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checkxmaster · 7 months ago

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"A skittish little bastard..." Chad repeated, an amused smirk coming to his face. After a moment he chuckled and admitted, "You're not wrong." But as she went on about the utter lack of camaraderie the clones seemed to have within their own teams, Chad's eyes widened with irritated agreement. "Yes! I noticed that too! God, it's like they could care less what anyone else around them is doing or why they're doing it. There's no syncing, no friendship, no empathy, no solidarity at all. I know you're supposed to stay focused in the field, but that's ridiculous."

Chad shrugged. "I never believed that emotion makes soldiers weaker. That's what I was always told, to keep your head in the game and your heart out of it, but I just don't work that way, and I don't think most soldiers do. I think emotion plays a big role in why you do what you do. If there's no vested interest, no drive, no sense of duty or justice or something... then why are you even a soldier in the first place? And if you can't trust your team with your life, if you don't care about their survival as much as your own, that makes the whole team weaker. I guess I always knew that, but seeing the concept play out right in front of me with those clones... it really makes you think there's something to it."

And that got him a little choked up. J.D. had trusted him with his life, and more than that, he trusted him to remember a simple goddamn elevator code. What had been his job, his purpose that night, if not things like that? And he failed miserably. He got all cracked up like Humpty Dumpty. It should've been me to get pulled into that elevator. I let him down. I let everyone down. Emotions don't make soldiers weaker, huh? Yours did. Chad cleared his throat and blinked several times to get rid of the tears that were starting to sting his eyes. Those thoughts always rose up so quickly the second he started thinking about that day, but considering how close Rain and J.D. had been, putting words to his feelings would do her more harm than good. That and he really didn't feel like getting beat up at the moment. He pinched the bridge of his nose, letting go of the invasive negative thoughts for now.

He was happy for Rain's question, because it got him thinking along totally different lines. "Yeah, it's... a long and stupid story," he said. "I wasn't even in Raccoon. You know I lived in the suburbs, right, I didn't dorm in the Hive? So... after I woke up on the train track, I badly injured but not infected. I guess the antivirus was still in my system from when Matt gave it to me on the train, and whatever that creature did to me didn't convey and further infection. I followed the track to the doors which... should've been sealed, since it was way after our deadline, but... they were wide open. Blood everywhere, steel torn open like it was nothing more than paper. I booked it outta there so fast and didn't look back. I stole one of a few SUVs that was just sitting outside the mansion, drove to my house, got some supplies, and went dark. I stayed in the area, but I didn't want Umbrella to know where I was. I motel-hopped, mostly. It was easily a couple months in between that night in the Hive and when the outbreak in Raccoon happened."

"But then one day, I saw Raccoon City on the news... and I just... my heart dropped. I knew exactly what was happening, and I made just about the dumbest decision ever... and drove back there. I figured I knew what to do, how to help people, how to stop it. I don't know, it was so stupid, but I thought I could help. I got back inside before they sealed off the city. There were uh... I ran into some R.P.D., S.T.A.R.S., and U.B.C.S. personnel there, but... geezus everybody was droppin' like flies. The way the whole city was overrun that night within hours was insane. I was able to jump on Umbrella's communication frequencies and knew what they were planning to do, so I started looking for other ways out of the city. We got out through the sewers, me and a group of others, but... there were nasty things in those sewers too. Not many made it out, and in the end, I guess it didn't really matter..."

Chad trailed off, feeling like his attempts at helping people failed, like they usually did. Instead of feeling good about trying, he only saw the ultimate failure. "After that, everything went to hell in a handbasket, and here we are," he said with a shrug. His eyes lifted to hers, guilt setting in again. "I'm sorry, Rain. If I'd had any idea you were somewhere in that city, too, I would've have just... left you there. Matt too. I had no clue. The few people I knew that I was able to find, people we used to work with or that I knew from meetings and training in the Hive... they didn't make it out. Like I said, people were dropping like flies, whether they were trained soldiers and law enforcement or not."

Of course the universe couldn't just let them go to sleep and have a nice peaceful night's slumber. Chad didn't know why he would even have expected that. He was the most pessimistic optimist ever, always hoping for the best yet expecting the worst. At least, for the time being, it was only one of them. As he dropped back down into the vehicle and secured the hatch, he nodded. "Yeah. With a face only a mother could love," he quipped. "Yeah, we might have some more knocking at our door in a few, depending on how close any others were and what shape they're in."

"Near as I've been able to tell, the undead hunt mostly via thermotaxis," he said as he sat in front of his monitors again and reset the motion detectors. "If their eyes and ears are still intact, sound and movement might also draw them, but predominantly, they move towards heat. It's a passive, internal compass kind of thing, like phototaxis in plants growing towards the sunlight. That's how undead whose eyes and ears have rotted completely away can still find you. They're drawn to heat as a proxy indication for the presence living organisms because the virus needs fresh DNA to continue to evolve, so it's making all its hosts thermotactic to drive its own evolution."

He had no idea how much of a total nerd he sounded like at that moment, but he was just trying to share potentially useful information. "Fun fact, they're also drawn to vehicles with engines that are still hot after you turn 'em off, and things like generators, large lights, even metal surfaces that heat up under sunlight. It's pretty funny to see one of 'em chomping down on and beating the shit out of a broken down soda machine outside a gas station because it heated up under the sun," he said with a chuckle. "They seem to know they shouldn't walk into fire, though. I guess that's a little too hot for them."

"Alright, we'll just stay here, then," Chad said with a shrug. "You've got a point, gas is hard to come by. It's even scarcer than ammo nowadays." He shook his head at the idea of something nastier coming to poke around the vehicle. "I don't think so. I think a lot of those larger, nasty creatures aren't undead, they're mutated animals. They seem to have a lot more intelligence and reasoning skills than undead do. So I think if we stay in here and don't move, we're not gonna draw anything to us because we don't look or smell like food. I could be wrong, but..." he trailed off, sighing as he finished up at the computers and moved back to his bed. "Okay, let's try this again," he said, settling back down to try to get some more sleep.

"The hell is your problem, dude? Did you seriously forget about me? Or what, you think I'm a clone? Be for real."

It was getting dark, so Chad pulled his armored vehicle over to the side of the road and set about preparing to settling in for the night. Over the years, he'd accumulated a lot of tech to help him survive, from computers and GPS, to motion sensors, timers, and alarms. Generators and power storage units were essential, as were solar panels and other methods of harnessing power as electrical grids began to fail seemingly everywhere.

Some of the tech he built himself, having raided hardware stores for parts, and others he'd acquired from abandoned police stations and homes. It passed the time, to sit and occupy himself with building computers, or to set up surveillance systems, or to create spreadsheets to catalogue all of his supplies, and he liked to keep his skills sharp. Why? He didn't really know anymore. Maybe it just kept him sane. He had about a million flashlights, flares, weapons, and a multitude of ammunition types, complete with all the batteries, solar chargers, hardware enhancements, additional parts, and optional adjustments he could store.

Metal boxes, backpacks, and duffel bags were stacked in an almost hedge-maze-like fashion inside the armored vehicle he'd taken over after it had been abandoned by the military. His bed was little more than a shelf nestled into all this organized chaos, but he found it strangely comforting to be boxed in while he slept... especially since he was alone most of the time.

Occasionally he joined up with some survivors, but he found it difficult to remain with them. Their goals were vastly different, with civilians wanting to find somewhere safe to hunker down and barricade, and Chad wanting to keep on the move to see what he could do to screw Umbrella over or help other people.

He'd gotten his motion sensor perimeter up around his mobile home, as it were, and had just taken his nightly dose of painkillers so he'd have half a chance of sleeping. The deep scars from where the licker had grabbed him as well as the pain of a few broken bones that hadn't quite healed properly from being thrown off the train on the way out of the Hive had him pretty much in near-constant pain. He'd learned to live with it, and as long as he was busy and moving, he could ignore it. At night, though, he needed some extra help from good ol' pharmaceuticals. Just over-the-counter, though, nothing too heavy. He couldn't risk not being able to wake up if something significant went down. And absolutely nothing with an Umbrella logo on the bottle.

That was when one of his alarms went off, indicating that something was moving in the near vicinity of the vehicle. "Really?" he groaned, his head falling to the right as he lay in his bed to look at the screen across the way. Sure enough, it was blinking. Sighing, he sat up and typed away, looking at the camera feed indicating movement. To his severe disappointment, it wasn't one of the undead. It looked like a soldier of some kind. "Just perfect," he said cynically. Grabbing a couple guns, he went out to investigate. What he found was... startling, to say the least.

It... it was Rain. His heart began to pound. No, Rain's dead. Don't get fooled again by those stupid clones. Man, they were creepy... Clones of his now-deceased friends and comrades that often times acted nothing like the originals. The Rain ones... were always particularly nasty. He lifted his rifle, leveling it at her. "That's far enough," he said coldly, assuming this was a clone. How can it not be?

But then she spoke, and almost simultaneously he began to notice that she looked a bit older. The clones always looked young, pristine. Swallowing hard, Chad found it difficult to breathe with how vigorously his heart was now pounding, rattling his ribcage. Faltering a little in his resolve, the tip of his rifle slowly dipped a bit and he stared incredulously at her.

"N-no, I-... Of course I didn't forget about you, but..." But you're dead. You've gotta be. Forgetting Rain - or anyone else he'd lost in the Hive due to his incompetence, poor planning, and cracking under the pressure - was never an option. He saw their faces almost nightly in the twisted horrors of his guilt-fueled nightmares.

Chad blinked, not knowing what to do. The rifle lowered just a bit more at the mention of clones. "Yeah, actually, that's exactly what I'm thinking. Wait, you're-... Are you telling me you're not a clone?" Oh, how he wanted to believe that, but he'd been fooled before, almost fatally. "Come on, don't fuck with me..." he said, more with a crestfallen type of exhaustion than with any sort of real intimidation attempt. "If you're not a clone... then prove it."

If this really was Rain, the real Rain, then he was about to feel like a huge jerk momentarily. But if it wasn't... he couldn't afford to let his guard down...

#wanderingaroundwithmysoul #kaplan rp #{ on to the next mission } ʷᵃⁿᵈᵉʳⁱⁿᵍ ᵛᵉʳˢᵉ

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demonicintegrity · 2 years ago

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I love this new uptick in blogs writing about Harry and Meghan (in a positive way! so many on here already do in a negative way) because they deserve the love and recognition, and I 100% agree with your episode 4 breakdown and loved reading it!

Now about the Meghan getting help thing, I think it's not exactly clear what she meant when she said they told her she couldn't "get help." Lots of people think it was just about talking to someone or seeing a therapist, but as a victims advocate for women in abusive situations, I absolutely read in between the lines of this docuseries and the Oprah interview and it's even more horrific than that.

Meghan's SI was so clear and she was so close to taking her life that she realized she needed to be checked into an institution, one of those whose entire purpose is to actively keep you from taking your life at any moment, and the royal family (the institution, not the members) said no because they didn't want the press to write about it.

It wasn't about therapists or checking on someone or asking if you are okay. It is the mental health equivalent to blocking someone with a bleeding wound from going to the ER and forcing them to sew and bandage it themselves.

Oh shit i completely forgot mental hospitals exist for a hot second. And that's on me because I cannot fathom bringing myself to one of those places even if at the brink of it all. I've heard way too many horror stories so that makes me hella nervous. Plus it's expensive for the average person.

