mirroring your expression. “Yea?” She says. “ Hell yea! Accent and all!” You lower your eyes. “You still want that coochie?” She smiles and sits up on her knees with a quickness. She grabs both of your legs and yanks pulling you down and then hovers over you. 

“I’m finna beat dat lil pussy up” she whispers. 

“Fuck me big daddy” you moan.

And that she did. 

A/n: Should I write the sex scene?

[mouthwashingdiscourseopinions]

okay no legit. why is jambalaya everybody's first thought like there aint a million other words that start with a J anyway. jambalaya is a dish that is pretty highly connected to the black south + specifically african-american origins. like i know why and you already said it but bro cmon yall. and then everybody goes "ummm its not that deep" like ive had to see ppl get clowned on in the other mw confessions blog for.

like. to you it might not be that deep bc youve never put thought into it but even if it's overall a nothingburger the fact that jambalaya became his unofficial nickname as an insult is kinda weird.

-> gonna use an emoji like. fuck idk uhhh 🏠

I’mma say this as a white bitch like I didn’t think much of it when Jimmy’s name was substituted with Jumbalaya as my family cooked jumbalayah and we were very close to black folks with my parents, aunties, uncles, and grandparents being raised or baby sat by black folks. I didn’t even associate it as a southern black dish until my upper teen years when I grew a brain. But literally calling Jimmy that + some other black reference / name makes it sound rrrrrracist.

[knivxsanddespair]

Day 5 - Noir

@roguegambitweek

It didn't take long for the hard-boiled southern detective, the best in mississippi and in town, Anna Marie to clue in what has happened. The crime scene was never a clear cut road at times. Friends and foes are never staying, always changing.

"Remy."

The figure turned around, his long coat danced to the wind's whim. "Mon petit chou-fluer. What brings you to New Orleans?"

"Shut it, Remy Lebeau." The country girl is in no mood for games. "Ah only need to hear some things from you."

"First you tell Remy to shut up, then it's time to talk? Mon Cheri, you drive a confusin bargain dere, no?"

"Y-Ya'll know what ah mean!" Anna spoke. "Ah just need answers. About the pile of bodies in the bayou."

Remy scratched his head, sighing. "A skirmish between the Theives and the Assasins. No spoilers on how that turned out, cher."

"Aaand, ya'll not in it? You are one of them Theives, are you not? A man of your word and honor?"

"Not anymore chere. Ah gave my honor to them because at first it be protectin our own, now it's been one killfest after the other. Gave my life and my honor, my years for something i thought was family."

"Ya'll opened your eyes now?" She blinked.

The Cajun smiled. "Hit a dead end in Remy's life. Remy had to change one way or the other, or else Remy gon end up like them."

The detective just grinned. "Ya'll aint as stupid as ya'll act."

"Life never is kind to the weak and to the fools."

"And what are you?"

Remy thinks about it. "A fool who survived, a fool who's learning, a fool who jus had his heart stolen. By a detective, no less. Remy's been a fool all his life, fooling others just go get some grub. But, Remy thinks you saw more than what ah let on, cher."

"Believe me. Ya'll aint slick, yer silver tounged devil."

"Has Remy Lebeau tempted Anna Marie at least?"

"He has. So shut your face and kiss me, Pretty cajun boy. Ah ain't letting you be alone. Not on mah watch."

[mythicalcowboyatheart]

SAVAGES

Warnings: smut that it basically

An: @alleennnnn the war is over I finally wrote a Johnny fic! Smut below the cut!

    »»———-►»»———-►»»———-►»»———-►

You were relevantly new to the small Texan town of Newt, you lived all alone in a small house the only other house closest was a farmhouse near the old slaughter house. All you knew about said farmhouse is your boss Drayton lives there with his family. Working at the gas station wasn't all that bad, not a lot of people came by, and if people did come by they usually were lost and or had car problems. Drayton was always so happy to help those folk, he would usualy have his nephew Johnny drive them somewhere you weren't quite sure ware they went but they never came back, and usually there would also be a fresh pot of chili to serve at the small gas station.

Johnny always peaked your interest for some reason, maybe it was his pretty face or maybe it was the way just his signature smirk could get you to blush.

Today at the store you noticed the lack of Drayton, you called out for him no answer, until you heard a deep southern voice come from the brake room. "He aint here, old man came down with a cold so I'm filling in for him." "Oh is he okay?" "He'll be fine," Johnny chuckled as he moved to the counter up front "he ain't that old yet." He chuckled again. You laugh "I know that but just checking to see if he was okay, anyway he say what he wants us to do today?" "Nah, jus wanted me to make sure you don't burn the place down." He smirks, "ha ha very funny!" You roll your eyes "well until a customer comes in imma go through some magazines." You say taking a seat in  the chair behind the counter. "Well while you do that imma go work on my truck" Johnny says walking out the front door.

Time skip broght to you by Johnnys assˏˋ°•*⁀➷

It had been bout an hour or two since Johnny and you had split off to do your own things. You had read through your magazine about ten times already. You let out a sigh as you got up from your seat and peaked out the window to see what Johnny was doing. You saw Johnny shirtless leaning over the front of his truck messing with something under the hood. You stare for maybe a moment too long as you notice Johnny starring back at you through the store window. You freeze knowing you've been caught checking him out. Johnny smirks putting the hood of the truck back down and taking his gloves walking back towards the gas station never once brakeing eye contact. 'oh fuck' you thought moving quickly back to your original spot. It didn't take Johnny long to get back to the station, when he re entered you looked at you. He come to the front of the counter and leaned against it starring straight at you the entire time. "Was you just checking me out doll?" You swallow the lump in your throat. "No I wasn't" Johnny's smirk some how gets bigger. "Well darlin I think the Texas heat is finally getting to ya cuz I know you was starring." Johnny let's out a chuckle. You look at the ground knowing you'd been caught. "There isn't no harm in starring doll." Johnny now says standing behind the counter now a foot away from you. "I like it when you stare." Johnny says leaning closer and whispering in your ear "how bout you show me what your pretty little mouth can do." You look up at him and see his face looks completely serious. "Come on doll we ain't got all day."

 Johnny says starting to unbuckle his belt and unbuttoning his jeans. You get the hint and kneel in front of him. He pulls his boxers down just enough to pull his already hard cock out. You look up at him again and he gives you a nod. You take him in your hand first pumping him afew times before teasing his tip with your tongue swirling it around his red head. You hear Johnny let out a groan as you take him deeper in your mouth, when you have all of his cock in your mouth you begin moving your head up and down. "Fuck" he groans grabbing a fist full of your hair pulling your mouth further on his cock causing you to gag. He pulls you back and pulling you back towrd him the more you gag the faster he fucks your face. You have tears and spit running down your face by the time he cums and when he does cum he moans out your name as he  just adds to the fluids running down on your face. "Jesus darling look at you! Who knew you were such a cock slut?" Johnny laughs re doing his pants and exiting the store once again leaveing you on the floor covered in spit,tears, sweat and now Johnny's spend... And god did you love it!

