#$13 idk where he is getting these ideas of prices from but it is not expensive

[californiaquail]

today my boss told me off for: using the chlorhexidine scrub to clean the surgical instruments and scrubbing the whole instrument instead of just the end that got bloody. my bad tbh i will never try to do a good job again

[msbhagirathi]

IPKKND LIVE BLOG SEASON 1 [Epi 5]

Let'z welocme Shyam today. *sarcasm intended* (-_-) (I know I wrote the wrong spelling by mistake but then I noticed it and thought let it be. Who cares. Shyam himself won't come here to correct me.)

There, I gave you the biggest spoiler of the episode, in advance to ruin your mood.

Heh. I am evil.

Now don't leave without reading it, okay? I do a lot of mehnat into writing these. :')

Come. Let'z begin this then *sighs irritated-ly*

Arnav's manager shows him the live news with the footage, being telecasted in some channel. (Kamlesh Khabri ji, was that yours ? Lol.)

2. Did you-too- wonder about that 'smart' phone, Arnav was holding? Turns out, I could find it.

3. "Aaj ka saajan" Lmao. (Today's lover)

4. Arnav, while watching that clip, being telecasted, flashes back to the line Khushi said last, before leaving. "Devi maiyya ki marzi ke bina koi kuch bhi nahi kar sakta, koi Arnav Singh Raizada bhi nahi." (No one can do anything without Devi-Maiyya's wish, not even some Arnav Singh Raizada.")

5. Basically, he is thinking, that, he has shown her place to 'that girl', who had said that he can't do anything without some 'devi maiyya's wish'.

6. This is clear in his reply to Akash's protest for over paying MR . "Meri beizatti karne ki himmat naa kabhi kisi ne ki hai, naa ab koi karega." (No one, has ever disrespected me, nor anyone would, now, have the guts to.) Oh. So, the problem is your ego issue.

I should have known it. Khushi had the misfortune to meet you and now she is paying the price with her reputation and dignity, being butchered like animal slaughtering. You, a__hole.

7. Khushi and her Amma are getting molested by a bunch of perverts.

8. Babuji tries to stop them, but he gets a hard push, which results in Shashi losing his balance and his head hits a nearby pole.

9. The men are very adamant and one of them tugs at Khushi's dupatta.

10. There. A man, wearing, a beautiful shiny brown pair of office shoes, with a matching pair of trousers, is shown stepping down from somewhere. He starts walking (towards the scene?)

11. A Turquoise bracelet gleaming in his right wrist. (why the fck isn't he wearing his wedding ring?) He is shown from behind some -shops?- He walks upto where babuji had fallen down. He helps him to stand up.

12. Wow. Daiyya Ho! What an entry.

13. Everything aside. Aabhaas looks so fckin handsome in that outfit. Everything. Literally, everything about his look is so freaking perfect. The colour combo of the shirt and pant. The shoes. Oh. God. I am in love with those shoes.

IDK. It's just looks so- fantastic?-deliciously beautiful?- I am simping for those, quite literally. Is it normal for some human to simp on a pair of shoes? Whatever. So. Yeah. I was talking about the look. The flare of the pant, as he walks. His haircut. Like. Wow. Absolutely ravishing.

14. And he starts beating those mfs, one by one.

15. After beating those hooligans. He walks back to Babuji, to check up on him. He tells him to get a band-aid for his cut. Babuji is touched by his words and thanks him for the help.

16. Then, Shyam turns to look at where Amma was standing but is transfixed to see Khushi shyly(hesitantly?) looking at him with tears in her eyes, from behind her Amma, just like any other rom-com film, only that, this isn't any other rom-com film. (the Sitar and Tabla BG score used, here, is so freaking beautiful and also kind of suits him coz it sounds something like wicked and graceful.)

17. We can see, he is caught off guard, by the way, Khushi is looking at him; by her beauty. He realizes her hesitation and picks up her fallen dupatta and offers it to her but Amma takes it back. He might have wanted to talk to her but, before that, he is pulled out of his trance, by babuji and they bid him a goodbye.

Khushi turns back to look at him, one last time. Only that, this isn't the last time, they would be meeting. Alas. Khushi as well as we, don't even have an idea about, the depth, of his obsession with Khushi that, will go, after this moment.

18. Look at the absolute contrast, in the way, they introduced both the anti-hero and the main villain. At this point, half of the audience might have already started shipping Shyam and Khushi.

19. The sequence, at Gomti Sadan, is so freaking emotional. Khushi is, again, getting punished for the crime that she didn't even commit. (Or until they think that she shouldn't have left the house at all.)

20. Even babuji cannot come to forgive her, this time. Garima decides to send, both of them, away to Delhi. Buaji, who always had an over-reaction for every situation, was, a minute ago, shouting at both of them to say or do something, to punish Khushi,(She really likes to see Khushi suffering. Bloody sadist.) is shocked. Lol. "Dilli kauno davaai ki pudhia thori haee, ki ghol ke pilaay dio. Sab theek." (Delhi isn't some bundle of medicines that dissolving it in water and making it drink someone, would cure everything.)

21. The moment she realizes that she has to take both of the girl's responsibility, she spits out the water from her mouth. Lmao. She tries to convince both of them but is not successful. Her discomfort is so visible, as she gets to taste the result of her instigation. LMAO. LMAO. LMAO. Buaji ab maza aaya? Lol.

22. Anjali comes in with a thaali, diya and some incense sticks burning. Arnav is immediately irritated at the sight of his Didi (initially he used to call her 'didi' then he resorted to 'Di').

23. She asks about whether he ever thought about the well-being of 'that girl' before creating such a huge ruckus and Arnav, I think, is caught off guard.

24. We are immediately taken to 'that girl', who is so innocent that she could not even think that her 'woh' had released those 'taswirein'.

25. She vows to find out who was the one to release them.

26. Deepali's foundation was so off, in this scene. (Literally, her face looks so pale.)

27. Payal asks Khushi, in a challenging(or admonishing?) way, that how will she find out, ready to scold her, for even mentioning to do something else, lest it worsens the already messy situation, they are in.

28. Screen cuts to Arnav, still in his thoughts (maybe regretting? Lol. No.) as he comes out of his reverie and says " Soch ke hi toh kiya tha." (It was a thought out move.)

29. Liar. (Liar, pants on fire. Lol.) No. You were not thinking when you ordered for those videos to be released, Arnav. Why are you lying then? Tell your Didi that you did it, in a fit of rage, to show 'someone' that you actually hold a lot of power. Bloody b_stard.

30. Lol. "Ab aap apna yeh 'naari mukti morcha', yahan mat nikaliye, yeh mera office hai." (Now, please don't start your 'Women's Liberation March' here, this is my office.)

31. Lmao. The brother-sister banter is so heart warming and fun to watch :)

32. Both Khushi and Payal reach the office of 'Khabrein 24x7' (News 24x7). Khushi, is nervous, and clutches Payal's hand in fear. Payal understands her distress and smiles victoriously, that now she will be able to convince her sister, to return back to their comfort zone.

33. But, her sister is more courageous than she seems to be. And, true to her nature, she tells Payal to take a seat and walks up to the reception, gulping nervously.

34. She asks to have a word with their company's 'maalik' (owner). But, the receptionist tells her, for that she would have to go to Delhi.

35. After a few minutes of deciding, when she wants to talk, to the receptionist again, she tells her to wait for sometime without paying any attention that she is 'the same girl'.

36. Sometime later, the workers of the office realize that Khushi is that 'TV wali ladki' and they start mocking her and make fun of her situation. They circle her in the center of the office and keep laughing.

37. Payal is disappointed and reduces to tears immediately, she quickly walks up to Khushi but loses the courage to take her out of it, as her feet get frozen, due to the nervous-ness, by all that negative attention, that, they are getting.

38. Khushi noticing, that her sister is getting affected by the mess that they have managed to land into, speaks up. She, while shedding tears, knocks some sense into them. And they are.....umm, immediately regretting it? No realization?

I mean to say that they could have shown them realizing their mistake, like, they could have taken some time? Then, that, 'sorry we were wrong' could have made much more sense. Did you too feel that? No? Only me? Ok. Leave it. (Pata nahi choro.)

39. So. Yeah. They 'feel' sorry immediately. And regret it. But, Khushi does not want their apology. She wants the answers which she had come for. They reveal that they got the orders from the higher authorities ('Woh clippings release karne ke orders upar se aaye the.')

40. Khushi asks who send them those clippings and is unsurprisingly shocked. I know. I don't make sense. But. Let me explain. See. She is so naive, that, she didn't even realize the extent of power and influence that ASR commands.

Just because, she got to 'talk' to him personally, in a fairly public place (The Dargah), without any appointment, in his own office, doesn't mean that he is not 'that' much influential. It's just, he chose to have a conversation about the topic with her. He could have easily ignored her. But, he didn't.

So, my point is, she could not even come to think that only he would be the one, who could do this, even after, getting into a heated argument with 'The ASR'. She had already started treating him like an acquaintance. Like, he is a random normal person, just like her. And, not some Business Tycoon of the Fashion Industry. She had already started treating him like an equal, like a normal person, of her 'status'.

41. So. She's shocked. Screen stops at her face. Precap begins. *quickly pauses it* Spoilers. (Although I had already watched it once earlier *smiles nervously* I am not a hypocrite, okay? I had watched it out of excitement.)Ok. Bye.

P.S. : No P.S. Bye. Have a great day/night ahead. God bless you.

Previous Next

[alnilaem]

thank you @ohbo-ohno for the tag <3 !!!! I’m throwing my no-pressure tags to @shotmrmiller, @yeyinde and @bitten-fruit and anyone else who wants to join!

1. How many works do you have on Ao3?

14, including an anonymous one and uploads from my old ao3 account

2. What's your total Ao3 word count?

24,237 😞 (on my current account)

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Call of Duty. I want to write for RDR2 eventually but I’m scared because I won’t give it justice, lol. Arcane is also on my list, maybe LotR, and maybe Bo will twist my rubber arm into writing TLoU too

4. Top three (because I don’t have enough fics) by kudos.

bury me beneath the basswood tree, never meet your heroes, [anonymous fic]

5. Do you respond to comments?

if one really gets to me, yeah! otherwise, no. but I appreciate them all nonetheless ❤️

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

ermmmm? it may be a tossup between bear country or never meet your heroes, because of the whole Johnny-being-left-limp-after-being-absolutely-mauled, lmao

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

it isn’t exactly happy, but bury me beneath the basswood tree. FMC is happy, albeit under Simon’s supernatural forces lmao

8. Do you get hate on fics?

nope

9. Do you write smut?

it’s all i write…….

10. Craziest crossover.

hate crossovers, sorry. I checked the LotR tag the other day and was SHOCKED at the amount of NARUTO crossovers. like, what?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

none that I know of

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

doubt it

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

i tried it and it FAILED because she ended up being a whole weirdo. i do, however, looooooove the idea. would love to see it through one day (with someone normal, preferably)

14. All time favorite ship?

Eren/Armin

15. What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

price/ex escort reader, where he keeps coming back for more but refuses to treat her like anything more than a vessel for his urges

16. What are your writing strengths?

um. similes…? maybe detail?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

dialogue, flow, speed, um let’s see–

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

i don’t read enough fics with this specific thing, so I don’t have any thoughts about it really. if the author finds a way to translate it not directly but through introspection? coolest thing EVER.

19. First fandom you wrote in?

marvel comics!

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

heughhhh idk ;; i always have post-fic clarity where I think I absolutely killed a fic when I may have, at the most, smothered it a bit

[cvttmutt]

fuck it im doing all of them :P Skip any you're uncomfortable with btw! /nf

0: Height

1: Age

2: Shoe size

3: Do you smoke?

4: Do you drink?

5: Do you take drugs?

6: Age you get mistaken for

7: Have tattoos?

8: Want any tattoos?

9: Got any piercings?

10: Want any piercings?

11: Best friend?