But you're absolutely right, if she had needed to check into the hospital, even an ER just overnight before being cleared in the morning, the news would've gone absolutely insane. Not only would she be written off as weak for not being able to put up with it, as she already is,

but i can 100% guarantee you the media (and likely the family as well) would take that as an all clear to mark her as insane. Clinically insane to the point of nothing she said has ever nor ever will be credible. The ableism surrounding getting serious mental health help is awful. Mix that with the racism and suddenly she's a psychotic bitch and can't be trusted.

Now I'm not sure if that's actually what she wanted/implied with that statement. I'm gonna steer towards probably not purely because the thoughts she did voice in the episode were passive. Although striking a chord with me because I've had those exact thoughts before, it's not an active plan on its own. But maybe it was progressive to a dangerous degree, I have no way of knowing. Regardless, she wasn't getting the help she desperately needed and it's because the institution said no. Whether it be therapy or meds or something more serious, it's fucked up they did that. I hope she's doing better.

And yeah! Reality/celeb drama isn't my usual cup of tea, most often it's just not interesting to me. But also, I 100% understand that most of celebrity nonsense isn't my business. They're entitled to their own privates lives which includes private meltdowns and arguments, no matter how entertaining it can be. (And how nosey I can be.) I also want to be nothing but respectful and thus try not to stir shit when it isn't my place. But I've been making an exception to that with them. One part because ig im somewhat interested in who they are and why they were in the headlines so much. I also needed things to watch on netflix while im home on break.

But the other part is because it's beyond normal drama, it's The dysfunctional family falling apart. And it's not just a family it's an institution, which means this opportunity to learn about the institutional oppressions and how it functions. There are a web of things influencing and happening here, which is admittedly nice to pick at in interest. And the situations playing out deserve to be picked at and analyzed and see what we can learn from it. Respectfully of course but that might be a tall order from the masses.

Harry and Meghan deserve someone in their corner after all they've gone through, but they already have that. They'll never not be insanely popular in America at least. What's most deserving is tearing the British tabloids apart, they've been a problem far before Meghan's time and not just to the royal family. If they just weren't at play as much as they were, these wedges between family members could've been much more fixable.

And if this is the start of the end for the British Crown as well? Well it's about time it goes away if you ask me. Nepotism is never a good look, even if it's in shiny jewels.

#Im gonna try to watch ep 5 tonight #Harry and meghan #mental health #ask

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mithliya · 2 years ago

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thank you so much for the advice, i have talked a bit about it with some of my closest friends in the past couple of weeks & it did help me feel better, i will try writing down how i feel too. ooh a new jacket, nice :) yeah i hate gloves too, but they're necessary up in this part of the world sadly lmao

(tw: sa for this next part)

basically two years ago i was assaulted...well, what happened actually fits the legal definition of r*pe but i feel like a liar using that term so i just say assaulted most of the time. i kinda feel like it was partly my fault because i put myself in a situation where that was more likely to happen (i'd only been talking to him for a short time & i suspected he was lying when he said he liked me, but i was in a really bad place emotionally at the time & was doing risky things i wouldn't normally do) but the truth is i didn't want it to happen & i said no multiple times but he ignored me :| in hindsight i was clearly traumatized the next few months; i barely spoke at all to anyone & i got angry a lot. but i told myself i was just embarrassed because he'd ghosted me afterwards. anyway i've finally been able to admit to myself it wasn't just a “bad encounter” but it's not easy having to reflect on all that, esp. when i hear people say negative things about women who have been victimized in this way. it's crappy to feel guilty about something another person did. like why am *i* the one who feels bad? :|

sorry to hear you're dealing with memories of your own trauma too, i'm glad you're able to talk about it with people you trust 🫂

-East African anon 💕

i can talk to my gf about it but generally i don’t rly talk to anyone. i talk about it on my blog too. but my friends don’t rly get it and i don’t want them to feel bad plus idk it feels embarrassing almost. sometimes my mom mentions aspects of it to me bc my trauma was rly impacting me in every way as a teen and she would go to doctor’s appointments with me and stuff like that to tell them my story bc i couldn’t talk about it back then. im better now but i still need therapy for it (which i currently can’t afford right now bc of germany’s very stupid insurance-based healthcare system). this sort of stuff definitely takes time and if u can afford therapy you should absolutely go for it. you’ll probably feel worse at first bc talking about it and trying to process it often refreshes that stuff esp if ur traumatised, it can make u feel like ur literally there experiencing it again when ur talking about it. it still happens to me esp with the more recent traumas & ones im still trying to process but the initial one is still like that (not as bad as it once was tho)

im rly sorry u went through this :( i can understand how u feel.. the shame, embarrassment, powerlessness.. honestly im rly thankful that when it first happened, i had a friend who i talked to bc it was so overwhelming to me mentally & physically to remember what happened to me (i initially blocked it out for 2 days n then my rapist msged me and referenced it which brought back a flood of memories. i still don’t remember a section of it and don’t know how far it went exactly). that friend is the one who told me it was rape and explained to me how it was rape. if he hadn’t, i would’ve been blaming myself for some time and feeling ashamed and acting like im probably just feeling bad bc i must feel sth for him that he doesn’t feel bad or sth else. i remember questioning myself some days back then about how im probably to blame somehow and how im just being dramatic etc etc etc. it might be a bit more difficult for u to address ur trauma cause for me it took about 6 months for me to get help and that was already delayed (it’s encouraged to seek help immediately after or within 2 days or sth bc then the chances of being traumatised and developing ptsd are soooooo much lower) + it took me several days to remember the event & even somewhat process it so. it might be a tough journey for you at first. but you can do this!!! you’ve done the first step already and that’s the hardest part. the hardest part is no longer being in denial of what happened to you. accepting your own powerlessness and how you were hurt in that situation is DIFFICULT. after that, the healing process can finally begin. please feel free to message me whenever if u want someone to talk to about this. my trauma is not as recent, thankfully, but maybe talking to someone who understands can help you somewhat. imo it can be quite comforting knowing you’re not alone, you’re not at fault, and that there’s a future from events like this.

also i totally get you on being affected by how ppl talk about traumatised women. personally i often feel like the way ppl treat us is sometimes even worse than enduring the traumatic event in itself. we’re already in a fragile state bc of what happened, but being in an unsupportive victim-blaming world on top of it makes it even worse. when my rapist went around telling ppl in my school about what happened & when i talked to some ppl about it & they told me it was my fault or that i need to get over it etc.. it made the traumatic event 100x more painful. it’s important to have a good support system around you in this time, bc while many ppl may discount your story & victim blame u or other women, online and/or irl, there are people who will believe you and will stand by you and try their best to support you.

SORRY i ended up rambling a bit. my heads been all scattered for the past week or two. hopefully i was able to give you at least some level of comfort and help here .. pls feel free to talk to me about this stuff whenever. ill be able to handle it and it’ll be worth it if it somehow helps you.

#it sucked for me too bc the few friends i had that stood by me either switched schools or left bahrain bc it was during the arab spring as #well lol so i ended up having to rely on a guy abusing me for support.

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fluttershys-lament · 4 years ago

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how do i tell my friend she needs professional help without her getting mad at me??

#ask to tag #i've been telling her this since a few years ago but she got a little angry #so i stopped #but now she's venting to me again. but now it's different because she recognized smth i was trying to tell her or that i perceived #but didn't know how to say it #+ she just told me new things i didn't know and yeah they're negative #so #how do i tell her she needs a therapist?????#her parents aren't gonna take her to one. i know and she already told me years ago #but i wanna help her because #she's so traumatized and ???? all i know is that she needs help but idk how to say it w/o offending or annoying her like before #edit: nvm. we are talking things out #it feels better now #and she didn't react badly

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rainbowangel110 · 10 months ago

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School day over here's the review! (I wrote this on the bus)

Some classes are from last semester but two are diffrent

First period

• We're on our mineral unit and our teacher showed us a bunch of minerals and some pink granite. He said that you shouldn't put anything near your mouth or eyes as some of the elements in them could burn you. He then proceeded to lick some rock salt. I know it's safe but still.

Second period

• We mostly talked about our holidays. And then he told us to write down our grievances, anything in reason, doesn't matter if it's personal or not, and then make an unreasonable solution for it. He got the idea from Seinfeld. I wrote personal stuff, like how it's a little difficult planning your future and how art block sucks. I also wrote that that arophobes still being a thing is awful and they should go to jail. Oh and the economy sucks cuz hard workers (my dad) sometimes don't get paid enough. I know it sounds weird but look he's a cool teacher.

Third period

• Statistics! Teacher told me I got a 74 on the final which is the highest raw score I've gotten ever and I genuinely wanted to pop off right there, hell yeah I deserve that. He's really nice and helps me whenever the going gets tough. Negative was that I threw out all my paperwork from last semester cuz I didn't want that burden anymore and he said we needed an old test cuz we haven't finished chapter 4 so uh hahaha 🙃 fuck

Fourth period

• FRIEND FRIEND FRIEND HELLO OLD FRIEND HOW ARE YOU!!! Also it's digital art :) anyways FRIEND!! I showed her my OC journal or at least the title page I made (finished the sketch now gonna color it (you'll see the sketch soon!!)) We regularly talk about our characters, she's really sweet.

Fifth period

• First new class, teacher seems really nice, can't wait to see what we have in store. Small surprise was the fact that the fistbump-highfive dude was in it as well. Okay so this guy, he basically walks around fistbump-highfives everyone asking how they're doing and how it's going and it's sweet. He's a little loud but it's alright.

Sixth period

• Another new class but lol the teacher wasn't here so we just sat around "doing" our work. There was a sub but she didn't really care. Work is due Friday which should be alright, teacher sent out a message she'll be back Monday (she got sick :()

Seventh period

Smaller class (got swapped from 5th to 7th) still going good. But oh my god the girl I sat next to. What the fuck man. She was drawing and I swear to go it was so GOOD!!! She had these two books for references to body portions and poses and stuff and wow the work she was doing. My god you just had to be there. I didn't take a pic cuz that would be a little weird, but wow.

First day of the second semester hell yeah let's go let's not have a repeat of the last one we got this

#just rebloging #Good first day :)

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valkyrieandstrangeridingaragorn · 2 years ago

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Just got back from L&T. Thoughts under the cut. But first, a pic of my girl (sorry, I mean, Your Majesty 👑):

So I have a few negatives to talk about but let's start with the positives.

The scene with Thor and Zeus when he's trying to convince him to join him against Gorr reminded me so much of his talk with Odin in TDW. At some point I thought they were trying to draw some parallels... but honestly I don't know if it's just me seeing things when there's nothing. Either way, I liked it.

Thor's speech to the kids towards the end was touching.

Val handling King duties and enjoying it was lovely to see.

Jane explaining the Einstein-Rosen bridge while under chemo. She was never boring and that enthusiasm is contagious. "You just destroyed your book!" - "Yeah! But now you understand wormholes!". She's lovely and I'll miss her.

Heimdall! My beloved. Only for 10 seconds but hey, I'll take whatever they give me, I love that man. Shorter hair too!

And this is something between a positive and a negative: I like that Thor said to Quill something in the lines of (I'm paraphrasing here): "You have a team that cares for each other, I never had that". I actually liked it because from what we've seen in the movies he had 4 friends who seemed to follow him and look up to him but we never saw him having a deep conversation with them, to me they were more party/battle friends than anything and Thor always stroked me as a very lonely person despite being a prince. Not to mention the Avengers never truly showed any interest, let alone compassion, especially in EG. So that line is interesting to keep in the movie...... that is, if you do something with it. But they just had him say it then ignored it for the rest of the movie. It's such a lost opportunity. Imagine Thor shit-talking the Avengers and setting the record straight after EG... if only.

Now, the negatives.