[intheholler]

I just found this blog and I love it already, I've lived in these mountains up and down the coast most of my life, from the southern part, but I can rarely talk about it offline. I live far north now where we get so many tourists like halfbacks you talked about posts a few months ago boosting the ego of local classism. But I still love everywhere I've ever lived, here and farther west for all the good reasons you talk about too. Your blog shows my Appalachian feelings great <3

hey family <3 welcome in.

i def know the feeling of not believing you can openly share ur love of our hills out in the real world.

saying anything positive about appalachia to someone who dont get it and/or aint from here... it comes with a heavy weight you're forced to lug into the conversation, and it can be exhausting to defend your heart when you just wanna express your love.

so i'm glad you're here with us, and sooo glad you resonate with the content shared here. thanks for being here <33

[tmnt-obsessed-ace]

Its 10:45pm time to yap about ANOTHER au (because I cannot be stopped)

So remember that untitled atla x tmnt 2012 au I came up with thats inspired by A Tale Of Spirits?

Well...it has a title now :)

"Before The Summer's End." (Look A Tale Of Spirits is already a really good title but I can't USE it because its already claimed and I've been wanting to yap about this au for so long and couldn't come up with an idea so SUE ME)

So basic premise, the turtles (including my own tmnt 2012 versions of Venus and Jennika because they are my beloveds and its my au I can do whatever I want, plus those two are not in fics often) all get transported to the alta world and separated from each other. (Again like A Tale Of Spirits but that fic has rooted itself into my brain and this au isnt gonna be a carbon copy so its cool)

So key differences from A Tale Of Spirits

Its tmnt 2012 (my beloveds) post season 4 (the turtles are all 20)

It includes Venus and Jennika

It begins at the end of season 1 episode 3 "The Southern Air Temple" unlike A Tale Of Spirits which starts at the beginning of season 2

So already pretty different

And for once Leo ISNT gonna be the main victim of my angst hammer. Its gonna be DONNIE (I have plans for him >:3)

So who exactly ends up with who?

Venus will be the first turtle introduced, landing in the Southern Air Temple and will meet Aang, Katara and Sokka straight away (Venus and Jennika will definitely get the most screentime since I am basically inserting characters that were never in tmnt 2012 and making them fit in with my favorite turtles because the two girlies definitely SHOULD'VE been there Im just saying)

Jennika will land on Kyoshi Island and will join the Gaang soon after they meet. (Girlie gonna have a field day)

Leo meanwhile will land in the ocean close to Prince Zuko's ship, close enough to warrant investigation. (Ok I know that Raph, Jennika, maybe even Mikey would've been better fits for Zuko but I didnt want to take the obvious route plus Zuko becomes "The Blue Spirit" wielding twin swords and later on calls himself "Lee" the joke was right there and I had to take it)

Raph lands in an Earth Kingdom town, very close to the estate of the Beifong family. (Yeah I loved the Raph Toph dynamic in A Tale Of Spirits, bite me)

Donnie ends up in the Northern Air Temple (he aint gonna STAY there because...I have plans for him. He's gonna learn the lesson Leo has already learned. Being the author's favorite is NOT a good thing :3. Donnie's gonna go through it that's all I'll say)

And Mikey is gonna land right in front of Princess Azula, in the heart of Fire Nation territory. (Purely because I am very tired of Mikey being treated as a "fragile weak innocent baby" by fanon. NO MIKEY CAN BE JUST AS DANGEROUS AS AZULA. Especially if he gets angry)

Its gonna be very fun, especially on multiple occasions that the kids need adult the turtles will realize that THEY are the adults

Hehehehe

("We need an adult...I am the adult")

Almost forgot to post the age order of the turtles oh my god I am tired

Ok so the age order from oldest to youngest is

Leo, Raph, Venus, Donnie, Jennika, Mikey

[superdummymags]

I'm gonna hit you with that 31, 21, 12, and 11.

31) thaaat's a tough oneee. i'm gonna say mt terajuma though? i love the vibes.

21) honestly! either Nimpossible Predicament or A Teila Fire and Ice. new terajuma is just really good i like it a lot

12) matthew changes the way his beard looks every once in a while just to make an 'inconsistency' joke to eizen

11) ( more under the cut because you just opened the floodgates sparkie )

so let's give a quick overview of all of them! let's start with the classic

Hephae Canestus! She's a mechanic at Xen with unhealthy loyalty issues. She likes to stare at people a lot, and she's got a fairly thick southern accent. She comes from Unova and got her love for automechanics from her father.

King Caliburn! He's a grunt in Bladestar who has a hyperfixation on crustaceans. His entire team is crustacean Pokemon, and he aspires to become a veterinarian for aquatic Pokemon- but he also can't stand the way GDC is run, so he's going to help put a stop to that first.

Lusca! King's best friend and boss. A Bladestar Admin who uses mollusk Pokemon, they were the reason King got into Bladestar in the first place. He's also studying to become a veterinarian.

Queen Caliburn! King's sister. A teacher at Axis High, she has no clue what's happened to her brother. She knows he's in Bladestar, but him telling her that went worse than poorly, so now they're out of contact- after the events at the ball, she's worried he died.

Eleanor! She's a "Destroyer of Aevium" - aka the people under Vitus who use wield eleki and drago. She's the owner of Regidrago! She's a very violent and angry person, having been raised to be an aggressive weapon by Vitus since she was a baby. She has a crush on Hazuki which unfortunately leads to her death in the Sanctuary.

Raiden! The other "Destroyer of Aevium", he wields Regieleki. He's the strong, silent type, and usually lets Eleanor speak for him. He's also Eleanor's impulse control- otherwise, these two would just be getting into constant fights. He can and will beat the shit out of you, though. He manages to live into the modern day, but he's no longer a Destroyer. He's busy traveling.

Nathaniel Goode! Not much to go over with him; he's basically Zeight's antivirus system while also being a virus himself. He also coincidentally looks like a Garufan programmer also named Nathan Goode. Why he does is unknown because trying to communicate with him is impossible ( he's too busy fixing the rendering engine )

whew okay breather time.

alright breather time over back to it-

Gale Suite! She's a part of a family of travelers that extend over the rebornverse for the fun of it- she lives in Aevium and helps one of her family members hunt down Zygarde Cells. We'll only go over one of the other Suites to keep things as brief as humanly possible...

Kim Suite! She's the eldest of the Suites and the scariest. She's got a perpetual smile and a shade always over her face- this is hiding the fact she's actually a 25% Zygarde. She's the one who gathers Cells- mostly Just In Case Something Happens. She tends to go between Reborn and Aevium.

Apho! Xen Mage who has a grudge against Hephae, for some reason. Regardless they're a very quiet person who also happens to be one of the creepiest people ever, constantly muttering about doing very violent things to people they don't like.

Ray and Yra! ( Yra's the one with the hat. ) Interceptor OCs based on the concept of making one different decision. Ray's paragon while Yra's renegade-- the turning point is the aftermath of Mt. Valor, where Yra decides to close herself off from everyone while Ray decides to help everyone get through it. Both are heavily committed to the Bit and tend to fail upwards in most battles.

aaand i think that's it! there might be a few i'm missing but theyyy probably dont have enough characterization for me to discuss or put here. sorry for the too long i aint reading all that post lmao

[thevampirediariesuniverse-1864]

Edward cullen x reader mate

Ur a new student at forks , you moved from your home town if some no where town in Alabama lol ,and it was your first day of school at forks ! You got dressed in jeans and a t shirt , you looked over your tall body 5”10 and your broad shoulders and hips and the soft squishy stomach you had , you walked out the door grabbing your brother saying “come on y/b/n, we need to go don’t wanna be late”

He said “okay Yn ,let’s go “ your brother was a year younger than you so he was in the 9th grade your a 10th grader this year . Once you two got to school you were greeted with curious on looks , I mean who wouldn’t want to stare at the chief of police’s redneck hillbilly kids .