12: Relationship status

13: Biggest turn ons

14: Biggest turn offs

15: Favorite movie

16: I’ll love you if…

17: Someone you miss

18: Most traumatic experience

19: A fact about your personality

20: What I hate most about myself

21: What I love most about myself

22: What I want to be when I get older

23: My relationship with my sibling(s)

24: My relationship with my parent(s)

25: My idea of a perfect date

26: My biggest pet peeves

27: A description of the girl/boy I like

28: A description of the person I dislike the most

29: A reason I’ve lied to a friend

30: What I hate the most about work/school

31: What my last text message says

32: What words upset me the most

33: What words make me feel the best about myself

34: What I find attractive in women

35: What I find attractive in men

36: Where I would like to live

37: One of my insecurities

38: My childhood career choice

39: My favorite ice cream flavor

40: Who I wish I could be

41: Where I want to be right now

42: The last thing I ate

43: Sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately

44: A random fact about anything

THIS IS SO EXCITING TYY :3

0. 5'7"

1. 16

2. X

3. Sometimes if I'm bored I take my dad's cigarette butts

4. I wish

5. I'm actually 2 months sober off marijuana! :D

6. If I've ever been mistaken for an age I haven't been told but I guess I do look a lot younger than 16

7. nope

8. Yes!! I definitely want some matching ones with my best friend when we're older

9. Only ear piercings unfortunately

10. Yess I want my lip pierced, my eyebrow pierced, and maybe some more ear piercings

11. Hes not on here but I've been trying to get him!! He's a shedtwt user 😢

12. Single!! If anyone has a crush on my cuts dm me I don't bite (unless you want me to)

13. X

14. Whenever someone misuses you/you're and their/there/they're

15. Smile tbh.. and I just watched it for the first time a few days ago

16. You carry the conversation but still enjoy talking to me

17. My best friend 😢 (he's a text away)

18. My dad almost beat my grandpa to death with a hammer LMAO I don't think I've actually fully thought about that

19. I'm very anxious irl!! I act like a loser

20. I can't talk to strangers without stuttering and its not even a cute stutter I mispronounce every single word I hatteee it

21. Im good at art ig

22. X

23. Love them even if we fight a lot

24. Honestly I'm eh with my parents but also I'm a teenager and it's normal to hate them at this time so

25. Having lots of fun, no worries about prices, no worries about time limits

26. Refer to question 14

27. Blonde, chubby, SO PRETTY AND BEAUTIFUL

28. 5'4" twink with commitment issues

29. So they don't worry about me

30. Having to sit on my phone the entire time, or having a really hard assignment I can't do.

31. "That's freaking fire"

32. X

33. Any praise

34. Not an asshole, gives me attention

35. Not an asshole, gives me attention

36. Washington or maybe somewhere in Europe but idk if that's happening cuz I'm BROKE

37. X

38. Astronaut. I still want to be an astronaut deep down but realistically that's never happening 😭 My grades r ass and I come from a poor household so that means no fancy college and I can't just pay to see the stars

39. Chocolate!!

40. A four year old boy

41. Right where I am right now

42. Mashed potatoes with onion gravy

43. X

44. Ankylosaurus' tails are so strong they can break their own bones just swinging them

[snootlestheangel]

Soap

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

13. What's an emoji, an emoticon and/or any symbol that reminds you of this character or you think the character would use a lot?

Gaz

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

5. What's the first song that comes to mind when you think about them?

Ghost

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

2. Favorite canon thing about this character?

Price

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

1. Why do you like or dislike this character?

Nik

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

22. If you're a fic reader, what's something you like in fics when it comes to ths character? Something you don't like?

Kate

12. What's a headcanon you have for this character?

15. What's your favorite ship for this character? (Doesn't matter if it's canon or not.)

Soap

12. My headcanon is that he's horrible to live with. There's a lot of evidence in the campaign stories to kinda imply that he's not shy about getting dirty and I feel like that's just cause he is. He just doesn't keep a clean area at home when he's off duty. Part of it might be he doesn't feel pressured by the demands of military living, but idk. He's terrible about cleaning up after himself, hardly does the dishes, doesn't really clean. And I also feel like he's incredibly loud at home. Like he stomps. You cannot tell me this man doesn't stomp everywhere. I'm sorry, I just refuse to believe he wouldn't. He just isn't aware he's being that loud, definitely. And if you were to say something he's definitely taking it seriously and being more conscious of his noise level.

13. 🫡 avid user of the salute emoji. It feels right

Gaz

12. A nerd. He's a big fan of DND. He's the type of gamer to play all the Halo games on the hardest difficulty like it's nothing. Absolutely was the type of kid to get in trouble for staying up late gaming. His mother definitely had a moment where she's complaining about him playing games all the time and he definitely (being the sassy bastard he is) bites back with "at least I'm not doing drugs or committing crimes". Of course one of his sisters calls out the execution thing they witnessed in one of his games. His mom gave up, cause at least he isn't doing drugs.

5. I have no idea tbh.

Ghost

12. You know that trend of girls and stuff being like "my man sleeps like those paintings of a passed out maiden"? Ghost would be one of those guys. Armed draped dramatically over his face and other on his belly. A dramatic sleeper

2. That he's actually so chill. If I'm remembering this correctly, in the comics he's like being really gentle with kids. He called a hostage "love", he's telling terrible dad jokes to his teammate to help him stay sane during a really stressful situation. He's just actually out here vibing

Price

12. I feel like he snacks on the weirdest things but also like they're still perfectly normal things to snack on. Like celery? Good snack, especially dipped in something or with peanut butter. Price? Just monching straight celery. Like apply that to most other snacks and that's Price being weird

1. He's such a cocky piece of shit and I love it. He's intelligent and cunning and dangerous and holy fuck- *I'm gonna stop talking*

Nik

12. Doesn't have any surviving family, but if he did, they'd still be hella close. It just feels like he gets his fierce loyalty from his family. It feels like he's the type of person to be like "we're family, of course I got your back" and it's something he has because he grew up in a family very much like that

22. I love when people really explore the sketchy side of Nik. Like the fact he's got connections that he really shouldn't. I don't really read enough with Nik in it so I don't know what I wouldn't like. There's the obvious and general "diminishing this complex character to a single trait or characteristic and calling it a day" when he's playing a more centric role in the story.

Kate

12. Used to be a heavy smoker, but quit after a while. Started smoking in high school and smoked well into adulthood. Eventually stopped when she realized how it was affecting her health. She occasionally still has a cigarette every now and then but it's more of a test of her self control at this point

15. Her wife! I don't know, but I am fiercely protective of her status as a married woman and her wife!!

[lastoneout]

So the vet gave us some nausea, anxiety, and sleep meds to make the next two weeks more comfortable for my dog, you know just long enough to last until The Appointment, cuz he's clearly having a really bad time, but part of me was kinda hoping he might actually start doing better(and the vet said she thought he really might) and it's really sucking to realize they aren't doing anything at all.

(readmore cuz this got very sad and long sorry)

'Cuz so far the nausea meds seem to be making him throw up more?? Or at least he's throwing up just as much as he was before we gave them to him, and despite him being on a pretty hefty dose of anxiety and sleep meds not only is he STILL pacing all night(which keeps us awake bcs it's loud) he's pacing EVEN MORE and I can tell the meds are doing something bcs he's clearly inebriated but it's not helping him sleep it's just making it so as he paces he runs into everything and falls over a bunch which is making tons of noise...

It's just really hard to watch, cuz it highlights how much he's suffering, and that's just the puking and the pacing, he's also almost bitten me(which he's NEVER done before) when I was just trying to clean off his paw cuz he stepped in the throw up, and he also keeps snarling at my fiancé and he's got trauma from a severe dog bite he had as a child so that's not ideal to say the least, and he keeps going to the bathroom on our back porch instead of waiting until he gets onto the dirt and like...I just am starting to wonder if deciding to put off saying goodbye for two weeks was like really selfish on my part?? Especially bcs every day I just feel so bad for him that I'm depressed and I can't eat and it's just awful for us both.

I wish it didn't have to be this way, I really do, but I think his health has really gotten to a point where it's effecting everyone in the house super negatively(on top of the fear of dogs being triggered my fiancé is a light sleeper and the constant pacing keeps him up) but like god then I feel awful bcs I shouldn't be thinking about making things easier on myself, right? Even if my dog's a burden I love him and I should put in the work...but yeah it's just...it's so fucking bad and I have no idea how ANY of us are going to survive the next two weeks and that alone is making me feel way more like shit than anything else.

I just keep reminding myself that I'm doing the right thing, not by waiting, but by knowing that it's time for us to let him go, because god I can't even remember the last time he wagged his tail or got excited or happy about literally anything and he can't sleep or keep food down and he's 13 so it's not like we can fix it(and even if we could I doubt we could afford it, we can barely afford his meds) and the meds aren't even helping and I can't keep putting him through all this just because of my emotional baggage.

And I know all of this is the price we pay for loving each other and it's so very worth it but god is it hard sometimes. It's really fucking hard. And idk why but last year with my other dog it didn't feel this way, I didn't hate myself or feel selfish, maybe because she was def suffering a LOT but also she was still...idk she still had her wits about her? We really got to say goodbye, like she was still there for us to say goodbye to. This time kinda feels like I'm keeping someone on life support despite knowing they're never going to wake up bcs I can't deal with it and it's making me hate myself SO much I didn't even know what to do.

He barely even recognizes me anymore, and I can't comfort him no matter how hard I try. I almost feel like there's nothing for me to even say goodbye to because he's constantly confused and flinches when I pet him and won't come near me even when I call him over and keeps trying to bite me when I try to help him.

I just wish I could help him. Or that I could like...let him know that's what I'm trying to do, that I'm still here and I still love him. But I can't even do that.

[somestansomewhere]

Frank’s Dementia in 11a

Points to discuss:

Moments where Frank forgot.

Things he might be able to remember.

Other characters finding out.

Aftermath...

So to start of, I made a list of every instance in SEASON ELEVEN A, where Frank’s memory seemed a bit off, I’m not gonna analyze the whole series for this but I’m sure there’s more there. Now:

Moments Where Frank Forgot

11x01

1. Frank’s History of Chicago

While this does appear to imply just the opening monologue, there are actually several moments throughout the episode where Frank is talking about the Gallagher’s running Chicago to Alan. And while this seems like typical “Frank being drunk nonsense”, plus a spectacular opening to the season... I now see it in a different light especially after:

2. Frank’s Memory Elixir

Frank LITERALLY has a line asking for “memory elixir”, meaning booze, which Alan hands him. Ironic since he has ALCOHOLIC DEMENTIA. You can’t tell me that wasn’t intentional!

3. He Forgot Bars Were Closed

Now, I may be reaching here... BUT when Frank enters The Alibi for the first time this season (what a grand enterence btw) he says “I heard somewhere all bars were open again”. V responds by saying something along the lines of “three weeks ago maybe” and that the mayor shut them down again. Frank says “Well who the hell can keep track”. And okay, yeah maybe Frank genuinely didn’t know... but this is the bar he goes to EVERYDAY. Not to mention if they shut down less than THREE WEEKS AGO, Frank should know... idk this one might not count but I added it anyway. Kermit is unaware of bars being open/shut down in 11x03 so moving on:

11x02

4. The Alibi’s Secret Enterence

Okay, again REACHING! However, when Frank entered The Alibi through the Keg Zone door he forgot to use the “secret knock” and Kev had to remind him about it. Now in 11x01 he used the front door (and I’m not sure he knew to use the other door in that ep) but still at least he remembered to use the correct door in 11x02.

11x03

This is where it got noticeable.. strap in, here we go:

5. Taking Franny to School

He took her to the wrong school. This is the same person that knows the Southside perhaps better than his kids (lol), like the back of his hand! He not only took her to the wrong school but a middle/grade school. Franny is in elementary/preschool school. You can see in WHM’s face here that Frank was confused...

6. Uncle V and Aunt Kev

Maybe just a comedic slip up, but Frank calls Kev and V “Uncle V and Aunt Kev” as opposed to what they really are. Maybe he forgot? I’m reaching LOL.

7. Debbie Is Not Fiona

Frank talks about one of his favorite MEMORIES with Franny’s mom: Debbie, but “oh no, maybe that was Fiona”. Small moment, typical Frank but... nonetheless, poor memory. The writers are smart by mentioning Fiona in this scene... it’s “a Fiona mention”, we’re going to remember this, and that’s probably why they did it.

8. The Paper Store

Yeah, this was the first red flag for me and if I can recall, the moment EVERYONE knew something seemed off. Frank, walks out of the paper store with Franny and cannot remember where he is, or where they are headed. Once he is reminded of their “goals” for the day (by Franny, a five year old) he proceeds to head to the paper store... Franny once again let’s him know that they already went there and Frank notices the paper already in his (Franny’s) backpack. Ouch.

11x04

9. The Nation of Islam

Ooo this one hurt! After Frank suggests to visit The Nation of Islam in an attempt to get their help to get rid of the Milkoviches, him, Kev, and Liam do. We SEE them go there. It’s a whole scene, so later in the episode when Frank suggests to go ask them for help AGAIN as if it were a completely new idea, we as an audience know they already did that. As Kevin says they “JUST did that”. Frank forgot. Shit.

11x05

10. Mrs.McCurdy

Frank discusses with Kev about murdering Mrs.McCurdy, later he tries to murder her. We see it, we remember it becaue she grabbed Frank’s dick. It was funny, the scene evoked laughter, it forces the audience to remember it. Frank mindlessly walks into The Alibi and Kev asks Frank if he “did the thing”. Now at first Frank is confused. They were using “quotation talk” earlier so yeah I get it, but then when Kevin is more direct with Frank, Frank thinks Kev is implying that he had sex with Mrs.McCurdy... Frank is clearly confused. Only then does Kev point out that he meant MURDER. Frank takes a second, again if you watch he does not know what Kev is talking about, but then it hits him, and he remembers. Thus continuing the convo like nothing.

11x06

11. Monica

Now this one REALLY hurt. Frank’s first scene of the episode is a sex scene between him and Letty. She’s blonde, and Frank calls her Monica. He truly believes he is sleeping with Monica, only Monica is dead, she been since season seven. When Letty mentions that she isn’t Monica (thinking Frank calling her that was only a sex thing), we see WHM’s brilliant preformence once again. Frank doesn’t know what Letty means, he thinks she’s Monica. Then when he realizes she isn’t, he gets this lost dejected look on his face. He’s confused and knows that he keeps getting confused.

Frank says “I gotta get to work”. Letty asks him where he works and Frank is left bewildered.

12. Seven

Okay so remember Frank and Franny’s adventure in 11x03? Frank visits a dry cleaners to get some weed. They make a point of Franny saying that Frank will pay SEVEN for the weed. No offer is made and Frank must get it somewhere else. Throughout the episode Frank refterences SEVEN to Kev & V as the asking price to sell. We as an audience are forced to remember SEVEN. Also in 11x03, as Debbie frantically looks for Frank/Franny, she visits the dry cleaners where they were (retracing their steps). We as an audience have been there twice.