I don't understand all this talk about worthiness. If Ragnarok was supposed to teach Thor and the audience anything is that being worthy is utterly meaningless! Lifting Mjolnir was always entirely subjective, reliant on a bunch of rules dictated by a deeply flawed character like Odin. Thor is supposed to know he doesn't need that hammer or the axe or anybody's approval. He's the golden child, if he doesn't learn that then his arc keeps going in circles, and round and round it goes. It makes no sense.

I can't believe 2 movies in since she was introduced and my girl Val does not get a name. I appreciate people calling her Val but surely she's got a name, right? And her horse? I'll say this though: I don't remember them giving him a name but I'm grateful, if they call him anything but Aragorn my URL is truly fucked 😜

Why bring Sif back? She's the LAST connection Thor has to his old life. I was so happy to see her again since I genuinely thought he was going to lose it or they were gonna have some chat or something, but nah, they share one scene that's eerily similar to Thor 1 and they're good to go.

Once again character development is done in a rushed one-minute sequence. I watch these movies because I care about these characters, if that means you add 25 minutes to the damn movie then do so. If that means you cut a few fights then do so.

Thor realizing he wants and needs love is nice but giving him a kid is not the way to go, that's giving him someone to care for when he should be caring ABOUT AND FOR HIMSELF.

What kind of relationships does he have with Val and the others? A bunch of scenes with the Guardians and all I saw were screams and nothing more when that team is more a family than anything else, they wouldn't go about it like the Avengers (battle together then each member goes their own way), the Guardians care.

I would have wanted to see how the Asgardians are adapting to Earth or a bit more from New Asgard. Jane gets a statue, that's cool, no statues for anybody else though?

Oh the """queer rep""".... we were told she would look for her Queen but of course that didn't happen, I wish I could say I'm surprised but I'm not. And she doesn't even get to say anything, it's Korg who says "girlfriend" and leaves it at that? You know what, it's far worse to have this, I'd rather not have anything. If this is as far as they're willing to go please STOP. Everyone is straight, that's easier to digest.

Also, it's so fucking annoying to see people erasing her identity and saying she's a lesbian. No she isn't, Valkyrie is bisexual. We have enough bi erasure as it is, don't contribute to it.

And speaking of my girl... where the fuck is her arc? She gets no story, her pegasus is only on screen a couple times, she seems to be enjoying being a King so why not show that and how she's growing from being a warrior raised to kill to becoming someone trustworthy who loves her people and learns the humans' rules so she can defend them? Also she's still not redeemed, she has never said anything about how she feels after being raised to kill and commit genocide, how she felt about Odin (when Gorr was telling her I was almost begging! for her to speak up). I will admit I jumped when she was stabbed though. I may have a weird definitely non-healthy attachment to her lol

The problem about introducing new and powerful cities and weapons while Feige keeps parroting all that bs about "connected universe" is that it makes previous movies absolutely useless. So Thor knew about Omnipotent City? Why not go there in IW instead of Nidavellir then? Once you open the portal to Eternity why not kill Gorr and ask for anything...

Gorr the God Butcher who's shown on-screen killing the crazy amount of......... one god in the entire movie. So much for butchering.

"Lady Thor", "the name is Mighty Thor or Dr Jane Foster", I knew she was going to say that. Way too forced. You want feminism, Marvel? Flesh out the female characters and stop giving them the suits and powers of their male counterparts.

And lastly, what Mjolnir means to Thor. What that hammer represents is his past, his family, the time when stability was ensured and he had everything he wished for, back in the day when he didn't know the lies and what was hiding underneath the golden palace and his father's machinations. His attachment to Mjolnir in reality what it hides is his subconscious desire to go back to that time, which is exactly why he should despise that hammer! Not through hate for Hela but disappointment and anger towards his father.

All I keep seeing in these movies is Thor not growing up or out of his golden child status and I HATE IT. And it seems the only way they know to make characters "grow" is by giving them a romance or a kid... these characters need self-love, how is it possible that these writers and directors don't understand that familial, romantic, etc love is not the same as self-love? That you can have a million people who love you and still not love yourself?

Overall this is clearly the worst Thor movie for me, worse than Ragnarok, and I give it a 4/10 and I'm being generous (3,5 of those are for Val 😂). I still love Thor though, there are.... flashes of his old self and while short they remind me why I've always been a big fan of his.

Thor honey, you deserve so much more than this.

#Thor #thor: love and thunder #thor love and thunder #thor love and thunder spoilers #spoilers #valkyrie #mcu critical

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autumnslance · 2 years ago

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I noticed you doing character bingos again! I’d like to see one for Zenos if possible. I had fun with him in Stormblood, but found that joy to drowned with how he was handled in Endwalker. By the end I just wanted to be done with that monster. If the game had let me walk away without fighting him, like he suggested, I would have.

Wild, we're about the opposite; I disliked Zenos a great deal in Stormblood--he was bloody useless and an annoyance out of nowhere--while I feel they finally figured him out and mostly hit their stride with him in Endwalker, as he gave up pretending to care about military and political matters and became the wandering blood knight he actually is.

Almost got a bingo, but let's be real; I always have too much to say about major characters.

I also won't say anything negative about folks' WoLships, which are by far the most popular Zenos pairing; folks have their fun and they're welcome to it. But fandom is a good chunk of the issue with Zenos. One either loves him or hates him, and both sides tend to take it to extremes and flanderize / mischaracterize the man rather than dealing with the canon portrayal.

In my opinion, he's not that deep. Yes I have read "The Hunt Begins" thank you I own a copy of Chronicles of Light. It told us nothing new about his history and personality, just gave us a glimpse of where he started to find his focus, exactly as the title tells us. The thing is, Zenos doesn't have to be "deep" (whatever one means by that) to be compelling and do his job as a character in the story. Given his straightforward viewpoints, especially in EW as he gives an answer to Hermes' questions, Zenos himself might scoff at the need to find hidden depth of meaning to his personality and existence.

I've also said somewhere, probably my other big Zenos write-up, that he's not quite tragic, though there's tragedy all around and through him. He chooses to not deal with it in any fashion, a creature of the present entirely.

I think he needed a better introduction, seeded over the HW patches, even just in discussion and rumors if we still didn't see him until that patch 3.55 shot. I think he should have done something in StB other than be a "lose the fight the right way" plot checkpoint and just handing Doma and Ala Mhigo back to the heroes without having to really work for them.

I really think a massive part of the dissatisfaction many folks have with StB's story is that the victories are hollow after so much misery in those lands, who are then each shorted due to sharing the expansion. And a lot of that comes down to the misuse of Zenos, whose attributes are mostly told to us as he sleeps on the throne and bullies his underlings. For a supposedly brilliant man, we never see it in his military strategies, and he's played handily by Fandaniel, who knew just how to pull Zenos's strings.

So yeah. I was ready to be done with him in EW; "In From the Cold" is horrifying but I see it more as Fandaniel's scheme that Zenos goes all into. My WoL stopped caring about Zenos the moment trial 1 ended and Fandaniel's scheme became clear. I eye rolled whenever Zenos came back onscreen, though I think the scene in Garlemald with Jullus and Alisaie were good for him and lead directly into the finale.

I know what I just wrote and that I checked "too much screentime" but honestly he got a shade too little in EW. I DID dread/expect some kinda 11th hour teamup, though the "how" made me laugh incredulously. It worked in its weird way.

The final fight he still didn't understand my WoL but she was done and wanted to make sure it was finally over and he wouldn't darken her door or threaten anyone again. The solo duel is not unknown in other FF games, and I rather enjoyed it and the final punch-out at the end as they exhausted themselves entirely.

Mileage varies, depending on one's WoL, feelings on Zenos, and on that tropey duel of mirrored characters. I've also already spoken to the gripes about him being truly gone per Word of God and while one can do whatever one wants in fanfic, there's a lot of reason it does, in fact, work to leave his corpse at the edge of the universe and I'm OK with it. His part in the story, and how that affects Assumed Default Warrior of Light's self-understanding, is complete.

Like the Ascians, he's done. Interested to see what's up with his Avatar, since we also got nothing on his being a Reaper (could have used more on that too!!) as we move into the 6.x patches and build up of the next arc.

#Final Fantasy XIV #Lyn Prompts #character bingo #memes #character analysis #Endwalker #6.0 spoilers #Zenos Galvus

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dragonbugsuperior · 4 years ago

Text

Adrien's Manipulation and How He Manipulates

As you can see, I have spoken about the things the ml writers have done and attempted to get away with however I never dug deep into how manipulative Adrien is and how he has manipulated people. I have provided real transcripts from the episodes. You can look it up yourself they're there for everyone to see.

In Malediktator (season 2, episode 24) Chloe threatens to leave Paris, Mr. Bourgeois gets akumatized into Maledikator; invested with absolute power, he wants to make his daughter's dreams come true so that she stays with him. In the episode, Chloe announces that she's leaving Paris to the entire school and the students are thrilled. They were celebrating the fact that their school bully was leaving Paris. Including Marinette, who was also relieved to know her bully/tormentor was leaving Paris. The same girl who's been bullying Marinette for years.

Here's some real transcripts from the actual episodes

Chloé: (from the helicopter, through megaphone) Hey there, losers! I'm headed to New York with my mom. (throws flyers) I'm leaving you all behind in your pathetic little school and your pathetic little city. Adieu!

(Marinette picks up a flyer showing Chloé in front of the Statue of Liberty.)

Nino: Chloé's leaving?

Nathaniel: Forever?

Marinette: Looks like it.

Alya: Yeah.

(Everyone jumps in the air out of happiness; confetti appears out of thin air and there are fireworks for no reason at all. Everyone, including Mr. Damocles, dances and parties.)

Marinette: Without Chloé around, Paris will be filled with a lot less negative emotion!

Tikki: And less akumatizations.

(Adrien walks up to Marinette from behind.)

Adrien: Hey, what’s going on here? What are we celebrating?

Marinette: Chloé’s gone! She’s moving to New York!

Adrien: Chloé left…? For good?

Marinette: (still excited, not realizing that Adrien is not sharing everyone else’s enthusiasm) Yeah! Isn’t it great?

Adrien: Uh… no. I think it’s terrible! How can you celebrate a thing like that?

There

There's the manipulation. Adrien guilts Marinette for being happy that her tormentor is gone. He guilts her for being relieved to know that her school bully is leaving Paris. Not only did he make Marinette feel guilty for feeling the way that she did. But the episode also deems Marinette as if she's selfish for feeling glad that Chloe is gone. While Adrien completely invalidates Marinette's feelings, and does not take into consideration that Chloe has bullied and made Marinette's life a living hell for years. Adrien knows Chloe has been bullying Marinette for years and instead of letting her feel happy that her bully is gone he guilts her and shames her saying that she shouldn't be celebrating something like that. Not contemplating the fact that Marinette has been bullied, shamed, taunted, and tormented for years. All because Chloe's his childhood friend and she was his only friend. He continues to support Chloe, and guit-trips Marinette for being happy that her life-long bully is finally leaving, because he doesn’t care about how Chloe torments everyone in the class or how she’s literally abusing Sabrina, all he cares about is how her leaving affects him.

In Glaciator Chat Noir imposes a date with Ladybug.

Transcript

Cat Noir: So, uh, Ladybug? What would you say if you and I met up tonight for a little dinner? Rooftop style?

Ladybug: For dinner? As superheroes?

Cat Noir: Well, uh, yeah. That's right. We're only together when we're saving Paris. I mean, wouldn't you actually like to get to know one another?

Ladybug: I... That's so thoughtful of you, but I can't. I have to, uh, I already have plans with some friends.