Soon people ran up to you “ hi ! I’m mike ! It’s nice to meet you !” He said , “ oh hi I’m Yn and this is my brother y/b/n”. Mike said “ we’ll it’s nice to meet you ! Do you guys know how to get to your classes ?” You chuckled “ honestly ! Not a clue ! I could find you a giraffe on this compass but the class I’m supposed to be in …. But a chance “ mike started laughing …

That’s the first thing Edward noticed about you , you were funny , he overheard you conversation I mean your the new gir everyone’s a bit curious but when he chuckled to himself at your remark he turned to look at you … and it hit him like a time of bricks !! His mate !! He found his mate ! He looked at your you were tall … very nice he loved tall women! And your thighs!! Ughhhh he was salivating !! You were THIC !!! And that’s just how he liked his women !! Tall and thicc!

So naturally he followed you around that day , without any of your knowledge of course . The more he saw the more he loved ! How bubbly you were !! It’s like you had no filter you said what you thought at that exact moment , I mean you couldn’t help it ! And your accent was so cute !! All the y’all’s and aints and southern talking ! It’s was quirky and cute !! Just like you !

But somehow on the first day your brother made some enemies. And when break rolled around those jocks cornerd him and started beating on him ! He held he’s his own but there were 3 of them and one of him . Thankfully you came by and saw what was going on. Edward watching closely to protect you . You ran to your brother “ hey get the fuck away from my brother ! You bitch !! “ a look that Edward can only describe as death and as on your face. Grabbing one guys by the back of the shirt slamming him to the ground and got on top of him laying punch after punch.

The guys nose was bleeding and your brother finished off one leaving you and your brother against one jock . That boy hose straight for you but you swerve and mis the punch . Kicking him in the balls, you and your brother stare at tje 3 severely injured bitches that tried to beat you up . “ you fuck with my brother you fuck with me “ and with that you and your brother walked away .

Edward was in pure amazement at you . Your strength your loyalty your love ! He knew you were perfect ! And his . He couldn’t stop telling his family about how you beat those jerks up and how hot you were ! Rosalee already loved you because she heard how you beat up 3 guys ! Girl power ! Boss!! And so did emmet same reason but just because you were strong . Alice thought it’s was sweet if you to defend your family like that. Jasper was impressed as you reminded him of a warrior like himself .

Edward saw you walk in the lunchroom and almost lost his shit ! You had a black eye and bloody knuckles ! You were so fucking hot ! “ she is mine ! She is mine !!! “ edward though over and over again !! Rosalee said “ if you don’t ask her to sit with us I will !” She teased . Edward said “ yeah , good idea rose “

he got up and walked twords you “ hello yn , I was wondering if you would like to come sit with me and my family your brother too of course “ you looked over to your brother who nodded “ of course I would love to “ “ I’m edward by the way “ “ we’ll it’s nice yo meet you Edward I suspect we’ll be fast friends “. Edwards heart was racing .. well it would if it beat , but he could swear he could feel his heart racing his chest tightening love … that’s all he could explain it to be

At that you went and got a tray with your brother and came back to edwards table who pulled the chair out for you sliding it back in to when you sat down . “Thankyou Edward “ “ of course Yn … this is jasper rosalee emmet and Alice “ “it’s nice to meet you all” you said shyly , “ you too dear “ Rosalee said making you blush

You handed your tray to your brother , allowing him to eat it as you always did “ are you not going to eat anything Yn ?” Edward asked “well I’m not that hungry but y/b/n is and he is family “. Emmet mused you on “ family is that inportant to you “ you give him a cold look “ yes it is .. always and forever family above all a vow I swore many years ago “ edward knew he would become your family and one day you would say that about him

Rosalee said “ I like this one ! She’s a fighter ! She loyal and absolutely gorgeous!!! Like look at this woman !! She’s perfect ! “ you blushed so hard “ no please !! Look at yourself ! Your everything I’ve ever dreamed of being and more !! So pretty !!! Like you look like a Greek goddess “. She too blushed too ,Edward became jeleous of you two .

“ what do you enjoy Yn ?” Edward asks. “We’ll I like horse ridding art music and reading and writing “ Edward was really impressed with you “ wow that’s amazing yn “ edwards thiygys trailed away from the conversation as he thought about how he wished he could just take you in his lap and hold you petting you .

Lunch bell rang and you said your goodbyes . School eventually was out and it was of course raining . Because you and your brother had to walk home . But of course Edward came to the rescue ! “ yn , love would you like a ride home “ he asked and opened his passenger door of his Volvo “ my little passenger princess” he thought to himself with a smile “ ummm .. sure yeah it’s cold I have a new found will to live so I’ll take that ride “ edward laughed at that comment and said “ hop in “ edward took your school bag for you dropping it in the back for you and your brother got in also with the rest of the Cullens it was as full car

He drove and the car was full of laughter at your hilarious jokes or comments you were just bubbly and could make anyone laugh and fell completely comfortable ! And you truly loved everyone ! Jasper found it a bit strange how kind and loving you wer but soon saw it wasn’t just an act and you were truly on of the kindest people he’s ever met

You arrived at Charlie a house as Edward walked you to the door . “ I truly enjoyed your company today yn, I hope you eat with us tomorrow “. You smiled “ of course Edward ! I’d love to !” At that you walked in the house closing the door as Edward smiled .

That night Edward became restless at the thoughts of you so he just decided to go and watch you sleep . And so he did . He watched your large chest rise and fall your giant breasts moving . How he loved your body ! How he loved you !! He couldn’t resist and slowly crawled into bed cuddling into you just holding you as you slept protecting you

The next morning came you felt as though someone was watching you .. protecting you . You woke your brother for school to realize he was really sick so you cooked him soup and told him to drink plenty and just reheat the soup if he got hungry .

You set off to school . Arriving you were greeted by Edward who handed you a biscuit. “Picked this up for you while we were at the dinner this mornin thought you might be hungry “ you realized in the first bit this wasn’t a normal dinner biscuit it was a salted ham biscuit your grandparents called them a southern delecasy and no one else’s ate them it was a southern tradition and you couldn’t be more greatfull “ awww Edward !! THANKYOU so much !!! My grandparents made my these biscuits back in Alabama I haven’t had them is so long !!” Edward said “ of course ! It’s no trouble “. “ thankyou Edward really “ you said softly wrapping hi. In a soft hug . He quickly hugged back ! Tightly .

Sadly you had to go your separate ways . But you met up for break and ended up just laying In the grass talking and laughing as you played with his hands . He realized you were probably cold so he wrapped his jacket around you “ Thankyou Edward “ as you cuddled into him . He took in every moment and memorized it by heart .