Now, in 11x06 Frank goes to pick up an order but like, we already saw him go there episodes ago. When the woman behind the counter literally tells him she has nothing for him and he argues with her, WE KNOW she is right. Once again, Frank forgot. I’m so sad. Not only that but Kev and V don’t have Frank going on runs anymore. Ian & Mickey are doing it... Frank is legit lost and forgot that he’s not doing that anymore, Kev tells him he’s not in 11x04.

Ms.G even says to Frank that she doesn’t need to write anything down to remember it because the “Mind’s a steel trap”. She doesn’t owe him... she can use her mind to remember where Frank cannot. The irony.

13. Pedestrian, Blue, Handlebar (abc)

a) Frank getting hit in the head results in him having a visit to the hospital where a nurse discovers that Frank has no clue how he got there and more specifically, how he got hit in the first place.

b) The saddest part, when asked his name he remembers FRANK. But has to look down at her sheet to know his last name is GALLAGHER. This is the man who walks around saying “It’s up to Frank Gallagher to save the neighborhood”. He forgot his last name.

c) The scene goes on, the nurse asks him to remember three words: pedestrian, blue, and handlebar. They discuss other things, then she asks him to tell her those words. It’s so abundantly clear that Frank just cannot. He doesn’t remember. He was told like 30sec ago and gets, for the first time ASHAMED. He’s the most shameless person ever (hence the title of the show) but now the tides have turned. He “doesn’t wanna play this game anymore”. Frank can recognize AGAIN that he is confused, only now he is forced to face it. The nurse noticed, she runs some tests and Frank learns that he has early stages of alcoholic dementia. This isn’t his liver, he can’t get a new one, this is his brain.

14. + 15. Letty & Terry

Just two bonuses, Frank wanders aimlessly into the Alibi again (like in 11x05) because it’s routine for him. Letty calls him over. Frank forgot they were supposed to meet there. :(

Frank and Terry on the porch: Maybe it’s just bad writing or they were trying to make a point but like a “Gallagher-Milkovich War” never happened??? We watched the show for 11 seasons... Also are the Milkoviches actually from Poland Frank? I’ll excuse that one cuz Ian mentioned it too, but I thought they wer Ukrainian. These seem like writing mistakes tho so oops.

Things He Might Be Able To Remember

Frank has his and Franny’s name tattooed on his body... he literally forgot his last name at the hospital. And if he forgets a bunch in 11b then that’ll be the payoff for the tattoo... he might not know why the tattoo is there or who the people are listed on his arm, or even what it means exactly, but he will know that Frank loves Franny.

Where he lives. Frank never threw out the paper with his diagnosis. He might remember his home, however the conflict comes in the fact that the Gallaghers might be selling it. He needs to be around people/places that are familiar to him. This could jeopardize his memory.

The Alibi is where Frank seems to just walk to or go to whenever he has no clue where he is or going but it’s subtle. I could see him getting lost and no one knowing where he is and Frank just being at the Alibi beacuse idk muscle memory? He’s on autopilot.

Early stages of ALCOHOLIC Dementia can improve. Like if maybe Frank were to tell someone and if he wasn’t removed from the Gallagher house, and oh I don’t know if Frank STOPPED DRINKING, he could remember. But I don’t think we’re heading in that direction, especially if the house is sold, and let’s face it... it looks that way.

Fiona? Will he forget her... this all feels reminiscent of 4x11.

Other Characters Finding Out

Franny, Kevin, and Liam, are the only people who have REALLY been subject to the possibility of noticing... but think about it. Franny is too young to notice anything, Kevin is not the brightest bulb, he doesn’t seem to realize it either, and Liam was exposed to it once, but at that time he was so scared about the Milkoviches that he didn’t notice it. Maybe if he saw it again, he would. Liam is smart enough.

I wonder if the Gallaghers will just find out the hard way (,like those stills from 11x08 are making me think,) or if anyone will begin to seriously pick up on it. I intially thought they would show Frank forgetting in front of each character until someone was able to notice but scratch that. They seem to be setting Lip up on the “alcoholic path” this season, (and I may go more into depth about that one another time, it’s another big post if I do get into it). But what will the Gallagher’s reactions/feelings be towards Frank’s diagnosis? Mickey and Ian had many Terry/Frank discussions in 11x06 literally setting up for it. It hurt when they all kept dismissing Frank because yup, they don’t know yet. They would have to help him in order to keep his memory maintained, but that’s the thing... Frank’s pride. He might deny their help even if they actually were to give it to him... Either way, I’m “looking forward” to see how this all unravels and how everyone finds out and what their reactions will be, which brings me to my final topic:

Aftermath...

So what happens? Will they sell the house, potentially causing Frank to forget? Will he not know his kids, his history? Will he die? Will Frank finally stop drinking... yeah I doubt that... So what WILL happen? Will the Gallaghers be left to take care of Frank? Will they even do that? Will he remember them?

What if in 1x01 Frank’s narration IS his memory? We see him talking about his kids to someone? It circles back? I don’t know, but either way I expect this whole thing to pull on our heartstrings. When the rest of the regulars find out... it’s gonna get real, and rough.

Interesting stuff coming up in 11b I’m sure. Let’s see how this plays out for our Protagonist and Patriarch: Frank Gallagher.

Omg, if you read through this, you are so cool and I really really appreciate you! Please send me an ask or write a note, I would love to get your take on the matter. 💙

Hope you enjoyed this analysis and I hope it didn’t go on too long.

[pantsless-glowboy-stan]

cannot stop thinking about tomix dadding the hero now,,,,,I have so many things to do so here is a collection of thoughts™

(if you read this as heromix/ship I will come into your house and steal your eyeballs the hero is a BABY)

- I usually assume bk1 tomix is like,,,18-20? in this au he's a bit older, like 23-25. maybe his spirit hunts took a little longer, idk.

- usually I think of bk1 hero as being anywhere from 16-22, found the dragon egg at like 16-18.

- in this au, people generally assume the hero is older than they actually are - not THAT much older - but they hear "has been running around stopping sepulchure" and "is destined to save the world" and "has a dragon" and think okay...this kid is probably at least 16, right??

- WRONG they hatched the dragon egg at 13

- so many people (warlic, celestia, etc) are extremely uncomfortable with the idea of the fate of lore being in the hands of a 13yo but *shoves them aside* We Aren't Talking About That

- after they've been a hero for a while - say, a year and a half? - they're kicking around waiting for a lead on the next orb and find ravenloss, where they meet tomix for the third time!

- tomix, who is introduced to them in a dark cave with minimal lighting, in falconreach at night, and then in another dark cave with even less lighting, initially assumes they are an adult. like, a smallish young adult with a high-pitched voice, but. he's heard about the hero of lore! he's heard the stories! it's not unreasonable to assume this person is At Least 18!

- then after accepting their help and interacting with them regularly he's like...okay...this person is probably somewhat younger than 18. no big, I was running around doing dumb dangerous stuff as a teenager, I can't really talk. I'm a little concerned about their parents or guardians but they seem to be mature enough to take care of themselves?

- then for some reason they have to go above ground in the daytime and -

tomix, squinting: hey, uh, hero? how. how old are you?

hero: 14 and a half, why?

tomix, feeling suddenly incredibly old and terrified: h.

- tomix then attempts to very delicately grill them on, like, their parent/guardian situation (they shut down so fast he gets whiplash), where they...like...sleep??? (serenity charges them an absurdly low price for room and meals and calls it a hero's discount) and who exactly is looking out for them when they're running around after liches and necromancers and whatever (draco, always! sometimes I join up with people, like you!) and comes to the conclusion that every adult in the world is failing this child.

- and like. tomix is not a parent, okay?? he's only in this country to find greed, and who knows where the next hunts will take him. he cannot be responsible for a teenager, much less a teenager with world-saving power. he is Not Here For That.

- however.

- ...aspar has looked out for him for over a decade. maybe if they had a soulally...? but they'd have to be a soulweaver.

- well, that's alright. two birds with one stone; he's been noticing their clothes are just a little too short, just a little too threadbare. he can weave them some clothes to show them the theory and then they can weave their own whenever he leaves.

- he tries only once to get them to stop helping him quite so much. they don't throw a fit but he can tell they desperately want to. they just leave in a huff, and he foolishly thinks that's the end of it.

- the next time he heads out to find a key they refuse to leave his side.

- have you ever tried to get a superpowered 14 year old to take no for an answer?

- It Doesn't Work Very Well

- he gives up. at least this way they can stay out of worse trouble - he may or may not have nightmares about their stories of their quests for the orbs - and he can teach them how to weave or fight with spiritlooms as the two of them go along.

- riadne teases him about his little shadow, and the hero teases him about his crush, and for the most part everything goes well.

- then: the hero defeats greed.

- some protector, tomix thinks, to get knocked out and let a child banish greed for me. he doesn't say any of this. the hero is staring at him and his ruined hands with real, stark fear, so he pushes down the pain and shame and tells them they did good. after he's recovered a little, he sends them to the elemental planes and tries not to panic.

- how do the teachers at edelia let this happen??? it's insane. it's insane with baltael himself ready to yank a student back into their body and it's a thousand times worse when the hero's only anchor is him and his half-learned theory.

- after an agonizing short while, the hero comes back, allied with a spirit of valor. tomix is so proud it hurts.

- (but also - valor. valor, who expects a hero for a weaver despite edelia's laws. he knows aegis probably didn't know quite how young they were, them being a formless spirit and all, but tomix is still ready to tear out his hair.)

- ("couldn't they have found a spirit of, I don't know, patience or something?" he gripes to aspar. "or another kindness spirit???? come ON."

"not everyone can be as lucky as you," aspar teases. "i wish the pair of them the best of luck in their battles.")

- he meets their soulally, teaches them a few more weaving techniques. but eventually he can't find any more excuses to stay.

- he trudges up to falconreach to say goodbye. they're about to go off and find the earth orb; they don't have long to talk. they stare up at him with wide eyes, and he spares a moment to hate whoever first let them run off alone to get tangled in this mess of a world.

- "good luck, kid," he says, and ruffles their hair with the soulwoven gloves he made for specifically this purpose. they shriek in outrage, and for a long while his last memory of them is their screwed-up face ready to take revenge.

- (when he thinks about why he is doing this endless hunt he usually remembers his mom, his little sister, his terrible overprotective big brother. now he starts remembering a hero, too, and a promise to himself that this one thing would not fall onto their shoulders.)

- then: years later, but not that many. the hero would be about...16? barely? he hears about a hero frozen on the battlefield.

- (jaania does not know how close she came to being strangled with her own soulthreads.)

[crystalstar8]

Knights of the Night (ch 19)

Chapter 19

Ch 1, ch 2, ch 3, ch 4, ch 5, ch 6, ch 7, ch 8, ch 9, ch 10, ch 11, ch 12, ch 13, ch 14, ch 15, ch 16, ch 17, ch 18, ch 19

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29139240/chapters/71536491

pairing: Jungkook x oc

genre: vampire au, college au, twilight, romance

word count: 1,012

warnings: blood (obviously), kidnapping, child kidnapping, needles, France, human trafficking

notes: vampires, vampire au, college, college au, so many twilight references, blood, needles, kidnapping, children, homelessness, dance, ballet, flashbacks, romance, slow burn, probably no smut, idk yet tho, France, French things, attempted genocide, inaccurate French history, bisexual main character, @strawberriewithchocolate-blog @mozy-j  @daechwitad-2​ @zobadak​ @fallenstar-7​​​

summary: Catalina starts college in a small town all the way across the country. She doesn’t know anyone and isn’t exactly looking for friends. She just wants to focus on dance. But when she meets fellow dance major, Jimin, and adventurous, fellow freshman, Jungkook, Catalina ends up discovering a whole new side to the small college town; one that is dangerous but oh so enticing...

When Jimin finally awoke, he was met with a set of big blue eyes staring back at him. He gasped and tried to get away, but the action made his head ache something awful. He held his head in his hands and glanced up. There was a little boy sitting beside his bed staring at him…no. Not his bed. This wasn’t his bed. This was a dingy cot in the corner of a tiny cement room. The little boy was staring at him with wide eyes. He had ahead full of dark, unkempt hair. He was pale and shivering.

“What’s your name?” the boy asked.

“Jimin,” he said. He wanted to panic, but that probably wasn’t the best thing to do right now, for the sake of the child and for the sake of his still throbbing head. “What’s your name?”

“Caleb,” the boy said.

“Do you know where we are, Caleb?” Jimin asked. Caleb shook his head. It was then that he noticed the needle in his arm. The needle was connected to a tube, which ran up to a blood bag on an IV pole. His heart sank. “Fuck,” he whispered.

“That’s a bad word,” said Caleb.

“Sometimes, a situation calls for bad words,” said Jimin. Caleb smiled.

“Yeah, this situation is pretty fucking bad,” he said. Jimin’s eyes widened.

“Just don’t say that around your parents,” said Jimin. The smile fell from Caleb’s face.

“I don’t think I’m gonna see my parents again,” said Caleb.

“Why would you say that?” Jimin asked, carefully peeling the tape off holding the needle down.

“I’m not stupid,” Caleb said, picking at his sweater. “My mom told me that there’s people out there who kidnap kids and sell them. And that’s why I have to be careful with strangers. I saw a ton of people come in here and talk about prices, and they tasted my blood. It’s so creepy! I already had two roommates before you got here. Both of them got sold right away. I bet you’ll be next. The Dracula guys like pretty people who are adults more than they like kids I guess.”