Bus driver: (steps out of the bus and shakes hands with Cat Noir) Thank you. (shakes Ladybug's hand) Thank you, Ladybug.

Cat Noir: Well, if your plans end early, come and join me.

Ladybug: We'll see.

Cat Noir: I'll be waiting, my lady.

(Ladybug uses her yo-yo and leaves. Cat Noir smiles at her for a moment before he leaves too)

Ladybug tells Chat Noir that she has plans with friends, Chat Noir still insists that she comes if her plans end early. Ladybug never says yes to him nor does she confirm she will show up while he says he'll be waiting.

Alya, Nino, Marinette, and Adrien were planning on having a date together, Adrien lies to his friends and tells them that his father said he couldn't go. Actively upsetting them and ruining their date, because 'Oh! Poor Adrien couldn't make it!. The thing is-

Adrien could have made it.

He himself, chose not to.

He didn't even inform his father about going out with friends.

Adrien never mentions going out with friends to Gabriel. He never tells Nathalie nor the Gorilla anything just so he could prepare a date with Ladybug, who also never confirmed she was going on the date.

[Next transcript is very important to read]

(Adrien sighs before he takes out his phone to text Nino. He then checks the time)

Nathalie: There's no point in waiting for your father, Adrien. He'll be eating in his office.

Adrien: (stands up from his chair, quietly angry) Then what's the point of keeping me here if he's never gonna show up, Nathalie? (walks away to go to his room)

Nathalie: Don't forget to practice your piano before you go to bed.

He doesn't tell Nathalie or Gabriel. He tells Nino that he won't be able to make it because his father wouldn't allow him to, yet Adrien didn't even see Gabriel because he was in his office the entire time.

Scene: Adrien's room.

Plagg: You could've at least grabbed the piece of Camembert on that platter!

Adrien: (tosses a piece of Camembert to Plagg and he catches it) Fuel up, Plagg. (He turns on some piano music from his phone. He then places the phone on top of the real piano) Adrien may not be allowed out of the house, but Cat Noir is!

Adrien's off to his date with Ladybug, which she never agreed that she would come, lying to his friends and telling them that his father wouldn't let him go out with them.

Plagg: You seem in a hurry to get stood up.

Adrien: She didn't say she wasn't coming.

Plagg: But she didn't say she was either!

This is also important to take in mind, it doesn't matter if she didn't say wasn't coming, she also didn't say she was coming like Plagg said. She told him she had plans with her friends.

Scene: Trocadéro. Marinette meets up with her friends

Marinette: Hey, Alya!

Alya: Hey, Marinette! (Both she and Marinette kisses each other's cheeks)

Marinette: Where's Adrien?

Alya: Don't get upset, okay? But Nino just got a text. Adrien's dad isn't letting him go out.

Again, Adrien tells Nino his dad won't let him go out. Lying and upsetting his friends, which automatically makes them feel bad because they're poor friend can't come out with them.

Marinette: Once again...

Nino: Yo, Marinette!

Ivan: What's up, M?

Mylène: How are you, Marinette?

Marinette: I'm fine. Thanks. Hehe. So, do you know where André is today?

Later in the episode, they have patrol

And this is what Chat Noir says to Ladybug

Ladybug: Hello, Kitty. Did the bad guys leave you cold?

Cat Noir: (harsh and enraged) How was your amazing evening with your "friends"?

(Ladybug looks confused at Cat Noir, shocked by her partner's harsh words. But she gasps when she hears Glaciator's voice.)

He gets passive aggressive and sarcastic with her. He's angry because she didn't show up to a date she never agreed to going on.

[Transcript]

Ladybug: Are you mad at me because I didn't show up?

Cat Noir: (furious) What do you think?

Ladybug: I didn't mean to hurt you.

(Glaciator jumps over them and continues walking. Ladybug and Cat Noir take shelter behind a car)

Cat Noir: And I also had a surprise for you, too!

Ladybug: I really am sorry.

Cat Noir: No... I'm the one who's sorry. Maybe another time.

Ladybug feels bad for not showing up. Ladybug shouldn't have to apologize for not showing up. She never agreed to going on the date and Chat Noir knows that. He knows she had plans with her friends and guilts her because apparently she didn't show up to a date she never intended on going on. While he was the one who gave her the cold shoulder the entire time they were fighting off Glaciator and acted like a 5 year old child.

The blatant manipulation

Chat Noir guilts Ladybug because she didn't show up to a date she never agreed that she would go on. Resulting in her feeling bad and apologizing to him as if she said she'll go. She never confirms she'll make it. She tells him she has plans with friends and they'll see. That doesn't equate to yes. Adrien lies to his friends and tells them he won't be able to make it because his father wouldn't let him go out, meanwhile Adrien never tells Gabriel anything about going out with friends.

In Syren

Adrien gets tired of all the secrets Ladybug had to keep from him and threatens to quit. Blackmailing Plagg threatening to quit as a superhero if Plagg doesn't tell him what secret Ladybug's been hiding from him.

[Transcript]

Adrien: (imitating Ladybug) Hey, Cat Noir, do you trust me? (as himself) Sure, Ladybug; do you trust me, too? (as Ladybug) Are you kidding? I will never trust you! Ha ha ha ha! (normally, to Plagg) You must know what Ladybug's hiding from me, Plagg.

Plagg: I'm just a kwami, Adrien, and we kwamis have a right to remain silent.

Adrien: Pity. (gets out his phone) Just when I was about to order you some very tasty cheese. Have you ever sampled La Trappe d'Échourgnac? It says here it tastes like walnuts.

Plagg: (swallows some Camembert) I can't be swayed, sorry.

He bribes Plagg with cheese to get information out of him about Ladybug

Cat Noir: Wait! Where're you going?

Ladybug: (hesitantly) I can't.

Cat Noir: (disappointedly) Say anything. Yeah, I know. But we are a team, aren't we? (turns away from Ladybug) I'm tired of all these secrets.

Ladybug: I'm sorry. It's not exactly easy for me either, trust me. (she leaps away while Cat Noir turns to see her leaving him)

(Cat Noir sits down on the roof to wait for Ladybug to return.)

He himself admits that he knows she can't tell him anything. He knows she's under restrictions and he pulls this.

Cat Noir: This is so dumb! (stands up) Claws in. (detransforms)

Plagg: (groans) What's taking her so long? (Adrien holds up his hands to Plagg, and starts to pull off his ring a little bit) Whoa, easy! W-What are you doing?!

Adrien: (grimly) If you don't tell me what Ladybug is hiding from me, I'm done!

Plagg: You can't do that!

Adrien: (bitterly) Why not? No one'll know if I quit. No one'll care!

Plagg: I will!

He blackmails Plagg, and threatens to let millions of people drown just because he wants to know a secret he isn't worthy of knowing.

[Transcript for Frozer]

In Frozer he gets rejected for the hundredth time

Ladyice: Cat Noir. We need to set up a trap for whoever turned the city into a giant ice rink. (throws yo-yo)

Icecat: (bitterly) My feline instincts prefer to track and observe before I attack. You go your way, I'll go mine.

Ladyice: Please don't tell me you're mad at me about the rose.

Icecat: There may be a certain chill now between us.

Ladyice: I get it, but we should really focus on saving Paris

Icecat: We don't always have to do everything together, after all. It's not like we're a couple. (skates away)

Ladyice: Cat Noir, don't get all pouty on me! (groans and takes off on her yo-yo)

(Ladyice and Icecat separately search for Frozer)

Icecat: (notices Frozer's skate marks on the ice) This way.

Ladyice: I need to set a trap, but what could I use as bait? (while Ladyice thinks, Frozer prepares to sneak up behind her, but Icecat spots him attempting to do so and pulls Ladyice out of harm's way)

Ladyice: Thanks, Kitty.

(Icecat winks)

Once again, he makes her feel guilty for turning him down for the millionth time in a row as if he doesn't know she's in love with someone else. Acting like an asshole the entire time they fight off Frozer.

In Copyat, Chat Noir arrives at a ceremony.

Scene: The Place des Vosges. The ceremony has just ended.

Cat Noir: These statues are amazing. One thing's slightly off though— I'm actually taller than Ladybug.

Théo: Ladybug didn't show up. I just wanted to express my adoration for her. Let her know that everything I had went into her statue. I'm sure if she took a little time to get to know me, she would see how much we have in common. Our devotion to the things we love.

Cat Noir: Hey, don't mean to burst your bubble, but you know, Ladybug and me, we're a thing, you know?

Théo: Really?

Cat Noir: Yeah, we're like this. (crosses his fingers)

Théo: (growls; walks away angrily) What does Ladybug see in him?

He lies to Theo about the relationship he has with Ladybug leaving Theo angry causing him to become akumatized.

Cat Noir: Better help the fellow out. His crush just got crushed. (under his breath, as he leaves) That makes two of us.

Théo: Ugh... What am I doing here? Ladybug?

Ladybug: I'm sorry I couldn't make it this morning, Théo.

Théo: Can you autograph it for me?

Ladybug: Of course I can! You've got some real artistry here. You've really captured my essence.

Théo: Thank you, Ladybug. And don't worry. I know about you and Cat Noir. It's okay.

Ladybug: Huh?

Ladybug is left to apologize to Theo and deal with the rest. Theo tells her not to worry, he knows about her and Chat Noir to which she reacts with utter confusion. Chat Noir lied to Theo, causing his akumatization not even facing consequences at the end nor apologizing to Theo, instead Marinette does all the work while being left confused.

Adrien is a lying, manipulative, and conniving person. He has manipulated his friends, Plagg, and Marinette. This is not okay

And the writers portray it to be while making Marinette look bad

#marinette dupain cheng #miraculous ladybug #adrien agreste #marinette deserves better #miraculous plagg #stop defending him #manipulators #adrien salt #cancelmiraculous #canceladrienagreste #predatory cis straight white boy billionaire

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gralunaisland · 3 years ago

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Yknow, that 100yq screencap reminds me of something infuriating about 100yq-- the fact that Edolas Gruvia is not only a thing, but it's on a "we have a child" level.

Honestly. I would accept the shitty Gruvia in the main story if someone held a gun to my head, but I would never accept it for their Edolas versions. They had even less chemistry and setup than their Earth versions, and somehow, in seven years, semi-girlboss Edo Juvia (who took NO shit from stalker Edo Gray, last we saw her,) is now just a meek little sweet wifey to her barely characterised former creep husband. I do not understand why that happened. They just wanted to massacre everything about Edolas for the sake of giving us some coupling and I hate it so much. At least Edolas NaLu had some setup during the Edolas arc. (Edolucy blushing at Natsu being bold, for example) but Edolas Gruvia just became canon in 100yq because Mashima wanted people to squeal about a forced "GRUVIA LOVECHILD".

Also, Natsu and Gray spend most of that arc just fighting over comparing 'their kids' and I wanted to bash my head against the table.

I'm sorry for ranting. I'm just so angry about it because we waited so long to finally see the Edolas gang again, only for Mashima to use it for cringey OOC ship fanservice instead of the genuine reunions we wanted to see.

Feel free to rant all you want, my friend, this is a safe place for discussion and tirades, goodness knows I do it all the time myself!

I love to hear what people have to say about these things; from rants to questions, it opens many new insights, so never apologize for it!

I've gotta say I'm a bit different from you in the fact that I hate Earthland gr///via much worse than Edolas gr///via (which I’m sure surprises no one because what in FT could I hate more than gr///via?) but now that you mention it, I had especial reason to hate the Edo version too.

As you said, Earthland gr///via, as despicable as it is, unfortunately does make more sense than Edo gr///via because they had a lot of build-up and "moments" thanks to Mashima's garbage writing.