But of course the bell rang and you had to return to class you tried to give Edward back his jacket but he refused “ no love it looks to good on you “

At the luch table edward asked if you wanted to leave and go somewhere for lunch you said yes and Edward walked you out to his car opening the door for you helping you in .

Lunch was amazing Edward was the perfect gentleman and treated you so nicely paying for the whole thing you went back to his car sitting there for a moment

you ended up in his lap and him stroking your hair as you fell asleep like a little kitten .. his little kitten

[muse-write]

6., 12., 10., 25., 18.

6. Are there any fics from others you reread all the time?

Yes! Similarly to books, I don’t want to reread things a lot in case I get tired of them and they lose their magic.

Some that I reread:

A Right Different Tale After All by hollersandholmes (there are over 50 works in this series and every one of them is worth a reread if you’ve read them all in order at least once)

Aint No Magic Aint No Lie by iguessimgonnamissthepantyraid. A great MCU AU in which Loki joins the Guardians and finds family and belonging. The second in a multi-part series.

everything i have ever learned by fialleril

10. Is there a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

A Secret or Two got WAY more traction that I expected it to, based on the smaller numbers of the previous works in the series. I still don’t really get why—I assume it’s because it’s tagged as Luke & Darth Vader? It’s just funny because the work directly before it has less than half the hits, probably because it features an OC (i guess?)

Also my 2 Howl’s Moving Castle fics have gone way better than I expected them to, especially for short things I wrote up in a few hours max. Hmc (book-centered) isn’t really a fandom i associate with a thriving fanfiction community, so it’s been surprising that I’ve gotten over 1k hits on each of them.

12. Do you have a playlist for your current WIP(s)? Share it!

Soo many…the one for The Council of Elessar is pretty long and the playlist has changed over time as my concept for the work has evolved, so I’ll list the songs that fit it best.

Dear Wormwood—The Oh Hellos

The Horror and the Wild—Amazing Devil

Exeunt—The Oh Hellos

The Old Ways—Loreena McKennitt

Neptune—Sleeping at Last

Southern—Sleeping at Last

White Leaves—Bear McCreary

Wave After Wave—Sleeping at Last

Piano Concerto No. 2 in F Major—Dmitri Shostakovich

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

I really like the dialogue I wrote for these great and noble deeds, particularly this exchange:

“I’m not a kid,” Walter protested. “I turned 19 the other day.”

“Yeah? Congrats. This how you always planned on celebrating?”

It makes much more sense in context (think D-Day, Omaha Beach, serious gut wound, the works). It was a challenge to keep to a different writing style and it was fun to write some banter.

I also like this line from what i have left behind i count now no loss: And then with that, the group became merry once more, and they filed through a forest lit with silver and gold lamps imitating the lost light of the Trees, and they came up through the trees to Nerdanel’s home, which would not be empty this night, nor any other.

25. Have you ever upset yourself with your own writing?

A few times—though not, I think, with anything I’ve written recently, and not with anything i’ve published to ao3. I don’t get extremely emotional with a lot of what I write—it happens sometimes, but mostly when I’m projecting something onto the characters or circumstances. It’s always memorable when I do, and it’s mostly happened with original works.

[sleepdeprivedsimp234]

New HC: some of the other southern states will tell really stupid and corny jokes to fluster Texas cuz they’re so stupid and he blushes purely out of second hand embarrassment.

=======================================================================

Georgia, walking up to Kentucky and Texas, who were both in the kitchen: Hey hey Ken- I got one for you

Kentucky and Tex under their breath: Oh no….

Georgia: The fitness trainer asked me what kind of squat I was doin’ today, and I said, "Diddly."

*Ken and Geo burst out laughing and Texas is just smiling like he’s contemplating on putting a gun barrel in his mouth*

Ken, still laughing his *$$ off: Get out cuz you aint doin’ diddly…. Squat.

*both start wheezing again*

Tex: *takes shot of whiskey and just slides down counter on to the floor holding his face in his hands cuz he’s blushing out second hand embarrassment*

Geo and Ken, running over two him trying to move his hands from his face: C’mon~ it was funny and you know it~

Tex, still contemplating on putting a gun barrel in his mouth: Omg shut up…. JUST SHOOT ME ALREADY-

Ken: Now why would we go and do that? It is WAY more fun to embarrass you.

Geo: Exactly.

Tex: I’m bouta kick y’all in the family jewels-

[creepling]

OKAY SO this isn't a request but i had a scenario i started thinking about last night when i tried to sleep that i wanted your opinion on (johnny on the brain always, unfortunately) and it's just... can you imagine being like, an honorary family friend of the sawyers (your grandparents were close with their grandparents back before times got hard and they had to resort to doing what they had to do, and now, while your folks are gone now and it's just you, drayton considers you off-limits out of respect for old grandpa) and you live a little bit far off from their farmland on your own dingy little farm. it's inherited from your parents, and it's... fucked up. you've got a lot of seeds, but nothing grows, and the house needs worked on and you just *don't* know the first thing about fixing any of it. you're, admittedly, pretty oblivious to what the sawyers do---you never come around without being invited and it's usually just a quick chat with drayton at the end of the road, and on the off chance you're driving your dad's beat up old truck close to their farm and hear any screaming you just think they have some really weird goats---but your visits are always short-lived and you haven't gotten to meet the new additions to the family yet. maybe you drive by to see drayton, drop off some seeds as a gift 'cause right now nothing's growing for you and they're just being wasted, and you mention something offhand about a rusty shed door that won't open or a leaky roof and drayton, after pulling him aside and giving him a very thorough talking to (you don't want to upset grandpa, after all, and your old folks WERE really good to them when they were living) about how he better not try anything, drayton sends johnny back with you to fix something as thanks for the seeds (because let's be honest, drayton doesn't have it in him anymore and johnny is arguably the most.. casual. able to act normal, if you will). so now you've got a sweaty, attractive greaser here to fix your roof that you've never met before. you feel bad about him having to do all the work because you're just so darn *clueless*, so you might as well make some lemonade and cut some watermelon so he can get a quick break from the heat! you keep sneaking glances and admittedly he's real charming, so it's not just the texas heat getting to you. maybe he thinks you're real sweet, if maybe a little oblivious. airheaded? whatever the word for it, you're certainly pretty amusing, and you're already pretty clearly off-limits for *killing*, but drayton never said anything about testing OTHER boundaries, now did he?

omg i love this sm. the fact that reader is normal because they never got brought up in some cannibal patriarch like the sawyers. but who knows, maybe the crops aint growing bc there’s family secrets buried in the soil?👀

also yard work johnny goes through my mind constant because he reminds me of the hot pool cleaners in movies or greaser mechanics. like i just know outside of killing this man is passed about made to do yard work and fix things up. drayton paps him off to fix cars and cut grass for extra cash or southern hospitality and johnny has to begrudgingly do it. but this time his client is hot and naive and fine to look at, so maybe he wants to stick around for a while. point out a leaked pipe so he can fix it and stay for longer, hnng

if you write you should defos make it into a fic, i’d read it in a heartbeat!!