“They don’t like kids?” Jimin asked.

“No,” said Caleb. “Well, they said that my blood is really good ‘cause it’s clean. But they said that kids are too much to deal with. I guess it’s a good thing.”

“Probably is,” said Jimin. He slowly pulled the needle from his arm and then reached for Caleb’s arm. Caleb let him do the same with his needle.

“They’ll get mad,” said Caleb.

“We’ll put them back in in a few hours,” said Jimin. “How often do they come in?”

“Not very often. Like, twice a day to give us food and put the needle in or take it out,” said Caleb.

“We just won’t let them take too much from us,” said Jimin. “Besides, my friends know where I am. They should be coming to rescue us soon.”

“That’s presumptuous,” said Caleb.

“That’s a big word,” said Jimin.

Caleb shrugged and said, “I learned it from a book. I like to read. Do you like reading?”

“I used to,” said Jimin. “Now I’m too busy to read. I go to college, so I have a lot of homework and dance practice.”

“You dance?” Caleb asked. “My big sister is in dance class too.”

“Oh yeah? How old is your sister?” Jimin asked.

“She’s twelve,” said Caleb. “I’m eight. I miss her, even though she’s a jerk sometimes.”

“I’m sure she misses you too,” said Jimin. “You’ll see her again. Hopefully soon.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

  “You actually showed up!” Makai shouted, standing up to greet them with open arms.

               Yoongi led the way into the room, Catalina and Jungkook following behind.

               “Yoongi is the best one for this role,” said Namjoon.

               “Why? You’re the leader,” said Catalina. “I feel like they’d expect you to be the one going in.”

               Yoongi chuckled and said, “Namjoon is too nervous. He can’t act his way out of a paper bag.”

               “I…well yeah,” Namjoon said, not trying to defend himself. “I can’t act. Or lie.”

               “So, to review,” said Jungkook. “We’re acting as Yoongi’s familiars. We’ll go in, buy Jimin, and then leave?”

               “Right,” said Namjoon. “Nothing else happens that day. We’ll execute the second part of our plan another time.”

               “I suppose I was curious,” said Yoongi, shaking Makai’s hand. Makai had that easy going smile on his face. It was disarming, Catalina needed to stay focused on hating the man.

               It was nerve wracking, being able to just walk into the facility like this. Catalina had never felt this kind of adrenaline before. She tried her best to stay calm and regulate her breathing though. Namjoon warned them that vampires can basically smell fear. They can hear when a human’s heart beats faster and smell when their blood rushes quicker.

               They were standing by the desk in the middle of the lounge-like space. This was the area Catalina and Jungkook saw when they snuck in.

               “Are you looking to buy today?” Makai asked. “Or were you just in the neighborhood?”

               “I’m not sure yet,” said Yoongi. “It depends on if you have anything I like.”

               “I’ve got quite the variety,” said Makai. “And all our products are very high quality. All very healthy and clean.”

               “That’s good to know,” said Yoongi. “Most of these kinds of organizations get their products off the streets, they’re usually riddled with drugs and diseases.”

               Catalina chose not to think about why Yoongi knew that.

               Makai chuckled and said, “I have to admit, we started our company like that. We’ve improved so much over the years though. Anyway, I can give you a tour. If you’d like, there’s a waiting room in the back where your familiars can stay.”

               “No thank you,” said Yoongi. “I’d rather they stay with me. I don’t trust you just yet.”

               “What’s not to trust about this face?” Makai asked, pouting a bit. He burst into laughter. “I’m totally joking. You have no reason to trust me, you barely know me! I hope we can be friends someday though. I like you, Yoongi.”

               With that, Makai led the way deeper into the facility. The first door he opened made Catalina’s heart drop. The woman inside was limp and pale, sitting up against the wall on a cot. Her hair was thin and her lips were blue.

               “We’ve had her for a while, so I would probably let you have her for a hundred if you’re interested,” said Makai. He closed the door and continued down the hall. He pointed at a room through a pair of archways and said, “That’s the recreation room. There’s snacks, if you guys want anything.”

               “Chocolate?” Yoongi asked.

               “Haha! Sure, let’s see,” said Makai. He went in and rummaged through the cupboards. Catalina hung back with Jungkook and took his hand. He squeezed her hand back, leaning in to whisper, “Are you okay?”

               Catalina nodded, even though she was starting to feel queasy. Yoongi came back to them with a mouthful of Dove chocolate, more in his hand.

               “Jungkook will have his phone in his shirt pocket, with the camera facing out. It’ll be recording the entire time,” said Namjoon. “This way, we can map out a basic floor plan.”

               Catalina glanced at the phone in Jungkook’s shirt pocket as they were led deeper into the facility. Makai continued showing them “products”, as he called them. There were so many. Catalina didn’t know how she’d be able to leave them all here today. She hated thinking about Jimin in this situation.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               Jimin tried his best to keep track of the days, but without any outside light source and an irregular sleeping schedule, time quickly began to blur together. He had no idea how much time had passed. He what he could though.

               He didn’t let the vampires take too much blood from him and Caleb, just enough so they wouldn’t notice a loss. He made sure he and Caleb ate everything they were given, to keep up their strength. Every few days, or so Jimin figured, they would have a break from being hooked up to the IV. During those days, they made sure to eat and move around as much as they could.

               But after a while, everything began catching up to them. They were slowly losing energy. Jimin hoped his friends would find him soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               Seeing these people, tired and limp, and hearing Makai list off prices like they were at a car dealership made Catalina feel sick. She knew this kind of thing went on, but to see it with her own eyes was something she would never forget. She had to keep reminding herself that they would come back for these people.

               “This one is a little feisty, but if you keep her drained, she should be fine,” said Makai, closing the door on another cell. “Did you see any you liked? Did you at least like the tour?”

               Catalina’s stomach dropped. That couldn’t have been the last one. Where was Jimin? Did someone already buy him? It hasn’t even been a week!

               Jungkook took her hand and squeezed hard.

               “Do you have anything else?” Yoongi asked. His bored façade was still going strong, or maybe it wasn’t a façade. Catalina couldn’t be sure. Did he even actually care about these humans? Either way, he was doing a good job on this mission.

               “I mean, we have other humans, but they’re not ready for purchase yet,” said Makai.

               “I want to see them,” said Yoongi.

               “Sure, were you looking for something in particular?” asked Makai.

               “Eh…not exactly. I suppose I’ll know when I see it,” said Yoongi.

               Makai pointed to him and said, “I totally understand. Ya know, it’s like buying clothes. Fashion trends change so fast and I never know what I want to buy for summer, or for winter or whatever. But when I see it, I know! Can you believe the early 2000’s are coming back? It just ended! Give it a break for a bit!”

               Makai laughed heartily as he rambled on, leading them to a different hallway. He opened a few doors and introduced a few people inside. These people looked a little less tired than the others. These ones still had a bit of color in their cheeks.

               The third door he opened was the one. Jimin stared back at them with wide eyes. The fear in his eyes melted away when he saw them. But there was another set of frightened eyes staring at them from over Jimin’s shoulder.

               A child sat behind him, clutching Jimin’s t-shirt.

               Yoongi faltered. He didn’t say anything for a moment.

               “Is this the one? Are you having your moment?” Makai asked.

               “How much for both?” Yoongi asked.

               “Oh…well, the kid isn’t for sale,” Makai said.

               “Ten thousand for the kid,” said Yoongi. “One thousand for the other guy.”

               Catalina watched with amusement as Jimin pouted, glaring at Yoongi.

               “Okay, so these guys aren’t really for sale right now,” said Makai. “So you’re gonna have to-“

               “Fifty thousand for both,” said Yoongi. Makai closed his mouth.

               “Ya know what, I like you Yoongi. So I’ll give them to you for fifty and a half,” said Makai.

               “Deal,” said Yoongi. They shook hands, Makai smiling wide.

               “I’m just warning you, this one’s squirrely,” Makai said, pointing to Jimin. “And the kid is too smart for his own good. So do with that what you will.”

               “I have these guys,” Yoongi said, gesturing to Jungkook and Catalina. “I’ll be fine.”

               “Right on, man!” Makai said, slapping Yoongi on the shoulder. “Let’s go to my office.”

               Makai’s office was beautiful; the first thing Catalina noticed was the zen garden in the corner, bamboo shoots rising from the center. The whole office was dim, with stylish, plush furniture filling the space. The sound of running water brought Catalina’s attention to the black stone mini water fountain on the desk at the center of the room.

               Makai went behind the desk and pulled out two forms.

               “Are you paying cash or bitcoin?” Makai asked.

               “What the hell is bitcoin?” Yoongi asked. Makai burst into laughter.

               “Cash it is, then,” he said once he finished laughing. “Just go ahead and sign these for me real quick. This one is a nondisclosure agreement. Don’t go posting about this on social media and definitely don’t tell the cops!”

               Makai laughed again, but Catalina didn’t find any of this funny. She wanted to get out of here as soon as possible.

               “And this one is just an agreement stating that once the transaction is complete, the product is nonrefundable and fully your responsibility,” Makai said. Yoongi signed both forms, then pulled several stacks of cash out of his jacket pocket. Catalina and Jungkook’s eyes bulged. He was just carrying all that in his pocket?, Catalina thought with a start.

               Makai laughed and pointed at them. “Looks like your familiars are thinking the same thing I am. You’re gonna get robbed doing stuff like that, man! You’re stronger than the average guy, but vamps like cash too, ya know!”

               “I don’t go shopping very often,” Yoongi said, counting out the stacks of bills.

               “Clearly,” said Makai, double checking the cash, then storing it in one of the desk drawers. The two of them shook hands. “Do you want them delivered or do you want them right now?”

               “I’m parked outside,” said Yoongi. “I can take them now.”

               “Sounds good to me,” said Makai. “Just go ahead and wait outside, I’ll have someone bring them up.”

               “Don’t damage them,” said Yoongi. “I like my products pristine.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~

               Jimin and the child clinging to him stayed silent as they got into the car, all the way until Jungkook parked the car in the lot of a Popeye’s just outside of town. Then they all piled out of the car and Catalina and Jungkook immediately tackled Jimin in a tight hug. Yoongi climbed out of the car slowly, then helped the child out of the back seat.

               “What’s your name kid?” Yoongi asked as Catalina and Jungkook fussed over Jimin.

               “Caleb,” he said in a quiet voice.

               “You’re safe now,” said Yoongi. “We’ll get you back to your parents.”

               Caleb’s eyes widened.

               The whole group of them went into the Popeye’s and ordered as much food as everyone wanted. Caleb squeezed into the booth with Jimin, the rest sitting on the other side.

               “These are my friends I was telling you about,” said Jimin.

               “Ooohhh,” Caleb said, eyeing all three of them as he munched on his fries.

               “Are you guys hurt at all? What was it like in there?” Jungkook asked.

               “I mean, it wasn’t even that bad,” said Jimin.

               “Yeah! It wasn’t even that bad!” said Caleb.

               “Okay, I mean, it sucked really bad, and it would have been worse if we got bought by someone else before you got there, but it worked out fine,” said Jimin.

               “Yeah, the situation was pretty fucking bad!” Caleb said, giggling and dunking his chicken strips into too much sauce.

               Catalina and Jungkook’s eyes widened. Jimin and Yoongi just laughed.

               “Don’t say that in front of your parents,” said Jimin, ruffling the kid’s hair.

               “I just can’t wait to see the look on Namjoon’s face when we bring a child home with us,” said Catalina. Yoongi groaned and put his head in his hands.

               “Yeah, I can’t wait either,” he said, sounding like he could, in fact, wait.

[story-collector]

Maribat AU AU!

Adrien and Marinette are 13 when they become miraculous holders

14 when they add to the team (Chloe, Kagami, Luka)

14 when the save Damian from bleeding out on a mission gone bad.

The League of assassins want him back

They start fighting team miraculous

To bad Ass bois, we've adopted Damian and you cant have him back

At 15 Marinette becomes the Guardian

She gives Damian the turtle miraculous for when he goes on patrol with him

They want him to have a real childhood so they try to keep him from the fighting

But theres only so much they can do about a 9 year old that was raised as an assassin

He has energy

Patrol seems to help

And occasionally he gets to beat up someone

But not often

He is Precious and he is absolutely not allowed to fight in real akuma or league battles

(He tried once and they took away his miraculous for a month and didnt give it back till he apologized. They were all very emotional about their child that didnt get a childhood)

(Adrien connects with him pretty well)

Over time they add more to the team (Alix, Kim, Max and Nathaniel) as the fighting gets worse

Damian doesnt like the fighting or his family getting hurt (yes he considered the miraculous team his family, both in and out of the masks) so he leaves (leaving the turtle miraculous behind)

The team is devastated and search for him for months

They are more vicious with the Akuma during fighting

(Also Lie-la comes in but that's normal for maribat)

Shortly after Damian leaves canon stuff happens and he is brought to Bruce

Damian doenst like these new people

He misses the family he made in Paris

They learned Arabic for him!