Really, Edo gr///via never made sense to me either, especially after I heard they had a kid a long time ago. Because if I'm remembering correctly, Edo Gray was just a namby-pamby wimp who wore too much and sniveled over Edo juvia, and Edo juvia was a grumpy sourpuss who told him she would only date him if he wore less clothes, so there really was negative chemistry between them.

For Edo juvia to date Gray on the basis only that he didn't bundle up so much? Noooot very romantic. For Edo Gray to keep up being slobbery over her? Alsoooo not very romantic. Really gross in fact.

I've had the luck to not see much of their Edo children yet, nor of their Edo coupling so I'll take your word for it that Edo juvia also turned mushy gushy, which sounds just so uncharacteristic of herself, and I assume Edo Gray stayed namby-pamby.

I guess we really shouldn't be surprised anymore that Mashima doesn't give his characters growth very much; he makes them devolve more often than not.

You're right that the Edo NaLu had a much better build-up. I don't really care that they paired up since of course, the Edolas stuff shouldn't be reflecting Earthland stuff anyway as they're each their own separate realms (though I'm sure NaLu and gr///via stans have just been freaking out over it), but the Edo gr///via thing is just a travesty of writing.

I love how you said he only coupled Edo gr///via to make the "gR///VIA LOVECHILD" because, yeah, I'm totally convinced that's the only reason why, to throw a bone to the rabid gr///via fandom, not because the Edo version was a good healthy couple. Honestly, Earthland and Edolas gr///via are just so cursed and should've never been conceived, just like the Edo gr///via kid. -_-

Man, I'd want to bash my head too if I had to read Gray and Natsu actually being possessive over kids that aren't even theirs. That's just creepy. Doesn't matter that they look like the Edo versions, they're all completely different people.

It's so sad too because I love the Edolas arc, the first one of course. It's just a fun one with mystery and exploration and adventure, and the biggest plus is Earthland juvia IS NOT IN IT. But then of course, Mashima has to ruin that as one of my only havens and shove gr///via in it as well.

I'm very disappointed that he didn't handle this 100yq arc better too, Anon, and I am very sorry that it's affected you so harshly. The OG Edolas arc and cast deserved a better reunion, especially after such a tearful goodbye the first time.

Do better, Mashima.

#my disappointment in mashima swells every time i hear something like this...#it's just disheartening to know even classics like the edolas arc are being ruined #askgraluna #ask #anti gruvia #anti juvia #anti juvia loxar #anti juvia lockser #fairy tail #anon #defend gray fullbuster #anti edolas gruvia #edolas #fairy tail 100yq #anti fairy tail 100yq #anti mashima

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mashup-writing · 4 years ago

Text

If only you were here; Hwang Yeji (ITZY)

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Summary: Yeji was the leader, she couldn't afford to be seen being anything less than perfect for the role. No crying, being sad, or feeling any kind of negativity. But she's only human, and being human means letting your emotions run through you.

Requested? ☒

"Miles away from seeing you."

--------------------٩(◕‿◕｡)۶--------------------

She was exhausted. Today's schedule was nothing but hectic, from interviews to filming for music videos. All Yeji had wanted to do was be with her girlfriend, to have her take away the stress, to run her fingers through her hair, to hold her like doing so was the only thing keeping her together. But with Y/N visiting her hometown? The best she could do was a facetime.

She loved her job, her members, and their MIDZYs. She really does. But sometimes the high life takes more from you than it gives. Lately her girls have been facing prejudiced hate from a bunch of ruthless people online. Lia was being branded as "Lazy" and it made the leader's blood boil, among all five of them Lia was the one who spends the most time in the practice room, especially when she has trouble with some of the choreography. She remembers a memory of theirs that included Lia almost passing out of exhaustion in the practice room, Yeji herself wasn't enough to pull the pale and sluggish girl out of there. If Yuna's maturity and hidden stern-ness hadn't reared their heads then she has no doubt that Lia would've ended up in a hospital bed.

Chaeryeong is under fire for "Being Ugly" and all Yeji could do was scoff at the stupidity of the false accusation. Despite Yeji being Y/N's girlfriend, Chaeryeong was the latter's bias. This information had her shocked, Chaeryeong smug, and worst of all: It gave Ryujin a field day. Which resulted in getting the other three members in on teasing her. "Anyone who catches Y/N's eye is fucking beautiful" she mutters to herself. Not to toot her own horn but Y/N has an eye not only for gorgeous looking people, most times those she ends up liking are great people with great personalities. Your ex, Ahn Hyejin of Mamamoo is a damn great example of that.

Another one of her members under fire is Yuna, the baby of their new little family. Knets had a field day when it was found out that the Maknae wasn't originally planned to become a part of ITZY. Jumping on the chance to poke at the youngest's insecurity, thry took to saying that she wasn't good enough to be with them, much less have debuted at all. That's bullshit, and she won't leave room for argument. Yuna is the glue that holds them together, the friend that they can't imagine not having even when they've been a group for less than a year. She stands up to Yeji without being disrespectful when the leader is being too strict or controlling. She pulls Lia out of her workaholic state whenever it starts to become detrimental instead of beneficial. She is the one carrying Ryujin's ass whenever the latter thinks her dad jokes are funny. She's the one to calm Chaeryeong down backstage whenever the latter is feeling nervous, anxious or on the verge of a breakdown.

Ryujin's a reliable friend through and through, but if the fate of the world was decided by the rapper's ability to tell a funny joke? Yeji bets that they all would've died ages ago, she's better at joking around with actions than she is with words. Which leads to some people labeling some of Ryujin's actions as "Bullying". Yeji admits to herself that, yes. To the untrained eye it does seem as if Ryujin's the type, she has the face of a villain when she wants to look intimidating after all. But the rapper is also the softest person she has ever known in her life, testified by the one time they had a pillow fight in the dorm. In the heat of the moment, Ryujin's slipper got thrown and it knocked a Lizard dead off their wall. The pillow fight abruptly ended with four members trying to make her feel less guilty over the critter's untimely death.

Lia interjected that had the moment been captured on camera, some MIDZYs would be making a meme of how they'd like to be that "Lucky" lizard. Ryujin cried harder, because the lizard was not at all "Lucky" in her opinion.

--------------------------------------------------

Yeji was so lost in her own thoughts and so fatigued that she didn't even realize that she had finished changing from her performance outfit to the clothes she wore before clocking in for work. It was only when she had closed the door to her dorm room did she realize how tired she actually was. She was thankful she had been given her own room instead of bunking with someone else again, she's not too sure she could make it up in a bunk bed if she was still roommates with someone.

She crashes onto the bed and pulls out her phone. Most days she would get some shut eye and just facetime her girlfriend in the morning, but at the moment she thinks she'll end up in a mental ward if she goes another second without hearing her Y/N speak. So despite the fact that she can't feel her legs anymore and that her eyelids are growing heavier by the second, she calls.

Ring

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Ring

You're pulled from the coziest and most comfortable sleep you've fallen into for the night by a constant ringing. You rub your eyes and turn towards your nightstand where your phone is located. "Who in their right fucking mind would be calling at this hour?" You grab your phone and the caller photo snaps you out of your mood before you even see the caller's name.

You hurriedly turn on your lamp on the nightstand and then proceeded to hit answer. "YEJ- whoa, not that I'm unhappy to see you but you look like you should be asleep instead. You look tired as hell Yej. Did you eat yet? How about water? Please stay away from dehydration and be sure to drink regularly." Yeji smiles at you, with her eyes drooping every now and then. "Yeah, I should be asleep but I just missed you so much I couldn't sleep without seeing you first."

You sit up and lean against the head board instead of laying down, your worry increasing tenfold. "What's wrong?" Yeji knows how to prioritize her health first and she never calls you half asleep because she had always claimed that you deserved nothing less than her full attention. She never calls you half asleep unless she's alarmingly close to losing her composure. Her eyes widen as soon as the question leaves your mouth, and a sniffle makes its way through the line. She burried her face in her arm and struggles with wanting to tell you and wanting to fake being strong with you.

You sense the dilemma within your girl and you refuse to let her carry this alone. "Hey, I'd never force you to spill. But I am always gonna be here to listen to your troubles. I already know how strong you are, you've got nothing more to prove. Let it out and I'll be here to support you." Yeji's resolve crumbles and she cries as she tells you everything that's been weighing her down today. She cries because of the unfairness of it all, she cries about how she can't protect her girls, she cries about how she wants nothing more than to wrap them up in a hug and not let go until they're all better but the girls just like their leader want to seem strong and untouchable for each other.

Yeji cries about how she wishes she was with you instead of working, she cries about how guilty she feels for sometimes wishing that they never had to go through the unfairness that the idol life had to offer, she cries about how she feels like she's disappointing the MIDZYs for feeling as she feels. She cries because it's just the start of their journey and she's already so tired. She cries because it's the only way she knows how to get rid of the stress, even if it's just a temporary solution.

What hurts you the most is that she doesn't look at you as she says this. You're a MIDZY after being Yeji's girlfriend and it you don't miss the way she chokes up even more when she said she feels like she's disappointing the fandom. You let your girlfriend let it all out before taking a moment to pull yourself together, and then you speak.

"I can't and I won't tell you that I understand how you feel as an Idol because I'm not one. But as a MIDZY, I can and I will tell you that you were born to be the leader of ITZY, no one else could step up to that role as well as you do even if they tried. Tell the girls I told you to let the haters run their mouths, because we MIDZYs know that each and every one of you brings something special to the table. ITZY isn't ITZY if it doesn't have Hwang Yeji, Choi Jisu, Shin Ryujin, Lee Chaeryeong and Shin Yuna as the members. You girls are a fucking unit and you are all strong enough to knock those bitches speechless."

You stare at Yeji the whole time and notice that although her body has stopped shaking, her tears are still making their way down her cheeks. You take in every detail of her face and wish with everything within you that you were there with her to wipe her tears and hold her close. In your opinion, words aren't enough but you suppose due to the distance between you two that you've gotta work with what you have at the moment. Right now all you have are feelings and words.

"Now as your girlfriend." Yeji's head adjusts enough that you could see half of her face, but the other half still remains buried in her arm. "I'm telling you that you can never disappoint me." She chuckles in humor before turning her gaze away from her phone. "You don't know that, I'm not perfect-"

"I never said you were."

Silence sits between the two of you. Not once in your whole relationship had you intentionally interrupted Yeji when she was speaking, you strongly believed that everyone deserved a chance to speak their piece. But that had exceptions. Such as now. "I never said you were perfect, because you're not. You're human and you have your flaws but believe me when I say that you could never disappoint me, despite the fact that humans weren't designed to be perfect you still work on yourself everyday trying to polish all the rough edges, trying to better yourself not for anyone or anything but yourself because you really want to be better than you were in the past. How could I be disappointed in someone as noble as that?"

You notice that she's now actively fighting to keep her eyes open and you smile. "You okay for now?" She nods and you continue. "Then go to sleep, God knows you both need and deserve a good night's rest. I'll call you back tomorrow when you wake up, so you can tell me about everything else your sleep addled brain forgot to tell me tonight."

Yeji uncovers the other half of her face and eyes stare at her screen that shows your face, now more than ever she wishes she was there with you, to thank you and hold you for everything you've said and for the way you've calmed her down. She promises herself that once you meet back up in person, she'll make it up to you. But for now words will have to do.

"Thank you Y/N. I love you."

Your smile grows wider and Yeji swears she's ready to make a fool out of herself just to ensure that that smile never fades away from your face. You take your a moment to memorize the candid details of Yeji's face before replying. "I love you too Yeji. Good night." Both of you wave goodbye and as heavy of an action it was, you take the initiative to end the call because you know that if you left it up to your girlfriend she would never hit that End Call button.