[lorestory0]

i invented a recipe by accident

its weird it doesnt require much eggnog. danimals are good by themselves. juice is alright i guess. eggnog is pretty good. but for some reason making it without the eggnog tastes kinda bad? someone else gotta try this. am i weird or is the name i instantly came up with upon making it the first time actually fitting. i call it happiness potion because its so good. i just randomly did this at some point. the ability to make good food seems rare in my family yet this aint even the first time i just threw stuff together. i probably shared my recipe for a thing called imitato at some point..

i already had a reason to be annoyed that eggnog is seasonal now im even more bothered by it. how imma make my happiness potion without the eggnog. and howd i make something better than eggnog using very little eggnog mixed with stuff that dont taste as good as eggnog?

i dont know if other kinds of eggnog taste different than the kind i use. i use southern comfort non alcoholic

i tried it with carot juice and some other kind of juice imma put under the keep reading since i cant make the image stop being too big

so it works with carrot juice and fruit juice . tastes better with the fruit stuff than the carrots but the kind of juice, like the danimals, dont seem to matter too much which flavor is used.

people have on occasion mistaken my regular behavior as drunken behavior and i have taken it as a sign that it would probably be bad for me to actually drink alcohol. but does alcoholic eggnog taste different tho? im curious but not curious enough to actually try it

i discovered something funny while looking for juice

[youcantkillamutant]

Blind Landing: A. WINTERS - #1 - Matte Black Truck

Author: youcantkillamutant

Fandom: All For The Game (AFTG)

Pairing: Thea Muldani x Kevin Day

Summary: Hey hey my nosy little sleuths! E here! I know it’s been a minute since I’ve posted, but boy do I have a surprise for you! This is a new case outta Baltimore, and don't ask my why, but I have a feeling that this is going to turn out to be beyond juicy. So here's what we know...

Warnings: Depictions of violence, angst, mentions of death, eating disorders, slow burn (as is my custom), no smut (probably)

Rating: 18+

Words: 5K+

A/N: Look, I've been in this fandom for damn near a decade but apparently my third reread was the trigger that needed to be pulled for me to want to write in it. This is my first time writing in this fandom, so be nice. I'm writing about Thea, who I know some of y'all are weird about, so if you don’t like it don’t read it and all that jazz. Not Beta’d we die like men. I own nothing, all characters belong to Nora Sakavic.  

Read on AO3

Listening to Brutal by Olivia Rodrigo Chapter Trigger Warnings: violence, mentions of choking, hitting, knives, cutting, death

Blind Landing

/blīnd//ˈlandiNG/

In gymnastics, a blind landing is when a gymnast can’t see the ground as they land because they are inverted in the air.

___*___

Posted 6.30.2005

A. WINTERS - #1 - Matte Black Truck

Hey hey my nosy little sleuths! It’s been a minute since I’ve posted, I know I know, but y’all know better than to expect much of anything during playoffs. Not that much hockey was actually played, but that’s besides the point.  

Anyways, y’all know the drill, everything I say is alleged, this is my opinion and blah blah blah, BUT the most important and possibly most controversial thing is: this story ain’t set in the lovely southern United States.

Now I know you may be saying “Well aint that the whole point of the blog? I mean really E, you can’t call it the Southern Sleuths for nothing!” And to that I say, I do what I want! I never actually said I was gonna focus on Southern True Crime, that just kinda happened. And really, I have a feeling that this is going to turn out to be beyond juicy no matter where it all goes down. 

So here’s what we know. Anna Winters, a 17 year-old female was tragically killed in a hit and run last Saturday. My thoughts and prayers are with her family, but there are two interesting things here.

The First

Miss Winters was a gymnast. Nothing to scoff at if you’ve seen any gymnast do just about anything, but her skill is nothing compared to the girl she had been with earlier that night. Thea Muldani. Now if you aren’t clued into the gymnastics world, don’t worry, I wasn’t either, so let me tell you all the titles Miss Muldani has won:

2001

Women’s Level 8 Eastern Championships - 1st place in beam and all around

Icebreaker Invitational - 1st place in beam and floor

East Coast Classic - 1st place in beam

2002

Junior American Cup - 1st place in beam, 2nd in floor, 1st in all around

Women’s Level 9 Eastern Championships - 1st place in beam and all around

Icebreaker Invitational - 1st place in beam, 2nd in floor and all around

East Coast Classic - 1st place in beam, 2nd in floor and vault, 1st in all around

2003

Junior American Cup - 1st place in beam, floor and all around

Women’s Level 10 Eastern Championships - 1st place in beam and all around

East Coast Classic - 1st place in beam, floor and all around

2004

Junior American Cup - 1st place in beam, floor and all around

Women’s Level 11 Eastern Championships - 1st place in beam, 2nd in floor, 3rd in vault, 1st in all around

Junior International Invitational - 3rd place in beam and floor, 2nd all around.

2005

Junior American Cup - 1st place in beam, 2nd in floor, 1st in all around

Women’s Level 12 Eastern Championships - 1st place in beam and all around

Visa International Championships - 1st place in beam, floor, vault in all around

Junior International Championships - 1st place beam, 2nd floor and all around

[The photo shows Thea, in a blue leotard, mid flip in the air over a bright red floor. There are a few people on never bars behind her, and a vault just in front. The image of the other events are blurred. Thea is the focus.]

This girl is like the Dominique Dawes of her generation. Literally, a once in a lifetime athlete. I swear, all the kid knows how to do is win. She’s been practicing since she was 3 and competing since she was 6. Seriously, the girl is a machine. 

You’re probably saying “So what, she’s got impressive stats, where’s the mystery E?” And to that I say:

You’re being pretty pushy today, who pissed in your cornflakes?

I’m getting to it. I’d get to the point quicker if you would stop interrupting me. Lord. Anyways.

Thea Muldani is one of the most impressive teen athletes of her generation, maybe Kevin Day and Riko Moriyama or Sidney Crosby could come close to her reputation, but Exy and Hockey just aint the same as gymnastics… Anyways, word is she was arrested the night Miss Winters was killed. No one has heard from her since, and honestly, y’all know how I feel about cops and if I don’t see hide nor hair of the kid soon, I’ve got a few friends in the DMV who can kick up a fuss and make sure she’s alright.  

The Second

There were no plates on the the car that killed Miss Winters. It was a matte black truck, nondescript and insignificant, save for the fact that it didn’t have any plates. The only identifier on the truck at all was a sticker on the back bumper indicating the car had been bought from Koons automotive. 

Now, normally, no one would care about that, but Koons automotive is owned by Frankie Koons, who while being one of the most prolific automotive dealers in the state, is also known for his loud, messy and downright dangerous relationship with Lola Malcom. 

Anyone in the DMV knows all the stories about their torrid relationship. They’ve got plenty of mugshots between the two of them after their drunk and disorderly and assault charges. As far as I know, they’re still friendly. But I think the real story here is who Lola used to work for. 

You see, Lola Malcolm was essentially a nobody business major at Towson University until she met Nathan Wesninski, day trader extraordinaire. Nathan and Koons had already known each other for years and Nathan introduced the pair. And I know you’re thinking “who cares about a day trader setting up his friend and some chick?” But I’m telling y’all there’s something going on here. 

Nathan Wesninski went to jail  in 2002 for tax fraud, but that’s only because those are the only ones the feds could make stick. The real charges, the money laundering and trafficking and murder? They could never find enough evidence, could never find enough proof to prove that he was the Butcher of Baltimore. 