And taught him English, and French and Mandrin, and some Japanese and Italian (he was still learning) and sign language! (American, British, French, Arabic)

He doenst like this new family

They arent as affectionate and he misses that

He closes off again

He still becomes Robin

But he feels that he is betraying his old family by fighting in battles

Anyway

Usual Gotham trip

The miraculous team helped Marinette (class president) plan the trip, send in the application and fundraise (plus extra)

They win, Lie-la takes the credit, and some things get changed (like where they are staying. Luckily they saved extra because even though the stay is cheaper the extra prices are not) ( and its next to crime alley (I dont remember who's idea this was but I didnt come up with it))

Kagami is on the trip

Luka is the only one in paris

But they have the miraculous box and Kaalki (mabey Max has her, that seems pretty canon by now or mabey it is idk I didnt watch s3)

(Also Marinette hasn't taken off the turtle miraculous since Damian left)

They know the tricks Lie-la will pull

(They get left at the airport. That's 8 students that you "forgot" Bustier(?) But they are a well oiled fighting machine and some of them have a good sense of direction so they make it to the hotel fine)

(Also not my idea but I forgot the owner (I need to bookmark stuff more) but the class has to wait because marinette is the only one who can get passes and check in because she won the contest so they are waiting there)

(She apologizes profusely to all the staff for her classmates behavior, they all adore her (mabey background twitter posts? Also not my idea))

Anyway

They plan to get up two hours early every day.

Theres no way that they can miss anything

(Also batfam themed outfits because Marinette is MDC)

(Overly connected Marinette and miraculous group because their just that good, they also dont flaunt it so no one really knows)

Usual Lie-la "I'm dating Damain Wayne and I had a fling with (insert Wayne family member)" Rossi

(Damian is 13 here, the class is all around 17-18)

Wayne tour day!

Get up 2 hours early and go out to explore

Leave note with front desk to let them know if Bustier asks about them and to tell them that they went out (they try Bustier tells them off, shes trying to do a "headcount" and she doenst listen)

The group is very nice to everyone

Also!

Mom friend Mari

Chlogami

Acedrien (Ace Adrien)

Alix×Kim×Max

Nathaniel and Marc (Marc is still in Paris)

Wander Gotham (Chloe, Kagami, and Adrien have been here with parents so they know some places)

Impromptu photoshoot with batfam outfits (much badassery in pose choices)

Breakfast at a cafe near wayne tower

Meet exhausted tim

Mom friend Marinette takes over

No more coffee young man

Tim is mothered

Tim gets adopted

He fine with this

He likes being cared for (dont tell jason or dick) (batfam needs to get on the actual family aspects of a family, come on now yall)

He also just pulled a 48 hour work "day"

Asks for a photo with his adopted new family

It's his new homescreen

Jeez this is long

No regrets, let's keep going

Marinette is Batman (batmom! No be quiet Adrien)

Adrien is Spoiler (purple looks good on you Agreste. Thanks batmom)

Alix is Red Hood (you dont even need a helmet! Yes you do. Yes batmom)

Max is Red Robin (tech bois unite! Thank you Adrien)

Kim is Orphan (gotta represent those badass girls yall!)

Chloe is Nightwing (you both have that wonderful sunny disposition. Shut up Dupain Cheng)

Kagami is Robin (you guys are so alike it's scary. I agree. Same)

Nathaniel is Batgirl (didnt she die though? No) (here is where a second HC can fit in)

So anyway they have met Tim, adopted him.

Even though hes 17

And their 17/18

Hes their child now

They spend an hour talking and stuff

Then they remember, oh yeah tour

So Tim takes them to Wayne Tower (he has promised to go home after they start the tour. He doesnt want to upset his new parents and aunts and uncles)

Dick is already there and tired of the group because she "forgot" 8 students (8!)

And hes been listening to Lie-la complain and lie for like 45 minutes

They cant start the tour with out Marinette but Bustier insists that it's fine and I basically being a little shit

They arrive with Tim and Dick is like immediately ok now we have a new sister and then he realizes that shes Marinette

The group goes over to him

The rest of the class hasn't noticed them

They drop off Tired Tim

And she sincerely apologizes to him and the staff for her classmates behavior and gathers the passes so that the tour can start

Dick has basically claimed her AND the rest of her group and his flock now

Especially when Tim tells hime what they did for him

(The outfits are a definite bonus. They would fit right in!)

Ok I'm running out of ideas

But basically they do the tour

Regular maribat shenanigans

They meet Damian at some point

He turns back into the child hes supposed to be and crystal on their shoulders and basically refuses to leave them

Obviously theres an identity reveal

Marinette absolutely demolishes Bruce because HE WAS 10 DAMNIT! LET HIM BE A CHILD INSTEAD OF A SOLDIER!

Also Marinette fashionista (who the hell told you that was a good design. No I'm making you a new one)

Lie-la falls (stop lieing about my family Rossi. Damian be nice to the rat)

Hawkmoth gets revealed (just because your a good detective doenst mean I forgive you)

Mabey they get adopted by the rouges (they knows our science, they're good with plants, they're absolutely adorable, they're smart)

Mabey Iceberg lounge because come on I want to see more of that!

But yeah this is what I've got.

I'll add the stuff for Nathaniels HC on a different post.

[threeletterslife]

AYSIB...

DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN’T READ ALL YOU SEE IS BLUE (I MEAN, UNLESS YOU WANT SPOILERS)

「 background 」

man i held onto this plot for over a year before i wrote it. looking at my google docs history, i came up with the idea on feb 13 of 2019 (wow and the day before the lovey dovey spirit of valentine’s day 😀how ironic). this is an excerpt, VERBATIM, from that same original plan that i made on the doc: “ok so here either jk STOPS the sacrifice or helps yn run away or IDK HE SAVES HER or she dies in front of his eyes hahahsbfhdjs”

yes. i came up with the idea. the castle. the price. the sacrifice. but i had no idea how the story should end 😀😀and this was all before i had any idea of yn and jk’s characters too! (i essentially came up with the plot and then dipped lmao) 

but fast forward a year later, i revisited this idea in my drive and found that it actually had a lot of angsty potential LOL. i decided to tie this story into my society series! (it wasn’t originally planned to be so.) and my society series as a whole has this ongoing trend where the characters just end up succumbing to their strange society’s needs. so i knew once i put aysib into the society series, yn would have to end up dying 😀😀the next step was to figure out how i would execute yn’s death and also somehow develop her relationship with jungkook???

「 characters 」

making the characters for this was especially significant, i feel. if you know mbti, i typed yn as infp (also a pisces) and jungkook as intp. i wanted to make yn a dreamer—someone who dreamed of living in the royal castle. someone who would be so excited and happy she was chosen that she was blinded to her actual surroundings. then, i needed a male lead who is charming but cautious (maybe even cold at times) and also—and most importantly—morally challenged. in a strange way, prince jungkook is also a dreamer. he’s naïve (has been outside the castle like, once) and doesn’t understand hardship as yn does. he’s privileged—hella privileged—and doesn’t know what to do with it. he feels sorry for himself and not the poor sacrifices. he feels sorry that he has to witness murder... and yet doesn’t do anything to stop it. and when yn asks how he’s going to rule, he tells her he will just like how his father did. he’s definitely not big on change, yet he envisions it. yn, on the other hand, knows hardship but she chooses to block it out of her life to protect the fantasy bubble she lives in—you can see that in the way she casually talks about her “mother” who doesn’t act like a proper caregiver to yn at all. personally, i think that “dreamer + dreamer = chaos” because no one in the relationship is going to shake the other’s shoulder and go “snap out of it! get your head out of the clouds!”

i wrote this in an ask but jungkook is what i would call, lowkey cold, midkey alcoholic, highkey broken. he’s also a bit of a coward. even if he loved yn (which he didn’t) but even if he was in love with her, he would’ve still let her be sacrificed.

i don’t think what yn and jungkook had was love. and it will never be love. yn thinks of jungkook as her savior (at least, in the beginning). to her, jk is her literal prince charming. he’s nice to her, helps her acclimate to royalty and! he even pays attention to her!! it’s a win-win-win. but she doesn’t love him. she may adore the idea of him. but let’s face it. how much do they know about each other? not much. and are they willing to sacrifice anything for each other? no. if the cerulean king asked yn if she’d rather kick herself out of royalty or jungkook, she’d kick jk out in a flash. and jungkook... well, he literally let yn be sacrificed and watched it too. they were two pretty lost souls who just met fleetingly and parted just as quickly. they used each other to feel a little less lonely. (and jungkook gets brownie points for knowing what would happen to yn but still choosing to lead her on 😐) but i do sometimes think about how their possible romance could’ve blossomed if they had run away (though the thought is brief because as a couple, they would not survive a single week together)

but in all honesty, i had a really hard time writing yn’s character. i mean, she was so innocent and go-with-the-flow, and if you’ve read some of my other female leads... none of them are like her at all LMAO. but it was refreshing to write a different character. and it was satisfying to let her die after she broke through her innocent bubble. something she had idolized her so much had been the cause of her demise. i find that ironic. but technically, she died for her own cause, right? the skies in the cerulean kingdom will be clear and blue thanks to her 😳😳

jk’s character is complex. dare i say the most complex character i’ve written?? so i guess he’s my favorite character i’ve ever written then 😳😳i find it funny that he pities himself for being the prince of the cerulean kingdom. in reality, shouldn’t he be pitying the poor sacrifices?? if he hated it so much then why doesn’t he stop his father? sounds like daddy issues to me 😐and why was he so infatuated with yn? i mean, yeah, she’s canonly attractive. but why her? or is yn part of his annual cycle...? does he fall for every sacrifice girl who steps foot in his castle? what if yn wasn’t special at all? i’ll leave that one up for reader interpretation

but i will say that yn’s death affected jk a lot. we’ll be having another one of these ‘jk’s character’ talks after the spin-off is posted!

「 extras 」

fun fact,,, this story was supposed to be like... way longer! like way, way longer. 20k+! yn was supposed to stay alive for a week or a full MONTH before she’d be sacrificed 😳i originally planned that yn and jk would actually fall in love. that they’d explore the whole castle together (stables, ball room, closet room, pool room etc.) i had too many ideas but decided that i’d rather let yn be sacrificed after three days because i didn’t think the yn x jk chemistry would work out in the long run. three days seemed like sufficient time for them to only have good memories of each other when yn ultimately dies 😀(they’d know each other on a shallow level, yk? enough to be infatuated with each other but nothing too serious at the same time)

god it took me SO LONG figuring out which scenes to cut and which to keep. the ones that did make it in were the winery, kitchen, garden, library and bedrooms 👀the wine room was important to show jungkook’s alcoholism 😀the kitchen was to show how indulgently jungkook lives in comparison to the poor villagers (the privilege was real 🙄). the garden was a “first-time” meeting ground for the two of them—where yn was the closest to the sky! we needed the library for some light ‘reading,’ which yn doesn’t like (and therefore shows that she uh... ain’t that book smart i guess 😔). and the bedrooms were just there for convenience i guess LMAO

i’m actually really happy with the current length of aysib. if it was any shorter, the characters might not have been well-developed. if it was any longer, the story would’ve felt dragged on

「 motifs/final questions 」

lmao well, the sky was a big motif as everyone probably noticed. yn loves it so much because she always has to look down during harvest. the sky offers her a sense of escape. too bad it landed her right into a brutal sacrifice 😔also! it is never proven that the sky gods exist 😐imagine if they killed all those poor innocent girls for no reason... lesson learned, should you really believe what everyone around you tells you?? or should you figure out shit by yourself? 🧐is it even moral to sacrifice one person for the good of everyone else?

and why did the king choose yn? did he see jungkook eyeing her? is he that sadistic that he wanted someone who caught his son’s eye to be sacrificed? or was it just plain bad luck?

it’s open-ended and up for interpretation 😌

[anyu-blue]

Busy as a bee

~

*sigh*

I had this big long thing typed up.. it's all gone now. That's twice it's happened. Let's see if third time's the charm.

It was about my trying to figure out how to talk about the shit I've been going through without just dumping it all on someone and having it be totally unjustified too...

I'm mad at my dad. I'm mad at Tevs... I'm mad at myself.

Basically...I'm frustrated that I'm seen as so much lesser than everyone else.

I know it's like 'no you're not!! You only think you are!! They love you!!' ... I've been smacked both literally and figuratively for saying 'you guys treat me different/unfairly compared to x'... But.. gods at this point I. Just. CAN'T keep believing them or telling myself that when the evidence is right in front of me. I feel like I must have done something REALLY BAD and BIG for everyone to pull away so hard... But at the same time... I... Can't figure what it is or how. I've asked too, but the closet I've gotten to an answer is 'You're too much, Meek.'

I know I sorta... Became a worse recluse than I was (kinda I'm response to that. Trying so hard NOT to be too much)... But I kept telling and telling and telling I was available and offering what I could and more... I kept trying to deal- if I need something I would provide in return, just name the price... Did I forget or fail to follow through with something? Or something? No one can think of anything to tell me that didn't have a legitimate reason if ever I did (as good as or better than they have given me) that I shared up front and sometimes in advance with them. I even went into detail about what might happen if I am asked for help on a bad day- I tend to be a bit grumpy if woken up, but will still be there to help and will apologize for any harshness as I am going about it. I do that- but... Nothing.. and every single person has offered and practically forced (in W0lfie's case) all of the stuff I've asked for onto anyone but me. Need help finding/getting a good word in for work! Sure!! *Gives me links to indeed and Job service sites I'm already on/refuses to say my application is in the mix for positions at their workplaces or downright says they don't know if I'm a good worker even though I gave them my sick day and late count and all that fun stuff to pass off or downright doesn't tell me there's a good opening they know about*

Oh such-and-such is happy where they're at? So-and-so Can't hold a job because they keep quitting? *Gives information about good jobs and puts in a good word for them and sticks their neck out to get them hired.. is surprised when the offer is rejected by the family that says they're already okay with their current work or the unreliable friend they got hired quits*... Oh woe is me, I need help and there's no one to turn to!! *Refuses to call me knowing I have the day off, have my phone on, and have said I'm free that day... Asks literally every other person even the ones that demand payment for the job or can only do a part of it.. or just ends up doing it themselves by dropping another important obligation instead of calling me*

:(

The most common excuse for that last one is. 'oh I didn't want to make you more stressed.'