--------------------------------------------------

Yeji places her phone on the nightstand by her bed.

Y/N lies back down properly on the bed.

The two stare straight ahead of them, eyes unfocused.

They take a deep breath before closing their eyes, ignoring the need that courses through their hearts.

"I'll be with her soon enough."

--------------------٩(◕‿◕｡)۶--------------------

A/N: I think this is the longest fic I've written on this app? Why the hell is there too little ITZY content on this app? it feels like drought istg 😭😭

#Hwang Yeji x Reader #ITZY #itzy x reader #Hwang Yeji #reader!insert

105 notes · View notes

catzula · 4 years ago

Text

》 Kiss it better

a/n: 200 followers guys, thank you so much for that! I feel like I should do something to celebrate, but I have literally no ideas. If you have any suggestions, please tell me!

Pairing: Kuroo Tetsurou x fem!reader

Warnings: Bullying -a lot-, angst, tons and tons of fluff

》Synopsis: You, one of Nekoma’s cheerleaders, made a bet with the captain of the Nekoma Volleyball team, that they’re going to lose to Aoba Jouhsai in the upcoming match. And- you’re failing chemistry.《

"Sensei, please don't do this." You begged. "I really want to go!"

Your teacher's eyes wandered on your pleading face, and she sighed.

"I don't get any say in this. You're failing chemistry, and if you don't pass this make-up exam, I can't let you go to the match."

You knew her answer was final, so you sighed, trying not to cry. This was supposed to be your first match, and you couldn't even go! "At least let me attend the training? Just so that if a miracle happens, I'll be ready?"

She shrugged. "If you think you can pass the exam and attend training, why not? I don't really care what you do, to be honest, as long as you pass."

Yeah, that's not happening, you thought but held your tongue.

"Oh, come on, don't look so grim. You're a smart girl, I'm sure you'll do it."

Though it did feel nice having her believe in you, you just couldn't be as positive as she was, but you managed to fake a smile. "Yeah, I'm sure it'll be okay. I still have to go back before I'm too late, though." This was the first time you were going to train in your cheerleading outfit, and you were too excited to see it on yourself.

She sent you a sympathetic look as she ruffled your hair slightly and went her way. You sighed. Chemistry was something you just weren't able to comprehend. Regardless of how much you studied that damn subject, you could swear you just got worse.

You quickly changed into the bright red two-piece outfit, it had black stripes on the sides and a big NEKOMA right on your chest. The black and red skirt was a little too short for your liking, but who were you to complain? You were just happy you even got to wear it.

"You're late." The captain told you as she saw you entering the gym. The rest of the team was already in their places, practicing, but stopped when they too noticed you.

"I'm sorry, I was with sensei." You apologized with a smile. "What did she say?" She asked, her large, green-blue eyes looking at you curiously. She was the same age as you, though she had a way of making you feel... smaller next to her.

"I- uh..." You looked at the girls that stared back at you with slightly narrowed eyes, making you feel a bit self-conscious. "I- I'm failing chemistry, so I have to take the exam next week. She told me I can't go to the match if I fail."

You thought the topic would be over, but apparently not. "And?" She asked, confusing you with the question. "And?" You repeated.

"Are you going to fail?" She questioned, looking at you like it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I hope not." You faked a giggle, feeling uncomfortable under the gaze of the girls, judging you.

"You should tell us if you're going to fail, you know. So that we can add you to the choreograpyh."

"O-oh, don't worry." I'm sure I'll do fine." Oh, you were anything but sure, though you figured it was better if you didn't tell her that.

"Good. Then get to your position. You have the choreography memorized, right? Last time you were a bit... sloppy." You tried to ignore one of the girls giggling. "Yeah, I know it all by now."

Finally, she smiled. You weren't sure if the smile was genuine or not, but just seeing her smile made you feel relaxed. "That's really nice, Y/N-chan!" She clapped her hands to gain attention. "Now, let's start before the volleyball team comes."

Everybody knew that was the opposite of what she actually wanted since her crush on the volleyball team's captain was now more than known, but you chose not to call her out. You knew she wasn't a fan of you already, so it was better to keep your mouth shut, you decided.

You didn't know why, but the girls seemed to have something against you since they always did their best to exclude you from things, though you tried not to think much about it.

When the captain started to count, you stopped thinking and danced along instead.

***

"Aah- that was tiring. She's too ruthless sometimes!" A girl from your team exclaimed as she sipped on her water, eyeing the pretty captain. The captain was known to be one of the prettiest girls in school and was frequently asked out by guys, though most were aware she only had eyes for one man. It had been a big surprise to everyone when Kuroo had rejected her, though.

Almost every girl in school had a crush on Kuroo, thinking of him as this cool, cold guy that had rejected even the prettiest girl in school, but in reality, he was just too busy with volleyball and his lessons. To be fair, you wouldn't have known he was a huge dork either if you weren't in the same class with him and had this weird friendship/arch enemy thing going on, either.

You weren't exactly friends with him, though. More like bickering constantly, but also having weird inside jokes. You were close but also...not friends. Maybe that was why the girls didn't like you, since you always argued with the guy they wanted to date. But it wasn't your fault he was too much fun to tease!

Teasing Kuroo was something you couldn't stop yourself from doing, and you weren't the only one that liked to make fun of the other, since Kuroo always managed to pick a fight with you, too. It wasn't genuine arguments, more like challenges, dares and bets, -you joining the cheering team was a dare you had with Kuroo, too- and because of the constant challenges you had with their captain, the volleyball team loved you, too.

"I think they're coming!" A girl whisper-yelled, causing everyone's eyes to turn to the door. She was right since the loud laughs, footsteps, and jokes were hard to miss as they approached the gym door.

Kuroo was the first to enter, his hair as messy as ever, one of his arms was on Kenma's head, just showing how much longer he was than him.

You watched as Kenma's eyes averted to the big group of girls watching them, his eyes widening with anxiety as he turned his gaze immediately to the ground, causing his hair to fall in his face and hide him.

"Oh, hey Kuroo-Kun!" The captain exclaimed with a bright smile as she went towards them, hopping like a bunny.

"Hey." He greeted her back, the sleazy smile on his face causing your heartbeat to double, even though you didn't want to admit. "I thought you said you were going to be done with training by four." You knew Kuroo didn't mean it negatively, though the captain looked like she was panicking, looking around frantically to find a good excuse.

"Ah, w-we have a newbie, you see. We kinda had to move slower for her to catch up." She finally answered as her eyes found yours, though instantly turned back to Kuroo's cat-like ones.

You grimaced at the sudden attack, trying to stop yourself before you blurted out that she was lying. You understood why she would do so, but you hated it when people used you in their lies. "Oh, a newcomer," Kuroo muttered, his eyes wandering in the room lazily, as he tried to find your figure. Of course, Kuroo knew you were new in the team, he was the one who challenged you in the first place, but the cheerleading team didn't know that, and neither of you had the intention to tell them.

"She just came, so she's still pretty slow." The captain continued with a small giggle, her words making your heart sink. It was true, you were new, but you had been practicing the last few weeks, and you had almost caught up with the rest, so it wasn't fair of her to say so.

Though Kuroo seemed to pay her no mind, instead, he walked towards you with a grin on his face. "New meat!" He joked -it was really bad, though you managed to force a laugh out- and the captain followed him, now both standing next to you and watching your every move like animals watching its prey.

Kuroo seemed like he wanted to chat with you, though before he could do so, the captain sighed. "Though we're not sure if she's even going to be able to come to the match."

Your eyes narrowed, but you chose to stay silent.

"Why is that?" Kuroo asked, confusion evident on his face with the sudden and unwanted information. "Oh, she's failing chemistry, so sensei didn't let her come to the match."

"If I fail the exam, I won't be able to come." You added when she talked about it like you had already failed. "Oh, yeah! That's what I said." She told you with an innocent smile.

You would have said something, but before you could do so, you heard the familiar sound of a volleyball hitting the ground. The captain's eyes gazed at Lev, who had just done a spike and was screaming victoriously. "Guess that means our time is over." She giggled like what she said was funny.

"The practice is over girls, go get some rest!" She ignored the grunts of relief coming from your team and turned back to Kuroo. "You know, it was nice seeing you. Don't you think we should do this more often?"

You really didn't want to hear them flirting, so you went to change your clothes without saying anything to them.

***

You were the last one to finish changing and stepped out of the room as you tried to detangle your headphones. You were so concentrated on doing so, that you didn't even see the boy leaning to the wall, watching you.

"Hey," he muttered, making you shriek in surprise. The way your widened eyes looked at him, he couldn't help but giggle.

"What the fuck, Kuroo!" You exclaimed, trying to get the shock wash away as you breathed deeply. "Hey, I'm the 6'2 (187 cm for people like me hehe) one here, how should I know you're dumb enough not to see me?"

"How should I know you would creep up on me like that?" You shot back, and although you knew it was kind of your fault, you weren't going to admit that to him.

He looked at you with a fake I'm offended look. "First of all, I didn't creep up on you."

"Then what are you doing here?" You asked, though your voice was a little softer this time. He hadn't actually waited for you, did he? No, he wouldn't do that, unless...unless he wanted to tease you about the chemistry thing.

You sighed as you finally understood why he was here, looking at you with that lazy smile and taking your breath away in the process. "Ah, look if you're here about me failing chemistry, please shut it." You told him as you rolled your eyes. "The captain already had a lot to say about it." You murmured, your words not really intended for him to hear.

"Well," his hand went to the back of his neck, blush dusting his cheeks ever so slightly, his odd hair falling to his face, making you wonder what would it feel like if you were to run your finger through them. Would it be soft? Spiky? Or maybe-

"I was actually going to tell you I could... uh... help you with that, ya know." The lazy smile now resembling a little boy's grin, you would have thought he was embarrassed if you didn't know better.

Your narrowed eyes found his, trying to understand the motive behind his words. " What do you mean, help me with that?"

He giggled at your question. He had an expression on his face, one you were so used to see, though couldn't yet understand what it meant. It kind of looked like he wanted to ruffle your hair and pinch your cheeks, but not quite. "Help you with chemistry, how else?"

You bit your lip, trying to find out what he was up to. "And what are you getting out of it?" You finally asked as you gave up trying to understand him.

"I’m a good person too, you know." He told you with a huff, he still had his teasing manner, though. "Can’t I be doing this out of my goodness?" If it were anyone else saying this, you might have believed them, but not with Kuroo. Sure, you joked around and teased each other, but your whole friendship -if you could call it that- was based on challenges, bets, deception, and who would trick who.

"No way I'll believe that. I'm not dumb, you know." You murmured the last bit since it kind of bothered you since it seemed like everybody thought so.

"Though you're failing chem, arent you?" He teased, causing you to send him a glare. "I-"

You were ready and steady to fight with him over that comment, but he only giggled and put his hand on your shoulder as if he was trying to steady or calm you. His hand was unconventionally warm, fingers calloused and hard, though it didn't bother you the slightest bit. It was rather scary how much you enjoyed his touch.

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding." He told you, laughing as he shook his head side to side. "You're too easy to rile up, ya know? I'm offering to help since it's me who challenged you to join the cheering team, so you might kind of say it's my fault at this point."

When you kept looking at him, he furrowed his brows. "I'm telling you I'm just feeling guilty! It's nothing too complicated." He looked rather hurt at how suspicious you looked.

"And?" You pressed on, knowing too damn well it wasn't only his conscious that led him to reach a helping hand at you. There had to be something else.