Isn’t it just a little suspicious that a car from the lot of a known associate of an accused murderer was seen on a murder scene? Like, just a little? I’m not saying that Koons or Malcolm did it, but it’s fucking weird. Unfortunately, that’s all the info we have right now, considering it’s an open investigation, but believe me, I am keeping my eyes and ears on this. 

Stay suspicious my lovelies! Until next time, 

-E

P.S. Don’t do anything stupid. If you can’t sleuth from afar, you shouldn’t be sleuthing at all

www.thesouthernsleuth.com

___*___

“Well it’s not my fault that her kip makes her look like a flailing idiot. She should have cleaned that up years ago.” I cackled at Winny’s tone, I couldn’t help it. I’ve known her for damn near my whole life, and she’s always been nice. The nicest of the three of us by a mile. I had no idea she was hiding teeth. Apparently all it took to strip that away was our first ever week of summer practice at Towson. I wish Willy was here to hear it.

The three of us had always planned to go to Towson together for college, and it was a given after the time we put in at the gym. I mean, you don’t become the top junior gymnasts in the country without blood, sweat and tears. The rankings never mattered much between the three of us, we were just happy to share the podium with each other. It was always a thrill to see our names in papers or pictures. T. Muldani, A. Winters, M. Anders. Everyone at the gym had called us the Three Musketeers and I’d campaigned (loudly) for a name change but the name stuck. It didn’t matter anyways, as long as we got to be together, that’s all that mattered, or, that’s what I thought. 

“And honestly, I think she’s afraid of the vault. I mean did you see her practically run into it like 6 times today?” We were on our way out of the gym, but I had to stop in the doorway to catch my breath. I haven’t laughed this much in ages.

“Winny,” I huffed another laugh. “Stop, stop, I can’t” I laughed at the annoyance on her face, lips pursed, eyes squinted, skin washed pale in the light of the streetlights. She huffed at the nickname and my request for her to stop her tirade, but couldn’t resist getting one more jab in. 

“Fine, but it’s not my fault she’s an idiot.” I snorted a laugh and agreed.

“Yeah, yeah. Are we going out to eat?” I’d left my car at the dorms, the walk to the gym was only 20 minutes and even though it was hot and muggy in Towson this time of the year, I hated getting gas even more. Not much would be open now as it was going on 11pm, but it wouldn’t be the first time I’d driven us around town looking for an open restaurant after night practice. 

“Eh…I’m kind of beat. Walk me to the dorms?” She held out her arm because she knew I’d wrap my arm around it, and then we were on our way. We kept up our usual chatter through the campus, slides slapping on the cobblestone and leos clinging to our sweaty skin. Anna got progressively quieter the closer we got to the dorms, which was weird. She’s been quieter since Mikky left, but when we’d walked in silence for a solid 5 minutes I stopped walking. Something was off. Anna hadn’t expected my stop, if the way her arm wrenched me forward as she continued walking was any indication. She looked back in askance. 

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing Donnie. I’m just tired. Ready for bed you know?”

“Is it Mik—” I stopped myself from using the nickname. She wasn’t one of us, not anymore. “Is it Mikayla? Did she…reach out?” I tried to keep my tone level. Mikayla left us both adrift when she quit the team three months before graduation. It was like losing a limb. Suddenly there were only two of us piling into the car for practice, only two of us grabbing dinner after, only two of us doing everything we could to patch the hole she left. 

“No.” Winny was quick to answer. “No. I haven’t heard from Mikayla since…” Since everything went down. I shook my head to rid myself of memories I’d rather forget. I knew Winny was hurting, especially after Mikayla had so viciously rejected her, but I’d lost her as a friend too. It still fucking hurt. Not that I’d bring it up to Winny when she was still nursing her wounds. 

“So if it’s not…her, then what’s going on?” 

“Nothing. Thea, seriously.” Winny’s shoulders were up to her ears, but I could see the pain on her face. I shouldn’t have brought Mikayla up. We’d been having a good night, our brutal private practice feeling good as it settled into my sore muscles, and I should have kept my mouth shut. Winny squeezed my hand, and I did my best to ignore the sadness in her eyes, after all, if I wanted to see that, I could look in a mirror. 

“Okay.” We resumed walking, silently this time. By the time the dorms were in view, the soreness I’d relished had shifted to stiffness. I was digging through my bag for my ID when Winny pulled me towards the parking lot. 

“I think I left something in your car.” She said it with a shrug, but it looked weird, because her shoulders were still scrunched up and tense. I should book her a massage or something with the PT’s at the gym. She was way too tense. Especially two weeks before our first meet. Still, I headed to the edge of the student lot with her. She was always leaving stuff in my car, her and Kayla. I was still finding stuff from Kayla every now and then. It hurt every time.

“What is it this time? Lip Gloss?” Winny scoffed and grabbed my hand as she pulled me along, threading her fingers through my own as we approached my car. Minty was the best hand-me-down a girl could ask for. It was the last thing I had of my mom that actually worked. Dad had kept the old, bright green VW Bug running all throughout my childhood so that when it was time for me to start driving, I had a piece of my mom watching over me every mile I went. It still smelled like her sometimes too. Usually in the winter, when I cranked the heat up and shivered in the drivers seat, I could smell her lavender, sage and smoke scent wafting through the vents. 

“Winny? What’d you forget?” I peeked in through the window, seeing the passenger side floor littered with cassettes and hair ties but nothing out of the ordinary. I turned my head to Winny for an answer, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was squeezing my hand half to death though. I shifted my keys in my hand.

“Winny?” I squeezed her hand back but it didn’t knock her out of whatever was going on. She was staring at the window, staring at my reflection in the window, and she looked…haunted? It’s not a look I’ve ever actually seen on her face, so I couldn’t be sure, but it was weird. 

She also hadn’t complained about me parking at the end of the lot. She knew why I did it by now, knew that it was safer to be under a streetlight and in view of security camera, but still, she always complained about it, because I’d been doing it since I started going places myself. I promised Dad I’d be safe, and this was a part of that. Why wasn’t she complaining about it? And why was she squeezing my hand so damn hard?

“I’m sorry Donnie.” Her words were a whisper, and if I hadn’t seen her lips moving in the reflection of the window I don’t think I would have known she’d said anything at all. Before I could respond, I heard noise. Sounds of hooting and hollering passing the dorm doors and coming closer to us. I rolled my eyes at them. Winny and I hadn’t spent much time around the other athletes on campus, preferring to stay in our own little bubble, but we’d heard plenty of their parties from the team house a few blocks over, and dodged many, many invitations. 

“I’m sorry Dani. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Winny was still whispering, still staring at my reflection in the window, but the group of guys grew closer and I couldn’t hear her very well. My heart started pounding at the words I saw her mouth. Apologies. She was apologizing to me. Why the fuck was she apologizing to me? 

“What are you talking about Winny? What’s wrong?”

“I’m sorry Donnie. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, but they said he’d kill me if I didn’t—” Winny’s explanation was cut off as the group of men began to surround us. I was wrong. These weren’t the student athletes we’d seen around campus. These weren’t anyone I’d ever seen before at all. 

I saw Winny’s breath catch more than I heard it. Her chest rising and hitching with breath in the reflection of the car. I squeezed her hand again andwhen she flicked her eyes up to mine, they were shining with tears. What the fuck is going on?