Um... I offered? I was here the whole time? What...?

*sigh*

I suppose I wouldn't be thinking of that stuff or be so upset by it all except for the fact I'm told these things and then I'm shown (and told) this last week people think I'm EXTREMELY lazy...

My dad and everyone else wants me to/thinks I should work more than 3 days a week... Or should get on disability if it's 'that hard.' Obviously they've never tried and seen THAT shit show... I have looked into it. Not only have I gotten treated like something to be disgusted by friends, family, medical professionals, and jobs alike (because it's oh so despicable to be on social security while young and spry- even though I have medically frail on my damn chart I'm apparently 'young and spry'- fuck you) when I've tried to pursue it, also being on it ISN'T a cake walk.. the restrictions. The WORK you have to do (and the work you can't do!! I'm right in the middle and technically can work too much for disability, but not enough for getting by on my own). The shit you have to go through... My own therapist told me some programs I could pursue would put me further behind where I am and I could possibly never get out... And she was the one that pushed me to get foodstamps, so it's not like she thinks they're hooey...

My dad thinks me working 3 days a week and refusing to do more lest I break down all the time is just.. lazy.. unfortunate... Stupid. He wants me to take all these homeowners and car buying and loan classes... Like I'm EVER going to be able to afford a single one of those things.. or think it's a good idea to throw down $25-$150 a pop for a class, let alone spend 8 hours taking one (I'd love to and think they're amazing things, but uh...)... Like somehow it'll 'convince' me to 'work harder'.

DUDE.

What.

The.

FUCK.

Is WRONG with you?!

I get it... I seriously can't work more days a week. If I do, I completely spiral out of control from the pressure as well as the guilt from spiraling and and.. you get the idea. I just do. I know I do. And I found my balance in 3 days on.

It's pretty easy to think 4 days off are, well.. 4 days off. 4 days to play. 4 days of freedom. But... I make things... I've made two blankets already. One more I'm working on.. usually AT work because I'm so busy. Birthday gifts. Christmas gifts. Holiday gifts. Trying to do commissions too to get more money in. Also.. em... I'm usually awake during the day to.. make appointments because my health is just a mess.. helping the friends that HAVE asked for help... Running errands because I can't at night (partly due to Covid changing everything's hours)... Or if I HAPPEN to get to.. I'm sleeping because I'm on a night schedule.. at night if anyone had need of me I'd be right there!! But guess what, THEY are sleeping. If I actually have a night off (which I haven't in nearly a month now because I CAN go over to my friend who needs help's house at 5 in the morning.. after I drop W0lfie off at work or I'd be there sooner.) I'm DOING things. Wednesday itself happens to be dedicated to FIXING my sleep schedule that I screwed doing everything my sisters need or want me to do during the day... It's up to ME to screw MY sleep so THEY can get or have what they need/want... Never mind they refuse (with legitimate reasons) to do the same for me (though I have legitimate reasons I could say no as well, but ooooh I'm the 'bad guy').

*rubs face* I'm so busy my mind and body is screaming at me in pain. Sooo lazy 🙄

But yet I'm shit because I refuse to work more.

Idk what it is, okay? I. Don't. Know. Maybe it's the fact that I'm Autistic and something overloads that hasn't been address like ever and so has only gotten worse (this is my guess), or the PTSD is doing something (my therapist's guess--- which not to derail but WHO ELSE IS IN THERAPY IN MY FAMILY?! you want to guess? That's right, NO ONE... No one is even TRYING to deal with theirs, and I don't just mean the pandemic. Big sister had it as bad, if not worse than I did. Refuses. Dad and step mom knows they do. Little sister scared. Little bro disinterested. 'There's no time' or 'costs too much' despite several having free sessions available to them via their job and Heath insurance- with multiple options- and everyone but little sister making more than they ever have in their lives on top of relying on others to pay any bills they can't keep up on... GRR).. or something else that just makes me become such a wreck. I hate it more than anyone else, you know.. because I have to live with it AND everyone telling me how lazy and lucky and entitled and how 'much' I am.

...

And you want to know what sparked all of this?

Tevs worked a 12+ hour day that ended up having me woken up by the cats that hadn't been fed.

Let me explain... Tevs and I got into it badly after I was continually deprived of sleep because she was working so much and blaming me for 'making' her deal with stuff at home I didn't even know were problems. She continued to explode and explode and treat W0lfie and I TERRIBLY after work as well AND continually told our other friends and family she so desperately needed a vacation and LESS work, and just kept pulling 10, 11, 13 hour days she didn't have to... All while not eating or drinking or having bathroom breaks... and I was DONE with it. I have and had offered to do more, just need to be directed on what needs to be done that I can do while they're asleep (duh) so she had no leg to stand on there... With the rest... She promised to not work more than 10 hour shifts (agreed upon because I have a 10hr shift at work with no breaks too) AND to either let us know in advance if she was going to be late so I could feed the cats, or have someone do SOMETHING to get the cats fed so they weren't deliberately jumping on me to wake me up... You know.. communicate a little more. Do a little better so she wasn't killing herself working. She promised.

Well..

Apparently (new information to me) a promise and Tevs giving her word.. are two different things. Promises don't matter. Giving her word had weight.

What. The. Fuck.

So MY getting upset this last week that not only was she working more than 10 hours... Not only did she not tell anyone about it.. not only did the cats come to wake me up (after I had FINALLY fallen asleep a short while before due to just how BUSY I was that day, and it was Wednesday 😭)... But she also REFUSED to speak to ANYONE and tell her where she was/that she was safe- completely and deliberately ghosting everyone... Until she showed up at my dad's house 12+ hours after the start of her shift in which she didn't eat, didn't drink, and didn't use the bathroom for the entirely duration..

...

I was told to back off. That my upset was unfounded. That I was just like our horrible mother and I was just trying to control her life.

Does that sound right to you?

It does to my dad. I would wager my step mom. All of their friends. And of course Tevs.

Nevermind that W0lfie was just as freaked out and upset... That she actually has a front row seat as to what I go through now/how hard I try to be kind and careful and respectful and relaxed and NOT controlling and finally gets it... And that she's now directly effected by all of it too... And agrees this is MESSED UP as hell...

No.

I'm shit. I need to work more. I need to move out and be on my own. I need to not rely on anyone. I am 'too much'.

Where did it all go wrong?

I now understand exactly why I felt and still do feel unloved. It's because of this stuff... I got smacked and told I was never alone or on my own.. that I had so much support and help... but.. well.. yes I was. My mind and abilities and more belittled or looked over in favor of others to bring up. Everyone is guilty of doing this to me in my family. I won't go into details because it's a lot. Many times.. many bad ones... Often I was told my reality wasn't the truth too. How is that supportive? I appreciate every bit they have ever done for me, but trying to point out where they fell (just like all people do).. I'm suddenly the most ungrateful thing ever.

My own parents rely on each other AND a third party (their son) to pay the bills... My dad's siblings both live with his parents... My step mom's family members live with each other and rely on one another to get bills paid.... Not a single one is forced or really suggested to go room with randos if they can't do it on their own. It was brought up to W0lfie that it's an option for her this last week... But guess fucking what she got that I didn't AS WELL as that.. "We'll always have a place for you here."

I did get that when I was younger and nearly kicked out for refusing to tell my mother I was Trans. I eventually caved, but, HA they didn't believe me. That mess was sorted out.. messily and I got to stay... Lucky me... Not to mention the fact that only NOW I might finally be able to just accept it and not closet myself for the sake of everyone else because I'm THAT done.. yay therapy. I'll accept being non-binary because I can never actually be a man the way anyone around me will ever accept or believe.. but I'm not accepting 'being a woman'. Screw you peeps XP

...

I don't get that kind of support because I'm their eyes.. I'm too much. Should be able to do it on my own. Too lazy. Too awful as Tevs has managed to paint by completely omitting important details.. I can't say things in a few words. I just can't. Because this is exactly what happens... But regardless.. that's all she ever shares. Just enough I'm a monster. I'm sick and tired of it.

Reminds me...

My dad and mom and the rest of our family would never get birthday gifts or holiday cards or anything if I wasn't around. Same with our siblings. I remember. I make. I remind. I push. But... They don't even know about that. About what I try to do for them that gets twisted to look like it's all Tev's doing because I often can't make it to deliver it myself... And when I do idk.. I guess I do it wrong or something because it's so... Blah of a response.. like they think I'm NOT responsible for it and just taking credit... That hurts. A LOT.

...

I'm going to try. One more time. Once more. With Tevs. Give her one more chance to make and keep her word. To not bulldoze and make excuses and talk me up like some sort of unreasonable monster if/when she doesn't... And one more chance for my parents to hear me out. Get the full story. Get my feelings and experiences in return. On Monday I might have a chance to lay it all out. Maybe. I want to try. And if I get the same treatment.. well.. I think they might just be cut out of my life if I finally make it out on my own like they want. (Hopefully something income based will open up for me.. hopefully... I'm considering looking into a different city altogether to well and truly get away from them.. but that would depend on getting a job too.. bluh)

Ah that's a another thing too though.. the thing is.. I CAN work. I CAN pull 7 days a week, 16 hour days without spiraling!!! Making. I am a crafter. If making dresses or cosplays or embroidering or making blankets or trinkets or... If I was able to do THAT.. I could work and work and work no problem... Maybe even drawing..

But with the stress of this job and my other obligations, I can barely touch those things to even get started... Stick in the rut.. and materials are so expensive if I need anything extra I hit a roadblock... Totally locked in... And it breaks my heart...

I'm not lazy... I'm in the wrong job 😞

[costellos]

LOL A 401K IM DEAD but honestly...... tru

all that tax stuff, retirement plans.... nanami’s got it covered. and then there’s gojo, committing tax fraud 🤧 i’d compare gojo to salt as a seasoning but that’s kinda mean, he does have some flavor. like, sugar probably suits him better?? sweet, can be addicting, but bad for you if have too much of it 🙈 AND THEN NANAMI. man’s the whole spice rack, he wouldn’t have it anything less since he loves food so much 😤 he is, as we say, umami personified 🤌

yeah, it’s unfortunate lmfao but oh well. i do occasionally have them in a smoothie though, like you said!

alsjfhsha it’s def time consuming.... like i’d be sitting down w my family and when i’m finally done picking it all out, they’ve finished eating welp 😭 and yeah, the rational part of me knows that, but i’m that person someone has to go up the service worker for and be like “excuse me she asked for no pickles” (except i didn’t 🙈) i’m much better in restaurants bc the language barrier isn’t as intimidating so i will tell them to leave out an ingredient if it’s something i can’t easily take out

mmmmm i can see that! he’d be the guy who’d eat pizza with a fork and knife wouldn’t he lol. and dab all the excess oil off w a napkin. he probably only goes to the Legit pizza places too haha but i think if he likes you enough he can be convinced to eat almost anywhere

ofc!! ask games are more fun if it goes both ways 😌 and ooooo tsumu! interesting...... 👀 those are honestly such good date ideas w a guy like atsumu! that’d rly be smth he’d enjoy and ngl the moment i read ‘something physical’ i immediately imagined y’all racing LMAO. he’s a prime example of how competition can be good for you w the right person, so i can see you filling in the space osamu left after he decided to focus more on his food aspirations. like imagine making cute lil bets w him and the loser having to do what the winner wanted hehe. omg a double date w the miya twins would be sm fun tho??? from my impression of you so far, i definitely trust you to keep tsumu in line lmfao so catch me there. me and osamu are the ones spectating and judging your guys’ competitions and cheering you on to beat atsumu like we’re olympic commentators or smth LOL

aaaaa i’m honestly p shy but if anything can get me to come off anon, it’d be nanamin 😂 (it’s like we’re todo and yuji bonding over their shared type but w nanami skdjfjsjsjs) let me know if you prefer to keep it here or on discord and i’ll give you my account, whichever platform you like better! also congrats on 1k! much deserved!! 🎉

cut for length!