He sighed finally, obviously giving up. "And- I kinda wanna see you cheering for me." He grinned. "Call it 'satisfacting my ego'." He only grinned wider when you shot him a disgusted look.

"I knew there was something else." You just muttered.

"Eh," He shrugged. "I'm gonna need every boost I can have if I'm going to play against Oikawa." He said it so casually, you couldn't perceive what he said for a second or so.

"You're- you're playing against Aoba Jousai?" You blurted out, mouth agape. You hadn't even realized till now that you didn't even know who they were playing against. Clearly, he was thinking the same thing.

"You didn’t even know? And you're supposed to be our cheerleader." He clicked his mouth in a disapproving manner and shook his head side to side.

You ignored his remark. "There is no way you can win against him, you know."

He snickered at your blunt response. "I see you've become especially good at cheering and motivating."

You grinned. "Shoot me for telling the truth. It's Oikawa we're talking about."

"And? What about him?"

"He's one of the hottest and most talented men around, and you know it." You told him as you watched his grin fade to annoyance. "He's not hot!"

"No need to get all jealous, Kuroo." You giggled when he grimaced. "Me? Jealous of that- that... guy?!"

You shrugged just to piss him off.

"Well then, what will you do when we beat your oh-so-great Oikawa?" His playful grin was back, now wider than ever, and it pissed you off, how good he looked.

"Is that a bet?"

"Of course it is." He answered, like it was only normal.

"I'm not betting against my own team!" You exclaimed, feeling your cheeks heating up a bit. How did teasing him come to this, anyway?!

"What will you do?" He pressed on, and you were aware he wouldn't let it go until you bet with him, so you sighed as if you accepted defeat. "What do you want me to do?"

"Hmm," He tapped his chin as he considered the choices (he had been trying to make this bet with you for a week and had been planning how to get you to agree to it, it was surprisingly easy, though, since he was a mastermind at planning and stuff, even though he didn't show it much). His honey-colored eyes glistened when he decided what he wanted you to do. "You're gonna wear those cat ears for a week."

By those cat ears, he meant the ones that were a part of the cheering costume but were excluded since they were too hard to dance with. The first time you tried them on, Kuroo had laughed ten minutes straight and would've taken a photo if you hadn't ripped them off your head and threw them right in the middle of his face.

"Oh, it’s on." You shot back without thinking much about it. "Only if you wear them a week if you lose against them, too, though." You added with a smile that warmed his heart.

"Deal." He grinned.

You had no idea that he had been planning this for a long time, so what seemed like an innocent, fair bet was actually almost guaranteed you to lose. The penalty was the first thing he had thought about the bet, the rest came later to him, so he was literally planning how to get you to wear those cat ears for... a month. Not that you needed to know about that, though.

"Deal." You smiled.

***

You watched as Kuroo jumped, so high, that it made you wonder if he could secretly fly. His hand up in the air, coming down so fast to spike the ball. A grin was on his face, knowing damn well what you were probably thinking, as you watched him.

He smacked the ball with so much force, you gasped. You always knew he was strong, and he was fast -he was the Nekoma team captain, after all- but you never knew he was... this good.

When he landed back on his feet, looking at your flustered face was the first thing he did. Your mouth still slightly agape as you watched the ball that was now on the other side of the court, Kuroo thought it was one of the cutest things he saw.

"So," he asked with a cocky grin, "Still think Oikawa is better than me?"

You stood silent for a few seconds and then looked at his golden eyes. "Are you kidding me?!" You exclaimed, and just when he thought he was finally going to see you admitting he was, in fact, better than that Oikawa guy, you chuckled. "Oikawa could murder you, Kuroo. Don't get too full of yourself."

"What?" He asked in a rather cold voice that sent chills down your spine, though knowing it was just Kuroo, you ignored the threatening tone. "Don't try to intimidate me with that look, you asked the question, so you should be prepared for the answer, too."

"Did you- did you not see my spike just then? It was amazing!" You shrugged like it wasn't a big deal, knowing he was fuming inside. He was going to keep on arguing, if it wasn't for Lev, who was cheerfully calling out for you.

''Y/N-san, could you throw me some balls, too?" He told you when he came next to you in two long strides.

"Sure-" You answered, but Kuroo interrupted. "No."

It was the threatening, cold voice he used that always managed to frighten Lev, just a little bit. "But Kuroo-san! She's been throwing you balls the last hour!" He whined, making you giggle. "He's right, you know. It's only fair if I help him, too." You told Kuroo, desperately trying not to laugh when you saw him pouting.

"No! He can work with Kenma, I'm the one that's helping you with chemistry, aren't? So you should help me with this." He told you, his hand pulling you away from Lev and closer to himself.

"You're the one who suggested helping me! And you forced me to throw you balls, too."

You shook your head side to side when Kuroo ignored you. "Lev, you either go practice spikes with Kenma right now, or you're running laps the rest of the practice."

You saw Lev's eyes widening as he hurriedly walked towards Kenma, though muttering to himself, "This is no fair. He gets to practice with the pretty girl!"

Kuroo took another ball from the basket and gave it to you, though he was still pouting. "I can't believe you were really going to choose him over me. You should be happy you're getting to practice with me. But no, it's always someone else, isn't it?" He mumbled under his breath as you bit your lips to try and not laugh. You knew he was only joking, he always was.

You sent the ball to the air, just a bit over his head as he jumped and hit the ball, harder than the last time, and with the sound of his hand hitting the ball, you also heard a pained grunt coming from him.

He sat on the floor, clutching his hand to his chest, and you felt your heart beating rapidly in your chest at the sight. "K-Kuroo, what happened? Are you okay? We should go to the infirmary!"

You tried to get him to stand on his feet, but he shook his head side to side, rather pulling you to sit down next to him. "I'm okay," he told you with a small smile. "It came straight down on my finger, so it hurts a little, but it happens more than you would believe. I should just bandage it, putting some ice on it would help, too."

Hearing it wasn't a big deal did have its effect on your crazy heartbeat, slowing it a bit, but you were still worried more than you would like to accept. You stood up, quickly gathering some bandages and ice, and walked back to him.

As you took his hand and analyzed the finger, you noticed it was only a bit red and that he was right, it wasn't a big deal, but you were still mad at him. "What the fuck, Kuroo?!" You muttered angrily as you pressed the ice on his hand, he hissed with the sudden contact.

"I didn't do it on purpose!" He shot back.

"You have to be more careful! What if something else had happened? What if it wasn't just okay with ice and bandages?! The school and your team need you, you know they do!"

You sighed when he stayed silent. "I thought you wanted to beat Oikawa, and you can't do it injured. You want to wear those cat ears, I presume?" You joked, and he smiled.

"So you think I can beat him if I'm not injured, huh? I think it's you who wants to wear the cat ears."

You noticed your mistake, your cheeks burning slightly, but chose not to answer him since you knew he would just tease you further if you did. "Here you go, it's all better." You told him when you were done with bandaging.

"Aren't you gonna kiss it better?" He asked with a teasing grin, and you rolled your eyes. "In your dreams, you big baby."

"But it still hurts, Y/N! It can't get better if you don't kiss it! The team needs me, you said it yourself!"

"Kuroo," you groaned, but he just pointed at his cheek. "Come on, no need to be shy." That jerk and his stupidly good looking grin. You weren't really sure why, but you leaned in, your face getting closer to his cheek. You only noticed what you were actually doing when you were so close to him that you could smell the light scent of smell mixed with his natural, woody scent.

"You stink." You lied.

"But you were about to kiss it better!" He whined as you stood up, and internally screamed at yourself for actually considering kissing him. "Shut up, I'm tired. Just text me when you're done with the practice." You told him as you walked to the exit, you needed the fresh breath of air.

***

"I deem you beyond hope. These are the basics of chemistry. How -the fuck- are you so bad at them?"

"I don't know!" You groaned for the millionth time. "I just can't do it, okay?" He rolled his eyes when you pouted. Maybe you were acting a tad too childish, but no one liked to be reminded of how dumb they were, especially not from a guy as hot as him.

"Okay, okay." He finally said when you kept pouting. "Let's take a break." He didn't miss your cute smile when you heard the word 'break'.

"How are you so bad at it, anyway? You're not as bad in the other subjects..." He then realized he had no idea how your other subjects were. "Right?" He asked, this time a little less confident.

"No." You told him with a glare. "It's something between me and chemistry, we just don't get along." You sighed, and without thinking much about it, you added, "chem is a mystery to me." Not expecting his eyes to widen and gasp at your small word game, you quirked your brow. "What?"

"Did you- did you just do a joke?!" He looked so genuinely shocked, you pouted.

"I am capable of joking!" You answered his accusation, noticing his grin. "Huh," he mumbled, "Since you never laugh at mine, I thought you just didn't understand them."

"I'll strangle you, Kuroo." You answered though you were smiling. "You were about to kiss me an hour ago, what's with the attitude?" He teased, and he thought it was the best thing, how horrified you looked at the accusation.

"I- I didn't- I wasn't going to-" As you choked on your words, he was having the time of his life. You faked a cough to try and hide how flustered you were, a pathetic attempt, really.

"Huh? You weren't going to kiss me? Is that what you're saying? Are you a liar, too, Y/N-chan?"

"Kuroo, shut the fuck up." You mumbled when you finally found it in yourself to form words. "How rude, princess." He giggled, dropping the topic and not even realizing the effect the pet name had on you.

"Don't call me that, jackass." You tried to be as rude as you could to hide the soft part of you showing, but he noticed, he always did.

"What, princess?"

When you didn't answer him, he grinned and leaned a little closer to you. "Is it making you excited, princess?"

"No way!" You blurted out. "Why should I get excited over you? It's just- weird." You answered, and he didn't press it on, though you could still feel his mocking eyes on you, grinning like the Cheshire cat.

***

"Hey!" You called out when you saw one small and one abnormally tall silhouette. "Kenma, Lev, could you guys help me out a bit?" You had two large boxes on your hands, hiding your face from them, but they instantly knew who you were.

"What are you doing?" Lev asked as he took the larger box from you, Kenma was holding one of the small boxes you had left behind to get on a second trip.

"Oh, it's the cheerleading equipment, they asked me if I could take them."

"All of them?" Kenma asked, a brow quirking questioningly. "Yeah, you know, being new and stuff I guess." You told with a little giggle.

"Yeah, no." Kenma told you with a monotone voice. "It's not being new and stuff, and don't think we missed how they're acting towards you." He looked at Lev. "Even he noticed it."

"Hey, what does that mean?!"

"They're not the kindest people around, that I admit." You answered. "But it's not unbearable, so..." You sent him a cheeky grin.

Kenma shrugged. "Whatever you say, just know what they're doing is not normal, and it's probably just gonna get worse."

You knew he was right, but the topic made you uncomfortable, so you just shrugged.

***

Hanging out with Kuroo was fun, you had to admit. Even though you were just studying, it was too much fun.

"How are you feeling? Are you stressed? Do you think you're ready? Do you think you'll pass? Oh my god, why am I so stressed?!" Kuroo blabbered on as he shook you by your shoulders with every word. "I'm okay, Kuroo. I'm feeling pretty good, actually, I think I'm ready."

He looked at you with worried eyes, though they looked a bit more relieved than they were just then.

"Okay, then. Go break a leg? Is that what you're supposed to say in situations like this?" Oh, shoot. Did he have to look so damn cute, worrying over you?

You chuckled as you shrugged, ignoring the warm feeling spreading through your body. "I'm not sure. You knew you didn't have to come all the way here, though, right?" He had insisted that he was going to drop you to the exam, and wait until you came back. He said he might even buy you a slice of cheesecake after if it went well, and who were you to say no?