“Winny, what—”

“Hey ladies!” The men all looked to be around their 30’s. All looked to be too old to be out this late. All looked to be disturbingly excited to surround a pair of girls in a parking lot. In the time it took me to try and get an answer from Winny, the men had surrounded us. There were about 6 of them, but the man who spoke, the clear ringleader to whatever this was, smiled when I turned away from the car to face him. I took Winny with me, squeezing her hand for the last time and letting go as I repositioned my keys in my hand. Winny was shaking, but I knew what to do. 

My dad had grown up teaching me about firearms and self defense, but a few years ago he’d made me a deal. Learn how to defend myself hand-to-hand and with weapons, and I could go to Towson and live on campus all by myself. Up until then he’d been adamant that I would stay at home with him in Baltimore and commute to Towson when I had classes and practice. When Winny and Kayla and all talked about college, about Towson, we’d dreamed it’d be just like the movies. We’d live on campus, maybe rush a sorority and get bored of it halfway through, walk to the gym hand in hand, and we’d always be together. 

I’d badgered my dad for months about it, begging him to “be chill about it” and telling him I’d do anything as long as he let me live on campus with my “absolute best friends” because I’d “totally die if I couldn’t”. He came up with the deal, and for the last three years I’ve been training in Krav Maga. So when those six guys surrounded me and Winny, I didn’t have to think, I’d run through this simulation plenty of times before at the gym. I knew what to do. 

“It’s a little late for you to be walking around don’t you think?” I turned my attention to Winny, to see her before shit got crazy, and she stared back at me, haunted, tears illuminated by the light of the street lamp as they streamed down her cheeks. She was terrified. The guy was still monologuing, strolling closer to me casually, like he was enjoying scaring us. Like he wanted us to be afraid. Fuck him. I knew what to do.

“You never know what could happen in the dark.” The ringleader had meandered right into my face, hovering over me. I griped my keys tighter and put a hand on Winny’s arm. For this to work, She’d have to be fast, and if that meant pushing her to safety, I’d do it. I’ve already lost one friend, I’m not losing another. I knew what to do.

The guy peered down at me as he took in my clothes. A skintight leo and shorts that made me wish it was cold enough for sweatpants. He grinned as I took a small step backwards, relieved to feel the car at my back, something solid. Something grounding. 

“I’m gonna have fun with you, aren’t I?” I didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about, but we were out of time. I pushed Winny through the gap the ringleader had left and told her to run. She stumbled a bit but scrambled to catch herself. I’d seen her in practice, we had the same cardio routine, she’d make it. When I heard her feet pounding the ground in a steady rhythm, I could breathe again. 

“Are you even listening to me Princess? I said I can’t wait to carve you up.” There was a knife in his hands, glinting in the light and casting shadows on our chests. I knew what to do. I tightened the keys in my hand, rolled the other into a fist and listened, one more time, to Winny’s pounding feet. 

___*___

I woke up in a hospital bed, cuffed and dazed. I wasn’t actually sure I was awake. I couldn’t open my eyes. Everything hurt so badly that this had to be a nightmare. It couldn’t be real, pain like this couldn’t be real. 

So it wasn’t, and I slept again. 

___*___

I woke up again. This time, I could open my eyes. The light was bright, fluorescent and blinding. I closed my eyes again. Felt the pain again. Slept again. 

___*___

I woke up again, and I heard the beeping. It was incessant and sharp, and it wasn’t muffled by the sounds of people passing by the door or my breathing. It made my fingers twitch, but the sound of a chair creaking is what forced me to open my eyes again. The beeping got faster. 

There was a man standing up, walking towards me. He was wearing a uniform, something shiny on his chest. A cop. The beeping got faster, got louder. I couldn’t remember why I was here. Why I was cuffed. Why I was crying. The man stepped towards me. The beeping got faster. 

Rough hands pushed me against the side of the car and I braced myself. 

I screamed for help, voice rising higher in fear, then in rage. 

Bloody hands tried to hold me, and I kept kicking, I kept punching, I kept biting, I kept screaming. Anything to stay alive. Anything. Anything. Anything. 

“Miss Muldani? Can you hear me?”

Winny was gone. Safe. At least she would be safe. 

Calloused hands closed around my neck and squeezed. 

I wrenched my arms free. I scratched and felt the blood under my fingers. I screamed. Anything to stay alive. Anything. Anything. Anything. 

“Miss Muldani, I need you to calm down.” 

Only one left, one with a knife. One with anger heating his face. Spittle lining his mouth as he cursed me. 

I couldn’t feel the first cut. Or the second. It didn’t matter. 

Bones crunched under my foot. We both screamed, but I’m the only one that got up and stayed up. Anything to stay alive. Anything. Anything. Anything. 

“Miss Muldani, if you can’t calm yourself, we’ll have to sedate you again.”

___*___

The pain in my wrist is what really woke me. They’d cuffed me at a weird angle, and I was beginning to feel pins and needles. Forcing my eyes open was as difficult as I remember, and the light overhead was bright and white. I squinted against it for a bit, then I looked around. 

I was in a small room. The chair at the head of my bed was empty. No cops this time. There was a door to the left with glass panes on either side of it, showing a brightly lit hallway. There was a bathroom to my right, no door, just an open doorway with a curtain pushed to one side. I shuddered. I hate open doorways. And drawers. Anything open that could be closed. Ugh. 

There were two chairs to my right, but only one was empty. I guess I spoke too soon about no cops, because there was a man sitting in the chair closest to the head of my bed. I think he was a different guy than before, but I still felt hazy. It was getting difficult to hold onto memories. 

I tried to speak, but it felt like my mouth was full of cotton balls. I don’t know what sound I made, but cop looked up from the notebook he was scribbling in. The man was short and would have been stocky without the extra weight in his belly, with dark hair and beady eyes. I couldn’t see much more. Couldn’t really concentrate on much more. Why is there a cop in my hospital room? Why am I in the hospital?

The man didn’t say anything, but he held my gaze as he stood. He remained silent as he stalked around my bed, gaze darting between me and the heart monitor and the IV in my arm. The beeping of the heart monitor accelerated. This man was here for me, but he hadn’t said a thing. Hadn’t asked a single question. I tried to say something, anything, but there was static in my head. I couldn’t hear anything but my pulsing heartbeat and the crackle of numbness my brain provided. He reached for the drip hanging beside me. Flicked at my IV. I felt the motions as they tugged at my skin, wincing. 

Before he could actually touch me, before I could scream, the door to my room opened. My neck twinged with soreness as I turned more fully, or tried to. The person walked closer to me, and I could see they were a doctor. My heart rate decelerated, just a bit. I wasn’t a fan of doctors, but I knew she was the lesser of two evils. 

“Officer Murray. May I ask what you’re doing here?”

“I’m supposed to keep watch.” The cop’s voice was gruff, like he wasn’t used to speaking, or like smoked a pack a day. 

“Yes, and you were instructed to stay in that chair,” She pointed to a chair I hadn’t noticed by the door. “away from the patient.” It was subtle, but the doctor gave me her back, shielding me from the cop. My heart rate decelerated, just a bit, again. The cop huffed but the doctor stood her ground. 