A;LDSKJ GOJO WOULD COMMIT TAX FRAUD. lmao salt is a lil mean!! sugar is more fitting <3 sugar is also used for more fun foods, and I feel like it matches him bc of his sweet tooth. but Nanami........ o lawd. definitely the whole spice rack yes. 100% agree. pls I would use him in everything. wait was that a weird thing to say?

ah I totally understand! well, u got this friend. the next time u go out for Mexican food, I’ll be there cheering for u in spirit!!

and yes.... ugh... I don’t think he’s particularly picky, he’ll try anything. he just doesn’t like foods that are excessive, if that makes sense? like what you were saying with the grease. I think he’s more the type to like subtle flavors. an obnoxious meat lover’s pizza from The Hut would be a no go, but he’s down for a, quote, Legit Pizza Place. the kind of Italian restaurant that’s authentic! but let’s admit it, by that point it wouldn’t even technically be “pizza.” authenticity comes with a price :’)

ty friend you’re far too kind 🥺 AND PLS YOU’RE MAKING ME BLUSH OVER MY LAPTOP HHHHHHH. I would love nothing more than to fill the Osamu-shaped hole in his heart once they both go into their separate careers. and god..... don’t encourage him. or me. I would definitely make bets w him. and I would win. but thank you sweet anon, I would do my best to keep him from annoying the shit out of you!! it would be an honor to have you and Osamu comment on our tomfoolery. 👉👈

MY GOD I WAS ABOUT TO KEYBOARD MASH AGAIN. we’re definitely Todo and Yuji.... u like Nanami and so now I’m obligated to imagine a whole life we coulda had together in high school together. even tho I graduated five years ago. and I’m assuming you did some time ago too since you mentioned you’re old...... lordt. anyway! thank you for the congrats!! I would love to discuss more headcanons and such w you over Discord! dm me and I’ll add you so that we can sob over Nanami’s absence in the anime <33

nanamin date anon said: me, rewatching eps 9-13 on replay until the new episode comes out: hahaha i love all the jjk characters equally! nanamin and *looks at smudged writing on hand* the extras

lol i love them all rly, it’s just super refreshing to have an adult like nanami in a shounen

haha yeah, i’m definitely glad i’m not the oldest (bc that’s way too much responsibility for me, idk how they do it) so being player 2 as a younger sibling isn’t too bad, especially since it’s the story that i’m usually more interested in rather than the gameplay itself. i don’t have to worry about remembering which buttons to press in a fight when i can just watch the plot play out lol. (it’s definitely a good game, i just suck at the controls 😅 my brother let me play a bit and i couldn’t get the web swinging down i was struggling so bad aslfjjfsjak) what sort of games are you into? 👀

even if it’s boring to some ppl, watching is a good way to experience the game for yourself as well, esp if it’s a single player game! ofc i do tend to prefer multiplayer games, but it’s not too dissimilar to watching someone play a sport tbh. AND NO KENMA IM PRO-SIDEQUEST LIVE OUT YOUR COMPLETIONIST DREAMS. if we gotta fetch that dude a super rare item to unlock his backstory we MUST do it ok

YEAH! mikorin is also voiced by noya’s va! it’s honestly a shame gsnk didn’t get a second season, it’s so good 😔

me: lol does that mean kuroo’s your tomoda

kenma: ok this date is over

LMFAOOOOO not my fault the popular choices are the ones that get you the good end 😤 and it’s all good, i’m also guilty of replaying to see how the other choices impact the story haha. if there’s no save system tho, i’d make him switch out w me every time we replay bc i’d zone out at all the repeat stuff (bless games that have a skip option 🙏)

UGH TELL ME ABOUT IT!!! ok so I love the other charas too but.... Nanami’s so good. so good. iono about you, anon, but I went back and rewatched his episodes from the dub and it made me Feel Things. and I agree, it is refreshing to see an adult like him in shounen. esp since he treats the kids like kids. and he makes it clear that their being kids is never a bad thing. I will reiterate: he’s so good.

ahhh friend that’s so nice!. your brother sounds really chill. plus it sounds like a good balance: you get to watch the story, and he gets to dick around!! win-win. and as for my fav games, I’m up for anything! I try to avoid co-op games like Overwatch bc I get too competitive and I’m a sore loser lmao (but they are fun!). the last games I played were the Last of Us 2 and Persona 5, two very different games, but stuff that’s a good time nonetheless. tbh as long as I can immerse myself in the story and there’s tons to explore, I’m down. what about you?? you’d kind of mentioned otome games and Animal Crossing, but I’m curious!

hm. interesting. that’s a nice way to look at it. I guess if it’s a really good game, it’s no different from an interactive movie! also Kenma would love that omg you’re going to save so many villages in the rpgs he plays w you.... gotta max out EVERYTHING. every side quest! every mundane task!! collect literally every feather!!! but I feel like he would pass the time by making idle conversation. like some dumb shit Lev had mentioned earlier that day. such a nice way to unwind at the end of the day, shit talking Lev w his fav person 😌

anyway! going back to completionist stuff: Kenma would have such a blast going back and replaying games w you! and yes bless games w a skip option hhh. thankfully he’d remember all your previous choices together, so he can help navigate where to go next. he has no qualms handing the controller over, I think he’d love to curl up next to you and analyze how you play! but I also feel like he’d be giving unwarranted suggestions....... thanks, Kenma.

also, about Mikorin’s va: WHAT. OH MY GOD. so many things to learn..... pls. indulge me w your trivia.

[luci-cunt]

Hey, idk I'd you're still doing this but for the AU prompt mash up thing, andriel with royal and criminal! 😊(only if you want to of course)

Yes indeed-y I am still doing this and loving it!! love you anon!!

[Psst– send me two fic prompts and I’ll tell you how I’d mash them ;)]

Oh boy I love royal aus and I love criminals and I love andreil so this is everything I hope you enjoy non!!!!

(sorry in advance I really couldn’t stop myself, it just kept. on. going. XD):

So, Luther is king of… we’ll call it something super original: Carolina.

He’s crazy, super religious and burns people for being “witches” and stuff.

Tilda is his sister (duh), she’s also crazy but in a “I’m-gonna-go-on-a-forty-day-bender-and-come-back-unwed-and-pregnant” kinda way.

When she actually does this, Luther flips, covers the whole thing up, and throws a ball to celebrate her very sudden marriage. At the ball tho, this old lady comes up and asks if Tilda wants to know the gender of the baby, which is crazy, cause no one knows she’s pregnant ‘cept Luther and Tilda. Luther tosses the chick into a fire but not before she can spout off a prophecy, something clever and pretty vague and easily mis-readable like–

“REUNITED TWINS WILL BE YOUR DOWNFALL YOU ROTTING SIRE! AND BEWARE THE BUTCHER’S HEIR!”

However, the prophecy counts death as a reunion, so Luther can’t just kill both of them and he decides killing one of them is too risky. Luther scars one of the boys so they won’t be so identical and then boots him.

And so, Andrew Doe grows up family-less and scarred while Aaron grows up a very well guarded secret who’s not allowed to leave the palace. No one knows that Tilda has a son– let alone two– and everyone assumes the only heir to the throne is Nicholas Hemmick who’s on a weirdly long business trip? 

(naw he ran and fell in love with his husband and is thriving on another continent)

That bit about the Butcher is pretty concerning, since Luther’s main executioner is Nathan Wesninski, the infamous Moriyama family Butcher who was given as a gift of good will to Luther. It’s not like he can kill Nathan, so he just bans him from ever having kids.

Nathan’s like “fine by me” so exactly 0 of the women he fucks survive to tell the tale.

UNTIL– Mary. She escapes just barely and nine months later Neil is born but here he’s called Abram and not Nathaniel for obvious reasons XD

Anyways, Mary raises Neil on the run at the same time as Andrew’s doing the opposite of thriving. They meet by accident, Mary leaves Neil in the town Andrew’s living in and Andrew tries to rob Neil and almost gets gutted for it.

They’re like, 13 so Andrew’s like “teach me how to do that now” and Neil’s like “no go away” and he bolts off to find a new hiding spot. Andrew finds him though, and Neil runs off again. Rinse and repeat. (look, Andrew’s like 14ish and bored out of his mind)

Eventually Neil gives in and agrees to teach Andrew to protect himself if Andrew agrees to steal some fresh fruit for Neil as payment

Andrew agrees, steals fruit and Neil starts training with him and they become quick friends. Neil mentions he wants to become a Knight someday and explains that him and his mother are running from his father (but doesn’t mention who that is)

Andrew spills that he’s never had anyone and that he thinks Knights are stupid.

But then Mary returns, she snatches Neil up and whisks him away to another town and Andrew’s alone again. He doesn’t like this, and there’s nothing in the town to keep him, so he finds Neil again.

Mary catches on and picks up the pace, threatens Andrew, and just tries to loose the kid any way she can but no matter what he always pops back up.

Eventually Nathan catches up to them, but this time Andrew is there. Neither he or Neil are fast enough to save Mary but they get themselves away to safety.

Together, in the dark of a barn with sheep and pigs rustling around in the warm night air, they make a vow. They swear to kill Nathan Wesninski.

Neil still wants to be a knight but he realizes that becoming one of the kings soldiers in order to kill one of the kings men isn’t exactly the smartest idea, so instead, him and Andrew go to Palmetto, a tiny little kingdom that’s on the verge of death and has an extraordinary crime rate. The queen, Kayleigh Day, died and her son went mysteriously missing, leaving the kingdom in turmoil.

Wymack is the leader of one of the largest gangs in Palmetto, but Neil and Andrew go to one of the smaller gangs first. They join, work their way up, and then talk to Wymack as equals, having taken over the gang. Wymack’s impressed, if a little wary of the two, and he offers Ally-ship.

(btw this takeover has taken years, they’re like, roughly 20′s now)

The two agree and tell Wymack about their plan to kill Nathan, Wymack admits to having contacts within the castle who could help but– it comes at a price.

He knows where the real prince of Palmetto is, and he needs them to go and rescue him. Neil and Andrew don’t like this plan but Wymack’s help is kind of necessary so they agree, queue a kickass rescue/ kidnap scene where Neil, Andrew, and the foxes all gang up to save Kevin who doesn’t know he’s being saved. 

During this tho, they run into Riko since Kevin’s basically his personal servant, his “2nd in command” blah blah or whatever

Riko has met Aaron, and he knows vaguely about the prophecy because it was kind of a hot topic, but, as far as he AND the Moriyama’s were aware Tilda only gave birth to Aaron, except, Andrew is just uncannily similar to Aaron and– oh is that Butcher hair? What did you say your name was? Neil? huh…

Riko manages to trick Neil into getting caught but Andrew and the rest of the gang escape with Kevin. Riko tries to get Neil to admit who he and Andrew are but Neil won’t admit he knows who Nathan is and he genuinely has no idea who Aaron is. 

By the time Riko finds out Kevin’s gone he’s beyond pissed. He doesn’t want to admit that he lost Day (who’s going by Kevin. No last name, the More-yams aren’t very good at hiding people) and he doesn’t want to hand Neil over without knowing that he’s the Butchers son. 

So he decides he’ll handle the whole problem himself, and then boast to Ichirou about how clever he is later, so he tells Andrew that he’ll give Neil back if Andrew gives Kevin back. 

Andrew’s like .2 seconds from doing just that but he also knows Riko probably doesn’t plan on giving Neil back at all, so he agrees to the deal but crafts a plan– he can’t kill Riko, but he can embarrass him to the point of Riko not being about to say shit without fucking himself over. 

And so Andrew takes Renee and a couple other foxes and they go to meet Riko, little does Riko know that Kevin is actually a bear enchanted to look like a man and also enchanted to be chill until they let him go (Renee’s a witch, forgot to mention that). 

However, little does Andrew know but Riko’s cursed Neil so that he has to come back to Riko in at least two days or Andrew will die. 

The deal goes down, Neil’s traded for bear-Kevin and it all seems to work out well since as soon as Andrew’s got Neil the whole group books it and once they’re out of eyesight they hear roaring and screaming. 

Everyone celebrates but Kevin knows it was too easy and he asks Neil about it, which leads to Neil spilling the facts. Kevin tells Neil that Riko doesn’t have that kind of power, there’s no way he could cast a curse that effects someone he’s never touched, but Neil doesn’t want to risk it. 

Unfortunately (or fortunately) for Neil, Kevin tells Andrew and so when Neil comes to do the whole “thank you, you were amazing,” Andrew just locks him in a room. 

There’s some tense waiting since there’s a slim chance that Riko does have that power and Andrew’s about to die– but then the deadline’s up and Andrews still around!

Now Andrew and Neil have another name on their list though, Nathan and Riko gonna die. 

Neil tells Andrew about Aaron, and they question Kevin, who barely knows anything but Andrew decides he wants to steal Aaron since their first kidnapping was so successful. 

Uuuuh, this is really long so: they kill Riko, Nathan, and Luther, Kevin is back to being king of Palmetto and quickly takes over Carolina and everyone lives happily ever after. 

(idk, if you want the ending or some shiz lemme know XDD or if you want a dif. prompt mash up also lemme know! This is so much fun XD)

[eldritchsurveys]

914.

1) What are some positive things, realizations or habits that came out of quarantine for you? >> I think I’m going to have to actually follow at least one survey taker because I’m tired of having to go to their actual blog every time I want to find surveys (Lane stopped appearing in the #survey tag for me around the time that tumblr updated the dash, for some reason, and he’s probably not the only one but I haven’t figured out who else got axed yet). So if you get a follow from aynrandslashfiction, it’s just me. EDIT: Realised I didn’t answer the question, pfffft. The best thing that has come out of pandemic for me is physical distancing, tbh. I mean, I’d prefer to not have the pandemic, of course. I’ve been dealing with people’s inability to maintain personal space for years and I would continue if I had to, but, you know.

2) How do you feel about people who are “workaholics”? Would you consider yourself one? How do you personally maintain a work-life balance? If you aren’t working, what personal activity or task takes up most of your time? >> I feel the same way about workaholics that I do about any other kind of -holic -- they’re probably escaping something in their life/past that they find intolerable, and I also feel like I would not want to get emotionally involved with them.

3) How financially responsible would you say you are? What could you spend less money on? >> As financially responsible as I can be on an income that is not meant to be liveable. It’s not like I can be terribly irresponsible, because I just don’t have enough money to blow in the first place. 