"I wanted to come." He looked at his phone screen to check the hour. "Okay, you have to go now, but I'll be right here."

You weren't sure why, but that sentence filled you with a confidence you never knew you had. You felt like... you felt like if he was right here, supporting you, you could even overcome your greatest enemy, chemistry.

"Y-yeah, okay." You mumbled, turning around to go to school, but stopped when he suddenly shouted, "Wait!" You turned around, worried there was something you forgot -there was always something you forgot- but your worries died when you saw him grinning.

"Aren't you gonna ask for a good lucks kiss?"

"Oh my god, Kuroo." You rolled your eyes, once again turning to go, but this time he didn't let you walk away, not without a hug. "Well then, here's a good luck hug instead." As you felt his long arms around your body, you froze in your place, forgetting to even breathe.

He was warm, not a disturbing warm, though, the kind that caused you to smile, that made you feel safe, that made you think if he kept his arms around you, nothing bad could happen. So instead of pulling back, you wrapped your arms around him too, closing your eyes with the feeling and not even realizing that you were nuzzling your face in his neck.

You didn't notice the relieved smile that was on his face when you hugged him back, since he was half-sure you were going to push him away, he closed his eyes too and wrapped you even tighter, trying to etch this feeling in his mind so he could remember forever.

You could feel his face touching your hair, your bodies pressed together, you wondered if he could hear how hard your heart was beating. When he pulled back after a while, you felt a bit disappointed that it ended but hid that expression nonetheless. Now you couldn't stop thinking just how good he smelled and felt.

"Uh, thanks for that, I guess." You told him with an awkward giggle. "Sure thing, all you gotta do is ask, princess." He told you with a wink, causing you to roll your eyes and walk away.

***

Kuroo was a man of his word, so he waited two hours on exactly where you both had hugged each other.

When he realized he could still feel your lingering scent when the wind blew slightly and smiled, Kuroo knew he was in deep. He had never meant for it to go this way, he liked this weird thing you both had, constant teasing and challenging each other. He had no idea when he had caught feelings, but Kuroo wasn't a simple man, he knew that when he had feelings towards someone, it was too damn hard for him to let go.

He couldn't stop thinking about the hug that had passed just then, how you felt between his arms, how amazing you smelled, how good of a fit you two were.

So when he saw you exiting the school, he couldn't (didn't) suppress the smile that was forming on his face, and it only grew wider when you smiled back.

"How was it?" He asked when you came towards him. "It was gre-" Before you could finish your sentence, you found yourself pulled into a tight hug once again, though this time you didn't fight it one second.

"That's very nice to hear." He muttered into your hair, and you giggled. "I remember a promise about a cheesecake." You told him with a cheeky smile when his arms let go of your figure, that looked tiny next to him.

"Huh, cheesecake? Nope, can't think of anything related to that."

"Kuroo!" You whined.

"What? I don't even like cheesecake! How could I have known your exam was going to be okay when you suck this bad at chemistry?" He protested.

He still took you to eat cheesecake, and not only one slice, but as much as you'd liked.

"So, you're gonna cheer for me, huh?" He told you as he watched you chew on the giant piece of cake you had just gotten in your mouth. You could swear he was only asking questions when you were chewing, cause it was a little too often his questions had caught you munching on food, at this point.

You glared at him as he shot you an innocent look, he grinned like a mad man the whole time you tried to swallow your bite. "I don't know, I haven't decided yet." You finally answered.

"You can't tell me you're going to cheer for that Oikawa guy." He huffed, though you knew he was damn serious at his question. "No, I'm going to cheer for Lev." You shot back, and he groaned.

"You're forgetting that I'm paying for all these." He grinned, causing you to choke on the bite you just took. He laughed and passed you the water, watching you drink it down.

"Yeah, you're right." You told him with a cheeky grin.

***

"Oh, shit, I'm so fucking stressed, I'm going to die." Yaku mumbled. "You don't have to be stressed, Yaku-san! You practiced so much, I know you're going to win!" Your captain cheered excitedly. (you forgot about her, didn't you, haha)

Huh, you thought. Maybe Kuroo was right about you sucking at giving motivation.

"Thanks." Yaku mumbled with an awkward smile, trying to escape from her overly cheerful manner.

"Kuroo-san, how are you feeling?" She asked as she walked towards him, making the girls in your team giggle with anticipation. "I'm okay, thanks." He mumbled, his eyes searching through the crowd, stopping when they found you. Without even noticing that the cheerleader captain was talking to him, he walked towards you with a mocking grin on his face.

"I need to get my good luck kiss before I go on the court, you know. And this time, I'm not settling for a hug." It might have been something you could laugh at, if you weren't in public and both of your teams weren't looking at you, mouths agape, eyes widened with shock.

You could hear Kenma face-palming himself.

"Sh-shut it, Kuroo! It's not the time for teasing." You told him, feeling your cheeks heating up.

"Come on, just one kiss." He continued as he leaned in, caging you and leaving you breathless. You knew he was joking, but no one else did, and sometimes, you weren't so sure either, especially when he looked at you like that.

So you did the best thing you could.

You ran away.

Not bothering to look back or answer his questions, you ran until you couldn't see him. You had no idea how you were going to explain this to your team, especially to the captain. She didn't like you already, and this was probably just going to make everything worse.

So you stayed there until you heard Nekoma being called out on the court, leaving the room half-heartedly, scared of what you were going to face.

You could feel the lingering eyes on you, hear the whispers following you, and you did your best to ignore them, but you knew you could break down crying any second now. When you saw the captain glaring at you, you bit your lip, trying to focus on the dance.

You could feel the boys looking at you to see if you were okay or not, trying to get you to look at them too, but you refused to do so since you were a little scared of what you would see.

Though the whispers and glares toned down and died when the game started since the game took all your attention. You watched as Kenma passed the ball to Lev, he jumped so high and hit the ball so hard, you gasped. The ball passed between Aoba Jouhsai and Nekoma, neither of them looking like they were going to accept losing.

You could see everyone giving their bests, even Kenma looked fired about the game, Lev blocking the ball like his life depended on it, Oikawa using tricks and strategies that just amazed you.

The game was breathtaking, every touch on the ball had you gasping, making you sit on the edge of your seat, turning your knuckles white.

The only times you could hear the whispers running after you were the times there were breaks, and the cheerleading team was dancing on the court.

Wasn't this supposed to be fun? It felt like torture, instead. You could feel your teammates nudging you with an elbow every once and then, causing you to lose your balance, snickering when you stumbled. At this point, you were just counting minutes till the game ended.

Kuroo must've noticed something was wrong since, at one point, he started to wave at you until you saw him, and when you looked at him, he sent you a thumbs up as if he was trying to ask if you were okay, not noticing he was the problem.

You just plastered a smile on your face and nodded your head, trying to make him go back to the game. He sent you a cheeky grin in response, now more determined to win more than ever.

The game went on, and it was finally the third and the last set. To give the team more of a boost, the cheerleading was going on on the side of the court.

You would've enjoyed this, you really would, if it weren't for the now rougher pushes you've been getting from the other girls. It was starting to hurt, you had to admit, and not only physically, too. No one liked being laughed at, especially when they had no one to help them get through this, and you were feeling more alone then you have ever felt before.

Though all your thoughts disappeared when you saw Kuroo jumping with all his might and hitting the ball Kenma had just sent him. The ball went straight down, without anyone on the other side of the net being able to receive it.

He had scored the match point. They won, you realized.

Your eyes wide, hands up in the air, shaking the black and red pompoms in your hand as you cheered with the rest of your team, beaming with happiness.

You suddenly noticed the cat-like eyes on you, and your eyes found him too. He was grinning widely, everyone around him screaming with victory, and it somehow felt like the time had stopped as you looked at each other. His arms were wide open as if he was inviting you for a hug, his lips were moving like he was trying to tell you something, and you focused your gaze on is lips, narrowing your eyes and leaning a bit closer-

You felt a sharp pain on the side of your body, leaving you breathless for a second or more, making your eyes water, and because you were leaning forward and your focus was fully somewhere else, you couldn't find your balance, falling forward.

You would've fallen right on your face if you hadn't put your hand on the ground in instinct, but now it was your hand and your ankle which had twisted badly when you fell, that had taken the blow. You looked up, just to find one of the girls looking at you with an uninterested pout, though you weren't sure who it was that had pushed you.

You could feel your eyes stinging with tears unshed, your ankle and wrist throbbing with pain, and it wasn't even the pain that caused you to tear up. You felt so self-conscious, falling in front of all these people, in front of him, you wanted to run away.

Trying to stand up, you gasped as you felt the pain in your ankle, just making the stinging in your eyes and the lump in your throat worse. You knew you would've fallen once again if it wasn't for the sudden support under your arms.

You couldn't recognize him for a second with the cold, almost scary look he had on his face, his eyes looking threateningly sharp as he helped you stand on your legs, walking you out of the gym.

Neither of you talked until you were finally alone in a room, and he had sat you on the bench. He sat right next to you, and the silence was unbearable, but you knew the second you attempted to talk, you would break down crying.

He somehow seemed to know that, so instead of trying to make you talk, you felt his hands wrapping you in a tight hug, and that was when you lost control over your emotions. You couldn't help the tears running down your face, wetting your cheeks, the sobs shaking your body between his arms, your arms hugging him even tighter as you replayed everything in your mind.

"I'm sorry," you managed to mumble between your sobs, "I'm so sorry, Kuroo." You didn't know why exactly you were apologizing, maybe it was because he had to be here with you instead of celebrating his victory, or maybe something else.

You stopped apologizing when you felt his hand touching your hair so softly, you almost couldn't feel it. "Shh," he whispered, "it's okay, no need to be sorry."

You nodded, you weren't even sure how long you stayed in that position, but you had already stopped crying when he talked again. "Are you feeling better now?"

You nodded, not even trying to pull back since it felt too good to be between his arms. His hand was still caressing your hair, though it was a little different this time since you felt something sliding between your hair, something that suspiciously felt like a headband with a pair of cat ears.

You tried to suppress your smile, but couldn't, so you just giggled. "You asshole." You mumbled and felt the laughter bubbling in his chest.

"I love you too, princess."

Epilogue:

You were sitting on the couch as Kuroo gathered the snacks. It was movie night, though as you surfed through the channels, you found something even more interesting.

"Baby, come quick! It's live from Oikawa's game." You told him as you watched the game a little too closely, Kuroo noticed. As an attempt to keep his girl, Kuroo sat right next to you on the couch, an arm wrapped around your shoulders. You could feel him pulling you closer and closer to himself every time you gasped or cheered for Oikawa until you were almost on top of him.

"Tetsu, are you jealous?" You finally asked, desperately trying to hold yourself from laughing at his pouting face.

"Jealous? Why would I be jealous?" You were going to say something, but he answered his own question. "Because my girlfriend is far more interested in a guy on tv than her boyfriend that's sitting right next to him?"

"I'm not interested in him!" You protested, trying to ignore the amazing spike Oikawa just did, but he noticed it. Pouting and looking away -though not attempting to get away from you whatsoever- he looked like a little boy.

"Ah, come on, you know you'll always be my number one." You told him with a giggle, and you knew when you pecked his cheek with a light kiss, he couldn’t stay mad at you.

"You know, you really hurt my feelings there." He muttered though he was grinning as he leaned his face closer to yours.

"Did I?" You asked with an equally cheeky grin, and he nodded, now even closer that you could feel the heat radiating from him.

"I kinda need you to kiss it better."

Kiss it better, you did.

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