“Now that she’s awake, I’ll need you to uncuff her.” The cop’s eyebrows rose to his, admittedly receding, hairline. 

“You’re kidding right? The bitch is dangerous.” I stiffened at his words, unsure if he was actually talking about me. 

“Miss Muldani is my patient, and for as long as she’s in my hospital, she will be treated with respect.” The doctor���s voice turned to ice, and I saw the man shaking his head even as he approached with a small key. 

“Your funeral.” 

His hands were rough as he removed the cuff, jerking my wrist out of it so hard I let out a cry in shock.

“That’s enough Officer Murray. You need to leave.” 

“I didn’t do—”

“Out. And please know I’ll be demanding that the chief sends someone more suitable for this when I’m through here. You can go.” The doctor walked the cop to the door, and closed it firmly. I saw her shoulders rise and fall, like she’d taken a deep breath, before she turned towards me with a soft smile. 

“Hi Miss Muldani, My name is Doctor Yen.” I opened my mouth to speak, but the only thing that came out was a squeak. She leaned down by my bed and seemed to be rummaging around in some drawer before popping back up with a water bottle and straw. She cracked open the seal of the bottle and I flinched at the sound. It was too familiar. She winced in sympathy while unwrapping the straw.

She plopped the straw into the bottle and held it up to me. I took a cautious sip. My neck throbbed, but the water felt good, so I took another sip closing my eyes against the pain as I swallowed. Dr. Yen pulled the bottle away from me after another few painful sips. I tried not to pout.

“How are you feeling?” 

“Everything hurts. What happened?” Dr. Yen looked surprised by my question. 

“Do you remember?” I tried to raise my shoulder in a shrug and hissed. Something tugged against the skin on my stomach, and maybe my back too. I couldn’t tell. There were images I’d dreamed. Nightmares. Or maybe…

“Maybe.” Dr. Yen nodded then gestured to my body. 

“I need to check on your injuries, is it alright for me to do that now?” I nearly nodded, but remembered the pain in my neck. 

“Yes,” I croaked. And then, “Where’s my Dad?” 

“He’s waiting outside. Talking with the police and your lawyer.” Dr. Yen’s voice was soothing and her hands were gentle, but whatever she was working on, whatever happened to me, hurt. My next words were a gasp as she pressed her hands into my thigh. 

“Lawyer?” 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause you pain.” She continued pressing on my skin, even more gently than before. “And yes. You fought five men that night. Two of them are in the ICU.” Five? There were six. Weren’t there?

“That night?” 

“Yes. You’ve been in a medically induced coma for 6 days.” The static was beginning to fill my head again. Buzzing numbness that trickled to my chest and down my limbs. I don’t know if I made a sound, I couldn’t feel it in my throat, but I must have done something. Dr. Yen flicked her eyes to mine. 

“Do you remember what happened?” I battled with the buzzing in my head, tried to hold onto the flickers of nightmares—no, memories that flashed by like a film reel. 

“I…I think. I know that there were six guys. Is Winny. Oh god. Is Winny okay?” Dr. Yen gave me a small smile as she leaned away from me and pulled off her exam gloves. 

“You should focus on healing. You’ve been through a lot.”

___*___

I don’t know how long I’d been sleeping, but when I woke up again, my dad was by my side, holding my right hand and brushing a soothing thumb over it. I squeezed on instinct, relief over something familiar felt like a balloon popping in my chest. 

“Dad?” 

“Thea? Sweetheart? Oh thank god. Thank god.” His grip on my hand tightened and I groaned in pain. I hurt so much everywhere, but I could only see the bandages on my hands and arms. There were more than I expected. 

“Dad, what happened?”

“Thea, sweetheart, how are you feeling?” His complete avoidance of my question had alarm bells ringing in my brain. The buzzing numbness was still there, dissipating in the wake of the fluorescent hospital lights, and I tried to blink away everything happening in my head. 

“Confused. Why won’t anyone tell me anything? What day is—” I stopped as I saw the balloons floating by the door. There was a big silver ’18’ that looked to be covered in confetti, and it was surrounded by a bundle of teal balloons that read ‘Happy Birthday Thea!’.

I missed my birthday. I missed my eighteenth birthday. If I’ve been in the hospital since that night…Then I’ve been here for weeks. 

“Happy Birthday kiddo?” 

“Today?” His smile dropped along with his shoulders. It was like a puppet having its strings cut. Dad was huge, even taller and bigger than Uncle David, and he’d always been the strongest person I knew. Now, with his hand in mine and his eyes shining as they catalogued every bit of me in this hospital bed, he looked small. I squeezed his hand. I still wanted to know what day it actually is.

“Yesterday.” He sighed and his shoulders dropped. “Dr. Yen says it’s good you’re resting. Means you’re healing.” Images of my nightmares burst in my head like camera flashes. I blinked them away. I didn’t care about healing. That didn’t matter. I needed to know about Winny. I needed to know that she was safe. That I kept her safe. 

“Where’s Winny?” Dad’s face dropped, and he looked so much older than I remembered. There was grey at his temples that I couldn’t have sworn hadn’t been there when I left for college. Lines on his forehead that creased as he studied my face. 

“She died. There was a car accident. After.” She died. She died. Died.

“What? That—No. I, I—” saved her. I tried to save her.

“Thea, I’m sorry.”

“When is the funeral?” No apologies would fix this. Nothing would bring her back, but I needed to see her. Before she was gone, I needed to see her. One last time. 

“Yesterday.” 

The balloons fluttered from the air vents pushing cool air into the room. ‘Happy Birthday’. The air moved the balloons again, and they made a soft squeaking noise as they rolled against each other. 

Happy Birthday. Anna would never have another birthday. She’d never have another day. She was gone. 

“Thea, honey.” Dad halted his words. He must have seen something on my face. There was nothing he could say. Not really. Not as I buried my birthday with my last memory of Winny. 

I’d tried to save her. Why couldn’t I save her?

__________________________________________________________

A/N: Okay so basically, I got really into the aftg social media AU’s and I read this one  by @ninyard (really amazing btw) and thought “wouldn’t aftg be interesting if there was a true crime blogger following the story as it unfolds? How insane would that get? Would they even figure out the yakuza involvement?”? Add in my inability to resist writing for the black characters in any fandom I’m in and bam! You get this…

Basically timeline wise this is gonna go pre-aftg all the way through to the end. It’s going to be mainly from Thea’s POV with maybe some Kevin sprinkled in (after my 4th reread I finally started feeling actual sympathy for him). I just think Thea’s interesting from the literal two lines we’ve gotten from her. She’s clearly deeply loyal and protective, *whispers into the mic* just like Andrew *I am forcibly removed from the stage* but I think it would be interesting to see how they interact when they’re on equal footing. As you can see, there’s no age gap here, mainly because it wouldn’t fit the story but also because I can’t be arsed. 

I am trained in Krav, I’m rusty now, but in my heyday, my old ass could do some damage, so I figure, Thea being a young athlete already, can handle six guys with minimal physical damage (maximum psychic damage tho, RIP). She’ll get worse before she gets better, but she’ll get better and then Kevin with show up with all the grace of a drunk elephant.

Big shout out to @andrewmsaidso for reading this and telling me I wasn't crazy for this!