4) How would you describe yourself as a friend? What value would you say you bring to your friends? >> I don’t know how to describe myself as a friend. I don’t know what makes me valuable in a human interaction at all. This is the kind of understanding that is helped by testimonials from other people, and I don’t have enough data.

5) In psychology they say that our romantic relationships are an extension of our relationships with our parents, and that we tend to choose our partners based on whatever was lacking in our childhood, or that we are attracted to traumas and sufferings that are familiar to us rather than the unknown. Can you relate to this? >> Of course I can relate to that. 

6) Is there a specific type of survey you miss taking? How or where do you find new surveys to take these days? >> I mean, I don’t know. I don’t find new surveys very easily these days because there’s just not a lot of new ones being made, not like back in the day. That’s partially why I decided to follow along with the 5k Survey -- at least I know I don’t have to worry about finding new surveys for a while (and I can save-to-draft the good surveys I do run into, so I have a nice little pile of ones to take in between 5k entries, or in the future).

7) Do you still care about tags on surveys? When you see surveys that you know don’t credit the maker nowadays, how do you feel? >> I don’t care about it because it just doesn’t seem like much of a priority. If there’s already a tag on it, I usually just leave it there.

8) Is there anyone in your life who knows about your survey-taking habits? How would / do you explain the concept of our community to someone, if you ever have to? >> I’m relatively sure Sparrow knows about it, since I’ve been taking them for years, and I also occasionally mention them in conversations. It’s pretty easy to explain, I think, although my explanation varies depending on the person’s familiarity with the internet. Sometimes I reference MySpace bulletins or Quizilla, sometimes I describe them as open-ended essay questions taken for fun and introspection, etc.

9) What happened the last time you had a disagreement or falling out with a friend? Or the last time you had to apologize to someone? >> I don’t remember. It probably just went badly.

10) Can you tell when you are not well-liked? What do you do when you feel someone is not particularly fond of you? Can you remember the last time you were in that situation? >> I don’t know if I can tell or not. I guess it depends on the person and their level of aggressiveness -- some people are more obvious about their dislike for other people than others are. And as far as what I do, it depends on who the person is and what kind of mental health day I’m having. Sometimes I don’t care, but other times my brain gets stuck on a loop trying to figure out what I did wrong. Either way, even if my brain is on negativity-loop central, I still don’t try to convince them to like me or anything. I know better than that (and most of the time I don’t actually want them to change their mind, it’s not about that -- it’s just the shame spiral).

11) How would you say your preference in movies or TV shows changed from when you were a teenager vs. now? >> I think I still like the same stuff, I’ve just added even more stuff that I like now.

12) Apart from price and location, what are some deciding factors when choosing a house for you? What is something you love the most in your current home, and what would you change if you could? >> For me, my needs revolve around having my own bedroom, having a decent-sized bathroom and kitchen, and having enough windows. There are other things that I might like too, like hardwood floors, that are just hard to get along with all the other stuff (idk what everyone’s obsession with carpet is, but god, is it hard to find non-carpeted apartments that are within budget and have the other most important boxes checked). What I like most about this apartment is that I have my own room, tbh. Otherwise it’s pretty unremarkable.

13) Do you know any “influencers” in real life? How much are you actually likely to follow an influencer’s advice or recommendations? >> I don’t. I have sub-zero interest in influencers and I think the concept is rather socially and personally damaging.

14) What emotion is the hardest for you to express? Can you think of a time when you felt force or successfully expressed this emotion? >> All emotions are impossibly hard for me to express unless I’m alone (and even then, if the shame spiral starts, you can best believe I’ll even deny my emotions to my own fucking self). I’ve been trying to work on it -- not expressing emotions around others, that’s going to take a while, just... expressing them to myself -- and let me tell you, it’s a lot of work. What’s it like to have parents that did not completely retard your emotional and social development, setting you up for a string of human relationships that also further reinforce the idea that your emotions are huge disgusting ugly things that should be ignored at best and punished at worst?

15) How do you feel about job interviews? Are you good at negotiation? Was there a time when you felt you didn’t do so well during the interview, but still got the job? >> I have never been on a proper job interview, and I’m pretty sure I would bomb it just by being... you know. Not neurotypical. (I could fake it for an interview, sure, but here’s the problem with that: if it works, and I get hired, then they’ll expect me to behave like that. Which I do not, normally. And the only thing worse than not getting hired in the first place is having a horrible time on the job, failing miserably at things, pissing everyone off, and eventually getting fired.)

[hu-meow]

Gentleman Jack 1x03

Alright so I had meant to get back to this sooner, but things happen and were we are. I also realize there are a few others that have done similar to this, and they have amazing and far more intellectual and elegant and analytical words for this type of thing. Mine is far more, uh, "I like this because of blah blah blah." Anyway...

1) Fresh from the Lake District, our Ann(e)s find themselves in some lovely conversation only to be interrupted by some Rawson relations. Ann would much rather in with Anne, alone, and it is very clear when she answers Mrs Rawson. "Oh, Miss Lister, you're here. We can leave..." Ann "Oh, if you'd like" HA. Bye bitch, don't let the door hit you on the way out. But alas, they stay. And then Anne flirts, in front of her mother and Ann with Miss Rawson. Ann does this little eyebrow raise, almost like she's thinking over what Anne says, so cute. And originally I was burnt to hell about there being no show of the Lake District trip, but after reading the companion book, Anne didn't go/meet up with Ann there, so I guess that makes sense. But still. Seeing Ann light up would have been very swoon worthy.

2) I keep forgetting to mention how much I love the intro. I never skip it, even after watching it as many times as I have. The only other opening I never skipped was GoT. So. Good job on that one, music/sound team.

3) I don't know French, but Elizabeth Cordingley's complete butcher of it still cracks me up. Any French speakers reading this? Does she even make sense? Is she understandable at all?

4) This little sneaky walk to the "shed" is cute. Obviously Anne has planned it, but Ann is oblivious. And Ann talking about the Ainsworth's. It's like she's hoping Anne will approve of putting them off. At first, we just assume it's because Ann just wants to travel with Anne. But of course, later we realize (at least how I took it) that Ann would rather Mr. Asshole not be anywhere near her. Man, the way the writing sets up everything is just too perfect. Anyway...Ann's (Sophie's) delighted face when she sees the chaumiere! So adorkable. How can you not fall in love with her? Anne totally is, that's for sure lol We get our first two lip licks here (07:12 and 07:54) with Ann being nervous but trying not to be. Suppose it's more anticipation. But she was ready for that damn kiss. She even leaned in, but of course, Anne knows how to draw out that moment, and it makes it even more satisfying. And then the little tongue thing after from Ann. (9:34) It just slays me.

5) A quick "thank you James" and then an up against the door kiss. HNNG. And "...stay all night." GURL. Talk about the Thirst. Went from first kiss to that in .002 seconds. LOVE. IT. It even throws Anne off. And she plans her conquests out. But you can tell Ann was moving FAR quicker than she'd anticipated. It's like Anne didn't even have to try. lol She has to court so hard with these other women, and then here goes little Miss Ann Walker, all but throwing herself at Anne LOL def wife material.

(this is really long, so I’m drop this here)

6) I love spaztastic Marian. I think I love it most because her character was so different in GoT. Much more like Anne's. And here she's so NOT that lol. Emma plays the part so well. Everyone does. God I love this show. The spat at the table was great, with Marian being Marian and Anne trying not to smile through it all. Such perfect sibling dynamic.

7) Captain Lister about to spill the tea and Anne walks in and is like "we don't fight" LOL then continues to lay the verbal smack down to Jeramiah, like "did I fucking stutter with my price?" Anne def has the biggest balls of them all.

8) "Will you tell Calligula" LMAO just great little line. And random, but why doesn't Marian sport the weird little curls at her ears like everyone else does? I think she had them like, once, in ep 1? and that's been it. Just curious about that.

9) Ann asks Anne a few times "are you all right" and of course, Anne's answer to everyone else is always "I'm always all right." but I'm almost certain, Anne always answers Ann with some type of explanation. (there is the 'nothing' before Ann goes to Scotland, but more of that when we get to that episode, and she does still answer. MY HEART). But from what I can remember, Anne doesn't front with Ann that she's "all right". She gives her something, she's open. She's still trying to be strong, but she allows that softness too. Which brings me to probably one of my most favorite kisses of theirs. Its just so slow, and tender, and it's almost a side kiss, and just idk. It's very beautiful. ALSO I noticed this time, that after the kiss, both of their hands are on the back of the chair, and their fingers/pinkies are touching (29:50) It's brief and you almost miss it, but damn. I need that giffed. gif'd? gif'ed? as a gif. It's just too precious. They cant kiss more because of where they are and Anne is about to leave, but their hands are hidden and they just need that little bit more of contact and its just HNNG.

10) I love Aunt Anne. She's just a treasure and she love Anne so much and wants her to truly be happy. And I totally want to start saying "off you pop" LOL

11) Okay, so even though the Ann(e)s have done a LOT together, it just feels like this dinner is their official first date. They both dress up, it's dinner, Ann is nervous again and she's rambling and it's so adorkable and Anne thinks so too and just smiles as she waits for Ann to get to her point. Then there's still some nervousness with after dinner tea, and Anne is like, well, first date done, time for the big one with a reassuring leg squeeze...and Ann gets to the very idea of it being a marriage on her own! Cue floored Anne once again. I swear every time Ann surprises Anne, she falls more in love with her little Miss Walker. Ann is doing the lip lick think (38:59) and omg the way she says, and especially her face for, "give birth" is just as great as the first time. That should be a gif too LOL

12) Fucking John Booth going to the wrong damn house! Come on dude, are you even paying attention to what/were your mistress goes?? Facepalm for days. I think that actually happened though, if I'm not mistaken (it's been a minute since I read the companion book, and I read it at like 3am, and slept since...but if not, whatevs.)

13) OMG the full blown make out! Complete with some grubbling!! I find it interesting though, that Ann has Anne stop, as it becomes "too much" yet she had been asking her to stay all night. I wonder if this is a nod to how indecisive Ann was, or if she just didn't quite understand how overly emotional the physical stuff would make her. Either way, we end up with FIVE (5) nervous lip licks here, folks. It was a hard scene to not blink through, and lots of 10 sec rewinds to catch it all (42:13, 42:37, 42:44, 42:46, and a half one but I count it anyway at 43:00. I think I got those times correct, anyway. Just watch the whole scene, really.) And then we end it was Anne's 4th wall break and Ann asking what she's looking at LOL I know there's talk about wanting Ann to have some 4th wall breaks in season 2, and as much as I would love that as well, it's sorta almost a joke that everyone has it BUT Ann. So, even if she doesn't in s2, I won't be horribly disappointed, especially if Anne does it again and Ann asks again LOL

14) There were other things I had notes on, but I'm skipping because this is longer than the first two, and I hadn't planned that. Ah well...Back to the Ann(e)s....LOL of all the places, why is Ann on the floor? I mean, safety? Protection? Because shes just too fucking precious? I'd assume yes. But Anne is so confused and ready to fuck someone up and then once Ann tells her, the look on Anne's face as she goes from worry to relief is just amazing. Suranne, you fucking goddess. And then all the comfort Anne gives Ann as the poor girl just cries and doesn't think she's good enough. And again, I think this is a bit because of Mr. Fucktard, pressing and getting what he wants no matter what, where as Anne stepped back and made Ann comfortable. I swear Ann doesn't know what it's like to be put first, that her concerns are heard and understood and valued. Everyone just pushes their opinion or wants on her, and she's just had to go with it over th years. She just doesn't even know how to react to Anne and her attentiveness. It's so refreshing for Ann, even if she doesn't fully understand it. And also, because Ann was a wreck, three more lip licks, shit four! (50:59, 51:14, 51:20, 51:44)

15) Fucking Mrs SneakAss Priestly. She can't just leave well enough alone. So bored she's gotta fuck with Ann's happiness. We're having some hella good grubbling, the first fucking "I love you" and this old biddy has to ruin the parade. Anne was hella quick to jump up though. Almost like she's done that before (even though, she totally hasn't, amiright LOL) Ann(e)s just standing there after Mrs P leaves, and omg lol Anne has this "well fuck, how do we turn this around" look, like her brain is really whirling and hoping Ann doesn't freak out, mean while Ann just loses her shit and busts out laughing. So great that happened for real, too. Ann Walker, you are fantastic. "do you want to go upstairs?" because, hello, someone has blue balls at this point. But it's so cute once they get up to Ann's room and the scene nearly ends with her lip lick (58:23). But those stares, like yeah, we're totally in this together now....

AH OKAY. FucKIng LONG. I'm sorry! I even cut some things, so if you made this far, thank you! This was a really good episode, really kicks off their momentum and is sorta the calm before the storm. Oh, I also started to take note of the dresses Ann wears, cuz I swear she only wears like five. so far I have: That Blue Dress, the pink/purple plaid (first kiss), the pink with the sheer puff sleeves (that's what she's wearing in my fave kiss), the pink with some design (flowers?) for the "date", and a pink/purple color she's wearing at the end. So, that is five, and I'll have to see what else she wears, if any (yes shes wearing something else in Scotland, and no, night clothes don't exactly count. though her with her side braid and yellow corset and bloomers is my fave in the whole series...more of that later.)

Counts:

*Anne 4th wall breaks (ep): 3

**Total: 11

*Ann's lip licks (ep): 13!

**Total: 19

(there was a lot this ep, so I'm not going to list them here. And there was a fair amount of lip presses, which are def honourable mentions and worth watching...)